#We just want simple loving lives
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When I first really followed Doki Doki Literature Club, Yuri was my fave cause I liked her hair and overall personality, and while I still do like her...I think I'm kinda more for Monika in terms of self shipping. Like, she just feels that niche I like of wanting to make characters I like happy, and yeh she was def flawed in doin what she did to get to the player, but what would you expect? You suddenly get god-like powers and realize your friends are just scripted encounters? It'd be tough!
I just think Monika deserves one player to be happy with. Ya know, to date, spend time with, marry...settle down...have some kids...grow old together...ya know, couple stuff, ehehe...
#selfship ramble#I just think she deserves some happiness#Dunno if it'd just be a normal setting or like an AU where I bring her to the real world#Maybe a mix?#God-like player with god-like program#Make things so that the whole Doki gang is real#And where neither of us have our powers#We just want simple loving lives#Is that too much to ask#doki doki monika#ddlc monika#ddlc yuri#monika#yuri#for those curious#I also like Sayori and Natsuki#Sayori is kinda bland but cute#And Natsuki is silly and also deserves better#And of course Yuri deserves better#Me and Monika love all of the literature club so we save em all#doki doki literature club#yumeship community#selfship talk#yumeship#fictional other#self ship community#official louis posting#self ship#yumeship talk
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#jiang cheng#While listening to the Lotus Seed extra I was like 'aw this art is so cute.'#Post The Fanfic Fiasco (re: last comic's tags) I am haunted by the green orbs. WWX has a bag of edible green orbs and I am in hell.#First draft of this comic's script has JC saying 'dude you wouldn't even share with me!' and I love his little sibling indignation.#Middle child power is knowing that you don't have to share with your siblings. The little wet eyes and weak hand slaps do NOTHING.#JC probably already ate all of his lotus seeds. That's on you dude!#Part of me wants to get deeper with the metaphor of the lotus seeds here. It is a gesture of a certain kind of affection.#JYL gives something to WWX she does not quite share with JC. And WWX in turn gives something to LWJ he does not share with JC.#Really puts JC's line 'You're always eating...eating eating' into a very different light.#There are other kinds of starving besides hunger. There are other ways to be a glutton than just food and drink.#WWX's character pre-burial mounds is heavily focused on 'Indulgence'. Be it wine or flirting or hunting or eating-#-or receiving admiration; He is always indulging in ways we never see JC do.#I think the intentional contrast was with the Lan's 'Live simple and without indulgence' lifestyle. LWJ is the abstainer to wwx's gluttony.#But it does expand to JC as well! Both are locked into the role model position to have friction against WWX's apparent freedom.#I think LWJ and JC (at this point) see WWX as something they both want (in different capacities) and someone they want to be.#Yet despite the history between them it is not JC who WWX reaches out to. It's LWJ.#The boy already has an inferiority complex! Stop making it accidently worse!
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i can't believe you have to eat every single day like wdym i just did that yesterday???????????????????????
#not to mention you're supposed to do it multiple times a day#HOWWWWWWW#LITERALLY HOWWWWWWWWWWWWW#it's such a big chore#task#whatever#it's fucking ridiculous#and it's not like i don't want to eat#i love food#i just forget#aaaaaaand most of the time it's incredibly hard to even decide on what to eat .#and then there is ofc the fact that you have to MAKE the food#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand we mustn't forget the good old Appetite Loss either#isn't living like so fun you guys#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#anyway where is papa toji i KNOWWWWW he can cook some good fucking meals#very simple meals but that's literally what i like okay#he just makes some ramen and it's thee best fucking ramen you'v ever had#mayor of loserville#tw eating issues#oh btw if anybody thinks that i should use some other tw's on this then let me know i never know which ones to add
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killing people who don’t get an animals consent before touching them &/or ignore when animals are visibly uncomfortable with being touched.
#MOTHERS FRIEND DOING THIS WITH OUR CAT RN IM PISSED.#SHE DIDNT EVEN GIVE TOFU ANY TIME TO SNIFF OR ANYTHING??#Sigh.#tofu came downstairs to see what was up bc person was in the house#But person just immediately started petting her#even tho tofu was visibly uncomfortable and clearly just wanted a sniff test or sm#went to my room asap after that and tofu followed quick on my heels#obvs I let her sniff as much as she wants before petting her (if she even wants fuss) so she had a sniff and very much seemed to want fuss#so I gave her a few strokes and then sorta checked in and she swirled around and bumped her head into my hand (all the while her tail was#pointed straight up with the tip quivering a little every few moments - a sign of happiness/excitement to see a familiar person)#so we had cuddles for a bit until she hopped off my chest to go get water or sm :3#BUT I DONT GET WHY MORE PEOPLE DONT HAVE SIMPLE WHOLESOME INTERACTION WITH THEIR CAT LIKE THIS??#LIKE. CATS ARE SENTIENT. THEY SEEK AUTONOMY - ESPECIALLY BODILY AUTONOMY. WHY TF WOULD YOU NOT LET THEM GIVE/DENY CONSENT??#like. if you aren’t willing to learn enough about an animal to understand when it’s unhappy at the very least *why* would you interact with#one?? (This person literally has a cat as well.)#idk man these are the same sorts of people that’d probably do the ‘awww just give me a hug! I’m your auntie(/whatever)! why can’t i have a#hug? 🥺’ sorta thing.. like. BRO. It isn’t my/the cat ‘s fucking job to regulate/look after your own grown ass feelings.#SIGH..#just. The fact this person has like.. met tofu once. Lived in the same house as her for maybe 4/5 days one time and thinks the cat is#obligated to put up with her or whatever.#(This is how I imagine people be acting around cats when they’re like ‘idk man cats just don’t like me! Cats are just independent by nature#I’m just stood there having to listen to them shit talk a whole species bc they don’t understand consent (or at least don’t universally#value it - eg; with children; with animals) ANYWAYS. CATS ARE A SOCIAL SPECIES WHO HAVE DEVELOPED TO LIVE CLOSELY WITH AND DEPEND ON HUMANS#THEYRE OFTEN VERY AFFECTIONATE AND LOVING AND FORM LASTING RELATIONSHIPS WITH THEIR HUMANS AND WILL MOURN THEIR DEATH PROBABLY MORE THAN#HALF OF THE HUMANS WHO ATTENDED THEIR FUNERAL.)#If tofu doesn’t like you I don’t like you mate. I am wholeheartedly willing to cut people off if they act wrong with my cat - like - BRO.#IVE KNOWN HER LONGER THAN I HAVE MOST OTHER PPL IN MY LIFE. SHES GOT ME THROUGH WORSE AND IS ALWAYS HAPPY N EXCITED TO SEE ME.#That cat has done more for me than you ever have! She loves me with her whole fucking soul and I her with mine. If she picks up the wrong#vibes from you/you break any of her clearly set boundaries we are DONE.#(Obvs /nbh - nobody here. & generally lighthearted but uhh yeah needed to rant abt this bc I care strongly abt it and other ppl should too)
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When I talk about ground-breaking trans history, I'm talking about this:
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#trans meme#described images#image description in alt#YES THIS IS 10000000% A JOKE POST#this image just lives rent-free in my head because i'm a simple man#i think i'm so obsessed because i would LOVE a miku binder. how hilarious and campy would that be#it was weird during the time where people woobified the founding fathers because of that musical though#like. there /might/ be better historical figures to do that to if you really want to????#so i'm definitely glad that part is over because it was probably.... Not Good#and anyway i don't think it's necessarily appropriate TO woobify historical figures like that?? like. it definitely crosses the line...#...to the point where you might treat them like a book character rather than a complex human being...#...especially if they have done injustices toward others. we must recognize that without downplaying it by treating them like a character
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yOu'Re gOiNg fOr a LiTeR? | "Habs react to Quebec Maple facts", 10.22.24
#guys this is not becoming a regular thing this is just the mental illinois breaking through but ALSO I SAW THIS AND SCREAMEDDDDD#they did this For Me. those are all my guys. like yes yes we know about xhekovský but that’s my adopted austrian son david reinbacher!!!#that’s my baby goalie carey price time travel cowboy son cayden primeau!!!! and i just LOVE that they were like#‘yeah so one of them is gonna be a bitch in both pairs. & yeah we’re gonna make them lose.’ & i am HERE for it. you know the media day vid#where they asked all of them who was brat on the team and like 75% said slaf which we all KNEW? yes. correct. even more evidence godddd#also empathize so much with him because i hate feeling stupid & he is notably like. a very smart guy w/good awareness of broader society#and sorry to get like this on a silly little post i’m about to fanfiction-ify before i have xhekovský hours but so much of this goes back#to the xenophobia in the nhl and how we treat players (not only that. people in north am/west tbh) whose first language is not english#and degrade/discredit them and their intelligence by virtue of their multilingualism and how we even think about multilingualism as a whole#e.g. the sense that certain languages are perceived as more ‘valuable’ capital/the support that SHOULD be there for language learning simpl#is not from what i can tell in the nhl so even if you wanted to foster an environment of intercultural competency they’re doing nothing to#support it. the stories!! of so many guys! reliant solely upon their teammates for basic necessities! WHERE is your language acquisition#programming. sorry the linguistics language and culture attempted to jump out there & i am not conveying what i want to say at ALL. anyway#juraj's slow descent into madness as u can SEE him visibly getting more & more over it & done is my roman empire. like he's having fun#at first he's laughing 'what is this whiskey?' & i AM thinking that toothy little grin at arber with the jerkoff hand motion about the mapl#syrup only taking a few minutes to come (out) was a dig. lord knows arber deserved it with his shorts pulled all the way up like GOD the me#you put here to wear slutty little 3" shorts live in cold CANADA and have to cover up their thigh tattoos. what a travesty. and the amount#of THIGH in this video i- biting. arber's hairy legs slaf's manspreading more as he gets frustrated & arber teases him i. and DAVID????#on a completely different note cayden with his face covered is giving me INTENSE brainworms i have the most unhinged storylines for him#AND THE BRYNDZOVE HALUSKYYYY everything past 2:00 is gold. david's tired sighs. slaf hating it here. arber having the time of his life#'taste' 'that's not an advantage' DAVID kill him. 'maple syrup specialist... normal guy 🤷' slaf you are the WORST loser and ily for it#arber defending his wife w/his life... juraj's the smartest guy in the room & arber's on his leash about it. it goes both ways (to be cont)#juraj slafkovský#arber xhekaj#david reinbacher#cayden primeau#montreal canadiens#i'm xhekovský posting leave me alone i'm also *****
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i think about the whole "love that" exchange a lot.
#i think i already have a post about this somewhere im just. rotating it#they realize they just kinda revealed a bit too much in front of Trent Crimm (Formerly) The Independent#and he does the whole biting wind-up to a question you know is going to be sharp as hell. bringing in that heat#and rebecca just. doesn't even try to get out of it#is she taking a leap of faith? is she just tired of spinning a whole yarn? testing him? giving him a chance?#and his response is just. simple. a real smile--almost conspiratorial and they're both in on the joke--and 'love that.'#sincere and almost warm. love that. bc that's what he actually thinks. not asking what he thinks he should#what he thinks the crowd wants to hear. but just. god her ex husband is a dickhead. absolutely you should try to fuck him over. love that#and rebecca all but beaming at him in response#i wish we'd gotten more of their dynamic tbh. i think that interaction probably helped soothe any anxieties she had about the whole thing#i think the next time we really see them interact is just the girl talk thing#where she's gleefully including him on the gossip and he's SO fucking pleased to get a good grade in girl talk something both normal to w#but like them developing an almost easy banter Fast. please. and like. him letting himself be. himself. in front of other people#not just ted. and rebecca GETS that if anyone gets getting flayed by the lasso effect it's her#so like. IDK MAN I JUST THINK THEY SHOULD BOND#also keeley. DEFINITELY keeley. all three of them. FUCK#trent crimm#rebecca welton#gertspeak#god. him being so pleased about the girl talk comment too. lives in my brain rent free#rebecca or keeley pays him a genuine but offhand compliment and he (and clearly completely unconsciously) just#fully does a pleased little wiggle in his seat. and they're like hmmmm
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i love ganqing sm. keqing the capable, skilled in swordsmanship, kind yet confident and highly ambitious leader of liyue, with her capable, war veteran, gentle general secretary supporting the qixing, yet a bit weird qilin wife. And it's so important to me to underline that ganyu is just a bit weird and strange, bc that's her charm!!!
>appears for the first time on the roof >weird mullet hairstyle >eats raw wild flowers (her favorite is very bitter) >falls asleep in a haystack (can fall asleep anywhere really) >sensitive horns >raised by a bird mom
like yes, she's beautiful, strong and awesome but do you care about her weirdgirl swag!! keqing is beautiful, strong and awesome too, but i think she's also just some guy, with rocks for brain in the most genuine, charming way. It's so fun to think about them because of it
#ganqing#ganyu#keqing#i'm just saying. we should never forget abt ganyu's charming weirdness#and i will always see them as normal capable adults i ain't buying all that ''disaster lesbian'' stuff anymore. i've had enough#disaster lesbian out. capable adult who is a little weird and awkward is IN#they can figure it all out. the office ladies will carefully navigate their developing romantic relationship like they deal with paperwork#this is their cooperative project. they never even imagined it'd end this way back when they were at odds!!!#but now they want nothing more. just live their life together happily while sharing their passions and dreams.#enjoying all the simple things in life and all the little quirks of each other#(clenches fist) they're just so...#anyways back to the point. ganyu is a little weird and i love her for it and keqing especially loves her for it. also fluffy qilin wife :)
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pet peeve is when a story tells us something is aberrant, but it seems to matter more about who does the behavior than the behavior itself. rorschach in snyder's watchmen isn't going too far; we watch nite owl and silk spectre ii snap necks and arms with gleeful, loving abandon, in slow motion no less, while they lecture the audience about rorschach's violence. heroes frequently torture the plot contrivance out of a villain and then moralize to the camera when the villains do the same. indominus rex's killing spree doesn't shock or appall me; all the jurassic world dinosaurs act like mindless killing machines, and the camera lingers, rapturous, on their cruelty. it's not an outlier. there's nothing interesting about it beyond as a set piece.
in a better script, the indominus rex would have had pathos; a chimera made for entertainment, for profit, stitched together with no regard for itself and placed in a lonely box. a freak among freaks. of course it would be mad. but the film wasn't interested in it as an animal, or a character, only as a moving piece of scenery for people to scream at or breathe tensely while it can clearly smell and reach them but doesn't, because it isn't a character and doesn't have motivations.
it's just sort of boring, i suppose. it tries like all other empty drab things do to cover it with bombast and roaring and soaring brassy scores but it's just sort of dull. a sprawl of nothing.
conversely peele's nope is a transcendent monster movie, imo, because it thinks about the the whys and hows, how jean jacket perceives the world, how the world perceives her, and lets that shape the narrative as much as jupe or emerald or gordy. they consulted biologists and behaviorists, digging into the meat of it. the creature as a camera as an animal as a device. nope has layers. it takes its own insane premise seriously, and has something to say, and is a goddamn good movie. i forgot where i was going with this.
#always rattling that quote from peele about the difference between horror and comedy being a matter of timing#creature horror is my favorite horror and most of it is Bad but i love it. sometimes you strike genuine gold and other times. well.#drives me crazy when monsters behave only in ways meant to be scary rather than how a real living thing would act. you can do both.#i remember hearing about a woman attacked by a moose in her own back yard. it gored and stomped her then left back into the woods#a few minutes later as she tried to crawl away it came back and attacked her again. terrifying! for no purpose!#a prey animal attack is often more frightening and vicious than a predator's imo#because to be eaten -- that carries its own logic. a prey animal though holds fear and rage and desperation in the core of it. it Knows.#a lion is a simple creature compared to a beef bull who just managed to corner the farmer against the fence#unlike say movie monsters continuing to chase and kill and attack while a volcano goes off around them and literally burns them to death#don't get me started on the icy swimming feathered raptor#also the goddamn dimetrodon in the caves like. i have never seen a beast less suited for a goddamn cave. why is it acting like that.#the book jurassic park goes into the behaviors and dynamics and such of the dinosaurs and what it means that we made them and why#using the cutting edge of science to craft both story and its monsters#but the franchise is dreadfully incurious#as many franchises end up being in the end#frog croaks#i guess i wanted to complain about the jurassic world franchise specifically actually#i haven't read crichton since high school. maybe i should revisit and see if my opinion holds lol
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#bro why is everyone growing up and away and trying to figure out their lives and careers and loves#and im just sitting here missing them?#like sure im trying to figure out mine too we're all that age so I don't resent them for it#but why don't they miss me? why don't they feel empty when they haven't talked to me in a long time?#like. didn't they feel very light and happy after talking to me like i did with them don't they have a bad day and think that oh ill#talk to me and it will all feel okay even if it isn't just for a minute?#oh ny god i feel so pathetic asking this but like why am i suddenly crying now???#like my bestf. she's so busy in her new internship in mumbai that she can't be bothered to text me back#a simple yes no question for days. like i understand you have cool new office and work and friends and your stupid fucking ex#that you couldn't stop crying about to me living in that city with you but what about me? what about us?? what about you saying#that you're my first bestfriend i haven't told this to anyone else this is forever everyone else judges me but you're the best#like i just feel like if you're going to leave me then don't fucking say shit like that to me??#okay oh my god this is so irrational but i literally can't stop crying and it's definitely pms like i checked#she's not even leaving she's just suddenly busy and adjusting it's only been like a month#but i hate this stupid fucking knife like fear that as soon as someone is a little busy or seems like they're pulling away a little my#brain is like okay they hate me they're going to leave me so pack your bags we're leaving first#like i know a better solution would be to just tell her that hey dude i fucking miss you and i saw this show and remember how you used to#love peter kavinsky because he was adorable and i want to sit and watch it with you and just why aren't we back in school#where we are basically forced to hang out for like 7 hours because im so sick of only seeing you like once in 2 months for a few hours#like i know it's not your fault and we're just growing up and in different directions but just please like five more minutes can you stay#i don't even have the confidence to say anything to her lol she's my only friend like if even she gets mad and leaves#but i know that's not how healthy relationships work. and ugh my sister is so fucking far away i can feel it everyday#in the 5 and a half hour time difference. i hate this i hate everyone everyone has to go so far away#i hate living in this empty fucking house and being responsible for my own emotions fuck this isse accha toh living with dad hi hai#atleast when im there there are only 2 emotions anxiety and boredom. now i have a whole house to myself to cry whenever I need#for however long i need in a locked room. really looking forward to adulting haha i can see just see myself succeeding so well🙄#man this is crazy im gonna go do jumping jacks or something so this comes and goes faster#umm#dni
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also ive been playing pokemon tcg pocket lately i downloaded it purely bc i wanted to collect the cards (i used to collect irl but it got way too expensive and its so hard to find cards in my area they sell out really fast) but ive started actually building decks and playing the game and its fun but its soooo funny bc when i was a kid me and my siblings did NOT play correctly at all
#we never actually learned so we just made up our own rules and shit#its actually very fun tho#im really interested in card games but theyre so expensive to get into and a lot of them have really complex rules and systems#so ive never like sat down and learned how to play any of them#but pokemon is really simple and fun#i also played shadowverse for a bit and i really enjoyed that but i ran out of space on my phone for it#i wanna get back into it tho since i think i can download it on pc#a friend of mine plays vanguard and that seems fun and has a lot of cards id love to collect but it also seems really confusing lmao#and once again just waaay too expensive for me#esp since i dont live near a card shop or anything so its not like id have anyone to play it with#its fine tho im happy with pokemon i love pokemon!!!!! i love collecting the cards i love the art sm#its fun#i got my most wanted card too so were vibing
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The thing that sucks about knowing the context for a popular ship redraw meme or incorrect quote is watching people be so so incorrect about it and just having to sit there, gripping your thigh, reminding yourself of your values
My personal problem is the quote from "Everything Everywhere All At Once": "In another life I would have really liked just doing laundry and taxes with you"
Because every day EVERY DAY even with ships I love, I watch people use it as a "Oh my god isn't it so tragic that these two characters are forced to suffer the horrors or to be ripped apart when in their heart of hearts they want to be living domestically and doing laundry and taxes?"
And I have to sit there and think "No no you don't get it! That line wasn't the tragedy of the characters not having a better life where they can just be together. It's a different kind of tragedy! The main character didn't like her normal Chinese immigrant life of running a laundromat and dealing with taxes and her family in the USA. Once she learned about all of these different worlds, she began to feel even more like her current life was one that she didn't want. In fact, this life where the guy said that popular line was one where she chose not to go to the USA with him to build a life and love together and became a famous actress instead. She has been thinking about how her husband truly held her down and stifled her life. How if she hadn’t chosen him she wouldn't have had to deal with him and her life would be better and more exciting. And so she's talking to this alternate version of her husband who never became her husband, and she starts making a case for why this is the best outcome. After all, who would want to live in a laundromat and do taxes when she can be a movie star and have anyone she wants? And this is when he tells her that that life that she rejects, that she feels is lowly and one that no one would want, is something that he wants. He doesn't care that she's a famous actress now, he would have loved to just live a simple life with her, even if it was hard and taxing. And this moment in the movie is so so many things (things I'm not even doing justice to here), but it is also a major moment that highlights the disparity in these two characters (even if one isn't her og husband) and their desires.
The main character feels trapped in her life and that she never lived up to her potential. Her husband truly would want to be with her simply because of the bits where it isn't exciting. Even if they're poor and suffer hardship and do things considered simple and lowly, he would still like that life with her.
So yes every time I see this meme my brain screams "get out of here with your blorbos in an au who tragically can't live normally and domestically. Bring in your blorbos who love(d) each other and are messy and are on the verge of divorce and want different things in life, who have to make a choice in what to do about it. Give me your "person who feels trapped in this small life and wanted bigger and better things who lowkey resents the other who is just supporting them" x "person who understands this life isn't always easy or glamorous but is glad that they get to do it every day with this person, who would choose a life of love with them no matter what"
#i just be ramblin#god that movie is so good#after that scene?#in one of the timelines the mc let's go and starts smashing shit before signing the divorce papers. and her (now ex) husband begs for her to#be let off easy and claims that this only happened because he sprung divorce on her. so she sits outside and smokes with the lady with the#irs who went through the same thing#there's a universe where her and the irs lady just live happily and intimately and simply out of love. and happen to have hot dog fingers#in her original universe she goes back to the appointment with her family and the irs lady to fix their taxes. she stays with her current#life but she understands her husband and her daughter much better now#She gets to live out all feelings of anger and anguish and catharsis and potential choices for this situation in different universes#and while this version of her chooses to stay with the life she has now‚ she is still never punished in the universe where she chooses to#divorce her husband and change her life#The story doesn't present a sole solution to the dissonance between her and her husband's wants out of life#She just is able to learn things about herself from this journey and improve as a person due to her experiences with different versions of#her husband and daughter#the narrative gives her all the tools and lessons she needs to make her choices and recognizes that there is no sole good choice#except perhaps the idea that we have to choose to be kind to people in this world#anyways sorry for going off about this#this movie is amazing and makes me feel things and it gets me when people misrepresent such a painful line from that movie as being about#the tragedy of not being able to have a simple life with the one you love
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bedtime nowww probably ummm today qas not what i wanted it 2 be but its fine. i dont feel negative just a very very very numb day which is almost worse. but only almost 🙏
#i did get thr laundry done didnt fold it didnt take a shower#so thatll hopefuly be tmrw#i hope im able to do an activity with somebody tmrw.... the kids will be back at school so umm. no risk of weeman asking for my laptop in#the morning. or maybe me n lamp could play aa... idk#i feel like such a loser i go 1 day without bothering my family and im like wahhh im lonely. Can you shut up ..... we r better than this.#but wtvr. thats also a mean thought and i shouldnt be idolizing the way i lived last year. We were taking spongebaths and eating#1 bowl of soup a day crying ourselves to sleep every night and literally going weeks on end wo talking to our loved ones. so why am i like#We need to go back ! well i know why its bc i cant just let myself heal and move on bc of my stupid complex#and tbf i was very efficient back then. i ws able to do my spongebaths at least every 3 days and i did my laundry every week right on#schedule and i had a job....all it took was literally not being a person in any meaningful way FJFNGJGN. idk#it was very simple. its still very simple perhaps simpler (#no job) but instead i just feel guilty i guess. sbt everything#which i ws doing last year but again i was too out of it to rly dwell. i just cried at work a lot abt it#but now its like. i dont have a job to go to to focus on. my interests/hobbies can only distract me for a few days maximum b4 they become#nothing 2 me. and then im just back in limbo again and it feels pointless#and even when its a 'good' phase of something actually keeping me distracted from everything its like. not. all it does is ruin my sleep#schedule again yk. ik im literally the timeloop guy so u think id loveee Everyday being exactly the same over and over and over but well i#dont. bc they arent actually the same day theyre just reminders that everything does keep fucking going but im stuck. which is the opposite#of what i want. and what id have if the beautiful timeloop would simply rescue me. wtvr tho.... she doesnt even know i exist 😥#little joke. IDK. like i said its better ig than having a truly miserable day but. man. i wish everything was better#i ws gonna say like it used to be but. yk. ive been depressed since i was like 7 its not like. idk. i wish i was born different and i wish#my head worked and i wish none of it had evrr happened. but itis ok. i cant think of a funny cutesy alternative to put here so we will just#say nothing. yay
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what if instead of messaging me in the middle of the night about your stupid fucking girlfriend and your stupid fucking problems with her you actually act like my fucking friend and message me like how you message everyone else in our group
#bye ignore my venting bigger problems what fucking ever#im sick of her ass she only messages us for us to help her with her fucking girlfriend problems like we arent even friends atthis fckn point#and i love her shes so funny whatever but god shes literally the worst because i just want to be friends i dont fucking care ab her goddamn#selfish ass gf thats shes obsessed with. be obsessed tell me about it but cant we be friends ab other stuff too#we used to be her 'favorite friend' cause we shared so many interests and we hung around what fucking ever but fuck that right#get a gf and just use us to help better yalls relationship without even telling her you're sharing her private msgs w us huh yeah sure#what fucking ever im so done with this bitch and i cant even get my contacts out cause i have long nails and im js poking my eye#AND SHE WOULD NEVER BE SORRY if our friendship fell apart she would tell everyone i was jealous of her gf or what ever i literally dont care#she was like an older sister before i dont get why getting a gf would have to change shit like ok good for u but what ab us#what about me its not even fucking fair like is it that hard to keep up w ur friends?? NO its fucking not#taking me so long to write a post bc im still fucking helping her with her stupid dumb selfish idiotic gf omfg#just BREAK UP i literally dont fucking care just leave her if she makes u unhappy its literally online tf is she gonna do to u nothing omfg#why am i the one being punished when shes the one with the stupid dumb gf that hates her and herself i dont fucking care i js want m friend#and i cant tell any of our mutual friends cause she dont do that to them its js me so itd be like im being dramatic#and like shit i guess i am but i dont care atp thats all she ever talks to me ab like ok i get it i helped u but stop jfc#but if i said that we'd never talk again bc what fucking ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! cause im just dramatic whatever#if u cant resolve these simple problems of communication on ur own then maybe u shouldnt be in a relationship idk js my thoughts! die#sry the 1 person who knows what xactly i mean is asleep and im so tired of getting late night msgs being like hii can u help me SHUT UP#id love to help if we were actually still fucking friends but we arent so js leave me alone bruh#post#nickpost#will delete in morning my mom keeps telling me to put my phone down bt i need 2 say smfh 2 some1#i hate change i hate slight differences in my normal day to day i hate everything i hate not having smth to rely on i hate change i hate it#sry im alg now im js sick of her ass js leave bruh#nimbhe my moms yelling im tired anyway i need to js isolate myself forever no problems if im on an island alone#living my best life in the shade drinking idk water or whatever and just talking to myself bc who even needs friends right!!!!!!!!#its 11:11 make a wjsh#adding more cz whatever im deleting this ltr anyway#its so clear where i stand with everyone cause its always close but not close enough friendly but not friends and i guess its the same w her#bye im out of tags etc whatever nobody matching my freak ever never comfortable in any friendships
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i had a fun day 2 day ૮˶• ﻌ •˶ა everyone has been so nicey 2 me all day from the minute i left my house earlier ૮ ᴖﻌᴖა ♡
i went to a Retreat for the first time for work earlier 0: and I did SO good for being up since 2am it didn't even feel like it 💀
it was so chill i drove like an hour away but Away from the city so there wasn't rly traffic and the mountains r so pretty 2 drive thru (❁´◡`❁) got some rain n v low clouds and since it's autumn there's all these pretty colors. i took an edible on the way n was just jammin out n enjoying the scenery among the many safe opportunities 2 look
and then at the thing we got 2 do different ice breakers n go on decently long breaks; i got 2 hang in different groups n actually Talk w a bunch of ppl which i never have time for omg. it's nice working at a legal nonprofit, i would NOT want to do this with corporate mfs !! 😹
went around n said hii to the enbies and i ran up a hill that looked a lot smaller than it was, i made it like 80% of the way before my legs were immediately like no girl we're done !! but my brain was like but it's Right There, and i struggled 2 finish the climb but I Did !! ૮ ᴖﻌᴖა and i was so so tired i do not remember ever being that winded before 💀 getting down was so much slower n worse bc my legs were Done and when i finally made it to the bottom i laid flat on my back for like 15m, and when when i made it back to sit n chill i still need like 10 more minutes akskska. i do not b exercising !! i just wanted 2 play it looked fun and i got excited (。ノω\。)
in between things i was working on my sister's choker n kept winding up w a group of ppl around me 2 talk to about it and just talk 2 in general n the company was rly nice (❁´◡`❁) ♡ had a lot of different kinda talks 2day!! everyone is a sweetie!! some ppl r so funny n chill and i rly hope 2 get 2 talk more casually w people perhaps As Friends when i go in 👉👈
there's one girl in particular who is rly cute n sweet and i want 2 see her again ૮˶• ﻌ •˶ა when I got home finally i had 2 hop on my work laptop real quick 2 look up her name again 2 make sure i didn't forget ☝️😌 we do not work at the same office but hii i am visiting next week 🐇
yippee!!!! ૮ ᴖﻌᴖა !!!
#i think i have become an introverted extrovert at some point 0:#which is rly nice bc my social anxiety was SO bad at the beginning of the year like i didn't even know where to start skskdksk#but i kinda figured it out? but it's also just being me? idk.. much 2 think. but i made good progress#i am getting a good grade in being funny and nice and talking to people !!#i want 2 kiss someone on the forehead#omg but if there's ANYONE who deserves a kiss it's this old lady who lives a few buildings down on the way to my car#where EVERY time i see her she always has something so so sweet to tell me about how i look#today she said I'm always looking fancy (。ノω\。) ♡ and more but that's the main thing i remember besides the small talk#and the first time we met she asked me if i was a model fr and she's told me I'm cute and I'm just like PLEASE SKDKDKS#i can't fully tell if you're just really sweet or kinda 👀 at me but girl u r so sweet like hello do u Want a hug or a kiss ?? i love u !!#old ladies have a warmth they fill u with that just take the weight of Everything off ur shoulders n leave u feeling full n happy!!#bless old ladies fr!! literally my favorite people to interact with always i love u abuelas everywhere u r everything to me and i would do#anything for u !!!! i miss getting to help friends grandmas w stuff as a kid 🥺 it was just always great 2 talk 2 them and be close n on#good terms n stuff :3 i was the same way with their moms hehe. hi hello i want 2 help !! (✿ ‚‚⌒‿⌒‚‚)#my friend is being lame and acting embarrassed but i love you please talk to me i am so so interested and think you're really#cool and funny and sweet and wise actually ૮ ᴖﻌᴖა ♡ i wanna be around u if u wanna hang out#even if it's as simple as getting 2 help in the kitchen n always helping w dishes n stuff ૮˶• ﻌ •˶ა aaa ♡#omg i was late 2 the thing too and missed the breakfast and there's this sweet energetic old lady who's always like#omg u didn't get to eat? do u want this? can i get you some coffee or tea? and I'm always just like no no it's okay I'm gonna get it but#appreciate the offer and just ૮ – ﻌ–ა she is always looking out 4 me !! but she's just a sweetie like that !!#i think sharing food is a universally good way 2 make friends and it always warms my heart 2 meet ppl who r the same (❁´◡`❁)#they r always so so sweet 😭🥰 for my astrology girlies i correctly guessed that she's a taurus hehe 😼#there's another old lady who's an office manager for one of the offices n she is so soft spoken n sweet and i wish i got 2 hug her n talk#to her more 🥺 she's so far though omg i don't get to see her in person much#n e ways i work w some really warm bubbly ppl ૮˶• ﻌ •˶ა i am a happy girlie 2day!! then im going Serious Mode again tmrw 🫡#oo i get to setup like an Actual server for a rack w linux and it's being delivered 2 my place tomorrow 0: I'm excited abt it as a project#AND my new jewelry came in today along w some cute underwear we r starting this wk off strong !!!#there was so so much more frm 2day i am just rly stoned n thinking abt it all (〒﹏〒)#if u actually read all of my ramble ily ty for letting me Talk ૮˶• ﻌ •˶ა ♡
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teenist tiniest bit tired of the heterofication of gay marauders ships idk. to each their own but im… rolling my eyes a little
#theres more to life than marriage and kids#i do love a good kid fic#i love the idea of marriage#but weddings and surrogacy ? idk man why are we subscribing to heterosexual values and buying womens bodies#dont get me started on adoption 🧍#i think its just as simple that im actively against surrogacy and adoptions#i want to be married one day but i dont want a wedding#WHY ARE WE TRYING TO BE APPROVED BY HETEROSEXUALS IDK………#is this too controversial#i mean i am a man hating hairy dyke who actively goes against heterosexual values and ways of living#it does not interest me one bit#broaden your horizons!!!!! life is beautiful when you realise you’re gay and dont have to make yourself relatable or understood#’we can change the meaning of marriage from within’ nah it was built on heterosexual and christian values#<— does not apply for fostering children#thats beautiful if you mean to be a good guardian#there are worse things in life than not fitting in#wlw ships want to be mothers together❤️#mlm ships want to adopt/buy a surrogate and get married❤️#what if i killed myself
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