#William Spender

[not-a-newt]

what an illustrative description of everyone's most loathed favorite character in andromeda 😍🤗

[yardofblondegirls]

is this anything

[that--funny--feeling]

CSM and how the lies destroyed the Mulder family: a headcanon

I have a complicated and maybe personal image of CSM that to me makes more sense than whatever they tried to do with his character (since they changed minds so many times).

The focal points of his character are his envy, obsession with control and inability to love.

I think he really envied what Mulder Sr. had with his family, even before Fox and Samantha were born. He had a wife who loved him and above all he did his same job (more or less) but that hadn't turned him evil or selfless. I like to think of William Mulder Sr. as a decent and kind person, at least when he was younger.

Obviously, his life wasn't perfect and he and Teena probably fought a lot because of the secrecy of his work. I think that was the real first struggle about the truth that the Mulder family had (1°). Bill couldn't be honest with his wife about what he was doing and that created a distance. CSM may have taken advantage of this situation, growing closer to Teena maybe while Bill wasn't there for her.

Deep down in the headcanon tunnel from now on, I like to think Teena and CSM didn't have an affair but just a one night thing. Teena probably never forgave herself for that night and never told Bill about it (2°). Bill never asked, but understood what happened (3°).

At this point, CSM wants to have a relationship with her, but she refuses him and just wants to forget what happened. He's insistent and she starts hating him.

Soon after, Teena and Bill's relationship gets better and Fox comes into this world. Now. I'm not sure what to believe (pun intended) on CSM's being his father. Because, in this logic, he could but so could Bill. Surely CSM thought to be Fox's father and thought to have rights on him, no matter what Teena could say about it.

CSM marries Cassandra, they have Jeffrey, he tries to have what Mulder Sr. has but doesn't work. He can't love. His wife starts hating him, his son is a delusion for him. In the meanwhile, Samantha Mulder is born.

When the time of the abductions is closer, Bill and Teena get to choose which one of their children to "sacrifice" (4°). They painfully indicate Fox, because he's older and stronger, but CSM don't even give them the luxury of the choice. Fox is his son, so Samantha will go. That's the moment where the Mulder family irremediably shutters. Teena divorces Bill and Fox will never know anything about this from his family (5°).

Maybe after the abductees' return, CSM goes to Teena, offering her a possible life with him (this could be why he took Samantha and she wasn't returned). She doesn't believe him and swears to never talk to him again.

Samantha starts living with CSM, he has now what Mulder Sr. had, but again, he can't love. She understands that he constantly lies to her and hates him, so she quickly becames useless to him and he uses her for experiments.

His fixation on the Mulders keeps going, because he thinks Fox is his son, but above all because he likes him as a person. He challenges him, has a goal, a conviction, doesn't care what the others think about him. Maybe he thinks they are similar and that's why he sometimes protects him. But again, he doesn't know what love is, so if there's something more important, he's ready to sacrifice him.

He thinks he knows Mulder and tries to get him on his side more than once, but he fails. Mulder was loved and is loved, he knows what love means, he's kind and decent, even more than his father William.

He thinks he knows Scully because of his own past, but he understands nothing about her or their relationship, because it's the complete opposite of what he's ever experienced. ("You'd die for Mulder but you won't allow yourself to love him" he says to Scully in En Ami, while they're already in a relationship.) And he lies, lies, lies, the thing that made him advance in his life. At the cost of love.

What could really have saved the Mulder family, was the truth, that will become Fox's reason of life. If Teena told Bill about her moment of weekness, if he ever asked her instead of acting like nothing ever happened, there could have been hope. Hope to forgive, to go on. But what they did was the opposite, letting Fox enter in these net of lies. Hiding everything from him "for his own good". But that's not what he wanted and accepted ("The truth will save you, Scully. I think it'll save both of us").

My TXF posts and videos.

[xfiles-vibes]

One thing that I will always be desperately sad about is the relationships that Baby William never got to have with not only Mulder and Scully, but other people in his life—particularly his actual half-uncle, Jeffrey Spender, and his pseudo-uncles, The Lone Gunmen.

While Jeffrey’s attempts to get close to William are ultimately to the end of “stealing him away” from CSM and making him normal, I still believe that Jeffrey cared enough for his half-brother’s child to not want him to live a life in danger and potentially be subjected to experiments as he was. If Mulder and Scully had gone into hiding with William, would Spender have still dropped by to visit? What would his relationship with his half-nephew be like?

Meanwhile, the Gunmen purely care about William because he’s the child of two of their close friends. They understand from the beginning how special he is, and are the only three people we see who show up after his birth bearing gifts. They are also the last line of defense in protecting William when he is threatened by the alien cult, with Scully specifically telling Monica Reyes that she is giving William to the “only ones left we can trust”. Whether or not they would have been wholly competent babysitters is debatable, but their care and concern for William is there, and it’s a shame we didn’t get to see them interact with William more. One can easily imagine Byers reading the baby back issues of the Lone Gunman to get him to fall asleep, Frohike teaching him to say curse words as a toddler, and Langly not being mad when the baby messes with his hair.

Anyway, we got robbed of Baby William actually knowing his uncles and I will forever be furious about it.

[caridrea]

William.

Pura devastación emocional. Este capítulo me tuvo al borde de mi asiento. Por qué tienen que hacer sufrir tanto a Scully? 😭😭😭😭

[nerds-yearbook]

On June 19, 1998, the X-Files jumped from the small screen to premiere as a feature film The X-Files: Fight the Future. Creator Chris Carter, cast and crew had hoped after season 5 to continue the series as films, however Fox insisted that it continue on as a TV series. The next The X-Files film wouldn't appear until 5 years after the first run of the series cancelled (The X-Files: I Want To Believe July 25, 2008). The movie saw a new development in the pending alien invasion and gave a reason to re-open the X-Files, which had been closed in season 5. It teased fans with a kiss between Agents Mulder (David Duchovny) and Scully (Gillian Anderson). The movie also saw the demise of The Well Manicured Man (John Neville). Some of the TV series regulars who appeared in the movie were The Cigarette-Smoking Man (William B Davis), A.D. Walter Skinner (Mitch Pileggi), Langly (Dean Haglund), Byers (Bruce Harwood), Frohike (Tom Braidwood), Group Elder (Don S Williams), 2nd Elder (George Murdock), and the Black Haired Man (Michael Shamus Wiles). Some of the characters that were exclusive to the movie were Kurtzweil (Martin Landau), Bronschweig (Jeffrey DeMunn), Cassidy (Blythe Danner), Michaud (Terry O'Quinn), Strughold (Armin Mueller-Stahl), Fire Captain Cooles (Gary Grubbs), and The Barmaid (Glenne Headly). If the British Valley looked familiar it was because Milton Johns also appeared in the Empire Strikes Back and the original run of Doctor Who. ("The X-Files", Movie, Film)

[television-overload]

i mean.

if anyone is immunocompromised and needs a mask, it's cancer man, i suppose

[incorrectdisneyy]

Chase: I left everyone instructions while I’m gone.

Adam: Mine just says “Adam no”.

Chase: I want you to apply it to every possible situation.

[sixhours]

Morning Sickness

Rating: Teen Word count: 1.2k

Notes: Post-ep for season 11. That “season finale” inspired me to try to make sense of the nonsense, and maybe give Mulder and Scully a chance to start to deal with the shit they’ve been dragged through.

Originally posted to AO3, Mar. 26 2018

It's dawn when Mulder shifts the car into park. A drizzle mists the windshield, muddying the house’s looming form, the dim glow of the porch light their only welcome. Next to him, Scully sleeps deeply, his jacket tucked into the crook of her neck.

He reaches across the console to touch her cheek. "We're home."

She stirs, blinking, before fumbling at the door handle in a rush. She's out of the car before he can offer to help, making her way to the house. He watches with concern as she pauses at the foot of the steps, leaning on the porch railing for a moment as if to catch her breath, before disappearing around the side of the house. He winces when he hears retching.

Skinner was going to make it, they said; a lumbar spinal fracture and two broken legs meant he had a long recovery ahead, but he was alive.

Reyes hadn't been so lucky. Mulder found her slumped in the driver's seat of Spender's car, blood pooling in the corner of her eye. Scully had moaned softly behind him, turned, vomited bile onto the pavement.

It wasn't until later that he remembered; Reyes had delivered William, had held him as he'd taken his first breath.

Mulder shudders, stumbling forward to check on Scully, finds her crouched over the overgrown garden. There's a lone rhubarb stalk struggling to greet the day, leaves beaded with rain, a survivor among the bittercress and chickweed.

"You OK?" he asks, feeling helpless.

"I need to eat," she murmurs, standing. "The nausea is worse if I don't."

He reaches for her hand, takes it, guides them inside. She shrugs off her coat, then ducks into the bathroom and closes the door.

Mulder stands in the kitchen, unsure where to begin. It had felt good -- too good -- to put aside reason, to put his finger on the trigger, aim, and let the bullets do the rest. He thinks of gunpowder residue and blood spatter, pushes up his sleeves and scrubs his hands until they're raw.

When that's done, he opens the fridge. She needs to eat. Bread, lettuce, turkey; this, he can manage. As he works, he doesn't think about the water lapping at the dock, doesn't think about watching himself fall backwards, doesn't think about the bullet lodged between his son's eyes.

He cuts the sandwich in half and sets it on the table with a glass of milk. She doesn't like milk, but it's good for the baby, right?

The baby. Christ.

He sinks into a chair as the weight of the day hits him. When she comes out, bathrobe cinched around her waist, he's staring at the table with his head propped in his hands.

"Thank you," she murmurs, sitting down, picking up half the sandwich and taking a small bite. Her expression is distant and closed, the dark circles under her eyes betraying her exhaustion. It's a long time before she speaks again, and when she does, her voice is almost inaudible.

"I had a...a vision," she murmurs, sipping her milk. "I saw William."

Mulder's pulse throbs, a glimmer of hope expanding in his chest. "You...he's alive? You're sure?"

She nods, avoiding his eyes. Bite, chew, swallow, sip. Repeat.

"How...?" he leans forward.

"I don't know," she sighs.

"If it's true, there's still a chance we could find him," Mulder says, thinking aloud. "We could--"

"Mulder, stop. Not now, I can't..." She trails off, ducking her chin, and he thinks of the warmth of her stomach against his blood-flecked palm. "He can't be another quest. You have to let him go."

Mulder swallows. "But...he's alive."

She nods, pushing the plate back. "He's weak, but he's safe. For now."

"Then he'll find us," he says, more to himself than to her. "Someday. When he's ready."

She presses her lips together. When she answers, her voice is hollow. "I'm going to bed."

"Scully..."

But she's already on her feet, moving toward the stairs. He watches her go, feeling lost, unmoored.

He's alive.

Mulder wraps the untouched half of the sandwich and puts it in the fridge, pours the leftover milk in the sink.

He finds her in the upstairs bathroom, staring into the mirror, her reflection haunted and pale. Steaming water runs into the basin, unnoticed.

"Scully?"

She startles, meeting his eyes before reaching for a cloth, but doesn't answer.

"Talk to me, Scully," he says, wishing for a church, for the ease they found over a prayer candle.

"Everything," she frowns, rubbing at her face with the cloth until the freckles across her nose burn pink. "Everything I tried to prevent for him, everything -- it came true."

She dabs lotion on her chin, under her eyes, punctuating each word with angry, jerky movements. "I lived with the guilt of his adoption, but there's nothing I could have done," she says, turning and striding past him to stuff the cloth into the hamper. "I never had a choice."

"Scully--"

"They used me, Mulder," she whirls on him, voice rising. "They used my body to make monsters. And I loved them, and they were taken from me. How can I bring another child into the world with that on my conscience? What hope do I have of keeping them safe, when everything that's come before has been ripped from my hands?"

She breaks off, her breath ragged, swiping at the corners of her eyes.

"What they did to you is unforgivable," he says, approaching her. "But this...this is different. You have a choice."

"I can't do it again," she breathes, eyes pressed shut. "Damnit, Mulder. It's not fair."

"No. No, it's not. But you don't have to do it alone," he whispers, taking her face in his palms, searching her eyes. "Do you want this, Scully?"

"I do," she says, her voice cracking as the tears pool in the whorls of his thumbs. "I do, so much. But I wish I didn't."

He wraps his arms around her, pulling her close. "So we'll make it work."

He imagines he can feel her eye-roll against his chest, but she softens. "Just like that, huh?"

"Just like that. I'll trade in the Mustang for a minivan, we'll get a Baby Björn--"

She sniffs. "What the fuck is a Baby Björn?"

"I have no idea," he admits, chuckling. "But if the number of missed calls on my phone from Kersh is any indication, we'll have a lot of free time to figure that out."

"I'm fifty-four, Mulder," she sighs, her voice small.

"And your breasts will be the envy of every grandma at the AARP."

She barks a laugh into his chest, fists gripping the fabric of his shirt as her laughter dissolves into a sob. He nuzzles the hair at her temple, kisses it, sways with her until the storm passes.

"What can I do?" he murmurs when her breathing has calmed.

"Just...hold me."

"That's what got us into this mess," he says, nudging her cheek with his nose, eliciting a tired smile. He pulls back the covers and follows her into bed, pulling her back against his chest. His fingers trace the line of her hip.

Tentatively his hand slides forward to her abdomen, barely touching, asking permission. She places her palm over his in answer, pressing down, guiding him to the spot just above her pubic bone where a gentle swell has already formed. He swallows hard, overcome with love and sadness and fatigue.

"I don't have it in me to hope for this, Mulder," she murmurs, her voice rough.

He kisses her cheek, whispering a prayer to the nape of her neck. "Sleep. I'll find enough hope for the both of us."

[swingtoscano]

Trattate bene la vostra solitudine e la sua.

Baciate la sua nuca all'improvviso.

Noi siamo bestie che possiamo farci delle gentilezze.

Ricordatevi William Blake:

«Chi desidera ma non agisce, alleva pestilenza».

Diffidate della psicologia, l'inferno del chi sei tu e del chi sono io.

Arrendetevi quando vi portano rancore per i torti che vi hanno fatto.

Diffidate di chi vi fa la Tac ma poi non vuole spendere tempo per la cura:

quando non hanno tempo

lasciate stare, non è una storia d'amore; quando non dovete avere pretese, quando dovete essere garbati, lasciate stare, non è una storia d'amore.

Franco Arminio

[not-a-newt]

"tHE oFfeR iS leGiTimATe" William spenders bitch ass about to cause The Krogan Rebellion: Part Two™

[randomfoggytiger]

Shiban on giving closure to William's open-ended adoption:

Shiban gives away very little about the finale but does answer some questions about baby William, who we last saw being given up for adoption in the episode William. “We all discussed it and knew we wanted to bring some closure to that story as we were trying to do with everything on the series. There was some debate about what to do and what the best thing to do was. That idea (giving William up for adoption) was from Chris and Frank. It’s a safe place for the baby. I don’t think anybody wanted to continue playing jeopardy for the baby any longer. It started to become for all of us painful. The great thing about this solution is that it was a way to cure the baby in a very satisfying manner because it was a part of this revenge plot of Spender’s. It leaves Mulder and Scully with a huge emotional burden. You see in the finale that they do carry that with them. It’s not just ignored by any means. This is a family issue that must be dealt with. It’s a very, very emotional scene, a touching scene. I think you’ll be happy with the result.”

Poor Shiban--

Looking back at the life of the series, Shiban says his two favorite episodes are Leonard Betts, which he co-wrote with Vince Gilligan and Frank Spotnitz, and Existence.... 

Shiban’s other favorite, Existence, is purely personal. “That was my son’s acting debut. He was Scully’s first baby. So that will always stick in my mind as a high point.”

[carefulfears]

how do you see mulder leaving in season 9? scully giving up william? how do they deal with these things? (their guilt, resentment, futility, etc)

i know i have a realllllllly unpopular opinion on all of this but as i've said recently, i just don't think there's anything easier on earth to convince mulder of than "things are safer if you're not here."

i usually come back to doggett's confusion in the beginning, the way he keeps asking and arguing and scully just keeps saying "he's gone" and shutting it down, until the end of the premiere when he realizes: "oh my god. it was scully. scully made him go."

god, it's sad. it's hard to talk about. i teared up trying to write this, as much as i am fonder of the storyline than most. i don't find it unrealistic or out of character or unfitting of the narrative. it doesn't mean i don't feel it's heartbreaking. i have such a hard time thinking of mulder missing that baby. not even having the chance to put up a fight, walking back into empty rooms. the show as a tragedy, finding your burden again, etc. the x-files as the gap between teary smiles at baby kicks to screams in a jail cell. as what it was in the beginning: unknowable answers to insurmountable grief.

and i just think about mulder's dramatic emails, writing that he doesn't think he can survive being away from them. spender looking at the baby and telling scully he's heard "so much" about him. mulder being tortured by soldiers, saying he's just thinking about his son. keeping 1 baby photo for 15 years. "i just missed both of you so much."

scully's fertility treatments and her prayers and her tears and her "last chance" and her miracle. and how deeply unfair it is, what happened to her. i don't think a single one of us could say what we could do if people kept breaking into our homes to suffocate a child we were still nursing. she didn't ever want to do it alone, that was never the plan.

but scully desperately wants to keep everybody safe. she thinks she’s keeping everybody safe. it’s hard to be starbuck. it's this conflict i keep talking about recently where you really start to notice how controlled she is by fear, how difficult it is for her to balance it all. my favorite visual on this is the gate at the house in i want to believe: every day the way she pulls up to it, gets out, opens it, pulls through, stops, gets out, closes it. repeat in reverse. and then she comes home and she says "the truth is, i worry about you." and that he's too isolated. turns around and shuts the door, leaves the house and locks the gate.

i wrote a bit a few weeks ago about scully's protectiveness and it made me think about what a trap it can be, how defending lends to fear and fear lends to defeat. to standing in a church 25-years deep and saying "i failed." in the tags of that post i asked "could they ever recover from her exiling him from being with their child because she was afraid it would kill him?" and said i don't know. and i don't, i don't know.

but i think there's something so brave in saying: i did the best i could, and maybe that wasn't right. it's why ghouli is one of my favorite episodes. scully sobbing to her son that she's sorry. she's sorry he doesn't know them. she wanted him, they loved him. "i was trying to keep you safe. i hope you know that." and she thought she was being strong, but maybe she was wrong.

things don't always shake out the way you want them to. it was always mulder that called their son a miracle, and mulder doesn't believe in miracles. mulder believes in the world, and the search, and the after.

[unremarkablehouse]

I always thought it made more sense that Samantha was CGB Spenders kid not Mulder. It explained why other abductees were returned and she ended up living with him on the base.

From a story perspective it’s way more compelling if William Mulder impregnated Cassandra Spender and when CGB found out he has been trying to get revenge transferring the feud onto Mulder…

Also, should Jeffery Spender have been more upset about losing a sister as well? They were living together for a long time it’s weird he would have no empathy for Mulder.

[whencyclopedia]

Warren Hastings

Warren Hastings (1732-1818) was appointed the Governor of Bengal by the British East India Company (EIC) in 1772 and became its first Governor-General in India from 1774 to 1785. Under his tenure, the EIC ruthlessly expanded its territory both in terms of conquest and through treaties of alliance with Indian princely states.

Hastings had a new vision for how India should be ruled, and it involved including Indians in their own forms of government and judiciary, but the chaotic reality of a post-Mughal India now beset with rivalries between princely states and the rapacious presence of EIC traders and its military meant the governor's plans came to naught. A flashy spender when back in England, Hastings was accused of corruption during his time in India, a charge he was ultimately acquitted of. Made a target of by the great political commentator Edmund Burke (c. 1729-1797), Hastings was a divisive figure whose own tumultuous career reflected the complex questions the British parliament faced in the late 18th century: How might the EIC be better controlled and how should India be governed if it became a colony in the fullest sense.

Early Career

Warren Hastings was born in Churchill, Oxfordshire, England, on 6 December 1732 into a family that had once been prosperous in Tudor times but was now rather down at heel. William's mother died young, and his father abandoned him to go and live in Barbados. Consequently, William was looked after by one of his uncles and sent to Westminster School in London.

Hastings joined the mighty East India Company as a clerk or 'writer' and sailed for India in 1750. In 1757, Hastings served as a volunteer in the EIC army commanded by Robert Clive (1725-1774) which won the Battle of Plassey against the Nawab (ruler) of Bengal. Impressed by the younger man, Clive secured Hastings a new position at Murshidabad in West Bengal. Serving from 1758 to 1761 as the EIC's representative at the court of the Nawab of Bengal, he supervised a lucrative trade in such goods as opium, salt, tobacco, and timber. He was appointed to the EIC's Council of Bengal in 1761 and served until he fell out with his fellow council members over policy matters. The historian W. Dalrymple gives the following character description of Hastings: "Plain-living, scholarly, diligent, and austerely workaholic, he was a noted Indophile" (ix).

In 1765, Hastings returned to England in triumph having enriched himself on India's resources, like so many other successful EIC figures had done. He was able to buy a new and bright red carriage and revive the use of his family's ancient coat of arms as part of its ostentatious decoration. Sir Joshua Reynolds was commissioned to paint Hastings' portrait. Unfortunately, Hastings income could not quite match his lifestyle, and he soon found himself in debt. The lure of India and its riches meant he returned as an EIC council official, this time in Madras in 1769.

Continue reading...

[nerds-yearbook]

In 1992, Special Agent Dana Scully is re-assigned to assist Special Agent Fox Mulder on a sub-department known as the X-Files. She quickly learned this would be no easy assignment. Not only was she being constantly confronted with things she couldn’t explain, but on her very first assignment found other forces working against her including a body she was autopsying being stolen and the hotel she was staying at being burned down, destroying her lap top and all her other evidence. (Pilot “X-Files” TV)