#WTF DID PATRICK DO

[tombstoneswerewaiting]

ending it all

[poetry-protest-pornography]

How to use super subtle metaphor to get your vampire boyfriend to sex you up:

Bonus; Jolie and Chin using real words to communicate, and being generally adorable (before smooching about it):

[exceptmyserotonin]

last night i dreamt i went to get some medical procedure done and patrick stump was the anesthetist. only there was no medical procedure performed or other medical staff present. it was just patrick in the office with a vial of propofol and a syringe 💀 man put me to sleep for shits and giggles and stood in the corner of the room until i woke up 🤨 he took me to get lemonade after tho so a win is a win

[propertyofwicked]

FAKING AN INTEREST

f1 grid x platonic!reader (implied landoxreader) smau

based on this request! (this may need a pt 2 honestly)

warnings: none, just men having the audacity

masterlist the playlist

⭑･ﾟﾟ･*:༅｡.｡༅:*ﾟ:*:✼✿　　✿✼:*ﾟ:༅｡.｡༅:*･ﾟﾟ･⭑

-----------

yourusername made a new post!

liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri, and 21,223 others

yourusername what the fuck is a DRS?

view all 9,211 comments

danielricciardo what he say fuck me for?

⤷ yourusername hi! im free may 28 if you want to hangout may 28 lmk im not doing anything may 28 please msg me if ur available may 28 so we could maybe hangout or do something may 28 !!

⤷ danielricciardo ill clear my schedule - what day did u say u were free?

⤷ username1 mad about being labelled as a fake f1 fan only to turn around and flirt with the drivers? is she fr?

⤷ yourusername get a job, touch grass?

username2 how does she know them im so confused

⤷ username3 she went to school with oscar i think?

logansargeant will you stop posting the worst pictures of me?

⤷ yourusername say please?

⤷ logansargeant please y/n im begging

⤷ yourusername start using the metric system and i'll consider it.

lilymhe come back to williams i miss u

⤷ yourusername can i bring lilyzneimer? 🥺

⤷ lilymhe omg yes!! lily-ception

⤷ oscarpiastri @/yourusername dont take my girlfriend to enemy territory tf?

⤷ logansargeant enemy? ☹️

yourusername made a new post!

liked by lilyzneimer, oscarpiastri, and 34,502 others

yourusername congrats on driving fast bestie

tagged: oscarpiastri, lilyzneimer, jensonbutton

view all 7,210 comments

username4 jenson button? what are you doing here?

⤷ yourusername forming a danica patrick hate club

⤷ yourusername we're discussing gentle parenting tactics for logan <3

⤷ logansargeant is this why jenson keeps telling me that sharing is caring??

⤷ jensonbutton in my defence i told her it wouldn't work 🤷

⤷ yourusername we'll see about that - alex_albon do you feel cared for?

⤷ alex_albon im staying out of this.

oscarpiastri thank you y/n!

⤷ yourusername so proud of u bestie

⤷ oscarpiastri i already paid for dinner you can stop pretending to be nice now

⤷ yourusername brb faking an interest in our friendship rn

⤷ username10 she's never letting that comment go fr

username7 their friendship confuses me but im so here for it

username8 oscar paid? who's shocked

⤷ username9 not me!

⤷ username10 not me!

⤷ yourusername me tbf he usually forgets his wallet

⤷ oscarpiastri i leave it on purpose, actually

⤷ yourusername gold digger 🫵

username8 she literally only goes to the races so that she can post about it on ig and pretend she knows what's going on

logansargeant you never congratulate me :(

⤷ yourusername tf u want me to congratulate u for? brushing your teeth?

⤷ logansargeant no one else will :(

username6 where did u find that picture of oscar?

⤷ yourusername wdym find? i took it loool

yourusername made a new post!

liked by logansargeant, lilymhe and 7,893 others

yourusername glorified uber drivers

tagged: logansargeant, alex_albon

view all 1,235 comments

logansargeant best biscuits ever

⤷ username5 biscuits?? that wasn't very wtf is a kilometer of you

⤷ yourusername one of us! 🇬🇧 one of us! 🇬🇧 one of us! 🇬🇧

⤷ landonorris one of us! 🇬🇧 one of us! 🇬🇧 one of us! 🇬🇧

⤷ alex_albon one of us! 🇬🇧 one of us! 🇬🇧 one of us! 🇬🇧

⤷ logansargeant oh! so this is hell!

landonorris cute! don't do it again!

⤷ yourusername i snapped the head off yours hoping it was a voodoo doll.

⤷ username3 do they hate each other or..?

⤷ yourusername yes.

⤷ landonorris cancelling our lunch plans

⤷ yourusername i was kidding pls dont im so hungry

⤷ username4 lunch plans? y'all seeing this???

username6 the picture of logan im dead

⤷ yourusername he was modelling for his cookie design

lilymhe i want the alex one

⤷ yourusername boxed it up just for u <3

⤷ yourusername alex said he'd give it to u later

⤷ alex_albon i lied. i ate it. no regrets.

yourusername made a new post!

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 24,789 others

yourusername lando norris fakes an interest in the menu

tagged: landonorris, oscarpiastri

view all 1,432 comments

username5 y/n out here living our dream </3

⤷ username6 god i have seen what you've done for others 🙏

⤷ yourusername lando eats chicken nuggets with a fork you can have him

⤷ landonorris this is defamation, my lawyers will be in contact.

landonorris in my defence, that place was FANCY and i wanted to pretend i wasn’t about to order chicken nuggets and chips

⤷ yourusername fancy?? oscar literally ordered a cheeseburger??

⤷ oscarpiastri dont expose me like that y/n

⤷ logansargeant one of us! 🇺🇸🦅 one of us! 🇺🇸🦅

⤷ yourusername it's not funny when u do it <3

logansargeant you never want to go to lunch with me :(

⤷ username7 logan try not to get jealous challenge - hard

⤷ yourusername i literally had brunch with you like yesterday?

⤷ logansargeant ok and?

username11 she is never gonna let that comment go is she. we get it, you know f1.

⤷ yourusername why should i?

⤷ username11 it wasnt that deep

⤷ yourusername why should i give david coulthard the platform to perpetuate negative commentary on women in motorsport?

⤷ yourusername why do we keep allowing men to talk down to women with genuine interests instead of providing them with opportunities to excel in the field?

⤷ username2 say it louder for the people in the back queen

username1 lando looks so fineeeee

⤷ yourusername too bad he sucks at chess

⤷ landonorris you cheated!

lilymhe u look so sexy let me take u out 🫢

⤷ yourusername only if ur paying 🫢

⤷ lilymhe we’ll put it on alex’s card

⤷ yourusername sounds good

⤷ alex_albon do i have a say in this?

⤷ lilymhe no.

⤷ yourusername no.

⤷ landonorris no.

⤷ oscarpiastri no.

yourusername made a new post!

liked by lilymhe, logansargeant and 31,245 others

yourusername y/n l/n fakes an interest in getting her degree 🍾🥂

tagged: ybfusername, youruniversity

view all 2,103 comments

landonorris that caption isn't even a lie 🤐

⤷ yourusername sorry cant hear you over the sound of me being a graduate

⤷ landonorris did you not literally spend the last year asking if you’d “finish this degree or if it would finish you” ??

⤷ yourusername i literally have a piece of paper that says i finished it

⤷ landonorris talk to me when you get a trophy

⤷ yourusername ok mr won one race now thinks hes the shit

⤷ username4 gagged.

landonorris but fr, congratulations y/n! proud of you always!

⤷ username4 always huh? im smelling soft launch

⤷ username9 go back to bed grandma

oscarpiastri congrats on reading and writing stuff bestie!

⤷ yourusername thanks king! <3

username6 intelligent queen we loveee

username6 suck on that david coulthard.

⤷ yourusername he better be sleeping with one eye open

⤷ username11 got a degree and now thinks she's better than a literal racing legend

⤷ yourusername dude do u like need a hug or something? if i didn't know any better id think you were in love with me

username2 shes so unserious i love her

lilyzneimer congratulations gorgeous!

⤷ yourusername congratulations to you too lil <3

⤷ username3 hot girls get degrees 🤷 i don't make the rules

⤷ lilyzneimer still cant believe the girl that used to sleep in biology graduated university

⤷ yourusername me neither tbf

⤷ oscarpiastri same.

⤷ yourusername no one asked u vroom vroom

username13 what was your dissertation on?

⤷ yourusername net-zero carbon development in race mechanisms and engineering !

⤷ username13 oh you SMART smart

⤷ landonorris debatable

logansargeant well done! does this mean no more highlighters abandoned on the floor of williams hospitality?

⤷ alex_albon please say yes 🙏

⤷ yourusername but watching you trip over them was so funny 😟

ybfusername those 3am library trips finally paid off! 🙏

⤷ yourusername jet lagged delirium and caffeine i will miss u

⤷ ybfusername im so proud of us

lilymhe graduate, baker, sexiest woman alive - is there anything you cant do?

⤷ yourusername have a genuine interest in motorsport 🤷

⤷ lilymhe wait till they find out you fake an interest in golf too 💀

⤷ yourusername im only there to see u bbygirl

yourusername made a new post!

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 24,789 others

yourusername here to watch my friends drive fast cars.

tagged: lilymhe, landonorris

view all 703 comments

landonorris well, some of us drive fast cars

⤷ alex_albon what are you trying to say?

⤷ landonorris speak up a bit i cant hear you from the podium

username8 lando? yn?

⤷ username8 i feel like im interupting something

⤷ username4 can we let them just be friends and not ruin this pls

lilymhe oh we are so back

⤷ yourusername and we’re never leaving! <3

⤷ alex_albon oh god

⤷ logansargeant please no

⤷ yourusername fine, ill leave 😟

mclaren hope to see you in our garage soon y/n!

⤷ yourusername i have always looked good in papaya

⤷ username8 admin how much did lando pay u to say that?

⤷ mclaren 🤫

oscarpiastri williams take her back she keeps slapping my hat across the room

logansargeant you literally told me you're only here to get max’s autograph and sell it on ebay?

⤷ yourusername ok and?

⤷ maxverstappen1 poster or hat?

⤷ yourusername both please 🫶

⤷ maxverstappen1 bring a pen

⤷ username7 what have i just read?

⤷ maxverstappen1 im supporting y/n's financial endeavours?

[zweiginator]

Stepbro!patrick having to spank reader’s ass after he let her come to a club with him and his friends and she kept grabbing him and biting his neck in front of everyone🙂‍↔️ like wtf are you doing girl

this happened early on; you had just met patrick three weeks prior. one of those weeks was pure. patrick opened doors for you and pulled your chair out for you at the dinner table. tried to impress upon you that patrick is a nice boy. that he is respectable. he thought it would help get you in your panties, ironically enough.

and it did. it was easy to give you a lopsided smirk, to lean over you with just his little tennis shorts on after a match one night in early june and tell you how pretty you looked. he fucked you in his car that night, rocking you on top of him and neither of you really had to worry because it was all so new and it was late at night in an abandoned waffle house parking lot and the talk of boundaries was far, far into the future.

except it never happened.

patrick invited people over; some friends of his who were in college were back in town. they shook your hand, told you it was nice to meet you. whispered in patrick's ear.

your step sister is fucking hot.

patrick bit his lip. he joked being upset with them.

"hey watch it, perv."

in reality, patrick was feeling like shit. for obvious reasons. because his eye twitched when his friends ogled at your body when your back was turned and you were laying a towel out by the pool. you looked innocent and sweet, wearing an old bikini of yours that was a bit too small. your skin was sunkissed and you clutched the book you were reading under your arm as you straightened the towel out, your lip tugged between your teeth.

he was feeling like shit because there were plenty of girls out there for him. young and pretty and obsessed with him. girls who batted their eyes and twirled their hair and pushed their tits out. it was a fucking joke that the physical embodiment of his dream girl was sucking on a grape popsicle in his backyard, his step sister.

so he told his friends

"we should go out tonight."

they agreed. and patrick thought he would put all this behind him. he would tell you this was over and your eyes would grow glassy but he would rip the band aid off and that would be that.

but as they were leaving just before midnight, you came out of your room, tugging on the hem of a tiny black mini skirt. your lips were an iridescent sheen of vanilla lip gloss and patrick rubbed his temple.

"where do you think you're going?" patrick asked, gesturing to your outfit.

"out with you guys." you blinked up at him, as if it were the most obvious answer in the world. you weren't even in the room when he had brought the plans up.

patrick's friends didn't care, in fact they welcomed it. but patrick was searching for an excuse to get you to fucking stay home. he saw right through your facade. you knew how he felt about that mini skirt; he fucked you in it last week. bunched it around your waist and told you not to wear that skirt around unless you want me to fucking fold.

so he knew you were full of shit. but it was getting late and his friends didn't see the big deal and it's not like he could've explained his reasoning. so he said fine.

you were drinking too fast. guys were lining up to buy you shots and you happily accepted every single one. to the point where patrick couldn't flirt with anyone else. he couldn't fucking do anything because you were being stupid. pushing all his buttons to see which one was the detonator.

and you were so drunk that patrick coming to save you from the eyes of a creepy older man ogling you made him your knight in shining armor--and you just wanted to thank him. so you hung all over him. held onto his bicep and stood on your tippy toes to press kisses to his neck.

patrick's friends looked at him quizzically and he yanked you away from him but you were fucking velcroed to him.

you whispered in his ear, pulled him by his belt. ghosted your palm over his growing erection.

"want your dick in my mouth. we haven't done that yet. you wanna fuck my mouth?"

it wast too loud for anyone else to hear it. but patrick's cock twitched and he blushed.

"she feels sick. she's drunk." patrick explained to his friends, as if that answered their slew of questions.

he dragged you to the bathroom, cutting everyone else in line. he could do that, when he had you in a death grip and he told you to act sick. you felt it. you had never seen him this pissed.

patrick locked the door and sat on the toilet.

"what're you doing--" you asked, giggling.

patrick pulled you over to him.

"bend over my lap."

"why?"

he forced you to.

"you wanna be a slut in public? i'll treat you like a dumb little slut."

he pulled your skirt up.

"you're a dirty fucking girl."

you were still confused and the room was spinning but then patrick spanked you. yanked your hair back, and delivered them one by one. he wasn't gentle; every smack was done with every ounce of his strength and he told you to fucking take it.

this would teach you, he thought. but as he pulled your skirt down over your red cheeks, his finger brushed against your cunt. it was the wettest he had felt you--which was saying something.

[artdcnaldson]

i need to be like patricks sister, whos at stanford with art, and just so in love with art. like totally enamored, puppy dog love, and just so terribly needy for him. and he knows. he is fully aware. but he wont do anything for the sake of patrick and their friendship. i need us to be in his dorm room one night, with him in that stupid sexy snapback, trying my hardest to persuade him, promising i wont tell patrick. what would the harm be if no one found out? i need art to tell me i can never have his cock :((( and that i'll just have to touch myself to the thought of it instead :((( (i could keep going, im going crazy)

KEEP GOING 🗣️🗣️🗣️

His restraint is literally so thin, because you’re following him to stupid frat parties in slutty outfits and getting stupid drunk, and he has to take care of you because you’re Pat’s sister.

And every time he takes you back to his dorm you’re clinging to him all needy, pouting and asking for him to tuck you in like he used to when you were a kid :((( he rolls his eyes. He only did that, like, once when you were nine and he was twelve and you came into the room him and Patrick were sharing because you had a nightmare.

“I’m not fucking doing that,” he says firmly, and you pout, but pretty soon you’re passed out on to of his blankets, face smushed against his pillow, skirt hiked up and— fucking Christ— he can see your cute little panties beneath them.

It’s worse when you’re sober, when he knows you know what you’re doing, when he can’t brush it off as you being drunk and stupid. When you ask him why he won’t just fuck you? You know he thinks you’re pretty, you see him looking at your tits, and your friends have caught him staring at your ass when you’re at parties. You both want it, so why is he being so mean?

And he can get meaner. He’ll have to, because Patrick is his friend, you’re just his clingy little sister. So he’s firm, he tells you he’s never going to fuck you, never going to kiss you, or date you, or be your sweet little boyfriend. That the closest you’ll ever get to him is your little fantasies in your head while you play with yourself at night :(

And maybe he does feel guilty, because you’re all teary eyed and your lip wobbles and you mutter apologies in a watery voice before you leave.

That night, when Patrick texts him “bro wtf did u say to her?????” He just groans and ignores it. There’s literally no right choice for him :(

[jaegerisim]

Vent post y'all are gonna hate me for.

I viscerally hate how the Duffers treat most of their non white or queer characters and I hate even more viscerally, how y'all big byler blogs in your circle jerk of other 5 big byler blogs casually like to ignore many red flags the show has.

Y'all like to say: "tHe DufFeRs ArE gReAt WrIteRs" and it's like girl, who are you lying to??? They aren't top shit writers at all. The Duffers are pretty mid imo. Yeah, they run a good show that's fun to watch and theorize abt , but that doesn't mean they're good writers cuz they're not.

1. they completely side lined Will during s3 for the sake of their straight romances: lumax, jancy, mlvn, duzie and partly stobin (even if stobin wasn't endgame, thankfully, Steve's intentions were clearly wanting to date Robin and they gave it a lot of screen time). Will was sidelined bc he didn't fit the straight romance plotline bc they planned to make him gay or whatever. Now in s4 Will and his feelings have been used as mlvn toilet paper. Yes, we like to say this is build up for byler but canonically, Will's feelings have been used to clean the shit mlvn leaves behind.

2. Billy was sympathized a lot during the last 2 seasons. They gave him the sad backstoryTM in order for ppl to feel sorry for him. Billy's backstory is literally Jonathan's but whatever.

3. El's anger issues are constantly girlboss-ified. They down play her bullying situation and literally just use it for El to be a ''girlboss" without realizing how triggering that is. As someone who has lived bullying, seeing it be ignored by canon and fanon is super sad. The whole Rink-O' Mania experience must have been so traumatizing for her yet, everyone absolutely forgets abt it 🤷🏻‍♀️

4. Robin, Erica and Argyle are stereotypical characters. Robin is the quirky lesbian with social anxiety, Erica is the badass black woman and Argyle is the Latino stoner that sells weed to white kids and works as a pizza delivery guy.

5. Altho Argyle and Eddie both do drugs, (Eddie actually sells K-12 to a minor and nobody batted an eye. He has a huge fan base). Eddie is held in a pedestal bc "poor thing 🥺 he lives in a trailer with his uncle 🥺". Tell me a single fact you know abt Argyle that isn't "he smokes weed", "he is Jonathan's only friend", "drives a van" and "he works at a pizzeria". Exactly, Eddie is given a useless backstory and Argyle isn't.

6. Dustin stopped being important to the plot sometime around s2 and s3. He is only there to curse and be mildly funny. My guy needs to hangout with ppl his age cuz he only hangs out with seniors.

7. El needs to stop having so much "I'M THAT BITCH" screentime like I need in s5 for El's arc to not just be her becoming more powerful and falling in love with Mike. I need the Duffers to explore her trauma and problems.

8. Angela should have been run over by the van.

9. Patrick should have been given a backstory that isn't the basic "strict black parents that hit their kids cuz they are a disgrace". Patrick's backstory is actually racist af, fight w the wall.

10. As Lex already said, they didn't trigger tag the ep where Jason and his friends assault Lucas and Erica. Like wtf? Why was that necessary? Why did I have to see a black boy being held at gunpoint by some white guy?? Was it relevant to the plot?? I don't think so. And then I've got to see ppl online be like "Jason wasn't that bad. He was just mourning" like bitch you can stfu. This is what happens when you make the racist assholes conventionally attractive.

Also the fact that Lucas's arc is fulfilled by him fist-fighting Jason and "embracing his weirdness" aka accepting he is black. His arc was not fulfilled at all cuz that ending spoke so loud to me. It showed how little empathy ppl have towards the struggles poc ppl living in the Midwest have. Y'all circle jerks can only see racism when it's super obvious.

Furthermore, parents complained when ST showed "an excessive amount of smoking" yet nobody batted an eye when Billy tried to run over Lucas, when Erica (an 11 y.o ffs) was chased by white kids or when Lucas was held at gunpoint by Jason.

All of this happened while they focused on Max's guilt and mourning that, yeah, are important but certainly not less important than racism!!!

11. In s3, they gave us that whole Nancy vs The Bigots arc that was honestly just triggering and useless. It didn't help Nancy's character at all, quite the opposite it put unnecessary angst.

12. Lonnie being presented as an abuser just for him to never be spoken of again. Can we please get to explore the trauma he left the Byers's with?

13. The fact that both queer relationships are considered "sloppy seconds" is extremely sad. Both Vickie and Mike are rebounding from their failed relationship with Robin and Will. These 2 ships have caused more commotion than Jancy and Jopper together! (These last ships are technically sloppy seconds too but everybody forgets that. Shocker!!)

14. Last but not least, ppl blame Argyle for being the one to get Jonathan into smoking weed as if Jonathan probably wasn't the one looking for it. Let me tell you, that you only find weed if you look for it.

[kafka-ish]

part 1

Patrick asks Art if he got the stuff and how much to which Art replies: yea just an 8th tho and Patrick replies Dude wtf

No dude. You never told me your dealer was hot!!!

Don’t bother. Asked if she’d trade head for half. Wouldn’t budge. Strict business or whatever.

Two seconds later: Still. I’d tap that.

Art decides against telling him about the sample he got. Sticks the joint you rolled in his desk drawer. Does weed have an expiration date? he wonders. He drops by Patrick’s who asks how the deal went. If you gave him a discount for it being his first time and all.

“How much’d she charge?” Patrick wonders aloud, comparing prices in his head, secretly hoping his friend got ripped off.

It takes Art awhile to settle on a number. He still doesn’t know the price of weed. “Like fifty?”

“For an eighth?” Patrick laughs at this like okay this chick is insane and Art realizes he said the wrong thing.

“She said it was the good stuff.” Art shrugs, trying to play it off.

“Whatever man, but you need to learn how to negotiate… So we gonna smoke this shit or what?”

Art begins to make appearances more frequently. But he has to be calculated with how he goes about this. Doesn’t want to seem desperate, hooked on fucking weed. How pathetic. He has to pace himself. At first his visits are periodic. Comes by a few times a month for his regular pick up. But he can’t get enough. Sporadic turns into every other week and every other week turns into Friday nights after his games or if not a tournament, practice. He’s at your door with takeout in hand. Something different every time; he keeps you on your feet and you like the surprise. Tacos, Thai, Lo Mien. Indian when he wins his matches.

You don’t smoke with him at first when he asks, though; you have a rule about smoking up with clients.

“Oh,” he says, feeling defeated. Disappointed that’s how you think of him.

“You still want that eighth?” you ask.

“Um, no. Actually I think I’m gonna go.”

“Art,” you say and the sound of your voice calling his name has him frozen in place. His hand is still on the knob for a moment before it drops, falls by his side. He wipes it on his pants, a habit he has. "Don't do this."

"What? Change my mind?"

"No--"

"You're not trying to peer pressure me, are you?" You wonder if Art's being serious right now. If he's using your methodology of paying tuition and groceries against you. It's your turn to freeze.

"Fine then. Leave. But just so you know I wasn't the one hitting up strangers for weed." You're calm when you say this, only making it harder for Art to reach for the door once more.

Of course, he comes crawling back. Ends up blowing up your phone.

Art: Hey

Art: I'm sorry for what i said the other day. I wasn't thinking. Obviously. It just hurt when u called me a customer. Which i guess i technically am. I dont kno.

Art: I think ur really cool

Art: I guess i just wanted to smoke with someone other than patrick

Art: Did i mention i think ur really cool

You roll your eyes at the thread of messages, how they still come in and your phone can't stop vibrating; you're not finished reading but it keeps pinging. Still, you're smiling. Can't help but read his texts over and over again before responding and you feel a heat on your cheeks when you haven't even lit up.

You text him the same thing when he always texts you after one of his games: My place 9?

"You think I'm cool, huh?" You nudge Art, sitting next to you on the couch. His legs are crossed, facing yours.

Art blushes at the question, the pressure you put him under. Finally musters up the courage to say, “yeah. Really cool.” Then leans in, does that thing that guys do where they grab your jaw, almost caresses it, then brings you in to kiss your lips. It’s soft. Gentle. Thinks he might hurt you if he’s not careful. And he doesn’t linger long but you can taste his chapstick. Mint. You miss him already when his lips leave yours and your tongue sweeps over where flesh once was, itching for another taste.

He sees this. Locks his lips on yours again. Instinct. It's just as quick and sweet as the first one. You feel him grin when his mouth meshes with yours and the sensation of his smile pressing into your cheeks gets you all giddy-like.

“So does that mean you’ll smoke with me?” His smile doesn’t leave when you pull away. And you see his eyebrows are raised while his eyes are blue and bright. A dash of hope shimmers in them and you can see your reflection in them.

“Yeah,” you say, hushed, almost a whisper as if you can’t bring yourself to say it out loud. You’re breaking your rules for him, is what Art’s thinking. And you tell yourself it’s just a one time exception but when he comes over next Friday you find yourself rolling a joint and passing it to him in between kisses.

And now it’s your routine.

He doesn’t need to text you asking for an eighth and you don’t need to tell him what time and place. He just shows up after practice. Of course, you expect him.

“I hope I didn’t get you addicted.”

“Nah.” Art’s lean frame is already hanging on the doorway and he doesn’t come inside immediately when you welcome him in. Instead, he takes you in his arms. They feel stronger each time. Plants a big wet kiss on your lips. And he is addicted. Just not what you think.

[longwuzhere]

My Adventures with Superman Season 2 Easter Eggs

Welcome to another week of My Adventures with Superman! Oh man what a good ep and some fun easter eggs in this one too! Ok lets begin!

My Easter eggs lists for season 1 is here if you haven't seen it!

My season 2 episode 1 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My season 2 episode 2 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My season 2 episode 3 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman comic issue 1 post is here

My season 2 episode 4 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My season 2 episode 5 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My season 2 episode 7 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My Easter eggs and references for My Adventures with Superman comic issue 2 post is here

My season 2 episode 8 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My season 2 episode 9 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My season 2 episode 10 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My Easter eggs and references for My Adventures with Superman comic issue 3 post is here

Spoilers if you haven't seen the episode

Ok so starting things off Superman wakes up from the capture coffin and is immediately like WTF Kara?! He tries to escape the ship he's on but needs a helmet to breathe in space and the suit grants him one. The way it looks really evokes either Injustice 2 Superman's default costume or his Electric Blue Superman look from the comics [Cover art of Superman #123 (1997), the glow in the dark variant cover, by Dan Jurgens, Joe Rubenstein, Patrick Martin, and Todd Klein].

The title of this week's ep is based on Rudyard Kipling's book, The Man Who Would Be King which is about two British adventurers who become kings in Kafiristan. Appropriate for the ep considering Brainiac who wants to flex his strength and might on other planets by sending Kara and his robots to level the entire civilization. How British colonizer of him. Fuck the colonizers.

On Kara's ship, Clark tries to get to know her better and show her that Earth is cool, being kind and gentle is not a weakness, anything to get her away from the whole might makes rights idea and Kara name drops some locations Brainiac and her sacked after seeing some trinkets she stowed away on her ship. The locations are Thanagar, H'lven, and Euphorix. Clark asks Kara to take him to Thanagar where they see that its all just ruins. Later in the ep we learn why. The screenshots of the last two locations are from later on in the ep.

Thanagar makes its first appearance in The Brave and the Bold #34 (1961) [W: Gardner Fox, P&I: Joe Kubert, L: Gaspar Saladino] where Hawkman and Hawkwoman make their first appearance too. They are looking for the criminal Byth Rok. They meet Midway City's commissioner and tell him about their planet and people and explain who Byth Rok is and what he did. Later in the ep we do see a Thanagarian, but I doubt its Shayera/Hawkwoman cuz she would be using a Thanagarian mace not a polearm. Give the latest Hawkman series a read to explore more of not just Hawkman himself but also a look into Thanagar. Also read Batman: Universe if you want to see Batman get humbled by a Thanagarian guard because the guard assumed his cape was wings and Batman says "I can't fly, only glide with the cape" and the guard replies "ha, cute".

H'lven makes its first appearance in Green Lantern #148 (1982) [W: Paul Kupperberg, P: Don Newton, I: Dan Atkins, C: Anthony Tollins, L: John Costanza]. Its a heavily tree covered planet home to Ch'p and B'dg of the Green Lantern Corp (more on the GLC later). It's located in space sector 1014 where the inhabitants are all chipmunk/squirrel-like aliens. So yeah Brainiac destroyed a civilization of adorable anthropomorphic squirrels and chipmunks, what a piece of shit.

The final place Kara mentions and returns to later in the ep is Euphorix where its first appearance was in The Omega Men #2 [W: Roger Slifer (yes that Roger Slifer who Slifer the Sky Dragon from Yugioh was named after), Keith Giffen, P: Keith Giffen, I: Mike DeCarlo, C: Petra Scotese, L:John Costanza]. The silver planet you see in the panel there is one of the last free planets that has not been touched by the Citadel and it is where the Omega Men operate out of.

Kara and Clark have to cut their Thanagar visit short and she mentions that they must return to Kandor which if you know your DC universe is very different to the main satellite/mothership that Brainiac helms.

Unlike what MAwS did with Kandor so far, in the comics, Kandor was a bottled Kryptonian city for trading and commerce that Brainiac stole before Krypton's destruction. It's still populated too. It and Brainiac's first appearance was in Action Comics #242 (1958) [W: Otto Binder P&I: Al Plastino] where Superman was also shrunk down by Brainiac after he stole several cities on Earth and Superman finds Kandor and eventually rescues it. Most of the time the bottled city of Kandor is always seen located in the Fortress of Solitude or its been brought somewhere else to be enlarged to its normal state in different DC continuities. Very smart of the MAwS team to use the name as Brainiacs main transport to keep that Kandor-Brainiac connection and speaking of Brainiac...

Brainiac is, as Kara designates him, Primus Brainiac who I talked more about here. Very smart of the MAwS crew to use the DCAU origins of Brainiac to really make it personal when it comes to Brainiac and Superman. Btw if you've never seen Superman the Animated Series, go watch it its fantastic. It and MAwS are my favorite adaptations of Superman.

Brainiac takes Clark to his combat training chamber where we see a Parademon of Apokolips, a Green Lantern, and a Thanagarian who are just more robots taking on these projected forms of aliens that Brainiac has conquered or battled. I talked a bit about the Thanagarians already but...

Parademons make their first appearance in The New Gods #1 (1971) [W&P: Jack Kirby, I: Vince Colleta, L: John Costanza] as the army troops for Darkseid. They're usually sent out in waves as an advancing force for whatever invasion Darkseid has plans and they swarm like crazy. The New 52 continuity makes them even more horrifying because Parademons are made from living or dead native species the planet the troops are invading and get genetically modified to be additional Parademons for Darkseids army.

As Clark fights the alien monk, we see that they wield a Green Lantern ring so we can presume they are from the Green Lantern Corp. The name Green Lantern was first used in All-American Comics #16 (1940) by Alan Scott who became Green Lantern and his ring was more mystical based compared to how everyone things of the Green Lantern Ring is now which is more sci-fi based.

That Green Lantern was Hal Jordan who gained his ring from a dying Abin Sur who was the protector of space sector 2814, our solar system, and Abin Sur's ring chose Hal to take up the Green Lantern mantle. This is the Green Lantern that pop culture is more familiar with. Any time a Green Lantern Corp member dies, their ring will fly to another person who has the strongest willpower to be a Green Lantern. We can assume that alien monk has their ring fly somewhere to find a new worthy owner. Very cool that the MAwS crew were able to bring a Green Lantern ref in this ep! Also this is how I envision my War Forged monk that I use in DnD fights.

Clark gets swarmed by the robots after beating the three and we see that Brainiac also has a red sun emitter on his craft. I talked more about that Superman weakness here

Kara discovers whats going on between Clark and Brainiac and after a chewing out, Kara goes into a trance like state and wakes up in an empty room. She finds her treasures from Thanagar, Euphorix, and H'lven and that wakes her up. She flies off to those planets again seeing them all in ruins and Thanagar shows that she caused all this. All alone and sad by this discovery in the emptiness of space, Kara sees a blue portal open up and its Lois, Jimmy, Mallah and the Brain from season 1 who I talked more about here and here.

And with that we are at the end. Come back next time to see how Lois and Jimmy meet up with Mallah and the Brain again!

My Easter eggs lists for season 1 is here if you haven't seen it!

My season 2 episode 1 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My season 2 episode 2 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My season 2 episode 3 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman comic issue 1 post is here

My season 2 episode 4 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My season 2 episode 5 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My season 2 episode 7 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My Easter eggs and references for My Adventures with Superman comic issue 2 post is here

My season 2 episode 8 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My season 2 episode 9 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My season 2 episode 10 Easter eggs and references in My Adventures with Superman post is here

My Easter eggs and references for My Adventures with Superman comic issue 3 post is here

[outsidersheadcanons]

can you do the gangs reactions to being called by their full names? <3

Yesss

Darry: He doesn't care. Bro's so busy doing other stuff he wouldn't even notice

Soda: Would probably start laughing. Bc "Sodapop Patrick Curtis" is a funny asf name

Ponyboy: He would assume he was in trouble 😭

Two-bit: Would not register w it at first?? He sometimes forgets his OWN name since no one calls him it. After a second he'd be like "Ohhh you're talking to me?!"

Dilly Dally: On sight 😡 "wtf did you call me?!"

Steve: Would probably bark @ you I think

Johnnycakes: Same reaction as Ponyboy. His parents are the only ones who call him his full name, and it's usually when they're VERY angry with him :(

[periodjosh]

DTS TAKE 🏎️

Just finished DTS and these are my takes on this season.

- season was okay

- they did make some teams look like they’re trash over just one race

- didn’t focus on the “struggling” teams that much, meaning we didn’t really see if they improved or not

- the whole liam situation was honestly fucked

- daniel needs to stop racing … as much as I love him it’s his time to go, I don’t ever think he’s gonna drive for Red Bull anymore. He missed his chance.

- now watching this season, I get why Lewis is leaving, the episode where lewis told us that mercedes said that he was wrong and that they know what they are doing said everything to me.

- I hope mercedes has a downfall next year (but I also love george)

- don’t know why they invited danica patrick to speak, had to skip some of her screen time.

- ferrari fans hating on fred was weird, the whole forza ferrari thing is 😭

- I wished they showed more oscar and his racing season

- HATED seeing danica btw because wtf

- THE WHOLE OTMAR SITUATION?? I’m sorry but that pissed me off, he left mid race weekend?? I would’ve been raging mad

- I’m surprised charles still signed with ferrari, but after this years testing, they may get a championship 🤷🏾‍♀️

- now looking at it, what happened to mercedes, like actually, they’re on thin ice, they were one of the most amazing f1 team and now …

- that’s it !!

[pumpkinsy0]

I didn’t realize how much I yapped to my sister (she use to work at my high school.)UNTIL I started college and had to sit quietly for like three hours straights not talking to anyone. It’s only the first week of school and I’m already going insane by the fact I can’t talk as much anymore.

I am one day away from yapping off my poor desk neighbors ear off. That being said I feel like this is a very Sodapop thing of me to say SOOO!!

HC’s for a Sodapop taking classes at college and comes home talking up a storm since he can’t talk at school very much???

i guess the popnin his name stands for the cork that POPped out his mouth😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

•i think hes outgoing enough to actually enjoy the first day of class and SOMEHOW, the ice breakers that teachers make u do, he tells 3 facts and goes on different tangents for all of em, everyone knew the talker they had in their class in that exact moment

•teachers find him a bit odd bc like,,,he never rlly raises his hand,,,but hes SUPER talkative before and after class,,,y arent u participating king,,

•now we r just gonna assume that steve isnt there bc if he was, soda wouldnt b looking like hes about to explode if he doesnt say one thing, i was joking but its like he has a cork in it fr

•sodas just in his seat touching anything and everything, and everytime something happens that he wants to talk about but he cant, he just looks around and gives someone the eyes

•when he gets home, the main ppl he talks to is steve, pony, and darry and its for different reasons☝🏽☝🏽

•pony, bc pony rlly encouraged him to go to school, so he just feels like he has to, steve, i dont think i gotta explain, theyre bffs, and darry, he didnt want to talk about it w darry bc darry couldnt go but darry told him to tell him about his time there bc hes happy for soda and is glad he went back!!!

•soda isnt even rlly IN a club or whatever, he more so jumps between who he goes to after school cause its pretty big, so ik he has a lot of things to say about the ppl he knows, hes kinda like darry in that aspect

•dont even get him started on if he sees an animal on campus, he’d follow it, keep updates about them for the rest of the school year, even gave em an unoffical name

•when he comes home to talk, its like he has a LIST of things hes specifically tries to remember to talk about, he commonly goes “wait did i tell u about _____”

•dont question sodapop patrick curtis on wtf is going on in his class, he dont even know whats goin on in his class🔥🔥🔥

[7potato7]

So, Xie Lian descends from Heaven without stopping to let Ling Wen get even a single word in. He goes back to doing what he normally does, completely unaware that he just turned literally all of Heaven upside down. He spends several years this way (maybe even decades?? he has an excellent track record hiding from people) but Feng Xin and/or Mu Qing eventually find him and go wtf dude. So, since he's technically a fugitive now (Heaven saw him ascending, destroying everything, then rapidly descending similarly to a terrorist (except terrorism as a term doesn’t exist yet, so the xianxia equivalent ig) attack, oops. Speculation is that he works for Hua Cheng!!! which makes the man himself feel a certain type of way ofc) he flees down the Silk Road and ends up in Rome. He DID spend the time he was still in China (or the territories that would become China, since I'm estimating this at around 0 CE for my own sanity) trying to defeat random ghosts to repay his debt, but quickly realized it was futile.

ofc Feng Xin and Mu Qing now realize that this wasn't a terrorist attack! They already knew that, but Xie Lian's reaction is only proof! They go to Jun Wu, who decides that "Xianle" should be reinstated to his rightful position in Heaven. Yay! Except now they can't find Xie Lian Anywhere. Cue manhunt.

Meanwhile Xie Lian has been enlisted to the Roman army. Which, hey, he'd rather not do that. So he manages to finagle himself into a position on a small northern island which shouldn't see too much conflict. However, this is very much not the case! The Britons relied on the Roman army to defend themselves from the Saxons! So, Xie Lian just deserted and quietly retreated to gather scraps in some forgotten corner of the island. He gets caught in a storm and winds up in Ireland. He's still there when the Romans leave the island in 410 and when St. Patrick comes in 433. Turns out St. Patrick isn't actually an ascended official! How disappointing. For unrelated reasons, Xie Lian returns to Briton, now thoroughly "invaded" (read: culturally integrated) by the Angles and Saxons. He putters around the island for a while longer before heading back to the mainland (read: was exiled to the mainland. For witchcraft. In a boat with rocks in the bottom (very pseudo-historical, as far as I know the 5th century Britons were most definitely not executing people for witchcraft. Witchcraft was a fun hobby they did on the side, not a crime. However, I’d like to see you see someone stand up after being shot in the eye and not throw him in the sea. Yeah, that’s what I thought)).

He hitches up with the Merovingians, who deeply appreciate his rockin' haircut. Clovis (famously brutal and murderous, but then again who isn't), however, Did Not appreciate his ability to walk off a stabbing. Clovis stabs Xie Lian a couple extra times to be sure, then cuts his head off and sets him on fire. It takes Xie Lian about a decade to come back from that, so now it’s 511 and Clovis is dead. Xie Lian decides that he should try some other place on for size.

He ends up in a catholic monastery in Spain. This is where he learns to read Latin, which will later help him learn to read Spanish, French, German, English, you name it. Obviously, he can't pay the entrance fee, so he's a lay brother doing grunt work. He's fine with this. Although he has gathered some knowledge of the local religion, it's not something he can afford to be questioned on (thankfully, literally no peasant ever was educated in the scriptures so he was fine). The atmosphere vaguely reminds him of Mt. Taicang (in literally the vaguest possible sense), and he wonders if this is what Mu Qing had to deal with.

Then the abbot notices he hasn't aged and decides that he's an angel sent by God. Xie Lian decides it's about time for a change of scenery. They've probably forgotten about him in Briton, right?

Unfortunately, he's not that lucky. The abbot isn't willing to let him go that easily, and he and his successors chase him around Spain until 711, at which point they have other problems. Xie Lian reaches Briton and joins another monastery because that was nice. Poverty, chastity, obedience, thy name is Xie Lian!

Fortunately, this monastery is more willing to "overlook" his lack of aging. Unfortunately, this monastery is Lindisfarne, and is destroyed by Vikings in 793. Noticing that Xie Lian doesn't die when killed, the Vikings decide that he's the mortal incarnation of Thor, obviously. They take him with them, fit him out with armor and weapons, and bring him back when they sack Westphalia. He doesn't like killing anyone, but that's fine with them! They're just glad to have the mortal incarnation of... probably not Thor with them! While Xie Lian is still upset that they killed all those monks, he's gotta admit this is the best people have treated him since... his first ascension... ah, shit, he's gotta get out of here. He’s been having too much fun, this was supposed to be penance, mental spiral, etc etc. Maybe just in a bit, though.

They keep asking him to stay just a bit longer, kill just one more sea monster, please, your holiness, until suddenly it's 911 and Rollo is sacking what will become Normandy. When the French king gives it to them as a "please stop, thanks," Xie Lian goes there with Rollo. Then he leaves. The newly dubbed Normans are sad, of course, but they can't keep holding their god back! In reality, Xie Lian is worried that his bad luck is going to catch up to him.

For a while, he falls back into his scrap collecting ways -except, it isn't as easy in medieval Europe. They live in small, insular communities that don't much like strangers. So he eventually decides to just... hide in the woods.

At this point, Feng Xin and Mu Qing have obviously realized that Xie Lian isn't in China anymore (if you're wondering how it took that long, it's because they got distracted by the Warring States Period and the trail went cold). So they follow legends of a strange looking man who didn't die when stabbed to Spain. However, Xie Lian isn't in Spain. He's in the part of the world that will eventually become Germany, trying to avoid being pressed into a Crusade. Yes, it is already 1096. Keep up.

He does end up going on the Crusade as a cook. That lasts a day before they decide to throw him on the frontlines to "soften up the Moors." Xie Lian fakes his death. I could choose a specific battle, but I don't particularly care to. It was probably Antioch. Fine, it was Antioch.

He spends some time in the Byzantine Empire, which is rapidly crumbling. He flees after the Sack of Constantinople in 1204, thankfully with only minimal injuries this time. But on his way out, he briefly sees Feng Xin and Mu Qing in the chaos, fighting on the side of the Byzantine Empire. They also see him, but he leaves before they can do anything about it.

So Xie Lian fucks off to a random island in the Mediterranean. This ends up being the Island of Rhodes. He stays there doing his little scrap collecting do da until 1306, when the Hospitallers move in. Shortly after that, they themselves are booted off to Malta in another invasion. Xie Lian goes with them, bc what the hell, these guys kinda suck, they deserve the bad luck.

Xie Lian is still in Malta when the Black Plague hits in 1349. It... brings some old wounds back up to the surface. Best to just forget about it. He sticks around, anyways.

The Inquisition begins in 1478. The Hospitallers start to give him funny looks. However, he is widely viewed as a living saint, so they don’t really do anything. Xie Lian fakes his death, then barricades himself into a cave and meditates for around fifty years before coming back out. No one recognizes him. He does this a couple more times, with varying lengths of meditation. He should probably just move on, but it’s awfully difficult to get on and off Malta. Also, it’s kind of nice there.

In 1565, Xie Lian almost single-handedly holds off the siege of Malta with the aid of the inhabitants while the Hospitallers cower in their monastery. Really, these monk guys have gone downhill over the centuries. Of course, the Hospitallers and Ottomans rewrite the narrative, but who would expect any less? The truth is just embarrassing for everyone involved.

In a rare stroke of luck, Xie Lian leaves the island after the siege. Just a few short years later, in 1573, the Inquisition moves in.

It is now 1615. Xie Lian is very tired. He returns to the mainland after the siege, and now everyone is fighting over something called "indulgences." He wants to go home. He does go home! Jun Wu finds him immediately, oops. He'd been watching Mt. Taicang (insane behavior, it's been 2,000 years bro) and obviously noticed when Xie Lian went to pay respects to his parents. Xie Lian narrowly escapes and runs as far as he possibly can. Your pick whether it’s just because of the stalker-ish behavior or a Bai Wuxiang reveal. Either way, he runs all the way to the New World.

Of course, he doesn’t have the money to just... book a ship there. He signs on as an indentured servant. What are a few years off his life anyways? Unfortunately, before that can happen, he gets mugged and accidentally murders the guy. Instead of being an indentured servant in exchange for land, he is instead working off his debt to the guy's family. Which is fine, of course.

It's not, in fact, fine. After his service is done, he once more fucks off to the woods. At this point, however, most Native Americans know to be wary of foreigners, so he keeps to himself. If he gets shot by mistake a few times, it's fine, he shakes it off. At least they aren't guns. In most cases. He'll take what he can get.

He finds a cave. He meditates in the cave. He doesn't come out until 1850. It's almost being in the coffin again, except he can leave anytime. He just. Doesn't.

The shackle around his neck cracks slightly under the force of spiritual power he’s cultivated. He doesn’t notice.

The world of 1850 is very different than the world of 1650. Manifest Destiny is real and thriving. Suddenly the relatively friendly local tribes have been replaced by a bunch of other, less friendly people. The mountain used to be called Maskwa Wac, but now it’s Bear Mountain and Xie Lian is in Connecticut, apparently??? Mostly people call him strange names when he tries to ask questions, so he avoids them.

He isn’t used to people anymore. They aren’t exactly willing to get used to him, either. Centuries of dirt don’t wash out with a single bath. After two centuries in a cave, he has to relearn how to talk, write, and generally interact with the world. Culture has changed, language has changed, the entire world has changed. Xie Lian is exactly the same.

In 1863, Xie Lian finally manages to get a job. It’s gotten significantly harder to live without a job, so that’s good (maybe he should invest in this newfangled “identification” thing). Building the trans-continental railroad is a great gig for someone like Xie Lian. He’s strong and more than willing to work. The pay isn’t bad.

Unfortunately, some boulders fall on him after a misplaced TNT blast and his coworkers leave him for dead. But hey, hadn’t he heard of something called a “Gold Rush” talked about nostalgically in bars? He’s pretty sure it’s over now, but it’s worth a shot. He’s already partway there.

He only gets mauled by like three bears on the way over. It was good that he’d seen a few before at that point, or else he’d probably think they were yao. He also got shot several more times, whether by Native Americans or settlers.

The people out West hadn’t gotten a forty-niner in decades, but they’re willing to give him odd jobs mopping at bars and fixing fences and such. It’s almost nostalgic. They hear news about the South seceding and the war that follows, but it isn’t something that really affects them all the way out here. Xie Lian is glad to avoid it.

After only a couple years, he decides to go back to the East Coast. He doesn’t want to bring bad luck on these people’s heads, after all. He accidentally zig-zags down into Mexico and into South America, then overcompensates back up into Canada before finally making it to New York City.

It’s 1910. Almost the moment he steps foot in the city, he gets hit by a car. Somewhat delirious, he mistakes the car for a demon(?) and tries to kill it.

Insane asylums are not fun.

The important part is that he eventually gets out (or that’s what he tells himself). He doesn’t have the motivation to bother with a job anymore, so he bums it on the streets collecting scraps like he used to. Problem is, there’s a lot more homeless people in the post-Industrial world than the pre-Industrial one. Lots of competition for food and shelter. Usually, if it comes to a fight, Xie Lian just lets the other guy have whatever it is. It’s not like it’s life or death for Xie Lian, after all.

He gets picked up by the police, who aren’t so bad yet. Corrupt, yes, but this isn’t the Gilded Age anymore. They drop him off with a referral to work in a car factory (Xie Lian didn’t know whether to laugh or cry) and only a few bruises.

Machinery, ah... it tends to... break around him. He doesn’t last long at his new job. Neither does his job last long with him as an employee. The factory burns down. The owner has Xie Lian dropped in a river with rocks tied to his ankles. What goes around comes around, really.

In 1917, Xie Lian is drafted into WWI. So, of course, he ends up in the trenches. He’s just glad that he’s basically immune to every disease known to man. Most of his comrades aren’t so lucky.

This isn’t the type of war Xie Lian remembers fighting in -though his memories are a bit blurry at this point. They fight for inches of ground in exchange for hundreds of lives in muddy, dismal conditions. The mud kills almost more than the bombs do.

The despair is the same. That much never changes.

Xie Lian leaves. He had to. No amount of martial prowess could help stop this war. Perhaps strategy would, but even if they let some random soldier into the war room, Xie Lian wouldn’t know how to strategize with modern guns, let alone tear gas.

Feng Xin and Mu Qing are still looking for Xie Lian, of course. But the trail went cold years ago.

Hua Cheng is holding on to his existence by his fingernails these days. He’s expanded his influence globally, but he still can’t find His Highness anywhere. Ghosts everywhere tread on eggshells. In one night, he replaces every single carving and painting of Jesus in Europe with one of Xie Lian. The papacy is in an uproar, taking it as a sign from God Himself. The only person who doesn’t find it funny is Xie Lian, who is very confused. Also white supremacists. They don’t like it very much either (that just makes it funnier). It turns out that Xie Lian has been canonized as a saint a few separate times over the centuries. “His bones”/relics are in six separate churches. People start freaking out. A large portion of the Catholic church believes that Xie Lian is either Jesus (and that the rapture had already happened centuries ago) or the Antichrist. This causes a massive schism in Protestant and Catholic churches alike. Islam becomes the main Abrahamic religion. Xie Lian does his level best to ignore the people bowing to him in the streets and shaves his hair off with a bowie knife.

On another note, Jun Wu gave up on finding Xie Lian centuries ago. Turns out Xianle was just a spot of mud on his Heavenly canvas after all.

This is good. It means when Xie Lian sprints his way back across the world, Jun Wu isn’t watching Mt. Taicang anymore. Xie Lian, still a martial god, makes it there in a week at top speed. However, Mt. Taicang isn’t the same as it used to be. There’s a fence around the base, and big fancy houses everywhere. When Xie Lian touches the fence, it shocks him as if he’s been struck by lightning and he blacks out for a second. His first thought is that it’s some type of array (that some other cultivation sect has set up there, an optimistic voice whispers deep in his heart), but it’s just an electric fence of course. He climbs over.

His parents’ well is full of cement.

Xie Lian returns to the trenches. He was only gone for three weeks. His excuse is that there was a messed-up transfer. No one believes him, so he gets court martialed for desertion. It doesn’t go through. If he’d deserted, why would he ever go back to the trenches?

Eventually, he goes back to America. It was the furthest he could possibly get from his problems, after all.

It’s nice to be able to write “homeless veteran” on his signs. The police bother him less. Well, slightly less. People keep saying the economy is bad, but it’s always been bad for Xie Lian. He barely notices the differences anymore. He barely notices anything.

Then another war starts. Eventually, in 1942, Xie Lian is picked up and thrown into an internment camp. He isn’t Japanese, but he can’t exactly say he’s from Xianle, a long dead country no one has ever heard of. This is actually a massive turn in luck, because he meets Banyue and Pei Xiu in the camp. They’ve also been mistaken for Japanese, because that’s what a... misinformed forger put on their green cards when they got off Angel Island.

They all got out in 1946. Pei Xiu manages to get a low-paying job, but Banyue struggles to find work for her skillset (snakes) and Xie Lian still doesn’t have any identification. Pei Xiu quickly loses his job, and they all end up homeless again.

They’re at Stonewall when the riots start in 1969. The first brick was thrown by Marsha P. Johnson, the second by Sylvia Rivera, and the third by Shi Qingxuan, who now goes by Shi Xuan. They’ve had a bit of a rough time of it over the centuries since his brother was killed and they were knocked from Heaven, even losing an arm and leg, but they were kept immortal by her Ghost King. They don’t ever talk to each other, but Shi Xuan knows he’s watching. How else is she still alive? (If she keeps his camps close to waterfronts... well, that’s just their preference. Nothing to do with the head she can sometimes spy poking over the waves).

Shi Xuan recognizes Pei Xiu, but he recognizes nothing of the once-glorious Wind Master in them. She hits it off with Xie Lian and joins their group.

Technology is changing. Everything in the world is closer than it used to be. Privacy is quickly becoming a non-concept, especially for homeless people. There are cameras everywhere. Xie Lian, Banyue, Pei Xiu, and Shi Xuan don’t have access to this sort of technology.

Jun Wu, Feng Xin, Mu Qing, and Hua Cheng do. In 2003, a video of a homeless man telling a police officer off goes viral on LiveJournal and MySpace. On a completely unrelated note, several immortals show up in various American cities. Jun Wu is contemplating moving the Heavenly Court. Scientists are calling the sudden outburst of silver butterflies an invasive species.

It’s 2005, and Xie Lian hops onto the subway. It has been 2,803 years since he was banished. In an empty subway car, he meets a Ghost King in red.

[earlgreytea68]

Speaking of first impressions I was just watching this interview the other day (https:// youtu .be /uqUQxzn55Z8?feature=shared) and the way when they're asked about their musical influences Patrick is sheepishly like I was a fan of [Pete's] old band....... I'm just screaming thinking about it bc obviously if you're a teenage Patrick Stump navigating the Chicago hardcore scene there's no way you DIDN'T have a huge embarrassing crush on Pete of arma angelus and then suddenly this random guy you meet in a bookstore tells you he knows Pete Wentz and THEN he actually brings Pete Wentz to your HOUSE and you're trying to think about how short he is to distract yourself from how hot he is and then Pete demands that you sing for him even though you never once in your life thought of yourself as a singer but like this hot guy from a band you like is in your basement so wtf are you gonna do??????? And now suddenly you're the lead singer of his band 😭😭😭😭😭😭

RIGHT????? LIKE, HOW DID THIS ALL HAPPEN????? HOW IS IT NOT SOMETHING FICTIONAL????? SOMETHING MADE UP IN A FEVER DREAM??????

AND THEN.

The Hot and Cool Pete Wentz from Arma Angelus says he wants you to be his singer, but, like, clearly he doesn't really mean it, right? Like, any minute now he's going to come to his senses and realize you're a loser and he can do much better than you and this is a joke band and it means nothing to him and he's totally going to just move on and forget all about you so you'd better not get used to having Pete Wentz around, right???? You'd better keep all the best songs for yourself and not just hand them over to this dude who's totally going to ditch this band and walk out of your life and break your heart. Like, no way is Pete Wentz going to keep looking at you like that and quit every other band to focus on yours and promise that you're going to conquer the world together and call you his golden ticket and give you all of his words and just never let you go.

No way is that ever going to happen.

[itsawritblr]

"How was the writers conference?"

As always, based on actual events. Yes, I'm a middle-aged WOC, but Patrick Melrose gifs fit alarmingly well. Just switch sexes in your mind.

My best friend when she learned I'd signed up for yet another 3-day writers conference, "after the ordeal of the last one." (unmute)

DAY 1

Me pretending I can actually afford it when the hotel Reception Desk informed me that because I didn't make a reservation -- LIKE I SHOULD HAVE DONE A MONTH AGO -- my only choice of room is "upgraded," meaning "WAY more expensive."

Talking shop with someone who really doesn't give a fuck.

God bless upgraded-room bathtubs.

First panel is before breakfast with no coffee and what moron thought this was a good idea?

Running into an editor from a periodical who still hasn't paid me for my short story and asking her when can I expect to be paid.

The Fancy Meal with the Movers And Shakers.

Inside joke nobody got.

The ex who isn't even a writer, so WTF was he doing there? (yes, switch sexes).

DAY 2

The lunch to woo a new literary agent.

Her very professional answer.

Those two authors who should: 1. Never drink in public 2. Never attend the same con

The Elephant In the Room nobody was going to talk about, so of course everyone was talking about it.

DAY 3

Manuscript Evaluation: The would-be author who was "open to constructive criticism" but absolutely lied.

Check out time!

And there go the savings!

"And how was the conference?"

THE END

Another gif post about attending a writers conference.

Yes, I adore fancy hotel bathrooms. You should try them some day. And leave a whomping great tip for the housekeeper. I used to be one; I know how hard it is to scrub out those fucking tubs.

Also, don't submit to Cricket Media LLC. The fuckers don't pay.

Also, my literary agent did retire, but the one I spoke with is definitely interested in seeing my novel when it's finished. Another agent also wants to see it. I've given myself the deadline of September 24 to have a readable manuscript completed.

Off to write like a muthafucker now. See ya in September.

[zweiginator]

https://www.tumblr.com/zweiginator/757373921399111680/need-to-be-long-term-with-frat-art-like-maybe

wtf☹️ lets fuck patrick

getting back at art because you didn't know it was possible for anyone to break your heart as bad as he did. it was just a coffee date but he fucking said i love you and now you're in the dark in your room, just thinking about what was and what could have been.

you block his number. this isn't the first time you've done it, but it's the longest you've stuck to your word. and art tries to corner you in the chemistry building, he sends you email after email, uses friends' phones to text and call you.

but you don't answer his pleas for forgiveness, his promises that it was nothing.

instead, you go to a different frat that weekend, with the intent of hooking up with somebody--anybody to get your mind off art.

and it's easier than you anticipate; as soon as you've downed a lukewarm vodka lemonade, a tall brunette taps on your shoulder. he has broad shoulders and slurred words and pretty green eyes. he will do.

so you stumble to his room. he introduces himself and you nod but don't tell him your own name. no need. he's half dragging you up the stairs and then you're pushing him down on his bed and yanking his pants down his legs.

patrick cups your hallowed cheeks as you suck him into your mouth. he compliments your eyes, the flutter of your eyelashes, how good the inside of your mouth feels. how he wants to feel more of you.

so you let him. it's rough and quick; his hips snap against your ass and he covers your mouth. it feels good, but your feelings are numb. he cums and flips his lights on to find a dirty shirt to clean up with.

there on his nightstand is a framed photo of him and art.