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phantomrose96 · 9 months ago

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If anyone wants to know why every tech company in the world right now is clamoring for AI like drowned rats scrabbling to board a ship, I decided to make a post to explain what's happening.

(Disclaimer to start: I'm a software engineer who's been employed full time since 2018. I am not a historian nor an overconfident Youtube essayist, so this post is my working knowledge of what I see around me and the logical bridges between pieces.)

Okay anyway. The explanation starts further back than what's going on now. I'm gonna start with the year 2000. The Dot Com Bubble just spectacularly burst. The model of "we get the users first, we learn how to profit off them later" went out in a no-money-having bang (remember this, it will be relevant later). A lot of money was lost. A lot of people ended up out of a job. A lot of startup companies went under. Investors left with a sour taste in their mouth and, in general, investment in the internet stayed pretty cooled for that decade. This was, in my opinion, very good for the internet as it was an era not suffocating under the grip of mega-corporation oligarchs and was, instead, filled with Club Penguin and I Can Haz Cheezburger websites.

Then around the 2010-2012 years, a few things happened. Interest rates got low, and then lower. Facebook got huge. The iPhone took off. And suddenly there was a huge new potential market of internet users and phone-havers, and the cheap money was available to start backing new tech startup companies trying to hop on this opportunity. Companies like Uber, Netflix, and Amazon either started in this time, or hit their ramp-up in these years by shifting focus to the internet and apps.

Now, every start-up tech company dreaming of being the next big thing has one thing in common: they need to start off by getting themselves massively in debt. Because before you can turn a profit you need to first spend money on employees and spend money on equipment and spend money on data centers and spend money on advertising and spend money on scale and and and

But also, everyone wants to be on the ship for The Next Big Thing that takes off to the moon.

So there is a mutual interest between new tech companies, and venture capitalists who are willing to invest $$$ into said new tech companies. Because if the venture capitalists can identify a prize pig and get in early, that money could come back to them 100-fold or 1,000-fold. In fact it hardly matters if they invest in 10 or 20 total bust projects along the way to find that unicorn.

But also, becoming profitable takes time. And that might mean being in debt for a long long time before that rocket ship takes off to make everyone onboard a gazzilionaire.

But luckily, for tech startup bros and venture capitalists, being in debt in the 2010's was cheap, and it only got cheaper between 2010 and 2020. If people could secure loans for ~3% or 4% annual interest, well then a $100,000 loan only really costs $3,000 of interest a year to keep afloat. And if inflation is higher than that or at least similar, you're still beating the system.

So from 2010 through early 2022, times were good for tech companies. Startups could take off with massive growth, showing massive potential for something, and venture capitalists would throw infinite money at them in the hopes of pegging just one winner who will take off. And supporting the struggling investments or the long-haulers remained pretty cheap to keep funding.

You hear constantly about "Such and such app has 10-bazillion users gained over the last 10 years and has never once been profitable", yet the thing keeps chugging along because the investors backing it aren't stressed about the immediate future, and are still banking on that "eventually" when it learns how to really monetize its users and turn that profit.

The pandemic in 2020 took a magnifying-glass-in-the-sun effect to this, as EVERYTHING was forcibly turned online which pumped a ton of money and workers into tech investment. Simultaneously, money got really REALLY cheap, bottoming out with historic lows for interest rates.

Then the tide changed with the massive inflation that struck late 2021. Because this all-gas no-brakes state of things was also contributing to off-the-rails inflation (along with your standard-fare greedflation and price gouging, given the extremely convenient excuses of pandemic hardships and supply chain issues). The federal reserve whipped out interest rate hikes to try to curb this huge inflation, which is like a fire extinguisher dousing and suffocating your really-cool, actively-on-fire party where everyone else is burning but you're in the pool. And then they did this more, and then more. And the financial climate followed suit. And suddenly money was not cheap anymore, and new loans became expensive, because loans that used to compound at 2% a year are now compounding at 7 or 8% which, in the language of compounding, is a HUGE difference. A $100,000 loan at a 2% interest rate, if not repaid a single cent in 10 years, accrues to $121,899. A $100,000 loan at an 8% interest rate, if not repaid a single cent in 10 years, more than doubles to $215,892.

Now it is scary and risky to throw money at "could eventually be profitable" tech companies. Now investors are watching companies burn through their current funding and, when the companies come back asking for more, investors are tightening their coin purses instead. The bill is coming due. The free money is drying up and companies are under compounding pressure to produce a profit for their waiting investors who are now done waiting.

You get enshittification. You get quality going down and price going up. You get "now that you're a captive audience here, we're forcing ads or we're forcing subscriptions on you." Don't get me wrong, the plan was ALWAYS to monetize the users. It's just that it's come earlier than expected, with way more feet-to-the-fire than these companies were expecting. ESPECIALLY with Wall Street as the other factor in funding (public) companies, where Wall Street exhibits roughly the same temperament as a baby screaming crying upset that it's soiled its own diaper (maybe that's too mean a comparison to babies), and now companies are being put through the wringer for anything LESS than infinite growth that Wall Street demands of them.

Internal to the tech industry, you get MASSIVE wide-spread layoffs. You get an industry that used to be easy to land multiple job offers shriveling up and leaving recent graduates in a desperately awful situation where no company is hiring and the market is flooded with laid-off workers trying to get back on their feet.

Because those coin-purse-clutching investors DO love virtue-signaling efforts from companies that say "See! We're not being frivolous with your money! We only spend on the essentials." And this is true even for MASSIVE, PROFITABLE companies, because those companies' value is based on the Rich Person Feeling Graph (their stock) rather than the literal profit money. A company making a genuine gazillion dollars a year still tears through layoffs and freezes hiring and removes the free batteries from the printer room (totally not speaking from experience, surely) because the investors LOVE when you cut costs and take away employee perks. The "beer on tap, ping pong table in the common area" era of tech is drying up. And we're still unionless.

Never mind that last part.

And then in early 2023, AI (more specifically, Chat-GPT which is OpenAI's Large Language Model creation) tears its way into the tech scene with a meteor's amount of momentum. Here's Microsoft's prize pig, which it invested heavily in and is galivanting around the pig-show with, to the desperate jealousy and rapture of every other tech company and investor wishing it had that pig. And for the first time since the interest rate hikes, investors have dollar signs in their eyes, both venture capital and Wall Street alike. They're willing to restart the hose of money (even with the new risk) because this feels big enough for them to take the risk.

Now all these companies, who were in varying stages of sweating as their bill came due, or wringing their hands as their stock prices tanked, see a single glorious gold-plated rocket up out of here, the likes of which haven't been seen since the free money days. It's their ticket to buy time, and buy investors, and say "see THIS is what will wring money forth, finally, we promise, just let us show you."

To be clear, AI is NOT profitable yet. It's a money-sink. Perhaps a money-black-hole. But everyone in the space is so wowed by it that there is a wide-spread and powerful conviction that it will become profitable and earn its keep. (Let's be real, half of that profit "potential" is the promise of automating away jobs of pesky employees who peskily cost money.) It's a tech-space industrial revolution that will automate away skilled jobs, and getting in on the ground floor is the absolute best thing you can do to get your pie slice's worth.

It's the thing that will win investors back. It's the thing that will get the investment money coming in again (or, get it second-hand if the company can be the PROVIDER of something needed for AI, which other companies with venture-back will pay handsomely for). It's the thing companies are terrified of missing out on, lest it leave them utterly irrelevant in a future where not having AI-integration is like not having a mobile phone app for your company or not having a website.

So I guess to reiterate on my earlier point:

Drowned rats. Swimming to the one ship in sight.

#chrissy speaks #long post #-gestures broadly-

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kierstins-astrology3 · 3 months ago

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Solar Return Results from 2023-2024💟💟💟

This is a post about my past Solar return (last years) to compare events with the astrological placements from when I turned 19 to when I was about to turn 20!

Sun in 10h 5°: Focused on my career a lot and figuring out what kind of career I want to passionately pursue.

Moon in 2h 8°: Worried about my finances last year because I did not have a job but I still wanted money.

Mercury in 11h 29° : Communicated and was online a lot through tumblr, Instagram, TikTok.

Venus in 11h 27° : Also started being on dating apps more and all talking stages last year were online and met them online. Also started this astrology blog which I love doing.

Mars in 11h 11° : Created this blog again and having ambitions about possibly pursuing a career on social media or marketing. Also the planet of sex and was talking to other people this way on socials.

Jupiter in 8h 13°: Expanding my knowledge about spirituality, astrology, even getting an astrology book for my birthday and continuously writing my own astrology observations.

Saturn in 5h 5° : Had short term romances that did not work out but also got back into my creative side for example getting a sketch book for Christmas and getting back into drawing and painting.

Uranus in 8h 22°: Posted on socials with this blog on spirituality and astrology and became more serious about astrology more then ever.

Neptune in 6h 27°: Putting more creativity in my everyday routine but also having delusions about what a perfect routine for someone my age looks like.

Pluto in 4h 28°: Becoming more sentimental about my home and family also being more emotional when thinking about my family members getting older.

North Node in 7h 28° : Did not get into a serious relationship this year but I did get some college related work opportunities presented to me. Was emotional this year about not experiencing teenage and young adult love.

Chiron in 7h 19°: Heartbreaks throughout a couple of months of last year. Definitely healed me and made me a better person & realize that I cannot change anyone and if someone puts the time and effort that they will without a doubt no matter the circumstances.

Part of Fortune in 4h 14°: Luck with home and family and being more appreciative of my home and family and my family was more stable.

Vertex in 7h 29°: Didn’t get into a relationship but had some long talking stages and some school related opportunities and also with the degree being a long term fame degree probably represented the three months talking stage and the ending of a year long situationship.

Juno in 10h 20°: Was more focused on my school work as well as thinking about my future career. Definitely last year realized that I want a hardworking partner in the future and I want to be more hardworking in all areas of life.

Groom in 5h 9°: Guys that I talked to last year had been more short term and fun based. They definitely were not looking for something serious.

Ascendant: Libra 11°: Definitely felt more beautiful and even got some compliments on my appearance saying that I looked beautiful/ younger.

Descendant: Aries 11°: In terms of a relationship I wanted one so bad and passionately but I was also not feeling the connections I was in and was being cold / detached. I also realized that I am attracted to more Martian qualities in men but not women.

MC: Cancer 12°: Definitely wanted a career where I can help others open up emotionally and also practice spirituality. Also my reputation to others that I was more sensitive and focusing on astrology.

Mercury Conjunct Venus in Leo 11h: Being online and also loving being online. Loved communicating with people online and was open to having a long distance relationship.

Saturn Conjunct Asteroid Groom Pisces 5h: Some obstacles creatively when talking to potential partners and I would go back and forth because I didn’t want to lose myself and my new found creativity.

#astrology #astro community #astro notes #solar return

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bagopucks · 2 years ago

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J. Hughes - It’s Out There

✄————————————

Jack Hughes x Reader

Requested✨

Word Count: 5.1k

Warnings: a bit of ass grabbing💕, talk of ED, general angst (not proofread)

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The horror stories weren’t exactly true, but they also weren’t far off. College is what one makes of it. That I learned early on. I kept up with the work, I built a steady routine, I put forth my best effort. Things so far had been fine. I had enough time for my major and my life.

Taylor on the other hand.. she wanted to party. I loved her. I truly did, but sometimes her complaining stressed me out. We were roommates, and I always offered my best advice and a helping hand when she needed it. But she never put forth her own effort. Jack often heard about her when I needed time to complain.

Today though, I had gotten her to sit down with me and study. I promised breaks here and there, and even a late dinner. We’d both missed out on lunch for finals, neither of us were exactly hungry considering the stress. We were in need of food. But more importantly, we were in need of better help.

I managed well with our other classes we had together. I let her copy my notes and we discussed and reviewed, but when it came to math, we were both scattered.

So we decided to take a brief break.

I leaned back against the wall, sitting on my bed, while Taylor mirrored me from her own bed. I texted Jack, while she no doubt scrolled through social media.

I enjoyed the silence. Not interrupted or broken by anything but the quiet flow of air through the AC in the room. Occasionally Taylor would send me something on Instagram, and our silence shifted into both of us scrolling through our social media apps and sending each other things.

I sent her a video of a French bulldog, I received a post in return that I couldn’t quite make out from the small notification. So I opened it.

“Jack Hughes Finally Off The Market?”

It wasn’t anything more than one of those meme pages, but the photo of Jack and I kissing at his favorite cafe in the city- that was what caught me off guard. I felt my stomach turn, my entire being feeling like it fell through the floor.

It had been pitch black that night. Nobody had even been on that street when we came out. How did somebody get a photo?

“Tay,” I glanced at the likes. There were enough to make me nauseous. I decided to check the comments, hopeful that perhaps somebody would point out how it was a joke. I knew that was unlikely though.

“Where’d you find this?” Fear gripped my heart as I read through comments.

‘Can’t see her face :|’

‘Great content bud’

‘Fuck her’

‘Don’t worry guys, it’s me’

‘Hands couldn’t even fit around that ass’

‘I’ll bet she’s pretty’

A different degree of reactions all around. My gaze remained on some longer than others.

“Just on Instagram. Since you started dating Jack I just.. I don’t know, guess I started keeping up with the hockey stuff.”

Taylor looked up at me, and I looked up at her. I was pale, she looked careless.

“Hun.. I wouldn’t worry. It’s a meme page. Nobody takes their stuff seriously.”

Taylor had a point, but at the end of the day.. that was still a photo of me and Jack. Whether people believed it or not, to me, that was very clearly, me and Jack.

“Why don’t we skip the next break and get back to studying.. okay?”

I was reluctant to agree, but Taylor eventually pried my attention away from my phone. Or at least she thought she did.

The rest of our night was spent studying. We had gone out to grab something to eat from the nearest fast food place, and ate together watching the hockey team of my hometown city play. The Devils didn’t have a game scheduled for a few days, so I took it as an opportunity to check up on my other team of interest.

After the hockey game, we had both called it a night. With the lights out, and the only sound being the occasional thump of footsteps or somebody in a room around us, my mind wandered. It wandered to the point that I had grabbed my phone again to check for any news.

Nothing.

The internet still seemed oblivious.

I went back to the post to look at it. There were more comments and likes, but nobody had considered it a real possibility yet.

I spent hours awake, staring at the screen, turning it off only to give in and turn it back on, waiting for my entire world to crumble around me.

I fell asleep somewhere around four am.

When I woke up, I forced myself away from my phone to focus on my last final. I told Jack that I would visit him after it was completed and I was off for spring break. I had that to look forward to, but every time I thought of Jack, I thought of that post. So I pushed it to the back of my mind as I entered my professor’s classroom and set my phone by others on the front desk.

I’d attest to the fact that my mind wandered a few times, but I would also say I thought the exam went well. Taylor promised to meet me in the mess hall when we were both done.

I stepped out of the classroom and flipped my phone in my hand. With spring break beginning officially for me, I only had one other thing to stress about.

Opening my Instagram was like stepping into a whole new world. I followed the Devils, the NHL page, ESPN, and a few others. Mostly just for news on Jack when it came out. But this time, the news about Jack made me sick.

I slowed to a halt in the hallway, before my body went into autopilot.

The first post in front of me was the New Jersey Devil holding a bottle of champagne in a photo. The caption was a mess of words in my head. A congratulations.. with my account tagged.

I forced myself to lower my phone as I jogged through the halls and out the first exit I found.

When I got outside, my pace slowed, and I lifted my phone again.

I opened the Devils story first. Another congratulations post to Jack.. and me. My name. Next to Jack’s. Something the media team was no doubt doing to try and poke fun at the situation. It was all in good fun for them. I could understand, but at the same time it made me want to throw up. They hadn’t even spoken to Jack or me. They didn’t even ask if we wanted to remain private. Instead they simply confirmed everything. As the story played through, the next one for the NHL opened. It was a repost, with a message that said, ‘welcome to the NHL WAGS FAM.’ With my account tagged.

I could not imagine the page doing it for another player, but this was Jack Hughes. This was one of their most followed guys in the league. They’d cover every moment of his life if it meant more money and a bigger following.

ESPN had a more formal address on the topic, but it was still about Jack and I nonetheless.

I blacked out. I blacked out so hard that I barely even noticed I was in my dorm until I heard the door click shut behind me. Panic was the only thing I had really felt before. Until I looked at the posts. The posts, then the comments.

There were a select few who congratulated, but the majority? The huge crowds? They hated me. It made a sense of dread bubble up in my throat, until a quiet cry escaped. Girls insulted me in every photo posted, guys asked why Jack went after me, some even said I was nothing but a distraction. People made fun of me for being a secret, they tore me down for not setting my life aside to follow him and his hockey dreams.

How did they even know about my life so quickly? How did they know where I went to college?

I made a split second decision. I grabbed a duffel bag from my closet and began to throw clothing inside. I was certain that I had forgotten things along the way, but there was nothing a quick visit to the convenience store couldn’t fix. I put my laptop in the bag, as well as various chargers I hadn’t bothered to ravel up.

I was panicked, and the one person I wanted to see was an hour away. Taylor called me a few times while my phone laid on my bed, but I hadn’t called her back until I was out of my dorm room and headed for the car.

“Hey! We were supposed to meet up.” Taylor’s voice called through the phone. I sniffed quietly. I hadn’t begun crying yet, but my nose was running nonetheless.

“I have to go into New Jersey early.” I spoke through a shaky voice. I tossed my bag into the back seat of my car before climbing into the front. I was quick to turn the vehicle on, and Taylor’s voice cut out as my phone Bluetooth connected to the car.

“Is it bec- of that post?”

“Jack and I are out. All of the sports media has confirmed it. Tay, I don’t know what to do.” I backed out of my spot before I tore out of the parking lot.

“It’s gonna be okay. I’m sure Jack will have it handled.”

“Jack?” I asked. Incredulous. “I love Jack, but I highly doubt he’ll have any of this shit handled.” He’d never been through it before. We were both amateurs at this, and now we were sinking together. I needed him. I assumed he needed me.

“Okay well.. I’m sure everybody’s happy for you guys.. yeah?”

“No! No, they’re not! They keep commenting on how shitty I am! And in that post last night, everybody was all over my ass! My ass!” My loss and hopelessness caused me to get choked up.

I’d always had a rough relationship with food ever since I was a teenager. People told me I was too skinny or too big. People told me that being insecure because I was skinny didn’t count. They invalidated my feelings while at the same time telling me my ass wasn’t big enough, or my cup size was awfully small. Then others would come back and say my ass was too big or my boobs might be distracting.

Depending on the comments, some days I ate, others I did not.

When I met Jack, I was healthier than before, but I still struggled. He always reassured me. Told me I was beautiful. That he loved me, thought I was perfect, and that gaining or losing a couple pounds meant nothing as long as I was healthy.

He made me feel safe eating huge greasy burgers and shoveling cake into my mouth on a Friday movie night. Likewise, he validated my feelings when all I wanted was a chicken salad and maybe a piece of bread or two. He always said, ‘as long as you’re healthy.’ And every once in a while he made sure I wasn’t hungry either. Especially after I ate salads. After he’d seen me put away pretty nice sized meals, he always made sure I had enough to eat. And that I was comfort able enough to eat.

It was amazing how a few social media comments could tear down so many walls I’d built, but it was deeper than that to me. These were Jack’s fans. If they didn’t like me, then why should he? Had he been lying to me all this time?

“Your beautiful ass?” Taylor tried to make a joke. A tear finally fell down my cheek.

“What if Jack hates me?” My bottom lip quivered. “He hasn’t reached out.. what if he’s breaking up with me?” The mere thought made me want to pull over and turn around.

“What is he doing today?” Taylor asked expectantly. I had to think about it.

“Media stuff?” The thought brought a moment of relief to my lungs.

“Exactly. You’ve had days before where he doesn’t text until late in the evening and it’s never bothered you.” Taylor’s voice gave me the encouragement to continue on.

“I know this didn’t happen in time like you guys planned it, but it’s all going to be fine. The crazy fan girls will always be mean, but people are going to get over it.”

“Yeah.. but what if they hate me forever?”

“They might. But oh well, right?”

Taylor was right. But that still didn’t make me feel any better. I gripped the steering wheel tighter.

“When does Jack get home?”

“I think.. I don’t know? Maybe around three?” I breathed out a sigh.

“So you’ll be there before him?”

“Yeah?”

“Why don’t you go see him at the arena?”

“And bother him? After all this?”

“If it’s a media day, you know he won’t be that busy. And it’s better than torturing yourself at his place for hours.”

She was right.

“I’ll have to think about it..”

“Don’t think too much.”

As if I hadn’t been overthinking everything that day already. Our conversation ended with mutual good lucks, and the familiar monotone beep of a dead line. I sighed, wiped the tears from my cheeks, and focused on the road ahead.

My hour in the car was spent flipping through radio stations, trying to find music that was loud enough to distract me or soft enough to calm me. Nothing worked. My jaw was clenched most if not the entire time. My face hurt. My cheeks hurt. My fingers felt stiff every time I pulled a hand from the wheel.

And entering Jersey didn’t help. It felt like a smack upside the head. A loud call back to my horrible reality. I felt like everybody outside the car was staring in. Everybody knew who I was. Everybody hated me. They were all looking at my body.

By the time I had pulled into Jack’s own apartment community, I felt like I was suffocating trying to choke back tears. I parked in the lot outside of his complex. I gave it five minutes. Then another five. Then another five.

I grabbed my phone and opened TikTok this time. I typed Jack’s name into the search and hit enter. The first video eased my mind. Somebody saying how beautiful I was.. how happy they were for Jack.

The next broke my heart. Comparing me to the first girl. To the hot girl. The skinny girl. The perfect girl. I’d seen videos here and there before of people saying how they thought Jack and his ex had been such a beautiful couple. People said they ‘missed’ her. Like they ‘knew’ her. I never let it cut too deep, because they didn’t know I existed.

Now it was blatant. Now they said things like that, because she was better than me.

I put my car in reverse.

Taylor was right. I’d torture myself if I didn’t see Jack.

Closing the distance between myself and the arena was like beating a new nail into my coffin with each mile. It only stressed me out more. But I hoped Jack would take it all off my shoulders. If he had time.

The thought that he’d be too busy also occurred to me, but even being in the same building as him, I decided, would be soothing.

I had pulled into the private parking area before climbing out of my car. My face was red, but I had since stopped the tears. My heart was set on Jack. Nothing else could distract me.

I walked through the double doors at the bottom, stepping right into one of the many entrances. I was quick to find the hall that led to the private facilities. I walked past maintenance closets, and equipment rooms, before my swift pace was brought to an abrupt halt by a body stepping out of the lounge.

I gasped. He grabbed me by the shoulders. When I looked up, my eyes caught Jesper. His gaze softened from surprise to sympathy. We stared at each other, both uncertain of what to say. He spoke first.

“Jack was worried when you didn’t text him that your final was over.” He spoke, as if having an ‘A-ha’ moment. He let me go. I reached to rub my eyes again, fearful that something was still there.

“He didn’t text me all day.” I countered.

“Well.. he didn’t want to distract you. They won’t stop asking him about you.” My brow furrowed in question.

“He’s in with reporters right now.” Jesper gestured down the hall. I assumed he meant Jack was in the locker room. “They won’t let you go.” Tears welled up in my eyes again.

“We can wait for him together?” I nodded.

Jesper walked me into the lounge and grabbed me a bottle of water.

“I was shocked when it came out.. I know you and Jack were trying really hard not to be public.” Jesper sat down on the couch, and patted the empty cushion next to him. I sat beside him as he handed me the bottle of water.

“I shouldn’t have kissed him that night we went out.” I breathed out, shaking my head. I unscrewed the bottle cap and took a sip of the liquid. It helped refresh my dry throat.

“Can’t limit your happiness to closed doors.” Jesper had a point, but if I had limited my happiness to closed doors, I wouldn’t be miserable right now.

“Bratter?” My head shot in the direction of the door at the sound of a Swiss accent. I raised a brow at Nico in the doorway, dressed in a sweater covered in a colorful floral pattern. Nico looked right back at me, staring me down with that, ‘stays between us’ kind of expression.

“What the hell are they making you do in there?” Jesper asked, slinging an arm over the back of the couch.

“Some spring skit.. I don’t know. I acted really bad so they wouldn’t use me for it.” Nico quickly peeled the sweater off. “Your turn.” He stepped into the room and tossed the sweater at Jesper.

The blonde looked rather displeased, but he swiftly grabbed the sweater and stood up.

“You sit with her and wait for Jack then.. okay?” Nico and Jesper exchanged looks before the Swiss man nodded, then the Swede left the room.

“So,” Nico turned back to me. He fixed his hair, pursing his lips. “Jack’s pretty tense.” He plopped down on the couch next to me, my body jolting slightly at the way the sofa bounced. “How are you feeling?”

“Like shit, Nico.” I glared at him. He was trying his best.

“Right… everything’ll iron out.” He pulled his phone from his pocket. “You wanna play chess while we wait?” I glared at him once again. How could a man so thoughtful like Nico be so… lost when it came to this stuff? Because he’s been single for far too long. Jack always tried setting him up, but Nico was never interested. Said there were too many cultural differences.

“I have air hockey on here too.” He gave me that dumb lopsided smile. That smile that I always rolled my eyes at. Now I just wanted to wipe it off his face and tell him he was no help. But I gave in. I needed a distraction. I pulled my legs up onto the couch and turned my body to face Nico. He opened the game and set his phone down between us.

He started the game. I was better than him at it.

“People being mean to you?”

“You have no idea.”

“I checked some of the comments on the Devils post.” I glanced up at him before looking back down at the phone.

“It’s not good.” I shrugged.

“People make fun of my eyebrows sometimes.” I looked back up at him. Nico looked sincere, yet his eyes were still focused on the phone. I had to look back down. If he scored, it would only interrupt the flow of our conversation.

“Kids used to do it a lot in school. I used to ask my sister to fix them for me.” Somehow, the idea of a tiny Nico asking to have his brows waxed was amusing, but I held in my laughter for the sake of his ego. “Kids called me angry birds. I didn’t know what it meant for the longest time. But I knew I just hated my eyebrows.”

I wasn’t sure where he was going with this, but it felt great to be understood nonetheless.

“Now everybody’s calling you a bunch of things, and I know it’s hard. But I’d suggest listening to what the people who love you say. They know better than anybody else.”

I scored on Nico. We both looked up at each other, and I offered him a sad smile.

“Means the world to hear, Nic. Sorry for calling you the Eagle from the muppets.”

His brows knit together in confusion. But I didn’t have time to explain the subtle joke before we both heard quiet complaining in the hall. Jack’s ever gentle voice laced with tension and stress. Maybe even shaking.

“Where’s Nico?”

“God- I just wanna talk to Nico!”

I quickly stood up and took the bottle of water with me as I stepped out into the hall. Jack was gone. My gaze flickered about until he emerged from a room, he must have been on a pretty aggressive hunt for his captain. Jack stopped though when he spotted me. The emotions returned. He looked as stressed as I’d felt before. Now I only felt overwhelmed and sad.

“Babe?” Jack slowly made his way down the hall to meet me by the lounge door. He was gentle when he pulled me into a hug, dipping his head to rest against my shoulder while I wrapped my arms around his neck, careful not to spill my water.

“It’s all gone to shit.” I whispered.

“I’m so sorry..” Jack mumbled in response. Neither of us could have been prepared for this. And it wasn’t either of our faults.

“Jack don’t apologize.” I pulled back, feeling the familiar sting of tears in my eyes.

“I’m done for the day.. I got done early. Let’s just go home.. please.” He sounded as desperate to get out of there as I was to get to him. I nodded.

——————

Jack drove us back to his apartment. I didn’t care enough about my car to be away from him for too long, but I had grabbed my bag. He let me inside before himself, but we never left each other’s eyesight. The second Jack pushed the door shut, his arms were around me. I reached a hand up to hold the back of his head, my other hand resting overtop of his own that lay on my stomach.

“They asked me so many things about you.” Jack mumbled.

“Jack.. baby.. you don’t think..” was now even the time to bring it up? I sighed. “I’m not too big for you.. am I? Or too small? Or too anything?”

Jack pressed a kiss to my shoulder.

“You’re just right. You always have been. Always will be.” He slowly pulled away to walk around in front of me. “Are they saying stuff about your body?” He looked so disgusted by the fact, but Jack was more worldly innocent than one might assume. He never wanted to expect the worst from others.

“I guess so..” I shrugged, rubbing one of my arms. My body language said enough. He could always tell when I was uncomfortable.

“You shouldn’t look.” Jack reached out to rest his hands on my upper arms.

“I know that, Jack. I just- I guess I just wanted them to like me.” I looked down.

“Hey, hey.” Jack moved one of his hands to rest his fingers beneath my chin, tilting my head up. “They will. They’re gonna love you.” His brow furrowed as his eyes searched for my own. But I still couldn’t be bothered to make eye contact. “Babe.. babe look at me.” He wasn’t demanding. He was gentle. Encouraging. He was always so kind to me. Even his behavior in this moment brought tears to my eyes. I looked at him though, and I watched his heart break in slow motion. I watched his eyes grow solemn.

“It’ll just take time. Just give it time.” Jack pulled me into another hug, his arms wrapped tightly around my body as one hand laid between my shoulder blades and the other pressed into the small of my back. I buried my face in his chest. I wanted nothing more than to go back to the day before, when nobody knew about me. When I was just me.. just a university student.

“Jack,” I whispered into his chest. I slowly lifted my head. He looked down at me. His expression showed nothing but devotion. He was ready to pull the stars from the sky if I said the word. “We’ll be with each other through this.. right?”

“Stay with me through spring break…” the offer was a surprise, but one I wasn’t opposed to. We both needed each other, and time away from my college campus was never a bad thing.

“I think I can do that.” I sniffled as I slipped my hands between our bodies, resting them on his chest. Being in his arms was the most comforting thing in the world. Going through this whole ordeal seemed a lot less stressful when I knew it would be spent with him.

“I love you.” Jack whispered, a grin forming on his lips as his hands wandered to my hips, only to eventually find my backside. I jumped at the feeling. “I want you to love yourself too. Please don’t let people convince you you’re not perfect.” Jack’s words were easier said than done.

“I wish you’d just see yourself the way I saw you.. god you’re such an Angel to me.” He pressed a kiss to my head. My heart fluttered as my temperature rose. “They’ll see you that way one day too.” Those promises were debatable, but believing them made me relax. Maybe if I just lived in Jack’s world for a little while.. his positive reality, it would be better in the long run.

Despite the fact that we still had hours left in the day, neither of us seemed too interested in going anywhere or doing anything. Jack and I ended up in bed together. We both had the bare minimum on.. bodies mark-less but heads full of love. I could still feel Jack’s lips pressed against each of my insecurities, and his hands massaging circles into my muscles. Likewise I swore I could still feel his skin beneath my hands. His silky hair between my fingers. Every dip and curve of his muscles committed to memory.

Jack kept me away from my phone in the most effective way.

Moments ago, lips had trailed my shoulders and my arms, down my chest and around my stomach and sides. He’d put the work in on my thighs too, so gentle and sweet. He never left a mark. It wasn’t that kind of night. His kisses were passionate, but not lustful. He was so full of love.. so heartfelt in each of his movements. Jack was one of a kind.

I laid, curled into his side, my head resting in the space between his arm and his chest, just beneath his shoulder.

“Ya know.. I saw a girl today say she missed your ex.” I spoke quietly, afraid to disturb the peace. But it was on my mind nonetheless.

Jack tensed. He shuffled, then picked his head up to look down at me.

“I don’t.” He scoffed. “She was horrible.”

I turned my head to look at him, but Jack rested his head against the pillow again before I could see his eyes.

“What was she like?”

“Nothing like you. She came around at a busy time.. right after the draft. I was too distracted to really pay attention to all the red flags. She was mean.”

“Does it bother you when people say they miss her?”

“It would if there was something to miss.” Jack moved his shoulders to shrug before halting when he realized my head was there. “It would be a different story If it was you.”

“What?”

“If it was you.. I’d miss you too. I was so worried you’d back out when you saw everything today. I didn’t want to lose you.. but by the time I could speak to anybody, our whole social team just put it out there.” Jack slowly turned onto his side, my head fell to the bed. He wrapped his arm around me and I quickly turned to mirror him.

“I would never leave over something like this. You mean too much to me.”

“I’m glad we’re on the same page then.” The sound of my phone ringing from the floor had me slowly turning to get up, but I only got my back turned to Jack before he pulled me against his chest. I yelped out a laugh.

“Jack.” I reached to pry his hand from my stomach.

“No phones.. please?” I sighed. The chances of somebody actually needing me were slim, so I let the call go unanswered.

“Alright. You win baby.” I carefully rolled over, pulling his hand from my body and pressing a kiss to his knuckles. Jack smiled. He loved a lot of things, but being pampered was one of his favorites. I pressed another kiss to the back of his hand, then one to his wrist, before playfully biting and kissing all the way up his arm. Kissing him everywhere just like he’d done to me before. Jack broke into a fit of giggles by the time I reached his forearm. After I got to his shoulder, I raised my lips to his own, pressing a much deeper kiss there to silence him.

When I pulled away, Jack’s baby blues eyed me. I kissed his jaw. “God.. they’re gonna love you so much.” He whispered, shaking his head. Astounded.

“They just don’t know you yet.. but they will.”

“As long as they don’t love me more than you do.”

“Nobody can love you more than I do.”

✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾

#nhl imagine #nhl x reader #jack hughes #jack hughes x reader #jack hughes imagine #nhl hockey #nico hischier #jesper bratt

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colebabey888 · 1 month ago

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1,000??..

1K+ followers, urg cute! thank you for the support, you guys make it so fun to be a girlbloggerrr

a few months ago, I hadn't even been active on Tumblr nor Pinterest. now I have over a thousand followers and more than 3 million views across both platforms combined and this is just the beginning for colebabey8.88. im so excited for all the new creative ideas i will spark up for you guys in the future. more it girl diaries, more fashion, more wellness, who knows, colebabey8.88 is always evolving! it's so fun though like i'm hoping from one app to the other and just making my blueprint there haha ..

one of the best things about this, is that I'm now making money on both sites too. because of so many negative perceptions on earning an income through digital marketing or social media, i never really pondered on being a girlblogger, the idea of being able to enjoy something and make a substantial income from it was just crazy! , but after spilling all my crazy thoughts, beauty secrets and fashion rants into mini paragraphs, sharing them with random strangers just for fun, i don't know i kind of like it here haha. ( im still getting my degree, being rich and dumb isn't a good look ), but anyways, i was a brokeyyy, draining myself in school and depending on my parents financially. i took a chance at doing something i love and enjoy and now i have my own money coming in from different places in different ways. crazy ! you really do create your own reality, i saw an opportunity and took it! but honestly, it's fascinating to observe the potential of social media when approached with seriousness, consistency, and discipline.

Interested in replicating this success by the means of social media monetization?, I'd be happy to share my strategies and insights.

first download the M3 Ebook for free ( while this guide primarily focuses on Pinterest growth and monetization strategies, many of the principles can be effectively applied across various social media platforms of your choice. )

once you feel like you've mastered the M3 Guide, consider acquiring The Digital Dollar resource. In this guide I give insight on diverse methods I took in the beginning for generating multiple passive income streams, whether it be affiliate marketing, creating digital products, starting an online brand or even blogging!

and remember, if you have any questions, my inbox is always open, don't be shy !

mwah! xoxo, colebabey8.88

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trans-femme-fag-dyke · 1 month ago

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T4T sEggs Cracking

Sex changes when you transition as a t-girl. New realities come into focus. New turn-ons emerge. A world of novel psychological and physiological experiences are added to the mix, or replace it entirely. Hormones and their impact terraform the ecology into a mycelial divine feminine, replete with new pleasure pathways. In short, it is wild and beautiful, feral and oozing with potential.

What I wasn’t prepared for, though, was how transfiguring the experience of T4T sex would be. Not by a mile.

Degrading Glorification

(What follows is a dual narrative, embellished and made whole by my lover’s own description of our tryst, which may I tell you is really fucking hot. Anyone who finds discovery and meaning in the process of writing has my attention and, most likely, my lust).

Just another day on Grindr receiving unsolicited dick pic after dick pic from people who ignore my profile’s clear insistence on T4T only.

While I don’t avail myself of these opportunities, there is something to be said for the euphoria that comes from being seen by cishets as a girl. Even seeing me as an attractive t-girl, if they’re purely fetishizing that tribal identifier, doesn’t hurt. Having spent too many years in the closet as a boy-modular gay, I am immune to the aggression of those advances and treat it more like a research project, tagging each new appendage into its relevant mental taxonomy: thick, thin, black, white, clean, cum-covered, veiny, etc. Back in the day, these advances were perfectly acceptable — direct, to the point, like the hawking of wares in a saturated meat market. I was less interested in what they were attached to as I was in their function. Emotion and personality were cast aside.

As a t-girl, though, there is a crossing of the privilege divide into an East Berlin of fear and insecurity. Too often, and too unpublicized, are the examples of anti-trans violence that it’s simply not the same fuck economy that it used to be. And anyway, my orientation has changed.

Orientation shift in transition is a topic that could command an entire thesis, so I won’t go into it here. Suffice it to say that almost overnight, as the estrogen moved through my body, I lost my interest in gay or straight men. Perhaps because being with a gay guy, although still on the table before secondary sex characteristics set in and I could stealthily navigate those penetrations, would send a dysphoric signal deep into my programming.

I find myself attracted to trans energy mostly.

Grindr is a numbers game in Los Angeles. There’s so much flakiness you become accustomed to being ignored or conversations end abruptly. Not to mention that hooking up here is so governed by travel times which fluctuate wildly throughout the days asymmetrical commuting times, that the whole affair can be a non-started at the outset.

But she responded. Glorious brunette, with long wavy hair, small pursed lips and an aloofness that immediately activated my pathological desire of the emotionally unavailable. What can I say, my mother fucked me up.

She — let’s call her Adeline — lived about 10 minutes away, so in an abundance of well-heeled politeness cut with impatient lust, I went to pick her up.

Cue the usual slightly coy banter as we both worked each other out during the ride. The dissipation of fear which comes with these Grindr “dates” for traps, which always carry a soupçon of terror to them and see us scrambling to etch a last will and testament into our iPhone notes app and share location with friends as it plays out.

I emerged from the bathroom topless.

Oh fuck, she thought, nipple piercings. The most physical symbol of deviance there is.

We started making out on the sofa and immediately some force took a hold of me. I felt like our bodies were fusing inside a blacksmith’s forge. We were glitching like a hacked mainframe, opening up its secrets to Snowden’s deft digital lock-picking. We were like people who hadn’t eaten in days set loose on a Vegas buffet.

I ran my hands over her back and through her hair, interlocking my teeth around her neck and ears. Almost epileptic in spasms of uncontrollable, uncensored I searched for my frontal cortex and managed to articulate that we should move to the bedroom.

My friend S had told me to expect fireworks in my first T4T experience. Their look of both shock and empathetic excitement registered on their FaceTime framed face.

They hinted at the dynamic’s incendiary force with an elliptical smile, leaving me hanging like a teaser trailer.

“I can’t explain it, but there’s just something to that energy, that vibe. I’m so excited for you. Like fucking excited!”

And Jesus fucking christ, they were right. I can see why they held off on the detail. Language fails.

We made our way to the bedroom where I revealed my kink drawer. There’s a cornucopia of debauchery in this unassuming pine wood piece of furniture: masks, paddles, leashes, collars, nipple clamps and floggers.

We negotiated our limits, settling on consensual non-consent. In short, anything goes.

We couldn’t have been more perfectly matched. When she initially shared photos with me on the app she gave a trigger warning around the bruises I’d see. It just so happened that impact play and relishing in the blues, browns, yellows and purples of corporeal graffiti aftermath was something we shared.

“I don’t care if you draw blood,” I assured her.

“Well ok then, you pathetic little slut,” she hissed, “lay the fuck down.”

I hadn’t fully anticipated how rapidly she would turn on the sadistic domme energy and I didn’t question it. I couldn’t.

Mmmmmmmmm, mama’s hungry, I thought as my crotch began to throb.

I don’t need to pull my punches, she thought, I can really indulge this deeper cruelty in me.

“Yes, mistress!” I responded, getting into role as the slut spit dump I’d soon become.

I lay down.

“Open wide, slut,” she ordered as she spat on my face, all the while positioning her mouth over mine and dribbling long translucent threads of drool onto my tongue and down my throat. She lunged for my neck with lupine grace and hunger, digging her teeth in and unleashing eddies of dopamine and oxytocin. I could feel the fledgling bruises on my neck and knew they’d be difficult to hide but at this point she could have pushed a blade into my lungs and I’d have kissed her while the blood bubbled out of my mouth.

These were feelings I had never felt before.

It was like all my shame, low self-esteem, trauma, alienation, anxiety and isolation channeled a lightning strike turning sand into clear shards of luminescent glass.

It felt both individual and collective, all ruptures and salvation of minority stressed gender fuckery, raining down and being soaked up. An effervescent tribal alchemy of ecstatic release.

The power of consensual degradation cannot be underestimated. I took years of being trodden down by things beyond my control. The abuse of my mother, the deprivation of affection, the laundering of all currencies of love through a front of cold calculation. All of this turned to steam through the act of my submitting to it with someone who also made me vibrate with light. All of those times when I had no fucking say in what happened to me, as humanity depriving as it was and violently unfair, I now took back. I resignified it, reclaimed it, decolonized and liberated it.

She attached the leash to my collar and yanked me onto the floor.

“If you’re a good girl, you’ll get a treat.” She said sternly, with the consummate control of a well-etched domme.

Up until now, she’d only really experimented with this role but now, she leapt up into the saddle ready for battle. From where I crouched, lapping up her girl dick with such an eagerness to please, it felt like she’d been doing this all her life.

In the dawn of her 20s, this girl came with a level of sexual confidence and experience that can only be found in trans circles. It’s like our bodies are always searching for each other with odyssean ardor. Simultaneous electrons suspended in tandem states.

I clambered back onto the bed like a dog and she straddled me, our girl dicks entwined in her hand with a vibrator in between. Edging, foreplay, the beautiful mirage of the female orgasm which rises and falls, ebbs and flows, coming into focus then going blurry as the mind and the body speaks in foreign tongues.

It was the kind of sex you never want to end. Constant punishment, submission, bratty deliberate misbehavior, retaliation, good behavior and treats.

“You told me you were going to cum you fucking whore. Well, are you?!” she cursed.

“Fuck my pussy, mistress. I need something in me so I can cum for you.”

One, two, then three fingers entered me as she celebrated my gaping hole.

“I love how loose you are.”

Ugh, I felt so seen. I’ve been trying to make my ass loose for years. It’s been one of my sexual north stars. I want to be able to get entire cities inside me. Until my neo-puzzy arrives, my ass has been my pussy substitute and I’ve wanted her to stretch until my bud becomes labia and turns from circle into that canal like corridor of floral ingress.

It didn’t take long, with my ass full of her hand, and I reached that liquidless trap climax and lay there panting, dripping in spit, sweat, and a sense of sexed gender euphoria I had waited 39 years to feel.

Who knew that in order to feel my most beautiful, it would take this level of degradation.

We languished, dripping in sweat and overtaken by an exhaustion which was held in abeyance by the relentless motor of sex.

“Well, I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait to do that again,” I said, with the last remaining energy and breath left in me.

“We might not be able to. I’m probably moving to Berlin in a few weeks,” she responded with a signature level of matter-of-factness and regret.

Afterword

This is a post from Threads that resonated with me.

@aspirationaltea I think this post is me realizing T4T lesbian is the full explanation of my sexuality at least?

That’s how I walked away from the experience with Adeline. Literally and figuratively changed forever. In one fell swoop a single lover had the power to make me feel seen for the first time in my life.

Now of course any first time has the potential to carry the hyperbole of its impact. But the water that slacks the thirst of the desert stranded is the exact same water we all drink. The difference, however, is life saving.

I would usually chalk up an experience without more penetration as fun but not fulfilling. In this scene I had a few fingers inside me for a few minutes. And yet I lost all sense of time and place, sinking into the experience like feet in clittoral sand.

It was pure T4T lesbian sex, as much connection, edging and build as it was a wham bam teleology. The purpose was communion and connection.

T4T sex transfigures and transubstantiates the entire experience into a physical act. Inside every bite, kiss, spit, yank, finger and curse, was a microcosm of the entire experience of trans identity. Eucharist anointed trap fantasy.

Our shared struggles, estrogen shortages, dirty glances turned our way, rejections. Our alignments, the joyful tears t-girls shed over the smallest things as their emotional synapses reinitiate, our first sports bra. Everything is there, unspoken but enacted ritualistically like the world is burning all around us and we carry on regardless. Which is, alas, what it feels like a lot of the time.

At the core of the experience was the abiding sense of safety which comes from being intimate with someone who knows how important it is to cultivate that in as many spaces, few though they may be, as possible.

In addition, the dimension of kink/BDSM brings its own magnetic locus of individuation and resignification. We find submission, abjectification, degradation, and pain paired up with consent, control, compassion, negotiation, communication, and transcendence. We recontextualize experiences which in every other life domain are precursors or consequences of socially aberrant behavior or undesirable hierarchical role playing.

Whether the sub is in control or the dom is, just as with tops and bottoms, is a question for the ages. The person under the thumb, in so allowing it, arguably possesses some power over the person they artificially and consensually elevate to that position. When you have nothing to lose because you have relinquished it, you can only be net positive existentially.

The point is the horizontal socialism of the trans lesbian experience. No one person controls. All are equal and the roleplay is merely an enactment of the end of dominion by external forces.

For what baits the enemy like getting back on your feet or smiling in their face? As blood streams out of your nostrils and you turn to face your captor ready for another beating, you demonstrate an unwavering faith in the ultimate form of the Golden Rule: if your enemy strikes you, turn the other cheek and ask, “Have I been a good girl, Mistress?”

#trans nsft #transfem #t4t nsft #t4t

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breelandwalker · 8 months ago

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Willow Wings Witch Shop - March 2024 Newsletter

March is here, the spring equinox approaches, and as the weather changes, new opportunities and new growth begin to emerge. It’s a time for greening, a time for awakening, and a time to set our plans in motion for the coming season.

This month’s theme is Luck Magic.

Whether you’re looking to turn around a run of poor fortune, give your finances a boost, or sway probability in your favor, luck magic can take many forms. Check out the gallery below to see some of the options available in the shop and don't miss our newest arrival - Lucky Day Powder!

(Make sure you sign up for the email list to get monthly discount codes!)

Featured Products:

Upcoming Events:

Haunted Witch Market Sunday, Mar 24 2024, 6pm-10pm Diversity Richmond 1407 Sherwood Ave, Richmond VA Hosted by River City Witch Markets

This month on Hex Positive:

Ep. 044 - THE LAST WITCH with Annika Hylmö, Ph.D. Bree welcomes writer/director Annika Hylmö into the virtual studio to discuss the forthcoming documentary, THE LAST WITCH. This poignant story tells the tale of some very determined Massachusetts middle-schoolers and their campaign to secure exoneration for the last unpardoned victim of the Salem witch trials, Elizabeth Johnson Jr. Make sure you're following on your favorite podcast app!

Follow me on Tumblr, Instagram, and Wordpress for the latest updates and announcements, as well as plenty of tips for growing your craft and building your skills.

Happy Witching! 🍀

#witchcraft #witchblr #witch community #witch shop #luck magic #luck spells #money spells #witchy things

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umitsy · 3 months ago

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warnings: love obsession, mentions of blood and weapons, invading reader's privacy

reader's g/n

A side character on an otome game that is about a kinda apocalypse going on in the world.

You obviously get choices every now and then, but you have to be extra careful because you could die with any wrong answer (even with some dialogues you may get with the love interests.)

So, this side character is one of the love interest's enemies and has to fulfill the role as a 'bully'. However, it somehow developed more code lines than any other character on the game, giving him the opportunity to be more observant than the others, have the consciousness to remember how many times you've died because you got on a bad route and so on.

The game itself has had its ending far long ago, the developers had announced there won't be sequels as they think one game has been more than enough and they feel proud with the story's ending and the high quality of the art as well. So yeah, you get to finish the whole game, unlocking each of the five possible routes—plus the deseasing and neutral ones.

You felt satisfied when you ended it and after giving yourself a break from the game for a couple of months, you missed some of the characters' lines and downloaded it once more for a 'warning' screen to pop up when you tried to log in with the account you saved your whole progress.

You panicked, of course, you've spent lots of time collecting the gems that were needed to select certain options and breaking your brain to remember the correct answers to not die.

After a couple of exchanged messages with the support team line the game had attached in case anything like that happened, you got your account back.

"You're finally back?! You went a long time to collect those groceries, you know? Were the markets that far?"—one of the love interests' lines as a comeback.

Oh yes, how you missed those dorky boys.

As you started going chapter through chapter, your phone glitched from two to three times whenever you tapped for an answer 'weird' you thought, but nothing seemed out of normal with the storyline.

When you saw your clock hit 2 a.m. you turned off your phone and went hurriedly to sleep for the next day. Little did you know a character could now think for his own and move within the basement's programmed walls for all he wanted.

You spent more nights playing, oblivious to the fact that Zander could now navigate your whole phone if he wanted, his wandering eyes codes widening collecting more and more with all he learnt about you. Getting obsessed with you and the fact that his miserable world was definitely not only that, but there was a whole new world were it seemed to be peaceful as your photos on cafés and school showed him to be like.

He wanted to be there, he wanted to be with you.

The next day's night after he decided he'd do anything to get with you, you opened the app to find a gruesome 'welcome back!' scene you'd never seen.

The love interests' blood-covered dismembered bodies were all over the basement you'd find later on the story, still—there was no sight of a zombie that could've do something like that to them, and even if there was; there were two reasons you were sure this was some kinda glitch or virus;

The love interests do not die at the end, only when you choose incorrectly but never in the basement.

Not even zombies would get them that messed up... they would bite them and may be even get some flesh out of their arms, but there were cuts that didn't seem to be caused by claws, but more like by knifes or swords.

Then you picked up on a bloody message being chaotically written in the wall behind all the chaos.

"Will you look only at me now?"

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snowbunnywatching · 1 year ago

Note

Even though Black Men will be earning the highest incomes and sit at the very top of the dating market, there'll always be pockets of white girls who'll fail to make an impression, or fail to put in the work necessary to compete with Black Women, or will just be bad at dating and bad in the bedroom. This may be a minority, but it won't be zero.

If cultural encouragement and economic incentives fail to get some girls to step up their game or put out on the first date, maybe Black Men can avoid wasting time on them with an app that lets them rate and review local white girls, similar to Uber? white girls who desperately need a push can access the app to see what their reputation is and what they need to improve, but only Black Men can review and rate.

Since the goals are to help Black Men avoid bad dates while simultaneously improving low-performing white girls (rather than brutalizing them,) the ratings will be incredibly lenient, at least at first. It's important to keep white girls in line and remind them that it's they who need to impress Black Men (rather than the other way around,) but it does no good to immediately yank them out of the dating pool for any small misstep. It's only when a white girl shows no improvement after about 5-10 bad dates/hookups that she should be worried. At that point, she might as well either try to go gay or join a nunnery, since he prospects amongst Black Men will be slim to none.

Your thoughts?? :)

What a great idea.

I'm thinking a Tinder-like dating app, but with the ability to look up profiles using their profile name. Most white girls would display their profile name on their social media pages, and it would be costumary to share it with any Black men flirting with you - and it would be a major red flag if a girl claimed not to be on the app or refused to give her profile name.

A Black man having been in the vicinity of a white girl for three hours (using GPS information from their phones) will be given the opportunity to rate and review her. And of course provide any information that other brothers will find relevant.

Are her profile pictures several years out of date? Does lighting and camera angles represent her as more attractive than she really is? Is the starfish her favorite position? Everything will be revealed.

#racial justice

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gaiuskamilah · 1 year ago

Note

why do you think that confession was "eww sex so gross porn is sinful" and not "pb is gonna keep making crappy porn books with sex every chapter bc it what makes them money instead making stories with substance"

like. have you seen the vip books.

i know this ask is rhetorical and you're not looking for an actual answer but i'm going to take this as an opportunity to vocalize all my thoughts regarding the trend anyway.

for the record, no, i don't play the smut books. i'm more interested in PB's adventure and horror books, and thus those are the ones i actually invest myself in most. if i wanted to consume porn i would look for it elsewhere because choices' smut books don't interest me for a number of reasons. i also don't play or pay for VIP. however, i know enough about the vip and smut books to know enough about them they cater to a very specific audience: older women interested in escapist, arguably "taboo" sexual fantasies who are willing and have the means to spend money on the sex stories they like.

i have no idea if anyone in this fandom has actually bothered to understand economics or even recognize that we live under a capitalist system, but the way a good number of people and career complainers take it out on the writers and how PB just "chose" to make porn never sat right with me. especially since most of these people, again, do not take into account or even vehemently refuse to consider the context and circumstances of the production behind the games. the writers have time and time again been open regarding the circumstances behind book production, and they have always mentioned that economic factors play a large part in it because they work within a capitalist market. here are some times they've spoken about it, particularly andrew in 2019 (writer for blades, bloodbound, endless summer, crimes, etc.) and kara in 2023 (TRR, TCATF):

the trend of smut and single LI books started in 2020 with the release of books like the nanny affair, queen b, and wolf bride. if you check the top 10 category on the app, TNA and WB are both in it — an indication that they do well revenue-wise. companies are driven by data and when they're successful, in kara's words, "it's easier to make a case for making more like them." also please remember that 2020 was the year covid broke out and no doubt affected the production in pixelberry in a negative way the way it did other industries. it's no wonder then that they've since resorted to making smut books since they need to make up for the losses in 2020 as well as keep up with global inflation (this is my own hypothesis— i haven't had the time to check pb's reports, but they are public for anyone who wants to look them up. i have seen a post detailing that PB's revenue has been declining in the past year or so).

it's easy for people to just say and complain "pb is gonna keep making crappy porn books with sex every chapter bc it what makes them money instead making stories with substance" and to an extent i agree. they are going to make "crappy porn books" because it's what makes them money. but they aren't greedy assholes and even your beloved andrew shvarts has asked fans to not portray them that way.

i found that confession dramatic because i think it exemplifies two trends that i've seen in the choices fandom in the past few years i've been here: the tendency to regard the writers as money-hungry cunts without understanding the capitalist circumstances and the liberal "everything must be pure and wholesome and respectable" push back against anything that isn't god-revering missionary sex.

"Honestly the fact that choices' porn-masquerading-as-plot books makes the most money for them scares me. A lot." please ask yourself why that scares you. aside from the obvious fact that people don't seem to or just refuse to understand the economic reason for creating these books, please ask yourself why choices' mediocre porn "scares you". these stories cater to a specific audience as i mentioned before: older women interested in escapist and "taboo" sex fantasies. having these fantasies aren't bad and we really do not need people acting like entertaining them through a self-insert app game (with warnings holding your fucking hand and telling you this isn't necessarily good and giving you the chance to opt out should you please) is akin to being a sex offender. the only thing you're doing is reinventing thoughtcrimes.

sex is one of the most normal things in the world. whether or not you personally have sex you can't deny that it's been a factor in the lives of many and frankly you wouldn't even be alive if your parents didn't decide to suck and fuck. in a world where women's desires are suppressed and aren't taken seriously, why do so-called "progressive" fans find it disgusting that some women might want to spend some money to safely explore their sexual fantasies? enough to be disgusted by it that they say they are "scared" by it? it's trashy, it's stupid, it lacks substance, and who the fuck cares? you are not inherently better than these women, and 95% of the time all i see in the tags are people focusing on the romance aspect of these "substantial" books anyway. if you seriously think that an app game like choices can magically make cheating and having affairs a "normal and good" thing irl then you're just a fucking idiot. if game of thrones and house of the dragon didn't make siblings worldwide suck and fuck then what makes you think that choices can abolish the western institution of monogamy overnight?

at some point some people just have to realize that they have the choice (lmao) to close the app and delete it if they aren't happy with it. if you don't like their porn books then go play something else, they have an expansive library and beyond that there are tons of interactive fiction games, dating sims, and visual novels to explore. that's not even touching the fact that you can, i don't know, read an actual fucking book if you want. i see no point in consciously sitting and tapping through these books when you know they just make you miserable and add to the statistics of people playing it. you can't dismantle the capitalist system overnight but you can choose to just not play an app game if it makes you want to peel your skin off.

#playchoices #choices #anonymous #answered

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alodospos · 3 months ago

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Francis plant papa headcanons 🌿

Those headcanons will be solely about mine and my girlfriend's @h-ayata human!au Francis. However, there will be some very universal ones so that everyone can get something they enjoy!

Francis is a very reluctant person when it comes to buying plants. Buying anything alive to be honest. He is a man that values life and doesn't want to buy even a little succulent if it's going to wither and die. In his opinion he is not skilled enough to take care of plants, hence doesn't want to try and gamble with the life of poor flower. This man is 'perfection or nothing' type of person in many terms, it applies here too.

Violet was the person to kinda alter that approach, or just gave him a chance to finally learn how to take a good care of plants, without this blockage. She brought many beautiful species to his home and made him realize how much he missed this flora in empty flat. The amount was overwhelming at first, sure. Nevertheless, it was a perfect opportunity that he used to learn how to properly water, repot, sprinkle, fertilize and wash those little fellas. Viola is always eager to yap about her plants so - it was a win win situation.

So he learned and grew like the greenery in his household with every passing day. He gladly helped his fresh roommate with watering, picking dead leaves and generally keeping the wellness high. Until one day he felt like he finally wants something of his own. He coerced Viola and succeeded - so on her free day off to the plant market they went. They searched far and wide for the perfect little fella for him and finally found one. It was a pink princess philodendron - he loved how unique it was. This baby is still with him to this day.

When he finally buys a plant and it is time to repot it to its forever home - one thing this man can't stand is mediocrity. No way that he is going to use some basic, universal substrate mixed with perlite and expanded clay. What is he? A peasant? No, no, no - each and every one of his plants has to have soil that he ordered online which is specifically made for that type of plant and with specific fertilizer. His plants need princess treatment, that's why he doesn't have that many. Quality over quantity.

He also had some sort of app or like a calendar where he can mark when to water every plant. He used it until he got like over 5 flowers, after that he probably just remembered when to water every one and using tracking app was just unnecessary. Reminders probably annoyed him too much after some time.

#aph france #headcanon #france #hetalia #hetalia axis powers #francis bonnefoy

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hprofational9 · 11 months ago

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csuitebitches · 2 years ago

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On your becoming more well read: what are some reliable somewhat accurate news apps you’d recommend? Also can you make a post on books to read?

The reality is that no media is fully reliable. There’s no such thing as fully accurate reporting. The best we can do is read everything with a pinch of salt.

The next bit could be a little controversial but it is something everyone needs to hear.

In order to form opinions, you must be able to read and consume all sides and spectrums.

That means reading left wing AND right wing news, no matter how aggravating either are.

You can’t tell good journalism from bad journalism unless and until you’ve experienced both. The same way, you cannot form opinions about a certain topic until you’ve seen all major sides to the topic.

Having said that:

News:

* Annual Review (website) : academic articles, short academic articles, popular articles

* CNA Luxury (website) : all things lifestyle, luxury, fashion, food, living

* BBC

* CNN

* Fox News

* Medium (for personal opinions and weird reads)

* Bloomberg

* Wall Street journal

* Yahoo finance

* New York Times

* Google news app (great if you want to quickly consume news without spending too much time)

* The rest are specific to my native country and my native language

Newsletters:

* Bloomberg open and close (markets and finance)

* Emerging tech brew (technology)

* Morningbrew

* CFO brew (because I’m interested in finance)

* Seedtable (this is the best newsletter you could subscribe to if you wanted to subscribe to just one. It’s business and entrepreneurship related but it’s very diverse- biotech, healthcare, money… it’s fabulous. A man called Gonz Sanchez sends the newsletter).

* A couple of others which are personal and selective because I belong to a certain HNI business organisation because of my family

Being well read doesn’t just meaning the act of reading in today’s world. You have to know things, people and communities.

Other methods:

I’m constantly on the look out for events, conferences and networking opportunities. Regardless of whether it’s virtual or in person (I appreciate both). The said organisation I’m a part of arranges some of the best, most influential personalities in the world to come and talk (I attended a business conference where Mona Kattan spoke; another one where Terry Crews spoke about failures; so you get my point about how big these things are).

If you don’t know where to start, I’d say start with asking your bank. Banks in my country tend to host events, lectures and conferences and as your account grows, your access to selective conferences gets stronger.

Another avenue is work; college; university, you know the usual. Ask your boss if they know of any work related conferences happening.

Look up online to see what’s happening as well in your city. Museums often host events too.

Try attending a wide range of events - art, classical music, finance, motivational speaking, history, religion - it will shape you up a lot.

Charity/ volunteer work is another solid way. You need to interact with a lot of people. Choose what you truly like - is it nature, animals, children, old people, education? Do what you gravitate to naturally. And do it because you genuinely want to help, not just for networking and brownie points.

And I’ll definitely make a reading list sometime :)

Edit: I’ve created a free newsletter with the intention of making you well-read with minimal effort on your side. Sign up here! Launch: 8th January 2023.

#c suite #powerful woman #strong women #ceo aesthetic #c suite aesthetic #personal growth #beauty #working woman #empire #that girl #q/a

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genericpuff · 1 year ago

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Hey, I've worked a bit in animation and just wanted to point out that shows very often get pitched and bought out, and can sit in the back burner for a really long time depending on the market! Seems like with all the strikes and post covid lag, and a market thats already saturated with greek mythology atm (think percy jackson live action coming soon, youtube series, other webcomics, etc.), lore olympus is probably floating in the air atm until the time is right. These kinds of things can take years to happen, even 10+ years! Some of the most popular animated shows were pitched years before they were picked up and sent into production. Hoping in the time its on hold, they get some really good writers to clean up the story. I don't mean to disregard your post, but just a lil bit of info on how that nature works in animation. I love lore rekindled too, keep it up!

Oh hey thanks for your input! So I do actually have a diploma in animation (though I never ended up working in the larger industry) so I know a bit about how things like that can happen. Nimona's a great recent example, it was bought in 2015 by 20th Century Fox but never made it through development because of Disney purchasing them and bringing the project to a crawl due to it being LGBTQ+, then they shut down Blue Sky and that kept the project in limbo until it got picked up by a new studio and brought to Netflix. So it took well over 10 years for that one to finally hit the screen.

That said, most of that post is addressing the fact that if LO is going to get a TV show (I'm really strongly believing it isn't at this point, esp not with JHC but that's me) then stalling it out for 10 years or however long probably won't be the best move. Especially not with how things are going with animation at large.

While LO is the biggest on the WT platform, the platform itself still isn't as prestigious here in the west as say, DC or Marvel. Its platform and its comics just don't have that sort of longevity out here. LO is also undoubtedly nearing the end of its run and it's struggling to stay relevant as it is - so to make a show years down the road when it's long gone out of everyone's minds (which it will be as soon as it ends and WT starts shilling the next big thing) just sounds like a missed opportunity. It could rejuvenate interest, sure, but it could just as easily flop due to its fanbase having moved on/lost interest/etc. LO is pretty much reliant on WT's advertising at this point, it's not a good sign that WT has to keep putting notifications to read LO everywhere on the app. WT loooves the "strike while the iron is hot" methodology and now with the show they just drag it out? It feels less like striking the iron while it's hot and more like trying to get a fire going, period.

Like, when Nimona got its movie, it was like "omg Nimona's finally getting a movie!!!" but I can't help get the sense that if LO goes through that same treatment, the response is gonna be, "that gross comic with the underage girl and old man billionaire is still getting a TV show??" Maybe that's a mean assumption to make but if LO is struggling to stay relevant and in a positive light now, god knows what that's going to be like years from now if and when they do release a show.

Especially when it comes to comics like LO which generate so much criticism, I feel like it's going to go through the same thing Twilight did, where people adored it during the peak of its run but as soon as the series was over and the hype left everyone's brains it gave people room to actually reflect on it and realize how icky it was LOL (and if it goes the full way of Twilight, people will read it as a joke over how bad it is).

There are also theories in the community that a lot of what WT is doing with LO rn (paying for Rachel to be in the top billing spot at NYCC, getting her a second Eisner, etc.) could very well be them trying to "shop it around" for investors or a new network, by putting Rachel in the spotlight and going "see! look at how successful this comic is! buy it!" That's just a theory of course, but it really isn't a good look when LO wins awards and people ask why. It feels like WT's is trying to throw money at a problem without realizing what's causing the problem in the first place. It winning an Eisner or being hinted at a TV show or getting a top billing spot at NYCC won't give it legitimacy because the comic they're advertising is still garbage, they're trying to convince people it has merit when it doesn't. If anything, it'll make LO and WT lose even more credibility because it makes people wonder why the fuck a comic like LO is winning those awards and why it's being given more attention and opportunities over other comics on the platform that are far more deserving.

Anyways, this post is kinda all over the place, but that's my two cents, my point really is that if there is a show happening, it's definitely not happening soon (in spite of Rachel saying "yeah it's happening!") because there's no clear timeline or progress that's been made or even team in charge of it at this point - and if it happens down the road, its only chance of doing well will be if it gets a major overhaul in its writing IMO because the comic is way too much of a mess rn for television LOL

That said, I'd love to genuinely believe that the show will happen someday, but I feel like the best time for it to happen has passed, especially with the comic losing the quality and prestige it was sold to JHC for since then. That's just me though.

#ama #ask me anything #anon ask me anything #anon ama #lore olympus critical #lo critical #antiloreolympus #anti lore olympus

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bastetwastaken · 11 months ago

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15. for the writing thing! Ship: puzzleshipping. They met over a dating app and it‘s their first date. Awkwardness and something funny and fluffy is very welcome if you can think of anything^^

Thanks friend <3 Oh you know I love any opportunity to write funny and fluffyness for these two ^^ I had fun with this one.

Happy holidays! I hope you enjoy the little gift <3

.........

Why did I suggest this?

He shifted nervously where he stood, a hand rubbed his arm awkwardly as he pressed himself back against the wall.

Of course the city was busy today. Of course the market was packed. It was the week before Christmas and he really should have expected this.

Well actually, the truth was that he had expected this, and he thought he’d been prepared.

In an effort to take his mind off the rapidly rising anxiety, he pulled his phone out of his pocket, unlocking it to be greeted by his open messages. Atem hadn’t said anything else since he’d messaged him letting him know that he was on the train about half an hour ago.

The non-anxious part of him wanted to laugh at the situation he found himself in. He never would have put himself down as the type to use a dating app to find a boyfriend, he would have scoffed if any of his friends had suggested that he’d find someone as…wonderful as Atem on an app like this.

Of course, he’d had his fair share of strange messages, and he’d had to wade through a lot of unwanted attention to find this guy, but he was so glad he’d persisted.

He’d never agreed to meet anyone from this app though, and he’d wanted to suggest somewhere public, somewhere that he wouldn’t feel so exposed and vulnerable if Atem turned out to not be the person he said he was.

He wanted him to be who he seemed though, so fucking badly.

Swiping his thumb across the screen, he returned to Atems profile. His stomach filled with butterflies as he swiped through the photos of him, and he buried his face into his thick scarf in an attempt to hide the smile on his face.

He sighed happily. Obviously, the photos had attracted him to Atems profile in the first place, but not because they were the standard shit he usually saw on the app, shirtless men taking risque photos, trying to see how close they could get to nude without being banned. No, Atems photos were just…normal.

Photos of him in an oversized jumper and jeans grinning in front of a sculpture at an art exhibition, him in a t-shirt cuddling a grey cat which was licking his face, Atem laughing happily whilst holding a huge plush Kuriboh at Kaibaland.

He’d sent a message and had no idea how hard he’d fall for this man in only three months of talking, and now here he was. Waiting for him to show up so they could finally meet in person for the first time.

A couple walked past him, a little too close for his liking, so he slid his phone back into his pocket and resigned himself to looking around the street awkwardly.

He shouldn’t have gotten here so early…but he couldn’t stop himself. He was a mess of nerves, excited to finally meet this man who he felt so much for and he couldn’t wait at home any longer.

Only now, he was stuck standing in the cold, trying to stay out of the way of the people who had decided to visit the market that day too. He looked up and drew a steady breath, the soft lights strung between leafless trees helped to calm him.

“Yugi?”

The voice startled him and he jumped, looking quickly to his side, eyes seeking out who had managed to sneak up on him and finding a gentle face he knew so well but had never seen in person, soft red eyes lined with perfect makeup which he’d not expected to be so vibrant in real life.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.” His voice was soft and familiar. Maybe a little different from when they’d spoken on the phone, but still recognisable to him.

He smiled, eyes quickly moving over the other man, taking in the dark clothing he wore which seemed to suit him so well. It took some real effort for him to pull his eyes back to Atems face, but when he did he was rewarded with a gentle smile which brought butterflies to his stomach.

“Yep.” He laughed awkwardly. “Atem?”

“Yeah.” Atem smiled shyly, eyes dropping to the ground for a moment before looking back at him. “I’m not late am I?”

Atem sounded panicked and he shook his head.

“Oh no.” He was quick to reassure him. “I just like to get to places way earlier than I need to.” He explained. “It, um, makes me feel better about…stuff.” He waved a hand vaguely around them.

Atem smiled softly and nodded.

“I understand.” Atem said. “Just so you know, if stuff gets too much, we can always try another day. No pressure.”

Atems words made him feel better immediately and he sighed in relief. He’d been right about him, Atem was genuinely a nice person and that made him feel so much better about being in such a crowded space.

“Thank you.” He said with a smile. “But I’ll be okay, don’t worry.”

“Okay.” Atems eyes moved down his body quickly and he blushed. “You look amazing by the way. I can’t believe we’re finally meeting in person.”

“Me neither.” He said, a soft laugh leaving his lips as he readjusted the scarf around his neck. “You look so much better in person.”

Atem laughed and he chewed his lip, that probably didn’t come out right….but he’d said it now.

“I mean…” He trailed off awkwardly when Atem shook his head.

“I know.” Atem said kindly.

Neither of them spoke for a moment, they just looked at each other in silence and he wasn’t sure what to do now. He’d been the one to suggest this place for their first date and now he was just standing there…doing nothing.

“So-”

“I-”

They began speaking at the same time then stopped, laughing softly and Yugi instantly felt more at ease.

“You first.” Atem said with a smile.

“I was going to ask if you’d been here before.” He said awkwardly.

“To the city? Or to the market?” Atem asked.

“Both?” He said.

“Um, I’ve been to the city before, yeah. But not the market…” Atem smiled at him. “How about you?”

“I don’t live far from here so yeah, I’ve been a few times…” He trailed off, not sure where he was going with this conversation.

Fuck, this was so awkward. Atem was going to think he was weird and he’d leave.

“In that case, I trust you to show me around.” Atem said happily, holding out a hand to him and smiling. “Shall we?”

He was so glad Atem seemed better at conversation than he was and he nodded quickly, looking down at Atems hand and blushing as he took it in his.

What was wrong with him? He was a grown man. In his late twenties, with a real life job and a flat and everything. Why was he blushing like a child just because a pretty guy wanted to hold his hand?

“Yeah.” He cleared his throat awkwardly and began walking down the street, Atem walking next to him, the hand in his warm and comforting. “I love christmas.” He said as they made their way through the steady stream of people walking around them, past the stalls set up in the middle of the street.

“I’d guessed.” Atem teased, his arm bumping against his gently. “So do I…it’s just such a cosy time of year. You know? The cold weather, thick cosy jumpers, mulled wine if you like that kind of thing.”

“Right?” He said happily. “You get it. I’ve always been a sucker for an excuse to stay indoors and get comfy and cosy, watch a nice movie, eat some comfort food…but I do love the social side of christmas too, like seeing family and coming to places like this.”

“Oh, I get that.” Atem laughed. “Especially the staying in and being warm part. I don’t do well with the cold, honestly.”

Atem laughed off the comment but he suddenly felt awful for making him come out, and on a day where the temperature had barely risen beyond freezing too.

“I’m sorry.” He said softly. “We can go find somewhere to be inside if you like?”

He slowed his pace and Atem stopped entirely, pulling his hand to turn him toward him. Atems smile was soft and gentle, his laugh was quiet.

“I really don’t mind being here with you.” Atem said, his voice soft and smooth. “I’d stay out here all night if it meant spending time with you.”

He laughed happily, the words were so cheesy but for some reason, he really didn’t mind that when they came from Atem. They didn’t feel cheap and empty from him.

“Careful what you say.” He said. “They stay open late, you know.”

“Good.” Atem smiled. “That means we can spend loads of time together.” Atems smile turned shy and he looked down at their hands. “If you want to, of course.”

“I want to.” He said quickly, laughing when Atem looked back up at him. Someone walked past behind him, nudging him closer to Atem but he didn’t mind at all.

“I’m glad.” Atem said softly, letting him step closer again when another person huffed and pushed past them.

They should probably move. They were standing in the middle of where people were walking, so clearly in the way, but Atems chest was warm against his and a hand was resting against his waist and suddenly the next logical step was for him to lean in just a little closer and press his lips to Atems.

He hadn’t fully registered that he’d actually moved until he felt soft warm lips against his. He would have been shocked at how forward he’d been, but Atems hand moved to the small of his back and pulled him closer and he wasn’t sure how he was meant to think about much of anything after that.

........

Want a little christmassy/winter themed drabble? Find the list here and send me an ask ^.^ <3

#puzzleshipping #atem #yugi mutou #fanfic #ygo dm #writing

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