#Yellow Bird Movie Review

[fantastica-daily]

Yellow Bird Movie Review

Yellow Bird is a deadpan, talky comedy in the vein of television shows like The Office, or Superstore. It’s about a rag-tag crew of grocery store employees who subsist in a small town where everybody knows the business of everyone else (and no one keeps it to themselves).

The story is mainly about Jake Rush (Angus Benfield), a once happily married, once successful, public relations man who has now lost both of those assets and is trying to maintain his dwindling bank account and his tenuous sobriety. Jake is living out of his car, working as a stock boy at the Yellow Bird, and subject to the humiliation of being supervised by his snarky college-age boss, Scotty (Michael Maclane). Making matters worse are his mom, Rachel (Kathy Garver), who’s struggling with senility, and Jake’s entitled ex, Ellie (Ena O’Rourke), who wants to take him for everything he has in the divorce. But basically, all Jake has is his beater car and a smart-aleck garden gnome (voiced by Brian Doyle-Murray).

But fate twists when Jake is unexpectedly promoted to the store manager position, making Scotty his underling. Will Jake take this moment to turn his life around, or will be use it to get even with those who kicked him when he was down? Therein lies the comedy.

The locations help to bring some believability to the movie—a real grocery story was used for the main location, and when we get glimpses into some of the characters’ homes, they look “small town” thanks to on-target set decoration (and costume design, especially a funny scene involving Jake dressing to impress in one of his deceased dad’s old suits).

When all is said and done, Yellow Bird is an indie with heart. While the acting levels are somewhat uneven, the main characters are all cast quite well; Benfield, who also directed this film, has that well-worn, put-upon has-been character down-pat, and O’Rourke is excellent as his oft-married, high-maintenance, soon-to-be-ex. The comedy and drama are done with a light touch and are mostly amusing, but the movie would have been much more fun with a shorter run-time—Yellow Bird did not need to clock in at an hour, forty minutes.

If you enjoy hometown vibes and dialogue-driven comedies involving everyday people, Yellow Bird is worth the watch. It's now available via VOD.

= = =

S.L. Wilson

[jupiterswasphouse]

WASP REVIEW - PARASITICA (TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES 2012)

[Image ID: A screenshot from the 'Parasitica' episode of TMNT 2012, of the parasitic wasp, which is the focus of the episode, mid-flight /End ID.]

Now, for a change of pace, let's have a look at something that isn't from a video game for the first time in this review series! It tends to be harder to find wasps in TV in particular that are notable enough to properly review, which makes it all the more fortunate that I got this suggestion, as this mutant species of wasp is the entire focus of the episode!

Now, I've never been a TMNT enjoyer, I just didn't get into the franchise as a kid and have yet to look into it on a wider scale, however, I did enjoy this enjoy this episode. That's not to say it's without its inaccuracies, though, so let's get into it, starting with the wasp's general appearance!

Looking at it them, they have the shape and eyes of wasps of the family Vespidae, fairly standard fare for wasps in media, likely based on some black and yellow species of paper wasps, or otherwise yellowjackets. The latter would makes sense, given what appears to be an abundance of setae around the mesosoma especially, reminiscent of a fair number of yellowjackets, although of course the glowing lines across the wings, meso- and metasoma, and eyes aren't accurate, but they aren't meant to be. I have to say, props to the modeling crew for making a fairly detailed model with an appropriate amount of wings and legs.

[Image Source: Wikimedia Commons | Image IDs: Two screenshots of the episode, showing one wasp standing and three wasps flying above the Ninja Turtles respectively, followed by a real photo of a common wasp, a type of Yellowjacket, also known as Vespula vulgaris /End IDs.]

They're also notably large, roughly the size of a medium breed of dog, having grown significantly from their mutation. Funnily enough, just before the first appearance of the original wasp, after being asked by Michaelangelo how big the arthropods in a set of photos are Donatello makes a statement I feel the need to comment on, that being "Well, a bee is about four millimeters, and a wasp would be six", which is an odd statement. For one, which species does he mean in particular, he gives an oddly specific measurement when the wall displays images of multiple different types of wasp, including fairyflies (or Mymarids), which can be as small as 0.127 millimeters (Dicopomorpha echmepterygis), and Vespids which can reach up to 45 millimeters (Vespa mandarinia). The western honey bee (Apis mellifera), the most likely candidate for the bee that Donatello is referring to given how common and well loved the species is, itself is 10 millimeters at minimum among the average worker.

[Image ID: Another screenshot, showing the wall in question, which has 4 different papers pinned to it with multiple different species of wasp /End IDs.]

But anyway, with that side-tangent out of the way, let's get into the behavior of the wasps, starting with the first things we see. When the initial wasp appears, we hear vocalizations from it, which isn't necessarily unheard of, although these noises aren't quite the same as the vocalizations of some other types of animals, such as mammals or birds, as these aren't produced through complex vocal cords and structures, but they are created by vibrations in the wasp's body by stridulatory organs or other muscular structures. These are called stridulations, you may have heard of them in cicadas and Orthopterans, but they can also be observed in mud collecting and digging wasps such as potter wasps and Sphecids, as well as velvet ants, and sounds like a charming little squeak! The vocalizations in the wasps in this episode sound like processed sounds produced by birds like corvids or vultures, reminiscent of sounds associated with prehistoric dinosaurs in movies.

After this, we see the wasp start hunting the turtles. One could make the argument that the wasp is simy protecting its egg rather than hunting, but the events of this episode make it very clear that the wasp is hunting the turtles. While there are many social wasps that may forage for carrion or pieces of your barbeque dinner in order to feed their larvae, the specific targeting of a vertebrate species is highly unusual for a parasitic wasp, as they tend to only target other arthropods like their fellow insects or spiders. But it's likely that this particular behavior was onset by its implied genetic modification by Kraang, known enemy of the Ninja Turtles.

After a short chase around the room, the wasp stings Leonardo in the arm and promptly falls to the ground, dying immediately. This is most reminiscent of the worker honey bees, which have a barbed stinger that cannot be removed from a thick-skinned animal such as a mammal, thus taking parts of the abdomen and internal organs with it (including the still-pumping venom gland), killing the bee within minutes. It's a bit longer than the near instantaneous death we see in this wasp, but it is rather quick! The wasp in this episode appears to have a similarly barbed stinger, although it has only one barb, rather than the row of barbs honey bees have, being shaped almost like a fish hook. Other wasps, including parasitic wasps, have smooth stingers, and thus, can sting multiple times. Notably, worker honey bees are infertile females, as opposed to the stinging parasitic wasps, which are, of course, fertile, the stinger being a modified ovipositor in all wasps that have them (including bees and ants), only being found in females.

[Image Source: PBS, Rose-Lynn Fisher | Image IDs: A screenshot of Donatello holding the stinger of the mutated wasp, and an extremely close up, colorless photo of a worker honey bee stinger /End IDs.]

We know that this wasp is a female due to its possession of a stinger, as well as being fertile due to the egg we see just a moment later. The sting does not kill, nor paralyze Leonardo, despite the size of the wasp, instead having a different, immediate effect in that Leonardo becomes extremely protective of the egg. Over the course of the episode we see that Leonardo appears, in a way, brainwashed to protect the egg, the eventual intention being that the egg would hatch safely and he would be consumed by the young wasp inside.

Shockingly, this does have parallels in the real world, first, and in possibly the more well known example, a form of direct brain change is induced by the emerald cockroach wasp (Ampulex compressa). It first delivers a sting to a thoracic ganglion of a cockroach, causing temporary paralysis in the forelegs, allowing the wasp to deliver a second sting to the head ganglia, inducing a zombie-like state, inhibiting its escape response and allowing the wasp to lead the roach by its antennae back to the wasp's burrow, where it lays an egg upon the roach, allowing its larvae to feed.

[Image Source: iNaturalist, ravinaidu | Image ID: A photo of an emerald cockroach wasp leading a 'zombified' cockroach back to its burrow across dirt and rocks /End IDs.]

However, there's another genus of wasps that I believe is the one they took inspiration from here, that being Glyptapanteles, a genus of Braconid wasps that deposit their eggs directly into Lepidopteran hosts, specifically caterpillars. The eggs hatch, and the larvae of the wasps feed on the caterpillar's bodily fluids from the inside, specifically avoiding the vital organs as the caterpillar appears to continue to behave and grow normally despite the parasite inside them. Then, they emerge and pupate, spinning a silk cocoon for themselves, at which point the caterpillar stops moving much or feeding. It only moves then to add its own silk to the pile of pupal cocoons, and, should it be disturbed, thrash around in order to protect the pupae, serving as a bodyguard until it eventually starves to death.

[Image Sources: Wikimedia Commons, José Lino-Neto, and ResearchGate | Image IDs: A photo of a brown Geometrid moth caterpillar looking over Glyptapanteles wasp papae, followed by an image containing several photos of a brown and black Glyptapanteles wasp adult /End IDs.]

There are a few differences, however, evident in the fact that the egg has already been oviposited externally a considerable amount of time before even having a host. This is, of course, understandable given the fact that, if they were to make it more accurate, then this episode would look less like a PG iteration of zombie media and more like an Alien film.

Speaking of the zombie media comparisons, while the change in behavior is down to a direct sting to the brain in the case of emerald cockroach wasps or a chemical concoction in the case of Glyptapanteles wasps, it's described in the episode as being a virus. This virus takes hold and darkens Leonardo's eyes, his mouth producing a viscous fluid, which is eventually spread to all of the other turtles via bite, until Michaelangelo creates an antidote by Donatello's instructions. Obviously, this part is not true of real parasitic wasps.

While Donatello and Michaelangelo are researching the wasp, looking at an article describing its non-mutated equivalent, several photos are shown, and it's here we start to see a couple more inconsistencies and inaccuracies. For one, Donatello refers to a single species as "The Parasitic Wasp", but in reality, there are estimated to be hundreds of thousands of different parasitic wasps, none specifically referred to as being the parasitic wasp. Secondly, at the start of the article, we see an adult of the species, which appears to resemble some form of black and yellow ichneumon wasp, much different from what we've seen thus far.

[Image Source: BugGuide.net, James Reben | Image IDs: A screenshot showing the image of the supposed species, followed by a photo of a real black and yellow species of ichneumon wasp /End IDs.]

After this, we see images of the species emerging from the egg, coming out as a full-fledged, winged adult, more like the wasps we've seen thus far, oddly skipping the larval and pupal stage entirely. This is especially odd considering the fact that adult wasps cannot eat meat, only the larvae, and, as mentioned, the wasps feed on their host after hatc

[Image IDs: Two screenshots of the aforementioned images, showing the wasp emerging and then crawling over its host caterpillar to consume it /End IDs.]

This is later confirmed to be the case in the mutated wasps, which not only emerge from their eggs as adults, but also emerge in a group of three. It is seemingly not unheard if that one single insect egg could produce multiple offspring, but it is exceedingly rare and hard to find information on. In any case, wasp eggs, more often than not, only hatch singular individuals.

[Image ID: A screenshot of the three hatchling wasps above the unconscious Leonardo and Donatello /End IDs.]

As a final note on these wasps, as they go straight for the Ninja Turtles before promptly being taken out by Michaelangelo (with a cannon no less), it seems as though these wasps are all females. It can be inferred from this that this egg was fertilized, as opposed to the males that would come from unfertilized eggs, implying that there was either already more than one of these flying around, or that the female had already mated before becoming mutated, potentially by Mutagen.

All in all, there are many inaccuracies throughout this episode, though I do have to give points for the interesting choice of inspiration! In terms of rating, the episode itself was entertaining and interesting, but it doesn't have much in the way of accuracy to any one specific wasp species.

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Overall: 4 or 5/10

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This wasp review was suggested by @kernelbastard ! Leave your wasp review suggestion in the replies, tags, or askbox!

[androxys]

Androxys Reviews... "I Know What You Did Last Crisis"

Okay, I don’t normally do reviews for these sorts of specials, but I love Halloween so I thought I’d give it a go. I think my two favorite stories were “Dearly Departed” and “God’s Chosen Man,” and my two least favorite were “A Constant State of Healing” and “Crisis Obscura.” I think that as a Halloween special, some of these stories did a better job of playing with the theme–there were a lot of good horror movie homages and trope acknowledgement! And then there were stories that didn’t really engage with that. Full spoilers for "I Know What You Did Last Crisis" below the cut.

Batgirl in “What Kind of Hero?”

Set during Crisis on Infinite Earths #4, featuring Barbara Gordon as Batgirl! As the wall of antimatter progresses, Barbara goes to save a family from Killer Croc. Over the course of the chase, however, it comes out that Croc is lashing out because of his fear, and Barbara comforts him. 

If DC is so deadset on putting Barbara in a Batgirl outfit, I have to admit, this is a good way of doing it. It's Barbara, and it's appropriate. She was a good Batgirl! I just hate how much of the desire to see her as Batgirl comes from a place of wanting to move past or erase Oracle. Seeing the old costume is fun too. I love the blue and grey and yellow. In terms of other contextual calls, Barbara wonders about the sewers being a job for Supergirl, but comments “Linda’s busy,” referencing the fact that 1) this Supergirl is Linda Lee, and 2) they’re friends! If this is set during the events of COIE #4, that means Babs and Linda were talking not too long ago. I think it's a sweet callback to their friendship.

Ultimately, it’s a nice notion to suggest that Batgirl is about not being alone, but I’m not sure that’s what Batgirl is specifically. I wish this story had one more page, but so it goes.

Dr. Light in “A Constant State of Healing”

I’ll confess, I don’t know the Millennium event as well as the other Crises represented here. Mahunters came down, pretended to be humans, etc. I certainly don’t remember them being so gory and… evil.

One of the Manhunters has taken an interest in what’s inside humans, in a spiritual sense, and tries to find it by taking them apart in a literal way. Dr. Light defends STAR Labs by powering through her own pain (and fear of the dark) to defeat the Manhunter. This story is much more interested in the horror motif of the anthology, with the Manhunter being a ripped-from-the-slashers killer taking the skin of his victims. I don’t feel this one required being set during Millennium, but it’s ultimately a decent horror story.

BoP in “Dearly Departed”

The Final Night! The Birds of Prey! This is an era with which I am very familiar, and it is delightful to see Dinah in her mid-90s costume. Black Canary is tracking missing people as Oracle is coordinating things during the Final Night, and she comes across Scarecrow and Silver Banshee. Canary gets doused with some souped up fear gas hallucinates Ollie’s corpse chasing her, begging her for help. She ends up working through her fear and takes down the Banshee, sending her to hell or something. That part wasn’t totally clear.

Okay, I really liked this one. And it’s tooooootally definitely biased. Whereas I didn’t think the previous Dr. Light story had to be set during Millenium (and to an extend, the Batgirl Crisis story didn’t have to be Crisis, but rather any general big threat during Barbara’s career) I think this story takes good advantage of the timing. Ollie had only been dead for 13 real-life months when Final Night first came out, so it’s very recent for Dinah! He’s a reasonable thing for her to hallucinate. It’s not incredibly Halloween-ish, but there is a bit of a horror thread there. Pairing her up against Silver Banshee is a good matchup as two “sonic screamers” but Dinah’s fighting ability and situational awareness are the way she wins. This one was really solid. 

JSA in “At the Point of Vanishing”

This is a JSA story about Zero Hour, so some of us already know where we’re headed. The JSA heads to the Vanishing Point, the place where time ends, to try to help. Extant is there and does what he does, giving his Zero Hour fight with the JSA a Halloween inspired flair. Extant is the monster that can’t be stopped, has the fakeout death, all the tropes of the scary movie monster.

This one is sweet for how it features Sandman’s internal monologue–he’s reflecting on whether the JSA still has a place, or whether they’ve still got what it takes, and they ultimately do! But this one lands somewhere between bottom of the barrel or cream of the crop. This one didn’t do anything for me, I don’t know.

Nightwing in “Crisis Obscura”

Ugh. I saw the author and felt the bad attitude seep into my body instantly. I got way too heated from a single story in an anthology by a man who would kick his heels to know he made a hater mad. Anyway. TL;DR, this story is Dan DiDio being petty, It isn’t even scary for the Halloween theme of the book.

Here’s the gist: Nightwing is tracking someone who doesn’t exist. He sees shards of reality depicting the events of Infinite Crisis. It’s revealed that Superboy–Conner Kent–lured Dick here because Dick was supposed to die during Infinite Crisis, subsequently uniting all the heroes and putting an end to every future Crisis. The problem is, Dick didn’t die. So the universe keeps having Crises to try to kill Dick and set things right. Conner throws Dick into the shards of reality (the ones Superboy-Prime punched) to die an infinite series of deaths and make everything perfect. The story ends with reality having changed–Superboy is now in a relationship with Cassandra Sandsmark again, they’re in domestic bliss, and Batman!Tim has dropped by for a visit. Conner regrets what he did, but ultimately feels it was necessary.

Okay. So. For those who don’t know, Dan DiDio wanted Nightwing to be the one to die during Infinite Crisis instead of Conner Kent. This is him getting his way, two decades later, and I found this whole story incredibly petty. Narratively, how is Superboy moving without Oracle seeing him on any of her monitors? Maybe it’s super speed or vibrating, who knows. How does she not see him tear the warehouse open? Maybe it’s the reality shards, who knows. How does Conner know it was “ordained that [Nightwing’s] death would unite all heroes,” make the Trinity step aside, and end all future Crises? Also, since when does Conner talk like that? And, my big question, DOES DAN DIDIO HONESTLY THINK THAT CONNER KENT WOULD KILL DICK GRAYSON? The answer may surprise you. Meta-narratively, DiDio seems to be relishing in reminding everyone that he wanted to kill Dick and finally gets to do it. Cassie gets to say “None of this is your fault. You were never meant to die.” Conner ends the story by saying that we should all just move on. Neither of these strike me as particularly subtle, but they sure are passive aggressive! 

I take issue with the idea that killing Dick makes a perfect world. It sure wouldn’t be perfect for Bruce! Or Barbara! Or Tim! Or Donna! Or, or, or… the list goes on. If the argument is hinging on the idea that Dick dying makes the Trinity step aside and new heroes step up… that’s not exactly in line with DiDio’s feelings towards legacy characters. That’s why he wanted to kill Dick in the first place. And if Dick dying is necessary to end all future Crises… that’s pre-emptively setting up Dick’s death to be undermined and cheapened when the next Crisis inevitably rolls around. This story, so smug in its meta-commentary, handily ignores that there will always be another Crisis. Those events sell comics! DiDio was a DC exec, so it’s not like this fact is exactly lost on him. Of course, all of this is in the bottle of this single story, so it’s not like it matters, but. God. I hate this story.

And besides. We all know that any world with Batman!Tim is decidedly not a perfect one.

Scarecrow in “Jump Scare”

Okay. My pulse is back down. I’m normal again. I’m back to reviewing. This was a good Scarecrow story! It’s set during Blackest Night, but it’s just about Scarecrow terrorizing a couple who saw a horror movie together. He reflects on the nature of fear (as he is wont to do) and is chosen by a Yellow Lantern ring for his ability to instill great fear.

I don’t think this one ties into Blackest Night all that well, if I’m being honest, but it is a solid Crane story. He’s doing his thing, it follows the formula, bing bang boom. I liked the artistic depiction of showing the guy hallucinating as being in black and white while the rest of the world was still in color–it led from the classic horror movie motif well.

Lex Luthor in “God’s Chosen Man”

Okay. I’m writing this now before I’ve read it: I have high hopes for this one just by looking at the art of the opening page. I want this to be good.

This one is set during Final Crisis, and is reflecting on Lex Luthor’s doubts about Libra as he tries to get the Secret Society to swear allegiance to him and his power. As Lex ruminates, talking with the other villains, a hallucinated Superman follows behind, serving as Lex’s inner voice. Of doubt? Of conscience? As Libra and his masters conquer the earth with Anti-Life, Lex has the realization that Libra serves Darkseid, putting the pieces together that his Superman has been trying to spell out for him. Lex decides that he will be the one to defeat Darkseid, and Superman begins to laugh at him, wearing Lex’s face and mocking him for his arrogance. Lex admits that he needs Superman’s help to defeat Darkseid, and begins to work with Sivanna to plan their betrayal.

Okay, there’s a lot I love here. I love the art. I love that in his mind, Lex is dressed like the Silver Age. I love Lex stating “I don’t believe in gods. But I know plenty about aliens pretending to be divine.” But mostly, I love that this is good character work! It gets into the way Lex thinks, and it plays off his obsession with Superman, his intellect, and the fact that he’s smart enough to reflect on his obsessions with Superman. It provides greater context for what was happening in Final Crisis (which is always appreciated) and sets the stage for his heroic turn against Libra. It’s not especially Halloween-y, so far as these go, but I think it’s good comic work.

Midnighter in “Violent Tendencies”

During Flashpoint, in the world of Flashpoint, Lucas Trent is watching as the Amazonian/Atlantean war continues to devastate the world. Rather than stew on politics, Midnighter goes out to a Halloween party! There, he overhears talk of a serial killer with a victims list including some of DC’s best fighters (at least in the real world) and ignores it. At the party, Pyg roofies Midnighter and takes his home, ostensibly to help him. Of course, it’s Pyg, and he starts trying to kill Trent to turn him into a doll. However, Midnighter reveals he was faking inebriation, having actually been hunting Pyg himself. He kills Pyg, declaring that people can make the world a little better with blood on their hands.

This was a good Halloween spin. It had Midnighter hiding from the knife wielding serial killer, and it even had the classic connection between sex and death that these sorts of slashers trade in. Of course, Midnighter subverts it, but so it goes. I think it’s interesting that they set this during the Flashpoint event–Flashpoint #5 was the first time we saw Midnighter in a main DC comic, having previously been in the Wildstorm universe/Earth-50. I think this is a case of wanting to use Midnighter as a character but not wanting to play off any Crises outside of the New Earth era (1986-2011). Which, this accomplishes, but raises my bigger question… why are all the Crises in this era? I personally, as a fan, am served by this decision. I love New Earth! DC seems to recognize that fans like New Earth, given how much of Rebirth and Infinite Frontier were about bringing some NE stuff back. 

I think it must have been a conscious decision to limit the scope like this–I’m sure there are horror opportunities in events like Convergence or Forever Evil or Dark Crisis. Didn’t we have like one million evil Batmen ripe for horror? Maybe DC thinks we’re too close to these, or burned out (or just burned) from those events. Who’s to say.

[pompadourpink]

Les virelangues

Seize chaises sèchent - Sixteen chairs are drying

Le petit chat chassait les souris qui sont sous les coussins - The little cat chased the mice that are under the cushions

Didon dîna dit-t-on du dos dodu d’un dodu dindon - Dido dined, or so they say, on the plump back of a plump turkey 

Si six scies scient six cyprès, six scies scient six cyprès - If six saws saw six cypresses, six saws saw six cypresses

Choisis 600 chouchous et si ces 600 chouchous sont chouettes, choisis-en 600 autres - Choose 600 scrunchies and if those 600 scrunchies are nice, choose 600 more

Piano, panier, panier, piano - piano, basket, basket, piano

Un pâtissier qui pâtissait chez un tapissier qui tapissait, demanda un jour au tapissier qui tapissait : vaut-il mieux pâtisser chez un tapissier qui tapisse ou tapisser chez un pâtissier qui pâtisse ? - A pastry chef who was baking at an upholsterer who upholstered's once asked the upholsterer who upholstered: Is it better to bake for an upholsterer who upholders or to uphold for a pastry chef who bakes?

Les chaussettes de l'archiduchesse sont-elles sèches ou archisèches ? - Are the archduchess's socks dry or very dry?

Tu t'entêtes à tout tenter, tu t'uses et tu te tues à tant t'entêter - You persist in trying everything, you wear yourself out and kill yourself by being so stubborn

Trois ogres ocre griment trois autres ogres d’encre ocre - Three ochre ogres scratch three other ogres with ochre ink

Trois tristes tigres trônaient dans un arbre qui trônait au milieu d'un trianon - Three sad tigers were seated in a tree that was seated in the middle of a trianon

Ah ! pourquoi Pépita, sans répit, m'épies-tu ? Dans les bois Pépita, pourquoi te tapis-tu ? Tu m'épies sans pitié, c'est piteux de m'épier ! - Ah, why do you spy on me, Pepita, without respite? In the woods, Pepita, why do you lurk? You spy on me without mercy, it's pitiful to spy on me!

Un chasseur sachant chasser sans son chien est un chasseur qui chasse sans chien mais qui chasse quand même - A hunter who knows how to hunt without his dog is a hunter who hunts without a dog but who still hunts

Si vous voulez vous venger, rendez-vous vite - If you want to get revenge, surrender quickly

Douze douches douces - Twelve sweet showers

Je veux et j'exige les joyaux de ces jolis et joyeux oiseaux jasant - I want and demand the gems of these pretty and cheerful chattering birds 

Étant sorti sans parapluie, il m'eût plus plu qu'il plût plus tôt - Having gone out without an umbrella, I would have liked it better if it had rained earlier

Satan montant des cendres s’attend à descendre mon thé. Sentant mon thé, je monte. Satan m’entendant monter, redescend cendres et mon thé, mais Satan s’étend, et cendres et mon thé descendent - Satan rising from the ashes expects to down my tea. Smelling my tea, I go upstairs. Satan hearing me coming upstairs, brings down ashes and my tea, but Satan extends, and ashes and my tea come down

Fait faire à Fabien fourbe et fautif force farces fausses et fantasques - Makes the deceitful and faulty Fabien play many false and fantastic pranks

Le cri du cygne qui crissait dans le cristal des cris d'oiseaux qui crissaient - The cry of the swan that was screeching in the crystal of the cries of birds that were screeching

Seize jacinthes jaunes sèchent dans seize sachets sales - Sixteen yellow hyacinths are drying in sixteen dirty bags

Un généreux déjeuner régénérerait des généraux dégénérés - A generous lunch would regenerate degenerate generals

Le chaton qui chassait le chat qui chassait la souris qui chassait le rat qui mangeait du fromage - The kitten who chased the cat who chased the mouse who chased the rat who ate cheese

Movie: Les demoiselle de Rochefort - Jacques Demy, 1967

Fanmail - masterlist (2016-) - archives - hire me - reviews (2020-) - Drive

[mosviqu]

things/aesthetic you associate with your moots please!

this was in my inbox for over a month i am so sorry anon... anyways. here goes nothing. not doing aesthetics bc thats a lot of effort but here is how i 'see' my friends ig :p

@satoruly - champagne, voice memos, the ocean, the beach, the metamorphosis by franz kafka, tokyo revengers, movie reviews, manga, shopping, indoor plants, sunsets, partying, singing, the bass, i dont do drugs by ariana grande and doja cat, anime, mini skirts, cherries, digital cameras, the color red, shinichiro sano, sand, headphones, random spanish thrown in convo, hearts, gojo satoru, croptops, manga, late night walks in a busy town, izana, gossiping with your best friend, ambition, the feeling of home, endless mutual understanding, passion, freedom, soulmates.

@csenke - monchichi dolls, sylvanian families, minecraft, streamers, the streets of budapest, instagram dumps, sunwoo, afternoon walks, playgrounds, random vlogs u record with your best friends, the colors yellow green and tan, enhypen, mona lisa by dominic fike, random german words, hanging posters in your room, late night conversations, pretty architecture, silly selfies, the excitement of unboxing your packages, changmin, spiderman, chimney cake, Á, lovejoy, candy, loverboy hats, platonic neighbors (yes that exists).

@from-izzy - woodz, bunnies, psychology textbooks, coffee shops, matcha, late night conversations, talking in all caps, excitement, running to catch the bus, making spotify playlists in the middle of the night, protectiveness, the color tan, bicycles, gratefulness, sharing your worries with someone, cloudy skies, the sound of birds chirping outside of your window in the morning, laying in the grass.

@heemingyu - meme reactions, milkshakes, playful banter, inside jokes, playful annoyance at your friends, learning how to drive in an empty parking lot, keyboard smashes, iced tea, sibling-like energy, comfortable hoodies, silent support, instagram reels in your dms as a form of love language, comfort tv shows in your bed.

@sungbeam - admiration, being proud of your friends, watching someone from afar, brainstorming with someone on the same wavelength, literature, baby blue by luke hemmings, dc comics, fic banners, star girl energy, the weird familiarity of a college dorm room, demon changmin, the summer break, doing ordinary things with your music playing lowly in the background, post-it notes on your wall, pancakes for breakfast.

@juyeonszn - cats, supportive comments under instagram posts, lying for fun, feeling yourself when you go clubbing with your best friends, lipgloss, tattoos, roadtrips, concerts, taking polaroids on a night out, flirting with your friends, screaming a song on the top of your lungs.

@zzoguri - valorant, childhood friends vibes, meeting someone and feeling like you've known them for ages, jacob bae, gaming, discord calls, italy, journalism, the friends you meet in university, found family, warm soup on sundays, laufey, day6.

@kimsohn - delusional conversations, talking shit with your honest friends, juyeon, typing really fast on your keyboard, understanding each others typos, editing, yunjin, being in love with women, confidence, yeehaw, iconic energy.

[littlespacereader]

A Little’s Film’s Review🎬🥰

Today Film: Sesame Street Presents: Follow That Bird

As a HUGE fan of Sesame Street I was so excited to see this film! I picked an afternoon to myself, started to regress and popped this on my tv. (Spoiler below!)

Where to watch this: Tubi (free to watch with ads!)

As a huge Sesame Street fan I was excited to see all the colorful and unique characters from Sesame Street in this movie. But some characters had more screen time than others. My favorite characters from Sesame Street are Big Bird, Grover, Oscar and Julia. This film’s main character is Big Bird so he has the most amount of screen time. Oscar plays a huge part in the film as well! Grover, Mr. Snuffleupagus Cookie Monster, Telly, the Count and Bert and Ernie are side characters in the film. But when they are on the screen they provide some hilarious moments. The character I was shocked I didn’t see more was Elmo, who is only seen in a small moment at the end. My other favorite Julia wasn’t introduced yet since this film came out in 1985.

The film has such a sweet message of “Your family doesn’t have to look like you to be your family”. In the film Big Bird is brought away from Sesame Street because he should be living with birds. But he realizes that all his friends at Sesame Street are his true family, despite none of them being birds. Was this film educational? No. But it didn’t have to be. The message taught more than number or letter could ever.

I have to admit, when Big Bird was walking back to Sesame Street I was so worried something was going to happen to him the entire time! I kept jump up from the couch and yelling at the tv for him to watch out or not to go somewhere. He’s so sweet and trusting! I was so worried about him!

I loved seeing the whole family at Sesame Street rally behind saving Big Bird! It was so cute to see them all so worried about him!

There are plenty of funny moments too! Mostly from the Sesame Street fam trying to find Big Bird. From Ernie flying the plane upside down, to Kermit the Frog as a field reporter, to Grover mistaking a yellow car for Big Bird, to Cookie Monster getting so hungry he starts eating the car, to Oscar taking a detour and going to a grouch restaurant. The film had me laughing!

My favorite scene had to be the tossed salad scene at the grouch restaurant! If you haven’t seen it you gotta look it up. I’d die to have been in that restaurant.

The ending is so sweet! I was so relieved and thrilled to see Big Bird’s safe return to Sesame Street and him reunited with everyone.

My little self loved this film! I was so invested in making sure Big Bird got home safely! I also loved seeing all the different character from Sesame Street interacting.

Overall I would give this movie a solid 6/10! If you’ve watched it comment what you loved about it! What should I watch and review next?🤔😁💞

[taiblogcomics]

We're Off to See the Wizard

Hey there, disqualifications. All right, I'm on the final thing in our stack! And we're gonna end the same way we started: with a FiM alt universe fic.

Here's the cover:

Yeah, remember way back when we did "Little Fillies" #1? And I was wondering if they'd do other Classics Reimagined titles? Well, here's one for you! And at least this time, I'm roughly familiar with The Wizard of Oz. Like, I've never read the original books, but I've at least seen the 1939 film a couple times. I know the basic plot from parody and reference and pop culture. I know enough to know the ruby slippers are movie only, and they were silver in the book! Anyways, a pretty nice cover for this. Same artstyle as the "Little Fillies" story as well. This one might grab a few more eyes, at least~

I think we'll do the same thing I did in the Little Fillies review, where I name the character as the original work, then parenthetically refer to the MLP character playing them. So obviously, our depressed farmgirl is Dorothy Gale (Applejack). She lives with Uncle Henry (Big Macintosh) and Auntie Em (initially Rarity, but when she's way into playing Big Mac's wife, they swap her for Granny Smith. They also change the role from wife to mother). While they're making changes, Dorothy demands to be switched into overalls. So much for the iconic gingham~

So, before long, a tornado comes a-spinnin' into the story. Auntie Em! It's a twister! Starring Helen Hunt and Bill Paxton! She chases her dog, Toto (Winona), into the bedroom. This keeps her from enterting the storm cellar instead. And she's gonna wish she'd been in there, because the tornado doesn't just destroy the house, it lifts the whole thing spinning and spinning into another dimension! One with brighter colours! The main comic so far has been in muted, sepia-like colours (not outright monochrome), but springs to "full" colour at this point.

When everything's stopped spinning, Dorothy (just assume this is followed by "and Toto" every time, unless I specify) takes a peek out into this wide new world. She's greeted, not by munchkins, but by Breezies, which is one of the only times they've ever appeared in comics. They're super-enthused to meet a new princess, Dorothy having crushed the previous one. Dorothy tells them that both these facts are wrong, only to be swiftly corrected with the shot of Nightmare Moon's legs sticking out from under the house, silver horseshoes in the air.

Who should enter now but the Good Princess of the North (Celestia). Dorothy objects to the lazy find-replace of "witch" for "princess", but Glinda or Celestia or whoever plows on ahead anyway. She introduces the concepts of one princess per cardinal direction, two good and two wicked, and the Unicorn of Odd (title drop!) who might be even more powerful. Dorothy is about to make a feminist comment, but is interrupted by Nightmare Moon's dissolving. The silver horseshoes are now relinquished, and Celestia forces them on Dorothy to keep the plot moving.

This version does mention the Deadly Desert surrounding the Land of Odd on all sides, which is why she can't immediately go home to Kansas. It's a bit distressing, but Celestia suggests heading east to the Emerald City where the Unicorn lives. And of course, the easiest way to get there? Follow the yellow brick road, of course. The Breezies agree to accompany her to the edge of their territory, and to Dorothy's relief, only the book is in the public domain. Thus, they don't have the rights to use any of the songs~

Finally, just as Dorothy is beginning to tire of the fawning reverence of the Breezies, they reach the end of their lands and part ways. They soon come all up ons a cornfield, and Toto begins to bark. Dorothy's worried for a minute, but it turns out to be just a scarecrow. To her shock, though, the Scarecrow (Pinkie Pie) begins to talk. She's very glad to have somepony new to talk to, since it's all been birds before now. She's just terrible at scaring the crows, to her utter shame. She's just too good at making friends! See how she's made a new one just today~!

Dorothy uses her farm-found applebucking skills to knock the Scarecrow off her perch, freeing the straw-stuffed mare to move around and travel. And travel she does! She decides to accompany Dorothy on her journey, in the hopes of getting a brain from the Unicorn. She's happy enough with a head stuffed with straw, but what she really wants is to plan parties. Can't do that without a brain! And the comic ends as the pair set off, with Scarecrow also needing to be reminded they don't have the rights to the songs. But it's a comic book, so they won't be able to tell if she hums it instead~

Well, this seems like a lot of fun so far. Let's be honest, The Wizard of Oz is a lot more of an exciting and interesting story than Little Women. I'm sorry, but it's true. It'll appeal to your demographic a lot more, too. The roles seem pretty tailor-made for this, and Applejack is a natural snarker. So the asides and fourth wall breaks (there's a whole page of Celestia and Luna I left out to keep up the flow and to allow you to find the jokes on your own as you read) fit more naturally here. They got better at it here, with "Little Fillies" being their testing ground. I look forward to more of this, but alas, this is the only issue I have so far! Just like last time, we'll have to wait until I get a new shipment to finish the series~

Next week, though... Well, I have a few ideas I wanna explore. They'll tide us over in the meantime~

[watching-pictures-move]

Movie Review | The Birds (Hitchcock, 1963)

I’d held off on this one for years despite its cultural footprint as I couldn’t imagine a creature feature falling all that neatly in Hitchcock’s wheelhouse. And the few Hitchcocks I’d seen that also fell outside the particular kind of thriller I associate with him hadn’t been among his best. The Trouble With Harry is not without its charms but it also felt like Hitchcock having a goof, and Torn Curtain has at least one very good sequence (a surprising violent and bruising fight scene) but it’s clear that Hitchcock has no enthusiasm for the Cold War espionage plot.

What I can say about The Birds is that animal attacks might not seem like a natural fit for Hitchcock, but he very much brings the material into his pet concerns. He seems to identify with its sadism, taking some glee in having the characters being attacked, even small children, with a lot more blood than you’d expect from a 1963 studio picture. And we even get a corpse with its eyes gruesomely plucked out, so I have to assume Lucio Fulci enjoyed this movie (and if I recall threw in a scene that might have had similar results at the end of Manhattan Baby). He also takes care to sketch out the material in terms of its comedic potential, playing the first half of the movie as a conflict turned budding romance between the two leads with only subtle hints of what’s to come. And when things go south, he channels the action through a sense of jangled nerves, showing multiple characters undergo varying degrees of psychological disintegration.

And you don’t need me to tell you this, but there are some pretty masterful sequences of suspense. There’s one where Tippi Hedren is sitting in the foreground, and the sly editing lets the number of birds behind her sneak up on you. (The “yellow screen” in this scene and the bird attacks is quite noticeable, but the fact that the movie looks like a postcard helps alleviate any rough edges. The artificiality is not necessarily a weakness in light of such forceful direction.) There are the reaction shots when the character’s dropped match proves catastrophic. There is the scene where the house is under attack, the windows and doors proving all too fallible and the constant squawking of the birds grating on your nerves like the frantic strings from Psycho. And the scene where the characters need to be very, very quiet so they can get to the car.

Great stuff. The ‘Cock has done it again!

[violetfeatherwind]

Introduction/Rules for my blog

Name: Mila

Name pronouncing: mee-la

Gender: Female (she/her)

Username origin: Got it from the side of a Kellogg’s Unicorn cereal box where you search for your “Unicorn Name”. My name begins with an “M” and it was next to the word “Violet”. My birthday is in October, and that was next to “Feather Wind”. It’s also where I got the idea of giving myself purple feather earrings, even though I don’t own any.

Goals: Creating an independent animation studio where I can create original projects/becoming an animator

Personal animation preference: 2D animation that is traditionally hand drawn/detailed. Doesn’t matter the art style or medium. Nothing rigged, puppeted, or limited.

Likes: Cartoons (mostly western), animation, Hot Topic, comics, alternative styles (like grunge, goth, scene, punk, etc), boys’ clothing, animals (such as puppies, frogs, manatees, small birds, axolotls, Guinea pigs, etc), cyberpunk style, sci-fi, techno music, big band music, jazz music space themes/aesthetics, musicals, original songs, creating original characters, hanging out with friends, talking about interests to my friends, when people respect my likes and boundaries, soda (no diet or zero), junk food, cheese pizza (depends on where it’s from, I’m picky), going to the movies, traveling, sketchbooks, art stores, soap, having my hair straight, when my face is clear, singing, and plushies (there’s tons more, but here’s what I can think of😅)

Dislikes: When people don’t respect my dislikes and boundaries, making noises/showing me stuff/talking about stuff I don’t like/playing something just to tick me off or see my reaction, being taken advantage of, people being ***holes online (and irl), when someone says their opinions are facts, when people use their race/ethnicity as an excuse for how their parents raised/treated them (or just about anything that has nothing to do with their race), people pushing their agenda on to people, corporal punishment, people forcing their religion or beliefs onto others, politics, when people don’t take me seriously, being ignored, when people say my opinions and preferences are wrong, when I say that I have never seen/heard of/been interested in a certain genre/food/movie or show and they say “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! SERIOUSLY?! HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW/LIKE THAT?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”, feces humor, creepy crawlers and insects (like spiders, hornets, bees, flies, wasps, yellow jackets, beetles, roaches, etc), getting water in my ears and nose, acne, when something I wanted to buy being sold out, when I can’t find what I’m looking for at a certain store, needles, rude people, ableist people, when people tell me: “Well, that’s life for ya” or “That’s just life, get used to it” and stuff like that, when people don’t flush the toilet or don’t wipe the toilet seat, artificial intelligence (AI), when bots follow me, creepy people online leaving weird messages, untrustworthy people, and promotional comments (oof! That’s a long list!😅)

Do’s and Don’ts:

Do:

Reblog and like my posts including my work (if you want)

Type down a nice comment (if you want)

Be respectful to others in the comments

Share my work around with friends and family (just NO reposting my work even if you give credit)

Keep stuff here mostly SFW

Don’t:

Harass me and others

Follow me for no reason (or without taking the time to know what I post)

Go into direct messages and send me NSFW content, comments, and links

Critique my work when I didn’t ask for it

Reblog with a hateful, negative, gawking comment

Be an ***hole

Send death threats

Be a creep

Be racist, hateful towards LGBT people and topics, or ableist

Repost my work and claim it as your own

Send promotions

Interact if you are a bot or support AI

What I post:

Original art

Fan art

Serotonin

Reviews

Animals

Memes

Animation

Hauls

Cartoons and movies

And more

Franchises I talk about:

Invader Zim

Sonic the Hedgehog

NiGHTS Into/Journey of Dreams

Balan Wonderworld

Hazbin Hotel

Helluva Boss

Murder Drones

Nightmare Before Christmas

Poppy Playtime

Bendy and the Ink Machine/Dark Revival

And more

(Note: might edit this post later!)

[andrewmoocow]

Little Homeworld Life chapter 20: Famethyst Reunion (originally posted on May 8, 2023)

AN: For almost three years now, I've basically made Holly Blue Agate into my personal punching bag whenever I need a member of the Rutile Rebels to suffer, and frankly I made the right choice. Yellow Diamond says that an Agate must terrify, but Holly takes it to a whole new level with her abuse of the Famethyst. While it was amusing to see nobody give her any attention in the original Future now that she's been stripped of her privileges, Holly Blue was part of my initial roster of enemy Gems teaming up to get revenge on Steven that I came up with in the lead-up to the movie's release, so that's where she landed herself in the world of Alternate Future. But now, just like what Two Birds on a Wire was for Aquamarine and Eyeball, this chapter shall decide whether our favorite abusive Agate still has a place in Black Rutile's inner circle or if she should try making a change.

Synopsis: The Famethyst want to enroll in Little Homeschool, and Cherry Quartz is nominated to show them around. Desperate to be as far away from the Quartzes as possible, Holly Blue Agate tries to spoil the tour.

Cast:

Christine Pedi as Holly Blue Agate

Kimberly Brooks as Cherry Quartz, Jasper, Superfan Rose, Hippie Rose, Shy Rose, Skinny Jasper, Carnelian, Angel Aura Quartz, Zebra Jasper, Biggs Jasper, Dalmatian Jasper, Flint

Michaela Dietz as Amethyst, Famethyst, Blue Lace Agate, Ocean Jasper, Crazy Lace Agate, Tiger's Eye, Chert, Lace Amethyst

Noël Wells as Black Rutile

Della Saba as Aquamarine

Charlyne Yi as Eyeball

Casey Lee Williams as Cat's Eye

John Mulaney as Flipso

Estelle as Garnet

Deedee Magno Hall as Pearl, Volleyball

Tom Scharpling as Greg

Cristina Vee as Jay-Ten

Lamar Abrams as Wy-Six

Shelby Rabara as Peridot

Jennifer Paz as Lapis

Uzo Aduba as Bismuth

Lauren Ash as White Topaz

Zehra Fazal as Zoisite

Toks Olagundoye as Mayor Nanafua

--

"Okay, class, now that we've reviewed proper pressure point techniques, I'd like one of you to come up and demonstrate what you've learned," Jasper said to her self-defense class one summer day in Little Homeworld. "Who would like to go first?"

"I do, I do!" Cherry Quartz eagerly said while raising her hand. "I've been listening the whole time!"

"Ah, Cherry Quartz, good to see such an attentive student." Jasper grinned at the spotted quartz as she walked up to Holly Blue. "Now then, remember what I have taught you and go from there."

"Okay, Cherry, remember what Jasper taught you." Cherry repeated to herself while examining the Agate turned unwilling training dummy, who was already sweating in terror and breathing shakily.

"Please go easy on me." Holly Blue whimpered pathetically before Cherry struck her in the chest, the knees, the eyes, and between her legs in short order. When Cherry decided to finish her off with a neck pinch, Holly had been the reluctant teaching assistant long enough to know something was wrong. "What are you doing?!"

"I'm giving you a neck pinch, just like Jasper taught us," Cherry replied innocently.

"No, no, no, stupid, you've got it much too high." Holly corrected while pointing to where her neck should be pinched. "It should be down here, where the shoulder meets the neck."

"Like this?" Cherry asked as she followed Holly's instructions.

"Precisely," Holly replied before she collapsed from the damage taken to her form. "Oh, someone just poof me now."

"I'm surprised you didn't after taking that many hits," Jasper observed the collapsed Agate before turning back to her class. "Okay, everyone, next time I'll teach you how to poof a Gem with just a few hits! That's all; now get out of here!" As the class began to leave, Jasper turned back to Holly Blue. "And that goes for you too. The thought of seeing you lie there makes me sick."

"No, you make me sick," Holly grumbled as she got up and trudged away from Jasper. "I hate everything about this planet so much."

--

"And you know what was worst about today?!" Holly Blue complained to Black Rutile as soon as she got home to vent her frustrations, even though she was hardly paying attention and was more focused on looking at Yatter on her computer while sipping some coffee. "Cherry didn't even get the neck pinch right, so I had to remind her how to do it!"

"Yes, yes, boo-hoo-hoo, woe is me and such." Black Rutile replied coldly. "I guess that's what happens when you've been abusing Quartz gems for thousands of years just because the Diamonds told you to."

"Yeah, I have to agree with Rooty on this one." Flipso agreed with his Gem partner while Black Rutile gave him a confused look for the nickname she was given. "I mean, were you always like this, or did you get so far up your big blue butt that you stopped caring for anyone else but yourself and your status?"

"What are you trying to do? Get my life story?" Holly Blue asked confusedly and tried to walk away, only to turn around and discover Flipso giving her puppy dog eyes. "Ah well, since you seem so insistent, I'll tell."

--

When Holly Blue first emerged in the Kindergarten from when she was created on the planet Glados, she was given one purpose alone. To train Homeworld's Quartz soldiers to be perfect warriors, no matter how rough she may be. However, Holly was a bit tougher on the Quartzes she taught than expected; the Diamonds believed it was a necessary evil to create the soldiers they wanted for battle.

Eventually, when Pink Diamond was shattered and her human zoo was left without someone to watch over it and the Amethysts, Jaspers, Carnelians, and other Quartzes within, Blue Diamond needed someone to keep them all in line so they don't slack off on watching over the humans they kept prisoner. So naturally, she selected Holly Blue Agate for the job.

"I promise you, your grand clarity, I will not fail you!" Holly Blue eagerly declared, starting a career that would define her for the next couple thousand years. However, everything changed once the Crystal Gems infiltrated the zoo, and they ruined her life within just a few short hours. Because she was more focused on the Sapphire among them to notice that the Pearl didn't bother hiding the star on her chest, the Crystal Gems played her for a complete fool. They made their escape with the latest human prisoner while she was left to become a plaything of the quartzes, or the Famethyst, as the minuscule Amethyst called them.

Era 3 made things worse as not only did Steven convince everyone that Pink Diamond was his mother, he conned the entire Gem race into abandoning the caste system altogether, leaving Holly without anybody to take orders from as the Famethyst continued bullying her with no repercussions.

"I have to get out of here and fast!" Holly Blue panted harshly as she hid from some boisterous Amethysts in the containment area of the zoo. "Curse that Steven! He took advantage of my loyalty and played me like a total idiot! Now I have nothing else except for those off-color Gems always picking on me."

"Hey, Holly, you still want to play tag with us?" Carnelian giggled as she and her skinny Jasper friend searched the containment area for Holly Blue. "Come on; we'll let you be it!"

"Eh, I say we let her run." The skinny Jasper responded coolly, unaware that a shadow with half-shaven hair was looming before her. "Makes it more exciting that way." Just then, she felt someone tap her on the shoulder, and she turned around. "Uh, can I help you? How did you get here?"

"You left the door open." Zoisite coldly answered before socking Skinny Jasper in the face, knocking her out cold. "I had to fight through dozens of your friends to reach my target."

"Hey, what's the big idea?!" Carnelian yelled as Zoisite pulled a destabilizer from her gem to stab Carnelian with, the intense electric shocks making the little red Gem shriek in agony before her physical form gave out and escaped to her gem.

"The big idea is that I'm looking for someone," Zoisite replied before she began calling out to Holly. "Come on out, Holly Blue Agate, you're safe now!"

"What, who said that?" Holly Blue asked meekly while peeking out of some bushes. "Zoisite, is that you? Where have you been all this time?"

"Oh, you know, fighting Gem criminals before a certain someone changed everything." Zoisite proclaimed. "That is why I came here and took down all those off-colors. I have a friend who is demanding that you come with me, and she won't take no for an answer."

"Now, just a second, Zoisite." Holly Blue stated. "You can't just barge in here, take down all these unruly Gems and expect me to do as you say! As much as I love taking orders, I refuse to listen to a mere assassin!"

"Well, you should because this assassin is your only chance at returning to your old life!" Zoisite began arguing with Holly Blue when she heard her communicator going off. "One second, I have to take this." She muttered before pulling out her communicator to talk to her partner Dalmatian Jasper on the other end. "Hello?"

"Zoisite, I got another Ruby and an Aquamarine." Dalmatian Jasper declared on her end of the call. "How are things on your end?"

"Not great," Zoisite replied glumly. "This Holly Blue is really grating on my nerves."

"You take that back!" Holly Blue yelled, starting another argument while Dalmatian Jasper kept watching.

--

"I can still hear their laughter when I close my eyes." Holly Blue whispered in terror. "Their insults, their cheering, the breaking of valuables. The horror, the horror."

"You can have PTSD in front of me later; I'm working here." Black Rutile said while reading from her psychology book. "Or maybe you're just being overdramatic because you refuse to accept change."

"Says you!" Holly Blue yelled back at Black Rutile. "You nearly destroyed the Earth because you refused to accept change!"

"Yes, but I believed that Steven would be a detriment to our society, that he was no better than Pink Diamond!" Black Rutile argued. "My utter Brobdingnagian hatred for Pink and how she wanted everything her way extended to her wretched spawn and how he actually succeeded in making everything his way!" Just then, a loud rumbling came from outside, followed by casting a large shadow over the Rutile Rebels' house. "What was that?"

"Either my mother-in-law is coming, or we're due for a plot development." Flipso answered as Black Rutile and Holly Blue looked out their window to discover the human zoo descending towards Earth. "I'll have you know; my mother-in-law is one of the most dangerous beings in the omniverse. Rumor has it she once made the One Above All cry."

"No, not them, anyone but them!" Holly Blue shrieked in terror and began breathing rapidly while reliving traumatic memories of losing everything because of Steven. "Why did they have to come back?!"

"What is happening here?!" Cat's Eye yelled as she, her cat Blake, Aquamarine, and the Rubies stepped into the living room to see Holly Blue curled up into a ball, having a panic attack. "And what's up with Holly?"

"No need to alarm everyone; she's just having a panic attack." Black Rutile assured her subordinates while looking through her psychology book again, even though Holly Blue was too shaken to hear her. "We'll just need to give her some space until she recovers."

"Wow, what a realistic portrayal of a panic attack; someone calls the film buffs on Yatter!" Flipso laughed as Holly Blue continued panting sharply and grabbed at her chest. She couldn't deal with them again or even think of them again. Nonetheless, it was the fate she was forced into the moment she was banished to Little Homeschool.

"Hey, I think she's coming back!" Aquamarine exclaimed as Holly Blue's panic attack subsided, and she was helped to her feet by Cat's Eye.

"So what was that all about?" Cat asked a panting Holly.

"My apologies, just some bad memories of my first encounter with Steven," Holly stated while hugging Cat's Eye tight. "Please don't ever abuse me like those rowdy Amethysts did, promise?"

"Well, look who's talking?" Flipso sneered at the touching scene before him. "We all know you're just making stuff up as you go along to make people feel sorry for you. Like my distant cousin, for example, they're like a child of the stars who claimed not to know diddly squat about death even though he gave a fascist Puritan dictator the means to commit magical genocide!"

"I'm not even going to bother comprehending what you're talking about." Black Rutile muttered in annoyance as she walked outside to see the Crystal Gems helping a large group of humans out of the zoo. "Wait, are those the zoo humans? What are they doing here?"

"Oh, is this that Black Rutile we keep hearing about?" one of them, a curvy blonde with green eyes, asked as she got awkwardly close to Black Rutile. "Hello there, my name is Jay-Ten; it is nice to meet you."

"Charmed, I'm sure." Black Rutile nervously greeted Jay-Ten with a handshake. "Now, can anyone care to tell me what is going on right now?"

"As part of atoning for their atrocities, the Diamonds have decided now is the time to dismantle the human zoo and relocate everyone in it to Earth," Garnet answered. "So we implore you and your friends to be on your best behavior, Black Rutile."

"Eh, behave this, you guys!" Amethyst cried as she turned to face her fellow Amethysts emerging from the ship. "Yo, Famethyst, welcome to Earth!"

"8XM!" the massive array of Amethysts, Jaspers, and one Carnelian yelled in delight as they began stampeding towards Amethyst, while Holly Blue could only stand and watch as her worst nightmares were now here on the same planet as her. The only thing she could do was collapse from shock.

"Amethyst, it's been ages!" Carnelian shrieked while grabbing Amethyst and spinning her around. "How has Little Homeworld been?"

"Been doing great lately." Amethyst laughed happily. "I am so glad you guys are going to stay here; we got so much on Earth to show you."

"So, you must be Jasper, eh?" Skinny Jasper said to Jasper. "Have to say, I guess the stories about you were true."

"A defective Jasper, huh?" Jasper nodded to her defective, skinnier counterpart while the other Quartzes of Little Homeworld were reintroduced to the Famethyst. "Never would I see the day."

"Hey, Holly Blue!" one of the Amethysts shouted to the passed-out Agate. "Something the matter?"

"Oh, don't mind her; she's just too traumatized to interact with you." Black Rutile said while picking up Holly Blue and shaking her awake. "WAKE UP, YOU WORTHLESS DRAMA QUEEN! DON'T YOU DARE HAVE A MOMENT OF CLARITY THAT WILL CONVINCE YOU TO CHANGE YOUR WAYS ON MY WATCH, YOU HEAR ME?!"

"Give her a bit. She'll come to." Chest Rose answered relaxedly. "Oh hey Pearl, long time no see, babe."

"Ehehehehe, hello Rose Quartzes." Pearl laughed nervously, pulling at her shirt collar while surrounded by the three Rose Quartzes who accompanied her, Steven, and Volleyball to the Reef, along with dozens of others. "It's a pleasure meeting you all again."

"Well, if all these Quartz Gems want to know more about Earth and Little Homeworld, then it's only logical that a Quartz shall give them the tour." Peridot stated. "Any volunteers?"

"I'll do it!" Cherry Quartz accepted the proposition. "I call dibs!"

"Hey, I saw them first!" Tiger's Eye added competitively, followed by Blue Lace & Crazy Lace Agate, Ocean, Zebra & Biggs Jasper, Lace Amethyst, Angel Aura Quartz, and Flint & Chert crowding around Cherry.

"Good to see you're all so eager," Lapis responded as the human zoo Quartzes all gathered around the Little Homeworld Quartzes, and they began showing them around Little Homeworld. "Now then, while Cherry and Tiger's Eye is giving them the tour, let's try and get these humans situated here."

"Just as long as Ga-Reg doesn't show his face and refuse to choose us again!" Wy-Six added sourly.

"You know, we should start thinking of expanding the place soon." Bismuth pointed out. "I mean, with this many Gems excited to move in, I'm not sure if Little Homeworld can fit all of them without having to move some out."

"Uh uh, no, thank you!" Holly objected to the notion. "Only a few Quartzes causing trouble is enough; imagine how much chaos even more of them could cause!" Unfortunately, nobody was listening to her, much to Holly's anger as she growled and stomped away.

--

"Hehehe, look at him go!" Flipso chuckled as he played a video game about running cookies. "Go, little Earth snack, run from that witch!"

"You there, jester!" Holly Blue yelled as she barged in on Flipso's gaming session, interrupting the chaos god's train of thought and giving him a game over. "Help me with my problems, now!"

"I was in the middle of something, lady!" Flipso complained as he switched off his game and stomped up to Holly Blue. "What do you want?!"

"I require your assistance because I'm currently facing a crisis." Holly Blue answered. "These Amethysts that have menaced me in my time as overseer of the human zoo are moving to Earth, and they're sure to make my life a living nightmare once again. Are there any spells you have that could just poof them away?"

"Oh no, sistah, I may be a psychopathic wielder of all-powerful chaos energy, but I got a specific set of rules I made for myself to follow!" Flipso stated as he presented a large purple book with 'DA RULES' written on the front and opened it to read its contents. "Rule #24601, my powers are not to be exploited for petty gain. Any attempts at that will result in me stabbing whichever schmuck tries to do it in the back and possibly preventing them from ever existing. Depends on my mood, though, so consider yourself lucky."

"Wait for a second; you have a set of rules?" Holly asked, trying not to laugh at such a concept. "Since when?"

"I've been causing chaos for so long; even I keep forgetting." Flipso remarked while putting the book away. "Which reminds me, would you care to hear how my powers have influenced human history? I once destroyed Pompeii after using Mount Vesuvius as a barbecue pit. There was also a little game of pigskin with the boys where someone threw the football a little too hard, and that became the meteor that killed the dinosaurs. Ooh, I also once caused that earthquake in east Japan followed by that tsunami because I was in the bathroom after eating some bad taquitos. And I also once had a cold, and I sneezed on some rats who started spreading the Black Plague. Also, do you want to know why Pluto is no longer considered a planet? That was me!"

Holly Blue could only stare in shock at the audacity of this being as he cheerfully reminisced on the death and destruction that he played a part in over the centuries. This was different from what the Diamonds formerly did because it was their duty; this creature acted like this was a hobby he indulged in every day. No wonder Black Rutile wanted to free him; he was just as ambivalent towards the safety of others as she was!

--

"So, let me get this straight, Crystal Gems." Mayor Nanafua Pizza said to the Crystal Gems in her office. "These humans are from a space zoo owned by the Diamonds, but now they want nothing to do with the zoo anymore and have handed their humans over to you."

"Yes, that is exactly what we're doing here; we wish to have the Zoomans officially recognized as citizens so they can start a new life here, free from captivity." Pearl nodded before finding Wy-Six trying to eat a book off the shelf. "Hey, that's not food!"

"Then why does it look so delicious?" Wy-Six innocently asked as Pearl cleaned up the drool-covered book and returned it to the shelf.

"Some things just aren't meant to be eaten," Pearl advised Wy-Six. "Unless you're Amethyst. She once ate a cloud and became inflated like a balloon."

"I got hit by an airplane!" Amethyst laughed while remembering that event.

"Well, do they have any birth certificates we can find?" Nanafua asked.

"Not that we know of," Garnet replied. "As far as we know, the Zoomans are all descendants of the humans that were brought to the zoo, and no other human has been captured for millennia before Greg."

"Hey Gems, heard you guys were doing something about that crazy zoo up in space." Greg declared as he stepped into the mayor's office as if someone made him appear by saying his name three times. "You know, I'd be more than happy to help; you just need to say the-"

"Look, everyone; it is Ga-Reg!" one of the Zoomans yelled, pointing an accusing finger at Greg, who was left wide-eyed in shock at seeing them again. "You should know we refuse to forgive you for rejecting us!"

"Look, I said I was flattered that you wanted to choose me or whatever, but I just wasn't feeling it!" Greg nervously laughed. "Maybe we could start over?"

"Get him!" another Zooman commanded, making Greg run for his life from the stampeding Zoomans as they began chasing him across Beach City.

"I think someone has a ton of explaining to do." Jasper growled as she, Garnet, Lapis, and White Topaz followed the Zooman horde outside. "The rest of you take care of things here. We'll go save Greg."

"Figured he would've shown up at the wrong place at the wrong time." Garnet declared morosely.

"Though I must admit, it was pretty funny how they ganged up on him." White Topaz laughed.

"Oh, extremely funny!" Jasper chuckled before the four Gems set off to save Greg from the angry mob.

--

Back at Little Homeworld, Holly Blue was now digging a hole in the ground with rigorous tenacity, all while Cat's Eye watched with bemusement as she stroked Blake. "Uh, what are you digging a hole for? Are you planning to dig to China or something?"

"No, this is but a trap that I shall you to imprison those off-color Gems and finally get them out of my hair!" Holly Blue cackled. "Once they fall into the pit, I'll refill the hole and make sure they never find a way to get out!"

"Or you could just calmly tell them that their mistreatment of you has caused you extreme stress," Cat advised. "Seriously, I get that you're stressed, but this is a little much."

"Ooh, I got an even better idea!" Holly cackled evilly. "I'll get them all poofed, and then I'll put them in a box! Then I'll put that box inside of another box, and then I'll mail that box to myself, and when it arrives, I'll smash it with a hammer!" She let out another insane laugh, signaling to Cat's Eye that she has officially gone mad with either revenge, trauma, or, most likely, both.

"Holly, my dearest friend, your mouth is moving. Words are coming out. This is not good." Cat's Eye firmly stated as she grabbed Holly by the wrist and dragged her out of her hole. "Seriously, what did Dr. Sucrose say about this? Learning to stand up for yourself by being fair but still a little stern at the same time?"

"Do you really think that'll work?" Holly asked nervously. "For real life?"

"Yeah, whatever you just said, darling." Cat gave the Agate a sweet, feline grin while Blake let out an innocent meow.

"Fine, if it'll make you happy." Holly sighed as she walked away before stopping to turn her head. "Oh, and uh, Cat? You're a pretty good friend."

"You're too kind," Cat smirked as Black Rutile appeared. "Oh, hey, BR."

"What is Holly Blue doing?" Black Rutile asked the former lawyer. "I wanted to give her a new assignment."

"Oh, she's off to finally call out that Famethyst for their abuse of her." Cat revealed to her leader's shock.

"Oh no, am I in danger of losing yet another minion?!" Black Rutile asked fearfully as she tried following Holly Blue. "Well, I won't allow th-AAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Before she could walk any further, the Rutile fell into the hole that Holly had dug. "WHERE DID THIS HOLE COME FROM?!"

"You should've watched your step," Cat smirked at the Rutile's expense.

"NOW YOU TELL ME!" Black Rutile complained as she tried to climb back up.

--

"And right here, you have the best view in all of Little Homeschool." Cherry Quartz declared as she took the zoo Quartzes to the top of the whirlybird tower, where they all could see Beach City from miles away. "Pretty impressive, huh?"

"Killer." Chest Rose replied in amazement.

"Wow, it feels like I'm flying!" Shoulder Rose cheered in excitement.

"Don't get too excited, Rosie; I wouldn't want you to fall." Tiger's Eye said, trying to calm the super-eager Rose down. "We may be invulnerable, but we can't be too careful."

"She's right. We're really high up." Navy Rose agreed with Tiger's Eye, looking down at the ground way down below.

"Hey, wanna see who lands first?" one of the Amethysts suggested just as Holly Blue managed to find the Famethyst on top of the tower. "Let's use Holly Blue as a test!"

"Stop." Holly Blue firmly said, stopping the Amethyst where she stood. "Just stop."

"Whoa, she's not screaming in our faces for once." Skinny Jasper whispered to Carnelian. "She must be really serious."

"It's time we had a talk." Holly declared calmly, despite looking so enraged. "For nearly three years since the Crystal Gems came into our lives, you've treated me as nothing more than a punching bag because you think I deserved it for all the horrible things I did to you."

"Well, you do!" Carnelian exclaimed. "I mean, all the yelling and screaming and blaming us for stuff we didn't do! It's called karma, HB; get used to it!"

"And that is why I'm sorry!" Holly Blue finally shouted, much to the shock of the Famethyst, that she would say such a thing and without a hint of mockery too. "I'm sorry that I was so horrible to all of you; I only wanted to follow my orders to the letter, and look how that turned out! And I'll only follow through with this apology if you promise never to abuse me again! As of this moment, it's over. I'm finished being everybody's butt-monkey!"

"Wait, are you serious?" another Amethyst murmured in shock at Holly taking responsibility for her actions for once.

"Well, this got intense real quick." Navy Rose added.

"Hey, can I talk with the gang real quick?" Skinny Jasper asked as she and the rest of the Famethyst huddled to discuss Holly's apology. "So what do you think? Should we forgive and forget?"

"Look, guys, I know Holly seems like she genuinely wants to change, but I'm having second thoughts right off the bat." An Amethyst whispered her two cents. "Last I remember, she got in trouble for falling in with Black Rutile, and we all know how much of a liar she is. Why don't we just cut our losses and leave her up here?"

"Well, we should just keep an eye on her, just in case." Carnelian agreed before turning back to Holly. "Listen, Holly, just because you apologized to us doesn't mean we'll just instantly forget all the bad things you did to us. But if you really want to make a change for the better, unlike some Gems we've heard of, that's okay with us."

"And we promise to try and go a little easier on you." Skinny Jasper added, making everyone laugh while Holly Blue let out a sigh of relief.

"Thank you all for understanding," Holly said gratefully. "It felt so good to just get that off my chest at last and maybe grow as a person along the way."

"There you are; I've been looking all over for you!" Black Rutile yelled as she reached the top of the tower to confront Holly. "Come with me now; I have a new assignment for you!"

"Wait, really?" Holly asked as she was pulled away from the Famethyst.

"I knew she'd still hang with her." Skinny Jasper muttered.

"Oh well, hopefully, she keeps her end of the deal." Cherry Quartz replied. "Now then, back to the tour!"

--

"What do you want me for?" Holly Blue asked Black Rutile as the two rebels against Era 3 walked to the bottom of the whirlybird tower. "I was just about to have a moment of clarity and possibly redemption here!"

"Not on my watch, Holly!" Black Rutile stated. "I'm not about to let Steven strip you of your ability to think for yourself because I have a new job for you!"

"What kind of job?" Holly Blue asked before Black Rutile presented her with a hologram of the Seer to the Void and Rasputina's grimoire from her visor.

"Just a little breaking and entering." Black Rutile answered. "The Seer to the Void and Rasputina's grimoire are currently located in the Burning Room in the Crystal Temple, and Garnet can only access it via her gems. If you convince her to let you in, you can take both those items and be home free."

"But what do you need them for?" Holly Blue asked again.

"It's finally time to unleash Flipso." Black Rutile declared before she let out an evil laugh. "I've kept him waiting long enough, and now his godlike power will be mine to control!"

--

"Everyone, please calm down!" Garnet yelled to the Zoomans as they continued trying to hunt Greg down for his transgressions. "Just listen to Greg, and we can work things out!"

"I'm starting to think this was a bad idea!" Greg exclaimed as he locked himself in his van to hide from the Zoomans. However, that didn't stop the rampaging humans from trying to knock it over. "The universe must have a really twisted sense of humor right now."

"This is going to take all day." Jasper groaned in disgust.

"No, feels like we were chasing them from eleven to thirty minutes now." White Topaz replied. "Lapis, got any ideas?"

"How about I just stick them all in a big bubble?" Lapis suggested. "That should keep them from running around town like crazy?"

"That sounds utterly crazy!" Jasper objected to the idea.

"Well, sometimes crazy works." Garnet disagreed with Jasper. "Go for it, Lapis." At Garnet's command, Lapis summoned water from the nearby shore to wrap the Zoomans in before turning it into a big bubble to contain them. "Nice one."

"Oh, thank you, Lapis, you're a lifesaver!" Greg sighed in relief. "So gang, ready to hear me out now?"

"Okay Ga-Reg, we apologize for our recklessness," Wy-Six replied.

"We just still can't stop holding a grudge," Jay-Ten added. "Hopefully, you can forgive us for trying to hurt you as you hurt us."

"Aw, I can't stay mad at you guys." Greg chuckled.

"Well, that leaves that plotline finally tied up." Garnet sighed in relief. "Time to see how Pearl and the others are doing."

"Hold on a second!" Holly Blue cried as she raced up to Garnet. "Garnet, could you perhaps spare a moment of your time to show me the Burning Room?"

"Well, this is very sudden and quite suspicious," Garnet remarked. "I hope you don't have any ulterior motives."

"No way, I just want to see how empty it is and whether you still have any corrupted Gems left over!" Holly lied through her teeth.

"Guess I got some time to kill." Garnet agreed, making Holly smirk at how the fusion bought her fib hook, line, and sinker. "Come with me. I'll show you around."

"I got a bad feeling about this." White Topaz declared fearfully as Garnet and Holly Blue departed for the Crystal Temple.

--

"Ooh, I love what you've done with the place!" Holly Blue gasped in amazement at the emptied Burning Room, which still had a scant few bubbles containing valuable objects floating around. Two of them, in particular, were just the ones she needed. "Ooh, what are those two?"

"That's the Seer to the Void that we confiscated from Black Rutile, along with the grimoire that belonged to the sorceress Rasputina," Garnet explained to the Agate, who was getting inordinately close to the two bubbles. "I'd like to know why you're so interested in them." Just then, her future vision clued her to Holly's true intentions. "Oh no!"

"Thank you so much for the invitation, Garnet!" Holly Blue laughed heartily as she raced out of the Burning Room onto the Warp Pad. "And the goodie basket was a nice surprise too!"

"Wait, stop!" Garnet cried as Holly Blue disappeared, no doubt returning to Little Homeworld to see Black Rutile. "I have to warn the others and fast!"

--

Holly Blue reappeared on the Warp Pad at Little Homeworld, where the Rutile Rebels eagerly awaited her arrival. "I got them, my Rutile." She said while handing the bubbles over to Black Rutile and taking a bow. "Now, he can be free to smite worlds as he did in days long past."

"Excellent work, Holly Blue." Black Rutile smirked deviously as she patted Holly Blue on the shoulder. "I knew you wouldn't give up on me."

"Finally, let's get this party started!" Flipso cackled in triumph.

--

The time has come for Flipso to regain his physical form and wreak all sorts of havoc on Little Homeworld, Beach City, and perhaps beyond if the Crystal Gems don't stop him! But is he really on the Rutile Rebels' side or has Black Rutile been cooperating with a force that she cannot control? What could this mean for her relationship with the Crystal Gems at large? We'll find out next week when Flipso takes the scene at long last! Wow, I can't believe we're only six chapters left already.

[snakest1cks]

I posted 11,880 times in 2022

37 posts created (0%)

11,843 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@starvy

@jayisgay

@larry-the-demon

@jezebelgoldstone

@crow-enthusiast

I tagged 573 of my posts in 2022

#cache - 34 posts

#tad talks - 20 posts

#this is about yugioh - 18 posts

#art - 9 posts

#literally - 7 posts

#correct - 6 posts

#tsv - 6 posts

#for winter - 6 posts

#for a rainy day - 5 posts

#yes - 5 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#yes there are two entire floors of this building locked up but if you climb out onto the roof (easy) you can get into the attic to have sex

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

nah nah nah i got this

dni if you:

have never shared a bedroom w your family members, have never eaten food from a trashcan, dislike sauerkraut, regularly wear slippers, prefer black coffee, were a soap potion kid, favor the lower right burner on a stove, do not know who sam the gun safety eagle is, own more than one charging cord of the same type, live in a city with nationwide name recognition in your country, dislike lettuce, have a strong preference for either cats or dogs, don't like vanilla ice cream, play an instrument with any degree of competence, have never pulled out a calculator when shopping (online or otherwise), refer to celebrities or fictional characters by their first names, have never babysat, can tie 5 or more knots, or genuinely prefer to use yellow highlighters over other colors.

12 notes - Posted March 11, 2022

#4

oh no little weed boy,,, don't go into the german cave!!

15 notes - Posted March 3, 2022

#3

legally required to interact:

girls who are just like their dad, analog media preferrers, movie gifset rebloggers, people with crooked teeth, people who get lost in department stores, nalgene water bottle loyalists, people who are regularly told that they would be great parents, homos, tangerine enthusiasts, people who switched schools a lot as kids, eaters of mysterious sidewalk candy, designated house (de)winterizers, laundry doers, shampoo snobs, people who love the color orange, kitty cats, little birds, good dogs, picker-uppers of insects and amphibians, amateur bakers, balcony supremacists, poets, obligate daydreamers, pancake lovers, white trash communists, boys who work in food service, clothes menders, trend enjoyers, perfume wearers, animal trainers, historic curfew obeyers, dweebs, nerds, geeks, and goths.

27 notes - Posted March 21, 2022

#2

i love them your honor

42 notes - Posted January 31, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

i literally cannot escape

83,712 notes - Posted May 4, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[radio-jack]

licechamp woo hi nickname: Savvy !! (short for Savannah) sign: picses :3 height: 5'3 but i commonly picture myself with my hooves that add '6 to my height last thing i googled: The Poison Jungle reviews (i wanted to see all of the homophobic reviews about the lesbian dragons) song stuck in my head: The Red Means I Love You followers: 25 sleep: around 4 hours (ik im horrible) lucky number: 7 and 49 !! dream job: man im just working in small places like coffee shops i dont have big dreams wearing: a thrifted shirt with puertorican frogs on it, a green sweatshirt, camo cargo pants that are full of assorted pens and trinkets, a white belt covered in keychains and other accessories, wool fingerless gloves, bracelets and rings, some cool blue and yellow socks, and a green beanie (mind you im wearing all of this at 12:40am movies/books that summarize you: Bohemian Rhapsody (i have a flair for the dramatic, im queer, and im dying) favorite song: Little Miss Perfect !! (my last favorite was Shia Labeouf Live in which i listened to it almost 500 times in two weeks) favorite instrument: the double/upright bass !! i used to play it :D aesthetic: i feel like id consider myself like. a weird mixture between alt and cottagecore ? favorite authors: Tui T. Sutherland and Stephen King ! favorite animal noises: either cat chattering or the call of a common loon (the bird you always hear in horror movies despite it almost never being the right habitat or time of year for a loon) random: i have 6 bitches

tagging uhh @sunkreide @delphicnova @possiblysoil @3-14applepie !!! :D

17 questions, 17 people

I was tagged by @larosezen ! thanks, i haven’t done one of these in a long time ^^

nickname: lisou

sign: libra

height: 1m69 (which makes me 5'6)

last thing i googled: how to convert my height into ft and inches lmao

song stuck in my head: i woke up and instantly wanted to listen to ausgehen by annenmaykantereit (my beloved)

no. of followers: 1 391 (but most are deactivated or bots lmao)

amount of sleep: i had a hard time falling asleep and woke up several times during the night so i have no idea but i guess 6h?

lucky number: none because i don’t believe in that but when i was a kid one of those fortune teller machines said that my lucky number is 7 so i always answer that haha

dream job: diversity manager in a public administration

wearing: my PJs (grey shirt and dark green pants with blue leaves) and a white fluffy robe

movies/books that summarise you: oof that’s a hard question. idk, i’m so me i don’t have the faintest idea what i could answer

favourite song: i don’t have one but for the sake of this post i’ll answer wastin'time by the shoes

favourite instrument: the organ. smh. otherwise i’d say it’s a tie btw… well idk, there are too many great instruments ! the piano, guitar, trumpet, washboard, drums, double bass etc etc etc

aesthetic: a fluid mix of vibrant colors, corporate, urban lesbian and soft comfy cotton. if that makes sense.

favourite authors: i’m only gonna answer one bc it’s a tie btw too many others, except for her : claire mazard

favourite animal noise: don’t really have one

random: i really love roaming in cemeteries, even though i don’t do it enough.

As I haven’t done this in a while, I’m gonna tag a shitton of people! But no pressure, you do you : @thasminlove @pia-writes-things @queerwegian @maikanna @niimuue @imthatqueerkid @profiterole-reads @white-caged-bird @chaoticgoodvixen @graindedune @batnbreakfast @iricolor @jupiterianvampire @tracing-rivers @wolfsnape

[moviechef69]

The Yellow Birds Its a military movie. This guy feel guilty after his friend get killed and something awful happens. Now his trying to move on with his life. But the mom of the friemd that hot killed she is still trying to find out what happen to her son. I wish i could tell you this movie is good and had a bunch of action. But its not and the drama is a bit boring. My Rating 2/5

[arcaneviolence]

getting my friend who has never seen the witcher to rate various ships based on vibes alone

F- friend M - me

Up first - Geralt and Jaskier

F- its giving sun and moon- like big sunshine boy here (points at Jaskier) and big grumpy moon stinky man here (points at Geralt)

M - you think hes stinky??

F - yes.

M - why???

F - I sniffed him he is stinky

M- (laughing)

F - he needs a bath smelly boy

M - sunshine boy does bathe him 

F - thats why they are married sunshine boy keeps smelly man clean 

M - sick

F - I bet they’ve explored eachothers bodies

M- skudgsurlghsugkeu

F - I know a little bit based on your posts and I think they are really good friends for a long time so they probably boned at least a few times before romanticaly boning

M - romantic bonning is great but you ever have a pie (quoting a markiplier makes video)

F - (laughing)

Geralt and Yennefer

F - Why are her eyes purple?

M - she part elf

F - why would that make her eyes purple?

M - because genetics 

F - Its cool she seems fruity

M - mmm understandable

F - its serving stars (points to Geralt) and night sky (points to Yen)

M - WAIT SHUT THE FUCK UP THATS SO CUTE

F - and like the sun is a star and his eyes are yellow and the silver hair is silvery stars, and then her hair is black like the nightitme and purple eyes could be like a pretty galaxy

M - YOU SHUT UP NOW THIS IS JUICY

F - he could also be the moon aswell as the stars. She is the night sky that craddles him, the stars and moon, and makes him feel safe. She also provides a good backdrop for him to be seen and heard and admired like he should be.

M - I’m going to shit myself. 

F - I’m a fan of them

F - Bi wife energy

Yennefer and Jaskier

F - SUNSHINE BOY IS BACK AND HES BROUGHT HIS WIFEY

M - do you like sunshine boy?

F - love sunshine boy

M - understandable

F - its like emo gf himbo bf

M - hes actually very smart, he studied poetry and- (F cuts me off)

F - dont care himbo

M - okay

F - he wears hawaiian shirts and always has ice cream and she binge eats chocolate and wear like black silk slip dresses around the house all the time like a sexy rich woman

M - yeah I can see tha- (F cuts me off again)

F - they are like Gonzo and camilla

M - THE MUPPET AND THE CHICKEN??

Yennefer and Triss

F - what is it with this show and sun and moon gay people

M - I think sun and moon ships tend to jsut be inherently gay even if they arnt

F - true

(long puase)

F - they are like buttercups and the wither rose

M - FROM MINECRAFT??

F - yeah

M - how??

F - yellow and black

M - fair enough

Triss and Geralt

F - This feels wrong

M - why?

F - dont like

M - dont like what?

F - I feel like its very unrequited, or its like a ‘parents thought they were cute as kids cause they were friends of the opposite gender and tried to push it, and maybe it worked at one point but it got really uncomfortable’ kinda thing.

M - thats very specific

F - I feel very specific about them.

Eskel and Geralt

F -I like this guy (points to Eskel)

M - yeah?

F - mm hmm. Hes someones scrimblo for shizzle. 

M - fow shizzle. 

F - I feel like they were rivals at one point.

M - really?

F - mmm... actually no they were like reallly close when they were young but drifted apart and now after meeting again old sparks and sparkling again

M - ooooh that sounds like a fanfic waiting to happen

F - i wanna read it gimmi

Lambert and Coen

F - I wanna slap it

M - slap what?

F - (points to coens head)

M - you wanna slap his bald head?

F - I bet the ginger guy spit shines that shit every morning

M - (laughing) 

F - gotta make sure the birds have something to gaze longingly at themselves in

M - (more lauging )

F - The ginger one reminds me of animal

M - what animal?

F - no like the muppet

M - why are you on a muppet spree today

F - love those guys

M - what muppet is the bald one like?

F - jack black

M - HES NOT A MUPPET??

F - BUT HE WAS IN A MUPPET MOVIE!!

M- SO??

if you think I should force them to review more things do tell

[jesusonafrickinboat]

Film Review: The Umbrella Academy

Season 1, Episode 7 “The Day That Was”

One of my projects in Color Theory this semester was called Film Review. The assignment was to pick one or more stills from a movie or TV show and answer five questions about how color was used during the scene(s). I chose the Klaus-centric rave & afterlife scenes from s1 ep7. Honestly, I probably wrote a lot more than actually necessary for the assignment 😂 The black & white except-for-Klaus’-shirt afterlife scene was actually the first thing I thought of when the teacher gave us the assignment, mostly because I’ve been trying to figure it out for 3 years now. Obviously with the new revelation about color in the afterlife, I finally have what I’d call an answer (though I guess could still be labeled as a theory). But! I did this assignment back in April, so these are my observations/theories from then.

Image ID below the read more (due to length)

[Image ID: nine powerpoint slides.

Slide 1: an image of a season 1 title card that is a birds eye of people dressed in black holding black umbrellas, with one holding a blue umbrella that says “The Umbrella Academy” standing in the rain. The slide says “Film Review: The Umbrella Academy. @jesusonafrickinboat”

Slide 2: a season 1 promo image of Viktor, Five, Allison, Luther, Diego, and Klaus. The slide title reads, “1. What film did you chose? When was it made? Who is the director or directors?” The body text reads, “The Umbrella Academy (2019-present) Showrunner: Steve Blackman The Umbrella Academy is a show about a dysfunctional family with superpowers trying to prevent the apocalypse. Sir Reginald Hargreeves adopted seven children at birth from around the world, each with a different power, and gave them numbers for names (Number One through Seven). He trained the kids to be superheroes from a young age. When they were 13 years old, he started sending them on missions to defeat villains as The Umbrella Academy. The siblings all have trauma surrounding their childhoods, mostly stemming from their training and missions.”

Slide 3: a season 1 screenshot of 13 year old Luther, Diego, Allison, Klaus, Five, and Ben lined up in their uniforms after the bank heist. The slide title reads, “1. What film did you chose? When was it made? Who is the director or directors? (cont.)” The body text reads, “I specifically chose film stills from Season 1 Episode 7 ‘The Day That Was’ (2019) Episode director: Stephen Surjik The film stills I chose are from sequential scenes that follow of the siblings, Klaus (Number Four), whose powers have to do with the dead. At this point in the show, he is getting sober after a life of drugs (which dampen his powers). In short: Klaus goes to a nightclub to find one of his brothers and dies after being thrown to the ground, hitting his head on the concrete floor. He goes to the afterlife where he meets God (who doesn’t like him) and talks with his adoptive father. Klaus then comes back to life.”

Slide 4: two season 1 screenshots from the rave scene. The first shows Klaus with Ben behind him and people dancing around them. The second shows Klaus, Luther, and the girl Luther brings home from the rave with people dancing around them. The slide title reads, “2. In this film still, or film stills, what colors do we see? Remember that colors can be described by mentioning three things: value, saturation, and hue.” The body text reads, “In the scene from these film stills, we see mainly red-violet, blue, and yellow-orange-yellow. We also see some amount of blue-violet, violet, red, red-orange, and orange. The colors used in this scene are all very highly saturated. The yellow-orange-yellows have a medium value, and the rest of the colors’ values vary from medium to dark. The characters’ skin colors are bathed in high saturation, medium dark to dark value red-violets and red-oranges. Klaus’ shirt is made up of highly saturated, dark value blues and violets. This is of note because, as seen in the next scene, the real hues are quite different.”

Slide 5: two season 1 screenshots from the afterlife scene. The first shows Klaus and God, a little girl on a bike, Klaus’ shirt is the only thing that still has color. The second shows Klaus looking up at Reginald in the barbershop scene, there is no color in the entire scene. The slide title reads, “2. In this film still, or film stills, what colors do we see? Remember that colors can be described by mentioning three things: value, saturation, and hue.” The body text reads, “In the scene from the first film still, we see mostly grays that vary in value from light to dark. There are three colors present: orange, yellow, and green-blue. All three colors are highly saturated. The orange values vary from dark to medium-light. The yellow values vary from medium to very light. The green-blue values vary from dark to light. In the second half of the afterlife scene, Klaus’ shirt is covered by a black cape, removing all color from the scene. From that point until the end of the scene, there are only achromatic grays with a range of values from dark to light.”

Slide 6: two season 1 screenshots, one from the rave scene, one from the afterlife scene. The first shows Klaus with Ben behind him and people dancing around them. The second shows Klaus and God, a little girl on a bike, Klaus’ shirt is the only thing that still has color. The slide title reads, “3. What kind of palette do we see? Did the filmmaker use a known color scheme, such as monochromatic, analogous, complementary, triadic, tetradic, or split complement? Is there a noted absence of hue? Or has the filmmaker thrown in almost every hue in the rainbow?” The body text reads, “In the scene from the first still, the filmmaker didn’t use a known color scheme. We would call it a ‘Half Wheel’ palette. In the scene from the second film still, there is a noted absence of hue except for Klaus’ shirt, which uses an analogous palette.”

Slide 7: two season 1 screenshots, one from the rave scene, one from the afterlife scene. The first shows Klaus with Ben behind him and people dancing around them. The second shows Klaus and God, a little girl on a bike, Klaus’ shirt is the only thing that still has color. The slide title reads, “4. How is color used? For example, color may be used to direct the eye to something, represent something or someone, create an atmosphere, signal a change, or elicit psychological reactions.” The body text reads, “In the scene from the first film still, the color is used to create an atmosphere. These colors are the type you’d expect to see in a nightclub, and their high saturation lends to an overwhelming atmosphere (which makes sense from a plot standpoint). ​In the scene from the second film still, the color is used to create an atmosphere and elicit psychological reactions. The achromatic grays and analogous colors create a peaceful atmosphere. The psychological reaction comes from the contrast between the nightclub and the afterlife. The abrupt change from vibrant hues to an absence of color may make the viewer feel more relaxed, and signal that this is a peaceful place.​“

Slide 8: two season 1 screenshots from the afterlife scene, taken seconds apart. The first shows Klaus sitting on a chair in the barbershop, looking upwards, his shirt is the only thing with color. The second shows Klaus sitting on a chair in the barbershop, his gaze moved downwards, covered by a black hairdresser’s cape, with Reginald partially seen in the background. The slide title reads, “4. How is color used?” The body text reads, “While these stills are from the same scene as the previous afterlife stills, this particular use of color ties into the characters and plot. The afterlife color scheme remains the same until the first still. However, from the second still until Klaus is revived, the absence of color envelops the entire frame.​ The first thing Reginald does when he enters the scene is cover Klaus’ shirt, effectively removing the color from the scene. I believe this represents Klaus’ relationship with his adoptive father. In the show, Reginald is an antagonistic figure to Klaus and his siblings – they weren’t allowed to just be children, and he never allowed freedom or individuality. By covering Klaus’ shirt, Reginald removes Klaus’ individuality and takes control of the scene. ​After removing the color, the atmosphere of the scene goes from peaceful to sorrowful (this is also reflected in Klaus’ change of facial expressions between film stills).”

Slide 9: two season 1 screenshots, one from the rave scene, one from the afterlife scene. The first shows Klaus with Ben behind him and people dancing around them. The second shows Klaus and God, a little girl on a bike, Klaus’ shirt is the only thing that still has color. The slide title reads, “5. How does color work with the other elements of the film? For example, do the colors seem to work in harmony with the sound and action? Or do color choices seem intentionally incongruous?” The body text reads, “In the scene from the first still, the colors work in harmony with the sound and action. People move chaotically around the club to very loud electronic dance music, which works together with the high saturation colors. As Klaus, an addict in the midst of getting sober, walks through the nightclub filled with dancing and drugs, the atmosphere is overwhelming. The colors, sound, and action are working in harmony against Klaus, whose actions are incongruous with the other elements. ​Throughout the scene in the afterlife, an accordion song plays. It gives the afterlife a peaceful, old-timey feel. Compared to the nightclub, Klaus is more relaxed and at peace during the first half of the afterlife scene. The colors work in harmony with the sounds and actions.” /End ID]

[trulyinspiringmovies]

Wolfwalkers

“Wolfwalkers” should be watched by more people because it is a wonderful experience visually, musically, and narratively.

Robyn and her father, Bill Goodfellowe, lived together in Ireland in 1650. In their town, Kilkenny, the people feud against the wolves of the forest. One day, Robyn decides to secretly follow his father while he’s out hunting for wolves. When Robyn’s pet bird, Merlyn, gets injured, Robyn meets a girl named, Mebh. Mebh lives in the forest as a Wolfwalker.

This was a great movie to start my year off with. I’ve heard from the grapevine that this movie was something special, but I kept putting it off. I’m glad I decided to finally check it out since this movie is an experience that absolutely blew me away. It’s just a shame that I know this movie isn’t going to get the recognition it deserves. Hopefully, writing this review will inspire at least one person out there in the world to give this movie a chance. Right off the bat, the biggest thing about this movie is its amazing art style. To me, the art style of “Wolfwalkers” is akin to cartoons I grew up with like the works of Craig McCracken and Genndy Tartakovsky. It’s immediately nostalgic, but with a twist. The decision to keep the remnants of pencil test animation adds fluidity to the characters' motion while helping the entire movie stand out visually. If you’ve ever transitioned a drawing from a rough sketch to the final product, then you know that there’s an element of charm that is lost through the process. “Wolfwalkers” opted to keep that charm alive and I’m glad it did. The music is extremely atmospheric in this movie. The score paints the forest like a place I could live in forever. It truly elevates the vibrant drawings of trees and vegetation into a setting that truly feels like the magic of nature is alive. The magic in this world is handled beautifully. This movie somehow manages to showcase astral projecting spirit animals in a unique and clear way. The use of color is striking, both in the purposely dull town and vibrant forest. The forest has beautiful greens and yellows during the daytime and deep blues and rich blacks during the night. Meanwhile, the town is purposefully dull and washed in sharp crimsons during times of high tension. The town has this rigid look to it because it’s built with lots of angled shapes while the forest is filled with cascading vines and waves of trees. This film also plays with aspect ratio in a way that didn’t piss me off. Usually, I get upset when a movie frequently changes its aspect ratio just to make a scene artificially cinematic. In this movie, the aspect ratio is a powerful storytelling tool. It’s directly tied to the emotional state of the characters, closing in whenever tunnel-visioning due to blind fury. It’s never a sharp switch from one shot to another, saving me from experiencing visual whiplash. Instead, it slowly creeps in with boiling lines, further adding to this movie’s clear visual style. To top all of this off, the story is genuine. The bond between Robyn and Mebh felt so real that it touched my heart. This movie can be heartbreaking when it wants to be, so having the characters come out of the story safe and sound was something I was emotionally invested in. Please go check this movie out if you already haven’t. This movie has inspired me to check out all of the other Cartoon Saloon movies. I cannot wait to review all of those films as well.

★★★★★

Watched on January 1st, 2022