#Warehouse In Atlanta

[logicore]

3PL Warehouse in New York: The Ultimate Solution for E-commerce Fulfilment

While exciting, growth comes with its own drawbacks. While it brings interesting leads to your business, it usually brings its own new challenges. Growing operations is particularly challenging for e-commerce businesses. You have to balance the complexity of logistics and fulfillment against the demands of product development, marketing, and customer support. The e-commerce business has consequently established more 3PL logistics in New York. Read more at https://logicore.weebly.com/blog/3pl-warehouse-in-new-york-the-ultimate-solution-for-e-commerce-fulfilment

[goelectrician]

Electricians in Atlanta 30336 Residential and Commercial Work

Electrician in Atlanta 30336 residential and commercial work, including repair, service, and installation. Equipment dedicated circuits, main breaker panel, transformer, warehouse wiring, switches, and receptacles are covered in our scope of service. Schedule an electrician appointment today, via phone or text messaging. (404) 671-9488 Learn More About an Atlanta Electrician

[stratuspropertygroup]

Industrial Property Market Analysis

Stay ahead of the curve in the competitive commercial real estate market in Atlanta with insights from Stratus Property Group. Our industry expertise and local knowledge ensure you make informed decisions!

[reiderwriter]

📃 Desk Duty 📃

Unit Chief Spencer Reid x Fem Reader

For the CM Kink Bingo Challenge 2024

Summary: After taking a bullet on a case, Spencer orders you to desk duty. After two months of pushing papers and his pushing you away for fear of hurting you, you've had enough.

Warnings: Established BDSM scenario, public sex, masturbation (female and male), mentions of sex toys, breaking and entering, multiple orgasms, squirting, shoe riding, slapping (ass, face, pussy), wet/dirty/messy sex, deep-throaring, face fucking, exhibitionism, risky sex, creampie, sloppy sex, pet play (puppy), Hard Dom Spencer, bratty sub reader, degradation (slut, whore, bitch used). Confessions of love at the end because I'm not a monster.

A/N: Hello, it's me, painfully single, back with another in a series of fics that I think will haunt my (wet) dreams for eternity. Thank you to @lightvixxen for requesting shoe riding all those moons ago, I am so glad we share in the same brand of brain rot. Enjoy~♡

Masterlist || Bingo Board

The first time you were shot, you were surprised it hurt so much. Of course, you knew it was going to hurt. You knew you'd eventually be shot. 

But the graze to your arm stung like a bitch, and had you whimpering on the floor of a warehouse like a small child who'd fallen off their bike for the first time. 

You'd picked yourself back up, and, luckily, the shot had avoided doing any serious damage, but you were relegated to desk duty for two months after. Just until you could prove you weren't traumatised, and there wasn't any permanent damage to your arm.

Two months of staying home while your boss gallivanted around the country, happily diving in front of bullets and jumping on bombs. Two months of staying home waiting for him to come back and rail you. 

You'd been sleeping with Spencer Reid practically since he'd become the Unit Chief, and with the announcement that there were only a few more weeks left until Emily Prentiss came back from her special task force, you were really losing time alone in the office you'd been enjoying the pleasures of one another in. 

Of course, there would still be motel rooms for you later, but soon he wouldn't have the keys to your room, making your secret trysts slightly riskier. You weren't sure you wanted everyone in the office to know just what it was the two of you were getting up to in your spare time. 

So, with your last two months of freedom relegated to desk duty, you sulked. 

Spencer was clear that he was leaving you behind so you could recuperate, but you didn't exactly expect him to go cold turkey. 

You'd been apart before, having been sent on separate inmate interviews, and you'd made do with a poorly connected video call, a dildo and your hands, getting all the inspiration you needed watching him pump his cock in his fist.  

But somehow, your injury had made him borderline chaste, and he refused to even touch you while you were still in - his words, not yours - recovery. 

It had been a month since he'd fucked you. Hell, it had been a month since you'd even seen his cock. A month since you'd had any kind of orgasm, first because your dominant hand had been out of action, and then because you'd felt so frustrated without him, you couldn't bring yourself to do it alone. 

He messaged you daily, called practically once every eight hours, and made sure you were eating and sleeping even from halfway across the country. 

But he didn't make any mention of your growing frustration, even as you tried your best to tempt him into sin. 

A month into purgatory, you'd started hinting at your own needs. Your teammates had taken a case in Atlanta, and you'd stuck behind a days drive away and heard absolutely nothing. 

You'd called, and Luke had picked up, making his presence known before you could royally screw up and beg for something to fuck. 

“H-Hi, Luke. I was just wondering how the case was going. Is there anything I can help with from the office?” You asked, stammering on the phone as you pulled your hand out from between your thighs. 

“You want to help? At 11pm at night?”

“Sure do! You know me… go-getter?” You stuttered the words, not even believing them yourself, biting your lip in anxiety and hoping that Luke would just think you were going stir crazy. 

“I'll hand you to Reid, he's been talking about some case files you might be able to help with.” 

“Thank you,” you said, breathing a sigh of relief. 

You heard the phone switch hands, and then you heard movement until the line went quieter, and Spencer's voice popped into your ear. 

“Y/N?” 

“I miss you,” you sighed before you could say anything else, fingers sliding between your thighs before you could think to stop yourself. 

“I miss you, too,” he whispered hesitantly, but you heard the smile in his voice as he answered. 

“You're working so late tonight, I'd hoped…” you trailed off, feeling your skin heat as your free hands lipped into your underwear and you touched yourself for real this time. 

“We think he's working under the same MO as the Night Stalker, like a copycat, so we're keeping to late hours. What's that sound?” 

“Nothing,” you said, giving your lie away almost immediately with a moan. 

“Are you… Y/N, are you touching yourself?” He asked, already knowing the answer. 

“I told you I missed you. It's been a month since you've touched me, someone has to do it-” 

“Stop it.” 

His words were blunt, and there was no hint of excitement in them, no telling if he was saying this so he could play a part in your unravelling. 

“What?” 

“Stop touching yourself. Y/N, you are not allowed to touch yourself.” 

“Not-? Spencer, what the fuck!” You exploded, sitting up from your comfortable position on the bed, set alight in indignance. 

“I'm the only one that gets to touch you like that, you're not allowed to cum unless I'm there,” he ground out, and just as you heard the smile in his voice earlier, you heard the frustration and arousal now. 

“Well, Spencer, if you'd have brought me along on this case instead of leaving me here, maybe you'd get a say in who gets to make me cum.” 

“Y/N, you're injured, and you haven't been cleared to fly. A doctor needs to-”

“You're a doctor. Technically. You could sign off on me. You could've had me right there in your bed tonight, but no.” 

He scoffed down the line, and you saw his face flash so vividly in your head that it pissed you off. He was hotter when he was angry. 

“Nice try. I tried that myself once, but it doesn't work. Now go to sleep and get some rest.” 

You opened your mouth to argue, but he hung up. His words lit a fire in the pit of your stomach, and you threw the phone down in frustration. 

He wasn't listening again, and you were sick of it, and you we're sick of pushing paper at a cubical when you should've been out in the field doing your actual job. You were sick of being celibate and at home alone, when you should've been in a dark corner somewhere letting your boss use your body, letting him pin you to the wall and work out his frustrations.  

You should've had your lips wrapped around his cock, you should've had his hands buried in your cunt, slapping your ass, his teeth teasing your nipples, something. 

Instead, you had your phone camera and a bed, and a personal vendetta against the word 'no' coming from Spencer Reid's mouth. If he wanted you to stop touching yourself, he'd better get his ass home and make you. 

Shedding your clothes, you set up your camera and began your week long crusade. 

The first video received a response in the form of a call you let go straight to voice mail as you recorded the second one. 

He didn't call again after that, but you knew he watched each and every video you sent. 

You knew he watched the video of you fucking yourself on a wall mounted dildo in the shower. You wondered if he let him imagine it was him, taking his cock in hand in the morning as he washed and prepared himself for the day. 

You knew he watched the video of you playing with your boobs alone in the elevator at work after hours. You wondered if he was still working late when he saw that one, or if, like last time, maybe Luke had grabbed his phone first and seen it before him. . 

You knew he watched the video you shot in his apartment. It wasn't that hard to get into, knowing exactly where the spare key was hidden and letting yourself in comfortably. You let yourself dress in one of his shirts and set the camera up, pushing a bullet vibe inside yourself, and turning on the camera, playing with the hem of the shirt and the sheets below until you finally flashed the camera and him the sight of your wet cunt. 

You filmed a few videos there, fingering yourself, spreading yourself so he could see just how far you'd opened yourself up for him, sinking down on to progressively bigger silicone cocks and mumbling his name over and over again. 

You knew he watched every video, even though you'd sent ten over the space of an evening. You knew he was likely somewhere stroking his large, hot cock, wishing he was buried deep in you, but too stubborn to let you know that now. 

The day after the case ended, you knew that his return meant punishment, but you couldn't stop yourself. 

An hour before the teams expected arrival time, you excused yourself to Spencer's office. The first time he'd fucked you had been in there. He'd pushed you over his lap and slapped some sense into you, spanking you until you were a drippy mess waiting for his cock to enter you sharp and fast. 

You'd since sucked his cock under the desk more times than you could count, and the view from the window was more than familiar to you as you enjoyed being pushed up against it as he took you from behind, the both of you revelling in the fact that anyone could see you defiling the building together. 

With half an hour to spare before he returned and ended your fun and games, you mounted the arm of his couch and began rubbing yourself against it. You rocked your hips slowly back and forth against it - as horny as you were, it was still embarrassing to be so horny you'd resulted to humping pieces of furniture to meet your needs. 

You'd thought about getting drunk and finding a random dick to take home with you, but it didn't interest you half so much as fucking with Spencer Reid did. You'd never had the talk about exclusivity, but you knew just as well as he did that you were locked in. He was your boyfriend, whether he realised it or not.

And now, you simply needed his cock so badly, nothing else would do. The closest you could get was a piece of furniture he'd fucked you on before. 

You slipped your panties off quickly as your timer sounded a ten minute warning, knowing his plane would be landing any second now. You'd factored in the walk from the jet to the office, praying to the gods above that he took the initiative to get ahead on paperwork instead of going straight home. 

You rocked back and forth on the arm of the couch until his door opened narrowly and he let himself in, just as your clit rubbed the corner of the couch and you moaned out gloriously. 

“Y/N,” he hissed as he slammed the door shut. You didn't stop even as he crossed the room and grabbed your hips, instead lunging for his lips and meeting them with your own. 

Your tongue clashed with him for the first time in a lifetime, and you whimpered at how good he still felt pressed up against you. His chest was a solid shield, and your puffy nipples pushed up against it, rubbing deliciously with each grind. His hands were large, his fingers long as they clawed themselves around your hips and drew you up.

“You just can't follow orders, can you?” He asked between kisses, between breaths where you weren't sure if he'd slap you or shove his fingers down your throat. “I should fire you,” he whispered as he reluctantly pulled away. 

“But Spencer,” you said, gasping jokingly as you pawed at the front of his pants. “Who would you fuck on cases then? Who would be your controversially young fuck doll?” 

You meant it to be a joke, but the slap he delivered to your ass made you think twice as you clapped a hand over your mouth. 

His hands roughly pulled you into him again, and you were unable to rise up enough again before he hit you again. You jilted forwards with a little moan and just gave in to the sensation, pressing your face into the pillows as your hips rose. 

“You're acting like such a desperate little slut, I don't think you deserve to even lick my cock. Fuck, I don't even think you deserve to lick my shoe,” his words cut deep as you realised how angry he was, his fingers tangling in your hair he yanked you upwards. 

“Wait, please - Spencer, please, I need-” 

“Need what? You need to suck cock? You need to put yourself on display in a public place? Need everyone around you to know just what it is we do when we're alone?” With each question, he worked on bruising your ass cheeks harder, until he finally pushed you to the floor, and you sank down, automatically spreading your legs for him. 

“Pathetic. You don't deserve this cock, baby.” 

“No!” You cried out, not willing to accept that outcome at all as you panicked. “I'll do anything, please, Spencer, I'll do anything!” 

You whimpered and cried out in real frustration and fear, knowing that he absolutely would kick you out if you didn't act fast. Spencer may have been fine with you taking control some days, but this obviously wasn't one of them. You sat yourself on your knees and clasped your hands together, attempting to seem half the serious devotee and half the irresistible vixen whose chest was accentuated by the movement.

“Okay. Show me just how much of a desperate slut you are,” he said, lifting his foot from the ground and nudging it between your thighs. 

Reluctantly, you widened your stance, spreading apart just enough for him to notch his shoe against your clothed pussy. 

“Ride my shoe, Y/N. You're such a good little boot-licker. It shouldn't be a problem, right?” As if to answer your own question for you, he bobbed his knee gently, and your clit ground into the edge of his shoelaces, causing a sharp, fast burst of pleasure to spark through you. 

You still were too shocked to answer, but he smoothed your hair from your eyes as he continued to bounce his foot, and you left all of your concerns behind, slowly grinding down. 

“What a dirty little slut, I didn't think you'd actually do it.”

Wrapping your arms around his leg, you pressed your hips up and down hesitantly, looking into his eyes as your mouth dropped open in a silent moan. 

“That's it, good girl,” he said, letting his leg go still as you did all the work, shaking your hips back and forth on his shoe as you gave him pleading looks, unable to form words for the overwhelming shame and embarrassment.  

“You look like a puppy,” he blurted out, grabbing a handful of hair and pulling it back, hard, exposing your throat to him as he watched you with curious eyes. “Like one of those puppies who gets so excited to see you, she starts humping you. So fucking horny and desperate. You wouldn't even care who was in the room with us, right now, would you? You'd just keep going until yiu came.” 

You gasped as he slapped your face, tongue falling out of your mouth as he inspected his little play puppy. He smiled, as if happy with your reactions, and leant back on the sofa, releasing your hair from his grip as you continued to struggle in vain toward your orgasm. 

It was another two or three seconds before you realised he was pulling his hard cock from his pants, and another moment or two before he slid his hands back into your hair and guided your dumb, stupid, wet mouth over the top of his cock quickly. 

You let him move your head just how he liked, let him push you down almost farther than you thought you could go. You ground your bare clit down into his shoe as you deepened your breaths, relaxing your body as you took inch after inch of his cock down your throat. 

His hands were wound so tight in your hair that there wasn't space to move. You gagged, once and twice, but he held you in place still, enjoying the spit that spluttered around the base of his cock, the spasms of your contracting throat against the tip and length of his cock. You breathed deeply, ignoring the feeling of his pubic hair tickling your nose, scratching your cheek as you flattened out your tongue under his cock. You wished he would move, wished he would give you the space you needed to cum faster. 

The desperation of the last few months built up and built up, and you knew that you were close to cumming, your hips rocking out of tempo now, crashing into his foot wildly, ass shaking as you felt his shoelaces rubbing uncomfortably against your thighs. 

“God, what a pathetic little bitch, are you going to cum? Cum on my shoe, whore, show me how fucking desperate you are.” 

You felt the exact moment your body convulsed against him, you knew the exact movement that made you cum, because you felt the flood of moisture pool underneath you as you squirted all over his floor. You made a note of reminding him to replace the rug before Emily returned. 

Your whole body shook as you sat in the pool of your own cum, but he refused to let you pull away. 

“Has my little puppy made a mess? What a shame. You can't stop yet, though.” 

His grip on your face somehow became stronger, though not unpleasant, as he pulled your head up the length of his cock. You spluttered slightly, feeling the tension slip out of you as he emptied your throat. You didn't have more than a second to react before he quickly snapped your head back down over his cock, down to the base of his dick. 

“Keep up, Y/N, this is what you wanted, remember.” 

You choked on his cock, and he smiled down at you, taking your gags for nods as he proceeded to fuck your throat, deep and hard. 

“So wet and warm for me, like a perfect little pet,” he said, hips already lifting off the couch as he tried to sink deeper into you. 

You knew from experience that he'd soon grow tired of the limits of your mouth. He liked to hear you. He liked to see you drooling rather than feel it on his skin. As much as he could force his cock down your throat - and you deeply enjoyed when he did - he could get deeper if he sank into your pussy and you both knew it. 

This part was just to lube his cock up, nice and wet, until he could take you nice and quick without having to touch your pussy. He needed you nice and wet and ready for him, especially on days like today where you'd been nothing but a cock tease in need of a harsh fucking. You deserved nothing more.

As predicted, he pulled your head off his cock after a few seconds and hauled you to your feet. You tried to climb onto him, to grip his cock in your hand and just sink down where you belonged, but he stood, too, lifting you up with him. 

“Window,” he said, and you knew he must be close if he was ordering you around one word at a time. You nodded, but he kept his hands on you, moving you to the window quickly. 

You knew he'd bend you over, take you against the outdoor window, whispering in your ear that anyone outside could see you if they just looked up. Instead, this time, he moved you to the opposite side of the office. The window he pressed you against was the one overlooking your desks, the one where, should he happen to open the blinds, every member of your team would be able to look up and watch you take his dick. 

“Everyone left,” he whispered quickly as he shifted the blinds up an inch so you could see. 

You breathed a sigh of relief noting that it was as empty as he claimed, but it didn't last long as he gently pressed his cock into your cunt, finally filling you how you'd needed to be filled for the last 60 days. 

“Fuck, t-thank you, sir!” 

All thoughts about the office below faded as he lifted your leg in his hand and let it rest on the edge of the window, pushing your face against the cold glass. Your office may have been empty, but that wasn't to say that there wasn't someone working late in the other departments, a janitor happening to pass through. 

You knew, but you didn't care as you begged him to fill you up more and more. 

“Just like that, just like that, yes!!! Fuck yes, Spencer I missed this, I missed you. Missed you so much,” you moaned as your hands slipped down the glass, already fogged with condensation, your hot breath hitting the cold glass. 

“Needed this? You've been fucking yourself nightly for the last week. You didn't need this like I needed this,” he moaned, biting into your neck with a sharp kiss as you moaned loudly for him.

“Two m-months. You haven't fucked me for two months, what else was I supposed to do?” 

He groaned in your ear again, reaching a hand around you and slapping your clit as he formulated an answer. 

“Rest, you were supposed to rest,” he said, thrusts speeding up as your cunt gripped him tighter and tighter the closer you got to your second orgasm. 

He groaned and pressed your face into the glass, holding you there and screwing his eyes shut as you both chased release. 

“I didn't want to rest, I w-wanted to be by your side.” 

His head rested against your shoulder as he felt the last waves of pleasure race towards him. His hand pushed down to your clit and rubbed you, sending you right over the edge with him as he filled you with his cum. 

Neither of you could stay upright, collapsing down to the floor in a heap. Usually when he came inside you, he waited a few moments to pull out so he didn't make so much mess when he did. But in his exhaustion, in your shared bliss of finally reaching that precipice after so long, he slipped out early, as cum was still shooting from him. 

You heaped together on the floor, chests heaving as you lay on top of him, your peace only broken by a single thought. 

“We..-’ you gasped, breathing unsteady. “We need to deep clean this office before Emily comes back.” 

He looked down at you, a look so serious and shocked you wondered if he was angry. And then he laughed. Short and soft, he giggled, and you couldn't help but join in, wrapping your arms around your stomach as it began to hurt, chest heaving from the pain of all your joy. 

He sat up and gave you a hand up as well as you surveyed the damage. 

“The rug has to go,” you said, feeling hot and embarrassed as you noticed the new wet stain on the near offensive fluffy thing. 

“We should probably get some new throw pillows, too,” he remarked, and you nodded with a grimace. You made to stand up, but your legs felt weak, and you wobbled, but he was there to catch you, as he stood. 

"Maybe just a new couch," you muttered, flushed with heat as you remembered how you'd humped the arm rest not even twenty minutes ago.

He closed the blinds before moving back to the couch and sitting you down on his lap once again, such a familiar place for you to be these days.

“You….” He started, worrying g his bottom lip with his teeth. “You really missed me?” 

You startled, taken aback by the question. You thought the videos had made it clear, let alone the last half hour of intimacy. 

“I… Yes, Spencer. I missed you a lot. I always miss you.” 

“You… you do?” 

You nodded again and tucked a lock of hair behind his ear. 

“Y/N, when I am no longer your boss, in approximately a weeks time, would you possibly consider being my girlfriend?” 

For the second time in the last two minutes, the man had you floored. And perhaps a little bit angry.

“I'm not… I'm not your girlfriend now?” 

“Hmm? Oh, I-” 

“Because I already told my friends about you, and I was definitely saying the word boyfriend, but if that's not what this is, I can correc-” 

You saw the panicked look in his eye as he pulled you in for one last kiss. 

“That's what this is!” he said frantically, cutting you off when you opened your mouth with another kiss. “I thought you wouldn't think that this was- no!” He kissed you again as you tried again to speak. 

“Listen to me! I'm o-older than you, I thought I had to ask still. Do people not ask anymore?” He kissed you before you could answer. 

“Rhetorical question.”

“I love yo-” you attempted to confess, but his lips covered yours swiftly, even as his eyes opened wide when he pulled away. 

“Wait, no, say that again,” he begged, eyes weak and shiny and absolutely endearingly pathetic. 

You shook your head and sealed your lips, miming, zipping them shut and throwing away the key. 

“Y/N! Tell me again, tell me you love me again,” he said, kissing each of your cheeks. You poked his chest hard, and he kissed you once more. 

“I love you, Y/N,” he whispered, and kissed you again, trying to draw from your lips the words he had cut off earlier, losing himself in the pleasure of the moment as you sat together in the dark office, totally enamoured with one another. 

[omegaversereloaded]

[hex800020]

Fic Rec (GEN):

Most of these are Jason or Tim-centric (bc I play favorites), and almost all (if not all) are tagged angst/comf and happy end.

The ones with a 🩷 are my faves.

Series:

Displacement — GEN • Ongoing series (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Highly recommend reading this in order.”

How Jason makes his way back to the family and, later on, how Damian joins.

Shutterbug — GEN • Series (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Tim makes a living “selling” intel and crucial clues to Batman—until one day, he gets caught in the middle when his parents’ criminal activities come to light.

Jason & Dick:

how lonely to be something that nothing wants to kill — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Jason passively tried to off himself, but Dick got there in time.

🩷The guilt never left, you know — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

While patrolling Crime Alley, Nightwing finds Red Hood being tortured. He saves him and takes him to one of his safe houses, but the newspapers pinned to the walls stir up some old wounds.

Sickening Succession — GEN • 2 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “If they just said what they were thinking, 80% of their problems would disappear.”

Two scenes:

• Dick is down bad, and Jason!Robin helps him

• RH!Jason is down bad, and Dick helps him (fever, hallucinations, the works)

Reciprocation — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Dick calls Jason because he got food poisoning and needs help. (From the Displacement series.)

citrusy sweetness — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Dick peels oranges for Jason because Jason sucks at it.

Under The Shadows — GEN • 8 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Loved the drama and the resolution, but some parts were kinda meh.”

Jason is going feral through Gotham looking for revenge, but he doesn’t want to hurt Tim. Fear toxin gets involved. Dick attempts a self-killing

Two Years Dead — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Grave Pretender but from Dick’s POV.

Two Robins in the Hand — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Dick and Jason turn back into their younger Robin selves.

I’d give you my lungs (so you could breathe) — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “God, I just want world peace and for everyone to be happy.”

Dick randomly shows up at Jason’s place one day, and Jason realizes there’s a lot of stuff he doesn’t remember from his past—like how they once went skiing together.

Glue the wound, my suture’s split — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Dick finds out Red Hood is Jason.

Jason & Tim:

🩷 Red Hood’s Guide to Adoption — GEN • 46 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “I’m gonna vomit hearts.”

Red Hood tries to kill Tim for being “corrupt” (Tim is a fresh “orphan teenage CEO”) but ends up getting attached and starts looking after him like a little brother. (Later, he makes up with Dick and B)

And I Will Be Your Safety — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Who hasn’t kidnapped their sibling at least once?”

Tim is overworking himself (CEO life) and straight-up asks Jason to kidnap him.

🩷 Robin is Magic — GEN • 3 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “I cried like 100 times.”

RH meets civilian Tim (photographer mode), then later attacks the Tower and realizes that Tim (the photographer) is actually Robin/Timothy Drake.

The Moment After — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “It’s the ending.”

Part 2 of Robin is Magic

A Meditation on Railroads — GEN • 5 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “It’s good, has some slow parts, but the last two chapters are gold.”

Tim’s dad leaves him in Atlanta, 800 miles away from Gotham, so he just starts walking because he thinks no one wants him… Jason finds out and tags along.

Middle Children Must Unionize — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “I wish it had another chapter.”

Jason realizes no one gives a damn about Tim, so he fixes the problem himself.

Do Not, Under Any Circumstances, Wake Him Up — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Robin!Tim falls asleep, and RH won’t let anyone wake him up (they’re in a warehouse where RH is planning some raids).

Finding the Line — GEN • 36 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Some plot moments are amazing, but it gets kinda heavy at times.”

Jason (learning to control the Pit) notices Tim has bruises (post-Tower, post-recently deciding not to kill).

Tbh, there are like four different arcs—at one point, Tim has selective mutism.

Green-Eyed Monster — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)“It’s good, but we go from pure hatred to eternal love in like five seconds.”

RH finds his replacement (Robin!Tim) in Crime Alley after he got hit with Scarecrow’s fear gas… friend or foe? (Part 2 of An Excuse.)

Displacement — GEN • 5 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Tim almost kills a man, but Jason makes sure he is the one to do it so Tim doesn’t have to carry the guilt. (From the Displacement series.)

Aftershock — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “I love how Tim is even more messed up than me.”

Tim is deep in PTSD mode after shooting someone and ruining the “no killing” truce between Jason and Bruce. (From the Displacement series.)

Tourniquet — GEN • 5 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “I love how Tim is even more messed up than me x2.”

Tim realizes Jason, Dick, and Bruce are getting along well enough that he isn’t really needed anymore. (From the Displacement series.)

🩷 Combustion — GEN �� 5 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)“10000/10, I’d read this forever.”

Jason gets hit with fear toxin and ends up trapped underground in a vault with Tim… no signal, no one knows where they are. (From the Displacement series.)

Battered But Loved — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Tim tells Jason he’s happy he’s alive—because literally no one else has said it since he came back.

Buttercup — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Tim gets buried alive, and only Jason hears his calls for help.

Bruce Trying to Be a Good Dad:

Don’t Look Back, Them Days Are Gone — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Jason returns to the manor with Damian, and Talia tries to kill him for kidnapping her baby bird.

A Grave Filled With Books — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Oh, I’m gonna cry.”

Batman is late to patrol with Red Hood because Bruce was at a parent-teacher meeting… Jason realizes Bruce has changed.

Collar Bones Begin to Crack — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Batman and Robin!Damian return to the Cave just as Jason is working on a case… brings back some memories.

🩷 Fallback — GEN • 4 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Dick yelling at a sick, childish Jason is peak comedy and comfort.”

Jason has an absolute nightmare of a night—on the verge of hypothermia, multiple injuries… and Batman finds him. (From the Displacement series.)

An Excuse — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “It’s so cute.”

Tim gets hit with fear gas and takes the chance to ask for affection without seeming weird or childish.

Aces High and Cigarettes — GEN • 2 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “It’s so sweet… and concerning.”

Jason hires people to kidnap and bury him alive… sort of a shock therapy thing.

Bury Me Face Down — GEN • 7 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️)

Every time Jason dies, he wakes up in his grave (as his 15-year-old self) and tries to do things differently.

🩷 Five Stages of Immeasurable Anguish — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “I have to recommend this, it’s a gem.”

Jason wakes up buried alive (again), but this time he has comms with the Batfam. ‘Who’s panicking more?’ the one-shot

Grave Pretender — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “LMAO, this is amazing, they’re all dramatic as hell.” “It’s Under the shadows , but a comedy.”

Jason, full theater kid mode, pretends to be his just-crawled-out-of-the-grave self to haunt his family

Other Recs:

A Bespoke Tuxedo His Only Armor — GEN • 1 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “It’s angsty but cute.”

Tim gets shot by Damian while they’re both in civilian mode and is lowkey on his last breath.

Tim Drake Spoiled Brat. (I’m sorry dad) — GEN • 16/? (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Bro, is therapy illegal in Gotham??”

Tim dies at 17 and reincarnates into his younger self. This time, he tries to save the Bats from most of their trauma so they can actually be a family… but he is screwed because he thinks everything is his fault or some shit

🩷 Burning Ashes - The Rise of a Phoenix – GEN • 10/20 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “Only downside? It’s not finished.”

Jason reincarnates (as what seems to be Dick’s bastard kid with some random lady), and at five years old, he kills the Joker. Batman catches him and takes him in… but Jason remembers everything, is pissed about it, and also super traumatized (bc, y’know, he has the psyche of a five-year-old)

Cards on the table – GEN • 30 (⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️) “This is hilarious.”

Tim’s parents faked their deaths and just ditched him, so, in his totally mature 16-year-old wisdom, he starts scamming Gotham’s elite by pretending to be a “psychic” (he just stalks people and makes probability guesses based on the profiles he built on them).

The Waynes hire him, and dude just keeps digging himself deeper (he knows their identities)

“When Tim went out to do what he liked to call research, but what was probably legally classified as stalking, he had to be careful” (Ch. 4)

[adafruit]

The "Nubbin bug" lives - A Star Trek prop resurrection with 3D Printing 🐛🖖🎥

Star Trek: The Next Generation, Season 1, Episode 25 (May 1988), "Conspiracy", was one of my favorites. It featured a mind-controlling alien parasite referred to as the "Nubbin bug", or at least by The Greatest Generation Star Trek podcast.

Back in 1998, there was not a lot of computer CGI, so it was a stop-motion prop. Years later, the co-hosts of The Greatest Generation, a fun Star Trek podcast, stumbled upon the original silicone molds used to create the Nubbin bug while a listener found in a warehouse clearance sale in Van Nuys, California.

The podcasters acquired the mold. Shortly after, a listener from Atlanta who works at a prop studio offered to help preserve the prop since the original rubber material would decay over time. This led to the creation of archival-quality plaster casts to preserve the iconic alien for generations to come.

And they did some more, using 3D scanners - the Nubbin bug was recreated as a 3D model, allowing for exact replicas to be printed. Over 100 of these replicas were made, each one hand-painted and assembled to match the original as closely as possible. Their handmade / 3D-printed versions look almost identical to the bugs that appeared in the episode.

They also designed a Playschool-style retail packaging box to package the bugs. Fans of the podcast can purchase the limited-edition replicas. I don't know if they will post the 3D files, but I'll email and ask.

This is a really cool project from one of the weirdest/best episodes, and I am thrilled that someone was able to preserve this piece of Sci-Fi history in such a cool way - the entire story is on this TikTok video.

No word where this cutie is though.

[logicore]

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[misguidedasgardian]

Wild Cats (Part IX)

IX. The road ahead

MASTERLIST

Summary: You leave Atlanta in hopes of finding refuge, a place to be, to belong

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Zombie apocalypse AU, living dead, zombies, guts, blood, guns, injures, cannibalism, 

+18, MINORS DNI

Notes: Bare it with me, my favorite trope is arranged marriage because I have no idea how to build it up, haha, and Daryl is so complex, but I’m giving it my best shot alright?

You ran out of Atlanta, abandoning like it was riddled with the plague, not that it wasn’t already, but you get the meaning.

You were not going to DC, you were not going to Lake Lanier. 

At least not yet, you were driving Noah to his house first which was on the way to Washington DC, Beth had insisted, You were a big group, you were slower because of it, but all of you were seasoned survivors by now, you were strong together.

You came to know that you had lost Bob, which didn’t personally upset you since you never even spoke to him, but Sasha was terribly sad, as he was her partner, and it was awful to lose someone, whoever that was.

You gathered Gabriel, Michonne, Carl and Judith, and you started your long journey

Usually, it would be like eight hours of driving to DC, but traveling had gotten extremely slow in the apocalypse, especially since most roads were cut. You had barely drove for a couple of hours until you had to stop in a small industrial neighborhood, both because rather the car had decided to stop working and also you needed to change cars and regroup

But the sun was falling over the horizon, so you offered yourself to clear out a bodega nearby, with a couple of floors of offices, more comfortable for sleeping.

“I’ll go with ya”, jumped Daryl, who had barely even looked at you since they rescued Beth. You wanted to say no, that you didn’t need a babysitter

“I’ll go too”, said Rosita, and you were relieved. Something had shifted in the dynamic of that group, Abraham barely spoke, usually he was so driven, but now, since it was revealed that the whole cure thing was a lie, Eugene had an ugly bruise on his face and Abraham sat in the back seat and just looked forwards, didn’t even offer himself to drive.

You and Rosita took the lead while Daryl, behind you, had his crossbow standing in attention. You opened the thick door to the outside to reveal an empty hallway, you took your ax with your left hand and your gun with your right, you had been gifted with being ambidextrous, and you had nurtured it during your time alone.

You knocked on every door, clearing it office by office. 

It wasn’t until you reached the warehouse at the very end of the hallway when the fun began, at least ten walkers came for you as soon as you opened the door.

“Let’s get the party started”, you muttered, Rosita only smirked.

Daryl stood behind you, you felt him shift uncomfortably, as you and Rosita, knife and ax in hand, threw yourself at the walkers

Piercing skulls was more difficult than it seemed, truly. Well, in your experience it really depended on the… state… of the walker you were about to hit.

You drew the first walker blood, as you took the first one out of his undead misery with a swing of your ax, the second one was coming near, so you kicked it, made it stumble back giving you a few moments to take foot and end him too.

At some point this became cathartic. like a relief, you were ending the enemy, fighting the fight, the living VS the dead

You and Rosita fought them all, Daryl ended a couple of them, saying nothing, but you appreciated that he gave you your space to do what you had to do, what you offered yourself to. 

Rosita was badass, she was, her movements were impeccable as she took those walkers out, you exchanged looks and she smiled at you

“Those were some sick moves”, she admitted, “not bad new girl”, you chuckled

“Not so bad yourself Espinosa”, you said back with a wink

Daryl just watched the scene, interested. 

“Should we clean more floors?”, you said

“Damn straight”, she said, “let’s see what else we can find”, she said, after taking a look around, there were only boxes filled with odd metallic pieces you couldn’t recognize. So you moved on from the warehouse, Daryl barely nodded, and followed you like he was your bodyguard

With everything that had happened lately, being saved by Daryl repeatedly and then judged harshly by Carol and him too, you wanted to show what you could do, looking to prove yourself again, but this time, for your own sake, rather than to prove anything to them, if anything, you were annoyed that Daryl was there looking over your shoulder.

You went room by room on the second floor, as usual, you didn’t find anything too exciting. a couple of walkers.

A thing that you never liked to do… was to play detective, to draw a story about who these people were, how did they die if they were alone, you tried not to… look… too much at the scenes. You had seen things, terrible things, that you did not wish to remember right now.

So you tried to separate… walker from person…. they were not people anymore, and that is what you were comfortable with

You took a swing so hard your ax got stuck in the wall, you had to use your leg as leverage to take it out. 

It was a good exercise, you were afraid you were getting out of practice 

You cleaned up every floor, without a single bullet being shot, you took them out one by one.

As you cleared the last office, finding a couple of nice bottles of scotch in what it looked to be the boss’ office 

With complacent smiles and a good bounty you returned to the group after having a couple of swings from the bottle, only Rosita and you, Daryl, denied to take a sip.

You returned and Rick seemed impressed, so they all entered the building you had secured. 

The rest of them were scouting the area, searching specially for gas for the cars. You still had the things you had from your safehouse, so you ate together in a cleared office. 

These moments where odd, dining all together, like a strange family, with lots of uncles, and nephews and nieces

It was odd, but it felt nice.

Then the scotch appeared and they all seemed content, taking drinks, for different reasons…

Many of them celebrated they found Beth and their group was put together again, the others, for sorrows, for the broken promise of a solution to all this madness. Some celebrated that we were fine, and on our path to something better, others tried to drown their fears of the uncertainty of the near future.

But there wasn’t enough buzz for anybody to get really drunk, so after dinner, everybody split up.

Everybody knew what to do for the night, the scavengers looked for useful things around in the small neighborhood, the others prepared for the journey the next day, others set up lookouts points to take guard, Beth and Rick stayed with the kids. 

You felt weary of Rick, and how he treated you so delicately, so, you did what you used to do best, you went to the roof. You were a bit tired after slaying a dozen walkers so, you guessed you could take the first watch from the high point of the area. 

You came out the door of the roof, and you weren’t surprised when you saw Daryl there, you had seen him sneak out of the room when the liquor started pouring 

You were starting to… getting to know him better, he was the guardian of the group, always making sure everyone was safe and fed. You couldn’t sneak up on him, he was already looking at you when you found him.

“You should sleep a bit”, you said softly, he only acknowledged you and nodded, growling a bit. He tended to do a lot of that, just a little rumble, a sound from way inside his throat, but you were learning to interpret them

“What ‘bout ya’?”, he asked

“I have been training myself to sleep at day”, you said, with a soft smile. 

You sat right by his side, completely violating his personal space, but he didn’t seem to mind. It was not that he was paying close attention to what was going on, it was just that he couldn’t sleep. You didn’t say anything, you didn’t speak, you just sat there, breathing softly, looking at the scenery with sharp eyes. He was seated against a big squared vent, close to the edge, so you could see a lot of the area front here, even if you were setting there

You didn’t say anything else.

. . . 

It’s been a while since Daryl felt this peaceful

He felt relaxed, even deep in slumber, when he started to come to his senses, he felt a soft sway, like the one of a boat in a tranquil lagoon with barely any ripples in water. Then, he heard, he felt, your soft breathing, on top of his head, on his forehead, the first thing he saw when he opened his eyes was the top curve of your breasts, hiding comfortably in your brassier, under your soft looking shirt with a generous V-neck line. He saw your chest, your beautiful skin, how soft it seemed, he wished he could touch it… he tried to look up but the angle didn’t allow him to see your face, so he regained control of his body and he separated himself from you.

There you were, peacefully sleeping as he had been, the sun was already shining softly in the horizon.

When he realized how much he was leaning into you he separated himself from you, and that is what woke you, the lack of the presence of the archer stuck to your side as it was when you finally went to sleep

He couldn’t believe he had lowered his guard like this, and not because he didn’t trust you, but because he was supposed to be on guard, vigilant, taking care of his group

“It’s already morning”, you said groggily

He couldn't believe he had been looking at your cleavage, what was he thinkin?

He couldn't believe he had been looking at you like a deer in headlights since he met you, that he had never felt this comfortable in who knows how long, that he was almost impressed when he saw how you took down those walkers with only your ax, he couldn’t believe he was… feeling this… things… he… he stood up like the floor was lava, like you would burn him

“We gotta go”, he said quickly, you barely nodded, and he left you there, alone.

You didn’t even understand what was going on, but he almost sprinted full speed away from you. 

You stood up, the uncomfortable position you took all night taking a toll on your sore extremities, but to no matter, he was right.

You went down the stairs and found Rick, Carol, Glenn and Maggie, who looked at you and where you had come from. Rick looked at you kind of concerned, Maggie and Glenn with funny faces, entertained, and Carol seemed angry.

“Morning”, you greeted softly, “is everything alright?”

“Except by the fact that Daryl ran off, yes”, said Maggie with a silly smile, you felt your cheeks heated, looking everywhere but at their faces

“We were discussing how to proceed ahead”, said Rick, “with the big group we have”, you nodded and kept walking.

“No luck with more gas?”, you asked, and they shook their heads, “there are other towns nearby”, you said softly.

“Yes, let’s move to the next one”, said Rick, “let’s pack up and go”, he commanded

“I’ll make sure everybody has some place to take provisions, so we can divide the weight”, said Carol.

You walked back where everybody was refreshing themselves, you had found a working bathroom so everybody took turns to freshen up. You had checked the tank upstairs and still was halfway filled with water.

“Where have you been?”, asked Rosita with a smirk

“I slept on the roof, old habits die hard I guess”, you said with a shy smile

“Alooone?”, she tease, but you only shook your head with a smile, and kept moving

Last night meant nothing, you literally just offered your shoulder to sleep on and he accepted, nothing less or nothing more. 

Everybody packed up, and you started moving, leaving the huge fire truck behind.

You started walking North, you were a big group and you felt safe, for the first time in ages, there were no hordes or walkers near and you followed a road up north, a small road, to not draw too much attention to yourselves, from neither the living or dead.

You walked until you saw a sign, saying that you were already in South Carolina, you had left Georgia behind, and your plan to go to Lake Lanier. You don't resent Rick for leading you towards Washington, it was the sanest idea.

You didn’t even know what was there, an old margarita ville, cabins, yachts and a big hotel, it could be a huge bust, right?

So you just went along, is not like you could separate from them and go yourself, you didn’t want to split up, you felt safe with them, you felt like a force of nature, to be reckoned with 

At first, you were walking all together, on a line, as the day progressed you started to separate in groups, some started talking amongst themselves, you got a bit delayed and walked behind them, hand in your holster, ready for everything.

You were guarding them, taking care of them even from a bit afar, so that would give you a bit of perspective for possible dangers.

The sun was burning you from above, right a the center of the sky when you stop for something to eat

You still had bottled water to last you for today and maybe breakfast tomorrow, but no more than that, so you hoped you could find a town for tonight.

RIck looked for you with his eyes, and when he found you, he seemed concerned

“You alright?”, he asked, cradling Judith against his chest, you nodded

“Yeah sure”, you muttered

“I know you believed Lake Lanier was the way to go, but…”

“It's fine Rick”, you said simply, “I was just protecting our backs”, you said with a smile, he nodded placing a hand on your shoulder

“Thank you”, he said

You helped Tyresse, Beth, Carol and Noah to make food for everyone, Daryl set the fire of course and then escaped into the woods, out of sight. 

You baked some canned beans, in cans, and everyone seemed contented, you didn’t have anything better, and there were a lot of you, 

You wondered what happened to all the farm animals… in farms… the dead also ate animals, the fuckers, they were going to eat you too… farms you gathered, were screwed, specially those with small paddocks, nowhere for the animals to run from the dead.

You really wanted some eggs and rice right now, you never liked beans.

You chuckled just thinking about it, oh the things you had to eat now…

“What’s so funny?”, asked Rick, truly interested, you only shook your head

“I was just thinking how I wish I could eat eggs with rice right now, I never liked beans, and then I remembered we are in the middle of the apocalypse”, you laughed, and despite the surreal of the situation, everybody laughed

“I would give everything for some barbecue ribs”, muttered Abraham

“Tacos al pastor”

“A cheeseburger”

“Sushi form that japanese place near my apartment”

“Ceviche”

“Some pizza from Domino’s”

And everybody shared their desired foods, well, except Sasha, she looked utterly horrified by the topic, like she couldn’t believe what you were saying

You continued after that, taking out the fire.

You kept moving.

This time, you wanted to walk back, like you have done, but Daryl, surprisingly, had the same idea, he walked behind the group, and naturally, you started walking together.

“What was your favorite food?”, you asked him softly

“Wha’?”, he asked back

“Back there we all shared what we would like to eat, from before”, you said, “what would be your food?”, you asked softly, he looked back at you quizzically

“What kind of idiot question is tha’?”, you looked down, a bit embarrassed

“Well, just making conversation”, you whispered. an awkward silence stood between you now.

“Roast chicken”, he said then, you looked up at him

“Good choice”, you said, “A classic”, he looked at you, you looked back at him, and he actually smiled softly at you.

You kept walking, in a silence that wasn’t awkward anymore.

@crazyunsexycool

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[yandere-paramour]

All the recent Ata asks have spiralled my little bunny brain into coming up with like the perfect most pathetic wet cat useless lesbian darling for Atlanta and uuggghhhh if only I could wriiteeeee ;^;

Anyways I gots a totally rad little bunny question for your silly yandere’s >:3

How would they all fair with a darling who’s either a voluntary shut-in, or a shut-in due to outside circumstances? (Like chronic illness, agoraphobia, etc etc)

This question is very normal and not at all sparked because of anything going on with me nope nope my bones are pawfectly fine :3

-The nervous bunny in your ask bin

Oh, Noelle LOVES this. She loves her perfect Darling safely inside the apartment. She will absolutely spoil you with anything you desire, and anything you could possibly be interested in, she will ask a favor of Atalanta to get it to you. Like seriously, she will ask Ata to set up a Broadway musical in a secret warehouse just to please you. She loves staying at home with you; being safely in the house with her perfect Darling is the ideal scenario.

Atalanta doesn't mind it. If you are this way, her brain unconsciously associates you with her father and she thinks "oh... this one is fragile". She understands how to deal with a fragile Darling; remember she learned from the best. You will be treated like you are made of glass and every decision will be made to keep you as safe and healthy as possible. She won't even make you come to galas or public events with her if you're not comfortable. You will be for her eyes only💙.

Vivien is probably the worst with this. He's an energetic little guy. He doesn't like staying bored in the house; he wants to take his Darling out on the town and have fun with them. A Darling who couldn't come out and have fun with him would make it difficult for him and his hyperactive personality. He wouldn't say anything, he would just suffer in silence because his skin crawls when he's not doing something.

[fartlovingblkguy69]

The Little Men’s Toilet Slave Part 1

(Fictional Gay Fart and Scat Story)

I was drunk and walking through an alley of empty warehouses in Atlanta coming back from the bar one night at night when I passed a building that seemed to have much coming from inside and I heard this strange noise! It sounded like a cross between a grunt and a howl! I went inside to be nosy and to help if need be. Lo and behold it looked like an orgy, but not just any orgy. This was an orgy of about 30 little men. And they were filming! The tallest man, who was standing in the middle of the room was 4’9 with black hair and green eyes and he seemed to be directing all of the scenes. I realized they were about to make a killing as this was a growing category of porn and many of them were unbelievable hot! I felt myself getting a boner, one of the hardest I’d ever gotten, my full 8 inches rising. I fiddled with my jeans and started to jerk my hard rod when the taller man turned and noticed me. “What the fuck? Who let you in here? Stop fucking and grab him and bring him over here ” he yelled. A bunch of them ran over and took me out at the knees before carrying me over the heads and throwing me down at his feet. “What the hell did you think you were doing? Were you spying on us? Maybe trying to scope out competition for another group? And why were you jerking off? You like what you see or something? Maybe you’re one of those weirdos that fetishize little people or something.” “No, I was just passing by when I heard you guys and thought someone might be in trouble so I came to help! I’m gay and you guys are hot! It has nothing to do with you being small, I swear!” “I’m not sure I believe you! And after what you’ve seen we can’t let you leave! You might have a recording or call the cops or something.” “Hey Kyle! Let’s stomp on him! We could crush up his bones and bury him or something! There’s a landfill nearby!” one of the ones currently standing above me chimed in. He was about 3’9, blond, with a hairy chest, rock hard abs, a thick happy trail, and a 5 inch long, 2 inch thick half hard dick. He was super hot, but He’d been glaring at me this whole time with hard icy blue eyes like he wanted to kill me. It was very intimidating. “Hmm maybe. That would certainly be a fun idea. I think I have a better one tho!” the director Kyle said as his stomach gurgled loudly and he winced. He rubbed his stomach and loudly proclaimed “you guys have all been complaining about not being taken seriously by society and also about the lack of bathrooms in this place and I think we might have just found a small, well pretty big solution to both!” Now for context I’m a 6’3 pretty muscularly built white guy, albeit with a bit of a belly. I have long curly brown hair that comes halfway down my back. I cannot believe what I’m hearing. Just what the hell is this guy suggesting anyway? I was about to find out! “Take him to the bathroom and tie him down with his head over that broken toilet! He’s gonna be the replacement!” Kyle said smiling while rubbing his very hairy muscular, but not ripped stomach. I’ll use him first and show you all how it’s done! You better get ready toilet! I got a big load coming your way! We’ve been here for hours and I’ve been munching on pizza and nachos and chugging coffee and protein shakes and I’m lactose intolerant! It’s gonna be a wet ride!” I was dragged to the broken toilet which was dirty and clogged already and watched as they wiped the toilet seat off and cleaned it before flushing the toilet to make the water rise and then plunging my head down yelling “Drink, drink, drink!” trying to make me drink this murky water with a huge turd at the bottom. I refused to open my mouth preferring to drown to death but alas they would pull me up every time I started to black out! This went on for a good 25 minutes before Kyle came in pushing people out of his way, saying, “It’s time! I gotta let this nasty shit rip! My stomach is killing me! I can’t hold it anymore and the filming space is basically uninhabitable from my noxious farts! You boys don’t want me to hold this a second longer, trust me!”

[justinspoliticalcorner]

AP, via The Guardian:

Nearly 44 years after Jimmy Carter left the country’s capital in humbling defeat, the 39th president returned to Washington DC for three days of state funeral rites starting on Tuesday. Carter’s remains, which had been lying in repose at the Carter Presidential Center since Saturday, left the Atlanta campus on Tuesday morning, accompanied by his children and extended family. Special Air Mission 39 departed Dobbins air reserve base north of Atlanta and arrived at Joint Base Andrews in Maryland. A motorcade carried the casket into Washington for a final journey to the Capitol, where members of Congress will pay their respects. In Georgia, eight military pallbearers held Carter’s casket as cannons fired on the tarmac nearby. They carried it to a vehicle that lifted it to the passenger compartment of the aircraft, the blue and white Boeing 747 variant that is known as Air Force One when the sitting president is on board. Carter never traveled as president on the jet, which first flew as Air Force One in 1990 with George HW Bush. The scene repeated outside Washington. The former president’s casket was removed from the plane, cannons fired and a military band played. A hearse emblazoned with the seal of the president joined a motorcade that steered toward Washington.

A bipartisan delegation of members of Congress were led in to the Capitol rotunda by Senators Raphael Warnock and Jon Ossoff, Democrats who represent Carter’s home state. Three of the nine US supreme court justices were also present. Justices John Roberts, Brett Kavanaugh and Elena Kagan stood next to the Washington DC mayor, Muriel Bowser, in the rotunda. The US army band brass quintet played as people awaited the casket’s arrival. Carter, who died 29 December at the age of 100, will lie in state on Tuesday night and again on Wednesday. He receives a state funeral on Thursday at Washington National Cathedral. Joe Biden will deliver a eulogy. There are the familiar rituals that follow a president’s death: the air force ride back to the Beltway, a military honor guard carrying a flag-draped casket up the Capitol steps, the Lincoln catafalque in the Rotunda.

There also will be symbolism unique to Carter. As he was carried from his presidential center, a military band played hymns – Amazing Grace and Blessed Assurance for the outspoken Baptist evangelical who called himself a “born-again Christian” when he sought and won the presidency in 1976. In Washington, his hearse stopped at the US Navy Memorial, where his remains were transferred to a horse-drawn caisson for the rest of his trip to the Capitol. The location nods to Carter’s place as the lone US Naval Academy graduate to become commander-in-chief.

All of the pomp carries some irony for the Democrat who went from his family peanut warehouse to the governor’s mansion and eventually the White House. Carter won the presidency as the smiling southerner and technocratic engineer who promised to change the ways of Washington – and eschewed many of those unwritten rules when he got there. From 1977 to 1981, Carter was Washington’s highest-ranking resident. But he never mastered it.

The late former President Jimmy Carter’s remains are in DC for funeral rites leading up to tomorrow’s state funeral.