#Was that the thing about the 16 personalities?

[yandere-wishes]

hey whenever you can, can you make some yandere d-16

❥༄ؘ I'll do you one better Anon!! How about Yandere D-16 vs Megatron

𝄞 Somebody That I Used To Know (Slowed)

✿˗ˏˋ ✴︎D-16✴︎ ˎˊ˗✿

.☘︎ ݁˖D-16 can't remember when exactly he first noticed the erratic pulsing of his spark straining against his metallic frame when you walked into the room. Just that, after all these cycles, it had remained constant, enrapt. Pulling him to you.

.☘︎ ݁˖D-16 has a tendency to pick at things he likes, things he finds bizarrely blissfulas. He wishes he could leave them alone, leave the questions locked under his tongue and the paint free of servo marks. But he can't, indifference only gets you so far, and while he tries to follow protocol. He can't always let things go. He can't let you go.

.☘︎ ݁˖He watches as you chip away at sedimentary rock, coated in soot as you trek for the liquid lifeline. He can't help but think you look like a princess from those old spark-tales. Circuitella. Dainty and disheveled. He wonders if he should offer to carry your jackhammer on the way back to the barracks. He wonders if his voice box can even form words in your presence. He settles for trailing behind you. Optics darting between the stone walls and the back of your helm. Orian laughs and laughs and laughs. D-16 can't help but see the humor in it all. Irony too early to land.

.☘︎ ݁˖He didn't mean to drag you to the surface. It just so happens that on that exact day, there was a forgotten crate. And in that exact moment, you'd decided to personally deliver it to the surface train. It just so happens he grabs your servo, pulling into the shadow of the crates. Tucked away beneath him. Heading for doom or glory or a grotesque third.

.☘︎ ݁˖D-16 is obsessive, longing for his darling from afar. Desperate for a sliver of your attention, desperate for the shadow of your presence. He can't help but watch you, optics trailing over your gorgeous features. He can't help but dream of the taste of your lips and sturdy touch as he chips away at a vein.

.☘︎ ݁˖He secretly collects little pieces of your essence. Keeping them locked in his chest chamber right above his spark. Chipped paint, a piece of metal from your plating, tiny parts of an old drill you once used. He needs you in ways he can't understand, ways that claw at his processor and spark like the wild beasts Megatrouns used to fight. Needs to hear your voice as you complain about a stiff joint or your breathy giggle as you laugh at him and Orian arguing again.

.☘︎ ݁˖He wishes he could collect stickers of you. Stick them across his frame and watch the iridescent glow under Cybertron's sun. Wishes he could decorate his measly possessions with your radiant smile and sparkling optics.

.☘︎ ݁˖Is it weird that I LOVE the thought of D-16 collecting stickers? Mostly of Megatrous but also of the other primes, famous racers, sentinel prime, etc.

.☘︎ ݁˖The thought of Sentinel Prime having touched you, having stolen a part of you (let alone a part of him) leaves him teetering on lava rage, leaving his spark breaking in ways he didn't know it could.

.☘︎ ݁˖D-16 is still a child, young and new by Cybertronian standards. But age isn't gauged by online cycles now is it? It's measured in accomplishments and opalescent dreams. So maybe the little Sparkling voice screaming in the back of his helm isn't too far off. Crying that by stealing his T-cog, your T-cog. Sentinel screwed up something in your circuitry. Maybe you were always sparkbound. Maybe you were the incarnation of Solus Prime and he, Megatronus. Maybe you where always destined to be together.

.☘︎ ݁˖These thoughts burn his processor during the treacherous trek back home, back to Iacon. Can you even call he even call that cage a home? D-16 hovers closer to you. Growing bolder, even daring to leave his servo on your shoulder pad. Daring to hold your servo and drag you out of danger.

.☘︎ ݁˖"Thanks, D" you chirp cheerfully and he thinks his spark might just erupt. "Yeah it's nothing" he mutters jogging after Orian leaving you behind with a giggling and concerned Elita-one.

.☘︎ ݁˖After "retrieving" Megatronus's T-cog from Sentinel he swears on Primus himself that he shall fuse you with Solus Prime's T-cog solidifying your love. Bounding you to him through every incarnation.

.☘︎ ݁˖D-16 is tragic in every way. His fall makes Cybertron shake, his new scarlet optics send a shiver through the universe. Obsession and subjugation. Anger and Hate. D-16 burns away, you feel it when you kiss him over Sentinel's corpse. The monster in his place bites your lips trying to devour every inch of your. Conquer, Conquer, Conquer

.☘︎ ݁˖Even if Orion Pax/Optimus Prime tries to protect you. Keep you in Iacon safe from the bot he once called brother. There is no way he can stop the newly evolved warlord from hunting you down. D-16 had always been loyal to his obsessions, tearing through everything to feel them under his servos. Although back then -when they'd been happy under a blanket of lies- D-16's obsessions had simply been holographic stickers of tragic heroes. Now it's bloodstained domination. Conformation to a macraber freedom. He's no longer a little minor bot tolling away, he's Megatron now. Hungry monstrous thing raging wars until he has both his darling and Cybertron in his grasp once more. D-16 had always told Orion that he thought you nothing less than a princess. And maybe it has always been true, after all, princesses are a tragedy too.

.☘︎ ݁˖Optimus can't help but shed a tear at the thought as he watches D-16 Megatron roll away...

⋆༺𓆩𓆩Megatron𓆪𓆪༻⋆

✮ Upon your recapture, Megatron isn't too gentle. He's rough and angry. He's betrayed -again- it pricks at his spark like daggers. The first thing Megatron does is force Solus Prime's T-cog into your chassis. He promised you he'd bound you to him, didn't he? Promised you'd be together in every incarnation. And unlike every golden leader before him, Megatron intends to keep every one of his promises.

✮ He loves the sight of you writhing in pain beneath him. Runs his clawed servos over the the raw wires fusing and the circuits crunching into each other. The look of utter pain in your optics has his spark racing like the first time he saw you in the mines. He can't help but kiss you deeply, greedily swallowing your essence.

✮ You can taste his anger on your tongue. You roll the pulp of rage around your mouth swallowing the sadness, the desperation. Letting the taste burn the roof of your mouth. He calls you traitor and darling between each breath. And you can't tell if he wants to kiss your spark or decollate your helm and mount it on the wall of his new ship.

✮ Megatron suffers in shades and flavors that haven't been invented yet, you feel them swatch against your lips in every single one of his raging kisses. He isn't above leaving marks and dents across your armor. He likes you better this way broken and beautiful. Tragedy in every way

✮ He used to hate seeing you scared and defenseless. Now such a precious sight leaves him intoxicated, spark buzzing with overt excitment. He likes this power, feeling you tremble each time he raises his servo. Your life is laced between his digits, he loves tugging it harshly showing you how he controls you in every way imaginable. He likes being the monster that princesses fear. "Circuitella" he whispers under his breath, he knows you don't get the joke.

✮ Megatron likes to kill through you. Intwined digits holding a blaser, his claws on your digits pushing until the trigger releases and the bullets impale the target. He trails open-mouthed kisses across your back afterward. Sharp teeth sinking into the metal of your neck. He pulls you closer locked between his arms. When did he get so big? You remember when he'd been so utterly small. Little minor bot, where is he? Megatron never notices your melancholy optics or the whirl of your processor as it tries to distance itself from the physical world. All he cares about is your body wrapped within his. About the sweet taste of your metal and paint on his tongue.

✮ Megatron's love is lave upon open wounds, painful in every way. Where D-16's love had once been saccharine energon goodies and shy iridescent kisses. But D-16 is dead, he died with Orion all those centuries ago. Only Megatron remains. Lord Megatron, the one who keeps you caged, overpowers you with rough kisses and says "I love you" while pointing a blaser to your spark.

✮ I guess it's worth mentioning that D-16 would never harm his darling in any way but would absolutely avenge her if someone so much as left a scratch on her. Megtran punishes his darling for amusement and also because he loves her submission and fear. But I guess a little D-16 still lives inside him cause he will rip apart anyone who so much as touches his darling.

✮ Sometimes, when the lights are low and darkness begins to play it's ploys. You swear you see D-16 looking at you. Easy smile and bright sunny eyes. Body still tiny, with no pain engraved upon it. But illusions are always so quick to shatter, their precious shards melting under reality's brutal wight. D-16 withers away and in his place Lord Megatron stands. Piercing Claws and teeth gleaming under the dim light. He's gentle when he touches you laying something on your armour. Thin smile as he admires you, ethereal little you before leaving. You always check to see what he's left. It's always an iridescent sticker from his old collection...

[brandwhorestarscream]

If d16 was carrying in the movie that could have saved him.

OOH I HAVE. THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS

Hear me out, ok. Sentinel Prime heavily, heavily advocates for chastity. He very publicly denounces casual intimacy, waxing poetic about how it's a very special thing that should only be shared with someone you truly love and trust. To give yourself away to a stranger in a one night stand or even casually to a friend is one of the greatest disservices one can do to themselves. Interfacing should only be done with your bonded mate. While it's certainly not illegal, their Prime's warm concern and insistence that they're all special and should be treated as such keeps a lot of mecha's panels closed. The vast majority of them are saving themselves for their conjunx endura.

Now, the real reason Sentinel doesn't want them having sex? He doesn't want them breeding. Specifically the lowest of society, he doesn't want his cogless servants sparking each other up and having babies with t-cogs. It would raise too many questions, and while he has no qualms about taking a newspark's cog out before they're presented to their parents, accidents happen. People slip up. Some sparklings come before their parents can get to a hospital. Some nutcases want home births because it's "more intimate and natural". Some just plain don't realize they're carrying until they start having contractions. Cogless bots popping out babies with cogs will only cause problems, so the best way to prevent such a thing is to convince them that chastity is their best option. Most of them die before they can find someone they want to be with forever, and even among those that do, they struggle to save up enough money for a bonding license. Keeping them repressed and chaste is just another means of his control.

Now, as for sweet D-16 >:) he practically worships Sentinel Prime. He has such blind adoration and trust in him. Orion adores him too, of course, but not quite on the same level. He doesn't look at Sentinel with the same stars in his optics, though certainly has boundless respect and admiration for him. When they're visited by the Prime post-Iacon 5000, they're invited up to his personal suite 👀

Consider: instead of getting immediately jumped by Darkwing, they actually do get escorted up there. It's grander than anything either of them have ever seen, a shining and spotless penthouse with a 360° view of the city, expensive chaises to lounge on and bottles of the finest, smoothest high grade, even a jacuzzi! Sentinel Prime meets them there, and, placing a gentle hand on each of their faces, purrs that he wants to reward them.

"I've never seen anything like what you two did today," D-16 whimpers at his praise, beaming sunshine, and Orion is awestruck. "Come... sit with me."

They follow their Prime obediently and he relaxes onto one of the lounges, pulling the two cute little miners down on either side of him. They talk--or rather, Sentinel talks and they hang onto his every word, each tucked under one of his arms and nestled close against his chassis--and eventually he pops a bottle of champagne and pours them each a glass. Neither Dee nor Orion have ever had such high quality energon before: it goes down thick and smooth and warm, sending a blast of heat through their little bodies that pool in their tummies and make them start to squirm and feel woozy. Sentinel prompts they drink the whole thing, each of them, and by the time they're done they're gasping and swaying. So strong! Too strong!

The Prime's huge blue servo slides onto D-16's face, admiring his dazed expression. His optics are flickering, shutters at their halfway point, and he's visibly flushed, mouth dropped open and pretty lips parted as he pants. Swaying gently back and forth like that, Sentinel can't resist. He leans down and kisses him, gentle but controlling, and D-16 makes an honest-to-Primes squealing noise.

As soon as Sentinel pulls back, Dee wavers and collapses back against the chaise, optics blown wide even as an uncontrollable smile splits his face. He starts giggling, covering his face and rocking back and forth as euphoria bubbles out of him in uncontrollable, adorable laughter. "Oh my stars-" he gushes. "Oh my stars omistars omistars wow...!" His first kiss has left him breathless and elated, barely able to speak, worship and the greatest joy imaginable shining in his optics.

Sentinel Prime has them, both of them, in his suite, over and over and over again. They're both virgins, have never touched another mech or been touched in turn, and their leader takes great revelry is breaking their seals. Fucking their tight little valves until they're wailing and cumming in his lap, sobbing in ecstasy into his neck, clumsily kissing at his plating and swearing that they adore him, they love him, please more, more, more! He frags them on the furniture, against the wall, on the floor, even in the hot tub. He has them both on their knees in front of him on the lounge, licking and sucking at his spike and pushing each other to lap up drops of his transfluid, asks them to use their mouths on each other while he watches. He even asks them to bear their sparks and they do: he doesn't share his own but he's glad to tease at theirs, and it reduces them to mewling little piles on the floor, twitching and rocking and moaning as they crash through overload after overload. Such beautiful little pets, so eager to please, he could definitely get used to having them around for awhile.

When their time comes to an end they've started to sober up, snuggled against his sides on one of the lounges, still whimpering and panting high on pleasure, excess charge making them woozy and giggly even though the high grade is nearly out of their systems. Airachnid arrives and doesn't even give them a passing glance, informing the Prime that it's time to depart. He sends them back to their home in the mines, promising to see them again soon, just as soon as he returns from his next crusade to the surface.

D-16 and Orion stumble home giggling and shoving each other, still adjusting their armor and poking at the paint transfers spattered all over them. They're euphoric, there's no other word for it, high as a kite on pleasure, on the knowledge that Sentinel Prime wanted them and they were able to satisfy him! No longer virgins and instead claimed by the Prime!

Their batchmates welcome them home with a cacophony of cheers and hugs and jostling--MINERS! In the RACE! Their very own brothers, in the Iacon 5000! And- wait, why are you two all wet...?

They weren't intending to tell everyone, but the way they look at each other and blush and start snickering and struggling to explain is telling enough. Ratchet is already approaching with a wrench to scold them, they know better than to let a moment of excitement cloud their judgement-

"Uh, w-well-"

"Sentinel Prime wanted to-"

"SENTINEL PRIME?!" The entire room screams out in shock at once, before the cheering resumes tenfold. Their batchmates got the attention of THE Sentinel Prime?! Sentinel Prime made love to their batchmates! A couple of miners got the attention and affection of their Prime! If they thought the Iacon 5000 was inspiring that's nothing compared to this: before you know it the entire sector is mining energon at a lightning fast pace and they've hit their quotas before shift is even a quarter of the way done.

Orion and D-16 happily get to work as well, eager to do their best so that when their dashing Prime returns to them, they can tell him about how hard they worked and how much energon they mined and how well everyone is going to eat because of them!

When Sentinel Prime suddenly returns and orders triple shifts, they're surprised. Very surprised. It's not like him at all! Pretty soon the miners are running on no sleep and little fuel, some are injured and being denied time for repair and seek medical treatment. And D-16, despite his best efforts, is starting to fall behind after several weeks of the brutal demands. He's getting dizzy which he attributes to the lack of recharge. His servos keep dropping things even when he's sure he has a tight grip on them. He's nauseous, all the time, and multiple times a shift stumbles away from the rest of his crew to gag and vomit in a corner of whatever energon vein they're currently working in. Orion tries to get him to slow down, to stop, because he's clearly sick and needs medical care, but Dee isn't willing to stop. "Sentinel Prime needs us, Pax! We can't stop now!"

It all comes to a head as they're dragging themselves out of a tunnel with a full load of raw energon to be refined. D-16 suddenly stumbles, clamping one servo over his mouth and running off to the side. Orion hurriedly follows him after making sure Ironhide and Jazz have got the minecart.

"Hey, easy, easy-" he comes to rub his back as his best friend bends over, servos braced on his knees and body already rolling with slow, threatening heaves. He moans that he doesn't want to, he's so sick of purging, it hurts, please Primus, not today! "C'mon, just, let it out. You'll feel better once it's out, Dee."

D-16 groans and hunches over further, arms wrapping around his middle. "No... Primes, please- hgk-!"

"OI!" A miserably familiar voice suddenly bellows behind them, and Orion's sympathetic expression drops to sheer annoyance. Oh, no. "YOU TWO! Whaddo you think you're doin'?!" Darkwing is storming up to them. "Sentinel Prime wants his energon, so GET BACK TO WORK!"

"Darkwing, please," for once Orion is polite, one servo still braced on his friend's back. "D-16's sick, he needs-"

"I don't CARE what you think he needs!" Their superior roars, grabbing them both by the shoulders and forcing then around to face him. "I said, get back to-"

Dee promptly hurls all over the slagger's pedes.

He can't hold it anymore, but he tries, clamping both servos over his mouth even as he purges again. Half-digested energon splashes through his fingers and sprays all over Darkwing's chassis, who roars in disgust and backpedals away from him. Dee crumples to his knees, gagging, both servos planted on the floor before he throws up one final time, emptying his already meager tanks and ejecting a puddle of digestive acid that burns at his throat. It dribbles out of the vents on his neck and nasal ridge, and he sobs. Primus, he feels so sick!

Darkwing's response, naturally, is to grab them both and throw them down to sublevel 50 😌 there they meet B-127, and the plot kicks off, though a bit later than before. They make it to the surface and set out to find the Matrix. The journey is significantly longer with D-16's condition, constantly having to stop so he can rest or purge. Orion, at one point, offers to carry him, and Dee is too miserable to protest. Let's Orion gently hoist him onto his back and promptly passes out with his helm on his shoulder. He's overly warm, Orion notices: feverish, surely a sign that he's getting worse. They need to find the Matrix, soon. Maybe it can help cure Dee's sickness! And if not, well, once energon flows again they won't have to mine, and D-16 will be able to see a doctor as soon as they get home. They'll get him the medicine he needs and he'll be just fine.

When they finally arrive at the Grave of the Primes, D-16 is in bad shape. Shaking like a rust rattler, dry heaving because there's nothing left in his systems to throw up, and very hot to the touch. Orion nor Elita nor B-127 have ever seen a mech in quite such a miserable state, and they're all very worried. Orion sits him down on a rock and tells him to rest, and D-16 just hunches over, helm between his knees and arms folded over his head, the epitome of misery. Whimpering softly and praying to the Primes to please, please, make it stop. Whatever this virus is that's tormenting him, please just make it stop!

Then, they find and awaken Alpha Trion.

The Prime notices Dee's condition. Immediately. He can see it, an invisible aura none but the divine can see: this young mech hosts a precious newspark inside of him. Before he tells them the story of what happened, he opts to examine the little one. He's so young, probably too young to be a carrier yet, but he's undeniably sparked. A few decacycles along.

He tells them what's going on, why D-16 is so grievously ill. "Your sparkling is starving," he tells him seriously. "You are not receiving enough donations. Their protoform is cannibalizing your body, that is the root of your sickness. Where... is the sire? He or she should be caring for your needs."

All four of them are staring at Alpha Trion with their mouths open. D-16 is carrying?! He's pregnant?! But who-

Elita one punches Orion in the face as hard as she can, sending him sprawling into the dirt with a cry of surprise. "OW! What the-"

"You slagger!" She plants one pede on his chassis and presses down til she hears metal creak and he goes 'ow ow ow!'. "It was you, I know it was you! Who else would be so dumb?! You got him sparked up and haven't been taking care of him?! You worthless deadbeat! I should rip your fragging denta out with pliers! One at a time! I should!"

"Omigosh, Dee," behind her, B-127's voice has gone airy and light in excitement. He comes up to the silver mech's side, grabbing his servo to squeeze. "Congrats, dude! You're gonna be a mom!"

D-16, for his part, is sat there in shock. Shoulders dropped and loose, mouth hanging open, staring at Alpha Trion with his optics so wide they're at liberty to pop right out of the sockets and need recalibrating. "I'm..." his voice is barely above a whisper, shaking servos drifting toward his tummy. "You mean- I'm-?!"

He's starting to smile, joy bubbling up in his chest. Excitement, too. And terror. And a million other things that he can't name because he's too shocked, but suddenly despite how sick he feels he can't help but start to laugh. Delight blooms in his chest and forces it's way out of his throat as he starts to giggle and chuckle, and before long he's doubled over holding his stomach and laughing with tears of joy streaming down his face.

"I'm- I'm having a-" he jumps up to run over to Orion, shooing Elita off of him and throwing his arms around his friend. "Pax I'm sparked! I- I can't wait to tell Sentinel, he's gonna be so excited!"

"Sentinel?" Alpha Trion's voice goes cold and harsh behind them.

"Yes! Oh- Oh yes, Sentinel Prime, he-"

"He is NO PRIME!" The old mech bellows, and all four of them turn to look at him in confusion. "He does not bear our name!"

"...WHAT?!"

The grand reveal is even more sour this time around. So, so much more sour. The betrayal runs so much deeper, and D-16 is horrified and sickened. Watching the mech he adores and admires so much bowing to the quintessons and giving away the energon that they worked so hard for. It was already bad, but now? Now, he's carrying that monster's offspring. A sparkling conceived under false pretenses, under coercion, under lies. This baby hadn't been created by love and mutual respect, it has been made by a mech that lied to their faces to get them into his bed, to get access to their bodies to use for his own pleasure however he saw fit.

D-16 feels disgusting. Violated. Worthless. He feels tricked and used and abused. He stares down at his body feeling more nausea already roiling in the deepest pits of his tanks. Sentinel had touched him everywhere. There's not a single inch of space anywhere that's clean of that mech's touch.

No one is surprised when he suddenly folds to his knees and screams. Screams with all the force of his anguish, his shattered trust, his broken and reviled body. Manic, he claws at his chassis with feverbright optics, wailing at them to, "Get it out of me...! GET IT OUT OF ME! I don't want it, I don't- I don't want it, GET IT OUT!"

Orion is at his side in an instant, yelping, "Dee, no! Stop, you'll hurt yourself!" As he forcibly grabs his friend's servos to stop him from tearing himself apart. D-16 shrieks a wordless noise of agony, and then collapses forward onto Orion to begin sobbing violently into his shoulder. Clutching onto him like a lifeline, wailing with all the devestated force he can. Bawling against Orion and falling to pieces, brokenly asking what he's going to do.

...

Ok im gonna cut this here cuz it's getting long, like really long and my hands are tired. I can barely move my left side today lmao. Poor poor Dee 😌 hope you enjoyed this nugget of angst! If ya'll wanna see a part 2, you know what to do. The box is open uwu

[tac-the-unseen]

OUAGH the last one gave me the idea of a musician reader x slasher

If I were to suggest a specific genre maybe they’re into rock because. Yeah.

Could you do something with that?

Slashers x Musician Reader

Micheal Myers:

•Plays it off but thinks it cool as hell

•He did play the piano for a very short time in his childhood, but the ward made him very rusty 

•Will happily watch any concerts you put on for him

•Will Secretly watch you if you don't 

Billy loomis & Stu macher:

•They both immediately pitch in a song request 

•They bring up the fact that you play an instrument to win arguments with people 

•Will eventually find a way to break your instrument 

•They will be very apologetic about it 

•attempts to replace it 

Thomas Hewitt:

•very interested 

•He's curious by nature, he wants to know everything he can about it 

•Your instrument is the most expensive thing in the house 

•daydreams about being able to play a song for you, one day

•until then, he'll try to figure it out himself 

Bubba Sawyer:

•Tries to sing along when you play

•he also dances but always ends up knocking stuff over

•Will sit in front of the door so her brothers can't get in while you're playing

•They constantly complain about the racket 

•Chop-top will occasionally sit in while you play 

Bo Sinclair:

•immediately shows you his acoustic 

•brags about how he can out play you

•loses miserably because he only practiced for a couple months 

•mad about it

•polishes its case whenever he comes around to it 

Vincent Sinclair:

•romanticizes it by thinking about how you're two different types of artists 

•Sketches you playing your instrument 

•Sheepishly asks you to pose

•makes a mini wax sculpture of your instrument 

•He get super giddy if you play a song for him

Lester Sinclair:

•extremely impressed 

•He's always thought of being able to play an instrument as a high class/rich person activity 

•Falls asleep while you play, Not because you're boring, But because he finds it soothing 

•will find out how to care for your instrument so he can help repair any damages it might face

Billy Lenz:

•probably was the reason He zeroed in on you in the first place 

•fines it incredibly alluring and wanted you to play all the time 

•Will find a way to get his grubby hands on your instrument 

•Will eventually break it but not feel sorry 

•(Not So) patiently waits for you to get it fixed

Brahms Heelshire:

•He can play the piano and just uses it as another excuse to hang out with you 

•looks up songs to properly make a duet with you 

•whenever conversations died down or get a little stale, he whips out the instrument card 

•whether you did or didn't know how to play an instrument he's going to romanticize it anyway 

Hannibal Lecter:

•insists on making some kind of duet with you, and whether or not your instruments align with each other 

•buy stuff to make for your instrument is a mint condition 

•’humbly’ braggs about your talent at his dinner parties 

•Will make you food associated with your instrument(s) (look that up, it's a real thing because of course it is)

Will Graham:

•Like to watch you play whatever it is you play

•He's never really had any interest in instruments, But he starts listening to videos featuring your instrument. 

•Casually asks Hannibal facts about your instrument 

•makes you a little charm related to your instrument to put on your keychain 

•Has flashbacks to the guy with his throat turned into a Cello 

The Lost Boys:

•They all at some point have picked up an instrument 

•David can play the Piano, Organ, violin, and guitar

•Dwayne can play the Hand drums, flute, and Bass guitar

•Paul can play the clarinet, electric guitar, French horn, and marimba 

•Marko can play the Drums, Harp, Cello, and viola

•They have all genuinely considered starting a band 

•No matter what you play, you'll fit in

Thanks for reading <3

I went for a more neutral tone with this fic. Because I don't want to write 16 other fanfics about specific music genres ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠🎀)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

[habken]

What's the personality difference for Katzuku in the trenchcoat au vs the villain accident au? Like I'd assume that he'd be less angry in the trenchcoat au since there was no huge build up of emotions

yeah less angry overall and the two parts of him actually get along right off the bat so there's less of an internal clash, and he's also more.. innocent? For lack of a better word.

He's 16 but has the lived experience of two 8 year olds lol so there's things he doesn't know about and social situations he doesn't fully get at first. For example, he probably hasn't seen some of the shows that his new class enjoy cause they weren't really targeted towards younger kids. Also he's probably not fully aware of the way regular teens talk to each other. Stuff like that, that he'll eventually get the hang of, but makes him more awkward compared to the quirk accident version at the start

[trailerprk-princess]

♰⋮ adrenaline rush | rafe cameron x fem!maybank!reader

!!!: my work is not to be reused without credit/permission!

request rulesᯓ𖤐

warnings: drug use & underage drinking. 16+. word count: 1.83k summary: reader finds that her summer is rather boring compared to her brothers. rafe is there to fix that. authors note: i have so many ideas for maybank!reader! might have to make a section on the masterlist specifically for that

“How has your summer been?” Your coworker, Ameilia asks you as you handwash the dishes in the sink. You are apart of the kitchen crew at the country club as Ameilia got to be a hostess. You were jealous of her because she had a job that you wanted. It was not fair that they hid you in the back of the building with little to no interactions each day while Ameilia got to go out and be social.

“It has been decent,” you lie. Truthfully, you could not have hated the summer more. It was hard to enjoy it when your brother, JJ got to do all the fun stuff. He gets to go out and have adventures with his friends while you had to work. It has been incredibly boring.

You were not going to ask Ameilia the same question. You do not think that you can handle hearing about someone else's summer without having an emotional breakdown. She just smiled at you and walked off with a small tub filled with cleaned and dressed silverware. All your built up jealousy has turned you into a bit of a grump. You try not to complain or show it too much, but you were about to reach your limit.

You clock out of your shift thirty minutes early because the day has been weighing on you from working a double shift and all you wanted to do was go home. You walk out of the building through the back door. The sun has already set giving the back of the building an eerie look as the only source of light is from the light posts from above. The troubling vibe made you shove your hand deep into the front pocket of your slacks to grip your pepper spray.

You walk out towards the road to find a boy, about your age, maybe a little older leaned up against a tree by the side of the road with a lit joint in his mouth. You walk past him still gripping onto the pepper spray in your pocket.

“Hey, Maybank!” He calls. You turn around to face him, not sure who he is. “You’re Maybanks sister, right?”

“Yeah…” You answer, still trying to remember from where you have seen him before. “I’m sorry, who are you again?”

The boy almost looked embarrassed and he furrowed his eyebrows together as if you offended him. “It’s Rafe. Rafe Cameron,” he tells you. Which makes everything click together in your head. “Oh, right! Sarah's older brother.”

He nods his head, “I’m also known for that.”

“Sorry about your friend,” you apologize. “I heard JJ put a gun to his head.”

“Are you willing to testify that?” He jokes as he puts the joint back to his mouth. You shake your head, “No.”

“Is your friend okay?” You ask. “Oh, Topper! Yeah, yeah, he’s fine.” Rafe says cooly.

“Thats good to hear! I think I am going to head home now,” you say as you jab your thumb to point to the road behind you. You turn on your heels and face the other way to start walking down the dimly lit street.

“Maybank!” Rafe calls for you one more time. You stop walking and turn around to face towards Rafe. He flicks the joint to the ground and steps away from the tree. “I’m going to a party tonight. Would ya like to come?” He invites you.

“I’m not really a big party person,” you admit. Honestly, the last thing you wanted to do tonight was party after a long day of working. “Okay… You can come to my place.”

You contemplate on the thought for a moment. “Sure,” you hesitate. And walk towards to where he is standing. “My car is this way,” he says as he places a firm hand on your lower back and leads you to the parking lot. You release the pepper spray and take your hand out of your pocket. If anything bad was going to happen, it was not going to happen here.

You consider that you might have been stupid for letting a strange boy that you did not even know take you to his place. Probably because he wanted to get into bed with you. He could be trying to kill you. But in the moment, it did not seem to matter. This is the summer fun that you have been waiting for that has been dropped off like a package at your front door. You were not about to give it up.

He leads you to his car. You did not know the make or model. JJ would have known, he was the car person in the family, along with your dad. It was a pretty silver color and you could tell that it was expensive just from looking at the exterior. Rafe leaves your side to go to the drivers door and unlocks the car. You get into the car and sit on the leather seats.

Rafe presses the start button on the car and leaves the parking lot. “I didn’t get your name,” he says. You smile and tell him, “It’s Y/N.”

“That’s a beautiful name,” he flirts causing you to smile wider. You never gotten much male attention in your life. Mostly because you did not want or seek it since the male role models in your life is your dad and JJ. And them alone is enough for you to swear off any man who tries to date you.

“You’re a lot quieter than your brother, y’know.” Rafe tells you. You shake your head, “I get told that a lot. Think it is because I am used to him getting all of the attention.”

“Pretty girl like you? I’d think you get a lot of attention.” Rafe confesses causing you to shake your head. “No, I really don’t.”

“Not even at work?” Rafe asks. “Nope, not even work. I actually get stuck back in the kitchen doing dishes. They don’t like putting the pogues in the front to be waitresses or hostesses. Ameilia does, she gets everything she wants.” You tell him with envy radiating off your voice.

“That’s stupid.” Rafe scoffs as he rolls his eyes. “You’re prettier than Ameilia. If you were a waitress, I would be there everyday. I doubt I’d be the only one who would be there to see you too.” He flatters, causing you to smile at him. “Thank you,” you say almost at a whisper.

Rafe pulls up into the drive of his house and you get out of his car along with him. He starts to walk towards the front door. You stay still in awe of the house. “Are you okay?” He asks you as you stand frozen in the drive. “Yeah, I just never been in a house so big before,” you confess.

“C’mon,” he says jerking his arm towards the door. You nod and walk with him through the front door and into the house. “Do you drink?” He asks as you follow him into the kitchen.

“Socially,” you lie. You have never drank alcohol before because you were always turned away from drinking. Mostly because of your dad. “Good,” he says as he leans into the fridge grabbing two glass bottles of beer. He twists the caps off of the beers and hands you one while keeping the other one for himself.

“Follow me,” he commands and leads you to the tall staircase that spirals upwards. You follow him to the top of the stairs and into his room. He opens his bedroom window and climbs out of it and onto the roof. You go to window and he helps you out and has you sit down by him on the rough shingles.

“How has your summer been?” You ask him trying to make conversation. “It’s been pretty lame.” He tells you as he takes a drink from his beer. “What makes you say that?”

“Got nothin’ going on,” he shrugs. “How has summer been treatin’ you?” He asks.

“Just like yours, pretty lame,” you laugh. “Oh, c’mon! Girl like you, you must be havin’ some type of fun.” He laughs and nudges his elbow into your side.

“Not really. Been working a lot. And I have been covering JJ’s shifts because he’s not showing up to work no more… He’s been too busy hanging out and having fun with his friends.” You explain to him.

“What is he doin’ with his friends that you can’t do?” He asks. “I guess, I’m jealous of all of the fun he is having.” You say playing with the bottle of beer in your hands. You take a sip of it, noticeably cringing at the taste. Trying to hold yourself back from getting into a coughing fit or embarrassing yourself by throwing up on the cute boys roof.

Rafe watches your face and lightly smirks. “You never drank before, have you?” You shake your and say, “No.”

“That’s okay,” he says, taking the bottle away from your hand. He sets the bottle beside him alongside his beer before standing up. “What are you doing?” You ask as he throws his gray snapback aside on the roof.

“Having fun,” he says before he lifts his shirt above his head. He reaches his hand down to you for you to grab and lifts you up to your feet. “What are we doing?” You ask. He looks over the ledge of the roof and down to the pool below. “Jumping,” he smiles.

You look down at the pool and you feel a sense of fear over take your body. “This could seriously injure us. What if we hit the concrete? We are going to break a leg,” you nervously ramble.

“Wow, you’re so much fun,” Rafe mumbles under his breath. You roll your eyes and take off your black head band and strip to your bra and underwear. “I can’t believe I’m about to do this,” you gripe as you backed away from the ledge. As stupid as it is, you took the chance and ran off of the roof and jumped into the pool.

You swim up to the surface to see Rafe looking down from you. “I can’t believe you did it, Pogue!” He exclaims with a laugh. You shake your head in annoyance. “You going to jump?” You shout at him. He smiles and walks backwards disappearing behind the roof before he runs and jumps into the pool with you. You watch him swim to the surface and you give him a small applause which causes him to bow.

“Nice jump,” you compliment. He smiles and swims up to you. “Wanna do it again?” He asks and your eyes widen. “Oh, please, no.”

“It was a good adrenaline rush, though.” You confess. “Yeah, it was, wasn’t it?” He says as he inches closer to your face. “But not as good of a rush as this,” he smirks, pulling you in by the waist to kiss you.

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[angstywaifu]

Black Dahlia - 16. Mares In His Stable

With Threshing over for another year, it's time for everyone to celebrate.

Set Pre Fourth Wing/Books

Garrick Tavis x OC (Dahlia Aetos)

Black Dahlia Masterlist | Masterlist

The dining hall is loud as everyone celebrates. Well those of us now classified as riders celebrate. As I scan the room, those who did not manage to bond a dragon today are absent. And I don’t blame them. This was essentially rubbing in their face that they weren’t worthy of being a rider.

As my eyes continue to scan the room I note how many of us new riders had forgone our jackets, many showing off their new relics. I was one of the few who had not opted to show off my new relic. Especially not while my brother was around.

When we’d been gifted our dragon relics in the flight field, I had to fight back a smirk as the heat that engulfed me wrapped around my right arm. The blue and black relic wrapping around my arm and shoulder. Reminding me very much of the relics the marked ones bared. I’d angered my father enough for one day, so I’d decided to keep it hidden for another time My brother no doubt delivering the news himself once he saw the marking for himself. As if sensing my gaze Dain turns, our eyes meeting across the room.

“I can’t tell if he wants to kill you or fuck you with how he’s staring at you right now,” Imogen says loudly as she takes the empty seat across from me.

I choke on the drink I’d been taking, Bodhi quick to start thumping me on the back to help the coughing fit I’m caught in by Imogen’s words as I tear my gaze from Dain’s.

”P-please tell me you are not talking about my brother.” I say once my coughing fit has passed, the rest of our group bursting into laughter at my words as I gasp for air.

Imogen smirks and shakes her head while laughing at me, “Fuck no. Though if incest is your thing-”

”Fuck no. Now please tell me who the hell you’re talking about.”

Bodhi turns his head, scanning the room as we wait for Imogen to reply. He must find the person in question, the corners of his mouth lifting in a smirk that reminds me too much of his older cousin. “Definitely the second one,” He teases as Imogen nods in agreement.

I turn my head as I follow Bodhi’s gaze, my eyes landing on Garrick as he leans up against a wall on the other side of the room. Our eyes lock for a brief second before he averts his gaze to another rider who starts walking up to him. The way she sways her hips as she walks up to me tells me exactly what she wants. As she steps into his reach, he grasps her by the waist and pulls her against him before leaning down and pulling her into a kiss. A kiss that quickly turns heated, and there's no doubt in my mind at what those two will be doing tonight.

”Hate to burst your bubble, but looks like you’re wrong Bodhi,” I say as I pat him on the back sympathetically. “Looks like he just wants to murder me and the feeling is mutual.”

”He’s really not-”

”I swear to the gods if you say he’s really not that bad I will pour this entire drink over your head.” I warn him, holding my drink above his head.

Bodhi looks between me and the drink, debating if to finish his sentence. After a few seconds his shoulders sagas he sighs in defeat. Clearly deciding it was not worth having a drink poured over his head for.

”Do I want to know why you’re holding a drink over my cousins head like that?” Xaden drawls from next to me, his voice startling me causing the drink to slosh over the edge of the cup and a few drops landing on Bodhi’s head.

”Your cousin thought it would be a good idea to try tell her Garrick isn’t that bad.” Austin chimes in.

I turn and narrow my gaze at her, and all she does is smile sweetly at me. She was no longer affected by any glares I sent her way. Always seeing past them now she knew me too well. I hear her giggle as I roll my eyes and turn my attention back to Xaden.

”Which I might believe if he didn’t act like I was the worse thing to happen in his life.” I say venomously, earning a few chuckles from our group.

”At the risk of getting a drink poured over my own head. He might surprise you Aetos.” He drawls, my eyes narrowing as he uses my last name.

”I highly doubt that given how he’s treated me so far.” I snap back, Xaden’s brow furrowing at my words. “And on that note I will see you all tomorrow as I’ve had enough of this Garrick talk.”

After months of sleeping in the crowded barracks, I’d had the best nights sleep since I’d gotten here. It felt weird to have my own space again, no Austin and Liz to talk with before bed. But I had missed my alone time. Missed having my own space. Though somehow I knew with having my own room now, I still wouldn’t get as much alone time as I would like. I could already imagine Bodhi knocking on my door and barging in whenever he got the chance. I was going to have to learn to ward my door as soon as I could, even if it wasn’t something I would learn for a while, I would find a way.

I grab my jacket from the back of the chair where I had thrown it last night before walking into the hallway and closing the door. I hear the sound of a door opening behind me, and I turn to see Garrick walking out of the room across from mine. He goes to walk off, but as I lean against the doorway and cross my arms cross my chest, his head turns to look at me as he stops.

For the first time since I’d gotten here, he doesn't glare at me when our eyes meet. And I hated to say it was a nice change to not see his face in a glare at the sight of me. His gaze travels over me before snagging on the relic that now adorned my arm and was on full display due to not putting my jacket on yet. His eyes go wide as he takes it in, clearly having the same thoughts I did when I’d looked at it after Threshing.

”For someone that hates me so much, you sure seem to like starting at me. Maybe I should paint you a picture.” My words snapping him out of whatever trance he was in, his hazel eyes meeting mine again.

”Thanks, but I politely decline that offer.” He huffs at me, folding his own arms over his chest.

”You, do something politely? That would be a first.” I snap back as I smirk at him, his brow furrowing slightly, but not into its usual glare.

”I can do many things politely.” He says with a smirk, slowly walking over to me. “Maybe if you didn’t act they way you do, you might get some of the benefits like your fellow rider did last night.”

My laughter echoes off the walls of the empty hall, Garrick’s smirk dropping at my reaction as he stops in front of me, having to crane my neck to look up at him. “If there was anyone I want to reap those benefits from, you would be the last one on my list. Don’t want to catch a disease from one of the many mares you keep in your stable on rotation.”

I expected his usual glare to return, but it doesn’t. The lumbering oaf just smirks down at me as he leans closer. My heart rate picks up at the close proximity, a slight heat rising up my neck. Shit. I was not reacting to this bastard.

”Oh don’t worry little Aetos, I keep the mares in my stable quite clean if you ever change your mind.” His voice dropping to an octave which does not help the way my body was reacting. I might find him attractive, but that was it.

I open my mouth to reply before a door bangs open next to us, Bodhi bounding out into the hallway before coming to a halt as he notices Garrick and I. Garrick is quick to respond, turning my head to watch as he storms out of the hallway towards the stairs. A chuckle draws my attention back to Bodhi, still standing where he had halted in the hallway with a wide grin on his face.

”Not a fucking word. I do not want to hear it.” I snap at him before shrugging my jacket on and storming off.

”I wasn’t going to say anything!”

@imtoanonymousforyou @simplyme-fornow @omalmal @lalaluch @wolfbc97 @leptitlu @fullmoon-94 @the-fandom-ness @fan-of-many-bands

[angel---eater]

Thinking about this passage from page 4489, and wondering if splintering Hal actually changed Dirk's persona. Not personality, something deeper than that. I have no idea how to describe this to singlets, but... the difference between 1 alter who was a fused combination of 2, and then that 1 splitting into 2 again. Combined, they're 3 distinct people, with 1 being a brand new person made up of 2. I dunno, think about the 2^sprites for a good and startlingly similar example. Probably should've just started with that instead of attempting to explain plural math, lol.

Mainly I'm wondering about this because there are, at first glance, subtle but also sometimes startlingly distinct differences between Dirk and Hal throughout HS1. Obvious caveats being that a shit ton of change and development can happen to a teenager between the ages of 13-16, Hal is in an incomprehensible situation of duress, and Dirk is also under a lot of pressure that he put on his own shoulders. But I can't put this thought down. Hal is distinct. His speech patterns are different, he uses different words, he has a different sense of humour. He jokes around more often, for one. He uses more puns. He focuses and worries about different things. Mr Paprika Prick is Homestuck's plural poster boy, after all. I'm becoming more and more convinced that Hal was in there the whole time, and that - along with dealing with impossible loneliness - something else was compelling them to code up the AR. A tragically failed attempt at giving an alter life outside a shared brain.

'I am more like him.' is a massive overcompensation, probably also hangover urges from Dirk's backbrain to hide his plurality from him, because that's like... the main symptom of DID. Amnesia and denial. You won't know what you're not ready to. Dirk is scared of the AR because if he faces the fact that Hal is a distinct person from him, it means there was something deeply, deeply wrong. And he's not ready for that.

[the-violet-galaxy]

Moon in the Killswap AU, to go along with Sun! This Swap AU explores TSAMS if Sun had been the one with the killcode – and by extension, Moon is the one Eclipse manifests inside of.

The twins’ backstory is almost the same as canon. Moon was born with no control over the body, and was angry and lashed out at Sun for this (and was an asshole to pretty much everyone else when he did have control.)  Sun was afraid of him, but still tried to reach out. They came to an understanding, became brothers, and found a way to separate.

Where the backstory differed is with Sun. His killcode was like a switch that activated when he was pushed to a limit, reacting to abuse, mistreatment, the breaking of rules. Moon’s abuse was one of the things that could trigger Sun’s killcode, which emotionally destroyed Sun every time he came back to himself to find someone dead by his hands; during these early years, Moon was so bitter about his circumstances that he sometimes egged Sun on and mocked him for his efforts to not kill people.

But eventually, he knew Sun was not to blame, and wanted to change for the better. He wanted to help Sun suppress his Killcode. So, he separated them, so they could start a new chapter in their lives.

But Sun considered himself too weak to ever fully control his killcode – so while they were in the process of separating, he secretly snuck it through the datastream into Moon’s head, who he thought would never be affected by it.

And Eclipse manifested inside of Moon, who was “Sun” trapped alone within the mind of his abuser…

And a year later Eclipse shows up and begins his crusade to ruin the brothers’ lives and to find the Star to bring order to the world! While inside Moon, he starts amplifying Moon’s faults. He eggs on his abusive behavior towards Sun, his assholish behavior to others, and, one of Moon’s biggest struggles: his controlling nature.

Because these are all faults that Moon has, and Eclipse shines an especially strong light on them. This causes tension between the brothers as they try to figure out what to do, when Eclipse keeps hijacking Moon’s body in search of that Star.

(Especially when Sun’s killcode starts regenerating, and as with before, when Moon is abusive towards Sun, that is one of the big triggers to make the killcode’s influence stronger and stronger until Killcode as a sapient entity is strong enough to be born. For Sun’s arc, the killcode is like a metaphor for “taking revenge and hurting the people who hurt you back,” which Sun desperately wants to fight against.)

And so, one of the big parts of the AU is Moon having to learn to be a better person – to keep changing for the better -- to unlearn his abusive patterns. That will be the key.  

Because one thing’s for sure: Sun is the most important person in Moon’s world. Even during the times when he hurts him, he still loves him more than anything. He vows he WILL protect Sun (and the rest of his family that come later), he will keep Eclipse from the Star so he can’t use it to kill them, he will save Sun when Solar is implanted in his head (and later, protect Solar when he is their brother), he will find a way to remove Sun’s killcode when it regenerates and becomes sentient.

(But it won’t be that easy. And, well, when things keep NOT going his way, Moon might end up with a very unhappy arc that ends in disastrous consequences the way it did for Sun when Sun killed Bloodmoon…)   

And that’s an overview for Moon!

Some other notes:

Moon has very little knowledge of Magig. Sun is the master magic user.

Moon is the one who suffered July 16 because of the Blacksun Burn Twins, and boy is he mad at them.

Roxanne replaces Monty and is Sun’s close friend. Whether there is a crush or not, Moon still teases Sun about having a crush on Roxanne.

It’ll be fun to write how Moon interacts differently with Solar and Killcode when they control Sun’s body. (He first realizes Solar is in there when Solar isn’t good at acting happy and jittery like Sun.) (But he haaaaates Killcode’s guts sososo much you guys.)

(It will also shine a light on Killswap Moon’s difference between Old Moon and New Moon from TSAMS canon.)  

That’s him! I should probably draw Eclipse next!

[fionaapplerocks]

The Long and Winding Road That Leads to Fiona Apple

By Tyler Coates 2012-05-31

“The past is never dead. It’s not even past.” So goes the oft-quoted line from William Faulkner’s Requiem for a Nun. Time is circular, and our relationship with our own personal histories is ever changing. This is a concept with which the enigmatic Fiona Apple is deeply familiar.

The 34-year-old singer-songwriter is about to release her fourth album—the first in seven years—aptly titled The Idler Wheel is wiser than the Driver of the Screw, and Whipping Cords will serve you more than Ropes will ever do. The spinning wheel of time cranks back and forth for Apple, who continues to re-examine her past while trying to keep up with the present. Like most artists, however, Apple finds that her fans cherish the past more than she does.

In 2000, a 16-year-old fan named Bill Magee approached Apple after a show in Upper Darby, Pennsylvania with a request: he told her he was a member of his high school’s gay-straight alliance and hoped that Apple could write a few words of support. “[I] was much more interested in interacting with a celebrity than building an alliance between gays and straights,” he admitted on his blog 12 years later where he posted a scanned image of the letter he received less than a week after requesting her response.

Apple wrote: “All I know is I want my friends to be good people, and when my friends fall in love, I want them to fall in love with other good people. How can you go wrong with two people in love? If a good boy loves a good girl, good. If a good boy loves another good boy, good. And if a good girl loves the goodness in good boys and good girls, then all you have is more goodness, and goodness has nothing to do with sexual orientation.”

“My brother was the one who told me about it,” Apple tells me just weeks after Magee posted the letter on his Tumblr, which was then picked up by various sites like Jezebel and Pitchfork. “I was like, ‘A letter I wrote to someone when I was 22 has made its way online?’ That’s the scariest thing I could possibly hear in my life. And the subject matter was so important—I know how I’ve always felt so I knew it wasn’t going to be a bad letter, but I was like, ‘What did I say?!’”

The letter’s sudden popularity online is indicative of how much has changed since Apple released her debut album, Tidal, in 1996.

For starters, she was then a 19-year-old singer-songwriter signed to a major record label and churning out emotional and dark odes at a time when her contemporaries were singing bubblegum-pop love songs.

She made headlines after appearing in the video for “Criminal.” Shot in a seedy apartment, the video featured a scantily clad and emaciated Apple, sparking criticisms of the exploitive quality of the images (and suggesting that she had an eating disorder). In 1997, when accepting her award for Best New Artist at the MTV Video Music Awards, Apple infamously shouted into the microphone, “This world is bullshit, and you shouldn’t model your life on what we think is cool, and what we’re wearing and what we’re saying.”

While the speech was replayed and parodied on TV for years following, Apple was lucky enough to have said those words before the days of blogging and YouTube; had she given the speech 15 years later, it may have turned into a career-damaging viral video and sparked a few thousand snarky tweets.

She also has the luxury of being a successful artist who doesn’t need to promote herself online. “They want me to tweet now, but I don’t,” Apple tells me of her label reps. “It doesn’t feel natural to me. But I do find it actually more interesting to see people posting ridiculously mundane shit. I like to hear about what people had for breakfast or what they did all day. It’s interesting because I don’t know how other people live.”

While Apple is hardly a recluse, she’s made few public appearances in the seven years since the release of her third album, Extraordinary Machine. The excitement following the announcement by Epic Records of the late-June release of The Idler Wheel speaks to the loyalty of her fan base. (And as for that long-winded title, it’s a callback to the much-maligned 90-word title of her acclaimed sophomore effort, universally shortened to When the Pawn…)

The Idler Wheel does not deviate from the familiar sounds of Apple’s earlier records; the songs are still layered with complex instrumentation, and her reverberant voice still takes center stage in each tune.

The album was produced nearly in secret over the last few years—a surprising move from an established artist with the resources of a major label at her disposal. But Apple explains that her experience with the label system is what allowed her to feel free to work on her own. “It was very casual, and I wasn’t fully admitting that I was making an album,” she says. “I got to use the time in the studio to inspire me to finish other things rather than feel like I was finishing homework to hand in. It wasn’t a lot of pressure. And the record company didn’t know I was doing it, so nobody was looking over my shoulder.”

Most might take that mentality as a reaction to the restrictions of her record label, especially after the drama surrounding the release of Extraordinary Machine. After collaborating with Jon Brion (who produced When the Pawn) to create an early version of the third album in 2002, Apple then decided to rework all but two of the songs with producer Mike Elizondo.

The original version of the album leaked online, and Brion suggested in interviews that Apple’s label had rejected the demo and forced her to rerecord the songs (a claim that Apple later denied). Still, it incited an uproar among her fans. An online-based movement called Free Fiona organized demonstrations outside of the Sony headquarters in New York, and protestors sent apples to the label’s executives.

The final version of the album was released in 2005 and received positive reviews and earned Apple a Grammy nomination. “I ran into the guy who started Free Fiona after a show in Chicago,” she tells me. “He apologized to me! They didn’t get the story quite right, but they did help me get my album out. I felt so bad that he had spent all this time thinking I was pissed at him—I had a physical urge to get down on the floor and kiss his shoes!”

It’s an intense reaction (she admits she didn’t bow to her fan because “it would be weird if I did that”), but Apple is still a very intense person. Dressed in a flowing skirt paired with several layers of spaghetti-strapped tank tops that reveal her slender frame (which seems healthier than in her early days, giving the impression that she must spend most of her downtime on a yoga mat), Apple fidgets in her seat during our conversation, often giving off an infectious giggle.

But she is surprisingly comfortable to talk to, not much like the somber young woman who sang of heartbreak and disappointment. “I don’t think I’ll ever have an idea of what I look like to the rest of the world,” she replies when I ask if she ever worries that her lyrics, which are sometimes in stark contrast to the up-tempo, progressive sounds of her songs’ instrumentations, give off the wrong impression of her personality. “It’s all your own perception. I could easily be concerned with how I’m taken and then have all the good stuff filtered through to me and choose to believe that. For the rest of my life it’d be the truth for me, but not the whole truth.”

Born Fiona Apple McAfee Maggart in New York City to Brandon Maggart and Diane McAfee, Apple’s musical destiny was settled at birth. The McAfee-Maggarts are, while not reaching Barrymore-level name recognition, an entertainment family; Apple’s father was nominated for a Tony for his performance in the Broadway musical Applause, both her mother and sister are singers, and her half-brothers work in the film industry—one an actor and the other a director.

She’s a third-generation performer, as her grandmother was a dancer in musical revues and her grandfather a Big Band-era musician. While Apple’s auspicious introduction to the pop world had critics calling her a prodigy, she crafted her early songs as a cathartic necessity. (“Sullen Girl” from Tidal, in particular, is about her rape at the age of 12.) “Over the years it’s transferred more into a craft,” she says. “I use myself as material because that’s what I’ve got. But these days I write less than half of my songs to get myself through things. I have to find other things to be meaningful— otherwise I’d just be miserable all the time.”

Her songs are still extremely autobiographical, which is perhaps their charm. Following in the footsteps of other singer-songwriters, especially women who emerged in the early ’90s and expressed their emotions in particularly vulnerable ways, Apple’s openness has always had an empowering appeal. Her songs seem to suggest that feeling a variety of emotions—sadness, glee, despair, insanity—is not only normal, but, like those self-reflective musicians before her, she also gives permission to her listeners to feel the same way.

Even for Apple, her older songs are relics of another time, and she now makes them applicable to her life in the present. “They all kind of become poems after a while,” she says. “You can take your own meaning out of them. It’s been a very long time [since my first albums], and I can apply those songs to other situations that are more current in my life.” She admits she has changed greatly since she started writing songs in her late teenage years, especially when it comes to how she portrays herself. “I don’t feel comfortable singing the songs that I wrote. I used to blame other people and not take responsibility. I thought I was a total victim trying to look strong.”

And she is much harder on herself in the songs on The Idler Wheel than she ever was before. Sure, she admitted to being “careless with a delicate man” in “Criminal,” arguably her most famous song, and in When the Pawn’s “Mistake” she sang, “Do I wanna do right, of course but / Do I really wanna feel I’m forced to / Answer you, hell no.”

On The Idler Wheel, Apple examines her own solitude and neuroses as well as their effect on her relationships with others. “I can love the same man, in the same bed, in the same city,” she sings on “Left Alone,” “But not in the same room, it’s a pity.” On “Jonathan,” a somber love song layered with robotic, mechanical sounds that’s presumably about her ex-boyfriend, author and Bored to Death creator Jonathan Ames, she urges, “Don’t make me explain / Just tolerate my little fist / Tugging at your forest-chest / I don’t want to talk about anything.”

But performing, as a central requirement of her career, still takes precedence. “Some nights I’m very, very nervous, and some nights I’m not at all,” she tells me. “I think, ‘This is ridiculous. I’m not a person who does a show, I’m a person who should be on a couch watching TV.’ But then it’s like I get knocked into another state of consciousness, and then I’m left behind, and the person that’s doing the show is there and there’s nothing else in the world existing other than the note she’s singing. It’s such a joy to do, but I forget about it until I’m on the stage.”

Apple has lived in los Angeles since Tidal’s release in 1996, although she admits that she’s “not an L.A. girl.” “I was supposed to stay in New York,” she tells me. “I remember being 17 and asking if I could record in New York. How did I end up here? It’s 15 years later… How did that happen?” Apple doesn’t seem to process time like other people. When I ask when she began recording The Idler Wheel and when she knew it was ready, she has a complicated answer. “It must have started in 2008. Or 2009. I don’t know! I have no idea. It’s weird to think that there was 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011.” Her big blue eyes suddenly look to her right as she furrows her brow. “Where’ve I been? What was I doing? What was that year about?”

Maybe the solitary nature of living in L.A. contributes to her aloof tendencies. “I’m not a social creature,” she says, “I don’t go to parties all the time because I’d probably just wonder why I’m there in the first place.” Her preference for being alone may also stem from the kind of personal criticisms that people tend to throw at female musicians. “I’ve gotten so used to being misunderstood. Nobody’s ever really said anything bad about my music, but when I’ve had albums come out there are always people making fun of me. ‘Oh, she’s back?’” She didn’t even expect the comments (mostly online) when the full title of The Idler Wheel was announced. “I didn’t stop to think that anyone would call it ridiculous, but people did. I thought, ‘Ahhh. My old friends.’ I’m not sure what’s ridiculous about it, but that’s what they’ve got to say.”

I cautiously mention the infamous acceptance speech from the VMAs, a moment early in her career that defined the public persona of Fiona Apple as an angry, ungracious woman. “I’ve never been ashamed of that,” she replies immediately. It was the first moment, she says, in which she felt like she could speak up—to break free from the shyness that defined her childhood and early teenage years. “I genuinely, naïvely thought that I was going to put out a record and that was going to make me have friends. I expected to give it to people and they would understand me; no one would say to me, ‘We don’t want to be your friend because you’re too intense or too sad all the time.’” It wasn’t necessarily the case.

“Do you still think the world is bullshit?” I ask when we talk about the VMAs. She laughs. “It’s not the world!” she exclaims. “Of course people think that ‘the world’ is the whole world. I felt that I had finally gotten into the popular crowd, and I thought, ‘Is this what I’ve been doing this for?’ I felt like I was back in the cafeteria in high school and still couldn’t speak up for myself.”

These days, Apple spends more time focusing on her own art rather than the reactions to it. With age has come calm and decreasing desire to pay attention to her detractors. “I’ve decided it takes too much energy to try to avoid it,” she tells me, brushing aside her freshly dyed crimson hair. “I’m not going to hide from the world.”

Source Archive.org:

https://web.archive.org/web/20120603033544/http://www.blackbookmag.com/music/the-long-and-winding-road-that-leads-to-fiona-apple-1.49114

[hstayafanart]

Farmtale Sans! Not totally happy with him but I've been poking at him all week and I'm over it haha

I was aiming for a chubby farm cat. I was trying to make him a warmer brown but I just couldn't get it looking good. I considered ginger but I don't think Crop has ginger cat energy haha

Click here for all my UTMV kitty designs!

Sorry I haven't been posting much, I cannot begin to tell you how busy this course is keeping me. Still working on the fic as well, about a third of the way through my initial draft (I can't really call it a 'first' draft: I go through and edit the other chapters before writing new ones).

TMI - discussion of medical issues below

(bittersweet!) Personal Update

I must admit I'm falling out of the fandom a little - partly because I've been working on a personal project. I'm definitely finishing the fic - and I may keep drawing kitties/adding to the Down Under AU, but I think I'll be taking a break after this last story is done. Writing got me through one of the hardest points in my life, and I think part of the reason I'm ready to finish things up is because my life is so vastly improved.

107 days sober from skin picking, anxiety attacks are way less common and less severe when they do happen, I've halved my anxiety meds, and I've finally found something I truly love doing in bush regeneraton.

On top of that, after 11 years of trying to get doctors to believe my crippling period pain and suicidal depression during PMS, I've finally found a gyno willing to give me a hysterectomy. I've wanted this since I was 16. Having your pain believed makes such a difference.

My ulna nerve pain is under control, my mental health is under control - things are going so well I feel like I'm dreaming.

Fanfic things:

The final excuse reason the final story is taking so long to draft is because I want to wrap things up in a satisfying way. I want to give them a happy ending, but there's a lot of relationship issues between different parties to iron out first. There's a bit more focus on Ink & Error in this one, and a little on Nightmare's issues with other Outcodes too (I'm less interested in his relationship with Dream - I don't feel I have anything to add to a fandom gloriously saturated in them).

And! A bit more on Killer, too. A lot of fandom interpretations of him have him feeling, but I'm trying to stick a little closer to canon, as fun as those readings of him are. Working out the emotions of a monster incapable of feeling without having a complete breakdown is fun. :)

[tired-ophidian]

could we maybe hear some more stuff on the poolverine! fankid Felix??? (I rlly like the look of them aaaaaaaa 🥰)

oml sorry it took this long 😭 exams are finally over thankfully so I'm free at last! Time to info dump >:]

So, Felix aka Taz is a silly goose; basically a mini, blond Wolverine if he's extra feral with a personality similar to DP. An anarchist who uses he/they pronouns, has no label when it comes to sexuality, and is very attached to his parents. He's a feral lil' shit who can charm his way into your heart before your know it and you can't help but love him for that.

He's currently between the ages 15 and 16 in my head (to make things fun) with mutant powers inherited mostly from Logan, and the youngest poolverine kid. Like Gabby, he has one claw per hand and they protrude from their wrists instead of knuckles! Oh, and emphasis on the fact that they have hella sharp fangs too. He can and will bite.

They love dancing, cooking, and traveling the most. And wouldn't you know it, they somehow found a part-time job at the TVA as a bounty hunter because of course they did. Do their parents know? HAHA no. This kid's running around chasing targets throughout the multiverse without adult supervision, thank Marvel Jesus for the healing factor.

If they're not out and about, Taz loves to hang out with his friends Jesse Spector (MK fankid) and Ainsley Agner (spidersona), read some books, watch something online, or get some quality time of family bonding! He's big on cuddles, hugs, and head pats—legit—but only if they like you or you interest them. Stranger danger, no touchie!

Before you ask. Yes. He purrs.

Taz is also a major fashionista with a knack for anything glam and make-up. One day you'll see him wearing skater boy and baggy streetwear, and the next he'll be rocking dresses and crop tops. Their sense of style changes just as quickly as their emotions. One thing he's consistent at is being inconsistent. Like a Russian roulette, you'll never know what you're gonna get.

I imagine him as being a mix of Junko (from Danganronpa), Dazai (from Bungo Stray Dogs), Yuuji (from JJK) and Giorno (from JJBA). All their best and worst aspects molded into one being.

Aaand... that's it for now!

I'll leave his existence (how he came to be) up for personal interpretation ;]

Thanks for the wait pooks! Feel free to ask more questions about this munchkin, I highly appreciate them <333

[circusislife]

1. what is your music taste

2. do u happen to know your MBTI

*unhinged chuckle intensifies* misic taste?!?! The only thing even remotely similar to recognizable music taste is the fact that I like celtic women! When it comes to anything else it's either a song from a show I like, a cover on the music of a gamme I like, or something I stumbled upon completely on accident and just decided to take home with me like a lost kitten that then proceeds to take permanent residence in my house! 🤣🤣🤣

Uhhhhh..... i think I've heard of MBTI? No, i'm sure I've heard of them. I just have no idea of what or where¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Look, there's a permanently ongoing music (playful) feud in my house. Om mom's side, melomaniacs. my sister mother aunt and i have names taken from operas and my sister had learned the lyrics of verdi's "va pensiero" when she was freaking three!!!. On dad's side, soft 60' or 80' rock, mostly italian.

Anything else I stumbled upon while exploring on the internet¯\_(ツ)_/¯

And I cannot remember a song's autor to save my life '^^

[bloomfish]

It's so weird that in angel s5e2 they do a little flashback to Spike's blaze of glory moment in the last episode of Buffy... but they leave out Buffy saying "I love you". It's such a blatant omission, the ONLY omission from that scene, that it feels totally deliberate and kind of dishonest. Considering a lot of the Spike and Angel moments in S5 revolve around their jealousy and rivalry towards each other, and a LOT of that is to do with Buffy like... Why would you leave it out? It's a pretty big moment for Spike's character in general.

As far as I recall they don't even mention it, they just mention the fact that Spike and Buffy have had a lot of sex compared to bangel's ONE disastrous time (that they remember) but it does kind of cheapen it for Spike. A big motivation for him not leaving LA could have been him not wanting to hold Buffy to her words, since he clearly doesn't believe that she loves him (even though she does, as per Whedon). He presumably thinks she only said that to make him feel better in his final moments, because she wouldn't have to actually follow through on her words. Which is sad. But it makes much more sense as a motivation than the weird 'it cheapens my moment of glory' excuse like since when does spike give a shit about that

[canisalbus]

I'm sure you get this a lot but because my cousin and I love that one Danny Trejo action comedy, I always have to snap my brain into the right position when I read Machete's name. Maybe I should draw them both chilling

.

[deoidesign]

Allowing myself to work on this comic. A LITTLE. Please....... I'm making comics all day every day please let me chase my bliss a little........... With a different comic...........

[jtypology]

new to typology? 🫂

don't worry, we've all been there!

why learn? well, in short, typology can provide you with a better understanding of yourself and others, unravelling our strengths and weaknesses.

where to start

although many people who are new to typology start off with an interest in mbti (mostly due to the popularity of 16personalities and personality database), i actually recommend starting with temperaments, big 5 and/or enneagram instead.

temperaments (the four temperaments) is an archaic system, one that has its roots in medicine. it is simple and easy to understand, with there being four main types (sanguine, choleric, phlegmatic, melancholic) that you can choose from, or blends between any two of them (for example, i am a blend between melancholic and choleric, therefore my temperament is melancholic-choleric). there are no contradictions between temperaments and any other system, and you can be either dominant in one or a blend of two just like yours truly!

big 5 is an empirically proven and scientifically endorsed typology system. it covers five core aspects of one's personality, such as openness to experience (inquisitive vs non-curious).

enneagram is a lot more complicated than the other two systems i've mentioned, featuring nine distinct personality types. however, i recommend tackling it first or prioritising it over the other systems, as i, and many others, would deem it the most important of them all. there is a lot to it, but that is simply par the course for typology. if you aren't prepared to read and dig deep, then maybe typology isn't for you.

resources :

"the complete enneagram" by beatrice chestnut !

beatrice chestnut is quite beginner-friendly, if you're just starting off, this particular book of hers is your best friend (mainly for enneagram, but also because it is a good taster of what you're getting into).

"gifts differing" by isabel briggs myers & peter b. myers

although i haven't mentioned mbti beyond discussing how newcomers cling onto it (typically 16p users), it is for this reason i feel compelled to share this particular resource. most people drop mbti the further they delve into typology, and i can't say i like the system either. however, this is your learning journey, and it's worth knowing what sites have been inaccurately portraying and selling.

there is lots of information out there relating to typology. other places to search include the internet archive for books and even personality database wiki pages for specific topics. remember to take a break if things get too overwhelming or stressful ! typology is for fun.

🫂