#YOU FUCKING BAFOON

[ratzhatz14]

Cosprout ?

Cosmo... Do not DARE move A SINGLE INCH. The bomb on your lap could risk ALL LIFE ON EARTH TO GO EXTINCT.

The fate of everytoon is in your hands.

[accultant]

munday funday

i forgot i had to go to the grocery store after the event i was dressed for so I was shopping for work potluck ingredients looking like this. I did get stopped and politely asked "may I ask you a question? why are you clownin?"

[skuntank]

Diantha? Straight?? HA

[tamagotchikgs]

it took me way too long to realize u can just double click nails in sims 4 cas to apply it to the rest of a sim’s outfits

[rigginsstreet]

“Why didn’t everyone latch onto kali”

Maybe because she only had one episode essentially. Maybe that has something to do with it idk

[baileyboo2016]

omg auto cutout works SO well in PicCollage guys just look at how great this is 🥰😌✨

[sunlitmcgee]

it is the year of our lord 2023, if you still cannot separate minecraft ocs from real people then just....Fuck off

[dogearedfriends]

actually, if someone who's entire job description is providing you with accommodations for your disability refuses to do so, you should be allowed to commit at least one unspeakable act against them. one per infraction, maybe

[ditzybat]

damian: you bumbling bafoon! never in my life have i met such a -

jason: big words considering i fucked your mom.

dick: YOU DID WHAT?!

jason: oops

[halohamilton]

like I have to laugh.... 😭

[asgardiansofthegalaxyvol3]

I was a fool. An absolute bafoon. Deadpool and Wolverine 2: the musical starts with a montage of their daily life to the soundtrack of Accidentally in Love (from shrek) to WADE falling in love with Logan, not the other way around, because honestly who better than Deadpool? He can girlishly kick his feet and smile sweetly to the camera and (badly) play it off when Logan is actually looking at him. And it’s just them being domestic. Logan cooking, Wade sneaking glances throughout the day, can even have them fighting something together. And of course it ends with them platonically sharing a bed and you can see Wade wanting to reach out to Logan but he doesn’t, just goes to sleep instead.

And one way or another they’re fighting some big bad magical being, and honestly Marvel it doesn’t really matter who you pick. All they need is to be able to use magic and get pissed that 1-Wade can’t die and 2- he never shuts the HELL up. And bam, instant curse. The entire world is a musical and Deadpool has to suffer the consequences (being annoyed by the constant noise of everyone singing)

Except he LOVES it. He walks down the street and hears someone singing about cheating on their spouse, someone singing about how they miss their dog at home, and someone getting increasingly angry about traffic through the open window of their car. And the icing on the cake is that his roommate, THE Hugh Jackman is cursed too. Since y’all wanna make him be the Wolverine until he’s 90 you can at least throw him a bone and let him sing again, it’s what he was made to do. And since Ryan can’t/wont/doesn’t like to sing it gives him the opportunity not to, plus it has comedic effect if he’s bland and boring, making comments through everyone’s songs. Social commentary on people’s rhymes/pitch/beats. The potential is limitless. They should also have multiple people who are just genuinely bad singers, because that’s just how the real world works.

And by the third act Wade has had enough of the singing. “Can everyone shut the fuck up for five minutes PLEASE. Not you, Logan, you have the voice of an angel, please keep going.”

And since Disney owns them now they can have a scene of Logan singing ‘i won’t say I’m in Love’ from Hercules with Ellie, Yukio, and Blind Al as the muses because surprise surprise the main story is Wade trying to undo this Musical curse but the subplot is Wade and Logan both being in love with each other but both being too emotionally constipated and unaware to make a move on each other. And you know what, if the power of hand holding and gay love could save the day last time, maybe it can do it again this time. I’m thinking something cheesy like an off key duet between Wade and Logan that ends in a kiss, but I’ve never been great at endings so I’ll leave it up to Ryan.

And bam @vancityreynolds I’ve got the outline of your new movie right here. I’ll accept payment in the form of one meet and greet with you and Hugh where I can take a picture of you guys holding my Toddler so I can frame it, hang it on the wall, and ask her for the rest of her life how she could possibly not remember something that happened when she was under 2 years old.

[objectum-sunshine]

m*t p*t is wrong and dumb and cringe for many reasons but he's so wrong SO WRONG about the portal companion cube. the dumb fuck. the utter bafoon. They do not SING because they have a DEAD BODY inside of them, you little twerp. they SING because THEY LOVE YOU. and THEY SCREAM WHEN YOU THROW THEM INTO THE EMANCIPATION GRILL BECAUSE IT HURTS. IT HURTS TO BE DESTROYED BY SOMEONE YOU LOVE. all the cubes scream because they are so so so small and glados is so big and everywhere and they are just as trapped and scared of her as you. My god . why is it so hard to understand this???

[lifea16]

Inspiration struck, gotta write more incorrect quotes

Blitz: If bread in French is pain, then I own a fucking bakery! ------ Stolas: Darling, would you happen to know what time it is currently? Blitz: No, pass me the saxophone and we'll find out Blitz plays the saxophone very loudly and out of tune Moxxie: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT 4 IN THE MORNING?! Blitz: It's 4am ------ Blitz: I don’t think the therapist is supposed to say ‘wow’ that many times during their first session with a client, but here we are. ------ Stolas: *handing Blitz a coffee* Here, have a nice hot cup of coffee Blitz: It's cold Stolas: A nice cup of coffee Blitz: This is fucking awful! Stolas: A cup of coffee Blitz: I don't think this is even coffee Stolas: A cup ------ Blitz: What's a word that's a mix between happy and sad? Moxxie: Malcontented, Disgruntled, Miserable, Desolated,.. Millie: Smad! ----- Blitz: Sorry I can’t be emotionally vulnerable with you it’d ruin the mystery. ----- Moxxie: Life is like a cookie.. Millie: It's sweet and you should savor it! Blitz: It crumbles apart..? *Moxxie and Millie just stare at Blitz, incredibly concerned* ------ Octavia: Why are we all arguing over top or bottom?! Just be happy you got a bunk bed you bafoons! Blitz: Do we tell her? Stolas: No, absolutely not ------ Moxxie: Where’s Blitz? Millie: Around. Moxxie: Around? Loona: You don’t have any idea, do you? Blitz, dropping down from above: Did you know there’s a space above the ceiling? -----

[strniohoeee]

idk what to ask but something super angst enemies to lovers with matt

Disregard(Matt’s Version)

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: Matt and Y/N hate each other. However one night at a party things take an ugly turn, and Matt’s there to help her. Feelings are expressed but are these feelings mutual? 🌷

Warning⚠️: None really some guy tries to take advantage of reader.

Song for the imagine: R U Mine?- Arctic Monkeys

And satisfaction feels like a distant memory

And I can’t help myself

All I ever wanna say is “are you mine?”

“You at a party with Matt? How’s that going to work” my friend asked me over the phone laughing

“It’s going to work because I hate him, and I will be far away from him duhh” I said raking through my closet looking for an outfit

“I just don’t know how you can hang out with him and his brothers when yall can’t stand one another” she said

“Well Nicks my friend mostly sadly and Chris is cool, but Matt’s just always there” I said huffing when I couldn’t find the shirt I wanted

“Why don’t you and Nick just hang out” she responded

“I mean we have, but they are always together. I’ve learned to just not acknowledge him” I said laughing

“Man I don’t know how you’ve been sticking it out this long” she said to me

“He was at his worse in high school, so if I got over that I can get over anything” I responded back

“Mmm that’s true he was an annoying little shit” she said giggling

“He really was, and he was such a dick” I said rolling my eyes

“He was, but I’m gonna let you go girl. I know you have to prepare for this party, and I’m about to head out with my man on a date” she said to me

“Alright girl I love you, and have fun I’ll talk to you soon” I responded

“Love you too, and have fun as well” she responded

I hung up and finished looking through my closet for another outfit.

“FINALLYYYY” I said as I found the shirt I’ve been hunting for

To be honest I’m not too sure why my hate for Matt was still there. I’ve been friends with Nick for 5 years now, and although Matt was an asshole in school I couldn’t stop my hate towards him.

He just was always there, and swore he was hot shit. He wanted to be cool and mysterious so badly and it annoyed the shit out of me.

I agreed when Chris called him “tough” because it was true. He acted like this big bad guy, and like he was too good for everybody. Hated it and I hated him

Initially I really liked him, but he destroyed all of that when we were in high school. It haunted me daily…..man fuck Matt

I finished getting ready and decided to Uber over to the triplets house since Nick wanted us to carpool

I headed into their house and walked up to nicks room

“Nickkkk” I said as I walked in and hugged him

“Heyyy” he said pulling away

“Excited for tonight?” I asked him as I sat on his bed

“Very! I haven’t been to a party in a while” he said looking in his closet

“Oh my gosh sameeee” I said

“Should I wear a pink shirt or a black shirt?” He asked

“Mmmmm pink, that color looks good on you” I said back

“I was thinking the same” he said laughing

Suddenly Chris and Matt barged into his room

“YOOO” Chris yelled coming in

“Hey” I said smiling at him

“Stop fucking screaming like a bafoon” Nick said

“Uhhh who brought the negative Nancy” Chris said rolling his eyes

Nick just rolled his eyes at Chris as he finished getting ready in his bathroom

“Nick I have a question” I said getting up

“What’s up?” He asked

“Do you have my perfume I left here a while back” I asked

“Mmm I should, might be in my top drawer” he said

“Yeah you might want to mask that smell” Matt said laughing

“Ew….youre not funny” I said giving him a dirty look

“Yeah and youre ugly” he said making an ugly face

“You act like a two year old” I said not even looking at him

“Alright children enough” Chris said rolling his eyes

“I’m going to wait downstairs, I’m not going to allow Matt to ruin my night” I said after I sprayed myself with perfume and leaving Nicks room

About 10 minutes later they all came down and we decided to head out. Matt drove us to this influencers house who they knew and we headed in

“Alright guys don’t get too wild and try not to fight anyone” Nick said

“Got it” we said laughing

We walked in and started to say hi to the people we knew. I headed into the kitchen to make myself a drink because this was going to be a long night.

I was sitting in the kitchen sipping on my drink while people watching when I saw someone from the corner of my eye.

“Hey” he said, I looked over at him smiling as I swallowed my drink

“Hi” I said properly

“I’m Grey, but most people call me G” he said sticking his hand out for me to shake

“I’m Y/N” I said shaking his hand

“Are you here alone?” He asked as he began to make himself a drink

“Oh no I’m here with some friends, but we branched off” I said to him

“Oh nice yeah I did the same. I think my friends with some girl or some shit” he said shaking his head

“Ahh yes the classic party hook up” I said

“So cliche right” he said laughing

I went to answer but Matt walked into the kitchen clearing his throat and shoving in between us to get a Pepsi

“Oh uh am I interrupting something?” Matt asked looking between Grey and I

“No, go away Matt” I said sighing

“Cant I get a drink?” He said cheering my cup and giving me a shit eating grin

“I’m going to uhhh I’m going to head out” Grey said before walking off

“You fucking dick” I said punching Matt

“I came to get a drink” he said shrugging his shoulders

“You’re such a fucking asshole I hate you” I said finishing my drink and going to make another one

“Not sure why you hate me” he said scoffing

“Tuh- you’re not sure?” I said grabbing a coke to mix with Malibu

“Mmm no not really” he said shaking his head

“Oh well let me jog your memory shall I? You were an absolute piece of shit in high school. You called me every terrible name under the sun. You turned our whole grade against me. Let’s not forget that so-called prank you pulled on me. Calling me telling me you liked me when you knew I liked you asking me out and then telling me it was a joke and that you truly hated me. Oh not to mention you recorded it and sent it to the whole fucking school. You humiliated me in front of everyone” I said mixing my drink

“It wasn’t that serious, you know. I was hanging around asshole guys and I thought it was cool” he said nonchalantly

“You’re still the same way though” I said scoffing

“I’m really not” he said

“You are Matt….you are. I don’t know what I ever did to you, but I know I don’t deserve this shit” I responded

“Oh don’t act innocent you weren’t a saint” he said

“Yeah maybe in high school I got you back a few times but nothing compared to the shit you out, and that was high school were 21 now” I responded

“I have my reasons and you have yours” he said

I looked at him and scoffed…what is he even saying

“Grow up Matt” I said lifting off the counter to walk away

“Right back at you” he said shaking his head

“And stay the fuck out of my way” I said shoving past him

I walked off angrily and decided to look for Grey because I really needed to take my mind off of Matt. He was making my blood boil and my head spin

I saw Grey sitting on a couch scrolling through his phone

“Hey stranger” I said walking up to him

“Oh Heyy Y/N” he said smiling and locking his phone to put it away

“Sorry about that back there he can be a bit annoying” I said sitting next to him

“Ex boyfriend drama?” He asked

“Oh god no. Rival since high school” I said laughing

“Damn since high school” he said

“Yeah” I responded taking a seat next to him

Grey and I had been talking on the couch for a while. His fingers and hands often becoming loose and touching me. Nothing that made me uncomfortable, but it was certainly strange.

Unbeknown to Y/N Matt was watching her and Grey the whole time. He had a weird feeling about him, but couldn’t put his finger on it. He didn’t like that Grey was touching her, but she didn’t seem bothered so he stood back.

“Hey want to head up to a room I can’t really hear you” Grey asked nicely

“Ummm yeah sure” I said

“Nothing weird I promise” he said laughing

“Oh no worries” I said laughing and getting up to follow him

Matt was sitting as he watched them get up and head to the stairs. His ears perking up at this…..something was telling him to follow them.

Slowly Matt got up following behind them at a good distance. Listening in on their convo as best as he could. Didn’t seem strange, but he still wanted to make sure Y/N was okay.

Grey and Y/N had walked into a room shutting the door behind them, and Matt stood a few feet behind. He didn’t want to listen in, but he also wanted to make sure nothing weird was about to go down

“So tell me more about you” Grey said as we both sat on the bed

“Mmm well I’ve been living here for a while now, I’m originally from Boston” I said scanning my brain for more things to say

“Nice nice” he said staring at me

“I’m not sure what else to say” I said giggling

But Grey didn’t say anything he just stared at me….it started to bother me

“Is there something on my face?” I asked getting nervous

“Oh uh no sorry you’re just gorgeous” he said

“Oh thank you” I said looking down

At first coming up here seemed like a good idea, but now I’m worried he got the wrong picture. I did not want anything to do with this man other than a possible friendship. This was started to bug me out

Suddenly he started to lean in, I jumped up

“Oh no no that’s not why I came up here” I said backing away

“Oh? Well then why did you come up here” he asked shocked

“Umm because I thought you wanted to hear me better not try to kiss me” I said looking at him weirdly

“Well one kiss wouldn’t hurt” he said getting up

“No I’m good” I said nodding my head at him

“Just one come on” he said in a sleazy way

“And I said no. No is a full sentence” I said getting upset

“Stop being a tease already” he said

“I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong idea, but I do not want to kiss you” I said

He came closer and I backed away banging into a table against the wall

“Back away” I said

On the other side Matt heard the muffled conversations and the scuffling going on between two people, but he didn’t know what was going on.

“Please stop” I said pushing him off of me as we struggled against the table causing some things to fall

“Come on baby” he said getting upset

“FUCK OFF” I yelled pushing him off and grabbing the front door

My eyes surprised me when I made eye contact with Matt who was standing infront of the door

“Matt?” I asked confused

“What’s going on?” He said looking behind me into the room

“Nothing” I said pushing him back trying to get him to leave

“Your little bitch is a tease” Grey said to Matt

“She’s not a bitch, and if she said no then it’s no” Matt said looking the dude up and down

“She doesn’t want you either, so don’t try to be Superman” he said scoffing

“Fuck you. I’m being a decent human being respect her” Matt said

“What are you going to do about huh?” He said laughing at Matt

“Come on stop” I said trying to pull Matt away

“No” he said pushing my hand away

“You’re a piece of shit” Matt said walking towards Grey

“Don’t care” he said still laughing

Matt looked at him before punching him in the jaw

“MATT WHAT THE FUCK” I yelled out

They both started to scuffle around throwing punches

“Stop it” I said trying to pull Matt away

Matt hit the guy again in the nose causing him to stumble backwards

“When a woman tells you no that means no” he said backing away from Grey

“Matt we have to go now” I said pulling him away

Matt and I ran down the stairs and to his car

“Are you okay?” He asked me as we got in the car

“Yeah I’m fine” I said bluntly

“What a sick fuck” he said turning his car on

“Why do you care?” I asked

“Well I got a bad vibe from him okay, and I just didn’t want you to get hurt” he said as he pulled off

“Matt caring about me” I asked

“I don’t care about you…..I just didn’t want some creep to take advantage” he said scoffing

“Mm don’t care about me sureeeee” I said sitting back in my chair

“I don’t fucking like you okay Y/N” he said getting upset

“Feelings mutual I could’ve handled my own” I said

“Didn’t seem like it” he said

“I had it” I said getting upset with him

“You’re so stubborn” he said

“And so are you” I said

“Just stop okay” he said gripping the steering wheel tighter

“Stop what? Just take me home and shut up” I said rolling my eyes

“You’re such a bitch I try and help you and this is what I get” he said

“Stop the car” I said bluntly

“No” he said

“Matthew stop the fucking car now” I said

Matt looked over at me and pulled over. I hopped out and began to walk

“What the fuck are you doing?” He asked

“Shut the fuck up” I said continuing to walk

Matt hopped out the car following behind me

“Get in the car now” he said sternly

“You’re not my dad, go away” I said shooing him

“I’m not asking you again. Get in the car now” he said trailing closer to me

“GO AWAY” I yelled at him

Matt ran a little faster and grabbed my arm pulling me to turn around

“IM NOT LEAVING YOU HERE STOP BEING STUBBORN AND GET IN THE CAR” he yelled at me

“Let go of me” I said pulling my arm away from him harshly

“Get in the car. I know you hate me. I get that, but get in the car. I’ll take you home and I’ll never bother you again” he said

“Matt no I’m not going anywhere with you” I said

“Stop being so stubborn holy shit” he said pulling at his hair

“No one told you to save me, no one told you to take me home and no one told you to follow me out here. You don’t like me so go away” I said turning around to keep walking

“Yeah I don’t like you because…..because I love you” he said

I stopped in my tracks and slowly turned around to face him

“What?” I asked

“I love you okay” he said shaking his head

“No no you’re not doing this. After all these years of being a piece of shit you’re not about to pull this I love you card” I said pointing at him

“I’ve been a horrible person I know, but I truly didn’t know how to express myself. And i know these words probably mean nothing. But I want you to know I can’t do this anymore. I can’t hide my true feelings by pretending to be mean to you. When I saw you and that guy I got so jealous because that….that should be me” he said

“I don’t know what to say to you” I said shaking my head

“That’s okay. Just get back in the car, let me take you home. And you don’t have to see me ever again” he responded

“Matt I… I don’t know what to say because I love you too. I have loved you since high school, and I masked these feelings with hatred because it was the easiest thing to do” I said

“I’m sorry, okay. I never meant to hurt you the way I did” he said

“I don’t know if I can accept that apology right now. You hurt me badly” I told him

“I get that, but just let me take you home and we can talk about it tomorrow” he said

“Ok” I responded in a whisper

I got back into Matt’s car and he drove me home. The whole ride was silent. My thoughts racing in my head about what he told me….did he really love me?

Matt got to my apartment complex and walked me to my apartment door

“Thanks Matt” I said looking at him

“Oh yeah no worries can’t have you walking alone at night” he said

“No. I mean for everything tonight thank you” I said smiling

“Oh yeah. Of course” he said smiling back

“Ummm I really like you, and you did hurt me, but I want to work this out” I said

“Yeah yeah I do too” he said looking at my eyes

“Well goodnight Matt” I responded opening my door

“Can I have a hug?” He asked shyly

I smiled at this and pulled him in for a hug, kissing him on the cheek

“I appreciate you truly for tonight” I said smiling weakly

He nodded his head at me

“I’ll call” he said

“I’ll answer” I responded

And with that I walked into my apartment locking the door behind me.

Matt drove back to pick up his brothers. Once he was home he laid in bed smiling to himself.

I can’t wait to hear her voice again.

The End

I hope you enjoyed this one I love yall sooo much omgg🥹🖤🖤

-J💅🏽

[murasaki-cha]

A little book rant! I love dual pov in romance books! I love them so so so much!!

And I especially love them when there's a closed off love interest who doesn't really emote much!

Because we go to character A (main character) and we see things from their perspective. They might do something stupid. They might be doing the most normal thing ever. They might be doing something very romantic. Heck they might be just breathing. And they look at character B and they're just standing there looking blankly, or looking grumpy, at most they might have a small smile.

AND THAN WE GET TO CHARACTER B POV!! AND THEY ARE JUST SCREAMING ON THE INSIDE!! LIKE THEY ARE GOING AKSKLDKSNSLDKNSKSPSNSKSOKS! They are in fact this close👌 to crying because of the feelings character A is making them feel.

I go feral over this!!

If I have to give some excamples

I would say one of the greatest moments in my existence was when I was reading Assistant To The Villain and Evie kissed Trystan AND THAN IMMEDIATELY we jumped to Trystan's pov! I almost cried ngl. I freaking screamed for 3 minutes straight (on the inside because I was in public). Honestly it was hilarious going to Evie's pov and she's all "Oh my god I would kill for him, I can't let him figure me out" and than we go to Trystan's and he's all "Crap I'd kill for her I can't let her figure me out".

Wes isn't the type of love interest I described but the extra chapters from Better Than The Movies that were from his pov (The party, Liz's proposal, Basketball Night and their road trip chapters) might have completed my entire life. Might have been the missing piece of my soul. Might have given me a new purpose for living. Might have rewired my brain. Just might have.

A Thousand Heartbeats by Kiera Cass made me experience all the emotions THEY JUST LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH THOSE FREAKING IDIOTS!!

*punching a wall* AARON! FUCKING! WARNER'S! POV! CHAPTERS!!!!

I'm reading the Shepherd King duology and book 2, Two Twisted Crowns has 3 pov but 2 of those are between the main character and her love interest in the first book so it counts (also this series is amazing please read it!!!)

I rescently read The Brightest Light of Sunshine by Lisina Coney, NA romance with an age gap, and it was so so cute and touching and when you read their povs you could tell they both were in love with each other from the begining but they were too stubborn to admit it to themselves! Again the love interest isn't really the type that I described but still they're idiots and he constantly fangirls over her so yeah.

Butcher and Blackbird gets a special mention because I love them! Idiots! Bafoons! Dumbasses in love! Both of them just go asjjskdjdd over each other tho so into the list it goes. God I'm eating this audiobook up like Rowan ate that beef niçoise (iykyk)!!!

Some very specific NA hockey player books and book series. I have needs.

I have to mention Defy The Night, I have to. I have yet to finish Defend The Dawn so shush don't tell me anything. Though I loved the dual pov there less about the romance and more when it came to presenting the current situation of the kingdom from both perspectives of the Royals and the Wilds. So it doesn't really fit with what this post is about but I just wanted to mention it because I really liked this book

And if I had to pick one book that I wish would have a dual pov...... Red White And Royal Blue. Even if Henry's inner monologue would have been a long string of "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKK I'M SO GAY I'M SO SO SO BLOODY GAY!!!!!". I'd pay good money for that actually

[kyamiia]

yes i’m salty and mad bc why don’t i see hate of Shinjuro as much as Sanemi ? because if we back track, wasnt he verbally abusive to Rengoku and Senjuro AND even physically abusive to Senjuro ? bad mouthing his dead son about how he didn’t do a good job and never turning his head to look at the great achievements he’s made and also drinking himself and turning violent towards a fucking 12/13 year old ? oh but it’s okay because he’s a dilf? because he’s hot ? but when SANEMI does it, regardless of blind rage, suddenly he’s gonna be like his father and die and he’s a jerk ? the double standards are INSANE because y’all pick and choose who to flutter your eyelashes at.

By no means am i defending Sanemi in his actions but y’all are for sure hypocrites because once you see Rengoku’s father doing it, for no apparent reason other than alcoholism and grief, it’s okay because y’all like dilfs. Get a grip you bumbling bafoons before you cherry pick what is and what isn’t a bad character.