#Where to buy one up mushroom chocolate b

[william-scott77]

Trippy Treats Magic shrooms chocolate bars

Trippy Treats Magic shrooms chocolate bars the highest quality Psilocybin chocolate bar on the market made by extracting the psilocybin from the mushrooms. Allows for a much pure High eliminating the upset stomach feeling users would get from digesting mushrooms.

[imadeletingmysocials]

Things cheaper at Dollartree (after much research)

This is a big list I made for myself and anyone else who wants to know what is legit cheaper at the dollar tree and not just 1 dollar for the sake of there, some things might surprise you what is cheaper and even better at a dollar tree. I try to also pick the healthiest options and compare them to prices in places such as Walmart or a large stock place like BJs. I have also used fooducate.com to see which ones are more healthy, of course with things such as chips and snacks though don’t consider them to be healthy but in those cases I opt for the off-brand ones that taste better than the brand ones. Note: This is USA based.

Food:

Drinks:

Azul Coconut Juice, 16.5 oz. (cheapest and healthiest coconut water out there)

Gatorade Fruit Punch Thirst Quencher, 24 oz.

Stacker 2 B-12 Vitamin Shots is also cheaper.

Rockstar Pure Zero Silver Ice Energy Drinks (energy drinks are bad for you but it’s like 30 cents cheaper here than in walmart)

LaCroix Lime Flavored Sparkling Water 1 litter

(don’t even bother with any or all of the cheap soda it’s the worst, please drink water if anything else, all of the good soda is cheaper somewhere else also)

Snacks:

Cheez-It Original Baked Snack Crackers, 4.5 oz is cheaper at Dollartree.

Nabisco Cheese Nips Baked Snack Crackers, 7 oz is cheaper at Dollartree.

Nabisco Ritz Bits Cheese and Cracker Sandwiches, 3-oz. is SORTA cheaper at dollartree.

Island Choice Dry-Roasted Peanuts, 7.5 oz. (shelled nuts cheaper everywhere else of course in bulk)

Island Choice Honey-Roasted Dry-Roasted Peanuts, 7.5 oz

Pennysticks Mini Pretzels, 12 oz (pretzels the same, these cheaper)

Tropical Chips Plantains, 3-oz (30 cents cheaper)

Barcel Takis Fuego Flavored Churritos Stix, 4 oz (apparently, 9oz is 2,50 so 3 would be 12oz and 3 dollars, it would be kinda cheaper?)

Pringles Grab & Go Barbecue Chips, 2.5 oz (buying in bulk anywhere else is cheaper though, however, this single container costs 1,25 everywhere else)

Brim's Fried Barbecue Pork Rinds, 2.635 oz

Carolina Country Snacks Salt & Vinegar Pork Rinds. 2.75 oz

Sheila G's Chocolate Chip Brownie Brittle, 2 oz

Barcel Takis Crunchy Fajitas Tortilla Chips, 3.2 oz

T.G.I. Friday’s Jalapeno Cheddar Potato Skins Snack Chips, 4.5 oz

Snack Factory Original Pretzel Crisps, 3-oz (50 cents cheaper!)

PopCorners Kettle Flavor Popped Corn Chips, 3 oz. (better in bulk also)

Good Health Veggie Chips with Sea Salt, 2.75-oz (better in bulk also)

Stacy's Parmesan Garlic & Herb Flavored Pita Chips, 3 oz (better in bulk also)

Rudolph's OnYums Onion-Flavored Ring Chips, 3 oz (it’s off brand Funyuns but it’s actually BETTER and cheaper depending on where you buy them because they’re often sold more expensively at gas stations than Funyuns, fun fact)

Island Choice Banana Chips, 6 oz. Bags

Island Choice Sweet and Spicy Trail Mix, 5 oz (healthy!)

Breakfast Blueberry Biscuits, 7.93 oz.

Harvest Hill Quick Oats, 16 oz. Canisters (Top choice too)

Canned and Pickled

Pampa Tropical Mango Slices in Light Syrup, 15 oz. Cans

Bell's Pitted Olives, 6 oz

Green Giant Sliced Carrots, 14.5 oz (but mostly because I cannot find them anywhere else, all other Green Giant stuff is sold cheaper in bulk though)

Margaret Holmes Finely Chopped Spinach, 27 oz (TOP CHOICE)

Crider Premium Chunk White Turkey 5oz

Libby"s Sliced Pineapple, 20 oz (surprisingly!)

Margaret Holmes Seasoned Field Peas and Snaps, 15 oz

Cans of Pampa(R) Peach Slices, 15.25oz

Pampa Mushroom Pieces & Stems, 10 oz

Pampa Extra-Long Asparagus Spears, 12-oz (by the way Pampa is a really good healthy brand which is cheaper so these alternatives are great)

Libby's Premium Mandarin Oranges, 15 oz

Breckenridge Farms Pickled Jalapeno Slices, 12.5 oz (however Old El Paso Jalapeno Slices, Pickled 12.5oz is 1 dollar more expensive in other places and considered more healthy)

Van Camp's Chunk White Albacore Tuna 5oz (keep in mind this is the only canned tuna that is cheaper at dollartree, Albacore is very healthy and usually more expensive than Tuna, but dollartree sells white albacore in water on the same price as light tuna, this is a very good tuna brand as well)

Mc. Trader Tender Green Asparagus Spears, 10.5 oz

Pampa Smoked Oysters in Oil

Healthy Choice Chicken Noodle Soup, 15-oz

Beach Cliff Sardines in Mustard Sauce, 3.75 (top choice)

Beach Cliff Sardines in Water, 3.75 oz (top choice)

French Onion Dip, 8.5 oz (all onion’s dips the same as well)

Condiments and Spicing

Goya Sazon Seasoning, 8-Packet Boxes

Deli Market Yellow Mustard 20oz (not only is this the best healthiest mustard, but it’s cheaper if you buy it like this than any other mustard in stock size, I wish I had known of this before already stocking up buy buying a 2 pack of 20oz mustard at BJs which is enough to last a year for me)

Louisiana Supreme Hot Sauce 12oz (top choice too)

Kendale Farm Beef Broth, 32 oz (top choice, cheaper than most 32oz broths)

Heinz 57 Sauce, 5 oz. (1,50 cheaper than Walmart)

Hunts Tomato Ketchup, 20 oz (all ketchup is the same)

Deli Market Deli Spicy Brown Mustard (top choice)

Riverton Orchards Lemon Juice, 32-oz (lemon juice the same)

Kraft Bullseye Everyday Original Barbecue Sauce, 17.5-oz (80 cents cheaper than the same product in Target)

A.1. Thick & Hearty Steak Sauce, 5 oz. (SURPRISINGLY, not even in bulk is it as cheap as this? Weird, 5oz is 1 dollar right? 30oz for A1 is usually 8 dollars in stock supermarkets, but 5 times 8 would be 40oz! This is... Interesting. Especially considering it’s a well known brand as well, I wonder who is their dealer or are they just selling it cheap out of donation?)

Healthy Chef Canola Non-Stick Cooking Spray (this one’s pretty wild too, it only is sold at dollartree and is considered the healthiest cooking spray in the entirety of America according to fooducate)

Candy

Gonna go on a safe bet here and say that everything can be found for less and in greater quantity anywhere else. Hairbo Twin Snake is the same price at Walmart though. Most candies are sold 40% cheaper at bulk supermarkets though.

Office & School Supplies

You can probably find all of these at an Ebay auction, but it’s more accessible here.

Crayola Washable Glue Sticks, 2-ct. Packs (1.50 cheaper than walmart)

Duck Tape is cheap as hell

All-Purpose Krazy Glue, .052-oz. Tubes

Other stuff:

Laundry stuff, I’d recommend Ajax 40oz or Fab. Those are AMAZING brands and known as top quality in Australia. And it is insane how cheap this is, they must import it??

Scott Toilet Paper: Oh my god HOW IS 4 TOILET PAPERS THIS CHEAP HERE AT THE DOLLAR TREE???? TP is literally more expensive everywhere else.

Kitchen appliances, a glass salt shaker is like 5 dollars at Walmart but it’s 1 dollar at dollartree. All of the Betty Crocker kitchen appliances like spatulas are only a dollar too and so good. (They are 3 DOLLARS cheaper at dollar tree). IT IS INSANE HOW CHEAP this shit is here, like the can opener they sell for 1 dollar is 6 or 5 dollars everywhere else.

Fisher-Price Smart Care Aloe Vera and Chamomile Baby Wipes, 80-ct. Packs

All Arm & Hammer stuff including the Arm & Hammer Ultra Max 3-in-1 Fresh Scented Body Wash, Shampoo, and Conditioner, 12 oz are good choices. Deodorant too is good. All Arm and hammer stuff here is cheaper than on Walmart and a great brand.

Hand soap might be found for 97 cents at Walmart but it’s a small difference.

Not Cheaper, Best bought at a bulk store:

Peanut Butter Filled Pretzels

snack bars.

V8 Vegetable Juice

Potato Stix

Cereal

Canned Soup

Canned Tuna

Badia Original Complete Seasoning (this took a while to calculate but yes it’s cheaper to buy in bulk, dollartree has 2,5oz for 1 dollar, usually a 2 pack of 12oz each is 13 dollars. if you do like 2.5 times 2.5oz, it’s like 32oz which is more than 24oz for 13 dollars, but you can find 1.75 lbs. of this for 8 dollars)

Iodized Salt (get it at Great value honestly)

Dill Pickles in general, but Vlasic Kosher Dill Pickles is the healthiest choice

Cambell canned soups

Goya canned beans

Sunny Sea Sardines in Tomato Sauce, 7.5-oz

Here’s hoping me publishing this doesn’t crash the market or anything but seriously, you can live healthily and frugally like this. I literally survive like this easily, I just spend like 60 dollars a month max with supplies.

[koteosa]

here’s some modern au headcanons for the arcana ... it’s something I think about a lot

Asra

gamer memeing shitlord . he majored in minecraft you cannot convince me otherwise

plays A Lot of minecraft but also just enjoys any similar sort of game, sdv, animal crossing, etc. He’s really good at video games but he’s just fucking around . he likes to play online games and try his best to make everyone hate him in a really harmless sort of way . he heals the enemy spy . changes his display name and avatar to be exactly the same as someone else . tells people to go into the console and type unbindall

he plays games with his friends and he’s usually the top player so he just spends his time spoiling the shit out of his friends giving them good items carrying them through dungeons etc but not Julian, he tells Julian to dig straight down in minecraft . Julian doesn’t ever know what he’s doing in any video game so Asra trains him wrong on purpose, as a joke

anyway enough about video games (for now)

Asra lives in a van that he painted the exterior of himself, it was both a fun project and a very smug way to annoy people with this awful fucking hippie van strolling into town, eat shit

it’s decorated with crystals, furs, fairy lights, mason jars full of food For The Aesthetic, books, etc. It’s very cozy, cottagecore / bohemian and it’s ridiculously obvious that he’s into witchcraft. he just lets Faust explore because this isn’t real and I can pretend that a snake is exactly as well behaved as in a fantasy story

basically homeless by choice

drugs tw but I see him as the type to want to try anything and everything at least once so if he’s ever been offered A Drug (and he crashes parties for fun and for free food, so he’s got opportunities) he’ll try it Just To See, and this has resulted in some bad trips before, but Muriel saw him in the middle of one and then after he sobered up Muriel put his foot down and made Asra agree to only do these things as responsibly as possible, like, with supervision from a friend

still drugs tw but I also see Asra as a stoner but in the cbd edibles sort of way, a lot of this is because I headcanon Asra as having ADD (because I do and I want to project a little bit) so it helps him focus but also he just Likes It. the glove box of his car has like, chocolate/lollipop edibles stuff like that

goes between like super healthy elaborate meals with mushrooms and veggies and fresh meat and shit and then just eating nothing but cheez-its all day

style wise I see him as the type to wear a lot of tank tops, like, the loosest of tank tops so it hangs super low and long and you get some nice cleavage out of it, crystal necklaces, gold jewelry, pride pins/jewelry/etc (trans/nonbinary/bisexual flags), oversized hoodies with loud colorful patterns, joggers and other loose comfy pants, and either boots or slippers

he’s got like... the at home look that’s basically what I just described, and then the away from home look that’s got thirty layers and none of it makes sense and he just shows up in orange crocs With Patterned Socks and everyone who sees him just lets out the heaviest sigh

Asra getting home be like (takes off a layer of clothes) (takes off a layer of clothes) (takes off a layer of clothes) (takes off a layer of clothes) (takes off a l

He likes to go on long road trips completely at random and saves up money to go on more extensive trips like, out of the continent. It can be really hard to place him at any given time, especially because he’s extremely slow to respond to texts for a whole multitude of reasons. He just fucking vanishes sometimes and he doesn’t get that maybe people want to know where he is. He’s too solitary

He makes money either via street performances (magic, tarot readings, etc) or selling shit on etsy like handmade tarot decks, crystal necklaces, magic charms, etc. He Has Never Worked A Day In His Life and He Will Not Start Now

Responsibility? Don’t know her

People ask him really obnoxious questions sometimes and he makes outlandish lies to tell them for fun . Why do you live in a van? A house killed my parents

In the fall/winter he lives with Muriel or more to the point, he crashes on his couch for a really long time and Muriel’s landlord doesn’t need to know about it for rent purposes

Julian

he’s a highly paid doctor and your mother would love it if you’d marry him if not for the fact that he looks like he never left his teenage emo phase

PIERCINGS

There’s DEFINITELY at least one piercing on his d

he lives with Portia and Mazelinka and tries to handle all their expenses but Mazelinka won’t fucking let him

soundproofed his room but not because he’s a youtuber or anything but because he uh. y’know what I’m gonna let y’all figure this one out on your own

goes to like............. lgbt friendly bdsm clubs every now and then looking for someone to step on him and call him garbage it’s for his mental health you don’t understand

black turtlenecks . silver jewelry . distinguished but Edgy as well, black boots, winklepickers, doc martens, ohmygod this is my SHIT I’m giving him red plaid pants and a reversed cross necklace and a leather jacket that says some radical shit on the back and Lots of Rings . black jeans with tears in the knees and black eyeshadow, demonia boots, leather gloves, hhhhhhOHmy GOD

catch him at home in black leggings and a my chemical romance tshirt with holes in it . he wakes up in the morning with yesterday’s makeup and he just cleans it up a little and that’s good enough

fairly small bedroom because he’s usually never at home, but it’s still pretty clear what he’s into even if it’s not super decorated or elaborate, kind of just Default Room but with his stuff arranged throughout . band posters, black furniture, a bed that looks like a depressed vampire sleeps in it, a bookshelf but most of the books are scattered around his desk, bed, and the floor. there’s a taxidermy skull on display somewhere because it’s just so dramatic you gotta love it

plays a black electric violin

extremely out of tune with pop culture he still listens to 70-00s music and he doesn’t know what a minecraft is or why Asra keeps yelling CREEPER when he comes into the room nor why Portia yells back AW MAN

I googled it and he qualifies as a millennial but I still see him as such a fucking old man who doesn’t know how to use electronics

despite being a doctor he’s so unhealthy . he eats nothing but depression meals (or just, nothing) unless someone forces him to sit down and eat an actual meal . No Julian whiskey does not count for your daily water intake

Malak probably happened because Julian wouldn’t stop feeding every black bird he saw just for the aesthetic and that was like 17 years ago but they still show up at his window expecting almonds or whatever the fuck . he changes houses but they’re too smart . you try to be a cool gothic thespian with a raven that will pose on your arm ONE time when you’re a teenager and they just never stop coming

sad lonely no friends hasn’t been laid in six years because he’s too busy and no longer remembers how to form meaningful relationships. Portia keeps being like so I met this really hot (insert gender here) and like idk I think they’re into goth dudes............... just saying...................... and he’s like am I really so pathetic that I’m going to let my baby sister set up blind dates for me? Yes

would drive something very goth like a hearse or some shit if not for the fact that his family would make sure he ends up in a coffin in the back of it if he drove up in that shit . please . buy a normal fucking car . Julian . oh my god

he starts quoting melodramatic poetry at the slightest inconvenience . he is that “All you did was betray me as I lay sick and festering. You are the definition of dread. My cat stole my fucking garlic bread” meme

been arrested multiple times for general rowdiness but also for political activism . at this point Portia/Mazelinka will just sigh and pay his bail and they don’t even ask what he did this time . how does he still have a job? I wish I knew

theater kid

Muriel

lives in a rundown apartment in the shitty part of town because it’s all he can afford, it’s quiet, and no one will try to visit him (except Asra) because no one wants to go to THAT part of town . but no harm will likely ever befall him because he’s 6′10 and like three million pounds of raw muscle with battle scars like you gonna fuck with that? really?

even if he got robbed it wouldn’t matter because A) he doesn’t own anything B) Inanna will chase the thief away

depression man staying in his quiet rundown dark apartment distracting himself with idle hobbies and taking care of his dog to prevent the encroaching ennui from tearing him a new asshole

changes jobs frequently both because he never stands out therefore never gets taken on full time after the part time trial period, AND to protect himself from the horror of being known

works mostly things like construction, auto repair, dog sitting/walking/etc, woodworking, mostly hard labor but if he can convince granny to let a very scary but completely harmless man look after her bichon frise for the weekend then he’s pretty happy about that

in a similar manner, he orders everything online so cashiers/etc won’t start to recognize him. delivery workers leave everything outside his door and he just drags it inside after they leave like an itazura kitty coin bank

goes camping a lot because staying cooped up in his apartment is super bad for his mental health and he doesn’t like to take walks through the city for a multitude of reasons. he takes Inanna on walks through the woods instead

Asra is his only friend and that’s fine (it’s not fine)

convinced therapy doesn’t work and he wants nothing to do with it

doesn’t like using electronics and only keeps a few things around his house so Asra can use them when he’s around . Muriel has a phone (that Asra got for him) so he can text Asra, check the time, check the weather, google questions, and like, nothing else

pretty much only happy when something is about dogs. he wants to go to the pet store and look at the dogs but he needs Asra to go with him so Asra can distract the workers and Muriel can look at the puppies in peace

dresses in blacks, grays, greens, and browns for the most part, jacket with the hood up, tank tops, dark jeans with tears in them, brown boots with mud stains on them . functional, not particularly stylish, and if he’s going to be in public he doesn’t want to make it easy for anyone to see his face. at home it’s mostly no shirt + sweatpants/joggers/etc. doesn’t accessorize or put in any real effort. he doesn’t care what he looks like (because he’s convinced he’s not much to look at anyway)

lives that super eco friendly life like Asra does but it’s more that he just feels comfortable living like he’s always on a camping trip

he doesn’t want to eat junk like Asra does but if Asra shows up with mcdonalds then well he can’t really say no

the type who uses something until he absolutely cannot use it anymore instead of just buying a new one

has never been to a doctor, dentist, etc Ever. the most he can do is take Inanna to the vet because he loves her so much

drives a very old pickup truck with like, chipped paint and mud stains. he’d take better care of it if only anything in life mattered

didn’t go to school

Portia

I like to think that she took on a groundskeeping job at Nadia’s very expensive large house and they fell in love and now Nadia pays for everything and Portia just spends her time gardening, playing with Pepi, and like idk running a vlogging/gaming youtube channel

200 videos of Pepi on her youtube channel with 4 million views each bare minimum . takes random videos of cats where she has to audio edit it to shit so you can’t hear her high pitched squeals of delight

minecraft let’s play part 30 where her, Asra, Nadia, and Julian play together and it’s extremely chaotic because Asra and Portia decide to gang up on Julian who does NOT know what he’s doing, and then Nadia surprises them all by not being the bigger person and instead tricking Julian into some elaborate trap where he steps on a trapdoor and falls 15 blocks into some lava and he looks up and all he sees is Nadia’s smug fucking avatar looking down at him

nightcore. it’s just not FAST enough

wears sweaters with cats on them. generally dresses in warm colors + brown/green, it’s like a very soft cozy look that you could go camping in or just generally be outside and get grass stains and whatnot. cute, functional

likes to make Julian do things for her like drive her places etc because like, he will. he always will

really likes social gatherings with her friends; sleepovers, beach trips, sitting at mcdonalds and pouring all their fries into a pile etc. tries to get Julian to go with her but he’s Just So BUSY. she makes fun of him and makes him drive her to it, then manages to convince him to stay

cottagecore aesthetic . she just thinks it’s so cute to have the little mason jars and decorate everything with leaves and flowers and BEES and whatnot . would love to live in a little cottage with a farm if she could

her room has a big cat tree in it . green wallpaper with yellow flowers. pressed flowers into books, an extremely cozy bed, fairy lights, it’s very farmy but also there’s a lot of electronics. she’s got a lot of 00s games, like, right in that ps2 sweet spot

nicknames all of her pokemon

she spoils the ever loving shit out of Pepi. She’s got a little cat harness and they go on walks through the park together

I don’t have a lot to say about the other two I Am Sorry

[saturnwritings]

funfetti

—kenma, kuroo, bokuto and akaashi go cake shopping for y/n’s birthday, chaos ensues. 

pairing(s): offscreen kenma x reader (with a light dusting of bokuaka because i am legally obliged to)

word count: 1307

a/n: i’m so sorry this is so stupid omg but i wanted to post this cause it was from an activity in english where we practiced dialogue obviously reflecting characters' personalities. this was originally with voltron characters but i decided to change it B)

“Stop goofing around! Don’t you remember, Kenma brought us here to buy a cake for y/n’s birthday!” Akaashi yelled at Bokuto, who was trying on party hats made for 5 year olds. No matter how many times he reprimanded Bokuto and Kuroo for getting side-tracked, they never seemed to listen - and Akaashi was starting to lose his patience. 

“Kenma! Kenma! Look at this cake topper - it’s a pigeon! Didn’t you name a pokemon that looked like this after y/n? I think we should get this for her!” Kuroo all but yelled. To anyone else in the store he would have been mistaken for an overly excited child. 

Kenma almost rolled his eyes, but when he saw what Kuroo was gesturing at, his eyes lit up ever so slightly, however Kuroo, ever so knowledgeable in the subject of Kenma, noticed it right away. 

In his head, Kenma was feeling soft. He was surprised Kuroo remembered but then again, y/n was mad at him for a whole week for naming a Pigeon after her of all Pokemon. He almost smiled at the memory when Bokuto cut off his train of thought.

“We should totally get it! Oh, and-” Bokuto got cut off by Akaashi.

“Guys, we need to focus! We’re never going to get anything done if you keep getting distracted. We need to pick out a cake for y/n! I swear, it’s like I have two children to babysit!” Akaashi scolded. Bokuto and Kuroo exchanged looks. Kuroo pouted and turned away to avoid getting punished, Bokuto’s hair tufts deflated ever so slightly.

“Sorry, Akaashi.” Bokuto slung his arm around Akaashi’s shoulders, “We didn’t mean to cause you so much trouble…” He said as he leaned his head on Akaashi’s. Bokuto glanced sideways with puppy dog-like eyes, Akaashi simply let out a sigh (they all knew he wasn’t really that mad).

Kenma looked away from the exchange to see Kuroo rearranging some wooden letters on the shelf they were on. So far, Kenma could see he had H-E-N-T-A. Further in the distance, he saw a 2-for-1 sale for black forest cakes. 

“Let’s just get the chocolate cake, they’re on sale and everyone likes chocolate, I guess.” Kenma explained while pointing at the sale sign. Bokuto gasped and pulled away from Akaashi, only to grab his hands and clutch them tightly. 

“Can we? It’s in our budget isn’t it?” Bokuto’s eyes sparkled. Akaashi was slightly shocked Bokuto was able to remember the budget of ¥2,500, the chocolate cake sale falling just short. He thought for a second, but ultimately shook his head. 

“It’s not healthy for us to get two cakes… And remember your birthday last year? We could barely finish that one fruitcake.” Akaashi recounted. 

“Fine, whatever…” Bokuto pouted and let his eyes wander around the store until his eyes landed on another cake. “How about this one then!” Bokuto walked over to an angel's food cake that looked about 40 centimeters in diameter. “The angel on the top kinda looks like you though, Akaashi!” He said with a dopey smile, Akaashi’s cheeks flushed and his eyes slightly widened. Before he could say anything, though, Bokuto continued, “And it’s almost the size of Kenma!” An exaggeration, of course. 

“Oh, come on! We all know Kenma’s the size of a mushroom! That’s not saying a lot.” Kuroo expressed, finally directing his attention to the conversation and away from his wooden letters. Kenma huffed. 

“Say goodbye to your kneecaps, asshole.” Kenma declared, getting ready to square up. 

“I’m sorry Bokuto, it’s way out of our budget.” Akaashi said softly, keeping in mind the set price they had decided on beforehand. Secretly, he wanted to get the angel’s food cake purely because of Bokuto’s earlier comment.

“Fine!” Bokuto whined, admitting defeat. “Hm… Kenma! What’s another kind of cake that y/n would like?” Bokuto asked, hoping Kenma would know.

“How about this mixed-berry cheesecake?” Akaashi asked, browsing the cakes in coolers.

“Why don’t we just get a blueberry one? It is the superior fruit after all.” Kenma said, dead serious. 

“But where’s the fun in that?! Why have just one berry when you can have multiple!” Bokuto exclaimed. They all understood this; they know Bokuto’s the type of person who likes to go all out. 

“Let’s just get that one, then. I mean, it's in our budget.” Akaashi shrugged. Kenma huffed.

“Aw, Kenma! If you want, I can pick off the strawberries and raspberries for you?” Kuroo taunted. 

“Whatever, Kuro! It doesn’t matter, I’m not that picky. And, it’s not even my cake! This is all for y/n!” Kenma countered. Kuroo’s face morphed into a disheartened expression, not liking that his best friend was paying so much attention to someone else and not him. He was just clingy that way. 

Kenma turned to Akaashi. “Let's get that cake then, how much is it?” He asked, looking like a child who got his video game privileges taken away. Akaashi frowned.

“Kenma, if you don’t want it, it’s fine. y/n is gonna be happy with any cake you choose, I’m sure of it.” Akaashi said, sounding like a supportive mom, Bokuto and Kuroo seemingly vanished. Kenma glanced around the store, he spotted a colorful cake with a calico cat cake topper not too far from him.

“What about this one?” He asked as he walked towards it. Secretly, Kenma really liked cats. Akaashi, upon further inspection, found it to be a funfetti cake with dollops of frosting on top surrounding a cat cake topper. He looked at the price.

“It’s ¥2,160. We can get it if you want?” Kenma’s eyes lit up for the second time that day. He nodded mutley and picked up the box of the cake. 

As he and Akaashi headed towards the register, they heard a scream followed by a large crash coming from a few aisles down. Their widened eyes exchanged a look and they both knew what the other was thinking: Bokuto and Kuroo.

They both started speed-walking to the aisle they heard the crash and lo-and-behold, Kuroo and Bokuto, as well as an alarming amount of the surrounding area, were covered in frosting and cake crumbs. 

Kenma and Akaashi stood frozen as an employee came running. The employee’s eyes bulged and when things were about to get even messier, another, older looking employee also came running and sighed. The first employee was just about to start yelling when the second cut him off.

“I’m sorry, I’m going to have to ask you to leave.” He said solemnly. Kenma felt sorry for the man, he looked so done. Akaashi stepped forward, bowed and started apologizing on behalf of his friends. When he was done, Kenma finally built up the nerve to speak.

“Uhm, is it okay if we still buy this?” He held up the cake box and the man sighed.

“I suppose, but please have your friends wait outside.” Kenma saw Akaashi look pointedly at Bokuto and Kuroo, and they got the message and left the store to wait right outside of the entrance. 

Kenma and Akaashi paid for the cake (Akaashi offered to pay but Kenma reasoned that it was, after all, y/n’s birthday, so it would be most fitting if he paid, but Akaashi pays for the damages, though) and they met up with the Bokuto and Kuroo, still covered in cake, outside. Bokuto looked inside the cake box.

“Aw hell yeah! You chose right bro! Everyone knows funfetti is more epic fun!” He was practically vibrating with excitement. 

bonus: you hear a knock at your door. kenma walks in holding a box, followed by akaashi and a cake covered kuroo and bokuto. you decide not to ask. you all spend the day hanging out, eating funfetti cake, playing video games and performing general clownery. the end.

[guiltypleasurefandomface]

The British Sweets

I keep seeing the word “Candy” being said in fic by british characters, and then I keep seeing sweets we don’t have here in the UK being eaten by british characters, plus Candy to mean including chocolate. So I’m gonna just throw some sweets out there as good alternatives as a go to equivalent for if you’re in desperate need of your character having a sugar fix.

First off. It’s never candy, and sweets don’t usually include chocolate bars. If and when they do, it’s usually the bars are the fun size bars or the teeny tiny lucky bag type included in with other types of sweets. If you’ve gone to the shops and you buy a snickers and a mars bar and fry’s chocolate cream, you’ve bought chocolate bars, not sweets.

And also we call Cotton Candy “Candy Floss”. You can get three bags for £1 in Southport. Or you could before Covid 19 ruined the world. But yeah THREE BAGS. Poundland sometimes sell little tubs of tricolour candy floss but they’re £1 each. Rip off, especially if you’re in southport. Just leave poundland and go up the road to the pier and go into one of the shops opposite the arcade. THREE BAGS!! For £1!! I went to a fair once and it was 99p for one stick!

So. Character A has fucked up and they want to buy a bar of chocolate as an apology to Character B. They’’d either get a big cadbury’s milk bar or a galaxy bar. Our galaxy bars are American’s Mars Dove bars. (Dove here is a bar of soap). If they’re feeling fancy, they might buy a Cadbury’s Milk Tray, which is a box of chocolates, and if they’re feeling Really fancy and really apologetic, they might get a Cadbury’s Dairy Box. And if they have really, really fucked up and want to fork out a bit of money, they would get a Thornton’s Classic. And if the Basic Classic doesn’t scream “I am so fucking sorry for what I did” enough, they would get the continental box.

If it’s just a show of affection of a random Tuesday, they might get the heart shaped box. D’aww.

Character A  wants to munch something at the cinema? No worries. The cinema sells every Nestle sweet you can name (Modern times the sharing pouches are £3.89 though, cinema prices!! Go to B&M or Home Bargains before you go to the cinema and buy from there instead, and with some cinemas you don’t even have to sneak them in cos they don’t care), plus there’s a full wall of Pic’n’mix. 

Liquourice All Sorts Jellybeans Jelly Babies Jazzies - Milk chocolate disc-like sweets with hundreds and thousands on them Snowies - White chocolate disc-like sweets with hundreds and thousands on them Pear drops - boiled sweets in the shape of a pear, sort of taste like pear, and all that sugar hurts your mouth after about 2 o them Footballs - Round solid chocolate balls Torpedos - Jellybeans with a solid outer layer Strawberry Laces Raspberry Laces Cola Bottles Fizzy Cola Bottles Milk Bottles - Chewy sweets in the shape of a milk bottle. Foam Shrimps - Soft chewy sweets in the shape of prawns. Foam Bananas - Soft chewy sweets in the shape of bananas, very sweet Foam Mushrooms - Soft chewy sweets in the shape of mushrooms Black Jacks - Liqourice flavoured chew squares, like chewits Mojos - Varoety of flavours of chewy squares, like chewits, but HAVE BEEN DISCONTINUED SINCE 2012!!! Chocolate covered raisins Chocolate covered peanuts Chocolate covered Brazil nuts Space Ships - HORRIBLE sweets which is edible paper filled with sherbert in the shape of a traditional space ship Rasberry Bombs - Only in some pic-n-mix, not sure how long they were around for, they were sour chewy balls of raspberry flavoured jelly sweets. Not to be confused with Berries Berries - Raspberry and Blackcurrant flavoured jelly sweets. Apparently very nice and soft. Milk Chocolate Mice - Horrible cheap chocolate in the shape of mice White chocolate Mice - Same as above, but worse.

And you can buy any of those in a sweet shop, in little bags as well.

Other sweets not usually found in a pic’n’mix

Penny Toffees - They were small toffee discs that you could literally buy one for a penny each.

Teeth - Chewy sweets in the shape of false teeth. Vampire editions at halloween.

Strawberry softies - They were discontinued around about 2008, but a cheap company now do them and you can only get them in poundland! But they taste exactly the same. They are foam-like sweets, in the shape of a heart-shaped strawberry, and they just melt in your mouth.

Aniseed balls - Hard boiled sweets, strong aniseed flavour. Very popular with aunties. I get called an old lady whenever I buy them.

Lipstick Pops - A hard boiled sweet in the shape of a lipstick. I don’t know any kid who just ate and sucked on it like you were meant to eat it, everybody pretended they were putting on lipstick when they had one.

Now the few more acceptable usages of the word ‘Candy’

Candy necklaces - a ring of string you could wear around your neck, in theory, full of little sweet disc like beads.

Candy bracelets - same as above, but smaller for your wrists

A retro sweet that is no longer here cos it was discontinued in the 1980s, was called Spangle, and it’s slogan was “The Sweet Way to go gay”. I am not joking.

Some chocolate bars that were around a few decades ago, for when your fic is set in the 60s and 70s ;)

Fry’s Chocolate Cream which was/is dark chocolate full of fondant, still around today, unlike Fry’s Five Centres which were discontinued in the 1990s, brought back for a limited edition and then gone again. They were dark chocolate bars with flavoured fondant in the middle - Orange, Lime, Blackcurrant, Coffee and Raspberry. They now do a mint flavour bar and recently brought back the raspberry flavoured bar. Some people incorrectly called them Fry’s Five Senses, which was actually mixing up two different products apparently, but I don’t know anything about that other product. I think it was hot chocolate.

Wagon Wheels - Like two chocolate biscuit discs with marshmallow in the middle, and then the Jammie one has strawberry jam in the middle as well. They are still around today but a classic of my parents teenage years.

Caramac - My mum, god rest her soul, talked about this chocolate bar fondly. They did bring it back but “It’s not the same!” and they discontinued it again and brought it back again. Wikipedia describes it as “ a light Brown colour, and is manufactured using sweetened condensed milk, butter, various flavourings, and sugar “

The much acclaimed Aztec bar. To be honest, the way my parents described it, it’s a bit like a snickers bar without the nuts, so I guess like a mars bar, but apparently it was a lot nicer than a mars bar.

And this is not a sweet but if you have a brit in your fic and you don’t know where they would buy any of these sweets, well you just send them to Woolworths. If they’re a kid and want to spend their pocket money on some sweets, have them weigh out some from the pic’n’mix and we will all be happy bunniess

[graduationemmasep]

'I like the way MDMA gives you a deep sense of connection to your friends'

I'm no fiend. Most nights I'd rather share a bottle of wine with some friends than stay up till 6am getting sweaty and boggle-eyed on a bender. But while I associate alcohol with talking about past experiences, I associate drugs with making new ones. Party drugs can often make a stranger feel like a confidant; a simple trip to a town centre feel like an Enid Blyton escapade.

I probably take class-A party drugs such as MDMA or cocaine once a fortnight, and have done since I was 16 (I'm 27 now). I like the way cocaine gives you a new lease of life, like a mushroom in Super Mario, to carry on with a night out. I like the way MDMA softens the edges of reality and gives you a deep sense of connection to your friends that you can never get when you meet them for dinner and they moan about their jobs. I like how when you're coming down from a pill another person's touch has a comforting, almost electric capacity. If you're suffering from exhaustion, anxiety or stress, recreational drugs can give you a bit of a leg-up.

Drugs can also be a total pain. Ecstasy can make you feel like you're floating in a cloud, but just as often it's an admin nightmare: you come up at different times from your friends; only half the people in a group remembered to get sorted and there's endless hassle at a party trying to get more. Even when you're having a great time, there's a self-doubting internal monologue running through the whole process: Have I done enough? Am I coming up? Do I look like a prick?

I would just like to have that conversation about drugs being sometimes brilliant and occasionally annoying. Yet I feel like there is no one who is willing to talk about drugs in those terms.

When children ask their parents where babies come from, they get a white lie – a stork delivers them, you find them in a cabbage patch, you order them from Ocado. That's the closest thing I can think of to explain the difference between the perception and the reality of drug use by young people in the UK. There is a societal stork myth that is propagated by the media and popular culture to hide a basic reality. Even users themselves are entirely unwilling to talk about drug-taking honestly. Everything in the drugs world tries to stifle this conversation. Take nightclubs. It doesn't take a genius to work out that staying up till 6am listening to dance music at an ear-splitting volume would not only be unenjoyable without some kind of mind-altering stimulant, but a painful test of endurance. Most people in big nightclubs are on drugs. The clubs know that: that's why they charge so much for entry and, often, for bottles of water. They know that not many people will be buying drinks. Most of them have in-house dealers too, so they can sort out their DJs. Bigger DJs put requests for drugs on their rider. "We just put it on expenses as 'fruit and flowers'," a promoter at a major nightclub told me this year. But there's still a stork charade, with the venue covered in posters promising to eject drug users and bouncers searching punters – but not too thoroughly. The pretence is that this could all be above board.

I suppose the reason for this false picture of drug-taking is that most people don't take drugs. The statistics show that only a small fraction of the UK population are regular drugs users, and a smaller fraction still do anything harder than weed. But drug use is not spread evenly across the country, nor across age groups. In my demographic – under 30, living in London, job in the creative industries, disposable income – almost everyone is a recreational drugs user.

Where I grew up in south London, it was pretty uncommon to find someone who didn't at least smoke weed. The children of more middle-class parents were taking cocaine, ecstasy, ketamine and mephedrone almost every weekend. These were not reprobates ruining their lives: they were intelligent, bright people who got three As at A-level and went to good universities.

We would go to raves in places such as Camberwell and Hackney Wick, to warehouse venues where almost no one was over 18. White powders flowed as freely as the Fanta Fruit Twist and Malibu we were drinking. Festivals played a big part, too. Parents, even quite strict ones who wouldn't dream of letting their kids out past midnight, were happy to send their kids to music festivals, perhaps because of the reverent music-focused coverage in the media.

If you go to somewhere like Reading or Benicàssim, almost everyone is under 20. Half of them barely leave the campsite. Festivals are drugs playgrounds where teenagers experiment with copious amounts of uppers in presumably quite dangerous combinations. Some of the best moments of my life took place going to festivals as a teenager. I remember one muddy year at Glastonbury, racing down the hill arm-in-arm with a bunch of people, all off our faces on MDMA, feeling happier than I had ever felt. Another year, I remember taking mephedrone with a girl I fancied during Blur's headline set, both weeping with joy at a band we'd grown up with our whole lives.

Again, everyone knows this; no one thinks the thousands who watch the sunrise at the stone circle in Glastonbury every year are just on a high from seeing Mumford and Sons. But the festivals keep up the pretence that they are drug-free zones. Even a recent BBC3 show, Festivals, Sex and Suspicious Parents, which was supposed to show parents what their kids really got up to at festivals, ignored the fact that as the cameras panned around the festival, many revellers were plainly as high as a kite, their jaws swinging back and forth like pendulums, a side-effect of taking ecstasy. The voiceover just kept talking about people being "drunk".

I am also part of the first generation of people whose parents are likely to have been drug users. Of course, some adults would be outraged, like the parents on BBC3, to see what their kids got up to. But many more knew only too well – plenty of people I know would smoke weed or share dealers with their parents. In some families drug use had less stigma than smoking.

I thought all this was normal, but at university I met, for the first time, young people who totally abstained from drugs. They mostly came from outside major cities, or outside the UK, and many shivered in horror when they saw the rest of us dabbing our gums with mysterious white powders. I thought there would be a rift in social lives, an us-and-them situation, but it was around that time that mephedrone happened. Known by literally no young person ever as "meow meow", mephedrone was a legal high that changed attitudes towards drug-taking. Polite do-right kids who would never dream of taking illegal drugs were happy to chow down on bombs (self-made wontons of mephedrone powder wrapped in Rizla) like they were no more risqué than chocolate liqueurs.

Mephedrone was incredibly cheap – about a tenner a gram – and incredibly available. You could order it with next-day delivery to your university PO box. Mephedrone was a drugs phenomenon of which I have never seen the likes before or since. Everyone started doing it. I remember visiting a friend at Leeds University during this period. We went to a club and the queue for the men's bogs was at least 70 people long. When I finally got inside the place stunk of mephedrone, you could hear everyone loudly sniffing.

On nights out during this time, everyone would be raging – making out with one another, dancing with total abandon. But the comedowns were immediate and severe, far worse than ecstasy. By 4am people would be lying on the floor sharing the most intimate and personal shames and secrets, as if the drug was somehow compelling them to be honest. Some people called it a truth serum. Friendships were forged in the hot irons of that emotional exposition, as were the most horrendous hangovers.

Mephedrone was banned within two years of it taking off. People talk a lot about one legal high being banned only for another to take its place, but the real legacy of mephedrone was to numb the stigma of harder drugs. By the time I left university, many of the drug abstainers who had tried mephedrone became relaxed about most illegal drugs, too.

Ecstasy and mephedrone make it pretty hard to get much done in the days after taking them. You can't regularly use them and be a successful, functioning adult, so they become a rarer treat once you leave student life. In their 20s most people are overworked: they have second jobs and work incredibly long hours. If they're going to go out on a Friday night they need a pick-me-up. And that is why cocaine remains the young professional's drug of choice.

I see cocaine usage almost every weekend wherever I go: clubs, pubs, people's houses, dinner parties. At fancy celebrity parties, the sort you see on Mail Online, cocaine is so prevalent that it's almost boring. Everyone does it – butter-wouldn't-melt TV presenters, wholesome pop stars adored by your mum, people who would immediately lose their job if anyone found out. Those tabloid stings where they catch someone doing cocaine are kind of hilarious in that respect. If you followed any celebrity around with a secret camera on a Friday night you'd be almost guaranteed to find them doing coke. But cocaine users are like hipsters in the way they will vehemently deny they are one, and cast aspersions on others. "It was just full of self-aggrandising wankers doing coke and talking about themselves," someone will say about a party where they did cocaine and talked about themselves. Most of my friends are cocaine users, but I've never heard them say one nice thing about cocaine.

No doubt some people will have read this piece and think that I am just a monstrous twat, that this has all been little more than infantile boasting in a vain attempt to try to sound cool. But that, too, is part of the cover-up, that any open discussion of using drugs or enjoying them is necessarily a boast. We can talk about great food, great films, great sex, but if we talk about great drugs we immediately sound like we're engaging in some teenage bravado. That's why the biggest taboo surrounding drugs today isn't taking drugs, but saying that they're fun.

I'm not saying that people are lying about the negative effects. I have, of course, seen lives ruined by drugs. Rarely has this been because of an overdose or because someone has ruined themselves financially because of addiction (although I am only 27 – that may yet come). Far more often I have just seen people become dulled through regular drug use: their youthful spark extinguished by a never-ceasing quest to get on it; brains frazzled by overheated synapses. There are friends I want to slap every time I see them doing another line, but I can't because that would be hypocritical.

I also appreciate that's it's easy to be blasé about drug use when you're a well-adjusted middle-class white guy who has never been stopped by the police and has a distant non-social relationship with their drug dealer. For many people, drugs aren't something they can dip in and out of and separate from their lives. People entangled in the economic and legal realities of drugs – dealers, those convicted of possession, addicts – don't have the luxury of my relaxed attitude.

But until we stop pretending that getting high is inherently bad – that drugs can never be brilliant, can never enhance human experience for the better – how can we properly deal with people whose lives have been made worse by drugs? At some point, kids grow up and learn the facts of life. I think it's time we all had the talk.

[ibelieveinahappilyeverafter]

Putting the Cat in Catastrophe Chapter 2

Bonjour! A little later than half an hour, but I had to eat first - cream of mushroom soup is very good, by the way. Enjoy the new chapter!

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Summary:  Danny Fenton has just escaped from a secret government testing facility and runs straight into Andrew Riter - a busybody librarian who seems to be obsessed with helping a stray black cat - said stray black cat happening to be Danny himself. The Government gets interested when they find out a seemingly ordinary human can shapeshift into different animals. Danny just wants to return to his family and try to find his lost memories, but he's having a hard time doing so when he's finding less and less reasons for leaving Andrew's side. He couldn't tell anyone his secret - not again - but... But why did he want to trust this man so badly? (Iambic Prose) (Shapeshifter Danny AU)

Warnings for: Laboratory testing, mentions of vivisections and dissections (nothing physical shown on screen), and references to bleeding

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Chapter Two

::

He had once heard that an optimistic outlook could make even the worst day into a great one. He heard that as long as you faced the day with a smile and didn't let it break you, no matter what was happening, it would get better. The smile would become real and the day would be good no matter what bad things happened.

Danny Fenton would really like to scratch the eyes out of whoever the fuck had said that. He would settle for biting, of course, but scratching the eyes out seemed like a reasonable reaction to a pile of garbage like that.

Look, the point was that Danny was having a very difficult night- Day? Morning? He wasn't sure what time it was exactly, but the last twenty-four hours had been hell. It was to the point that he was curled up in a stranger's lap and that was the normal part of the day. Danny was tired, exhausted, hurt, and he was pretty sure he should be biting and scratching the guy who was bawling his eyes out in an alleyway, but judging by his story his day was going about as well as Danny's.

So, here he was. Sitting on the lap of a guy who was probably trying to pretend that was rainwater on his cheeks and not tears. Danny kind of felt bad for the guy. Or, he would, if he wasn't- Ugh. It had been a day. Black cats were nowhere near lucky and Danny had the proof to back it all up!

"You've had a very tough life, haven't you?" The man's voice was quiet - almost as if he was afraid of being heard. Danny could sympathize. Sighing and collapsing further into the man's touch, Danny frowned as he felt a purr rumble out of him.

'You have no idea.' His life had been one giant shitstorm of one bad thing after another, but that morning - last night? - had been the worst one yet. It had started out hopeful, too.

::

"It's already been another year?" Danny looked in surprise at the chocolate bar that was held in front of him, taking it quickly when it was almost pulled away. "Hey, hey, I'm not complaining!"

"All you do is complain to me." Yeah, to Vlad, and that was because Vlad was the only scientist that wasn't completely insane and put in requests to vivisection him. "Five years since you arrived."

"Five years of torture," Danny snorted, tearing the packaging open with his teeth and taking a large bite at once, beaming at the taste. It had been an entire year since he last had something chocolate. "Five years of nothing but this place."

"Hey." Vlad pushed the chocolate bar down before he could take another bite, Danny frowning as he looked into the stare that wasn't quite disappointment, but also wasn't quite reproachful. "You're doing better."

"Yeah, I can remember my childhood bed and my favorite cartoon. Big progress." Taking another big bite, Danny glared at Vlad in defiance. Vlad just rolled his eyes as he began taking Danny's vitals. "Yeah, wow, so much has changed from my last torture session."

"Hush. You know they don't like when you use that word." Yeah, cause Danny was just a little too human for them. At least, he usually was. "You seem to be doing well with the new regime they put you on."

"Doesn't feel like it. I'm still getting the cold and heat flashes every few hours." All Vlad did was offer him a weak smile - that was all he could do right now. "'S fine, I'll get used to it like all the other stuff."

"Ye… Yes." Oh, no, Danny did not like the way Vlad said that. He was also being given a second chocolate bar which meant bad news. Vlad, the dick, waited until his mouth was full of chocolate to speak again. "You're leaving tonight."

It took a good ten seconds for Danny to stop himself from choking and swallow the bite in his mouth, gasping for breath and, "What?!" There was no way- "You're joking. That's cruel- Even for you that's cruel."

"I'm not joking, Daniel." He wasn't joking. He wasn't… Five years. Danny had been here five years and he- He couldn't remember the before, so it was fine, right? This was all he knew so it was fine. Not good, but he was surviving. Yeah, sure, okay, he wanted to stop all the pain and shit, but… "You're seventeen, you've been here five years, and they've learned all they can from you while you're alive."

"What… What do you mean while I'm alive?" He'd been here since he was twelve and five years wasn't enough to learn everything about him, right? "Vlad, what do you mean-"

"They've studied your body as much as they can while keeping it working, Daniel. What do you think happens when they've performed all the vivisections they need?" Vlad's voice was hard and rough, the man clutching at his clipboard and looking ready to break it in half. "What's the difference between a vivisection and an autopsy?"

"The first one is for subjects that are alive and the second is for- Oh." They were going to kill him. They were going to see just how everything worked when they had all the time in the world to pick him apart and study him. "When?"

"Tonight." Silent, Danny stared down at his chocolate, one wrapper empty and the other still having near a full chocolate bar.

"Kind of a dick move considering it's my birthday and all." They were going to kill him. They were going to kill him and there was nothing- Leaving. "You're serious."

"As much as you like to cast disparities upon my character, I don't want to see a child die in front of me." Resisting the urge to argue about the child bit, Danny quietly took another bite of chocolate. "Will it make you feel better if I told you I've been working on this plan for four years, now?"

"Four years? But that's…" That was when Vlad was assigned as his caretaker within the labs. He was the one in charge of making sure he didn't die in his sleep, basically. Four years would have meant that Vlad had been working on this plan since the beginning - since they had first met. "You didn't even know me back then. I was nothing but a subject."

"Please." Vlad gave him the look he usually did when Danny was being an idiot. "You were thirteen years old and you cried quietly when they first brought you to me. Children don't cry quietly unless they've given up."

"To be fair, thirteen isn't a child at that point," Danny grumbled, finishing off his chocolate bar and dropping the wrappers onto the table beside him. "This plan of yours. Would it even work? We've been through plans before." Danny wasn't the only one to dream of escape, but he was the only one who wasn't an idiot and ran off as soon as a door was open.

"Four years is a lot of time to work out the kinks in a plan." Mm. That wasn't a very good answer, but then, Vlad wasn't much of a fan of yes or no answers. "Daniel… This is your last chance. I won't let it fail."

"How much danger is it going to put you in?" There was the soft sound of pencil scratching against paper on a clipboard, Danny steadily watching Vlad as he refused to answer the question. Didn't that just tell him everything he needed to know, too. "There's no way I'm doing this if it's going to hurt you-"

"I, at least, won't be cut open on a table without a heartbeat in a few hours." The words weren't screamed, but they might as well have been with how cold they were. "We're doing this and you can either cooperate or I can resort to plan B where you don't have to be conscious."

"That's cruel." He shouldn't. Danny shouldn't be feeling like this was possible. It was just talk. Words that were nothing but noise. He shouldn't be getting excited over the chance that he could actually be free. "This is cruel, Vlad, even by your standards."

"Whatever made you think I was a nice man?" Vlad patted at his cheek, hand resting there for a moment before he sighed and dropped it to Danny's shoulder. "Just hope, Daniel. For a few more hours, just have trust in me and hope."

"I was supposed to spend the rest of my life in here." That was how it was supposed to go. He'd be the government's lab rat, he'd get used to never having his memories back, and he'd just live out the rest of his life in a government testing facility. "That was how it was supposed to be."

"Yes, well, I've rather found that planning ahead never quite works like one would expect." Vlad sighed, meeting Danny's gaze again. "I'm going to tell you as much about your past as I know and when you get out you're going to find them. They'll welcome you back without hesitation."

"How can you be sure? How can you- I've been gone for five years. Whatever they felt for me is probably- They probably thought I was dead and had a funeral, Vlad. Who wants a dead kid back in their lives?"

"Daniel, they will accept you - your parents, especially. Once you have children… Everything changes. You'll return to them, to Jack and Maddie Fenton, and you'll have a home again. A real one."

"Vlad- Vlad, I only remember a few things. My childhood bed, my favorite cartoon, and the color purple. That's not- That's nowhere near enough to actually survive-"

"You, little badger, give yourself too little credit." Trying not to laugh at the nickname, Danny shook his head. "And yes, I am never going to let you forget that."

"I panicked and you were wearing a white lab coat and I heard someone talking about honey badgers that day. I can't be blamed for what happened." Humor. Humor helped cover up everything else. That was all he needed, right? "Vlad… If it wasn't for you then my first memory would have been waking up in those labs. They've taken everything from me."

"And you can get it back. They didn't take your memories, Daniel, you hid them away. I've told you this." Yeah, yeah, psychology and repression, and everything, but… He had to have hid them away for a reason. Maybe it was because they hurt too much. "You're going to be okay."

"Right. Okay." He could believe in one more lie, right? Besides, if it was the last lie he'd ever believe in, then, well. It wasn't a bad one. "What's this plan of yours, then?"

::

"This is the last test for this subject, then?" As usual, the scientists preferred to think he was nothing but the animals he shifted into. Danny hoped he could bite at least one of them before he left.

"Yes, after this we move him to F-121." The dissection labs. Fuck, Vlad hadn't been kidding at all, then, had he? "Make sure he's strapped in tightly. They're expecting him in half an hour."

"All secure." The bands around his wrists and ankles were checked, Danny staying still and silent and he just had to have patience. He just had to be patient and wait for the right moment. That didn't mean he liked the fact that he was on his stomach his back was facing them. "Do you think they'll let us study his brain one last time before they put him under?"

Tuning the conversation out, Danny focused on pushing away the pain that came from their scalpels slicing into him, his paper gown pushed away as the strings were cut. As soon as he got out of here he was going to find the largest, softest clothes he could and never take them off.

Just as it seemed like the pain was going to overwhelm him, the blaring ringing of alarm bells had all three of them startling, Danny looking up with wide eyes as the room began to be washed out with red colors.

"The contamination warning? Shit, is it airborne?" The scalpels left his skin and Danny heard the door of the room unlock itself, a pre-recorded voice sounding over the speakers.

"Attention, this is not a drill. An airborne contaminant has been released into the compound. Please escort yourselves to the designated safe spots. Attention, this is not a drill. An airborne contaminant-" Signal. That was a hell of a signal.

Closing his eyes, Danny breathed out slowly before sucking another breath in and centering his thoughts. If one thing could be said about this hellhole, at least it had taught him just what he could do and what he was capable of.

"Should we- Fuck. The subject-" Too late. Throwing himself off the table, Danny hit the floor in a scramble of four paws, rat tail flicking sharply before he gave himself over to his instincts and ran. He knew a scrap of black fur and blue eyes could be easily lost in the chaos that was now happening - at least, to those who weren't looking.

Warm hands scooped him up, Danny opening his mouth wide and flashing sharp teeth and- "If you bite me, Daniel, then I will make sure to throw you into the trash compactor." Danny nipped Vlad's finger in defiance, laughing to himself as he was dropped into the man's pocket.

'No sense of humor at all.' Danny curled up in the pocket, slowly peeking out as Vlad ran through the halls, alarms still flashing and blaring and making the whole building a confusing den of sound and movement. 'C'mon, Vladdie, running out of time.'

"You remember the plan?" No, he obviously forgot between here and- Of course he remembered the plan! Danny hadn't let Vlad leave until he could recite it by heart! "Get ready to shift, I'm about to drop you off at the right vent."

It was only a few moments of Danny wondering what vent it would be at before Vlad was stopping and picking him up gently, hesitating as he stroked a thumb down Danny's back. "Be safe, little badger."

'I won't forget this, Vlad.' Danny knew Vlad couldn't hear his thoughts, but it was nice to pretend. 'I promise.' As soon as Danny's paws touched the ground he was shifting into a raccoon and flexing his 'hands' before fighting to get the screws off of the air vent. It didn't take long before he managed to get them off. Ignoring his cuts on his hands - paws? - and the blood he could feel streaking down his back, Danny closed his eyes and shifted his body once more, panting to get his breath back as he balanced on four paws.

Back-to-back shifting always took it out of him considering how much his body was changing and how quickly it was, but he didn't have a choice much as the moment. "-he's escaping!" Fuck.

"Run and don't look back." Looking up at Vlad with sharp cat eyes, Danny yowled as he was near kicked into the vent, Vlad yelling at him. "Daniel, run!"

Knowing better than to question and not stupid enough to stick around and help, Danny pushed his tears back and ran down the vent, paws quick and sure and stride not breaking once as he bounded across the flexing metal ducts. He didn't stop until something was breaking and clattering and he hit cold pavement, and even then he only stopped long enough to coil his strength together before running again.

He didn't look back and he didn't stop. Cats were fast and they were fleet footed. They weren't meant to run for long periods of time, though, so as soon as Danny crashed into the woods he shifted into a small breed of hunting hound and kept running steadily ahead. It had to be near a mile before he felt as if his heart would beat right out of his chest and yet he still didn't stop. He couldn't. He couldn't.

If he stopped, for even a moment, then there was a chance he would be captured. There was a chance he would be captured, and killed, and he would find out that Vlad- As long as he kept running then he could pretend. He could pretend that he really could get away and get his memories back. He could pretend there was family out there waiting for him. He could pretend that Vlad was safe and had been fired and he was able to leave.

He wasn't sure how long it was or how long he had been running until the crunch of leaves and uneven dirt gave way for smooth, hard pavement once more, Danny gulping down air as he slowed only long enough to change back into the sleek form of a cat - and even then he didn't stay completely still. He couldn't. He was finally free. He was finally able to run and god- God. It was raining. It was raining. Danny hadn't felt rain since… He didn't know when, but it was more than five years ago, that was for sure.

Danny ran as he let the rain wash away his blood and soak him to the bone, the shivering so preferable to the burning, all consuming pain he had been feeling. He ran and he ran and he ran until he stumbled into an alleyway and saw the first human he had seen outside the labs. The man was probably a few years older than him, had scruffy black hair and green eyes, and looked to be having as bad a day as Danny.

He stopped only to get his breath back and let himself rest. That was it. Or at least, that was supposed to be it. Instead he had ended up curled up in the man's lap and not even hissing or minding the fingers that were running through his fur. Danny knew how bad days could make people unpredictable, but this man just looked like he wanted to go home, curl up into a ball, and cry.

Yeah, okay, so the guy was off his rocker insane thinking black cats were lucky and talking to him like he could understand everything he was saying, but Danny could handle being used as a cuddle toy for a few more minutes if it meant he didn't have to deal with a crying person.

Slumping against the fingers, Danny heaved a breath as it finally felt like his heart wasn't about to explode. 'Okay. Okay, your last name is Fenton. You're seventeen and you disappeared when you were twelve. Your birthday is April 3rd. Your full name is Daniel James Fenton and you're looking for your family, Jack, Madeline, and Jasmine Fenton. Your bedspread was blue and you liked glow in the dark stars and your favorite cartoon show had something to do with spaceships and aliens. You love the color purple. You and your family lived in Amity Park.'

Okay… Okay. He needed to find a way to get to this Amity Park. He wasn't sure which way he had run, but judging by the fact it had to be near the afternoon he had been running for hours, at least. He had never travelled outside the lab and it had been small, so he had probably been in a smaller lab simply so they didn't risk losing him in transport. That meant even if he wasn't in Amity Park, he had to be close. That meant they were close, too, though.

Right. Staying as a cat would be best right now. Cats were swift, agile, and small enough to not be seen. No doubt they would be searching the skies for a few weeks, so he had to be careful. They wouldn't expect him to stay as an animal for so long. The question was, how long would it take to convince them that he was dead or long gone? They had to assume he'd go back home, so was his family in danger? What if-

"Come on, petit chaton. Let's get out of this rain." Yowling as the human stood and jostled him, Danny was ready to bite and claw before the man was shifting the umbrella so Danny would stay dry and adjusting him carefully. "You are rather hurt, aren't you… Maybe Randy can help you."

Danny should jump. He should jump down, run away, and leave because otherwise he was about to be taken in as a pet… They wouldn't expect him to be a pet. 'You might have just saved my life, you know.' If he could hide out as a pet for a few weeks, it would at least give him time to decide on what to do.

"Well, since I've already lost my sanity by talking to a cat, let's assume you're smart enough to realize what I'm doing. My name is Andrew Riter and I'll be taking you somewhere where you can get food and medical treatment."

'Oh my god, you're a nerd. Do you go around to other animals and expect them to understand you? This isn't a Disney movie!' If nothing else, at least Danny knew he wasn't about to be cut open anymore. The crazy purple coat the guy was wearing might even be a good sign - purple had always been his lucky color. That was enough, for right now.

It had to be.

[dine-on-nervine]

Describe the last (or current) object you sat on. I’m in my pleather desk chair.

What was your favourite toy when you were a kid? I don’t recall having a favorite.

What weird thing do you eat that most people dislike? Grapefruit and mushrooms comes to mind. I have no idea why so many people say they don’t like them.

Would you change your name if you got married? Probably not, but I’m not totally adverse because I hate my middle and last names.

Were you in any clubs in high school? Which ones? French and Science.

What time do you generally wake up? My eyes open around 7 due to the sunshine, but I usually actually start coming to life about 8:20am.

Do you share a bathroom with anyone? The one roomie. I am not a fan of this for various reasons.

Are there any songs you know every single lyric to? Yes.

How many amusement parks have you visited? Not sure I’ve ever been to one. Closest one I can think of was Bedrock USA in Arizona over a decade ago, and even then I didn’t pay to get into the park... the gift shop and a Bronto Burger at the cafe in it were quite close enough.

Who is your favourite character from the show Friends? Never watched it. So... Smelly Cat.

Do you have any leftovers in your fridge right now? I have three portions of mashed potatoes and one portion of barbecued chicken in my freezer, which will get me a ways into next week’s lunches at work.

What was the last job interview you attended? Late March of last year, for the job I have now.

Have you ever had a panic attack? Nope, through once or twice felt frantic like that was going to happen.

Where do you keep most of your clothes? In the dresser.

What’s your favourite kind of frosting? Any kind of chocolate frosting is good with me. << Also a fan of cream cheese frosting on spicecake or carrotcake.

Who is the most annoying celebrity in your opinion? Every single person who is directly or tangentally related to Kris Kardashian. There’s fucking NOTHING to say about these people, so it’s really the media giving them oxygen that bothers me. No one give a fuck about anyone they’ve fucked, either, especially when they have no innate comprehension of When To Shut The Fuck Up And Go Back To Their High-Paying Jobs to do something they actually are good at. And Caitlyn, bless you for what you bring to the trans* community, but you’re still on the wrong side politically for where your life is going and no one takes you seriously when it comes to this new bid to run California.

Do you prefer watching movies or TV shows? I prefer talking to someone with a silent background.

What decorations do you have in your bedroom? Over two dozen framed apple box labels, a few framed postcards, Disapproving Dana over my bed to keep me humble, and some mushroom art.

What was the last notification you got on your phone? Girlfriend telling me she’ll be going to bed in, uh, about ten minutes from now, because after she gets into bed she’ll call me to tell me about her day.

What career or study were you really interested in but didn’t pursue? Psychology.

Where do you buy most of your groceries? Winco.

Have you ever taken a painting class? Nope.

Is there a store or restaurant where you’re considered a regular? Red Barn fruitstand.

How far do you have to travel from home to get to school or work? Work is about ten miles away.

Did you use Vine back when it still existed? I didn’t.

Are you more creative or analytical? Analytical.

How do you like your eggs? On someone else’s plate. Scrambled if I have to have them.

How old were you when you started wearing a bra, if ever? I’ve never started wearing a bra. ;-)

What was the last video game you played? Circus Convoy for the Atari 2600.

Are there any recipes you really want to try? Probably, I can’t name any off the top of my head.

Has anyone asked how you feel today? I believe my girlfriend asked how I slept, but I haven’t been asked how I feel in a day or two (post-vaccination). Okay, wait, yesterday I had a dentist appointment and they’re obliged to ask how I feel, when it comes to healthiness.

Well, how do you feel today? It was my Friday so good. But less so after I left because a) I forgot to clock out, and b) I left my clipboard on a shelf when I meant to bring it home [and put what’s on it on the receiving desk].

On that note, how have you been feeling lately? Pretty okay, happy, a bit sore in places and attribute whatever headache I have to my physical labor and my not having any caffiene today.

Have you ever received a speeding fine? Yes, a few times.

Would you rather be incredibly smart or incredibly beautiful? Smart. So I already have this metric. :)

What’s your favourite cookie? Chocolate chip, though will never turn down a peanut butter cookie.

Do you have a doorbell at your house? What I know is there are two wires sticking out where a real doorbell had been, and a plastic one has been pasted on yet I don’t think I’ve ever heard it so I can’t prove it even has working batteries.

What percentage charge is your phone on right now? 100%, since it’s been plugged in since I got home.

What was the last app you had open on your phone? The messenger.

Do you use captions when you watch TV and movies? Not intentionally since while it does help with understanding I get so distracted by them I don’t see what’s going on, I only see the words.

What’s your skincare routine? Facial soap in the shower here, a very gentle face wash cream at my girlfriend’s house.

Have you ever visited someone in a psychiatric home or ward? Yes.

Do you spell it colour, or color? Color.

How tall are you? 5′11″.

What was the last movie you watched? In the theatre, it ws Star Wars: Episode 9 - Fuck Canon, We’re Ending This. On the computer, it might have been Star Wars: Rogue 1 (Episode 3.5). In front of the television, I have no idea but suspect it was a year ago when David Spade at 55 attempted to play the same 25-30 year old putz he always plays in movies.

[rex101111]

Izuocha week 2017: Firsts.

THE FIRST OF HOPEFULLY SEVEN (THOUGH DON’T COUNT ON IT) DRABBLES FOR IZUOCHA WEEK!!

Since I knew most people would go for something simple like confessions, dates, or first kisses, I decided for something a bit out there, hopefully to make up for how short this is, but either way enjoy!

Izuku looked intently at the piece of paper in his hands, on it a simple list of about ten or so items, nodding to himself as he wrote down one more item, before looking up to lock eyes with his fairly pregnant wife who looked back a bit guiltily while she worried a lock of her mid length brown hair, though Izuku only graced her with a smile that she felt was altogether far more patient than she deserved, “Anything else?”

Ochako bit her lower lip, her other hand absentmindedly rubbing circles on her stomach, “Um…pickles?” She cringed as soon as she said it, but couldn’t get the craving out of her head, and Izuku barely flinched, writing down her request with a small, slightly tired smile.

As she looked to the side to see the time on her digital bedside clock, the flashing green numbers reading, “1:13 AM” made her heart sink a little, she could hardly blame him for being tired.

“Y-you know,” She started again, a worried smile on her face, “You could save this for the morning! I’m really not that hun-“

“Ochako,” He says with a knowing smile, the sound of her name coming from him still making a blush raise to her cheeks, “It’s not a problem!” He grins, “You can count on me, so don’t worry.”

She let out a breath, “B-but just look at the time!” She says, pointing to the clock, Izuku following her hand and giving a look like he only now just realized how late, or rather how early, it was, “Where are you even going to find a place that sells half of the things here that’s still open?”

Izuku shook his head, “My mom gave me a bunch of places that stay open all day and night when we moved in,” He gestured to the door, “And the closest place isn’t that far! It’ll take me ten minutes tops-“

“That’s not the problem!” She shouted suddenly, her hormones getting the better of her for a moment as her eyes grew slightly wet, “I just…” She sniffed before letting out a tired sigh, “I just don’t want to bother you Deku…”

Izuku looked at her for a moment, before getting up and hugging Ochako from behind, resting his chin on her shoulder while his arms gently circled her midsection, “You’re not a bother,” He kissed the side of her neck gently, “Nothing you do can ever bother me, okay?”  

She’s quiet, biting her lip, “All I’ve been doing lately is bother you…” She whispers, “Getting the house ready, the doctor’s appointments, this,” She gestures weakly towards the list, “And pretty soon I won’t be able to even leave the house and-“

“I want to do it,” He says, stopping her rambling, “All of it, baby proofing the house, going to the doctor,” He laughs a little, “Even going out in the middle of the night to go buy you,” He takes another peak at the list before laughing a little again, “Some…radishes with chocolate,” He shakes his head, “Your mom and mine weren’t kidding about those cravings huh?”

Ochako, despite herself, laughed along with him, “Oh don’t remind me, my mom told me about the time she spent a week eating pizza with wasabi…” She stops for a moment, a minor rumbling in her stomach lifting an idea to her head, “Um…could you-?”

“On the list,” Her husband says with an overly dramatic sigh, sitting down and adding her request, “I think that should do it.” He looks up at her, eyes a bit apprehensive despite his apparent willingness, “…right?”

She laughs at the face he makes, “Yeah, I think that’s enough,” She looks apologetic again, “Seriously, I still feel a little bad sending you off like this.”

“And I still say it’s okay,” He smiles as he folds up his list and grabs his wallet before stopping with an expression of deep thought, “Though, considering I’m technically the reason you have these cravings in the first place, it’d be my duty to do this shopping either way right?”

Ochako does an exasperated spit take, “Alright already!” She laughs as she walks to the kitchen, “Just get going before it gets any later.” She opens a drawer and takes out a few jars of leaves, “I’ll have tea ready by the time you get back.”

Izuku smiled, the thought of his wife’s green tea putting a little bit more energy into him for his short journey, “I’ll try not to take too long!” He heads for the door before Ochako stops him again.

“Wait!” She says a bit frantically, “Wait Izuku one more thing!”

“W-what?”

“Toilet paper!”

Izuku stares at her blankly, “….Ochako you’re starting to worry me.”

She rubs her face with a half-smile, “Not to eat you dork! We’re almost out of it and I’m pregnant, so get a double bundle!”

He sighs in relief and a bit of embarrassment before turning to the door,  “Okay, okay.”

Ochako shakes her head and adds one last thing before going back to the kitchen, “And don’t forget the coupons!”

Izuku grins, “Alright!”

The cashier looks at Izuku as if he just escaped from an asylum, though considering his selection of items he couldn’t exactly blame him. The look only grew stronger as he went through the list of his purchases.

“…Chunky peanut butter and olives-”

“Yes.”

“-Pickles, wasabi, pizza with mushrooms?”

“…Yes.”

The cashier scratches the base of his horns, trying to piece together why the young man would need all of…this for…the train of thought stopped as soon as he caught sight of the metal band on his customer’s ring finger.

“…First midnight cravings shopping run huh?”

The boy smiles, far too pleased with himself, “Yup.”

He shakes his head as he starts packing the boys groceries, “Congratulations, this is the easy part.” The boy seemed far too pleased with that as well.

Izuku, for his part, only wanted to get back home to his wife, so he can start to figure out how to turn all this into a meal…

[365-money-diary]

DAYS 15-21

DAY FIFTEEN [JAN 15]

8:40 AM - Wake up feeling sore AF. I should’ve stretched after playing, but I obviously didn’t. I also feel like my stomach didn’t eat itself from the inside out while I was sleeping so that’s nice too. Make a chemex and get to work.

10:00 AM - eat plant yogurt.

11:00 AM - eat a few carrots and a clementine.

12:30 PM - make a greek salad for lunch with a La Croix - this is the last of the salad ingredients until Thursday essentially. Shed a singular tear.

3:00 PM - I am a tiny bit hungry. Eat a piece of rye toast.

4:14 PM - I wanted to start working out 45 minutes ago ugh. OK here we go. The hour goes by a lot faster than I expected which is nice. Rinse off and cook an early dinner – Reubens and potatoes.

8:00 PM - I wanted to drink alcohol but I’m too full from dinner to even enjoy it. Heat up chamomile tea instead. I want to work on my blog but K wants to hang instead and I’m in no position to deny the closeness. We play some Mario Kart, watch 30 for 30 about BC and the mob, and turn in early.

DAY FIFTEEN TOTAL: $0

DAY SIXTEEN

8:30 AM - Make chemex and eat a clementine. My sister (S) asked me and my brother (B) to listen to a 20 minute session on the app Mined about codependency. I take a stab at it and get some good notes. 

10:00 AM - Landscaper is going to show up any second so I move my car and pick up dog poop. Text with S more about my cousin’s virtual baby shower tomorrow and go in on some cute stuff from PBKids. Total is $64.05 and she venmos me $32. $32.05

11:15 AM - I actually have a lot of stuff I need to do this weekend though right now I’m too annoyed at my neighbor to focus. Long story short – he has been wanting our dead grapefruit tree for like 6 months and keeps asking if he can cut it down. I said sure. But then he asked our landscaper to do it for him? It’s weird. I mostly don’t care because it’s gone, but the nerve he had to insert himself is wild. $120

12:00 PM - Make Tofu tacos for breakfast and make a to-do list of stuff I want to accomplish today. (post cauliflower leek soup, put away records, barre throw away things my mom has forced me to take out of her house over the years, wipe doors)

6:00 PM - Eat 2 rice cakes. I only manage to get the cauliflower leek soup up, put away the records, and throw away the stuff mom gave me. I think today ended up being a little bit overwhelming emotionally with the landscaper plus the codependency session so I’m kind of burnt. 

7:00 PM - Make pad thai for dinner. Can’t stop snacking on Swedish fish. Drink an old fashioned while K and I watch Night Stalker. Realize part way through that the reason I keep eating Swedish Fish is because something feels off. I fall asleep around 11:30 knowing it’s my blood pressure and that if it doesn’t fix over night I’ll get right to it in the morning.

DAY SIXTEEN TOTAL: $152.35

DAY SEVENTEEN

8:00 AM - Wake up feeling like I’ve been hit by a bus. Ugh. I’ve been struggling with an iron deficiency for a while and have it mostly fixed but I still have occasional days where my blood pressure really gives me issues. 

9:00 AM - Peel myself out of bed and drink some soy sauce. Sounds disgusting but sodium is the only thing that truly helps AND it works fast. Drink a chemex and a boat load of water. Work on posting the cauliflower leek soup

10:00 AM - S calls and I take a walk to chat. I’m still feeling really down from the blood pressure but I know walking will help. It’s actually really nice to get outside. I should do this again later tonight.

11:00 AM - More soy sauce, more water, more coffee. Have a good direction for where I want to go today. Just taking it one task at a time based on how I feel and granting myself the grace.

12:30 PM - Feel good enough to start moving which is great because once I can get over the initial fog with this blood pressure stuff, moving is what keeps me feeling better. Wipe down the doors and then attend a virtual baby shower for my cousin E. 

3:00 PM - Make broccoli fried rice for lunch. I prefer the cauliflower but the store was out of it. I feel like this broccoli stuff would taste great with some kind of cilantro hummus situation but that’ll be for another day I suppose.

3:30 PM - Back to cleaning! The bathrooms are always terrible and today is no exception. It’s always hard to tell if I even make progress because everything is white and the grout is stained orange. Give up after an hour and a half.

6:30 PM - Tag team folding a couple loads of laundry with K while we watch NBA. This week ends bittersweet for my fantasy team. He beat me in one but I’m in first place in the other. Officially 3-1 and 4-0.

8:00 PM - Eat leftover pad thai for dinner.

DAY SEVENTEEN TOTAL: $0

DAY EIGHTEEN

8:30 AM - Wake up feeling like I was hit by a smartcar, so a little better! Today is MLK day and I’m grateful for the extra day off. Make a Chemex, drink some soy sauce, and watch an episode of The Challenge. Pure barre charge comes thru. $15

9:30 AM - Get started on dusting the entire house. It’s been a few weeks since I’ve done this due to lack of Swiffer 360 dusters. It takes forever but honestly our house hasn’t looked this good in years. Swap out the lightbulbs in the bathrooms and the bedroom, shower, and eat a plant yogurt.

11:30 AM - Have a sibling zoom call with S&B I walk while we chat and it’s honestly really nice to get outside. 

1:30 PM - Start shooting my recipe for lasagna rollups. Eat a cup of cauliflower leek soup and a few pretzel rods while I cook. It takes a while but I think they turn out great.

4:00 PM - Eat a lasagna roll and watch an episode of The Challenge. I haven’t worked out in 400 years (read: yesterday and the day before.) and it’s low key killing me, so I suit up and do the thing.

6:00 PM - That was mildly painful. Low cal burn, couldn’t focus to save my life - new moves so lots of pausing during transitions. Oh well. At least I did it.

7:00 PM - Eat two more lasagna rolls for dinner. K and I watch Terrorism Close Calls and I drink a vodka + vanilla seltzer + orange peel.

DAY EIGHTEEN TOTAL: $15

DAY NINETEEN

8:30 AM - It’s appraisal day. Ugh. So excited to get this over with. Make a chemex and open my work stuff. I have a lot to do but have a feeling I won’t be able to concentrate very well until after the appraisal is over. On a nice note - I am feeling leaps and bounds better from yesterday and the day before. 

10:00 AM - Eat a plant yogurt and finish out the rest of my coffee. Meet with my teammates about an outstanding task and then do the random stuff around the house to prep for my appointment.

12:00 PM - Here goes nothing! K and I leave the house with KP and walk her around the block a few times until the appraisal is done. As much as I feel like my anxiety should be gone, it’s not. I think particularly because today is really busy with work. K and I hang out outside on our laptops for a bit to let the house air out before going back inside.

1:00 PM - Eat broccoli fried rice for lunch with a Polar seltzer. Snack on a pretzel rod and some Swedish Fish while it heats.

3:00 PM - Eat the last of the cauliflower leek soup and a few carrots.

5:30 PM - Make a nuun and do a barre live stream. My focus today is so much better but my cal burn is abysmal again. Rinse off and heat up lasagna rolls for dinner. Snack on Swedish Fish while they heat. I really wish I had wine right now because I can feel my body could use the extra help blood pressure-wise but I won’t get my alcohol delivery until Thursday. Sigh.

8:00 PM - Idk whats up but my body is asking for more food so I eat tortilla crumbs and salsa and some dark chocolate. Make vegan ham brine for seitan. Realize I’m out of liquid smoke and buy a 6 pack from Amazon. $15.37

9:30 PM - It’s official, this iron thing is killing me. Ugh. Now I know. I’ll be more conscientious of my supplements, I promise! Finish editing photos of Thousand Island Dressing, watch The Challenge and call it a day.

DAY NINETEEN TOTAL: $15.37

DAY TWENTY

8:30 AM - Still feeling off from iron. This is seriously the worst it’s been in MONTHS. Worst part - it takes 4 weeks for you to produce new blood cells so I can only assume this will happen again since there was a substantial gap in my supplementing.

9:00 AM - Make a chemex, prep the seitan ham dough and bake. I chat with Google support for an account I’m having problems with. The person’s name is Swastika. Feels like a bad omen for inauguration day. Eat 2 clementines and pretzel rod.

12:20 PM - Starving. Decide on Lasagna roll ups for lunch with a Polar. 

2:00 PM - Finish my work for the day. I have on my list of things to do that I want to test this orange spice bread for the blog.

3:00 PM - Spice bread in the oven. Do a round of dishes to prep for tonight’s grocery run. It doesn’t come out great and I eat two slices.

5:15 PM - Do a barre live stream and it goes really well. Super focused, super strong, super sweaty. One more class to go for the challenge this month! Rinse off and continue prepping the kitchen and do the final bake on the ham. 

7:05 PM - Ensue grocery madness. Incoming of onions, bananas, lemons, limes, bell peppers, cucumbers, cheese, cheeze, tortilla chips, tomatoes, dark chocolate, green beans, broccoli, jalapeños, low carb tortillas, bread, oranges, potatoes, cilantro, chickpeas, romaine, celery, clementines, spring mix, frozen burritos, apples, oat milk, tofu, soyrizo, brussels sprouts, eggs, grapes, frozen peas, vegan sour cream, taco seasoning, tomato paste, chipotle peppers in adobo sauce, corn, black beans, avocados, mushrooms, snap peas, pineapple, vegan mayo, carrots, rice noodles, seltzer, beets, cauliflower, parsley, pumpkin seeds, thyme, plant yogurt, garlic, riced broccoli, white rice, gf pretzels, micro arugula, & black olives. $327.69

8:15 PM It takes over an hour, but everything is washed and put away! Make air fried broccoli with miso butter and veggie sandwiches for dinner. 

9:00 PM - Make a crappy drink with flavored vodka. The only thing I have in my house is shooters left over from my sister’s bachelorette party. She’s now divorced if that gives you any idea of how long this stuff has been sitting around. More alcohol comes tomorrow at least! Eat a few Swedish fish.

9:30 PM - Play Mario Kart, watch The Challenge, and call it a night.

DAY TWENTY TOTAL: $327.69

DAY TWENTY-ONE

8:30 AM - Chemex and work. Alcohol is coming sometime this AM from my friend J who has a wholesale hookup. Much like everything else in the pandemic, I just buy in bulk. It’s easier that way!

10:30 AM - Eat a slice of orange spice bread for breakfast. It’s definitely growing on me but I think I need to adjust a few things before shooting/posting. J drops off my booze order. I got 2 crates of wine (24 bottles total), a bottle of bourbon, rye, mezcal, rum, and st. germaine. She says it was $400 but I pay her more. $450

11:00 AM - Start prepping chile de arbol salsa & stuff for this week’s salad - spring mix, roasted tofu with taco seasoning, avo, chipotle ranch dressing, cilantro, green onion, black beans, tomatoes and corn. YUM. Eat salad with a La Croix. 

3:00 PM - I get the appraisal back! My house came in at $390k. (I bought it for $245k) OMG! Eat a celebratory slice of orange bread.

6:45 PM - Finish class 15/15 for the barre challenge. 11 more months to go. hah! Rinse off, roast potatoes for veggie sandwiches. Pour a celebratory glass of wine. 

8:30 PM - Pour another half glass. What a week! End up going on a walk with K & KP which was really nice. I need to get out more. This weekend I will. Stay tuned. ~*~*~

DAY TWENTY-ONE TOTAL: $450

[veronicasflow]

APPLY THE LAW OF FLOW

We are changing as a collective, and you are changing as an individual.

The collective chaos that we are experiencing is a reflection of the chaos within you. You may be thinking “Wait, what do you mean by that? I don’t have such chaos in my life. My life is not as chaotic as this collective situation.” 

Isn’t it though? The virus, the revolution, the politics, the economy and the lockdown, are a collective chaos. Now let’s bring this down to your own personal life. What’s happening in your job situation? What’s happening in your personal relationships, your close relationships, your relationships with co-workers, friends, neighbors? Do you get along or just cross paths with them sometimes? The lessons are not in avoiding the bad situations at work,or with each other, but interacting and learning/teaching from one other. Am I running away from my lessons within relationships or am I staying around those challenges until there is no longer growth or lessons within it?

In the last decade, self help strategies have been helping us to see that we need to let go of what is no longer serving us. But we need to learn the lesson first… before we let go. We need to make sure we understood the reasons within the lessons, in order to evolve from them. 

The other part of the personal reflection, is around the most important one “The relationship with ourself.” We expect others to do, or act in certain ways to be able to be around us, to be part of our group, tribe, or just our life. However, do we have the same expectations when it comes to what we do for ourself? Do we go and buy flowers, or chocolates for ourself, because it’s a special day, or we succeeded in a project? Do we take the time every week, to take a long shower or bath with bubbles, maybe self massage with some special oils? Or, do we give ourself that thing we wanted for so long, because it will cheer us up? We do these things for others.  When they succeed or when they performed something special, we reward, we give and we show our appreciation. So, do we do the same for and to ourselves? If your answer is yes? Then 100% love and applause to you.  If your answer is “kinda.” Good for you for trying to give yourself the space and importance to receive from yourself. If your answer was, damn it, “I don’t give myself nothing at all.” I think about everybody’s priorities before mine. You are not alone. Here is your time to learn those lessons.  Let’s compare the time you give yourself, verses the time you give to others. 

The world has not changed if you ask me. The morning and night comes every 12 hours. Earth keeps spinning.  The rivers flow. The oceans still have the same currents going. Nature’s patterns are still flowing, and so is our life. What is happening is an opportunity to revisit the narrative we are creating in our life. Chaos is whatever you want to make it. The revolving energies around us are whatever we want to make them. 

Not long ago, I had a very interesting question. It was more like a statement from one of my followers on instagram. He said, that my happiness was not real. He stressed that I was “pretending” to have all that positivity. He feels it is impossible from someone to live is a half full state all the time. And that he hates people that are always positive. 

My answer to his questions/statement/letting go of his own frustration comment, was simple. He wants to connect to the positivity and possibilities that people like me share on Instagram or Social media. That is his goal, that is his dream. HE wants to change his narrative, his story line, the way he has design his life. It’s just hard and instead, it’s easier to send me and some of the people he follows a message letting us know, how hard is it for him to connect to that. It wasn’t always rainbows and unicorns for me. I not always was positive and still not. I have hormonal days where body chemistry is stronger than my mental capacity to keep myself aligned and balanced. “ TOO POSITIVE PEOPLE” I guess I’m flattered by the fact that today someone is able to see me, like a positive person, when not long ago I was always half empty. The state of mine changes it all. How we perceive this situation will change your whole life when this is all over and we go back to the NEW NORMAL. 

What’s the new normal? What do you want to make it? Do you LOVE your job? Or you are just passing by to get a paycheck every two weeks or a month. Do you LOVE where you live? Or are you just there because… So many questions, you should be thinking and trying to answer right now and not worry about being locked down, or feeling fear, worry, stress, anger, anxiety. So again, let me ask you: What is the reality you want to live and you would like to live in? The Law of Attraction works by creating a visual and verbal  narrative around the life you would LOVE to have. Then, DO IT? Maybe? (Passive aggressively) or JUST DO IT the nike way. You have created this, as a soul and as a soul collective, because you know you must change, we all do. We ALL NEED THIS CHANGE, as an individual and as a collective. You can go through your Facebook cleaning those friends that no longer are adding up to your story, make  sure you have them all, and start your NEW JOURNEY with those that resonate and vibrate with you. Those that brings the best of you, those that you help to bring the best of them.

 Right now, some of you are experiencing your own reality, and some of you are experiencing the reality created by the collective, and some of you are experiencing both of these together. This is also how things will unfold: some of you living in one dimension, some of you continuing in the dimension created by the collective, and some of you existing in both dimensions at the same time. Ok, what? What mushroom did you take Veronica? Let me explain. Don’t you have that friend, that posts on Facebook and you think… In what reality do you live? We definitely live in different universes. Well, I think it’s now easier for you to undertsand, that parallel realities may be a possibility. And that he/she live in another one different than yours. His/her reality is different in every single way, and it seems like you guys are no longer clicking anymore. Different paths, different views, journeys whatever you want to call it. 

But wait Veronica… We are in the same reality, I can touch her/him, she/he can touch me, that means we are both here in the same reality. Yeah, sure… but think about it in an energetic level. You no longer are in the same energy level that your “friend” . Example, you always get the promotion, or your boss always pays more attention to what you have to say, or maybe he/she is the one getting all the attention. So the person who is getting things done, getting the attention from the boss is definitely in a vibration of creation-connection and is higher than the other person that for some reason can not connect to it… Why is that, The same thing we are talking about, it just take the intention of changing, shifting your narrative and reality and making it whatever you want to make it. Level up your vibe.

Well, let’s bring that into a more basic concept. Again, going back to what we just visit around the reality you want to live in. The collective being, the one feeding you fear, creating more uncertainty and anxiety for your future. Or the one dimension, where you are able to see possibilities within your situation. The dimension where obstacles are just situations to solve and not to fear. A dimension where you are able to connect to possibilities, those possibilities that comes from being free in a mind-body & soul level (You don’t need to be yogi for this). We all are in a similar situation, some of us completely lost our job/path/carrier or whatever that means for you. Then let me enlighten you, you can change your job completely, start over again, reinvent yourself and create a new self that you LOVE to be with.  

It is difficult to realize you have created this chaos, isn’t it? And yet this is so. You create your reality, collective soul creates collective reality and depending on where you are in your understanding, you experience one or the other of these or both. 

 As you and we become more aware, your life become more clear. This is why you can see clearly that all of the things you believed would make you happy, like: social media, general distractions, addictions, busyness, over consumption, over-entertainment and more…   All these things now show themselves as false comforts, disconnectors, things that are no longer making your reality REAL. In the past, you turned to these patterns over and over again, to escape, to find disconnection, little did you know, that you just needed it or you just wanted to disconnect from the reality you were creating. You were trying so hard to connect to other peoples reality to find a way to change yours. And yet you easily see now that none of those distractions can provide you with the sustained feeling of connection to YOURSELF, to peace and joy that you truly seek. None of them, not one, has ever provided you with the sense of meaning that you truly desire. But hey, now you can. You just need to sit down and have a serious conversation with yourself, STOP B-ting yourself and be truthful, real, raw. That will show you your real NORTH.

 You know this now, and you also know why. It is impossible to manifest higher gifts from lower sources or vibrations. Like attracts like. What is creates what is. At last, you are understanding this, not in an intellectual way, but as a knowing(you kinda know, the info was within you and you just reconnected to it). It has taken some time for you to become aware at this level. Many of you still don’t understand, and this is why the collective struggles. But we can do it, you are reading or hearing this because you are part of the solution, you are part of the change, you are becoming and reconnecting to your highest self.

 You Can Move Forward

Your soul knows what is true. Your soul continues to lead you to LOVE, peace, joy and deeper meaning that you came into this lifetime to experience. Your soul continues to observe you knocking, knocking and knocking a little more at all the wrong doors. Your soul is patient, and your soul continues invite you to live in an easier and more delightful way. By soul, we mean your soul and your soul and your soul, and we also mean the Collective Soul that is all consciousness and is One/All/God/Divine/Source. 

 Your BODY-MIND-SOUL knows that you cannot walk your dream path is you have one foot on one path and the other foot on another. You MUST be certain, in order for movement to happen. It’s simple physics, moving in one direction and creating movement in the opposite direction at that same time results in not moving, movement cancells. If we bring this concept to our life, you have come to a complete stop. You have become stuck. Your desire or are call to go in one direction that is mindless, is what has been told to you to do, t’s what’s normal and your desire, your dream is to go in another direction that is whole and mindful, but crazy, not accepted by those around you. Our Collective Soul in the human realm has reached an impasse, a point of no return, and now you are stopped and stuck until you decide which way you will go. STUCK or FLOW. Dark or Light. Pain or Joy. Chaos or Meaning. Destruction or Creation. You understand this. Weigh your options, be open to change, to flow in new waters, waters that even knowing are unknown to you, feel like the option you should of taken long time ago. Options that will get you closer to live a meaningful happy life. Be open to dream a new dream, walk a new path, YOUR PATH and not anybody else’s.

 We have been stopped so that we may once again see clearly as a collective. Again, let’s go to questions. Where do you want to go? Which direction do you want to take? How do you want to live? You are being given this short time, this blink of an eye in all your lifetimes on this earth to decide your reality. 

  This is an invitation to dream a new dream. To create or re-create your own narrative. Even now, as you place your attention on your Highest Potentiality for this lifetime, which is most certainly not how you have been thinking and not how you have been living, you see that there are new possibilities you have never considered. So consider this - You have stopped yourself so you can see, so you can open your eyes to the priceless time you have, to be you in this lifetime - We only have THIS MOMENT once.

 Nothing is as it Seems - What do you mean by that? The news, the rumor, the influence all of this is false. Mmm not really, there is a problem in the world, there is people dying, there is a huge problem with people not having a job. Yes all that is part of the reality, but who’s reality? what is real is your reality, and your reality does not unfold in a news stream, in social media, in politics. What is real is how you experience one moment, then the next. Check your Nowness now, be present, sense your reality. Are you breathing? Take a deep breath now. Are you alive? Of course you are. Is there any joy within you? There absolutely is so. This is what is true. This is the reality and dimension that you have created. Enjoy it, and if you are in a dimension or reality that you dislike, here is your opportunity to shift it, to re-connect to a reality that you LOVE.

 What is valuable to you now is the support of two things: 

First, the gifts of Mother Earth, panache mama, Gaia, which will instantly ground you, welcome you, calm and soothe you. One leaf, one breath of wind, one river flowing, one soaring bird, all this is healing. And so I invite you to connect to earth, to the elements, to seek peace with the mother, Gaia, panache mama, our home, the only one we have.  

 Second is with your own soul, Connect with god, angels, Jesus, Buda or whatever you wish and believe you need to reconnect to in meditation, in prayer, in dreaming, and begin to see that what is possible is so much more than what you have imagined. Connect to faith, believe, hope vibrations that will reconnect you to the energy of LOVE. Begin to see that your new dream is being dreamt even now, and the more you dream how you would like things to be: beautiful, loving, natural, enjoyable, meaningful. This is what you are creating for your own reality, and this is what you are creating together for the collective. 

 Change is HERE, change is within you, change is NOW.

Much love, 

[ebenpink]

13 Keto-Friendly Fiber Foods http://bit.ly/2GiFxTG

While some keto or low-carb proponents claim fiber is useless at best and actively harmful at worst, I come down on the side that says fiber is probably helpful for most people. Some folks have persistently better responses to low- or no-fiber keto diets, and I won’t argue with that—I’ve seen it happen and I’ve read the studies where de-emphasizing fiber can actually improve constipation, for example.

I’ll just say that I have an opposite reaction, and, most importantly, I love eating a variety of plant foods that also happen to contain a ton of great nutrients in addition to fiber.

Do I buy into the idea that fiber is important because it is every human being’s responsibility to produce as much colonic bulk as humanly possible? No.

Do I think we should be consistently pushing the limits of our digestive tracts, performing feats of bathroom heroism so momentous they border on Herculean, and making sure the toilet bowl buckles beneath us? No.

The real value of fiber lies not in its coarseness, its tendency to form colonic bulk, to keep us topped off. The true value lies in its fermentability. A fermentable fiber is a prebiotic fiber—fiber that feeds our gut bacteria.

I won’t get into the many roles our gut bacteria play in our health today (I’ve covered that before. 1, 2, 3).

I will, however, explain why we need to be feeding our gut bacteria. Our gut bacteria form a physical barrier against incursions and colonization by pathogenic bacteria; they take up room along the gut lining so pathogens can’t. If we don’t feed our gut bacteria with prebiotics, it won’t be around to protect us. After antibiotic treatment where both good and bad gut flora are indiscriminately targeted and wiped out, pathogenic obesity-promoting bacteria take advantage of the open space. That’s a worst-case scenario, but it shows what can happen when the harmony of the gut is disturbed by antibiotics or, to a less extent, a lack of fermentable prebiotic fibers.

When our gut bacteria eat prebiotics, they also give off metabolites like butyric acid—a short chain fatty acid that our colonic cells use as an energy source and which improves metabolic health.

Gut bacteria also convert antinutrients like phytic acid into nutrients like inositol. The almond meal-obsessed keto eater would do well to have a powerful gut biome set up to convert all that phytic acid to inositol.

Now, some writers will come up with specific blends of fibers, powders and gums to create the “optimal” prebiotic diet for your gut bacteria, but that’s pretty silly. The gut is a complicated place. We’ve barely begun to even identify all its inhabitants. To think we know the precise blend of isolated fiber that will make them flourish, and then act on that, is a mistake.

A better option is to eat foods that contain fiber. Some of the prebiotic fibrous foods with the best nutrient profiles also happen to be extremely keto-friendly.

1) Almonds and Pistachios

Nuts are usually favored in health-conscious circles for a few reasons. They like the monounsaturated fat. They like the mineral profile, or the complete protein, or their ability to dissemble into nut meals and form baked goods. But what gets short shrift is the fiber content. Now, I can’t speak for other nuts, but almonds and pistachios in particular contain fiber with potent prebiotic effects. People who eat almonds and to an even greater extent pistachios end up with improved gut bacteria profiles.

2) Green Bananas

Ripe bananas are difficult to squeeze into a ketogenic diet. The green banana—an unripe one—is mostly resistant starch, a type of starch that cannot be digested and travels untouched until colonic bacteria metabolize it. It’s one of the best stimulators we know of butyric acid production. And sure, you could do a spoonful of raw potato starch to get your resistant starch, but the beauty of the green banana is that it also provides potassium, another nutrient that some find difficult to obtain and stay keto.

3) Wild Blueberries

Blackberries, boysenberries, raspberries, and strawberries are all loaded with fiber, and you should eat them. They’re lower carb than you think, they’re loaded with polyphenols, and topped with some real whipped cream they make a fantastic dessert. But wild blueberries are special. They’re smaller than other berries, which increases the amount of skin per ounce you get, and skin is where all the polyphenols and fiber lie. Heck, even the blueberry’s polyphenols have prebiotic effects on the gut biome.

4) Mushrooms

A few years ago, I wrote a whole post on mushrooms. Suffice it to say, they’re quite wonderful, bordering on magical. I did not discuss the fiber they contain. It turns out that all the various mushroom polysaccharides/fibers, including beta-glucans, mannans, chitin, xylans, and galactans also act as potent prebiotics that improve the health of the host.

5) Avocado

Your standard avocado has about 12-15 grams of fiber, if you eat the whole thing. I

6) Jicama

Great with chili powder, salt, and lime juice, jicama is about 11 grams of carbs per cup, but half of those are inulin, a potent prebiotic fiber with a tendency to really ramp up butyrate production.

7) Onions

Onions are another fantastic source of inulin. They go into almost every dish of every cuisine, so there’s no excuse not to be eating onions.

8) Garlic

I’ve been known to treat garlic like a vegetable, roasting an entire cast iron pan full until brown and sweet and chewy. They’re another great source of prebiotic fiber.

9) Leeks

Leeks have more inulin than onions. Try them crispy in egg scrambles.

10) Broccoli

Broccolini is a major part of my favorite meal of the day—my Big-Ass Keto Salad. Broccoli (and cruciferous vegetables in general) has been shown to have modulatory effects on the gut biome.

11) Sauerkraut

Kraut gives you two in one. It’s a fermented food, which is great for the gut biome. And it’s cabbage, which is very fibrous. Even pasteurized kraut improves gut health.

12) Dark Chocolate

Dark chocolate, the good stuff with a high cacao content (85%+) and low sugar content, is an incredible source of prebiotic fiber. Eat more of it.

13) Animal Fiber

Obligate carnivores like cheetahs who don’t eat any plants (willingly) still have gut bacteria. These gut bacteria thrive on “animal fiber,” the gristle and cartilage and other bits of connective tissue that comprise a good 20-30% of the walking weight of a prey animal. Humans are not obligate carnivores, but eating the entire animal has been a mainstay of advanced hominid existence for millions of years. I find it very likely that something, someone, somewhere inside our guts is breaking down the animal fiber we eat—so you’d better be eating some!

Not so tough, is it? It’s not like I’m suggesting you load up on bran muffins, psyllium smoothies. I don’t want you dumping flax meal into everything or munching on those awful fiber gummies. Just eat some basic, healthy, low-carb plant matter—foods that don’t really scream “fiber”—and the rest will take care of itself.

What’s your favorite low-carb source of fiber? Let me know down below.

Thanks for reading, everyone.

//

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References: 

Hernández E, Bargiela R, Diez MS, et al. Functional consequences of microbial shifts in the human gastrointestinal tract linked to antibiotic treatment and obesity. Gut Microbes. 2013;4(4):306-15.

Ukhanova M, Wang X, Baer DJ, Novotny JA, Fredborg M, Mai V. Effects of almond and pistachio consumption on gut microbiota composition in a randomised cross-over human feeding study. Br J Nutr. 2014;111(12):2146-52.

Jiao X, Wang Y, Lin Y, et al. Blueberry polyphenols extract as a potential prebiotic with anti-obesity effects on C57BL/6 J mice by modulating the gut microbiota. J Nutr Biochem. 2019;64:88-100.

Jayachandran M, Xiao J, Xu B. A Critical Review on Health Promoting Benefits of Edible Mushrooms through Gut Microbiota. Int J Mol Sci. 2017;18(9)

Nielsen ES, Garnås E, Jensen KJ, et al. Lacto-fermented sauerkraut improves symptoms in IBS patients independent of product pasteurisation – a pilot study. Food Funct. 2018;9(10):5323-5335.

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[ladystylestores]

7 Day Healthy Meal Plan (July 13-19)

posted July 11, 2020 by Gina

A free 7-day, flexible weight loss meal plan including breakfast, lunch and dinner and a shopping list. All recipes include calories and updated WW Smart Points.

7-Day Healthy Meal Plan

I love reading comments on my meal plans like this one from last week “I am down 5lb since starting your plans the other week.” If you’re using them and have success stories, leave a comment, it will make my day! With summer now in full swing and the temperatures rising, I love to relax in the evening at home with a cool and fruity summer “adult” beverage. Check out my Boozy Watermelon Lime Granita, Citrus Margarita Spritzer, Basil-Cucumber Gin Cooler and don’t forget about an alcohol free Nojito!

Why Should Everyone Meal Plan?

Meal planning is a great way to organize your meals for the week ahead. You also save time and money in the supermarket! And of course, planning ahead helps you stick to your goals!

About The Meal Plan

If you’re new to my meal plans, I’ve been sharing these free, 7-day flexible healthy meal plans (you can see my previous meal plans here) that are meant as a guide, with plenty of wiggle room for you to add more food, coffee, beverages, fruits, snacks, dessert, wine, etc or swap recipes out for meals you prefer, you can search for recipes by course in the index. You should aim for around 1500 calories* per day.

There’s also a precise, organized grocery list that will make grocery shopping so much easier and much less stressful. Save you money and time. You’ll dine out less often, waste less food and you’ll have everything you need on hand to help keep you on track.

Lastly, if you’re on Facebook join my Skinnytaste Facebook Community where everyone’s sharing photos of recipes they are making, you can join here. I’m loving all the ideas everyone’s sharing! If you wish to get on the email list, you can subscribe here so you never miss a meal plan!

Also, if you don’t have the Skinnytaste Meal Planner, now would be a great time to get one to get organized for 2020! There was a print error last year, but it’s perfect now! You can order it here!

THE DETAILS:

Breakfast and lunch Monday-Friday, are designed to serve 1 while dinners and all meals on Saturday and Sunday are designed to serve a family of 4. Some recipes make enough leftovers for two nights or lunch the next day. While we truly believe there is no one size fits all meal plan, we did our best to come up with something that appeals to a wide range of individuals. Everything is Weight Watchers friendly, I included the updated WW Blue SP for your convenience, feel free to swap out any recipes you wish or just use this for inspiration!

The grocery list is comprehensive and includes everything you need to make all meals on the plan. I’ve even included brand recommendations of products I love and use often. Cross check your cabinets because many condiments you’ll notice I use often, so you may already have a lot of them.

And last, but certainly not least, this meal plan is flexible and realistic. There’s plenty of wiggle room for cocktails, healthy snacks, dessert and dinner out. And if necessary, you can move some things around to make it work with your schedule. Please let me know if you’re using these plans, this will help me decide if I should continue sharing them!

MONDAY (7/13) B: Overnight Oats in a Jar (5B 5G 3P) L: 2 cups Southwestern Black Bean, Quinoa and Mango Salad (6B 11G 2P) D: The Best Grilled Portobello Mushroom Burger (6B 6G 6P) with Air Fryer French Fries (5B 5G 1P) (recipe x 4)

Totals: WW Points 22B 27G 12P, Calories 1,035*

TUESDAY (7/14) B: BLT Egg Sandwich (6B 8G 6P) L: 2 cups Southwestern Black Bean, Quinoa and Mango Salad (6B 11G 2P) D: Barbacoa Beef (3B 3G 3P) with 2 corn tortillas (3B 3G 3P), ¼ cup each: Pico de Gallo and shredded lettuce (0B 0G 0P) with Quick and Delicioso Cuban Style Black Beans (1B 3G 1P)

Totals: WW Points 19B 28G 15P, Calories 1,014*

WEDNESDAY (7/15) B: Overnight Oats in a Jar (5B 5G 3P) L: 2 cups Southwestern Black Bean, Quinoa and Mango Salad (6B 11G 2P) D: LEFTOVER Barbacoa Beef (3B 3G 3P) over 1 cup brown rice (6B 6G 0P), Corn Salsa with Lime (0B 2G 0P) and 1 ounce avocado (1B 1G 1P)

Totals: WW Points 21B 28G 9P, Calories 1,037*

THURSDAY (7/16) B: BLT Egg Sandwich (6B 8G 6P) L: Spiralized Greek Cucumber Salad with Lemon and Feta (7B 7G 7P) D: Gnocchi with Grilled Chicken in Roasted Red Pepper Sauce (8B 10G 8P) Totals: WW Points 21B 25G 21P, Calories 890*

FRIDAY (7/17) B: PB + J Smoothie (9B 9G 9P) L: LEFTOVER Gnocchi with Grilled Chicken in Roasted Red Pepper Sauce (8B 10G 8P) D: Basil-Parmesan Crusted Salmon** (3B 6G 3P) with 2 cups baby arugula, 6 halved cherry tomatoes and 2 teaspoons light vinaigrette (1B 1G 1P)

Totals: WW Points 21B 26G 21P, Calories 923*

SATURDAY (7/18) B: Chocolate Chip Zucchini Bread (5B 5G 5P) with a banana (0B 0G 0P) L: Salmon Avocado Salad (5B 8G 5P) D: ORDER IN!

Totals: WW Points 10B 12G 10P, Calories 507*

SUNDAY (7/19) B: LEFTOVER Chocolate Chip Zucchini Bread (5B 5G 5P) with a plum (0B 0G 0P) L: Open-Faced Tuna Melt Sandwich (4B 5G 4P) (recipe x 2) with an apple (0B 0G 0P) D: Grilled Cumin Spiced Pork Tenderloin (3B 3G 2P) with Corn Tomato Avocado Salad (3B 4G 3P)

Totals: WW Points 15B 17G 14P, Calories 868*

*This is just a guide, women should aim for around 1500 calories per day. Here’s a helpful calculator to estimate your calorie needs. I’ve left plenty of wiggle room for you to add more food such as coffee, beverages, fruits, snacks, dessert, wine, etc.

**Make 4 extra salmon fillets (1 pound) for salad Saturday.

*Google doc

Print Shopping List

Shopping List

Produce

5 medium bananas

4 medium plums

4 medium apples

1 large mango

1 (6-ounce) container fresh blueberries

1 (12-ounce) container fresh strawberries

3 medium lemons

2 medium limes

2 small jalapenos

4 portobello mushroom caps

2 small red bell pepper

1 small green bell pepper (can sub red bell pepper in Greek Cucumber Salad, if desired)

3 small Persian cucumbers

1 small English cucumber (can buy large and sub for Persian cucumbers in Corn Salad, if desired)

1 large zucchini

1 small bunch celery

1 large carrot

1 ½ pounds (4 medium) Yukon Gold or Russet potatoes

4 large ears of corn

1 medium shallot

1 large head garlic

2 small (5-ounce), 1 medium (6-ounce) and 1 large (7-ounce) Hass avocados

1 small bunch scallions

1 (10-ounce) bag/clamshell baby arugula

1 (5-ounce) bag/clamshell baby spinach

1 large head Romaine lettuce

½ small head red cabbage

1 large bunch fresh cilantro

1 small bunch/container fresh rosemary (can sub 1 teaspoon dry rosemary in Portobello Burgers, if desired)

1 small bunch/container fresh basil

1 small bunch/container fresh oregano (can sub ½ teaspoon basil in Greek Cucumber Salad, if desired)

1 dry pint plus 1 pound cherry or grape tomatoes

2 small and 3 medium vine-ripened tomatoes

1 small and 1 medium red onion

1 medium yellow onion

Meat, Poultry and Fish

1 package center-cut bacon

3 pounds beef eye of round or bottom round roast

1 ¼ pound boneless, skinless chicken breasts

2 ¼ pounds wild salmon fillets

1 (18-ounce) pork tenderloin

Grains*

1 small package quick oats

1 small package dry red or tri-color quinoa (or 1 cup pre-cooked)

1 package low-calorie whole wheat buns (I like Martin’s)

1 small loaf sliced whole grain bread

1 package corn tortillas

1 small package dry brown rice (or 4 cups pre-cooked)

1 package DeLallo Potato Cheese Italian Gnocchi Kit (can sub plain gnocchi if you can’t find kit)

1 small package unbleached all-purpose flour

1 small package white whole wheat flour

Condiments and Spices

Extra virgin olive oil

Canola oil

Cooking spray

Olive oil spray (or get a Misto oil mister)

Kosher salt (I like Diamond Crystal)

Pepper grinder (or fresh peppercorns)

NuNaturals liquid vanilla stevia (or sweetener of your choice)

Cinnamon

Cumin

Chili powder

Turmeric

Balsamic vinegar

Reduced sodium soy sauce*

Steak seasoning (such as Montreal Steak Grill Mates)

Garlic powder

Regular or light mayonnaise

Oregano

Ground cloves

Bay leaves

Red wine vinegar

Light vinaigrette dressing (or make your own with ingredients in list)

Vanilla extract

Dijon mustard

Dried parsley

Apple cider vinegar

Paprika

Dairy & Misc. Refrigerated Items

½ dozen large eggs

1 small container fresh Pico de Gallo (or ingredients to make your own)

1 small chunk feta cheese

1 small wedge fresh Parmesan or Pecorino Romano cheese

1 package sliced reduced fat Swiss cheese (I like Alpine Lace)

1 package sliced reduced fat cheddar cheese

1 small box butter

1 pint half and half

1 pint unsweetened vanilla almond milk (can sub skim or soy in Overnight Oats and PB + J Smoothie, if desired)

Frozen

1 small package blueberries

Canned and Jarred

1 small jar unsweetened apple sauce

2 (4.5-ounce) cans tuna in water

1 (15-ounce) can black beans

1 (15-ounce) can no salt added black beans

1 small jar pitted Kalamata olives

2 (12-ounce) jars roasted red peppers in water

1 (15-ounce) can chicken or vegetable broth

1 small jar peanut butter

1 small can/jar chipotle peppers in adobo

Misc. Dry Goods

1 small package chia seeds

1 small package brown sugar

Baking soda

1 small package chopped pecans

1 small package chocolate chips

*You can buy gluten free, if desired

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posted July 11, 2020 by Gina

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from World Wide News https://ift.tt/326jIlq

[veronicamayor]

APPLY THE LAW OF FLOW

We are changing as a collective, and you are changing as an individual.

The collective chaos that we are experiencing is a reflection of the chaos within you. You may be thinking “Wait, what do you mean by that? I don’t have such chaos in my life. My life is not as chaotic as this collective situation.” 

Isn’t it though? The virus, the politics, the economy and the lockdown, are a collective chaos. Now let’s bring this down to your own personal life. What’s happening in your job situation? What’s happening in your personal relationships, your close relationships, your relationships with co-workers, friends, neighbors? Do you get along or just cross paths with them sometimes? The lessons are not in avoiding the bad situations at work,or with each other, but interacting and learning/teaching from one other. Am I running away from my lessons within relationships or am I staying around those challenges until there is no longer growth or lessons within it?

In the last decade, self help strategies have been helping us to see that we need to let go of what is no longer serving us. But we need to learn the lesson first… before we let go. We need to make sure we understood the reasons within the lessons, in order to evolve from them. 

The other part of the personal reflection, is around the most important one “The relationship with ourself.” We expect others to do, or act in certain ways to be able to be around us, to be part of our group, tribe, or just our life. However, do we have the same expectations when it comes to what we do for ourself? Do we go and buy flowers, or chocolates for ourself, because it’s a special day, or we succeeded in a project? Do we take the time every week, to take a long shower or bath with bubbles, maybe self massage with some special oils? Or, do we give ourself that thing we wanted for so long, because it will cheer us up? We do these things for others.  When they succeed or when they performed something special, we reward, we give and we show our appreciation. So, do we do the same for and to ourselves? If your answer is yes? Then 100% love and applause to you.  If your answer is “kinda.” Good for you for trying to give yourself the space and importance to receive from yourself. If your answer was, damn it, “I don’t give myself nothing at all.” I think about everybody’s priorities before mine. You are not alone. Here is your time to learn those lessons.  Let’s compare the time you give yourself, verses the time you give to others. 

The world has not changed if you ask me. The morning and night comes every 12 hours. Earth keeps spinning.  The rivers flow. The oceans still have the same currents going. Nature’s patterns are still flowing, and so is our life. What is happening is an opportunity to revisit the narrative we are creating in our life. Chaos is whatever you want to make it. The revolving energies around us are whatever we want to make them. 

Not long ago, I had a very interesting question. It was more like a statement from one of my followers on instagram. He said, that my happiness was not real. He stressed that I was “pretending” to have all that positivity. He feels it is impossible from someone to live is a half full state all the time. And that he hates people that are always positive. 

My answer to his questions/statement/letting go of his own frustration comment, was simple. He wants to connect to the positivity and possibilities that people like me share on Instagram or Social media. That is his goal, that is his dream. HE wants to change his narrative, his story line, the way he has design his life. It’s just hard and instead, it’s easier to send me and some of the people he follows a message letting us know, how hard is it for him to connect to that. It wasn’t always rainbows and unicorns for me. I not always was positive and still not. I have hormonal days where body chemistry is stronger than my mental capacity to keep myself aligned and balanced. “ TOO POSITIVE PEOPLE” I guess I’m flattered by the fact that today someone is able to see me, like a positive person, when not long ago I was always half empty. The state of mine changes it all. How we perceive this situation will change your whole life when this is all over and we go back to the NEW NORMAL. 

What’s the new normal? What do you want to make it? Do you LOVE your job? Or you are just passing by to get a paycheck every two weeks or a month. Do you LOVE where you live? Or are you just there because… So many questions, you should be thinking and trying to answer right now and not worry about being locked down, or feeling fear, worry, stress, anger, anxiety. So again, let me ask you: What is the reality you want to live and you would like to live in? The Law of Attraction works by creating a visual and verbal  narrative around the life you would LOVE to have. Then, DO IT? Maybe? (Passive aggressively) or JUST DO IT the nike way. You have created this, as a soul and as a soul collective, because you know you must change, we all do. We ALL NEED THIS CHANGE, as an individual and as a collective. You can go through your Facebook cleaning those friends that no longer are adding up to your story, make  sure you have them all, and start your NEW JOURNEY with those that resonate and vibrate with you. Those that brings the best of you, those that you help to bring the best of them.

 Right now, some of you are experiencing your own reality, and some of you are experiencing the reality created by the collective, and some of you are experiencing both of these together. This is also how things will unfold: some of you living in one dimension, some of you continuing in the dimension created by the collective, and some of you existing in both dimensions at the same time. Ok, what? What mushroom did you take Veronica? Let me explain. Don’t you have that friend, that posts on Facebook and you think… In what reality do you live? We definitely live in different universes. Well, I think it’s now easier for you to undertsand, that parallel realities may be a possibility. And that he/she live in another one different than yours. His/her reality is different in every single way, and it seems like you guys are no longer clicking anymore. Different paths, different views, journeys whatever you want to call it. 

But wait Veronica… We are in the same reality, I can touch her/him, she/he can touch me, that means we are both here in the same reality. Yeah, sure… but think about it in an energetic level. You no longer are in the same energy level that your “friend” . Example, you always get the promotion, or your boss always pays more attention to what you have to say, or maybe he/she is the one getting all the attention. So the person who is getting things done, getting the attention from the boss is definitely in a vibration of creation-connection and is higher than the other person that for some reason can not connect to it… Why is that, The same thing we are talking about, it just take the intention of changing, shifting your narrative and reality and making it whatever you want to make it. Level up your vibe.

Well, let’s bring that into a more basic concept. Again, going back to what we just visit around the reality you want to live in. The collective being, the one feeding you fear, creating more uncertainty and anxiety for your future. Or the one dimension, where you are able to see possibilities within your situation. The dimension where obstacles are just situations to solve and not to fear. A dimension where you are able to connect to possibilities, those possibilities that comes from being free in a mind-body & soul level (You don’t need to be yogi for this). We all are in a similar situation, some of us completely lost our job/path/carrier or whatever that means for you. Then let me enlighten you, you can change your job completely, start over again, reinvent yourself and create a new self that you LOVE to be with.  

It is difficult to realize you have created this chaos, isn’t it? And yet this is so. You create your reality, collective soul creates collective reality and depending on where you are in your understanding, you experience one or the other of these or both. 

 As you and we become more aware, your life become more clear. This is why you can see clearly that all of the things you believed would make you happy, like: social media, general distractions, addictions, busyness, over consumption, over-entertainment and more…   All these things now show themselves as false comforts, disconnectors, things that are no longer making your reality REAL. In the past, you turned to these patterns over and over again, to escape, to find disconnection, little did you know, that you just needed it or you just wanted to disconnect from the reality you were creating. You were trying so hard to connect to other peoples reality to find a way to change yours. And yet you easily see now that none of those distractions can provide you with the sustained feeling of connection to YOURSELF, to peace and joy that you truly seek. None of them, not one, has ever provided you with the sense of meaning that you truly desire. But hey, now you can. You just need to sit down and have a serious conversation with yourself, STOP B-ting yourself and be truthful, real, raw. That will show you your real NORTH.

 You know this now, and you also know why. It is impossible to manifest higher gifts from lower sources or vibrations. Like attracts like. What is creates what is. At last, you are understanding this, not in an intellectual way, but as a knowing(you kinda know, the info was within you and you just reconnected to it). It has taken some time for you to become aware at this level. Many of you still don’t understand, and this is why the collective struggles. But we can do it, you are reading or hearing this because you are part of the solution, you are part of the change, you are becoming and reconnecting to your highest self.

 You Can Move Forward

Your soul knows what is true. Your soul continues to lead you to LOVE, peace, joy and deeper meaning that you came into this lifetime to experience. Your soul continues to observe you knocking, knocking and knocking a little more at all the wrong doors. Your soul is patient, and your soul continues invite you to live in an easier and more delightful way. By soul, we mean your soul and your soul and your soul, and we also mean the Collective Soul that is all consciousness and is One/All/God/Divine/Source. 

 Your BODY-MIND-SOUL knows that you cannot walk your dream path is you have one foot on one path and the other foot on another. You MUST be certain, in order for movement to happen. It’s simple physics, moving in one direction and creating movement in the opposite direction at that same time results in not moving, movement cancells. If we bring this concept to our life, you have come to a complete stop. You have become stuck. Your desire or are call to go in one direction that is mindless, is what has been told to you to do, t’s what’s normal and your desire, your dream is to go in another direction that is whole and mindful, but crazy, not accepted by those around you. Our Collective Soul in the human realm has reached an impasse, a point of no return, and now you are stopped and stuck until you decide which way you will go. STUCK or FLOW. Dark or Light. Pain or Joy. Chaos or Meaning. Destruction or Creation. You understand this. Weigh your options, be open to change, to flow in new waters, waters that even knowing are unknown to you, feel like the option you should of taken long time ago. Options that will get you closer to live a meaningful happy life. Be open to dream a new dream, walk a new path, YOUR PATH and not anybody else’s.

 We have been stopped so that we may once again see clearly as a collective. Again, let’s go to questions. Where do you want to go? Which direction do you want to take? How do you want to live? You are being given this short time, this blink of an eye in all your lifetimes on this earth to decide your reality. 

  This is an invitation to dream a new dream. To create or re-create your own narrative. Even now, as you place your attention on your Highest Potentiality for this lifetime, which is most certainly not how you have been thinking and not how you have been living, you see that there are new possibilities you have never considered. So consider this - You have stopped yourself so you can see, so you can open your eyes to the priceless time you have, to be you in this lifetime - We only have THIS MOMENT once.

 Nothing is as it Seems - What do you mean by that? The news, the rumor, the influence all of this is false. Mmm not really, there is a problem in the world, there is people dying, there is a huge problem with people not having a job. Yes all that is part of the reality, but who’s reality? what is real is your reality, and your reality does not unfold in a news stream, in social media, in politics. What is real is how you experience one moment, then the next. Check your Nowness now, be present, sense your reality. Are you breathing? Take a deep breath now. Are you alive? Of course you are. Is there any joy within you? There absolutely is so. This is what is true. This is the reality and dimension that you have created. Enjoy it, and if you are in a dimension or reality that you dislike, here is your opportunity to shift it, to re-connect to a reality that you LOVE.

 What is valuable to you now is the support of two things: 

First, the gifts of Mother Earth, panache mama, Gaia, which will instantly ground you, welcome you, calm and soothe you. One leaf, one breath of wind, one river flowing, one soaring bird, all this is healing. And so I invite you to connect to earth, to the elements, to seek peace with the mother, Gaia, panache mama, our home, the only one we have.  

  Second is with your own soul, Connect with god, angels, Jesus, Buda or whatever you wish and believe you need to reconnect to in meditation, in prayer, in dreaming, and begin to see that what is possible is so much more than what you have imagined. Connect to faith, believe, hope vibrations that will reconnect you to the energy of LOVE. Begin to see that your new dream is being dreamt even now, and the more you dream how you would like things to be: beautiful, loving, natural, enjoyable, meaningful. This is what you are creating for your own reality, and this is what you are creating together for the collective. 

 Change is HERE, change is within you, change is NOW.

Much love, 

[jadeottsel]

Tagged by @spacefoxy-irl!

50 things you’ve never been asked. Let’s lighten the mood and have some fun! I always enjoy reading these and seeing a quick glimpse into my friend’s lives~

1. What is the color of your hairbrush? Mint green with pink roses on it.

2. Name a food that you never eat. Oysters. And cooked button mushrooms.

3. Are you typically too warm or too cold? Too warm.

4. What is your favorite candy bar? I have 3! Twix, Kitkat, Whatchamacallit.

5. What where you doing 45 minutes ago? Checking my villagers on Animal Crossing.

6. Have you ever been to a professional sports game? Yep.

7. Favorite flavor of ice cream? Phish Food (Ben and Jerry’s)

8. Last thing you had to drink? Coke Classic.

9. Do you like your wallet? Sort of? It’s an old Steven Universe one. I want one of those fancy Disney/Loungefly wallets but I’ve not found one that’s suited me yet. xD;

10. The last thing you ate? Porkchops, Creamer Potatoes and mixed Veggies.

11. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? I...ordered a Hazbin Hotel Alastor shirt (the one where he’s in blacklight colors), and a shirt with Luci from Disenchantment on it from Shark Robot...that count?

12. Last sporting event you watched? I don’t watch sports willingly. I don’t remember. xD

13. What’s your favorite flavor of popcorn? Butter! (not from those microwave bags though. yuck!)

14. Last thing you said out loud? "FUCKING HELL” (in reference to my animal crossing island getting rain. Again. Trying to crossbreed flowers is HELL.)

15. Last person you messaged? Mills.

16. Ever been camping? Yep, plenty of times when I was younger.

17. Do you take vitamins? Sometimes. I have gummy vitamins :D

18. Do you go to church every Sunday? Hahahaha...No. :D

19. Do you have a tan?  I don’t tan, I burn. :B No.

20. Do you prefer Chinese food over pizza? It really depends on the kind of pizza, and on the kind of chinese food!

21. Do you drink soda with a straw? Yep, I have some reuseable straws I use. I just don’t like putting my mouth on the can. ^^;

22. What color socks do you usually wear? Light grey.

23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit? I don’t drive at all! :D

24. What terrifies you? Death; being alone, being abandoned.

25. Look to your left. What do you see?  The bedroom door?

26. What chore do you hate the most?  Cleaning the dishes. I don’t like sticking my hands in gross food water. I wish we had a dishwashing machine. :C

27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? Probably hell of stereotypical, but Arnold Schwartzenegger? ^^;

28. What is your favorite soda? Coke, Cherry coke, Dr. Pepper.

29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive through? In the fast food place (before the quarantine), as I don’t drive and it’s hell understanding the workers over the speakers.

30. What is your favorite number? 999. (It’s a Haunted Mansion thing...yes I’m aware what it is upside down, I don’t care.)

31. Who is the last person you talked to? Bolt (my S/O)

32. Favorite cut of beef?  Porterhouse. It has more meat on it, especially on the left side, which is part of the psoas major, which is otherwise known as the tenderloin, which is what’s made into filet mignon! (I know a bit too much about this sorry xD)

33. Last song you listened to?  “Just Sing” from the Trolls: World Tour soundtrack.

34. Last book you read?  I...don’t remember sadly.

35. Favorite day of the week?  As of late they all kinda slur together. Probably Monday? IDK. But I sadly now hate the weekend because my sister comes over and I...do not like her. :T

36. Can you say the alphabet backwards?  Given some time, sure.

37. How do you like your coffee?  With lots of sugar, and chocolate, and well...honestly, I should probably be drinking Hot Cocoa, because I don’t like it if it tastes overtly like coffee. LOL

38. Favorite pair of shoes?  I have one pair. I don’t have a favorite. :V

39. Time you usually get up?  On a good day? 10am-11am. On a bad one? Not before 1pm.

40. What do you prefer? Sunsets or sunrises? Sunsets.

41. How many blankets on your bed?  Two!

42. Describe your kitchen please?  Small, and honestly a mess at the moment.

43. Describe your kitchen at the moment? See above.

44. Do you have a favorite alcoholic drink? Mai Tai! (Has to be a mixed drink, as I dislike straight alcohol.)

45. Do you play cards?  Cards Against Humanity count?

46. What color is your car?  Again, can’t drive, so I don’t have a car. XD

47. Can you change a tire?  ....No?

48. Your favorite state?  uh......Relaxation? :T

49. Favorite job you’ve had?  Working at the Disney Store. It only made minimum wage, and I was mostly restocking and a greeter, but it was an enviroment I felt comfortable working in.

50. How did you get your biggest scar?  I have a particularly large vertical running scar on my back...no idea how I even got it though. :x Tagging...no one! Do it if you feel like it. :D

[michaelfallcon]

You Could Use A Nice Cup Of Tea

Headlines are lessons that ring with truth: you could probably use a nice cup of tea right now. Fortunately for you this very website called Sprudge—the world’s most popular coffee publication, hi, thanks for reading—is also the coffee industry’s leading tea publication, home to a deep and growing bank of thoughtful tea content. We do it because we love drinking tea, sharing tea, and telling stories about tea. Tea is good! But also because we believe tea has an important role to play in the life of the modern coffee lover, especially as part of a well-rounded home beverage situation. It can also be an additional way to support the companies you love in these strange times.

To that end, we’ve put together this here quick recommendation guide to get you steeping and re-steeping from the comfort of your own home. This is but one wee list of tea recommendations; for a more sprawling read, check out our previous mega-guide to buying tea online, plus this feature on the wonders of tea ceramics and this one on why tisanes are also good.

For your general well-being, for your mental health, and to support good businesses and artisan makers around the world, let’s drink some tea!

Rishi Tea 

Our friends and partners at Rishi Tea set the gold standard for tea collaboration in a coffee context, and you’ll find their teas served in tandem with some of the finest coffees in the world. Shopping online with Rishi means entering into a universe of choice, from teawares to Sparkling Botanicals to matcha to a beautiful range of herbal tisanes helpfully organized by function. But I’m most especially here for Rishi’s extraordinary Garden Direct range of fine and rare teas, many sourced from individual artisan tea producers across Asia. If you’ve never had really good Phoenix Dancong before, start there—it’s a kind of complex, utterly delicious roasted oolong from southeast China that tastes sweet, floral, and wonderfully caramelized all at the same time, not unlike a really good Gesha. I also love that piquant, bittersweet range of flavors—mushroom, ocean breeze, nori—you get from high quality Gyokuru from Japan, and Rishi Garden Direct has the good stuff.

But again, it’s a choose your own adventure here at Rishi’s website and through their partnerships with a range of fine coffee brands. If you want to shop around support coffee companies amidst your tea habit, check out the yummy Elderberry Healer blend (via Olympia Coffee Roasting Company) and pick up Rishi’s easy to use “Simple Brew” loose leaf tea pot (available here via Verve) with which to brew it.

Really this is just scratching the surface! Go explore the Rishi website. They’re shipping free right now within the United States for orders starting at $30.

Kilogram Tea

Kilogram Tea of Chicago is an American tea company born out of many years of experience sourcing tea in collaboration with Intelligentsia Coffee. Today the brand is distinct in style and intention, but continues to compliment the coffee offerings at Intelligentsia coffee bars nationwide. Like its coffee sibling, Kilogram’s offerings are built on seasonality, which means the New, Seasonal section of their website is where you should start. Here right now you’ll find a lovely medium steamed Sencha, as well as a lightly steamed offering, both from impeccable producers.

From there you can check out a range of additional offerings, from a benchmark organic Tieguanyin to really yummy Early Spring Snow Sprout to a concise, thoughtful selection of teawares for wherever you’re at in your tea journey. Subscribers receive 15% off their first order and orders within the Continental US ship free after $35.

Equator Coffees’ “Leaf & Water”

Tea is a longtime part of the story for Equator Coffees, which means you can shop for your tea habit while supporting a great specialty company (that’s also a B Corp). Check out classic, crowd-pleasing profiles like Yunnan Black, White Peony, or Dragon Well, plus a host of herbal blends. Combine with a coffee order while you’re at it, and enjoy free shipping on all orders right now from Equator.

Dogwood Coffee’s Cascara

Okay, cascara isn’t technically tea—actually, it’s a tisane—but Dogwood Coffee of Minneapolis has that good cascara right now, perfect for cold brewin’, baking, or plain old steeping it up hot with a splash of good honey.

Kettl Tea

Kettl Tea of Brooklyn continue to make a name for themselves as perhaps the United States’ finest purveyors of fine Japanese tea. If you’re a matcha at home person this is what you’ve been searching for, from top of the line single cultivar sets to solid entry level options. I’m consistently floored by how good the Gyokuro teas—perfect for spring!—are from Kettl, as well as their low-caffeine, high flavor mildly roasted Hojicha offerings. From the incredibly wonderful matcha chocolate to kiddo friendly soba cha, this is stuff you’ll want to share with your friends and family. Sign up for their newsletter and get 10% off your order, and enjoy free shipping within the United States right now.

Floating Mountain

It’s hard to substitute for the meditative calm of drinking tea in Floating Mountain’s stunning Upper West Side gallery space in Manhattan. But in the era of social distancing, Floating Mountain’s webshop will suffice. Shop here for impeccably sourced “rock teas” (Yancha)—something about a Purple Robe or a Big Red Robe feels perfect for our current Work From Home moment. Really stunning teas.

Spirit Tea

Spirit Tea have established themselves as the tea purveyor at several fine coffee bars around the United States—you can find one near you using the brand’s shop locator. On the retail side Spirit offer a range of teas from around the world, including helpful bundles like this matcha starter set, or the oolong tea sampler. All orders ship free, no minimum buy required.

Stand.still Tea

Up-and-coming Los Angeles tea purveyors fusing the ancient art of tea brewing with influences from hip hop and cannabis cultures. Check out “The Come Up,” Stand.still’s all-in-one sampler box that includes four different kinds of teas, a reusable tea filter and bamboo spoon.

Mizuba Matcha

Yummy Portland, Oregon based purveyors of matcha teas. Go with the matcha set and be sure to peruse their cool selection of teawares.

Tanglewood Chai

Chai is synonymous with the coffee bar experience, but draws on a centuries-old tradition of tea and spice blending from India. Tanglewood Chai of Portland, Oregon are writing a new script for what chai means here in America, selling a small range of wonderfully spiced concentrates ready for home use in a variety of ways. Whether combined with steamed milk a la your favorite coffee shop or purposed towards home baking, craft cocktails and sodas, this is honestly some of the best chai we’ve ever tasted.

Get a cool tea subscription + keep reading

Beloved tea nerd brands like White2Tea, The Tea PL, and many more offer cool home tea subscriptions, which is a wonderful way to discover more about what you do and don’t like from the wonderful world of tea. Not to keep outlinking to the same page but we’re really proud of the tea writing we’ve published over the last few years on Sprudge so check it out, drink tea with us, and keep diving here for many, many more online tea seller suggestions and write-ups.

Jordan Michelman is a co-founder and editor at Sprudge Media Network.

Photos in this feature by Zachary Carlsen and Anthony Jordan III for Sprudge Media Network. 

Much more content at Sprudge.com/tea

You Could Use A Nice Cup Of Tea published first on https://medium.com/@LinLinCoffee