#Where Can I Travel Alone
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i need to get this out of my head before i continue clone^2 but danny being the first batkid. Like, standard procedure stuff: his parents and sister die, danny ends up with Vlad Masters. He drags him along to stereotypical galas and stuff; Danny is not having a good time.
He ends up going to one of the Wayne Galas being hosted ever since elusive Bruce Wayne has returned to Gotham. Vlad is crowing about having this opportunity as he's been wanting to sink his claws into the company for a long while now. Danny is too busy grieving to care what he wants.
And like most Galas, once Vlad is done showing him off to the other socialites and the like, he disappears. Off to a dark corner, or to one of the many balconies; doesn't matter. There he runs into said star of the show, Bruce who is still young, has been Batman for at least a year at this point, but still getting used to all these damn people and socializing. He's stepped off to hide for a few minutes before stepping back into the shark tank.
And he runs into a kid with circles under his eyes and a dull gleam in them. Familiar, like looking into a mirror.
Danny tries to excuse himself, he hasn't stopped crying since his parents died and it's been months. He rubs his eyes and stands up, and stumbles over a half-hearted apology to Mister Wayne. Some of Vlad's etiquette lessons kicking in.
Bruce is awkward, but he softens. "That's alright, lad," he says, pulling up some of that Brucie Wayne confidence, "I was just coming out here to get some fresh air."
There's a little pressing; Bruce asks who he's here with, Danny says, voice quiet and grief-stricken, that he's with his godfather Vlad Masters. Bruce asks him if he knows where he is, and Danny tells him he does. Bruce offers to leave, Danny tells him to do whatever he wants.
It ends with Bruce staying, standing off to the side with Danny in silence. Neither of them say a word, and Danny eventually leaves first in that same silence.
Bruce looks into Vlad Masters after everything is over, his interest piqued. He finds news about him taking in Danny Fenton: he looks into Danny Fenton. He finds news articles about his parents' deaths, their occupations, everything he can get his hands on.
At the next gala, he sees Danny again. And he looks the same as ever: quiet like a ghost, just as pale, and full of grief. Bruce sits in silence with him again for nearly ten minutes before he strikes a conversation.
"Do you like to do anything?"
Nothing. Just silence.
Bruce isn't quite sure what to do: comfort is not his forte, and Danny doesn't know him. He's smart enough to know that. So he starts talking about other things; anything he can think of that Brucie Wayne might say, that also wasn't inappropriate for a kid to hear.
Danny says nothing the entire time, and is again the first to leave.
Bruce watches from a distance as he intercts with Vlad Masters; how Vlad Masters interacts with him. He doesn't like what he sees: Vlad Masters keeps a hand on Danny's shoulder like one would hold onto the collar of a dog. He parades him around like a trophy he won.
And there are moments, when someone gets too close or when someone tries to shake Danny's hand, of deep possessiveness that flints over Vlad Masters' eyes. Like a dragon guarding a horde.
He plays the act of doting godfather well: but Bruce knows a liar when he sees one. Like recognizes like.
Danny is dull-eyed and blank faced the entire time; he looks miserable.
So Bruce tries to host more parties; if only so that he can talk to Danny alone. Vlad seems all too happy to attend, toting Danny along like a ribbon, and on the dot every hour, Danny slips away to somewhere to hide. Bruce appears twenty minutes later.
"I was looking into your godfather's company," he says one night, trying to think of more things to say. Some nights all they do is sit in silence. "Some of my shareholders were thinking of partnering up--"
"Don't."
He stops. Danny hardly says a word to him, he doesn't even look at him -- he's sitting on the ground, his head in his knees. Like he's trying to hide from the world. But he's looking, blue eyes piercing up at Bruce.
Bruce tilts his head, practiced puppy-like. "Pardon?"
"Don't." Danny says, strongly. "Don't make any deals with Vlad."
It's the most words Danny's spoken to him, and there's a look in his eyes like a candle finding its spark. Something hard. Bruce presses further, "And why is that?"
The spark flutters, and flushes out. Danny blinks like he's coming out of a trance, and slumps back into himself. "Just don't."
Bruce stares at him, thoughtful, before looking away. "Alright. I won't."
And they fall back into silence.
Danny, when he leaves, turns to look at Bruce, "I mean it." He says; soft like he's telling a secret, "Don't make any deals with him. Don't be alone with him. Don't work with him."
He's scampered away before Bruce can question him further.
(He never planned on working with Vlad Masters and his company; he's done his research. He's seen the misfortune. But nothing ever leads back to him. There's no evidence of anything. But Danny knows something.)
At their next meeting, Danny starts the conversation. It's new, and it's welcomed. He says, cutting through their five minute quiet, that he likes stars. And he doesn't like that he can't see them in Gotham.
Bruce hums in interest, and Danny continues talking. It's as if floodgates had been opened, and as Bruce takes a sip of his wine, it tastes like victory.
("Tucker told me once--") ("Tucker?") ("Oh-- uh, one of my best friends. He's a tech geek. We haven't talked in a while.")
(Danny shut down in his grief -- his friends are worried, but can't reach him. When he goes back to the manor with Vlad, he fishes out his phone and sends them a message.)
(They are ecstatic to hear from him.)
It all culminates until one day, when Danny is leaving to go back inside, that Bruce speaks up. "You know," He says, leaning against the railing. "The manor has many rooms; plenty of space for a guest."
The implication there, hidden between the lines. And Danny is smart, he looks at Bruce with a sharp glean in his eyes, and he nods. "Good to know."
The next time they see each other, Danny has something in his hands. "Can you hold onto something for me?" He asks.
When Bruce agrees, Danny places a pearl into his palm. or, at least, it's something that looks like a pearl. Because it's cold to the touch; sinking into Bruce's white silk gloves with ease and shimmering like an opal. It moves a little as it settles into his hand, and the moves like its full of liquid.
Bruce has never seen anything like it before, but he does know this; it's not human. "What is it?" He asks, and Danny looks uncomfortable.
"I can't tell you that." He says, shifting on his foot like he's scared of someone seeing it. "But please be careful with it. Treat it like it's extremely fragile."
When Bruce gets home, he puts it in an empty ring box and hides the box in the cave. He tries researching into what it is. he can't find anything concrete.
Everything comes to a head one day when Danny appears at the manor's doorstep one evening, soaking wet in the rain, and bleeding from the side.
#dpxdc#dp x dc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc crossover#dpdc#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc prompt#man i just really need more dpdc stuff where danny and bruce have a good relationship. like man i NEED it. like i need to see these two#bonding together. and not in a cracky 'oh danny is a distant friend/cousin/etc' stuff but like. active participants in each other's lives#or as active as can be in this case. i neeeeed these two getting along and caring about one another#this idea came to me like last night and hasn't left since nd it was driving me up the wall to think about both positively and negatively b#i neeeded someone to hear about this or i was gonna implode#danny is the first son#tried to just get the general gist of the idea down but i definitely thought of the idea that bruce lowkey suspects vlad for having a hand#Vlad allows Danny to sneak off because he thinks Danny is alone. if he knew Bruce was there he'd be piiisssed and would put a stop to it#Sam and Tucker are alive they just got ghosted for a bit by danny bc he was in Major Grief and didn't wanna socialize. He couldn't go to#them because he didn't wanna put them in danger via Vlad.#oh that thing he handed Bruce? Yeah that's his ghost core. I have a headcanon (that isnt always applied) that ghosts can take their cores#out of their bodies at will and painlessly and without issue. and its common practice actually to do so bc they can be a not insignificant#distance away from said core before problems start to act up. and its common for ghosts to leave their physical cores at their lairs for#safekeeping because as long as the physical core is fine: so is the ghost. they can reform if their body gets destroyed. it also acts as a#fast travel sometimes. where they can reform at their core in an instant. its not inspired in the slightest by SU but i do see the overlap#most cores are pretty small for safety sake: its harder to hit if its small. and they're pr resilient too but its better to be safe than#sorry. so yeah. danny essentially gave bruce the physical embodiment of his soul and indirectly said#'if anything happens to me at least i'll be safe with you'#danny doesn't know he's batman btw#starry rambles.#was gonna go into danny becoming a vigilante beside bruce but im sleeeepy so i'll do that in a reblog. he's gonna go by nightingale if#anyone is interested. stereotypical but to be frank it is a *good* name imo. has a good amount of syllables and consonants to it#and the bird theme. and since its part of an ancestral name it has even more backing for it being bird-y without being meta
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"Penelope should have chosen Debling!"
My sister in Christ. . .he literally dumped her???
Like just before Colin Bridgerton was on his knees after outrunning her carriage to profess how he can't stop thinking about her in his love me, choose me, I'm yours speech, Debling did the Regency equivalent of calling her a floozy who would undoubtedly cheat on him when he abandoned her for several years to chase his passions (because she would never be one of said passions since she asked outright if he could ever come to care for her and he went 'hmmmm seems unlikely! good thing you have solitary hobbies to occupy you instead!') when he has been given 0 evidence of such other than realizing she liked to look out the window because she had a crush on the boy across the street. I was ready to challenge that man to a duel for Pen's honor
His feelings for her were middling at best, I mean Christ on a Pogostick, after he asked her mum for permission to propose he isn't even happy when he opens the door and Pen is there? She's looking like a snack- nay, a whole ass MEAL, and he can't even smile? He just nods at her and dips the fuck out? You don't think it would kill Penelope to know that both her sisters have husbands who absolutely adore them and she's out here with an absent dude who likely won't even write to her?
Portia's 'Love is make believe!' speech is so transparently full of shit when you realize that we've got Dankworth who is so obsessed with Prudence that he makes heart eyes at her every waking moment and considers her his little bonbon and Albion who loves Phillipa so much that he was waiting for her to consent to sex (not realizing she didn't know what it was) for two entire years because he would never pressure her and so he was content with finishing in his pants when he kissed her to make sure she was comfortable. And you want Penelope to settle for a life of loneliness? When Colin is so besotted with her that he dreams of her and breaks every societal expectation in the book as a notorious People Pleaser to run after her and cannot even wait for the morning after being intimate with her to introduce her as his wife to his family in the middle of the night? You want her to turn down Mr "When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible" Bridgerton? For LORD PENGUIN?
Be so serious right now
#polin#bridgerton#penelope featherington#colin bridgerton#lord debling#good old alfie d giving us absolutely NOTHING#'it would be so great to have a husband who is never there so I can live my life in peace!!!!' like. . .are you sure. . .you like men?#as a queer woman i get it: he'd be great for a wlw because like byeeeeee who needs love from a man when i can be left alone w/ my hot besti#but like. . .penelope wants love. . .and she DESERVES love and she wants her husband to love her!!!!#the featherington husbands are obsessed with their wives and you want pen to be out here alone in a big house? for why?????#tell me you hate penelope featherington without telling me you hate penelope featherington#she deserves her hot ass husband who finds her in every room and event they're in and hypes her up and eats the same food she does#so he can taste what she tastes#and kiss all over her and take her on his travels and show her the world and inform her that she's fantastic and kiss her all the time#and show her how much he wants her no matter where they are#LIKE BE FORREAL#you really want penelope out here with an absent husband so she can keep writing a gossip column that makes her cry all the time?#byeeeeeeee
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The fact that Leo can go literally anywhere on earth to be alone with his thoughts at a single moment’s notice is something that shakes around in my head all the time. Like, portals and teleportation are amazing and convenient abilities both in and out of battle, but they could also so easily be used to run away as well.
I don’t think Leo ever would, at least not most of the time. He loves his family too much, and is too dependent on their love and attention to cut himself off so suddenly like that, but it’s a very real possibility nonetheless.
It’s a good thing Leo’s overall temper is more on the mild side and he prefers going to his room or something to complete solitude, because it really is dangerous for a kid to have the ability to isolate themselves like that at their fingertips.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rottmnt headcanons#rise leo#and like#it doesn’t even have to be on purpose either#anything could happen where Leo goes out to travel real quick somewhere and suddenly he can’t get back#sure Donnie has the trackers but trackers only do so much when the one you’re tracking is across the globe#that one short of Leo ending up trapped hanging off the Eiffel Tower all alone when he’s still new to portaling#is actually a bit terrifying when viewed through a more serious adult lens#don’t mind me just doing what I like to do best aka think about Leo and his abilities#I’m still saying tho that his abilities make running away so easily#and he’s quite good at that#even if he’s physically there his MASK lets him run away from truly processing unwanted situations or conversations#imagine Draxum telling the boys about the other hidden cities and Leo takes it upon himself to go scout them out#and he does so going around and letting his bros know of the cities he finds here and there#only to end up in one that cuts off foreign mystic energy#like imagine being suddenly cut off and alone#this ability can be SO USEFUL up until it’s cut off midway and suddenly uh oh it’s horrifying
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One of the probable reasons as to why Kaeya didn't arrive on time for Crepus and Diluc when they were attacked was because he, and the knights with him, had no vision, and thus, cannot use a teleport waypoint.
Him receiving his cryo vision when he was supposed to get scorched by Diluc was genuinely the biggest slap to the face given to him by Celestia. It arrived just in time to save HIM.
Even now, the vision only heals and shields him alone as a manifestation of his desire to keep living from that fight... but he can't use it to help others.
#ngl this description was a shock to see purely coz wtf were inazuma vision bearers doing lmao#unless they didnt want to leave their countrymen alone while the decree was still up#kaeya#kaeya alberich#yeah idk what else to say about it other than the fact that Kaeya's vision is the biggest middle finger from celestia#celestia: lol f this kid specifically. he did nothing wrong but his fam sure did#1 more thing but do they have to approach a teleport waypoint to use it?#im assuming they do purely coz they dont memorize where all the other waypoints are#ngl this opens up to other ideas like cyno tighnari and collei travelling instead of teleporting is coz nari hasnt been to mond#same with others taking a boat coz they havent encountered that waypoint yet#i guess that explains things for most inazuma vision bearers actually :O they havent left the nation so they cant unlock the other waypoints#wow i have a lot of thoughts here in the tags yet again. kaeyachi with the tags that can be a whole entire post instead.#right back to kaeyangst but seriously what a wicked timing. him receiving it too late to prevent everything#him also receiving it just in time to let him continue living his life full of lies...(his own words not mine)#did he start learning how to use it immediately? did he fear its usage because it meant celestia was watching him?#did he stare at it in betrayal? throw it off a cliff? hide it in his drawers?#so many thoughts hnghh
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not a fan of dadow but shit man it does kinda make sense sometimes idk
#i mean if you were immortal and had a friend from the future wouldn't you look for them once they're born just to at least see if they're#doing okay??#like idk what dadow is about in the fandom bc i dont really care about that content like it sounds so wrong and bad when were talking about#shadow and silver from the timeline where silver goes back in time all those times bla bla bla but in a fixed future? where he never does#cause they've fixed the past and made sure it's okay and silver is born and its like an alternate universe i guess? time travel fucked up#i mean shadow would probably check on him i guess#and knowing that child he would be alone eating rocks and drinking gasoline from the streets no matter if its a good future or a bad one#so shadow would either take care of him or find someone who can#lmfao i dont wanna say knuckles but fuck man i do wanna say knuckles but also idk
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yOu'Re gOiNg fOr a LiTeR? | "Habs react to Quebec Maple facts", 10.22.24
#guys this is not becoming a regular thing this is just the mental illinois breaking through but ALSO I SAW THIS AND SCREAMEDDDDD#they did this For Me. those are all my guys. like yes yes we know about xhekovský but that’s my adopted austrian son david reinbacher!!!#that’s my baby goalie carey price time travel cowboy son cayden primeau!!!! and i just LOVE that they were like#‘yeah so one of them is gonna be a bitch in both pairs. & yeah we’re gonna make them lose.’ & i am HERE for it. you know the media day vid#where they asked all of them who was brat on the team and like 75% said slaf which we all KNEW? yes. correct. even more evidence godddd#also empathize so much with him because i hate feeling stupid & he is notably like. a very smart guy w/good awareness of broader society#and sorry to get like this on a silly little post i’m about to fanfiction-ify before i have xhekovský hours but so much of this goes back#to the xenophobia in the nhl and how we treat players (not only that. people in north am/west tbh) whose first language is not english#and degrade/discredit them and their intelligence by virtue of their multilingualism and how we even think about multilingualism as a whole#e.g. the sense that certain languages are perceived as more ‘valuable’ capital/the support that SHOULD be there for language learning simpl#is not from what i can tell in the nhl so even if you wanted to foster an environment of intercultural competency they’re doing nothing to#support it. the stories!! of so many guys! reliant solely upon their teammates for basic necessities! WHERE is your language acquisition#programming. sorry the linguistics language and culture attempted to jump out there & i am not conveying what i want to say at ALL. anyway#juraj's slow descent into madness as u can SEE him visibly getting more & more over it & done is my roman empire. like he's having fun#at first he's laughing 'what is this whiskey?' & i AM thinking that toothy little grin at arber with the jerkoff hand motion about the mapl#syrup only taking a few minutes to come (out) was a dig. lord knows arber deserved it with his shorts pulled all the way up like GOD the me#you put here to wear slutty little 3" shorts live in cold CANADA and have to cover up their thigh tattoos. what a travesty. and the amount#of THIGH in this video i- biting. arber's hairy legs slaf's manspreading more as he gets frustrated & arber teases him i. and DAVID????#on a completely different note cayden with his face covered is giving me INTENSE brainworms i have the most unhinged storylines for him#AND THE BRYNDZOVE HALUSKYYYY everything past 2:00 is gold. david's tired sighs. slaf hating it here. arber having the time of his life#'taste' 'that's not an advantage' DAVID kill him. 'maple syrup specialist... normal guy 🤷' slaf you are the WORST loser and ily for it#arber defending his wife w/his life... juraj's the smartest guy in the room & arber's on his leash about it. it goes both ways (to be cont)#juraj slafkovský#arber xhekaj#david reinbacher#cayden primeau#montreal canadiens#i'm xhekovský posting leave me alone i'm also *****
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Linktober Day 6
Mask(s)
Soft and sweet with just a hint of melancholic because 1.I'm tired and probably need a nap father than coffee, 2.I actually managed to make a pretty good mocha and the Anchorage LOZ animatic came onto my playlist before writing this and it kind of influenced my mood, and 3. I'm saving the usual Majora's Mask flare of angst for another prompt because I was having way too much fun dissecting the tragedy of the Hero of Time before sleep deprivation snatched the idea away which is usually my sign to pass the heck out and save the second option for when I have more energy lol.
For the Warriors fans, also Warriors is a disaster of an older sibling but we adore and appreciate him for it in this household, as always can be implied romantic or platonic between him and reader.
You were all but pinned down to the ground, brought down more effectively and unable to find the strength to get up.
Well, not literally, there were no enemies nearby, the chaos at camp had long since died down and there wasn’t anything much to do now that night had fallen, the heavens deigning to put all of it’s glittering jewels on display.
Were it any other day you’d probably focus more on appreciating it in full, the fire was crackling merrily, you were safe and had a full stomach and even with the ever present threat of the Shadow possibly deciding to ambush you all while most of your guards were down, you had your boys with you and the crisp autumn petrichor was a balm on your soul, weary from the journey.
Maybe it would be fine to rest for a little while.
And then the small figure clinging to you flinched, burrowing closer and holding onto your tunic like a lifeline. And awareness came to you like a smack over the head with a log, your fingers gently carding through blond locks as you hum gently. Weighting options and just how quietly you could move without bothering the precious Sprite at your side.
You had guessed Time had been a sweet kid, and you still wanted to lodge a formal complaint with the gods for writing such cruel fate for him because the man couldn’t catch a break and you’re not the only one to take it personally. But he was killing you here, this is how you die, with an adorable but oh so heartbreakingly sad little boy having fallen asleep leaning against you after telling you all sorts of stories about his extensive mask collection.
(You don’t know wether you want to cry, scream or laugh, Mask was so, so young. It breaks your heart, just a little.
Really, the deities of Hyrule must adore tragedies. Bastards.)
Sighing, you decide to compromise, gently keeping the Kokiri boy right where he is, fast asleep and with barely any nightmares as you hum and card your fingers through the spun gold strands, you brush your fingers through the last masks he fell asleep mid through telling the story of how he’d acquired. If you were careful surely you’d be able to reach his pack on his side so he wouldn’t worry later.
A pair of brown boots invade your vision, Warriors crouches down. You think you spot a flash of surprise on his eyes as he spots Mask napping on you, and then fond amusement of a big brother you knew he directed often towards Wind, tone low, “Well would you look at that, out like a light. It’s a rare honor for him to trust anyone like this.”
You chuckle a bit, shaking your head, “I can tell, he’s a good kid. I’ve barely met him for a day and I’d already take on an army for him.”
“Welcome to my world.”, comes Warriors dry response, though you both knew he was a hundred percent serious, his own mask quickly falling away as he gently picked up the Deku Sprout Mask to put it back in the small sprite’s pouch, hiding it’s confused, fearful sadness from your gaze (and it’s an effort, not to twitch, as your rage towards Majora gained even more kindling to burn) as the soldier handled it with the due solemnity of being one of the few Mask would allow to even touch the masks without his immediate supervision, “... I never thought I’d see him again, as...”
“I know.” Your tone was quiet, as you carefully picked your choice of words.
If there’s one thing you knew about any Link, is that they’re all really good elder brother’s and that they are too hard on themselves. Warriors specially, Mask and Wind were his everything, there wouldn’t be words that could describe how gutted he was, after confirming his suspicions with you, regretting not saying anything against Mask joining the battle field back then, loathing himself for not convincing him or Lana into letting him stay in spite of his bad feeling that as soon as the young hero of time passed through that portal he was unlikely to ever meet him again.
... You settle for something simple, instead, reaching a hand to softly pat his head, taking care not to mess his hair too much, “You did good, Wars, it’s not your fault. Mask also knows you did your best.”
He still, sighing, the mask falling away as he guides your hand to his lips, quietly thankful (really, like big brother like little brother, your wonderful, silly, caring boys. You make a point to cheerfully bat away the butterflies in your stomach, ), “... Feels hard to believe that, some times. Thank you.”
You hum, after putting the Zora mask away, Warriors takes Mask’s other side, pulls you closer and breathes.
(Just in case, he lies to himself.)
You quietly listen to his stories about his little brother, and Warriors is content.
#linked universe x reader#linked universe warriors x reader#will I ever post the original story I was gonna use for this prompt?#who knows certainly not my sleep deprived self lol#more implied than romantic if you ask me but frankly that's about what I expected when Warriors decided to show up on this prompt#man is the most charming of the Chain but you can't tell me he would know where to begin with any sort of romantic feelings#so lots of unspoken understanding happens here instead so it's up to interpretation lol#Reader: I've had Mask for a day and a half but if anything happened to him I'd murder everyone in Hyrule and then myself.#Warriors. Approving: I know this. And I love you (feeling unspecified).#The Rest of the Chain: And we support you#Is Warriors wanting to be close in reference to the Kohga prompt?#Does he just want Mask and Reader close because he is smart enough to infer what happens to him#Does he just want them there because like all Links he has several abandonment issues?#Who knows! I just know that he is rife with trauma tokens so you all can spin the wheel and decide#Mask is probably Warriors biggest regret and I am going to shake people about it if not stopped#You can't tell me that he wouldn't have wanted to take him in once he learned he was an orphan traveling all alone with his pony in the WoA#All Links are big sibling coded just on different wavelengths#The WoA was just Wars accidentally picking up several feral strays while a war happened in the back#ex Mask Wind Tetra Skull Kid and Linkle#summer writes linktober 2023#summer writes
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there was a buffalo that was about to die soon but we were not allowed to tell it to the owner
#and the owner was a farmer whose livelihood depends on the animal#he was so sweet#when you meet with people from village who've travelled long enough for their animals just to get treated#you can see the hope in their wet eyes#this buffalo alone must've cost 1.5 lakh#and the economic gain from is milk is far beyond to sustain livelihood of farmers and their families#but they don't accept that their everything won't survive anymore#and we saw those poor animals#bitch with a tumor she kept whimpering#and a chihuahua who was so weak and helpless we couldn't even collect enough blood for cbc#ive been to clinic few times before this but none of the cases were this bad#also there was this rich lady with her toy breed dog who barely didn't eat for like two days and she got done all the scans and tests done#in moments like this it truly hits the condition of farmers in our country#fucking pathetic#i know its so much easier to open a clinic in metro city for dogs and cats where pets from rich families would come and youncan just do your#little oohs and awws#and no one wants to touch a cow or buffalo or goat because they don't fit in your cute aesthetic animals of what makes you a vet#but i keep thinking about the eyes of those owners as well as their livestock
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freaking like. eshka is getting into gender stuff that’s like. hmmmm this is really uhhhh Close and Personal huh
#when you spin around the gender wheel so much that you kinda end up back where you started#but just a touch to the left#I know I ain’t alone in the whole being so isolated from girlhood growing up bc you didn’t do being a girl correctly#you didn’t act the right way or talk the right way or dress the right way. neurodivergent fat ugly girl problems#blah blah blah girlhood looks different for everyone! can we talk#can we talk about how the influence of ur peers growing up is Incredibly Important#I felt no unity of girlhood growing up. I did not understand having a comforting group of girls to hang out with#I did not understand the sisterhood of the traveling pants#anyway yeah eshka got some vibes of like. being isolated from your given identity as a child#so you turn to self exploration and find comfort in other ways of expressing yourself#and then you eventually arrive at some point of comfort with the identity you were given as a child#she’s 100 percent nb and consider herself trans#it’s just she’s made a weird little. kinda circle#anyway smiles wide I am normal about myself#oc: eshka#something I don’t have in common w her is that she likes math#and her chest + arm tattoos are inspired by that lovr#I’m thinking her face scar is from an accident early in the crows#and that she got sat down and taken care of and realized that this is just another family#one that is. deeply deeply flawed but nevertheless it holds people capable of great evil and great goodness
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oh he is going to be so mad at me next week
#hes so cute fjsjjfjajfjs#baby boy you are not coming to LA with me 😭#me and my halfway packed bag almost a week early bc i still remember my coworkers yelling at me last year#for still not being packed 2 days before a trip nsnsnjsf#im not FULLY packed but im like. halfway there#and i feel SO GUILTY ALREADY bc my babys are gonna be here all alone for like 4 days 😭#my sister will be stopping by to feed them but ;;;;; they're all scaredy cats to everyone but me#which means they probably arent gonna be getting any affection while im gone ;;;#unless they decide to let my sister near them but i doubt it#and i remember last year there was only 1 day where i was gone the whole time-#i was only gone 3 days and 2 of those days were full travel so i was home on either end of them#and ill be leaving in the evening day 1 and returning at ass oclock in the morning day 5.#so ill be gone for the full3 days in the middle of that#and jj and anka were so affectionate and happy to see me after the trip last year so i can only imagine ;;;;#ough#sir jj the cat#shh ac
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I told my coworkers I'm gonna be living in Toronto for a few months this year and one of them is like "Airfare from YYZ to Scotland is super cheap right now, you should come visit!!!" and it's like $600
#like there's a reason im planning to take trains and rental cars through canada 😭#the airfare up there alone is gonna blow my travel budget#I'm hoping to get to europe at some point this year but that's gonna depend on how much my job will fork over#so like. i gotta convince them i can create content from the trip#and a city in scotland where two coworkers already live is NOT gonna be an easy sell
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Everyone wants to take the train to go to every province in the Netherlands in one day, until I pull out the maps and travel plans and they realize I'm actually 100% serious 😔
#the duck quacks#THEY THINK IM JOKING BUT IM NOT#I HAVE THE ROUTE MAPPED OUT AND ITS POSSIBLE TO HIT EVERY PROVINCE!!!!!!#I NEED TO LOOK FOR A QUICKER ROUTE AS APPARENTLY#travelling from 7:00 to 23:45 is 'unreasobable'#amd 'what if we miss a train and end up home after 12' and 'i dont wanna wake up that early' snd 'why the actual fuck would i spend 16 hours#inside a train duck' AND I CALL THEM COWARDS *i am dragged of stage'#anyways i once again should perfect my route coz 17 hours is fun but a lil. just a lil long. and it has many bits where you nwed to switch#trains which i wanna decrease as much as possibls bc constantly worrying ab which stop and which track and which train#can be a bjt tok annoying#also NS doesnt have a proper map for all their stations (they have railways but not full country stations (only local(?)) so finding the#right ones is so annoying bht also weirldy fun! i like puzzling and planning witb trains#the hardest part is just getting a companion bc it isnt as fun to do shenanigans alone sigh
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While I don't know much about it, I would probably bet there are tons of issues with the cruise industry that would make me not actually appreciate it broadly speaking - HOWEVER, I do really love a lot of the interior design of some cruise ships.. How it's almost like a miniature city crammed into one area. Multiple sections with all different aesthetic designs, a variety of shops, restaurants, activity centers, community seating areas, communal use spaces (like gyms, laundry, pools, cafeteria/buffet (which I always love anywhere)), etc. etc. but then also everyone has a little nice clean comfortable looking space of their own to retreat back to if they'd like to be alone. Maybe it's something akin to the idea of 'walkable cities', where everything you could ever want to do is kind of right there just a short walk away? I also especially love how so much stuff is stacked on top of other stuff, a layered cluster of spaces, bright open atriums, and when they're set up with little walkways down the center between a bunch of rooms so it's almost like a mini city street with apartments lining it, etc.. They often seem like they'd be SUCH a cool place to live permanently, IF only something identical was just built on solid land instead lol
#currently watching a channel on youtube where some person is reviews/tours cruise ships or something#and I'm just like wow the whole traveling part would be miserable hell and I would hate trying to get off of the stupid ship everyday#and see seomthing and make it back in time or etc. but OOOOO THE BEDROOMS! love the TINY minifrige!! eeee .. lol#perhaps just an extension of of my obsession with communal spaces. also love hospitals. nursing homes. hotels. AIRPORTS!!!#thats just how humans are meant to live for me. my ideal situation is that sot of thing like big beautiful bright communal places#but i also hate socializing i just like the idea of like. the entire communal world is in front of me but i also have my own little space t#retreat back to. youre not forced to participate. but the world is right outside your window if you WANT to go. ALSO people watching is fun#Plus i think part of what i hate most about Going Places and Doing Things is the commitment of it and traveling#especially in america where its like to get ANYWHERE it's a 3 hour drive or 15 min drive#or 20 min drive or 1 hr bus ride or blah blah. the idea of having plenty of fun little things to do that are all solidified#in ONE single complex that is also where your room is would actually encourage me to do things more because if#my health issues start flaring up or i get overwhelmed or etc. i can literally just... retreat back to my room that is a reasonably short#walk away. instead of like ''UGH now not only do i feel too bad to finish my excursion but ALSO i have a 40 min car ride ahead of me''#etc. Not saying that even in that situation I would become Super Extravert Thing Doer like i still LOOVE a quiet lifestyle mostly alone do#ing the same 5 repetitive tasks over & over again working on specific hobbies. but just that i WOULD go out SLIGHTLY more and do Activities#if the activities were already brought to ME. like a cruise ship layout where you have your little room private space but when you feel#like it on your own terms you could venture out and go to a little cafe or a swimming pool or etc. WITHOUT even having to leave#or get in a car and travel. just walk form your room to The thing. amazing.. ground breaking.. BUT especially the layers are important. I#dont mean just 'have the same features but in a way that theyre on land' I mean LITERALLY translate the EXACT layout of the cruise ship but#on ground instead. Like I want a full community cafeteria on the middle floor of my apartment complex. there should be a pool & waterslide#on the roof. A community games room on the 4th floor. a library right under my bedroom. etc. etc. Though maybe ideally I would say#add a little extra space like most people couldn't live their entire lives in a cruise ship room layout. But maybe just have the rooms expa#nded to the average size of like a 3 bedroom apartment. and then still stack them on top of each other.. More spacious decks so people can#have some plants (but also a community garden somewhere too). ANYWAY... Idk I just always love the aesthetics. I would love to tour a cruis#ship but like NOT go on a cruise EVER lol.. but just.. SEE the space. I love interiors so much. Also makes me think of worldbuilding like.#I think cruise ships could also be good inspiration for underground stacked cities in layers. things like that. OR just actually the fant#asy world version of a cruise ship lol. Though Nanyevimi's oceans are all so treacherous that non-inland water travel is avoided as much as#possible (even if it's more tedious to travel on the land) and would rarely be done for leisure. still.. river cruises could exist.. >:3c#In Nanyevimi the oceans are akin to how Outer Space is on earth (seen as a mysterious unexplored dangerous area etc).. a cruise ship of#rich elves setting out on a Groundbreaking First Ever Ocean Cruise & it just goes Wrong like a sci-fi 'trapped in space' type thriller LOL
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My digimon :]
#some of these are alot older than others. for example i made pekomon in middleschool. meanwhile i made kweemon and the unamed stress ball#like 2 years ago.#my art#artists on tumblr#digimon#aloemon and tikemon are my digimon partners but the others (apart from stress ball) just hang out.#i have alot of notes and ideas for a series around my digimon sona...#I also like the idea of putting me/my sona into the story of a soul journey.#they were sucked into the digiworld alone in a time of non termoil and now they have to survive and make friends along the way!#has all of the charm of the original digimon anime where its all alice in wonderland/ random stuff from our world out of context in the#digital world. and the only real conflict is man vs environment. they dont start with their digital partners and actsholly meet pekomon#first. pekomon just sort of follows dare around and shows up randomly. theres plenty of time for digital dare to travel with the bois so i#didnt want them to be handed to them right off the bat. humans have been to the digital world before and some of the digimon digital dare#mets remeber seeing humans.#story of learning that growing up dosent necessarily have to involve growing up. you can keep injoying the things you injoy as an adult tha#you did as a kid. its also mainly about found family and recovering from the shity times that came before.#in the end digital dare whoudlent want to leave the digital world but need to anyways... in the end credits it whould show digital dare#getting a messege on their computer from their digimon friends.#its implyed they get to keep in touch even when they are oh so far apart.#99% of digital dare's messeges to pekomon are just them sending pekomon cool pictures that they took.
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...
#if u r curious abt following the saga that is my life:#i did finally accept an official offer from a school this afternoon. which is a huge relief and really exciting#and for once i think i did something that will b good for me in mind and body lol bc i think i could b happy with any of the places i#applied to but this program is most geared to my interests and its in a place where i think i can have fun due to the accessibility#of nature and the mountains haha. like at rutgers i think i could have got a good education and had a lot of opportunities but i think it#would have crushed my soul a lil bc it would b more high pressure and in the city. ya kno? so i hopefully i dont regret the choice lol#i still have to wait on the offical acceptance stuff but now at least i can allow myself to get excited abt the potential project and start#researching. which i mean ill have 5yrs of a phd for that but idk im excited and my life feels so empty and meaningless rn ive gotta take#the excitement where i can haha#anyway housing is gonna b a bitch bc there arent a lot of places available in grad student price ranges in the city to the point where they#said so in the official offer rip. and i have to decide when im leaving the southwest bc i could stay til August or leave in july and take#like a whole almost 2 months to just not b doing anything for a sec. and my dad was like !!! u could go to the crazy state parks#or drive out to the pacific northwest! and that would b amazing but also that sounds so scary to do on my own lol#like i dont wanna b missing and murdered as a youngish non guy traveling alone#but i could do it if i tried im sure. anyway i just wanted to let yall kno#bc im so doom and gloom on here all the time but a transition period is looming so im only stuck here for a few more months#and hopefully itll b a page turn into a happier place haha#watch out yellowstone cyanobacteria. im coming for u >:-]#knock on wood. ya kno. just in case#hhhh at least i can breathe a lil better now i have a direction#unrelated
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Something I want to build on with vincent at some point is how much the years of being an adventurer has taken a toll on him. he spent so long just being angry at the world but as he gets closer and closer to carteneau he does start recognizing how reckless he's been and the mistakes he's made over the years. friendships (especially with layla and nhea) helping him get a little closer to how he used to be before finally stopping and trying to do better for himself when he loses his leg. and the fact that guilt has really solidified in him to still make him push himself in his healing rather than combat (though sometimes still pushing himself too far) and how the years of treating himself like a weapon have taken a toll on his mind (he has terrible nightmares that only a select few have been able to help him through it)
#look at me building on vincent more#though this stuff isn't actually new and i'm pretty sure i've mentioned some of it before#but i'd like to round it out more#like nhea being his first friend after leaving gridania that wasn't just a one off working together#or how his and gaius's relationship started because of that mutual understanding of wanting to be better even if their reasons differed#little things like that mainly because i honestly really like how. varied his personality can be#he's usually really calm and collected but now and then he makes some really reckless moves that's more akin to his WoL days#finding ways to make the nightmares easier to more avoidable ranging from meditation to a good solid support at his back#the support being a literal wall sometimes when he was still traveling alone or sharing a cot with gaius when he joins up with them#that bit of safety making a bigger difference than he would've expected though it's not always perfect#i have had thoughts on the zodiark fight because he gets stuck as a tank with a weapon he's not overly familiar with#and that ends up with his leg getting busted up and cid and nero being a little too busy to fix it so he's relegated to helping other ways#which would tie in my idea of his crutches being able to act as a conjurer's staff >:3#my little moon expedition team ends up being the main squad of raya nhea layla and vincent#not sure where einar is at the time since he was in garlemald maybe staying back to help people? probably?#but yea it's 2 monks a white mage and a lancer with a gunblade so goes about as well as you'd expect lol#raya and nhea are both paladins as well so i guess technically one of them could tank instead but hey#this wasn't supposed to be a ramble in the tags kinda post but here we are
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