#YES I'M STILL HERE OK???
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No you don't UNDERSTAND the only difference in the flannel is a white strip.
#PLUS the s5 shirt is from s2 & s4#I'm like 90% sure the jacket is a replica though#... yes I have his outfits memorized don't worry about it#YES I'M STILL HERE OK???#but also like did the set designers lose the og after s4? Bc it's on Nancy's bed#jonathan byers#stranger things#st 5
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kay oh bee dee
#arting#transformers#kobd#knockout#breakdown#megatron and starscream are also here but this ain't about them...#idk if i like my breakdown human ver but whaaaatever...#i was pretty set with knockout.... hmm hmm#I AM STILL PISSED AT THE CHARACTER DEVELOPEMENT FOR KNOCKOUT BTW... like 😭#also with breakdown's death 😭😭😭😭😭 aagagahahahhhh whhyyyyyyyyyy#i'm not even pissed actually he died but the way knockout reacts to it is like 😭 ok. sure. call him your partner and shit and you dgaf 😭#like. ok at first i was like ''ooh he is trying to ignore it but later they will show his reaction to it!''#THEY DON'T!!?!?!?!? it's just ah yes.. my fellow comrade died... oh welll i will avenge him! 😭😭😭😭 fucj you#it pisses me off especially arcee gets multiple moments remembering cliffjumper and tailgate#you know... her previous partners? yeah..#i understand budget stuff and shit but come on... you could've done more with knockout? idk...#i heard bd was supposed to become an autobot which is so cool but they didn't do it due to budget stuff. kms....#😭😭😭😭😭#idk they just had so much potential and they threw it down the drain..#man even dreadwing had a similar motivation of avenging with his dead brother 😭#ok... anywya yaaaaa 😭
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What did/do you like about Pharah?
Uh, gameplay-wise, I really love characters in shooters who rely on three-dimensional movement techs. Chaining together hover and jump to stay in the air for as long as possible and keep momentum is so satisfying, and picking enemies off from the sky made me feel like a bird of prey. I was a good Pharah main.
Story-wise, there unfortunately isn't much to canonically go off because Pharah is so underutilized and neglected. Her personality's pretty boilerplate "heroic hero" (she's literally inspired by Captain America).
But it's the crumbs/bits and pieces that I really latched onto. Pharah's a confirmed lesbian; her short story with Baptiste implies she harbors a crush on Mercy (fucking thank you.). She's biracial Egyptian/First Nations. She has major mommy issues, having grown up both admiring and resenting Ana. She's the bridge between Old Overwatch, inspired by the idealized heroes who surrounded her childhood, and New Overwatch. She's one of the only inter-generational characters in the cast; someone whose experiences span the gap, which is why I seriously believe Pharah would make a great main character.
There isn't much to go off of, though; she's a very uncomplicated character (she's a soldier for a private military corporation, lol.). But that just means she's a blank slate character, so I've seen fanfic writers run wild and create some really interesting takes on her. My favorite interpretation of her's a dense, herbo gym-bro type (a lot of her liens are about work outs, exercising, and playing sports) who's easily excitable under her seemingly self-serious, armored visage. We see how she tends to gloat and hype herself up when she's on a streak too, so Pharah definitely has a competitive and boastful side under her more professional and militant performance.
Now Mercy? Mercy is a real complex character.
#i was a diehard pharmercy shipper back then btw#the inherent homoerotic experience of pharmercy gameplay.#the homoerotic experience of looking to the skies to fly to safety under the protection of your knight in shining armor#the homoerotic experience of feeling white hot murderous rage at an enemy trying to pick off your pocket mercy#i still kinda despise gency lmao. you cannot convince me mercy would be in love with genji. at all.#he'd make her feel so uncomfortable and guilty. in my head. the canon is obviously different#gency is sexless. absolutely zero bite or tension.#i could go on about mercy and how her character has so much missed potential#i'm no longer in my overwatch fandom phase but#i still think about that new flirty line they added in ow2 where mercy goes “ahh you're like my knight in shining armor!”#and pharah goes “that's what i'm goin for ;)” and i sigh dreamily#really happy that pharah outright says she's a lesbian too but it's hard to feel good about rep when you know blizzard uses it for pr#to be honest i'm willing to bet cash that blizzard's keeping pharmercy in their back pocket as ammo for the next controversy#last year we already saw logs about pharah fretting and taking care of mercy and the two talking about how good it is to see each other#tbh pharah has the same energy/demeanor as applejack. cheerful and competitive in a can of whoopass#but yeah overall pharah's a pretty shallow character. i have IDEAS on how i'd go about deepening her but. whatever#that's sorta what happens when you have to juggle a cast of 40 characters. a lot get left with the bare minimum#ok so i wrote this entire post up saying that pharah isn't in ow2's storymode when she is. she's in the story i just. forgot#because she doesn't do or contribute anything interesting#ok i'm stopping here. overwatch's story is such an interesting narrative mess i could go on for hours#i dunno how you come up with such incredible character designs and give them such an unincredible story#it's also so so so interesting seeing the conflicting takes on characters the writers have#mercy in gameplay and voicelines is peppy and cheerful and optimistic#but mercy in the storymode journal logs is tired. jaded. a total shut in who forgets to leave her room and social#and YES! THAT'S WHAT I WANT!!! THAT'S MERCY TO ME!!! THE DOCTOR WHO FORGETS TO TAKE CARE OF HERSELF#ask me#anon
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yknow what else abt s4 i had forgotten until i was going back to the transcripts for caps?
ARTHUR: [...] And I’ve been failing you lately, as well. I’m… I’m seeing that. Is that why you’ve been slipping away? Is that why you can’t see certain things? With Yellow, I was so… poor at shaping him, I was… I was so angry with him. I made him… feel small. Is it me that’s causing you to fail? Is it my lack of trust?
neither of them know what's wrong with john yet but it's obvious that something is wrong, and part of what arthur says to him at the farm is fear that it's his fault somehow. he can tell, and has been able to tell since addison, that something is up with him (this bizarre insistence on the order, the immediate shutdown of certain subjects, the prickliness at random times), but he's missing such a fundamental piece of the puzzle that john is standing there lying to his fucking face and arthur's like, maybe the problem is i'm not trusting him enough.
which is an echo of a similar sentiment from the nightmare, actually-
KELLIN: He’s lying about something. Is it Kayne? What isn’t he telling you? ARTHUR: I don’t know! KELLIN: Or maybe… just maybe… he’s slipping away. ARTHUR: What? [...] KELLIN: Yellow. The King. John. Three separate entities. ARTHUR: Yellow is the King. KELLIN: Is he? If he was trapped inside of you, he’s clearly no longer a whole! And look at what you did to that. ARTHUR: What I did? KELLIN/OTHER ARTHUR: What you ruined. (Whispers start to rise again.) You can hate me for saying this… [...] But I’m only saying what you’re saying to yourself, Arthur. Something is off about John. You know it. Because I know it.
i feel like since john got so defensive of yellow so quickly arthur keeps circling back to that sentiment every time he thinks about whatever's going on now. like all of the talk abt "failing" is just a distorted, reapplied version of what john has said abt yellow. he's so certain it's his fault somehow.
and part of that is probably just the Guilt™ but i feel like part of it is also, like, if it's his fault then he can fix it. if this is a repeat of what he fucked up with yellow, then he can course-correct and bring him back. if it's out of his control... then he's going to lose him, and there's nothing he can do about it. of those two options, of course he'd choose the first one every time.
meanwhile john's just watching arthur assemble all these unrelated clues into this disastrous tower of lies like Well Well, If It Isn't The Consequences Of My Actions,
#the nemesis speaks#mv liveblog#malevanalysis#part 38 the tear my beloved... i will defend u until i die. that ep went craaaazy#they were both so goddamn SCARED. that whole fucking season.#at that point in their progression where they're like ''i'm absolutely sure i love you and can't bear losing you''#''but i DON'T know if you feel the same way. and that terrifies me.''#i feel like i was going to make a bigger point with this post initially but now i don't remember what it was. it's late i'm sleepy#i'm also still feeling so unwell abt how fast arthur flips the switch from ''wtf is WRONG with you'' into ''ok so we ditch oscar''#as soon as john actually uses his words. like arthur's rightfully pissed up until john says YES I DON'T WANT HIM HERE#and arthur's like okay! he's gone! what else!#i just . hkjhkjhhgmgmf. god. normal healthy friendship behavior.
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The desire to draw these two again but without the motivation to make something more than one of these little charts (oops)
Thank you Valc0 for making the sheet!
#I still need to play the epilogue#and draw things from the epilogue#and anSWER SOME OF THE QUESTIONS IN MY INBOX BAREEE IF YOU'RE READING THIS I'LL GET TO IT I PROMISE#IF YOU REMEMBER WHAT YOU ASKED THE SHORT ANSWER IS YES THE LONG ANSWER IS IT'S COMPLICATED haha#& then also make fanart of other tavs I've got a backlog of inspiration but commissions and the elden ring DLC are just RIGHT in front of m#What else can I ramble about in here#The way I had to look up all the stupid woods around Baldur's Gate#once again my paranoia that I'll Get Lore Wrong bc I'm invested but not THAT invested lol#They lived in Baldur's Gate for a few years then moved back out to the Cloak Wood that's my headcanon for that#I think these two also have a lot of common interests but they were all too abstract or wordy to put here#like falling asleep on the balcony#or listening to the sounds of the sea#I saw a lot of other people list Gale as lawful pre-game and I'm.....skeptical haha#ok sorry I'm done have a lovely day!#bg3#baldur's gate 3#bg3 tav#bg3 otp#valc0#bg3 croissant#gale#gale dekarios#breadweave
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if one more person tries to claim that the oh hellos are no longer christian i am going to lose my shit
#they are no longer EVANGELICAL and they don't associate themselves with the organized church#but like ... the whole anemoi series is about deconstructing their faith and coming back around to a new faith? still in god??#they don't just use christian themes. they are christian. if u think that they are NOT christian then u are not understanding their music#like .. i am not religious so this isn't coming from a place of needing them to be recognized as gospel music#if u want to interpret their music differently then go ahead!!!#but straight up. we KNOW what those albums are about because they have TOLD us. & they're deeply intertwined with tyler and maggie's faith#going around spreading the idea that they aren't christian at all is so so so so so so fucking stupid#it's fine if u don't want to think the songs are about christianity but then don't pretend u know what they mean!!!!!#don't pretend u understand all the albums while claiming they're not christian because they ARE!! that's like the whole point!!!!#idk. whatever. just feeling some type of way about people like refusing to use absolutely any critical thought#yes the oh hellos are extremely progressive. no they are not evangelical. yes they try to be subtle about their faith & make music that#non-christians can also listen to & relate deeply to#but making up lies about their personal lives is like. ok whatever. but ur missing the whole point of the albums then. don't pretend ur not#please someone tell me they understand what i'm trying to say here#like this isn't coming from a christian perspective it's coming from a frustrated album-listener perspective#the oh hellos
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shoujo isagi........................... almost maybe.......................
#sora.txt#MAN.#v_v i love him i guess#i am going to sleep now what the fuck#this will be made separate parts[fics] obviously n also a lot of it is like. timeline wise inconsistently not like an actual fic usually is#think of it as... shoujo isagi bf in different days and scenarios throughout your relationship. the real fic is just the first part#but the other parts are like. delving into different days of their relationship/based on their relationship#yk? like. ig sequels to the first part#like fics derived from the first fic part ? idk if there's a name/category for this kind of fic LMFAOOO i'm still very new 2 fic labelling#so idk i hope that makes sense if not yeah idk if my tags make sense bro im yapping and i havent slept its 7am#i hope u get it tho. im happy to elaborate in a couple of hours if anyone is curiousss#i do think its mostly just shay who will read it/them KJDFSHJK LOL but yk >:3c#it's. insanely cheesy and cutesy and lovedovey tbh. like sooo mushy lovesick gf/bf first time 2gether type stuff etc#and 0 angst here lol. and lots of gf/bf sex. and very very VERYYYY self indulgent and written with my soul and heart and mind btw#i projected onto reader like fucking crazy#thats why im like . having an insane productive blast cuz i truly wrote this just for me lol#BUT YES. oui. eh oui oui#ok. sniff u later in a couple of hours stinkiesss
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We're opening up a rift in the Braccatolian space. Won't see us coming. Kind of scary. Then stop. Once the Empire is established, and there's a new Gallifrey in the heavens, maybe then it stops... the drumming, the never ending drumbeat. Ever since I was a child, I looked into the Vortex — that's when it chose me. The drumming, the call to war. Can't you hear it?
#tenth doctor#simm!master#doctor x master#dwedit#dw#*#i was gonna strategically crop lil guy out of that 3rd gif but you know what? i'm not a coward.#woe lil guy and his tiny custom-made pinstripe suit be upon ye#ANYWAY. why did the master say ''good'' here. hello. i'm rattling the bars of my fuckign cage why did he say that#is he glad the doctor is spared from it??????#also the doctor like. not listening. at all. not even trying to listen apparently#since all it took was one lil forced contact in eot#still giving him an absolute for an answer. ''it's only you.''#all the shit ten says throughout this oh we're the only ones left it's the two of us blah blah blah. but where it counts? IT'S ONLY YOU.#see obv i'm master biased but all this shit makes me crazy abt the stuff 12 said to missy. ''you never learned to hear the music''#bro you NEVER LISTENED to him. you're still not listening to her!!!!!#araghghagh. ok.
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I wanted to draw something to post here
Because you know, if I don't do anything, I don't exist for anyone
And I forgot about this sketches, but I love my favorite time idiots
#afk arena#drawing practice#traditional art#sketch#afk orthros#afk zolrath#afk arena au#still au yes#their relationship is kinda.. hm#I wrote a fic about it#but I know that nobody likes small AUs with non popular characters#so we are here#I'm alone and the fandom together#as always for me lol#so#why am i still alive#I don't want to be#I want to draw my au Ansiel#and my ocs#and post here#but why if it will be ignored?#it's OK if I will be ignored#but Ansiel? he deserves the world
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this tree from my new drawing looking goated afffffff 👑👑
#yes this is a nel/vas drawing get off me😂#text#i wanted everyone to see it but also since i draw on paper in total silence i think a lot about everything so i wanted to voice some -#- thoughts too's. tbh i've been veeery self indulgent lately#actually i'm happy that n*lv*s is getting actual hits out of me that i like looking at#especially on-paper stuff that i can recall being fun for me to draw. all traditional art is fun to draw#and digital has turned into an actual task for me (only sometimes tho maybe i;m lying.. mspaint we're still bffs)#i think i just don't see the joy in trying to scrap up a ''' finished ''' piece in an art program .. pencil i love you and i love the -#- feeling of it scratching along the paper....sigh............ Rabu#i don't want my blog or thoughts to turn into traditional art suck-off ventures bc ik not everyone can get into it for many possible -#- reasons but if u feel like it U can ok? do it for Pencil✏️ and for me? for silusvesuius? 𝖎 𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖑 𝖕𝖗𝖔𝖙𝖊𝖈𝖙 𝖞𝖔𝖚#but Lord i hope i don't also come off as one of those people that r like 'to improve in art just draw that one fictional character u -#- rly like 😂😂' bruh gtfo my face with that.#i'm noticing 'improvement' in my stuff mainly...i think... because i'm always striving to impress#not so much other people that are here just for my art but more so myself#i have a very huge ego (Mind Battle)#also it makes me sad to think about how big egos or genuine (not obnoxious) flauntiness are looked down on#and i can tell bc i used to look down on people that would express the things i'm expressing now#especially in art focused spaces. now i'd rather be in a circle of artists that love to J*rk off their own brain for it's ideas -#-and talent than be w/ very self-conscious artists that are never expressing pride about any of their work#worse if it's to the point where they actively start to fish for compliments bc of it#fishing for compliments is always OK i just wish it didn't stem from insecurity in that context if that makes sense#but maybe that's very easy for me to say and admit bc i did develop a very big ego around my art and ... Creativity? like it's a sims skill#not that i still don't seek out 'attention' or compliments from others to soothe myself but hmmmmmm i hope u feel me.#it just turns me into a very competitive person#who am i competing with? Myself#i'm always in 'you can do better Because you're YOU' mode#which is much better i believe than comparing yourself 2 other artists#i don't think a lot of people read my tag ramblings but if u do i wonder how one feels about a very pompous artist#like me .......(?)
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gang I'm not sure I have the courage to come out to my boxing coach
#I need to do some sort of physical activity and that always felt good#but it has always been deadname and women's locker room#then big hiatus from my part#and now I'm back again. again with the deadname and women's locker room#but it feels so wrong#and today I felt like shit because there was people in the locker room#but what is the solution?#to come out ?#they'll laugh.#I don't pass#I never pass#I think people at university don't misgender me only because they're kind#but I don't pass#maybe they'll even nod solemnly and say ok we accept you#but we all know they'll never not see the hips the chest the face the high pitched voice#and I have been stuck here since forever#everyone I know. EVERYONE#is now either on t or can pass#even people who've idk started after I was already going to the therapist because of it#and yes everyone has their own oath and yadda yadda yadda#but why I'm stuck?#I don't understand why I can't go on.#I feel like shit#and mother is ok with it but I know she still hatesthis whole thing#I gave her time I swear#but I miss her#and I tried telling her this and she. she doesn't want to hear it#because in her mind “if you really want it you do it”#like I could pass by sheer willpower#personal
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just remembered i am 21 and this is the prime of my life
#HCSFVDGSY#downhill from here ? ok..#anyway i remembered partly because i looked in the mirror and partly because i've been thinking about how. i'm not even that fucked up or#deformed and still no one wants me :/#just an observation. like i spent (and spend?) a lot of time hating myself and questioning why someone would like me or want to be around m#and that's hard to be around. and i've been reclusive. and it's hard to get out of that#it perpetuates itself it insists upon itself . but yes i know i make it hard to get to know me and like me#so i shouldn't expect anything and i DON'T !! but ‚ i think i'm allowed to conceptualize it as an absence sometimes#I don't Want anything (and i couldn't handle anything) but. but but but. you know??#kata.txt
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#detective conan#dcmk#名探偵コナン#meitantei conan#edogawa conan#mouri ran#mouri kogorou#anime#episode 240-241: the shinkansen transport case#my stuff#my gifs#detco posting#i'm so sorry for the grainy quality i know it's shit but i'M still learning + hard to find good material out there#(next plan: gotta invest into dvds so i can make better gifs. it's a crime how detco doesn't have releases of all eps)#anyways i still wanted to share this#bc RAN PUTTING HIM IN A CHOKEHOLD#TOTALLY CONTAINING THE GREMLIN. It'S ICONIC OK?#this was such an impactful scene in the anime and yes i compared with the manga. anime slays here#ran is definitely not paid enough for babysitting this menace of a child#and i just love how she keeps her hold on him AND keeps him on her lap#this girl is perfect i tell you and deserves the world#also shinichi's expression IS BEAUTIFUL
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Playing around with the idea of the new ghoulette containing multitudes. Something something "I didn’t know if something had gone wrong." (<- line here taken from my own fic; there's a point to this)
Yeah, but what if it had and nobody had noticed right away?
Perpetua summons the new ghoulette who turns out to be a Multi, but no one knows she embodies more than one soul... primarily because she herself had no memory of it upon being summoned. The ritual took a heavy toll on her, which caused the memory loss and left her weakened upon being pulled topside as a result. Perpetua thinks something went wrong with the ritual but everyone is like "oh no being left fatigued can be a side effect of being summoned; it varries per ghoul", so he goes and names her (and insert your prefered name for the new ghoulette here) not knowing the truth.
The new ghoulette goes without knowing... until the forgotten memories get triggered one day. Maybe it's another ritual of some sort. In any case the shock is so intense that it causes her to collapse and she's unconscious for quite some time.
When she eventually comes back to herself she is fully aware of what she is, but doesn't know what to do with that information. So she becomes withdrawn, which worries everyone else, especially Aurora and Perpetua.
Aurora tries to get through to her with some degree of success, but eventually Perpetua has to be brought in on this. She's his first summon, and he does care for her so he wants to help. He and the new ghoulette talk for a bit an he eventually learns about who she really is. He accepts this wholeheartedly and says it doesn't change a thing: that he always knew there was something special about her.
Overwhelmed by this acceptance, the new ghoulette begins to cry, but also asks Perpetua if he would name these other parts of her as well. He agrees, saying he would be honored to do so.
The new ghoulette takes some time to explain to the others what she is and though it takes some time to fully comprehend it they accept her all the same. Maybe with some help from those who are partially or fully quintessence the new ghoulette better understands herself as well. Gets support from Aurora and Perpetua too since they were the first ones the new ghoulette actually spoke to about this once the truth became clear.
So yes, the new ghoulette contains multitudes; she is multifoiled. But she is still loved by her friends all the same.
#shay's misadventures#the band ghost#ghost bc#nameless ghoulettes#new ghoulette#yes i am writing a fic on this#yes this is based off that one fanart bc i am still so fascinated with the concept#full disclosure i'm still personally calling the new ghoulette Haze#(and this will be divergent from how i write her)#but i do want to explore this concept because there's some good potential here#when will i have this fic written? who knows!#some food for thought#i won't be tagging specific names for the new ghoulette here but feel free to tag this with your preferred name if you wish#also fun fact: Cocteau Twins have a song called Multifoiled!#me using it here is being a nerd#multifoil ghoulette! /j#i'm bored at work ok#i should be out listening to Ghost and annoying the populace
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2025 reads / storygraph
Project Hail Mary
sci-fi
a man wakes up on a spaceship with no memory, and eventually figures out he’s the sole survivor on a desperate mission to save humanity
his memory slowly returns through flashbacks, showing him how and why he ended up on the mission and how he has to search for answers alone
….except he’s not alone, because there’s an alien ship nearby, with its’ own sole survivor, in a similar situation
alien friendship :)
#Project Hail Mary#aroaessidhe 2025 reads#ok there’s some things about the writing of this that i did Not love. however. alien friendship :)#the narration and humor….I don’t vibe with it. though the explanation makes it more bearable.#The flashbacks have zero formatting differences which irritated me.#Also for most of the book I was like… I'm not sure I buy the believably of being that conscious of your memory loss??#While being otherwise very sharp and aware? And convenient memories? There is an explanation for this at the very end…#but it still annoyed me through most of the book#I don’t know science much but I felt like there was a lot of suspension of disbelief required -#also the language jump from 1 2 3 yes no to 'several thousand words' and sentences happened kinda fast#but of course some of that is just…necessary to tell the kind of story this is.#is there any sense to causing such extreme destruction to the environment just for the chance to save humanity? not really.#but I guess the story here is ‘okay what if they did that though’#ANYWAY all that said. Rocky my beloved……#I loved their nerdy friendship and this book made me cry more than I have at any book in a long while. lol#they’re best friends….he went back to save him……… 😭#I did expect the ending to be more tragic and/or open ended but you know what good for them.#no romance
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25コ目の染色体 | RADWIMPS
忘れてた泣き方 でも 今ここにある何か 目を閉じても零れそうな気がして
I will die for you, and I will live for you I will die for you, there is nothing more that I could really say to you
#25コ目の染色体#radwimps#音楽#gif#my gifs#these tags are an open letter to radwimps#an apology of sorts for not posting in time for their major debut 19th anniversary#i've been sitting on this gifset for awhile#wondering if it was still ok to finish up & post#but i love this song#i love this band#and i want to shout it from the rooftops!#thinking a lot about yojiro's latest ig post and#maybe they didn't release any 'new' songs this year#(not even gonna get into yojiro's solo work but like! the parades ost! わたくしどもは ost! WONDER BOY'S AKUMU CLUB!!!!!)#but yes what a full & exciting year it has been anyway!#starting off with 正解 as a fresh take on an older song#the new arrangement & production - not to mention several different versions??#and as someone who had just graduated i cannot even convey how warm & happy it made me feel :')#then we've got a whole 'nother world tour !!!#TWO YEARS IN A ROW !!!!!! ARENA TOUR !!!!!!! HOW COOL IS THAT#from which the white day dream photobook was born btw!#a project & event overflowing with special memories#there was also the blt album release ! not just to dvd/blu-ray but to streaming as well !!#hearing the fans sing along with so much love to songs from years ago - prior even to their major debut -#really drove home just how timeless music can be#more than any other art form i think music is something that can be passed down from generation to generation#and stays with you during every stage of life - continuing to evolve with you#i know i'll be listening & singing along to radwimps' music with just as much fervor & love for years & years to the day i'm no longer here#old & new songs alike i'm so grateful for their music & proud of how far they've come & look forward to the direction they head into next 💕
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