#a banger getting me through the gym today

[erenjaegerb0mbs]

Talk about your feelings? I'm going pitch black

Talk about my feelings? I don't wanna, fuck that

[svltzmans]

for worse or for better - h.m.

a/n: good morning! another banger request from ??? anon lets all thank them for their contributions to my blog 😭 this is the last fic in my request box so if any of y'all have something in mind you want me to write now is the perfect time to send it in <3

warnings: kinda angsty??? but then fluffy so its fine <3, mentions of periods, unnecessary cursing bc i am a sailor

y/n knew when she woke up that her day wasn't going to go well.

the squeezing pains in her abdomen had already started, and she wasn't having it. not even a little.

messily making her bed and getting dressed, she realizes that even the most mundane of tasks are stressing her out.

much to her dismay, she still had to go to class. and wickery practice, and to study group, and...

ugh.

more than anything else, y/n just wants to stay in bed. maybe shed a few tears and order a pizza. but that is a complete pipe dream.

"y/n! hi!"

it's lizzie, and she's in an annoyingly good mood.

"hey," y/n manages, her mood shining through in her tone.

lizzie feigns a frown. "someone didn't sleep well, huh?"

"i slept fucking fine, if you must know," y/n sneered, becoming irritated by lizzie's ever present charm.

"jeez, y/n. i'm gonna walk away now."

and she does, and y/n immediately feels bad. she knows she's pretty irritable on her period, but she thought she'd be able to control it.

but as it turns out, she's not in as much control as she thought.

y/n takes her usual seat in potions class, usually right next to her girlfriend, hope.

except hope's not there when class starts, and y/n is irritated. the one person that makes her feel better decided not to show up.

she sighs, resting her chin in her arms. she knew class would feel extra long without hope next to her, cracking jokes and sharing the doodles she draws instead of focusing and taking notes.

an hour finally goes by after what feels like three, and y/n is exhausted. she knows she has to go to wickery practice or face the wrath of penelope park.

does she care about that? not much, but she forces herself to change into a t-shirt and gym shorts and make her way to the field. she's sure hope will come eventually, considering that wickery is much more fun than potions class.

the team has already started practicing when y/n arrives, and she decides to just jump in.

making a few decent passes, she thinks her day might just be turning around. still with no sight of hope, y/n's disappointment grows in the pit of her stomach.

she forgets about her misfortune momentarily when she spots lizzie, preparing for the next play. she makes her way over, feeling unnerved that the blonde is still angry about earlier.

"lizzi-"

"y/n, don't apologize. i have a period too."

"how did you...?"

"i just know. that's the only time you ever act like that. well, that and when you haven't had caffeine in a couple of days."

"you know me a little too well. now, give me the ball."

toward the end of practice, y/n sits down on the bench, sipping some water. she scans the field for hope, thinking she might have missed her, but she's nowhere to be found.

it's not exactly unlike hope to miss class, and maybe even an occasional wickery practice, but y/n is getting frustrated. she hasn't seen her girlfriend all day, and hope hadn't made any effort to see her.

as if her thoughts could be read, hope plops down next to her, in her wickery uniform.

"what'd i miss?," she asks, placing a gentle kiss on y/n's cheek as she settles.

"uh, well, where do i start? potions, almost all of wickery practice... where have you been all day?"

"dr. saltzman needed me, we had to go-"

"well why didn't you tell me, hope? i've been worried about you. you can't just disappear all day. you didn't even put in any effort to let me know that i wouldn't see you at all today."

with that, y/n stands and starts walking away. she knows she needs to be alone before she starts saying worse things she doesn't mean.

hope is left completely blindsided by y/n's reaction to her presence. y/n never gets frustrated in that way, especially not with her. she figures something must be bothering her, and without much consideration at all, she comes to a conclusion.

after coming down from her anger high, y/n is consumed with guilt from the way she treated both hope and lizzie. she at least had attempted to apologize to lizzie, even though lizzie had practically done all the work for her.

she decided that she couldn't face hope, not like this. she is almost ashamed of the way her eyes are puffy from the tears that had streamed (and are still slightly streaming) down her flushed face.

just as y/n starts to prepare to sleep, there's a quiet knock on the door.

"y/n? it's me, are you in there?"

it's hope, and y/n decides that she has to talk to her eventually.

"yeah, i'm here," she mutters, voice still weak from crying.

hope creaks open the door, shutting it gently behind her, and sits at the foot of y/n's bed.

"are you okay?"

"totally fine."

"it looks like you've been crying."

"nope. just... allergies."

a silence falls between them, with a worried look on hope's face as y/n avoids her gaze.

"y/n..."

before hope can even start her sentence, tears are welling in y/n's eyes. she crossed her fingers that hope wouldn't notice, but soon the few tears turned into a small stream.

hope moves closer, wrapping her arms tightly around y/n's torso. "oh, baby... it's okay. you're okay," she whispers, gently scratching the back of y/n's head.

"hope... i am so sorry, i don't know what got into m-"

"shh, hey, it's okay. i understand. i get a period too, you know."

"lizzie said the same thing! like exactly!"

y/n can't help but laugh, and hope soon joins her.

"c'mon, let's get some rest, yeah?"

"only if you'll stay tonight."

"y/n, if you think i'm going anywhere, you have lost your damn mind. but, i think i need to borrow some of your pajamas..."

"say less."

before she knows it, y/n is dead asleep, hope's arm draped lightly over her girlfriend.

hope pulls her closer, planting a light kiss on her forehead.

"sleep tight, don't let penelope park bite," she whispers, giggling quietly to herself.

[babygirl-riley]

Hardcore Bangers*

You have been best friends with Simon Riley for years now. You didn’t know that he was singing up for the military. Once he tells you both you listen to both of yours favorite band, leading into some tension you both needed solve.

Simon “Ghost” Riley x Male Reader

Warnings: Fluff, swearing, blow jobs, hand jobs, smoking, and non established relationship

simon x reader guide

simon x reader smut list

Both you and Simon had been friends for quite some time. Ever since the 6th grade, you both were now in your last year of high school. You have seen all sorts of colors of Simon, from his laughter of the stupid shit you two would do, to him crying from what his father had done to him. You hated his father, you told him when you held him that both Simon and you would leave this place. He would just nod and not say anything.

Today was on of those days that he came over throwing his bag across your room. He rarely cried at this point, just was angry all the time. Which to be fair you would be too, he tells you all the time that he was jealous about your family, how they were so happy.

“Ya know we could just leave.” He said as you both listened to the Metallica song playing in the background.

You scoffed as you drew on your paper pad. “Leave? To where Simon?”

Simon strolled to you plopping himself on the bed. “Anywhere y/n, anywhere but here.”

Simon was a big dude for the grade that you all were in. He started to hit the gym the older he got. Getting himself big and hell considered playing for the local football team. So watching your bed mold with him as he laid down wasn’t a surprise however, the way your bed squeaked made you feel odd.

Lately your feelings towards Simon was developing into something bigger, not just friends but something else. Which scared you cause at this time, gay wasn’t really the trend. You didn’t know how Simon would feel about you liking him that way let alone any other man. So every time you felt something come up you pushed it down, usually hide it well.

Simon looked over at you as your face went bright red. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. I just don’t think it would be smart, I mean what about school?” You stated trying to move pass it.

Simon scoffed looking away up to the ceiling. “You care too much about school,” He paused. “We can go after, once we throw our dumb caps up we can head away.”

“What about your mom or brother.” You said trying to think logical of the situation.

Simon paused thinking, you could tell at least. “They can stay with pops.”

You went quiet knowing that the night before Simon was beaten, you could tell by the fresh new bruise on his face. Simon told you it was just him rough housing with Tommy but you knew better. “Why me?” You asked not thinking about the question.

It didn’t come out rude, no more of finding the answer. Simon sat up and looked at you. You stopped doodling and looked back at him. You both sat there just staring at each other, you tried to look through his eyes to see what he was thinking. “Why does it matter?” He asked almost whispering.

You glared for a moment before chuckling. “I mean you could ask the girl you’ve been walking around with at school.” That came out harsh.

Simon rolled his eyes. “Beatrice,” He stood up at that point. “That’s nothing, plus you’re my mate, so I rather take you.”

That was a couple months ago, now both of you and Simon were listening to your favorite band. While the song changes he cleared his throat and turned it down. “Hey,” You turned to him from your desk having your attention. “I have to say somethin’.”

You turned your chair fully towards him. “Yeah?”

Simon sat there on your bed for a moment looking at you. He looked like he would have dropped dead or wanted to. Simon’s leg bounced before he inhaled deeply. “I signed up for the military,” It went deadly quiet. Military? You blinked blankly at him. He sighed before standing. “I don’t want to be here anymore. The best thing is to go and fight ya?”

“And get yourself killed?” You snapped turning the chair away from him. “Sounds suicidal.”

Simon scoffed. “Come on y/n,” You heard his eyes roll. “It’s basically suicide staying here.”

You knew deep down he was right but fuck it made you so angry. You would have left with him, just school, your family. “I would have left with you.” You mumbled.

Simon sighed again, you heard his steps come behind you before turning you to him. “I’m sorry mate, I knew you would have but it’s a now solution.”

You sat there and thought for a moment before frowning. “When do you deploy?”

Simon frowned and looked away. “A week after graduation.”

You sighed before nodding. “Alright we have to make these last weeks worth it then.”

Simon nodded before laying on the bed. You turned the music up as you both jammed out to the song. It was both your favorites. One that you always played after school, during, before.

You don’t remember how you joined Simon on the bed. You felt his eyes on you, it was like a sixth sense feeling his stare. You looked over for him to be staring. “What?” You whispered.

Simon shook his head adjusting himself before moving to lean on his side. His arm supporting his head. “I wanna try somethin,” He began. “And when this happens I don’t want any thin’ to change yeah?”

You have him a confused look, he had a solid scare in his eyes. You just couldn’t pin point on what. “Okay?” You said doing the same motion.

He swallowed before nodding, his other hand grabbed your chin, with his index finger and thumb. Your eyes widened as he leaned in closer. You didn’t move, you couldn’t, all these years you dreamt of this. It was frown upon during this time, so you didn’t act on anything but here you are. About to kiss your best friend.

When he was inches from your lips, you could feel his breath hitting your lips. “I can stop.” He whispered as he looked at your eyes.

You didn’t say anything but crashed your lips to his. Simon was taken a back before he moved his lips with yours. You hummed into his mouth as both of your hands roamed each other, the music drowning the noise as your lips made noise. Simon pushed you down more into the bed as he straddled your hips, lips not leaving yours. You followed his actions playing with the hem of his shirt.

Simon groaned as he grind down into your pelvis. You felt his cock half hard and you knew damn well he felt yours. He moaned and stopped kissing you. “I-We can stop.”

You shook your head as you lifted your hips grinding back on him. His eyes rolled back and dropped his head. “I have been waiting for this Si.”

And just like that his lips went to your neck. It was like rabid teenagers (which you were.), you both ripped each others clothes off as he reached down to your cock, playing with the tip first. You moaned leaning in more, more friction.

“Needy aren’t ya,” Simon whispered his voice dropping another octave. “Didn’t know that you would be a needy one y/n.”

You glared up at his brown eyes, full of lust. You smirked. “Oh shut it,” He gripped harder and you sighed. “Please Simon do something.” You begged. BEGGED. You didn’t expect the whine that came out.

Simon chuckled. “Alright.” He kissed down your neck then your chest bitting and nipping as he went down. He licked your abdomen, staring right into your eyes. Your heart jumped more and more as he got closer and closer. Once his mouth was near your cock you held your breath. Are you both really doing this? This has to be a dream? This-

All the thoughts left as his mouth engulfed the tip of your cock, you sighed out as you watched him play with it with his tongue. You reached down to his blonde locks and rocked a small bit. “Fuck Simon.” You whispered as he hallowed his cheeks sucking more and more of you.

You never thought you would see Simon like this. Mouth full of your cock as his head bobbed up and down in a slow AGONIZING rhythm. It made you want to fuck his face, make more of a faster pace. His tongue flattened as he went up one last time before the rhythm changed. He light grabbed your balls as he set the pace.

You gasped your back arching. “Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes!” You said loudly bucking your hips up. His large arm snacked around your hips and he snapped you back down.

The noises were god amazing, anything you could have imagined. The ‘O’ that was made, you saw his silva and your cum mixed and it shot some fire twist that built in your stomach. You started panting hard as he moaned watching you squirm beneath him. “I’m gonna—.” You didn’t have to finished the sentence as he stopped shoving your cock down his throat. You dick twitch and your whole body felt tingly as your spurts of cum went down his throat.

You heard him growl. Growl with approval. Your body started to relax as you stared up at the ceiling. You felt him give one more suck, having you close your eyes and hiss. You felt him kiss up to you, you stared at him smiling. He smiled back kissing you. You tasted yourself on his lips.

You broke the kiss. “Mine turn.”

He froze before red plastered his face. “Uh,” You looked down and smiled. He came all over your bed. “I was rutting against you bed. Once you came I couldn’t hold back.”

You laughed as you kissed him. “There will always be next time. Right?”

Simon smirked kissing your cheek. “Well I don’t get deployed for a moment. So I think we have plenty of time. Got plenty of room to see how fast you can make me cum.”

Your face blushed and you rolled your eyes. “It’s on.”

Of course both of you would sometimes time each other to see how fast the both of you would cum faster. It was the best memories from high school that you would never forget. You may have never saw him again, even after he came back. However you’ll never forget your first time with Simon Riley.

[beamzar]

30th November 2023

Open entry: 00:02

Today was very regular.

My media lesson was atrocious, the people that were in charge of teaching us only thought to diss the topic and act like children.

After it though, me and my friends went to sign up at the gym and were given short instructions on how to use everything. Im going to start next week. I wanted to tomorrow but ive got nothing prepared, and i dont like being unprepared at all.

Ive already have a timetable for myself of when to use the gym, just for an extra sense of security.

Monday: 12:25 - 2

Tues: 12:25-1:25/2

Thurs: 10-11:30

Fri: ???

(Thursday and Friday ill have to bring extra things to use the showers so i dont stink)

Wednesday is my free day, to let my muscle regenerate and expand propperly and to hang out with friends.

I dont have a set rep system down yet but i have a general iverview of what to do each day. I think the gym is great tbh, but if i coukd id rather do some sport or anything that would let me build that muscle through activity rather than just gym. I dunno, ive always kept fit and have banger legs from hiking and walking alot in general, so i guess thats why.

Well anyway, psychology went fine aswell, we got to draw stick people in our books.

Form was alright aswell, we didnt learn anything, i just got to chat to my bsf about things before we got out and went to mine.

We also hung out with our friend for a bit and strolled around our school before they set off. Fun stuff.

We sat and chatted about various things, aswell as making boards for our friends, which was fun,had to rack my mind for stuff.

After she left i didnt rly do much exept for lie down. My legs have been killing me lately for no reason. Theyve been getting weaker, and i believe its just joint fatigue from the cold and also my low bpm. My fingers have been getting more and more stiff too, im actually finding it hella difficult to even type this whole thing out. Well,good news though, sickness is gone oretty much. My eyes arent killing me as much, although theyre still stinging and hurting all the time. I might just be severely dehydrated. I think im out of my depressive phase for now, i hope it stays away for as long as possible.

Thats it really. Have a good night.

Pinch punch first of the month no returns.

Close entry: 00:36

[shoichee]

ok hear me out. aomine x f!reader who’s on the tennis team and is amazing at it. for a while the reader and her team need to share the gym on the same days as basketball practice. during the days they share the gym aomine notices the reader. somehow aomine finds out the reader is also good at basketball, practically at aomine’s level. you can decide what happens!! it can be a head cannon or a type of one shot :)

I AM HEARING YOU OUT ANON, WE HAVE ANOTHER BANGER REQUEST THIS IS FIRE look inhale, what a genius, okay so i don’t play tennis myself, but I have a lot of friends who do... and trust me.... it’s a lot more exertive and difficult than what it appears to be

Aomine x f!Reader

[Headcanons]

if Aomine was a monster on the basketball courts, you were a monster on the tennis courts

the only reason why he hasn’t heard about you until he first saw you was because tennis tends to be not as a popular and broadcasted sport as basketball // the tennis games themselves are often single-player (doubles exist too but still less people on the same court) and relatively quiet with few audience members watching too

it was a MIRACLE that Aomine was there at the gym today (thank Wakamatsu for threatening to burn his porno mag), and luckily for him, he didn’t even had to practice as hard because the tennis club had an agreement with Touou’s basketball coach to occupy the other half of the gym

enter you, putting down your duffel bag and stretching before you do a few warmup tosses and hits against the gym wall while the nets were being set up

for the first half of practice, both sides were busy with their own practices, so Aomine hasn’t really noticed you

it was until the team got a break to catch their breath that Aomine noticed that the tennis team were still doing drills and practice matches; every single eye was drawn to you

Sakurai immediately comments on how your movements were too similar to Aomine’s, and Imayoshi is equally intrigued that you might as well be the tennis-version of Aomine

at the chatter, Aomine slightly perks up and looks to where everyone was pointing at (you), and quietly watches you while still looking “bored,” until he realized how right they were

your agility is top-notch and your instincts to immediately sprint to the right direction were insane; your change of pace from 0 to 10 in acceleration were even more seamless than Aomine’s at times, especially when you stand at a ready position and suddenly burst to the other side of the court to save the ball from the corner

not to mention you have your own fair share of trickshots and unpredictability in trying various ways to tire out your opponent in chasing after the balls you hit

Sakurai loudly wonders that if you played basketball, would you even be able to defeat Aomine?? and the entire team STARTS ANALYZING AND DISCUSSING amongst themselves and doing bets LMAO

Aomine’s impressed, but he’s still somewhat “meh” about it, since “the only one who could beat me is me” is still an attitude he carries around, and you do give off a vibe similar to Kise where you could easily copy techniques easily if you do play basketball other than tennis

little did Aomine know, you also noticed his exceptional skill with the ball and how he can do trickshots and dunks with ease… you turn to your friend and ask if that’s even possible

your friend stares incredulously at you and asks, “How do you not know? He’s one of the Generation of Miracles!”

of course you didn’t know if you’ve been focused on tennis all your life, but being in the sports world, the title of “Generation of Miracles” does ring a familiar bell

your friend (who’s also your partner during doubles matches) also plays a little bit of other sports on the side, including basketball, and during breaks, your friend would often ask you to play a small game together because seeing the Touou basketball team playing got them pumped up

your athletic ability would translate very easily into basketball, since having reflexes, agility, instincts, and change of pace would all be advantageous in sports that require mobility (just like how Koganei’s instincts from tennis were very useful in Seirin)

so whether or not you played basketball didn’t matter dramatically because you had skills and abilities that would be universally beneficial in most sports anyways

you always gave your friend a run for their money when you kept stealing their ball, did fast breaks, or pulled off agile maneuverings that no beginner player would be able to do, and whenever your tennis teammates did their “ooh’s” and “ah’s,” the basketball team would peer over to see what the commotion was about

they were LOSING their shit at how naturally talented you were at basketball, and Imayoshi has a bad great idea of inviting you over after practice to do some quick one-on-ones with Aomine for his own entertainment

Aomine is kind of excited if he was being honest, and his blood is kinda pumping and he’s a bit giddy to find a potential rival other than Kagami

Momoi is a little worried for you because Aomine might be a brute and hurt you, especially since you’re a girl, but she’s just as excited to see someone potentially knocking down his ego a shit ton if he loses

Momoi and Imayoshi both walk up to you on the last day of “shared” practice at the gym and ask if you can spare some time to do some one-on-ones with Aomine, and you agree because you don’t have much to do anyways

your friend is super excited for you but a little nervous at how you’re so casual in going against a GoM, but nevertheless, both the tennis and basketball teams are in the audience watching Momoi throwing up the jump ball (Aomine is giving you an arrogant smirk and you’re just standing there more focused on the ball than him LMAO)

as expected, Aomine easily grabs the ball (since he knows the rhythm in jumping for this a lot better) and immediately starts dribbling down the court at an inhuman speed, expecting a swift victory

nope, you immediately reacted to his speed and immediately cut off his drive when you’re right in front of him… and you immediately swiped for the ball, Aomine almost didn’t react fast enough to switch handles to escape your reach

but you immediately reacted and reach for his other dribbling hand and slap the ball away, and then you bolted with the ball down your court

Aomine is right behind you, shocked out of his wits, and everyone else is in HYSTERICS in the background

“HOLY SHIT, did you see that?!”

“(y/n), kick his ass!”

“Ho? Aomine, you’re letting her beat you so easily?”

“I knew those porn mags didn’t do anything good for him.”

“U-Um, Wakamatsu-san…”

Aomine thinks it’s a fluke that you got the ball from him, but he’s shocked because you weren’t exactly a Kise, and you even had a reaction time similar to Akashi’s on top of that

he tries to steal the ball back, but you did something unpredictable: using a similar movement when you hit the tennis ball with your racket, you slapped the ball to bounce (at an unfamiliar speed/rhythm) through his legs before you sprinted to dribble the ball in a normal drive again

shooting was a different story though because Aomine is always blocking your shots or stealing it before you can even get into a shooting position; after all, shooting requires use of muscles different to when playing tennis

even so, you made it equally hard for him to score

ultimately, Aomine’s superb shooting abilities expectantly made him won the short match, but he even had to resort to some crazy trickshots, so your reflexes would kick in slower than normal to register those shots

for those who have no clue about tennis (spoiler alert: me), a tennis racket is a lot more bulkier and heavier than it appears to be (much different than a badminton racket), and it takes a lot of arm strength to play with it very fluidly without wasting energy

thus, dribbling was easy for you, and your ball handling was pretty unique but still very hard to keep track of

now Aomine won, but everyone is losing their shit at the fact that you managed to get him to sweat so much and putting in effort (cue Wakamatsu and Imayoshi trying to recruit you to join as Aomine’s practice buddy to get the Touou ace to practice for once)

now, if it was a two-on-two match, you and your friend would definitely destroy Aomine and whoever would be unfortunate enough to be his partner (cough, Sakurai), for the sole reason that your impeccable teamwork in tennis doubles carries over to basketball matches, where Aomine has always been a solo star player

you damn know well that Aomine would constantly bug you to do one-on-ones with him, but he’s secretly whipped for you and doesn’t know how else to ask you to hang out with him other than a match LMAO

you do remind him that you’re a tennis player first, and you prioritize your team above all else; that means if there’s tennis practice, you’re going to those no matter what

that just reminded him of Kuroko (nostalgia, angst, and feels enter here)

he reluctantly shows up to watch your tennis practices along with Momoi because sleeping on the roof has gotten “boring,” and Momoi finds incentive in finding any techniques she can pick up from you to use for basketball strategies

he may have secretly watched your tennis matches, both singles and doubles

you definitely have watched Aomine’s matches, noticing there’s something odd with him at times, like he wasn’t trying his best like he did with you

after a heartfelt talk with Momoi, you do feel like he needs to get out of that mindset on his own, since his stubborn personality wouldn’t listen to you and you knew that from the amount of one-on-ones you played with him

then the Winter Cup came and Seirin won in their “revenge match” against Touou, and you were captivated by Aomine going ALL OUT in that match (you also took some notes to use for your own tennis matches)

Aomine drags both you and Momoi to buy some new basketball shoes after Touou’s loss, and from that point on, both of you are technically practicing basketball together, but like… you’re not complaining because you’re getting extra cardio in

you get better at basketball, enough to even beat him once in a blue moon in one-on-ones, but then he wins the rest of the matches against you tenfold LOL

Momoi loves you because you’re one of his main motivators to practice

when Aomine himself tries to play tennis singles with you, it’s quite hilarious to see him missing the tennis ball every time when he serves because it’s so TINY but it’s so heavy?? so it falls to the ground quite literally if he’s not precise in hitting it LOL

gauging distance between the net, back of the court, the ball, and his arm positioning is a nightmare for Aomine because he’s used to grand courts and GIANT distances and TALL hoops, and him being precise and meticulous in a much smaller area feels so restricting

of course you whoop his ass in tennis, that’s a given

give him some time though, he’d be really good at it really quickly once he adapts to his surroundings

bonus: Koganei FREAKS out seeing you in the Winter Cup in the audience because you’re a literal tennis legend, and the entire Seirin team is going ???? at him // he totally fanboys a bit and asks you to meet with his Seirin teammates, and you agree because you wanted to meet the team who gave Touou and Aomine a run for their money

you do one-on-ones with Kagami because you’re curious, and when Aomine hears of this… it’d be a CHAOTIC scene once he storms over to drag you away from Seirin

extra bonus: it’s not unusual to see you use your tennis racket to thwack him in the head when he gets any funny ideas of staring at your teammates’ shorts/tennis skirts or when he’s doing anything dumb in general

[farfromparker]

Too Busy Being Yours

Peter Parker x Avenger!Reader

NSFW

Part 2!

Summary: Peter’s had a crush on you since he moved into the Avenger’s compound. He heads down for training one morning and finds out he’s set to be your sparing partner for the next couple weeks. He also finds out he likes the feel of your hand around his throat. 

Warnings: smut, choking kink, sub!peter (Peter is 19!)

A/N: I’m a sucker for sub Peter/Tom so don’t be surprised if this isn’t the last piece like this I write. Also, Infinity War/Endgame? Not in this house!!

Word Count: 4k 

Peter walks into the training compound, gym bag slung over his shoulder and he already knows you’re here. Your tell tale training playlist blasting through the speakers and he finds himself humming along as he approaches the schedule. He slides his finger down the list until he finds today’s date. 

Oh. 

“Tony wanted us to be sparring partners for a couple weeks, said we could learn a few things from each other.” You raise your hands in air quotes over the last part. 

Peter swallows dryly… weeks? 

He looks over to you and watches as you remove your fingerless gloves, a light sheen of sweat coats your forehead. He can see your knuckles are red from where you've been hitting the punching bag. You’re gorgeous. 

“Right, sure?” He meant it as a statement but it comes out as a question. 

You elaborate, “He said I fight dirty and - well you’re obviously a lot stronger than me so,” you shrug. 

It makes sense, you can learn from each other instead of squaring up with someone that has a similar fighting style. On missions, people are going to do whatever they can to take advantage. It makes total sense. Peter’s just having a hard time thinking straight knowing he’s going to be fighting - wrestling with you - daily… for weeks. 

“Yeah, yeah, okay.” 

“C’mon Parker, I’ll take it easy on you,” you wink at him as you walk past. He bites his lip and falls in line behind you, trying his best to ignore how tight your leggings are around your ass. He fails. 

You stretch when you get to the mats, bending over and Peter drops his head, gym bag slipping off his shoulder and onto the ground. He kneels down and rummages through it for something - anything - to distract himself. He manages to just pull out a towel and set it aside. Nice Peter. 

You’re bouncing up and down now, springing up from the balls of your feet and shaking your arms. He catches your eye and you raise your eyebrows in a silent question. He rolls his shoulders as he stands and makes his way over to you, watching as you bring your hands up closer to your face. 

You circle each other at first as he dodges your first few strikes but makes no attempt to reciprocate. You huff, “You’re not gonna hurt me Peter, I’ve been shot before I think I can handle a broken rib or similar.” 

Peter’s eyes go wide “I’m not gonna break your ribs!”

You land a blow to his stomach and the air leaves his lunges in a rush. You smirk “I know.” 

His eyes narrow. He’s worked missions with you before but he’s never really seen you in action. Tony was right, you did fight dirty.

“That was cheap.” He murmurs, dodging another strike from you before grabbing your arm and flipping you to the ground. This time, it’s your eyes that go wide. “It won’t happen again.” He says leaning over you, smirking. 

He’s able to focus better after that, you aren’t the girl he’s been pining after since he moved into the tower, instead you’re an opponent with a smart mouth. 

9 out of 10 times he gets you pinned and you’re forced to restart but after the fourth round, you’re catching on. He leaves his left flank exposed when he follows through with a punch. You’re getting quicker now, dodging and striking at his weakness. He can feel his ribs bruising from it but the pain doesn’t compare to how much he’s actually enjoying fighting with you. 

He’s bantering with you, spitting smart remarks back in your face. You’re impressed, smirking and laughing and he’s proud he can stand toe to toe with you in that aspect. 

“Tap out” he taunts, you’re pinned underneath him, your wrists in his hands and you’re both panting. 

“No” you retort and he admires your fight. 

He’s about to continue on, count the ways he’s got you beat but before he can, you roll your hips up against him, planting your feet and throwing your weight upward. He’s caught off guard and you take advantage, ripping your hands free as you roll over top of him. 

It happens in the blink of an eye, he’s reaching to grab you back when suddenly your grip is on his throat, your hand tightens and his world shrinks. He gasps, squeezing his eyes shut and desperately tries to ignore the pull in his groin. 

“Fuck, Peter I’m sorry.” As quickly as it came, the pressure is gone. You release him and when he opens his eyes he can see the concern written across your face. You’re kneeling next to him now and he rolls towards you, propping himself up on his elbow. He scrubs a hand across his face. “I was just looking for something to get the upper hand and I didn’t - fuck - are you -“ 

“Y/n I’m fine. Hey, it worked didn’t it? You definitely won that round.” He tries to laugh it off but he can feel how hot his face is, cheeks stained in embarrassment. He hopes you just attribute it to the physical activity. 

“Are you sure you’re alright?”

He smiles and sits up “I’m Spider-Man, I’ve definitely been through worse.” 

You don’t look completely convinced but you let it slide. “Probably call it a day anyway, we’ve been here almost 2 hours now.” 

“Yeah, good idea.” He agrees, standing and walking over to his gym bag to get his water. 

You hesitate, drumming your fingers against your thigh before walking over to your own bag and flinging it over your shoulder. Peter can see small bruises blooming across your shoulder blades and he feels guilty. 

“Well, I’ll catch you around Parker.” 

“Yeah, see ya.”

He doesn’t really remember walking back to his quarters, his body went on autopilot as his mind went into overdrive. His fingers twitch against his side as F.R.I.D.A.Y. welcomes him back and opens the door. He could still feel your hand on his throat, feel your body on top of his, hear your labored breathing.  He drops his bag on the floor as the door shuts firmly behind him. He pulls his shirt over his head and throws it to the ground before sitting on the edge of his bed, head in his hands. He’s half hard, cock twitching in interest every time his mind plays it over again and he groans. Was this a thing now? He couldn’t distinguish if it was the feeling of your hand around his throat or simply the fact that it was you with your hand around his throat. He’d come to terms a long time ago that he’d be willing to do anything you wanted, if the opportunity arose (it hadn’t) but this - this is something he wasn’t prepared for. 

***

It’s really all downhill from there. His brain is a treacherous bastard and he dreams about you every night, on top of him, hand on his throat, grinding down on his cock. He wakes up sweaty and horny, or worse, already stained with cum. He’s 19 for fucks sake and he’s having wet dreams again like he’s pubescent. 

He has trouble focusing when he’s sparring with you. Mind hazy. You’re getting better no doubt but a couple of landed blows to the face later and Peter starts to weigh the options of a broken jaw or just telling you how he feels and facing complete and utter humiliation.

He walks in one morning some days later, having barely slept again and you’re already there, warming up. You always get there before he does. 

“Peter, I made a new playlist for us. I know you were getting sick of Post.” 

Peter smiles, “Nah, you always have the best playlists, I could never get sick of them.”

You smile brightly at him and point towards your phone, “Play it, I named it after you.”

He smiles, proud to have a playlist named after him on your phone. You’ve always been serious about your music and he likes to be associated with something that truly makes you, you. 

He glances at your phone and it unlocks, you had insisted on adding his face to your phone ID “in case of emergencies” and vice versa and it was another thing Peter was proud to have. Tony had been annoyed, huffing something about F.R.I.D.A.Y just being able to hack in anyway. You had laughed. 

He thumbs over to your music and selects playlists and he sees his name “Parker”…. followed by “Sex” and he stops breathing for a moment. His thumb hovers over the word. You had a sex playlist and he couldn’t stop himself from pressing it. Curiosity getting the best of him as he scrolls through the songs. How often did you listen to this playlist? Had you gotten off to this song? Or that one? Who were listening to this playlist with? 

“Find it?” You ask, startling him. 

“Uh yeah - you uh, you have a sex playlist?” He hates that his voice raises an octave towards the end. 

“Oh of course, don’t you?” 

Should probably have sex more than once to compile a playlist. 

You study him for a second before stepping into his space and scrolling through your phone while it’s still in his hands. “We can listen to it if you want to, there’s some bangers in here,” you wink at him as the music starts. You’re so fucking cool. 

A heavy beat starts out, easy to move to while a guitar strums along. He knows this song but knowing that you’ve possibly had sex to this song? Possibly had an orgasm to this song? It holds new meaning now. 

You square up to him, rolling your neck and he gets into a defensive stance. 

Have you got colour in your cheeks'

You strike first and he blocks, countering with a blow to your shoulder. You step back with a huff before getting back into position. He comes towards you but you dodge him easily, grabbing his wrist and twisting it up against his back. 

I dreamt about you nearly every night this week

He goes to move out of your lock but you hook your foot against his movement, catching him off guard. He tumbles to the ground, arms behind his back. It was sloppy and too easy. You both know it but he taps out anyway.  

(Do I wanna know?)

If this feeling flows both ways

(Sad to see you go)

Was sorta hoping that you'd stay

He can’t focus on fighting with this song in the background. He thinks he sees something different in your eyes as well but he can’t comment on it. Too afraid of the answer. 

Maybe I'm too busy being yours to fall for somebody new

You pin him again, straddling his waist this time and he could get out of it. He doesn’t want to though and he hopes you don’t want him to either. A moment of confidence (or stupidity) flows through him and he pulls his hand out of your grasp. You let him easily and he hears the slightest increase in your breathing. He grabs your wrist gently and carefully guides it to his throat. He can’t look you in the eyes anymore, opting to squeeze them shut rather than feel the weight of your gaze. He presses his lips into a thin line as he feels your fingers glide along his skin. 

“Peter..?”

“Please.”

Your fingers dig into the column of his throat and he whines, just a small noise but he knows your hear it. The blood has rushed to his cock and he knows you know. He can feel the heat and weight of you against him and he can’t stop himself from grinding up into you. 

You gasp, and for a moment he’s worried he’s popped this bubble you’ve found yourselves in, but you compose yourself quickly, rocking your hips back down against him and he can’t keep quiet any longer. 

“Y/n” he moans. 

The door to the training compound slams and you quickly pull your hand away from his throat, startled. Peter can’t bare to look at the door but he’s thankful you make no move to get off him, there’s no way he could hide how hard he is without you. He watches your eyes narrow and he has a pretty good idea of who has walked in. 

“Damn y/n, I think you win that round.” Sam’s voice echoes off the walls, somehow louder than the music. Peter has never wanted to kill someone more than right now. 

You flip Sam off as Peter sits up, giving you the cue that you can get off of him, as much as he absolutely does not want that. 

“I always knew she’d be the type to kick your ass in the streets and the sheets.” Bucky says and now Peter wants to die. If more people keep walking in it’s going to be extremely hard - pun intended - to get out of this situation without further damage to his ego. 

His gym bag slams against his shoulder and he looks up to see you looking back at him. Thank fuck. 

“Thanks.” He whispers, the double meaning not lost on you. 

“You only wish I’d whip your ass into shape Buck” the words roll off your tongue easily, almost like you didn’t just have you hand on Peter’s throat. 

“Dream about it every night darling, when you’re done with Peter let me know.” 

He’s joking, Peter knows that but the words sting all the same. 

“Keep dreaming soldier.” The music stops as you disconnect your phone. “C’mon Parker, I’m hungry.” 

Peter’s frozen in place, the sting easing in his chest. He had started coming to terms that this had been ruined, that you’d come back to reality and realized how ridiculous he is and that you’re definitely not interested… but you’re looking at him with that hint of something different he’d seen before. This isn’t over?

“Wait, Pete, shouldn’t you buy her dinner first?” Sam jabs. 

“Fuck off” he retorts, catching up to you quickly and Sam and Bucky are practically cackling but he doesn’t care anymore. Your hand is sliding down his arm as you walk out of the compound and they can joke all they want as long as you keep looking at him like that. 

You don’t say anything as you press the elevator button. The doors open and you both step on. Peter goes to press the ground floor button but you knock is hand out of the way, pressing the button for the top floor, where your quarters are located. 

“I’m not hungry for food Peter.”

He makes a pitiful noise, succumbing to the shift in the air. You have complete control in everything that happens moving forward and Peter couldn’t be more turned on.  

“Shh baby, soon.” You coo, running a hand up to scrape through his hair, tugging lightly and he moans again. “You’re so responsive… I love it. I can’t wait to find out what other noises I can pull from that pretty mouth of yours.” 

He’s positive if you had merely brushed against his dick he’d have cum. 

The doors open and he follows you like a lost puppy toward your room. Once inside, he drops his bag off to the side. He glances over towards you, suddenly extremely nervous.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y., active Red Hat protocol, please.”

F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s electronically polished voice sounds, “Activated.”

Peter’s brows furrow, “Red Hat?”

You walk toward him, sliding a hand underneath his shirt when you reach him, “We’re offline. Tony can’t send for us, no one can. And if he tries to override it, F.R.I.D.A.Y. will alert me while sending him down a rabbit hole. We’ll have about 5 minutes from her warning before Stark will force his way in again.” You’re smirking now, toying with the band of his boxers. 

“I’m so turned on right now.” Peter smiles, his tone is joking but he’s completely serious. You laugh, bright and loud. 

“Now, I believe we left off somewhere..?” You smirk, reaching a hand up to wrap around his neck, bringing him in for a kiss. He sighs into you, gripping your hips and pulling you in closer. His lips slip smoothly against yours, tiny noises raising from the back of his throat. 

Moving your hand back down his body, you push his shirt up, pulling away from the kiss as he removes it the rest of the way. He wants to keep kissing you but you have other ideas, pressing a thumb against his jaw to move his head and get access to his neck. He swallows thickly as your breath ghosts over his skin, bringing goosebumps to the surface. 

The silence is killing him and, hoping to distract himself from making more embarrassing noises, he starts talking. “I’ve wanted this for so long.”

Your lips press against his skin “I know.” 

Heat settles on his cheeks again but he can’t stop himself from continuing on, “You're amazing, and so sexy. I’ve been dreaming about you.” What?! Peter shut up. 

“Tell me about them.”

He bites his lip, cock throbbing as you open your mouth against his neck, tongue meeting skin. 

“They’re - uh you’re - you have your hand on my throat….” he feels like the rest of the picture should paint itself, you basically acted the rest of it out down in the training compound. 

You’re not satisfied though, humming before your teeth scrape against his neck. He hisses “F-fuck y/n.”

“There has to be more to your dreams, Peter.”

Suddenly, your hand is on his cock, squeezing through the fabric of his joggers and he throws his head back, hitting the wall hard but he barely feels it. The moan that falls out of his mouth sounds pornographic but he’s in no mind to be embarrassed. 

“Y-yes, there's more. You’re on top me, riding me and I - uggghhh.” 

He can feel your lips curl into a smile, feel the pressure of your fingertips on his hips as you push his joggers and boxers down his legs. He kicks out of them as you step away, his body instinctively wanting to follow your heat. Stupidly, he wants to cover himself because you’re still fully clothed and he’s standing there, naked and hard, shy under your gaze. “Lay down Peter.” Your voice is soft, like you can see how vulnerable he feels. 

Peter’s head is swimming, “Right, yeah.” 

He settles down against the pillows and watches as you strip naked. He eyes you hungrily, every curve and fine line of muscle, every scar and mole. He wants to touch you everywhere. He reaches down and squeezes the base of his cock to relieve some pressure. You tsk as you walk toward him “Hands off.” And he immediately let’s go, settling instead on your thighs as you straddle him, wet cunt slipping against his cock and he sees stars explode as his eyes slide shut. 

“Holy shit.” He moans, squeezing your legs, wanting nothing more than to rut up against you. 

“I said,” you grab his wrists and pull them away from your body, “hands off.”

He whines, but does as you command, reaching his hands up and gripping the metal of your headboard. You cock your head, “Don’t break my headboard, I’m kind of fond of it.”

A small laugh slips past his lips, “I’ll do my best but - ughh,” you rock against him, “no promises.”

You lean down over him, lips finding his and he opens his mouth to yours. Your hands slide up his stomach, fingernails leaving small red trails in their wake. You brush against his nipples, earning a small noise from him before your right hand reaches his neck. You pull away, kissing the side of his mouth before pulling back to look in his eyes. He’s flushed, lips shiny and pupils blown.  

“You’re gorgeous Peter.”

He smiles, a deeper flush settling on his cheeks, “You’re more gorgeous.”

You smirk back, “Always the flatterer, but back to that dream you’ve been having.” Your fingertips ghost along his throat. 

He groans, fingers flexing into your headboard. He ruts up against you, cock dribbling precome against his stomach, “Y/n, please.”

“Oh Peter,” your hand clasps around this throat gently, fingertips applying pressure and you slide along his cock. Cockhead rubbing against your clit. You squeeze gently before releasing him, and he sighs, fixing his gaze back on you. 

“More, please.” 

“So polite,” you coo. “And you’ll get more baby boy, but first.” You reach over him and into your nightstand, pulling out a condom. He releases the headboard, intending to take the condom from you but you rip it open with your teeth, cocking an eyebrow at him. His mouth pops open slightly before you kneel up over him, taking his cock in your hand and rolling the rubber down his length. 

You grab his wrists and guide them back to the headboard, “Final warning, Peter. I’ll have to punish you if it happens again.” As much as he doesn’t want to disobey you the thought of what your punishment could entail has his cock twitching. 

Suddenly you’re sinking down on his dick and he whines, “Fuck, oh fuck, please.” He can hear your moans as well, mixing in the air with his noises. Your hand comes back up to his throat, placing your grip on the skin there. You don’t squeeze, opting to just feel the hammering of his heartbeat under your fingertips. 

You’re riding him now, grinding down on him whenever your thighs meet his hips. He can’t stop himself from flexing up into you, “So good, oh fuck - you feel so good.”

“Peter,” you gasp, “need you, touch me.” 

He’s quick to get his hand on your lower stomach, feeling your muscles quiver with each movement. His thumb finds your clit after some mild fumbling and you groan as he starts to rub it. 

“Mmm so good.” You moan, opening your eyes to look down at him. You squeeze gently around his neck and there’s another sharp prick of arousal in his groin. He thumbs at your clit quicker now, the pressure on his neck and cock are catching up with him but he doesn’t want to finish before you do. 

You let go of his throat as you lean back, his cock rubbing up against that spot that has your thighs trembling. He reaches his free hand up to palm at your breast, rolling a nipple between his fingers, mesmerized as you move on his cock. Your walls clench around him and he bites his lip. “Fuck sweetheart, not gonna last much longer with you doing that.” He grits out. 

You moan, “That’s the point baby boy.” 

His hips begin to stutter underneath you and you knock his hand off your clit to replace it with your own. Watching you touch yourself while fucking yourself on his cock is what sends him over the edge. He reaches down for the covers laying underneath him, having enough mind to stop himself from bruising you. He comes loudly, cock pulsing inside you as he pushes his head back into the pillow, exposing his neck to you. He’s riding out his orgasm when feels you flutter around him, overstimulated as a sting of pain mixes with pleasure. 

You’re moaning his name, milking your climax for all it’s worth and his stomach clenches as his cock spills a few final drops of cum into the condom. 

You collapse on top of him, heaving and sticky with sweat. You hum, placing a kiss along his collarbone before raising your head to look at him. You smile at him, “Way better than any fantasy.” 

He sputters, “You’ve been…? You fantasize about this? About me?” 

You place a quick kiss to his lips before lifting yourself off of him. “You thought it was a coincidence that you came across my sex playlist?” You ask as you wink, disappearing into the bathroom. 

Peter smiles to himself, then “Wait, this wasn’t a one a time thing, right?” Does he sound a little desperate and a lot hopeful? Yes. 

He hears you laugh through the thin wall. “Don’t worry about that baby boy, I have a lot of plans for you.” 

***

Tony squints at the screen. The coding where your room is - where your room should be - is gone. He rubs a thumb along his chin. 

“What’s got you so deep in thought?” Bruce asks as he walks around him. 

“Hm? Oh no, nothing. Y/n and spidey have just disappeared.”

“Oh yeah? Good for them, it’s about time.”

“Yeah, yeah right. Good for them.”

Bruce raises an eyebrow at him, studying Tony over the top of his glasses, “You can’t figure out how to bring them back online.”

Tony scoffs, “Of course I can, but what kind of mentor would I be if I cockblocked the kid?”

Bruce laughs, “Keep telling yourself that Tony.”

[pokekill-myself]

Pokemon anime openings and marketing energy through the years.

Indigo league- The energy was Pokemania. All about Gotta catch em all. the Gen 1 anime was all about shilling gen 2

Pokemon theme song: an absolute Earworm that used the catch phrase of the series that DEFINED A WHOLE GENERATION: "Gotta catch em all" wrapped in a high energy banger.

Pokemon World: Huge 90's party song energy with a hook that sits dormant in your brain until it plays.

Johto- The energy of begging the flame not to die out.

Pokemon Johto: Sells out the series by being the best opening. A pop rock banger singing about the general vibe of gen 2. It's a whole new world but ya still gotta catch em all and be the best that you can be.

Born to be a winner: the energy of the first opening trying to recapture the earworm energy.

Believe in me: This contributed to the generation long desire for fans to see Ash win. He loses to a Blaziken and Kecleon this gen.

Hoenn- The flame has died but it doesn't matter. Pokemon will keep moving

I wanna be a hero: A protagonist being the protagonist song

This dream: the dream is being good enough to beat the gyms and league

Unbeatable: to be fair Ash was pretty good this gen, not unbeatable but pretty good. The themes are just Pokemon mood energy at this point.

Battle Frontier: Maybe the real treasure was the Pokemon the series Ruby and Sapphire Battle Frontier we found along the way.

Pokerap GS Chronicles theme: They reuse the Gen 2 Pokerap they never used

Sinnoh- Vague themes about various shit then they say the title of the season.

Diamond and Pearl: The rock music stops here. Now all the themes are Dadrock or soft rock acoustic guitar. The opening no longer matters beyond the 30 seconds you hear it before an episode.

We will be heroes: Soft rock. Destiny, changing the world and friendship.

Battle Cry (STAND UP!): Dadrock. Paths, heart, friendship and unity

We will carry on!: dadrock. IT'S ABOUT SELLING YOU ON GENERATION FOUR DIAMOND AND PEARL SINNOH LEAUGE VICTORS POKEMON!

Unova- much like the games the anime also pretends this is a blank slate IP

Black and White: softrock. The songs may matter again but man is this a downgrade to the japan opening to Pokemon: Best Wishes where the visuals would update episode to episode. Like holy fuck that was cool.

Rival Destines: softrock. Friendly rival the song. Hau, Hop, Bianca, May, Barry, Trace, Marnie. All of them are symbolized in this song.

It's always you and me: softrock. holy shit I regret thinking of this idea now. FUCK THESE OPENINGS OH MY GOD!

Kalos- A sort of return to form with a massive build up. Ash had the best team to date.

Pokemon theme: A shitty version of the original opening. Trying to recapture lightning. Hell In japan Kalos had some banger openings, at least it's not some light song about friendship, destiny and paths.

Be a hero: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Mega Volt: So anyway they do a remix of the first opening of XY, a Mega version if you will. It just encapsulates the energy of gen 6 and how much of a banger this season is. Hmmm what? We're moving on to XYZ? You know I'm still mad how Zygarde got fucked over. Kalos was a pretty good region.

Pokemon XYZ by Rica Matsumoto: This song has anime opening that plays during hero moment energy and I love it.... what do you mean that's the Japanese opening? Stand tall? Sounds like a shitty imagine dragons? Dude I don't know what you're talking about. So anyway THEN THEY MAKE A VERSION FOR THE OST WITHOUT LYRICS FOR GRENINJA'S BATTLE BOND FORM CHANGE IT'S SO COOL!

Alola- these openings all have "i want to sound Hawaiian but don't really care" energy.

Journeys- I hate how close this season is to everything I want out of a Pokemon anime. Slice of life, avoids the core story like a deathly virus in 2020 and a character based on the core tenant of Pokemon "Gotta catch em all". All we're missing is getting rid of Ash and having him be a battle at the league.

The Journey starts today: modern Pokemon commercial trailer energy. you know what i mean.

[genesisrose74]

Karasuno Boys Singing Headcanons!

A/n: By this point I hope that everyone has seen the masterpiece that is Sugawara’s wonderful voice actor singing Under the Sea, which has won the spot in my heart for cutest thing I’ve ever heard. I then proceeded to go off the deep end of Haikyuu voice actors singing and safe to say I was in no way disappointed, so here’s some Karasuno boys singing headcanons! If you have any requests my ask box is open 💖 enjoy!

Daichi

Is it just me or would Daichi not care if someone heard him singing

He seems like the type of person who hums all the time 

Partly because it helps relax him after yelling at the team all day LMAO He doesn’t necessarily sing with lyrics every chance he gets, but when he does he’s pretty casual about it

He’ll sing in the car a lot, and it was actually the first place you heard him

Boy has a soothing playlist for school days and you always like hearing his voice when he drives you in the mornings

Will hum when you’re both doing schoolwork in his or your house

Doesn’t realize he has a good voice, so he never tries to show off all that often in front of people and thus the team has not heard him full out sing yet

So when they does hear him like, actually singing for the first time at the end of practice they’re SHOOK

Tanaka and Nishinoya instantly start spamming you with texts, asking why you hid away such a precious secret for so long

You’re sitting in the library staring at your constantly vibrating phone like ??? doesn’t he sing all the time?

When you end up texting the boys this question they go absolutely feral

At this point Daichi is losing his voice yelling at the team to calm tf down

Suga is cackling in the corner of the team gym cause he been knew

It’s absolutely chaotic literally someone come save Daichi please-

Sugawara

HAHA GET READY BOYS

Official team mom of Karasuno sings all the damn time don’t even get me started

Always humming some upbeat tune doing schoolwork, cleaning up after practice, in the car, etc.

Seriously when is this sweet baby not singing

The team is well aware of this, especially the sideline cheer squad (Yamaguchi, moi ippon nice serve!) 

Tell me he does not make up rhyming cheers under his breath during matches I dare you

Will literally make up a stupid song on the spot to describe whatever he is currently doing or feeling

Hinata bathroom vibes tbh but it’s even more out of the blue

“Got an A on my exam today, and things are going my way”

“Suga, for the love of everything please stop”

“Daichi thinks I’ll listen to what he’ll say, but I’m singing more anyway”

He is always on board with karaoke whenever Karasuno has team bonding nights

One time you are invited to this by Suga himself and he gets up and starts singing a Disney song haha guess which one 

And as often as the team has heard him sing mans is feeling it tonight for whatever reason and y’all can tell

You have never heard anyone sing Under the Sea so passionately before but it’s a gift and you’re not complaining

Asahi

Boy is so insecure oh my gosh please give him some support

Very shy about singing in front of anyone and everyone

The only time you’ve ever heard him sing was when you were over at his house and he was taking a shower

You had gone downstairs to get a snack from the kitchen and when you come back up he’s singing alongside one of his playlists

You don’t know if it’s because of the steam and the solid acoustics in the bathroom but he doesn’t sound half bad

You try not to startle him as soon as he gets out because you know how flustered he’d get

But then a while later while y’all are studying on his bed you just casually bring it up like ‘You have a nice voice, Asahi’ and that’s all

He’s a little shocked at first that you heard him but kind of smiles and sighs in relief because you liked his singing!! 🥺

Precious teddy bear is totally happy for the rest of the week, like that’s how much your praise means to him sdlkgjfdjsof he’s too cute

Eventually warms up to humming little tunes around you

He’s really blushy when he does but you pretend not to notice for his sake lmao

It makes you so warm inside that he feels comfortable enough to let you hear him

Ennoshita

In this house we do not sleep on Ennoshita

As much as he is the mom of the second years he will flaunt his stuff whenever he gets the chance and this is one of those times

If a generic pop song is on at literally any point in time and he hears it, damn right he’s going to sing 

When it comes to singing Ennoshita is hands down the most chaotic no question about it

Sometimes he’ll actually sing a verse pretty decently

And then the next line is just the embodiment of a dumpster fire and he does not care

These are the only times that Tanaka and Noya get irritated with him and not the other way around

But Ennoshita doesn’t give a shit, he’s so cheeky

Like he’ll be walking through the mall and a banger of a song like Fergalicious comes on over the speakers? You’re done for

Even if he doesn’t know the lyrics at certain points, or deadass does not know any of them at all, he’ll just power through

If there is a sports banquet complete with dancing and music and the team attends, Ennoshita is tearing up the floor and singing his heart out

Honestly you’re a little scared to interfere cause what is he even doing-

He has made quite a few friends from opposing teams with his frankly lunatic level energy

I’m looking at you Oikawa, Tendou 

Tanaka

ANIME. INTROS.

He sounds EXACTLY like that opening singer from Bungou Stray Dogs I wonder why

No but actually we all heard his little song in season one, when he’s late and walking to the gym like what a king-

In summary he is a pretty good singer 

Most definitely a frequent participant during team karaoke nights and everyone enjoys his little performances

When he realizes that girls actually like guys who can sing he starts using this to his advantage 

And surprisingly it ended up working

You’re out at karaoke with some friends one night and you hop outside to get some more food for your group when you hear somebody slaying Rough Diamonds; your mind instantly goes to Food Wars

It catches your interest and then you realize...this dude goes to your school? You are positively whipped

He sees you from the doorway and when he realizes you’re enjoying the song he amps it up another three notches

Achievement get: girlfriend 

Karaoke dates and other such outings happen often, thank you very much

As much as he enjoys singing he does not overdo it like Ennoshita, who has been limited to three songs per night every time the group goes out, please for the sake of everyone’s eardrums

Nishinoya

As Tanaka’s best friend and as the co-president of simps everywhere, Nishinoya is another common singer during karaoke nights

Having fun and maybe picking up a cute girl at the end of it all? That’s literally his life agenda

He either goes for the badass, headbanging songs that are super energetic, or he jams out to the generic and famous pop groups’ songs

There is no in between

Noya has a slightly deeper singing voice but sometimes he’ll go for the stupid high notes for fun and just...completely fails

The fact that he has never successfully hit one of those notes doesn’t deter him in the slightest though; his goal is to get there at least once before he dies

He can sing so many popular TikTok audios and you can’t decide whether to be impressed or slightly disappointed with that fact

Noya doesn’t really sing at practice just because he’s focused, but when he’s walking home or getting food from Sakanoshita afterwards he might start randomly singing something

The type of person who has like a billion different playlists on his phone for the most obscure moods (honestly same Noya)

Like there’s one named “Bad Test Grade But I Won a Free Popsicle Kind of Feeling” don’t even ask 

Will put on a concert in his room and perform a whole lineup of these songs for you

Sometimes you think it’s just so he can avoid doing schoolwork but you let him get away with it occasionally

cause you’d never tell him but it’s so entertaining and kinda hot what

Tsukishima

OH GOD THIS BOY

I swear you have tried time and time again to figure out whatever the hell kind of music he listens to with those chonky headphones of his but you have never successfully completed that mission

There are only two - count em, TWO - instances where you have ever witnessed this embodiment of a salt shaker doing anything resembling singing

Number one was a literal meme TikTok where you were using Beyond the Mysterious Beyond from Land Before Time as your audio

You didn’t expect Tsukki to recognize it at all 

But he’s in the top corner of your phone screen and he is deadass LIP SYNCING EVERY WORD and you’re SENT INTO ORBIT 

DOES HE STUTTER? NOPE

Should have expected that Mr. Dinosaur Obsessed would have watched Land Before Time and loved the all the bops

That video is forever saved in your drafts because he’d literally end you if that went public but you refuse to completely get rid of it

Second time, our french fry child actually sings because Yamaguchi forces him to do a song with him lmao

It only lasts for about three verses but it’s all anyone has heard from him before and is therefore a blessing from above

If anyone has heard these two singing Sarishinohara on YouTube you know what I’m talking about if not look it up it’s an absolute gift 

Literal perfection in a duet like?? Everyone is depressed when they realize that Tsukki’s voice had been hidden from the world until that very moment

We will cherish this short taste of Singing! Tsukki for all time amen 😔🙏

Yamaguchi

Like Asahi, this precious bean is also shy about his singing 

But he will sometimes get a burst of confidence if he’s having a really good day or if someone is singing with him

When those moments arrive they are wonderful 

He sounds like an angel, not even exaggerating he’s just so pure

Has a very light tone no matter how the song originally sounds and it’s really soothing to be honest

When his little bouts of confidence wear off please for the love of God praise him in any way shape or form, it makes him feel good about himself 

On team bus rides to games, he and Yachi will sometimes sing fun tunes together to calm each others’ nerves and it’s incredibly precious

Tsukki will send you videos of this pregame ritual and you have a folder reserved for them in your camera roll 

Everyone say thank you Tsukki

He will sing for you if you’re feeling super down about something because he knows you love it 

Never fails to calm you down and cheer you up, and Yams knows in those moments that he would gladly sing for the rest of his life if it made you smile

We stan one soft, talented bean sprout 

Kageyama 

Another stubborn boy when it comes to singing in front of other people

He will hum on rare occasion but don’t expect much more

You start to realize that whenever he does start humming, though, it’s always the same song, so one day you ask him about it

It’s a song his grandfather used to sing to him when he was little and he uses it to calm himself down

You almost start crying on the spot because you know how much his grandpa meant to him 

Kags says there were lyrics to it but he doesn’t remember them besides a few random words scattered here and there

It becomes your personal mission to find the rest of the lyrics because you’ll be damned if your precious baby goes another day without hearing them again

Finally after countless obscure Google searches you find the song 

But you don’t know how to casually bring up the fact that you had spent hours obsessively looking for them into a conversation-

So one day you’re hanging out with Kageyama, but he’s been in an awful mood all week, and you decide to start singing the song that his grandpa used to but including the lyrics

And when he recognizes the words and puts the chorus together, he instantly relaxes and starts singing it with you

He is so touched and thankful that he can finally recall the song in its entirety, and now you both sing said song to each other whenever the other is feeling down

I love him so much my heart-

Hinata

When you find out he can sing you’re absolutely floored

Literally the only time in his life that Hinata can successfully speak English words and it’s in a song? And it’s coherent?? It’s a miracle

The whole team gets on his ass about sucking at English in class but being able to obliterate those lyrics when they come up in a song and the poor tangerine gets all huffy

hE’s tRyiNg HiS bESt oKaY                

His range is SO GOOD THOUGH WHAT-

You’re in the middle of a store with him and he’s been occasionally singing along to the music from the speakers and at this point you’re not even surprised at how good he sounds

But then he just starts singing in falsetto

BOI- When I say your jaw is on the floor I am not playing games 

The power he holds is beyond comprehension

He’s looking at you confused like did he do something wrong?

When you proceed to flip out over how great he just sounded baby gets so embarrassed how cute

Again, one of those people who just doesn’t know their gift and it makes him even more precious 

I would kill to have his capabilities like imagine the talent; if that whole volleyball thing doesn’t work out there’s also the music industry sir-

In conclusion: CAN SOMEONE PLEASE GET THIS SUNSHINE A MIC THANK YOU

[paradise-creator]

Hellooo!! I love love LOVE the diamond box matchup you did!! You're amazing!! Your blog is incredible!! Now I'm here for a romantic haven box Haikyuu matchup pls🥺

Appearance: My name is Kay! She/her, black, straight, 5'1, I have a slightly athletic & curvy-ish figure (lol idk), short-ish hair(like mid-neck), dark brown eyes, shoe size 9, I like to dress comfy so I'm always in oversized hoodies, sweatpants, sneakers, sweatshirts and shorts. I like colorful clothes too, high waisted jeans and shorts and boots. I'm not very fashionable but I try lol.

Personality:

Basics: infp-t, Hufflepuff, Taurus sun, scorpio moon, sanguine, chaotic good, ambivert.

Some positive traits: I'm optimistic, friendly, energetic, organized, enthusiastic, observant, happy, open-minded, loving, encouraging and inquisitive!!

Some negative traits: I'm annoying, perfectionist, insecure, forgetful, easily distracted, kinda lazy, argumentative, too nice at times and clingy.

I love learning new things!! Currently I'm learning Korean, how to draw, how to paint and songs on the saxophone.

When I'm up for it, I love fun physical activity!! Going for a hike, going to the gym, bungee jumping, mountain climbing, going camping and etc :D

Although I love going out, nothing beats lazy days at home. I can spend hours by myself and still be happy. When alone I usually sleep or watch a movie/anime or practice my drawing or saxophone or try and learn something new!

I have a horrible memory and can never remember important dates 😭 I've forgotten my own birthday a few times (rip) so people can get mad at me for missing appointments, forgetting birthdays and other important days. I try my best to organize everything necessary on my phone calendar so I can be reminded.

I love seeing people happy! Nothing can fulfill my day more than knowing I put a smile on someone's face! I usually try my best to help out anyone who needs it and to the best of my ability! This has led to me getting taken advantage of in the past but I can't help but try and make others happy. I've developed a thicker skin and some trust issues as I've grown up because of it.

I love hyping my friends/family up!! Do you need a boost in confidence? Here I am, ready to help you remember the absolute king/queen/royalty that you are!! I'm usually very energetic and enthusiastic about many things and I love spreading positivity around!!

My love language is physical touch! So touch is very important to me in my relationships. Though I am insecure so I tend to think that I smother the people I care about with too much affection idk lol. I live for hugs and cuddles and hand holding 👉🏿👈🏿 but because of that I feel like I'm very clingy and annoying skskfksjd

I'm introverted in nature so although I mean usually full of energy and love making new friends, I can't do it for too long lol. My social battery runs out really fast and I have to hide away and recharge before I can be fully social again, otherwise I won't be my best self. I treasure personal time and understand when people need time for themselves too.

I love spontaneity!! I love living in the moment and doing stuff just for the hell of it!! Wanna go on a road trip? Dance in the rain? Build houses for charity? Go to McDonald's at 2am? Go on a long walk? SIGN ME UP!!

I can also be lazy and unmotivated to do stuff. If something doesn't interest me, I'd find myself incapable of doing it or I'd do it with great difficulty. I'm one of those 'do something when inspiration/motivation hits you otherwise it'll be absolute shit' types.

But when I do have motivation/inspiration that's when my perfectionism comes in and I have to do it in the best possible way and anything less is an insult to me, my family, my ancestors and descendants lmaoo. Unfortunately I subconsciously set a very high bar for myself which can be overwhelming and stressful but when I manage to produce work of that quality, it's very satisfying and rewarding jshkshdhsj

I have more to add but I feel like this is getting way too long 💀 lemme just move to the next section heheheh

Hobbies: I LOVE listening to music, learning new things, watching movies/anime, sleeping, reading, writing, playing saxophone (I'm still learning tho lol), swimming, drawing, journaling, making friends, and cooking!

My music taste: any type of rock (punk rock, grunge, j-rock, metal), pop, KPOP, RnB, jazz, dubstep, lofi hip hop, rap, trap, krnb, anime OP's and bangers from: Elvis, the beach boys, Queen, Khalid, Ateez, Harry styles, Kendrick Lamar, p!atd, mcr, fallout boy, Nirvana, BTS, mxmtoon, Marianas trench, twenty one pilots, stray kids, Jay Park, crush, Dreamcatcher, Skrillex, MJ, troye sivan etc

Fun facts:

I'm more of a cat person but I live dogs and think they're adorable!!

I have four piercings and I plan on getting more soon!!

I'm a night owl, and get super grumpy in the mornings especially when woken up unexpectedly >:/

Although I love making friends, I only have like 1/2 super close friends and like 20+ acquaintances lol

I want to get a tattoo soon but idk what to get :(

I'm super addicted to coffee (rip) and if I don't take some for some time (like a week) I'll get the worst migraines and I won't feel better until I drink some coffee 😭

That's it!! I hope i wrote enough stuff!! Did I leave anything out? If you need more pls tell me and I'll send another ask :D Take your time!! I'm in no rush. I'll patiently wait even though you get writers block or have a large amount of asks 😌 pls stay safe and healthy!! Drink lots of water, sleep well and have an amazing day/night!! 💙✨

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Hello and Welcome my Starlight!

The Haven box includes:

- Match up

- Sun drop

- Journal of Feelings

- 3 am shenanigans

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

I'd match you up with

Sugawara Koushi, Vice-captain of Karasuno

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

Sun drops

- OKAY so like, as I read your description I thought of Akaashi or Yaku or Sugawara

- Me being the indecisive author I am had trouble picking

- But then I remembered that you loved to do spontaneous things.

- And that's when I realized that Sugawara is THE ONE

- You two would be deemed the "3 am couple"

- Or in the team it would be "Epitome of Chaos"

- He takes care of you

- He will alway remind you that you don't need to be perfect

- Insecurities? BE GONE

- Nagativity? BE GONE

- That's basically his motto

- He is both your mom and partner in Crime

- did I mention he will take care of you?

- CUDDLES AND KISSES FOR DAYS

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

Journal of feelings

- Once this man realizes that you LOVE physical affection. He will give it to you. EVERYTIME HE SEES YOU

Kay entered the gym to watch her boyfriend play. She tried sneaking in and so far it has been great. She thought she was off the hook but then felt a familiar arms wrapped around her waist. "I found you~" Sugawara said with a smile.

- You both would often plan pranks and majority of the times, it would succeed

"Okay okay, so what are we doing today?" Kay asked the silver haired male. "Oh~ maybe we can scare Asahi or anyone for that matter with a beetle?" Sugawara suggested. "That's--no," Kay responded.

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

3 am shenanigans

It’s 3 am in the morning. Almost everyone is fast asleep or in their homes, well almost. The night sky is littered with diamond in the sky. The streets were silent but it was comforting. A few people walked here and there. And a few cars passes by there and here. “What are we doing up so late?” A silver haired man said as he yawned. “We’ll be going to Mc Donald’s! What else?” The female responded as she smiled at him. “Is it even open at this time?” He asked. “Koushi, darling, it is open,” Kay, the lover of our beloved silvered male man said as she smiled. Sugawara chuckled and held her hand, the smile on his face was evident. “You know, we should be sleeping by now right?” He said as he pulled her closer. “And so what? I wasn’t planning on sleeping early! I slept the whole day yesterday and missed the chance to hang out with you,” The girl responded.

A small blush appeared on the male’s face and he giggled. “That’s very sweet bu-“ He was about to say but was silenced by the girl. “That was very sweet but we could’ve done this later on or tomorrow. Well, sorry to break it to you, Love. But, we are here,” She said as she pulled the male inside the fast food chain. And soon enough, the two got their orders and enjoyed their meal. “I don’t know why but this hits different,” Kay said as she eat a French fry. “It really does. Especially since you are here,” Sugawara stated as he patted her head. Now, she was the one blushing. As the two chatted, the other customers and staff glanced at them every now and then. None of them were annoyed at their interactions. On the contrary, they enjoyed watching them,

Some felt envious of their relationship. Some dreamt to have something like that. And others remembered the times of old. The two were so sweet, it’s almost too much. Laughter and chattering echoed through the building from both the couple and the people around them. Then they were dub the “3 am couple” as the two would often venture in that restaurant at 3 am in the morning.

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

Author's note

I'm so so sorry for the long wait! This week has been hectic. Anywho, I hope you enjoy this matchup~ and thanks for requesting!

[lantur]

Work had me bored af and irritated (combination of boredom and other employees emailing me about dumb shit I absolutely don’t care about and therefore requiring that when I reply, I will have to pretend to care) today. I was cranky before I went to the gym and I was like “I’ll just do an easy run,” but I ended up channeling all of my restless/irritated energy into activity, and I was really feeling my music today. I ended up running 4.37 miles without stopping, close to the personal best I’ve run (which was 4.6 miles last summer, I believe), and more impressively, I stayed above 6.0 mph the entire time, hovering between 6.0 - 6.3 mph. That’s faster than my usual pace of roughly 5.8-5.9 mph. 

The music that inspired today’s workout: 

The Phoenix, Fall Out Boy

Remember the Name, Fort Minor (**all time fave, 14 years old and still a banger)

The Fighter, Gym Class Heroes (**all time fave, one of the best inspirational tracks I’ve ever heard, especially for people who are going through mental health struggles or other life challenges.)

Radioactive, Imagine Dragons

Believer, Imagine Dragons

I’m So Sorry, Imagine Dragons

Thunder, Imagine Dragons

Winner, Jamie Foxx

Flawless (Remix), Beyonce & Nicki Minaj

Let’s Get it Started, Black Eyed Peas

Side to Side, Ariana Grande & Nicki Minaj 

If you have any favorite tracks to run to, please let me know! 

[thoughtfulnessme]

13/02

So its Saturday and this morning my body decided to wake me up at 5AM. I tried getting back to sleep, didn’t work so I got up at like 6:15Am. But it’s good.  i think I’m going to start going to the gym in the mornings bc in the afternoon I’m so drained and hungry, I just never end up going.

A few weekends ago, P and I went away to celebrate our 4 year anniversary. We took P’s mum Mercedes sprinter van that she has fully decked out and stayed at Fingal Heads. The carvan park was right on the beach, it was a one minute walk down to the water and we could here the waves at night. We stayed for 2 nights and it was really fun. The beach hardly had anyone on it, one night we even had sex on the beach. We went for some walks, P did some fishing, we went out for breaky and dinner and it was just really nice to switch off for the weekend and just relax.

Last w/e I caught up with my friend G and it was really nice seeing her. last night we also went out together and had a few drinks and listened to a live band that played absolute banger tunes. I feel like I am starting to be more myself around her and I really enjoy spending time with her.

During the week my old house mate also messaged me if I wanted to hang out this weekend. It felt really nice that she messaged me bc the other week I felt really down and like I always put in with effort with me and I just wanted people to message me so I would know that they actually want to hang out with me. So when she messaged me it made me feel really happy. I’m so glad I have a couple of friends here now that I can see every now and again because for so long I went through a period where I was so lonely and had no one.

So I am going to see her for breaky this morning which should be lovely and then P and I have our valentines day lunch tomorrow and today we also need to finalise our invites for our wedding!

Work has been pretty slow and bc we only have one car I can’t just leave and finish early when all my work is done but I am acting up until the end of April which is really good. I need to do a job app for a job that has been advertised and somewhere I have always wanted to work. I will get the job.

[the-hero-of-queens-blog]

Too Far - A Peter Parker One-Shot

hey guys! since everyone reacted so well to my first one-shot (which you can read here), I decided to write another one! I got inspired after reading this by itsallavenger, it’s really awesome so check it out! I also wrote this because I know have 215 followers! Thanks everyone for the follows, it means so much to me! Okay, enjoy the fic! 

Characters: Peter, Ned, MJ, May, Flash, Tony 

Warnings: Some violence, underage drinking, drug use, just angst tbh

Word Count: 4434

Summary: Peter, MJ, and Ned all go to a party at Flash’s house after he promises to “make amends” with Petr. While MJ and Ned are skeptical, Peter is ecstatic to finally be rid of the bullying and to be accept by his peers. But, nothing goes right for Peter. 

The day started nothing like how it had ended. To Peter, Ned, and MJ, it had been a typical Friday. They had gone through all their classes. They competed to see who could answers more questions correctly in class. They saw who got the highest grade on their recent chem test; Peter in first with a 98, MJ in second with a 97, and Ned in third with a 93.

During lunch the trio sat together at their usual table, discussing their plans for that night.

“Okay, so after Decathlon practice, we’re going to Peter’s apartment to finish building the Death Star. Does everyone know their parts?” Ned asks while chowing down on the sub par school lunch.

“You’re in charge of building the framework, I’m in change are building the upper half-” Peter responds and MJ picks up from there.

“And I’m in charge of building the bottom half. I’m in as long as I get to pick the music this time.” MJ responds, not looking up from her binder for the Decathlon team.

“Hey, what’s wrong with my music?” Peter asks defensively.

“Surprisingly, nothing. But I have some new records that you guys would actually appreciate.” MJ responds, her voice remains its normal steadiness.

“I’m excited to finally finish the Death Star! This is gonna be so epic!!” Ned exclaims with a warm smile on his face.

“Maybe if we finish in time we can watch The Empire Strikes Back!” Peter responds, looking for both their reactions.

“Star Wars is cool, but Star Trek is way better. Way more diversity and to be honest, much more scientifically sound than Star Wars, sorry George Lucas.” MJ responds, causing Peter to make a sour face.

“Star Trek is fine, but the story of Star Wars is way better. I mean it has everything! Adventure, love, drama, comedic relief!”

“All of which are found in Star Trek,” MJ responds.

“Fine, since we watched Star Wars last time, I guess we can watch Star Trek tonight,” Peter grumbles as he gives in to MJ.

“So guys, I was thinking we do some lightning round trivia for Decathlon practice today. We’ve been so focused on individual subjects that we should see what our critical thinking skills are like and test on all ten subjects. We tend to focus more on science and math, for obvious reasons, and we need to branch out.” MJ says and they talk about the decathlon practice until lunch is over and they are forced to finish the rest of their classes.

It wasn’t until after decathlon practice that their days changed. Mr. Harrington had already left the room to pick up his forgotten folder of paper that needed grading over the weekend. That’s when Flash decided it would be a good time to make an announcement.

“Listen up everyone! My parents are out of town this weekend and I’m throwing an absolute banger! I’ve decided to be nice for once and invite everyone! Kinda going for Party of the Year sorta thing!! See you all at 8.” Flash yells from atop a table, always aiming for dramatics.

“Yeah, no way we’re going to that lame party,” MJ says as she packs her bag.

“Parker! Come here a second!” Flash yells, signaling Peter over.

Peter, Ned, and MJ all look at each other, confused about why Flash would want to talk to Peter instead of publicly humiliating him instead.

Peter slowly makes his way over, a cautious look on his face.

“What do you want, Flash,” Peter asks in an aggressive tone.

“Woah, calm down there dude. I just wanted to say that I think we should have a fresh start.” Flash responds, laughing.

“A what?” Peter asks, caught completely off guard.

“A fresh start? You’re one of the smartest kids in the grade Parker, I assume you know what that means.” Flesh says.

“I know what it means, Flash. But why do you want it with me? Why the sudden change?” Peter asks, suspicious.

“You know, Parker. I never gave you a chance. I always saw you as competition so I made you my enemy. But since we’ve been on the team and everything that’s happened lately, I think we should start over. We could be better as friends than as enemies.” Flash says, and for a second, Peter believes him.

“Look, I get it if you don’t believe me. If the situation was flipped, I probably wouldn't either. Why don’t you and your friends come to the party tonight? Don’t worry about trying to find your own booze, I’ve got you covered. If I don’t prove to you my honesty tonight, then I’ll leave you alone. Think about it. People are coming at 8 if you do come.” Flash says, and before Peter can react, He’s gone.

Peter walks back over to MJ and Ned almost shell shocked.

“Dude, what was that?” Ned asks, concerned for his friend.

“What that ass-hat say this time? Another original dick joke?” MJ asks.

“He said he wants a fresh start?” Peter responds, still confused.

“A fresh start? Really, after being in school together for how many years he wants to pretend he hasn’t been an asshole to you?” MJ responds, anger slipping into her usually steady tone.

“I don’t know. He actually seemed kind of sincere. He invited all three of us to his party tonight to prove it.” Peter responds, earning an eye roll from MJ.

“While I’m always down for a party, I don’t think that’s a good idea. Fuck Flash, we have legos to build and Star Trek to debate about. That’s better than any party he could throw.” MJ responds, turning to walk out of the gym.

“Yeah, we can have more fun on our own than with them!” Ned adds, following MJ.

“Guys, I’m serious, I want to go! I think he was telling the truth! Why would he invite you guys too if he wanted to mess with me? Please, we should go!” Peter practically begs, an almost desperate look in his eyes.

MJ and Ned share a look for a moment before they break. Peter never is this adamant about anything that they do. If his friends want to do something, he’ll do everything in his power to do it. If they don’t want to do something, he drops it like he hadn’t even suggested it. But this is something he really wants. They didn’t want to see him get hurt, but they didn’t want to be the reason that Peter has one less bully either. Anyway, if they were there want could go wrong?

“Fine, we’ll go. But, that’s only if May can drive us and you owe us a lego and Star Trek night.” MJ says, causing the biggest grin to spread across Peter’s face.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you! You guys will not regret this!” Peter exclaims.

Little did MJ and Ned know that they would regret it.

The trio arrived at Flash’s house at 8:30, or what May called “fashionably late”. Ned was in his signature hat, giving off what he called “cool vibes”. MJ was in the same outfit she wore to school, not bothering to change. Peter wore a nice button up with jeans. For once, he decided to forgo the sweater to try and seem less like a nerd and more like the kind of person who goes to parties.

“Wow, I remember parties in the suburbs! These rich kids had the best houses to tr-. You know what, I’m not gonna finish that. Are you guys ready?” May asks as she pulled up in front of the huge house.

“Yeah, May we’re good. I’ll see at home later!” Peter rushes, wanting to get inside quickly.

“Thanks for the ride, May!” Ned says and MJ repeats.

“Don’t worry about it guys! And if you need a ride later, don’t hesitate to call!! My cell will be on all night! And don’t drink too much if you do!” May yells out of the window as the trio make their way up the huge driveway.

“I’m not drinking so you two have fun. One of us needs to be of sound mind.” MJ says.

“We’ll be okay, MJ. You don’t need to worry about us.” Ned replies.

“Yeah, okay sure,” MJ says.

When the three open the door, they are met with a sea of people. It seems like every kid in their grade came to the party. And seeing as the closest neighbor was half a mile away, no one would interrupt them. No one feared of being too loud or too crazy because the only ones who would know would be each other.

“Okay guys, make sure we stay together. Don’t want to lose each other.” MJ says as she starts to make her way through the crowd. Ned follows without a second thought but Peter scrambles after them.

For the most part, they stayed together. That is until they got to the kitchen. MJ and Ned continued forward, but Peter was called away by none other than the host himself.

“Peter, bro what’s up! Glad you made it!” Flash yells from behind the counter, surrounded by other guys on the football team.

“Oh, uh, h-hey guys! W-what's up?” Peter responds, entering the kitchen full of the guys who have berated him for the last ten years and even some girls who treated him like dirt.

“We’re just partying dude! Did you just get here?” Flash asks, no sign of hostility in his voice.

“Uh, yeah,” Peter responds, walking deeper into the kitchen.

“Well then let’s get you a drink! Betty makes some stronger rum and cokes? Do you drink those or are you into something else?” Flash asks, and frankly, Peter has no clue. He’s never drank before but he doesn’t want any of them to know that.

“Rum and cokes are my favorite man. I’d love one!” Peter responds, taking the cup handed to him by the pretty redhead.

“Let’s play flip cup! Peter, you’re on my team!” Flash says and after that, things get bad.

Ned and MJ spend a majority of their time trying to find Peter. Despite MJ’s warning, he quickly separated himself from the group. Not that MJ would say it, but PEter was vulnerable here, especially by himself. She didn’t trust Flash’s intentions. But, they kept getting distracted by people saying help or questioning why they were even at the party in the first place.

Back in the kitchen, Peter kept taking the drinks that were given to him. They were bitter, but he pretended that he knew that they would and was used to it. He didn’t want to look like a fool in front of the entire team and all the girls. He played game after game, not questioning the fact that they would stop halfway after he would finish. He was having fun. No one was yelling insults at him or degrading him. The girls weren’t ignoring him, they were interested in what he had to say. The guys wanted to talk to him. He felt on top of the world, almost as great as he did when he was Spider-Man. But drunk or not, he would never give that away. He didn’t feel the drinks at first. Sure, he felt a little lost and giggled more than he’d like to admit, but nothing too extreme. But then, it seemed to hit him like a ton of bricks.

His head started to hurt at first, but he blamed that on the loud music pumping throughout the house. Then, he felt a little dizzy, but he attributed that to the different flips and jumps that he had been encouraged to do by his new friends. But when he started to feel drowsy and a little out of breath he felt like something was wrong.

“Guysss, I-I don feel s g-good. M-Mayb I shoul goo lie-e own.” Peter’s speech was severely slurred, which in the back of his mind he knew he should worry about, but he couldn’t focus on anything right now.

“Aww come on, Parker. Don’t be such a pussy! The fun only just started!” Flash says, shoving Peter, causing him to go crashing into the counter, banging his ribs harshly.

The hit caused the wind out of him. The laughs combined with the music seemed to trigger something. Suddenly he was back under the collapsed building and not in the middle of Flash’s kitchen.

“Parker, don’t tell me you’re giving up on me now! I thought we could be friends! I even got these hot ladies to be nice to you!” Flash yells, tugging Peter forward, crashing into the sink.

“Guyss, ‘uys s-stop. I don f-feel ‘ood.” Peter responds, his breath quickening.

“I know what will make you feel better. Why don’t we show these girls how much of a pussy you really are!” Flash yells, causing the whole room to break out into laughter.

Before PEter could react, Flash is tugging on Peter’s shirt, attempting to show his scrawny body off. He also attempts to pull down Peter’s pants to further the humiliation. Peter now fully panics and shoves Flash as hard as his weak arms will allow him to.

Flash goes flying into the counter, wiping off the sick smile on his face.

“Big mistake, shithead!” Flash yells once he collects himself.

Suddenly, before Peter can react, Flash and four of his teammates are attacking him. Even completely sober, five on one would be a struggle. But right now, he was just shy of incapacitated. He was being berated with kicks, punches, and shoves. He was completely overwhelmed by all of it. He wasn’t being beaten up by school bullies, He was fighting The Vulture and his goons, except he couldn’t fight back. He wasn’t in the kitchen anymore. In his mind, he was somewhere else. Every hit to the stomach or chest and he was trapped in that building. Every hit to the face and he was facing The Vulture on the plane; he was still in the crash.

One kid, who while wasn’t friends with Peter also didn’t have anything against him, happened to stumble upon the scene. Horrified by what he was seeing, he scrambled to find Peter’s friends, hoping to stop this from becoming worse. MJ and Ned were on the back porch, on the other side of the house searching for Peter when a frazzled boy from their shared Calculus class approached them.

“Peter is getting crushed in the kitchen! Flash and his crew are kicking the crap outta him! I could hear a group of the cheerleaders that whatever they slipped in his drink was definitely working and he looks like he’s about the pass out! He’s hallucinating or something. He was like freaking out about a bird and like a building collapse. I didn’t know what to do so I went to you guys!” The kid yells, the alcohol he drank rolling off his breath.

“Oh my god, Peter!” MJ yells, her calm demeanor completely flipped into pure panic.

Ned and MJ rush to the kitchen, hoping to save Peter from whatever beating he was taking, scared out of their minds as to what Flash could have put into his drink. But, when they get to the kitchen, there is no sign of Peter. Just a ripped part of his shirt and splatters of blood on the counter and part of the floor.

“Flash, what the fuck did you do to him!” MJ screams, getting everyone’s attention.

“Oh, come on Michelle. We were just having a bit of fun! Little Penis Parker was the one who couldn’t handle it.” Flash says, getting laughs out of everyone but the pair.

“Where the fuck is he you piece of shit!” MJ screams, throwing the nearest cup at Flash’s head.

“Jesus, you bitch! I have no idea where he went! He ran out the front door screaming about plane crashes and vultures and buildings collapsing! I didn’t think the G would do that, but it was damn funny to watch!” Flash responds.

MJ and Ned share a look of pure horror.

“You sick fuck, you gave him GHP! What the fuck is wrong with you! How much did you give him?”

“Well the first vial didn’t work at first, so we added two more vials to be sure!” Everyone laughs.

Before anyone could respond, MJ marches up to Flash and punches him square in the nose. Blood immediately starts spurting out after a loud crack.

“Bitch, you broke my fucking nose! What the fuck is wrong with you!” Flash screams through the blood.

“He could overdose from that! He could die out there! I don’t know if you noticed due to your lack of humanity, but it’s the middle of December and it’s only twenty degrees out!” MJ screams.

Both her and Ned storm out of the house. Now that they were straying away from the house, panic replaced their anger.

“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god! What are we gonna do?” Ned panics.

“Peter! Peter, where are you!” MJ screams out of cupped hands.

“He’s could be miles away by now! How do you know he can hear you!” Ned reacts.

“Do you have a better idea! He’s Spider-Man for god’s sake! If he can hear someone in distress from so far away, how do you know he can’t hear us!” MJ yells back, stunning Ned.

“How did you know that! He didn’t tell you!” Ned responds.

“He didn’t have to, I just knew okay! My suspicions were confirmed when I went looking for his calculator and found his suit in his backpack! Anyways, this doesn’t matter! We need help!” MJ says, tears forming in her eyes. Ned and Peter were her best and only friends. She would be devastated if something bad happens to Peter and she could have stopped it.

“Well we can’t call the cops and if we call Aunt May she’ll freak out and call the fucking FBI if she needs to. But I have an idea of who to call!” Ned says as he rips his phone out of his sweatshirt pocket.

Peter had given up on running. Well, he hadn’t really decided that more like his body decided to stop listening to what he told it. He could barely keep his eyes open, all he wanted to do was sleep, but he couldn’t.

The Vulture and his gang of alien weapons criminals were after him. He couldn’t breathe, not after the building collapsed on him. He couldn’t remember how he got out. All he knows is that his body is in so much pain. He can still feel the heat from the plane crashing. But the cold from the snow feels so nice but so wrong on his bare skin. He couldn’t tell where he was.

He was terrified and alone and all he wanted was for Aunt May to hold him or MJ and Ned to find him. But he didn’t even know where he was. Was he in Brooklyn or Queens or Germany or somewhere else?

“Mr. Stark! It’s Peter’s friend, Ned Leeds! Mr. St-” Ned begins the call but is cut off by a tired Tony.

“Kid, I gave this number to you and Peter for emergencies only. What could you two need at 12 o’clock at night on a Friday!” Tony says, exasperated.

“Mr. Stark, Peter is in trouble a-and w-we can't-” Ned tries but is crying too hard to get through it. MJ rips the phone out of his hand.

“Mr. Stark, my name is MJ, I’m a friend of Peter’s. We were at a party and we got separated. Someone slipped GHP in his drinks and started to beat him up. He was hallucinating about his fight with The Vulture and ran out of the house and now we can’t find him! It’s really cold and we’re scared! We didn’t know who else to call!” MJ explains on the phone, her emotions getting the best of her at the end.

“I’m sending Happy to pick you up. I’m coming right now!” Tony screams into the phone before hanging up.

Tony threw his phone down onto the desk in his lap and immediately stepped into the suit. He set the speed to as fast as possible and rushed to the coordinates of the phone call. He didn't understand what was happening. He would understand Peter drinking, he’s 16 years old. But to hear he was drugged and beaten baffled him. He didn’t understand why kids would do that. Especially to someone so selfless and someone who tries so hard to make everyone happy.

Tony searched throw the snow for Peter. After what seemed like an hour but was probably only about 20 minutes he found him. He almost missed him at first, Thought the patch of black was a bush. But the red streaking around it caught his attention and F.R.I.D.A.Y. alerted him that it was in fact, Peter. He rushed down into the snow to scoop Peter up when he realized that Peter was, in fact, conscious and was attempting to fight off an invisible foe.

“Peter! Peter, stop no one is there. It’s just me!” Tony yells, but PEter either ignores him or can’t hear him.

Ton crouches next to Peter, holding onto him tightly, keeping him from hurting himself further.

“N-No, stop-p, lease. L-Leav me alon!” Peter screams out in an extremely slurred almost indistinguishable speech.

“Peter, it’s me! It’s Tony. The Vulture is in prison. You’re safe! You’re safe!” Tony screams, holding Peter tighter.

Recognition flashes in Peter’s cracked open eyes.

“M-Mista ‘Tark, wha-” PEter mumbles out, confused but Tony cut him off.

“Ned and MJ called me hysterical. Let’s go. You need to see a Doctor.” Tony responds, flying off with Peter, who passes out after he finishes speaking, in his arms.

Peter woke up, hours later in a hospital like bed. He barely remembered the night before. He remembered May dropping off him, Ned, and MJ at Flash’s house. Everything after that is gone. It was terrifying.

“Good morning,” Tony said, sitting in a chair next to the bed, startling Peter.

“How are you feeling?”

“Sore and confused. Where are MJ and Ned? Where’s May? How did I get here? What happened last night?” Peter asks confused.

He didn’t even plan on getting anything more than buzzed at the party last night. How did he black out? He remembers telling himself to only have four drinks. What happened?

“The doctors found GHP and Rohypnol in your system. Luckily, your enhanced metabolism made it flush out of your system quicker, but it also made you feel it much worse.” Tony responded.

“I was… I was drugged?” Peter asks quietly, his voice horrified.

“Apparently the bullies thought it'd be hysterical. Why didn’t you tell me you were having problems at school? Why were you even there in the first place? You never do that!” Tony asks.

“They, they said that they wanted to make amends. That they wanted a fresh start. They seemed so sincere. I wanted them to be sincere...” Peter responds tears in his eyes.

“Well, apparently they lied. They could have killed you! The drugs in your system slowed down your healing for a bit, so the injuries from the beating will take longer to heal.” Tony responds, pitying him.

“I’ve always been an outcast. Ever since I was a kid. All I had was May and Ned. Now I also have MJ but, I just wanted it to be different. I wanted them to stop berating me and beating me. I can’t fight back because I’m scared I’ll hurt them. I thought they changed…” Peter says, tears falling down his face and sobs racking his battered body.

“Peter, you don’t have to change yourself for them to like you. They’re narrow-minded assholes who won’t get far in life. You’re a good kid. You care so much about people. You’re a thousand times a better person than they all are combined. Don’t forget that.” Tony responds, holding Peter the same way he had the night before.

"Aunt May's gonna kill me," Peter says suddenly.

"She knows you're here. She was sitting with you all night until she had to go to work. She's not mad at you, just scared shitless." Tony responds.

Peter feels both relieved that he isn't going to be in too much trouble but he also feels guilty for making his Aunt worry.

At that moment, Happy burst into the room.

“I tried to take them home, sir. But they threatened to jump out of the moving car if I didn't take them to him. The girl even opened the door in the middle of the 1-9!” Happy says, flustered

“That’s alright, Happy. They can see him.” Tony responded, letting go of the now calmer {eter. MJ and Ned burst into the room, replacing Tony’s spot next to Peter.

“Oh my god, Peter are you okay? We couldn’t find you and you were so delirious and oh my god!” Ned blurts out.

“I’m sorry guys, I should have known it was a trap. I’m an idiot.” He says still emotional.

“Peter, you’re the smartest kid I know. Flash and them are idiots for not seeing that and they are gonna regret what they did. I’m glad you’re okay.” A light blush dusts MJ’s cheeks and Peter turns bright red.

"Thanks, MJ," Peter responds,

"Don't mention it, loser." She responds and they both laugh.

Well, there it is! I really hope that you enjoyed it because I worked hard on this one! It started off as like a quick idea turned into this huge thing so oops. Please let me know if you liked it or hated it or anything you thought about my writing! I love to hear back and I am always trying to get better. 

Also shout-out to tcm--holland for saying a bunch of kind things about my writing! They’re an awesome writer and one of my favorite Spider-Man writers so you should check them out! 

[lindsaywesker]

Good morning! I hope you slept well and feel rested? No walk or gym today. I just don’t have the time. Man, I’m busy! Currently in my study, attired only in my blue towelling robe, enjoying my first cuppa of the day. Covering for Ronnie Herel on Mi-Drive today, so I need to be out of here by 1.40 to be at the studio by 3.00. Still got assignments to mark; need to get that finished today! Was going to fill in a grant application form for my radio course today but that’s out the window! Maybe tomorrow? Spent a six hours with my mother and brother in Hove yesterday and we had a right laugh! When I rolled into Willesden Junction just after 8.00pm, I was STILL full from lunch! Mum didn’t just make bangers and mash, she threw in roast chicken, carrots and red cabbage too, and here’s the significant bit, she then wants to serve dessert! Not one, not two but three items: fruit salad, Tiramisu and Waitrose vanilla custard. As she poured on the custard, I looked at her and said, “That’s a bit excessive, innit?” The look of disdain she gave me, you should have seen it! How preposterous that I should be suggesting such a thing! And that is my mother to a tee: ridiculous, extravagant, illogical. Desserts have always been a big part of my life; The Trouble thinks I’m a feeder! Mum sat back in her electric recliner and covered herself in a blanket. “I love winding Daniel up,” she cackled. “He gets so upset!” “You’re out of order!” I said to her. “Leave him alone!” “I’ve always been wicked!” she said to me. “Always!” And you wonder why I’m such a troublemaker? I learnt from the best. I shall be back in Harlesden after 8.00 this evening. Just enough time to eat dinner with The Trouble before we fall asleep in front of the TV. Not sure how an unemployed man can be so busy? And I haven’t even worked out my questions for Wayne Marshall yet! And, no, I will not be talking to him about The G Spot. Most men still can’t find it and they gave up looking ages ago! And don’t ask me ... or I’ll tell ya! Have a throbbing and thrusting Thursday (with hopefully a few thrills through your thoroughfare?) I love you all. And, remember, if you like this flow, check out one of my three novels (available via Amazon.)

[sl-c]

thoughts @ 1.30am in bed 31.7.17

why can’t i sleep when i’m so tired

i’m literally overwhelmed by how happy & balanced I am at the moment

can’t believe i actually eat kale & enjoy it now; officially level 15 vegan

man I love yoga; it makes me feel so strong, so content, so fresh, so comfortable in my body, so able, so happy, just ah

it’s amazing how much one night can change

my wardrobe really feels like it has come together with my recent purchases these last few months

my room also feels so much better; more open to receiving energy, cleaner, free of unnecessary waste, airy, light, inviting

this is the most ‘normal’ I’ve felt since before everything changed 5 years ago, I had no idea what it would feel like or if I could feel it ever again but man I’m beyond stoked to be here

the ocean is so powerful, not just physically, but emotionally & particularly spiritually

really due to do a good tarot reading

also need to energise my crystals in the ocean, but thinking of waiting for the next full moon so really get things going

he’s so good

linen is awesome

I really want to start a diary where I track all my spendings

still need to get my camera fixed

can’t believe I start dance in a week !!!! something I’ve wanted to do for over a year, maybe more, & it’s finally happening !! but shit I need to send them banking stuff to make sure I’m booked in

can’t wait to finally do a female nude shoot, I’m seriously obsessed with the female figure 

I find myself particularly infuriated at the moment by the fact that society has constructed people to sexualise images/films/stories of the female body. It’s hard enough for women to feel comfortable in their bodies & selves & find self-love & empowerment with sexism, lack of shape/size diversity in fashion, bullying (etc), so they sure as hell don’t need everyone judging how they show their body. I find it all a bit ironic too. I mean most people will encourage someone with finding self-love, but if that meant they wanted to show more of their body for their own reasons then we’re more than happy to drag that person back down & associate these actions with sexual intentions as opposed to ones of self-love. AND, even if someone had sexual intentions, that is absolutely fine because that is their decision so can everyone just fucking mind their own business & try to be nice, support one another & stop bringing each other (which is ultimately humanity itself) down. 

really starting to appreciate bums more, which has also led me to overcome my allergy to squatting & really try to put some more effort into growing (well strengthening) a better booty

my best friend and I do absolutely everything & anything together. We adult-ed so well together this week & she supported me to get some tests done that were weirdly nerve-racking & i just fucking love her so much I can’t deal. 

It’s funny to think how things change over time. I seriously just was not interested in drinking for years & now I love doing it at the right occasions & find I really look forward to it. No, it isn’t the healthiest thing, but life is more than just your physical health & it feels so good to have that balance my life. 

some people are such gems 

I’m finally go rock climbing tomorrow after wanting to do it for basically 2 years but just never finding the right opportunity !! and i’m doing it with a good friend, then we’re going jumping on trampolines & finally back to mine to watch one of my favourite new movies (’Given’). keen as a bean.

I feels so healthy in every way at the moment; the body is feeling so good & so is the mind, heart & soul

I really want to send some hours doing some bigger art projects atm but I’m already so busy & want to get another job too so just don’t know how I’m going to do it all

really don’t know what I want to do with my life in terms of future career paths atm & I’m not worried in the slightest. 

monochrome & natural colours for life

vintage denim is the bomb.com

holy guacamole I didn’t realise how much lingerie I bought & now have until I was going through it all with my friend the other day; it literally makes me so happy I can’t deal. 

bought such a cute linen dress/gown today that has such a low back, I’m such a sucker for details like that; I really love fashion

kisses & cuddles

I had the best hangover food last week: corn chips, salsa, brown rice, Moroccan veggie patties, peas - highly recommend

I love being active at the moment, whether it’s walking, doing yoga, going to the gym - I love doing a bit of everything & damn, I just feel so good atm

my body is back into craving serious whole foods - straight fruit n veg - & it feels so good. I love eating tons of bananas & it makes my body feel so good; keen for my 10kg box of organic ripe nanas to arrive tomorrow :D #justveganthings #nicecreamfordays 

cotton g-strings are the best. (srsly tho if you prefer g-bangers, give the lace a rest so that your GG can get some air, it’s best to keep up good hygiene)

oh woah my birthday is in 2 & a 1/2 weeks, should be fun. My bday dress is so over the top & I love it so much omg 

far out i’m so tired

gonna try sleep for the 5th time

[makingabigdealoutofnothing]

CLEAN (part I)

I needed a place to live. Bad.

I was on the Craigslist housing hunt. Trying to find a place grand enough to fit my modest needs and cheap enough that I could still afford the occasional coke binge. And car payments.

Living downtown in a stretch of Skid Row for the past 2 years had started to grind on my love of life. Everyday a poignant questioning of existence and surreal lack of lust. A grandiose dose of ousted reality. And my roommates never charged my PS4 controllers.

There were fleas in my pad that had been brought in and bred by a mangy little mutt my roommate liked to keep around. My guests would always leave vehemently scratching infected skin.

There were roaches, too. Big ones and little ones. The little ones enjoyed trekking over your dishes; dirty or clean, it didn't matter to them. They were living fast and dying young. The big roaches were gluttons.

Moths lived in my wardrobe, and didn't help with rent. They were lost souls, I liked to imagine.

Along with the fleas and the moths and the roaches and the bed bugs, the multitudes of junkies and quasi-gang bangers dwelling the streets 'neath my Skid loft were bringing me closer and closer to the noose. I always kept one in my drawer next to my briefs.

In the beginning of my days in Skid Row, the homeless were benign in my mind. They inhibited my happiness very little. They're the same today as they were then- the ghetto blasters and rash nature and patronage to the overbearingly loud crack-selling ice cream trucks- only now I'm bit to shit by bugs and want a better job and am fighting for sanity through a month long dry spell. And my diet is shit.

So I responded to a Craigslist ad for a place in Hollywood. The price wasn't bad and it was closer to where I work and the homeless were less in volume and more docile.

I spoke to the proprietor over the phone and he had a wonderful East Coast accent.

“Yeah, yeah- it's a great spot, the spot's great and utilities included, good people- good people only, mind you- you're cool right?”

There was a pause as I wasn't sure if it was a question or rhetoric.

“… Yeah, I'm cool,” I responded.

“Great, great. 'Cause like I said: good vibes only. Good people. Good vibes. And you gotta be clean.”

“I'm a good guy, I promise. And I'm clean,” I purported. By my standards I'm clean as a Santa Monica coffee shop, but my entire adult life I've been scorned by roommates with varied standards of cleanliness.

“Alright. Be there in an hour,” the East Coaster requested. “And… You are clean, right?”

“Yeah, I'm clean.”

Stepping over a downed body outside my building, I walked down 6th towards the van that my ailing van was parked in. I was paying $150/month just to keep my whip off the precarious streets. Fuck downtown, I reaffirmed to myself.

Most of my fellow Skid Row residents didn't like me- because I'm white, I assumed. My daily walk to the parking garage included death threats and racial intolerance. The crooked police men and women used to ask me if I was lost. Perhaps I was.

I made it to my van and exited the garage. Rolling down the window I took a sturdy whiff of the urine stained stench of mental illness and drug abuse and incompetence. I drove off with gaiety.

Arriving in Hollywood outside of my potential new home, I was elated. It looked fantastic, and I was truly shocked that it was only $800/month, utilities incl. and dogs woof woof (though the East Coaster didn't sound like a dog type).

The guy met me downstairs and let me through the freshly painted red gate that served as barrier between the outside world and hopefully my new inside world.

“Come in, come in,” Jerry hastily gestured. He was a wiry curly-haired multi-ethnic looking type- perhaps half Jew, quarter Puerto Rican, and the last quarter a mix of Bronx and punk rock- he wore a black T-shirt with a gold chain and stood about 5'7”.

“So what's your situation? You been in town long? You work? You're cool? You look pretty clean.” His persistence on the importance of cleanliness was becoming a bit foreboding. He smelled like rose water.

“I work in film and am just looking for an affordable place to unwind when I'm not working.” I went on, with Jerry filling in my sentences with 'mhmm, mhmm'.

“Sounds like you're a decent guy. I've shown the place to some real deadbeats- you know, like they sound presentable over the phone but they get here smelling like the gym and asking for a cup of water. First impressions, right?”

“Right.”

“Now I've been living here for 9 years, had roommates come and go,” Jerry went on, “some people have vibed some people have not. I've had to kick some assholes out, some people have left on their own accord- you know, change in passion, want to move to the woods, you know the story.”

“Sure.”

“Now what I can't stand is people that are living under the...” he paused and gesticulated, searching for the right word, “...masquerade of being clean people- but they come in here and set me right the fuck off.”

“How so?” I bit.

“Come oooon, you know. Like putting a beer can down on the cawfee table without a coaster. Taking a shit and not cleaning the toilet after. Sliding the fucking chairs around and scratching the floors… FUCK I just get can't fucking stand that shit.”

“I hear you.”

“Like you can have 10 people over, you know, 15 people. I don't give a shit. Do your fucking coke, fuck your whores, talk shit on Catholicism and niggers… whatever,” Jerry was pacing, perspiring. “But if I go into your room when you're not home and your clothes aren't folded and bed isn't made, I SWEAR TO GOD, I'll fucking merc you!”

This is just an act, I figured. He can't THAT totalitarian. Every place I've moved into it's the same thing, whether it's with friends or strangers via the List: everyone says the importance of cleanliness like it's some sort of dogma. I always just nod, agree, and assure. Which is what I did.

“Dude, I understand. You don't have to worry about cleaning up after me. I'm as clean as a Santa Monica coffee shop.”

[Writer's note: I've repeated that comparison because I'm currently sitting in a very clean coffee shop in Santa Monica.]

Jerry relaxed a little bit. “Good. I'm glad we have an understanding.”

“Where do I sign?”

Jerry tightened back up. “Sign? I told you buddy, good vibes only. You're coming into my place, I'm doing you this favor, and you're asking me about signing? You're a good guy, I'm a good guy- we're vibing. And you're asking me about signing.”

“Sorry man, sorry,” I wasn't sorry. This guy clearly just had an abusive mother. “So what is the process then?”

“It's alright, it's alright. I just get a little worked up over that shit sometimes. Now that we've established that you're a clean, decent human, you just give me first and last and the room is yours. That's it.”

“Alright then- I can give you a money order today-”

“-money order? What the fuck?! I told you buddy, good vibes only.”

“How does a good guy pay a good guy and maintain good vibes?” I inquired.

“Cash buddy. That's the only way.”

The duckies were starting to line up here. Bad duckies. Perhaps I was mistaken, but now it seemed like this clean freak East Coast Puerto Jew was trying to scam me. I was still willing to talk business.

“I can give you cash today. No problem.” I was playing it cool, though I actually wanted to punch Jerry in the balls. “BUT, I need you to take a photo of your ID over your rent agreement and send it to me. Those are my conditions.”

Jerry put his index to his nose, thumb under chin, looked down to the ground and let out an exaggerated sigh.

“I'm trying to not kick you right the fuck off of this balcony,” Jerry said, and I looked down at the cars driving below on Sunset. “You're a clean guy, and decent. I would be fine with you living in my place. But if you want to get through this you're going to need to be more personable.”

“I told you what I need from you, and it's not that much.”

“GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE YOU FUCKING SWINE, YOU FUCKING SHIT-EATING LITTLE PARASITE, YOU WORM!”

I left without responding that swath of insults. I was still considering just giving him the cash. I needed a place to live. Bad.

The second half of this story is better than the first half. Continue reading next time.

[christinamorassi]

My Top 10 Pleasure List for Intense Times

I know it’s super easy for Pleasure to go out the window during intense times…  

But did you know that Pleasure can actually help to cure trauma?

Science says experiencing pleasure for at least 20 seconds (of the sexual AND non-sexual variety):

Relaxes tension in the body

Sends a signal to our brain that we are safe, which calms our nervous system

Releases pleasure hormones like dopamine and oxytocin that counteract cortisol, the stress hormone

Amazing, right?

So I wanted to write today with some gentle reminders of how easy it is to access Pleasure, for the benefit of your nervous system, AND for a little rebellious ‘Pleasure Activism’ during this current political climate too.

Top 10 Pleasure List for Intense Time

No need to do every one…  But read through and try whichever 1 feels best!

1. Self-Care Soak ~  Draw a bath, get the water temp just right, light some candles, play soothing music, dim the lights, add epsom salts + essential oils & maybe rose petals too, and slip into a warm bath to soak all the intensity away.

Inspiration: 3 Ways to Make a Cleopatra Milk Bath

2. Move Your Body

~ It’s so easy to allow our bodies to freeze or get sedentary while experiencing such intensity.  So find a movement that feels gentle and pleasurable to your body and get into motion…  Have a dance party, go for a walk, do yoga, exercise at the gym, and/or swing those hips.  

Inspiration:  Here’s a Spotify Playlist of slow and sensual movement to get you into those hips. But feel free to make your own playlist of whatever gets your groove on!

3. Nature Bath ~ Go for a walk in nature, and allow the purity of Mother Earth to wash you clean.  Slow-w-w-w-w-w down, admire the beauty around you, listen to all the sounds…  And extra points for even hugging a tree.  :)  (I’m telling you, those trees would be happy to drain all that intensity out of your body for you.)

4.  Make 5-Minute Art ~ Everyone has an inner artist so you can’t get this wrong!  My friend Samantha Bennet teaches her clients to do this and I find it’s a brilliant way to channel intensity into creavity.

Inspiration… Dance a little jig, write a nonsensical poem, scribble off a drawing, sing a wee song, make a few watercolor brushstrokes, compose a photo, or pick some flowers from the yard to make a bouquet.  Allow it to be spontaneous and have fun with it! 5.  Smell Essential Oils ~ Our nasal passages go straight back into the brain, so smelling something pure and beautiful is a great way to change your mental state.  Grab your favorite essential oil, pour a few drops into your hands, hold your hands over your nose like a little tent to create your own diffuser, and take deep breaths through your nose to breathe in the medicine of essential oils. 6.  Watch Something Funny ~ Laughter from the belly is a great Pattern Interrupt!  So explore all those great comedy specials on Netflix (my current fave is Ali Wong!), search youtube for funniest videos (how about Whose Line is it Anyway?), and ask around for funny movie recommendations too. 7.  Fear/Trauma Melters ~ This is one of my favorite practices from a mentor of mine, Kathyln Hendricks.  It’s a video to help identify how you deal with stress (Fight, Flight, Freeze, or Dissociate), and then a simple action to take to help to remedy each version of stress.  It’s been really helpful for me to have this movement vocabulary available in real time moving forward!  So I invite you to check it out.

Inspiration: Fear Melter Video from Kathlyn Hendricks

8.  Ask for a Hug ~ Did you know research shows oxytocin is released during hugs lasting 20 seconds or longer?  Flood your body with this feel-good hormone when you ask someone in your life for a hug who I bet would be thrilled to say YES.

Inspiration:  Super sweet video of people invited into long hugs  9.  Swamping ~ This is a practice I learned from my mentor Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts to let music help you express your emotions through the body.  Unfortunately women suppress the full range of their emotions because they’ve never been taught how to express them.  But putting on super sad and melancholic music could help you feel all your sadness & grief by wailing and crawling around…  And/or listening to some head banger heavy metal music could help you access some of your rage as you hit pillows and stomp on the floor. Give it a shot with my playlist below.

Inspiration: Spotify Playlist of Swamping Songs, both grief & rage  10.  Sensual Pleasure ~ Take some time for the pleasure of physical intimacy. Slow, present, loving, connected intimacy (either with a partner OR with yourself!) floods the body with feel-good hormones, is deeply nourishing, and also an instant mood changer.

Inspiration: One of my favorite videos by Adina Rivers on How to Make Sex Unforgettable

So which one draws your attention the most?

I invite you to pick your favorite one…   Try it out today…   And practice some great self care, EVEN amidst intense times.

You’ve got this. “What matters most is how well you walk through the fire.” ― Charles Bukowski