#oc: eshka

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eshka “rook” de riva (she/her)

casual outfits

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I’ve been rotating the lighthouse room for eshka since I saw the place ngl. but her room is mostly the same as it is in game, save for much more stuff + things are shuffled around. the same greenish blue light with warm candles. but thick curtains block out most of the aquarium light, and the chaise has been turned around to face the door. it’s got copious amounts of blankets and pillows atop it and spilling off the side, all electric and worn—comforting hand-me-downs with a knife under the pillow. Several coffee cups, torn pages from journals and books alike collect on a side table. viago’s various letters all sit in a pile there too, a knife stabbed through the top to keep them in place.

the mirror from the infirmary lives in her room too, several pillows piled up around the base + in front of it. the surface has several cracks, and a chip near the top part of the frame. a dressing screen hides her wardrobe from the door, and there’s always several spare shirts tossed over it—discarded and forgotten. wisps occasionally collect in the bottom of her wardrobe, lethargic and easily spooked.

for the most part, the lighthouse has done little to change the space since she has a nasty habit of regularly reorganizing the space; akin to an animal in an enclosure, or a crow in too small of a cage. she loves the lighthouse, but chafes under its desire to create a comforting space for her, as putting a name to a space that is comfortable is unknown to her. what does it look like? thus the lighthouse doesn’t tamper very often, seemingly understanding that her own hands are enough

so, since the lighthouse adapts everyone's dwellings to the person using that living space, what does your rook's room look like? is it everything they've ever wanted? does it reflect some uncomfortable truth about them? do they prefer sleeping somewhere else in the lighthouse?

i'll start! ippolita's room is only one floor, but has gorgeous vaulted ceilings that make the room feel absolutely massive — a far cry from the tiny rooms she lived in while she was a fledgling and even after she became a full crow. the windows are all stained glass in oranges and reds and golds, and the floors are covered in thick flatweave rugs in an array of styles and patterns to keep her feet warm with the help of the massive fireplace. her bed is a low and cushy thing, piled impossibly high with blankets and pillows, with curtains strung between four ivory posters that keep the light of the fade out of her eyes while she's trying to sleep. she keeps a small chest next to her bed that's oftentimes unlocked, hiding a vial of red pigment and a stack of old letters.

[naerwenia]

Finding my love for Star Wars once again.

I’m so lucky to have such good friends who have kept me in the Star Wars group and helped me get better through years, even when I didn’t know if I actually wanted to play, having lost my interest in Star Wars when my language  teacher chastised me for reading sci-fi, especially Star Wars, and to be “The Good Girl”, I only read classics and poetry. Lately I’ve been listening to all the Thrawn books, Catalyst, more Zahn, and enjoying the Amidala books, finding my admiration for the character again. I got the Star Wars Propaganda book for myself too, as it’s one of those things I would absolutely love seeing more of in the movies and series, just like Eshka Kith’lya, my character in our rpg campaign, uses it to her advantage.

Pic of Eshka Kith’lya by Dingoat

Now I’m writing a short history of our Star Wars RPG campaign and seeing how much everyone has changed! We have more players, more characters, more friends, and more enemies (our enemies <3 Just perfect!). Eshka Kith’lya, my Bothan doctor, has become the face of diplomacy and revolution, when she couldn’t even look into the eyes of her Master in the beginning, only to go against his direct orders later and gaining a powerful enemy. Eshka used to be a pawn in the game of others, being a Bothan sold to a Hutt for political favours, but now directs our own diplomatic alliance that also distributes humanitarian aid around the Galaxy. Power belongs to the people, to the communities, and everyone’s voice should be heard. The change came when I started to feel more comfortable playing, so I felt like I could do more than be the medic, and when I realised the character has negotiation and charm as skills, I used those to help us, even if I didn’t always know what to say as a player, the other players helped.

The campaign is made out of seasons like a tv-series, and between seasons we act as the writers and producers of the series, going through the most impactful moments, what we want in the next season (themes, scenes, genres, etc.), and everything else, like who would the people be shipping and who would be the fan favourite. I’m sure it would be Ral, a human Force user, former Hand of the Emperor, a spy and man of many faces, but Pesmerga, a violet squib mechanic, who’s generally looking like they’re displeased by everything but now has a human pet, Delcin, young man from down under, as an apprentice. But really, operator Valden might be the most loved character, as the whole group loves him. A sith, an imperial operator, only seen as a shadow with a red lightsaber for the first few times, but got away, and then emerged again when Eshka was lost in the Galaxy alone, trying to get back to her crew, and Valden had to team up with her to get into the high society ball for a mission. In return Eshka got a lift back home.

Still, I sometimes wonder why I like Star Wars, or even if I actually like any of it. I’m much more into the books and fan content than the movies or tv-series (though Mandalorian and Book of Boba Fett, as well as Visions, have my attention). Maybe it’s just the fears instilled in me, that I’m not “The Good Girl” if I waste my time with SW, but maybe I can be just a good girl and enjoy what I enjoy, small things that bring me happiness. And if you want to recommend Star Wars books, I’m more than happy to listen!

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"you were never ready to make the sacrifices that leadership requires"

anyway i spent too long editing the one regret mural w mythal into my own version of the final events of veilguard

i borrowed a lot of elements from the other regret murals along with a fair bit of redrawing + copy and paste. it was a fun challenge tho, and ive had this idea stuck in my head for ages

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miss eshka de riva pls give me a chance

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me singing in my head ima barbie girl~

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please god eshka ur arms hoyl fjuck

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proof of concept that got wildly out of hand

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hands u a picture of eshka hands u a picture of eshka hands u a picture--

i wondered if i could pet assan while they were having an intense conversation and yes u can pet the griffon while lucanis talks about how he survived in the ossuary

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share something sunday!

@isayashai tagged me! ty isa! <3 im gonna tag: @starrypawz, @pinayelf, @lvllns, @brightaxe, @curiousstrawberry, @lavellane and genuinely whomever else pls go for it (and tag me i want to seeeeee)

im doing da:tv writing, but redacting stuff for spoilers:

she dragged the mirror from the infirmary to her room down the one sleepless night a few days after [redacted]. Part of rearranging the room once more. Curtains to block the light from the sea life, the couch turned around--better to keep an eye on the door. Blankets and pillows pilled up on the floor beside it. A dressing screen that had finally found a home near the wardrobe where she had originally placed it. She tried not to think too hard about the ravens that screamed and beat their wings bloody circling the inside of their gilded cages in the rafters of the de riva estate. the splotches left on the carpets by flight feathers torn from their sheathes. The wardrobe in her room is big enough to fit several small children inside of it. her own hot breath--covering her ears with her hands to not hear. dragged out kicking and screeching, scratching biting--don't listen, don't listen, don't listen, don't listen-- She stares too long at the dark depths of it sometimes, trying very hard not to think about her hot tears and wobbling lips. She blinks, the lamp light dimming. She turns the wick and it flares to life once more. Soft green light against warm orange and she stares hard at the face in mirror.

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made a scar combo for my gw run for her and was messing w eye swatches and ough eshak with brown eyes......................

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veilguard endgame spoilers:

hammers and bricks! eshka w hammers and bricks to beat solas to death !

jokes aside I think there’s something very sad about how she would choose the irrational and lasting angry choice to kill him or bind him to the veil against his will because the betrayal she should have seen coming did, in fact, happen. she thought it might be different, that they had come to a point of mutual understanding and respect. But no. He would use her as a tool while crying and lamenting about the sacrifices needed to soothe his own regrets.

In her eyes, he has the gall to be upset over such things, and she’s tired of it. Eshka voice to herself: aren’t you tired? don’t you wanna just go apeshit?

so she’s angry—blatantly so, and undisguised in her rage and frustration at solas. there is no being nice to him, because in the end he never cared about her. (deep down the anger is a cover for the hurt of the betrayal and her shame at having trusted him. both are very powerful motivators for her).

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peanut brain of oooo they're standing next to each other~

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kinda obsessed w the visuals

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DISGUSTING I HATE THEM !!!!

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I know everyone loves it, but the companion banter when you hit an enemy with a glorious headshot is just. pacha meme