#Zane rants

[zanenindroid]

Zane Rants

I...dont understand? How come Cole is always referred to as the chill hot guy in the group, that should be MY role, my super power IS being chill, it's my thing, and how can you be hot AND chill, it's one or the other, how come you think he's so hot anyways? he's a Lego figure. LEGO! are you hearing yourself? you are horny for a Lego figure, that uses his friends' tooth brush, and LEAVES THE TOILET SEAT UP. I am not jealous. far from it. i pity Cole, for being so mischaracterized by the public, but most importantly i pity you dear viewer for thinking that this hack of a human being, who only came to this earth because some frauds decided it was funny if a Lego figure had black hair and so drew him into existence, meanwhile i was one of the first created. Cole. Was. A. Mistake.

[zanenindroid]

I have a life...i will not always risk wasting it chasing around my fellow ninja. There's 3 of them, meaning 6 legs that aren't broken, not sure why mine always has to be the one to get broken..is it because i'm a robot? i am...offended

One thing I am yet to understand is why they didn’t send Zane after Jay when he got sent away, since he lost before Jay. Like I know logistically they needed Zane there but also…

[mystii-gur0]

So when are we as Ninjago fans finally going to talk about the fact that Zane canonically has the robot equivalent to a CDD (complex dissociative disorder, stuff like DID and OSDD).

Like the way the Ninjigma functions is INCREDIBLY similar to structural dissociation. Layers upon layers of encryption to stop you from remembering something horrible that happened to you? Then when you go poking around in that like memory vault, your own mind shuts you down or in some cases forces you to harm yourself? Yeah. That's structural dissociation.

And his struggles with his identity is very very typical of CDDs. Like that whole thing in season four (yk directly after one of the most traumatic moments of his life, FUCKING DYING) where he didn't feel like "Zane" anymore and felt like he couldn't call himself the white ninja because he wasn't the white ninja, he's just a copy of a dead man. Like that's VERY host change coded to me at least.

And like the way he tends to like freeze up when triggered (cause keep in mind, CDDs don't exist independently, they always come with PTSD/C-PTSD) especially when they're talking about going into battle or like talking about literally anything to do with the Overlord ever. He starts playing with his hands and biting his lip like he's trying to calm himself down, until they actually go into battle and he's fine again (alter switch).

Don't even get me started on the Ice Emperor. Like the fact he only turns back into him as he's dying in Crystalized (an incredibly triggering situation for him.)...

And like the way he just completely dissociates and disconnects himself after Nya disappears and seems to be doing something similar in Dragon's Rising because Pixal is missing (side note I hate Dragon's Rising. If you like Dragon's Rising I think you should have your Ninjago fan card revoked lowkey.... I couldn't even finish it).

Anyways Zane is severely traumatized and half the fans + the writers tend to forget that a log but it's my favorite thing to yap about.

No idea if this made any sense whatsoever.

He's so Language of the Lost and Am I Awake? coded...

[silkieluv]

I seriously hate it when people start to villainize characters (let’s say, Kai) just to make more (let’s say, Jay) angst

Like no Rodrick, Kai didn’t beat Jay up for flirting with Nya. You know why? Because by that time Jay was better than Kai (Jay got more training since it was just the start and he joined 2nd, not 4th), and then Kai and Jay spend like every hour of the day together whether it’s training, eating or just chilling.

Yes, Kai will always be Nya's #1, but to the point he would beat Jay up?? Are you demented??

No, Jane, Nya wasn’t abusive towards Jay and forced him into a relationship. That in your sick head so you could have a reason for their breakup so you could ship Jay and Cole! (No hate to Bruise. Bruise supremacy)

NO, ALEX, OKAY? SKYLOR ISNT HOMOPHOBIC AND HER AND KAI DIDNT BREAK UP BECAUSE SHE FOUND OUT KAI ALSO LIKES BOYS.

NO, DENNIS, JAY KAI AND COLE WOULD NEVER BULLY ZANE TO HURT HIM THEN LAUGH AT HIM

SHUT UP, KIM. ED AND EDNA ARE BEAUITFUL PARENTS AND YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF TRYING TO TURN THEM EVIL JUST FOR MORE JAY ANGST.

Shame 🫵🏻.

[mmmilkweed]

Hi, I'm sorry but you were on fucking GOOGLE PLUS?? I know that's not really something to be shocked about but GOD it seems like NOBODY I know knew what it was, and now I find out my favorite CRK artist was on there 😭

Yea lmao

It was my bread and butter. Literally nothing could ever beat it, the layout, the communities. I remember being a member of a pretty big Aphmau fanclub

[llannasvsp]

I JUST LOVE THEM ALL SO MUCH THEY'RE JUST LITTLE SILLIES. NOTHING BAD WILL EVER HAPPEN TO THEM. TRUST.

I HAVE TOO. MANY. EMOTIONS. ABOUT THEM. HELP.

[wompwompland]

YOU KNOW WHAT I WOULD'VE LOVED TO SEE? THE IMPACT OF ZANE BEING THE ICE EMPEROR FOR 60 YEARS.

HE WAS THE ICE EMPEROR LONGER THAN HE'S BEEN A NINJA.

HE KILLED ALMOST ALL OF THE YETIS. HE FROZE THE FORMLING VILLAGE. HE CORRUPTED THE SAMURAI. All of that goes against his base directive - to protect those who cannot protect themselves.

I NEED to see the emotional impact on Zane, and eventually the rest of the team. Bonus points if it comes with seeing the impact on Zane's body, since he definitely didn't get any maintenance in his time in the Never-Realm.

[jojilovesninjas]

How I feel when I do my daily scroll through the ninjago Subreddit and see mother fuckers are still complaining about the redesigns. ITS BEEN 7 YEARS LET IT THE FUCK GO GUYS!!!

[alien-of-earth]

Listen there are so many good dynamics to come out of Ninjago, but to me glacier (or Cole and Zane) are so special.

Like they really have everything. They have opposing color schemes (black/white, warm/cool). They’re the brains and the brawn. They’re the most mature members on the team. They work so well with one another. They switch between goofy and stone cold serious. They both have vowed (by their parents wishes) to stop evil and protect the innocent. They both had crises due to not being human. They have arcs surrounding feeling empowered even in their new bodies. They both have been fucked over by the plot so many times and yet refuse to die.

I love those two so much, truly the couple ever

[zane-master-of-ice]

i have not been on the internet for very long, but ever since joining i have encountered something on many websites i have developed an extreme dislike for, and that is captchas.

you know, these:

i understand that they are meant to prevent robots from using your website, but sometimes i feel as though they are made to be too difficult for even some people to pass, including myself! i regularly have to try multiple times to pass these captchas, because the website thinks that i am a robot, which is obviously ridiculous, and a clear sign that they are a poorly designed security feature, and they are only driving people away from using the websites that they want to use. i doubt that any tech developers are reading this, but if you are maybe you can work on a better web security system that only keeps the robots out, and not actual people, because this is getting ridiculous!

apologies for the rant, but this is something that i have been frustrated about for several days now, and i needed to get it off of my chest.

if anyone else has encountered this problem please let me know.

[kindaasrikal]

Lloyd absolutely enjoys tackling people. Like out of pure random. Cole could be holding cake and that would still not keep him safe from a dragoni human hybrid with unimaginable power to full on tackle him and then run away cackling.

Kai does that thing with Nya where they both tickle each other at random. Like one second they’re all serious in a meeting, the next Wu has to pull them apart because Nya poked a very specific, very ticklish area on Kai’s waist that made him squeak like a lil girl. Kai also gets his revenge by jabbing his arm into her armpit to tickle her and it aches hours later.

Cole enjoys walking into Jay’s room after he’s been there for hours just to annoy him. Like Jay’s just trying to play a video game, or maybe talk to someone on the phone, and Cole just walks in and starts annoying him. Touches the screen of the game to make Jay lose, starts talking about embarrassing stuff about Jay rlly loudly, lays and spreads himself over his bed. Zane walks in after hearing screaming and insulting and kinda just watches. He finds it hilarious.

Whenever it’s late and they need to wake one of them up, Zane always volunteers because he makes his eyes shine the brightest blue ever and stares wide eyed at the person- let’s say Lloyd in this one- and uses a completely stupid accent to say their name as a whisper echo thing. “Lloyd….Lloyddddd……” in a British accent is all he can hear before opening his eyes in confusion only to see a dark figure with glowing blue eyes towering over him.

No, Nya, he did not throw a pillow at Zane whilst screaming higher than even Kai can. That was her imagination.

Im sorry guys i just need them acting more like siblings because they would absolutely do this.

[zanenindroid]

Zane Rants - Jay's Prank

Today, during our training session, Jay thought it would be amusing to replace my tea with motor oil. While I appreciate his attempt at humor, the taste left much to be desired. Note to self: remind Jay that my fuel preferences are not up for experimentation. 🤖☕️

[caricabubamarica]

Since I’ve discovered Lego Ninjago at the ripe age of seven, the biggest fantasy of mine has always been to be one of the ninja on the team, fighting alongside the core four and dealing with Serpentine and so on. When I was a little girl, the only way I could satisfy the urge was to use my imagination.

So when the Covid 19 hit back in 2020, and I discovered Wattpad for the first time in my life, it was as if I had entered a whole new world based off of the imagination of other people all across the world. I was spending days and nights on it until there was nothing worth reading for me.

Back in 2022, I finally decided to catch up on the show, seeing it pop up on my Netflix account and decided to give it a go. Before so, I had developed a habit of reading dozens of fan fictions about the show I was at the moment hooked onto, so once I finished watching all of the Ninjago seasons, I went through any fan fiction on Wattpad that I could find regarding Ninjago x reader/original character and quickly noticed a pattern that made me grow bored of whatever book I was reading rather quickly.

Every single fan fiction, save for few rare ones, had the main character be an elemental master of darkness/destruction.

Every. Single. One.

Now at first, I thought the issue stemmed from the fact that there was an obvious lack of originality and uniqueness, but it actually originated from the fact that every story had the exact same storyline, and I mean the exact same one.

The main character would be an elemental master of darkness/destruction and because the elemental powers are inherited, the character is obviously the child of Lord Garmadon and a sibling of Lloyd. Of course, let’s not forget that the character has extreme protectiveness over Lloyd and despises their mother with concerning levels of rage. They are always stubborn and a badass character who never does no wrong and is always in the right and somehow knows exactly what is going to happen but still messes up so the plot can continue as it originally does.

They are also, obviously, the fifth ninja who also possesses a golden weapon of their own, which is usually the most useless thing to ever exist. During the Season 2: Legacy of the Green Ninja, they are in most cases turned to the bad side because their power is unbeatable but it is then somehow beatable because the plot obviously has to move on. Not to mention, they are the only ninja who can use their elemental powers without the golden weapons because they are just that good.

I can guarantee that if anyone goes to Wattpad right now and tries to find a longer Ninjago book with the character insert, they would find at least few books who resemble this exact description. Why? Because the idea of a character, other than Garmadon, who is an elemental master of darkness and destruction is a great plot and idea for the character in Ninjago realm, but none of them actually think outside the box when it comes to actually executing it.

For example, when they write the character to be the fifth ninja and the fifth protector of the fifth golden weapon and the prophesied green savior, why don’t they write about the fact that the element of darkness and destruction is the toughest for Lloyd to master because he refuses to become like his father and because the element itself takes a toll on the mind of the one who possesses it?

Or why don’t they write about the fact that the reason the Ninjago realm is not perfect is because the First Spinjitzu Master used the element of destruction to create something, only for it to come back to bite him in the ass?

Why don’t they give the character the arc of trying to master their elemental power after Lloyd gives each of the ninja a piece of his golden power in Season 3: Rebooted, only for them to go down the wrong path?

Why don’t they write about the inner conflict the child of Lord Garmadon who inherited his elemental powers would have when they see that what others call a gift, in their case it is called a curse? Why don’t they expand on the feelings of envy the child would feel towards Lloyd for being praised and cherished for his destiny while they are looked down on for their own?

There is so many different possibilities to that plot device and yet I have yet to see someone do it properly.

I apologize if this offends anyone but it has been bugging me for three years now and I had to write it down somewhere where I could hear different opinions about it. I am not trying to shame anyone on their work or anything, if that is what you want to write, go for it, I am a nobody with no life who is still hung up on a kids show that aired back in 2011.

Enjoy what you want, love what you want, and take this how you want. Luv ya!

[toastingpencils37]

The fact that when his friends heard this they probably interpreted it in the metaphorical this will be our last battle and they fighting will all be over after we defeat him kind of way rather than the this will by my last battle by your side kind of way.

[juanaa-ii]

I don’t know if there are any fics on this but it would’ve been so funny if the plot point wasn’t that Mike isn’t a lawyer but that he isn’t from Harvard.

Nothing major changes except for like the prison arc (and a few other misunderstandings). I’m pretty sure the timeline checks out—if a little wonky. Mike is brilliant enough that I’m sure he got a lot of scholarship offers.

He picks Harvard like he originally did and gets banned because he sold tests to the Dean’s daughter (like he originally did) the only difference is that he went to a different school (still Ivy league because of Mike’s big brain) like Yale or Cornell. In fact, I bet he did go to Yale and he absolutely hates Harvard douchebags (even though Yale has douchebags—NOT THE POINT)

Anyways. The secret wouldn’t be big. In fact it’d be comical. Mike still works to put in the effort to fit in with the rest of the Harvard associates, he still goes about his cases as he usually does, he’s just not from Harvard. Jessica doesn’t react with the whole ‘this is gonna get me fired’ it’s more of ‘why the hell did you hire outside of our motto?’ And Rachel isn’t all ‘you should quit’ it’s more of ‘I can’t believe you kept this from me’ but also, later on, very relieved (when she’s accepted into Columbia).

The best part is that some would think he’s a fraud. Like Louis. I think the writers could have used Louis ‘figuring out Mike is a fraud’ plot as like a comical thing that lasts episodes (like it did in the show) only for him to find out that Mike is just from Yale and it would be a anticlimactic reveal but Louis takes it personally and he’s all ‘I cant believe you damaged our integrity’ or whatever.

But yeah. Mike’s legit. He’s just not for Harvard. So no, he still doesn’t know where Harvard students get their pizza but at least he knows where Yale students get drunk. And that whole plot of that girl he dated who broke up with him after he lied about being a lawyer? I think if I tweaked it, he’d be like ‘I’m a big shot lawyer’ and she finds out he’s not or that he’s still a student.

He’d have a part time job at the legal clinic he worked at with Oliver and Nate. And that’d be why the girl breaks up with him, because he lied about how much of a big shot he was but at least he wasn’t a fraud. Actually working at a legal clinic works perfectly because it’d be the job he takes instead of a bike messenger.

Even better, there would be scenes of Mike accidentally running into his old Yale classmates in front of or near the Harvard associates or someone like Rachel, Jessica, Louis, and Mike is just absolutely panicking about it.

[llannasvsp]

IM ACTUALLY WHEEZING THIS IS SO HILAROUS

guys if you haven't, you NEED to subscribe to brent miller's youtube channel there are so many gems like this on there

also im absolutely convinced that vincent is just kai irl