#a FANTASTIC thing that also happened is that friend fashion show visited last month for two weeks and it was delightful

[riftwalker-limbro]

HI I'M STILL ALIVE

shitstorm summer has evolved into Misery Autumn which was delightfully milder but still somewhat annoying to get through and now we're heading into Wet Sock Winter which is gonna be the last leg and then i'll be living my best fucking life come spring. and will be back doing so many arts and crafts and writings and music and everything and it'll be great

what happened CONCRETELY is that i managed to move and mostly set my house up, then managed to make it through my probationary period at work so i have a great job now, and i've managed to wrangle my supervisor + work into accepting the projection of me finishing my godforsaken thesis by end of december (work is being stupidly nice about it. i have a good feeling about the whole job now)

essentially it's true that shit is a great fertiliser because i'm doing great moving to fantastic now and though i have currently lost the warframe hyperfixation it WILL be back sometime soon (timescale of a few months). looking forward to being back but there's a few tiny loose ends to fix up still (arguably a thesis is not a tiny loose end but i'm not gonna give it more attention than that. it's a little shit)

[httphopewrld]

I Don’t Know What to Call This | (f/m/a)

Just Friends? Friends with benefits? Dating? Questions swarmed your mind when one of your dear friends, Allie, asked about you and Hoseok’s relationship. The truth was you didn’t know. You and Hoseok were close, knowing each other since elementary school, and considered each other friends. However, as you two grew older, maturing into separate professions—you a well-known fashion designer, and Hoseok a famous musician and dancer—you two had engaged in some intimate activities (sex—lots of it.) After Allie’s simple question, you had to confront your feelings. But were you and Hoseok ready to be more than close friends and f*ck buddies?

Pairing: friend/lover/bfhoseok! x female reader

Genre: slowburn fluff and SMUT

Rating: 18+ because there’s swearing and pretty detailed smut

Warnings: swearing and SMUT (one of the most detailed smuts I've written, and there's more than one sex scene.) Smut includes: switch!reader and switch!hoseok, grinding and thrusting, protective sex (USE CONDOMS, I cannot stress that enough), lots of kissing, ass-grabbing, dirty talk, a wee bit of choking on both sides, squirting, male and female oral, fingering and handjobs, vibrator use, cyber-sex, the reader uses dildo, slight degradation, and just lots of filth—YOU'RE WELCOME FELLOW FILTHY ANIMALS. Oh, and spoilers for the horror movie Hush. It's on Netflix if you haven't watched it yet. It is GOOD.

  Word Count: 16, 465 (wowie)

A/N: Thank you for waiting! It’s rushed, so expect some little mistakes here an there, but I’m happy with how it turned out. I hope y'all enjoy it! Also, Y/L/N means "your last name."

  Taglist: @kirbykook​ @kleritata​ @taestannie​ @jenotation​ @hemmos-obrien​ @zeharilisharaban​ @speed-of-wind​ @kawaisoraya​

⊱ ────── {⋅. ✯ .⋅} ────── ⊰

“You can move those over there,” you gestured to the left corner of the windowed room, where a pile of boxes waited. The move was going to take longer than you expected because the movers arrived a week later than your assistant, Rachel said. I really need to talk to her about this. You stressed in your mind, rubbing your temples. “Are you okay?” You looked up, vision resuming its focus on your friend, Allie. Allie, your friend for as long as you could remember, offered to help you move to your new building. She would help you manage everything, including the movers, tracking your company's items, and the layout you gave to her for said things while managing the company. “I’m just irritated at Rachel,” you noticed her confusion, “my new assistant.” She nodded, remembering, “Right. Why is she still employed?” “Because she’s new, and being an assistant is a tough feat. She’ll get it soon.” You reassured, “Rachel is a fast learner, and this is her first mistake. We’re prepared for the next show, though, because Westley's helping me organize it.” “Remind me who Westley is?�� Allie asked. You sighed. “West is like my second brain. He helps organize the fashion shows, hire the models, find the venues, and secure the guest list. He has other people help him too, but he’s the brains of that. I create the fashion, and he finds a way to present it.” Allie nodded, “Gotcha.” Your phone rang, and you answered. “Y/N.” “Y/N!” Rachel chimed on the other end. “It’s Rachel. I’m so sorry about the mix-up on dates. It won’t happen again, I—” “I know it won’t, Rachel. You’re new, so I expected to slip up. I’ve gotten it taken care of,” you nudged Allie’s arm, and she smiled. “We’re luckily prepared for the next show in Vancouver, so you don’t have to worry about the mess up. All I need you to do now is make sure that my fabrics are coming in.” “Yes! They’ve arrived at the studio.” Rachel replied. "Fantastic. Thank you. That'll be all for now. Check on West if he needs anything." You ordered. “Will do, Y/N. Talk to you soon.” You hung up. The Vancouver show was in five months, giving you and your team enough time to design the clothes for the production and move to the new building. The show's theme was natural bodies of water and nature, a nod to Canada's landscape. The clothing catalogue would include various icy blue shades to represent waterfalls and warm emerald tones like flora and fauna. These colours would be encapsulated in elegant gowns and suits, worn by different body shapes, genders, and colours. The materials would be made from recycled fabrics from your previous shows and from your fellow artists. You were known for designing elegant attire, so it was best to keep to it. However, it was rare to see different sized, coloured, and gendered models on a runway; because of having to customize clothes to those models. Additionally, making clothes from recycled fabrics would be tough. “Okay,” you began, “I need to talk to my design team and plan out the gowns. Can I leave you here to deal with the movers?” Allie gave you a thumbs up. “Thank you,” you smiled, hugging her, “if you need anything, please call me or Rachel, or both. We’ll be back to help.” Before you left, a thought struck you. You turned around to face Allie. “I should just hire you.” She chuckled, “Why?” You scoffed, "Because you're here all the time!" You walked back to her. "Listen, you're the best manager I know. You can be my third brain. You already are, outside of work, so it would make sense." Allie seemed unsure. “I already have my job at Youth and Hope.” You grasped her hands. “You would be given a great wage, not just because you’re my best friend, but because you’re going to be busy with lots of work. You would be handling the management tasks, like West. You’d be given a good amount of vacation, trips for shows and meetings would be paid for—you could get that loft you always wanted downtown.” You wiggled your eyebrows, and Allie laughed. “Don’t I have to go through an interview process?” You brushed a hand through the air. “I can get someone to interview you and officially hire you. Once that’s done, you’ll start getting paid.” You checked your watch, and a quick rush of panic ran through you. “Shit, I’m going to be late. Consider it, alright! Let me know your availability, and we’ll schedule an interview!” “Okay!” She shouted back as you left. . . The coffee had become bitter. You weren’t sure if it was the roast or the fact that this was your fourth cup of the night. It had been a month since the fabrics arrived. Thanks to Allie, your friend and now employee, your move to the new building was complete; however, your designs weren’t translating as smoothly as you wish. "Fuck," you cursed, resting your head in your hands and rubbing your temples. The sketches waited in front of you—the measurements and ideas raking at your confidence. Your designs are redundant. You’ve done something similar last time.                                                                       Boring. Plain. You turned back to your mannequins, still bare. The theme was in your mind, and your design team reassured you that your sketches were fine, but it all felt fuzzy. “Y/N,” Rachel peered into the studio from the door, “there’s a gentleman here to see you.” “His name?” You asked, still looking at the mannequins. You heard footsteps retreat into the front lobby, then come back to the door. “Jung Hoseok?” You turned around, trying to contain your excitement. “Please send him in.” Rachel nodded, jogging back to the lobby. You heard a muffled “thank you” before heavy footsteps approaching your studio. Hoseok reached the doorway, beaming his signature smile. He wore acid-washed jeans, a baggy white sweater that matched his chunky light sneakers. His dark hair was slightly wavy and parted in the middle. A tote bag was slung over his shoulder. “Y/N!” He cheered, opening his arms wide. “Hoseok!” You replied, running into his arms and hugging him tightly. You couldn’t remember the last time you saw Hoseok—a year or two? “Fuck, how long has it been?” You asked him. He pulled away, thinking. “About six months?” Totally off. “Seriously, it felt longer than that.” You argued. Hoseok pulled out his phone and scrolled through his calenderer and photos. He made a ‘tsk’ sound. “Ah, see here,” he showed you a few photos of you two with his friends, who were also his bandmates, “six months ago, you joined us on tour for a couple days before coming back here. I have it also marked in my calendar.” He showed you the dates, which were marked with ‘💚Y/N’s visit💚.’ “Can Namjoon or Yoongi confirm this?” You crossed your arms. Hoseok mimicked your body language. “I can call them right now,” he challenged. You two stood in competitive tension. You succumbed. “You win this time, Jung Hoseok.” He playfully chuckled. You realized that Hoseok doesn’t live around here. “Wait, why are you in town. Shouldn’t you and the others be in Korea planning another album or something?” You speculated. “Our company gave us a month for vacation because we spent most of the year touring.” Hoseok sighed. “So, I decided to come to visit.” You hugged him again, happy to see someone who wasn’t your employee amidst this chaos of stress. “How long are you staying?” You asked, muffled against his chest. He paused. “Maybe a month?” You pulled away from him, shocked. “A month? Here? That’s all your vacation time.” “Yeah,” he replied, as if that wasn’t a big deal, “I didn’t want to travel to a bunch of places because the group and I have been doing that for almost a year—and it’s pretty chill in this area.” He sighed. “Besides, I don’t think many people would recognize me. The airport wasn’t busy, and I haven’t been swarmed by fans yet.” “Do you have a place to stay?” You asked. He nodded. “Yup! I’m staying at a fancy hotel. I got the suite at the top floor,” he made a gesture with his hand, indicating how high up his suite was. You playfully elbowed his side. "Wow, look at you, Mr. Famous. You can afford a top suite now. Are you sure you don't want to stay with me, though?” Hoseok dismissed your offer with a wave of his hand. “It’s alright, Y/N. Thank you, though.” He peered over your shoulder, “It looks like you’re busy anyway, so I think I’ll just stick to my suite.” He walked past you, over to the bare mannequins. “Are you preparing for that show in Vancouver that you told me about?” You nodded, relaying your theme and ideas to him. He smiled. “That sounds really cool,” he pointed to the mannequins, “but don’t you need some clothes for the show, then?” You rolled your eyes, chuckling at him for being a smart ass. “Yes, I do. I’m brainstorming some ideas right now, but I’m coming up with nothing. I have the design team coming in tomorrow with drafts, but I’d like to bring my own thing to the table, you know? I’m the main brain of this operation, and it’d be embarrassing if I come in with zilch.” You leaned against one of the tables, facing the mannequins. "The tough part is designing gowns that fit the right people, you know. Sure, you can make a collection of clothes, but they won't look good if they don't fit the models." You shook your head. "Maybe it's just tougher to design clothes for different bodies. I should just stick to one type of person and leave it at that." Hoseok walked up beside you, leaning against the same table and facing the figures. “Why don’t you find the models and then design the clothes?” You looked at him, surprised. “But wouldn’t that take a long time?” He crossed his arms, “Well, how many models would you need?” “We’re thinking around seventy. There’s going to be two changes within the show.” Hoseok nodded, and you could see him brainstorming. “Well, you have four months left, right? You and your team can make some drafts, cast the models, and finalize the ideas with said models. Which would take about a couple of months? You could do that while planning the show?” He paused, appearing to notice your hesitant expression. “Think about it. You’ve trained your team well enough to work on its own, right? That’s what you did for your last show, which was a success. You came in every day for a couple hours to make sure everything was in order, then focused on other things.” Hoseok grasped your hands. “You’re great at multitasking, so do it. It’s scary, but you can check on people every day to make sure everything’s alright.” You bit your lip, “I-I don’t know, Hoseok. That sounds like a lot of work—” “You did it last time, and it worked out just fine,” he gently squeezed your hands, “and I’m here for a month. I can help out whenever you need me. I’ll simply clean things up and fetch coffee if that’s what you need.” You laughed, “Like my intern?” “Yeah! I don’t know how to design anything or plan a fashion show, but I’ll do what I can.” He smiled. “You’re so much more than you think, Y/N, and if you need reminders, I’ll be here.” You smiled back at him, so grateful to have him here. “My god, you’re fucking sweet,” you scoffed, taking your hands out of his. Hoseok laughed. You pushed yourself off the table and faced him. “How did we even become friends?” You questioned. He actually gave it a thought. “You joined by dance club in elementary school, when no one else would.” He laughed so hard that he teared up. “I think we actually took club photos, and it was only you and I posing.” You laughed with him, remembering those days spent trying to breakdance to hip hop and presenting dance routines to your parents. “Yeah, that was before you joined that Music Academy in grade four, right?” He nodded, and you sighed, surprised you still remembered. Your mind came back to the present. “So, you’re actually okay with helping out?” You checked. “Why would I ask if I didn’t want to?” Hoseok replied. You tapped your index finger against your temple, “true.” “So, how much do you want?” Hoseok looked offended at your question. You chuckled. “Well, you’re going to work for me, so I need to pay you.” “It’s only just a month, though.” “Yeah, but—” “What about we see how much you have me do before you pay me?” He interrupted. “I might just have to fetch coffee, so you can just give me money on the spot.” You thought about it for a minute. Hoseok yawned. “This work talk is making me tired. Do you want to go out for dinner?” He looked around you, “Unless you have more work to do. I can always wait in the lobby for you to finish.” You brushed your hand through the air, “Nah, it’s okay. I’m pretty brain dead anyway. I need to be energized for tomorrow’s draft review.” Hoseok pushed himself off the table and clapped. “Awesome! Where do you think I’m taking you for dinner?” You bit your lip, trying to guess. “Sushi?” “Sushi it is!” He beamed. You grabbed your things and followed him out of the studio.

Both of you sat towards the back of the sushi restaurant, to Hoseok’s request. The waitress placed you two in a concealed booth, with drapes covering a small entrance.

You two had to take your shoes off before sitting down.

“Why did you say, ‘sushi it is?’” You asked, taking a sip of your water.

Hoseok opened his can of sprite, “What do you mean?”

“You asked where I thought you were taking me, I responded, and you said, ‘sushi it is!’” You reiterated.

He took a sip of his soda before responding, "It's a trick I learned from Instagram." He set his drink down. "You ask someone, 'where do you think I'm taking you for food?' dinner or whatever, and then take them to a place with that food. It's easier than asking 'what do you want to eat?' because people can't decide."

You nodded, making an ‘aaahhh’ sound. “Smart.”

You two caught up while eating your meals. Hoseok chatted about his bandmates and the tour, and you talked about your move to the new building.

Most of it was just adding more details about your lives because you two texted lots during the week and sometimes video chatted. You'd get to see Hoseok and his friends, and he'd get a view of your life on the other side of the world.

To others, it looked like both of you were dating. Both of your friends would tease, singing, "Y/N and Hoseok sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G." Many of his fans, ARMY, would theorize your friendship, pointing out the matching bracelets you two wore—which was later proved normal because Hoseok went live on Vlive making bracelets for his bandmates.

And you two would continually clarify that you two were strictly long-time friends. Nothing more.

Girls and boys can be friends. Simple as that.

You and Hoseok finished your meals. You two shared a few rolls and a bento box and were full.

“That was really good.” You commented, rubbing your stomach.

Hoseok chuckled, copying you, “I think I’m pregnant.”

You laughed, “Shut up! You’re so fit.”

“You’re right,” he replied, pulling up his sleeves and flexing his arms.

You both laughed as he flexed his muscles, which were significantly more prominent than your remembered. You were slightly jealous of his lean athletic figure.

And were gazing at it for too long.

“I don’t know about you,” Hoseok sighed, appearing to be tired from the food and flexing his muscles, “but I’m in the mood for some Ben and Jerry’s.”

Your eyes lit up. “YES.”

“Cookie dough with chunks?” You both said in unison.

You two erupted in laughter.

"I'll go play," Hoseok said, getting up.

You stopped him, “It’s alright,” you smiled, “my treat.”

Before you left the booth, you turned around and said thoughtfully, "But you're getting the ice cream."

Hoseok's expression conveyed the same seriousness as if a soldier on a mission.

He saluted you. “Copy that, Y/N.”

You saluted him back and left to pay.

The walk to Ben and Jerry’s was quick. Both of you were eager to share the tub of ice cream.

You ended up getting a chocolate chip cookie dough and a cherry Garcia pint, and two spoons to share. You both ate the ice creams with delight while walking back to your apartment building.

When arriving at your building, Hoseok handed you the cookie dough ice cream pint.

“What are you doing?” You asked while he gave you the closed pint.

He tilted his head to the side, confused. “What do you mean? I’m dropping you off at your place.”

You gave a shocked expression. “Dropping me off? We’re not even done our pints!”

“But you have work tomorrow. I don’t want to keep you up.” Hoseok stepped back towards the edge of the sidewalk. “I can catch a cab back to the hotel, don’t worry.”

You balanced the pints in one hand and used your other to grab his arm.

“You’re not going anywhere,” you said, pulling away from the curb and closer to your building.

Hoseok pulled his arm out of your grip. "Y/N, you need to be well-rested—"

“At least help me finish the ice cream.” You interrupted, holding up the pints that were now in both your hands, along with your spoon.

“We haven’t seen each other six months, and it’s only…”

Hoseok pulled out his phone. “Nine.”

“Exactly!” You expressed. “It’s only nine. I don’t need to be in until nine-thirty tomorrow morning. As long as you’re out by eleven, that gives me an hour to get ready for bed at twelve, and I will wake up at eight. Plenty of rest!”

You watched his unsure expression.

"If you don't want to go home at eleven, that's fine by me. Could you leave earlier? Or you can go back to your hotel if you want. I won't take offence; you know me." You held up your arms in surrender, ice cream pints still in your hands. "But if you're leaving because you're worried that I won't get enough sleep, don't. I'm a grown woman. I know how to take care of myself, and I want you to come in.

Hoseok bit his lip, appearing to debate the offer.

He sighed. "Fine, I'll come in. However, I don't want to get a text from you complaining about being tired in the morning."

“I swear,” you promised, pretending to draw an ‘x’ over your heart, “I cross my heart.”

Hoseok chuckled, and you led the two of you into your apartment building and into the elevator. You pressed the twentieth button, and you two waited in comfortable silence.

The elevator doors opened, and you two walked to your apartment.

You opened the door to your studio apartment, locking the door behind you two and hanging up your bag along with your keys.

“Want anything to drink?” You asked, setting down the ice cream pint in your hand and taking off your coat.

Hoseok set down the cookie dough pint on the coffee table. “Anything is alright, thanks,”

You hummed, getting both of you bottles of black cherry soda and bringing over the cherry Garcia pint and your spoon.

"Jesus, do you need help?" Hoseok asked with worry, seeing you holding the bottles by their necks in one hand and the ice cream pint and spoon in the other.

You chuckled, “It’s alright, just sit down.”

You two sat on the couch, twisting off the caps on your sodas and taking a sip.

Hoseok sighed. “That’s really good,” he gestured to the pop before putting it down on the coffee table.

“Yeah! They’re so addictive,” you replied, setting coasters under both of your drinks.

Both of you continued to reminisce about your childhood, especially middle school. The puberty years had been gruesome to you two, speckling your faces with acne.

You pulled out a photo album you kept on one of your bookshelves, which had pictures of your families and your younger selves—even photos when Hoseok was training, before debuting with BTS in 2013.

“Oh my god, look at you!” You gasped, showing him a picture.

In the photo, Hoseok arms were crossed over his chest, his attempt at having swagger. He wore a collared shirt, and his hair was short.

“Oh god, no,” Hoseok cringed, gently pushing the photo away.

You chuckled, "You were so adorable, always dancing and having a good time." You smiled. "You are such a hard worker, practicing so much. I remember you twisting your ankle but still practicing."

You looked at him tenderly. “I wish people could see that.”

Hoseok smiled back at you, softly touching your hand. You grasped his hand, feeling butterflies in your stomach.

He was the first to pull away.

“You remember our sleepovers?” He asked.

You giggled, "Yeah when you could leave that cramped place you shared with the boys."

He swatted your arm, “That apartment was good! It was where everything started.” He pouted. “Anyways, we would always look up deep questions to ask each other—or would you rather.”

You rolled your eyes. “Those questions were overrated.”

“I thought they were nice!” Hoseok defended. “We got to know each other more, like, ‘what is your biggest fear?’ or ‘what is your biggest pet peeve?’”

He must've seen your unimpressed expression because he continued, "You got to admit that you learned a bit more about me because of those questions!"

You sighed. “I did, I guess.”

Hoseok held up his index finger, seeming to signal ‘wait a minute.’

He pulled out his phone. “Let’s try some now, then.”

“Hoseok—”

“Come on,” he interrupted. “If you don’t learn anything new about me from the first four questions we do, then we can stop, alright? I will never bring up these questions ever again.”

You debated his offer.

“Fine.” You agreed, setting down the photo album. “Shoot.”

“Okay, but we both pick two questions and answer all of them. For example, when we ask a question, the other person answers before the picker.” Hoseok said while he scrolled.

You hummed, understanding his instructions.  

“Want to do would you rather?”

“Sure.”

"Sexy edition?" Hoseok wiggled his eyebrows. "Unless you're uncomfortable."

You scoffed. “Hobi, we're grown, adults. I can take a few sexual questions."

“Okay,” Hoseok replied, “but if you ever feel uncomfortable, we can choose another question or stop.”

You nodded, and Hoseok appeared to find what he was looking for.

“Alright,” he began, “would you rather bite someone’s ear during sex or bite someone’s lip during sex?”

This is pretty vanilla. You thought.

"Lip, for sure." You emphasized the 'sure' in your sentence, stringing along with the 'er' sound.

“Same,” Hoseok agreed while passing you his phone.

You took his cell and strolled through the website.

What do I choose? Do I just dive in, or go for the vanilla shit?

“Would you rather engage in foreplay or go right into the main course?” You asked.

Hoseok thought about it. “I would say foreplay. You can warm things up—and nothing is more fun than teasing.” He shimmied, making you two laugh.

You agreed, passing the phone to him.

“Oooo, here’s a classic,” he grinned, “top or bottom?”

“I think I’m a switch,” you replied.

He tilted his head.

“It’s like, you’re both, top and bottom. I like to take control sometimes, but I can also sub.” You explained. “You?”

“Top,” he replied, “for sure.”

You laughed, “You sound so against being a bottom.”

He laughed too. “I like pleasuring the person I’m having sex with. Nothing is more satisfying than making someone cum.”

“True,” you admitted.

You found your mind wandering to unholy memories of you and Hoseok. What was odd about your friendship that—to put it blatantly—you two had sex. Not just once, but a few times.

This is why asking these questions was pretty casual and not too surprising.

You two started engaging in sex a couple years ago. You were stressed about your company starting, and Hoseok was in town. He offered to help you relax, and before you knew it, he was drilling into you from behind.

Both of you agreed to stay friends but continued to have sex every now and then. It was great, you had to admit. Probably the best sex you had in your life, and it was good that you two were able to keep your friendship platonic at the same time. Only, it was sex without the romantic feelings.

To be honest, you were craving it again.

He passed you his phone again, and you tried to pick a good last question.

“Would you rather kiss me gently or kiss me aggressively?” You asked.

Hoseok paused before answering. “Depends on the mood.”

“Well, at this moment, then, what is the mood?”

You watched Hoseok’s eyes shift between your lips then your eyes.

“Aggressively.”

You hummed. “Good to know.” You passed him back his phone. “Last question.”

Hoseok chuckled, “You seriously didn’t learn anything new?”

You shrugged. “I guess not.”

He didn't seem bothered, though, when his body shifted closer to yours.

When he looked back up at you, his expression changed. Although his eyes were already an opaque shade of brown, they had darkened.

I know that look.

He smirked. “Would you rather make the first move or receive the first move?”

You bit your lip, gazing up at his body.

Before you could reconnect with his eyes, you heard his phone drop, and his lips were on yours.

Just like his answer, his kisses were aggressive and needy. You could taste the cherry cola and ice cream on his lips and mouth.

You pulled his face closer, wanting more.

Hoseok’s body language opened up, allowing you to get up and straddle his lap. You felt his hands inch up your shirt and tug at the fabric. He helped you take it off, which gave him access to your breasts.

You felt him undo your bra with a quick flick of his fingers, and you tossed it off without a care.

Hoseok let out a chuckle before claiming your lips with his.

His lips were intoxicating, and you wanted more.

“Please touch me,” you begged against his lips.

He hummed, grazing his hands down your back before roughly grabbing your ass. You moaned, and he held you against him, hard enough to feel him grind into you.

“Fuck, stop teasing,” you pulled away, and he laughed.

“Baby, I’m not teasing,” he smirked.

Baby. The term of endearment made your heart swoon.

You weren’t always this infatuated by Hoseok. But the way he came to visit you during his break, had dinner and ice cream with you, and kissed you this good—it made you want more than just a fling.

But you couldn't think that way. It was sex. You two were doing this to get off, not engage in lovemaking.

Hoseok swiped his tongue over his bottom lip, eyeing your figure. “You know what I want.”

You ran your hand up and down his chest. “What are you waiting for?”

Hoseok's hands came underneath your thighs, and he picked you up, walking you to your bedroom. He used your body to close the door, slamming you against it.

He ground himself against your core, causing you to moan louder than you expected.

You covered your mouth in embarrassment.

Hoseok chuckled, “It’s okay,” he pulled away enough to graze his thumb over your cheek, “I love it when you moan.”

You rolled your eyes, kissing him and grabbing his ass, causing him to grind on your core.

"Fuck, I can practically feel that you wet," he groaned, trying his best to hold you up and sturdy you against the door.

“B-bed,” you choked, one of his particular thrusts stroking perfectly against you.  

Hoseok moved you towards your bed and gingerly placed you down. He kissed down your bare chest and slowly took off your pants and underwear.

“Fuck, your perfect,” Hoseok awed, softly running a finger through your wet heat.

His cold finger sent a wave of pleasure through you, making you flinch.

Hoseok hummed. “So wet for me,”

He looked up at you. “May I?”

You nodded, but he only smirked.

“Words, baby,” he put a hand to his ear.

“Please,” you bit down on your lip.

You felt him spread your lips, and you clenched in response. He appeared to savour you, taking his time as he ate you out.

When you moaned, he’d hum, sending vibrations into your heat that brought you closer to your climax.

“Fuck, I’m close—”

He pulled away, licking his lips and gazing down at you.

“Hoseok—”

“You taste better than I remembered,” he commented. “But I want you to cum around me.”

God, I love his dirty talk.

You watched him take off his clothes. He must've been working out because he was more toned than six months ago.

He was about to line himself up with your entrance, but you stopped him with your foot on his chest.

You smirked. “Not yet, baby.”

You stood up. “Sit.”

Hoseok sat on the bed, your roles shifting.

“But I want—”

You interrupted his beg with your hand around his erect cock. He appeared to be speechless as you run your hand up and down his shaft.

“Hm?” You asked, chuckling lightly at how easy it was to make him submit. “What do you want, baby?”

“I-I wanted,” he stuttered, thrusting slightly into your hand, “to cum inside you.”

“Is that so?” You questioned, pulling your hand away.

Despite his vocalized want, he whined when you pulled away.

“I’m only doing what my baby wants,” you shrugged. “Condoms are in the bottom drawer on the right.”

Hoseok dashed over to the bedside table, rummaging for the condoms.

“Those should fit you, right?”

"Yes," he replied, opening the familiar wrapper and unravelling it on his erect member.  

He stood there for a minute, wrapped penis and naked, just fondly looking at your nude figure.

He whispered something under his breath.

“Hm?”

“Nothing,” Hoseok blushed. “You still want to fuck?”

“Yes.”

“Top or bottom?”

“Top please,” you smiled.

Hoseok laid down on your bed, and you climbed onto his torso.

“Fuck, you’re so wet,” he cursed as you moved off his abs and onto his cock.

A wet puddle was left on his abdomen, which he wiped away with his fingers, then putting said fingers into his mouth.

“So good,” he groaned.

You hummed in response, slowly sinking onto him.

"Fuck, you feel so good," you said when you bottomed out.

You started moving, swaying your hips back and forth. Each time Hoseok's cock would graze against your g-spot.

His hands were placed on your hips, guiding you on him. You could feel yourself clenching around him and your climax building up.

“I-I’m close,” you stuttered.

Hoseok swallowed, “Me too.”

“Ch-choke me,” you requested as you picked up your pace.

Hoseok grinned. “Only if you choke me back.”

You chuckled and rolled your eyes. Hoseok gently wrapped his hand around your neck, and you did the same, slowly applying pressure.

You felt your thighs burn from exhaustion. "F-fuck me," you cursed, slowing down.

Both of you let go of each other's neck, and Hoseok flipped you two over, still inside you.

"It's okay," Hoseok assures before resuming the pace.

His thrusts were rough and deep, and he pushed your thighs against your chest.

“Fuck, please keep going,” you begged.

“Can I choke you?” Hoseok asked.

“Please,” you replied, “do you want me to choke you too?”

“Yes,” Hoseok responded.

You felt yourself rhythmically clench around him. Hoseok must’ve realized because he began thrusting faster into you.

The room was filled with unholy noises. You could hear the wet sounds of your entrance and the impact of Hoseok’s hips against your core.

“Fuck don’t stop,” you choked out.

The knot building up in your abdomen unravelled, and pleasure and relaxation spread through your body. Your core gripped onto Hoseok like a vice.

“H-Hoseok,” you stammered, your core overstimulated.

“I-I want you to squirt,” he replied, continuing his firm thrusts.

“Oh,” you moaned.

He pounded deeper into your core, to the point where you could feel his tip ram against your cervix.

“Ah!” You screamed, feeling yourself gush around him.

“Fuck, so good,” Hoseok groaned. “I-I’m cumming.”

You felt the condom fill up inside you, and you felt disappointed that his cum couldn’t coat your walls.

His thrusts slowed down, and he stood still for a few moments.

When he pulled out, you shivered with oversensitivity. You knew that your sheets would be a mess and weren't looking forward to cleaning them when Hoseok left.

You looked up at the ceiling, breathless, while you heard Hoseok walk away from the bed.

“Where do you put your towels?” He asked.

“In the hallway, in the closet beside the dryer and washing machine.” You replied.

You heard him walk into the hallway and the closet door open and close. “Thanks,” he said. “And your bedsheets?”

“The closet in my room.”

You heard him walk back into your room, open your walk-in closet that led into your bathroom, and shuffle around. The tap ran in your bathroom for a couple seconds, then the sound of Hoseok wringing out something.

You began to sit up, but he hushed you to lie back down.

“Just relax,” he soothed, placing the clean bedsheets on your bedside table and walking over to you with a damp cloth.

“You don’t have to—”

He placed a hand on your thigh. “It’s okay,” he reassured.

You two exchanged a quick smile before Hoseok began to clean you up.

“You didn’t even cum on me,” you chuckled as he gently wiped your inner thighs.

“I know,” he replied, “but I still made you messy.”

When your thighs were no longer covered in your cum, you two changed your bedsheets.

“You good sleep in the same bed?” You asked while folding over your duvet.

“Sure,” He smiled.

You walked into your closet. "There should be some clothes that fit you. I usually wear men's clothes at home, anyways. It's crazy how great the quality men's clothes are compared to women's clothes." You picked out a t-shirt and sweatpants and tossed them at Hoseok.

He caught them, “Thanks.”

You two showered separately and spent the time getting ready together dancing to tunes.

If someone were to walk into the room, it wouldn’t look or smell like you two just had sex. You two looked like close friends having a dance party before going to bed.

Again, after you two had sex the first time, you both agreed to stay friends. It was easier said than done.

It was awkward initially, but you both were able to get past that by talking it through. Hoseok would ask how you felt during sex and what could have been better, and you would return the question.

Now, you both were able to have a good time and intimately learn more about each other.

Sure, it was strange, but it was a mutual agreement between consenting adults and fun.

The sex was fun—great, really—and you couldn’t have it any other way.

But you would be lying to yourself if you didn’t feel like something was missing.

.

.

“Good morning, everyone,” you greeted your fellow designers, “this is Hoseok. If you don’t know him already, he’s a well-known musician and one of my closest friends.”

Everyone welcomed Hoseok with a warm round of applause.

“Thank you, it’s a pleasure to be here.” Hoseok thanked.

“Hoseok will be helping out here and there while he’s vacationing here for a month,” you explained, “so take it easy on him.”

People shared chuckles at your joke.

"Anyways, let's start looking over the design ideas. You all are very talented artists, and I want you to remember that this is a draft, which means that these ideas are not final. If your idea is rejected, it's okay. We'll continue to work on a collective theme for the show."

The morning was spent listening to everyone's design concepts. To follow your reputation, the designs were contained within suits and gowns. As mentioned before, the theme was Vancouver's nature, where the fashion show would be taking place.

You and your design team used the recycled fabrics—which were separated by colours, textures, and materials—while figuring out your drafts.

You asked your design team to draft some ideas because you couldn't think of anything to present.

You were pleasantly surprised that your whole team had ideas that you approved.

“This a phenomenal,” you awed, “Great job, Erinn.”

“Actually,” you grabbed the attention of the other team members, “you all did a great job. We will be using all these ideas for the show.”

Your team shared cheers.

“Y/N,” Rachel nudged your shoulder, “I’m sorry to ask, but now that we’ve got the designs all in order, what about the models? You wanted to have various body types, right?”

“Don’t worry, I’ve got that covered,” you whispered back.

You turned back to your design team. "You all know that this show is tougher than our last one because we are trying to include more body types, genders, races, just different kinds of people. Which means that we will need to cater our clothes to the models, rather than the other way around.” You smiled, “So you all can go home for the next week.”

You heard Rachel choke on her inhale.

"Although you all have the week off, I want you all to try drawing your designs on other body types. Experiment with materials and colours. Remember to take some of the recycled fabrics home with you, and feel free to come in to pick anything up. Just let Rachel and I know in advance, and we'll give notice to the front desk so they can let you in. When we reconvene in a week, which would be next Friday at nine-thirty, I need you all to be ready to translate your designs, colours, and materials to our models." You ordered.

“Any questions?”

Comfortable silence amongst everyone.

You nodded. "Awesome. Good luck, everyone. Contact me if you have any questions."

Your team started packing up.

“Y/N, does that mean we’re spending the next week casting?” Rachel asked.

“Yes, Rachel. Please contact Westly and schedule lunch tomorrow at noon to discuss modelling criteria. It’s probably going to be pretty loose, but we need to contact Westly before sending it out.” You answered. “If he’s not free at that time, try figuring out something later tomorrow. Then book a reservation for three at Romeo’s.”

“Alright, on it,” Rachel replied.

You turned to Hoseok, who seemed shocked.

“What?” You blushed.

He continued his surprised expression. “I haven’t seen you like this before.”

You chuckled. “How else are you supposed to run a company and organize and execute a fashion show in 3 months?”

Rachel tapped you on the shoulder. "Westly can do lunch tomorrow, at noon, at Romeo's. He and his team secured the venue with Vancouver Fashion Week and are currently collaborating with the interior designers to figure out how the place will look. West said he'll debrief you tomorrow, at lunch, about the rest of the progress."

You smiled. “Great! Thank you, Rachel. You can also take the rest of the day off.”

Rachel appeared to be stunned, not responding to your words.

You waved a hand in front of her face. “Rachel? You can take the rest of the day off.”

“Are you sure, Y/N?” She asked.

You chuckled, “I wouldn’t be telling you to if I wasn’t sure, would I?”

She gave it a thought. “I guess not.”

You grinned. “Just meet me at our main building tomorrow, at eleven-thirty, and we’ll go to Romeo’s together.”

Rachel nodded. “Thank you, Y/N,”

“No worries,” you smiled.

You and Hoseok watched her leave, leaving you two alone in the studio.

“I’m sorry, it passed my mind. You’re okay not joining us for lunch tomorrow, right?” You asked Hoseok.

He dismissed your apology by brushing a hand through the air, “It’s all good. You’ve got your shit to do.” He smiled, “It gives me time to tour around a bit, anyways.”

“Good,” you replied. “So, where to?”

You pulled apart the croissant, eating pieces one at a time. The butteriness covered your tongue in a warmth that mixed well with the iced coffee you and Hoseok shared.

The park was surprisingly empty, despite it being a Friday. Usually, it would be tough to find a spot decently away from others, mostly shaded by trees.

The inlet was a few meters away, allowing you two to see sailboats pass by. People also kayaked and canoed, and you could hear their laughter faintly on land.

Here, you and Hoseok would be shielded by looming trees and away from potential fans of Hoseok. It was a rarity to have those two things when spending time with Hoseok: privacy and security—peace and quiet.

“This is what you wanted to do?” You asked, finishing off the croissant.

He nodded, sipping the iced coffee. “Yeah. It’s quiet and nice here.”

You two people watched, enjoying the breeze and serene environment.

“I was thinking,” you cleared your throat, “about last night. Did you enjoy it?”

Hoseok set down the iced coffee. “Yeah. I always like hanging out with you.”

“I mean—the sex.”

He seemed shocked by your question.

“Yeah, that was good too. Why do you ask? You never brought up before.” He pointed out.

Because I am growing feelings for my childhood friend, who I now have sex with for fun. This wasn't a part of the agreement, I know. We agreed to not grow feelings for each other and just have sex for pleasure. But it's inevitable to develop feelings for someone you have sex for, right? Like, there are probably people out there that can distinguish sex from love—and I guess it started out like that—but for us?

Am I crazy?

“No reason,” you sighed. “I just wanted to know if there was anything I could have done better.”

Hoseok turned his body to you, smiling. “It was perfect.”

He gestured with his arms for a hug, and you obliged. His cologne smelt of freshly peeled oranges; it was a pleasant fragrance, and you found yourself snuggling closer.

.

.

The past month went by in a busy blur.

The model casting went well. You and Westley found fantastic individuals to present your clothing line, which was in the process of being altered to fit those people.

The venue was secured, and the guest list was being made by You and Westley.

“Maybe invite Hoseok,” Westley suggested.  

You shook your head, “I can’t.”

"Why not?" He retorted. "The worse thing he could say is 'no,' and you can invite the whole band." He giggled. "Maybe I can meet Jimin in person."

You chuckled, “So that’s why you want me to invite Hoseok. Just because you made eye contact with Jimin for more than five seconds, it doesn’t mean that he’s into you. He’s straight.”

“How do you know?” Westley had a hand firmly on his hip.

“W-well, I haven’t asked him personally—”

"Then you can't assume he's straight!" Westley exclaimed. "The baseline isn't being heterosexual."

“True. Anyways, let’s get back to the guest list.” You chewed on your lip. “We have Harry Styles, BLACKPINK, Lizzo…”

Both of you ran down the list of a thousand attendees to the show in Vancouver. It was way smaller than fashion week or any of your previous shows, but it wasn't meant to be a big party.

Y/N [14:00]: Hey! Are you free and the boys on March 1st at 1 pm for about four hours, including an after-party until 10 pm, with food?

Hoseok [14:30]: Hiiiiii!! Sorry for the late text. I was asking the others. Yeah! That’s in 4 months? 🧐

Y/N [14:31]: Yeah, it’s for my fashion show. You can ask your company for that time? We’d provide the plane tickets and accommodation. You’d probably stay 3 days and 2 nights? You’d fly in the first day, sleep the one night, then attend the show the second day, sleep the second night, and fly out the 3rd day. I’ll need to know by the end of the week.

Hoseok [14:32]: Sounds good!!! I’ll ask my managers and let you know 👊

Y/N [14:33]: Awesome! Thanks 💚

Hoseok [14:33]: Np 💚

“So, Hoseok and the boys can come, but he has to confirm with his managers. He’ll let me know soon.” You relayed to Westley.

"Great! As long as we get confirmation from Hoseok at the end of this week, we can send out the invitations. We've checked with everyone's management, and they all seem to be busy. Worse comes to worst; we'll just have to move seats around." Westley advised.

He closed his laptop, and you followed.

“Alright, that seems to be all of the guest list business. I’ll get my team to start organizing plane tickets and accommodation.” He sighed, “shall we head to the studio to check on the design team?”

“Yes,” you replied.

Both of you were driven to the studio to check on the design team.

The studio was filled with models of various shades and shapes. Music played quietly in the background, and your coworkers and models grooved to the tunes. Designers pinned fabrics around people’s figures and sketched down measurements and ideas.

You and Westley went around checking on everyone, making sure gowns and suits were well in progress. A smaller group of people created ideas for shoes and were sending them out to shoemakers.

The rest of the day was spent getting to know the models, fixing measurements, finalizing some ideas, and briefing everyone about the plan for the next two months.

"Please have the gowns, suits, and shoes by the end of this month so we can start having the makeup artists consult all of you; to make sure the makeup correlates with the clothes and the models." You informed. "Thank you, everyone, for your amazing work."

Scattered “thank you”s responded, and our workday was over.

“You want to get some drinks?” Westley nudged.

You nodded, frankly too tired to answer but eager for a drink.

Both of you decided to walk to the high-class bar, which allowed private areas in the back for paying customers. You and Westley sat alone, away from the crowds of people near the entrance of the bar.

“To having a productive three months,” Westley sang, holding up his martini.

You sighed, “Cheers,” you tapped your peach Bellini glass against his, admitting a chime.

"Fuck," Westley cursed at the sip of his drink, "they're always stronger than I remember. "Anyways, the show is pretty much underway. Guestlist is handled, the venue is prepped and ready for us, the clothing is almost done. Oooo, I can’t wait to see it all together.”

You nodded.

“You don’t seem so excited, Y/N.”

“I am,” you replied.

“But?”

“I am excited.” You affirmed, although not living up to the word

Westley silenced, knowing when not to push your buttons.

He took a careful sip of his martini. “Where’s Hoseok?”

You fidgeted with your glass. "Hoseok went back to Korea. He only had a month of vacay, so," you left the sentence adrift.

“Did you enjoy his company?”

“Can we not talk about him right now? I rather not mix work and personal life.” You stated.

Westley acknowledged with a firm nod, finishing off his martini and asking for another.

“May I ask a question?”

“Sure.” You replied.

He cringed. “But if I ask, promise me you won’t fire me.”

You turned to him. “Depends on your question. You have to ask me first, then I can decide whether or not to fire you. I cannot make promises.”

“Why are you so off all of a sudden?” He genuinely asked.

You took a deep breath. “I’m not going to fire you, not for a long time. You’re my best worker, and I can’t let you go.”

"I feel like there's going to be a 'but' somewhere. Might as well rip off the Band-Aid." Westley sighed.

You nodded, “You’re right. And you’re right about my mood. I’ve been kind of off lately.”

“Because of Hoseok?”

"Yeah, to be honest." You admitted. "I feel like we're really close—more than just friends. We're on the same wavelength, you know? And whenever we're apart for a long time and then meet up again, it's like time has passed."

“And let me guess, you haven’t told him because you’re afraid to ruin your friendship.”

You scoffed. “There’s no need for sarcasm, West.”

He rolled his eyes and sighed. “I’m just saying, it’s the oldest narrative in the book. One friend is falling for the other, and that one friend doesn’t want to confess their feelings because they’ve known the other person for years and are afraid of ruining that connection.” He took a sip of his martini. “But in the end, it’s two friends just pining over their feelings of love for each other.”

“But we’re different.” You argued.

"I guess so. The narrative doesn't really specify one friend is a famous fashion designer and the other being a famous musician—"

“I mean,” you interrupted, “we have sex every time we see each other.

Westley's mouth fell open in a silent gasp. His hand was placed on his chest, and his eyes stared into yours.

He tipped back his martini into his mouth, finishing it off. “Well, you didn’t mention the friends with benefits part.”

“I know!” You groaned. “That’s why it’s so complicated.”

"Is it really, though? Wouldn't confessing your feelings after you two have had sex so much make it slightly easier? Because it makes sense to grow feelings for someone you've known for a while and have had sex with on multiple occasions." Westley speculated.

“I didn’t say we had sex on multiple occasions—”

“Honey,” he began, “you said you’ve had sex with him every time you see each other, and you two meet a lot. It doesn’t take a detective to figure it out.”

"Anyways," he digressed, "the sooner you tell him, the better. There's no use debating over it for years, then finding out he's found someone else when he would've picked you anyways."

"Gosh, when you say it like that, it sounds like a romantic movie." You cringed, finishing your peach Bellini.

He shrugged. “Well, it kinda is.”

You chuckled. “Well, thanks for the advice.”

“Thank you for filling me in,” he smiled.

.

.

The week went by fast. Your design team was still working on alterations, so you were left brainstorming hair and makeup and contacting specialists in those fields.

You were sitting at home, knee-deep in Pinterest boards when your phone buzzed.

You stopped strolling through your laptop and peered down.

Hoseok [19:30]: We can come to your show!

Y/N [19:30]: Fantastic! I'll let my team know, and we’ll send out the invites.

You texted Westley, informing him that BTS could attend the show.

Westley [19:33]: Great! I'll let the rest of the team know, and we'll send the emails out tomorrow

Y/N [19:34]: Thanks!

Westley [19:35]: Np

You set down your phone and continued to add ideas to your private Pinterest board.

Your phone buzzed again.

Hoseok [19:55]: What are you doing right now?

You were puzzled.

Y/N [19:56]: Nothing much, just brainstorming ideas for the show. You?

Hoseok [19:57]: Just chilling in my room.

Hoseok [20:05]: I miss you

You chuckled at the text, thinking that Hoseok was drunk.

Y/N [20:05]: I miss you too, Hobi.

Hoseok [20:08]: …how much?

Again, you were puzzled by his text.

Y/N [20:10]: Wdym? I miss having you here? Is that what you mean?

Hoseok [20:11]: I mean, do you miss me intimately?

Y/N [20:14]: Like sex-wise?

Hoseok [20:14]: Fuck, I need you, Y/N.

You stared at his words.

Hoseok [20:18]: I miss your body and how perfectly you fit around me.

Your cheeks flushed.

Hoseok [20:21]: Can you video chat? Unless you’re not in the mood.

You panicked.

You were in the mood but weren't presentable. Your hair was messy, and you weren't wearing any makeup, and you were dressed in a hoodie and sweatpants.

Y/N [20:23]: Yeah, I’m in the mood. Just give me 5 mins.

You quickly got out of your seat and ran to your bedroom. You sifted through your closet and found the sexist clothing item you had: a red lingerie set. You quickly undressed and put on the set.

You looked into your full-length mirror and tried not to cringe. Your hair was a mess, and you weren’t wearing any makeup. It definitely looked like Hoseok's text came out of nowhere—and it did, but you somehow expected yourself to be decently presentable.

However, the lingerie set was doing you favours. The set was composed of a crotchless thong and a bralette that exposed your nipples.

Y/N [20:28]: I’m ready.

Your phone rang, and you answered, quickly propping it on your drawers across from your bed.

You were faced with a shirtless Hoseok, his cock already in his hand.

“Fuck, you look amazing.” He complimented breathlessly.

“Wow, you’re ahead of the game—and really? I’m a mess.” You chuckled.

He hissed, flinching in his grip. “Fuck, just take the compliment, Y/N.”

You cleared your throat. “Thank you.”

You sat a pit forward, angling your breasts towards the camera.

“What are you imagining, baby?” You purred.

“Y-You,” he stuttered, moving his hand up and down his cock.

“Mhm,” you moaned, “thinking up my pussy clenching around your cock, making it all wet.”

He nodded.

"You can do something if you want," he suggested. "You said you were in the mood."

Your eyes opened wide. “Wait a minute.”

You brought the phone with you on your journey, going back to your closet and fetching your dildo, lube, and vibrator. You hurried to the bathroom and propped your phone up against the closed door.

You suctioned the bottom of the dildo onto the titled floor. You placed the vibrator on the bathroom counter.

“You want to watch me bounce on this dildo and think of you?” You smirked, rubbing lube onto your hands, onto the toy, and onto your vagina.  

“Fuck, yes,” he replied, stilling his hand around his cock for a moment.

“Did I say you could stop?” You spat.

“I’m waiting for you,” he smiled, making your heart melt.

You paused over the dildo, smiling back at him. “Awww, that’s actually kinda sweet. Thank you.”

You quickly washed your hands and grabbed the vibrator.  

You crouched down and slowly onto the dildo.

“Fuck,” you moaned, tilting your head back at the feeling of being filled up. It didn’t hit the spots Hoseok did, but it was good enough.

You lifted yourself up and sunk back down again, rhythmically repeating the motion.

“Fuck, so good,” you sighed, overlooking the pain in your knees.

“That's right, baby, imagine me filling that pussy up," Hoseok groaned, following your rhythm while pumping his cock.

“Fuck yes,” you replied, “and I’m clenching around you so tight.”

You two exchanged moans at the sound of your pussy squelching around the dildo.

“Use the vibrator, baby,” Hoseok purred.

You hummed, grabbing the rose gold vibrator and turning it on. You place the buzzing toy on your clit, feeling pleasure rippling through your core.

“Fuck,” you hissed, speeding up your pace a bit.

“I-I’m getting close.”

“Yeah, baby?” Hoseok smirked. “You get off at me rubbing my cock? Imagining me buried inside your pussy, making you feel so good?"

You nodded. “But it’s not as you, baby.”

“I know—” He choked, appearing to be on the brink of his climax. “I fucking miss the way your pussy fit so well around me, no matter how many times I fucked you open.”

“Mhm,” you bit your lips, watching him with hooded eyes. “Don’t stop.”

“Who knew you were filthy enough to cum during cybersex?" He observed. "I'm not even there to touch you, but just thinking of me inside has you in ruins.”

“What would you do if I was with you right now?” You asked.

“I would fuck you until you couldn’t walk the next day,” he replied, “I’d fuck you until that pretty pussy is swollen.”

"F-fuck, I'm going to cum," you stuttered, feeling the familiar build-up in your core.

“M-me too,” he stammered.

You watched his head tilt back in pleasure and his cum squirt up from his cock.

“Fuck!” You cursed, feeling your pleasure shoot out of your core and onto the floor

“So hot,” Hoseok sighed.

You chuckled, coming down from high. You pulled yourself up and off the dildo, sitting on the cool tile floor.

“Fuck, did you squirt?” He asked, looking closer.

You nodded, gesturing to the mess on the ground.

“Spread your legs for me, baby,” he commanded and obliged, showing him your battered cunt.

You spread your lips, and he hummed at sight.

“So beautiful.” He awed.

“You happy? I need to wipe this all up, now,” you scoffed.

He chuckled. “It’s not my fault that you cummed.” He angled his phone to the floor, showing splashes of his cum on the floor, "and besides, you also made me make a mess.”

You both chatted while cleaning up your messes, talking about your days as if nothing happened. After finishing your clean-up, you two continued your conversation while showering, as if both of you were doing it together.

Ready to relax for the night, both of you signed off with exchanged ‘thanks’ and ‘good night.’

You turned off your phone with a soft click and stepped out of the steamy bathroom. Your pyjamas were soft on your skin, and you felt ready to go to bed.

Hopping onto your bed, you grabbed your laptop and turned on some Netflix to fall asleep to.

From an outsider’s perspective, masturbating with your best friend and then casually talking with them while showering and getting ready for bed was odd. Repeating the scenario in your mind did make it sound like you two were in a long-distance romantic relationship rather than a platonic one.

But you and Hoseok were different. That was your excuse.

A friend could do this and not catch feelings. You two were the perfect example of that.

Emphasis on were because you were currently spiralling in your growing romantic feelings for Hoseok.

But what would you do in this situation?

You and your childhood friend engage in sex one time and promise each other to not grow feelings. In this manner, you two could have sex without attachment. Fast forward into the future, and you both are still making this arrangement with no negative consequences and feel like you two have gotten to know each other better and have become better friends—until you catch feelings. And you don’t want to risk losing this relationship you two have.

Because he is a worldwide musician who can’t be tied down because it could risk his career, and he might lose fans—and you couldn't be bothered with any romantic commitment with your fast-paced and unpredictable work schedule.

So, you stay in this unnameable mess.

.

.

“Time flies by when you’re having fun,” Allie commented from the plush couch.

You looked in the mirror, twisting your back towards it to see the back of the dress. “I guess so.”

“You have to admit, planning a fashion show is pretty fun,” she said. “If it wasn’t, you wouldn’t be doing it over and over again.”

“True,” you replied, turning to the stylist.

“May I see the other dress?” You asked, and the stylist nodded, retreating to somewhere in the shop you couldn’t see.

It was the last month until the show. Everything was in order: the show’s venue and its decorations, the clothes, makeup and hair for the models, and the guests’ accommodation. Now, it was your turn to find suitable attire for the occasion.

You tried on the next dress. It was a slim-fitting number, with a leg slit in the front. It was scandalous and stunning, but not right for the show.

“I don’t like any of these dresses,” you sighed, annoyed.

Allie appears to brainstorm some ideas.

“Maybe try a suit?” She proposed.

You kept your eyes on the mirror, twirling your figure and watching the fabric move at your feet.

“Think about it,” she began, “think of all the powerful women who’ve worn suits and killed it. Zendaya, Kristen Stewart, Blake Lively, Awkwafina. The list goes on. It’s a statement piece, and you’re the big brain behind this operation.”

“I think it’s ‘mastermind behind this operation,’ but I get what you mean.” You corrected.

“You literally bypassed my whole point—”

“I know, I know,” you interrupted. “It’s just—suits for women are so overpriced. And it’s just like the dresses, except a different fit. Same colour palettes, same materials, so on.”

Allie scoffed. "You're a fucking fashion designer, did you forget? Make your own thing. There are leftover fabrics at your studio; you have time to make something." Her face lit up, “And, technically, it’s for free.”

You gave it a thought, but the stylist came back before you could finish it.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Vega, but I’m not finding anything, and I don’t want you walking back and forth and bringing me more dresses.” You gave an apologetic smile. “Thank you very much for your help.”

"No worries, Y/N! Just hang up the dress when you take it off, and I’ll deal with the rest,” she replied.

“Will do,” you said, and she stepped out of the room.

Allie helped you unzip the gown, and you shimmed out of it. You did as you were told and hung up the dress, and you and Allie left the shop.

The walk back to the studio was quick, you two making determined strides through the crowded city.

You and Allie entered the empty studio, turning on the nights.

The studio was organized chaos with dressed mannequins, big boxes of fabrics in the back of the room, and papered patterns on the tables.

“Wow,” Allie awed.

"Yeah," you replied, leading you both to your master station is near the back, "it's crazy what a couple months before a show looks like.”

You looked through the drawers beside your desks and grabbed the tools you'll need to plan out the suit.

“So, just a suit jacket and pants…” You said, grabbing some paper to sketch up your pattern.

You looked up at Allie, “Do you mind helping me out with measurements?”

She nodded, “For sure. What do you need?”

You guided Allie on how to measure your proportions for the suit. She measured your inseams for your pants, the sleeves, the cuts, and so on. In between, you'd write down the dimensions for the patterns.

You two sifted through the fabrics to create a monochrome patchwork outfit. The suit would be shades of cherry red, with different materials making it up. There were no patterns in the patchwork, only various tones of red in several types of wool.

“Fucking hell,” Allie cursed while sifting through the materials, “who would’ve thought there were so many shades of red.”

She held up a piece of recycled fabrics, checking with you that it was the correct tone. You took it and held the portion against the others.

“Nope, too dark,” you shook your head.

"What? It looks exactly the same," she disagreed, walking over to your table. When comparing the fabrics, she made an 'aaah’ sound, letting you know that you were right.

Before sectioning off your pattern, you tried your best to evenly sew all the material together into a quilt-like form.

“Jesus,” you muttered, shaking out your sore hands.

“We don’t have to get this all done today, you know. You do have two months left.” Allie advised.

"I know. I just want to put this all together first," you replied, continuing to push the material through the sewing machine.

“Alright,” she surrendered, bringing one of the seats over to your table.

You sewed in silence for a bit.

“So,” Allie began, “how are you and Hoseok doing?”

You paused. “What do you mean?”

“You know…you two and your arrangement.”

You scoffed, “Our arrangement? You mean us having sex?”

“Yeah, but the other stuff.”

You pulled your hands from the sewing machine, crossing your arms over your chest. "Just spit it out, Al."

“Well, you’ve had mixed feelings with Hoseok, right? Like you’re starting to like him?” She speculated.

Your mouth gaped open. “Have you been talking to West?”

She didn’t respond, not making eye contact.

“You can’t be fucking serious. You two are ganging up on me!” You yelled.

“Y/N, we’re just worried.”

“About what? I have feelings—and?” You fumed.

She sighed. “You shouldn’t be having sex with someone if you’re growing romantic feelings, especially if you two agreed to be platonic.”

“Oh, fuck off,” you stood.

“Y/N!” She exclaimed. "Don't you dare talk to me that way? I am your friend, not your enemy." Allie stood up and sighed. “I get it. You don’t like people in your business. That’s fair. I just feel like you're sacrificing yourself for Hoseok when you could talk about it with him."

“Allie, you don’t know what you’re fucking talking about.” You spat.

“I get it,” she sympathized. “I don’t. I’m not you or Hoseok.”

“So, tell me,” she said. “Educate me on the situation. I am not here to judge. I’m just worried about you, that’s all.”

You took a few deep breaths, trying to calm yourself down.

“I’m sorry,” you apologized. “I shouldn’t have talked to you like that.”

“It’s okay,” she forgave, “just don’t push me away so fast, okay?”

“Okay.” You agreed.

She sat down, “So?”

You sat down and rehashed your feelings about you and Hoseok to her: the growing romantic feelings for him, not knowing what to do, and wanting something more.

“Well, do you think it’d work out between you two if you dated?” She asked.

You shifted in your seat. "I honestly don't know. It's tough with Hoseok's work because he has a loyal fanbase. I'm afraid he's going to get even more hate if we were to date.”

“But would you two be happy?” She asked.

You gave it a thought. “What do you mean?”

“Well, you go into a relationship regardless of other people. Whether you’re a celebrity or an ordinary person, you date someone for you and that person; no one else. There are going to be people who support and hate your relationship no matter what. What matters is what the two people think in the relationship."

She sighed. “You cannot control what others will think about you. No matter what you do or who you do, you're going to upset someone. So, just do what feels comfortable and safe with you."

You hummed, understanding.

“So, would you be happy if you and Hoseok dated?”

“Yes.” You stated without a thought. “I really like him—love him even.”

"Then that's all that matters," Allie replied.

.

.

The week before, the show crept on you faster than you expected. You, your team of designers and event organizers, models, hairstylists and makeup artists flew into Vancouver a week early to prepare on location.

However, the majority of the week would be spent preparing for the show. The first day was spent unloading all of the outfits and equipment for the show into the venue. Everyone was required to show up to organize their stations and to familiarize themselves with the venue.

“Please set up your stations while Westley and I look into the main runway and after part section. We’ll be back in around two hours to check up on everyone. If you have any questions while we're gone, please contact me on my phone." You held up your cellphone and everyone nodded. "Great. Good luck, everyone!"

The venue and interior designers' owners toured you and Westley around the place, showing you the drawn floorplans, running down the prices, and checking that the decorations correlated with your plans.

“These weren’t the chairs we sent over,” Westley pointed to the black folded chairs lining the runways.

“Yes, but these were within the price range and—” One of the interior designers, Queeny, said.

“But did we get an email regarding this change?” You interjected.

Queeny exchanged looks with the other three decorators, and they shook their heads.

Wesley let out an angry sigh. "Well, I guess we’ll have to live with these then.” He sat down on one of the chairs. “At least they’re comfortable. They look cheap, but they’re sturdy.”

“Are there any more changes you made without informing as?” You asked.

They all shook their heads.

"Great." You turned to one of the two-venue owners, named Ruby. "Shall we continue to the after-party part?”

“Yes,” she replied, gesturing to the doorway that led to the front reception area.

From the reception area, where guests would check-in and get a wristband, a double-door way on the right led to a ballroom for the after-party.

The overall theme of the place was classic European designs with off-white luxurious walls and chandeliers. The ceilings were intricately carved, and the floors were a smooth white oak. Just walking around made you feel like you were dirtying the place.

“This place is stunning,” Westley whispered.

“I know,” you replied, “you chose the place.”

“I know,” he smiled, pretending to flip his hair.

You both chuckled, continuing to follow the owners around the venue.

Everything worked out, besides the chairs, so you and Westley checked on the designers, models, hairstylists and makeup artists.

At the end of the workday, everyone was in order and ready for the next three days of dress rehearsals and solving and problems.

You arrived back at your hotel with sore feet and exhaustion.

Your phone rang as you flopped onto your bed.

You answered. “Hobi!”

“Y/N! How was your flight to Vancouver?” He asked.

“It was good. We didn't have a rest day, though. We had to settle into the place and check it over. My feet are so sore.” You groaned.

“Really? I thought you’d at least have a rest day when you guys arrived,” he assumed.

You shook your head. “No. Sadly, this whole week will be walking around and making sure everything is going smoothly.”

He sighed. “Shit. That sucks.” You heard him shift on the other side of the phone. “Do you want to relax?”

You laughed. “Jung Hoseok, did you seriously booty call me from across the world?”

Hoseok gasped, "I did not! I was talking about watching Netflix or something." He chuckled, "You're so dirty-minded."

You both laughed.

“Okay, so what do you want to watch?” He asked on the other end of the call.

You brought out your laptop and scrolled through the movie selection.

“Oooo! Let’s watch Hush. I’ve heard so many good things about it.” You recalled.

You could hear his hesitation.

Hoseok did not like being scared. Whenever you watched anything scary, you were afraid that your neighbours would complain at how loud his screaming was. As you remembered saying "hello" to him once and him screaming in fear and surprise, he was also easily frightened.

“We don’t have to,” you said.

“No, no,” Hoseok reassured, “we’ll watch it. Just send me the Netflix Party link, and I'll ready the Zoom link."

You giggled. “You don’t have to be brave for me, Hobi. I know you don’t like scary movies.”

“You want to watch it, so let’s do it,” he said, “and the ratings are good.”

“Okay,” you digressed. “I’m texting you the link right now.”

“Same,” he replied.

You two hung up and joined the links.

“Hello!” Hoseok beamed, dancing.

You rolled your eyes and chuckled at his burst of energy. “Hello, Hobi.”

You carried your laptop to the bathroom and began getting ready for bed.

“How was your day?” You asked.

Hoseok described him and his bandmates' film day for "Run! BTS," and you groaned at all the work they had to do.

He laughed. “But we got to play games, which was fun. We laughed so much that my abs hurt.” You watched him lift up his shirt and show his toned abdomen.

Your core felt a familiar flutter.

“W-wow, that must be a lot of laughing,” you cleared your throat and took out your toothbrush and toothpaste.

For the moment, the time difference worked for you two because it was almost ten at night for you and nearly three in the afternoon for him.

“Should I turn off my camera?” You asked before undressing to get into the shower.

He shook his head. “I’m okay with you leaving it on. I’ve seen you naked before, so it’s not really different. But if you’re uncomfortable, you can just turn it off.”

You shrugged and began taking off your clothes in full view of the camera and screen.

You noticed Hoseok’s expression.

“Enjoying the show?” You chuckled, finally taking off your undergarments and fully exposing yourself.

Hoseok smirked, “Don’t act like you weren’t just turned on by my abs. I saw how you looked at me.”

You nodded and surrendered. “Fair point.”

You hoped in the shower, and you two continued talking.

“Jesus, we haven’t started the movie yet,” Hoseok commented while you were washing your hair.

“Shit, right,” you laughed, massaging the shampoo into your scalp.

After you hoped out of the shower and dried your body and hair, you both started to watch the movie.

“This is a pretty cool premise. Like, we’ve never seen a deaf person in a horror movie before,” you regarded.

"True, that's a good point—AHHHHHH!" Hoseok screamed at the sudden slam in the movie.

You burst into laughter.

“Holy shit!” He exclaimed, trying to calm himself with controlled breaths.

The movie continued as you finished off your skincare and put on your pyjamas.

The oversized t-shirt was long enough to cover your thighs.

“You’re going to watch this before bed?” Hoseok gasped.

You chuckled. “Yeah. It’s not that scary.” You say as you jump at the sound of breaking glass in the film.

Hoseok laughed at the coincidental timing.

You don’t remember falling asleep, but you woke up to the sound of your alarm.

“Shit,” you grumbled and turned it off.

You heard Hoseok stir awake on the Zoom call.

Both of you had fallen asleep, but Hoseok finished the movie before you could; because you saw the end credits paused in the Netflix Party.

“Sorry,” you whispered.

“It’s okay,” Hoseok mumbled, squinting at the screen.

“I’ll let you sleep,” you smiled, hovering your cursor over the "send" button.

He softly smiled, “thank you.” He snuggled into his pillow, “I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you too, Hobi,” you replied, ending the call for both of you.

It didn’t hit you until you were halfway through your dress rehearsal, but Hoseok had stayed with you while you slept. He didn't wake you but quietly continued the movie and fell asleep.

Hoseok was usually sweet, so you didn't pay too much attention to it.

But it did make you feel special.

.

.

It was the day of the fashion show, and you were fucking nervous.

You had done this before, a show, but this one was different. You had put in so much effort and were proud of how it turned out but were afraid of what other people would think.

“It’ll be fine, don’t worry,” Allie assured through video call,” it’ll be excellent, and everyone won’t stop talking about it.”

“Probably,” you replied, putting on your makeup.

“It will be excellent, Y/N. I am so sure I will bet money.” She stated.

You chuckled, "then I'll take your word for it because I am not bidding money.”

You both laughed.

“Okay, I know I already showed you my outfit, but are you sure it looks good?” She asked, putting on the A-line floor-length dress she’d shown you before. It was a beautiful viridian green with lace shoulder straps that draped over the sides of her biceps.

“You look beautiful,” you complimented, setting your makeup with setting spray and heading to your closet.

You put on the suit you made and looked in the mirror. You looked a bad bitch.

“You look great! Oooo, put on the red bottoms,” Allie squealed.

You put on the signature Louis Vuitton black high heels with the ruby bottoms.

Your phone buzzed.

“I got to go; Westley is here with our ride to the venue. I’ll see you there!”

“See you!” She waved, ending the call.

You did a quick check in the mirror, fixing your hair, grabbed your bags, and headed out the door.

Your driver waited outside the vehicle as you approached, and opened its door, showing you a well-dressed and excited Westley.

"Oh my god, you look great!" He gasped. “When did you make the suit?”

“I finished it a week before we flew out,” you chuckled, “and you look great too! I love the pine on you.”

You took a step back and looked at Westley’s crisp pine-coloured suit with matching brown dress shoes.

“Thank you,” he grinned. “Okay, get in before we become late.”

You hopped into the car, and your driver got in and started the vehicle.

The drive was spent recalling your opening and closing speeches with Westley and the show's agenda.

“So, five pm is when the show ends, and then the guests for the after-party go into the ballroom area. Food is served at six pm, and everything is wrapped up at ten pm.” Westley relayed.

You nodded, “Yup.”

Both of you arrived a couple hours before the start time, which was at 1 pm, to set everything up and warm up the models and crew.

Westley checked the organizers and the models while you went to the runway area to check the lights and sound.

"Let's rerun the lights, please!" You announced as you walked into the runway room. "Can I get a headset, please?" You ask the crew on the ground, who nodded.

“Yup!” You heard the lighting crew respond.

You were given the headset, and you heard the head light technician’s voice.

“Can you hear me?” They checked.

“Yes,” you confirmed.

They ran by the six light settings for the show, and it was all correct.

“It’s perfect, thank you. Can you please check that the sound is alright?” You asked through the headset.

“Yup. You’ll have to hand the headset to another person, though, and we’ll give you a mic.” They added.

You heard their muffled voice as if they covered their mic's headset with their hand. Next, you had someone hand you a mic and take your headset.

“You’ll need to stand on the stage,” The person said.

“Okay,” you replied, going to the runway and standing on the end portion.

All the room’s lights turned on, and you could see the lighting crew’s area in the back and the chair organized around the runway.

“You can speak into the mic!” You heard someone shout.

You started speaking nonsense in the mic, like the type of weather outside, as they adjusted the volume.

“Thank you!” Someone shouted.

“Thanks,” you said into the mic before handing it to one of the crew.

“Is there anything to report? Any problems that arose before I got here?” You asked the crew.

They all shook their heads.

“How is everyone feeling?” You asked.

They all shared nervous laughter, and a few people said “good.”

“Alright, if there’s anything you all need, just come to the modelling area and ask me. It’s in the backroom.”

They all nodded, and you left them to their business.

You arrived in the backroom and saw designers fitting their outfits on the models and makeup artists and hairstylists prepping their stations.

“How is everybody doing?!” You enthusiastically asked.

They cheered with a mix of excitement and nervousness.

"I get it. Everyone is on their toes. You all have an hour left to set things up before people start filing in. Remember, the show starts at 1 pm. The door opens thirty minutes before them.”

They call responded with various forms of understanding, and you went around to check on them individually.

Rachel came and taped your shoulder, with a headset on, “So, the guards are in their posts, and the front is ready to check people in.”

“Is there a line already?” You asked.

Rachel pressed down the headset, asking the crew on the other end.

“Yes, there’s a line of people outside,” she reported, “about twenty people, so far.”

"Shit, yeah, let them in. It's probably cold." You ordered.

“I’ll tell them,” she replied.

“Okay, everyone! We’re starting to let people in. Again, you all have about an hour left, so try to wrap things up and relax. Thank you!” You announced.

Again, sounds of understanding, and you, Westley, and Rachel left the backroom.

“Rachel, Westley and I are going to check that the ballroom area and catering are all handled. Please check in with the front desk to see how they're doing, and then meet us in the ballroom." You told.

“Got it, Y/N,” Rachel answered, walking past the two of you and towards the front area.

Westley appeared impressed. “She's terrific. She's even got the headset and everything."

"I know, right? She's cool." You remarked.

Like clockwork, you and Westley ran over the details and schedule for the catering and the after-party. Everyone had places to sit, with elegantly decorated name cards.

Everything was ready.

"Fantastic, thank you," you thanked the caterers and the staff in the ballroom. "Feel free to come into the runway area during the show if you all would like to watch."

With that, it was about time the show would start. You and Westley hurried backstage, where you both were handed microphones.

The lights dimmed, and classical music played—fitting the theme of elegance and high class.

You and Westley regarded each other, did an excellent handshake, and strutted out on the runway. Both of you were met with applause from the crowd and blinding spotlights.

You two walked to the end of the runway and let out an exhausted sigh.

The music quieted, faintly heard in the background.

“And that’s why I’m not a model,” Westley joked, causing the crowd to giggle.

“Same here,” you chuckled.

“Anyways, welcome to the show, everyone!” You cheered, and the crowd clapped. “As you know, I am Y/N, and this is Westley. Today, we’ll be showing recycled elegant clothes on people. Not just models, but people. All the clothes you'll be seeing here today are made from recycled fabrics and hand-crafted by our design team and me."

Applause.

"We wanted to represent people, so we got people to present our clothes. Redundant, I know, but the fashion industry rarely shows models that look like people. Don’t get me wrong, they’re all fantastic. However, this show will be different. Enjoy!” Westley waved.

A final round of applause while you and Westley walked off the runway.

The show went smoothly and wonderfully. The changes were fluid, and there were no clothing mishaps. The classical music turned into upbeat music that everyone seemed to groove to. Models danced on the runway while walking, and there were joyful cheers in the crowd.

In the end, you and Westley gave your brief thank you speeches, and months of planning and work were officially completed.

When everyone was backstage, you all collectively cheered.

“Phenomenal job, everyone!” You praised. “I am speechless at how well we all did. Thank you all for being such wonderful people to work with.”

Smiles and cheers were shared as everyone got ready for the after-party.

“Okay, remember that food is being served at six o’clock, and you all will be able to find your names at a table.” You reminded.

You and Westley did a quick check-up on people before heading to the ballroom area to socialize.

“Great job, you two!” Some complimented.

You and Westley thanked the praise and had a small talk with some colleges.

“Hey, Y/N!” You heard a familiar voice say.

You turned and say Hoseok with the rest of the boys, waving.

“Hey!” You smiled, nudging Westley to join you.

"Well, enjoy the after-party," Westley grinned at the other guests before joining you.

As always, the seven boys were well-dressed in designer suits. Hoseok wore lightly tinted shades paired with a dark suit and floral dress shirt. His hair was wavy.

“That was awesome, Y/N,” Namjoon said.

“Thank you!” You replied.

“Yeah, Y/N, I loved the recycled-fabrics idea. Are anything on sale?” Taehyung asked.

You nodded. "Everything will be on sale next month. I'll send you the dates, so you mark them in your calendar. The clothes go fast," you chuckled.

“Damn,” Taehyung remarked, eyebrows raised.

“Hey, Jimin,” Westley greeted.

“Hey West,” Jimin smiled, “loved your speech today. That suit looks great on you.”

“I know,” Westley smirked, “you look good too.”

"How are you feeling?" Hoseok asked, letting Westley and Jimin casually flirt.

You sighed. “Glad that it’s over, to be honest. It was fun, of course, but it's a lot of work to organize."

“Oh my god, is that Charlie Puth?” Jungkook gasped, hiding slightly behind Namjoon.

Everyone laughed.

"You should go and say 'hi,' Kook. You've already met and sung with him before. You two are practically friends." Yoongi expressed.

“True,” you agreed, “and Charlie’s a nice guy.”

“Okay,” Jungkook straightened his posture, “I’ll do it.”

You all watched Jungkook walk over and begin chatting with Charlie Puth.

“God, he’s grown up so much,” Seokjin sighed.

The rest of you caught up and chatted about the show.

Before you knew it, Westley was poking your side to let you know it was five minutes until six.

“Shit,” you cursed. “Sorry to cut this convo short, but Westley and I have to announce dinner. We’ll talk soon!”

You all said your goodbyes, and you and Westley went up to the front to state it was time for food.

You two were seated with Rachel, Allie, and a couple others. Everyone ordered off a menu, which served various kinds of pasta, salads, and a mix of alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverages.

It was an excellent way to end off the show.

There was a dancefloor, too, where people could groove to music after eating.

Of course, the seven boys went to the dancefloor, which caused others to join.

You were finishing off your fettuccine alfredo when Hoseok danced over to your table. You chuckled as he held his hand out and quirked a brow.

“You’re ridiculous,” you said, taking his hand.

“You love it,” he smirked, pulling you off your chair and leading you to the dancefloor.

You danced together, along with your friends. He held your hands as you two swayed to the slow songs and body-rolled with you during the upbeat songs. Of course, a few BTS songs played, and everyone tried to follow the known choreography. You went back to your table for a drink of water, and Allie came with you. "Look, and you and Hoseok dancing up a storm," she teased. “Shut up,” you chuckled. “The chemistry is there, Y/N,” she commented. You drank your water. "Not now, Al." “Come on! He’s here for, what, the night and then gone tomorrow morning? When will you see him again?” She asked. You paused, honestly unsure when you'd see Hoseok again. “Now or never, Y/N. How much longer can you debate this?” “I know,” you replied. “I’ll do it later tonight.” Around nine-thirty, the party was dying down, with only a few guests scattered around the venue helping to clean up. You made eye contact with Allie, who was tending to the chairs, who nudged towards Hoseok’s direction. Now or never. You said in your head. “Can I speak to you, Hoseok?” You asked, walking up to him. “For sure!” He replied. You led both of you to a secluded part of the venue, away from listeners. “Did you enjoy the show?” You asked. “Yeah! You did a fantastic job, Y/N. I love how everything turned out, the colours, the recycled fabrics were great—and your suit! I can’t believe you made it,” Hoseok complimented, stepping back to look at your attire. “Thank you,” you blushed. You gave a quick look around to make sure no one was around. “Is everything alright, Y/N? You’re looking around as if they’re spies around.” He gasped. “Are there spies around? What secret don’t they know?” “I don’t want to have sex with you anymore.” You abruptly stated. A stretch of silence. Hoseok’s expression was a mixture of surprise and concern. “What?” “I can’t have sex with you anymore.” “You can’t or don’t want to? Is it something I did?” “Yes? No? In a way?” You pondered. You took a few deep breaths. "I like you, Hoseok—possibly even love you.” You ran your hand through your hair. “I know we agreed not to catch feelings, so I think we should stop having sex.” You watched his expression shift from some form of being happy to disappointment. “You know I cannot date with work,” he explained, "with the fans, touring, and whatnot, I cannot date someone. And you have your company to work on." “I know,” you replied. “But do you like me back?” You asked. “I do—” “You do?” You were on the verge of hugging him, but he stepped back. You looked at him, confused. “We can’t—” “Why?” “I literally just told you, Y/N. With work, dating wouldn’t allow it. I already have people—” He choked on his words. “People who wish I was dead, j-just for being me.” “Hoseok—” You reached out to him, but he gently pushed you away. “No,” he objected, “I’m fine. I just don’t want to add you to the mess.” “You can’t decide that for me.” You retorted. “I understand that you don’t want to add me to it, but I’m okay with it. I don't care what other people would say about us. They're not in the relationship, we are—" “But what if I care?” He said, almost too quiet for you to hear. “I’m the happy guy of BTS, who’s dedicated to his work.” “But are you truly happy?” You peered into him. “Yeah,” he replied, avoiding eye contact, “but it gets really hard sometimes.” “So, let me help, Hoseok,” you pleaded. "I don't need to be helped! I'm not another project for you to work on.” He thundered. “You know that’s not what I meant.” You seethed. “Let’s just drop it, okay? We’re not dating, that’s it.” He dictated. “Fine.” You replied. “Have a safe trip back home.” You left without another word, trying your best not to cry. Out of all the ways you thought he'd respond, this took you off guard. Hoseok wasn't one to push you away, but here he was doing so. “Fuck this,” you whimpered, walking up to Allie. “I’m going back to the hotel, sorry,” you said, turning away as soon as possible. “Y/N!”

You washed your face and hoped into the shower—the warm water soothing your sore muscles and emotions. You couldn’t tell if it was the water or your tears streaming down your face.

What else did you expect? Hoseok had a point: with his work, he couldn’t date someone. And it was ridiculous that Hoseok would want to date you.

However, instead of sulking over Hoseok, you decided to have a bath and put on a facemask.

The room’s phone rang while you were starting the bath.

“Hello?”

“Hello, is this Y/N Y/L/N?

“Speaking,” you confirmed.

“Great! There’s a man here, named,” a muffled noise, “Hoseok Jung.”

“Tell him I’m busy, please,” you replied.

Another muffled noise. “Hoseok says he's sorry and that he has ice cream—cookie dough. But if he’s dangerous, I can call the police.”

“No, no. God no,” you said.

You bit your lip. "You can send Hoseok up."

“Okay. However, if there’s anything wrong, please try to press the red button on the receiver. I will check back with you in an hour. If there’s no response, I’ll get someone to check on you.” They informed.

“Thank you,” you replied, slightly shocked by their concern.

You hung up.

A few minutes later, you heard a knock on the door. You tightened your robe.

You checked the peephole before cracking the door open.

“Hi,” you greeted.

“Hey," he smiled. "I'm sorry for leaving you like that at the party. It was sudden and insensitive. I should have been more considerate of your feelings rather than shutting you off.”

“I was just—scared. I don’t know what it’s going to be like for us. And I don't want you to fix me—but I like you, a lot—so I brought cookie dough ice cream and two spoons—"

“Do you want to come in?” You interrupted his nervous rambling.

“Yes, thank you,” he chuckled.

Hoseok still wore the suit from the fashion show, but his jacket was folded over his arm, and his dress shirt was unbuttoned lower.

“Oh, you’re running the bath,” he noticed. "We can deal with this later if it's a bad time."

“No, it’s alright. I’ll just turn off the water.” You replied, going to the bathroom to do so.

When you came back, Hoseok was sitting on the edge of your bed.

“So, what did you want to talk about?” You asked, sitting beside him.

He opened the ice cream tub, setting the lid on the desk and handing you one of the spoons.

“I was thinking you could talk more, actually; about how you feel," he replied, giving you the tub and angling himself to face you. "I just want to listen to you this time."

You gave a brief smile before spooning a small piece of ice cream into your mouth.

“Well, I just feel like we’re in this grey area of being really close but having sex. And we both like each other, and we said at the venue, and I just feel like we should just date then.” You set the ice cream and spoon down on the desk. “I get that work complicates things for you. But once we’ve confessed our feelings, I just don’t know what to call this—this friendship?”

Hoseok nodded.

"So, if you don't want to date, that's completely fine. I understand. However, we can't keep having sex like we used to; because I have feelings for you now, and you said you do too, so it's not a good mix."

“That’s fair,” he acknowledged.

“But what do you think? Like, how do you feel about us?” You asked.

He paused and set his spoon on the desk with yours. “I want to date you, Y/N. I just don’t want to get you hurt.” He softly grasped your hands. “The industry can be toxic, and I don’t want to subject you to that.”

“I understand,” you replied, “but I want to date you too, regardless of all the other bullshit. As cheesy as it sounds, all I want is you, Hoseok.”

Hoseok smiled but then pretended to gag.

“Hobi! I was romantic."

“Sorry, but that was so cheesy.” He cringed.

“So, do you want to just start dating, then?” You proposed. “We have the ice cream here; we can pretend to get to know each other more.”

He chuckled. “Sure. Let’s do that.”

Hoseok stood up and held his hand out to you. “Y/N Y/L, will you go on a date with me?”

You laughed but composed yourself. “I would love to, Jung Hoseok.” You took his hand, and he immediately sat back down.

“So, Y/N,” Hoseok began, handing you the partially melted ice cream and your spoon, “what do you like to do on the weekends?”

.

.

1 year later.

“I’m thinking of moving to Korea,” you said. Hoseok turned to you, surprised. “Really? But you’re not based here.” “I know,” you acknowledged, “but I can fly in and skype, or whatever. I can have a home base here, too.” You were visiting Hoseok for a couple weeks before you had to go back home for a clothing launch. Both of you were cuddling at his place when you brought up your idea of moving to Korea. “Of course, it wouldn’t be immediate. I would need to sort things out with Westley and Rachel and organize a place to stay here and a work area. The company is sturdy enough to handle the change.” You reasoned. “You could move in with me,” he suggested, turning his body to face you. “Are you sure?” “Yeah, why not. We’ve been dating for a while now, and it makes sense.” He shrugged. “Unless you don’t want to.” You kissed him. “No, I want to.” Both of you discussed what your move would be like and imagined living together. If you were to look back at how your relationship with Hoseok progressed, you would be shocked. In a matter of a few months, you and Hoseok went from friends to romantic partners. Although you had not come out publicly about your relationship, many people had a sense it existed; but that didn’t matter. You and Hoseok were in a secure and healthy relationship. It was long distanced, but you two made it work by visiting each other when you could and calling almost every day. The only thing that didn’t change was the sex—although it had gotten better. Nevertheless, so much has happened over the past year. And you wouldn’t have it any other way.

[kurtty-drabbles]

Postwoman au

N/A: Here we go. I´m tempted in making this a continuation of my Krampus au or my drabble, yet, I want to do something new here. Also, Santa here is professional but a freak in the sheet (THERE´S A NICHE WHERE SANTA FUCKS) also, would be racist if Santa attends to all holidays?

@dannybagpipesarecalling @djinmer4 @bamfoftheundead @muninandhugin

There´s an old saying, perhaps not as old as people made out to be, where it goes more or less like this- interpretations may vary and change a word or two- "love conquers all" and is the pure expression of the truth ever since Jean Grey and Scott Summers´s marriage change the course of history forever. Mutants are no longer seen as a threat and there´s no more social prejudice against mutants.

Is this heaven? Far from it. Mutants and Humans are the same sides of the coin- there´re mutants cable of doing more damage than a human can dream and of course, there´re humans that can respond to such violence with the same requiem - and Kitty Pryde is the one living this new reality among all the mutants of the second generation.

I saw the worse.

I saw the good.

And now I´m drifting meaninglessly.

Her body sludge down on the chair. Letting her foot touch the downy floor while the clock ticks and tack a loud sound- her eyes travel towards all the points in the waiting room. From the receptionist doing her work to the big closed door- and Kitty Pryde can see her reflection on the only mirror present. She was never one to put fashion above all, not even in such a situation. Wearing just a white shirt, short jeans and a yellow jacket wide open.

Then her land on the few magazines on display. Different magazines. Same story. Jean and Scott´s wedding was a fantastic story, but, sadly it has one unhappy ending. A man bursting into the church to confess his love for Jean Grey- Jubilee and Kitty was sure Logan would be the one to cause such scene- it was Prof X declaring his undying love for Jean Grey. It is still a nice gossip.

“When a father lusts over his son´s girlfriend” Kitty reads one of the main topics of the magazine. Repugnance is clear in her face and body language.

Another magazine has images of Prof X after his confession and even promised an exclusive interview with the man to explain himself. Kitty rolls her eyes at that- she reminisces when Bobby asks her to come to the wedding as his plus one. His boyfriend and he break up before the big day and Bobby didn´t want to go alone. And they only talk about Prof X and his revelation. The man was in love with a woman he raises since she was a kid- her cellphone rings softly. And has a message from her friends.

Good luck with your interview.

The receptionist has red hair. Too similar to her ex- Kitty meets Rachel Grey by accident. She was from a group called Excalibur. The relationship lasts a few months until Rachel and her group leave. Looking back. it was for the best-She recalls vividly an alternative version of herself who was looking at the relationship with confusion. And looking back again, Kitty can see why- and the woman is now looking at her. Was she always a red hair or is her succubus power kicking in? "Santa called...you can enter now, Miss Pryde" and the sultry smile is a tad similar to her ex. A tad bit only.

"Thanks" Kitty shurgs off and goes without looking back. If the succubus receptionist looks at Kitty going or not is her problem now.

_________________________________________________________________________________________

Kitty is Jewish. She has fond memories of her Hannukahs - uncle Tim bring a new dog he rescued from families who think dogs are toys or aunt Moira and her many good whiskeys- and yet, in all her past Hannukahs there was never a period where her family thought about Santa. Not for a single second. So, of course, Kitty is looking at the real Santa right now.

The popular version of Santa is a fat man with red clothes and a big beard- Yana jokes how Santa could be communist too-and yet, the reality is far from different. Tumblr has a word for this type of Santa, but, Kitty refuses to use it. So, Kitty can summarize by saying: yep, he´s handsome.

"Ah, you must be Miss Pryde, da" his accent is a mixture of Russian and English. Somewhat similar to Yana´s accent. Kitty nods. "Excellent, I´m sorry for the waiting. We´re dealing with a problem...all taken care" and gesture to Kitty sit as the other one will be here to interview her in a minute. "Galaticus usually don´t indicate anyone to this job"

"But he puts adds on the newspaper asking for Heralds" Kitty counters back and Santa didn´t deny that.

"He does that. He even accepts Deadpool as his Herald...don´t ask me why." he shakes his head at this information. "now, tell me about you, Miss Pryde...Galaticus only told us you´re good fitting for the job"

"A job as vague as possible" she arches an eyebrow. "And I´m unemployed at the moment." she pauses and adds. "I´m Jewish"

"If you think this will be a problem or that we only work with Christians families. You´re wrong. I work on any holiday that celebrates the family and love. Any family can receive me if they so wish, I have visited some Hannukahs in my past, I was denied in some Christian families and so and on. Krampus, my friend, is not a racist or believes in ''the old ways'' in fact, he hates the old ways more than you think" Santa states calmly and speaks something in a new language to something or someone way behind Kitty.

"There´s the devil!" Satan states all joyful causing Kitty to turn her head and see the so-called Krampus. A handsome indigo man. Golden eyes. and a tail throwing a winning smile at her. "Krampus, this is Kitty. Kitty this is Krampus. You´ll be his secretary...if he agrees" and the man kissed her hand-a bit old fashioned. Kitty didn´t hide her confusion- and both are now alone to conduct the interview.

____________________________________________________________________________________________

"Galaticus indicate you" his tone is joyful. Does he want Kitty to forget this is an interview? "Do you know what a Krampus is?" and Kitty closes her eyes hard and starts to mull the word for a moment.

I know I heard this name somewhere.

"Ok, I got it. You have no idea what am I" hos tone is amused and Kitty opens her eyes to see Kurt smiling like a cat. "Do you know what this job is?" and now she´s losing her patience.

"No, of course not, Galaticus comes into my room and says" Kitty pauses to mimic his voice. "Go to Santa. They have a job for you. And then he vanished. I had no idea what this job is about and no one is telling me anything. I don´t even celebrate Christmas" Kitty finishes her rants. Krampus is still too amused.

"My bad then, for starts, I deal with naughty mortals, so to speak" Kitty is listening. "Your job, if you accept, is to help me organize things. I´m terrible with names and numbers. And Santa´s elves can help me so far...of course, you´ll be compensated by your work. Here the initial idea for your salary" and Kitty is more than surprised. Is not a big number nor a smaller. It is acceptable for now. "and we´ll offer you some magic compensations to do some of the jobs. I mean, I´ll need someone to deliver messages to others deities and I know you don´t have teleportation" Krampus conclude waiting for her reply.

Kitty mulls over for 2 minutes. "Will I have to work all day and night?"

"Of course not. We all have lives. And the weekends are yours to do what you want!"

"If I give you my name..." and now Krampus chuckles.

"I´m not a regular fae. I can give you my name if it makes you feel at peace" and Kitty is surprised by this revelation. "my name is Kurt Wagner"

"I´m not sure if I´ll want to do this for a long period" Kitty begins and Kurt states that she needs to fill 6 months of work after that she´s free. "So, I´m willing to give a chance"

And with a snap of his fingers a pink fae- she calls herself pixie- shows up having in hands a contract in her hands ready for Kitty and Kurt to sign. Kitty read the contract - some laws are protecting her. As well as a law of discretion. Kitty can´t tell anyone what happens in Krampus´s working hour-and Kitty signal the contract.

"Welcome aboard, Katzchen. Hope you can survive the experience"

"Wait, what?"

[tcm]

Bette Davis and Dark Victory (’39) by Theresa Brown

I was working at my computer one Saturday night a while ago when a friend texted me:

“Prognosis Negative. 8:00pm.”

I stopped what I was doing, shut everything down, turned my TV to TCM and settled into DARK VICTORY (’39). I had a good time with a sad movie about a girl who dies.

The girl? She’s been an old maid, a spinster, a waitress, an alcoholic, a secretary, a tramp, a fashion editor, a murderer, a schoolteacher, a nanny, a mother, a daughter, a half-crazed sister. She’s all those and more. She is Margo Channing. She is fearless. She is The Queen. She is TCM’s Star of the Month: the incomparable Bette Davis. Loving classic films as we do might put us in a niche audience, but anyone over 30 who has ever seen a motion picture at least knows the name Bette Davis. She’s undoubtedly the most famous female in classic films that the general population of today knows. Now if you haven’t seen this film, be forewarned, this review contains SPOILERS. If you do know it, there’ll be no surprises. Come. Walk with me through this movie.

Bette Davis plays socialite Judith Traherne, who goes through denial, grief and then acceptance of the fact she is dying. The movie shows each phase of her experience not in a jagged, disjointed, paint-by-number way, but seamlessly flowing from one situation to the next. We all have to face the inevitable. Me, I refuse to go. Nope, I ain’t goin'! But if I must, this movie might help get me through it. Max Steiner waves his baton over the music score. And director Edmund Goulding keeps it all together...even if by the end, we’re a sobbing mess.

WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME? ~

To start. Judith’s hand-eye coordination has gotten so bad that she’s forced to see a doctor. She puts up a false bravado at Dr. Steele’s office. She rants and rails, but the Doctor (played by dependable George Brent) stays steady, focused and not scared off by this human tornado. He sees through all that and calls her out. The camera frames Davis in profile as she slowly bows her head in acknowledgement of each symptom. She’s broken. She can no longer deny it. Judith finally admits to needing help. Goulding shoots this scene well. Judith is vulnerable and Dr. Steele, commanding.

A FRIEND IN NEED IS A FRIEND INDEED ~

Hollywood newcomer Geraldine Fitzgerald plays Ann, Judith’s best friend/business manager. (You can hear the hint of the brogue still in her. Fitzgerald’s previous film was WUTHERING HEIGHTS, ‘39). Ann has the tough job; she watches over Judith. She is the Keeper of Secrets. Her eyes don’t leave the doctor for a moment when he tries to examine Judith. She...watches...him. Later, when Ann finds out Judith is not going to make it, Fitzgerald plays the scene in a way that amazed me: her gasp, the air sucked out of her, the tremor in her hands are all subtly done. I’ve replayed that moment a couple of times because Fitzgerald seemed true, genuine and pitch perfect in that moment. Ann had to go through all the emotions Judith will be going through, but she had to go through them all now...this instant. The genius of the film is rather Hitchcockian: we, the audience, are given more information than Judith. And now we are made to watch over Judith too. We hold our collective breath.

I also like how there is just the faintest whiff of jealous rivalry when Judith thinks Ann wants the doctor for herself. On a (very) personal note, what makes me chuckle is watching how the studio tries to tamp down Geraldine Fitzgerald’s looks. What a beautiful girl she was with that deep red hair; I swear you could see it through the black-and-white. I chuckle when I see how they have Fitzgerald in "sensible" shoes or a frock with long sleeves—buttoned up to her collar and down to her hem as if she were a monk—while Bette is in frilly femme-y girly clothes. Fitzgerald’s beauty shines through even if Bette is the Star. Fitzgerald is a good supporting actress. She supports Davis marvelously throughout this entire movie.

PROGNOSIS NEGATIVE ~

To be honest, this is the moment we wait for. It’s a great set-piece. Steiner sets us up on tenterhooks with his music of discovery and realization. Judith sees her file on the doctor’s desk and questions nurse Wainwright (one of my favorite character actresses...Dorothy Peterson) about it. She finds out the truth about her condition. And again, we’re given information some of the film’s characters don't have. Judith knows. And she’s gunning for Ann and the good doctor.

I'M GOING ON A BENDER...JUST TRY AND STOP ME ~

That scene in the restaurant is classic; Judith is a cat toying with two messes before she strikes the fatal blow. Ann and the doctor have no clue WHAT she’s talking about. (Huh? Wha'? Nice try.) Judith feels betrayed, tears 'em both a new one, storms into the night to drink and party and run...run...run away from all this.

The point/counterpoint of the scene, with Judith and her frivolous ritzy crowd with not a serious thought in their rich pointy heads, is good. "Oh give me time," the song goes. Davis uses those great ‘Bette Davis-eyes’ to good effect here. She can’t run. She can’t hide. She knows she is dying. Her eyes go dead. She cares about nothing.

PLEASE, MAKE ME FORGET ~

I’ve heard bones of contention made because Humphrey Bogart plays an Irishman in this, brogue and all. Is he convincing? I dunno. He and Davis appeared in a few Warner Bros. films by the time this film rolled around. (If you get a chance, watch MARKED WOMAN, ‘37.) Michael, the Bogart Irish horse trainer, makes his move on Judith. He’s always liked her, respected her. He’s not afraid of her like those other vanilla milk sops who buzz around her. She encourages his advances, but she comes to realize making out with the lower-class stable hand will not change things or stave off the inevitable. But it was an option she was willing to try. You’ll be the judge if they had chemistry or not or if Bogie is a convincing Irishman.

I’M HAPPY AND CONTENT ~

I love the scenes in Vermont with Judith and her doctor. The betrayal and recriminations are all in the past. They’re married. Judith stops running and lets love wash over her. Here’s another side to Bette. She’s all friendly and warm and giving. She’s sweet and young. She and Brent made several movies together and definitely have good chemistry. As the doctor who falls in love with his patient, he’s totally committed to her. He’s making her happy. And I’m happy Judith is happy. She’s a new woman.

KIBBITZING WITH OLD FRIENDS ~

This is a nice scene of old friends getting together. It’s Judith, Ann and Michael - the horse trainer. I liked Bogie better in THIS scene. Doesn’t he look good with the fedora and trench coat? (He’s going to wear more of this in the coming decade...and with Lauren Bacall waiting in the wings in the mid-40’s). Judith’s got her best buddy up in Vermont for a visit. She’s surrounded by people who care for her. This is a nice moment shot outside.

...BE MY FRIEND ~

What we’re told would happen, is now happening. And both women know it. It’s time. Ann takes it baaadly. Judith still has "noble" work to do to get everyone squared away. Ann holds one more secret and is made to promise not to tell the doctor. GULP! It’s a sad touching scene in the garden...their last together. When Judith sends her away telling Ann she must do this alone, it’s really tough. Nothing maudlin or mawkish. There’s a strength in it. I’m sad watching Ann run down the road, passing laughing children, running to deal with her grief alone. Losing her friend.

I LOVE YOU ~

Here is the moment where Judith totally thinks of others. Steiner doesn’t lay it on thick with harps and violins. His score is understated as it accompanies Judith’s goodbye to her husband. She’s sending him off to a medical conference in New York. She won’t be here when he returns. She puts on that false bravado once again, but this time it’s for him; to give him strength in his future without her. This a very touching scene. When he picks her off the stair-step, has her in his arms and they look out the window together, we know she’s almost totally blind.

Once again, we know more than the character in the movie. For me, this saying goodbye is reminiscent of BRIEF ENCOUNTER (‘45) or THE FALLEN IDOL (’48) where your last goodbye is spoiled by something outside yourselves.

DARK VICTORY is one of the triumphs of Bette Davis’ legendary career. We see different sides of her throughout the film. Yes, we all must face our end alone. We can only hope to leave those left behind in a better place. Stay tuned for Bette Davis every Tuesday this November on TCM. She does a fantastic job showing us her journey.

[hopesilverheart]

Title: I loved your colours (before I loved you) Artist: @calliartss​ Rating: Explicit (Chapter 10 only) Pairings: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Alec Lightwood & Clary Fray, Clary Fray/Isabelle Lightwood Word Count: ~95k Summary: Magnus Bane is a journalist who's always dreamed of modelling for Lightwood Fashions. When the CEO Alec Lightwood starts looking for new models for their spring collection, he jumps on the occasion.

In the meantime, Alec Lightwood is struggling with the idea of finally announcing his role as co-designer. When Magnus Bane strolls into his life, Alec is torn between keeping his secret or throwing all caution to the wind.

This fic was created for the Malec Discord Mini Bang 2020.

Chapter 9: To be your muse

“Mister Bane!”

Magnus froze, as his mind registered the voice calling out for him. He had only heard Maryse Lightwood speak a few times from afar, but it had been enough for him to know he should be at least somewhat terrified of the woman. Doubly so considering the fact that he was actively lying to her and working as her Head Editor. If one person could ruin things for Magnus, it was Maryse Lightwood.

“Mrs. Lightwood,” he said, a smile plastered onto his face, as he turned around to face the imposing woman. Maryse never looked anything less than perfect, and Magnus had to admit he found it both impressive and incredibly intimidating. “Did you need me for something?”

“I did,” the woman smiled, the gesture managing to come off as both warm and surprisingly dangerous. “I know you’re a very busy man in between your job here and your position on the modelling team, but I believe we have a few things to discuss about your future within the company.”

The mere mention of his future had Magnus tensing up unconsciously. Ever since he had joined the Lightwood Enterprises, he had tried his best to forget about the circumstance under which he had been hired, as well as the lies he had to tell along the way. He had tried to act as though everything was alright, and even Isabelle tended to forget that he wasn’t technically her boss yet. It was a strange dynamic, and Magnus knew it could all come crumbling down at a moment’s notice.

Needless to say, the last thing he wanted to do with his afternoon was have a strenuous conversation with Maryse Lightwood about his future. Unfortunately, he didn’t exactly have a choice.

“Of course,” he said pleasantly, hiding his trembling hands behind his back and hoping the woman didn’t pick up on his anxiety. “Did you want to do this in my office, or should we go up to-”

“My office is far more comfortable,” Maryse cut him off, pressing the button for the building’s top floor, staying silent as the elevator slowly took them far away from Magnus’ safe space.

He had purposefully been avoiding the top floor, not wanting to come across Maryse or bother Alec whilst he was hard at work on the business side of things. In hindsight, perhaps he should have at least gotten himself acquainted with the higher-ups’ living quarters, since it would have made this entire experience at least a tiny bit less nerve-wracking.

By the time they reached Maryse’s office, Magnus was sweating profusely and finding it hard to breathe. He had tried to catch a glimpse of Alec as they walked past the floor’s numerous offices, but he didn’t even know where his boyfriend worked. Yeah, he really needed to visit Alec’s office as soon as possible.

If he still had a job by the end of the day, of course.

“There’s no need to look so nervous, Magnus,” Maryse chuckled, looking at him amusedly. “Can I call you Magnus? I usually try to avoid using first names with my highly-ranked employees, but we both know you’re not just a random employee. Isabelle speaks very highly of you.”

“Ah, yes,” Magnus cleared his throat, calming down slightly as he took a seat across from Maryse and took in her relaxed stature. She didn’t look like a woman about to fire her temporary Head Editor, which meant there was a chance Magnus wasn’t on the verge of getting sacked for lying about his past. “Isabelle is a wonderful friend, and I couldn’t be more thankful to have her on my side. She’s quite talented too. I have to admit I’m curious as to why she didn’t get the Head Editor position.”

“She’s just not cut out for it,” Maryse answered easily. “I love my daughter, and I’m sure she’ll make a wonderful CEO when it’s time for me to step down, but she’s happy where she is right now. The last thing she needs is an extra set of responsibilities. You, on the other hand, seem to be handling everything superbly.”

Magnus blushed lightly at the praise. He had certainly been trying his best to keep the media team under control and deliver the best issues Lightwood Media had ever seen. He hoped Lorenzo was seething on the other side of town.

“Isabelle isn’t the only one who admires your work ethic,” Maryse continued, raising her eyebrows at Magnus and letting her lips curl into a small smirk. “My son seems to think you’re the best thing to ever happen to this company. I have reason to believe he may be a little bit biased, but his assessment is not entirely wrong. My company is doing better than ever thanks to you, Magnus and I’m not too prideful to admit it.”

“Thank you,” Magnus said sincerely. He may have originally taken the Head Editor position as a way of getting back at Lorenzo, but he truly did love his new job. He loved how much freedom it gave him, how much control he had over the final drafts, how much easier it was to work mainly for himself rather than someone else… His experience as a model was delightful but becoming Head Editor had reminded him of why he loved journalism so much in the first place.

“I’m sure it’ll come as no surprise to you that we wish to hire you full time,” Maryse continued, chuckling when Magnus’ jaw dropped down momentarily before he managed to school his features into something a little more dignified. “Our previous Head Editor left behind more messes than he was worth, and you’ve already managed to clean them all up. You’re dedicated, punctual, and a fantastic writer. We would be lucky to keep you, if that’s still something you’d be interested in.”

“If that’s- Yes! Yes, absolutely!” Magnus exclaimed. “This job means the world to me, and I would be honoured to work here permanently. Obviously, the next month or so is going to be a little tight in terms of scheduling, since I also have to handle the modelling side of things, but I’ll be completely focused on the editing side of things as soon as the spring collection has been released.”

“Yes, I assumed you would say something like that,” Maryse smiled wryly. “Isabelle has worked under me for far longer than you have, Magnus, and I know how hectic things can get the month before the release. Rest assured that the rest of the team will help as best as they can whilst you deal with the fashion team.”

“Thank you,” Magnus said emphatically, letting out a breath he hadn’t been aware he’d been holding. “The workload is much higher than I anticipated, and I know it’s going to get a lot worse before it gets better.”

“Ah, yes, Alec has always been a harsh taskmaster,” Maryse chuckled. “He has a great team, but they tend to work themselves into the ground more often than not because of his expectations.”

“Well they’re- they’re mostly Clarissa’s expectations, actually,” Magnus frowned. Alec may have been the company’s CEO, but he didn’t have nearly as much say in fashion matters as Clary did, given that the collection was her handiwork. “But yes, they definitely make us work a lot. Not that I’m complaining, since I actually love working with the other models.”

When he looked back up at Maryse after his impromptu speech, he found her staring at him strangely, as though she couldn’t quite understand what he had been saying. He hadn’t thought he’d been particularly unclear, but he also wasn’t in her spot, so…

“I’m sorry, did I say something wrong?” He gulped. He hadn’t meant to make it sound like Clary was a tough boss; he loved the woman, he really did. God, had he ruined his chances by accidentally criticising someone whom Maryse probably saw as family? “Clarissa is great, really. She’s an amazing person, a wonderful friend, and her designs are pure genius…”

“You didn’t say anything wrong, Magnus,” Maryse assured him, waving his concerns away. “I just… You only mentioned Clary. I assumed Alec would have told you about her secret partner by now, since the two of you are so… close.”

“He would never betray her partner like that,” Magnus sighed, thinking about the very few times he had tried to get an answer out of his boyfriend. Every time he mentioned it, Alec clammed up and told him he would find out when the time was right, so Magnus had eventually given up. “He seems to think it should be up to them to reveal themselves, and… Well, I suppose that makes sense. Besides, Alec would never give someone’s secrets up just because the two of us are dating.”

“So you are dating!” Maryse beamed, her eyes lighting up excitedly. “I didn’t want to assume, and he so rarely talks to me these days, but I thought the two of you looked rather close. Oh, I’m so happy for you both!”

“Thank… you?” Magnus said slowly, wondering what kind of alternate dimension he had stepped into. Maryse Lightwood was infamous for her impassive features and her inability to show affection even to her children, and this was… This was more than a little disconcerting. “I’m very happy for us too. I’m sorry, maybe I shouldn’t have said anything. What if Alec wanted to tell you himself?”

“Alec would have never said anything,” Maryse scoffed, unintentionally making Magnus’ heart clench painfully. Some of his hurt must have shown on his face, because she immediately shook her head and smiled at him reassuringly. “Not because he doesn’t care about you or is embarrassed by you or any of that nonsense. Alec just doesn’t really talk to me like he used to. He’s a busy man and he has plenty of people to talk to, so I usually only find out about his boyfriends when he decides to bring them along to a family event.”

Magnus bit down on his lip to stop himself from asking about Alec’s past relationships. They hadn’t been deliberately avoiding the topic, but it had never come up and Magnus was starting to get curious. Almost everything pointed at Alec having very little romantic experience, and yet Maryse spoke as though he had been in at least a few relationships.

However, that was something he needed to discuss with Alec himself, not his mom. His mom, who also happened to be Magnus’ boss. On the list of people Magnus should be talking to about his relationship with Alec, he was almost certain that Maryse was at the very bottom. The very, very bottom.

“I’m just happy he has someone like you in his life,” Maryse continued softly. “My son is a wonderful man but has a tendency to cut himself off from the rest of the world and close himself to other people. It’s nice to see that he can let himself go from time to time. Tell me, how long have the two of you been together?”

“A few weeks?” Magnus replied, a hint of uncertainty in his tone. Truth be told, he hadn’t really taken the date into account when he had asked Alec out. They had both been busy with work and the collection, and Magnus had barely known what day of the week it was, let alone what day of the month they had first gone out on. However, he was almost certain they were coming up on a month of dating. Something along those lines. “We’ve only been on a few dates because of work, but I believe it’s been at least three weeks.”

“Very nice,” Maryse grinned, clapping her hands together loudly. “Then it’s definitely not too early for me to invite you to our monthly family dinner. The children and I try to meet up once in a while, and our March invitation is coming up in a week and a half, so you should join us.”

“Oh, I- I wouldn’t want to impose,” Magnus chuckled nervously. He had never been good at family dinners, and he doubted the Lightwood ones were any nicer than the ones he’d been to in the past. “I know Alec and Isabelle are always busy, and I assume their brothers are the same way, so I wouldn’t want to take away what little time you have with them.”

And he really, really didn’t want to deal with all the Lightwoods at once. Alec was wonderful, of course, and Magnus would never turn down an opportunity to spend time with him, but the others? Isabelle was intense on a good day, and if she was there Clary would probably be too, which meant too much girl talk for Magnus to handle. As for the other two Lightwood siblings; Max was apparently still young enough to be in high school, and Magnus had never been great with teenagers, and Jace – who worked at the coffee shop down the street – seemed to be constantly suspicious around him.

All in all, definitely not a good plan. Especially not if Maryse was going to be there, reigning over them like a terrifying matriarch and interrogating Magnus and Clary about their intentions towards her children. Not even Simon’s likely presence – considering his relationship with Jace – was enough to make Magnus want to attend such a horrendous event.

“Oh please, it’s really not a problem,” Maryse smiled. “I’m sure Alec would be more than happy to have you there, and I hear that you’re quite friendly with both Clary and Simon, so I’m sure you’ll fit in just fine.”

“Right, yes, that sounds amazing,” Magnus lied through his teeth, hoping he didn’t look half as uncomfortable as he felt. “I’ll talk to Alexander and he’ll keep you updated on whether or not I can make it. With all this added workload and the photoshoots coming up, I’m going to be pretty busy, but I’ll try to fit the dinner into my schedule!”

“Perfect,” Maryse grinned, her teeth glinting almost ominously, as though she were daring Magnus to bail on the dinner. “I know you have an important photo shoot with Vogue coming up, but I made sure to plan everything after that, and the March issue should be ready by then, right?”

“Absolutely,” Magnus grit out. Of course the woman had planned everything to work with all of their schedules. Usually, he would have been impressed, but given how little he wanted to attend the Lightwood family dinner, he was going to stew in his frustration for a while longer. “Anything to make Alexander happy.”

“Of course,” Maryse nodded, her smile gentling minutely. “I really am happy for the two of you. I may not know you very well, but if Isabelle thinks you’re good enough for her brother, then I don’t doubt that you are.”

“I don’t think anyone is good enough for Alexander,” Magnus sighed. “But I’m trying my best.”

And he was. He knew he had done some dubious things in his life, knew he was lying to Alec by omission every time they talked about his job, knew he wasn’t the best at juggling his job and his relationship, but he was trying. He wanted to make Alexander happy, and if that meant putting in a little extra work and living on coffee and three hours of sleep after a date, then so be it.

“I’m sure you are,” Maryse hummed. “I’ll have your final contract drafted and on your desk in two weeks maximum. I need to go over the specifics with the board and talk with a few people about your placement, but I doubt anyone will complain about having someone so competent on the team.”

“Sounds good to me,” Magnus smiled, feeling a lot less unsettled now that they were talking about his job again, and not his relationship with Alec. “Thank you for giving me a chance in the first place, Mrs. Lightwood. I know you probably had plenty of candidates, so thank you for listening to your daughter and letting me prove my worth to you.”

“My ex-husband passed up on your talent once already, Magnus,” Maryse said softly. “I wasn’t about to make the same mistake. There’s something to be said about people who get turned down from their dream job but come back even stronger. Robert rejected you, and yet you still came back to Lightwood Fashions. Isabelle’s recommendation is what put you on my radar, but you got this job all by yourself, Magnus.”

“Really?” Magnus gaped. He should have known the woman wouldn’t hire just anyone as her Head Editor, but if she knew he had applied for Lightwood Fashions once before, there was a good chance she knew other things about his past, like how…

“Your work for Fade Media was admirable,” Maryse said, sounding genuinely impressed. “Lorenzo Rey isn’t an easy man to work for, and I have it under good authority that you should have been promoted years ago. Your track record is impeccable, and you truly are a valuable asset to our team. My children may like you a lot, Magnus, but that alone wouldn’t have been enough to get you a job here.”

“Of course,” Magnus nodded. “I shouldn’t have implied-”

“It’s fine,” Maryse cut him off. “I’m sure Isabelle made it out to be a lot more dramatic than it actually was. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have work to get back to. And you probably do too.”

“Yeah- Yes, I- Oh, shit. Yes, I do. I was supposed to be somewhere ten minutes ago, and I really need to get going,” Magnus clambered out of his seat, taking the time to shake Maryse’s hand before bolting out of the room.

Even as he rushed towards the fashion team’s floor, Magnus couldn’t help but go over everything that had just happened. He had Alexander’s mother’s blessing for their relationship, had been invited to a family dinner, and had officially gotten his dream job. It sounded too good to be true.

Everything was coming together perfectly, and yet he felt like the other shoe was ready to drop at any given moment.

***

“I ran into your mother today.”

Alec’s head snapped towards him as Magnus spoke, absent-mindedly twirling his pasta around in his plate and decidedly not meeting his boyfriend’s gaze. He had been trying to bring the topic up ever since they had gotten to the restaurant, but a part of him had been reluctant to break the peaceful and romantic atmosphere that had settled over them when Alexander had kissed him hello.

“You did?” Alec asked, his eyebrows furrowing adorably. “What did she want? Please tell me she didn’t hound you with questions about our relationship or some other nonsense like that. I swear she means well, but she tends to overstep. I’m still half convinced that she lives to embarrass us.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s what most parents do, darling,” Magnus chuckled. “But your mother was perfectly polite. She wanted to talk to me about work, and then she may or may not have mentioned you and our relationship and maybe even a certain family dinner?”

“I was going to invite you there myself,” Alec grumbled, his cheeks flushing a light pink.

“You want me to come?” Magnus whisper-shouted, burying his head in his hands. “Alexander, I was counting on you to tell me you didn’t want me there so I had an excuse not to go!”

“You don’t want to go?” Alec frowned, looking at Magnus as though he had just crushed his heart. “I thought you liked Isabelle, and I’m almost certain you’ll get along with Max, and Jace isn’t half as bad once you get to know him. Besides, Clary and Simon could always use some support on the non-Lightwood side of the table.”

“There are sides to the table?” Magnus blanched. “That is exactly why I don’t want to go to dinner. Look, Alec, I care about you. I care about you a lot, in fact, but I am terrible with families. Parents usually think I’m too much or not enough for their children, siblings always feel a little intimidated or like they have to threaten me, and I don’t see why we can’t just stick to our one-on-one dates.”

Alec raised his eyebrows at Magnus, looking completely unimpressed, and the journalist immediately deflated.

“I just don’t want to mess things up between us,” he sighed. “We’ve got a great thing going on, and I feel like meeting your family is just going to make everything complicated. What if they don’t like me?”

“Well, I’m pretty sure Izzy definitely likes you,” Alec answered, smirking at Magnus when the older man rolled his eyes. “And my mother wouldn’t have invited you if she didn’t think you were worthy of me or whatever else it is that helps her decide whether someone is allowed to attend family gatherings or not. As for everyone else… Who cares what they have to say? You have my mother’s, sister’s, and best friend’s approval. What more do you need?”

“Your approval?” Magnus suggested, grinning when Alec huffed exasperatedly. “I mean, you are the one I’m trying to impress, after all.”

“Magnus, of course you have my approval, you idiot,” Alec shook his head fondly. “I’m the one who’s dating you, remember? I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be doing that if I didn’t like you at least a little bit. And if it makes you feel any better, I care about you a lot too.”

“It does make me feel better, actually,” Magnus preened.

He and Alec hadn’t exactly been shy when it came to their feelings, but they hadn’t talked about them in depth either. They had been dating for a month, but Magnus could count the number of times they had had a deep conversation on one hand. He didn’t mind that they were taking it slowly; he just wished he felt a little more secure in his relationship.

“But do you… Do you really want me there?” He asked quietly, feeling shier than he had in a very long time. “Or do you just feel obligated to ask me now that you know your mother talked to me about it?”

“Magnus,” Alec sighed, putting his hand down on the table, palm up, just waiting for Magnus to cover it with his own before speaking again. “Of course I want you to be there. Look, I know I haven’t talked to you about my family much. I also know we spend most of our time at the office, at your apartment, or out on dates, but you really do mean a lot to me. You’ve introduced me to your family, so it’s only fair of me to do the same in return.”

“You haven’t met all of my family,” Magnus pointed out, regretting his words as soon as a mischievous glint entered Alec’s eyes. “No. Whatever idea you just came up with, I’m going to have to pass. Nothing good ever comes from looks like that, Alexander. And I would know, since I see it in the mirror far too often for comfort.”

“At least hear me out before you turn it down,” Alec pouted. Magnus relented immediately – what could he say, he was weak for his boyfriend’s lips. “You’re nervous about meeting my family, right? So how about we make things easier by inviting your family too? I could ask Simon and Clary to bring their siblings and parents too, and we could make a whole thing out of it. My mom would be more than happy to have a few extra people over.”

Magnus opened his mouth to tell Alec it was a terrible idea, but he snapped it shut after a second’s deliberation.

On one hand, he wasn’t sure it was the best idea to bring a huge group of very different people together, especially when at least half the people involved were dating each other. On the other hand… Having more people around would mean less interactions between Magnus and the Lightwoods, which was exactly what he wanted.

Besides, he had always been planning on asking Catarina and Ragnor to spend an evening with Alexander and him at some point in the near future. By inviting everyone to the same event, they would be killing two birds with one stone, and giving Magnus a few more people to talk to without having to engage with Maryse and Jace Lightwood.

“It’s… Not a terrible idea,” he conceded, ignoring Alec’s little victorious cry – which wasn’t cute at all, it wasn’t. “Is your mother’s house big enough to have everyone over? Because my family means Catarina, Raphael, Ragnor, and Madzie. And if Clary is bringing her parents, that’s an extra two people, plus Simon’s, and whatever siblings they have…”

“It’ll be fine,” Alec assured him, squeezing his fingers gently before letting them go and focusing on his food again. “Anything to make you feel a little more comfortable.”

“That’s very sweet of you, darling,” Magnus smiled, going back to his pasta and wondering – not for the first time – what he had done to deserve someone like Alexander Lightwood in his life. “You know, my conversation with your mother made me think about something else that’s been on my mind for a little while. You never brought up the topic, so I wasn’t sure if it was something you were okay with talking about or not, but… Have you ever been in a serious relationship before this?”

Alec’s gaze shifted uncomfortably at the question, but Magnus noticed he also didn’t completely close off, so Magnus didn’t think he had screwed up too badly. It had been a while since had been in a relationship himself, but he was almost certain talking about past experiences was usually okay. Usually.

“Two or three,” Alec answered vaguely. “None of them worked out, and the last one wasn’t great, so I hadn’t seriously dated anyone in around two years when I met you. Is that… Is that a problem? Is it obvious?”

“It’s not a problem,” Magnus reassured him immediately. “Not at all. And it’s not completely obvious either, it’s just… Most people would have tried to hurry things along a lot faster than you did, so I assumed you just didn’t have a lot of experience. Not that I’m any better, since I was just as slow as you were.”

“So has it been a while for you too?” Alec inquired, seemingly caught somewhere between relief and confusion. “I mean, I thought- You’re just very- I can’t imagine why someone like you wouldn’t have someone in their life. Not because I think you sleep around or need someone to survive, you’re just--. You’re beautiful and kind and the closest thing to perfect I’ve ever met, so I thought you had to have had a lot more experience than me.”

“Not when it comes to relationships,” Magnus shrugged. “I’ve dated before, but I mostly stuck to one-night-stands after my long-time girlfriend broke my heart and thoroughly screwed me over. So don’t worry about your lack of experience, because I guarantee you that I’m just as nervous about messing this up as you are.”

“Oh,” Alec said softly. “That’s- I mean, it’s not good that you had a bad experience, but I’m glad that I’m not the only stressed one in this relationship. Clary kept telling me that all I had to do was talk to you, but I just wasn’t sure, especially since her relationship with Izzy is hardly the most stable one in the world. No offence to them, of course.”

“Oh no, I completely agree,” Magnus chuckled. “The double date was nice, but we’re definitely not doing that again for a while, no matter how much you and Clary want to plan something. I care about both of them, and I know you do too, but they’re very different together than they are apart.”

“They bring out the worst and the best in each other,” Alec smiled crookedly. “It’s both a blessing and a curse. Sometimes, I wonder if Clary was right and they truly are too different for each other. But, then I see how in love they are, even after years of petty arguments and low-level hatred, and I remember why they’re so perfect for each other.”

“I think everyone got that from the fact that Clary designs her clothes with Isabelle in mind,” Magnus laughed softly.

A strange look, one that was slowly but surely becoming familiar to Magnus, crossed Alec’s face as he spoke. Every once in a while, Magnus would say something about Clary or the fashion team or the secret designer or the collection, and that same look would appear on Alec’s face, almost like clockwork. The journalist wasn’t sure what it was about yet, wasn’t even sure whether it was a good thing or a bad thing, but he couldn’t help but feel like he was simply missing a piece of the bigger puzzle.

“She’s her muse,” his boyfriend eventually said, voice sounding hoarse and loaded with emotion. “It’s not uncommon for artists to have someone they think about when they’re trying to create art. Most of the time, Clary has enough imagination to last her a lifetime, but when she’s feeling down or uninspired, Izzy is the thing that keeps her going.”

“It’s romantic as hell,” Magnus hummed. “Clary may not think she’s doing much by dedicating collection upon collection to Isabelle, but that’s one sure way to make sure you stay with your soulmate forever. I know for a fact that I wouldn’t be able to stay away from someone who designed an entire line of clothes for me.”

“You wouldn’t?” Alec asked, once again shooting Magnus that slightly uncertain, worried, and fond look. “So if someone were to design a collection for you, you would leave me and run into their arms?”

Alexander was smiling as he spoke, so Magnus knew he wasn’t being serious, but he also thought he should make one thing very clear, no matter what he had been joking about earlier.

“No, of course not,” he told Alec sincerely. “I just meant… Look, if someone designed clothes for me right now, it would be a little creepy and slightly obsessive. But if you were to design clothes for me – I know, I know, not going to happen anytime soon – how could I possibly leave you? It’s kind of like… If I wrote a book and dedicated it to you. How would that make you feel?”

“Very much in love,” Alec answered bluntly, flushing at his choice of words but resolutely not taking them back. “It would be physical proof that I have someone out there who loves me enough to give me a piece of their art or their life.”

“Exactly,” Magnus nodded. “Which is why I think there’s a good chance Isabelle and Clary are going to end up married, someday. I just hope I’ll still be around to see the wedding, and maybe even help with the colour schemes if Clary’s secret partner is too busy doing something else.”

“I’m sure he won’t be too busy,” Alec snorted, and then clapped his hand over his mouth, his eyes widening comically. Magnus frowned, going over his words, wondering what about his statement had been so-

“It’s a man!” He cried out, quieting down when the couple sitting at the table next to theirs shot them a reprimanding glance. “It’s a man! I knew you would slip up someday! And I promise I’m not going to say anything to anyone, alright, but I knew it! I knew it had to be a man.”

“Why? Because a woman couldn’t come up with those outfits?” Alec raised his eyebrows judgmentally, although Magnus could tell he was mostly just amused and slightly exasperated by Magnus’ antics. “Don’t let Clary hear you say that, or she’ll insist on designing the next collection by herself, and then her partner will be out of a job. You wouldn’t want to be the one to cost her partner his job, right?”

“As if she could ever let him go,” Magnus scoffed. “The man’s a genius, and I will never change my mind about that. Clary may be a wonderful artist, and her designs may be beautiful, but nothing could beat that man’s talent with colours. You could learn a few things from him, you know? Maybe you should have a talk with him before the fashion show, just so you don’t end up wearing an outfit that doesn’t actually match.”

“Sure,” Alec choked out, looking like he was trying very hard not to laugh at Magnus. “Sure, yeah, I’ll have a chat with him sometime in the near future. I’m sure he’ll have some wonderful advice for me. But should I be worried for us? I know you said you wouldn’t leave me for just any designer, but what if your colour genius designed something for you? Are you telling me you would be able to resist him?”

He hesitated for a second. A second. And yet, Alec still managed to catch his slight moment of doubt.

“Ha! I knew it!” He grinned widely. “I knew you had a professional crush on him. Tell you what, as soon as he reveals himself, I’ll make sure you get a one-on-one session with him. Maybe an interview? I’m sure everyone will have plenty of questions when he finally decides to tell the world about his true identity.”

“I- You- I mean, I’m not going to say no to that,” Magnus pouted. “But let it be known that I don’t intend on cheating on you, even if the man designs me an entire collection. No one is as impressive as you are, Alexander, not even the genius who created my peacock outfit, and that white ensemble I’ve only seen in pictures so far, and that dress Isabelle was wearing the other day.”

“I can’t believe it,” Alec laughed brightly. “Clary is going to have a field trip when I tell her about this.”

“Oh god, you’re never going to let this go, are you?” Magnus groaned. “I should have kept my mouth shut. Although, in my defence, it’s like the man is tempting me! The spring collection is basically made for me, in the less sentimental sense than what Clary does for Isabelle. Has… Has the secret partner met me?”

“I’m not giving you any more clues, Magnus,” Alec rolled his eyes. “But he knows what you look like, and he would be an idiot not to take advantage of such a beautiful model. I can’t even blame him for wooing you through clothes, because I would do the exact same thing in his place. You’re a vision, Magnus, and I would be proud to call you my muse.”

Sometimes, Magnus forgot that Alec could be smooth when he got out of his mind. He forgot that behind the blushes and the stammering and the constant worry, there was a confident man who knew what he wanted and wasn’t afraid of taking it. Magnus knew he was getting closer and closer to completely tearing down Alexander’s defences, and it never ceased to send a thrill of pleasure down his spine.

“I would love nothing more than to be your muse,” he murmured, looking up at Alec from underneath his lashes and smirking smugly when his boyfriend’s eyes darkened with desire. “But you know, I’m sure I could inspire you to do a great many things other than art.”

“Oh, I’m sure you could,” Alec breathed out. “Do you want to get out of here? My apartment is only ten minutes away.”

Magnus was out of his seat and slamming a handful of bills on the table before Alec could even finish speaking. His boyfriend stared at him wide-eyed for a few moments, but he was standing and dragging Magnus out of the restaurant less than five seconds later, giggling and smiling and looking like he had just been handed the stars and the moon.

Alexander Lightwood was beautiful, and he was his, and if Magnus had been even just a little bit more of a romantic, he might have believed he was already in love with him.

[backdeck-potato-novelist]

I Get The Feeling That I’m Right Where I Belong

Chapter 3: My Life’s Become As Vapid

AO3

Beginning, Previous, Next

Adrien and Luka kissed each other goodbye on the cheek. Luka put his helmet on and slowly started up his motorcycle. Juleka grabbed his waist and leaned into him as they took off down the street. Adrien waved after them, before turning back to school. He had fencing today. While it meant he wouldn’t get home until almost five, it also meant that he had the next forty five minutes with nothing to do. Kagami had talked Chloe in to staying until practice started, so he was considering crashing their date.

He reentered the front of the building and groaned. Lila Rossi was standing in the middle of the courtyard, surrounded by her adoring drones. Adrien didn’t know most of them, but he recognized a few from their class. They all knew who he was, though, and so the moment he made eye contact with Lila, they had practically swarmed him.

“Oh my gosh, Adrien. How are you?”

“I’m good, Lila. And you?” He was very proud of how level he had kept his voice.

“Oh, I’m just fantastic! My boyfriend just texted to let me know that I can stay with him for the summer!” There was so much cruel hope in her eyes. Adrien didn’t want to ask the expected question of her, but he also knew that if he didn’t follow expectations, his father would hear. He only had three more weeks until he was eighteen. He could suffer through three more weeks of this.

“That’s great,” He said, deadpan as possible. The emotions he wanted to show would end poorly. “Do I know your boyfriend? I take it he doesn’t go here.”

There was a half-second glare from Lila. They both knew Lila was lying through her teeth, though Lila didn’t know how much Adrien understood that. She didn’t expect him to catch her look or the underlying anger involved. Of course she wouldn’t have a fake boyfriend that went to their school! She didn’t expect Adrien to understand that, though. He never understood her.

“You might, actually. His dad owns a fashion company, among other things. Damian? Damian Wayne?”

It took every ounce of self-taught emotional repression Adrien possessed to not react. Lila was claiming to be Damian Wayne’s girlfriend? Of all the people she could have picked, she chose Damian Wayne? He couldn’t believe it! Because as far as almost everyone knew, as far as even his father and Nathalie knew, he didn’t know Damian Wayne. He had no reason to know an American billionaire’s reclusive child, except for the fact that one of his best friends and superhero teammates was actually dating Damian Wayne and that whenever he was in Paris, as uncommon as that was, Robin would join Team Miraculous on patrols and in akuma battles. Marinette would think this was hilarious. He couldn’t wait to tell her at movie night.

Adrien spent a moment to give credit to Lila for setting her story up like this. The way she had asked if he knew Damian, it left room for her to wiggle out if he did. And a reclusive American? She could disappear off to the US for the whole summer and never actually meet Damian with her “friends” none the wiser, so it was a surprisingly low risk play. And yet-

“I don’t think so. I may have met him once, but yeah.” Lila’s smile relaxed. She had tricked him. “Good for you. How long have the two of you been together?”

“Oh, a few months now. We met at a gala over the winter, and we’ve been texting a lot since then.” There was a gala, but Damian had taken Chloe (with Kagami’s permission) as his date because Marinette was in China visiting family at the time and Chloe hadn’t exactly been out to her parents. Lila had really done her research on this one. “He was in Paris last month, though, so we finally had our first official date.” Also true, but he had been on a few secret superhero dates with his secret superhero girlfriend, not with Lila. The great part about having a superhero as a significant other, and Adrien knew this very well from experience, was that you could go almost anywhere in the city at any time. He and Luka had picnics on the top of the Eiffel Tower not infrequently.

Lila was holding his arm very tightly. He began to walk towards where he knew Chloe and Kagami were waiting. “He’s so romantic. He took me to a restaurant overlooking the Seine and we watched the sunset…” Adrien tuned Lila out. He could see Chloe and Kagami. He could see his saving graces, but they were deep in conversation and at the far end of the hall. Why couldn’t they look up? He needed their help. Lila was hurting his arm now. He decided he should start listening again.

“...And then his dad said yes, so I’m going to Gotham for the summer.” Lila finished expectantly.

“That does sound romantic. Which restaurant did he take you to? If you and Damian Wayne approve, I’d love to try it myself.” He was almost genuinely curious. For living on a travelling river boat that had been all over Europe, his boyfriend very rarely took advantage of shore leave. Luka had been in Paris now for almost four years, which was more than double as long as they’d stayed anywhere else. He and Juleka both liked it, and had settled in.

“It’s this place at the western end of town, Astrance. The food was absolutely exquisite.” Chloe and Kagami still hadn’t looked up. “I’m a vegetarian, but Damian got the steak and said it was the best steak he had ever had.” Lie. And a sloppy one too. Weirdly sloppy. “If you are interested in the vegetarian option, the house salad was pretty good.” Maybe she was testing him? Maybe she didn’t know better? It wasn’t exactly public knowledge, but anyone who knew the Waynes knew Damian was a vegetarian. Adrien was planning on at least going pescetarian when he moved out because of Damian.

“Sounds good.” He doubted Lila had ever been anywhere near Astrance. “I have been needing a good place to go for my date.” Chloe finally, finally looked up. She made eye contact with Adrien, and elbowed Kagami to get her attention.

“You have a date? Oh, I’m so happy for you!” There was too much hatred in her eyes. She wanted Adrian as her own trophy and would kill to get him. Even if he didn’t know, Adrien would have noticed. On a purely sadistic note, he would have liked to see her try to fight his super-powered time-jumping boyfriend. It would be very entertaining. “With whom?” 

“With Luka,” he said. Just like every date for the past year and a half had been with Luka. Just like he’d told Lila at least three times already. Kwami, she was dense. He was actually grateful for that, because if his father suspected he wasn’t straight, Adrian Agreste would be stuck in his room until he turned eighteen.

“Oh, I’m so glad you found someone. This Luka sounds like a lovely woman-”

“Adrien, I need your help,” Kagami interrupted, practically shoving her way through the other students. Lila started to pout, but stopped with a glare from Chloe. Kagami didn’t even bother to acknowledge the Italian. “I seem to have lost my gloves. You must help me find them.” She grabbed his arm and pulled him away from Lila.

“Of course, Kagami. Sorry to leave Lila!” Adrien called over his shoulder as he was herded around a corner and down the hall by Chloe and Kagami. “Oh my god, thank you,” he cried out in relief the moment he was out of view of Lila.

“No problem,” Chloe said. Adrien pulled her and Kagami into a hug. Chloe began to protest, but quickly melted into him. After a few seconds, he pulled away and turned to Kagami.

“Alright, let’s find those gloves.” Chloe smirked. Kagami laughed.

“You mean these gloves?” Kagami held up the fencing gloves. “Oh, well, I happened to find them in my bag, right where I left them. I’m so forgetful sometimes.” 

“Kwami, you two are the best! You know that, right?”

[fourteenacross]

end of 2019

I've done this survey every year since like, 2006 and then missed it last year because I was on a social media break. Whoops! My shitty memory makes it fairly important as a way to track the passage of time, so I'm back on the horse this year.

What did you do in 2019 that you’d never done before? I'm sure there's some specific thing, but nothing's coming to me immediately. Oh, I guess I started cross stitching? Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I'm not sure what my resolutions were for last year because I did not write them anywhere because I did not do this meme /o\ Next year: + Set up some kind of writing schedule + Finish my mg novel + Survive moving + Get a new job + Go on more dates

eta: Outside of these sort of concrete, 2do-list type goals, I set some more nebulous personal goals on Twitter: - See my local friends outside of the BFC more often - Do weird, dumb shit - Be nicer to myself - Fix my meds - Bake something fancy(Okay, that last one is kind of 2do-listy.) Did anyone close to you give birth? YES!! @caphairdadbeard had a baby and he's perfect and I love him and it kills me that he's so far away and I only get to see him a few times a year, even more so than it usually kills me having Sarah so far away. Did anyone close to you die? My former roommate's father. I did a lot of family stuff with her over the decade that we lived together and spent a lot of time with her parents and he was super loved and admired by his community. A real shitty loss all around. What countries did you visit? Just the US, but I visited Seattle and Mississippi for the first time! What would you like to have in 2020 that you lacked in 2019? ~*~Financial security~*~ What dates from 2019 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? I'm so terrible with actual dates. May 9 was Max's birthday, so there's that? We did a lovely, successful live show on April 18. OH we went to Rent Live and had our wild weekend in LA on January 26. We watched a lot of wild movie musicals at Grace and Jesse's in July. I saw Blair Witch in the woods. I went down to the city to see Octet and Hadestown. Lisa moved in with me. Moby-Dick happened. Now I'm just listing events and not dates, but there you go. What was your biggest achievement of the year? God, do I even have one? I'm not dead, so that's probably something. Oh, I guess we had a really good WBS month where we were interviewed by Forbes.com, had one of our crossovers with IDEOTV, guest edited TBD, and had our live show. That was a really satisfying few weeks. What was your biggest failure? I'm haunted by this work thing I fucked up, even though everyone has told me it wasn't a big deal. I really crash and burned out for NaNo because SAD hit me way harder and faster this year than it has in the past. Did you suffer illness or injury? Lots of brain stuff, as per usual. A couple minor colds. My FAMILY on the other hand.... What was the best thing you bought? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Tickets to Octet, maybe. It was probably my favorite show of the year. The new chair/loveseat is also very good. Whose behavior merited celebration? Some of my friends. A lot of excellent activists. Sarah's baby (he's very good). Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? Like, the whole government? Where did most of your money go? Grown-up type stuff (rent, utilities, groceries), cons, and travel. What did you get really, really, really excited about? LA, Octet, Max, DragonCon, Moby-Dick. Galentine's! What song will always remind you of 2019? Probably music from Octet? I don't like.....listen to the radio. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? Probably about the same? Maybe more stressed out by family stuff going on and money stuff. b) thinner or fatter? Same. Also, I hate this question. 2020 Kaitlyn, delete it plz. c) richer or poorer? About to be poorer. What do you wish you’d done more of? Writing. Sleeping. Going on dates. Hanging out with people. What do you wish you’d done less of? Being depressed. Being stressed. Did you fall in love in 2019? Nope. What was your favorite TV program? If we're talking "currently airing" and not "things I bingewatch that are very old," probably The Good Place--OH I almost forgot Good Omens was this year!!! Also that! And I started watching Schitt's Creek and watched all of Avatar: The Last Airbender. Oh, and I started watching some videos on the Bon Appetit YouTube channel, mostly Gourmet Makes and Making Perfect and Reverse Engineering. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? Mostly just like...........people I don't actually know who are terrible humans. What was the best book you read? Coming soon to a podcast feed near you! What was your greatest musical discovery? Probably Octet? I don't think I listened to a lot of new music this year. OH WAIT, The Highwomen!!! What a good album!!! (Also in doing the theatre section I just remembered Six was this year too!) What did you want and get? Mostly material things--clothes, cons, travel, seeing people, tickets to things, etc. Impeachment. Got that. That was nice. What did you want and not get? Financial security. A new job. Emotional stability. A relationship. More sleep. What was your favorite film of this year? Captain Marvel, although Us, Charlie's Angels, and The Wind were very good too. What was your favorite theatrical event of the year? Probably Octet! The broadway version of Hadestown was kind of disappointing compared to the 2016 NYTW version and Moby-Dick is great fun, but still pretty rough in places. Octet is just.....very good.  Oh, or SIX, that was great too! Octet or Six. Oh, and, jesus, this year was a hundred years long, I totally forgot we saw Denee as Eliza this year!! She was very good!! And I got to see Daniel Breaker as Burr again and I fucking love him. What was your favorite podcast of the year? The Empty Bowl, a meditative podcast about cereal. It is so good for zoning out and being calm. TAZ has been killing it with the one-shots and the Amnesty arc, too, and this was the first year I listened to MBMBaM weekly and also I mainlined all of Sawbones after listening to half of it, then not listening to any for six months, then deciding to start from the beginning again. Unwell is a really good show that I recommend, and Mabel. The Magnus Archives killed it with season four, which was tailored to my exact narrative tastes. MFM and Criminal are perpetual faves. American Hysteria was super interesting to go through and Bear Brook and In the Dark both obviously had fucking fantastic years. Oh, and Who the Hell is Hamish? that was fun too. And I’ll stop now.

I.....listen to a lot of podcasts. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 34! On the day, I went out for dinner and drinks with some friends. That weekend, I bought a bunch of children's Captain Marvel birthday supplies and we played Jackbox games and ate cake! What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Any sort of fix to our current political mess. And/or financial stability. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2019? The "Whimsical" section on eShakti. What kept you sane? Friends! Podcasts! Anti-depressants! Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Brie Larson and Starr Busby are the first that spring to mind. What political issue stirred you the most? It’s hard to pick just one when the whole country is on fire. Who did you miss? Pretty much everyone when they are not right next to me. Sarah Bay, a lot, but I feel weird singling one person out. [This is exactly what I wrote for the last four years, but I’m keeping it because it’s still true.] Who was the best new person you met? Did I meet new people this year? I know I internet-met a couple people, but I'm not sure if I in-person made any new friends? We hung out with this girl Jenn at con a bunch, she was pretty cool! edit: oh my god MAX I met MAX this year because he did not exist last year!!! Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2019: Do not invite folks to sit on a panel unless you know they'll stick to the goddamn topic agreed on in advance. Quote a song that sums up your year: And no one grew into anything new / we just became the worse of what we were

(I think this is the third year in a row that Dave Malloy has been my lyric of the year.)

Anyway, that’s 2019 for me. I can’t say I’m sorry to see it go. The last half, in particular, was super rough. Hell, the last week was super rough--guess how many members of my family have been in the hospital in December! If you guessed “six” you would be correct!! (Everyone is more or less fine.) 

But, hey, it also brought me my tiny nephew and two Dave Malloy musicals, so it wasn’t all bad! 

I hope 2020 treats you all well, friends!

[httphopewrld]

I Don’t Know What to Call This | (f/m/a) sneak peek!!!

Just Friends? Friends with benefits? Dating? Questions swarmed your mind when one of your dear friends, Allie, asked about you and Hoseok’s relationship. The truth was you didn’t know. You and Hoseok were close, knowing each other since elementary school, and considered each other friends. However, as you two grew older, maturing into separate professions—you a well-known fashion designer, and Hoseok a famous musician and dancer—you two had engaged in some intimate activities (sex—lots of it.) After Allie’s simple question, you had to confront your feelings. But were you and Hoseok ready to be more than close friends and fuck buddies?

Pairing: friend/lover/bfhoseok! x female reader

Genre: slow-burn fluff, some angst, and SMUT

Rating: 18+ because there’s swearing and pretty detailed smut

Warnings: swearing and SMUT (one of the most detailed smuts I’ve written, and there’s more than one sex scene.) Smut includes: switch!reader and switch!hoseok, grinding and thrusting, protective sex (USE CONDOMS, I cannot stress that enough), lots of kissing, ass-grabbing, dirty talk, a wee bit of choking on both sides, squirting, male and female oral, fingering and handjobs, vibrator use, cyber-sex, reader uses dildo, slight degradation, and just lots of filth—YOU’RE WELCOME FELLOW FILTHY ANIMALS.

Word Count: more than 10,000 (not finished yet)

A/N: Happy birthday J-Hope! Although the fic won’t be released today, or tomorrow, on his birthday, it will be out next Friday (February 26). Please let me know in the comments if you wanted to be included in the taglist, and what you think!

Taglist: @kirbykook @kleritata @taestannie @jenotation @hemmos-obrien​ @zeharilisharaban @speed-of-wind 

⊱ ────── {⋅. ✯ .⋅} ────── ⊰

You can move those over there,” you gestured to the left corner of the windowed room, where a pile of boxes waited. The move was going to take longer than you expected because the movers arrived a week later than your assistant, Rachel, said. I really need to talk to her about this. You stressed in your mind, rubbing your temples. “Are you okay?” You looked up, vision resuming its focus on your friend, Allie. Allie, your friend for as long as you could remember, offered to help you move to your new building. She would help you manage everything, including the movers, tracking your company’s items, and the layout you gave to her for said things while you managed the company. “I’m just irritated at Rachel,” you noticed her confusion, “my new assistant.” She nodded, remembering, “Right. Why is she still employed?” “Because she’s new, and being an assistant is a tough feat. She’ll get it soon.” You reassured, “Rachel is a fast learner, and this is her first mistake. We’re prepared for the next show, though, because Westley helping me organize it.” “Remind me who Westley is?” Allie asked. You sighed. “West is like my second brain. He helps organize the fashion shows, hire the models, find the venues, and secure the guest list. He has other people help him too, but he’s the brains of that. I create the fashion, and he finds a way to present it.” Allie nodded, “Gotcha.” Your phone rang, and you answered. “Y/N.” “Y/N!” Rachel chimed on the other end. “It’s Rachel. I’m so sorry about the mix-up on dates. It won’t happen again, I—” “I know it won’t, Rachel. You’re new, so I expected to slip up. I’ve gotten it taken care of,” you nudged Allie’s arm, and she smiled. “We’re luckily prepared for the next show in Vancouver, so you don’t have to worry about the mess up. All I need you to do now is make sure that my fabrics are coming in.” “Yes! They’ve arrived at the studio.” Rachel replied. “Fantastic. Thank you. That’ll be all for now. Please check on West if he needs anything.” You requested. “Will do, Y/N. Talk to you soon.” You hung up. The Vancouver show was in five months, giving you and your team enough time to design the clothes for the production and move to the new building. The show’s theme was natural bodies of water and nature, a nod to Canada’s landscape. The clothing catalogue would include various icy blue shades to represent waterfalls and warm emerald tones like flora and fauna. These colours would be encapsulated in elegant gowns and suits, worn by different shapes, genders, and colours. The materials would be made from recycled fabrics from your previous shows and from your fellow artists. You were known for designing elegant attire, so it was best to keep to it. However, it was rare to see different sized, coloured, and gendered models on a runway; because of having to customize clothes to those models. Additionally, making clothes from recycled fabrics would be tough. “Okay,” you began, “I need to talk to my design team and plan out the gowns. Can I leave you here to deal with the movers?” Allie gave you a thumbs up. “Thank you,” you smiled, hugging her, “if you need anything, please call me or Rachel, or both. We’ll be back to help.” Before you left, a thought struck you. You turned around to face Allie. “I should just hire you.” She chuckled, “Why?” You scoffed, “Because you’re here all the time!” You backed back to her. “Listen, you’re the best manager I know. You can be my third brain. You already are, outside of work, so it would make sense.” Allie seemed unsure. “I already have my job at Youth and Hope.” You grasped her hands. “You would be given a great wage, not just because you’re my best friend, but because you’re going to be busy with lots of work. You would be handling the management tasks, like West. You’d be given a good amount of vacation, trips for shows and meetings would be paid for—you could get that loft you always wanted downtown.” You wiggled your eyebrows, and Allie laughed. “Don’t I have to go through an interview process?” You brushed a hand through the air. “I can get someone to interview you and officially hire you. Once that’s done, you’ll start getting paid.” You checked your watch, and a quick rush of panic ran through you. “Shit, I’m going to be late. Consider it, alright! Let me know your availability, and we’ll schedule an interview!” “Okay!” She shouted back as you left. . . The coffee had become bitter. You weren’t sure if it was the roast or the fact that this was your fourth cup of the night. It had been a month since the fabrics arrived. Thanks to Allie, your friend and now employee, your move to the new building was complete; however, your designs weren’t translating as smoothly as you wish. “Fuck,” you cursed, taking your head in your hands and rubbing your temples. The sketches waited in front of you. The measurements and ideas raking at your confidence. Your designs are redundant. You’ve done something similar last time.                                                                       Boring. Plain. You turned back to your mannequins, still bare. The theme was in your mind, and your design team reassured you that your sketches were fine, but it all felt fuzzy. “Y/N,” Rachel peered into the studio from the door, “there’s a gentleman here to see you.” “His name?” You asked, still looking at the mannequins. You heard footsteps retreat into the front lobby, then come back to the door. “Jung Hoseok?” You turned around, trying to contain your excitement. “Please send him in.” Rachel nodded, jogging back to the lobby. You heard a muffled “thank you” before heavy footsteps approaching your studio. Hoseok reached the doorway, beaming his signature smile. He wore acid-washed jeans, a baggy white sweater that matched his chunky light sneakers. His dark hair was slightly wavy and parted in the middle. A tote bag was slung over his shoulder. “Y/N!” He cheered, opening his arms wide. “Hoseok!” You replied, running into his arms and hugging him tightly. You couldn’t remember the last time you saw Hoseok—a year or two? “Fuck, how long has it been?” You asked him. He pulled away, thinking. “About six months?” Totally off. “Seriously, it felt longer than that.” You argued. Hoseok pulled out his phone and scrolled through his calenderer and photos. He made a ‘tsk’ sound. “Ah, see here,” he showed you a few photos of you two with his friends, who were also his bandmates, “six months ago, you joined us on tour for a couple days before coming back here. I have it also marked in my calendar.” He showed you the dates, which were marked with ‘💚Y/N’s visit💚.’ “Can Namjoon or Yoongi confirm this?” You crossed your arms. Hoseok mimicked your body language. “I can call them right now,” he challenged. You two stood in competitive tension. You succumbed. “You win this time, Jung Hoseok.” He playfully chuckled. You realized that Hoseok doesn’t live around here. “Wait, why are you in town. Shouldn’t you and the others be in Korea planning another album or something?” You speculated. “Our company gave us a month for vacation because we spent most of the year touring.” Hoseok sighed. “So, I decided to come to visit.” You hugged him again, happy to see someone who wasn’t your employee amidst this chaos of stress. “How long are you staying?” You asked, muffled against his chest. He paused. “Maybe a month?” You pulled away from him, shocked. “A month? Here? That’s all your vacation time.” “Yeah,” he replied, as if that wasn’t a big deal, “I didn’t want to travel to a bunch of places because the group and I have been doing that for almost a year—and it’s pretty chill in this area.” He sighed. “Besides, I don’t think many people would recognize me. The airport wasn’t busy, and I haven’t been swarmed by fans yet.” “Do you have a place to stay?” You asked. He nodded. “Yup! I’m staying at a fancy hotel. I got the suite at the top floor,” he made a gesture with his hand, indicating how high up his suite was. You playfully elbowed his side. “Wow look at you, Mr. Famous. You can afford a top suite now. Are you sure you don’t want to stay with me, though?” Hoseok dismissed your offer with a wave of his hand. “It’s alright, Y/N. Thank you, though.” He peered over your shoulder, “It looks like you’re busy anyway, so I think I’ll just stick to my suite.” He walked past you, over to the bare mannequins. “Are you preparing for that show in Vancouver that you told me about?” You nodded, relaying your theme and ideas to him. He smiled. “That sounds really cool,” he pointed to the mannequins, “but don’t you need some clothes for the show, then?” You rolled your eyes, chuckling at him for being a smart ass. “Yes, I do. I’m brainstorming some ideas right now, but I’m coming up with nothing. I have the design team coming in tomorrow with drafts, but I’d like to bring my own thing to the table, you know? I’m the main brain of this operation, and it’d be embarrassing if I come in with zilch.” You leaned against one of the tables, facing the mannequins. “The tough part is designing gowns that fit the right people, you know. Sure, you can make a collection of clothes, but they won’t look good if they don’t fit the models.” You shook your head. “Maybe it’s just tougher to design clothes for different bodies, genders, and colours. I should just stick to one type of person and leave it at that.” Hoseok walked up beside you, leaning against the same table and facing the figures. “Why don’t you find the models and then design the clothes?” You looked at him, surprised. “But wouldn’t that take a long time?” He crossed his arms, “Well, how many models would you need?” “We’re thinking around seventy. There’s going to be two changes within the show.” Hoseok nodded, and you could see him brainstorming. “Well, you have four months left, right? You and your team can make some drafts, cast the models, and then finalize the ideas with said models. Which would take about a couple of months? You could do that while planning the show?” He paused, appearing to notice your hesitant expression. “Think about it. You’ve trained your team well enough to work on its own, right? That’s what you did for your last show, which was a success. You came in every day for a couple hours to make sure everything was in order, then focused on other things.” Hoseok grasped your hands. “You’re great at multitasking, so do it. It’s scary, but you can check on people every day to make sure everything’s alright.” You bit your lip, “I-I don’t know, Hoseok. That sounds like a lot of work—” “You did it last time, and it worked out just fine,” he gently squeezed your hands, “and I’m here for a month. I can help out whenever you need me. I’ll simply clean things up and fetch coffee if that’s what you need.” You laughed, “Like my intern?” “Yeah! I don’t know how to design anything or plan a fashion show, but I’ll do what I can.” He smiled. “You’re so much more than you think, Y/N, and if you need reminders, I’ll be here.” You smiled back at him, so grateful to have him here. “My god, you’re fucking sweet,” you scoffed, taking your hands out of his. Hoseok laughed. You pushed yourself off the table and faced him. “How did we even become friends?” You questioned. He actually gave it a thought. “You joined by dance club in elementary school, when no one else would.” He laughed so hard that he teared up. “I think we actually took club photos, and it was only you and I posing.” You laughed with him, remembering those days spent trying to breakdance to hip hop and presenting dance routines to your parents. “Yeah, that was before you joined that Music Academy in grade four, right?” He nodded, and you sighed, surprised you still remembered. Your mind came back to the present. “So, you’re actually okay with helping out?” You checked. “Why would I ask if I didn’t want to?” Hoseok replied. You tapped your index finger against your temple, “true.” “So, how much do you want?” Hoseok looked offended at your question. You chuckled. “Well, you’re going to work for me, so I need to pay you.” “It’s only just a month, though.” “Yeah, but—” “What about we see how much you have me do before you pay me?” He interrupted. “I might just have to fetch coffee, so you can just give me money on the spot.” You thought about it for a minute. Hoseok yawned. “This work talk is making me tired. Do you want to go out for dinner?” He looked around you, “Unless you have more work to do. I can always wait in the lobby for you to finish.” You brushed your hand through the air, “Nah, it’s okay. I’m pretty brain dead anyway. I need to be energized for tomorrow’s draft review.” Hoseok pushed himself off the table and clapped. “Awesome! Where do you think I’m taking you for dinner?” You bit your lip, trying to guess. “Sushi?” “Sushi it is!” He beamed. You grabbed your things and followed him out of the studio.

[bloodyshadow1]

Nature V NatureBlog:ModernAu

So this is my submission for day 4 critrole femslash week, prompt Alternate Universe.  I choose to do a modern au with a vlogger/social media because when I started it I read a few and thought they were neat. Hope you enjoy, read, review, comment, reblog, they really mean more than you’d think when writing stuff like this.

 “Oh sweet Pelor, she posted another freaking video,” Vex’ahlia ‘Vex’ Vessar screamed at her brother Vax’ildan, or Vax for pretty much anyone who had ever talked to him.

“Who my dear sweet even-tempered sister,” Vax asked half amused half mocking.  He already knew who Vex was throwing her latest hissy fit over, she had been throwing tantrums over the other half-elf for months.  It wasn’t fair, there was such a huge storm in Emon last week the meant she wasn’t able to go out and hike like she normally did which meant she hadn’t been able to film a new video.  It also meant that she hadn’t been able to visit her sweet baby boy Trinket either and that was even worse.  Maybe it was making her cranky, but she wouldn't admit that.

“You very well know who I mean,” Vex said rounding on her brother but her eyes never strayed from her phone, “Keyleth Zephara.”  The newest Druid Diaries video already had a couple thousand views and it had only been up for an hour at most.  Vex hadn’t watched it yet, but she knew it would be sweet and wonderful and oh so sickening, just like the woman who it focused on.

“Oh right the red-haired bimbo who has been the bane of your existence for the past few months. The one who updates every Saturday, which is today,” Vax said not even looking up from his tablet.  He had much better things to do than listen to his sister go on and on about her one-sided war she was waging against her crush even if his sister wouldn’t admit it was a crush.

“I never said she was a bimbo,” Vex retorted.  She glanced at her phone again seeing Keyleth’s smiling face as she traveled through the wilderness, “I mean yes I called her a strumpet, but I didn’t actually know what it meant.  I thought it was an insult that you called pretty women.”

“I know,” Vax said finally looking at his twin sister, if only so she could see his shit eating grin.  “Zahra won’t let you forget it.”

Vex didn’t need to be reminded about her ex-girlfriend/current best friend’s literal rolling on the floor laughter the first time Vex used the word wrong during a rant about Keyleth. Besides, Zahra didn’t matter right now, “I just don’t get how her blog is more popular than mine?  I mean we’re both nature blogs, but I’m the 3 time gold medalist and fashion icon, whereas she’s just a nature blog.  Why is she more popular than me? Vex’ahlia’s Visions is a masterpiece blog in my opinion, it combines fitness, fashion, and nature.” Vex had started it up sometime during the last Summer games and her third gold medal victory and it had been a very popular blog for the last 3 years.  Her friend Scanlan had suggested it, said that she could boost her popularity and show her fans the real her. While she was initially against it she had to admit it was fun and she did love the praise she received for her breathtaking nature shots as well as people lavishing over her beauty during her fitness and fashion segments.

“How could my blog be losing to a blog about a gorgeous girl who does cute things with animals she sees travel the world. It’s only been up for two years.” A moment passed and Vex was about to answer but Vex stopped him, “I know, I know her blog sounds awesome, I realized it the second the words came out of my mouth.  Still, it doesn’t explain why she’s more popular than me.  She calls her fans Kikinuts for crying out loud.”

“I mean, it probably doesn’t help that you follow her and are like half the views on her videos.”

“I’m not half the views on her videos,” Vex shot back, “maybe a quarter, but not half,” she whispered to herself.  She can’t help it, after all Keyleth of the Air Ashari was the competition, Vex had to watch her videos to see why they were so popular, at least 8 times each just to be sure, sometimes with and other times without sound.  “Still, I’m a ranger and one of the most famous in the world, how does someone have a nature blog more popular than mine?”

Despite Vex’s complaints she did love Keyleth’s videos.  They were always surprisingly informative about the places she visited, and she would always have animals in her videos that did cute things and she would talk to sometimes.  Usually she would end up sleeping in the woods somewhere making a shelter, foraging for her own food and water, living under the stars.  As a powerful druid she apparently had the ability to summon storms and perfect wifi no matter where she went in addition to her other magical and shapeshifting abilities.  Being able to summon lightning meant her equipment was always charged too so that was helpful for a druid ‘roughing’ it.

“You might be a ranger Stubby, but she’s a druid.  You both might have nature one your side but she can turn into animals and talk to them and people love animals.”

“I have animals in my videos.”

“You have animals that are running away from you little sister,” Vax said standing up giving his sister a kiss on the forehead since he knows how much she hates it.  “Keyleth gets them to gather around her like she’s a Disney princess or something. And that’s not even getting to how she is with plants. Or she gets attacked by them which also leads to a lot of views because people like to see that sort of thing.  I’m sorry but I don’t think you’re going to win this one.  Especially since you want to keep my nephew out of the spotlight.”

“I swore I would never become a crazy stage mom and force Trinket in the spotlight for something as paltry as popularity.  My child is a wild dangerous beast and my animal companion like the ones the rangers of old would ride into battle with.  Not some dancing bear doing tricks for snacks and nose pats.  The fact that he’s adorable and happens to love me with all his giant heart is a moot point,” Vex said matter-of-factly.  She loved Trinket more than anything in this world, which is why she let him roam free in the wilds near Emon instead of stuck in her house like a pet.

“That makes me proud Stubby,” Vax said giving his sister the biggest sloppiest kisses he could muster on each cheek, one for him and one for his nephew.  As she pushed him away he continued, “I know you’ve always wanted to be the type of successful woman that those bastards back in Syngorn would have to respect at least.  But I’m glad you’re not willing to go crazy over that.  I mean if winning three gold medals for archery in the past 3 olympic games didn’t make Syldor respect you, I doubt becoming internet famous will.”

“That might be because I competed on behalf of Emon and beat every pureblooded natural born son and daughter of Syngorn they sent up against me, along with the competitors from the Dwendali Empire, Marquet, and everywhere else,,” Vex said proudly.  The memories of her father looking down on her archery skills back when she was 6 still hurt, he had only agreed to let her try after her stepmother convinced him to let her try.  He had bet on her quitting in a week.  Her stepmother had given her the gold piece when the two of them left to study abroad in Emon when they were 12.  A reminder of the first time she forced her father to eat those words Devana said before sending her off with a kiss on the forehead and telling her to not make it the last.

“Syldor and the rest of them back in Syngorn would still respect you even if they hated you, the fact that they still don’t means they never will Stubby.  So stop acting like having the best nature blog will make you anything more than an ambassador’s bastard half-blooded daughter to the stuffy elves back home and just enjoy your crush like a normal person,” Vax said as patiently as he could.  He knew it probably wouldn’t get through, it wasn’t the first time they had this conversation, but Vex had a hard time letting their horrible childhood go.

“Whatever,” Vex said shrugging off her brother’s words, “why don’t you get out of here, I have a video to watch.”

Sighing Vax just decided to let it go, one issue at a time, “when you watch this time, maybe just forget about your one-sided rivalry with Keyleth for now and just watch her video.  You know you always forget about how much you pretend to hate her once you see her break out in that embodiment of sunshine smile she always opens up with,” when Vex flipped him off in response he just let out a sigh and moved to the door.  “Just try not to drool all over yourself this time or should I say don’t let her make you so mad you’ froth with rage,” he managed to say before he dashed out of the room dodging pillows that his sister was trying to assault him with.

Unfortunately for Vex this left her alone to deal with her brooding/crush over Keyleth.   She wished Trinket was there, he always managed to make her feel better, but a bear wasn’t meant for a populated area, the woods near Emon were fine since he was less than a mile away at worst, but it still didn’t mean his absence wasn’t felt.  She had a cabin deeper in the woods on private property that Trinket stayed in or around most days.  It worked for Trinket and it worked for her wilderness videos.

She waited to watch the newest Druid Diaries, she knew it would be fantastic even if she could only see the thumbnail.  It was of Keyleth sitting up in between two tree branches, she was smiling of course, wearing her classic green ensemble with her iconic antler crown framing her long mane of red hair.  Initially she thought that Keyleth had a lot of followers and fans because she was a pretty girl.  There were always idiots who followed pretty girls who made videos, Vex knew first hand when she was starting out, but that wasn’t the secret to Keyleth’s success.  While she was adorably charming in a clumsy sort of way Keyleth did know her stuff when it came to animals and plants, even if she seemed a bit ditzy at first glance.

Quietly, Vex wondered where Keyleth was going to be shooting this month.  The druid seemed a nomad at heart and despite loving each location she got to she only spent a month or so in an area to explore all the natural world had to offer with a video showing up each week before moving on.  Vasselheim was an exception though, Keyleth seemed to fall in love with the ancient city and it’s forests full of magical beasts and stayed a whole 4 months before moving on.  Her fans loved it though, everything from the forests and the monsters, to the way their idol had explored the ancient city.  She had spent so long there that there was speculation on her forum that she had joined the legendary Slayer’s Take hunter’s guild.

Vex had always wanted to go but had never gotten the nerve to.  But she would one day, she’d take Trinket there and explore the forests, see the wild magical beasts that hunted in those woods, maybe she’d even join the Slayer’s Take.  It was supposed to be a pretty open guild, once you took a contract you needed to fulfill it but it also didn’t have a requirement to keep taking contracts.

That didn’t matter right now though, she had to watch the new video her enemy put out.  Despite what her brother thought Vex did not find Keyleth attractive, just annoyingly beautiful and awkwardly  charming, but not attractive no sir. Realizing she was just justifying her actions to herself, Vex let out a sigh and started Keyleth’s newest video.  It was long enough that she’d by the time she finished she’d be able to watch Keyleth’s live Q&A segment that she always did after the first week. Every now and then her phone would go off to tell her that she had a new notification, something she normally checked religiously, but she ignored them, when it was Keyleth’s video watching time the building would be on fire and she wouldn't notice, which had happened before.  

“Hey there Kikinuts,” Keyleth started out with her camera zoomed in way too far so they could only see her right eye.  Vex gave a snort, this meant Keyleth was doing things solo, her best friend and camera man when he could Percy wouldn't have let her start a video like that. “Oh sorry, let me adjust that,” she said zooming out a bit until her whole face was in the video.  “There we go,” Keyleth said giving the camera a smile and Vex felt her heart speed up.  ‘Shut up Vax,’ she thought out loud to a brother that wasn’t there.  Keyleth might have had the most gorgeous green eyes Vex had ever seen, but it was her face that she could, and have stared at for hours.

Vex couldn’t help but notice how the morning sun just lit up Keyleth’s long mane of untamed red hair like a sea of rubies or fire.  She looked beautiful, Vex could admit that much as she sighed feeling the anger towards the innocent woman whose only crime was being more popular than she was and making her feel weird things.

“I hope you all enjoyed my last month in Whitestone, the home of my best friend and assistant Percival Fredrickstein Von Martini Koala De Rolo the Third,” she giggled.  it was a running gag in her videos for Percy’s name to be unpronounceable to anyone other than him.  “Unfortunately,” Keyleth said sobering up a bit, “Percy decided to take a bit of a leave of absence for a while. Don’t worry, we’re still a duo and having broken up or anything, he just needed some time to himself. Seeing his childhood home and his family made him feel a bit nostalgic so he decided  to stay with them for a while to catch up. You can still keep up with him @Pderolo3 and of course you can follow me @TempestOfAntlers if you aren’t already. Remember if you like this video, leave a like and subscribe, maybe even a comment.  Just a reminder because this is the first week of the month, I will be doing a live Q&A session 2 hours after the video airs so send in your questions. It’s weird to be saying that since it will be the future by then but it’s what we’ve been doing. Any way,” Keyleth said giving her fingers a snap, “now that that’s out of the way, we can start our video for real.”

It started off like it usually did with videos of her hiking for a bit and just enjoying the sounds of nature all around her. Vex didn’t usually like this part, it was fine but Keyleth did her best to be quiet for the first few minutes or so and as much as Vex loved nature, sometimes trees just looked like trees, and she had enough trees in whenever she went to visit Trinket. These trees didn’t look any different, which made Vex sit up, actually not only did they not look any different, those were the same trees she saw whenever she visited Trinket, the exact same trees.  “Here I am in the Forests of Emon, the capital of Tal'Dorei, and home to Sovereign Uriel Tal’Dorei the Third,” Keyleth said breaking into the talking points of her show where she would list the history but Vex didn’t hear her.  She was paralyzed frozen by the information that Keyleth Zephara was literally a few miles away in the forests she walked and hiked in for years.  

It wasn’t until Keyleth got a familiar furry visitor, a large brown mass of fur lumbered into the clearing that Keyleth was currently filming in.  The two of them stared at each other dumbstruck, neither expecting the other and Vex had a mini heart attack.  She knew that Trinket was the sweetest being in creation, but he was still a wild animal, she knew that Trinket wouldn’t attack Keyleth but that didn’t mean that Keyleth wouldn’t attack him thinking she was in danger.  Keyleth might not be a warrior, but she was a powerful druid, Vex had seen videos where Keyleth turned into sharks, or tigers, or giant rock monsters, she could destroy Trinket in a fight.

“Alright viewers,” Keyleth whispered into her camera, “I am going to show you how I deal with wild animals that could be potentially dangerous.  Just a warning, don’t try this at home unless you are a druid to and even then, I wouldn’t recommend it.” With that she put her phone down so she was still in view, and for a minute she glowed.  

Vex was about to run outside with her arrows, crush or not if Keyleth hurt her baby she’d shove an arrow so far up that bitch’s ass that. Luckily her rational side took over before she could do something stupid, it said that this video happened a week ago so even if she did rush out she’d be too late.  Also, it said that she always knew when Trinket was in danger thanks to their bond so she had nothing to worry about.  She had felt him be nervous during the storm that was after when Keyleth would have shot her video.  

“Hello,” Keyleth said in a deeper voice than normal, “I am Keyleth,” her voice said was heavy and harsher than normal, like she was growling.  Trinket just let out a large roar in response, Vex could tell he wasn’t angry or scared, just curious, “Oh, you speak common,” Keyleth said in response, “that makes things easier.”

Trinket growled back friendlier than before, “okay so you’re Trinket,” Keyleth responded, “it’s very nice to meet you Trinket,” she said giving Trinket a scratch on the chin.  And Vex’s heart started to calm down a little, it also tried not to melt. Seeing the girl of her dreams befriending her son  was not something she ever thought she’d see, but it did things to her. Not dirty things, but familial things that she hadn’t dreamed of feeling in a long time.  

“You’re very nice for a wild bear,” Keyleth started to say, “I don't mean that other bears aren’t nice wild or not,” she said backtracking.  “It’s just most wild bears I meet aren’t so nice or understand common.  Oh you’re Vex’s bear,” Keyleth said excitedly and Vex’s heart just froze.  The notifications were going off on her phone like crazy now and to the point where Vex had to plug her headphones into her laptop just so she could watch what could be her most important moment of her life. “Wow that’s amazing, I didn’t realize she had a bear, especially one as cute and cuddly as you,” she said in a cutesy baby tone as she gave Trinket a belly rub.  

“No,” Keyleth responded to one of Trinket’s growls, “never meet Vex personally, I saw her up close once though,” she said surprising Vex.  “It was during the games before last, I went there with my father to represent the Ashari tribes. We don’t exactly have the numbers for athletes to compete, but we were invited to spectate the games.  It was a great honor for the tribes, but I was nervous, most of the competitors were hyper focused on their own events they didn’t have time for anyone who wasn’t a fellow athlete, a coach, or the press so I was lost.   I didn’t feel like I belonged there so part of me wanted to just curl up and cry in my room from nerves and anxiety.   Then at one of the dinner after the opening ceremonies, I saw her, arguing with another athlete form Syngorn despite her being a whole head shorter than him and probably ten years younger, and winning. I think probably the coolest girl I’ve ever seen and she was my age.  I didn’t introduce myself back then, I was still too nervous to, but just seeing her stand up for herself made me feel braver. I kind of became a Vex fangirl after that,” Keyleth said kind of dreamily, maybe?  It sounded dreamily to Vex who was trying really hard not to get her hopes up.  This couldn’t’ be real right?

This couldn’t be happening, this was something after a cheesy romcom, granted it would normally happen with dogs opposed to bears, but Vex didn’t have a dog.  “I went to each of her competitions and bought tons of her merchandise, I just was so into her.”

“Do you want to be,’ Vex thought absentminded, she really had no filter when she wasn’t paying attention.

“I got into vlogging because of her actually,” she said surprising Vex when she did.  “I got a notification about her on google and saw her video for the first time and I don’t’ know I just subscribed then and there. Oh I don’t know why I’m tell you this Trinket,” Keyleth said looking cute and Vex thought her heart couldn’t take it.

“Oh Vex talked about me with you before,” Keyleth asked excitedly and Vex’s heart dropped, oh no.

For a moment she just watched and listened while Trinket growled amicably with a big smile on her face. Slowly though her smile seemed to fade slowly to the point where she Vex could hear Keyleth’s heart break, “I see she said that about me,” now it sounded like the Druid was about to cry. “I guess I could see that, she isn’t the first person to say things like that about me.  I think we should move along, there are so many nice things to see in Emon,” but now she sounded like a carebear who was told love didn’t exist.

Vex’s alarm went off to let her know that Keyleth’s Q&A and Vex immediately shut her alarm off and saw she had hundreds of notifications. Some were “Why are you being mean to Keyleth,” or “I don’t get where you get off being mean to Keyleth, she’s great while you’re the worst,” which seeing how she was feeling right now she couldn’t disagree.  Others were worse unfortunately, “I’m with you, Keyleth is an overrated bitch,” or “Keyleth is a cunt who doesn’t know anything and needs to shut her trap. Team Vex all the way,” which got a block from Vex right away.  Even a few gross ones that say things like “if the two of you are going to have a fight you should film it with jello to boost both your views.” Honestly she wouldn’t mind getting jello with Keyleth, but she wasn’t’ going to have a catfight in it, at least not for people to watch.

Immediately she turned on Keyleth’s live stream and saw that the area she was filming in was partially destroyed.  In the background of her shot though there was a cabin that looked far to familiar. “Hi there Kikinuts. There was a bit of a storm the last few days so sorry I’ve been out of communication.  But I’m here and safe, my friend Trinket actually brought me to this nice cabin that belongs to his owner,” she gestured to the, “he took me to where the spare key was so we could both stay safe and dry.  I just want you to know Ms. Vex’ahlia if you’re watching this I’m sorry, I never would have trespassed if it wasn’t an emergency.  I’ll leave money for whatever I took to survive, I didn’t mean to intrude upon your space.”  

“Oh fuck,” Vex swore aloud, the way Keyleth said her name now, it was so meek and formal, she’d talk to her father’s business associates like that growing up.  

“Anyway, enough about me,” Keyleth said, “lets here from you guys, what do you want to ask me?” She started scrolling through the chat, “Alright let’s see here there…, there’s a lot of questions asking what the deal between me and Vex’ahlia,” Keyleth said with an aggravated sigh, “look, I don’t know.  Like I said I was a huge fan of Vex, and if I could maybe talk to her, I still can be. I know this kind of seemed like I dropped this on you guys, but I’ve been wracking my brain over this for the last week.  Maybe I insulted her some way when we were kids by accident or something, but I don’t really know what I could have done to make her…, upset with me but I don’t’ want to start guessing on here without talking to each other first.  Since I’m in Emon I thought maybe I’d send her a message to see if we could meet up IRL and maybe clear the air without any cameras or people watching.  Maybe I can apologize for whatever I did to offend her.  Just don’t send her hate, like I said she’s still the coolest woman I’ve ever seen and Trinket here loves her,” she pointed over to Trinket the traitor who was just rolling around in the dirt being a happy bear.  “He’s been talking about how much he loves his mommy all week and how great she is. So I’m sure this is just a problem on my end that I hope we can fix.  I get enough hate because of what I do, I don’t ever want anyone else to experience that, especially over me,” her big green eyes were full of sincerity.

“Anyway,” she said trying to lighten the mood, “lets see about another question.  Sorry, they’re going by really quickly so if I don’t’ get to yours I’m sorry, I’m not ignoring you it’s just hard to see them sometimes.  Alright, how about this one,” she paused for a second before letting out a sigh of frustration, “no @AldarLoverL, I will not say what Vex said about me it’s private, she told her bear not me.  I shouldn’t have learned it the way that I did so please stop asking.  Moving on for…, are there any questions that aren’t about me and Vex’s so called feud?”

At that point Vex was already out the door rushing grabbing her keys and leaving her apartment. “Hey Vex,” Vax called her as she got to the front door, “are you watching…, I see you were watching Keyleth’s live stream.”

“I always do you know that, dear brother of mine,” Vex said trying to keep the frustration out of her voice.  She loved her brother, her twin, the other part of her soul, but she needed to go to her cabin and clear the air.  It was only a few miles away, on her bike she could be there in under 15 minutes.  

“Are you really going to crash her livestream just to tell her that you don’t actually hate her?”

“Yeah or at least that was the plan,” she admitted, “she’s at my cabin with my son thinking that for  the past week I hate her, I need to make things right.  Now if you’ll excuse me,” and Vex was out the door quicker than her arrows.  She tore down four flights of stairs faster than any sprinter she’d meet and got to the garage where she kept her other baby, “Death From Above”.  It was a nice looking motorcycle that Vex loved to ride, she had beaten some crazy dragonborn necromancer in pool for it but it was hers. DFA was loud but it was fast and it got her where she was going and it made Vex feel like she was flying.

It was a quick ride, luckily there was no traffic the way to the cabin, once she was off the main road it was just a barely paved dirt road to get to her little slice of heaven. By the time she got to the cabin her heart was still pounding, she all but jumped off her bike and ran to the back where she recognized Keyleth was filming.  She got back there right as she started to realize she had no idea what she was doing, Keyleth was still shooting her Q&A, it usually lasted an hour.  Vex’s body moved before her mind could catch up and she was around the corner face to face with Keyleth before she realized these things.

Sweet Pelor the Ashari woman was more beautiful and cute in person, for a good thirty seconds they looked at each other not saying anything, Keyleth shocked just as much as she was.  “I was watching your stream,” Vex started to explain, “after watching your last video.  I saw you were at my cabin and were talking to my bear.  I just wanted to say I don’t’ hate you, Trinket made a mistake.  And now I realize how unprofessional this is, crashing your shoot,” Vex said awkwardly slinking behind the corner of her cabin embarrassed.  

“Excuse me,” Vex heard Keyleth say to her viewers, and followed Vex.

“I’m so sorry about that,” Vex said her head in her hands sitting on the deck of the cabin  That was one of the most embarrassing things that she had done.

“No, you don’t have to apologize for anything,” Keyleth assured her, “I mean it’s your cabin after all, I’m just trespassing.”

“Trinket showed you where the key was, that means you’re a guest,” Vex said giving her an attempt at a smile.  

“This is not how I expected to meet you,” Keyleth said taking a seat next to Vex on the porch.

“Well if we’re being fair I didn’t you’d ever talk to my bear and spend the week thinking I hated you,” Vex said

“So…, you don’t hate me,” Keyleth asked quietly unsure if she was going to like the answer.  “Trinket said you don’t say a lot of good things about me when you talk to him.”

“I promise Keyleth I don’t’ hate you,” Vex swore, “Look, it’s nothing you did, I just…, I have issues. I promise, I’ll make a video telling everyone that I don’t’ hate you, post an apology letter, anything you want. I owe you that much.”  

“Well…,” Keyleth said thinking, “I mean you already said you didn’t hate me in my segment.  Do you maybe want to come on with me and we can put the rumors to death for real?”

“You really don’t’ mind if I’m in your video,” Vex asked incredulously. She expected Keyleth to hate her for making her think that she was hated.

“I mean I kind of dreamed of collaborated with you for a while,” Keyleth said her cheeks red, “I wasn’t lying when I said you were the reason I got into making videos.”

“Let’s do it, if it’s really okay,” Vex said standing up face to face with Keyleth.  She never realized how tall Keyleth was, even without the antlers she was almost half a foot taller than Vex.  It was kind of a turn on.

“Great,” Keyleth said jumping up and down in excitement and hugged her.  Vex never thought she’d feel like Elenore to Keyleth’s Tahani but, to quote the Good Place, “of course your hugs are amazing.”

Five minutes later they were in front of Keyleth’s camera starting their collaboration. “Hi Kikinuts, I’m back, sorry about that. I just had to work a few things out with my special surprise guest, Vex’ahlia of Vex’halia’s Visions.”

“That’s Keyleth, you can call me Vex though,” Vex said, not wanting to tell her that she liked it when Keyleth used her shortened name, it made her smile.  “I was just in the neighborhood and thought I’d drop by,” she cursed herself for sounding so stupid.  Of course, she was in the neighborhood this was her cabin.  “I was watching your lasted video, which was great by the way,” she said turning to Keyleth, “you know up until you met Trinket, my animal companion.”

“Yeah, he’s wonderful but I think we got a bit confused,” Keyleth admitted.

“He’s my beautiful baby boy, but as much as I love him, he’s still a bear and doesn’t always understand the things I tell him. So I’m sorry about that, I can defanetly say that I don’t hate you Keyleth, I’ve actually a big fan.  Subscribed the moment I saw your videos.”

“Well that’s really sweet, I’m glad that we got all that cleared out of the way, because like I said I’m a big fan of yours too,” Keyleth said giving her warm smile that shot through the heart.  “Hear that views, Vex doesn’t hate me and I don’t hate her so maybe we can drop the whole thing, it was a misunderstanding.”

“Yeah, I didn’t really mean it when I said those things to him about you,” Vex explained without thinking, only to realize what she said when they came out of her mouth.

“Oh,” Keyleth said and the look on her face could make puppies cry, “so you did say those things about me.”

“Keyleth not like that,” Vex said she was normally so cool and good with her words, what was it about this girl that made her so stupid.

“It’s fine Vex,” Keyleth said trying to keep her smile on her face despite also looking like she was going to cry.

“I’m such an ass, it really wasn’t like that Keyleth,” Vex said turning away and saw the chat was exploding asking them over and over what she meant, or what she said.  It was starting to get aggravating.

“Vex,” Keyleth said meeting her eye, despite looking hurt the druid’s eyes were also strong, “it’s okay, you said you don’t hate me and are a fan and I believe you.  You don’t have to say anything if you don’t want to.”

“Keyleth..,” Vex started she’d rather be vulnerable than let Keyleth think she hated her.  “It’s true, I said those horrible things about you, I’d say it pretty often, Trinket being a bear only knows the words.  If he was a person he might understand the nuance a bit better.  I’m not exactly the best person, I’m really competitive and don’t really know…, pretty girls make me stupid, especially the ones that I have a crush on, not the best combination,” and there it was she just admitted in front of all Keyleth’s fans and the woman herself that she had a crush on her. “Like I said, if Trinket was a people person maybe he’d understand that, since all my friends have told me I have a crush on you despite my name calling.”  There it was, Vex didn’t do vulnerable, but hey, it was a crazy situation and she didn’t have time to think about it.  

“Oh,” was all Keyleth could say as she blushed as red as her hair.

“You don’t’ have to say anything,” Vex assured her.  “I know this isn’t how you thought your day was going to go I just felt like being honest to avoid any more confusion.”

Keyleth started to hyperventilate and pulled out a paper bag. Vex was right, this definitely wasn’t how she expected her day to go.  “Shit,” Vex said and rushed into the house to fetch Keyleth a glass of water.  By the time she was back Keyleth seemed to calm down a little, at least enough to drink the glass of water.  “I’m really sorry about that, I didn’t expect that reaction,”

“No need to apologize,” Keyleth said after finishing the water, “its just not everyday your first crush surprises you a dozen times over and admits to having a crush on you.  Let’s turn this off,” she said jumping up and turning her camera off to the outrage of the chat. “We’ll tell you guys about what happens later,” Keyleth promised before signing off.  She started to pinch her arm wondering if this was all just a crazy dream, maybe she died in the storm and this was hell.

“We don’t’ have to do anything about this Keyleth, hell, we didn’t even know each other before today. If you want we could write the whole thing off as a skit we made together to show people we don’t’ actually hate each other.  We can say it was my idea,” Vex offered.  

“I don’t want to do that,” Keyleth said firmly, “I’m not going to lie about how I feel.  It’s just,” she started to say her face falling, “I’ve never dated anyone before, I’m a mess when it comes to talking to people, that’s why I move around so much and shoot videos in the woods with my only friend.  I’ve had a crush on you for so long, but it’s always been from a far. What happens if I ruin that, what happens when I ruin that, I won’t even have my stupid childish crush to fall back on.”

“Well why don’t we start off small,” Vex suggested, “we don’t have to get together and go steady right now, maybe we can start off with something small.  My name is Vex’ahlia Vessar, I’m a nature vlogger and 3 time gold winning medalist in archery,” she said holding out her hand, “it’s nice to meet you.”

For a moment Keyleth could only laugh, not at Vex, but at the whole situation, still, she took Vex’s outstretched hand, “Keyleth Zephara of the Ashari, the future voice of the Tempest and a nature vlogger as well.”

Those little gestures became conversations, those conversations became long talks and before you knew it, like and then love.  Keyleth wound up spending a record six months in Emon, despite the forests being nice but not impressive.  If it was Vex and Trinket’s home then it was the most amazing place in the world. And when she left Emon after those six months, she didn’t leave alone, she was never alone again.

   I really needed to wrap that up, the ending was getting away from me.  This was supposed to be a quick silly modern youtuber au that got out of hand. Originally it was supposed to end with Trinket telling Keyleth about Vex’s crush on her, but for some reason I added a lot of unnecessary drama.  Oh well it’s done and I hope you enjoyed it.  I realize that the characters are kind of ooc, but like I said they kind of got away from me.  

I also don’t know why I made Vex an Olympic athelet, it just kind of fit since she is a ranger class still, despite the world not really needing adventurers as much as it did in the old days.  Still, I did it and it’s done.  For anyone interested, I’d say that they’re around level 10, sort of when everything picks up in the campaign.

[theprairienerd]

Fanfiction Writers Appreciation Day: Coco Edition

Today is the day where we as consumers of fan-made content show our appreciation for those that take the time to write stories that extend universes, fill in gaps, and leave us wanting more. And since I am always a slut for good fanfics and making lists, I have put together a collection of my all-time favorite works of fanfiction. I decided to split up the fandoms, because having them all together in one post made Tumblr mad. I tried to get them all done by the 21st, but the universe conspired against me. So I’ll be posting different lists for different fandoms throughout the week.

But this post is about Coco.

Coco surprised me. When I watched it on Netflix, purely on a whim, I wasn’t anticipating falling head over heals in love with the characters and the story and the music. Immediately after finishing Coco I began looking up fanfiction. And there are so many good writers in the Coco fandom. It was hard to keep this list a reasonable amount. But I did! So without further ado, let’s get to the fics!

Down to Dust by @pengychan

Soccoro Rivera accidentally gets herself cursed on Dia de Muertos and needs the blessing of her friend Cheque to send her back home. But when Cheque can’t give her the blessing, the Riveras must search for another of member of his family to do it before it’s too late. A complex fic with complex characters and very well written.

El Amor Domestica el Corazón by @seasidefanasties

WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU  WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU

El Camino a Casa by Bookwormgal

Ernesto skimps on the poison and Héctor is able to make it back to Santa Cecilia... but not back home. Aresenic poisioning is unpleasant.

I’ve noticed that we as a fandom love to make poor Héctor suffer.

Elegy by @dogbearinggifts

It’s Dia de Muertos, 1942, and Imelda Rivera finds a familiar red book amongst the possessions of the recently deceased Ernesto de la Cruz. A fresh take at the “someone other than Miguel gets cursed and sent to the Land of the Dead” idea. Héctor and Imelda both need hugs.

I’m Lost and I’m Found by @loracarol

Instead of poison, Ernesto gives Héctor a potion that turns him into a werewolf. Three years later, Imelda runs into a giant wolf with strangely familiar eyes.

This fic isn’t finished, but it’s really good. It definitely satisfies my need for werewolves and romance. And if you are a fan of SeasideFantasies’s fic, or werewolves in general, you’ll really like I’m Lost and I’m Found.

La Guitarra by @dogbearinggifts

Based on the idea floating around here on Tumblr that the famous skull guitar is actually Héctor’s alebrije. The first fic is chilling and the last fic gave me all the feels.

Like a Gentle Refrain by Bookwormgal

So it didn't matter how good Héctor looked, cleaned up and well-dressed as her brothers settled him into a chair. It didn't matter how she couldn't seem to drag her eyes away from him or how it felt like a phantom heartbeat was racing in her ribcage. It didn't matter that the shy and uncertain nod of greeting seemed wrong and part of her wanted to reach out to him.

She had to remain firm. She needed to keep her distance. It would make things easier. It would hurt less this way. She just needed to do the smart thing. Though that would be trickier when her family seemed to be conspiring against her.

This fic... is.... so good. Just read it.

Little Bones by The_Mad_Hatter

Héctor gets roped into helping out at an orphanage outside Shantytown. And because Héctor is a good Papá he sticks around. If you need a good cry, or just want to read a fic that will rip out your heart, shove your heart into a jar of alcohol, light that jar on fire, throw said flaming jar into the window of your home, breaking the glass and burning your house down, all the while asking for more because it’s so just heartbreakingly beautiful - this fic is for you.

Neither Can You by @babycharmander

In the months following Dia de Muertos, Héctor is attacked and he and the rest of the Riveras must learn how to deal with the resulting trauma. For the record, it’s not nearly as depressing as it sounds. Don’t get me wrong; there are sad bits, but there are parts that literally made me laugh out loud as well. 

Pepita and Dante need a buddy cop spin-off.

Pan Dulce by papergardener

While the Rivera family are adjusting to life with the long-estranged Héctor, Imelda realizes she has forgotten what his favorite pan dulce, or pastry, is. And in true Imelda Rivera fashion, she will stop at nothing to covertly figure out what it is. This fic is funny, heartwarming, and just so incredibly.... sweet. *ba dum tis*

Reflection by @beckytailweaver

It’s Dia de Muertos and a seventeen year old Miguel is upset that one of his childhood dreams will never come true. Luckily Papa Héctor is here to make it better. This one made me cry. Partially because it was three in the morning when I read it, but mostly because I can relate to Miguel in this one.

Somos Familia by @whattimeisitintokyo

Ernesto grows a conscience at the last minute, letting Héctor go home to live his life with his family. This fic had me laughing and crying in equal measure. It also includes art by the author which just adds to the charm:

(Art by WhatTimeIsItInTokyo)

The Bedside Ghost by @pengychan

Instead of killing him, the bell accident leaves Ernesto de la Cruz paralyzed from the neck down. He is soon visited by the ghost of Héctor Rivera, who tells de la Cruz he can let him die, but only if he tells his family what really happened that night in Mexico City. If you like dark with a (relatively speaking) happy ending, you’ll like this fic!

The Musician with Poison Tears by @sweetiepie08

Eighteen year old Miguel travels to Mexico City to visit family and to see if he can find the mysterious ghost that haunts the old train station. Spoilers: the ghost is Héctor and he just wants to go home.

The Road Home by FernWithy

After the events of Dia de Muertos, the Riveras on both sides of the veil must learn to cope with the murder that shaped their family’s lives for generations. It alternates between Enrique’s (Miguel’s papa) and Héctor’s point of view, deals with themes of forgiveness and moving on, and has some really cool OCs. Also, Héctor writes an opera about Vikings which is neat.

The Way You Keep Me Guessing: Coco Teacher AU by @slusheeduck and @im-fairly-whitty

If you are invested in the Coco fandom even in the slightest and you haven’t at least heard of the Coco Teacher AU.... what are you doing? Set in modern-day Mexico, local Hot Teacher(tm) Héctor takes in his kid cousin Miguel after an accident kills his parents.

Un Mundo Raro by @starberry-cupcake

“All these years I’ve been clinging to the past, trying to fix my mistakes, trying to get back to Coco…” He didn’t know what to do with his hands so he took off his hat and played with its frayed ends, witnesses of the afterlife he was describing. “But you became... you”, he gestured at her, all-encompassing, as if he couldn’t encapsulate the grandeur that she was. “All the things you told Ceci that you are, how could I live up to all that? How could someone who has been clinging to the past, never moving forward, ever catch up with someone who became... all of you”

Another fantastic slow-burn reconciliation fic that will make you laugh and cry in equal measure. Seriously, I can’t recommend this fic enough.

[kylorenpunk]

Do them all. Suffer as I did 😂

Bitch I told you this was our friendship. We force each other to answer all the questions. 

1. selfie

Well… I wasn’t dubbed Selfie Queen for nothing… 

This one is interesting bc I have zero makeup on. The most recent ones are too blurry. A lot of my fav selfies are full faces of makeup tho. 

2. what would you name your future kids?

I feel like that’s a decision for both parents but I really like the names Felicity, Isabella and Dimitri. Yes, all of them are names from various franchises I enjoyed throughout the years. Be glad I’m out of my phase where I thought Vladimir was a good name. 

3. do you miss anyone?

I miss all my friends I don’t get to see frequently. Love all of y’all and hope y’all are doing well in life! 

4. what are you looking forward to?

Fucking graduating. Jesus Christ it’s taken me five damn years. 

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?

From my club it’s Chris, Yara and Josephine. Also my entire friend group from back home. Honestly I love my friends so much. 

6. is it hard for you to get over someone?

I feel like every situation is different so that’s a tough question to answer. 

7. what was your life like last year?

I honestly don’t remember much from December of last year. It was a good time though. 

8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?

I’m an emotional bitch. I’ll cry over anything. I cried over fucking Mulan the other day. 

9. who did you last see in person?

My parents and brother. Earlier in the day my club. 

10. are you good at hiding your feelings?

I’m shit at it. My face gives away everything. The other day my professor was going into her inspiration porn narrative and I just gave her a cold dead look the entire time. 

11. are you listening to music right now?

No but I have the Hamilton soundtrack stuck in my head right now since that’s what I was last listening to. If you haven’t heard it I highly suggest it. Man I wanna see it so badly. 

12. what is something you want right now?

Sleep but I’m trying not to throw off my sleep schedule right now and am waiting a bit before going to bed. I only got three hours of sleep last night so that’s fun. 

13. how do you feel right now?

Kinda tired. Relieved that I got two service projects in a row done today. It’s been a long weekend. 

14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?

My friend Sebastian hugged me when I dropped him off. I guess that counts. 

15. personality description

I’m a makeup loving nerd who enjoys sitting in pajamas watching anime and superheros as much as she enjoys swatching EVERY lipstick in Sephora. According to my friends I can’t go 5 seconds without mentioning how old I feel and my love for Dungeons and Dragons. I’m also an asshole. (Wow this sounds like a 12 year old writing this)

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?

Yeah tons of times. It’s bitten me in the ass. Oh well live and learn I guess? 

17. opinion on insecurities.

Everyone has them? If they say they don’t then they are lying. Mine is mainly related to my appearance or how I speak. 

18. do you miss how thing were a year ago?

I miss how things were in the beginning of this year. It started off strong then kinda turned into a shit show. 

19. have you ever been to New York?

No but it’s my top thing on my bucket list. My friends and I are highly considering a trip. 

20. what is your favourite song at the moment?

Of all time: Get Low by Lil Jon 

Currently: “Told You So” by Little Mix (If you haven’t heard their new album I highly suggest it if you love girl groups that preach women empowerment) 

21. age and birthday?

22 - June 21st (She’s a Cancer)

22. description of crush.

I don’t have a hardcore crush right now. More like 5 second crushes that are over the second they do something I don’t like. 

Edit: Currently “celebrity?” crush is Nathan Sharp. I am seriously considering dropping $55 to see him at a convention this month. 

23. fear(s)

Heights, something terrible happening to my loved ones, wild snakes, and the usual common anxiety fears 

24. height

Five foot three inches. I’m short. Yes I know it’s not that short but tall people like to put me in the short category anyway. 

25. role model

My mom’s coworker who was my internship supervisor. She has a doctorate’s in what I want to do and is amazing at what she does. The amount of knowledge and experience that women has is incredible. She is also extremely funny and knows how to teach with a sense of humor which I appreciate. 

26. idol(s)

Celebrity idols? I don’t really idolize celebrities bc humans are humans and have flaws. 

27. things i hate

Immaturity, intolerance of differences, demeaning slurs, The Last Jedi, and the new Fantastic Beasts movie 

28. i’ll love you if…

Play with my hair, are kind to my friends and family, share common interests, show an interest in what I have to say, basically respect me and those close to me and we’re good 

29. favourite film(s)

Hairspray, High School Musical, The Greatest Showman, Stardust, The Harry Potter series, Avengers, Guardians of the Galaxy

30. favourite tv show(s)

Jane the Virgin, Naruto (fuck off I hate myself too ok), the first three seasons of Arrow before it turned to shit

31. 3 random facts

I’m not artistically talented but I genuinely enjoy makeup and creating looks

I have a nonverbal brother with autism and he’s my favorite person ever

I completely programmed my brother’s communication device by myself 

32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?

Now my friends are mainly girls but when I lived in Tampa 90% of my friends over there were guys (Hi Mason). I’m going to say that’s bc of us all playing video games in the Delta lounge (RIP Dirty D). But yeah now it’s mainly girls and 80% of my dude friends are gay. 

33. something you want to learn

Sign Language. Ice skating. Hairstyling. Fashion (I’m trying to be better about putting clothes together). Also I’m down to learn more about makeup and techniques 

34. most embarrassing moment

Either farting while doing an air guitar in front of my entire girl scout troop

or signing to my friend that I liked her friend at a party and his brother repeated what I had signed out loud in front of everyone

wait. No. When I F U C K E D  up in front a super hot guy while volunteering and then chose an 18 year old jock as my wingman. 18 year olds are dumbasses. Don’t use them as wingmen. Fuck you Khaled. 

35. favourite subject

In grade school I think it was English or History. It really all depended on the year. 

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?

VISIT NEW YORK 

Hike the Smokey Mountains 

Visit Europe 

37. favourite actor/actress

Chris Evans (especially when he is trying to fight orange president on twitter) 

Also Mark Hamill is perfect 

38. favourite comedian(s)

I don’t watch comedians often. I guess the Fluffy guy? 

39. favourite sport(s)

The only time I give a shit about sports is when my university is undefeated or playing my first university in football. Or the soccer world cup if it’s on. However I appreciate the skill it takes to do a sport. 

40. favourite memory

San Antonio. It was my first time traveling without family and it was the greatest time. It was such a cool city 

41. relationship status 

Single - I take my sweet ass time 

42. favourite book(s)

Eragon (No, I haven’t finished the entire series. No, I don’t want spoilers bc I will do it eventually.) 

43. favourite song ever

“Get Low” by Lil Jon 

“Look Through My Eyes” by Phil Collins 

44. age you get mistaken for

Last year I got mistaken twice in a row within an hour for a middle schooler. I was 21 at at that time. During my internship one of the parents asked me if I had any kids. I’m either mistaken as a parent or as a 13-15 year old. There is no in between.  

45. how you found out about your idol

N/A since I don’t have an idol

46. what my last text message says

“lmao it’s alright” to Joey but the previous one is more funny “thankfully no one threw up this time” in regards to my friend’s party last night

47. turn ons

Well I aint about to talk about my sex life so let’s go with personality 

Common interests such as superheros or anime, charismatic, easy to get along with, common goals in life, cares about their loved ones, has passion, and someone I can hold an intellectual conversation with 

48. turn offs

rudeness, immaturity, inattentiveness, bad tempers, superiority complex, not being genuine, judging others, treating people like objects, and general lack of care for others or themselves

49. where i want to be right now

Back in the smokey mountains in a cabin watching movies and anime

50. favourite picture of your idol

N/A 

51. starsign

She’s an emotional Cancer

52. something i’m talented at

Apparently I’m good with kids      Makeup too I guess? 

53. 5 things that make me happy

friends, family, nerdy shit, makeup and Kakashi

54. something thats worrying me at the moment

Some shit happened last night that has me worried for some friends but I’m sure they’ll figure it out 

55. tumblr friends

A shit ton of y’all I know IRL. I won’t tag y’all bc that’s annoying af 

Joey’s my only internet friend @earthschampion (answer my text bitch) 

56. favourite food(s)

pasta, empanadas, crab rangoons, taziki sauce 

57. favourite animal(s)

Meerkats and koala bears

58. description of my best friend

K @burnitstronger: realest damn friend you will ever have. Will tell you how it is and provide never ending love and support. Never understands my dumbass shenanigans but loves me anyway. Love you boo 

J : Will also tell you how it is and forces you to watch Naruto and ruin your damn life. Will happily go with you to eat junk food after class. Will fight anyone who wrongs you and is def still plotting revenge on all my ex’s. Stans Loona

M: Will scream at you in Leo in a frightening but loving way. Has the best damn fashion sense I have ever seen. Is the friend that comes by when I need her to and brings a shit ton of snacks and love (J does this as well).

59. why i joined tumblr

I was bored on fourth of July in 2012 and my friends kept telling me that this website would be fun. Also the avengers “fandom” from back then 

60. ask me anything you want

I would say I’m sorry Mason but I enjoy making all my friends suffer. Make sure to give him a follow bc he’s cool. @masonjar828

[lnc2]

Taking the Rake Ch. 1: Alya and the Exposition

Summary: Alya is determined to put the D in MD-C.

Also on AO3 and FF.net

“Alya, please .  Don’t make me do this.”

“Marinette Dupain-Cheng, get your cute butt out of that dressing room and show me your new underwear.”

Marinette huffed and threw back the changing room curtain to glare at her friend.  Alya gave a low whistle of approval at the wine deep lingerie.

“That set.  Definitely that set.”

“This is ridiculous.  I don’t need new underwear.”   Unfortunately , she pouted as she looked herself over in the mirror.  The dark red created a nice contrast against her pale skin and reminded her a little of her Ladybug suit.  But fashion internships and student loans didn’t allow for frivolous purchases no matter how fantastic they made her breasts look.

“I have pages worth of text messages from you about the importance of a woman’s underwear that contradict that statement.”

“It’s not a contradiction if it’s between getting kicked out of my apartment or making sure my bathroom mirror gets a nice show every time I change.”

“You’d be so lucky to get kicked out of that hell hole.”

Marinette scowled at her friend and snapped the curtain shut to change back.

“And maybe if you got some new underwear your bathroom mirror wouldn’t be the only one getting a show.”

She groaned. “Not this again.”

“I’m just saying Marinette.  It’s been like, what?  Five months since Adrien turned you down, which, by the way, insane, but whatever.”  Marinette rejoined Alya and they left the store, sans lingerie.

“How many dates have you been on since then?  How many times have you s’envoyer en l’air?  You’re a healthy twenty-two year old woman.  I worry about these things.”

“My sex life is fine , Alya.”

“Ugh that’s just what I’m talking about.   Fine,” She spat.  “You should aspire to more than fine.”

Marinette laughed.

“I’m serious, M.  I’m going to find you a man.  You’ve been seeing your vibrator for too long.”

An older woman glared in their direction as Alya’s exuberance carried her declaration just a little too loudly across the arrondissement.  Marinette blushed and gave her an apologetic wave.

“I don’t need you to find me anyone, Alya.  I’m not still pining away for Adrien.”

“I know,” She said, in a way that said she totally did not.  Marinette pulled on her arm so they stopped walking.  The couple behind them glared at the sudden stop and veered around them.

“I’m serious, Al.  He said no.  I can’t spend my whole life waiting on someone who doesn’t want me.”

“-which is insane -”

“I’m good.  He’s good.   We’re good.”

“More than good from the looks of it,” Alya muttered.  “Which you still haven’t explained, by the way.”

Marinette pinched her elbow. “Stop it.”

“I’m just saying.  It’s weird.  One day he’s all, I’m in love with someone else and you’re avoiding each other like a cat in the road and then the next you guys are practically attached at the hip.”

Marinette rolled her eyes.  There was no way she could explain just why her relationship with Adrien had changed so drastically.  Not without dropping a bombshell on Alya about her going-on seven years vigilante streak.

“We’re friends.”

“So you say.”

“We are.”

Alya clucked her tongue and they resumed walking.  But Marinette couldn’t let that go.

“You and Nino are friends.”

“Yeah ,” She snorted, “but Nino and I have slept together.  And broken up.  And slept together again.”

“Please stop.”

“All I’m saying is Nino and I acknowledge our roller coaster relationship.  I’m not saying that you can’t just be friends with a guy.  I’m saying you can’t just be friends with Adrien .”

“Why?” Marinette sighed.  “Why is that so hard to believe?”

“You guys are… intense.  It’s intimidating.  Not to me because I’m very secure in our relationship,” She winked.  “But to prospective suitors?  That’s hard.”

“We’re close.  So what?”

The Dupain-Cheng bakery came into view and Marinette had never been so relieved to see home.  There was no way Alya would pursue this conversation in front of her mother.

Yet Alya continued on.

“Look, it’s like if Chloe and I were still in our weird post-relationship pre-makeup pre-second break up phase.  Chloe would be intimidating to anyone.  How can people see what a catch I am when they see that there’s someone around who by all accounts has probably already caught me.”

Marinette grinned.  “As we rehash your dating history I’m starting to wonder if maybe I should be the one giving you advice.”

“At least I’m getting some.”

“I get some,” She scowled.

“Your hand doesn’t count.”

Alya held open the door to the bakery.  Marinette dropped her voice as she waved at her mother, busy with a customer.

“Can we please talk about anything other than whether or not I am sleeping with someone.  We are successful, young women in our early twenties. Surely there is something better to talk about.”

The redhead grinned.  “Did you hear about what’s going on in America right now?”

“God, you had to pick the one topic that’s more depressing than my love life.”

“I just stopped a mugging in your alleyway.”

Marinette held back her startled scream, nearly upturning her laundry basket as she turned to see Chat Noir climbing through her open window and scowling.  Two months later and she still wasn’t used to his surprise visits.

“I have a front door you know.”

Chat’s expression grew even darker.  “I know.”

Marinette rolled her eyes.

“You and Alya can grumble about this place all you want but I’m not moving.”

“Marinette,” He growled as he stalked forward through her admittedly small living room.  His cat-eyed glare had frozen many an akuma over the years, but she wasn’t Ladybug for nothing.

“Adrien.”

They stood there frowning at each other before he finally gave up and sighed.  Dropping his transformation as he dropped onto her couch he muttered a disgruntled impossible which she magnanimously ignored.

“Hello Plagg,” She cooed as the black kwami circled her expectantly.  “There’s a surprise for you in the fridge.”

A strangled squeal was her reward as the little god flew off towards the kitchen.

There was a muffled moan that sounded suspiciously like camembert and Marinette smiled.  A special commission from the Ladyblog for a set of akuma plushies made that little splurge at the market possible.

Adrien sighed.  “You really didn’t have to do that.”

“I wanted to.”

“He’s spoiled enough as it is.”

She grinned.  “You’re just mad ‘cause he likes me better.”

“Him and the rest of Paris.”

“Poor Kitty,” Marinette and leaned over the pile of clothes on her coffee table to ruffle his hair.  “Never getting the recognition he deserves.”

He swatted her away, smiling.

“Just as long as my Lady knows it.”

“Always,” She hummed, returning her attention to the matter at hand. 

That matter, of course, being Alya’s ridiculous quest to put the ‘D’ in MD-C.  She should have known the relentless journalist would pull a stunt like this.

Marinette frowned down at her phone and Alya’s not so cryptic text message:

 Tonight. 8 pm.  The Red Lion theater.  Wear something to make a man blush.  He’ll be holding a yellow carnation.

 Marinette rolled her eyes and continued to sort through her laundry.  She lingered over a pink chiffon dress but memories of what happened the last time she wore the piece made her think better of it.  If she was going to actually go through with this, better to start with some fresh mojo.  She didn’t need to be reminded of past romantic failures especially not when they loomed so large in her living room.  She tossed the dress into her ever-growing discard pile on the cushion beside Adrien.

“Something the matter, Bug?”

She looked up to see him fingering the pink dress with a small frown.  She shook her head.

“Just Alya.  She’s on a ridiculous new mission and I’m the main focus.”

Setting aside the dress, Adrien leaned forward, his eyes gleaming with curiosity.  “Oh?”

She tossed him her phone and continued her search through the pile.  She laid aside a black halter dress that held possibility, although it’s low back meant she would have to do without a bra.  Which, when she thought about it, probably made it her best bet.  For all her grumbling about finances, Marinette should have sprung for the new underwear set.

“ Oh .”

“Yeah.”

“What-” Adrien’s voice was hoarse.  Setting the phone down on the table he cleared his throat.  “What brought this on?”

Marinette hesitated.  They hadn’t really addressed her ill-fated crush since they crashed into each other in an alleyway just over two months ago.  What initially felt like a blessing soon grew to be the unacknowledged elephant in the room.  There was a lot to be said for clearing the air and five months may not have entirely erased her feelings, but it did a lot to ease her heartbreak and embarrassment. 

It would be nice not to tiptoe around the issue like it never happened. 

Coming to a decision, Marinette turned to face her partner who was looking a little ashen.

“Honestly?”

He rubbed the back of his neck, suddenly not so sure. “Um, yeah.”

“You.”

“ Me? ”

She probably shouldn’t have taken as much satisfaction as she did from his voice cracking as he stared up at her with blushing disbelief.  Marinette bit back a nervous smile and shrugged.  It was one thing to think about having this conversation and entirely another to actually have it.

“Well, yeah.  I mean, I know we haven’t talked about it and really that was probably for the best but now it’s weird that we haven’t talked about it so, uh, I guess this is me… talking about it?”

“Ah… it?”

Marinette rolled her eyes and returned her attention to sorting through the laundry basket.  This would be easier if she didn’t have to look at him.  She was grateful Tikki and Plagg were in the kitchen as she didn’t really want to have an audience for this.

“Alya just thinks it’s time I put myself out there again.”

“Oh.”

She bit back a frown as she pretended to be preoccupied with folding a fitted sheet.  Would it kill him to say more than oh ?  Risking a glance in his direction she saw him frowning down at his hands, fussing with his miraculous and her heart melted.  She reached forward to settle their fidgeting.

Adrien clutched her hands and brought them to his lips, eyes shut tight against what she was suspecting were tears.

“Adrien?” She asked, mildly horrified.  When he didn’t look up at her she squeezed his fingers.  “Hey, none of that.”

He didn’t say anything and she moved around the table to sit next to him.

“It’s been nearly six months, kitten.  I’m a tougher bug than that.”

“Marinette-” He croaked.

“Seriously Adrien.  I’m good.   We’re good,” Marinette said, repeating her words to Alya from that morning. 

He shook his head.  “But Marinette-”

“ Adrien, ” She cut him off.  “I don’t want to hear anymore about it.  You have nothing to feel guilty about.”

And he didn’t.

She told him she liked him.  He told her he wasn’t interested.

Marinette wasn’t the kind of person who would hold that against him. 

She was motherfucking Ladybug. 

So she cried and ate unhealthy amounts of chocolate and wrote sad poems in her diary.

Then she put on her big girl spots and started the slow ( god it was slow ) process of moving on.

Unrequited love hurt like a bitch, but Adrien didn’t owe her anything and there was nothing more important to her than preserving their friendship.

Especially after she discovered their shared extracurricular activities.

And as close as they were, as close as they had grown, Marinette was not blind to her alley cat’s horrendous guilt complex.  Despite all of her reassurances, unspoken or otherwise, it didn’t take a superhero to see that he carried her heartbreak like a millstone around his neck.  It was one of the reasons she’d avoided this conversation before.  It was one of the reasons this conversation really should have happened sooner.

She never wanted him to feel like her feelings were a burden.

“Adrien, please look at me.” He did so, miserably.  “Have I said or done anything to make you feel like I resent you in any way for what happened?”

He shook his head.

“Okay,” She said, nodding.  “Okay, then.  This is the last time we’re going to mention it.”

He looked ready to argue but she cut him off with a look .

“You’re my best friend and I love you and I care about you.  I’m okay.  More importantly, we’re okay.” Marinette nudged him with her elbow to try and coax a smile.  “Okay?”

Adrien threw himself back against the sofa and sighed.  He met her expectant look with a scowl.  “Okay.”

“Great!” Marinette jumped up then, happy that she’d said what she needed to say and even happier to leave the conversation behind them.  Resuming her place by her neglected laundry, she took a gamble on flippancy and grinned.  “Besides, it was an honor to get my heart broken by the Chat Noir.”

Honestly, he could scream.

[ai-da-ice]

[Fan Account] The Da-iCE a-i Contact Fan Meet Experience!

On 6/8 I went to my very first Da-iCE fan meet, ai-contact 5 ~Fight Back~. Unlike with concerts where I had a good idea of what to expect due to watching all of Da-iCE's concert DVDs, I really had no idea what the fan meet would be like or what the group would do during the event. I was bit worried that it would be 100% talk and I wouldn't be able to follow well, but to my pleasant surprise, a lot of different things happened during the fan meet outside of just talking, and I was able to understand quite a bit of it!

The venue this time was Toyosu PIT, which is somewhat on the small side. There are no higher levels, only the ground floor. I was in the 20th row, which put me closer to the back than the front, but my view was still decent. They also had a few monitors set up, but I didn't really need to rely on those too much throughout the night.

I arrived a bit early to buy merchandise. Da-iCE's fan meets usually have some unique merch options that differ from their tour merch. This year's merch line up included a new lightstick for the group's anniversary year, which I really wanted so I could complete my lightstick collection. I also bought 3 pins for the group-- these are given randomly and you can't choose which member or design you receive. I got I LOVE TAIKI and I LOVE YUDAI pins and one Hayate design as well. Since I love all the members, I don't want to sell or trade, but I may possibly buy some Sota versions from a fan if I can find them at a good price!

For the fan meets, if you buy a copy of the new single, you can also receive a ticket for an event after talk. At the after talk, you can write a question for the members on a slip of paper which they may select to answer. You also receive a random new seating ticket for re-entering the building. I got ticket number #405, which put me around the 10th row, much closer to the stage than my original ticket!

The main event started at 7 PM with a video of the members playing rock-paper-scissors to determine who would be the event MC. Naturally, Sota lost, which meant he would not be participating in any of the games, but would be in charge of directing the members in all their challenges. The very first thing on the agenda would be to choose an event keyword. The staff would keep track of how many times each member used the word and tally it into their final score to determine the event's "winner." The keyword of the event this time was "yabai," a word used in Japanese for many different things. It usually means something like "incredible" or "cool," but it can also mean "dangerous" or even “scary” depending on how you use it. Toru-Yudai-Hayate-Taiki weren't told the key word, but us audience members were shown on a screen.

Right after the key word was selected, my question about whether or not there would be performances was answered as the music to Hayate's solo song "Sunadokei" began to play! I've never seen Hayate perform solo in person before, and let me just say: HE WAS INCREDIBLE! Hayate has said in the past that he doesn't have a lot of confidence in his voice and didn't intend to join the entertainment industry as a singer, but his level of control and stability was quite good for someone who isn't a lead singer! I was so impressed by his delivery!

Next, Sota also got to perform his solo song from Kake Hayabusa, "Owari Aru Tabi". As expected of Sota, the performance was absolutely gorgeous, and he conveyed the emotions of the song powerfully and beautifully.

With these two performances wrapped up, the group started playing games. In the first challenge, the members had to collect fans from the audience using different categories. Hayate had to collect people whose birthday was June 8th. Yudai had to collect people who still used old fashioned flip phones. Toru collected people with a specialized professional license. Taiki collected people who had dice-shaped fashion accessories. Unfortunately, I didn't fill any of the requirements, but the fans who did were taken up onstage and could talk to the members a little bit about their birthday or special items. I couldn't get an exact count, but it looked like Taiki collected the most people, and Hayate the least for this category.

After that, the group played a gesture game. The audience members were shown a word or phrase on the big screen and we would have to mime it for the members to guess. Some were song titles like "You&I" or "Tokyo Merry Go Round," but others were more complicated like the members' radio programs or special events. Toru ended up winning this game, with Yudai coming in last.

After the first two games, we were back to performances! Toru performed his solo song "hitofuyu". Even though it didn't match the summer weather since it's a winter song, he still delivered a great performance. He seemed a little nervous to be performing on his own, but I think he did a good ob overall! The group then got together to perform the 5 vocal, bossa nova version of "HELLO." They've gotten really strong at performing as 5 vocally, so I hope they continue the trend of doing 5 vocal songs in the future!

The next performance was chosen by a fan vote. We had three options: Stay, what you say, and Did You Know? Yudai had a sound level meter, and we were supposed scream "Haaaaaaaaiiiiii!" for the song we wanted them to perform. I originally voted for "what you say", but it tied with "Stay" and we had to revote, so I changed my mind to "Stay" so I could hear Sota's epic high note. "Stay" wound up winning and we received a great performance of the Fight Back era masterpiece. Unfortunately, Yudai made a little mistake in the choreography right when he was at the front of the formation, and we teased him a little for it ^^ When the performance was over, he jokingly hung his head in shame for a bit.

After, the event went live for about twenty or so minutes on SNS-- Da-iCE's Youtube, Twitter, Instagram, etc. We were also allowed to film this portion with our cell phones if we wanted. Da-iCE played a video announcing the release of their upcoming 4th album BET (out August 8!) as well as their upcoming tour beginning in September at Makuhari Messe and ending in January was two days in Osakajo Hall. I was so excited to hear about the album release, but a little upset that I'd miss out on the tour. It's about one month after I'll have moved back to America, and I would have really loved to see it T^T While the live broadcast was still recording, the group also did a performance of new single FAKESHOW.

When the live broadcast shut off, Sota announced the event keyword to the remaining four members and the staff showed the tally of how many times each member had said it. It was a surprisingly small count: Taiki, Toru, and Hayate had each said “yabai” 3 times, while Yudai had only said it twice.

With that final game over, they tallied up the total score. Toru won by a huge margin (his score was 26 and the next highest score was Hayate with 14), and Yudai and Taiki tied for last. Toru's prize for winning was a box of specialty food, while Yudai and Taiki had to do a punishment game of spelling the word "Osakajo" with their butts. It may have been a punishment for them, but it definitely wasn't for us! While Sota was decided what word they would have to spell, they did a little bit of twerking and model posing for us >_< I wish I could have taken a video to share the visual delight, but rules are rules!

The group wrapped up with a relaxed and light hearted performance of TOKYO MERRY GO ROUND where they spent as much time laughing and trolling each other as they did performing. They also threw out signed balls to the fans, but I didn't come close to catching any. Since I was closer to the back, whenever a member threw a ball to our area, it would hit the rafters of the building and fall to the ground.

When the event was over at close to 9 PM, we had to go outside again to re-enter for the after talk. Like I mentioned, I was in row 10, about in the center. For each fan event, different members would be answering the questions, and for our event we had Yudai, Hayate, and Taiki. The after talk was very brief and the boys dug through the questions and pulled out the questions they thought were the most interesting to answer. Unfortunately I was suffering from a bit of a stomachache this point (having taken a two hour walk on a full stomach before the event, bad idea T^T) and my concentration wasn't so good. My brain wasn't very much on what they were saying, since I was just kind of staring dazedly at their faces. Forgive me! The one question I caught was about where they wanted to visit in America-- they said LA and New York, the obvious choices! The after talk went by quite quickly, but it was good to have the chance to see them again, especially since my view was much closer than the original event.

Overall, it was a fantastic experience, and I'm so glad I got to go! I really feel like there are no walls between Da-iCE and their fans. They talk to us comfortably, like friends, and aren't afraid to show off all their silly sides. Even though their popularity is increasing, they still feel like the companionable, humble guys they were back when they got started. Every chance I have to see them really makes me so happy inside :D

[thebeautifulgame7]

Reputation

CO-WRITER: @jazzhandspotter

CHAPTER INDEX

CHAPTER SEVEN:

Sergio’s POV:

After the engagement party I received quite a few texts from Iris explaining to me that she was caught off guard and that what almost happened never should have. I found it all pretty funny seeing as I had her all set to fuck me. I was never going to, I just had to know if she was at least considering it as an option.

Like I’ve said a thousand times, I am not a homewrecker, but that doesn’t mean I can’t show Iris what she’s missing out on. Teasing and flirting was never off the table for me. Besides, when I tried to be as nice as possible all she could do was accuse me of sleeping with her, so I thought, why not step it up a little. Nothing ventured, nothing gained, especially when it comes to this.

If it wasn’t obvious already, Iker chose me as his best man for the wedding, and no surprise here, Iris is the maid of honor for Lia. I found it all to be a little too coincidental but I wasn’t going to say anything. According to Lia, Iris and I had to coordinate and get things planned for the wedding. Basically it meant Iris and I had to sit around making calls and, in my case, using my fame to get them everything Iker and Lia wanted for their perfect wedding.

Lia also gave Iris a lot of creative liberties for the interior design of the wedding. It made sense I guess, she was a designer after all. Lia also told me I could help, I guess I was supposed to be Iker’s voice in the whole decorating process. So besides making calls, Iris and I had to visit different stores and work together on some designs.

Iris actually invited me to her work space in the city every few nights so we could work on stuff, after all the wedding, at this point, was a little more than three months away and there was still so much to do. So that’s how I found myself heading into downtown Madrid with take out dinner in my passenger seat.

I had really gotten close with Iris in these last few weeks, friendship wise anyways. As far as she was concerned, the engagement party never happened, and I didn’t bother pressing it too much. I parked underneath the building and made my way to the twenty third floor. The elevator shot up and when the door opened the office was quiet.

“Iris?” I shouted to the large, dark floor, cautiously glancing around as I stepped off the elevator.

“Down here!” A voice shouted and I followed the voice to a better-lit part of the office, take out still in my hands.

“Hey, I brought us some dinner. I hope Japanese is okay, I still have to watch what I’m eating.” I smiled at her and set the bag on the table.

Iris smiled at me and brushed some hair from her face, “That’s perfect, I love sushi. Why don’t we eat first and then I can show you what I’ve been working on.” She said before rifling through the bag of food.

I sat down at a large design table close to Iris as we shared some sushi. I’m glad it worked out that way, I would’ve felt bad if she didn’t like what I brought.

“So I saw you in the papers today.” Iris broke out comfortable silence, wiping her mouth.

“Oh yeah? What’d they say now?” I couldn’t help the playful smile that crept onto my face. “I thought I was being good this week.” I laughed and so did Iris.

“It wasn’t anything bad.” She trailed off for a second and picked at some of her food. My full attention was on her now. “Uh, just what caught my attention was what you were wearing.” Iris looked back up at me.

“Oh?” I raised an eyebrow, curious about where this was going, however I had a feeling I knew.

“Yeah, I didn’t know you bought something from my collection. It means a lot.” She gave me a small smile and laid her hand on mine, rubbing it slightly.

“Of course, I thought that shirt was so cool, I had to have it.” I smiled. “I’m glad I bought it when I did. I told you that collection would go fast.” I winked at her and she blushed a little.

I just couldn’t help myself from supporting her. She had designed this button up short sleeve that incorporated masterpieces from the Museo del Prado.

“You really thought it was cool?” Iris looked at me hopefully.

“Absolutely, the whole collection was fantastic, but that shirt, come on it was totally something I would wear!” I answered enthusiastically.

“It really means a lot that you did that, and to wear it out where paparazzi would take photos, you really didn’t have to.” She looked down again before reaching for another roll to eat.

“People have to see the amazing work you’re doing, and if me wearing it in public gets you that attention, then that’s great. I just bought it because I liked it.” I shrugged. “And I wanted to support you.”

“Well thank you.” She wiped her mouth again and set her chopsticks down. “Now let me show you what I’ve designed for the tables.” Iris stood up and grabbed some sketches.

***

“You really think it’s good?” Iris asked me as I leaned over the design table next to her. I looked down at her and smiled gently. We had accomplished what we were trying to for the night and she wanted to show me some new designs she had come up with for a new line.

“Absolutely.” I answered easily. “I’m surprised Carolina Herrera hasn’t recruited you yet. You have an eye for fashion and it shows.” I could see her eyes sparkle at my response. “It’s what you were meant to do.” I said softly and reached over to take her hand.

Iris didn’t pull her hand back like I had expected, in fact she didn’t even flinch. My thumb gently rubbed against the back side of her hand as it rested on the table. Iris and I maintained eye contact for a few moments before she looked down.

“Uh, god what am I doing?” She whispered to herself and backed away slightly, letting my hand go.

I frowned and looked at her, “what do you mean?” I stepped closer but she put a hand up.

“Just stop.” She stated and looked back up at me. I was beyond confused at this point and I think she realized it.

“Stop what?” I asked.

“Stop doing this.” Iris hastily gestured to me. “All this.” She added, getting a little louder.

“Iris, I really don’t know what you’re on about.” I stepped closer again, and this time she didn’t back up.

“Stop being so nice to me. You come around and you dress nice, and you smell nice, and you just you’re so nice to me and I don’t get it. It’s messing with my head.” She explained and I could only stare, my face scrunching slightly in confusion and frustration.

“Iris I-” I tried but she cut me off, putting a hand up between us.

“No Sergio, I know what you’re doing. I have a boyfriend and I can’t just leave him.” Iris interrupted

“Hey whoa, I didn’t say anything about that.” I put my hands up to portray my innocence.

“You keep showing up in my life, and treating me like I’m the greatest girl you’ve ever met and it’s fucking with my head!” She yelled back at me.

“I show up because we have the same best friends Iris, and so what if I like spending time with you? Is that a crime?” I said in a calmer tone, hoping to settle her down.

“Well- no, it isn’t but- but it’s making me think about things. I mean shit Sergio I was ready to fuck you in Iker’s bathroom a month ago, and we’re supposed to act like we’re just friends and everything is fine?” Iris looked at me, hoping I had a magic answer. “That’s exactly what you were going for weren’t you? You wanted to tease me like that, you enjoy having power over women, or is it just me?” She asked.

I was silent for a few moments, thinking. Was this really happening? “I just wanted to see what would happen, you really pissed me off when you assumed we hooked up and in reality all I did was stay up half the night making sure you didn’t choke on your own vomit! So maybe I just wanted to get back at you.” I answered, starting to get upset with the situation.

“And I apologized! Christ, Sergio you’ve got this whole nice guy act down to a science, pretending to care about my job and my interests. You want to convince me you’re the best thing for me so that you can get in my pants and put another notch in your bedpost and then oh yeah, act like nothing happened!” Iris was getting so worked up and all from me grabbing her hand. Sure I was coming onto her a little bit, but I didn’t think this would happen. She seemed genuinely upset.

“Sergio I’m just confused, I never know what the truth is with you and how you act because it’s different every fucking time I see you.” She added, this time in a softer tone.

I stared at her hard for a few moments, “The truth, Iris? That’s what you want?” I asked in a very calm, but calculated tone. She nodded and I took a deep breath.

“I treat you like you’re the greatest girl I’ve ever met because that’s what I see when I look at you. Watching you work, hearing you talk in detail about your passions and your life is something I’ve come to really enjoy. I can’t help my feelings Iris. I know you have a boyfriend, why do you think I’ve been trying to be so nice? Maybe then I can cope with it, because lord knows if anything sexual happened you’d go crying and running back to him. You’d be forever convinced that I’m the man everyone says I am. I want to give you the world and I can’t and I’m trying my hardest to deal with that. Can you really fault me for testing the waters once in a while?” I looked intently at Iris, neither of us breaking eye contact.

“If it isn’t obvious, I want you Iris, I want you bad; but I can’t have you and it sucks.” I couldn’t bring myself to tell her the whole truth; that I’d fallen for her quite a bit. That I thought about her every day and missed her on days when we didn’t get together to plan this wedding.

I wanted to show her how a real man would treat her, in bed, on a date, in life. She deserved someone who valued her career and her personality, her fervor for life. There was no way she was satisfied by Joey in all those categories.

I just wanted her to choose me.

***

Iris’s POV:

“You can’t wait around for me Sergio. I don’t know how long it’ll be.” I said softly, still maintaining our eye contact. I suppose it was my fault we were in this situation, seeing as I freaked when he touched my hand. The way I see it though, this conversation was inevitable and at least here in my office it was just us, no interuptions.

“It’s fine, I’ll wait.” He responded without missing a beat, taking a step closer to me.

“I already told you, it could be long time, if it ever happens.” I looked away, folding my arms.

“I’m not busy with anyone else, right now I can wait as long as it takes.” Sergio answered coolly, like he had thought about this conversation many times.

“But what if one day you don’t want to wait, then what?” I looked back at him. He smiled softly and licked his lips before answering.

“Then I move on.” He shrugged, stating it as if it all were that simple. “But I don’t think I’ll have to wait that long.” He added and I narrowed my gaze at him.

“And why is that?” I asked him, realizing how close together we were now and gulping slightly. He always smelled so good, and right now was no exception.

“Because.” He stated before moving down to my level. I found myself following his movements and closing the gap between us, left without a complete answer to my question.

I wasn’t sure if he was attempting to tease me again, but as I saw him close his eyes, realized he wasn’t. I didn’t bother fighting him on this, what was the harm in a kiss anyways?

Our lips met and I swear I felt a spark. His were soft, although with a self-care routine like his, I don’t know why I expected anything different. Sergio was delicate with his movements and something about the situation felt familiar. My thoughts led me to believe that this was how our kiss went at his house. I couldn’t remember exactly, but something told me we did not kiss torridly that evening.

I unfolded my arms from across my chest and wrapped them around his neck. I felt his grab my waist and pull me closer. Sergio exhaled heavily before deepening the kiss, his tongue teasing my lips slightly. One of his hands moved up to cup my jaw and cheek while the other arm wrapped itself around me, keeping me in his grip. The way he kissed me told me what he said, he really meant. It wasn’t rough, rather it was forceful, with some intensity.

Sergio, I had come to notice had a certain aura of passion that surrounded him, must be his Spanish roots. That passion manifested itself in much of what he did, and here was no exception to that. To be kissed by someone with that kind of desire and fire inside of them was an experience I had not felt in quite a long time, maybe not ever. After growing weak from his teasing I obliged and cautiously parted my lips, my tongue hesitantly reaching out to meet his.

What surprised me the most about this whole situation was that Sergio seemed satisfied enough with just a kiss, albeit a very heated one. I was expecting him to press me more, to feel his fingers fiddle with my belt. It was a pleasant change of pace to kiss someone who took pride in how they went about it all. His experience was obvious, he knew how to pace things out, not that there was any rush anyways. No one would be back in this office until the morning.

The thought of staying here and kissing him all night was enticing and he was doing a fantastic job at making that option as tempting as it could be. He wasn’t aggressive with his tongue, but more curious than anything else. He was just as surprised as I was that I had let this go on for as long as it did.

His taste was unique, it was a little sweet, but that could be from the large quantities of rice and ponzu sauce he had consumed earlier and then finished off with some bubble gum. Thankfully he had spit that out a while ago. In any event, the taste of his lips and tongue was something worth savoring, and as a woman in a relationship kissing a man that wasn’t mine, that was problematic. I certainly wasn’t going to do anything about that now though.

My fingers cautiously reached up to gently play with his hair, slowly working their way up the longer strands on the top. Most of the styling product he had put in it this morning had worn off by now. I didn’t mind at all because it made it soft and malleable, two things I loved when playing with hair.

One of my hands drifted to his cheek, feeling the sharp stubble against the pads of my fingers. My thumb stroked across his cheek as we continued to kiss. By this point we had grown more familiar with the other, tongues had gotten a little more bold, pushing and prodding more so than before.

Minutes ticked by without either of us knowing or minding. Sergio knew how to lead a kiss because at some point he had hoisted me onto the table and moved himself in between my legs. It’s worth repeating however, that he didn’t press further than that. Neither of us broke the kiss either, for as long as it carried on. I think we both feared that once we did, our lips would never meet again.

My thoughts however jumbled they were at this point, couldn’t help but wonder what those experienced lips would feel like on my neck, or how that stubble would scrape against the sensitive skin in regions more south. He would be good at that, there was no doubt in my mind, but tonight, or any night close to it was not the time to find out, no matter how much my curiosity was peaked at this point.

With a gentle bite and tug of Sergio’s lower lip, I broke our kiss that seemed to last forever. It was a nice change to just kiss someone without it being a precursor to sex. I think once you get into a long term relationship, you forget how nice that can be.

Sergio’s eyes slowly opened as my lips left his. He leaned in once more and pecked my lips quickly. “Because you kissed my like that.” He gave me a small smile before helping me off the table. By that point the blush on my cheeks had become a burning red, no way of hiding it.

We were left with a somewhat comfortable silence, as I hastily reorganized the papers and designs that had been disturbed, flustered from the whole situation.

The night ended with a little small talk and casual conversation. Neither of us bothered to talk about what had just happened, the conversation and the long, long kiss were left to sit in our minds, idling for now. We took the elevator down to the parking garage, and Sergio ever the gentleman, walked me to my car.

“I’ll see you on Friday to get some of this ordered.” He pointed to the stack of folders in my hand.

I nodded, “Friday it is.” I smiled gently at him.

So I guess he was right, there was a chance he wouldn’t be waiting that long. I was however, left in a very, very sticky situation at this point. I still deeply cared about Joey, he was a sweet man, but had his off days, like everyone else. Lately, I was getting the feeling that I was second to his job and that put some stress on our relationship. He was growing jealous at the attention I was getting in my field, and Sergio wearing the shirt I designed did little to calm his fear of Sergio stealing me away. I suppose me kissing Sergio didn’t help either.

Even if I were to dump Joey tomorrow, rushing into something with Sergio could only lead to disaster. While he claimed he was ready, I had a feeling he would find it difficult to immediately switch to an exclusive relationship. No matter how much he assured me that he was not the huge player everyone swore he was, there was as seed of doubt in my mind. Old habits die hard and I did not want to be the one who led him to feel tied down and suffocated. I also didn’t want the constant worry of him being away and around other beautiful women.

I guess what I’m getting at is that I had thought about a possible relationship with Sergio more than I was willing to admit, and I was still left with some doubts and some of my own insecurities that I needed to address and deal with before I made any big changes to my life. For now, until things and my feelings could be sorted out, I have to keep Sergio at a distance, which was task that was growing in difficulty every time I saw him.

[expectyaytions]

Something Just Like This (part I)

🍂Fall 🍂

Veronica was in grey leggings, and black tank top as she hauled boxes from the sidewalk into the elevator. Her top knot was drooping and she was sweating. Betty, Jughead, Fangs and Toni were all supposed to be here to help and yet none of were there yet. Sweet Pea was moving in with her. She needed a roommate since things with her and Archie went south. She wasn’t opposed to a stranger, but she preferred someone she knew. Sweet Pea was around often enough, she’d even maybe consider him a friend. It was their first year out of college. Veronica worked at Vogue - in their styling department. She enjoyed it. She’d gotten the job straight out of FIT in May. Sweet Pea had gone to NYU on a basketball scholarship. He majored in communications and was currently working at a motorcycle shop in Brooklyn and coaching high school basketball.

Veronica was interested to see how’d they’d fit as roommates. She knew NY was pricey so she hadn’t been 100% honest about the rent money with Sweet Pea. Her parents were technically paying for the apartment so she was only charging him ¼ of the rent instead of half, but she wasn’t about to tell him that, even if he may have assumed.

She was unloading boxes from the elevator into the 10th floor hallway when Fangs opened up the stairwell door out of breath.

“Finally! Nice of you show up!” She snapped wiping sweat off her forehead.

“Sorry! Sorry!”

“Just help me get these boxes in please. I don’t get why he wouldn’t just let me hire movers?”

“Like he’d ever ask for help when he could prove his manliness by carrying his own boxes.”

“I’m carrying the boxes! He’s making sure he doesn’t get towed!” Fangs laughed at her dramatics.

Two hours later, the three of them were sitting on Veronica and now Sweet Pea’s patio. They were sipping beers and reminiscing about high school.

“Where’s Andrews?” Fangs asked, “he left you to move Sweets here all by yourself?”

“Archie is in Chicago. He’s visiting his mom.”

“Oh. Boring. Anyway tell me more about Vogue.”

“Please no more fashion.” Sweet Pea interjected.

“I’ll tell you what. I’ll bring you by and show you around sometime when you free. Wait until you see the costume closet. You.will.die.” She fanned herself. “But in exchange I need your friendship story. Go.” She took a long sip of her beer.

“We go way back.” Sweet Pea started.

“Like pre-birth basically.” Fangs added. Veronica raised her eyebrows.

“Our moms were best friends. They grew up side by side and joined the serpents together. They ended up pregnant a few months apart.”

“I’m older by two months.” Fangs added tossing a grape into his mouth.

“We did everything together growing up. We had big wheels at the same time racing in the driveway! Legos! We played tee ball too. Our moms were inseparable, and our dad’s were unreliable so everywhere they went, we went with them.”

“That’s adorable!”

“They even put us in matching outfits.” Fangs drawled, “do you still have the picture of us in our snake pajamas?”

“Yeah, it’s in one of the boxes - I have the one with the four of us at the lake too.”

“I want a copy of each at some point.”

“I need to see these!”

“You should have seen Fangs when we started school and Toni started following us around. He used to step on her feet and push her and once he ignored for a full week. He stopped when she punched him in the stomach. The three of us have been friends ever since.”

“But we’re closer.” Fangs smiled, “right?”

“My ‘best’ keychain says yes.” Veronica cackled you guys have best friend keychains! That’s the cutest!”

Once the six pack was gone, they opened a bottle of wine. Betty texted and said they were on their way with pizza. Fangs assured her Sweet Pea was a good roommate. “He always cleans the sink after he shaves and he does his own dishes.”

“We have a dishwasher, so that won’t be a problem. We also have a cleaning lady she comes every Monday at 10am. She also does the laundry. So make sure everything is in the basket in your room or the bathroom.”

“Dude! You’re living the high life now.”

“I’m not sure I can afford a cleaning lady.” He admitted wearily.

“I’ve got it covered don’t worry.” He was about to add something when Betty and Jughead made their appearance.

“Finally! I thought you were going to leave us to starve to death!” Fangs jumped up to grab the pizza boxes. “And you brought more beer! Sweet!”

“Sorry we’re late. I had an interview.” Everyone went silent, and turned to look at the blonde.

“The interview?” Fangs tried to whisper to Sweet Pea. Betty nodded.

“And I got the job!” They all jumped up and group hugged her and Jughead.

“Betty! That’s fantastic. When do you start?” Veronica asked.

“Not until next week.”

“This calls for champagne! I’ll be right back!” Veronica hurried inside.

“Investigative reporting for The New York Times. It’s incredible B.” Veronica gushed over her friend.

“You’re glorifying it. I write book reviews, and upcoming book signings.”

“It’s still awesome, and it’s a foot in the door.” They were sitting on the patio, knees to their chests with oversized sweaters drinking wine and picking over fruit salad. The guys had gone inside to help Sweet Sweet Pea put his bed together.

“So where’s Archie?” Betty asked, “and don’t tell me Chicago.”

“He went to LA.”

“What!”

“I know. He didn’t want anyone to know.”

“How do you feel about that?”

“Well considering he and I were off and on and then basically just fucking; I really don’t care.”

“V-“

“Last time I saw he was being rode on by some chick with dreads and a peace sign tramp stamp - and not even the sign like the hand peace sign.” Betty was cackling.

“You’re joking?!”

“Nope.” She confirmed, popping the p. “Safe to say Archiekins and I are donezo.”

“Onward to new beginnings!” Betty cheered holding up her glass. “New jobs and new relationships!” Veronica clicked glasses and laughed.

-//-//-//-//-

Living with Sweet Pea was surprising easy. He was never home. They’d been living together for just over a month and she’d only seen him a handful of times. They were both usually home on Sunday afternoons or nights. Veronica would go to her sunrise yoga class and then pick up pastries and coffee at her fav bakery next door. Sweet Pea was usually still asleep when she got home. She’d work out a little in the living room -usually cardio. Depending on the weather -she’d drink her coffee and eat her breakfast outside. She would bring a book or magazines and relax until Betty, Jughead and Fangs came over they’d make sandwiches for lunch and catch up on their weeks. The crew would leave by late afternoon and she and Sweet Pea had started watching Boardwalk Empire. They were flying threw it. They’d order dinner out and watch for a few episodes. One night she fell asleep while they were watching and she woke up in her bed. She’d always been a bit of a heavy sleeper. She was a little embarrassed, but he never brought it up and neither did she. It was the start of them being more affectionate and loose around each other. She’d fake punch his arm and he’d wrap an arm her waist to move her if she was in the way. She’d also taken to propping her feet in his lap. Which he would whine about but then move then back to his lap. They were comfortable with one another.

-//-//-//-//-

Summer ended, and fall hit New York with a flurry of colors. Veronica managed to get Fangs a job at Vogue. It was primarily answering phones, But he loved it. She liked having someone in the office to eat lunch with and share gossip. He was also good for knowing things about Sweet Pea - like how he took his coffee or his preferred pastry, black and chocolate croissant. He knew that Sweet Pea had a sweet tooth and was a sucker for chocolate. This came in handy for Sundays. She’d pick him up coffee and a croissant they’d sit on the patio or at the kitchen bar. They’d read Betty’s Sunday selection for a review and decide whether they’d actually ready it or not. That was one thing that surprised her -Sweet Pea loved to read. Fangs during one of their coffee runs admitted he had a huge crush on one of the guys that worked with Veronica, and she’d been trying to set them up. She had invited Noah to last Sundays brunch and it seemed like they hit it off. Now she needed someone for herself.

“Have you tried tinder?” She asked Sweet Pea from his chair on the patio. He looked at her confused.

“Where is this coming from?”

“It’s a dating site, right?”

“No, Christian Mingle is a dating site, tinder is a hook-up app.”

“Oh.” She looked confused, “Fangs said I should try it.”

“Don’t listen to anything Fangs says. He watched Barney until he was like 10.” She raises eyebrows her but says nothing slumping her shoulders. “Look, I don’t know all the details with about what happened with Andrews, but you’re pretty, nice, funny and you shouldn’t have a hard time in the New York dating scene.

“It’s just so much effort.” She whined. He laughed at her.

“You got this. Just remember sock on door.” He tipped his coffee cup at her.

-//-//-//-

The following Sunday Sweet Pea found Veronica in a pair of short spandex and and a sports bra jumping around the living room.

“What the fuck are you doing?”

“It’s cardio.”

“It’s something.” He joked. “Did you get coffee?”

“Yeah, it’s on the stove.” She heard him in the kitchen, but turned back to her work out.

Once she was finished, she joined Sweets outside. He handed her the around town and fashion sections of the newspaper while she propped her feet on his legs.

“So how was your first weekend on the prowl?”

“I’m not cut out for dating. I think I’ll buy a cat and become a spinster.” He laughed at her. “Don’t laugh.”

“It couldn’t have been that bad.”

“Some guy approached me at the bar. He was so full of himself, and was like molesting me. I had to get Fangs to come over to get this guys claws out of me. There was another guy he was sweet, but idk, sleazy and touchy feely. However Fangs was a little too eager to be a wingman and we went to a million bars.” Sweet Pea laughed.

“You know what they say, once you stop looking you’ll find someone.”

“People say that?”

“Yeah. All the time.”

“Well I’m done looking.”

“Give it a few more tries. What have you got to lose?”

“My time and dignity.” He rolled his eyes at her.

“Well maybe you should try tinder then. You wouldn’t have to go out. You could meet someone from the comfort our couch.”

“Sounds tempting. Maybe I’ll try it tonight while we watch Boardwalk.” She took a sip of her coffee. “Anyway, what does Betty have for us today?” She pinched a piece of her croissant off and put it in her mouth.

They ended up not watching Boardwalk, instead Fangs brought over the film, Love, Simon and they ended up all staying up late watching the film and reminiscing about high school. Jughead and Betty slept in the guest room and Fangs crashed in Sweet Pea’s room. They all had Monday off due to Columbus Day so they spent the morning binge watching the first season of Shameless. They were onto the fourth episode and awaiting the arrival of Chinese food, still dressed in their sweatpants and drinking bloody Mary’s and mimosas courtesy of Betty and Veronica. They had filled the floor with blankets and pillows and were enjoying the ridiculousness of the show.

Jughead kept exclaiming -“ how have we not seen this before?!”

And someone would give in and say “I know!” When the doorbell rang -Jughead took off running singing about his hunger pains.

“Your grocery bill must be through the roof.” Fangs commented.

“You have no idea. Thankfully he eats a lot of cereal. Mostly because he can’t cook anything besides pasta.”

They heard the door shut and expected to see Jughead carrying bags of Chinese. Instead a certain ginger ex boyfriend of Veronica’s was standing next to him.

[flirting-with-psychology]

2014/2015/2016/2017 New Years Survey

Adding in 2017

1: What did you do in 2014/2015/2016/2017 that you’d never done before?

2014: Had sex

2015: Got further in my love life

2016: Went to the PAC 12 Championship, and about to go to a bowl game

2017: Graduated and moved in with friends

2: Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? 2014: I don’t think I actually made any. I might try to this year

2015: I kept a lot of them, and I will probably make new ones

2016: I can’t remember what they were. I might make new ones

2017: I can’t remember what they were. I am making new ones

3: Did anyone close to you give birth? 2014: No

2015: No

2016: My mom’s ex-boyfriend’s daughter

2017: No

4: Did anyone close to you die? 2014: No

2015: No

2016: My friend Zach, although we hadn’t really talked much for a couple of years so we weren’t close anymore

2017: No

5: What countries did you visit? 2014: I stayed in my home country this year, but hopefully I will travel more in 2015 or 2016, I am planning to study abroad

2015: I stayed in my home country but I am planning to study abroad in 2016

2016: I studied abroad in Italy :)

2017: I went to London with my mom

6: What would you like to have in 2015/2016/2017/2018 that you lacked in 2014/2015/2016/2017? 2014: A boyfriend, more confidence, and a more interesting personality

2015: A boyfriend and more confidence

2016: A boyfriend already goddamnit it’s time

2017: An official boyfriend and a film job

7: What dates from 2014/2015/2016/2017 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? 2014: 12/13/14, the day I had sex, and it was interesting because I had my first kiss on 11/12/13

2015: 9/3/15 was the day of the Old Chicago watch party where Hawaii flirted me.

2016: 6/8/16 the day I found out Zach had died

2017: 8/21/17, the solar eclipse

8: What was your biggest achievement of the year? 2014: I think my Blank Space video was cool. Also I got a job

2015: Maybe finally starting to go to the gym and get confidence

2016: My short film Pancakes, which had a full film crew

2017: Graduated college

9: What was your biggest failure? 2014: Letting myself remain unhappy instead of figuring out how to change it

2015: Losing some of the confidence I gained in the fall

2016: Kinda giving up on trying, in various ways

2017: Did not get back into working out

10: Did you suffer illness or injury? 2014: I had a trifecta of stomach flu, pink eye, and common cold during finals week. I also cut my foot open at Water World and it got infected

2015: I was sick for a month from kissing Hawaii

2016: Yeah, that month-long Hawaii plague kinda turned into a year-long strike from my immune system. Also, I got a node in my thyroid. So far it’s benign, just a weird lump

2017: I had to get surgery to remove the thyroid node

11: What was the best thing you bought? 2014: A Netflix subscription

2015: My TV

2016: All my Italy souvenirs. Idk I can’t pinpoint one thing

2017: Sebastian the pirate merman ornament

12: Whose behaviour merited celebration? 2014: My mom’s boyfriend is finally apologizing to her and trying to make up for cheating on her last year, and he actually seems to be working really hard to change

2015: Vincent has become close friends with me and shows a lot of bravery in how he handles things

2016: The football team finally got good

2017: My film class for all we accomplished and helping each other on projects

13: Whose behaviour made you appalled? 2014: There were a few guys who bailed on me without explanation, but the biggest one is my friend who stopped talking to me, apparently because I vented to her too much, but did not give me any chance to fix it and seems to hate me now

2015: All the guys who were too cowardly to text me back

2016: This one dude in Italy on my study abroad program made out, etc with me, then told me not to tell anyone because there was a different girl he wanted to get with

2017: My friend and his girlfriend got mad at me for seeking out another ride because they drove recklessly

14: Where did most of your money go? 2014: A lot went into camera and film equipment rentals. Unfortunately quite a bit also went into the vending machine

2015: Random stuff, and more than usual went to holiday presents

2016: Groceries and clothes and knick knacks

2017: Rent

15: What did you get really, really, really excited about? 2014: I went to the Telluride Film Festival with a school group

2015: Getting to go on a band trip

2016: Getting to go on 3 (three!) band trips

2017: Graduating and London

16: What song will always remind you of 2014/2015/2016/2017? 2014: Songs tend to remind me of people, and the songs that remind me of the people of 2014 are “Don’t Cha” for Captain and “Wildest Dreams” for Marble. Also, Blank Space for all of them

2015: Taylor Swift’s 1989 album

2016: Shut Up and Dance

2017: Not sure if I have one. Maybe the Anastasia soundtrack

17: Compared to this time last year, are you: (a) happier or sadder? (b) thinner or fatter? © richer or poorer? 2014: A) Maybe a little sadder. I’m just getting more desperate as more time passes with me single. B) About the same, maybe a couple pounds fatter. C) Richer, now that I have a job

2015: A) Happier. B) Thinner. C) About the same, maybe a little richer. I’m not excellent at saving

2016: A) Happier. I was about to say sadder, because I think this year as a whole I’ve been sadder than last year as a whole, but I remembered that in december I was trying to get over Hawaii and that sucked ass. B) Fatter. C) About the same, maybe a bit richer

2017: A) About the same. Maybe a little sadder, I kind of miss college. B) Probably about the same. C) Probably poorer because I actually have to pay rent now. But I also make a lot more money so maybe it evens out

18: What do you wish you’d done more of? 2014: Adventures, swing dancing, and maybe a little more textbook reading

2015: Enjoying myself and trying new experiences, and getting the most out of school

2016: Exercising, making friends in Italy

2017: I wish I had done more in college as a whole

19: What do you wish you’d done less of? 2014: Fighting with my parents, perhaps, and maybe less being sad or worried around people because clearly it pushes them away

2015: Worrying about things

2016: Thinking about Hawaii

2017: Strategizing

20: How did you spend Christmas? 2014: With my mom’s boyfriend’s family

2015: Oops awk, I’m doing this early. But I will spend it with my mom’s boyfriend’s family

2016: Lol I’m doing it early again. I think I am just gonna be chilling, I’ll probably do Hanukkah that night

2017: I keep doing it early. Idk maybe watch a movie or something

21: Did you fall in love in 2014/2015/2016/2017? 2014: No, I don’t think so. Maybe, with Captain a little

2015: Not quite

2016: I stayed in love with Captain. I’m pretty sure that started before this year but maybe not. I told him that I loved him this year, though

2017: Almost maybe, but not quite

22: What was your favourite TV program? 2014: Supernatural

2015: How to Get Away With Murder

2016: Suits

2017: Friends

23: Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? 2014: My friend who hates me, I’m starting to hate her back

2015: I still don’t really hate anyone

2016: Don’t really hate anyone

2017: Yeah. Didn’t know her last year

24: What was the best book you read? 2014: Mistborn

2015: The Testing, maybe

2016: Mistborn series

2017: Mistborn series. Also not quite a book but the Choices game

25: What was your greatest musical discovery? 2014: Blank Space

2015: Shut Up and Dance

2016: Collabro

2017: Anastasia the Musical

26: What did you want and get? 2014: A job, new experiences

2015: More confidence, losing weight, better friend relationships

2016: A bowl trip, a summer abroad

2017: I may be on the path to getting a boyfriend?

27: What did you want and not get? 2014: A boyfriend, to lose weight, more confidence and conversational skills

2015: A boyfriend

2016: A boyfriend

2017: Cadence

28: What was your favourite film of this year? 2014: The Imitation Game or Guardians of the Galaxy

2015: The Martian or Inside Out

2016: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

2017: Coco

29: What one thing made your year immeasurably more satisfying? 2014: Being in college

2015: Better friend relationships

2016: The football team doing well

2017: Graduating

30: How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2014/2015/2016/2017? 2014: Lazy

2015: Thift-shoppy

2016: Lazy

2017: Lazy when I was in school except for the days I saw Cadence, and then more fashionable when I got my job

31: What kept you sane? 2014: Hope for the future

2015: Belief in myself I guess

2016: Genetics and environmental factors that have not yet caused insanity

2017: Not sure

32: Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? 2014: Chris Pratt

2015: Still Chris Pratt I think

2016: Chris Pratt is a sexy, sexy man

2017: Yup. Or Kit Harington

33: What political issue stirred you the most? 2014: Probably the Leelah Alcorn suicide that just happened

2015: The presidential debates are happening

2016: The presidential election, first one that I got to vote in

2017: Maybe Net Neutrality

34: Who did you miss? 2014: My friend who hates me

2015: Hawaii

2016: Hawaii and Zach

2017: I missed Jessie while we were fighting

35: Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2014/2015/2016/2017. 2014: Let it Go

2015: Bravery means going after what you want

2016: The importance of storyboarding

2017: Strategizing just wastes time

36: Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. 2014: Got a long list of ex-lovers, they’ll tell you I’m insane

2015: I almost brought him up, but you start to talk about the movie that your family watches every single Christmas, and I’ll talk about that, for the first time, what’s past is past

2016: Buffaloes, Buffaloes, Go CU

2017: School’s out forever