#We get to see what life looks like for them domestic wise sorry he’s not out being someone he’s clearly not meant to be

[eveningserenityyy]

I actually like that the mandalorian s3 gives us a character who can ultimately decide he isn’t a leader nor ready for that. He doesn’t want to be. That’s okay. And he certainly doesn’t have to be in the name of character development as people argue. He’s just a dude- he’s become a father, THAT is the development, and it’s still continuous in how he’s going to navigate that life post finale. They have their house and he’s officially his son, what’s so wrong with that???

[fortheloveofwonderland]

Me & You & Everyone We Know | Chapter 13 | S.R

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Chapter Summary - You and Spencer finally decide to go your separate ways but life keeps forcing you back together. Daisy and Penelope help Spencer take steps towards moving on.

Pairing - Single Dad! Spencer Reid / Fem! Reader

Category - hurt/comfort, angst with happy ending, smut minors DNI.

A/N - the scene of their actual break up is short because I didn’t think it needed dragging out. It’s clear why they are splitting up and I feel a quick break would have been easier on them rather than dragging everything up again.

Warnings - break ups, brief mention of canon shootings, tears, talk of depression and sadness, Spencer tries to be honest with Daisy, cute domestic moments, Spencer gets nostalgic, very brief mentions of sexual activity.

WC - 5.4k

Chapter 13 - Life Ain’t Always Beautiful

Life ain't always beautiful,

You think you're on your way,

And it's just a dead end road at the end of the day.

But the struggles makes you stronger,

And the changes make you wise,

And happiness has its own way of takin' its sweet time.

You weren’t entirely surprised to find a dishevelled looking Spencer on your doorstep. He knew he’d messed up and he knew simply calling you wasn’t enough. 

You didn’t invite him in, instead the two of you sat on the front steps of your apartment building in uncomfortable silence while you waited for him to say something. 

He stared at the pavement, not looking at you because if he did he might break down. He needed to say what he’d come here to say.

“Sorry isn’t going to cut it and I know that.” He finally spoke after several minutes of quiet. “Honestly I don’t even know what to say. I hide my feelings so well that I even forget about them sometimes. I wish it hadn’t come out the way it did but I can’t change that now.”

You stayed silent, not really having anything to say to him so you didn’t speak. Spencer sighed, his whole body going rigid as he breathed in and deflating as he breathed out. 

“I did love my wife, of course I did. And despite everything, I still love her. But that’s incredibly confusing for me because I also love you.” He glanced up at you now and you could see in his eyes the way this was tearing him apart. 

Under any other circumstances hearing Spencer Reid tell you he loved you would have elicited feelings of joy and elation. But not like, this wasn’t how you wanted to hear it. You inhaled sharply, nodding slowly at his words. 

“I think you need to deal with whatever residual emotions you’ve been harbouring for her before you jump into something else. I don’t want to be someone’s second choice, Spencer.” You chewed the inside of your cheek as a way of trying to stem your tears. 

“You deserve better than that.” He agreed. “I need to work on some things. I just wish I’d realised that before I met you.” His eyes swam with tears. “This is over isn’t it?” 

“I think it has to be.” You nodded sadly. 

“I’m so sorry I dragged you into this mess. For what it’s worth I wanted this to work out, I really did. But I think I always knew that my heart wasn’t fully mine to give away.” He managed to keep his tears at bay but they were still hindering his vision. 

“Me too.” You replied simply, not having much else to say. 

After that the two of you fell into silence on your front steps. The weight of the end hung heavy on you both. Neither of you wanted this to be over but both understood it had to be. 

You stayed like this for a while, silently relishing in the company you’d grown so fond of and knowing it would soon be over. 

After a while he left, simply waving at you as he descended the stairs to the street. You waved back and watched him go. 

The second he was out of sight you missed him. 

***

The moment he walked away was the moment he knew he’d made a mistake. 

Dragging himself down your front steps and sliding into his car, starting the engine and pulling away from the curb, caused him more pain than he’d ever felt in his whole life. 

It started as a dull ache in his chest as he merged onto the street, heading steadily down your block before taking the first left. 

It grew it from an ache to a stabbing pain by the time he was a mile or so away from your apartment building. 

By the time he pulled the car to a stop outside of Maeve and Bobby's, his entire body felt numb and as though it was on fire all at once. 

He never thought he could feel pain like this, didn’t believe anything could hurt him the way Maeve’s affair had. Yet here he was, the agony ripping through his body like a flame's fierce talons, shredding, tearing, melting away every little piece of him until he was nothing but dust and ashes. 

It reminded him of being shot, in the knee, in the neck; wherever. Except this was like being shot right through the heart over and over in quick succession, by a gun with a never ending chamber of bullets. 

It wasn’t supposed to be this way. How could losing someone he’d only known a few months be more painful than finding out of his wife’s infidelity? 

Maybe he was feeling everything all at once. Perhaps now he’d confronted his emotions towards Maeve and lost you in the space of twenty four hours the loss had combined itself. 

He wasn’t sure. All he knew was that he was in more pain than he’d ever experienced before in his entire life. He felt like he couldn’t breathe, like every small movement sent shockwaves through his entire body. 

He only realised when he switched off the engine and caught a glimpse of himself in the rear view mirror that he was crying. 

He couldn’t face his girls like this but he also couldn’t snap himself out of it. This wouldn’t do, he couldn’t be around his daughters in this state, they deserved more from him. 

He pulled his cell phone from his pocket with a shaky hand and dialled her number. It rang twice before she answered. 

“Spencer, hi.” She swallowed as she spoke. 

“Uh…could you have the girls one more night?” He tried his best to keep the emotion from his voice. 

He glanced up at the house, saw movement in a window and hoped she didn’t know he was outside. 

“Is everything ok?” Maeve’s voice had a frown to it. 

“I just…I’m not good.” He croaked. “I can’t…can’t explain. Please? I’ll pick them up from school tomorrow. I just can’t…can't see me like this.” 

There were a few moments of silence down the line and he saw the curtains twitch upstairs. A sliver of her face appeared through the crack, looking down on his car on the side of the road. 

As soon as she appeared she vanished again, the only thing telling him he hadn’t imagined it was the swaying of the curtains. 

“Ok.” She replied eventually. “Of course I can have them another night.”

“Th-thank you.” He wrestled with a sob, knowing Maeve heard it down the phone. 

“Take care of yourself Spencer.” She whispered. 

His hand holding the phone gripped it tighter for a moment while the tears heavily flooded down his face. 

“I’ll try.” He closed his eyes, slapping his other hand against the steering wheel. “Bye.” 

He hung up swiftly, stuffing the device back inside his pocket and starting up the engine. He rubbed his eyes with his palms to try and rid them of tears enough for him to drive. 

He didn’t stop crying the entire drive back to Virginia, couldn’t even if he wanted to. He parked on the drive and slumped out of the car, dragged himself up the steps and entered his home. 

Another couch cushion lay in tatters on the floor, the scruffy dog rolling around joyfully in its debris.

Spencer simply rolled his eyes and headed past the stupid mutt towards the stairs. 

It was still early but it didn’t stop him stripping down and getting into bed. He hoped it would stop the urge to go out and replenish his alcohol supply.

He’d left the door open a crack and it wasn’t all that long before he heard a snuffling by the door and then it creaked open a few inches. Seconds later a ball of grey matted fur leapt onto his bed. 

He groaned at the dog but Taco didn’t even seem to notice as he turned around several times, finding the most comfortable spot, before flopping down on the mattress. 

“This is not your bed.” Spencer’s voice was barely a whimper. “Goddamnit you’re a pain in my ass.” 

Taco huffed out a breath as if he could understand Spencer’s words and his eyes started to flutter closed. 

Spencer didn’t have the energy to forcibly remove the dog from his room so he ignored him instead, rolling away from him and onto his side. 

He tucked one arm between his pillows and closed his own eyes. Sleep would be far out of reach but nonetheless he squeezed his eyes tightly shut and hoped to be sucked into unconsciousness. 

Taco was already snoring behind him, not a care in the world to keep him awake. But for Spencer, sleep was but a pipe dream. 

He laid awake for hours, images of the last day swirling behind his closed lids. When he did eventually fall asleep it was fretful at best and didn’t last long. 

By the time the sun rose he felt less rested than he had before he went to bed. He called in sick to work, not able to face the outside world today. 

He’d have to surface eventually, pick himself up and piece himself back together in time to collect the girls from school. He had to be ok. He needed to be ok for them. 

Even if he would never be ok again for himself.

***

“Hey dad?” 

The voice snapped away from his computer screen for the first time in hours. His eyes were dry and had to blink a few times to be able to focus on his eldest daughter in the doorway of his office. 

“Hey pumpkin. Oh sorry, am I allowed to call you that?” He pushed his chair back a little as she came further into the room.

“When my friends aren’t around you can.” Daisy shrugged. 

“Fair enough.” He glanced at the clock in the corner of the screen, frowning a little at the time. “It’s almost midnight, why are you awake?” 

“Why are you awake?” She deflected. 

“Touché.” He laughed. 

She moved further into the room and dropped down into the chair on the other side of his desk. 

She’d been quiet since he’d picked the girls up from school, clearly annoyed she had to spend another night at her moms. 

“Thank you for the party by the way. I had a really great time.” She toyed with the sleeve of her pyjama top. 

“It was really all your moms idea. It’s her you should be thanking.” 

This caused Daisy to wrinkle her nose and furrow her brows. 

“I don’t believe you.” She huffed.

“I know you’re not happy with your mom right now, Daisy but that doesn’t stop her loving you. She heard you talking about a pool party, she asked grandpa Dave if you and your friends could use his house. I had nothing to do with it.” It pained him to admit as much.

Daisy huffed again, rolling her lip between her teeth the same way Spencer did when he was contemplating something. 

“I’m still mad at her.” She grumbled. 

“And that’s ok, you’re allowed to be angry, pumpkin but you’ve got to try and cut her some slack.” He leant his elbows on his desk. 

“I’ll try.” She shrugged. 

“That’s all I ask.” He smiled softly at her. 

“Mom said you were sick. Are you feeling better?” She changed the subject, clearly not wanting to prolong a conversation about her mom. 

“Kinda.” He nodded. 

“You don’t look sick.” She scrutinised him with her eyes, the eyes that were so much her mothers. 

Spencer chuckled, sitting back in his chair again. 

“You’re too smart for your own good.” He laughed, knowing she wouldn’t drop it and wondering how honest to be with her. “I guess it wasn’t so much a physical kind of sickness, more mental.” 

She furrowed her brows again, he could practically see the cogs turning in her head. 

“Dad, are you depressed?” 

“Uh…” he frowned, shaking his head. “Maybe, in a sense.” 

“I thought you said you were happy?” 

“I am, most of the time, sweetheart. But I just had a bad few days and I didn’t want you girls to see me sad.” 

“Why were you sad? Was it because of mom?” 

Goddamnit, he sighed. He always knew his brain would turn against him one day but not like this. 

He’d made a child who was way too smart for her age, not as smart as he was at fourteen but incredibly intelligent nonetheless. Daisy was curious and inquisitive and she got that from him. 

“It’s complicated.” He shrugged. 

“Adults always say that.” She rolled her eyes. “I’m fourteen, dad, I’m not a little kid.” 

He pushed himself up from the chair and rounded the desk, kneeling on the floor in front of Daisy, smoothing her hair back from her face. 

“When your mom left I focused myself on you and your sister, making sure the two of you were ok but I never really let myself grieve the loss of my marriage. I guess it’s been catching up on me lately.” He kept his hand on her cheek. 

“You miss her?” She asked softly. 

“I do.” He confessed. 

“But she hurt you.” 

“Like I said, it’s complicated. Me and your mom had some great times together Daisy. Yes she hurt me but we had some really good times. I miss those, I miss us being a family.” 

“I do too.” She agreed. “I thought your new girlfriend made you happy?” 

He tried to hide the way her words felt like a sucker punch to his gut as he sat back on his haunches.

“I…well I don’t think that’s going to work out.” 

“Did she break up with you?” Daisy pouted a little. 

“Not exactly…we, uh, it was a mutual decision. It wasn’t the right time.” He got back up to his feet and Daisy stood too. She quickly threw herself into Spencer’s arms. 

“I love you dad.” She said as she snuggled against his chest. 

“I love you too, pumpkin.” He wrapped his arms tightly around her. 

“You’ll find someone who makes you happy again.” She spoke against the fabric of his shirt. 

He exhaled a long and shaky breath as he held his daughter. Even if the rest of his life was a mess, he always had his girls. Daisy and Lily were the one thing in his life he’d done right. 

“You and your sister make me happier than you’ll ever know. The two of you are all I need.” It wasn’t strictly true, but for the most part it was. 

It would be nice to have someone to share his life with again but as long as he had Daisy and Lily then he would consider himself a very lucky man. 

When the hug ended he tucked her hair behind her ears and placed a kiss on her forehead. 

“Time for bed now, missy. It’s late and you have school in the morning.” He gently turned her by the shoulders towards the door. 

“Only if you go to bed too.” She spoke before she reached the door. 

“I’m an adult, I can go to bed when I like.” 

“You have work in the morning though, so if I have to go to bed, so do you.” She folded her arms in defiance. 

“Fine,” he rolled his eyes, not feeling much like arguing with a fourteen year old. 

He opened the door and switched out the light, motioning Daisy towards her room. As she reached for her door handle he found himself speaking again. 

“Hey Daisy?” 

“Yes dad?” She looked at him over her shoulder. 

“How would you feel about moving house? We wouldn’t go far, you wouldn’t need to change schools or anything I just think…I feel like…” he trailed off, not quite sure how to finish that sentence. 

Daisy smiled at him and came back towards him, reaching up and grasping his shoulders. 

“Mom left over a year ago, I think it’s time dad.” She spoke softly. 

“When did you get so grown up?” He sighed wistfully. “So you’d be ok with it?” 

“If it’ll make you happy again, sure.” She nodded, letting him go and heading back to her room. “G’night dad.” 

“Goodnight pumpkin.” He stayed in the corridor until she was in her room with the door closed. 

He inhaled deeply before exhaling slowly through his nose. As he turned back towards his room he heard a door open. He rolled his eyes.

“Daisy I thought we agreed…” he trailed off as he turned around and came face to face with his youngest, looking up at him through sleepy eyes. 

“I heard voices.” Lily croaked, rubbing one eye with her fist. 

“Sorry pumpkin, we didn’t mean to wake you. Go back to sleep.” 

“I need a story first.” She whined a little. 

“Fine,” Spencer sighed, knowing arguing would take longer than just reading her story. 

He headed towards her room but she was shaking her head. 

“No, in your room!” She pouted. 

Spencer grumbled under his breath but knew resistance was futile. 

“Go and grab a book and meet me in my room. Hurry though, it’s late.” He shooed her towards her room. 

She squealed excitedly before running back to her room. Spencer turned and walked to his own room, stripping off his shirt but leaving on the white tee he wore underneath. 

He was dropping to his mattress when the door opened again and Lily barrelled in, Taco close behind. 

Lily jumped on the bed next to him, handing him the book while Taco leapt up and curled into a ball at Spencer's feet. 

Lily shuffled close to him, he held his arm out for her to snuggle into him. She rested her head on his chest and he held her by her shoulders. 

With his free hand he opened the book but before he could begin, the door opened again. Spencer glanced up to see Daisy tentatively enter his room. 

“Can I join in?” She asked somewhat bashfully. 

“You’re not too old for story time?” He smiled at her. 

“No.” She shook her head. 

“Come up here then.” He patted the space on the mattress on his other side. 

Daisy beamed and ran over to the bed, throwing herself down next to Spencer, curling into him and laying on his chest much like Lily. 

He had an arm around each girl, trying to hold the book open, precariously balancing it on his stomach. 

“One story and then we’re all going to sleep ok?” He told them both. 

“Promise!” Lily giggled. 

“Me too.” Daisy agreed. 

Spencer started to read. The warmth from his daughter’s radiated through him, the feeling of them so close, their heads on his chest was such a magical feeling. 

Lily was the one who started dozing off first, he heard her breathing getting drawn out but Daisy wasn’t far behind. 

He didn’t make it to the end of the book before his eyes started fluttering too. 

It had been a particularly hard few days for Spencer, but now as he started drifting off to sleep with his girls in his arms, none of that mattered. 

As long as he had Daisy and Lily and moments like this, what more could he possibly need? 

***

Waking up with his daughters still cuddled against him started Spencer’s day off with a smile. 

They both grumbled as his alarm rudely awoke them and he had to free his arm from beneath Daisy's head so he could shut it off. 

He kissed them both on the crown before helping them up right and motioning them off to shower and dress for school. 

After showering and dressing himself he made the girls breakfast, dropped them at school before dropping Taco at the kennel and continuing the drive to work.

It was only when he was alone in his car that his happiness started to fade as he thought about the possibility of bumping into you. 

He wondered if you noticed he wasn’t there yesterday and if you did, if you’d realised it was because of you. 

He had an overwhelming urge to turn the car around and go home, maybe spend the entire day in bed wallowing again. 

But he had to see you eventually. With any luck he’d be able to avoid you. 

But apparently luck wasn’t on his side. 

He arrived at his office to find you leaning up against the wall next to his door. He kept his eyes down while he fumbled with his keys, trying to pretend he didn’t see you. 

“Feeling better?” Your tone wasn’t as sweet as usual, he heard your frustration laced in your words.

“Uh yeah. Thanks. Must have been like a twenty four hour bug thing.” He got the door unlocked and headed inside, you followed him. “Is there something I can help you with?” 

You rolled your eyes, folding your arms across your chest. 

“Do you read your emails?” You clucked, clearly not happy about having to converse with him. 

“Yes?” He frowned. 

“Clearly not.” You scoffed. “Monroe is out sick, like actually sick not whatever you claim to have been. He’s gonna be gone for at least a week. So I’m your new TA for the time being.” 

“I don’t need a TA.” He shook his head. 

“Too bad. I’m not letting our break up get in the way of my career. So get over it.” You spat. 

“Super,” Spencer rounded his desk. “Just super.” 

So much for avoiding you. 

He slid into the chair behind his desk and you took a seat on the other side. He slid a stack of paper towards you without looking at you. 

“You can read over these papers until class starts. I haven’t gotten around to grading them and I’d like to hear your input.” He spoke, grabbing his own pile. 

You nodded but didn’t speak, picking up the first paper from the stack and starting to read. Spencer did the same only he couldn’t concentrate with you sitting on the other side of his desk. 

He felt like he was being punished by the universe. What had he done that was so terrible that this was his cosmic retribution? 

He sighed to himself, turning away from the papers and switching on his computer. He pulled up his work emails and low and behold there was one waiting for him from yesterday regarding Monroe’s absence and your appointment to be his TA in the interim. 

He flicked through a few more emails before pulling up the web browsing and typing in the address for a local realtor. 

He looked up homes in his neighbourhood and price range while you continued to read through student papers. 

He didn’t look at you once. And you returned the favour. 

***

By the end of the week Spencer was more than ready for the weekend. He’d had to spend nearly every minute of his work days with you and the two of you had only exchanged a handful of words. 

On Friday afternoon he sent you home with a pile of papers he’d already graded for you to look over. 

Spending that much time around you and not being able to talk to you like he used to was as exhausting as it was heartbreaking. Whenever you looked at him it was with disdain, when you spoke he heard the hurt in your voice. 

Spencer wanted nothing more than to be the person to take away your pain, not be the one to cause it. Simply being work colleagues wasn’t enough. 

But he’d made his bed and he had to lie in it. 

With any luck Monroe would be back on Monday and if he wasn’t then there was only one week left of the semester anyway. He just had to make it through one more week.

Perhaps if he wasn’t seeing you everyday, when he could put some distance between you for the summer, it would help to mend his shattered heart. Maybe by the time September rolled around the two of you would be able to be friends. 

As much as he would miss you during the summer he knew it was for the best, he needed to heal and he needed to focus on his girls. 

Just one more week. 

By the time the weekend came he’d already had a few realtors around to value his home and on Saturday Lily spent the afternoon with Kristy and the Simmons two girls while Spencer went to look at potential new houses. 

He’d tried to get Daisy to stay with her sister but she’d been adamant about helping him choose their new home. Admittedly he did need all the help he could get. 

So with that in mind he’d asked Penelope to come along too. The bubbly blonde had been more than happy to house hunt with him and spend more time with her goddaughter. 

The three of them looked at six houses in the neighbourhood and each one of them Spencer had turned his nose up at. Every positive thing Penelope or Daisy had to say about them, Spencer countered with something negative.

After the sixth house he’d snubbed, they went for coffee before the final viewing of the day. Penelope and Daisy looked, quite rightly, fed up, while they drank their respective drinks and ate slices of pie. 

“Remind me again what was wrong with number three?” Garcia asked, snapping Spencer’s attention away from the printout he’d been looking at for the next and final house they were going to see.

“It was too…bright.” He shrugged, picking up his mug and taking a sip of coffee. 

“What’s wrong with bright?” Daisy spoke with a mouthful of blueberry pie. 

“It was airy, there’s nothing wrong with it being airy.” Garcia stirred her tea. 

“What about that last one? The bedrooms were huge! So much bigger than my bedroom now.” Daisy grinned. 

“The yard was tiny.” Spencer scoffed.

“The yard was not tiny.” Penelope rolled her eyes. 

“It’s smaller than my yard now. And we have a dog, remember?” Spencer looked back at his printout. 

“You have a very small dog who does not need a huge yard.” Penelope sighed deeply. “Spence, what’s really going on? All six of those houses were lovely.” 

Spencer looked back up and swallowed, glancing between Penelope and Daisy. Daisy huffed out a breath, knowing exactly what that look meant. 

He had something to say that he didn’t want to say in front of her. She got the hint, pushed her chair back and stood up.

“I need to use the bathroom.” She didn’t, but if Penelope could talk some sense into him maybe she wouldn’t have to keep looking at houses with her dad until she was fifty years old. 

Daisy took her leave and Spencer sighed as he watched her go. 

“I know Daisy seems ok with this, but is she really? And Lily? I haven’t stopped to ask Lily about this. Am I really going to pull them away from their childhood home? They grew up in that house, I just don’t know if this is a good idea. I don’t think they’re ready.” He shook his head, picking his coffee mug back up. 

“They aren’t ready, or you aren’t?” Garcia raised an eyebrow at him over her bright blue framed glasses.

“Why wouldn’t I be ready? It was my idea.” He scoffed, looking away from her which told her he was lying. 

“Spence, it’s ok to be unsure about this. It’s a big deal, moving out of that house that you and Maeve brought together.” She spoke softly, she hoped encouragingly. 

When Spencer’s eyes landed back on her they looked a little misty. 

“It shouldn’t be a big deal.” He croaked. “She cheated on me, I should want to get out of that house, right?” 

“Emotions are complicated, boy wonder.” She shrugged meekly. 

His lip twitched a little at the corner at her use of his nickname. She’d called him it since they’d met, when he was a fresh faced twenty something. Now in his mid forties with two kids, it felt strange still being called it. But he enjoyed it anyway. 

“If I move,” he took a sip of coffee, perhaps trying to buy himself some time. “I have to pack up that house, go through all the memories. There are boxes of stuff in the attic, photo albums, Maeve kept boxes of ticket stubs and receipts from movies and dinners we went to that I’m pretty sure are up there somewhere. All the kids baby stuff from back when things were good between us. 

And then there’s other stuff. In the kitchen there’s a red wine stain behind the fridge. We only moved it there to cover the mark. It was our eighth wedding anniversary and JJ had the girls and we came home from dinner and got a little…frisky. I got carried away and spilled her wine everywhere. 

In the living room there’s a mark on the wall behind the coat stand from where I’d just gotten home from work one day, back when I worked at the BAU and the kids were asleep. She, uh, surprised me by dropping to her knees while I was still in the doorway and I reached out to grab something and knocked the coat rack over, which in turn knocked over a photo and marked the wall.

There’s scuffs on the wall behind the headboard from…well I think that’s pretty explanatory. There’s other things too, not all sexual. There’s a dent behind a painting in the hall from where she threw her shoe at me during a fight, stuff like that. 

But it’s all memories, you know? Memories I thought we’d look back on together when we were old and Daisy and Lily had moved out. I never expected it to be like this, and the thought of moving out and having to face all that on my own…”

He finally trailed off, surprising Garcia with his honesty. She hadn’t expected any of that, thought he might skirt around the issue. For a moment she found herself speechless by what he’d said, but she forced herself to speak. 

“You’re not on your own, Spencer.” She reached across the table and put her hand on top of his. “Just because you left the BAU, doesn’t make us any less family. We will all be there to help you if that’s what you need. You’re never on your own, ok?” 

Spencer nodded, blinking rapidly to try and clear his eyes of tears. Daisy skulked back over, sliding back into her chair and he removed his hand from Garcia’s.

“Everything ok?” Daisy asked, tucking back into her pie. 

“Everything’s just fine, pumpkin.” Spencer looked at the printout and balled it up in his hands, making both Daisy and Penelope frown.

“What are you doing?” Garcia grabbed the paper from his hand.

“I don’t need it.” He shook his head. You liked the last house, Daisy? You think your sister will like it?” 

“We’d both get bigger bedrooms.” Daisy nodded. “And it’s super close to school, I could walk from there. And Meredith only lives two blocks away.” 

“Ok.” He took a sip of his coffee. “Then I’ll call the realtor and I’ll make an offer.” 

Penelope and Daisy exchanged a look of slight disbelief and confusion. When they looked back at Spencer, he had a determined look on his face. 

He finished his coffee and stood up, pulled his phone out of his pocket and headed towards the cafe door. Daisy and Penelope watched him go.

“What did you say to him, Aunty Penny?” Daisy gasped a little, looking back at her aunt. 

“He just needed a little reminder that his family had his back.” Garcia smiled, taking Daisy’s hand and giving it a soft squeeze. “Do me a favour though?”

“What’s that?” 

“Just keep an eye on your dad for me. He pretends to be strong for you and your sister but he’s a lot more fragile than you’ll ever know. Just keep an eye on him, ok?” 

“Ok.” Daisy nodded, watching her dad through the window as he paced the street with his phone to his ear. 

She knew what her aunt was saying was true, her dad was fragile even if he’d never admit it. But as long as she was his daughter, he would never be alone, she would make sure of it. 

After everything he’d done for her in her life, it was the least she could do to return the favour. 

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[dannydanoninoo]

So side note it's 2 am and my fucking Huntlow brainrot doesn't let me sleep so here's a small fic /prompton Willow's POV about... certain things we saw at the NYCC teaser💛💚

OR... Basically me hyperfixating over this frame and writing something BECAUSE LOOK AT THOSE HEART EYES PEOPLE

(no beta read bc this literally came out of my sleep deprived brain right now so sorry for any mistakes)

"Have you ever seen the rain?"

If someone had told Willow Park six months ago that she was going to become best friends with a human, and that scenario would lead to a series of events where she'd end up fighting the Emperor of the Isles (who got turned into goop by a purple child) and being on stuck on said human's house for weeks... Willow would probably had laughed at that someone's face.

But oh well... life has indeed unexpected paths for all of us I guess...

And yet somehow, that is not the weirdest part of everything her life has come to be

She, once Half-a-Witch Willow who had no friends and was scared of mostly everything had come up to make her own Flyer Derby team (just like her dads but she doesn't want to get too deep into that train of thought), fixed her friendship with Amity, had now a group of friends who loved her and who she loved so much and also had fallen for BEFRIENDED the kid behind the Golden Guard mask, better known as Hunter (or by that cute false name Caleb Jasper Bloodwilliams she did liked so much).

Now how did the boy ended up becoming such an important addition of her duo with Gus? She has no idea.

But it feels like it was something destined to happened, it's... natural. Just seeing him protecting the youngest boy, following his excitable shenanigans over human artifacts, with how much love he talks to Flapjack (and Clover the back of her mind screams) and just seeing him right now, under the human rain soaked in mud but laughing alongside Gus and Vee gives her heart a jittery feeling over how bright and beautiful the boy in front of her is.

So, she doesn't think twice when Camilla gives her the human camera and she snaps as much pictures of this moment as she can.

Titan knows this is a rare view considering the last few weeks (and in the case of Hunter maybe years, if the other night when she caught him cutting his own hair is any indication)

And yet, despite not knowing what's is going on with him and why he was so desperate to look different, Willow can't help but admire the strength her blonde has to step up and continue growing into Hunter himself and out of the whole Golden Guard title.

Also okay, she's not dumb and knows Luz and Gus might know more about what Hunter deal is, but she also know how important is the boy to her, how in the Day of Unity she was ready to do anything to keep him standing despite the draining spell, bit also how she would do anything to keep that image from happening ever again and be there to make sure he had more days like this.

It was just what she'd promised the day she adopted Clover: she will do everything to be strong and wise to protect the people she loves, even if that means "kill" an alarm clock for Vee or being there for the boy she's infatuated BEFRIENED! to cut his own hair at 3 am, holding him in his sleep, or simply silently showing she'll support him with whatever he hasn't told them yet whenever he's ready to do so. 

And who knows? Based on that soft toothy smile he's giving her right now, she could get another shot at cutting his hair, under nicer and much more domestic circumstances... Heh, it sounds like a cute fantasy but at least right now, under the non-boiling rain, and running towards his arms (and Gus' and Vee's) everything seems a little less impossible.

[poisoned-peppermint]

Part 4 of incorrect quotes because i feel obligated to make more due to the sheer number of people who liked it

Dream: My dearest beloved fuckos, is a fun, gender-neutral way to begin a speech

George: See also, esteemed bastards

Bad: Gentlefolk, Ferals, and Domesticated cryptids. 

Sapnap: My fellow yees and haws

~~~~~~~

Techno:Hey I know skyrim is revered as a classic but are we just going to ignore the fact that the entire game only had like 3 voice actors

Wilbur:Stop right there criminal cum

Techno:My ancestors are smiling at me, bastard, can you say the same

~~~~~~~

Foolish:When's your bedtime :)

Purpled: Whenever I next collapse in purely up to the gods

~~~~~~

Ranboo:Human skin is a fursuit for skeletons 

Tubbo: i’m going to debone you like a fucking trout

~~~~~~

Bad:You’re enough

Bad: love yourself!!!!!!! or suffer my wrath!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dream:And by wrath I mean love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bad:no I mean wrath!!!!! You reading this, if you don't love yourself I’ll beat you with a stick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~~~~~~~

Bad:I hope everyone is today well! And tomorrow!!!! After that you’re on your own.

~~~~~~

Bad:what am I supposed to do all day while you’re at work

Skeppy:I don’t know, what do you normally do while I’m gone

Bad: wait for you to get back

~~~~~~

Velvet:For my next stunt, I’ll wake up at 5am on the day I can sleep in

Ant:Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.

Velvet:Early to bed and early to rise makes me a massive bitch

~~~~~~

Tubbo: 3:23 AM make a wish

Ranboo: I wish that you would go to sleep

Tuddo: Yeah well I wish I grew an inch taller every day as you get an inch shorter until you’re as flat as as a piece of paper and I’m 11 feet tall

Ranboo: You’re going to die of a mixture of skeletal instability and heart disease.

Tubbo: Yeah but I’ll look good while doing it.

~~~~~~

Bad:Disrespect me again and I’ll determine your bodies resonant frequency and play a jaunty horn solo that boils your miserable organs inside out 

~~~~~~

Quackity: If I were dating you?  Well, heh. Let’s just say horses wouldn't be called horses anymore

Karl: hey what the honk does this mean…..I’m shaking what does this mean!

~~~~~~

Skeppy: Are you ok?

Bad wrapped in a burrito blanket drinking his 6th cup of coffee: Yes, this is exactly what mental stability looks like

~~~~~~

Sam: My hands are cold

Ponk: *holds their hands*

Ponk: better?

Sam: My lips are cold too

~~~~~~

George at dream’s funeral: can I have a moment alone with them?

Sapnap: of course *leaves*

George leaning over dream’s casket: Now listen, I know you’re not dead.

Dream: yeah no shit

~~~~~~

Skeppy, jokingly: I should have Bad kill you for that.

Bad, peering around the corner: Who do I need to kill?

Skeppy: Wh- no, I was just kidding around.

Bad, pulling out a switchblade: No, who’s bothering you

~~~~~~

Bad *watching the news*: Some idiot tried to fight a squid at the aquarium.

Skeppy *covered in ink*: Maybe the squirt was being a dick.

~~~~~~

Peacock: *spreads feathers at Bad*

Skeppy: It’s trying to attract a mate

Bad, extremely confused: *shyly lifts top*

Skeppy: No!

~~~~~~

Sapnap: Karl, do you eat olives? My dad wants to know

Karl: No, I hate olives. Olives are the spawn of satan. I hate olives so much my mom forced me to live in Mount olive for the rest of my childhood as a curse from the olive gods. Do you understand how much olives have ruined my life? I'm so offended that you asked me that have some consideration for people who have been abused by olives please!

Sapnap: K A R L ……….they’re just olives!!?

Karl: JUST OLIVES EXCUSE!

~~~~~~

Tommy: If you’re bored you can simply close your eyes and rotate a cow in your mind. It’s free and the cops can’t stop you

~~~~~~

Wilbur: is there anyone even named sheldon irl?

Tubbo: my class turtle from 6th grade :)

Wilbur: that’s a turtle

Tubbo: When god sings with his creations, will a turtle not be part of the choir?

~~~~~~

Ranboo: No bcuz why do ppl like salad?? What’s so good about it

Tubbo: chew leaf like god intended

Ranboo: No

Tubbo: Abandon god and see what he does next time you lift your hands in prayer

~~~~~~~

Tommy: Guys, there’s a monster under my bed and it’s really ugly.

Wilbur, on the bottom bunk: Honestly, fuck you.

~~~~~~

Quackity: So according to the cease and desist order I got, apparently you can’t ‘legally’ be a lawyer if your license is ‘cut out of a cereal box’.

~~~~~~

Puffy: If you had too, what would you give up food or sex?

Bad: Sex.

Skeppy: Seriously, answer faster.

Bad: I’m sorry honey, when they said sex I wasn’t thinking about sex with you.

Skeppy: It’s like a giant hug.

Puffy: Ant, what about you? What would you give up sex or food?

Ant: Food.

Puffy: Okay, how about sex or dinosaurs?

Ant: ……...Oh my God it’s like the movie Sophie’s Choice.

Gumi: What about you Velvet? What would you give up sex or food?

Velvet: Oh… um… I don’t know, it’s too hard.

Gumi: No, you gotta pick one.

Velvet: Um, food… no, sex… no, food…sex… food. Ugh! I don’t know! I want both! I- I want Antfrost on bread!

~~~~~~~

Tommy, holding a gun: If the conspiracies about life being a simulation are true WHOEVERS CONTROLLING MY SIM I JUST WANNA TALK.

~~~~~~~

Bad: Why are you guys acting like this?

Boomer: Oh, we’re not acting. We really are like this.

~~~~~~

Techno: Dream has only knocked me out three times this week. Our friendship is really developing.

~~~~~~

Tommy: You’re pathetic!

Wilbur: You’re pathetic-er!

Techno: You’re both losers.

~~~~~~

Bad: I wish I could help you, but I shorn’t.

Skeppy: Bad, please!

Bad: What part of shorn’t don’t you understand?

~~~~~~

Tubbo: Why did you leave Wrestlemania on for Michal?

Ranboo: They need to learn how to protect us.

~~~~~~

Antfrost: I regret getting dragged into your heterosexual tomfoolery.

~~~~~~

Bad: Strawberry milk doesn’t taste like strawberry OR milk.

Skeppy: Go the fuck to sleep Bad!

Bad: LANGUAGE!!

~~~~~~

Ranboo: Tubbo, please calm down.

Tubbo: I asked for two large fries!

Tubbo: *dumps fries onto table*

Tubbo: But all they did was give me a MILLION FUCKING LITTLE ONES!

~~~~~~

Bad: That was the worst throw ever. Of all time.

Skeppy: Not my fault. Somebody put a wall in the way.

~~~~~~

Wilbur: When you’ve been on the internet for as long as I have, you develop thick skin.

Tommy: Navy blue isn’t your color.

Wilbur: Navy blue brings out my eyes you prick! *Chases after Tommy*

~~~~~~

Bad: *Pulls a glass a water from out of nowhere*

Puffy: Where did you get that?.

Bad: My pocket.

Puffy: How do you keep a glass of water in your pocket?

Bad: Skills.

~~~~~~

Tubbo: I will come to your house after work and knock on your window at 11 AM. You will not open the curtains, knowing full well what awaits you, but the knocking only grows louder, more demanding. Finally it stops, your ears ringing. You nervously let out a breath you didn't know you were holding. You're safe now. Minutes pass by and you start to relax. And then you hear a knock at the front door. Like before, you stay still and clutch the blankets around you. You try to tell your self that it's just your imagination. Maybe the milk man? But why would he come so late? Everyone else was asleep, save for Naomi who was playing video games down stairs. To your relief, the knocking stops after a few. Minutes and you breath easy once more. Until you hear a knock on your bedroom door. You don't move. It's just your imagination. She isn't here. She can't be here. You tell yourself, shutting your eyes and willing yourself to sleep. The knock comes again, but with horror you realize that it came from the closet inside your room. You know that you have no choice. You get up, climbing out of bed with shaking limbs. You walk to the closest, trembling, and holding back the tears threatening to spill over your porcelain cheeks. You hesitate with your hand over the closet handle. Maybe it's just your imagination? She's not really there. You can go to sleep and laugh it off in the morning. Your naive thoughts are cut off by another, more demanding knock on the closet door, inches from your face. You know what you have to do. You open the closet door, and there she stands. Chuck e cheese, the mouse looms over you in the dim light. It's soulless eyes boor into you. It raises its arms, and you flinch as it begins to floss at lightning speed. Tears spill over your cheeks. This is the last thing you'll ever see.

Ranboo: Wait, Chuck e cheese’s pronouns are she/her? Trans Chuck e cheese? Good for her.

~~~~~~~~

Bad: Would you like something to drink? *They opened the fridge* We have water, milk, juice, spiders, Dr. Pepper-

Quackity: Spiders?

Bad: Spiders it is then.

Quackity: No, that wasn’t-

*But they were already pouring him a brimming glass of spiders…

~~~~~~

Puffy : Make her pussy wet not her eyes.

Velvet : Make his dick hard not his life.

Punz : Break her bed not her heart.

Skeppy : Play with his boobs not his feelings. 

Ant : Get on his dick not his nerves.

Bad : Always salt your pasta while boiling it.

~~~~~~~

Wilbur: Bet you can’t eat 15 crayons!

Tommy: Bet you I can!

Phil: *sips coffee, checks to make sure 911 is still on speed dial, and goes back to reading the paper*

~~~~~~~

Ant: We need a way to lure in new customers?

Ponk: Maybe we could have some fun, interactive events!

Skeppy: Badboyhalo bath water.

Bad: ABSOLUTELY NOT!

~~~~~~~~

Fundy: GET BACK HERE YOU DUMB FUCK!

Wilbur: LET ME RUN FROM THE CONSEQUENCES OF MY ACTIONS!

~~~~~~~~

Bad: Mint is just cold spicy.

Pummel party Squad: …

Gumi: What the actual fuck is wrong with you.

~~~~~~~~

Quackity: Isn’t it amazing how I can feel so bad and still look so good?

~~~~~~~

Tommy: Why does my arm shake and turn bright red when I’m eating dirt?

Phil:

Phil: Why are you eating dirt?

Tommy: Did I ask you if I should eat dirt? No, so answer my question.

~~~~~~~

Tubbo: I wish I could control wasps and bees to sting my enemies.

Quackity: You’re too young to have enemies.

Tubbo: You don’t even know.

~~~~~~~~

Skeppy: Is there a cactus where your heart should be?

Puffy: What’s up your ass this morning!

Bad: *walks in* …Hi!!

Puffy: Hmm… nevermind.

Skeppy: WAIT NO!

~~~~~~~~

Skeppy: Ha! Don’t you know the trappers trap can trap the trapper?

Skeppy: I must be losing it, I’m quoting Bad.

~~~~~~~

Skeppy: Bad, I sense hostility.

Bad: Good, because I hate you

~~~~~~~

Bad: Are you a painting?

Skeppy: What-?

Bad: Because I want to pin you to a wall.

Skeppy: OH GOD I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO SAY YOU WANTED TO HANG ME OR SOMETHING-

~~~~~~

Tommy: You’re giving me a sticker?

Phil: Not just a sticker. That is a sticker of a kitty saying “me-wow!”

Tommy: I’m not a preschooler.

Phil: Fine, I’ll take it back-

Tommy: I earned this, back off!

~~~~~~

Dream, sweating: George, there’s something I need to ask you-

George: Finally! You’re proposing!

Dream: How’d you know?

George: Dream, you’ve dropped the ring five times during dinner.

George: I even picked it up once

~~~~~~~~

*Bad and Skeppy looking at a locked gate into a park*

Bad: Aw. :(

Skeppy: You know what they say.

Bad: Please don’t-

Skeppy: BE GAY DO CRIME! *hops gate*

Bad: Frick-

~~~~~~~~

let me know if ya’ll want more <3

[1-800-gaygentsofshield]

you + me = ? | n.r.

summary: after the war you and Natasha settle down, deciding to start a family in your cozy little home. The problem is though, how many times can hope be ignited before it fully burns out?

warnings: (trying to get pregnant) reader, canon/sterile Nat, swearing, Nat and you cry, post-endgame, sprinkle of angst with a very fluffy ending

word count: 4,016

im having baby fever rn im so sorry

-flashback, pre-endgame-

"I wanna have a family." Your voice is barely above a whisper as you both look up at the night sky, laying in the garden atop the Avengers compound. "What?" Nat asks softly, breaking out of her trance as she looks at you. You're laying on her chest and her arm is wrapped your back, Nat's other arm folded up behind her head.

"I wanna have a family, with you." You repeat yourself, making eye contact with your girlfriend as her brows furrow. "Y/n.." Nat's voice is hesitant and panic floods your chest, your eyes widening as you move to sit up. "Oh my god I'm so sorry, that was so quick-" You apologize quickly as you avoid Natasha's gaze, the redhead sitting up with you.

You've dated Natasha for two years but everything has been slow, knowing how the assassin will close herself off if you try and move too fast (emotion wise).

"Hey Y/n no." Nat says softly as she looks at your side profile, a soft frown forming on her face as she sees you. "That's not the reason why." She says as she gently turns your head to face her, fingertips delicately grabbing your chin. "I do want to have a family with you, moya lyubov'..it's just that I can't." Nat whispers and you finally lock eyes with her, seeing the pain and sadness on her face. "What do you mean?' You ask carefully and she sighs, waiting a beat before deciding to tell you. "In the Red Room me and all of my other group mates were sterilized..it was like a sick graduation ceremony that prevented us from having a family of our own." She tells you and hurt immediately grips at your heart, seeing Nat avert her gaze for a moment.

"Why?" You question and she purses her lips together, one of your hands rubbing her knee gently. "So we would never have any distraction from our mission..so that our only purpose in life was to kill and be used as a weapon." Disgust drips from Nat's voice at the last part, your soft hands on her wrist bringing her back to reality. "Im so sorry Nat, I shouldn't have anything I didn't know-" You start to apologize again but Nat stops you with a soft shake of her head, a bittersweet smile on her face. "Don't apologize, Y/n. I'm the one who should be sorry for not being able to give you the family that you deserve." She says and now it's your turn to shake your head, grabbing Nat's hands and caressing them gently. "Its alright baby." You smile gently before an idea pops into your head, your eyes lighting up and Nat gives you a look of curiosity.

"Besides.." You start, gently tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "If you really..truly..wanted a family with me, there could still be other options. Like adopting or getting a surrogate..or I could get pregnant instead." You suggest and Natasha's eyes light up like the stars in the night sky, a small laugh escaping your lips as you see the excitement on her face.

"Really?! You'd do that?" She asks and you nod your head, giving your girlfriend a soft kiss before laughing. "Mmhm, but you'd have to put a ring on it first, Miss Romanoff." You giggle and Nat wraps her arms around you again, both of you laying back down on the blanket. "Im planning to, future Mrs.Romanoff."

-present day, post-endgame-

You nervously pace around the bathroom as you wait for the three minutes to be up, Natasha sitting on the edge of the bathtub and observing you walk back and forth. The pregnancy test is laying by the sink and you can’t help but glance at it every few seconds, not having felt this nervous since battling Thanos and his army. You’ve faced gods, powerful Titans, super soldiers, but you’re sure this the most nerve wracking thing you’ve ever had to do. Once the timer on Natasha’s phone goes off, you practically jump towards the sink, Natasha leaning forward a bit more on the bathtub. Picking up the white and pink pregnancy test, you nervously turn it over in your hands, eyes scanning the small window for the results.

Natasha doesn’t even have to ask for the results when she sees your shoulders slump and your face drop, quickly getting up from the bathtub to wrap you up in her arms. Hugging you from behind, she can see the negative test in your hands, gently kissing your cheek when you don’t say anything. “It’s okay baby, we can try again.” She says softly and you shake your head, slowly placing the test down and closing your eyes.

“Nat, what if somethings wrong with me?” You whisper and her arms hug you closer, tears pooling under your eyelids in frustration. “Nothing is wrong with you malysh.” Natasha reassures you and you turn in her arms, releasing a shaky breath as you press your face into her neck. “Three times Nat..three fucking times..” You sigh and she only holds you closer, knowing how much hope the both of you had for this one. “I know, I know.” Nat hums softly as she rocks the two of you back and forth gently, feeling the hope starting to dwindle from you. “What if we just weren’t meant to have a biological children? What if we weren’t meant to have lives after the war?” You question out loud and Natasha pulls back, gently tilting your chin up so you can look her in the eyes. “Hey no, don’t say that. We were meant to have a family Y/n, biological or not.” Nat takes a pause to brush some hair out of your face.

“Let’s try one more time, okay? And if that doesn’t work then we can look into other options.” She continues and you think for a moment, not knowing if you could go through the hope and pain again. “Okay.” You whisper softly and Nat nods her head. “Okay.” She echos you before placing a gentle kiss on your forehead, pulling you back in for a hug.

————

Nat’s leg is bouncing up and down as she watches the timer tick down, only ten more seconds before you can check. This is the last try, all or nothing. You’re too anxious to pace this time, instead opting to sit next to Natasha and leaning into her as you watch her leg bounce. “You know..whatever happens, I love you.” Nat says softly when she sees you blankly stare at her knee, lost in thought about what’s going to happen. “I love you too.” You reply equally as soft as you look up at your wife, grabbing her hand and intertwining them slowly.

Leaning into each other, you both share a soft kiss, love shining through the small interaction. You both only pull away when the timer dings, Natasha rubbing your back as you sigh and get up. It feels like time slows down as you walk towards the sink, heart pounding in your chest as you reach out to grab the test. The bathroom is silent as you pick it up and flip it over, looking at the little window for the results. You’re silent as you look at the results, body frozen in place as you stare at the test. Natasha’s brows furrow and she gets up, sighing as she rubs her temples.

“Baby I’m so sorry-” “It’s positive.” You interrupt Nat midway through her sentence, your voice in disbelief as you see those two pink lines. “What?” Natasha asks, unsure if she heard you right. “It’s positive.” You repeat as you turn to face her, pregnancy test in hand as you smile from ear to ear. “You’re pregnant?” Natasha asks, almost in disbelief as she stares at you. “I’m pregnant.” You nod your head and Natasha immediately sweeps you up in her arms, hugging you right and picking you up from the ground. “Holy shit! We’re gonna have a baby!” Nat laughs as she spins you around, joyful giggles falling from your lips as you cling onto your wife.

“Oh my god we’re gonna have a baby.” Nat breathes out as she comes to a stop, quickly putting you down once the realization hits her brain. “Shit, you’re pregnant we need to be careful.” She says and you only laugh, pulling her down a bit to kiss her. “You don’t need to be that a careful dummy, but yes..I’m pregnant.”

————

“Tony gave us an iron man onesie.” You laugh as you hold up the tiny piece of clothing, Natasha grinning as she watches you. Even though the announcement was made a week ago, the gifts have been steadily pouring in, Tony insisting that he pays for the majority of the things that are needed for the new arrival.

He paid for the crib, the high chair, the car seat, most of the nursery, and all the bottles and toys a newborn could ask for. Pepper had a huge part in it too, having experience since bringing Morgan into the world. “That man is self centered.” Natasha laughs as she walks over to where you’re sitting, her heart full of love as she kneels down next to you.

“Mmhm.” You hum in agreement as you fold the article of clothing away, Natasha handing you the next gift. You’re about sixteen weeks along and you’re already showing, a small baby bump forming from your midsection. You both decided to wait until the second trimester to tell the rest of the team, wanting to enjoy the first few months in peace.

Natasha watches you wordlessly as you open a gift from Steve, a smile tugging on her lips as she sees the captain america pacifier. “I love you so much.” She blurts out randomly and your head turns to face her, a smile on your face as you gently kiss her.

“You’ve gone soft Romanoff.” You tease and she only laughs, gently kissing you again. “I blame you, you’ve made me domestic.” She grins and you roll your eyes, placing the gift to the side.

————

As the pregnancy goes along, you start to notice Natasha’s lack of touch, the redhead only going as far as running her hands through your hair or holding your shoulders. You have no idea what has gotten into her and you're determined to investigate, missing the way Natasha used to spoon and cuddle you all day.

Your questions were finally answered when one day you and Natasha were watching TV in bed, the redhead's arm slung around your shoulder as you lean into her. When the commercial break finally came on, you turned your head to look at your wife, curiosity written all over your face. "Why don't you cuddle me anymore, Nat?" You ask softly and she looks at you with confusion, lowering down the volume on the TV. "What do you mean? I cuddle you all the time baby." She says and you shake your head, reaching up and gently toying with her hair.

"Ever since I've gotten pregnant you've treated me like I could break at any moment, what are you so afraid of?" You question and Natasha sighs, glancing at her lap for a moment before answering. "With these hands I've done some awful things Y/n..things too horrific to say out loud. I feel like if I touch you or the baby I'll just ruin it, or hurt you..like everything else in my life." Nat confesses softly and your heart melts at how scared your wife is, knowing how much she's struggled with her past and with the red in her ledger. "Natasha Romanoff." You whisper, gently grabbing her hands to put them in between the two of you. "You are the kindest," You start, gently kissing her knuckle. "Most caring." another kiss, "Most selfless" another kiss, "Person I've ever met" another kiss. "And I know, with my whole heart and soul, you would never do anything to hurt me or the baby." You look up at her and gently rub your knuckles over the back of her hands. "So please stop acting like you will. These are the hands that I love, the hands that will raise our child, they're strong and secure, so stop thinking otherwise." You finish as you wordlessly move both your hands towards your belly, gently placing Natasha's hands over the bump.

The redhead is stunned as your hands rest over hers, the baby suddenly kicking. A wide smile spreads across your face as you both look down at your belly, the baby never having kicked before. "That was the first time they've ever kicked." You inform Natasha and you could see her still processing that fact. "That's our baby?" She asks softly and you laugh, nodding your head. "Mmhm, that's our baby. They recognized their mama." You say fondly as the baby kicks again, Natasha's heart bursting with warmth as she looks at you.

Slowly, Natasha moves to lay down on the bed, resting her head right beside your bump and holding it gently. "Hi malen'kiy golub'." She whispers softly, your hand coming down to gently play with her hair. You smile as you watch Natasha gently cuddle with your bump, knowing without a doubt that she's going to be a great mother.

-----

Placing the stuffed animals down on the table, you turn to look at Natasha, a giggle coming from your lips as you walk over to her. "What?" Nat grins as she turns to face you, putting the paintbrush down to the side.

"You're a mess." You laugh as you rub some pastel green paint from her cheek, both of you deciding that the nursery would be painted a light grey with a pastel green accent wall. "I'm still hot though." She teases and you only roll your eyes, cupping her face as you gently kiss her.

"Yeah yeah you're always hot." You laugh and Natasha looks around the room, grinning at the stack of Avenger's themed stuffed animals your team gave you. "They're all trying to be known as the cool uncle aren't they?" She asks softly and you nod your head, knowing that whatever Avenger your child takes after will forever have that bragging right.

"Let them have their fun, they're happy for us." You smile and Nat only sighs, shaking her head with a small smile on her face.

-----

You feel like Natasha was more anxious than you when you went into labour, your water breaking in the middle of the night. There wasn't any dramatic screaming or freaking out, you just calmly pushed the sheet back and let out a soft "huh" as you saw the damp bedsheets.

"Oh, okay we're doing this." You say before turning on the light, acting like it was any other day as you gently shake Natasha awake. "Nat, baby wake up." You whisper softly as Natasha stirs, squinting at the light once her eyes opened. "Y/n? What's wrong?" Nat mumbles sleepily as she rubs the sleep from her eyes, seeing you in a sitting up position.

"My water broke." You say and it takes a second for the words to process in Natasha's brain, the redhead suddenly sitting up and fully awake. "What? Okay okay it's happening. It's happening." Nat says as she pushes the sheets off herself, her mind immediately going to all the books she's read over the past nine months. You've already packed your hospital bags a few weeks in advance so you aren't too stressed about it, only needing to change and grab a few extra things. Natasha, on the other hand, is working on full overdrive, pulling on sweatpants and making sure everything is in order.

"Natasha, baby." You say as you gently grab her arm, needing your wife to slow down if you're going to survive the next few days. "You need to calm down my love." You say softly as you hold onto her shoulders, making the redhead look at you and take a few deep breaths. "Okay..okay. I'm sorry. I'm just nervous." Natasha admits and you nod your head, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"It's okay to be nervous Nat, you just need so slow down. We haven't even gotten to the hospital yet." You laugh softly and she nods her head, waiting a few more moments before stepping back slowly. "Okay, let's have a baby."

---

Your head is resting back against Natasha's shoulder as she acts like a backrest to you, allowing you to grip onto her hand when your contractions hit. Nat has been nothing but supportive the entire time, humming reassuring words into your ear as the pain washes over your body.

"Fuck." You whimper once another round of contractions end, Natasha's hand coming up to gently push back the sweaty hairs sticking to your forehead. "You're doing amazing baby, I'm so proud of you." She hums and you sigh, closing your eyes as you feel your wife rub your back. It's quiet as you feel Natasha's hands move down to your bump, rubbing your stomach softly as she sighs.

"Come on malen'kiy golub, your mommies are so excited to meet you." Nat coos and you smile into her neck, warmth flooding your chest as you listen to her. "And I know all of your aunties and uncles are excited to meet you too. We're so excited to hug you, and kiss you, and watch you grow." She hums as she rubs small circles on your belly.

"So please come out before your mommy kills me." Both of you laugh and you snuggle more into Natasha's embrace. "You're going to be an amazing mom." You whisper and Nat grins, looking at you with a quirked eyebrow. "Yeah?" She asks and you nod your head. "Yeah..I couldn't have asked for a more amazing wife, best friend, and now..a mother to our daughter." You hum and Nat blushes, kissing you gently.

----

Your eyebrows furrow as you grip onto Natasha’s hand, pain coursing through your body as you deliver the baby. “You’re doing amazing y/n, almost there.” Nat says as you practically crush her hand, hiding the pain in her face as she watches you. "Congratulations, it's a healthy baby girl." The doctor announces as the baby's cries fill the room, your chest heaving as you lay back. Nat cuts the umbilical cord ("I've seen worst in Budapest") and they place the baby on your chest, draping a blanket over the two of you to keep you warm.

"Hi baby." You coo as you hold your child close to your chest, Natasha standing next to you with unshed tears in her eyes. You look up at her and sniffle (you're crying so hard at this point) as you see the look of awe on her face, smiling as you gently reach out to grab her hand. Softly placing her hand atop of the baby's blanketed back, she slowly moves her thumb, the child's cries quieting at both of her mother's touch. Nat is speechless as she watches the tiny newborn cling onto your chest, loving the warmth radiating off of your body.

"She's a boob man, just like her mama." Nat whispers and you laugh, that being the first thing that comes to her mind. Your child's hand slowly comes up and wraps her fingers around Natasha's thumb, that being the breaking point for the tears as they finally fall down her cheek.

----

"Are you gonna hold her or are you just going to stare at me?" You ask as Natasha watches you and Mila sit on the bed, the two of you now alone with your child. Natasha looks hesitant as she walks over to you, never feeling so nervous as you look up at her.

"You aren't going to break her Nat." You say and Nat's eyebrows furrow, seeing the tiny infant look up at her with Y/c/e. The baby took from both you and Natasha, having scarlet red hair from her and beautiful y/c/e from you. "I just don't know..I mean what if I drop her? What if I do something wrong?" Nat worries her bottom lip between her teeth and you only beckon her to come closer, scooting over so she can sit on the hospital bed.

"You won't Nat, I promise." You reassure her and she slowly sits down on the bed, following your instructions as she places her hands out. Gently transferring the baby into her arms, you smile as Mila looks up at her mama, letting out a soft "gah". "See? She loves you already." You hum as you rub Mila's hair gently, seeing the love on Natasha's face. "Hi Mila." Nat breathes out as you rest your head on her shoulder, watching your wife interact with the baby. The tears return to Natasha's eyes as the newborn looks up at her, her emotions going everywhere as she processes that this is her child, her little bundle of joy that she gets the privilege of sharing with you. "Thank you." Nat whispers out as she looks at you, a smile on her face as she sniffles.

"For what?" You question and she only kisses you softly, smile still on her face as she pulls away. "For giving me another reason to live for." She whispers and her statement covers a wide range, thank you for being her wife, thank you for giving her a chance, thank you for her daughter, thank you for giving her the family she's always wanted, just thank you.

----

Mila's cries ring out through your room and pierce your eardrums, rousing you and Nat from your slumber.

"Mm, I've got it." You sleepily mumble out of instinct as you start to get up, now used to getting woken up in the dead of night.

Mila still doesn't have a sleep schedule since she's a newborn so sometime's she'll sleep for a few hours and other times only for ten minutes.

This time around though, you get gently pushed back onto the bed by Natasha, feeling a comforting kiss placed on your temple as your wife gets up. "I've got it, moya lyubov'." She whispers and you don't have enough energy to resist, watching as Nat walks over to the bassinet. "Hi malen'kiy golub, you have a healthy set of lungs don't you?" Nat mumbles sleepily as she pulls the newborn from the crib, cradling the baby to her chest and gently rocking her back and forth. "Yeah I know, it's okay baby. It's okay, mama's got you." She hums as the baby's cries slowly die down, you still sitting on the bed as you watch your wife in awe. "Your mommies need their sleep huh little one, that sounds nice doesn't it." Nat yawns and you cant help but smile.

"But don't worry, every time you wake up we'll be here okay? We'll love you and hug you each time you cry. And I'm gonna protect you, malen'kiy golub. I won't let anything happen to you or your mommy, I promise." Natasha coos as she continues to rock Mila, not noticing how you're wide awake now. It's a soft, quiet vow, spoken in the dead of night, that Natasha will protect her family with everything she has in her..and it makes you fall more in love with her, if that's even possible.

Getting up, you make your way over to your wife, gently placing your hands on her shoulders to notify her of your presence. She knew you were coming as soon as she heard the bedsheets rustle, even in her tired state she was looking out for the two of you. "Hi." Nat greets you softly and you only hum, a tired smile on your face as you rest your head on her shoulder. Your hand comes up and is gently placed on Mila's back, rubbing soft circles on her onesie. Natasha's heart swells as she looks at her small family, smiling when you kiss her cheek. "I love you." You whisper before looking down at your daughter. "And I love you too." You hum, gently kissing her fiery red hair. Nat kisses your temple gently and closes her eyes, finally at peace with her daughter in her arms and you at her side.

[earnestly-endlessly]

kind of an odd request — do you have fics where erik is grumpy with everyone else but a ray of sunshine with charles?

Hi anon, thank you for the ask. First and foremost, I'm so sorry for how long this took me but I've been searching for all the fics that come to mind that fit your request. Second, this is not an odd request because I love this trope so much. I mean, it's basically canon that he's grumpy with everyone except for his Charles, right? Anyway, I might add to this list later on, but I can't sit on this any longer and hope that you have found some fics that you enjoy!!

Fic Recs Where Erik is grumpy with everyone but a ray of sunshine with Charles

Twice as Blind – Darksknight

Summary: Erik is probably the biggest asshole on the face of the earth, and because of this, he'll probably die alone. Charles is a complete flirt and playboy and, probably, will never commit to anyone ever.

(The lesson here is that when you have two friends who are BOTH secretly seeing someone, well, it's probable that they're seeing each other.)

In the moonlight, on a joy ride – scarlettblush

Summary: Librarian AU. Charles is the young librarian and Erik is the college student who is completely besotted with him.

The Proper Care of Actors – Clear_Liqueur, Clocks, Etherei, afrocurl

Summary: Erik is an A-list action star who is notoriously difficult to work with, until the day he gets cast alongside Charles Xavier, rom-com darling who can charm the pants off movie audiences the world over and apparently even one Erik Lehnsherr. The paparazzi catch them out and about soon enough, and their real-life Hollywood movie romance becomes instant tabloid fodder.

Rumor Mill – ikeracity

Summary: Erik is the grumpiest, most foul tempered worker at Stark industries. His grumpiness is the stuff of legends.

So it's obviously the talk of the office when Erik is being made to go to the company party and he's bringing his husband. There's rumors flying round about how much of a masochist or equally antisocial bastard Erik's husband must be to put up with him. Others think he must be a meek mouse perhaps bullied by Erik.

What they weren't expecting was the confident, charming, adorable and unbelievably nice Charles that turns up on Erik's arm. What they certainly weren't expecting was how much Erik obviously adores his husband and how happy he is to let others see this.

Work/Life Balance – pocky_slash

Summary: Alex is pretty sure his weird, anti-social boss is a robot. Right up until the guy's adorable husband shows up. His adorable husband who happens to be a famous actor. His adorable husband who happens to be the very same famous actor who was the source of many of Alex's teenage fantasies.

Terrifying Domesticity – ishipitsobad

Summary: Erik is the most dangerous and notorious mafia boss around for miles, and yet the strangest things terrify him.

For example: his children, and his very pregnant mate.

Of kittens and teacups and love – Ren

Summary: Modern AU in which Charles and Erik are flatmates. Charles studies psychology and likes tea and chess and keeps bringing home stray kittens, and Erik lets him because he's maybe perhaps a little bit sort of in love with him.

Fools Rush In – LoveSupreme

Summary: Erik owns a cafe on the edge of campus and accidentally starts maybe-stalking a Biology Professor there.

Growing Pains – ikeracity

Summary: Twelve-year-old Erik Lehnsherr is an angry, closed-off foster kid with trust issues and a bad temper. Ten-year-old Charles Xavier is a lonely kid in boarding school who just wants a friend.

Logan pretends he doesn't think they're both fucking adorable.

Series

Home Together (The Finding Our Way Remix) – significantowl

Summary: Erik is not the sort of person other students strike up conversations with. His expression, his posture, every part of his manner say: Don’t talk to me. I don’t want to talk to you. But none of that stops the boy ahead of him in line with the collapsible white cane, and nothing can stop Erik from falling for him, like it or not.

Melted Ice Cream and Macaroni Art – pocky_slash

Summary: Everybody likes Charles. Nobody likes Erik. And that's really the source of Erik's doubts. Also, there's ice cream and a baby. Part of ‘the Daycare’ verse.

Walling in or Walling Out – stlkrchck

Summary: Erik stifles a sigh. Of course this is Mr. C. F. Xavier. Of course.

For the prompt: Charles and Raven are throwing a holiday party. Erik is the grumpy neighbor who is annoyed by how loud they are being. So he goes to complain, and Charles makes it up to him.

(Wise Men Say) Only Fools Rush In – wildelybroken

Summary: After reading a fic where Erik and Charles are super sluts, meet at what is presumably Raven and Emma's engagement party, and end up sleeping together, I made the following comment and just inspired myself.

"They start casually texting each other throughout the day, maybe while they’re bored or frustrated at work, and start out meeting up and sleeping together semi-frequently. And eventually they accidentally start dating without noticing it at first, not until Raven and Emma get them alone and are like “wtf you two super sluts are actually dating??” And at first they deny, but then they’re both like “holy shit, we are!” And they meet back at one of their places and they don’t have to say anything, they just look at each other and come together immediately, kissing passionately and ~making love~. In the middle of it they realise that’s what they’ve been doing for a long time now and they confess their love to each other and they live happily ever after because they deserve all the good in the world."

For Charles – Shigai

Summary: Tired of being told he has to find his 'heart', classical piano graduate Erik Lehnsherr decides to travel to Italy and drink from the famous Italian passion for music. While searching for it, he meets Charles Xavier, a graduate in Fine Arts who is basically travelling around the world perfectioning his technique, and who will turn his world upside down.

Together they will discover that, sometimes, what you thought you didn't need is what you needed the most.

Erik Hates People – Anonymous

Summary: Erik hates people- it's his rule, a way of living.

Sugar – humanitys_cutest

Summary: Erik glances at the clock for what feels like the tenth time in less than half the minutes. It feels like he's been in some meeting or other since the day started almost 10 hours ago, and he's had just about enough of listening to these pompous old men discuss what would be the best design for his building like they know anything about it. He tries as subtly as possible to massage his temples to assuage the building migraine, but he knows it's no use.

He just wants to go home.

Everyone Likes Charles – Rosawyn

Summary: '“Everyone who's met him likes him.” Cain's grin was even stupider than before. “Once you meet him, you'll see.”

It was almost like a challenge then. And damn. Erik hated saying no to a challenge.'

Still Going Strong – JackyJango

Summary: Speaking of forty-eight, Erik hates it. Hates it even more that others are aware of it. While he’s pragmatic enough to know and accept that aging is inexorable, the increase in number gives the people around him the freedom to pounce at him with questions, opinions and advice he'd fought to keep at bay all year.

Besides, Erik believes that youth is a state of mind, not a phase in one’s life.

You have a child’s mind in a man’s body, Charles constantly tells him.

But despite his age, Erik is healthy. He works out daily. His muscles are steel and he can dead-lift four hundred pounds. He can break bones without breaking a sweat. Most importantly, he can still carry Charles to the bedroom and fuck him senseless. And as long as Erik can do that, he’s perfectly happy.

All I know is pouring rain and everything has changed – hllfire

Summary: Charles meets Erik, the man he had heard about many times from his sister and some friends, on a rainy Sunday morning. The stories about Erik paint him as a distant and intimidating man, but Charles finds out that maybe the stories had been wrong.

How to Successfully Ruin Your Life – humanveil

Summary: Seventeen-year-old Charles Xavier accepts a job at his local café, expecting nothing more than a fun, new pastime. What he gets is a mysterious customer and a schoolboy crush.

Stolen – ishipitsobad

Summary: Erik is a miserable, grumpy, cantankerous bastard, and he has every fucking right to be. He drew the short end of the stick when he got the Underworld as his domain, and there isn't very much fun to be had in judging and governing dead souls who would rather be anywhere else but with Erik in the depths of Hell.

So when he meets Charles, brilliant and lovely Charles who is more popularly known amongst the mortals as Persephone, and feels the promise of something wonderful that could make his eternally doomed existence infinitely more bearable... you can bet all your drachmas Erik's not going to let Charles go any fucking time soon.

Erik Lehnsherr's Guide to Saving the Universe By Meeting Your Soul-Mate and Falling in Love in Less than 72 Hours – magneto, pangea

Summary:Army Pilot Erik Lehnsherr is just trying to enjoy his day off when a mostly naked person crashes through the roof of his car. Even more alarming, the strange falling naked person—who goes by Charles Xavier when he's not speaking an ancient dead language—brings tidings of the apparent potential end of the world, and begs Erik to help him put a stop to it.

Well. His mother has been nagging at him to go out and meet new people.

The Theory of Partnership Dynamics – Pangea

Summary: “Detective Lehnsherr, how wonderful to see you out on the job!” The fed in the front greets him as they draw nearer. He’s shorter than the other two by a full head, and he’s beaming at Lehnsherr as if completely undeterred by Lehnsherr’s paint-peeling scowl.

“What do the feds want?” Lehnsherr asks bluntly.

“You know I can’t tell you that,” the fed answers cheerfully. Then his gaze lands on Alex, and, impossibly, his grin gets even brighter. “Did you get a new partner?"

“No,” Lehnsherr says through his teeth while at the same time Alex says, “Yes.”

[theotheroccassionalfanficwriter]

Heyhey! I think the cryo archon chlde one. Sorry for not being specific. Thank you

It's okay anon! No problem! This one has no smut and more murder couple and politics. I had fun writing this, thinking about how could you get kidnapped under lock and key and realized that it could only happen if it was allowed to so ta-da!

CW: descriptions of cruelty and gore.

The curse words, in order, are: bitch and whore

--

In a Quiet Lagoon, Devils Dwell

Summary: It was easy to forget that there was more to the Cryo Archon's face than a besotted husband and loving father. It was easier to forget that the beloved Tsaritsa was a dutiful Harbinger.

For all of Tartaglia’s meticulousness, he was not infallible as his worshippers made him to be. You knew that there were times he could be blindsided by things he didn’t take into consideration. As his wife, you took it upon yourself to ensure to cover for his blind spots, both in the battlefield and in running Snezhnaya. It required meticulous planning from both him and yourself, to ensure that the work would not interfere with your family’s life.

Tartaglia and his harbingers dealt with Snezhnaya’s foreign relations and problems. You dealt with the domestic problems; spies and dissidents that partnered with the Abyss Order, the occasional gods that wanted to dethrone Tartaglia, and on very rare occasions, traitors.

You cocked your head as you observed the room you were held in. Fine furnishings and lavish interior designs that were popular among the upper middle nobility of Snezhnaya. You were glad that your beloved son was with Tartaglia since it meant that you’d be able to get information out of this.

‘Well, at least before this reaches his ears’ You thought as you dreaded the bloodbath that would await you once this was over.

You stood up from the bed, gauging your current strength and frowning at the visible after effects of the drug.

“How troublesome”

You couldn’t locate your vision at your person, you applauded your captors for being thorough in that regard but pitied them for their worthless effort. You wobbled as you slowly walked around the room, inspecting the decors and checking out the windows. The door was locked with magic, you could tell with a cursory glance that the magic was intricate and would result into a backlash if opened with brute force.

‘Smart’ you praised them.

You moved to the windows and found the same magic. You sighed at the minor inconvenience this put you through. You could only forlornly stare at the white expanse of snow that was outside your window. The scenery was familiar to your eyes but its name eluded you.

‘And I wanted to welcome him when he returned.’

You sighed once more. Hoping that your captors would show themselves soon, you wouldn’t want to waste an opportunity to do some spring cleaning after all.

--

The moment Tartaglia returned to Zapolyarny Palace, the entire capital of Snezhnaya had drowned in his frosty wrath. He barely restrained himself from plunging the entire nation into frost, the thought of his darling son fearing him had kept him mostly sane. Pulcinella had taken his son away from the crime scene, a wise choice for the Harbinger if he wanted to keep on breathing.

Tartaglia could tell that the guards and maids stationed in your wing were all shaking. He spared no thought for them, postponing their inevitable demise for the kidnapping of his beloved wife.

“Your majesty” Dottore called from behind him.

Tartaglia kept on investigating the crime scene, scouring every detail so as to not miss any possible leads.

“The maids and guards have been questioned” Dottore reported, steeling himself to the cold hard stare of his Archon. Being subjected to it was suffocating, and he wondered how you could maintain eye contact with the Tsar when he was like this.

“I trust that you’ve brought me good news?”

The calmer Tartaglia was, the more pressure Dottore felt. His archon was fickle at best and volatile at worst. Most myths that surrounded him were almost never far from the truth and Dottore had no want nor need to be used as an example.

“Almost” He answered, “While we’ve yet to determine who is behind this attack we’ve narrowed down the list from the means used and there is ample reason to believe that the Tsaritsa has not been harmed.”

The silence was deafening. Dottore couldn’t wait to get out of Tartaglia’s warpath, seclude himself in his lab and experiment on the fools who had let this happen.

“Throw everyone stationed in this wing in the dungeons. Zapolyarny Palace will be in lock down” Tartaglia ordered as he moved out of your marital room and headed towards his former wing.

Dottore hastened to follow from behind, awaiting further orders now that the Tsar had made his move.

“Bring back everyone who entered and left the Palace. Those foolish nobles must have forgotten their place.”

For all of Tartaglia’s genial smiles and affable personality, it shouldn’t be forgotten that he was a man born to fight. One of the three archons from the original seven. A god who could stand toe to toe in the battlefield with Morax.

“As you command!” Dottore replied, face grim and yet he could not hide the excitement in his eyes. He had heard rumors, stories about the days when the entirety of the Snezhnayan ancient noble houses were almost culled in a blood bath.

There was no clear reason on why it had happened and no one dared to ask. But the one detail that remains in every iteration of the story was that the blood from those nobles were the reason for the odd patterns on the low parts of the wall of old establishments within the capital. Patterns that oddly resembled blood stains when seen from a certain angle.

--

You hummed as you saw the snow storm picking up from outside, a visible sign that Tartaglia had already learned your disappearance. You remained at your position by the window, back turned to the door as you listened to the rushing footsteps that were getting closer.

‘I do hope they can amuse me’ You thought just as the doors banged open behind you.

“How did you contact the Tsar?!”

‘Oh~ so it was them?’ You thought with mild amusement, you didn’t bother turning around to greet them.

“Is that the proper tone to use when speaking to your Tsaritsa?” You mocked them, eyes watching their angry face from the window’s reflection.

Behind you was the Count Potemkin, current head of the ancient noble House of Potemkin. Standing beside him was one of your former fiancé candidates, the heir apparent, Matvei.

“Answer me, you disgusting Сука!” Potemkin cursed making his way towards you.

You slowly turned around, a smile on your face just as he reached out to grab you. Before he could even breach your personal space his hand was pierced by ice protruding from the ground. He screamed in agony, clutching his arms as he squealed like a pig.

“Gosh, would you lower your voice? It’s unbecoming for such an ancient bloodline to act like an animal” You chastised as you took a step back and observed the damage.

“Ah, what a shame, I didn’t break your wrist at all” You commented as if you had not precisely calculated to pierce his hand through the most excruciating way.

“You Блять! Let my father go!” Matvei cursed as he struggled on his restraint “You’re no match for our family’s knights!”

You blinked at his words, tilting your head to the side, as if considering his words. He smirked on seeing your action, “That’s right! Even if you’re a harbinger you’re still just one person!”

“Would you stop squealing like a pig? It’s been minutes now, you should have gotten used to the pain!” You turned around to shut Count Potemkin’s mouth. Ice formed on his mouth, starting from the tongue and making its way outwards.

“Ah~ That’s better!” You ignored the pale looks from the father and son, “If you behave, I might just let you keep your mouth but if your son keeps on pissing me off…”

You trailed off, maintaining eye contact with the Count. Your eyes were filled with malice and sadism, “My hand will slip and blow your brains out~”

You smiled, sweet and disgustingly vile as you made your way to the couch and sat in it. The snow storm outside had turned stronger, hail fell through the skies, mixing with the rapidly falling snow. Just from that alone, you could tell that your time to wring out information from them was running out.

“What reason did you have to attempt something as stupid as this?” You asked as you formed ice shards that floated on top your fingertips.

Matvei remained silent.

“Not talking anymore?” Every move of your body was designed to mock them, a display of power that showed how easy it was for you to trample upon them, “I just remembered, the Count was raising his precious daughter outside wasn’t he? A pretty blonde child with green eyes…”

Matvei flinched and stared at you in horror, dread pooling in the pits of his stomach as you spoke,

“Inessa Yakova Potemkin” You laughed softly, “No wonder the Countess died of anger, her dear stupid husband had acknowledge his bastard child, sent her to the palace to be a handmaiden.”

“Imagine what kind of face the Tsar would make if he knew how the Potemkin family insulted me by sending an illegitimate child as a handmaiden” Your ice changed its shape into a dagger, “Even if House Potemkin is an ancient bloodline, it doesn’t erase that your house is lower than my duchal household.”

Matvei screamed in pain as your dagger cleanly sliced off his left ear. You smiled at them coldly, “Start speaking, you should know by now that any resistance would only lead to a painful death...I can’t guarantee your darling sister would be spared from it either.”

In another life, you wouldn’t threaten another’s family. You would have shown mercy but this wasn’t that life. You were the Tsar’s wife, a Harbinger, and most of all the child of Snezhnaya’s strongest ducal house. A slight against you was a slight against everything you stood for.

“Time’s running” You reminded Matvei.

“We couldn’t let you threaten the Tsar’s power! You’re Lord Pulcinella’s niece, a child of House Yusupov. We needed to remove you from the seat of power, at first we planned to get rid of your child but all of our attempts were foiled.”

Another dagger found its way to his thigh. He screamed in pain, wet stain growing on his crotch and you clicked your tongue in disdain.

“Please that’s all we know!”

This time blood spurted out from his father’s left shoulder, some of it landing on you, some on the table in front of you. You didn’t flinch, merely wiping the blood that landed on your face with your gloved hand.

“Father!”

“Let’s do this again, shall we?” You smiled.

“I-I really don’t-”

Spikes of ice burst out from his right thigh.

“Duke Izmaylov! It was him who planned all of this! Duchess Tolstoy funded the operations! Please spare me!”

“How disappointing” You sighed as you made his father’s eyes burst.

You sneered in disgust as Matvei vomited on the marble tiles in front of him. You looked up as you heard heavy footsteps and the sounds of scream echoing beyond the open doors. Moments later, Tartaglia was visibly walking towards you from the other end of the hallway.

“Ah. Time’s up.”

You stood up from the couch and made your way towards your husband, the Tsar, Tartaglia. His cold eyes melted and looked upon you with relief, his hands patted your body, looking for non-existent injuries. You let him do as he pleased, both of you ignoring the dying count and the vomiting Matvei.

“I came as fast as I could” Tartaglia burrowed his face on your neck, ignoring the discomfort from the height difference between the two of you “I thought I’ve lost you.”

You felt your heart ache at his tone, your arms automatically hugging him in comfort, laying a soft kiss to his cheek as you spoke, “I’ll make sure that will never happen.”

You signaled the Fatui waiting behind him to start rounding up the two.

“We’ll have to clean up Two ducal households and five Countdoms” You reported as you gently and comfortably let Ajax’ hand settle on your waist as he led you out of the mansion.

“I’ll handle that. You should take a rest with Teucer, our son was worried today.” Ajax replied as softly as he could but the tenseness had yet to fade away.

You leaned further into his embrace, “Mhm. By the way, the insider was Inessa, you should get rid of all the staff that had a relationship with her. It wouldn’t do if one of her lovers got the idea to avenge her.”

“As you wish.”

--

Three months later the public bore witness to a new cruelty of the Cryo Archon. At Krasnaya Square, a stage was set up, in it were the shackled and chained members of several noble households. Some from the ancient noble houses, and the others from the new nobles.

Tartaglia had intentionally spread the news of your capture and subsequent rescue. He wanted to make a show of power, one you approved of, if only to ensure that his plans for world domination and eventual downfall of Celestia would run smoothly.

Teucer, your 5 yr old son, sat on your lap watching the proceedings from the balcony area. The two of you were surrounded by Fatui guards, new ones. The entire area was secured and security was tight, there was no way a rescue for the condemned would occur.

Tartaglia had made sure of that.

“Close your eyes, dearest” You whispered to your son’s ears.

From below, all of the traitors had blood bursting out of their heads, spikes protruding from the inside of their brains as Pulcinella finished declaring their crimes and their sentence. You hummed a soft tune as Teucer asked, “Mamochka, can I open my eyes now?”

“Not yet dearest, not until Papa comes back.”

You gazed down at the crowd, watching as they rejoiced at the culling before your eyes were drawn at the corner. You smiled at the familiar blonde hair of Inessa, your eyes merciless as she stared at you with hatred.

'Ah, how she must have looked like once she realize all of it was a sham~'

You waved at the crowd from the balcony, pleased that the nobles would now learn to step back in line. You felt your husband’s stare and gave him a loving look.

“Mamochka?”

You sighed in fond exasperation, you figured that he could look now that the bodies were being carted away, “You can open them now, give Papa and the rest a good wave okay?”

Teucer did as you said, more cheers erupting from the crowd upon seeing their beloved Tsarevich waving at them. From his position below, Ajax smiled warmly at the sight of his family being safe and sound. The sun shined brightly in Snezhnaya’s eternal winter.

An auspicious sign from their Cryo Archon.

[inknopewetrust]

smallest joys (Henry!Sherlock Holmes x Fem!Reader)

Summary: the tree in the Holmes’ backyard as a place of great peace and laughter of all, and a moment arises for it to be a place of forgiveness and love as well.

Pairing: Sherlock Holmes x Female Reader

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: none.

A/N: thanks so much for reading and always remember that authors love to hear any feedback on stories, so don’t be shy to share your opinions. Requests are still closed, but I’m working on getting them up and running hopefully soon! xoxo (gif not mine)

Enola was perched high above the ground in the great gray tree that sat far from the house she had grown to resent without her mother there. It was difficult, the constant want of adventure and thrill that was often smothered because of Mycroft’s inability to have a semblance of joy in his life.

Throwing the shading pencil in her sketchbook and closing it with a huff, Enola heard a set of angered footsteps make their way towards the tree in which she inhabited and she balled her fists against a branch. Half expecting it to be Mycroft yelling at her for leaving the study and half expecting it to be Sherlock doing their eldest brother’s bidding in a kinder manner, one they always hoped she’d fall for.

But it wasn’t. Y/n L/n, Sherlock’s feisty assistant from London was irate with her cheeks as red as apples storming toward the tree. Without noticing Enola above, Y/n leaned against its trunk and her head fell into her hands in embarrassment.

“Did you do something stupid?” Enola inquired and you jumped ever so slightly, looking up with great haste at Enola above. The young girl was smiling down on you kindly but also with such an inquisitive mind, you weren’t sure if she truly cared or just wanted manor gossip to share with the housemaid.

“And why would you ask such a thing, young lady?” You shoved your hands on your hips and narrowed fine eyes at Enola, trying to forget why you stormed out in the first place, though that was practically impossible because you knew he would follow after an argument.

“I asked you first, Y/n. And I’m not a young lady, you sound like Mycroft.” Enola swung her feet off a branch and rested her head in her intertwined hands that laid on top of another arm of the great tree.

“What happened? Did Sherlock finally recognize your talents for discovery or did you say something stupid that angered him?” Enola asked again, more in depth than before and her eyes narrowed now at the woman she had grown to admire very much.

Y/n was always someone who Enola could depend upon. Whether it be for new books from London or a simple lesson on dust particles, she knew Y/n had many of the answers. But as of late, with her mother gone and the tension in the home only growing, Sherlock appeared to be easily angered or upset by small comments, jokes or jabs at him that were not unusual from his assistant and Enola took notice. She saw the way Y/n’s eyes fell or how she would storm out of the room, angered at either herself or his reaction to her little joys and she couldn’t quite figure out why it was always her he was getting angry at. It had never happened before they had come to stay at his childhood home to help with Enola.

“Enola, I do not want to burden you with the petty arguments of adults. It is no concern of yours.”

“If it is my brother’s fault I consider it my concern.”

You pursed her lips at the girl before indulging in your frustrations.

“Every little comment I make he gets angry at. I am not use to being yelled at by him and I certainly do not understand why he is so uptight ever since we arrived. I try to help with his inquiries about your mother but even then, my input seems to go in one ear and sails out the other! Enola, I mean nothing by this, truly, I am simply frustrated by always being second fiddle to a man who appears to need no help at all.” You managed to mutter out in a moments time and Enola understood. Mycroft was the one treating Enola the same way at the moment and she wanted nothing more than to place a metal helmet on his head and bang a stick against it to set his mind straight. The men just do not appear to respect the intelligence of the women in the house.

“I am not meant for a life of domesticity, Enola. I am sure you can tell by the way I stir a pot or fold the laundry, I like adventure and I enjoy mystery very much. I simply want Sherlock to see that too. I don’t want to lose my dearest friend over one little spat.”

Enola smiled down at you and jumped down, meeting the grass with a thud and wiped off the shards that managed to catch themselves on her stockings.

“And that is why I admire you, very much, if I may add. And are you sure you don’t love him? If friends act the way you two do, I would have to choose my friends wisely.” You chuckled, reassured her you were simply just friends and embraced Enola in a some-what motherly manner, though Enola saw it as what she’d imagined would be a best friend, or sister.

“I would tell him how you feel. Make him understand you better and believe me when I say he will listen.” Enola retracted from the embrace and shot off towards the house, leaving you in state of bewilderment and confusion but when you turned around yourself intending to watch Enola run toward the house, you were met with the man you had no more than ten minutes ago stormed away from.

Sherlock stood with one hand in a pocket and the other clutching a book to his chest and a small pout on his face. The pout wasn’t one of sadness or disappointment, but of wonder and curiosity, already trying to decipher the situation before him.

“She was quick to run away.” Sherlock observed and moved toward the tree, leaning his back against it and looking over to you, just slightly to the side of him but facing him, not the land surrounding the tree.

“Well if she knew your temper as well as I do, I would run away too but obviously that has proven to not be an option.”

“I came here to apologize.” Your eyes, ears, and heart managed to perk up at the sound of Sherlock saying the word “apologize” because it wasn’t one he had ever said before, certainly not to you or anyone else he interacted with.

“An apology? From the great Sherlock Holmes? What ever shall I do with this honor?” You faked a gasp and held a hand to your forehead in a manner that only suggested a maiden swooning. Sherlock enrolled his eyes at the joke, seeming to understand that it was simply that, and as your hand made its way down from your forehead, he captured it softly in his empty one and held it gently, yet firm and your eyes flicked up to meet his.

“I would like to be serious about this, Y/n. My actions towards you the last few days have been unlike me and I am sorry for making you feel as if your opinion doesn’t matter, because it most certainly does.”

So he had heard you short conversation with Enola.

“Your opinion I value more than anyone in this world and I am frustrated I have gotten nowhere with my mother’s case in several days. I want her to return safely and with every passing day that outcome becomes less likely.”

“If you spoke to me about your concerns earlier we may have found a middle ground Sherlock. I accept your apology but I will not forgo my jokes in any situation so enjoy the humor while I still walk this earth.”

Sherlock couldn’t help but let the smallest smirk grace his face at the comment. He knew you always took your work seriously, but humor helped with the difficulties some cases can bring and he often failed to recognize the importance of laughter and enjoyment even in the darkest times. He still held your hand in his, in which he then brought it up to his lips and kissed the inside of your palm. It was personal, intimate, and apologetic.

“I am sorry you have to put up with me. I shouldn’t be so harsh when you’re trying to brighten the darkest days.”

“If I want to leave I can, but I seek thrill too much to let you or these cases disappear from my life.”

Sherlock actually smiled and sat down against the trunk, leading you to sit beside him and wrapped his free hand around your shoulders pulling you close. Ever since you arrived at his home, intimate interactions were seldom as Mycroft would have a million harsh words about how you were not a “proper lady to Sherlock”, but it wasn’t like Sherlock would have cared anyway.

“Shall we return to this story?” Sherlock said in a low, “fancy” voice in your ear and you couldn’t help but let out a snort at his attempt to be regal.

“I sincerely hope Elizabeth slaps Mr. Darcy across the face after what he said about her family. If that does not happen, the story dies there.”

“Would you slap every man who offends you? Because if so I’ll brace for one now.” Sherlock was actually joking for once but you slapped his chest lightly with your hand and let it fall, playing with a button on his waist coat. He looked down at you, a curl from the top of his head falling onto his forehead with a spring and you smiled at the handsome man you curled up against. 

“Perhaps.”

Sherlock laid a lingering kiss on your forehead and opened the book, removing the leaf that served at the bookmark and began reading in total comfort with you beside him. It was perfect until a rumble came from the bush and Enola shot up with sticks in her hair.

“So you ARE together!?”

[dotthings]

Let’s talk about why Dean dancing with a lamp is subtext, but it’s subtext that supports textual arcs. Dean dancing with a lamp is not random. Meta on why Dean dancing with a lamp is part of the build of a textual arc for Dean, thematically, which also connects to his relationship with Cas. This symbolic moment being tacitly about Destiel will only feel like reaching if you ignore context, ignore canon, ignore long arcing, ignore textual material surrounding it. This isn’t just me talking about a ship, this is an important arc for Dean himself emotionally and the way canon’s working, Cas has become the star player in this specific emotional Dean arc about yearning. 

Here are some canon quotes. I could just leave these here and not write another word of meta because the canon wrote it for me. But I’ve added some further commentary to spell out clearly what I’m getting at.

Dean in 8.14 “Trial and Error” by Andrew Dabb:

“You see a light at the end of this ugly-ass tunnel. I don't. But I tell you what I do know – it's that I'm gonna die with a gun in my hand. 'Cause that's what I have waiting for me – that's all I have waiting for me. I want you to get out. I want you to have a life – become a man of Letters, whatever. You, with a wife and kids and – and – and grandkids, living till you're fat and bald and chugging Viagra – that is my perfect ending, and it's the only one that I'm gonna get.”

Dean in 10.16 “Paint it Black” by Eugenie Ross-Lemming and Brad Buckner:

“You know, the life I live, the work I do…I pretty much just figured that that was all there was to me, you know? Tear around and jam the key in the ignition and haul ass until I ran out of gas. I guess I just thought sooner or later, I’d go out the same way that I live – pedal to the metal, and that would be it....Now, um… recent events, uh… make me think I might be closer to that than I really thought. And…I don’t know. I mean, you know, there’s – there’s things, there’s…people, feelings that I-I-I want to experience differently than I have before, or maybe even for the first time.”

Sam and Dean in 11.04 “Baby” by Robbie Thompson:

SAM: Really? You don't . . . Ever want something more? DEAN: I'm sorry, have you met us? We're batting a whopping zero in domestic life, man. Goose eggs. SAM: You don't ever think about something? Not marriage or whatever. But . . . Something? You know, with a hunter? Somebody who understands the life?

Sam and Dean in 13.23 “Let the Good Times Roll” by Andrew Dabb:

DEAN: But on a beach somewhere, you know? Can you imagine? You, me, Cas, toes in the sand, couple of them little umbrella drinks. Matching Hawaiian shirts, obviously. Some hula girls. SAM: You talking about retiring? You? DEAN: If I knew the world was safe? Hell, yeah. And you know why? 'Cause we freaking earned it, man.

Sam and Dean in 15.08 “Our Father, Who Aren’t in Heaven” by Eugenie Ross-Lemming and Brad Buckner:

DEAN: Look, man, I didn't want to say anything, okay, 'cause I was kind of in in a bad place, and, uh, yeah, I didn't want to jinx it or whatever, but, you know, I tried the family thing, right? SAM: Yeah, me too. And that's not for us. DEAN: No, not really. But I'm just saying if it was to work, Eileen, you know, she gets it. She gets us. She gets the life. She's hot. SAM: Dean. I mean, I'm not even- DEAN: Look, all I'm saying is you- you could do worse, okay? And she could certainly do better. Like, so much better. I'm happy for you, Sammy.

Dean and Garth in 15.10 “The  Heroes’ Journey” written by Andrew Dabb:

DEAN: You know, I gotta say, aside from pincushion in there… this is pretty nice. GARTH: Yeah, better than I ever thought I'd get. I mean, hunting -- I figured I'd be dead before I'm 40. You know, go out young and pretty. But now I've got a great wife, great kids. I guess...sometimes things work out.

Dean in 15.10 “The Heroes’ Journey” by Andrew Dabb:

Dean, wistful, watching through the window as Garth and Bess dance: You know, I always thought I could be a good dancer if I wanted to be.

Ok, let those roll around in your brain for moment. 

Now: CONTEXT. CONTEXT. CONTEXT.

There’s this long running arc about maybe Sam and Dean could each find a significant other, not white picket fence, but...something, with someone already in the life, who gets their life. There’s Dean’s move from despairing and believing the only ending he could have, the only ending any hunter could have, is dying with a gun in hand, to Dean’s enthusiasm for the concept of retirement, Dean’s wistfulness about finding a significant other, for what he thinks he can’t have, and he starts the cycle all over again, if he can’t have it, then he wants Sam to have it, so Dean encourages Sam with Eileen. Saileen, the Dean-blessed, Dean-approved Sam ship. Dean ships it. And that is how the canon is trending, complete with Sam and Eileen kissing goodbye and saying “this is real” and even God himself saying their feelings were real, “that was all you,” even if God manipulated events around them. Which is an overt mirror to Dean and Cas and Dean’s expressly stated doubts about what’s real and what isn’t, and Cas telling Dean “we are.” 

Much the way Sam has been witness to Destiel, and has often pointed out Dean’s Cas feelings. Dean’s got a front row seat to Saileen and approves; Sam’s had a front row seat to Destiel and approves. 

Let’s throw in Robert Berens’ work in The Trap here, since that’s relevant to this specific topic as well, because why did Sam and Dean in the potential future timeline where they’d killed Chuck give up and cave in to their vampire instincts? The world being overwhelmed with monsters...and losing Eileen and losing Cas. It’s right there in the dialogue. I’ll give you the quote and everything:

Sam and Dean in 15.09 “The Trap” by Robert Berens:

SAM: You want to quit? What's happened to you, Dean? Ever since -- DEAN: Ever since what? We lost pretty much everyone we've ever cared about? Ever since the Mark made Cas go crazy? Ever since I had to bury him in a Ma'lak box? Ever since then? Yeah. You know why? 'Cause the monsters -- they're everywhere. Everywhere! What we do -- it's not even Hunting anymore. It's whack-a-mole. We don't even save people. Every friend we've ever had is either dead, or they got wise and they packed it in. SAM: Jody's still fighting, and Bobby -- DEAN: Bobby has a death wish, and you know it. And Jody -- ever since what happened to Donna and the girls, she does, too. And after Eileen... so do you.

“Ever since” Dean had to bury Cas in a Ma’lak box. “After Eileen...so do you.” 

So there’s this canonical long, long thread across multiple authors (and those weren’t even all the quotes, I’m sure people could dig up more) about Dean in particular yearning towards finding a significant other, some contentment, with someone who already is in the hunting life, who gets it, who understands.  

An episode that flat out shows how losing their significant others is the final straw that rips out Sam and Dean’s last will to fight, and they lose themselves, and after they’re turned into vampires, they just...give into the darkness. Where Sam gives up their shot at destroying the big bad because losing everyone they love is too high a cost. Where losing Cas makes Dean lose hope, where losing Eileen sends Sam into a death wish mindset. Sam and Dean don’t just need each other. That’s not canon, it never has been.

And then right after that, along comes meta episode The Heroes’ Journey. Sorry if you don’t like The Heroes’ Journey, but it’s what the canon did, it’s textual, along with everything else I’ve pointed out here, and in among the crackish humor are some real emotional narrative points. 

In The Heroes’ Journey, Dean gets to see Garth’s life. Garth found his significant other, Bess, and she’s another werewolf. Now, Garth’s life resembles the traditional white picket fence idea a lot more than what Team Free Will are headed for. Garth has a big house with a porch, and he’s a dentist. He’s also a werewolf and his wife is a werewolf and his kids are werewolves because Bess is a pureblood werewolf, Garth didn’t exactly leave the life, and he helps Sam and Dean on a case. But nothing’s been indicating to me that anyone in Team Free Will is headed for that kind of settling down, with a house, becoming a dentist. However, the canon has been practically shouting now, as we near final episodes of SPN, to make the point about a desirable outcome--some kind of stability, contentment, and a significant other. Dean gets a front row seat to seeing a hunter can have that. Garth’s a hunter who turned into a werewolf and he can have that. 

When EP’s talk about how they aren’t headed for a white picket fence or driving off into the sunset or settling down, none of that rules out them finding...something...with someone, and some form of stability and contentment.  Nope, I can’t really imagine them in the suburbs becoming dentists. But canon sure is putting up big neon arrows to...something. Think outside the box. This isn’t about the white picket fence. 

And in The Heroes’ Journey, Dean, conked out on the good gas so Garth can fix his teeth, has a trippy dream where he dances with a lamp.

Rewatch the ep. Look at how the dance is choreographed not just the use of light, because that’s a clue too. The whole dance could have been Dean and Garth being dancing bros, but Garth fades off the stage, and Dean dances alone...until he grabs the standing lamp. In a season where Dean and Cas’s relationship is an A-plot, define it how you like, it’s A-plot. Their breakup and their reconciliation, which played like a marital breakup and reconciliation, are tied to major mytharc beats. In a season where a long-running textual theme about Dean’s developing hope for retirement and his wistfulness about “things...people...feelings...” is getting further play. Where Dean and Cas’s relationship continues to be one of the show’s most central ones.

Dean dances with a lamp. While his emotionally fraught, intense close relationship with Cas--A BEING MADE OF LIGHT--has a long-running arc and recently more and more textual level content spelling out the sublimated romantic interest in small words, while there’s an arc about Dean’s yearning for that stability, contentment, a significant other.

CONTEXT. 

We don’t think Destiel’s “going canon” because Dean dances with a lamp, it’s that Dean dancing with a lamp is kinda loud serving as reflection of canon textual arcing. Sometimes subtext adds a layer. Sometimes subtext is directly tied to the surface layers, an echo, a highlighter.

I’ll just be over here, crying because Dean danced with a lamp.

[word-scribbless]

Different

I know I have requests to write but this one has been sitting in my drafts and I wanted to finally post it!

Masterlist

Summary: When Hollis man tries to throw a wrench in things Gibbs reminisces about what makes Y/N so different.

TW: mentions of miscarriage, family death and domestic violence

Italics are flashbacks

————��———-

Hollis Mann had come to help NCIS on a case of a missing Army luitenent and a missing marine gunnery Sargent. Y/N was also at NCIS from the FBI, helping profile suspects. This made for an interesting situation for Gibbs. Hollis his ex and Y/N his current girlfriend. It wasn’t uncommon for Y/N to work cases with Gibbs’ team, but she had yet to work one that envolved an ex. A streak he wasn’t too thrilled to have end.

Things were pretty civil, y/n knew he dated someone from Army CID, but didn’t remember her name right away. when Y/N arrived the team was in the squad room, working at their desks, she came and sat in Gibbs chair, asking what they had. When noone warned her of the impending doom of that decision , Hollis knew this woman and Gibbs were dating. She couldn’t help but be jealous. This jealousy only multiplied when she saw y/n kiss Gibbs cheek later that day when she thought no one was looking.

With the way Mann was acting, and a few comments from Tony, Y/N quickly put two and two together and realized that Hollis was THAT lieutenant colonel. Y/N was nothing but nice, not petty and jealous the way Hollis felt. Gibbs wasn’t nervous for their relationship, things were good with him and Y/N. He just wasn’t sure how Hollis would act. He knew y/N could handle herself though, so there wasn’t much to worry about.

Overall, things went pretty smoothly, that is until Hollis ‘let something slip’ about Shannon and Kelly, and clearly made a big deal out of ‘apologizing’ and assuming y/n didn’t know.

Gibbs was pissed because he could tell her intentions were to hurt Y/N. She was hurt when she found out during a cause, so she must have thought she could do the same to his current girlfriend. Gibbs wanted to tell her off, not because she messed up his relationship, or hurt Y/N, but because it was her intention to.

Y/N caught up with Jethto when he stormed out of the room after DiNozzo quickly changed the subject back to the case.

“Relax baby.” She said as she caught him by the steps, using the nickname she knew he secretly loved.

“She did that to hurt you.” He seethed, and Y/N slyly took his hand on the side where the team couldn’t see.

“But I’m not hurt.” She assured him. “You’re a catch J, I’m sure it’s not easy to get over you.”

“You think so?” He smirked at her, and she felt the tension leave his body.

“Mhm, but I really don’t plan on finding out anytime soon.” She smiled and settled for running her thumb over his fingers since she couldn’t kiss him and he squeezed her hand in understanding.

“Good to know.” He smirked. ”now get back to profiling and I’ll check in with Abby.

“Yes sir” she smiled and looked around before kissed his cheek quickly and heading back to the bull pen.

On the way down to abby’s lab he begins to think about the beginning of their relationship and how he and Y/N came to be.

Y/N and Gibbs had Worked together a few times, they had made a habit of going to get dinner after cases wrapped.

It felt like they were on the same page feelings wise but she was never sure. One night she got up her courage to bring it up.

“Gibbs,”

“Hmm”

“Are we on a date?”

He Smirked at her and took her hand

“Was kinda hoping you’d catch on.”

“Could of just asked” she smiled back. He rolled his eyes playfully and asked

“Y/N will you go on a date with me?”

“Sure how’s right now?” She giggled.

Before he could get to the lab Hollis caught him and pulled him into a near by conference room.

“I didn’t mean to mess things up by telling Y/N about Shannon and Kelly.” He could tell she was trying really hard to mean it, but wouldn’t truly be wracked with guilt if she had messed things up.

“She already knew Holl.” He admitted, trying to remember what y/n said about not being angry with her.

“You told her?” She questions surprised.

He sighed and nodded. This was not a conversation he wanted to have today.

“What’s so different about her?” She asked,

“Hollis.” He responded.

He could never answer that question simply. Truthfully, everything was different about her. She was just Y/N, his Y/N.

“I’m sorry, I guess I just never thought someone would crack you.” She smiled.

“Yeah well.” He smiled back, thinking of Y/N.

She would say she didn’t crack him, she just speaks Gibbs, or something silly like that. She never wanted him to feel like she was changing him.

“You love her” she said shocked.

“Hollis” he warned again.

“Have you told her?”

“She knows” he grunted.

“Yeah but have you told her.”

“Hollis”

“Tell her Gibbs” she said and he was thinking of a comeback when there was a knock on the door. Y/N poked her head in the room.

“Hey, I’m sorry to interrupt, but the director needs you in MTAC Gibbs” He didn’t know how she knew where they were, but god was he glad she did.

In the elevator Gibbs thought about why it’s so easy to trust and love Y/N. He thought back to the first time he told her about Shannon and kelly.

A few dates in she sensed he was struggling with something. It had been the anniversary of Shannon and Kelly’s deaths.

“J, I know you hate talking about things but,” she said carefully after dinner at his house.

“If you want to be my girlfriend then you are.” He grunted back taking her hand, assuming that’s where she was going.

“Oh!” She was shocked and had no idea what to say.

“You don’t want to be?”

“No, I do! I absolutely do” she corrected. “but that isn’t what I was going to bring up.”

“Oh then go on.” He chuckled.

“No we can talk about it another time, so I’m your girlfriend?” She smiled.

“Yup”

“Cool!”

“Cool?” He teased.

“Yeah cool!”

Gibbs chuckled and put an arm around her. “so what did you want to know?.”

“Another time-“ she started but was cut off by Gibbs.

“If it’s on your mind I wanna know”

“I-“

“Y/N” He insisted

“I’m a profiler”

“I know this” he said sarcastically.

“Right so I pick up on things and I pick up on things easiest when I have experienced the same type of thing.” She said and sighed at his raised eyebrow.

“English?”

She huffed a nervous laugh and continued.

“Okay I’ll just say it. I can tell you’ve suffered a big loss, probably family, a wife or a child. I know you probably don’t want to talk about it because you’ve been forthcoming about your ex wives and not ever about a loss so it’s clearly something personal.” She stopped and squeezed his hand. “And I hate talking about my loss, I also hate talking about my ex husband so you’re better at this communication thing than me.”

Gibbs scoffed “no one has ever told me that before.”

She smiled. “I just want you to know that however you process, however you grieve, I don’t want to change that. I just want you to know that I’m happy to be a part of it, lean on me like I want to lean on you. I won’t pry, or expect you to be over it, but if you loved them then they’re important to me.” She sighed again. “It just, felt wrong kind of knowing with out telling you. I know I don’t really know, just profiled but still.”

“My wife and daughter, they were killed. My wife saw a member of a drug cartel murder a man and was going to testify. Her protective detail was shot in the head while driving them and the crash killed them.” She breathed out and Gibbs winced waiting for the inevitable‘I’m sorry’ that he never knew what to do with but it never came. She just held his hand and nodded.

“I never tell anyone. They died, I shouldn’t dwell on it. But all my marriages failed because I wanted it back and I couldn’t let them go.”

She shook her head and nuzzled closer to him

“As much as we want to ignore it and hope the pain goes away, we still love them. That doesn’t mean we can’t love someone new, but that old love doesn’t just go away. I’d like to know more about them if you ever feel like sharing them with someone, but you don’t have to.”

He nodded and squeezed her hand then looked at her expectatntly. She noticed the tears in the corner of his eyes and was sure hers looked similar.

“My turn?”

Gibbs nodded.

“Ryan, my first husband. Killed on deployment a year into our marriage. I miscarried from the stress a few months later.” Gibbs pulled her closer into him wrapping his arms around her.

“He’d like you, you’re strong and protective, and you challenge me. He always said I needed someone challenging around to keep me honest.” She chuckled. “I- I didn’t want to date for the longest time after he died.. All my friends said I needed to move on, get out there again after a few years but I wasn’t ready so I picked people that would never work, people that were the exact opposite of him, of what I deserved. Then I married one of them. He ended up in jail, I ended up in the hospital.” Gibbs soft face turned to anger.

“Relax, he was killed in a prison fight 5 years ago.”

“Good” he said and she felt his body relax a bit.

“I stopped dating after that, until I met you.”

Gibbs smiled.

“The truth is, if you want to be in my life, Ryan’s part of it. Just like Shannon and Kelly are part of yours, and mine if you let me stick around. Which I’d like to”

He nodded And she readied herself for goodbye.

“Have any pictures?”

“Of Ryan?”

He nodded and she smiled.

“Yeah in my wallet, that mean you want me to stick around?

He nodded and she went to get her bag. She pulled out a picture and began to tell him about their first date, their lives, and why she thought Ryan would be happy that she was spending time with jethro.

Gibbs smiled and told her he’d be right back.

He returned with a box and pulled out an old scrap book that’s only ever seen the light of day when he’s particularly missing his family. He never thought he’d show someone else. But he also never thought he’d meet someone like Y/N.

“What’s this? She asked as he handed it to her.

“This is my turn.”

“Jethro.” She said as she opened it and realized it was pictures of Shannon and Kelly. She closed it again”we don’t have to.”

“I want to. They’d love you.”

She smiled and patted the spot next to her.

Back in the conference room, Y/N lingered with Hollis, knowing she needed to face her head on.

“He didn’t tell you about rule 6?” Hollis asked, still a bit of chill to her voice. Looking like she wasn’t quite ready to give up the hurt feeling just yet.

“He did, but I have rules of my own.” Y/N smiled trying to ease the tension.

“Is one of them not listening to his rules?”

She chuckled.

“Exactly.” She laughed “No I agree with some of them, but not the ones that go against the rules of being a civil human. It’s charming on him somehow... but it’s not a good look for me.”

She joked and eased a bit when Hollis smiled.

“Does that mean you’ll accept my apology?”

“I would, but there is no need for it.”

“There is, the way I acted was petty and uncalled for.” Hollis sighed, causing Y/N to nod.

“Maybe, but I understand.”

“Ugh why do you have to be likable?”

Y/N laughed with Hollis and relaxed a little. “Sorry, do you want me to say something mean? Or at least like scowl a little?”

“It would make me feel a little less guilty.” She smiled, but y/n could see the honesty in her eyes.

“Don’t feel guilty. I’m not running, I’m not upset. He’s a tough nut to crack. I get it. I didn’t know that he and you had history until your reaction, if I’d known I would have been more discreet, I never meant to rub your face in anything.” Y/N assured her

“You didn’t know?”

“Well I’d heard your name, you know tony.” The both huffed laughs “but jethro is, well you know.”

“That doesn’t upset you?” Hollis wondered

“Not really, I mean I’m a profiler so I have a leg up but he’ll tell me things when he’s ready.”

“You’re much more patient than me.”

“Not always, I just, I know what it’s like to lose someone and not know how to let them go.”

“Ah that’s how you’re different.”

“I’d like to think there’s other things he sees in me, but yes that’s a big difference.” She nodded.

“Hey, Y/N/N need your help. Hollis, DiNozzo has a statement to go over with you.”

They both nodded and followed Gibbs into the hall.

Gibbs pointed Hollis to the conference room where tony was.

“Hey come here” he led y/n to the elevator and paused it.

“Jethro what’s wrong?”

He grabbed her face and kissed her.

“There is way more I see in you.” He whispered against her lips.

“You heard me?”

“I did”

“Spy” she joked with a smile as she pulled him back in.

“You were too nice to her.” He grunted.

“I couldn’t be mean. I’d be bitter if I lost a man like you.”

“Mmm cause I’m such a good kisser?”

“Mhm among other things.”

“Yeah, I’m good at that too.”

“You’re a lot more than just good in bed Jethro.” Y/N said softly. “Not that you’re not excellent at that too.”

Gibbs laughed and kissed her head then looked seriously at Y/N.

“You know I care about you right?” Gibbs asked almost shyly. Y/N froze at his tone, she’d never heard him sound so insecure.

“Of course I do.” She cupped his face.

“Y/N love is a hard word for me-“

“Jethro, you don’t need to say it, I know how you feel. You show me every single day.” Y/N moved his face to look in her eyes.

“You deserve to hear it Y/N.” He huffed.

“What I deserve is to be loved and love. I think I have that Jethro.”

“You do.” He whispered and pulled her lips to his. “You do.”

“Good, now that that’s settled. Let’s go close this case huh?” He smiled at her words.

“Y/N” he said pulling her back from the switch. “I love you.” He said with confidence but she could tell it took everything he had to say it out loud.

She smiled as turned around, wrapping him in a hug. She hid her face against him. “I know you do baby. I love you too, So much!.”

He pulled her face up and looked into her eyes. all she could see was love as he leaned in to kiss her. She forgot where they were as he wrapped his arms around her and dipped his tongue in her mouth. He slowly pulled away and kissed her head.

“Okay, you ready now?”

“To go home? Yes.” She whispered, voice shakey from the kiss.

He smirked his classic Gibbs smirk and shook his head “to solve the case.”

“Oh that, yeah okay.” She said with a smile that he couldn’t help but love.

He knew she was it for him right then and there. He’d known for a while but never truly admitted it to himself. Yes he sucked at marriage and she didn’t have a great experience either. No matter what though, he knew she was it for him. He had only truly loved Shannon and Kelly before he met her, but he knew that both of them would have loved Y/N as much as he did and been proud of him for falling in love again.

@mac99martin @kittenlittle24 @viper-official @ilovemark1951 @theofficialzivadavid @averyhotchner @andreasworlsboring101 @diesinspanishbcimhispanic

[mxvladdy]

That Diavolo angst was perfect. The best, most high quality cheese at the end. Domestic fluff galore. Decadence straight from the source of your hands.

Could we get some Diavolo fluff with an MC who ran away from home(of lamentation) that wants to spend the night at the castle because the brothers were being dismissive [in tsundere and sibling fun-poking ways] but it just kept reminding MC of their abusive home life in the most innocuous ways

i.e. Satan mocking the books they like for being "too whimsical/fanciful". Asmo making a few too many degrading comments on their skin/hair care or lack thereof (like, tell me the RIGHT way to do it then!  If I'm such a fuck up on my own). Mammon and Belphie.... being Mammon and Belphie.  Levi gate keeping them from devildom equivalent interests because they're "not a real fan if they don't [x]"

A/N: Awww you spoil me with compliments ~^.^~! I hope this is to your liking!

It was late and Diavolo was exhausted. Diavolo looks down at his over inundated schedule, black and red ink covering the pages, barely any of the original white pages could be seen now.  Squinting he chuckles at the elegant handwriting of his butler. He had quite literally penciled in two hours for sleep. A sweet gesture for the evening. It was unfortunate he had wasted half of that time going over in his last meeting of the night. 

The meeting was supposed to be just a brief update on the expansion of the kingdom out west. New trading routes with the colonies and lands not yet in his domain. But, as usual, the evening turned to his exchange program and he always had time to talk about his pet project, even if his schedule didn’t. Each of the brothers was adamant that the program was going well. Better than they had hoped in fact, they all warmed up to you much to his delight, even saying they were treating you like you were part of the family.

That should have been his first clue. He knew the brothers and how they acted with family. Perhaps it was because he was exhausted that the comment went over his head, perhaps it was his own ego telling him everything was going great. He brushed aside the remarks to conclude the meeting and get to his rooms without a second thought. Diavolo practically vibrating with excitement at the hot bath waiting for him. Maybe he could nab some chocolate from Barbatos’s secret stash too. With those sweet thoughts filling his head and his eyes buried in his agenda he overlooks you standing by his door. He skids to a stop only after almost knocking you off your feet with his massive bulk. “My apologies, I did not see you there.” He steadies you looking you over for any injuries. “Do you need something?” He forces an energetic smile onto his face to hide his exhaustion and slight irritation at yet another snag in his evening.

He watches you shuffle in place for a moment, eyes downcast. “Sorry-sorry, it’s silly, but could I stay with you for a bit? I don’t want to be at the house.” Your voice warbles, hands coming up to wipe at fresh tears. Diavolo’s hearts sink, his previous exhaustion taking a backseat to you.  

He beckons you into his room without a second thought. “What’s wrong? What happened?” You shake your head rubbing harder at your face, your skin getting more and more agitated. He purrs deep in his chest pulling you close on instinct to comfort you and for you to stop agitating your skin. You bury your face in his uniform.

“It’s stupid really, I don’t know why I’m upset.” You laugh. The weak sound getting caught on a wet hiccup. “I just can’t handle the teasing right now.” Anger begins to brew in his gut, the brothers, you were obviously talking about them. Had he been to lose with his leash? Did they lie to him?

He leads you to his favorite chair by the window and crouches next to you. “Explain, please? If I need to correct this I will.” He listens, letting you vent and get your frustration out. He never had siblings nor any real family to relate your experiences with like you did, but he understood the mounting weight of words. There was only so much one could take before even the strongest shoulders crumble. “I’m sorry they hurt you.” He reaches to squeeze your knee in reassurance. “I could have Barbatos explain the matter to them, if you allow it.”

You sniff and give him a watery smile. “Thank you but I have to express this myself- I just needed some time away from them.” You cover his large hand with both of yours and squeeze back. “Thanks for listening.” Diavolo rumbles warmly, eyes locking with your warm hands.

“Anytime mi giglio,” He leans back onto his heels. “If I’m honest, their little jabs are utter baseless garbage.”

“Yeah?” You chuckle wiping your nose with his gifted handkerchief. “You don’t think I’m some boring sentimental human?” He shakes his head letting out a dismissive snort. You are beautiful and if Asmo was too blinded by his own standards and routines then it was his loss. He loves the character and different textures of your body. He loves your permanent laugh lines and the way your skin by your eyes crinkle when you smile. The way your nose scrunches when you are happy just makes him glow when in your presence.

Even the tiny scars and marks on your skin told stories that his body never could be able to do. He envied the way human lives could be seen through their bodies, the stories their bodies tell with or without them knowing was amazing. Demons, with their smooth lines, tight hard skin, and hidden agendas couldn’t do that. The idea of “gate-keeping” as you called it was a completely new contempt to him, and sounded ridiculous too. It was counterintuitive to his whole program. If you enjoyed the programs and culture then why were the brothers chastising you over it? He makes a mental note to find time off to take you to enjoy some of the sights of his Devildom without the brother's judgment.

“No. You- you,” He waves his free hand in the air trying to find words that won’t embarrass him. “You are fascinating and so unashamed of your interests. The life you live is unlike any demon or fallen angel could ever comprehend. If they tease you on such trivial things then that speaks to a fault in their character, not yours.” He lets them hang in the air between you, not wanting the meaning to be lost in useless banter.

The silence between you was comfortable and Diavolo basked in it. Normally silence was always tense around him, everyone always waiting for a decree or punishment. Right now though there is none of that. “Wise words, where did you get them?” You move away to pat at your blotchy face, trying to wipe away the tear stains.

Diavolo huffs at the loss of your soft touch. “Little D.” He jokes, voice deadpan. You laugh turning to face him. “There we are!” He cracks a small grin already feeling your mood relax. Leaning in close he wipes away a stray tear. “Feeling a bit better?  Perhaps we can-” Your phone buzzes from your discarded bag making you jump apart. You rush over digging through the bag to grab the blasted device looking at the rapid-fire amount of texts and calls all come in at once. “The brothers?” Diavolo sighs cursing their interruption. He can see the long streams of text bubbles scroll by in the reflection of your damp eyes.

“Yeah.” You look up from your screen. “They are wondering where I am.” Diavolo grimaces not even trying to hide his feelings. You glance back at the phone with little interest, then shrug powering it off. “I think I can let them stew in it for a bit, don’t you? Mind if I crash here for the night?” The Devil perks up, gold eyes following the trajectory of your phone as you toss it. The decorative case disappearing into the cushions.

“I couldn’t agree more.” He claps his hands together in excitement. “Come! Read me one of the stories Satan found jejune. I think I have a few Devildom children's stories on a shelf somewhere to share too!” Diavolo gets up already deciding which room you will stay in for the evening. Perhaps if he plays his cards right you could stay the weekend.

[hakasims]

So people are talking about the deleted scene where Joe and Nicky touch foreheads, and the general mood in the fandom varies from aww I wish we could have seen it to lol those drama queens he just left for groceries, and it’s all good fun. Well, sorry to be the buzzkill, but...

I am genuinely pissed.

When a scene gets cut, it’s usually explained away with pacing and how it killed the momentum of the movie. I call bullshit. Let’s talk about Andrei’s plane.

That sequence is important in many ways: exposition, character details, Nile’s resourcefulness, the “play dead” setup, and the action. But! We spend nine fucking minutes on that plane. That’s more than the Marrakesh portion and about as much time as the entire South Sudan sequence. If you’re looking for a momentum killer to cut, make the plane scene shorter or break it up. In fact, there’s a moment after Andy decides to get some sleep and before she wakes up with her arm tied down that desperately needs a transition to show the passage of time. It’s a perfect spot to take a break from the plane and check on the rest of the guard. Maybe in some kind of, I don’t know, domestic scene where Joe brings Nicky groceries to cook dinner for everybody? After Andy jumps off the train to go find Nile, Joe and Nicky disappear from the movie for twenty whole minutes. If Booker can get a short scene on the phone with Andy, why can’t Joe and Nicky get the head boop?

But here’s the main reason the deleted scene is important.

You may not have noticed that because Joe and Nicky are the pillar of this fandom, but their screen time is around 31 minutes out of 114 (which is The Old Guard’s runtime without the credits). To clarify, that’s not the amount of time their faces or bodies appear on screen. That’s the approximate cumulative length of the sequences in which they partake. This 31 minutes includes the numerous instances where Joe and Nicky are present but off-screen while other characters are the focus. But wait, there’s more.

Out of those 31, 26 minutes are the scenes they share with the rest of the guard, and only the other 5 minutes have Joe and Nicky but don’t have Andy, Nile or Booker. Those scenes are, in order: the homophobic van, the torture lab, and the fight with Keane. Noticing a pattern yet?

But wait, you might say, aren’t there any scenes that only feature Nicky and Joe and no one else? Why, yes, of course there are. A whole sixty-five fucking seconds of them. And those 65 seconds are divided between two scenes: “that time in Malta” and the aftermath of the Keane fight. Both iconic moments, but again, can you see what they have in common? They both come right after something horrible happens to them on screen, whether it’s Nicky being tortured or Joe having to watch the love of his life getting his brains blown out.

And I get it: in terms of pure function, Joe and Nicky are the least important members of the Guard. Andy is the leader who goes through the arc; Nile is the newcomer, the audience surrogate and more; and Booker is the traitor who drives the story. Joe and Nicky... get kidnapped. Plot-wise, they’re the sexy lamps. Nevertheless, they’re the groundbreaking, history-making fan faves, so like... maybe they deserved one, just one intimate moment that didn’t come after immense suffering? Just one little head boop. Forty seconds of screen time would have done it. Like, did we really need that conversation about god between Andy and Nile on that fucking plane? We didn’t. We needed the head boop. You know how I know this? Because literally nobody (including the rest of the movie) is talking about Nile’s faith but literally everyone would make memes and meta about the head boop. We’re already doing it and we haven’t even seen the head boop.

So yeah, that’s why I’m pissed. Not only would the deleted scene have benefited the pacing rather than kill it, but it would have made the world better. I resent the reality in which we have been denied the head boop, and so should you.

#ReleaseTheHeadBoopCut

[gb-patch]

Ask Answers (March 3rd, 2021)

Here’s our latest batch of anon ask answers! Thanks for waiting for them.

Will there be a 'Our Life' game for each season? Please say we're getting a winter one! 

As of right now we’re only planning on making two, summer and fall. They take quite a while to finish and we’re not sure where we’ll be when the second OL is truly wrapped up. But it’s not impossible we can do a third. Though, four Our Life games is probably not super likely, honestly, aha. Maybe the third game, if we make one, could be switch between winter and spring or something.

What engine/engines do you use to make your games? 

We use Renpy for all our projects!

For version 1.2 of OL, did you make any changes to the DLC? If so, could you post a changelog detailing what exactly (or at least a general overview)? If it's not too much trouble, could you also elaborate on the bugs/errors you fixed in the base game? 

There aren’t really any changes to the DLCs, except for the voiced name DLC getting an expansion. We fixed very few small typos and added a couple extra lines. Unfortunately, we don’t have a list of exactly what all the little fixes were.

I've been playing OL and I love the characters! As soon as Baxter showed up, I knew I wanted to learn more about him! Would you consider adding him as a prospective LI in the future? 

Yep, Baxter (and Derek) will be getting his own romance story as an optional DLC late in 2021! Glad you like him.

Hellooo! First off I'm a huge fan of the game and can't stop playing it. However, I was wondering about how much domestic life with Cove we'll get to see in step 4. Meaning the time before the wedding and the time after. In my game Cove and I talked about having children and I was hoping that would be an option in step 4. Either way, I cannot wait for the release and I send my best to everyone working on the production :) thanks! 

I’m sorry, there’s no children or scenes after the two are married. There’s sort of endless possibilities for what that future could be like, so we unfortunately can’t depict it. You only get scenes before they’re married and, if you get the wedding DLC, you can see the day they get married. It ends there, though. But thank you for the well-wishes!

Hello! I was just wondering, so step 4 is going to be similiar to the prologue/epilogue scenes of the game. Is the Wedding DLC going to be one long scene too or will that have moments? (I love the game by the way, its ruined all other visual novels for me in the most wonderful way <3 ) 

Yeah, Step 4 and the wedding DLC will be like the prologues/summer ended parts of the game. There won’t be separate Moments you can play in any order. I’m really happy you like the game so much!

You said that the OL MC's birthday can't be in summer, but what if you headcanoned it to be? 

You can headcanon it as being in summer! There just aren’t birthday events in the game even if you do know your MC was born in summer. We had to leave those out, since some people might not want their MC to be born in summer and then they’d miss out on extra birthday scenes because of it. It wouldn’t have been fair.

Hello!😺 I absolutely love your game!😻 I can't wait for DLS with Derek and Baxter. And I wonder if Baxter could have seen Cove and MC at the party during their first failed dance? Or is Baxter only paying attention to who he's dancing with, or is he not dancing with anyone at the soiree at all then? 

Baxter isn’t really paying attention to the couples on the floor. He’s just cruising the outskirts for someone available to dance with him. So he doesn’t get any memories of the MC or Cove at that party if the two just dance with each other. It’s great to hear you like the game!

time-wise/step-wise when does the nsfw dlc take place? 

It’s not super strict in terms of an exact of weeks/months, but generally it’s sometime not long after the end of Step 3.

Heya! I'm currently obsessed with Our Life (I played through the entire game on Valentine's Day, hahaha– ha... hah), and I have one silly question: if I start playing Step 3 with the less... "romantically inclined" interest levels (Fond & Disinterest), is there still a chance of getting a romantic ending with Cove? Can Cove and the MC realize "they're the one for me" in just one summer? Or... are confessions off the table completely unless at least at Crush level? Thank you in advance! 

So happy you’re having fun with it! In OL1 deciding that Cove is your friend means he’s truly only a friend. You can’t decide you have a crush partway through. But we are considering doing things differently in future games.

hey i have some questions about our life

a) is there a way to be friends with that mean bowlcut kid or is he always... like tha

b. what is coves ethnicity?

A. He is always like that, haha. At least as a kid, he does grow up to be different~

B. Cove’s mom Kyra is white, but Cliff’s race doesn’t come up and players are able to headcanon it. So Cove is half white and half whatever you prefer Cliff to be. 

how do you get to the two mc cut-in scenes from the new update?

&

Hiii! I'm doing another playthrough (it's only like my 100th time playing through the entire game) after the 1.2 update, and I was wondering how to get the new art? I also really love all the new stuff, thank you for working so hard and creating such a wonderful game :)

You can check our our CG guide on Steam for that! Thank you for the kind words.

Sorry to bother you, but I have a question about the Patreon moment. Will there be initiative settings there too? And if there aren't, will the MC lead the whole thing or will Cove lead at certain points too? Thank you~ 

There will still be flexibly in what you’re comfortable with and whether you want Cove to automatically do things or for choices to always be involved :]. And you don’t need to apologize!

Hello!! I wanted to ask a couple of questions about Our Life:

1. Will we able to buy all the DLC via Steam or will there be some of them only available in Patreon? Just to know if I should create a Patreon user XD

2. Will Our Life: Now and Forever be about the current MC, Cove and the other characters or will it be a game with a New MC, new romantic options and new characters?

1. There will be a Patreon-only NSFW bonus Moment. But all the normal planned DLCs will release on Steam.

2. Our Life: Now & Forever is about new characters- new MC, new family, new LI, etc.

just some small bug I noticed: even if you didn't ask Cove to dance, if he asks you at the Soiree in Step 2 later and you say yes to dancing, the MC acts like they got to dance with Cove again even if it was the first time. 

Thank you for the report on that! We thought it was fixed, but I guess it didn’t work.

I was messing around with the new update and I noticed that all the hands in the firefly CGs have the same skin tone regardless of what you put in, (with the exception of the really dark skin color) is this a glitch or something? 

The skin tones aren’t the same. It’s just because they’re out at night with only fireflies for light that it makes each image look dark and therefore similar. But if you line them up together it’s clear how there are changes in every option.

How long did it take to plan out and write the story for OL? Not including the programming, art stuff, or the DLC chapters, I mean just planning and writing the base game story alone. The base game story seems hefty as is, and then on top of that there's the changes to scenes depending on MC's and Cove's personalities and relationship, I'm curious how long that took 

It took basically the full development time, aha. I’m someone who doesn’t fully outline a project before start and instead continues to come up with stuff as a project progresses. There were new parts to the story being created right up to near the launch. So, starting in 2016 or so to later 2020, with some breaks/hold-ups throughout that time.

Hello! I'm really, really enjoying Our Life: Beginning and Always, it was the kind of sweet, wholesome content I needed during these past months. I had a quick question, will you be making any female characters for the MC to romance? In this game or any others like it? I'm a lesbian and I'd love to have a female love interest with such well written romance as yours! Thank you so much. 

Thank you for the nice comment! Our Life: Beginnings & Always won’t have a female LI since we didn’t want to treat other gender options as second fiddle to the male lead. But we have just started full production on Our Life: Now & Forever, which will have a starring female LI! There’s a silhouette glimpse of her Step 1 self here~

-------------------------------------------------

Thanks everyone for sending the questions :D

FAQ   If you prefer to just see the main posts without all the asks/reblogs, feel free to follow our side account instead: GB Patch Updates Bl

[my-emotional-self]

Toxic Love Chapter 7

Pairings: Steve Rogers x Reader, Bucky Barnes x Reader, Steve Rogers x Reader x Bucky Barnes

Summary: Finding out your soulmates were Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes was one thing.  But when someone from your past comes back to haunt you, you have to figure out if a relationship with two super soldiers is something you really want to pursue or if you’d rather go back to your comfortable single life.

Series Warnings:  18+, Swearing, Angst, Fluff, past mentions of rape, self-harm, attempted rape, domestic violence, stalking, death threats, possible Dark!Steve?, Steve will be an asshole a LOT in this series but I don’t know how dark it will get, explicit sexual content, mental health issues, kind of A/B/O dynamics but not really (no they are not actual wolves, more like the hierarchy), mentions of suicide, flashbacks of suicide, nightmares

A/N: There will be no taglist for this story!  I apologize in advance!

8 Years Ago – Age 17

“Y/N, do you know why you are here?” the shrink asked from across the large desk.  You looked down at the typical uniform of a patient at a psychiatric ward.  Yes you knew why you were in here.  A few months ago you witnessed your father’s dead corpse hanging in your living room.  The next thing you knew you were writing a suicide note of your own and your foster parents found it before you could do anything.  Now, you were stuck in a psych ward, probably until you at least turned 18.

“Yep,” came your short response.  

The shrink glanced down at her papers in front of her, going through all of your notes.  “We want to help you as best we can Y/N.  You’ve been through some very traumatic experiences in your life and you’ve witnessed a great deal.  We are going to get you all the help you need.”

3 Months Later

“Have you heard of Borderline Personality Disorder Y/N?” your psychiatrist, Dr. Wang asked.  

That made your head snap in her direction.  Here you were, still stuck in the psych ward after three months and you weren’t sure why.  “I’ve heard of that, yes.  But I thought I was just depressed,” you mumbled, chewing on your fingernail.  

You were clinically diagnosed with depression shortly after coming here.  

“Well, that’s what we originally thought at first.  But the longer you’ve spent time here, the more I and the rest of the staff have discovered it is BPD.  You’re intense mood swings, combined with your ongoing feelings of emptiness and the intense bouts of anger you have are all signs of BPD. We are going to switch up your medications and that will really help with your mood swings and anger issues.

~~~

 No matter how hard you tried, sleep never came to you that afternoon.  You tossed and turned all afternoon in your bed and nothing seemed to be working.  Not only that, but you were really starting to get more irritable as the day went on and you knew it was time to change the dosing of your medication.  It was like clockwork, every year to year and a half. The only problem was that you couldn’t leave the tower without Steve, Bucky or an anyone else.  How were you supposed to get an appointment with your Psychiatrist if you couldn’t leave the tower alone?  This only increased your anger and frustration as you got out of bed to get ready.    

You brushed your teeth and put on a some jeans and a t-shirt, not really caring what you threw on. All of the specific clothing you wore for work was in the closet of your game room along with your makeup and accessories.  

Upon leaving your room, you saw Steve and Bucky sitting at the island in the kitchen of your shared apartment.  They both looked deep in thought over some paperwork and you assumed it was for work.

Grabbing a bottle of water from the kitchen, you were about to head into the elevator as you didn’t want to disturb them, but Steve spoke up and caught your attention.  “Where are you off to?”

“Oh, umm, I’m heading down to my game room.  I’m going to work tonight,” you mumbled out as you pressed the button for the elevator. You noticed it was on the ground floor and it would take a few minutes to get to your level.  

“What time do you plan on being done?” Steve questioned.  

You huffed in annoyance, already irritated as anger began to creep through your bones.  “I don’t know.  Whenever I get done,” you snapped.  Immediately you felt regret, but sometimes your emotions got the better of you when you were in dire need of a medication change.  

“Hey, what’s with the attitude?” Steve commanded as he got up from his seat and stalked over to you, hands on his hips.  You noticed Bucky looking at you from his seat with furrowed brows.  They had never seen you angry like this.  You were always so compliant and easy going.  

“Look, I’m sorry.  I’m just tired is all.”

Steve looked at you sharply, his lips in a thin tight line.  “Alright.  Just make sure you get to bed at a reasonable time tonight.  Promise?”

“I promise,” you answered back.  

~~~

In the comfort of your game room, you quickly got to work.  Digging through your closet, you decided on a light pink tank top that said ‘Gamer Girl’ in black letters with two gamer controls on it.  Since your webcam only showed your top half, you threw on a black pair of cotton shorts to be comfortable.  

Next, you put your hair up in space buns, making sure they were situated just right so they wouldn’t be in the way of your headphones.  You put on your typical game night makeup: bright pink eyeshadow with dark smoked out liner, some mascara and blush and you were good to go.  

Turning on your monitor, you began to power everything up and once that was done, you logged in. Immediately your followers started putting in their messages off to the side and you smiled as you read them. You always tried to read as much of them as you could.  

As the night went on, you knew you should pack it up and listen to what Steve said; getting to bed at a descent time and getting rest.  But you were having way too much fun tonight and so were your followers. It was one of the best nights you’d had in months and not just money wise.  

Ignoring the clock you continued to play and interact with your followers with the microphone that was attached to your headphones.  Every so often you would glance to your messages box and see what some of them had said.  Most of them were cheering you on but of course you always had some haters in there as well.  

It was when you noticed the screen name of one of them that made your blood run cold.  JSmith20. ‘It can’t be’ you thought to yourself, trying to keep as composed as possible as hundreds of people were watching you game in this very moment.  

John’s last name is Smith and he always told you how his favorite number was 20, because that was how old you were when you met him.  No, but he’s still in prison.  He hasn’t gotten out.  He’ll be in there for many more years to come.  It had to be one of his friends right?  The same friend that had been delivering those letters to your old apartment.  ‘Yes, that’s right.  It’s just one of his friends trying to torment you’ you thought to yourself.  

Then, the person behind that screen name typed a message into your message box.  

Hey babe.  Do you miss me yet?  I can’t wait to see you – J

Yep, your composure went out the window reading the message.   Then another message from him popped up.  

I see you are no longer living in that little one bedroom apartment.  Did you really think you could up and move and I wouldn’t be able to find you?  Oh babe, how cute.  I will find you and we will meet again soon.  I promise – J

As you stared at the words on your screen, you heard groans from the other players on your team.  You had just lost the game.  

“Shit,” you swore, anger bubbling up inside of you.  “Fucking damnit!”  You slammed your fist on the desk.  

You rarely lost games. Losing always put you in a foul mood. But because of already being irritable and your emotions on over drive, losing just made everything worse.  

Looking at the clock it was just before five in the morning so you logged off and shut everything down.

You took your hair out of the buns, immediately feeling the tension in your head ease.  Ever so quietly, you opened the door and poked your head out into the hallway.  It was bitch black so you used your phone as a flashlight and tiptoed to the elevator. Before pressing the button on the elevator, you paused.  What if the noise of the elevator woke up Steve or Bucky?  You had promised Steve that you would get to bed at a descent time and seeing as it was just about five in the morning, well, you kind of figured you’d be in trouble.  

Instead, you opened the door to the stairs which was situated right next to the elevator.  At least taking the stairs would be much quieter.

You climbed the stairs up a few levels until you reached your living level and you waited on baited breath for a few moments.  Nothing. Nothing but silence.  As quiet as a mouse, you snuck through the door and dashed to your room, thanking your lucky stars that the palm scanner didn’t make any noise.  

You took a nice hot shower, washing off all of your makeup and the stress of the last few hours.  As much as you wanted to forget John messaging you, it wasn’t going to happen, neither was any sleep.  

Rather than even bothering to get into bed and try to relax, you sent an email to your psychiatrist letting her know that you would more than likely need a dose change on your medications.  Frantically typing away at the email, you explained how you were beginning to get irritated and it was harder for you to control your bouts of anger.  

Luckily for you, Dr. Wang was an early bird and she emailed you right back.  She wanted you to come see her for an appointment and your heart immediately dropped.  That wasn’t going to happen as one of your rules was that you weren’t allowed out of the tower by yourself.  And as much as you liked Darcy, you couldn’t trust her to go with you and not say anything to Steve or Bucky.  

Typing out your reply, you explained that you were unfortunately not able to meet in person and if there was anything else that could be done.  After you hit sent, you began to pace in your apartment, clearly on edge with everything going on.  You just wanted to feel better; you hated feeling this way.  It was as if you weren’t in control of your body and you definitely weren’t in control of your emotions.  

A notification came through your laptop and you rushed towards it, almost tripping over your feet. As you read her words, you could have cried right then and there.  She had agreed to a phone call appointment and she had time right now to discuss things with you.  

Grasping your phone, you dialed her number.

“It’s good to hear from you Y/N,” Dr. Wang stated as she answered the phone.  

“Oh Dr. Wang it is so good to hear your voice.”

She let out a soft chuckle. “Yes, it has been a little over six months since we’ve last spoken.  How are things going with you?”

“Where to begin,” you started off saying.  You let her know that you indeed met your soulmates and had moved in with them. You went over the rules that Steve had given you and she made you feel better as she stated she had seen way worse rules.  Hell, she said your rules were like a walk in the park compared to some she has heard.

“Alright, now, let’s get down to business.  How are you feeling these past few days?” she asked curiously.  

“Ugh, not good. Moving was stressful but I have been feeling really irritated over the last few and I’ve had a few bouts of anger rush through me that makes me want to punch something, but I’ve luckily been able to hold back on that.”

“What about any risky behaviors such as reckless driving, spending sprees, binge eating, drug abuse or sabotaging anything positive in your life?”

“Not yet,” you stated. You knew the routine.  She was going over all the symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder to see what has changed with you.  

“Ok good.  How about any intense fears of abandonment or rejection?”

That question always hit you like a punch to the gut.  The only reason you had stayed with John for so long was because of that right there. He purposely wouldn’t let you see Dr. Wang or he wouldn’t take you to get your medications refilled and because of that, you were starting to feel those feelings; not wanting to be abandoned no matter what.  

“Nope,” you replied.  

“Ok then.  I am going to increase the dosing on your current medications but I want to warn you.  Without you coming in and personally seeing me and without getting some blood work done, I don’t know how well this dosing is going to work, if it will work at all. We might need to discuss changing the medication all together,” she stated.  

“I understand Dr. Wang. And do you think maybe you could prescribe some sort of sleep medication for me too?”

“I can prescribe a one week trial of a sleeping medication for you.  After that, I really need you to try and come see me in the office and we can discuss that further.  Now, did you want me to send these prescriptions into your regular pharmacy?”

“Yes, that would be great. Thank you so much Dr. Wang.”

“No worries at all Y/N. Give the office a call and get an appointment set up.”

“I will.  Thanks again.”

Now that you had your medications all taken care of, you had to figure a way to leave the tower so you could get them.  

[error606notfound]

Characterizing Genshin Characters!!

May write multiple parts for this, but here is my idea of what these people would be like in relationships in order to write better fanfics for them!

Childe

he would totally be the asshole-ish but amazing boyfriend

definitely a bit more like a lot cynical, but still is a hopeless romantic deep down, would absolutely never admit that

top love languages for him, receiving wise, would definitely be physical touch, maybe words of affirmation and quality time too?? but physical touch is the most important for him

SUCH a touchy boyfriend!!!

he’s the type that would buy you gifts for no reason other than it reminded you of him, or you mentioned wanting something in passing

very much “oh, you said you really liked green and I noticed your dress had a tear, and I saw this emerald dress in a window and decided to buy it for you! it’s no big deal, my love!”

however,, his main toxic trait would definitely be thinking that money can fix his wrongdoings

I can so see him leaving you a satchel bursting with mora after getting into a huge fight with a note to get something nice for yourself, and that he’s sorry

has a really hard time just saying sorry, this dude is a total man's man and already struggled with showing vulnerability before the abyss incident, he is so inept emotionally

hopefully you can change that in him, that's why words of affirmation would be a possibility for one of his love languages because he would have a hard time believing you at first but even hearing that you’re there for him no matter what would help him a lot

has such a hard time opening up though, honestly a defense mechanism at this point

he’s been around so many people and enemies that would use those vulnerable emotions against him that he sometimes lies about the littlest things because his immediate thought is that it’ll be used against him or even worse, someone else will find out he opens up to you and use you against him

man has a lot of enemies

however, he keeps you safe and would obviously kill anyone who looks at his darling in any way he or you don’t like

may or may not come back into your home at ungodly hours of the morning covered in blood if he finds out anyone was harassing you about anything

"oh, this? it's nothing, my angel, I just decided to go late-night hunting for pigs! <3" ...Ajax, honey, we know it's winter and there are no pigs out in the wild right now... anyways-

he is also most definitely the kind of guy who would make jabs at you (lovingly of course) for not being able to do something, before taking it over from you like you can just say you wanna help me cook, I know how to chop carrots for soup

"wow, good thing I was here, huh honey? your poor little dainty hands can't even chop some potatoes?" he definitely has a shit-eating grin on his face as he wraps his arms around you and takes over, I very much see him loving a calm domestic life

man definitely wants a big family, he just sees his work with the fatui as a hurdle to cross before he can safely have one

would absolutely be a dumbass and challenge you on every tiny little thing

"I bet I can drink this scalding hot tea faster than you" "I bet I can chop these vegetables faster than you" "I bet I can slurp the loudest while we eat this ramen"

this is of course an excuse to win and get a kith kith from you when he does

if he loses though, he will either absolutely expect you to steal a kiss from him (and be lowkey smug about it if you do, but if you don't and choose literally anything not involving him as a prize he would absolutely pout about it)

also, if you can fight, he will duel you and actually take that as a challenge seriously

not to the point of hurting you but his normal smug demeanor is toned way down until he's got you pinned or vice versa, then he lets himself have a little more fun with the situation

in his mind, how much is he really worth if he can't prove that he can protect his beloved at any time, even against themselves?

he'll let you win here and there, of course maybe

I can also see him being really into formal dancing for some reason?? i feel like he would want to be really well rounded as a whole, would feel pride in being a jack of all trades, not to mention an opportunity to sweep you off your feet?? he'll take it any day of course

would also be the best at making hot dishes, since he would cook for his siblings at home, and Snezhnaya is mad cold, so of course when the weather gets colder around you guys he makes bomb ass hot cocoa and amazing soups

Kazuha

he would be such a softie all around, unlike Tartaglia, this man is super in tune with his emotions

would definitely have touch and words of affirmation tied for his love languages, he would absolutely love if you read him poems while combing your fingers through his hair, laying on your lap and watching the stars go by under the shimmering night sky

I think he would be hard to get into a relationship with at first

he's super in tune with his emotions but I can see him being completely oblivious to those of others

you would have to pretty much point blank shout at him that you're in love with him for him to be like "oh... really?"

gets much easier once you're together though, he eventually figures out how you tick and knows your emotions almost as well as his own

would definitely want to explore the world with you, he would almost insist that you both get a boat together and live as nomads once you're serious about the relationship

he would very much be a calm, relaxed and laid-back type of partner, it would take a lot for him to get angry, and he would rather just talk it out before it even gets to that point?? he understands negative emotions are unavoidable but he hates seeing you upset, and hates even more being upset at you

i feel as though his only toxic trait would be not knowing when to leave you alone if you're quick to anger or lashing out

he seems like the type to be more caught up in fixing the issue before thinking that you might need space to think things through

which is a little ironic because I can see him immediately needing to go for a walk if you are the one to make him upset

overall though he would be one of the best people when it comes to openness and communication

not to mention fighting would be so rare while with kazuha

would absolutely call you the cutest pet names, definitely inspired by his hometown and poetry he knows you like

I also feel like kazuha can dance quite well, but not in a ballroom sense like childe, more like the dance during the festival scenes in Tangled; just super free and fun dancing, he probably learned it while he was on the crux honestly

kazuha would definitely be the type of partner to make you come out of your shell and try new things, how could you say no when his eyes are so sincere?

his whole aura just radiates assuredness and sincerity, you feel like you can do anything when you're around him

he's not much of a family man, simply just not thinking too much about it. his life has been so hectic and he just doesn't see the nomadic lifestyle as one to bring a child into, but if you happen to get pregnant/find a child that needs a home, he would absolutely kill being a dad

he would encourage a child to follow their dreams to whatever extent they need to, and assuming you fight too, you would both train him in the art of fighting as well as poetry

lets be real, you guys would do a great job raising a kid together, especially if you're a little more grounded to counteract kazuha's carefree nature

Hu Tao

oh my gosh she would literally be the funniest person to date ever, you cannot change my mind

she has a bit of a hard time in her profession, especially when hearing what others think of her, but she powers through it, attributing it all to her admittedly grotesque career

I feel like her biggest love language would be acts of service? she knows its a little hard being around someone who's so excited about death, so she definitely goes out of her way to show you she's still happy being on the mortal plane with you <3

would purposely do things to freak you out, like the pranking queen she is

you can expect to have her jump out from a dark corner of your room after you're out the shower, making you almost become a customer on the spot

her toxic trait would probably be not knowing when to take what you're saying seriously, whether it's on purpose or accidentally

I can see her kinda blowing off what you say whenever you get concerned for her in her career, or whenever she makes you a little too fearful with her talking about death like it's nothing

if you can match her energy and philosophy on life and death though, it wouldn't be too big of an obstacle in that aspect

she would totally offer to take you with her when she's working with spirits, if you're not too bothered by it or once you've gotten a little more used to her career

you would absolutely wake up in the middle of the night to find her out of bed, and you would find her in the lobby of the funeral parlor working on a cadaver that needs to be prepared soon

absolutely endearing how into her job she is, and how much care she puts into making sure people are sent to the afterlife as respectfully and perfectly as possible

she'll "joke" about hoping she's alive longer than you to make sure your funeral is perfect as well, and you're just like "my love, my dear, I appreciate the thought, but please don't-"

she'll offer to teach you the practices since you're around so often, and let's be real, a lot of people are put off by you dating her anyways considering her career, so it would definitely be the easiest job to get

also more time around your girlfriend?? who is adorably passionate about her job?? who could turn that down

you would definitely end up running the parlor as her right hand, and then tease her with the same dark jokes she did with you as well

"oh so it's funny when you joke about putting me in the coffin, but I can't joke about wanting to give my wonderful girlfriend a perfect ritual too?"

jk she would find it absolutely adorable that you would want to ensure a good passing for her too

wow that's a lot more death than i anticipated writing about for her but its definitely in character

she is such a passionate person in every aspect of her life though, and it shows in everything she does

I feel like the most she would ever fight about is her job, but other than that she isn't the type to confront others, and her happy-go-lucky demeanor prevents a lot of fights from happening at all

you just can't be mad at someone so adorable honestly

since I mentioned dancing with the other two, might as well add it in here; hu tao CANNOT dance. at all. but she loves doing it!!

she would totally take you to parties with her, and drag you on the dance floor doing the worst moves you've ever seen

you honestly debate whether she's just joking or not before she tries getting you to do the cringey moves with her too like please tell me I'm not alone in thinking she would get on the floor and do fornite dances or some dumb shit oh my god

"babe cmon do the orange justice with me"

your face is just red and you're like "hu tao, darling, please let's just get off the floor, we can start taking lessons together-"

she absolutely refuses though, that takes all the fun out of it!!

it grows on you though, as does a lot of the things she does

she also strikes me as the type to purposely do things just for shock value, nothing mean but just odd things

like milk before cereal odd

you would wake up in the morning and catch her cooking an egg in a ladle or something and you're just standing, horrified as she laughs so hard she drops the whole thing and nearly burns her foot

she just is naturally so funny you can't even be mad at her ridiculous antics, they're just as endearing to you as her passion for her job

your life will be full of laughter with this one, you'll probably have abs after the first month of dating as long as her humor is on-brand for you

slight NSFW, she would also make the dumbest jokes while doing the dirty

ALSO she would absolutely be a sucker for hand holding

i feel like she can be kind of touchy but the place she loves you touching the most are her hands, she just loves when you trace circles with your thumb on her knuckles while holding it

or just holding her hand and tracing along the little lines in her palm

bonus points if you crack a joke about palm reading while doing that

"i see.. a super sexy and cool partner in your future"

"aw really? I was hoping you'd see us kissing.. haha jk... unless-"

buying her rings is also the key to her heart

she would literally always wear the one you got her, no matter what

[boop-le-snoot]

PARTY FAVOURS | CHAPTER 2

Rating: Explicit. 18+

‼️TW: Reader is EIGHTEEN! Recreational drug use, smoking and alcohol consumption, deeply internalised self-loathing, very questionable moral standards. Daddy kink taken half-seriously. BDSM themes in later chapters - explicit content will come with it’s own TWs. FIRST PERSON POV.

Summary: You’re Peter’s classmate, a child of rich and famous but uncaring parents. Getting paired up for a lengthy project with the boy was an interesting turn of events and you don’t know whether to feel blessed or cursed when you develop, seemingly, a perfectly normal, harmless crush on Tony Stark. Fueled by feelings of inadequacy and boredom, your life spirals out of control - and you’re lucky your newfound friends are there to pick up the pieces even if you cannot find it in yourself to believe these amazing human (and not so human) beings voluntarily give you more than a fleeting glance and an offhanded thought. And they brought cake!

A/N: Bad girls are sad girls! Always wondered what goes through the mind of a spoiled, rich but intelligent and perceptive teenager? Have you found yourself craving that adrenaline rush, the danger of a forbidden fruit? Okay. That was cheesy as hell. Gross.

Let’s try again. Sarcasm? Check. Vine references? Hell yes! Crude humour? Check. Blunt honesty? Double check. We’re living in a Lana del Rey song, ladies.

The author doesn’t actually condone codependent relationships in real life. This is a filthy little fantasy. Enjoy, deviants.

THE TAG LIST IS NOW OPEN! @vozit​ @another-stark-sub ​ @mostly-marvel-musings​

Beta read by the lovely and patient @miscmarvelwritings  ! She deserves all the love 💙

Peter woke me up at eight AM the next morning like the little shit that he was, demanding I make him pancakes. It wasn’t the first time I’ve had the joy to experience him in the morning and he knew exactly how to antagonise me enough to make him the special pancakes he liked so much. They had become kind of a ritual whenever he stayed over at my house, which was quite often - teachers liked me enough to pair me up with one of the most sensible kids for any projects that couldn’t be done alone by yours truly on her own.

I put on my yesterday’s dress, applied moisturizer and obediently trotted behind an excitedly mumbling Peter. The kitchen was large, beautiful and delightfully empty of any resident superheroes. I’ve indirectly crossed paths with all of the tower’s residents hanging around Tony, but I’ve yet had to speak more than polite niceties to any of them. 

Spying a bowl of boiled eggs and some sort of weird salad alongside half burned toast on the counter, I suddenly understood why Peter demanded his pancakes. I strictly instructed the disaster child to stay away from my cooking process and set to work with one ear listening to his ramblings and a headphone in the other. 

A set of thumping footsteps appeared behind me as I was pouring the batter for the first pancake. Their owner loudly sat down next to Peter, sighing, groaning, generally making “I’m not a morning person” sounds.

“Good morning, Mr. Barnes,” Peter’s tone was way, way too chipper.

“‘mrng,” The Sergeant grumbled. “Who’s this and why is she making pancakes?”

I turned around, spatula at the ready. “It’s me,” We’ve actually met before, but Barnes had left before I could even come over from my side of the work bench to say hello.

He nodded in acknowledgement after giving me a suspicious once-over. “One of Stark’s science children. I’m James but you can call me Bucky,” His voice sounded rough and gravely, and he clutched a coffee cup half the size of my head.

I snorted. “Science child, sure,” It wasn’t half-bad actually. I wisely choose to ignore the part of being Tony’s. No matter how hot the man was, I wasn’t anybody’s but my own, thank you very much. “Go get the bananas, Nutella and maple syrup, fellow science child.”

Peter scrambled to follow instructions as I plated the pancakes and cut the bananas into neat little rings to fill the sweet circles with. A tablespoon of Nutella, half a sliced banana, wrap, garnish with powdered sugar and pour maple syrup generously on top. I really didn’t see how this could be difficult but any and all attempts to teach Peter how to recreate my masterpiece always ended up in an absolute mess. I turned around to ask Bucky if he wanted any. The look of a man starved answered all my questions.

“You’re a goddess,” Peter moaned around his mouthful, nose smudged white with the powdered sugar.

“Gross, chew first then talk, you neanderthal,” I scoffed, prepping more batter for the second batch of pancakes. I wasn’t sure if everybody would show up but figured it would be rude to exclude them from the sheer magnificence that were my pancakes. I was just that good.

The music in my ear drowned most of Peter’s disgusting chewing noises, thankfully. My second batch vanished into thin air, inhaled by the two males like the garbage disposals that they were. Peter, in particular, ate an alarming quantity of food and I was surprised how he managed to stay so skinny. His daily eating schedule resembled the Hobbits.

More people appeared, this time acting less surprised regarding me standing at the stove. Hawkeye, Black Widow, Scarlet Witch and her brother, all of them wandered in wearing sleep attire with various amusing prints. Thankfully, they mostly kept quiet or chatted with Peter - I would have definitely grumbled if someone tried to talk to me. As far as my body was concerned it was still the middle of the night.

“PANCAKES,” A booming voice announced and I shuddered at the sheer intensity and devotion contained in that one word. Thor.

“Please use your indoor voice,” I snapped reflectively. My brain caught up with what I just did so I hastily backtracked. “Sorry, I’m a bitch in the mornings.”

The blonde man chuckled, coming over to poke his nose into my flurry of pour-flip-fill sequence. Then, with all the grace and manners of a prince, he dipped one (1) large finger into the jar of Nutella and wandered off with it stuck in his mouth. With this turn of events the Nutella was bound to run out sooner than expected.

I turned around, annoyed confusion in plain sight. “The fuck?.. That’s gross, don’t do that,” Finding his brother (adopted!) sitting next to Thor, wearing a haughty smirk, finger still in his mouth. So Loki turned into his brother to steal Nutella from a jar. I sighed. Nobody even batted an eye. “Your alien germs are in there now, double ew.”

“Alien germs? Where?” Bruce entered the kitchen with a tablet under his arm, wearing Hulk themed pajamas, Captain America in tow. I was honestly on the verge of breaking down into hysterical laughter. Domestic Avengers wasn’t something I’d expected to see or experience, ever, much less be a part of. It took a moment for me to remind myself that they were people, too, and each of them was entitled to their own quirks. 

“America, egg-splain,” Peter muttered under his breath, giggling. “Loki stuck his hand in the Nutella jar,” He pointed at said jar. “She got grumpy,” Peter pointed at me. “Don’t make her grumpy, please, I want more pancakes,” And turned his pleading puppy eyes in my direction again.

“This is indentured servitude,” I pointed my spatula at the little shit. “You just had, like, ten.” But I made more batter nonetheless. I must admit it was kind of cool, seeing the earth’s mightiest defenders so relaxed. And Pete being happy, that was just… The best. I don’t know how to explain it. His eternal cheerfulness was highly contagious.

Chuckles filled up the room, the adults chatting and bickering amongst themselves while they patiently waited for their own breakfast. 

“Do you need some help?” Bruce approached me after stopping to fetch himself a cup of tea. It smelled strongly of tangy herbs and honey.

“I need more Nutella and bananas,” I admitted, surveying the sheer amount of people I had to feed. I didn’t doubt the Captain and two Asgardians had an appetite to match Peter’s which meant a literal extra set of condiments was required. Thankfully, Bruce fetched them for me, coming to a stop next to me. “Anything else?”

“You know, I tried making these with Peter and he just ended up with powdered sugar and chocolate all over himself,” I mused, noting the way Banner was carefully observing the assembly of a pancake. “You think Doctor seven-phds can manage to add a few toppings to a pancake without causing a disaster?“ 

Bruce rolled his eyes fondly, bumping me with his hip. "I’m no Clint Barton when it comes to cooking but at least I don’t burn my toast like Steve,” True to his word, his hands made swift motions of filling, wrapping and plating each individual pancake. They were almost as good as mine albeit more messy. I had lots of practice though. We finished off a batch in companionable silence, sounds of the team and my music playing in the background. 

I didn’t notice when I started swaying to the rhythm, catching a confused look from Bruce. I brushed back my hair, revealing a wireless headphone in my ear and he chuckled in understanding. “What are you listening to?”

“Right now? Kings of Leon,” I said, leaning towards him so he could hear the chorus “Use Somebody” currently occupying my right ear. 

“I like them, too,” He said, his cheek gently touching mine. His hands slowed on the pancake, a soft hum vaguely reminding me of the song’s melody emanating from his throat. “What else do you usually listen to?”

“Mostly heavier stuff, but I have a whole separate playlist dedicated to mid-2000s bops,” I answered. “I’ve heard I’m quite old school when it comes to music.”

“Well, I am an old man, so…” Bruce grinned mischievously. “But my guilty pleasure is Lady Gaga,” He admitted with a laugh.

I laughed, too. The image of his dancing in his lab to Born This Way was too much for my brain and I hung my head, fighting giggles. Bruce bumped me with his hip again, faking a pout. “Okay, okay, that was a fucking hilarious image, you go dude,” I finally powered through my struggle to contain laughter. “My own guilty pleasure would be… Umm… Lana Del Rey, I guess.”

Bruce made a vague noise of confusion. I took a brief break from mixing the batter to dig out my second headphone, presenting it to him and switching to a song. “This is what makes us girls”. Despite the fact I have never stolen a car or had a close female friend, the nostalgia was real. “Carmen” followed after the first song and I silently thanked whatever deity that “You can be the boss” was taken out of Spotify - I don’t think I was prepared to share that kind of information with a lab partner. An older, handsome lab partner. Wait… Where did that come from?

“I like it,” He said after the song ended and my more usual stuff began playing. “It suits you, I think.”

I groaned. “Really? I think it’s edgy,” Hiding away the embarrassment, I passed him a tray of freshly baked pancakes, occupying his immediate attention.

“You’re an old soul,” He gave me a lopsided smile. I saw a very faint blush tinting his cheeks, the kind of blush that had me wondering about the meaning behind his words. 

I gave an attempt at a smile in response, the left corner of my mouth barely tilting up. We talked some more about the rock music we shared in our earphones. I had a lot of 80s hair metal and 90s grunge in my playlist. Bruce was not a Curt Cobain man but enjoyed the works of his legacy, Marcy Playground. 

A tan hand wormed its way between me and Bruce, snatching a handful of banana slices and disappeared just as swiftly. “Tonyyy,” Bruce groaned, picking up another banana to replace the stolen pieces.

The spatula in my hand became a weapon as I blindly aimed at the target behind my back. A loud “ow” indicated I hit it. When I turned around, Tony was clutching the side of his face, a hurt look in his eyes and cheeks stuffed full of stolen goods. I stared him square in the face, absolutely refusing to acknowledge the fact that he was shirtless - the arc reactor glowed brightly in the middle of his toned chest. Fuck.

His chest was honestly what I was aiming for. I constantly kept forgetting how short he actually was. There was this one time when Tony had to put his arms around me to steady a piece of tech - he felt huge, hard and enormous around me. 

“What’s that for, Princess?” He finally chewed through his food and found his voice.

“For being a Tony,” I retorted. “Stay away from my workspace and wait for your breakfast like everybody else.”

“Hey! This is my kitchen,” He whined immediately, like the adult man that he was. I nearly cried from how adorable his face became, eyebrows scrunched up. “I don’t want to wait! And why does he,” Tony’s finger accusingly pointed at Bruce, “Get the bananas?!”

“Because he’s Brucie-bear,” I stuck my nose up in the air when Bruce’s arm wrapped around my waist. “He’s my science father,” I stuck my tongue out at Tony, seeing Bruce’s triumphant smile. Banner used every opportunity to get back at Tony’s incessant sass. 

The gleaming in Tony’s eyes should have alarmed me. “But he’s not your science daddy,” Tony’s flirting was accompanied by a salacious eyebrow wiggle and Peter’s screech of “OH MY GOD!" 

It took me every ounce of willpower to not flush. It was one of those rare times that I was at a complete loss of words. Thinking on the spot, I gave a very meaningful look to Bruce - thankfully, he got the gist and returned an equally filthy smirk back. Tony gaped.

"Is this how they are in the lab?” The Captain’s quiet voice leaked horrified amusement.

“All.The.Time.” Peter’s resonating groan was followed by Romanoff’s laughter.

We went up to the lab after breakfast. Thankfully Tony stopped his dramatic bitching when I served him my pancakes, scarfing them down much like everybody else. So me and Pete were accompanied by one (1) happy engineer, all three of us tinkering away on a robot that we were supposed to present in our science class in a month. The focus that was required to solder was immense and our usual banter was missing, replaced by an occasional request for a specific tool or a water bottle.

It took a few hours to get the dirty job done even with Tony’s help (technically he wasn’t supposed to but neither me nor Pete had the heart to forbid him from it when the man looked so content and happy soldering away). By the time I uncurled from my spot on the bench, my back was in knots and my dress had oil stains and holes all over it. I immediately went to the nearest water bottle, finishing half of it in seconds, picking up my phone to see if I had any important messages from my mother.

None.

Just a message from Bruce.

I tapped on my phone, idly scrolling through the Instagram app, liking some pictures of people I barely knew and keeping up a general appearance of being very busy. When the ringtone started playing, it took me a whole five seconds to understand it was, in fact, coming from my phone - I certainly wouldn’t put something so… Outrageous as my main tone.

Banner had discovered the power of the internet. You Can Be The Boss played loudly, and it played from my phone and Bruce was calling me. I picked it up, turning around, fighting the incoming laughter. “Yes, Brucie?" 

To say that Tony’s and Peter’s faces were scandalised was nothing. The boy’s face was such a deep shade of red, I started worrying about his blood pressure and Tony’s mouth hung open limply, like he was witnessing the second coming of Christ. 

"Is Tony sufficiently traumatized?” Judging by the breathless tone of his voice, Banner was resisting a mighty laughing fit of his own.

“Oh, absolutely,” I happily chirped.

“Good, keep it up. Come to my lab before you leave,” Banner snorted and then, realising what he’d done, promptly hung up, the tell-tale beginning of a giggle fit abruptly interrupted by a dial tone.

I put the phone in my bag, gathering the rest of my things with a look somewhere between innocence and indifference. At least, I hoped it was - my mind kept jumping between the engineer’s ridiculously scandalised face and the way his mouth went slack, lips moist and soft and plush. That’s a very dangerous trail.

A very dangerous trail I couldn’t resist exploring in the solitude and privacy of my own bedroom, at home.