#Why are they so weird

[janesurlife]

So now the whole family is leeching off of Carlos....just great

[koa-z]

i realized that they were facing opposite directions, thought of this, and it made me giggle

[sleepysheadache]

They're matching eachothers freak (they actually don't know what to do, all they can do is just.. stare. Weirdos.)

[onejellyfishplease]

Oooh I wonder why April’s looking for that?

Anyway, just another little au to add to my collection. Imma call this one: Switch and Twist

(Next)

[hawkswildfireheart]

Things to add to my list of pet peeves:

- my sister's bf (not the one that lives with us) *always* walking through the whole house with his still wet and muddy shoes from the driveway (yay for sloppy clay dirt driveways)

- that he's been told multiple times not to do so, after he got mud all over mom's brand new lighter colored rug in the living room

- kid still does it every time he's over, even after my sister yelled at him cause she had to clean up the mud

- all that's changed is he just get super sheepish when he walks past to her room to go take his shoes off. Like kiddo, just take em off by the backdoor. You can leave them back there with the rest of the shoes, no one is going to take them. Or just carry them to her room ffs

[troblsomtwins829]

I'm sorry, I need to talk for a second about how much words baffle me.

Hi. I hate homophones. Words that sound the same, but are spelled differently and have different applications. There Their They're, To Too Two, You Ewe Yew, Fore For Four. Drives me up the wall.

You know what I hate more? Words that apply to perfectly normal things that my brain has decided to read completely differently than intended just to confuse me even more!

Carpet - Car-Pet. Am I petting the Car? is the Car a pet?! What's the purpose of the PET part of it's a CAR?! WHY ARE THEY TOGETHER?!

Thermometer - Thermo-Meter. A measure of temperature by distance?! HOW DOES THAT MAKE SENSE?! Is it Imperial or Metric!?

Together - To-Get-Her. SHE'S SO DESIRABLE TO THE BOTH OF US. BUT WHY MUST WE FIGHT FOR HER AFFECTIONS?! WHY CAN WE NOT SHARE?!

[mauvemars]

why did i dream about the same guy TWICE in a row

[mistyycowoa]

Chinese Folklore: red everywhere and fireworks on new year's eve or die to some weirdass dragon monster thing

I love folklore so much because depending on the location and era it comes from it's either the most terrifying concept or the dumbest thing you've ever heard

[batcavescolony]

Katniss is such an unreliable narrator. She says "Then something unexpected happens. At least, I don't expect it because I don't think of District 12 as a place that cares about me" girl you deliver strawberries to the Mayor, you hunt and trade for the district, when you fell at Prim being chosen someone caught you, when you went to Prim people parted for you, when you volunteered EVERYONE stopped. Idk how to tell you but I think you're a pillar of the community.

[atalana]

the curse of adhd:

i will remember with absolute clarity, when the thought strikes me that i have a text to send someone, that this is the fourth time in three days i've attempted to send this specific text

i will forget, in the time it takes me to pick up my phone, that i picked it up intending to send a text

[warden-draws-sometimes]

Welcome to "block blast, I don't remember these being on your block list" episode 173952+93882!_

A good amount of these were taken in literally the same day-

[gibbearish]

love when ppl defend the aggressive monetization of the internet with "what, do you just expect it to be free and them not make a profit???" like. yeah that would be really nice actually i would love that:)! thanks for asking

[stemmmm]

one more one more

same au thing as last time

[silosbears]

i think alphonse would still experience depersonalization and dysmorphia even after getting his body back

[shanklin]

Sentient Mystery Shack, who is really biased towards Stan, so when Ford tells Stan he has to give it back after the summer it’s on sight.

Ford keeps tripping over nothing, nothing is where it's supposed to be and somehow he keeps running into closets when he tries to go outside.

But the worst part, the WORST part is that Ford's lightbulb just won't. Work. No matter what he does it keeps flickering and exploding.

Ford is spiraling. 

There is no reason why it shoudln’t work. All his trial runs work perfectly. He’s already checked the Shacks wiring three times and relearned this dimensions science from the ground up. 

Nothing works.

The Rift? Bill? The impending apocalypse? Eating? Sleep? Who cares about that. 

WHY. WONT. THE. LIGHTBULB. WORK???

It doesn’t help that Stan keeps laughing at him.

“Then you do it!” Ford eventually snaps at Stan.

Stan shrugs and with a little song under his breath screws his own lightbulb in. It works perfectly.

Stanford screams.

[morganbritton132]

AU where Steve hears that his girlfriend is cheating on him with the town freak but never suspects it’s with his good friend Jonathan.

So now, Eddie had a sad jock at his door threatening to beat him up but like, through tears. A lot of tears. He’s crying pretty hard and it’s getting really awkward.