#Yes he looks manic bc he IS manic

[starlooove]

Truly hate tiktok tim stans

[jrueships]

yes. often. i think diggs Every day of My Life (/neg) (/unfortunate) (/nonpos)

i-

[theother-victoria]

Mr reca word vomit bc the brain worms won’t leave my brain!!! I promise I’m Very Sane abt this man

TAGS: not proofread, written before his release so potentially ooc and I’m too lazy to rewrite it post-release, secret relationship trope, reader wears lipstick, making out eheheheheh, reader is smaller/shorter than him, this is my propaganda and sign for u to become a reca kisser too

TAGLIST: @akutasoda, @https-sourlimes, @tragedy-of-commons, @mitsvriii (putting you on the reca kisser agenda >:3), @harque, @hazyue, @gabile18, @khoncore, @moineauz

Ok so imagine being in a secret relationship with the man himself…

Like the two of you HATE each other’s guts in public. As a rival film producer, the public loves to pit your films against each other, and the two of you as well apparently. There have been so many instances of you making small digs and sly remarks toward each other during interviews that it’s become somewhat expected by now. You have a gripe with the pacing of his films and his fame. He has a bone to pick with your cinematography.

“That manic director’s most recent film? I would give my thoughts, but unfortunately I fell asleep not even halfway through.”

“That uninspired, dreadfully dull and artistically lacking director? All their films look the same. I couldn’t differentiate them even if I wanted to.”

No matter how critically acclaimed your work is, he always has something to say about it.

Even if it was in the back of an alley with his hands gripping your hips tightly and teeth nipping at your neck.

"It took until a quarter of the way through the movie before- hah- your cinematography finally showed some signs of thought put into the shots. I know you can do better than this. So why- mmph- did it take you so long?"

You angrily nip on his bottom lip. A flash of satisfaction runs through you when you hear him hiss and taste blood on the tip of your tongue.

“Like you’re one to talk with the horrendous pacing of your newest film! Tell me, what was the plot of it again? Because I- mmm!?- already forgot the direction it was supposed to be taking twenty minutes in!”

"Well, you just simply lack reading comprehension. Not my fault, of course.”

“Oh, you little piece of-!”

He shuts you up with a rough and messy kiss. Your legs immediately go jelly and were it not for his leg slotted between yours and pushing you up against the wall, you think you would’ve collapsed right there and then.

When he pulls away, your lips are glossy and swollen. There’s a dazed look in your eyes that makes him smirk in satisfaction and without any hesitation, he pulls out his camera to take a few shots.

“Yes, yes, wonderful! That expression really suits you!”

Anger looks good on you, but he much rather prefers this expression.

He leans in for another kiss and because you can’t say no to him, you indulge him- until you hear footsteps nearby. You hurriedly clamp your hand over his mouth and wait until they’re gone before glaring at him.

“Stop running your mouth so much in public! You’ll give us away at this point!”

“Then stop being so loud,” he hisses back, though he’s in no better state than you, his-already-disheveled hair an absolute mess now from you gripping it. His flushed face is littered with lipstick marks and you can’t resist the temptation to add a few more.

“Cheeky, aren’t you?” he huffs out as you place a lingering kiss to the corner of his mouth. A soft kiss to his eyelid makes his eyes flutter shut and an affectionate sigh escape him. He smells of the chemicals used to develop film and strong coffee…

Then there’s a gasp and the undeniable sound of a camera shutter going off. Caught red handed.

You pull apart from him with a surprised gasp and expression. Strangely, he doesn’t look fazed at all. Still as smug as ever.

You whirl around to see an equally-shocked photographer standing there. Paparazzi, from the looks of it. He was probably going around and looking for some potential shots before accidentally stumbling upon something that would make front-page headlines. When you look back at him, then at the photographer, there’s even more people now snapping away at the two of you in a compromising position.

With the damage already done, you try to leave before he stops you. His jacket resting on your shoulders dwarfs your smaller frame and he yanks on the film strip belt to reel you back in. The crowd of photographers has doubled now, murmuring excitedly to themselves.

“Wh- let go! The paparazzi are having a field day-!”

He silences you with a swift kiss and a pinch to the inner thigh. The cameras flash even more rapidly now.

“Let them see for all I care.”

enjoyed this? my taglist is open!

@ theother-victoria, do not copy, repost, modify, translate, or feed to ai

[norrizzandpia]

hey 🧡 could you please do one with lando where you two just have that very special connection. you’re dating for years already and just became each others home / safe place and everyone around you can see? x

The words of this request are so cute like i love it

Also i ended up merging this with the ski trip 🤭 and a proposal bc what other way to best depict two people being incredibly in love than a proposal?? 😍 (i just want to marry Lando Norris)

Ski Trips and Smiles (LN4)

Summary: Lando and Y/n had been planning this ski trip with their friends for months, so she knows everything on the itinerary. Well, at least, she thinks she does.

Warnings: language, yn falling into snow, yn not being able to snowboard, max being a weepy baby

Note: the one time im in a marriage mood bc i watched the bachelorette

Lando’s hand shook slightly as it rested in his pocket, clutching the black suede box that he had quadruple-checked was with him before they left the house. He didn’t know what he was doing, crazed and manic in love with the woman beside him. She was asleep, head on his shoulder as the plane moved along, quiet and tranquil because of its privacy.

Max sat across from him, eyeing his best friend as droplets of sweat began to form at the top of his head.

“You okay?” He whispered, gaze shifting to the girl beside Lando, the girl who had been in their lives for six years.

Lando nodded, albeit hesitantly, “Yeah, fine.”

Max’s eyebrows furrowed together, “Really? Because the sweat stains on your shirt say otherwise. It’s like sixty degrees in here, mate.”

The Brit’s eyes shifted to catch his shirt, the material soaked through around his chest and armpits. His eyes widened, “Oh shit. Fuck. How do I fix this? She’ll know something’s up.”

Max shook his head with a teasing smile on his face, “Don’t say anything, but I figured this would happen. I packed some quadrant shirts from the new line in my backpack for you. I can get one right now if you want?”

Lando breathed a sigh of relief, “Max, holy shit, thank you. Thank you. But, no. I’ll wait a few hours. Until it gets closer to her waking up. I don’t want to sweat through the new ones too.”

Max hummed in agreement, letting silence take the moment once more.

However, the boy felt sympathy for Lando, the nervousness that was clearly wracking his body at the impending ask, so he tried to reassure him, “Lando, you have got to chill, mate. It’s going to be fine. She’s going to say yes.”

Lando’s frantic eyes bounced around, “But, what if she doesn’t? What if I’ve built this all up in my head and she actually doesn’t want to marry me. I’d rather be her boyfriend for the rest of my life than take a chance and ask her to be my wife and have her leave me.”

Max chuckled, “Sometimes, I wish you could see yourself in other people’s eyes. You’d take one look at yourself right now and immediately talk about how outrageous and ridiculous you sound. You two have been together for six years, Lando. Six years. Let that sink in. Six birthdays, six Christmases, a multitude of times she’s been there for you, 130 Grand Prix, an overwhelming amount of time spent building you back up after racing took you down. She’s been a constant. You know that, Lando. You’ve lived through it. This is just making all that permanent.”

Lando moved his head to stare at her sleeping face, her closed eyes and slowly rising chest making his heart fill with a specific kind of love he had only ever felt for her, and smiled softly, “Maybe you’re right.”

“Of course, I am.” Max gave, laughing airily.

Lando’s hand came to cradle her head, nudging it toward his mouth so he could plant his lips in her hair, whispering, “Maybe you’ll be right.”

—

Her laughing could be heard in the distance as Lando continued to ski toward her. Her head was face planted in the snow, hands messily placed beside her with her foot shoved in the snow, and, even with all the cold she was most likely feeling, the contagious sound filtered through the air and imprinted itself under Lando’s skin. Whether he got chills from the cool temperatures or the sound of her, he didn’t know. He would like to think it was her, though.

Lando rounded around her body, coming to a complete stop with snow spraying behind him as he fell to the ground.

“Y/n! Are you hurt?” His hands, covered in gloves, gently moved her body to sit up, a smile still gracing her face after the accident.

Her cheeks were flushed as she looked up at him with a mischievous grin and Lando was sure his heart stopped beating. Her beauty was a kind that was subtle, not truly reaching its full potential until she was laughing or smiling and only then blowing you away with such vigor, it took the air from your lungs. Sparkles in her eyes and soft features, Lando always felt a soft kind of feeling burst within him whenever she blessed him with her gaze. He remembered the first time he caught her sight. She had been a vision in a red dress at the gala his dad had forced him to go to. He remembered watching her as she floated across the floor, wondering how someone who looked his age could act with such elegance, and being completely enamored with the woman she already was at 18. He was obsessed, unwilling to look away, and when she looked back, he learned what it was like to be truly awestruck. Suddenly, she had grown shy under their staring and, when he approached her, the two of them had been a bundle of stuttering nerves. Lando later learned that the change in her demeanor was because of her already knowing his name at that point, already having a crush on him. He found it cute then and he still did now as she looked at him with the same light eyes she did that night. The same gaze she shot him every night, everyday, and every moment since they got together those six years before.

“No,” She shook her head at him, waving her hand in his face as she tried to get back on her feet. When she plopped back down, he laughed at her, apologizing quickly after when she looked at him like a lost puppy. He stood up before her, looming over her sprawled out body before bending his knees and reaching out for her arms. His strong, large hands clutched her biceps as he hoisted her off the ground, pulling her into him and successfully getting her to a stand.

Their skis clanged together at their feet, but the noise didn’t interrupt him from leaning down and pecking her cold lips. He smiled under her reciprocated kisses, blushing over her affection and providing some sense of warmth for their smashed-together faces. They stayed kissing each other sweetly off to the side of the run, wrapped in the other’s arms and completely removed from the world around them. That was typically how it was for them, alone in their own world and completely enthralled with the other.

Six years and that had never changed.

And Lando hoped that wouldn’t change for the rest of their lives.

“Oil! Stop fucking on the ski run!” Max screamed as he passed them, goggles on as he zoomed past. Lando moved his head to the side, giving his girlfriend a perfect view of his stellar jawline.

He yelled back, still tangled in her arms, “Shut up! Thank you!”

Y/n giggled at the two best friends, still surprised at some points by their antics.

He returned to her, head tilted down to lovingly gaze upon her, “How about we finish this run and then we can go back to the lodge? Maybe get a drink or two?”

His eyebrows wobbled, she knew what he meant, and she was quick to hit his chest, “Lando! We are with your friends. They are literally staying in the same room with us.”

He scoffed, “There’s a door! It’s like Max’s and I’s old apartment. We used to fuck in my room all the time.”

She rolled her eyes, “That was different.”

“Why?”

He hardened his gaze at her, challenging the argument she was clearly losing. He smiled triumphantly when she huffed his arms and wiggled out of his hold, “Fine! If you make it down to the end before me, we can go at it!”

His jaw fell open as she began to ski away, giggles ensuing and a sound that echoed in his ear even after she was out of hearing range. When he became unvexed by the sounds he adored to a concerning level, he pushed off and began racing down the hill.

When he passed her, he just smiled knowingly at her and thought of the things they would get up to that night.

—

The rooftop of the hotel was filled with bustling adults, glasses clanking together as people joined in boisterous conversation. Lando’s arm around her waist and his whispers in her ear, Y/n felt the love surrounding her that evening.

With their close friends sitting beside them at the dinner table and Lando’s hand on her thigh, she looked around to find everything she could ever possibly need for the rest of her life.

That must’ve translated in her eyes because Lando was leaning down to murmur, “You okay, love? You seem dazed.”

She smiled at him, his heart stopping unsurprisingly, and murmured back, “Yeah, I’m okay. I’m just really happy to be here.”

He pulled back, a large grin on his face, before he began to stand up, “Let’s make you a bit happier then, yeah?”

She was confused by his words, but couldn’t question it as he began dinging his knife against his glass, quieting the conversations around the table and bringing his friends attention to him.

She stared up at him as he began speaking, “I just have a few things to say and then we can all go back to getting drunk.” He laughed, agreeing noises being thrown out by their friends, “First, I would just like to thank all of you for just setting your busy schedules aside to be here for a little commencement trip of the winter break. This season has been one of fun, especially with the fact that Y/n was able to make it to every race,” He looked down at her, grinning softly before he caught Max’s knowing eyes, “I cherish that, love. Anyways, so, thank you for that. The second thing is something I’ve been wanting to do for way too long, but never gained the courage. Oh, thank you to everyone for helping me plan what I’m about to do. I should probably say that before I actually do it.”

Y/n sat up in her chair, looking around to see everyone nodding at him as if they understood what he was saying. She looked to Pietra, the girl already looking at her and sent her a questioning face. Pietra just shook her head with a smile as she pulled out her phone and pointed it at the couple. Y/n’s head tilted, lost in confusion and not listening to what Lando was saying before he nudged her lovingly and forced her to look at him.

“Y/n, you’ll probably want to pay attention to this next part.” He chuckled, but she saw the way his forehead creased. He was nervous. She couldn’t understand why he was nervous.

He sat back down his chair beside her, turning his body so he could fully face her and grabbing her hands to hold in his. His piercing green eyes caught hers and didn’t let her go, “Y/n, we’ve been together for six years. Six years that you’ve helped me to find who I am as a person. Six years as you’ve made me realize the man I want to be, especially to you. Six years that you’ve spent putting up with me and all the stressful things I get us into. But, most importantly, six years you’ve spent loving me. When I first saw you at that gala, I was so incredibly struck by you. Not just by your appearance, you’re very beautiful, baby, don’t get me wrong, but there’s so much more to you that meets the eye and I knew that that night. I was struck by the way you held yourself, how strong you are and how kind you are to everyone around you. You’re consistently showing me the kind of human being I want to be and every day I try to live my life by making decisions you would. You’ve been a guidance for me and I can’t thank you enough for that, especially when I was struggling in my beginning years of F1. It’s not something I can say to you every day, but I hope you know how much you’ve improved my life since you’ve been in it. Ask anyone here, I’ve never laughed more, smiled more, or felt as happy as I do when I’m with you. You’ve brought such brightness into my life and I want you to know it’s because you are a light. To everyone here might I add. A light. That’s what pushed me to ask you out, to continue to fight for you, for us because the kind of joy you’ve given me just by being yourself has completely flipped my world upside down. That’s what pushes me to do what I’m about to do next.”

Y/n’s hands shook in his as she watched Lando move his chair and get down on one knee before her. By now, tears were streaming down her face at the realization of what was to come. By now, the entirety of the rooftop had turned to see the spectacle.

Lando Norris getting engaged.

He looked up at her, something he didn’t get to do often, and removed one of his hands to pull the box from his pocket. When he opened it, Y/n cried harder, taking his head in her hands and kissing him harshly.

He laughed at her, kissing her back before mumbling, “Baby, baby, let me get through it?”

She chuckled through the wetness coating her face and nodded, “Please,”

He moved the ring higher, presenting it to her as if it was the most important thing. She wondered when he would realize he was the most important thing.

“I don’t want to know anyone else. I don’t want to love anyone else. I don’t want to share my life with anyone else, but you, Y/n. I want it to be you. Only you. For the rest of my life. Forever and ever and ever, be my wife?” He said through a smile and choked voice, glistening appearing in his eyes as he stared up at his love.

She sobbed, screaming, “YES, LAN! YES! OH MY GOD, YES! YES!”

She lurched forward, wrapping her arms around his neck and nuzzling into the skin there. His hands gripped her body as they cried into each other, whispering soft words of adoration and love.

“I love you so much.” He said, squeezing her tightly as the restaurant erupted into applause and whoops of cheer.

“I love you too, Lan,” She said back, three words that would never have to go unsaid for the rest of their days.

When they pulled back and Lando slid the ring onto the designated finger, they turned to their table. What they found were weeping faces and large smiles as everyone clapped at the success of their plan.

Max blew his nose at the head of the table, Lando and Y/n laughing at him as Pietra rubbed his back.

“You okay down there?” Lando said with a smile as he watched his best friend.

Max stood from his chair and ran over to the newly engaged couple, shouting words of happiness, “I’m just so happy for you guys! Six years, I’ve been waiting for this! And Lando, you were so nervous and I’m just so happy it worked out. Congratulations! I didn’t expect to get this emotional. I’m just so happy that you’ve found someone to love you even with how horrifically annoying you are!” He rambled, hugging them tightly and continuing to blot at his face.

Lando pulled back, “‘Horrifically annoying’?”

Max nodded, “Yes, and look at her! She loves you for you! I’m so proud of you guys!” He wept again, not addressing the way Lando scrunched his nose up at the insult.

Max pulled them into a hug once more, stuffing his face between the two as Lando and Y/n were left to jokingly comfort him. From over his shoulder, Lando whispered to his fiancée, “Am I really horrifically annoying?”

She shook her head, “Horrifically? No. Annoying, though? Mmm, maybe.” She giggled and smiled at him.

That smile, stopping his heart, made her calling him annoying hurt less. That smile was his everything. That girl was his everything.

Oh, Lando was so gone for her and the ring on her finger just told him he could continue to get lost in her.

For the rest of their lives.

[lubilli]

𝗸𝗻𝘆 𝗵𝗰𝘀 ➠ "cutie!"

synopsis: the hashira men when you call them cute/a cutie

ft. rengoku, giyu, sanemi, obanai, muichiro, tengen

warnings: they're all softies here 💔

r. kyojuro

• he was training while you were watching

• "you're doing so well, kyojuro!"

• he was all blushy cuz u complimented him

• he's used to compliments but it just felt different when you did it

• maybe bc you never really compliment anyone

• and maybe bc he has a praise kink

• "awww, kyojuro, you're such a cutie!" you squealed when you saw the pink dusted all over his cheeks

• his brain almost short circuited

• not even joking

• he's been complimented on his looks before.

• he's been called handsome, good looking, but...cutie? that was a new one

• "kyojuro? are you okay?"

• "yes, y/n! i am completely fine!"

• he said that while his cheeks literally looked like tomatoes

t. giyu

• you just got back from a mission looking half dead

• when giyu saw you, his face literally looked like this -> 😨

• how tf did you even manage to hurt yourself this bad..

• he DEMANDS to patch up ur wounds

• that brings you to your current situation, sitting on giyu's bed while he tends to the wounds

• you winced when he got to a certain cut on your thigh, he glares at you

• "you wouldn't be in this situation if you weren't so reckless, y/n." he scolds you

• you just laugh, "you're cute, giyu."

• it takes him a while before he realizes what you said.

• "did you call me..cute?" he furrows his brows

• "yes..because you are cute."

• continues tending to your wound even though he's literally dying inside

s. sanemi

• he's so aggressive its so hard to find him in a vulnerable state

• ur literally the first hashira to see him all calm

• when he's not screaming and yelling, he's actually really cute

• he loves cooking for you

• he's doing that rn

• "is it good?" he asks

• "it's a little salty..."

• "why can't i ever get this recipe right?!"

• he's so frustrated

• he's tried to cook this one recipe 5 times now but there's always a little too much of a certain ingredient

• you chuckle at his reaction & ruffle his hair

• "you're really cute, y'know?"

• wtf did u just say

• did u just call him cute...

• "WHAT'D YOU JUST CALL ME?!"

• those manic eyes found their way back onto his face

• he's yelling at you but you can see the pink dusted all over his cheeks

• you started calling him cute more often

• acts like he hates it but he literally loves it sm

i. obanai

• you started getting close to him recently

• you found out he actually really likes poetry

• you'll just be sitting under/on a tree and he'll be reading his lil poetry books while you're just dreaming

• you think its so cute when he shows you lil poems he really likes

• "this one reminds me of you" he points to a poem on a page

• you shift your attention from the clouds to his book

• it reads, "A faint clap of thunder,

Even if rain comes or not,

I will stay here,

Together with you."

• bro.

• you died

• why is he so cute sometimes

• scratch that, he's always cute bro

• you smiled so big, "you're really cute, obanai."

• you moved a strand of his long hair and tucked his behind his ears, seeing his beautiful heterochromatic eyes.

• he looked at you with so much love bro

• "cute?" he tilted his head

• "yes, so cute."

• he's a mess but he just nods and continues his reading

• although he literally can't focus bc ur now the only thing on his mind

t. muichiro

• you don't know how you even got close to him

• but he will NOT go cloud-watching without you now

• takes you to his favorite spot

• he just talks abt the clouds while you mess around with his hair

• sometimes braiding it, sometimes doing pigtails or ponytails

• "woah," he stares into the sky with awe

• "what happened?" you ask

• "that cloud looks like a turtle." he pointed

• you looked at it and it really did look like a turtle

• "oh and look, that one looks like a heart." he pointed somewhere else

• wtf hes so cute

• "so cute," you squish his cheeks

• he looks at you dumbfounded

• takes him 4-5 business days to process what you just said

• when he realizes his cheeks flushed pink

• he's literally never felt this before

• wtf type of witchcraft did u put on him

• you tilt your head, "what's wrong, muichiro?"

• "i don't know, but my cheeks and ears feel really warm."

• you laugh, "you really are cute, muichiro." you ruffle his hair.

u. tengen

• you and tengen are close friends

• his estate is like your second house

• started getting close to u bc ur flashy in his eyes

• then he got sent on a few missions with you and your bond grew even more

• anyways you were in tengen's estate rn

• "tengen," you frown

• "hm?"

• "my stomach hurts."

• he frowns, "should i get you a heating pad? do you want water? medicine? chocolate? massage?"

• you smile, "its fine. no need."

• "yes need. i'm not gonna let you endure your pain, y/n. that's very unflashy." he crosses his arms

• "you're such a cutie, tengen."

• he lifts a brow, "cutie? yes, i suppose being a cutie is very flashy." he nods. "now, tell me what you want—heating pad, chocolate, medicine, water, or massage?"

• "you're so stubborn." you shake your head, "but a chocolate sounds nice."

• "done deal. stay here and i'll get you some."

• he came back w some delicious ass chocolate

• "call me that more often. its very flashy."

• "call you what?"

• "cutie."

• you smile, "your wish is my command." you took a bite of the chocolate.

• he pat your head, "get well soon."

[thatdeadaquarius]

Ok but polygot reader who's like a pro singer who sings im all the languages they know all across teyvat cuz y not <3

Having a duet with yunjin and xinyan

Harmonising with barbara

Singing for nilou's dance

I WANNA SING LULLABIES TO MY CHILDREN SO BADLYYYYYYYY

Orah my beloved genius you <333

LMAO SORRY I JUST HAD TO USE THIS GIF

Orbit: Short Headcanons-ish

Stars: mostly Mond/Liyue characters, mentions of other singers/musicians

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: none known. & Trigger Warnings: none known.

Please comment if I missed any. /gen

☆

U get to sing a solo with Barbara yes!!

but u know whats more important? whos more hype abt ur songs/diff languages???

Venti.

Venti is.

Venti is vibrating with barely contained manic energy

poor guy is sick of always being familiar with songs, nothing is "new" to him, but ur songs?? they're from a different world, and he can't know any of them!!!

Venti's has a surprising amount of strength in those noodle arms bc ur suffocating in his hug rn-

He is constantly begging asking you to sing for him, sing in public, he'll put you on the Barbatos statue hands just so everyone can hear you,

constantly pleading politely requesting if he can lay in your lap under the Windrise tree while you sing slow songs

Hogs you from Barbara, Klee, and anyone else in Mondstadt who would want to personally hear ur singing/duet with you lmao

u had to bring in the cavalry (Rex Lapis/Zhongli) to get a week away from him lol

luckily the retired god was more than motivated to bring u to Liyue, after all he spends a fair amount of his time listening to operas/music

DUETS DUETS DUETS!!

Yunjin blew ur eardrums out of excitement the first time u copied her singing perfectly, kidnapped u for an entire week of festivities where u were the special singer guest <33

Xinyan looked at you like u hung the stars in the sky for both playing a little guitar/singing to her rock music (as she's used to instrumental rock so far bc its been just her)

Qiqi, Klee, Yao yao, Diona all ask (in their own ways lol) for lullabies,

they each wanted you to sing to them every night but it wasn't possible... so u got cloud retainer to invent a machine to record some lullabies you've sung in each of their countries languages so they can sleep 🥺<333

and the dancers.

you cannot escape the dancers.

Nilou, yunjin, eula, gaming, ayaka, doesn't matter, u cannot have peace.

u will sing for them all at some point, u will have repeated performances, u will attract crowds, u will be going on a world tour

(Lyney has also kidnapped u for his magic shows to show off ur singing in French)

☆

finally scheduled a post and am able to rlly get at my asks more frequently now thank goodness

im so ready to open ask box again 😭😭

hope u guys have a fun Tuesday!! :)

Safe Travels 0rah,

💀♒

If you wanna join a taglist, DM me what for! "Pspspsss, please tag me for [All SAGAU posts, Only SAGAU Language AUs, diff fandom, etc.]!"

(If you ever wanna drop, just DM me! "No more taglists/[specifically this AU/fandom] please!")

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks / @devilangel657 / @esthelily / @justinsomniachild / @nanithefuck / @questionotmystopit / @chinuneko

@kiyomi-uchiha777

[thebearer]

i def know carmen will be literally watching your location, like “why’s she at target? could’ve she gotten it here? why is she going down S street?” crazy ass

yes but after you go back home bc his manic technologically challenged ass would not even think of that when you were at sugar and pete’s. he had no clue where you went for a solid twelve hours maybe. he was losing it and fak came on and dropped that bomb. his defense was, “I thought he looked at her location! i’m sorry!”

then when you come back him and he has to go to work, carmen realizes he does in fact have your location (he genuinely forgets that’s a feature) and suddenly it’s his favorite thing. he watches it constantly. constantly. to the point he and sydney have to have a talk about him being on his phone so much. he’s really still a little paranoid that you might leave him. he wouldn’t blame you, he’d definitely deserve it, but it would ruin him.

[arkhamslvts]

I've been seeing X-Men 97 and ummm... that old man looks kinda well-preserved. I feel like if you made a joke about having to go slow so he wouldn't have a heart attack, Erik/magneto would wait until y'all were alone and fuck you so fast that your your vision starts blurring from how fast your body gets thrown around while he's doing it, but the he'd be like- “Oh we have to be mindful of my health, you wouldnt want to tax my frail old body too much, right, sweetheart?” and slow down to a slow-ass snails pace when you're close. Like you've gotta keep begging that old man to fuck you properly and he's like- “but don't you care about my health? 🥺 You would want to give this poor old man a heart attack right?🥺” and he keeps alternating pace to keep you away from your orgasm and then when you're finally crying, he'll speed up and force like, 3 out of you, back to back.

giggling manically bc this is my first magneto ask and im so in love with that old man...

but yes im sorry he's such a dickhead. "c'mon dove.. im lookin out for my heart, what're you gonna do if im gone?" and everytime he speeds up he chuckles, but he won't say anything because he likes listening to you fall apart under him and and and

[luffyvace]

Hello, could I request Feitan with a reader who looks innocent and angelic usually but is actually just as sick and sadistic as he is? (Aka it's like a secondary persona kind of)

And she's also part of an organization(that kills people) without him knowing (she was part of it even before meeting him)

Ouuuu an interesting reader we have here~

Seeing as though all the feitan gifs are generic fighting ones I’ve put my own picture :) I think it’s hilarious 😂

enjoy your headcanons lovely anon! 💗

(fem! reader implied bc you used ‘she’ in your request but I won’t imply female body just in case)

Feitan getting with an angelic and innocent s/o is certainly an oxymoron

Your such a sweetheart, so thoughtful and kind

you always try to help and encourage others as much as you can

:)

But in reality no?? really your such a sick and twisted sadist who loves watching every moment of others suffering???

welp that went down the drain quickly

feitan might have picked up on the fact that it was all an act or your slightly sadistic tendencies

especially since he’s highly observant

Though I’m not sure how you revealed your in a organization or if you knew he was in the troupe but it probably went like

”your in a criminal organization? Oh…me too” 🧍‍♀️

“Wait what?” 🧍‍♀️

“so we’re both in criminal organizations of the sort?”

🧍‍♀️ 🧍‍♀️

well I guess its all out in the open now

as soon as he figures out your a sadist tho

its on

torture sessions become even more frequent seeing as though he now has someone to enjoy it with

he finds it rather fun to have someone laugh manically with him and not call him a loony 🤓

he’s grateful even

the victims really range from anyone off the street

to enemies from either of your organizations

maybe even someone who gave you a hard time

(they simply bumped into you, you apologized like the “sweet” person you are, but they had no idea what was coming for em that night)

(for fei, they probably mocked him)

you and feitan either have a dedicated torture room or have turned you basement/attic into one

and it definitely has a lock on it

feitan will recommend you some books and you likely do the same for him

(by some i mean you have a whole library shelf—who are you fooling 🤨)

you two make as much time for each other as you can

which yes torturing together counts as quality time

and y’all see it as a sense of normalcy too

wherever y’all stay you just be like

”hey wanna have a quick torture session then find something to eat for dinner?”

like it’s like going about normal daily activities for you two

it also feels good to have someone that gets you from the outside

like your both dangerous criminals,

that likely grew up in harsh conditions

(bc i mean come on mass murders have triggers/motivs they don’t just do things for no reason)

and now you have someone from outside your organization that gets you!

like, they even like torturing just like you!!

best s/o feitan could wish for

as time goes on you two would find out why you joined the organizations you did and if you genuinely enjoy it, just doing it for the money, etc

no matter the reasons or time, you accept each other :)

this also appeals more trustworthy to feitan!! Since your in one yourself, you can’t sell out feitan without selling out yourself!

😋

but…that could go downhill..

for example, your organization could be trying to target feitan/the troupe and is making you use him to get to them

As time goes on he shakes away the thought, it’s probably been years (when feitan’s down, he’s down for the count, he doesn’t do flings, in my hcs) since you’ve been together so he wants to trust you

basically the further things go in with you two, the more he trusts you

of course you have to make sure to give him reasons to trust you and don’t give him any reason not to

he’ll start getting suspicious of you even on the first slip up

(if it happens)

he has to protect the spider, there’s no way he can let it fall because of him

orrrr!!!

your organizations could meet! And form a alliance that may or may not be temporary/strictly business!!

it would be fun seeing all members together drinking and wrecking havoc!!

right?!

😊

LOL just imagine your all casually talking about such violent and socially unacceptable crimes 🤪

especially you and feitan

you guys are so silly

just a silly little group of friends :)

planning to commits fiendish acts together<3

honestly I like the last scenario the best

its so silly :P

I’m glad to see more feitan stans on my page!! thank you for requesting, hopefully you enjoyed!

💖

[isa-ghost]

do you have hc's for death duo?? if you just have more q!phil hc's i would enjoy them as well!!

Previous qPhil headcanons

YES HELLO these took me a hot second, I wanted to do Missa justice bc the fandom tends to just reduce him to nice wet cat in love with Phil. Unfortunately he gets on so little, I don't have a lot more than that to run with, so what you see is what you get and they're more Phil-POV'd. 😭

Also these are platonic bc you asked for Deathduo rather than Pissa!

Listen man. Missa's place in Phil's silly polycule? It's not strictly romantic (if at all) and not strictly platonic, it's a secret third thing. I don't hc Phil or Missa as aro but what they've got going on is def smth some aros would enjoy. The best way to explain it is Kiss The Homies. Except there's a massive crush on Missa's end.

Phil loves doing literally everything with Missa. Exploring, egg care, goofing around, whatever. Quality time and gift giving are his love languages no matter the type of love. He just loves hanging out.

Phil can do no wrong in Missa's eyes. He's this amazing (and very pretty), smart, caring and powerful guy. He cares so much about people, how could he possibly do wrong? Missa is the #3 Philza Minecraft defender (he concedes that Chayanne & Lullah are #1 and #2).

Missa doesn't understand the whole Bolas thing but he's happy it seems to make Phil happy. He thinks? (The word he's looking for isn't happy, it's manic /lh)

Being away so often sucks, but Missa loves coming back and getting stories from Phil. ... The good ones, not the [lore] ones. Those scare him.

They love exaggeratedly rping nuclear family to tease Chayanne. Holding each other making kissy noises like OoOoH MiSsA I LoOoOvE yOu! OoOoOh PhiLzA I LoOoOvE yOu tOoOoOo! And then Chayanne starts (lovingly) hitting them

The rare times Phil is doing something that doesn't require him to move around, Missa gets a free lap pillow. Phil's good at playing with hair, Missa knocks right the fuck out

And Missa likes putting little braids n stuff in Phil's hair. Actually he looks damn good with those little side ones tbh.

There's something funny about the Angel of Death and a reaper being so close. When the kids are asleep, they swap stories about Missa's past reaping jobs and Phil's,, adventures

Speaking of Phil's past, Missa hasn't doubted him for a single second about what little of the hardcore gods Phil has shared with him. El Ender King es una pequeña perra. >:(

Actually he REALLY wants a full-on lore dump from Phil. The stories sound so fascinating. He wants to know more.

One of Phil's favorite things about Missa is how easy to startle he is. Missa screeches never get old.

Dependable as ever, Phil is the first one Missa goes to when he's missing information or scared. Phil always has answers and he can always protect him!! (*is heavily implying angst here, no Phil can't :)*)

Usually it happens when Phil is 100% alone but he does genuinely get a lil depressed when he misses Missa badly. He wanders to distract himself

Idk man if I was Missa I'd get a little 😳 seeing Phil spattered in blood after a battle where he obliterated whatever the fuck it is he's up against. Scary crow man being a badass motherfucker and then his bloodied ass's first question is if you're okay?? HOO. Would not blame Missa for acting unwise about it

[inoreuct]

More weretiger Zoro thoughts bc I'm crazy abt it-

Before joining the crew, Zoros had a lot of bad experiences with ppl trying to kidnap/capture him, whether it be for his pelt or to keep as a pet or just to have as a spectacle. When bounty hunters come after the crew one day and somehow manage to cage him, it dredges up some bad memories. He fights the hunters off of course, hes stronger now, and has his friends by his side, but the encounter leaves him shaken. He tries to brush it off as nothing, stays in his tiger form so he has an excuse not to talk to anyone, but the crew can tell hes feeling uneasy, sulking around in the shadows, fur bristling at any loud noises or sudden movements. They hatch a plan, and lure him to the kitchen where its warmest, where theyve built a nest of pillows and blankets for everyone to curl up in together, and surrounded by his crew gently petting his fur Zoro feels a lot safer <3

ooh,,, weretiger zoro lore YES PLEASE 🤭 thank you for the ask anon!!

call it twisted, but zoro is used to running for his life. fighting for it. before everything (before safety, before them), people catching a glimpse of him could only mean three possible things: a leash, a cage, or a skinning knife. years of evading trappers and hunters and rich bastards who thought they could own him (dead or alive, they hadn’t really cared) had honed his survival instincts knife-sharp and taught him how to keep himself out of trouble. he’s ever only been in a cage once, and never again.

but he’s gotten lazy. his crew and the solace of their ship on the open sea— they had lulled him into a false sense of security. he’d let down his guard and now he’s looking out at the deck through metal bars with clammy palms and his throat tight, and it’s chaos.

there are bounty hunters fucking everywhere, like a swarm of roaches trying desperately to gain the upper hand; they had clearly overestimated themselves, based on the way his crew’s wiping the deck with them. a thrill of vindictive satisfaction threads through zoro even as a group of the bastards prod at him with bayonets and swords. that satisfaction only grows when he snaps at them, snarling and baring his fangs, but he can’t hide from the fear that pools underneath.

that, he isn’t quite so used to. fear is not something that roronoa zoro feels on a regular basis; he’d picked up his swords and turned himself into a weapon of a man, half out of necessity and half just for the way people pissed themselves just hearing his name. then it had been bar fights to duels to bigger bounties and then sudden safety, stability, Merry’s gentle rocking under his paws as he prowled the deck and then Sunny, afternoon warmth on his fur as he curled up on the grass to nap.

the roiling in his gut and the tension at the back of his neck is something zoro hasn’t known since he was very, very young, and weak, and alone.

he snarls again when the tip of a sword swipes a hairsbreadth under his chin, cursing himself for losing his focus as he backs up against the other side of the cage, resisting the urge to peek over his shoulder. the ocean rolls gently at his back; he can hear her, but it’s a small comfort. if he tips the entire cage into the water and fails to pick the lock, it would drag him down to a watery grave and he is not ready to die today. nami yells somewhere, her voice followed by a crack of thunder, and zoro bites down a manic laugh as he remembers her trying to teach him to lockpick and him being honestly quite dismal at it— not an option, then.

the cook had fared better at it, nimble fingers and all that. said cook goes flying past with his leg on fire and slams his heel into a bounty hunter’s face with a solid crunch. as zoro takes stock of the deck, everybody else is busy and that realisation doesn’t make him panic a little, it doesn’t. breathe, he reminds himself. they took his swords, but it doesn’t matter. he fights plenty well enough with his fists, not to mention the damage he can do in his other form.

one of the hunters bangs his rifle against the bars and zoro’s heart jumps, a shudder rippling down his spine as the man pspsps’s at him like— like he’s a fucking cat. “who would’ve thought,” he begins, laughing nastily. “roronoa zoro, the elusive green tiger. how’s it feel to be backed into a corner, hm?”

“all those years of stealing our bounties, taking all the money— don’t worry, now,” another sneers. “you’ll make it up to us when we get paid for the fur off your back.”

the disrespect makes him growl, deep in the back of his throat. he wants to rip off their heads. he wants to run away and hide. their cackles are loud and obnoxious, and the closer zoro looks the more he realises that he knows these guys. knows their faces, anyway, and he has those faces categorised in his head as nothing more than riffraff. he wraps his fingers around a bar discreetly by his hip, squeezing tight until he feels his claws extend, and cool metal presses into his back as his breathing comes quicker.

once before. he’d only felt this once before, icy against his too-thin fur, curled up in a trembling ball at the corner as jeers and the banging of metal on metal filled his ears. switching between boy and cub on instinct because he couldn’t control it with his heart pounding hard enough to hurt.

his gaze flicks around unseeing before he finds usopp, loosing rapid-fire shots of something that sends his targets into violent gasping fits, clawing at their throats before going still. the moment they lock eyes, zoro straightens; there’s a question there, a quiet moment of stillness as usopp holds his form, waiting. do you need us to come get you?

zoro steels himself, takes a breath and grits his jaw, and he shakes his head minutely. no.

a small nod, and that stillness shatters. usopp dives out of the way with his hands over his head and a startled yelp as luffy’s fist flies out of nowhere, and zoro sighs through his nose.

“not my fault i was just better than you,” he says, offhand and unbothered, tipping his head back against the bars as he surveys the hunters around him coolly. they react exactly as he expects; loud outrage and yelling and more clanging around, and he feels that urge to curl into a ball and hide shift into something more spiteful. more vicious.

it heats his blood as he notes the lock of the cage and nearly raises an eyebrow, because of course the whole damn thing’s made of reinforced metal except the latch. he’s seen enough of franky’s work to know shoddy workmanship— they skimped on quality because of the cost, probably because they’d planned to be dealing with a mindless beast and not a man. zoro huffs a laugh.

and sure, nami could try all she wanted to teach him how to pick a lock.

sometimes, though?

zoro inspects his space and backs up as much as he can. the cage is small, but it’s enough. he’ll make it work. metal scrapes against the taffrail as the ship rocks beneath their feet.

sometimes, old-fashioned’s just the way to go.

he crouches down, waits for one of franky’s cannon’s to draw the hunters’ collective attention, and pounces.

the door slams open as he rams it with his shoulder, cheap metal snapping like straw as he bursts onto the deck and fuck, the momentary standstill before the panicked scrambling starts feels electric. he shifts in an instant and yawns, prowling around the group of hunters, crowding then back against the cage as his tail lashes like a whip.

they’d just caught him off guard and coerced him into an enclosed area. fools. he melds back into his human form, eyes glowing gold as the wind ruffles his hair. “you should have collared me,” he chuckles, just the slightest bit cocky because please, he’s earned it by now. “maybe a leash. rope, at least. what the fuck made you think just caging a tiger was a good idea?” zoro flashes his fangs, bright white and lethal, and a man whimpers as his grin widens.

his footsteps are silent as he shifts back and stalks towards them. there’s a reason he’s known as the demon of the east, after all, and he thinks it’s due time to give the world a reminder.

*

“so…” usopp begins, fiddling with a short piece of rope. “who’s gonna address the elephant in the room?”

luffy looks around at the bounty hunters sprawled over the deck, all in various states of consciousness. “there was an elephant?”

usopp holds in the urge to sigh and drags a hand down his face. “tiger in the room. whatever.”

their captain tilts his head. “zoro’s not here.”

“exactly!” usopp exclaims, before he checks his surroundings and ducks his head to hiss, “exactly.”

“he’s probably off napping somewhere,” chopper offers, but even that doesn’t sound very sure.

the swordsman had disappeared after he’d shoved the group of mauled bounty hunters into the cage and bashed the lock in to seal it shut before chucking the whole thing into the sea. he’d stayed just long enough to watch it sink and then crept off somewhere— and he still hasn’t reappeared.

“oh— you know what he’s like.” nami rolls her eyes, perched on top of an upside-down crate, arms crossing as sanji squeezes her shoulder. “he’s fine. nothing shakes him.”

“you didn’t see the look on his face,” usopp shoots back, feeling strangely defensive. he knew what zoro was feeling, read it clear as day; he was intimately familiar with the kind of fear where you felt too small and too trapped to do anything.

he knows about zoro’s past. they all do. and the thought of zoro, fearless, larger-than-life zoro, undefeatable zoro, crammed into a tiny cage and getting poked at like a zoo animal? it makes something in usopp rankle so strongly it surprises even himself.

he startles as a gentle hand rests on his back. “i do believe our sniper’s right,” robin hums, leaning into franky’s side. “we should make sure he’s fine, don’t you think?”

there’s a general murmur of assent, and usopp leans back against the taffrail with a feeling that it’s gonna be easier said than done.

*

zoro doesn’t remember ever being this shaken.

he’d just been… numb, when he was a kid. not yet warmed up to the idea, the reality, that he’d be hunted just for what he was. after that numbness faded most of what he’d felt was rage; he’d indulged the instincts to hunt, to sink his sharp edges into muscle and viscera, until luffy had earned his loyalty and then the rest of the crew after him.

now he can’t stop feeling like he’s gonna tremble out of his skin, and he hates it.

it’s been days since the fight. he shouldn’t be affected. shouldn’t have been affected at all. but now without the adrenaline of battle, everything’s coming back crystal clear— the panic that had nearly choked him when the cage door swung shut, the sound of the lock clicking bouncing around his skull like a rubber ball. his own blood rushing loud in his ears, heart thumping a staccato against his ribcage, his eyes searching for someone, anyone, shoved back by the gritted statement that he didn’t need anyone to save him.

he hadn’t. he doesn’t. he shouldn’t.

and yet he hasn’t shifted in days, prowling the shadows of the ship on four legs, head ducked low and ears pressed down as he keeps his belly close to the deck. he tells himself he’s hunting for imaginary mice and jerks at every sudden noise. he’d let his guard down and then he’d payed the price and now it’s driving him mad; every creak and shift of the Sunny has him on edge, fur standing on end, and he hates it.

without his battle instincts, he’d have been stuck in that fucking cage. usopp had snapped him out of it a little— he’d made it out, but barely. the stupid metal box had been so small that if he’d shifted he wouldn’t have been able to move, and even now the thought of it makes him feel like throwing up.

the feeling of being locked up is not one that you can forget. bravado can only get you so far; he’d been a fool to think that being part of luffy’s crew offered him infinite protection, no matter how strong any of them are. he’s supposed to be able to handle himself, and he can. he can.

he hates this.

he’s been wandering aimlessly, strolling around without particular reason. his crew’s been trying to get him out of his funk; franky made him a whole new scratching post. sanji’s been leaving his favourite booze in the crow’s nest. brook had played jolly sea shanties for hours (and admittedly, zoro had felt terrible about just slinking off midway) and jinbei had tried to talk to him, but he gave it up when zoro just gave him a look. he knows they care, and he loves them for it, but he’s oscillating between wanting to go on a rampage and hide in a cupboard. the promise of safety still feels too good to be true after a refresher on what the rest of the world means for him. he knows he’ll have to get back to routine soon and he will, he just—

his ears prick up, and he pauses. listens.

“—arimo!”

he chuffs. it’s nearly midnight; what the hell is the cook calling him for?

“marimo! get your mossy ass in here now!”

and okay, wow. rude much. he wouldn’t put it past sanji (or any of his nakama, for that matter) to try another funky attempt at cheering him up, but on the off-chance that there’s actually something wrong…

he growls low in his chest, half-annoyed, padding around the corner and shouldering the galley door open.

he takes one look and turns around to walk right back out.

there are pillows and blankets piled everywhere on the galley floor, and the oven door’s open. the whole space smells like dark chocolate and cookie dough. zoro can’t do this.

everything after that happens in quick succession: he hears luffy laugh, he thinks oh no, and then he yowls as he’s grabbed and yanked into the midst of the massive pile of bedding. he flashes his teeth in a baseless threat, whipping around to hiss at his captain, but luffy just snickers and pulls back his arms.

he’s disgruntled even as the rest of his crew slot into place around him. it was a trap, and he admits he’s literally fallen right into it as he hears nami whisper, “told you he’d come if you called—” and then the sharp, mildly reproachful click of sanji’s tongue.

the cook turns to him, cross-legged with a pinstriped pillow hugged to his chest. “you don’t have to say anything,” he says plainly, eyes flickering to the side as he fiddles with a corner of the pillowcase. “or do anything, for that matter. just… stay.”

zoro stays quiet and lets himself look around. everybody’s in their pyjamas, smelling like soap and chocolate; franky has a nightcap on. luffy shoves a cookie in his mouth whole, and jinbei pretends that he doesn’t nudge the plate closer for their captain.

zoro doesn’t need them, maybe. but he remembers years of irregular sleep from watching his own back, stuck in his human form, always hyperalert and pushing for the next paycheck.

he’d been miserable before them. he really doesn’t need them— he can survive just fine on his own.

but that’s all it’d be, wouldn’t it? surviving. not living, not really. he doesn’t need them but he wants them.

it’s easier to admit than he expected. nothing changes. it’s no big revelation; just one that he’d been too afraid to acknowledge until now.

the anxious feeling in his stomach has settled some, and soft chatter starts around him as he lays down to rest his chin over his paws. after a while there are fingers in his fur— he allows it. if only just for tonight. let us help, is what he hears as he feels nami’s nails scrape gently between his ears, luffy playing with his tail, the warm wash of lamplight making sanji’s hair gleam dark gold. brook’s laughing quietly in the corner, and he can feel chopper’s chest rise and fall against his side.

sleep comes easily, for once. these people, his family— they make safety a little easier to believe.

[dee-morris]

I Think We Moved on Too Quickly from Coffee Theory

Yeah yeah I know. But hear me out.

When I watched the season two finale the first time, I felt blindsided by it. From a narrative perspective it made sense, bc Neil Gaiman said that he needed to set up the situation that would make season three possible and okay yeah, that probably meant putting Crowley and Aziraphale in weird and different places. I got that. But from a character perspective it felt like a huge reversal from Aziraphale's behavior throughout season two, and of course that led me to look for outside factors that could have caused it.

After talking about it with Internet friends, reading lots of metas, thinking and discussing and watching the season over again, I decided that it wasn't necessary to believe that Aziraphale had been drugged. Most of what he said and did could be explained by careful study and analysis. Once you realize that Metabitch's presence in the bookshop is a veiled threat, everything else falls into place.

Nevertheless.

I definitely DO NOT Believe that Aziraphale was brainwashed or mind controlled by the coffee. His behavior during the Final Fifteen was frenetic, desperate, little bit manic. Definitely not the behavior of a mindless zombie. But nevertheless.

I still think that there was too much emphasis on the coffee for it to be a simple prop. Is it a literal macguffin or a symbolic one, that I'm not sure. I could see it either way. It might be just a symbol of the Sophie's Choice that Aziraphale had been presented with, or... There might have actually been something in the coffee.

The show makes a point of telling us that celestials can be affected by human poison. Almonds are symbolic in the Bible, and cyanide smells like almonds. Again, Aziraphale's behavior at the breakup scene was not that of a brainwashed person, but what if the Metatron TRIED something like that and it didn't completely work?

Aziraphale didn't want to follow the Metatron until after he drank the coffee. And even then he turned and looked at Crowley, and he didn't move until Crowley told him to go ahead. (Cue the Breaking Bad Walter Screaming in the Car meme) What if whatever the Metatron tried on Aziraphale only kind of worked? Just enough to make Aziraphale a bit dizzy and suggestible, but being close to Crowley mitigated the worst of it. That's why Metatrash needed to separate them.

Aziraphale is very clever, and if he knew he'd been drugged he would also know better than to let on that it hadn't worked completely. Cue the weird off-key phrases that are ALMOST in character but still pretty damn weird. "Heaven is the side of goodness, of light" my dude has NEVER said anything like that. He's said that about God, yes, but he's always held a distinction between God and heaven. Or "you're the bad guys" that's just WEIRD, that's a weird thing for him to say, and I will die on this hill. Even during their worst fights Aziraphale has made distinctions been himself and Crowley in terms of their job descriptions, but he's never made a moral judgement like that before, nor has he ever lumped Crowley in with the rest of hell. "They're the bad guys," now that would have made sense, and if it were anyone but Neil Gaiman running this shit I would think that it was a simple scripting error. But Neil doesn't make mistakes like that.

So Aziraphale plays along and tried desperately to communicate with Crowley that something IS VERY WRONG but our favorite disaster demon picks NOW to get in his feelings and ignore the clear and present danger standing outside the bookshop and staring at them. I'm pretty sure "I forgive you" is Aziraphalese for ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??

Again, I don't need my version of Coffee Theory to be real to understand what happened in the Final Fifteen, but it's just an interesting little toy to roll around in my head. There's so much emphasis on that coffee in the show and even in the episode synopsis, I still think there's something about it that we haven't been told.

[lueurjun]

hufflepuff boyfriend heeseung

feeling really inspired these days idk why, hence why the frequent posts. i might do a written scenario on this too. also lmk if you want more hogwarts enhypen. this is also really long so i’m very sorry about that but i’m running on no sleep it’s 5 am and i’m tired so pls if it’s bad cut me some slack aasdhfkfkdl enjoy

idc what anyone says lee heeseung screams hufflepuff to me

maybe bc i’m a hufflepuff and i want that man in my house

let me have my moment

for the sake of this you guys are also in hufflepuff because this was an impulsive burst of motivation I DONT HAVE A LOT TO WORK WITH RIGHT NOW PLS LET ME LIVE

change it in your mind if you’d like

anyways we’re going for the you fell first, he fell harder trope

i mean who wouldn’t fall at the mere sight of him?

you began harbouring a little crush on him during third year

specifically during potions class when he took the fall for you against snape after you messed up the shrinking potion

he wasn’t even mad. he just gave you a small smile and told you ( gently) to be more careful

you never messed up ever again because if lee heeseung tells you to be careful YOU BE CAREFUL

anyways yes from then on you’re all heart eyes for him any interaction leaves you a bumbling mess

he once sat down next to you in the great hall and you damn near drowned yourself in pumpkin juice

he didn’t reciprocate your crush until fifth year

he’s a lil slow but hey! we got there in the end

his crush specifically started after he got sick and had to spend some time in the hospital wing and you went to great lengths to get past madam pomfrey JUST to give him your notes

you’re an adorable little magic try hard for him like who would go to great lengths like you? no one heeseung should put a ring on it rn

or else i will

jkjk

unless…

ANYWAYS

you’re very good at hiding your crush ( for the most part other than the fact that you freeze whenever he’s around ) but you’re not completely hopeless

heeseung, on the other hand, is absolutely hopeless

anytime you’re in the vicinity this boy becomes a blushing mess

literally heart eyes for you

you notice that he’s acting different and at first it scares you because suddenly he seems distant

and you start panicking

so you go to sunghoon

bad idea

“is heeseung mad at me?”

“yes. he hates you.”

“WHAT?!”

cue jake stepping in with a wild look of panic on his face

“HE DOESN’T HATE YOU!! SUNGHOON WHAT ARE YOU DOING THIS IS OUR DEAR FRIENDS SOULMATE!!! WHY ARE YOU CAUSING TROUBLE?”

sunghoon just sips his pumpkin juice and goes: “funny”

it wasn’t funny you almost cried

little baby hogwarts student riki who follows them around found it hilarious tho

“HA GOOD ONE HYUNG”

jake is like a stressed out father

“riki nishimura eat your toast!”

and you’re just confused because you heard jake call you heeseung’s soulmate in a moment of stress

heeseung is blissfully unaware of the turmoil at the dinner table when he strolls into the great hall

though he goes paler than nearly headless nick when he sees you, his precious little soulmate, surrounded by the group of demon spawns he calls his friends

he manages to go even paler when you stand up and march towards him with a look of determination

and he’s taken by surprise when you yank his tie and drag him out of the great hall prompting many hoots and whistles from your friends

poor heeseung just wanted some breakfast

you pull him into a quiet corner and he’s absolutely petrified

“do you hate me?”

you surprise yourself with how blunt you are

it takes a moment for the question to register in heeseung’s mind and when it does…he starts?? laughing

like manically

him? hate you? that’s the funniest joke he’s ever been told

then he catches onto your ‘wtf’ look and realizes that you’re serious

mortified. sickened. DEVASTATED at the fact that you think he hates you

“no-no! oh my god! no no. i don’t hate you? HATE YOU? ME? Goodness no! I’m sorry I made you feel that way-it’s just…you make me nervous and you’re really good looking and i think-no i KNOW! I KNOW i’m in love with you. please don’t hate me”

honestly you aren’t sure what you was expecting but it definitely wasn’t that

you’re at a loss of words because holy shit

lee heeseung likes- no! no he said loves! he loves you

there’s no words that come out

instead you dry heave and heeseung nearly sobs at the fact that he made you almost throw up with his confession

and that makes him dry heave

so there you both are in the corridor continuously heaving

jake, sunghoon and riki are peeking around the corner watching the whole exchange

one looks perplexed, and the other two look absolutely delighted

“bet you five galleons heeseung throws up first”

“you’re on”

“you are not betting on our friends failure! and riki stop gambling you’re like six”

anyways back to the shit show which is confession land

both of you manage to keep down the contents inside your stomach much to the dismay of sunghoon and riki

“i wasn’t- i got nervous!” you try to explain

“it’s completely fine! i wasn’t meant to confess like that and i already knew you weren’t like-into me—“

sunghoon has had enough

bro pops out from around the corner

“they’ve liked you since before merlin was even cruising around! just date already and spare me of this torture!”

everyone say thank you to sunghoon because after his help, the two of you start dating

finally! this took longer than i anticipated-i got carried away very sorry! okay continue

THE RELATIONSHIP YAY EVERYONE APPLAUD

the professors definitely shipped it and had bets on you both

snape owed mcgonagall twenty galleons

even dumbledore was in on it

holding hands under the table is an absolute must

heeseung does this thing when he senses you getting a bit stressed out in class where he’ll rub his thumb over the back of your hand

finding you both curled up together in the common room is a regular occurrence

you’re both devastatingly awkward but in the cutest way

that’s also really painful to watch sometimes

cue your friend group watching you get all blushy and flustered after shamelessly flirting with each other

“someone break them up before i avada kedavra myself here and now”

dragging heeseung by the tie is a common occurrence

and he has a thing for walking behind you gripping the sides of your shirt or robes

you’re both terribly protective of each other

if anyone hurts heeseung’s feelings, oh boy! not even voldemort would be able to stop you

“did they just insult you, hee? i think they did. HEY YOU! SAY THAT TO HIM AGAIN AND WATCH HOW FAST I RIP EVERY HAIR OUT OF YOUR SCALP, YOU TOAD!”

and if anyone upsets you? oh boy.

he literally shaved someone’s eyebrows off for making you cry. man knows no consequence when it comes to protecting his partner

you both get really shy about pda

so that means whenever you want to share a peck, one of you will hold up a book to hide your faces

making out in the restricted section is a must

the two of you start sneaking off and it becomes noticeable to your friends

“where are they?”

“probably swallowing each others tongues”

when they finally investigate they find out that the two of you have been sneaking off to read muggle stories to each other in the abandoned bathroom

even moaning myrtle cringes at how in love the two of you are

the two of you are really happy

and everyone else is happy that you’re happy

“dibs on naming the future child!”

“sunghoon you are absolutely never naming our baby”

“why not? sunghoon jr lee has a nice ring to it”

you manage to compromise and agree to let sunghoon be the best man at your wedding

he did get the two of you together

perhaps the two of you should repay the favour and find him a match?

[wayfayrr]

Gonna ask this RIGHT this time lets GOOO

I’m a bit of a nut when it comes to pyromaniac and explosion obsessed characters, just going absolutely manic with numerous explosions going off around them type of stuff

Can I maybe ask for a reader like that with Time? Just an absolutely tired man who loves seeing them happy, but by god please put the gunpowder down for five minutes

Thank you, and once again bc you deserve it, congratulations :>

thank you again for all the congratulations 🥹💖💖 I swear everyone on here is so sweet. 💖 for this one I hope you don't mind I went with a calmer moment for that type of reader where they're sitting by the fire making explosives relaxing, I hope you like it!!!🔥✨✨

“[name], what are you making over there? Please don’t tell me it’s more explosives…”

“Look you don’t have to mutter under your breath like that.”

“You didn’t answer my question [name].”

“I thought you didn’t want me to tell you.”

The old man seems to be looking his age for once, granted I'm one of the main reasons he's been pushed to his limits like this. Really though, it's in my nature I can't just hold myself back. He should know this with how clear it is that I'm not the most civil when things like this are involved.

"Please stop making explosives from your own world, at least use normal bombs."

"'Normal bombs' don't have the same effect though Time... Look it's not like I'm making the dangerous ones."

Maybe I should stop doing stuff like this, it seems Time really is more stressed than he ever was before I arrived. The chain are taking care of me here, I shouldn't be adding to their stress, well time’s stress more than anything. It’s hard not to feel at least a little guilty about acting like this when he sounds so exhausted. Planting himself down next to me with a sigh, it really feels like I’m about to be given a lecture about my personal safety. It takes a moment to remove my current project away from the heat and to make sure that it’s stable, meaning I can leave it unattended for a while. Better to be over-cautious than the reason Hyrule needs to tire himself out or drain their already low supplies. Nothing would make me feel worse than that after a lecture.

“Just be careful dear, I love you more than anything so I don’t want to lose you.”

“You’re not going to lecture me?”

“No, I love seeing how happy you are. Even if I wish I was the one making you happy rather than the explosives.”

That was unexpected? I swear if Wild was the one in my place he’d have been trapped here for hours while Time went on about his safety, but for me just a simple admission and a blush? Time’s blushing!? Because of me?? How long will it take him to realise how I’m looking at him like he’s both amazing and acting utterly unlike the Time I know? Barely a second it seems.

“Don’t let me sitting here distract you [name].”

“RIGHT. Yes alright. Um… would you like me to show you some really cool things you can do with fire? There are some safer things in my world that are beautiful.”

“Do you have it recorded on your ‘phone’?”

Rolling my eyes at him with a genuine laugh while reaching for a couple of containers within my bag, he seems a bit scared of what I’m about to pull out of my bag. Like he’s expecting another outburst like the first fight I got into, It's a good thing Hyrule can treat burns. 

“They’re different metal oxides, they change the colours of the fire. And no I’m not going to set the forest alight again not at the moment anyway.”

“[name] I love you but please.”

“...Fine. I promise I won't set the forest alight at all. Now can I show you what these do?”

I didn’t even let him answer this time, preferring to just toss some of the copper chloride powder into the fire waiting for his response to the apple-green flames. He looks stunning with how they reflect off of his armour, and how they highlight his face. Which colours would light him up the most beautifully I wonder, red, green, pink, cutting the colours completely and having him silhouetted by an explosion perhaps? 

“Do you keep things related to all of this on you at all times?”

“Why would you ever assume otherwise?”

“Please hold back from burning entire woods from now on.”

“...I’ll try.”

[autisticlancemcclain]

fic rec friday 46

hello and welcome to fic rec friday! where, on friday, i rec five of my favourite fics.

habits of my heart by tusslee

Keith swallowed nervously, afraid to ask what it was Lance wanted, but his mouth was ahead of his brain, “What do you want then?” “You. All the time. In every sense. It’s insane.” Lance said with a laugh that sounded a little manic. “I want to hold your hand and shit. I want to just be near you, like some love-sick girl, but I think that’s what I am. I think I fucking love you, holy shit.”

no bc i need yall to understand how batshit insane i went when reading this specific piece of dialgue in-story the first time. im pretty sure i actually gasped out loud. the easy immediate and pained you oh i did not recover for a long ass time

2. falling by tusslee

Lance was also not entirely the idiot everyone thought him to be. Oblivious in some aspects, yes. Naïve to an extent, also yes. But Lance knew a little bit of the psychology behind dreams and how they were basically your subconscious projecting your fears, or whatever. Okay so he didn’t know the exact details, but he knew enough to piece together why his fear of falling was quickly becoming the main focus of his dreams night after night. And of course like everything else that went wrong in Lance’s life, it was Keith’s fault.

I LOVE ME SOME GAY METAPHORS ‼️‼️‼️ like i wonder why you are afraid of falling lance!! and i wonder what is going to soothe that fear!! hm!!! what mystery!!! what intrigue!! HM!!!!!!!!!!!!!

3. curing space blues by tusslee

The weightlessness of zero gravity doesn’t apply to feelings, Lance learns.

i'll read homesick lance and awkward but determined to help keith a thousand times in a thousand different ways idc. it never ever gets old. bc it's just so true that is what happened is it not. this is them

4. wherever you will go by tusslee

“I want to be someone you count on and come to when you’re upset. I want to be important to you, Lance, because you’re really important to me.” Silence stretched between them when Keith lost the nerve to continue. He kept his eyes on their hands, noticed the color contrast between them and wondered if it’d look so profound if it was more than just their fingers twined together.

first of all. lance calling keith red and keith calling lance pretty. send tweet. second of all. choked up by his own difficulty expressing emotions but so deeply loving that he tries anyway keith makes me actually sob with my real tears every single time. without fail. keith i love you keith you are so everything keith you do all that you do with everything you have to give

5. Guy That I'd Kinda be Into by spirkylurkey

Lotor thinks Lance is cute. So does Keith. They're all in a floating space-castle together. This is going to be a problem. i miss the good old days!! when messy dumb comedic gay love triangles were abundant!! they were so much fun!! and so for you i present a messy dumb comedic gay love triangle. i also miss the animatic that used to exist with the song from the title. old voltron you were a mess and a half and i miss you truly

that’s it for today!! i’ll see y’all back next friday for the next fic rec post!!!

[verfound]

FIC: "Of (Not) Telling the Parents" (MLB; Lukanette; LBSC Lukanette Month 2024)

@lovebugs-and-snakecharmers is doing a Lukanette Month for September 2024, and we all just kinda tossed some prompts in the disco to compile a list?  We ended up with 71 prompts, so I decided I’d roll some dice to pick a prompt, do a twenty minute (ish, bc we all know sometimes they run away from me) sprint, and try to get some short fics out this month?

Direct continuation of Of Lost Luggage, Shirts, and Other Things. Quick & Rierse know what they did. 😂🖤

Read on Ao3

Prompt 63: Stage Fright

Luka wasn’t used to having this problem.

He was a professional rock star.

Like…still starting out on his solo career, sure – he had a handful of EPs under his belt, and he was working on his first full-length album.  He had opened for Jagged friggin’ Stone – had played in Jay’s own band! – before sold out arenas across the globe.  He’d been on TV – he’d been on Saturday Night Live!

And every time he took the stage it was…effortless.  Making music had always felt like breathing to him.  Playing was second nature.  There was nowhere that felt more like home than behind his guitar.

…well.

Maybe one place.

Marinette’s arms were starting to feel more and more like home with every passing day.

…which was probably what had led to the current problem.

Standing outside her parents’ bakery.

Marinette tucked against his side, her arms wrapped securely around his middle.

And scared absolutely shitless to go inside.

“…I can’t do this,” he said, shaking his head.  “We should come back tomorrow.  Darning, I am not rested enough for this.  I am not caffeinated enough for this.”

“Well, that’s why we’re here, isn’t it?” she giggled, looking up at him.  “Breakfast.  Decent coffee.  Exciting news.”

“We can come back tomorrow,” he insisted, squeezing her hand.  “Or the day after.  Technically, there is no news yet.”

“Bullshit,” she said, tugging him down for a kiss.  “There’s news.”

“I haven’t technically asked yet,” he insisted.

“There is news, Luka Llewellyn Couffaine,” she huffed, kissing him again.  “You aren’t taking this one back.”

“I can’t take back something I didn’t –” he tried again, but she just pulled him into another kiss that…honestly?  Left him a little dizzy.  It probably wasn’t safe for public display, either – even in Paris.  Especially in front of –

“SABINE!!!!  SHE SAID YES!!!!”

…shiiiiiiiiit!

The next thing Luka knew, Marinette’s mouth had been jerked away from his own as Tom hoisted them both up in a bear hug.  The world started spinning around him, and he groaned as he ducked his face against Tom’s shoulder in an attempt to calm his flipping stomach.  That probably wasn’t the best idea, because Tom was still whooping and hollering and was entirely too exuberant for the way his head was pounding.

“I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!” Tom whooped.  “See, Luka?  What did I tell you, son?  There was no possible way she’d ever say no – she’d be crazy to!”

He clapped a hand on his back, and Luka hadn’t even realized he’d put them back down until his knees buckled under him and he went tilting towards Marinette.

“Luka!” she cried, rushing forward to catch him.  He groaned as he slumped against her, and she laughed breathlessly – maybe a bit manically – as she rubbed his back.  “He’s had a long couple of days – maybe…go easy on him?”

“Isn’t that what I should be telling you, mon choux?” Tom asked with a wink that had Marinette shrieking at him as her face lit up with a fiery blush.  “Oh, relax – I’m not that ignorant to what young people in love get up to!  Especially young people in love who are about to be married!”  He leaned in even closer, and Luka wasn’t looking but he was pretty sure Tom winked at them.  Winking would be a very Tom thing to do, especially when he followed it up with: “Besides, where else are my grandbabies supposed to come from?”

“…kill me now,” Luka groaned, his voice just low enough that he hoped only Marinette heard him.  She smiled and patted his back, and he almost smiled when she kissed his shoulder.

Until Tom laughed, grabbed his other shoulder, and pulled him back into a half-hug.

“Now, now, Luka, none of that,” he chided gently.  “This is good!  We need to celebrate!  Have you two thought about any details yet?  Themes, colors, your cake, a date…?”

“Tom, please,” Sabine chided as she followed a customer out the door.  She waved goodbye to the woman, who was giving her a knowing smile, and turned back to her husband.  “He just got in today – within the last hour, from the looks of it.  Let the poor boy find his footing first.”

“Oh, pah – he’s fine!” Tom said, shaking him.  He turned to Marinette with a grin.  “Well, mon choux?  Let’s see it!  I’ve been waiting years for this!”

“Papa…” Marinette sighed.  Luka looked up just in time to notice Sabine’s eyes had looked to Marinette’s obviously, painfully bare fingers.

“Marinette, sweetheart?” she asked.  Marinette looked up, her eyes widening when she saw Sabine’s pointed look.  “Is…there something you maybe don’t need to tell us?”

“What?  No,” Marinette said, quickly tucking her hands into her pockets.  “We’re engaged.”

“We are not,” Luka groaned, dropping his face in his hands.  “We can’t be engaged until I ask you, and I’m not asking you until…just tell them, darning.  This day can’t get any worse.”

“Luka, stop it right now,” she huffed.  She stepped over to him and pulled him into a hug, thwacking the back of his head before bringing it down to her shoulder.  “Dummy.  I don’t want to wait for a stupid ring – yes, you dummy, it is just a stupid ring,” she bit when he tried to argue, because it wasn’t.  It was her nonna’s ring that she’d been in love with since she was a little girl, and using it as her engagement ring was supposed to be this big, stupid, romantic gesture that she was going to love, and he’d gone and lost the damn thing like the damn idiot he was.  Why would she want to marry him after he lost her nonna’s ring?  “I want to be engaged to you now.  I want to be married to you now.  Stop making such a big deal out of this – it’s just the jetlag talking.”

“It is not,” he insisted, but then he shook his head and pulled away, blinking at her.  “…you still want to marry me?”

“Yes, you idiot,” she laughed.  “That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you since the airport!”

“But I lost the ring,” he insisted.

“You what?!” Tom yelped, and he winced as he glanced back at him.  He leaned closer to Marinette, whispering probably not quiet enough as he kept his eyes on her father.

“…don’t tell Tom,” he said.  “Marinette.  He’s going to kill me.”

“Oh, son, I’m not…” Tom sighed, his expression crumpling, but Marinette was already turning Luka’s face back towards her for another kiss.

“You didn’t lose the ring, Luka,” she said.  “The airline did.  You just…made a rookie mistake.”  She looked around him as he slumped against her, smiling sadly at her parents.  “He left it in his suitcase.  And the airline put it on the wrong plane – we’ll have it back in a few days.  He’s just…it’s been a rough couple days, and he’s too tired to be sensible about it.  Or to accept that I’m saying yes with or without a stupid ring.”

“He was really excited about…” Tom started, but he shook his head and chuckled.  “It’s all right, son.  These things happen.  Next time you’ll know to keep the important stuff in your carryon.”

“Ask him about the time he lost his lucky rolling pin sometime, dear,” Sabine said, reaching over to rub a hand along his back.  “It took us a month to get it back, all because he was afraid security would consider him a terrorist.  He was inconsolable.”

“All right, all right – don’t get me started on questionable packing choices, sweetheart,” Tom said, smiling fondly at his wife, “or I’ll tell them how your brother got us hung up in security for three hours for smuggling contraband into the country.”

“Oh, he’s already done that,” Marinette teased.  If he was more awake, he would probably beg her to not spill his secrets like that.  Especially the embarrassing ones.  Especially to her parents he needed them to keep liking him…  “He loves his Lucky Charms.”

And he might have laughed, if he didn’t feel like they were all ganging up on him.

“Why do I feel like I’m losing here?” he asked, sighing as he pressed his forehead against her neck.  She was too comfortable – he was going to fall asleep where he was standing, if he wasn’t careful.

“You’re not losing,” she said softly, her fingers running through his hair.  “You get to marry me.  How is that losing?”

“…I can’t marry you yet, though,” he sighed.  “Stupid Crusher.  Stupid Fang.  Stupid airline.  Stupid me.”

“I should get him home,” she sighed.  “I thought coffee might help, but I think sleep will work better.”

“Of course, dear,” Sabine said, leaning in to kiss her cheek.  “Get him home.  We’ll celebrate later – because we are celebrating, yes?”

“Yes,” Marinette said, nodding firmly.  “It wasn’t how he wanted to…ok, fine, technically he didn’t ask, but you can’t tell someone you have a ring waiting for them and then…yes, we’re celebrating.”

Tom laughed and scooped them all up in one last hug, and Luka groaned as he lost his balance again.  It was all right, though: Marinette was still holding him, and Tom was holding all of them, and Tom would never drop them on their asses like that.  He was pretty cool like that.

“Of course we are,” Tom said, and Luka groaned as he ruffled his hair a bit too enthusiastically.  “You two are getting married!”

Luka glanced up at Marinette as those words sunk in, and a stupid smile filled his face as he saw the grin on hers.

Suddenly, he wasn’t so afraid anymore.  They were going to get married.

And that…that was pretty damn cool.