#Why did you kill me michael sheen

[aziraphalalala]

I know Crowley is sex on legs and played by the irresistible David Tennant but HAVE YOU SEEN MICHAEL SHEEN’S AZIRAPHALE LOOK AT CROWLEY FONDLY AND SAY ”SMITTEN”??????

[mx-anthony-janthony-crowley]

david tennant's interview on this morning transcript (plus the new clip!!!) david: so i'm hell's representative on earth, michael sheen is heaven's representative on earth, put there to do the bidding of our respective head offices, but we found out that if we became mates and sort of helped each other out, it kinda cut out the workload, cancelled each other out... so we're best mates, but in series 1 we end up having to avert the apocalypse, which we managed to do but as a result of that we get cut off... so we're now living on earth as... as independent individuals

[so do you still need each other then?]

david: we still need each other - we've only got each other now! cause we don't have heaven and hell anymore

[cause you both love earth so much?]

david: oh we much prefer living on earth, because heaven's a bit stuffy and hell's awful

[so you conspire to thwart armageddon?]

david: exactly, we thwart armageddon and that's fine, but series 2 begins when the angel gabriel, jon hamm, who you just saw there, shows up at aziraphale (michael sheen's) bookshop, naked, with no memory holding a cardboard box... so suddenly we're locked into the politics of heaven and hell again, we don't know what's going on, we've got a mystery to solve... why is the angel gabriel here? the angel gabriel tried to kill us both at the end of the last series

[so now he's got amnesia and]

david: yes, he becomes like a weird child in this weird sort of eternal marriage that michael and i are locked in

NEW CLIP:

crowley: angel, this is the supreme archangel of all heaven.. your former boss, who tried very hard to cast you into hellfire and destroy you! he is not our friend!

aziraphale: i don't think he really has any friends! crowley: exactly!

aziraphale: yes, exactly... crowley: ...what does your exactly mean... exactly.... i feel like your exactly and my exactly are different exactlys... aziraphale: he doesn't have any friends, so he needs us! crowley: what i need is for HIM to be nowhere near me, and the precious, peaceful FRAGILE existence that i have carved out for myself here aziraphale: i thought we carved it out for OURSELVES? crowley: SO DID I!!

[zionworkzs]

Anyone ask for a needlessly long and emotional dissection of when and how Crowley and Aziraphale fell in love? No? Too bad.

I'm going to start with something controversial.

Aziraphale fell in love first.

To explain this, we gotta get a few things out of the way first.

FALLING in love and KNOWING you're in love are very different things. And the whole concept of LOVING someone and BEING IN LOVE are also different things.

Aziraphale LOVES Crowley from, well from before the Beginning. Because they are both angels and angels love. I would even accept the argument that Aziraphale LOVES Crowley throughout their flashback scenes before the Arrangement (because again, he is an angel).

The Arrangement is born out of a symbiotic want of Crowley and Aziraphale to fuck around and not do their jobs enjoy humanity.

It is my personal belief that Aziraphale FELL in love with Crowley in 1941 when he saves the books (not a hot take, I know).

He REALIZES he is in love with Crowley when he gets the Holy Water for him and the closest we get to that is this scene.

Aziraphale thinks that Crowley wants to use the Holy Water as some kind of last-ditch attempt to get out of trouble. He knows it will kill him, and is incredibly dangerous in general. But he does it anyway. Why? Because he knows Crowley would find a way to get it regardless (most likely some dangerous plan that will result in death or grave injury). At least this way Aziraphale can feel somewhat at peace with the knowledge that Crowley no longer needs to do something reckless to get what he wants. He overtly goes against Heaven in this act, and this is one of only a few times we see him do this to such a degree (see Job).

It is my personal belief, and I'm sorry to be this person, but I don't think that Crowley was IN LOVE with Aziraphale in this scene or in any before it (def well on his way, but we'll get there).

I think that Crowley was still hopelessly intrigued by this angel who did fantastical things, like drink and eat and immerse himself in the aspects of humanity he adored.

And another controversial take I have is that the "you go too fast for me" is not Aziraphale saying he recognizes Crowley's feelings and his own and that Crowley is too fast for him in that respect. Because again, I don't think Crowley is IN LOVE with Aziraphale here.

I think Aziraphale is saying you go too fast for me, you treat life like a speedrun to get to the good parts. Hell, Crowley slept through the 19th century because he wanted time to move forward. Aziraphale recognizes this. He's in love with this demon who won't slow down and appreciate the mundane, human things that Aziraphale treasures. He goes too fast. He never settles down.

(I could do a whole analysis on this scene, but we'd be here till GO Season 3 came out)

I also could accept the argument that Azi realizes he is in love in this scene here when he hesitates before saying friends (Michael Sheen I'm in your walls what the hell was this shit).

Because it does make sense that this is the first time we really see Aziraphale say what they are. But he hesitates so much. Keep in mind this happens AFTER the whole book saving incident. Does he hesitate because holy shit the person I like just did something really sweet and I see them in a new light? Possibly. I still think that Aziraphale deciding to give Crowley the Holy Water was his declaration. But I could be swayed.

Crowley is different in this respect. Contrary to popular belief, I think Crowley falls in love with Aziraphale slowly. So slowly that he doesn't even recognize it as being IN LOVE until it's pointed out by Nina.

Because he falls in love slowly, it's hard to pinpoint an exact scene where he is FALLING IN LOVE. I think throughout the first season (and before when the two are meeting up semi-regularly), when he and Aziraphale are trying to co-parent Warlock and the subsequent hunt for the real antichrist is the clearest I can get to him being IN LOVE.

(Putting this gif in because holy shit, I mean, fuck, bro)

Let me explain.

Until this point (the handful of years prior to and during S1), he and Aziraphale were ships passing in the night. Crowley liked the mystery, the excitement of seeing the angel every so often. Got joy out of teasing him. But this is when Aziraphale becomes more than that. He becomes more of a constant in Crowley's life. And ever since his Fall Crowley has craved stability. A safe place to land. He changes his hair, his clothes, his accent. But Aziraphale doesn't. He just... is. He is constant, mostly unchanging, and still endlessly intriguing.

Crowley is IN LOVE with Aziraphale when he realizes that Aziraphale isn't going anywhere (yet). Crowley can rely on him. And for Crowley, that's something he's never had before.

Crowley LOVES Aziraphale. And he is IN LOVE with Aziraphale, but I genuinely don't think he recognizes it until he could lose him. (He's always been a bit dramatic; it would follow that his realizations only occur under dire circumstances).

Here, when he feels he is losing Aziraphale, Crowley does the one thing he never has before: says what he's feeling. Granted, it's sandwiched by a sassy one-liner and being shit at communication. But it's there.

And I think that he thinks, it's a fluke. One moment of weakness.

But then it happens again. When he's losing Aziraphale. And he can't say anymore. He's done his speech, he's thrown out the nightingales. There's nothing for it.

He KNOWS he is IN LOVE with Aziraphale when he's losing him.

[crowleysgirl56]

Hi, your post about "How did we go from “There must be something I can do for you” to “You go too fast for me Crowley”." made me remember something I have thought about many times and you seem like a good person to mention this to. Maybe it was already talked about in the fandom? I don't know.

So, can we talk about how Aziraphale goes between calling Crowley evil and calling him kind and not evil? He often says things like "I've always said that you are a kind person.", or "None of this would have been possible if you weren't just a little bit of a good person." (I'm paraphrasing.) But then he says, like in the Scotland minisode: "I am good, you, I'm afraid, are evil." I know that we were sad when he said in the last episode "You are the bad guys", but he kind of said things like that in the past already? And it was especially noticeable because in the next minisode, he said "If you truly were as evil as you like to paint yourself..." like, hello, isn't this a bit contradictory? (I know that different people wrote each minisode, but still.)

Anyway, sorry to ramble in your mailbox, just wanted to finally write this down and ask if anyone has noticed it and has any thoughts.

Thanks for the interesting thoughts. Aziraphale is such a complex character, and the subtext behind why he says certain things can sometimes be a little difficult to parse. I’d say a lot of it comes from being scared and traumatised by Heaven, and probably at first from believing the things he says out of habit (much earlier on), and then later on saying them more of a disguise to his true feelings?

That casual “you’re the bad guys” line from the final 15 just kills me though. Everything else can be explained away as him protecting Crowley or keeping him safe but the actual delivery of that line, still makes it seem like he believes what he says and I just don’t know how to take that (can someone’s pleas ask Michael Sheen what he was thinking in that moment?!). I know it’s been spoken about in great detail by other people and I think any thought I have will not match up with a lot of people, so I’ve tried to steer clear of specific thoughts about the final 15. This is why I look forward to season 3 because I want to see what the answer given is. And if it’s satisfying compared to everything else I’ve seen.

I’ve probably rambled on a lot here myself too, but thank you for the ask!

[inhonoredglory]

Hey, I reaaally love all your meta analysis, especially the one on Aziraphale's morality. You truely have a wonderful writing style! And you expressed the feelings I had about the S2 finale I couldn't put into words and had me in tears again. I never really believed in the coffee theory (although a part of me hoped for it since it would be way less painful). But there is one thing I can't wrap my head around. The coffee theory is partly supported by the final scene of Aziraphale in the elevator and his creepy smile. Even when he looks forward to his new position and is convinced he does the right thing, I can't believe he wouldn't smile like that (and Michael Sheen is to talented for it being am accident). He still lost his soulmate Crowley, he still had to give up the life he loved so dearly and we know how much he struggled with that in the first place talking to Metatron. So why this smile, which aside from that, really did not look like him? I fear, that his memories were wiped out in this elevator. But since you have so a great understanding of Aziraphale's character, I would like to know your theories about that? Thanks a lot!!

(In response to my meta on why Aziraphale had to go to Heaven)

Thank you so much for your kind words, @sabotage-on-mercury (truly means the world to me). Honestly, the creepy smile was one part of the ending I couldn't quite put my finger on either, until someone pointed out on a Twitter response to my meta:

The reason why its scary is bc azi is becoming properly angry at the system and is 101% determined to set things right (Source)

In season 1, Aziraphale was determined not to kill anyone to stop the Apocalypse. He wouldn't even tell Crowley where the Antichrist was, because Crowley's only solution was to kill him.

And because Crowley consistently didn't have any ideas ("not one single better idea??"), Aziraphale took it on himself to pursue the only option left––to ask God to intervene and stop both Heaven and Hell from destroying Earth. Therefore, Aziraphale had to keep the integrity of his angel status by distancing himself from Crowley, while the world was still in danger.

Despite this dedication avoid bloodshed, when God didn't have an answer, Aziraphale went against one of his core beliefs to help save the world. He was willing to murder a child.

For Aziraphale, that takes guts. And (seeing how he reacted at the end of the Job minisode), I wonder that if he had killed Adam Young, Aziraphale would have checked himself into Hell.

Going to Heaven for Aziraphale is ultimately a conscious choice, one that he is clearly afraid of. We see him constantly steeling himself again the Metatron in the end, covering his fear and hurt from losing Crowley with a placid smile and a flippant attitude. He's wearing so many masks, to Crowley, to himself, to the Metatron...

All season we've seen him playing roles (detective, magician, doctor, landlord). But the final role is warrior. Going up that elevator, we first see Aziraphale's eyes searching, worried, panicking, but unable to show it because he's not in a safe space. He swallows, blinks, he's breathing hard (you can see his entire shoulders rise and fall).

But as he goes up, his expression steels. He's quite literally putting on a mask (to himself): a vengeful, hardened expression of pure anger and rage (to drown out the fear and uncertainty he so clearly still has).

Michael Sheen conveying contained anger in both Good Omens and Masters of Sex (gif by @julielilac)

Cuz this isn't just him scrambling to kill a kid, this is him walking calmly and knowingly into sacrificing everything he loves most (Crowley, the bookshop, his entire life on earth) to create a world that will always be safe for him and Crowley and humanity for the rest of time. Where he would have to go up against the most powerful angels, the Metatron, and God Themself to change things. He can't be the kind, sweet angel he was on Earth. That won't cut it in Heaven if he wants to make a difference in any real way.

He wanted to do it with Crowley, with the love and support and strength of his demon. But without him, Aziraphale has to channel something else to keep his resolve afloat.

Something he had when he was a warrior, fighting on the front lines of a battle between Heaven and Hell, when he very likely led a platoon into divine fields of bloodshed before the earth was born. When he was an avenging angel.

I haven’t done this since the Great War.

It was a time and an identity he had chosen to leave behind, because it wasn't the kind of angel he was anymore ("I'm not fighting in any war!"). In this context, you can read Aziraphale's passionate unwillingness to take a life (his pacifism) directly into his past experience as a warrior. It is often the veterans of terrible wars who are the most earnest advocates for peace. (And especially in Britain and Europe, where the violence of the world wars is still such a powerful and painful national memory.)

As he goes up the elevator, he's breathing so hard we can hear it mirrored in the soundtrack, and he is so hyperfocused on steeling himself that he doesn't even care that the Metatron is watching him. He doesn't rest until he's psyched himself into that warrior mindset necessary to carry out this mission entirely by himself, to be both the moral advocate and the uncompromising leader of angels who had intimidated him his entire life. To demand respect and to talk to the very face of God and tell Them they are Wrong.

(Please read this Neil-approved meta for further thoughts on God and Aziraphale.)

That creepy smile is clearly not there because Aziraphale is happy to fall into a toxic parent's false love. There's no comfort or wistful nostalgia in that face. There's no "it'll be so much nicer" in that smile. It's not a happy smile. It's an I'm-gonna-fuck-shit-up smile.

Because it's a warrior's smile before they go into battle, before they put on that armor and, for a while, become something they're not in the name of some greater good. He's fucking furious and it's downright frightening.

Because I have no doubt that the angel Aziraphale we get in Season 3 is the angel Aziraphale who can say this:

He's not there yet in the TV show. But this bravery, this anger, this flaming rage is how it starts.

Or as he's described in the book when Aziraphale mysteriously does away with the local mafia:

Just because you’re an angel doesn’t mean you have to be a fool.

[tonydaddingham]

✨ episode 1/2 - running commentary✨

- ok so im slightly disappointed that it's the eps i watched in the screening BUT IM DETERMINED TO LOVE IT ANYWAY SO WE REMAIN OPTIMISTIC AND WE MOVE~~

- angel crowley is so young and innocent my poor boy he's been through so much

- like now im watching it, it feels like putting it in a cinema was a Bad Choice and maybe that's why I didn't like it??? it feels way more authentic and cosy on tv

- im sorry but crowley sounds like such an old man in the park scene, "frozen peas... it's good for them too🙂"

- seriously this is so much more palatable on tv format i can't get over it

- OH MAGGIE I LOVE YOU

- aziraphale god bless ur little cotton socks

- god crowley's legs got me SWEATIN

- ugh crowleys hand in the cafe is so FRUITY

- lmao "purely selfish action" aziraphale is so self aware and I love it

- no im sorry but goob is the fucking star of the show you cannot change my mind but dialogue and delivery wise he is currently CARRYING

- Dartmoor mention had me creasing, that's literally on my doorstep

- aziraphale's bitchy ass face then he sits down in the backroom honestly watered my crops and healed nature

- okay im sorry but the dialogue is still a little off for me I won't lie💀

- beelzebub's accent is just 😘👌 perfect, but equally feel like they'd be perfect in a production of oliver

- god believe me i feel for nina but... I... do not like her, and they are NOT suited for each other at all

- I LEARNT MY PASSION IN THE GOOD OLD FASHIONED SCHOOL OF LOVER BOYS

- that dance is so low effort I'm sorry it should have been the macarena or cha cha slide

- crowley's bow tho is so hot he's so graceful he looks like a swan

- and yeah the refs to the other years that aziraphale did the dance is GIVING ME HEART PALPITATIONS ugh

- he and goob are like cats on a hot tin roof like IMMEDIATE hissing vibes

- lmao ok so that episode does end there then... such a weird ending im sorry but yeah let's fully retract the alternate episode theory (but @prime you need to hire me for s3 just a thought bc 👀)

- anyway ep2 I'm sorry but the angelic herald speech thing is cute and funny but also so cringe hmmm

- gabriel is lord farquaad ugh

- I HAVE TO REMEMBER THIS IS A COMEDY UGH but i miss the slightly serious undertones in s1 sob god I hope they come back later on

- UGH THE TURTLENECK🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵

- shax is mommy I don't make the rules

- I noted it in the screening but angel wings for earrings, Maggie????

- nice job on the lie aziraphale well done once again making excellent choices you're so smart and valid (utter moron)

- "SOUNDS A BIT UNLIKELY" LMAO GET FUCKED CROWLEY

- oh goob you really are going through it my bby I love u

- crowley's face after may god forgive you KILLS ME this scene is honestly the stand out one in both ep1 and ep2 if you ask me

- TY TY TY god bless u but you also make me so uncomfortable

- jobs youngest kid truly gives me life

- lmao the fact that aziraphale does actually recognise when crowley tempts him is hilarious tho bc he just conveniently disregards it by the bench scene in s1 hmmm character development or character regression WHO KNOWS

- ok no I'm sorry but the mukbang scene is so unnecessary and uncomfortable

- "whack the kids" honestly the best line of this scene imo, but upon reflection and rewatching it, crowley's demeanour is rather heartbreaking whilst he's reclined getting ratted

- FRANCES FRANCES FRANCES ✨💓

- 'but just to be able to ask the question' UGH CROWLEY STOP

- lmao shoemaking and obstetrics what a combo god bless

- THEY CAN ARRIVE AT ANY SIZE lmao and Michael is too sharp for their own good... but I do hate that gabriel is utterly inept, he came across as cruel and calculating if a little ignorant in s1 but not this comedically stupid

- "yes I bloody am" TY MY LOVE

- Michael sheen and David Tennant deserve nominations for the children swap scene alone, imo the strongest bit of acting in the ep im sorry 'you have my word as an angel' KILL ME

- why is nina obsessed with crowley, like I get it babes but also why

- THEY ARE SO MARRIED MT PARTNER AND I ARGUE OVER THE CAR ALWAYS "our car" LMAO 💀💀💀

- ✨✨✨IT WAS A NICE DAY, ALL THE DAYS HAD BEEN NICE✨✨✨

- ok the rock scene is so much more emotional on tv, so much better

OKAY RIGHT EP3 LETS HAVE ITTTTT

[ingravinoveritas]

Have you seen this?

(Grouping these together since they are related.)

So, I have indeed seen Georgia's Insta stories from today, of which there were several. I'll put up some screenshots of the ones @mythicalgallery mentioned for those who might not have seen them:

These stories came first, of a photo of David with Elliot Levey (who was his co-star in Good and is, I believe, also godfather to at least one of David and Georgia's children), and who could probably make a killing moonlighting as a Michael Sheen lookalike. Apparently a lot of people thought the same thing, going by the volume of comments on Twitter and people also replying to Georgia's story, which she subsequently took a screenshot of and posted.

That then brings us to the story in @climb-dtennant-like-a-tree's screenshot. What's strange to me is that Georgia posted another picture of she and David (both of which were presumably taken in the car on their way to or home from their outing last night) with his face not covered (posting side by side for comparison):

So I'm not entirely sure why she chose to censor the second picture, although I've seen numerous theories abound. One that seems particularly common is people saying that she didn't want people to make her picture be about him, which is interesting to me because all of Georgia's pictures that she takes with David are about him, whether he's the focal point of the photo/video or not. He is there to generate engagement, because she knows that is what people want to see, and that photos of her with him have many more interactions than those that do not.

I've also seen some folks saying that perhaps David did not want to be photographed by a one-woman paparazzo and she is respecting his privacy, but to my mind, if that were truly the case she would not have taken or posted the pic at all. My feeling, then, is that David either looked pissed off or was making a weird face and Georgia did not want that to detract from the shot, so censored his face. This isn't far out of character for her, either, as she also censored Michael's face in another Insta story from last month.

For me, however, the interesting timing of today was not anything to do with these stories, but rather Georgia posting another story (a picture of David with Birdie) right after AL posted the video of Michael and Lyra. It's hard to say how much of this was coordinated or planned, but given how many times this has happened, it makes me wonder if they are posting these things for entertainment, just to see the fans freak out and praise them for it. I've mentioned previously how Georgia and AL remind me of the girls who used to bully me in high school, and this reminds of one particular facet of their behavior. In Georgia and AL's case, it's doing things to get a reaction/a rise out of the fans and then making fun of the fans for it. I fully acknowledge that I have no way to know this for sure, but that is the feeling that I get.

But yes, those are my thoughts on Georgia's story censoring David's face/all of the assorted Insta stories from today. I would be curious to know what my followers think of all this as well...

[marchentraume]

Hi uh, I'm just gonna list out my Michael Sheen and David Tennant crossover ships with short headcanons and why lol:

Miles Maitland and Ginger Littlejohn (Bright Young Things)

They both existed in the same project before even knowing who the other ways ofc I ship it

Beautiful and full of life Miles balances out the serious Ginger, the latter can make sure Miles is safe from anyone who would hurt him

This one is probably my fave and have been slowly getting more invested, shout out to my kindred spirits who also have a galaxy brain for these two

Martin Whitly (Prodigal Son) and Alec Hardy (Broadchurch)

This might just be copying hannigram but I haven't watch Hannibal yet so no clue here haha

Martin is quite literally a criminal but also very educated, he would see Alec and want to save him realizing there's one person he wants to keep safe if not contained and away from the world

Alec is perplexed how such an educated man can do what he did but also attracted to both sides he shows

This isn't a healthy ship but why would I be into shipping for only that :D

Romeo and Romeo (Romeo and Juliet)

Both have played Romeo once in their respective lives and maybe I just want them to kiss

It's nothing deeper than that, both are INCREDIBLY gorgeous in their productions and I wish more photos existed...

Aro (Twilight series) and Peter Vincent (Fright Night 2011)

(yes this is a remake)

Vampire and "vampire hunter"? That's all I need.

You know Aro would love teasing the supposed cowardly Pete but surprisingly turned on when he he stands up to fight back

Of course the angst for Peter gaining attraction for a creature that killed his family

The sex would be insane you know it

I'm sure I'll build up more as I continue the brain rot but also let me know yours or any additional HCs with these ships I love...sheen and tennant...

[theonevoice]

Kill me right now, I cannot casually rewatch an old show and hear Michael Sheen actually saying THAT line.

Neil Gaiman why did you do this to us.

[aceofwhump]

(Go2 spoilers)

THE LAST EPISODE? opinions about the episode?

SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT!!! Mildly incoherent keyboard smashing below

OH MY GOD!!!

I AM HEARTBROKEN!!! I was crying during the entire end scene!!!! Legitimately sobbing sitting on the edge of my, mouth hanging open in shock!

But it's like a good heartbroken? Okay so first of all I fucking love angst. I think that's pretty obvious here lol. So watching all the angst between the two of them in last few minutes was a delicious kind of heartbreaking! And I fully plan on making gifs especially of Aziraphale's angsty face. Cause god its beautiful.

And David Tennant and Michael Sheen are just so so amazing at their jobs and their acting during that scene was PHENOMENAL. They had me on the edge of my seat, crying like a heartbroken teenager. It takes a lot to get me to react like that to a show especially lately but David and Michael destroyed me.

And I personally think this is AMAZING writing/plotting. Of course this will on depend on Amazon giving us season 3 so everyone better watch the crap out of this season okay! Because season 2 focused a lot on Crowley and his realizations of feelings so I'm expecting season 3 will see Aziraphale let go of this picture of Heaven = Good and Hell = Bad thing and realize he loves Crowley and wants to be with him forever and the teo of them will talk and apologize and work things out and end up in the cottage in South Downs. That's the ending I'm sure we'll get. But we need to get there and there was bound to be angst on the way. This kind of angst feels so in character to me and feels right. Not all things are happy all the time and sometimes angst is good for plot development. This is GOOD ANGST! This will further the plot, create a viable route for character development that will inevitably give us our happy ending!

I know a lot of people are upset by it in like an angry why kind of way but I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT A LOT!

And a few random thoughts:

I never pictured Crowley being the first to make a move and I was so proud of him for putting himself out there and asking Aziraphale to stay with him and they can just be an us and then going further and showing his feelings by kissing him! It was beautiful and deep and scary and wonderful and I DIED! And his face and body language after Aziraphale did the thing was SO HEARTBREAKING! DAVID AND MICHAEL ARE SO GOOD AT THEIR JOBS!

And Aziraphale! Oh my god this angel is killing me! All he wants is to be with Crowley! He didn't give a shit about the Metatrons offer until he said Aziraphale could make Crowley an angel again and they could be together. Look at his smile in that scene! That made him so happy! He could be with Crowley and they could go home and be good angels again! In his head thats the perfect ending! They would be home together, doing good work and Crowley could make things again and ask his questions without fear of retaliation. Aziraphale remembers how happy Crowley was at the beginning, making his stars and galaxies, and believes Crowley wants that again. He also always believed in Crowley's goodness AND Aziraphale is still stuck in the belief of Heaven and angels being inherently good and the good guys while Hell and Demons are inherently evil and the bad guys. So he still believes that they should both be up in Heaven.

But Crowley knows the truth! Crowley sees that both sides are toxic and that for the two of them to be happy they need to be just the two of them like they have been these past few years. And they were happy! So he tries to get that through Aziraphale but Aziraphale isn't ready to hear that.

THEN THE KISS HAPPENS AND AZIRAPHALE ISN'T READY FOR IT AND HE ENDS UP BREAKING CROWLEYS HEART EVEN THOUGH AZIRAPHALE DOES LOVE HIM AND YOU CAN SEE HIS HEARTBROKEN CONFUSED AND IN LOVE FACE AFTER CROWLEY LEAVES AND AZIRAPHALE TOUCHES HIS OWN LIPS!!!

I AM FUCKING DYING NONNY!!! I'M DYING!!! IM LOSOMG MY MIND AND I KNOW THERE ARE OTHERS THINGS I WANTED TO TALK ABOUT. IT I CANNOT THINK STRAIGHT!!!

[rollforjackass]

GOOD OMENS S2E5 STUFF

TEN THOUSAND?????? FUCK OFF

THE BALL!!!!!!! THE BALL THE BALL IT'S TIME FOR THE BALL!!!!!!!!

1965 doctor who annual -- HE GAVE AWAY A BOOK FOR GAY LOVE I'M GOING TO SCREAM

"my beloved spouse" this whole street is queer where do i sign the lease

PUT. THE FEZ. BACK.

crowley being goofy with the crystal ball

shax this look for you. milf

ERIC!!!!!!!!! LOVE OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!! HE'S MADE IT BACK FOR ANOTHER SEASON!!!!!!!!!!!

crowley is So disappointed in his persistent attempts at french

"you've been together long?" CROWLEY I SAW YOU SWALLOW ON THAT

"other people's love lives always seem so much more straightforward than our own" crowley i'm going to fucking rip my own head off

OH MY GOD SHE FUCKING KILLED ERIC

well that's a terribly romantic little set-up with the rose in the vase and vine with fairy lights

"smitten. :)" michael sheen i can't do this with you anymore

crowley why are you being so ominous about this. why all the wine. what is going on

DON'T FUCKING REVEAL TO GABRIEL THAT YOU SWITCHED PLACES WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU???????? HE HAS A HARD TIME FORGETTING THINGS?????????

"but, i was there. and i do remember, oh very clearly, the look on your face, Archangel Gabriel, when you told my only friend to shut his stupid mouth and die. and i. did not. care. for it."

JUMP OUT OF THAT WINDOW????????????????????????????????????

OH

Jim's Mug

there it is!!!!!!! the infamous Wait And See!!!!!!

JANE AUSTEN HOURS IN THIS MOTHERFUCKER HELLLLLLL YEAH

bitch i'm about to cry over this ball i can fucking feel it in my bones

oh please don't crash the ball, please please please. we deserve some dancing

DON'T YOU TOUCH MAGGIE YOU FUCKS

everyone talking like jane austen :( aziraphale means well but he's making people uncomfortable

motherfucker's making googoo eyes bc he wants to be dancing like that with crowley i fucking Know It

my darling magic shop owner's partner in the yellow dress, i owe you my life

WHILE WE DANCE????????

the fact that crowley knows the steps to this dance even though he's not under the same spell as everyone else :')

THE BOOKSHOP IS AN INDEPENDENT EMBASSY

"you came to me. i said i would protect you, and i will." "you don't need to. i'm going out." IN FULL ELTON JOHN REGALIA

I'M GOING TO BREAK SOMETHING

aziraphale's general look of fucking ANGER at her threats, we've never seen him like that before

aziraphale running to the back of the bookshop to panic where no one can see him -- MAGGIE MY LOVE STAYING TO HELP HIM

crowley and our darling seamstress are iconic

"you're a good lad" "i'm not actually. either." FUCKING SCREAMING MY HEAD OFF

"we aren't in danger! crowley will be back in a moment, he will have a plan." "why don't you stand up for yourself, make your own plans?" "oh i am. but rescuing me makes him so happy."

YESSSSS THE CROWLEY TEAM-UP WITH MURIEL IT'S EVERYTHING I'VE EVER DREAMED

[themistymountainscold]

i just watched unthinkable (2010) staring michael sheen, carrie-ann moss and samuel l jackson. i highly recommend it. the film is r18+ and extremely graphic in terms of torture.

talking about it under the cut for anyone interested.

just holy shit. the acting was phenomenal. if i was sitting i'd have been on the edge of my seat.

the only thing i can't get behind in the ending. why have all this lead up, about the bombs, then the secret 4th bomb, yusuf just straight up shooting himself (that scared the absolute shit out of me i was not prepared for that) then for just... the movie to end? what happend to the bombs. did they disable them? did the forth one go off?

but omg i'm deeply attracted to michael sheen guys. i know he was being tortured but bro. fuck he's hot. and he knows it. anyway.

he's a fucking genius. he knows this and he isn't afraid to show it. getting the military and fbi to blow up the mall was brilliant. he's bad and killed 53 people i know. but you can really see how planned out this was. it really unerved me how "prepared" he was for the torture. he would scream and scream and then just "i deserve this, i'm prepared."

and even though he was so fucked up, his family was his only tipping point. whatever happned to him didn't matter. but his kids? bro just shit.

chilling.

also samuel l jackson as h. the licenced torturer. just wow. i don't even have much to say about it. like when he killed yusuf's wife? i audibly gasped.

just wow. i highly recommened it though. it was just wfgshfoukghfiuhgf

[bish-plz-haha]

SPOILERS AHEAD

I have many thoughts about GO(2) and I need to sort them all out (in no particular order) and I'm reading through tumblr and everything else and I got so many thoughts and theories I've seen that I absolutely love and I want to list them all (if I can find corresponding posts, I will link them—Sorry in advance for the amount of links in this post: read at your own will). So, without further ado:

There's a lot of theories out there about who Angel Crowley���️ might be but I think my money is on Lucifer. Perhaps Samael, maybe Raphael, but my heart says Lucifer. In a way, though, I kinda hope that we dont get his God Given name because, as a nonbinary/trans leaning person, it makes me happy that he chose a name for himself instead of living with his given name.

"Class-A surreptitious miracle." In which, its actually not surreptitious because, as much as they tried to make it the most fractional, insubstantial miracle, it was powerful enough to bring back the dead 25x over, and I think it definitely scared The Metatron (dick) enough to want to see to it personlly that they were separated- "a miracle only the mightiest of Archangels could have performed" Shax said (which also adds to the Lucifer theory to me tbh).

Crowley knows how evil heaven actually is. But he doesn't give Aziraphale this information. I think in fear of hurting his angel. But this lack of information is what also helped Zira make his decision to go back to heaven. Which also leads me into saying that for his overall character arc through s1 & s2, this ending makes a lot of sense for Zira. Especially because he doesnt have all the information that Crowley has. If Crowley had told him what he knows, I think it might've been a different outcome.

Beelzebub is like, "hey, if you can find my husband (which no one knows until that ending [I've been crying for years]), I'll give you anything you want; you can be a prince run Hell" and Crowley is like, "no thanks, I got my husband, his bookshop and my car and plants. I'm happy thanks." (Which is kinda a lie).

Also, the way everyone refers to Beez so easily as They. I am so delighted that a large piece of media makes they/them pronouns a normal thing and not something that's like, overly questioned/talked about. Its just... normal.

SAME WITH THE GAYS!

Also, the ability to put almost any character in GO on the aro/ace spec and it's probably canon (I personally believe Crowley and Aziraphale are romantic beings with/for each other, but they're both Ace.)

I absolutely am ecstatic that love is love and no one questions that Zira did a "miracle" to make two women fall in love; especially in a series based upon Christianity. I didnt grow up with a religion really, but I love it. I have family that say their Christian's and dont like me so much anymore as I'm gender nonconforming. (Whoops! Not sorry.)

Michael Sheen is king of subtly and micro-expressions and I have seen a post that is talking about it and I would love for it to be true: if you watch, just after Crowley pulls away from the kiss, something changes in Aziraphale's expression, just for a split second, and I would love for it to be them switching places (again) and for Crowley to be going to Heaven and raising a little hell. (Though I know its PROBABLY not true, this theory has so much on it.)

I love how good omens 2 shows us the destruction miscommunication can cause. I think this is why in this day and age, so many people are divorcing. And this show shows it beautifully. Crowley and Aziraphale both say things the other takes in the completely wrong way. But also. I'm gonna cry for years about this divorce (its sadder than when my parents split)

Ty Tennant really showed up to set, said "watch this", basically eyefucked Aziraphale/Michael Sheen, and showed his father how to be a proper gay. And I love it.

Not to mention that Ty Tennant's Grandfather played his father, Job, while his father plays a "gay" demon "trying" to kill him.

"Our car" and "our bookshop".

I love how Nina and Maggie represent Crowley and Aziraphale. But it's not the way you think: it's so misleading. Nina at first glance is Crowley and Maggie is Aziraphale. But that is not true. Its actually the other way around. And here is a post explaining it more.

I'm loving that s1 we see Crowley as a nanny. And s2 brings us Crowley the shoemaker AND a midwife. Its... hilarious??

I love how Good Omens inserts the book, Good Omens, into series 2. Like, break the fourth wall why dont you?

Crowley hasn't fallen from grace as much as he wants people to believe. He lies, yes, but he does so much good. Barely does any "evil" on his own (that's all humans).

"I go along with hell/heaven as far as I can" is such a strong way to describe these two characters actions. Zira does what he thinks is morally right and Crowley just... does his thing. I think Aziraphale didnt want to though (as we see in the minisode of ep2) but after some thousand years, he became okay with it really. Or pretended to himself long enough to believe it himself. Crowley though doesnt give a fuck and doesn't really care if he really followed along in "Hell's plans".

That kiss is so devastating and full of desperation and everything on the side of it. It's also loving. But in the completely wrong way because its Crowley's last-ditch attempt to get Aziraphale to stay—to be with him. To be an Us.

Crackship! Crackship! Crackship! CRACKSHIP!!!!!

ANGEL WITH A WHEELCHAIR!! ANGEL. WITH. A. WHEELCHAIR. ANGEL WITH A WHEELCHAIR. ANGEL WITH A WHEELCHAIR!!!!!!!!!!

[spacelessbian]

Good Omens S2: review-ish

I saw Good Omens and I honestly don't know what to think. Spoilers ahead. These are my first thoughts and I'm writing it immediately after finishing episode 6, so I will ruminate some more but I wanted to get my thoughts out right now, as some sort of brainstorming.

I am bummed to say that I did not enjoy this new story as much as I enjoyed season 1. Now obviously there is a huuuge difference in watching an adaptation of a story you know well and already love and watching an entirely new thing. But still.

When it comes to the overal plot I did enjoy the Gabriel mystery, at least for about half of the season. It lost steam around the middle and the ending of it... I'm sorry, I do not buy Gabriel falling in love with anyone for one second. Maybe if it wasn't shown in one big info dump and there was time to explore his connection with Beelzebub, I would have enjoyed it better. But Gabriel was such a brilliant asshole in season 1. Amazing even. I loved to hate him and this turnaround did not work for me at all. The fact that I didn't connect with the new actress in the role of Beelzebub probably did not help (obviously I have nothing against the actress personally, she was not bad). So this storyline ended in a disappointment for me. I also cringed a bit ngl. (important to note: I have previously read fanfics for Gabriel/Beelzebub and liked them, so it is not just about this pairing in itself).

Aziraphale and Crowley on the other hand, I enjoyed very much. The whole season is basically a love story, an explicit one this time. Part of me thought - I will admit - that Neil Gaiman just wanted to stop the constant barrage of fans demanding explicit gay sex on screen, but okay, I'll allow it, it was sweet (until it wasn't, then it was heart-wrenching). Both David Tennant and Michael Sheen are in absolute top form and I loved every second of them doing stuff.

The little (and not so little) scenes (or mini episodes) were interesting and fun to watch, the Job story was especially really good. I did not expect to see Crowley as an angel, he was so sweet building nebulas. I could have done without the zombie Nazis... Maybe someone will explain to me why it was necessary to basically stop the story for it, I did not understand it while watching. I expected them to pop up later or something... But no, they are just zombie Nazis. I liked the processing sequence in Hell of that episode, though, it looked very cool and fun, especially the... firewarmer (???).

That brings me to Miranda Richardson. God, I've had a crush on her for about fifteen years now and Shax definitely did not stop that. I loved her so much! She looked fantastic, her dialogue was great and I liked her dynamic with Crowley. I don't understand why would she be offered a position of Duke of Hell, seeing she fucked up everything she was assigned to do, but I can excuse that detail. I hope we see a lot of her in season 3 (which we must get!).

My other gay crush, Archangel Michael, was in a lot of scenes and I'm not complaining. I think her position as possibly the only angel who thinks for themselves (at times) and who is just constantly surrounded by confident idiots while also being an idiot (but not as much) was just great. More of this please.

The other angels were okay. Muriel is a baby ray of sunshine cupcake darling cutie and if anything happens to her, I will kill anyone responsible and then myself. The other demons were not as important, but I must mention Dagon's robe (? coat? uniform?) which fucks verily.

Maggie and Nina did not make as much impact as I thought they would and I didn't care much about their romance tbh. I know, I know, it is supposed to mirror Aziraphale/Crowley but like... I don't see it. Sorry. The ball scene was weird as hell. I appreciated the seamstress joke, a very nice nod to Pratchett.

And I now see that I just started listing characters instead of talking about the whole thing but I suppose this is how my brain works. I can't wait to read and watch everyone else's opinions and reviews. Despite me not being very happy at the end of the show I enjoyed most of it and I truly hope we will get season 3 to tie the bow.

[peakyblindersxx]

Hello love. Can I request a Michael Grey headcannon where he’s smitten with the reader. Ty!

adore you - michael gray x reader

gif by @michaelgreys (this definitely inspired this fic, so ty!!! you’re amazing)

a/n: ok sooo this kinda got out of hand. but i’m not mad about it? there is absolutely no plot thank u very much but i hope you enjoy it as much as i did :) i’m working on p5 to whiskey business as well as some other requests after this! 

love, abi xxx

my masterlist

warnings: nsfw!! smut, fluff, slight power play, mentions of spanking, cocky!michael being hot af

You’d lost track of time, the shadows waxing and waning through the curtains of Michael’s spacious townhouse. When you’d first met him, you’d known he was different, leaning against a wall in the back of the Garrison, sending a smirk your way, cigarette smoke wafting from his lips  as your best mate chattered on with Isaiah, discussing which club was the best to attend on weekends. You weren’t paying much attention to the conversation, eyes fixed on the glaringly attractive man standing silently at the edges of your vision. Michael stepped closer to you, noticing the way your mouth curled at the edges when his gaze met yours. He had asked you out the same night, after more than a few whiskeys, of course. You accepted the invitation, his quiet intelligence peaking your curiosity. He was blunt, witty, and charming beyond belief, let alone more handsome than anyone your age. You could feel yourself falling for him fast, but was it so wrong? He cared, and made sure you knew it. Never mind the family name, and all the drama that came with it. Michael was yours, and you were his.

Currently, he was making sure this would be something you wouldn’t forget, tongue lapping at your cunt as his nose nudged at your clit, using his hands as leverage to keep your hips at bay. 

“Jesus fuckin’ Christ, Michael,” you swore, legs quivering as he continued his assault on your core, letting up only to poke his tongue out between his perfectly pink lips, swirling it across your clit, making you cry out and grip his hair, runing the way he’d combed it this morning. He didn’t care, groaning into your core at the sight of you writhing in pleasure on the bed, the sheets soft beneath your skin. God, you looked so fucking irresistable all riled up just for him, he thought to himself.

“Not God, just Michael.” He tore his mouth from you for a second, breathing heavily as he grinned cheekily up at you, lips glistening with your juices. You rolled your eyes, smiling, as he resumed his position, your eyelids squeezing shut with pleasure. 

“Fuck, m’gonna-” You couldn’t finish your sentence, hips bucking wildly at the feeling of his tongue fucking in and out of you while his thumb pressed light circles into your clit. Your moans echoed off the walls, causing him to let out a groan into your pussy.

“C’mon love, wanna see you come on my face. Taste so fuckin’ sweet for me, y’know that?” Michael practically growled, before resuming his ministrations, obscene noises echoing off the bedroom walls as you twisted and turned under him, legs squeezing his head as you reached your orgasm, wracking your body with pleasure. He was already hard; the sight and taste of you on his tongue was causing his cock to stand at attention, and he hadn’t even touched himself yet. You were a fucking vision spread out on his bed, cheeks rosy and eyes dilated from the pleasure he was giving you. You gasped for air, chest heaving as your vision came back to you, focused on the cocky grin the man currently settled in between your thighs wore. 

“Fuckin’ beautiful,” Michael said smugly, though the adoration in his voice was clear. God, he was going to be the death of you.

“Shut up and kiss me,” you breathed, cheeks even hotter, as he grinned, pressing his body against yours, his still-clothed cock pressed against your messy core. “Why the fuck do you still have pants on?”

“Someone’s eager, aren’t they?” Michael teased, blue eyes locked with yours. “Remembering last night?”

Visions of you over his lap flashed through your head, the soft skin of your behind flushed red as his hand came in contact with it, the way your cunt was practically drooling when he was done, the way he’d made you cum on his cock at least six times before the day was over. The way you felt around him was something primal, something that seemed it could only be sated by the filthiest of actions. You’d never felt this way before, never had someone take their time with you like this. He adored you, he’d said. He adored you.

You couldn’t help but let a small moan slip just at the thought, fueling Michael’s lust for you. You were by far the prettiest thing he’d ever seen, and that was before he’d seen you naked. The fact that you were here, with him, was something he’d never understand. Yet, he wasn’t complaining. He’d pay everything he’d made to see you like this, wanting for him and only him. He complied, quickly undressing until his body was against yours again, your hands gripping at his hair as you kissed him, soft and slow. Your head spun in circles as his tongue lapped at yours, feeling dizzy just at the feeling of his skin on yours. 

“Michael,” you whimpered, as he pressed open-mouthed kisses down your neck, mouth hot against the goosebumps prickling on your skin.

“Don’t worry, love, m’gonna take care of you,” He crooned, sticky-sweet as he lined himself up with you, sinking inside of you slowly to give you time to adjust. You let your eyes flutter shut at the familiar feeling of him filling you up, the head of his cock bumping up against your g-spot, causing you to let out a whine. Michael groaned at the feeling of your wet heat around him, almost sucking him inside of you. The sounds you were making were so obscene, he could have cum right there and then. Still, he held on, watching the way your face contorted in pleasure as he fucked himself in and out of you. Tears pricked at your eyes from overstimulation; yet still, you were the most beautiful thing in the world to him. A vision in his scarred and worn palms; hands that had killed men. Yet, here you were, the most precious thing he’d ever set eyes on, coming to life in those same hands. 

“Please,” you cried, nails scratching at his back as your eyelids fluttered in pleasure, opening slightly so that your eyes could meet his once more, dilated from lust. “Feel so good inside me..” You trailed off, unable to speak as Michael thrust into you at an agonizing pace, sending your eyes rolling back into your head once more. He was practically insatiable, and you loved every second of it, savoring the way he could throw the thoughts right out of your head with just a slight twist of his hips. 

“Want you to come all over my cock, sweetheart,” he encouraged, angelic tone a contrast to the filthy words he was speaking. “Make a mess for me, eh?” You couldn’t help but comply, legs shaking as you reached your fourth orgasm on the night, crying out in pleasure as Michael fucked you through it, his lips pressing kisses to your shoulder, teeth grazing over the soft skin. The way you moaned his name was too much for him, sending him over the edge as he came in you, hot and sticky between your legs. He slumped next to you, breathing heavily, a sheen of sweat glistening on his forehead as he gazed at you, attempting to catch your breath.  

“Not bad, eh?” He smirked, yet you could see the gentleness behind it.

You couldn’t help but smile back at him. “I’d give it a solid eight.”

“Eight?! Looks like we’ve got to go again, then.”

[aoitrinity]

Why Do I Have to Feel Like a Fucking Conspiracy Theorist -- OR -- How I Find a Semblance of Peace on Sunday Night

I’m also going to start this out with a GIANT DISCLAIMER.

I am about to theorize about what may have happened to the SPN finale. I have absolutely no insider knowledge. I am merely speculating here based on the panels and a bunch of Twitter and Tumblr posts that I have been reading over the last few days. If you are not in a good place to read such things, TURN BACK PLEASE. Go take care of yourself and your mental health. You and your feelings are valid and deserve to be handled gently right now.

Additionally, if you are here to give me shit for being unhappy with the ending, please walk away as well. I am here to reach out and share my feelings with people who might be struggling to make sense of something that upset some of us in very deep-seated ways. I am not here to bother you or critique you or tell you that you’re lesser because you liked the ending. If you felt it was good, then go enjoy it.

Long-ass post beneath the cut, everyone.

Alrighty folks...I debated whether or not to do this because I have been spiraling down the hell that is the SPN finale since Thursday. The travesty of what happened to our show--to this beloved show that seemed to have been so perfectly and precisely written for at least four years that it had basically already paved its own tarmac on which to land its plane and we all thought we knew exactly what we were going to get. And then we didn’t. We had a nigh Cas-less and entirely Eileen-less ending. We had no goodbye between Cas and Jack. We had Dean dying young after finally finding his freedom, only to ascend to heaven with no one but Bobby. We had the weird, weird, weird incest-y death scene. We had the bridge crane shot thing because...sure. You do you, Robert Singer.

It was so terrible, so truly awful, and I couldn’t seem to square any of it with anything we had known going in. I tossed and turned and cried and didn’t eat or sleep all weekend. I spent hours just reloading tumblr and twitter, going to the Misha panel, reading and reading and listening and trying to figure out what the fucking hell is going on because I needed to know exactly where to direct my anger. And after a fuckton of talking with @winchester-reload, I think we have at least a very plausible theory about what happened here--I’m laying it out below as much for my own peace of mind as anything else, because otherwise all of these thoughts are going to continue to spin around in my head for weeks and I won’t be able to do jack shit.

Now to start off, unfortunately I do think Dean was slated to die from the beginning of this season. I don’t know WHY they thought that was the best way to go, and I wish they had listened to Jensen on this one. Part of me wonders if it was an order from on high based on the discussion between Becky and Chuck earlier this season--the writers knew it wasn’t a great choice, but they were trying to signal to us that we should feel free to write our own endings to the story because they’d be better (I can wax poetic on the signs of why many of the writers probably wanted Dean to live, but that’s another post). I’m not defending that choice by any means, just laying it out there that I think they didn’t necessarily all want to kill Dean like they did.

However, what I THINK I can explain now is what happened with Misha and why we got so jerked around with Cas’s story. Consider what we know (I can’t immediately source all of it, but I did my best):

At the end of episode 15x19, Lucifer has been returned to the Empty after being killed AGAIN. He talks with Cas. Maybe harasses him a bit about Dean, idk. But then...Jack shows up. New God Jack. And he picks up Cas and pulls him out of the Empty, leaving Lucifer behind, because seriously. Fuck that guy (also leaving behind his abusive father is character growth for Jack, so yay for that).

-Misha was contracted to film 15 episodes this season. He was only in 14.

-Misha told Michael Sheen he had to go back to film 1.5 episodes after the shutdown in March. (Starts at 6:13)

-Misha was in Vancouver during filming of the finale.

-Mark P said at Darklight Con that the last scene he filmed was with Alex and Misha (and Mark P was only in episode 19).

-Misha implied that he was present for various filming moments, including Dean’s death (start at 35:15), and said that it felt like a “mini-reunion.”

-Various sources have mentioned that Jimmy Novak was supposed to be in the finale.

-After episode 18, Stands tweeted a fan who was angered and hurt by Cas's death that they could talk about the “bury the gays” issue after the finale aired.

-In episode 19 we know there were takes of the parking lot scene where the only thing fans observing could hear was Dean yelling “CAS” at Chuck (fuck I can’t find this one right now, but it’s definitely out there)

-Also in episode 19, we had a very strange, awkward montage at the end of the episode.

-In episode 20, we know there were a FUCKTON of missing scenes

-We also had no opening montage, but three other separate montages.

-Carry on My Wayward Son was played TWICE, back-to-back at the end of the episode.

-Episode 20 was shorter than normal and had surprisingly little dialogue. The pacing was VERY strange.

-The cast and crew has been almost completely silent about the finale since it came out. When they have spoken, it has been with an awkward excuse of “Uh...COVID?”

-Samantha Ferris has specifically noted that, despite the Harvelle’s being back in play and a big heaven reunion having been planned pre-COVID, neither she nor Chad Lindberg received any such invitation to return.

-Cas and Dean POP Funko figures were pictured together in a replica of Harvelle’s in 15x04.

NOW with all of this in mind (and I’m probably missing some stuff too because there is so much--feel free to add on to that list), please bear with me because here is what I think we were SUPPOSED to get POST-COVID (after it was determined that the reunion couldn’t happen because of the virus):

In episode 20, we start with our NORMAL OPENING MONTAGE, like always. It traces everything that happened during the season. We are reminded of Cas. The confession. Rowena. Eileen. Jack. Billie, God, the Empty, all of it. 

Things then follow along in the episode where they did up until Dean dies and wakes up in heaven. After his conversation with Bobby, he drives off to find Cas (who, in the script, was listed as “Jimmy Novak” in order to protect against script leaks--who wouldn’t want to do their best to avoid spoilers about the finale with the wrapping of a fifteen-year show?). He does indeed find Cas. We get Dean’s end of the confession. Hell, maybe we even get a kiss. And then Dean sets up his new heaven home in the recreated Harvelle’s. Maybe Cas even fucking moves in. 

Years pass. We get Sam having his life on Earth (still can’t explain why they cut Eileen and couldn’t even have Sam signing vaguely to the blurry brunette in the background; if anyone wants to take that on, go for it). Eventually, Cas tells Dean that it’s almost Sam’s time. Dean takes Baby and goes to meet Sam at the bridge. The cover of Carry on My Wayward Son plays during this much shorter sequence. End of episode.

But that’s not what we got. Instead, much of what I just wrote about was excised from the episode. The remnants were stitched together after shooting had been wrapped. Filler was added in the form of montages and long, unnecessary extra shots to get the episode to something approaching a reasonable length. 

But why? Why would they spend all that time and money and quarantining on Misha, only to almost completely cut him out of the finale? I struggled with why the fuck the CW would want this mammoth show to go down as the greatest queerbait in TV history when they had the chance to do something truly beautiful and monumental with it? It couldn’t just be sheer homophobia, right? Well, I think that factored into it, my friends, but here is where my head is at right now.

It was about cold, hard cash.

Now I could be wrong, but this is what I’m thinking at the moment: Supernatural is going off of the air. Supernatural, the CW’s cash cow for fifteen years. Sure there is still money to be made on blu-rays and merchandise and cons...but they need people watching their shows. They need that sweet advertising revenue. And you know what show they have about to premiere? A show that could, potentially, bring with it a chunk of that SPN revenue?

Walker.

And if any of you know anything about the original Walker Texas Ranger, you know that the show was predominantly a show about a very heterosexual white man being very excessively heterosexual. And for SOME REASON over the years, many of the execs at the CW still seem to think that this show, Supernatural, is really attractive to a lot of middle-American white men...whom they desperately want to watch this new show with this guy from Supernatural that they already know.

Now here’s where COVID fucked us. I think Destiel was greenlit by TPTB, at least in SOME form, before COVID. But then the pandemic happened, and they panicked. They got the cut of the last two episodes and watched them in their original, probably queer form. And then, the execs at CW looked at the economy. They looked at their cash cow, about to make its journey to the great beyond. And they looked at this new little calf Walker that they were so desperately worried about. And they made a choice.

They decided that it would be too risky to take the step with Destiel. They were worried about frightening off their ever-so-valuable hetero male demographic with the possibility that a traditionally masculine man in his 40s could be in love with another man in an overt way. It was homophobia mixed with greed, spun up by fear for their revenues because of COVID.

So they called in Singer, possibly Dabb, although I wouldn’t be surprised if they went straight to Singer. They told them that Destiel had to go: executive orders. And the only way to make it go in a way that removed any trace of what had been there was to rewrite what happened to Cas and cut him out from the last two episodes entirely. It was too late to reshoot anything. They had to just cut and stitch and fill with bullshit montages. 

They removed the scene at the end of 19, probably because Cas and Lucifer discussed Dean. All that was left of Misha there was his voice on that fake phone call. They may have cut other things too, but I would bet my life that they cut a scene from the end of the episode and replaced it with that very strange montage. Then they moved onto 20. They cut out every scene with Cas. And left in only two platonic mentions of him, neither made by Dean. They tried to imply that Cas might show up in Dean’s heaven at some point, but that was as far as the editors could go in the time they had. They filled in with montages, awkwardly long shots, anything they could do to fill all of those missing scenes.

And they even had to take the opening montage, because literally everything in it pointed to Cas being there at the end of it all. They wouldn’t be able to leave out his scenes, they were too critical to the season. They couldn’t cut his confession without raising eyebrows. So they cut the whole thing and moved “Carry On My Wayward Son” to one of the newly-added driving montages at the end. Which is why we awkwardly had both songs play back-to-back--again, such a strange choice unless they were out of options and couldn’t exactly buy rights to a new track or compose anything else.

And so we were left with the shadow of the finale that we deserved, that Cas and Dean deserved. We were left without resolution or happiness or words. Bobo told us the most important thing about happiness is just “saying it” and our characters were silenced without anyone ever knowing the truth.

I think the writers might have known and been given the new party line that “Misha never filmed, he couldn’t, sorry, it was COVID, no one’s fault!” But I don’t think most of the cast even knew it had happened until they watched the finale on Thursday with us (though they might have been confused why the bit from 15x19 was sliced, they could reasonably have assumed it was a time thing and also BL episodes don’t make sense anyway). Why do I say that?

Well, first of all, Misha started sending out a bunch of excited texts to fans with some old BTS pictures about an hour before the show started airing on EST. He also wanted his children to see the episode, his YOUNG children. Why would he show them such a traumatic episode if their Dad wasn’t in it? What if it was because he wanted them to witness what was going to be a monumental moment in queer television history that their DAD got to be a part of? And then that was all dashed.

Which is why I think the cast and crew went almost completely radio silent the next day. I don’t think they knew. And based on how they have been acting on social media since then, I think many of them are absolutely furious, but they have been silenced because of NDAs, because they want to find work again in a cutthroat industry, because they don’t want to bring down the hellfire of Warner Brothers Entertainment upon themselves. So the most we have gotten is a little acknowledgement from the MERCHANDISING COMPANY trying to validate our pain (god bless Shirts, she is a LIFESAVER) and a response to my salty tweet about keeping good stuff in the closet from Adam Williams (the VFX coordinator) that seemed to acknowledge the validity of my complaint.

Then there was a scramble behind the scenes, I would bet my life. Talking points were fed to the boys who had panels today, to CE, to all the cast and crew:

Toe the party line. Misha never filmed. This was always about COVID. Do not mention Destiel. Do not mention Dean’s feelings for Cas. Do not promote the Castiel Project or anything that validates the idea that this was anything less than a superb ending.

And that is why we have heard so little from the cast on this front, and what we have heard has been muddled and contradictory. That is why the writers are saying nothing. That is why we have been left adrift.

Now before I close this out, I do want to say that I really, genuinely do not think this was on the writers at all. I feel like they tried to give us the best ending that they could, in a writers room that we know is notorious for splitting along party lines about the overall story (BL and Singer, who have always been about the brothers and their man-pain vs. Dabb and the rest who always seemed to want more for them and for Cas). I think they did everything in their power to at least end with Dean and Cas happy together. If they could give us nothing else, they wanted to give us that. And then the network took it from them. From us. From everyone.

For the sake of fucking money. 

And the WORST PART OF IT ALL, for me, is that in the wake of this disaster, the fans have been left to try and figure out what happened. We have had to wade through a mire of conflicting information in the midst of all of our collective anger and grief over this garbage ending of a show many of us have loved and even relied on for YEARS, all the while wondering if we’re just fucking crazy, if we have all fallen collectively into the hole of conspiracy theories. That hurts ESPECIALLY badly because we have taken so many hits over the years from other groups on social media saying we were crazy for seeing things that weren’t there (especially Destiel), for writing meta and analyzing tropes and believing the evidence of our eyes and ears. The network has made us relive that entire nightmare WHILE processing our grief for a show we wanted so badly to celebrate and which instead we now have to mourn.

So again guys, I cannot prove that this is exactly what happened at all; this is simply my idea of what may have happened. But right now, it’s the most sense I can make from this mess, and to be honest, the act of typing it out has helped me enormously in my processing of it all. I feel like I can see more clearly, like I know where to target my outrage and where to direct empathy. I feel like just fucking maybe, I might be able to do my job tomorrow without bursting into tears at random moments. 

I really hope that this post has helped some of you to, in some small way, process this too. We get through this the way that Misha told us at his panel this morning, the way the writers have told us to do all season long...we throw out the story God gave us and we make it better. We write our characters the happy endings they deserve. 

We save them.

One last thing--if you have not already, please consider channeling your rage into a donation to one of the five causes our fandom has put together to pay tribute to our beloved show and to mourn the ending it should have had:

-The Castiel Project

-Dean Winchester is Love

-Sam Winchester Project

-The National Association of the Deaf

-The Jack Kline Project