#Why the fuck would you choose to do it
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cartoonghosts · 3 months ago
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genuinely people need to tag triggers. Love all the 'not my responsibility to tag stuff the way you want it' shit but that is for fandom and weird kinks and whatever not LITERAL PICTURES OF SELF HARM AND BLOOD EVERYWHERE like I'd be fine if it was tagged 'tw blood' (which I don't have blocked!! I'd still be triggered as fuck but hey you tried idc) but when you don't tag it at all I have to assume you are actually trying to hurt someone. Yeah I block immediately but thst doesn't change the fact that I'm triggered and the sh urges are back. This is true for text posts too, although I try to block words (I genuinely hate it so deeply when people sidestep other people's word blocks with 'sewerslide' or button mash numbers in the word like. I am going to fucking kill you. 'Oh noo it's triggering to me uwu' bitch you made me actively suicidal for the first time in months. Fucking die. Don't post that shit if using the actual words triggers you). You ABSOLUTELY ARE responsible for what you put out into the words. People saying 'oh ur not responsible for other peoples triggers and emotions' are genuinely heartless and have never felt human empathy. You ain't responsible for how I react to your content, but you NEED to try your best to give people the bare minimum of warnings when you post triggering shit. Look at ur vent post and be like 'hey I'm gonna tag this as tw vent/ tw si' and you genuinely might save someone's life. Probably not but the chance should be enough for you to care and if it isn't, block me. Don't argue, just block me now.
#tw suicide mention#tw sui ideation#tw vent#Tw self harm#Tw sh#I'm just pissed as fuck#And since I'm in a bad mood I want to fucking kill someone violently#I'm trying to find some cute art on tumblr to look at and I get images of people's gaping bloody injuries#And someone talking about viscerally wanting to die#Because when I like and support and reblog mental health discussion and support#Tumblr algorithm then finds me a post tagged with like#Mental health#(Speaking of:)#tw mental health#Or depression#And yeah I get how it can be really nice to vent online and scream into the void I do it myself a ton#But if you aren't in the mental place to tag shit and do the bare minimum to be kind to others#Just save it as a draft#Come back 10 minutes later and add tws#It is genuinely so easy to not hurt people#Why the fuck would you choose to do it#What is wrong with you#Tbh this whole post is a lot more aggressive than I wanted to be but I'm really freaked out rn#And if I don't keep ranting I'm scared of what's gonna happen in general#I know I won't die and I really do believe thst I can keep myself safe for now but fuck it's hard and it would be easy if people were kind#And the worst thing is thst we are#I love people and I love how kind we are to others and I love how almost anyone is willing to be gentle with someone who needs it#So I know that this is a conscious decision to either remain ignorant to just to straight up hurt people#And that's so much worse than getting triggered#It's like I'm grieving someone who's still alive
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snekdood · 10 months ago
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"if we make america worse and more of a dictatorship that will be even harder to unravel and make it the way we want the country to be, maybe then everyone will join our Glorious Revolution!" bb girl you cant even be in the same room with someone who thinks you should vote, how in tf do you think you're gonna unite people to fight in The Revolution with you? it's gonna be you and your 5 friends, i hate to break it to you.
#i dont think you realize how repelling you and your politics are to everyone else#you get all of your validation for how Smart You Are from your friends and ignore any kind of feedback that suggests you should#change or do something differently. thats the only reason you're so convinced average people will go along with you bc you keep getting#affirmation from the people who ALREADY agree with you- but you have NO IDEA how to bridge the gap between people who agree#with you and disagree with you. you're horrible at convincing people of your side of things outside of straight up guilt tripping them#or bullying them like a highschooler. im sorry but the tools you learned to survive with as a kid aren't gonna help you in this situation.#the ONLY THING you can come up with to bridge that gap is a bloody revolution. thats how bad you are at this.#and you're also so bad at this and unimaginative that you dont even realize how THAT might not even be enough.#you cant imagine ANY kind of avenue to getting people to change AT ALL outside of blood and fire. and thats why people call you#an authoritarian.#i'll be honest- i really do think the world would be a better place if we did incremental change under a democratic president who wont#set the world on fire vs the godkingemperor republican WHO WONT EVEN LISTEN TO YOU AT ALL EVER AND MIGHT KILL YOU#FOR PUTTING UP A STINK. idk if you noticed but if that evil fuck gets into office we are severely outnumbered if he gets police#n shit to go after his own citizens. letting trump win is making this battle so much harder than it needs to be.#you are choosing trying to fix the world while its exploding vs trying to fix it before it explodes at all.#what is this like a procrastination thing? you wanna wait till the last minute to try? idfgi. wtf is wrong with you#throwing minority lives away to prove a point. and then you try to tell me you care. gtfoh.#accelerationists should never be taken seriously.
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yashley · 1 year ago
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Say something true!
#critical role#ygifs#imogearne#imogen x fearne#when you’re taking a picture of the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen and the camera falls back and fucking decks you in the face#fearne going it’s ok you don’t need to confess I know~~ while imogen interrupts to say ‘’you’re a loser’’ they drive me NUTSkljsgdlkjs#also my brain is a little beehive cos these two Started with Fearne being the enabler to darker things while imogen was cautious#to fearne Seeing imogen about to be lost to ruidus and hardveering into panic that the power would never be worth losing her#to imogen hearing fearne hesitate and deny the shard and then telling fearne she should do it anyway#the way these two handle the other's Sways in darkness in such a Knowing way - ‘’Are you sure it wasn’t intentional?’’#there’s like this ping and before it was encouraging and now fearne is scared and imogen is enabling the risk#and it’s like either imogen is silently ensuring laudna’s safety by fearne taking the shard despite any risk#or imogen honestly believes that fearne is stronger even than the power she would embrace. There is no risk. Fearne will conquer this.#so it’s like is it ulterior motives or is it faith or is it hypocrisy or is it all three at once it's so good#imogen spending her entire life running from her power so isn’t it so much easier to tell fearne she can just do it while imogen couldn’t#or is it just her genuinely encouraging fearne from Knowing the aftermath of pursuing the power#but it's like imogen ...... why would fearne choose you over the possibility for power when she's never done that before#and is this insistence/encouragement going to actually reassure fearne or is it going to be another crack#and when they do the ritual fearne asks imogen to be the one to take her out and imogen tries to comfort her by agreeing#and fearne looks on sadly and nods#remembering when she was asked to be the one to take imogen out and all fearne knew was that she couldn’t#anyway imogen's face when fearne said you're in love with me imogen said NOT NOWDSHKJF
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outfoxt · 1 year ago
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Ok, I get it that YOU don't like organized religion and YOU think that my rules are stupid and unnecessary and that YOU think my loopholes are dumb and stupid
But I think that my rules are interesting and that my loopholes are funky and fresh so take that
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thoughtfulchaos773 · 4 months ago
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I've come to a conclusion:
Antisydcarmies love to say that Sydney represents the restaurant industry, so they can't be together.
It was also argued that the reason Carmy's panic attack stopped when he thought about Sydney is because she simply reminds him of work and believes in him. So, thinking about work is what calmed him.
It's suggested twice by Camy that he admits to Richie and Claire that, even though work is gnarly and gross and not always fun and requires hardwork, at the end of the day, he loves and chooses the job over anything else.
Carmy Loves work = Carmy Loves Sydney
Now, about the gnarly and gross parts, it can be at times challenging in a partnership to love each other. Love can only be feelings at first and is led heavily by that at the beginning. The hormones are going off- and the heart is beating fast because of attraction. A teenage love.
But when love is no longer a feeling - or when the feeling can't be the only thing that holds it together. Love then becomes a choice. A choice to prioritize the relationship and choose to keep working on intimacy and growth on both sides, to choose to lead each day with love, the relationship deepens.
From what I recall, Chris Storer wanted to make a show where love can be shown to sometimes be kind but also ugly and complicated - which makes sense given his life story dealing with trauma and the complicated dynamics of family.
Anyway, despite it being gnarly and gross and 200 hours on and off. Requires his complete focus and nothing else. Carmy still chooses to love Sydney since she was the only one he got to choose to love in the first place. She was someone his family didn't choose for him. She's part of his found family.
Now, repurposing trauma makes sense. He loves his work and what he does, but there's trauma attached to it. Similarly, he wants to love someone and be loved, but there's trauma associated with loving someone and being loved. Therefore, he has to repurpose his trauma related to both work and relationships with Sydney, and make it beautiful and kind rather than just challenging. If he repurposes his trauma, he can start to heal and find joy and purpose in what and who he loves.
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nocofamilyau · 5 months ago
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YOUR BABY RAJ IS SO CUTE I WANNA HUG EM!
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glad to know! he is very huggable!
I've been noticing quite a lot of ppl enjoying this blog probably solely for baby Raj, and honestly I don't blame them he's kind of a saving grace to this whole thing when you really think about it
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vonlipvig · 6 months ago
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i regret to say that i'm obsessed with the unveiled official portrait of king charles that looks like it was painted in the blood of a thousand innocents and would fit right at home in the castle of any tyrannical ruler from a horror game.
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queerofthedagger · 5 months ago
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Thank you so much for the tag @thebitchkingofangmar ! <3
Rules: Make a poll with five of your all-time favourite characters and then tag five people to do the same. See which character is everyone’s favourite.
I am bisexual how dare you make me choose /o\ this was physically painful good grief
No pressure tags: @emryses @kairenn-n @magicinavalon @glamdolf @swanhild and anyone else who'd like to, just say i tagged you! <3
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reds-skull · 2 months ago
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Revenant Side Stories
Story VI: Farah
[Konchar] [Graves] [Gaz] [Price] [Novikov] [AO3]
This was originally going to be a retelling of the entirety of Farah's story in MW 2019, but I underestimated how long that would be, so these are more of snapshots of her life, up until 2019.
Farah is going to be a central character in part two because it will revolve around Urzikstan, so I was very excited to get into her character in depth. This was probably the hardest side story to write because I think the original story was already good (it's easier to write for something that had a lot of flaws in it rather than something good... maybe that's why I like cod after all these months lmao)
Anyway, I also decided I'm actually not done with the side stories, and the last actual one will be of... Roba, of all people. I know I made the comic for Ghost's origin story, but I never got to show what he did to Roba.
Alright That's enough rambling let's get to Farah's story
She doesn’t remember the first time she has heard of revenants. Humans who are saved from death, only to come back with abilities from worlds beyond their own. Of how they are revered, looked up to. And yet, misunderstood.
They don’t look up to revenants in Urzikstan.
The once-dead are not heroes among her people. They’re something to be pitied; people who chose to stay on earth and suffer, instead of move on to a better, calmer existence in the place after death. Take on the burden of the Reapers, dust off the dirt of their graves, and continue the endless fight for freedom.
In Urzikstan, revenants are called “those who sacrifice”.
Her baba taught her and her brother the different names of Reapers, told them tales of those who sacrifice as bedtime stories. She always found them fascinating, as opposed to her brother. They were often grim, their ending tragic and unsatisfying, but they felt more real like that. Felt more like her day-to-day life than any other fairy tale could.
She wouldn’t know how much her story would be like those, before it was too late.
The day she died is muddy, in her memory. Yet another thing she sacrificed, in order to stay in this world. A deafening whistle, followed by walls collapsing around her. Streaks of ash on the bloodless face of her mama. Pain, unlike anything she could imagine. The voices of her baba and brother and uncle, searching. The sickening shifting of concrete above her, whispers praying for mercy, the walls closing in on her-
And she dies.
At seven, before she knew how to write the alphabet, buried beneath the earth with only the pale face of her mother as comfort, Farah Ahmed Karim died. Yet, she did not move on.
The memory of the first time she saw her Reaper was clear. She may have forgotten her mother’s lullabies, or her father’s laughter. She has not been given the privilege to forget her Reaping.
The first thing she noticed was the clean air, an odd odor to it but blessedly lacking the dust she has been inhaling for what felt like hours. The lack of pain was the second - her legs no longer crushed under thick concrete walls.
The monster, was the third. A being made of sharp shapes, glistening metal melting and hardening, flowing through cracks in the stone face of the Reaper.
As the stone face moved, grinding against itself, Farah got up to her feet. Her legs screamed at her to run, but the memory of her baba’s stories calmed her. 
“The ones who take do not mean harm to the ones who sacrifice, Farah.” he told her, whispering as to not wake her brother, “they need each other. They need our sacrifice.”
“What for, baba? Why would the ones who take need to give humans their powers?”
Baba sighs, a small smile on his lips as he tucks a stray hair behind her ear, “we don’t know for sure, but we must have something they don’t. Some say we humans were chosen by chance.”
“What do you think?” she asks, her endless craving to know more yet satiated.
“I think we and the ones who take are connected, somehow. I think we are the only ones that can sacrifice.”
Instead of running, instead of listening to all of her senses, Farah stepped forward, and with a small voice asked, “w-who are you?”
The stone face turns to stare at her.
“I AM MIGHT. THE STONE, THE BLADE, THE BULLET.”
The Reaper tilts its head, metal rivers splashing into an endless void.
“DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE?”
Farah blinks away the tears that have gathered in her eyes, tries to speak louder, “I’m… I’m Farah? I’m a human, I’m-”
“YOU ARE NOT HUMAN, FARAH. YOU ARE DEAD, BURIED, CRUSHED.”
Her lips turn downwards, and she can’t stop the tears any longer, “w-why are you asking if you know?”
The rocks grind in an almost rhythmic way, and somehow Farah knows it is laughing. It makes her avert her eyes.
“Can… can you save my mama?” she asks, and the sound stops.
“I CANNOT SAVE YOUR MOTHER, FARAH.”
“S-she… I think she also died, can you-”
“I CANNOT SAVE YOUR MOTHER, FARAH.”
She grasps at the torn edges of her dress, sniffing her runny nose, “it’s not… it’s not fair…” her face scrunches as she sobs.
The Reaper leans forward, the light surrounding it reflecting with dazzling colors off of its body. Farah closes her eyes, not because she is afraid of it, but because she is afraid for her mama.
“I CANNOT SAVE HER, BUT I CAN SAVE YOU.”
Farah opens her eyes. Baba said he thinks only humans can sacrifice, but maybe not all humans can. Maybe mama wasn’t able to sacrifice, but…
She lifts her hands to wipe roughly at her face, tears and snot smearing on her skin. Her eyes trail up the falling liquid metal, beating heart deafening her ears.
Her voice is steady when she says, “I want to see baba and Hadir. I don’t want to leave them!”
The stones grind once more, a sort of excitement shaking the very ground.
“YOU WANT TO LIVE, FARAH.”
She nods and repeats, “I-I want to live!”
The Reaper tilts closer, its face level with hers.
“I WILL GIVE YOU THE MIGHT, THE STRENGTH, THE POWER TO LIVE, FARAH. AND I WILL TAKE YOUR SOUL.”
The metal drips near her feet, heat emanating from them. It reminds her of home.
“I choose to sacrifice. For you, for baba, for Hadir. For… for mama.” Farah whispers.
The stones shift, circling her. Her breath picks up at the thoughts of crushing walls, but it is not dark here. No one is shouting. She doesn’t smell death.
 Metal singes her clothes, and she wants to jump back, but the stones stop her. It burns. It hurts.
It is not dark, but the bright colors blind her all the same.
“I ACCEPT YOUR SACRIFICE, FARAH.”
“MY MIGHT IS YOURS.”
When she wakes again, Farah doesn’t feel pain. She’s still under ruin, somewhere different from where she was before. All she sees of her mama is a hand, and she holds it. She notices the skin of her own hand glistening in the meager light filtering through dust and ash, like colorful metal. Like her Reaper.
It felt like hours pass before baba found her. She feels hunger and thirst, but the weight of the building doesn’t pain her anymore. Baba is crying when he finds her, pulls her out of the wreckage carefully, asking if she’s hurt.
She tells him nothing hurts. He pulls back from their embrace, his brows scrunched in confusion until he notices.
“I chose sacrifice, baba.”
Baba closes his eyes and hugs her harder, and she knows it would’ve hurt if she could feel it. He tells her everything will be alright. She wanted to believe it. She couldn’t.
They find mama. Hadir tries to wake her up, but Farah pulls his hands away. She tells him mama is in another place now, somewhere better than here. Hadir’s hands shake in hers, but he nods and pulls away.
Uncle and baba rush them home. Farah wants to cover her ears, the sirens don’t stop sounding, the noise pitching up and down along with her heart. Loud explosions make her flinch, so Hadir grabs her hand. It makes her feel safer, for a moment.
They run through the market. There’s a truck stopping in their way.
The Russians.
Baba lifts her in his arms, Uncle taking Hadir. They tell them to cover their mouth, when the Russians throw weird gas at them. It smells like the liquid mama used to clean their house, and it made her eyes itch and burn.
They enter their home, but baba doesn’t stop moving. He gives Hadir a gas mask. He will have to share his with Farah. Uncle leaves, telling baba he’ll meet them later.
“W-where are we going?” Hadir asks, clutching the mask.
Baba grabs a backpack, hidden behind the kitchen cabinets, “we’re going to the bridge, then to the mountains. There will be no sirens there.”
Farah hurries to follow him, wiping blood on her dress. Her skin isn’t bruised, but it feels weird.
“I don’t want to go…” Hadir says with a frown. Baba turns to look at him. He crouches and pets his shoulder.
“I know, dearest. I know. We will return, I promise.” his tone changed, stern like when he taught her not to touch the hot pan, “you need to be strong for your sister now, alright?”
Baba points to Hadir’s heart, “you keep mama here,” his hand moves to his head, “and you keep this clear. That’s how we survive, you understand?”
“Yes, baba.”
Baba shoulders the backpack, and begins walking towards the door, “when we get outside, you stay with me, okay?”
As he goes to open it, the handle moves, and the whole frame shakes. Someone is trying to get in.
“Stay behind me!”
The door slams open, a large man with a gas mask walking in. Farah takes a step back. The man meets her eyes and closes the door, and she stares at his gun.
Baba pleads with the man. He does not listen.
Baba throws his backpack at him, the man shooting a couple of bullets into the floor. They miss Farah’s feet by a few centimeters, and she freezes, breath held in her lungs. Hadir throws himself against the man, but gets shoved back.
The man pulls out a knife, baba manages to take it, stab the man. But it doesn’t change a thing.
It doesn’t save him, when the man pushes him to the floor, and shoots one, two, three, four bullets.
Only then do her feet unstick, and she mutters to herself, “hide!”
She runs back to her and Hadir’s room, crawling under the bed. The man shouts angrily and she hears something break.
Hadir. She needs to help Hadir!
As the man talks to someone on his phone, Farah crawls towards the kitchen, finding a knife. Mama always warned her not to play with them, but if the man catches Hadir…
In her heart, she asks for forgiveness from mama.
When she finds the man, he’s leaning against a wall, his hand clutching his side. Before she can think it over, Farah lowers and slashes at his legs. The man screams in pain, shooting a few bullets at the ground, and turns around to slap her.
It doesn’t hurt, but she drops the knife, so she runs away again.
One of baba’s tools is on the ground, must’ve fallen from his backpack. She grabs it and continues running, the man on her tail now.
The man says mean words to her, in Arabic, but her ears are pounding, her own heavy breaths the only thing she can hear. Her grip on the tool tightens.
“I’m going to kill you!”
Farah watches the man stumble in the hallway, searching.
“You’re going to see father soon, you piece of shit child!”
He trips on the rug. She sneaks closer.
“You’re dead, you hear me?! YOU'RE FUCKING DEAD!”
Farah runs forward, aiming for his other leg, but he turns around and grabs her hand before she can stab him.
“There you are!” he grabs her by the neck, slamming her to the floor, “got you!”
She can feel his hand wrap around her, crushing her windpipe, but it doesn’t hurt. The man grunts, before he freezes.
“You’re- you’re one of them?!”
Hadir jumps on the man’s shoulders, screaming, “get off her!!!”. He uses the knife she dropped to stab him in the neck, “get him, Farah, now!”
Farah grabs the tool, and uses all her strength to stab it into the man’s chest. He screams as flesh gives under the metal.
“It’s working! Again, sister!”
She pulls it out, and repeats.
“Good, Farah!”
And again.
Four times, until the man stops moving and making any sound. Farah takes his mask, the gun too heavy and tool buried in his gut.
Farah and Hadir return to baba. Hadir tries to help him up, but baba stops him.
“I can’t… I can’t go with you.”
Tears well in her eyes. Baba is leaving as well.
Hadir wraps his hands around baba’s, “what do we do?”
“You survive. Whatever it takes.” he turns to look at Farah, “even… even your sacrifice. Never give…up…”
Baba’s head drops. He’s gone.
Hadir stares at him for a moment longer. He gets up, “let’s go.”
They weave through the town, a murky green tinting the air. People are gasping and coughing around them, until a gunshot silences them. Hadir says it’s not fair. Farah knows.
It’s not fair, that they pass by people who get shot, and don’t get back up. It’s not fair, that she has to kill twice more, just for them to get a chance at freedom.
It’s not fair, when a man drags both of them away from it, a cruel smile on his lips as he inspects her.
It’s not fair, that she knows to recognize the malice in his eyes.
The soldiers take them to a prison. They find out she is one of those who sacrificed.
It’s not fair, she tells to the Reaper in her heart, that her sacrifice was not enough to save anyone.
She learns very quickly to hate Barkov. He learns, quicker, that his usual torture methods don’t work on her. He finds her weakness not in her own flesh, but in the flesh of the others. Hadir, in most cases. They keep the men and women separated, only allowing her to see him once every few weeks, and every time she gives them trouble, he takes the punishment. He tries to hide it, but he can’t hide his limp, or his bloodshot eyes, or the scars that keep multiplying upon his skin.
Contrasted with her flawless arms, glistening oddly in the light.
She gets into fights with her Reaper, in the earlier days. Demanding answers, for the simple question of “why?”.
Why her? Why this power, that only protects her? Why taunt her, tell her she’s under the Reaper of Might, yet show her every day how weak she is?
There are whispers among the guards, of a person by the name of “Karim”. A Commander, aiding the prisoners, attempting to contact foreign forces by transmitting messages from the inside. Barkov spends hours torturing her and the others, trying to find them. After a while, Farah notices a glint of playfulness in the wretched man’s eyes.
He knows who Karim is. He just wants to break them, annihilate the sense of fragile hope Karim gives the prisoners.
Barkov wants their spirit broken. Farah knows he will fail, because as long as any of them stand, they will not give up. For those who can't fight any longer, for those who are still with them in this hell, for Urzikstan.
They think one can uproot it from them. What they don’t know, will never understand, is that you can’t kill an idea. You can’t torture the memory of freedom out of them.
The soldiers seem on edge, mumbling in Russian about rumors of enemy forces invading Urzikstan. One of them slaps the back of her head when she stares too long.
The cycle continues - Barkov interrogates her, always keeping another prisoner in the room to torture in her place. Today it is Azadeh, younger than her by two years. Azadeh doesn’t flinch at the glint of a knife, but she screams as Barkov buries it in her thigh.
Farah’s guts burn at her wailing, at Barkov’s cocksure grin, his hand easily yanking the knife out of spasming muscles.
She breaks. Tells him she is Karim. It feels like an end.
Barkov freezes, before he pounces. Knocking her out of the chair, he covers her mouth, pinches her nose, deprives her of air.
Not many things can hurt her, but Farah still needs oxygen to live. Her wrists twitch roughly against the bindings tying her to the chair, Azadeh calls for her. Barkov snarls.
“I will not let terrorists like you ruin my country.”
My country… My country?
Urzikstan will never kneel to the likes of you.
As the edges of her vision darken, a soldier bursts into the room, his movements rushed as he informs Barkov the prison is under attack.
Barkov, always needing to have the last laugh, tells her she hasn’t saved anyone, that Karim’s role was only to doom her people, and orders his soldiers to the warehouse, to kill everyone.
Air fills her lungs as she inhales for the first time in over a minute. Barkov tells the man to take Azadeh to the warehouse, and her to solitary confinement. She gives Azadeh an encouraging nod, before they’re separated.
Karim hasn’t failed yet. As long as they’re still alive, she hasn’t failed.
Solitary is part of the older section of the building. Farah has been here enough times to know the rebar in the far corner of the cell is loose, and she herself have made sure, should the need arise, it will be easy to extract from the cracked concrete floor.
The moment the soldiers leave, she gets to work, pulling the metal with a grunt. With a few well-placed hits, Farah breaks the lock, and opens the door.
It is silent outside, in the way a graveyard is. Something sick spreads on her tongue, as she sneaks out of solitary. A few soldiers are making their way to the main cell block, to take the remaining prisoners to the warehouse, Farah assumes. The rebar feels lighter in her hands.
The first soldier she hits over the head screams as he goes down. The rest instinctively start shooting her. It doesn’t do much to stop her from caving their skulls in, besides ripping a few new holes into her clothes.
Searching the bodies yields her a key and an extra mag for one of the rifles. All of them were either empty or jammed, the frantic soldiers not recognizing her.
For them, all Urzik are the same.
Her sisters are relieved to see her approach. The gunshots scared them, fearing it was anyone but her. She opens the cell, freeing them. She uses the key to open a gun locker, and orders them to take up arms. No hesitation is visible on their faces. They all know this is an end.
Of the soldiers or theirs, it is yet to be seen.
“Our brothers have been taken to the warehouse to be executed. We are not going to let that happen.” Farah snarls, fingers aching as she grips the rifle, “are we?”
“No, Commander!” her sisters yell in unison.
Farah feels pride bubble up within her. They haven’t broken their spirit.
A series of far away explosions makes their little group flinch. Ayah asks, “who is attacking us, Commander? Are they on our side?”
“I don’t know. And as long as they distract Barkov and his dogs, it doesn’t matter. We need to move before it’s too late.”
They slam open the doors, Russian soldiers already ready at the other side. Her sisters’ aim is wobbly, the recoil more than they’ve experienced, but they have one thing the Russians don’t.
They don’t fear death anymore.
Nadia was injured in the firefight against a sniper. Ghalia has been limping since an explosion knocked her down. Darine and Azadeh are tired, they’ve been in solitary for days with little to no food or water.
They manage to hole up in the warehouse, but there’s no one there. Farah shouts for Hadir, her echo the only answer.
“Commander!” Azadeh calls, “there’s a way through here, this is must be where they are!”
Farah kicks the door open, turning right to clear the hallway, when a body slams into her from the left. She falls to the ground heavily, teeth bared as a barrel lines with her forehead. The other two soldiers aim at her sisters, Azadeh screaming in horror, “please don’t shoot!”
For a moment, Farah loses hope. Her mind supplies her with Barkov’s words.
“You haven’t saved anyone.”
In the next, the skylights shatter. Precise bullets take out the three soldiers, not a single wasted shot. Ropes are thrown through the broken windows, and men wearing gas masks repel down. One of them looks at her, “Whose Commander Karim?”
Farah huffs as she pushes a dead body off of her, “I’m Karim.”
The soldier swings his weapon to the side, “we got your message” he lifts the mask up, revealing a pale face, “Lieutenant John Price. Where are the others?”
The Lieutenant offers her a hand, and Farah grunts as he lifts her, “in there. Straight ahead.”
Price looks at the dark hallway, before turning back and lowering his mask, “stay close!”
Azadeh’s expression is uncertain when Farah stops her from following them. Wordlessly, she nods and returns to her wounded sisters’ side. They both know the path ahead is meant only for trained soldiers.
Trained soldiers, and those who cannot die to a bullet.
Farah keeps her rifle up as the soldiers and her scan the hall. Tanks with warning signs plastered on their exterior line the narrow passage way, and she doesn’t need to know Russian to know what’s inside.
“Got two!” Price warns, and takes out one of the guards. The other doesn’t waste time watching his partner go down, and before one of Price’s soldiers puts a bullet in his head, he aims and shoots Farah.
Straight shot to her heart. These guards are more skilled than the ones she fought through to get here.
Two hands clamp onto her shoulders, and Price’s wide eyes stare at her through the gas mask, “you’re not wearing armor- Karim, sit the fuck down, I saw the bullet hit you-!”
Farah frowns, following his line of sight to the hole in her shirt.
“Lieutenant-”
He holds her as if she’s about to collapse, muttering, “why are you not bleeding…”
Farah grabs his hands, and the Lieutenant’s brows shoot up.
“You’re a revenant.” his hands loosen, and drop to his side.
Farah nods, “no bullet or blade can hurt me.”
Something odd passes by Price’s eyes, but he doesn’t say anything to indicate what.
“Lieutenant, the prisoners are here! We need the breacher for the door!”
They run towards the back, and Farah slides to a stop at the scene.
In a room with large bullet-proof windows, where fire wars with the Russian’s sickly green gas, her brothers pound on the glass, their screams muffled.
They were going to watch them suffocate and burn.
She shakes out of her stupor when she notices Hadir. Slumped in the corner by a door, unmoving.
“You haven’t saved anyone.”
Farah runs to the other side of the door, where Price and his men are attempting to pry open it. They don’t have time for this.
“Stand back!” she grunts, and Price barely pulls the other soldier away before she shoots 4 bullets into the lock.
She barely manages to catch Hadir when the door slams open, her brothers running out towards fresh air. She should feel happiness, that they were fast enough to save them.
But in her arms is the still body of her brother, the one who has been through this hell with her from the beginning. The one with their mama’s eyes, and their baba’s kindness. Farah feels tears run down her face as she presses two fingers to his pulse. Nothing.
There are voices around her, speaking to her. She doesn’t hear a thing. No sound is worth hearing when her brother’s heart does not beat.
Price crouches in front of her, his mask off despite the gas filtering in from the room. His voice is gentle when he speaks, “Karim… we need to move.”
She shakes her head. It reminds her of how Hadir didn’t want to leave their house, when baba knew they had no choice. She has no choice but to leave him.
Oh, how could she leave him like this?
As the Lieutenant urges her again, as her brothers and sisters start to realize what happened, as Farah’s fingers stay on a paling wrist, she feels it.
A heartbeat.
Hadir gasps, his hands shoot up to claw at his neck frantically, and he jumps away from Farah. Everyone is watching him carefully as he catches his breath, silent and knowing.
Farah clenches her fists, failing to quell the shaking, “...why…?”
Why did you choose this over seeing mama and baba again?
Hadir turns to face her, but his eyes don’t meet hers. They’re not the blue-gray they were before, she notices. Green, like the gas that killed him.
“You survive, whatever it takes. Never give up.” Hadir repeats their baba’s last words. “Not even death will come between us, sister. Not anymore.”
“May your soul find rest.” she says, and her brothers and sisters murmur it with her. Hadir then lifts his gaze, and he gives her a sad smile.
Price and his soldiers stand back, looking properly shaken by seeing a dead man return. For them it is an anomaly.
In Urzikstan, they all know what a sacrifice looks like.
Farah gives herself a moment more to mourn Hadir, mourn the peace he refused to receive in death.
She gets up, grips her rifle, and orders her people, “collect survivors and supplies. We’re leaving.”
“Sister.”
She stops cleaning her knife for a moment, acknowledging Hadir’s presence with a nod, before continuing, “any sign of Barkov?”
Hadir drags a chair to sit in front of her, “no, we’re secure here. The Lieutenant cleared the area well.” he watches her hands work on the sharpening metal, “I… I wanted to tell you about my powers.”
Her hand freezes. “Immunity to the gas. I know.”
“No.”
Farah opens her mouth to question him, but when she looks up at Hadir…
Mist flows from his eyes and nose, pouring down his features. Green, toxic, smells of chemicals and death.
When he speaks, more gas flows from his mouth, “I’m not only immune, sister. I can create it.” fear paints his words.
“Enough.” she orders, though to her ears it sounds more like begging. Hadir stops using his power all the same, and it is with shame that he looks at the thin level of gas coating the floor of the run-down room.
Farah puts the knife and whetstone away, and hugs Hadir. He presses closer, and she feels his body tremble with silent sobs.
“You will not use this power. We do not need weapons of the enemy to win this war.” Her brother may be doomed, cursed forever to bear the gas within him, but it does not mean he needs to continue Barkov’s legacy.
Hadir doesn’t respond for a while, but when he pulls back, he nods. “Yes, Commander Karim.” he says, pride in the title. “What are your orders to our brothers and sisters?”
Farah sheaths the knife, her voice strong and clear, “Barkov must’ve had more prisons. It’s time we find more hands to help our cause.”
Alex Keller is… odd.
He had a surface level knowledge of the situation in Urzikstan when he arrived. Not from a tactical standpoint - CIA doesn’t let details like those escape them, of course. But from a human’s, and perhaps a revenant’s, it was clear Alex was not used to seeing such disgusting levels of violence unhidden for all to see. Barkov doesn’t need to hide it. America already knows.
The world already knows.
Keller’s abilities as a revenant proved advantageous from the very first mission they had. Infiltrating has never been easier, with a man able to become invisible to the naked eye. Later on he has told her of his weaknesses, that his form is still corporal even when see-through, and that electronic optics are able to catch traces of him. His honesty doesn’t go unnoticed, and Farah appreciates the trust he puts in her.
Hadir didn’t trust him at first. Despite his relation to Captain Price, he was wary of the American. It didn’t matter much to Farah, as long as they were amicable enough to work together, but seeing Hadir slowly let his guard down over the weeks was a moment of happiness in her days.
It helps most in days when Hadir seems distant, when a fog she can only call a thirst for revenge clouds his eyes. It feels like the times she has to fight against his violent suggestions double every new mission.
Something is brewing in his mind, she can tell. Hadir doesn’t want to share it with her.
At least Alex doesn’t push back against her orders with no good reason…
They’re on ground now, Alex using Hadir’s Sniper to scope the Highway of Death, and Farah spotting for him. They’re waiting for forces of Al-Mudahiyn, The Sacrificers, to pass through.
Al-Mudahiyn and the ULF used to be one and the same, until they weren’t. They share the goal of liberation, but where the ULF chooses to prioritize the safety of the people of Urzikstan, The Sacrificers choose the retribution on the Russians to be theirs.
Liberation will not be achieved peacefully, Farah knows that. But revenge won’t bring it either, and as much as she would hate it if it were to happen, if she had the choice to free her country but let her oppressors walk away unharmed, she would. She is sick of seeing her brothers and sisters die, and sacrifice, and bow their heads to men who see them as lesser.
In that, Al-Mudahiyn and her disagree. The militia focuses its powers on creating chaos among the Russian’s ranks, within Russia itself, and anywhere where its sympathizers live. And while they both deal in violence, Farah cannot agree to it being the objective.
It is a tool. One she will wield only as long as her enemy does. 
The SAS and CIA have begun to retaliate against Al-Mudahiyn, as has Barkov, their actions too flashy to ignore. Stealing several containers of Russian experimental gas was the last nail in the coffin.
The ULF along with Captain Price’s team decided to work together to stop them.
“One vehicle approaching from the east!”
On her mark, Alex takes down the two snipers that attempted to set up on the roof. Killing them is a calculated risk; it could alert their target and cause them to change course, but leaving them alive could’ve risked Hadir and his team, who are nearer to the road.
Two fighters from Hadir’s team take the truck and park it in the middle of the highway as a makeshift blockade. She watches as they rig it up with explosives, and orders them to wait for her signal.
Their target, as do many in The Sacrificers’ ranks, is a revenant. According to Alex’s sources in the CIA, they’re just a Revenant of Flesh. Their healing powers could save them from some injuries, but an explosion should kill them.
And if the explosion doesn’t do them in, bullets will.
They were ready for an ambush. Armored trucks, snipers, mortar teams.
“We need help! Where is Captain Price?!” Farah shouts as she fires on a few fighters making their way through the ruined house they’ve taken cover in. Alex pops up to shoot as well, but she pushes him behind her when a few bullets hit too close for comfort.
Her clothes are riddled with holes.
Hadir shouts from the rooftop beside theirs, “we cannot wait! I’ve got more firepower in the truck!” an explosion shakes the foundations of the house, “Alex! Follow me!”
Alex looks back at her, and she nods. Hadir’s intuition never failed them, his habit of preparing for the worst saved operations more than once. He’s not her second-in-command just because of their blood relation, she trusts him more than anyone else.
That is why, when green, toxic gas started covering the abandoned village rapidly, Farah didn’t dare think it was him. Hadir wouldn’t do that, he promised her.
She hears him shout to Alex that there are gas masks in the bunker. It should’ve tipped her off. It didn’t.
Coughing horribly, she ran towards the bunker, her steps unsteady as the gas coats her lungs. She has never forgotten the way it claws down her throat, burning, seizing her muscles.
Alex comes into view just as Farah’s vision begins to fade, and the last words she hears singe worse than any chemical could.
“H-Hadir… You’re… a revenant?”
When she comes to, it’s to the smell of dust. Her throat still burns, but as she coughs, she feels clean air filter through her nose. Farah blinks her eyes open, to see Hadir equip a gas mask on Alex’s face. He notices her eyes following his movements.
“Sister…” Hadir leaves Alex to approach her, his arms open. Before, she would’ve taken comfort to see he is not injured.
Now, all she sees is anger. Green, sickly, violent anger.
Farah pushes him away, but she is weakened, so his arms don’t leave hers, “how could you do this?!”
He tries to placate her. It makes her shake with exertion to get away. “I had no choice, Farah! I-”
“No. Not like this.” her eyes roll back, and before she loses consciousness again, she mumbles, “you promised…”
“-Farah!… Alex!”
She grunts. Her arms feel weighted when she pushes the dusty gas mask up and off her face. Alex does the same, trying to get up on his feet and failing.
Price’s voice invades her mind, and she winces. It is an unfamiliar feeling, still. “You’re alright, Farah. You’re alright.”
Still unused to the powers, she chooses to speak, “where is he…? Where is he?!”
Price finally reaches them, helping Farah get up, only for her to push off to rush out the crooked door, “he’s gone, Farah…”
She snarls. How dare he run, how could he leave- “no… Hadir… HADIR!!!”
“Farah!” Price follows her, catching her when she stumbles on the steps outdoors, “Farah, stop! Stop, he’s gone!”
Her fists clench on dry earth and she screams. Coward, liar, monster. No curse is bad enough to describe that fucking dog.
She feels Price wrap an arm around her, not to support, but to comfort. It reminds her why they’re here in the first place.
“There is no thief.” she tilts her head up, staring at Price’s blue-gray eyes. His brows knit in confusion, and she continues, “he created the gas. I’m sorry, Captain, I didn’t know, I didn’t know…”
She feels Price pull images from her memories. She lets him.
The Captain looks through her interactions with Hadir for the past few weeks. At first, Farah thinks he doesn’t believe her word, but Price relays to her that he’s not doing it for himself.
He’s proving her she’s not at fault.
“There’s no way you could’ve known, Farah.” he says out loud.
Alex joins him behind them, leaning on another soldier, “it’s okay, Farah. We’ll get him.”
She wants to bristle at those almost meaningless comforting gestures, but the look in Alex’s eyes is pleading her to let it go, for now.
Price helps her up again, shouting to Alex, “we need to un-ass this target- NOW!”
As they board the helicopter, Farah looks down.
Corpses line the desolate streets, no bird dares to sing at the sight. Both Al-Mudahiyn and ULF fighters lay still, eyes bulging and throat scratched raw. She grits her teeth, but her eyes don’t stray from the sight, even as the aircraft rises to the air.
Alex places a hand on her shoulder after a while, a questioning hum following.
She shakes her head, and with it his hand.
A voice that has haunted her for the last two decades drifts closer to her, whispering into her ears a sentence she hates to acknowledge has never been wrong.
“You haven’t saved anyone.”
At twenty-seven, Farah Ahmed Karim has lost the last remaining blood relative she had. There was no one left to mourn, except her.
In a dusty helicopter, with the smell of noxious gas still in her every breath, Farah promised to find him, the walking corpse of her brother, and stop him before he drags more of them down.
And unlike the man who once was her brother, Farah keeps her promises.
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sonknuxadow · 7 months ago
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knuckles series spoilers like actual spoilers not just me vaguely talking about my feelings
i cant believe they put iblis in the sonic movies before amy . what timeline are we in . sorry i was gonna hold out for a litlte bit on saying anything that could be an actual spoiler but i literally cant stop thinking about Giant Iblis Puppet Jumpscare . also for people who didnt actually watch it and are reading the posts about it this happens when wade is knocked out and sent to the magic ghost dimension and meets pachacamac and theres a musical number where wade is in a knuckles costume acting out knuckles' life so far and the giant iblis puppet shows up because apparently knuckles has fought iblis before??? and the iblis puppet is holding a laptop singing about facebook marketplace. im not lying i couldnt even make this up if i tried
also when i say "damn cant believe iblis got in before amy" i understand that amy would have been harder to incorporate its just wild that this happened. does that make sense. idk
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realasslesbian · 14 days ago
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I just had to share this email I got so all y'all can appreciate the absolute state of welfare services in Australia with me:
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The NILs Loan Scheme is a government funded, no interest loan scheme for people on low incomes, but this leaves me wondering exactly who tf can qualify for their loans. Because it seems like if you have any symptoms of poverty it's a no.
I applied because I need the clutch replaced in my van, which I live in. It's lucky that I actually CAN afford the cost myself (due to living in a van & not participating in Australia's increasingly ridiculous housing market). I thankfully can afford such an expense these days & was just looking for a responsible financial buffer, just in case. But if this had happened to me a few years ago when I first became homeless and was far less financially stable, then my next living situation wouldn't be "affordable housing" it would be a fucking tent.
Anyway, the backwards ass state of a GOVERNMENT FUNDED welfare scheme refusing to assist those who need welfare the most because they don't want to encourage homelessness or whatever the dumb fuck? Just really rustled my jimmies tbh. Just screams "yet another govt welfare scheme that's actually just about handing out money to fake charities & not helping the poor". Good Shephard just got on the "do not donate to these grifters" list along with the Salvos😒
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ladyalicentshightower · 8 months ago
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I think people overestimate how feminist team black is. If someone brings up how Baela should be the heir to Driftmark, it's always "she would've been Queen if not for the Greens!", ignoring that 1, she would be Queen consort, not a Queen in her own right, and 2 she has a legitimate claim in her own right to Driftmark. Team Black's goal is to crown Rhaenyra, but Rhaenyra becoming Queen isn't a win for feminism because it does nothing to dismantle the rest of the patriarchal system that exists in Westeros. From what we've gotten so far, it reads that Rhaenyra wants to be the exception and not the rule. Rhaenyra has made a lot of bad political decisions, which means she can't acknowledge Baela's claim because it would weaken her own claim (blatantly admitting her eldest sons are illegitimate would not end well for her to say the least). So she betrothes Jace and Luke to Baela and Rhaena to kind of atone for that, like as a consolation prize Baela will be Queen and Rhaena will be lady of Driftmark, neither of them would hold either title in their own right. It's good matches because the kids like each other and will treat each other well, but it's not a feminist win or a feministic liberation. It's usurpation, usurpation that takes place because Rhaenyra has to do damage control after having illegitimate children and after a serious of bad political decisions (both hers and her fathers, Viserys is the arbiter of this entire mess). To me, Rhaenyra is very reminiscent of Mary Queen of Scots, I can see a lot of elements drawn from Mary's history in Rhaenyra's story and character, down to their sons eventually taking the crown they failed to claim/keep.
#hotd#hotd spoilers#house of the dragon#house of the dragon spoilers#Rhaenyra targaryen critical#I'm going to do a rewatch prior to season 2 & I'm going to analyse the bad political decisions from vis & Rhaenyra that lead to the dance#like by no means the only factors at play lets not forget otto daemon larys etc#but it's an interesting factor that the fandom doesn't really acknowledge#and a lot of Rhaenyra's bad political decisions are understandable because of her youth and because viserys does fuck all to prepare her#like even if she wasn't who he choose as heir she should've been given a better political education as a princess#but vis fails his most of his other four kids in that regard to#i mean he also fails to acknowledge them or remember them but anyways#he is a huge part of the reason aegon and aemond became he they did#props to whoever probably alicent for sending daeron to oldtown so he could grow up well adjusted#alicent: i'm writing a letter to daeron is there anything you would like to say to him?#viserys: daemon? why are you writing to daemon?#alicent: daeron?#viserys: who?#alicent: our son? the one you sent to squire in oldtown?#viserys: i think i'd remember if we had a son who's name was one letter different to my brothers#viserys: in fact i do alicent do you mean the one who lost an eye?#alicent: *screaming internally*#viserys targaryen#king viserys#rhaenyra is such an interesting character but i hate how the fandom sanctified her because how dare characters be complex and have flaws#like you dont have to justify their actions or bend over backwards to deny their faults to like a character you know 😭#and the same thing is done to daemon who is far more fucked up and far more flawed in the show than the fandom allows#i hate the team stuff tho i get hbo going for it as a marketing move that was genius but my god are certain stans insufferable#the entire point of the dance is that its a pointless tragedy there's no good or bad side theyre both awful in their own ways#but thats a longer rant for another time outside of the tags
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roman-roy-apologist · 7 months ago
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i love you animal symbolism
#like obviously i’m the dog motif guy but literally any animal symbolism is sooooo#like mq animal symbolism >>>#sharks and mice and wolves and butterflies#what that says about you — not just what you get but what you wanted to get#i’m a shark and i’m going to take you down. he smells blood in the water he’s gonna kill my pig and there’s nothing i can do#because i’m soft i’m a kid again im a mouse and im loyal and humble and a real team player! and that’s what will be my downfall#but it’s also what’s going to save me#why would a mouse choose foam over a delicious cookie? i don’t know. why would he? why would i?#i just got a little upset when you said i wasn’t a lion. you’re nothing without me#lions hunt in packs they’re sthe leaders. but i’m telling you that you dont get a pack you dont get someone to lean on and you will always#be alone.#then succession animal symbolism is like: youre a scorpion and i’m a snake and we are going to die at each others hands#it’s already written. we know the ending#im a dog and i’m mean and sharp and vicious#i’m a dog and i’m loyal and trusting#i’m a dog and i need to be kicked and i beg you to kick me because it’s all i know#you come for me with love?#lock me in a cage and feed me dog food (or chocolate cake but who knows) and i’ll never eat again#send me away until everyone knows their place#beat me with a slipper in gstaad for ordering lobster because it’s rude to order the most expensive thing on the menu when you’re not payin#because dogs don’t get a sliver platter they get a bowl of dog food in a cold wire cage#they get the scraps and they thank you for it#so you come for me with love?#you come in here guns ablazing to find they’ve turned to fucking sausages and you come for me with love?#jeez that’s a lot of tags#mythic quest#mq#succession#succession hbo
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ikishima · 3 months ago
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Some losers are clogging the death note tags with AI art. DN fandom… please stop interacting with AI & hyping these people up. We have SO many talented artists constantly contributing to the flow of beautiful fanart free of charge. There is literally no fucking reason to generate DN fanart (unless you get a kick out of destroying the planet).
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The person I just saw doing this was also selling prints, it’s literally a grift at the expense of the planet & especially toward people living in areas that the climate catastrophe is affecting the most. Please do not waste your time, attention, or money on AI.
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fun-k-boards · 7 months ago
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Whenever people fail to understand that what we as an audience know is sometimes entirely different from what the characters know I get genuinely heated I need to put the phone down and just breathe in a serene forest or something because otherwise my blood pressure would get to a dangerous level
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gods-favorite-autistic · 8 months ago
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Hey yall im back with Fig and the Cig Figs professionally produced Freshman year album (formally known as Detention) track list:
Detention
Bad Kid
Dragonslayer
Sk8er Gurl (yes it is basically just a fantasy version of Sk8er Boy by Avril Lavigne)
Burn Towns Get Money
Pit Fiend
Corn Cuties
Disguise Self
Closed Book
Infodump
Seven Maidens
Every Album Needs A Bonus Track (yes that is the name of the song)
Here’s the Junior Year Track List in case you wanna see it!
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