#WHY UNKNOWN AUTHOR OF THE PODCAST

[the-one-and-only-duckduckgo]

Heyyyy how's tma going?

Just finished reading episode 12, planning to read more tomorrow after exposing. Going nicely, thanks for asking!

(It was, in fact, not going nicely. At the minute when our brave antihero spoke, ze was holding onto zir last bits of sanity, doing anything to avoid crying because of Gerard Keay's reappearance. )

[placedupon]

I'm fully on board with criticizing people who say China is evil and bad – it's propaganda. But can you recommend any good reading on why China is actually an important leftist project and not more imperial state capitalism? This is the critique I hear from my Western left bubble, but I don't feel thoroughly educated on this and am receptive to alternative arguments.

Thanks and sorry for posting from my weird kink alt – it's the one that's on my phone and I can't sleep. 🌻

For the specific question you're asking, I think the works of Mobo Gao are the best, but I'll also include some books about the Chinese revolution because I believe they provide some critical context. Of course these recommendations will be in English, because I'm not good enough at reading Chinese to understand Chinese texts (working on it!)

The Battle for China's Past: Mao & the Cultural Revolution by Mobo Gao deconstructs a lot of the sinophobia and anti-communism in the way the west (and many Chinese people) view the cultural revolution. In a similar vein, The Unknown Cultural Revolution: Life and Change in a Chinese Village by Dongping Han is about the authors village and how the cultural revolution & communism was able to empower previously downtrodden peasants.

Constructing China: Clashing views of the People's Republic by Mobo Gao is more about modern perceptions of Chinese people, and how sinophobia is produced on a global scale. Very important text.

On a more historical side, I think the works of Han Suyin are essential: she was one of the only english writers who spoke positively about China (and lived in China!) during the communist revolution. Her autobiographies, starting with A Mortal Flower gave me a lot of insight into many critical events in Chinese history.

She also wrote biographies which were heavily researched. I'm currently reading Wind in the Tower: Mao Tsetung and the Chinese Revolution. She was also friends with Zhou Enlai, and wrote a book about him titled Eldest Son: Zhou Enlai and the Making of Modern China, which I've heard very good things about.

In terms of modern writers who are fighting against Sinophobia right now, Vijay Prashad is incredible. The Qiao Collective has many good articles about China. The podcast Decolonized Buffalo has some great episodes about Chinese history and modern anti-communism.

If I think of more recommendations I'll add them later.

[secretmellowblog]

Okay, here are some random panels I’m personally looking forward to at the online Les mis convention Barricadescon starting tomorrow!! (note that this off the top of my head, and they’re in no particular order, and that I am excited for all of em.)

(Also note that it’s the last day to register, which you can do on their site here. You can also see the full program of all the panels/their descriptions here.)

1. I’ll say any of the Guests of Honor (Jean Baptiste Hugo, the descendant of Hugo will be talking about his project photographing his ancestor’s house; Christina Soontornvat, author of the award-winning Les Mis retelling “A Wish in the Dark;” and Luciano Muriel, playwright of a 2018 play about Grantaire.)

2. @psalm22-6 ‘s panel “Early Transformative Works,” which is about the earliest Les Mis retellings, parodies, and “fanfics” from the 1800s/early 20th century. They’ve shared deeply cursed sneak peeks with me. Apparently in 1863 a man wrote a “proper Christian” retelling of Les Mis where Javert is reimagined as a proper Christian woman following poor criminals around giving them charity while they keep rejecting her kindness. Powerful. Javert as Mary Sue. (Note that I may be explaining poorly because I haven’t seen the panel yet.

3. History podcaster David Montgomery’s panel “The Yellow Passport: Surveillance and Control in 19th Century France,” which dives into the role of the police and strategies of government surveillance at the time Les Mis is set!

4. My own panel “Why Is There a Roller Coaster in Les Mis,” which I shared the first five minutes of here. There’s an actual scene in Les Mis where Fantine rides a roller coaster so I made a full defunctland video on how that roller coaster got to Paris in 1817, the fascinating historical context behind early roller coasters, and why it became defunct.

5. @thecandlesticksfromlesmis ‘s panel “Beat for Beat,” analyzing the script of Les Mis 2012 and contrasting it with the book and musical. Discussion of 2012 is almost overwhelmingly always about its music or cinematography, and I’m fascinated to hear someone finally analyzing the screenplay/ structural changes.

6. Morbidly curious for “Lee’s Miserables,” the academic panel discussing the paradoxical popularity of a censored version Les Mis in the Confederate South (with all the references to the evils of slavery carefully removed of course)

7. “Barricades as a Tactic,” a panel discussing how barricades actually functioned as a tool of warfare historically and the echoes of them in the modern day.

8. All the little social meetups, including the Preliminary Gaieties drinking game!

9. I’m biased because I’m also helping present this one, but the @lesmisletters panel (on the Dracula-daily inspired Les Mis readalong happening now.)

10. “The Fallibility of History in Les Miserables,” by @syrupsyche. It’s a panel analyzing the way Hugo often treats Les mis as a story that he learned about through research/gossip, rather than a fictional narrative— analyzing where Hugo does that in the text and what it means thematically.

11. The Unknown Light Examined, by Madeleine— a panel analyzing the chapter where the Bishop confronts the elderly revolutionary, and is forced to re examine his political beliefs! An iconic chapter, and the abstract is very compelling.

But also a lot more, check out the exhaustive list here XD. And also register at this link!

[riverfortune]

Look. Look. Tumblr. I am not good at convincing people to do things, but I desperately need to peer pressure some of you into reading this book series.

It's called Stealing From Wizards by R.A. Consell and it's delightful, well-written, engaging, and criminally unknown. I've had such a fun time reading the series. I don't know why it isn't doing numbers of Tumblr.

If you were a Harry Potter Kid who grew up and became, shall we say, disenchanted with that series but you still have a soft spot for wizard boarding school stories, you should read Stealing From Wizards.

If you like children's books but you'd like to see actual competent and empathetic adults in the children's lives (without taking the narrative drive away from the young protagonist!), you should read Stealing From Wizards.

If you want a story with a plucky young protagonist who's learning how to be a person for the first time after leaving an abusive home life, you should read Stealing From Wizards.

If you only have $8 to your name you can probably still buy all three ebooks on Amazon so you should read Stealing From Wizards.

If you're completely broke you can listen to the audiobook. for free. on the AUTHOR'S WEBSITE. (Or Spotify, Audible, Apple Podcasts or whatever your podcast player or choice is.) Go download Stealing From Wizards.

If you are a child 8-14 years old, or you make reading choices for a child of 8-14 years old, or you're a grown-up who likes children's stories when they're well-written and engaging because gosh dang it you just want to see some joy in the world and you want a story that will engage you but leave you with hope at the end and why is that so hard to find in adult fiction these days anyway? you should read Stealing From Wizards.

Did you like The Owl House? You should read Stealing From Wizards.

Percy Jackson fan? Try Stealing From Wizards.

Murderbot Diaries fan? Ok, that one's a bit more of a stretch but the possible autism-coding and the how do I be a person when I was built different? thing is the same. Try Stealing From Wizards.

Avatar: The Last Airbender fan? You might like Stealing From Wizards.

Found family fan? Stealing From Wizards.

You want a book that multiple reviewers couldn't put down? Stealing From Wizards.

You want brown characters, gay characters, disabled characters? Stealing From Wizards.

You want a fantasy story set in Canada/Fey Canada? Stealing From Wizards.

There are three books out so far: Stealing From Wizards Volume 1: Pickpocketing, Stealing From Wizards Volume 2: Burglary, and Stealing From Wizards Volume 3: Kidnapping are out so far, and it seem like there will be more.

I hope there will be more.

I am writing this so more of you will buy the books to make sure the author writes more.

The cover art is trash. The marketing seems to be nonexistent. I'm not even sure you can buy physical copies in stores or if they're printed to order. But this series just makes me really happy and I want someone else to read it.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk listening to me ramble.

(Go read Stealing From Wizards.)

[theycallmebecca]

Drabble: Smooth Hips Turner Gets Caught

Here is the promised follow up to my drabble Smooth Hips Turner. I did a poll a couple weeks ago to determine what the plot should be and almost half of the votes were for her brother to find out about them dating.

I'm not a drama writer... I'm a romantic comedy writer... so I had some fun.

I'm also checking off a couple squares on my @the-slumberparty bingo card: Sports AU and Night Club.

Title: Smooth Hips Turner Gets Caught

Pairing: hockey player!Cole Turner x female reader

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: language

Disclaimer: This work of fiction is not to be reposted, used or translated without my permission.

Usage Disclaimer: This work is for fans only. This author does not give permission for it to be shared, spoken of, referred to in any public manner (podcast, tv, online, etc.) that wants to either make a celebrity uncomfortable, mock fan fiction/fandom in any way, or the author themselves. Requests can be made, but it is unlikely the author will change their mind. If no response is given to a request then the answer is a solid no, not interested and the work cannot be shared, spoken of or even referred to, regardless of the manner or context. 

IS SMOOTH HIPS TURNER IS OFF THE MARKET?? The superstar goalie was seen canoodling at a local club with an unknown female while out with friends over the weekend. Our body language expert looked at the photos and said the relationship looks serious and predicts that there will be wedding bells in the off season for the pro.

"Fuck," Cole cursed as he looked at the social media post.

"All my social media accounts were already private," you reminded him. "And I changed all my profile pictures to the beach as soon as I saw that post."

"Someone will recognize you though and sell your name and any dirt they have on you to the tabloids," he sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "Fuck. Your brother."

"Excuse me?" you asked with a laugh.

"Not literally fuck your brother," Cole replied with a grin. "But fuck, I wanted to tell your brother myself. But if he sees those photos, he's going to know."

Before you could respond, Cole's phone dinged and he glanced down at it, his eyes going wide as he looked at the message. Swallowing, he turned it towards you so you could see the message that had come in from your brother.

YOU'RE SLEEPING WITH MY SISTER????

CALL ME THE FUCK RIGHT NOW!

"I'll call him," you offered. "And I'll tell him to mind his own fucking business."

"No," Cole said, shaking his head. "I have to do this. I should have done it before now."

"You aren't having this conversation without me," you told him. "I get that he is your best friend, but he's my brother. And I get that he's my brother, but you're my boyfriend. You are not excluding me from this!"

"Alright, alright," Cole said, holding up his hands. "I'll call him now."

He sat down next to you on the couch and chose to video call your brother.

You weren't sure what to expect when your brother answered, but based on his text to Cole you weren't expecting the shit eating grin you got.

"Turner. Sis." He greeted you both. Then, to Cole, said, "So you finally grew a pair and asked her out, huh?"

It took a second for you and Cole to figure out what he meant by that but you started laughing while Cole just stared back at him in shock.

"Oh don't pretend to be shocked I knew," your brother told him. "You were fucking obvious, man. It was a relief when she went away to school because you weren't distracted all the time if she was home."

"You knew the whole time?" Cole asked, dumbfounded. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"Uh, because it was my sister," your brother replied. "I wasn't going to encourage that when you didn't stand a chance with her. And after, well you lived in two different places and lived very different lives."

"So you aren't mad?" you asked him.

"That you guys are dating? Absolutely not," he replied. "I am annoyed that I found out from the fucking internet though!"

"It's not how we wanted you to find out," Cole said. "I was going to talk to you next week when my team was in town."

"You were?" you said, looking at Cole.

"I was," he replied, looking back at you.

Smiling, you leaned in and kissed him.

"OH YUCK! GROSS!" your brother complained. "Just because I'm ok with it doesn't mean I want to see it!"

"Say bye to your brother," Cole told you, pulling his lips away from yours.

"Bye, butt head," you called.

Your brother was still protesting when Cole ended the call and dropped the phone onto the floor.

[semi-sketchy]

For an update (mostly) meant to flesh out the Ancients/The End, they still seem not all that memorable or compelling from what little I've seen. They're just as much as plot devices masquerading as (bland) characters as Sage still is. The plot EXPECTS me to care, but I just cannot because the lore/exposition in this game is soooo dull when it's not wholly confusing. And I gotta ask, is any of it gonna matter in future games? Does anyone really approve of this shite whilst still bemoaning how unnecessarily convoluted Shadow's backstory was? That for a supposed big threat, it all still took place on some small-scale remote islands? This stuff should begging for a retcon. Guess that'll be up to me. Hint: Fairy dust made it all seem real to both the heroes and Eggman. And the Kocos are Accidental Antagonists to have put them through all of it because they don't remember their true history on the islands...

The question of which ending is canon is up for debate, but personally I think this one is going to cause more problems long-term. I literally started yelling at the side story when Sage said the Ancients had satellites that are still functional.

Tens of thousands of years old, still orbiting, functional, and NO ONE HAS NOTICED THEM? This is the world that had a SPACE COLONY 50 YEARS AGO and they NEVER asked what these old satellites were?? Like man, if we discovered ancient satellites circling our planet, there would be some paranormal podcasts talking about this "unknown" and obscure fact, but here no one has noticed?

Also extremely disappointed they did nothing to expand on The End. If anything, this is regression from base game because it's missing that pretentious speech. I wanted to know WHY this consumer of worlds was specifically chasing the Ancients. If it's just supposed to be symbolic, then that was completely lost on me.

I'm with you on the not being able to care part. I'm not bonded to these characters and the short cutscenes around the trials doesn't change anything about the pilots. It's just "WE DIED TO CONTAIN THIS THING AND YOU SET IT FREE-- oh you passed my brute strength trial. K guess you're a good guy." Sonic gets some sass with the King Koco, but it also feels...off. It's not his normal disrespect towards authority.

To go on another tangent, the opening cutscene bothers me.

Sonic isn't the person to give a "rally the troops" speech. Although, how this scene was written made that direction the ONLY way it could've gone.

I think of the Last Story cutscene from Heroes. Sonic just listens.

When he says he'll fight Metal Overlord, it's Tails and Knuckles that pop up to say "we're going to help you!" and Shadow that says they'll buy them time.

Sonic doesn't ask anything from anybody, he just graciously accepts their help. Compare how this was written to sticking Sonic in a place where he's the one who has to explain what's going on and tell others what he needs.

It's a case where the plot moves the characters and not the characters moving the plot, which is the perfect storm for OOC moments. That is exactly what happened with Eggman when they decided Sage was a good idea.

Sage just regurgitates random info about rocks and other stuff no one asked about, like there was ONE LINE where she sounded kinda different which made me think it would've been so good if Sage was more like GLaDOS. I want her to have more sick burns. But no, innocent child because Eggman "needs" a daughter and Sonic has to have a reason to help the girl that's been trying to kill him the whole game.

I don't understand how anyone can call this "peak" because it's just so self-important and straight-faced serious, it's at the point of monotony. It breaks what I like about these characters to wrap them up in a "serious story" blanket whilst failing to properly build up the threat.

I hope they reevaluate their choices and this isn't really the standard moving forward because it's so stupid it hurts. And that's just the story/lore.

[amaya-writes]

Death Note spoilers!

For the event, can I request reborn!L Lawliet? He died in 2007, so he would be 15 today, so I just wanted some fluff with teen!reader (platonic or romantic, whatever) maybe being friends from school and liking true crime, chatting, just doing normal teen stuff without a care in the world :') thank you so much

Event Masterlist About The Event

Notes: I was going to make this romantic but ran out of ideas lol

Warnings: n/a

Characters involved: L Lawliet, mentions Watari

Gender-neutral reader, you/yours

You had been friends with L ever since you saw him win a middle school dodgeball match by using physics.

You thought he was one of the coolest people you knew. He thought you were annoying.

L Lawliet wasn't exactly the type of teenager people would talk about. His real name was Ryuzaki but for some reason unknown to most he had decided to be referred to as L sometime during elementary school, a decision everyone seemed to automatically accept.

He was quiet and went about his days at school perched on his seat at the back of the class with his owlish eyes observing everyone around him.

Everyone thought he was weird. Even the teachers.

The only reason they never said anything was because of how awfully smart he was.

You prided yourself on being one of the top students in your class. But that was before L came along.

You might have been smart, but he was on another level.

Perhaps that was why you had originally been so vexed by him. Him and his stupid sliver tongue and quick reflexes that ensured even if he was regarded as an outcast, no one could ever ridicule him for it.

Especially not when he came from such a rich family.

You heard rumours about how he had a butler who would follow him around wherever he went. And how that butler was responsible for the chemistry teacher's sudden disappearance a week after she dared to mark L's answer wrong.

The second part was obviously a lie. But you found that it was enough to intrigue you even more.

In the end, it was your love for true crime that brought the two of you together.

There was a famous detective known for his books about the serial killers cases he had handled in your country who had a book signing in your city, and you just had to go.

As luck would have you found a familiar raven-haired boy standing outside the bookstore just as you arrived.

At first, you thought he would avoid you. But that was before he dropped by your table after the book signing to cheekily impose on your reading.

"He was never imprisoned."

"What?"

L took your question as an invitation to occupy the vacant seat across from you.

"The killer. He was a politician who got away with it just because his party refused to believe he could ever do such a thing."

The two of you were quick to share your sentiments about how awful that was, and before you knew it, a simple talk about a book both of you adored turned into reading recommendations and swapping social media.

Apparently, L had only downloaded Tiktok and Instagram to watch videos about the cases he liked to keep up with but actively spent time tweeting about all sorts of things.

You thought the two of you would be restricted to discussions outside of school after that but were pleasantly mistaken the next day when you found L excitedly leaning against your locker ready to talk about how your favourite author had announced they were going to do a podcast.

The two of you became quick friends after that.

It started with both of you reading together and listening to true crime but quickly turned into L tugging you along to a million bakeries and forcing you to play chess with him in exchange for long walks through the park and shopping sprees.

You learned the reason he wanted to be called L was that his late mother had named him Ryuzaki, and he seemed to hold a grudge against everything related to her. He learned about your struggles with perfectionism and need to be the trophy child of your family.

You loved fashion almost as much as he didn't, and he held an interest in all the sports you had never once bothered to learn.

The two of you were different yet somehow still so awfully alike.

It helped that you both lacked any artistic abilities whatsoever. Whether it be dancing, singing, or art.

That was where your other friend came in.

Unlike L who didn't have any friends before you, you had secured a tight-knit but fun group of friends you cared for deeply. One of them was a digital artist who had even gone viral on Tiktok, the other an aspiring doctor who was secretly a theatre kid.

You were acquainted with a few others too, but L preferred to stick around you or the other two.

Everyone else seemed to be glad that you were helping L come out of his shell.

The two of you quickly turned from the peculiar pair everyone would gossip about to normal best friends, and over time people began to stare more when you weren't accompanied by one another.

You cared for each other deeply and would often spend hours on end holed up in L's ridiculously large bedroom as you did everything from reading to studying to watching bad comedy horror movies.

One school year turned into another, and you soon began to think of L as someone you would be friends with forever.

[bittersweet-folder]

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

2: I wonder who would it be, hmmmmm my online friends and Tumblr mutuals . I mean there aren't much people ik tbh. OH AND my favorite bands- signed copies of albums would be so good to have 😭😭 I want some from my favorite bands 😭 and yess few authors too because why not 😭 and get my favorite book by them signed. I'll be so freaking happy 😭. (I sound like a crazy fangirl)

15: I am the photographer soo behind the camera ofc

29: YES I BELIEVE IN GHOSTS. and call me crazy but I had a whole phase of being obsessed with the history of horror urban legends which tbh still exists along side with true crime podcasts I listen to. And I've had paranormal experiences as well.

About aliens: honestly I totally believe that it's made up. But this is my opinion totally. But at the same time what if they do. Think of it. Human imagination can create the most quirky, out of the box things ever and human intelligence helps it to come into being. So in a way humans might have thought that "what if life exists in space?" "what if there's a another planet in which life may have existed" Curiosity helps us to know about the unknown but SOME ABSURD SIGHTINGS makes us wonder otherwise making us stick to that thing to research for it more. And at the end of the I feel like if aliens did exist we should mind our business and they should too.

"I ain't bugging you, you ain't gonna bug me"

This should a sign board in space on a rocket ship or something fr if aliens exist ✨

[t1erradelfuego]

i can't sleep because of the Horrors (seasonal allergies) and as a result am extremely wired on cough medicine so here are a bunch of hockey rpf fics formatted as ao3 fics that i want to READ except they don't EXIST. obviously nsfw. deeply insane RPF below.

the feeling's there [frank nazar III/rutger mcgroarty, slow burn, getting together, unrequited feelings, miscommunication] -- Frankie's fucking stupid. Rutger's known that since they were 13. Nothing changes until everything does in Michigan.

more notes: if you played with the same person on almost every team since you were 13 you too would take him for granted! he's been your shadow for the last six years and he loves you and he knows you but you tolerate him at best. and it's enough for him but it's more than you even wanted. he follows you home. so you feel trapped. so you push him away and this time he listens because he loves you. and you see him with your teammates and for the first time he's not looking at you. you want him to look at you. you dont know why. you kind of miss it when he sits in your room not even doing anything, just happy to sit with you. college's been lonelier than you wanted it to be. something dark and ugly settles at the bottom in the pit of your stomach and it tastes like regret and it tastes like too late. and when you think about the distance between winnipeg and chicago (13 hours, 863 miles, too far, too long) you know you shouldn't try. it wouldn't be fair to either of you. but you want to try. you want to hurt him, you want to hurt yourself and you might've already done both. god, do you even know him?

guys, no one say anything! [trevor zegras/jamie drysdale, multimedia/trans media/mixed media, established relationship, coming out, secret marriage] -- Unknown Author. celebgossipdaily.com, "Anaheim Ducks' Trevor Zegras Reportedly Married + Reps Confirm", accessed March 07, 2025. Katherine Bailey ESPN @kbbailey Congratulations to Trevor Zegras on his marriage! The Anaheim Ducks centre was spotted in preseason media with a wedding ring. from: hughesy dude. why is my team asking me if i went to your wedding??? more notes: there were some truly inspired tags when the jimmy podcast came out and one of them was "do you think if they just keep slowly coming out they never have to make a statement" and. well. WHAT a PROMPT. before i am anything i am a mixed media girlie at heart and this would be so fun to incorporate news articles, text messages, tweets, tumblr posts, emails, reciepts, news articles etc etc. what i'm thinking is this is from 2024-2030 and spans several contracts, playoffs, a stanley cup, their MARRIAGE, buying a house, getting a dog, actually coming out to their family, and then the epilogue is set in 20XX when they actually do come out to the public!

point dover [owen power/******* *****/kent johnson/******* *******, polyamory negotiations, long distance relationship, real life wag, canadian polycule] -- Toronto, Buffalo, Vancouver, and Columbus all intersect at a place called Point Dover, by the lake. Or: There's four cities, three different timezones, and two countries between all of them. They get there, somehow, and then they make it work. Somehow. Or: Owen thinks navigating their relationship is easier than navigating the group chat, and he's not really wrong. Or: "Kent, is your girlfriend single?"

more notes: they're all stupid hot and went on vacation together what more do you want. redacting their actual names because i am Paranoid but. if you know. you know! i am a very big fan of best friends to lovers and it's so easy when kent and owen are best friends. and then you have the other two speed running the lovers part by commenting some seriously insane shit on each other's posts like WHY DON'T YOU ALL KISS ABOUT IT!!! GOD!!! THE SEXUAL TENSION IN THE INSTAGRAM COMMENTS!!!

mount joy's for lovers [nolan patrick/travis konecny, travis konecny/karly konecny, nolan patrick & karly konecny, polyamory negotiations, coparenting, queerplatonic relationships, alternate universe - canon divergence, nolan is still a flyer] -- It's more natural than it should be, more simple than what he thought it was going to be. But it's Travis, it was always going to be easy falling in line with whatever stupid plan he wants Nolan to be a part of, and it's Travis, so he makes it work. Even if it's stupid. He used a meme in the powerpoint, something about Justin Bieber having two hands, and it was so stupid, and Nolan made immediate eye contact with Karly, the two of them bursting into laughter, and he knew. It was always going to be easy between the three of them. more notes: travis konecny can have it all!!! look i am deeply fond of complex polyamorous relationships and i love thinking about how their relationship works. nolan and karly have a deeply platonic and loving friendship that makes it work, that lets karly let nolan be a part of their lives, that lets nolan think of their child as his, that lets travis have two romantic relationships with the people he loves the most!!! sometimes they all bang together, most times actually even though nolan is deeply allergic to pussy and karly would not touch his dick with a 10ft pole, but it works when they concentrate on their favourite thing which is: giving travis everything he could ever want!!! it's like. karly stresses less and has more time to herself. travis doesn't have to worry about being a bad husband or a bad best friend because he has enough love for two people. nolan doesn't have to worry about being a homewrecker. do you see the vibe do you-[gets shot]

super secret canadian boyfriend [trevor zegras/jamie drysdale, 5+1 things, alternate universe - college/university, canon divergence, jamie is still a member of the ducks, secret relationship, POV outsider, USNTDP 2017-2019 Ensemble] -- Trevor's such a bad fucking liar. There's no way he actually has a boyfriend, who just coincidentally happens to be busy all the time, avoids social media like the plague, and is from Canada, so it's not like he can even ask his friends if they know this Jimmy dude, or whatever. Trevor tried to tell him he played in the NHL, and Jack actually laughed so hard that he choked on his Chipotle. more notes: if trevor ever introduced jamie as his boyfriend he would get so clowned upon. oh what's this? you have a secret boyfriend you won't let us meet because he's busy all the time? and he's from canada? and he has no social media? jamie does not sound REAL. AT ALL.

hansel [luke hughes, quinn hughes, jack hughes, the hughes family, magical realism, alternate universe - canon divergence, pondering the important question of what is a hughes if not a brother, family dynamics, character study] -- "Here's the thing no one ever told me about. Not in the program, not at college, not in the show — just — absolutely nothing. Okay, are you listening? Sometimes, when you ask for something, the universe will listen." more notes: i sent an ask to someone while pondering the fantillis vs hughes re: sibling identity and they replied with "i want a fic where luke gets to experience being an only child and what changes" and i was like. wow. i want this fic too! in this universe luke's a center and he gets draft early 2nd round and they never move to michigan and he never makes it into the NTDP, never goes to michigan, goes through the AHL for a bit, nowhere near as competitive or determined or skilled as he was, more importantly. he's so lonely. god he wanted to get away from his brothers and he didn't realize how lonely he was.

a seat at the kitchen table [jack eichel/connor mcdavid, alternate universe - canon divergence, alternate universe - chefs, connor is still a hockey player jack is not, edmonton oilers ensemble, food as love language, eating disorders, neurodivergent characters] -- "Food doesn't just have to be fuel for performance, you know." Jack says pointedly, staring at Connor as he slices a leek lengthwise without ever looking away. "Everyone needs to eat, but there's more than that. Otherwise, we wouldn't have leek and potato soup. Absolute waste of ingredients in terms of preparation, but the best fucking soup I ever had." more notes: from my b*n appet*t days... i just think there is something so poignant about autism coding connor mcdavid and giving him food sensory issues coupled with the rigid belief that everything he has to eat must be good for his hockey, because, you know, it's all about the hockey. It's Not Not an eating disorder. but our guy jack eichel! former hockey player after he injured his spine! michellin star chef! burnt out from the restaurant world and takes a private live-in chef posting in the middle of edmonton for connor mcdavid. did he know it was connor mcdavid? no. anyways! i just think the intimacy of coming home to someone cooking for you would make anyone insane.

[bookclub4m]

Episode 178 - Aliens, Extraterrestrials, and UFOs

This episode we’re talking about non-fiction books about Aliens, Extraterrestrials, and UFOs! We discuss unexplained aerial phenomenon, owls, exobiology, and aliens wearing hats!

You can download the podcast directly, find it on Libsyn, or get it through Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, Google Podcasts, or your favourite podcast delivery system.

In this episode

Anna Ferri | Meghan Whyte | Matthew Murray | Jam Edwards

Things We Read (or tried to…)

Astrobiology: A Very Short Introduction by David C. Catling

The Zoologist's Guide to the Galaxy: What Animals on Earth Reveal about Aliens – and Ourselves by Arik Kershenbaum

Death from the Skies! These Are the Ways the World Will End… by Philip Plait

Death from the Skies! The Science Behind the End of the World…

Search for the Unknown: Canada’s UFO Files and the Rise of Conspiracy Theory by Matthew Hayes

Aliens: Join the Scientists Searching Space for Extraterrestrial Life by Joalda Morancy, illustrated by Amy Grimes

Picturing Extraterrestrials: Alien Images in Modern Mass Culture by John F. Moffitt

Intimate Alien: The Hidden Story of the UFO by David J Halperin

They Are Already Here: UFO Culture and Why We See Saucers by Sarah Scoles

Mirage Men: An Adventure into Paranoia, Espionage, Psychological Warfare, and UFOs by Mark Pikington

Mirage Men (Wikipedia) - The documentary

Other Media We Mentioned

Chariots of The Gods by Erich von Däniken

Chariots of the Gods? (Wikipedia)

The X-Files (Wikipedia)

Mars Attacks! (1996 film)

The yodeling scene ("Indian Love Call" by Slim Whitman)

Mars Attacks (Wikipedia)

The trading cards

Communion: A True Story by Whitley Strieber

The Disappearing Act by Florence de Changy

Disappearance of the Malaysian airplane

Links, Articles, and Things

Barney and Betty Hill incident (Wikipedia)

METI International (Wikipedia)

Reptilian conspiracy theory (Wikipedia)

ʻOumuamua (Wikipedia)

Raëlism (Wikipedia)

Martian canals (Wikipedia)

Neon Squid Books

U.S. judge says Penguin Random House book merger cannot go forward

Advanced Aerospace Threat Identification Program (Wikipedia)

How Blink-182’s Tom DeLonge Became a U.F.O. Researcher

10 Non-Fiction Books About Aliens & UFOs (and other phenomena) by BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, & People of Colour) Authors

Every month Book Club for Masochists: A Readers’ Advisory Podcasts chooses a genre at random and we read and discuss books from that genre. We also put together book lists for each episode/genre that feature works by BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, & People of Colour) authors. All of the lists can be found here.

Aliens: The World's Leading Scientists on the Search for Extraterrestrial Life edited by Jim Al-Khalili

Black Holes, Wormholes and Time Machines by Jim Al-Khalili

More Encounters with Star People: Urban American Indians Tells Their Stories by Ardy Sixkiller Clarke

Strange New Worlds: The Search for Alien Planets and Life Beyond Our Solar System by Ray Jayawardhana

Physics of the Impossible by Michio Kaku

Aliens: Join the Scientists Searching Space for Extraterrestrial Life by Joalda Morancy

Mapping the Heavens: The Radical Scientific Ideas That Reveal the Cosmos by Priyamvada Natarajan

Mondes d'ailleurs by Trịnh Xuân Thuận

Cosmic Queries: StarTalk's Guide to Who We Are, How We Got Here, and Where We're Going by Neil deGrasse Tyson

Why Aren't They Here: The Question of Life on Other Worlds by Surendra Verma

Give us feedback!

Fill out the form to ask for a recommendation or suggest a genre or title for us to read!

Check out our Tumblr, follow us on Twitter or Instagram, join our Facebook Group, or send us an email!

Join us again on Tuesday, July 18th it’s time for our annual One Book One Podcast pitch episode!

Then on Tuesday, August 1st we’ll be discussing the genre of Pulp Fiction!

[the-one-and-only-duckduckgo]

As I see the word around me turning pink (or, in some cases, purple), I've decided that it's time to make a sequel to that tma post. Yes, I'm at episode 20. No, I'm not okay (I promise). Perhaps, I need therapy. Anyways, enjoy:

The Magnus Archives but I've met the fandom (and am even more confused)

There's an Archivist (you have to use the capital letter if you want to survive), his name is Jon,sometimes Jonathan and sometimes Jalapeño.

He is also somehow the author of the podcast, and the guy speaking. I don't know how. Nothing feels real anymore.

Apparently, he brings the romantic side of the podcast. I'm glad. He should think about bringing the "makes sense" side too.

#JusticeForMartin2024

Get. Sasha. And. Tim. Some. Fucking. Representation.

There's Gerard Keay, who doesn't have anything to do with Gerard Way (I checked), and I love him.

He's also very dead. My point still stands.

WHERE IS THAT FUCKING HOMOPHOBIC VASE WHY DON'T YOU WANT ME TO UNDERSTAND YOUR INSIDE JOKE, WHY?

There's a guy named Evan Lukas, whose name reminds me of another guy. Was it James Lukas? Peter Lukas? George Lukas? Not a single idea.

Five people told me to be scared of the Mikes.

Who are they?

Is that a sect? A typo? A secret level you unlock once you understand what that vase joke refers to?

There's a secret link between everything.

Is it that every one of the stories involves being scared of something, and being alone?

Wait. Nevermind. That's a horror podcast, people are usually scared in these. I'm trying to be logical here.

I miss Gerard Keay.

OH WAIT WAIT SORRY I DIDN'T TELL Y'ALL THAT JALAPENO CAME OUT OF HIS RECORDING CLOSET TO TALK TO A MADAM. THAT REALLY DISTURBED HIM AND HE HAD TO LOCK HIMSELF AGAIN TO RECOVER, BUT I'M PROUD OF THE PROGRESS HE MADE

Michael is not okay. Do they need help?

I don't know their pronouns, and people answered with really disturbing and unhelpful things. Could someone help?

I kinda like Michael. Even if they're blonde.

Unless they're part of the Mikes. I have a bad feeling about the Mikes.

Uhh lots of blood, spiders, worms, death, spooky nights, people being alone, eyes everywhere, insanity, blood sacrifices, the Unknown, and evil books.

Oh, and drugs. Very important, the drugs

Leaving you with that, hope I didn't miss a very important point. May the stars shine in your direction, or whatever.

[detroit-grand-prix]

Wildest Dreams Chapter 21 - mad woman, part 2

Chapter summary: The unusual 2020 season proceeds on, through Italy, Russia, and Germany. Monza is her favorite place, and Bee wants to get a good result there. Maybe here she can break an unfortunate record that's decades old. But racing in Germany brings up questions about home and identity for her.

Content warning: N/A

Chapter word count: 5,500

Author's Notes: Here is a link to a full-sized version of the image used in this chapter, for mobile. I didn't realize how bad the mobile view compressed it.

I just need to point out that this is where another major deviation from these events in real-time take place. The 2020 Italian GP was actually the Williams' family's final race as far as their involvement with the team goes. I think Dorilton Capital bought them before the 2020 season. But, Claire is still plot-relevant for future things for me, so in this AU, they've pushed that back a year.

I discovered a site that allows you to generate fake twitter screenshots and went a little buckwild with it. A lot of the accounts are just made up, but a few are real and some of my favorite F1 creators. I didn't ask them for permission for the little "cameo", which, maybe I should've but... if any of them have an issue I'll take them out. And I'll link them here!

Live Laugh Lyds - amazing, fun TikTok her, self-appointed president of the Danny Ric fanclub, does fun things like outfits inspired by F1, vlogs, and other fun things

F1Toni - Incredibly informative, talks a lot about the little intracies of F1, some engineering things, history, hows & whys, and is a huge advocate for women and women content creators in the F1 space. Aston Martin also brought her in to talk to Sebastian Vettel in Miami!!

The Red Flags F1 Podcast - They brand themselves as a podcast for "little sluts who live for the drama" and that is an accurate description. It's from an American perspective/"fan who discovered the sport through DTS perspective", so it might not be for everyone, but I absolutely love it. I don't even listen to podcasts, normally, but I love this one.

Here's a video of George tormenting his poor performance coach by driving him around the Nordschleife. I can say this with absolute confidence: I would NEVER.

And here's the video tour that George and Nicky gave of their team motorhome in Spa during the 2020 season!

And finally, here is a picture of the Germania statue that Bee has on her helmet. I don't think it's really the German equivalent of the Statue of Liberty, but it was the closest thing I could find.

Next chapter will probably be the conclusion of the 2020 season and the start of the 2021 season.

Autodromo Nazionale di Monza, Monza, Province of Monza and Brianza, Lombardy, Italy September 6th, 2020

Bee and Emilia left the hotel early on the morning of race day. She had a scheduled interview with the Drive to Survive crew before she needed to get ready for the race - the camera crew wasn’t embedded with Williams today, but they asked each driver to give periodic interviews at most of the races. There were throngs of people gathered around outside the hotel, all clad in red, with prancing horse banners and Italian flags. The fans couldn’t attend the race, but they were gathered outside of the hotel most of the drivers were in, hoping to catch a glimpse of Charles, Sebastian, or Carlos Sainz, who had just been announced as a Ferrari driver next season. 

Bee didn’t pay much attention as she was walking outside, chatting with Emilia as they walked to the car. They both had face masks and sunglasses on, which normally allowed Bee some degree of anonymity - not that she needed it yet, she was still a relative unknown amongst the grid. The only thing that would have indicated who she was was her Williams team kit. 

Except - they were almost to the car, when one woman, standing by the gate, yelled out, “È La Vespa!”

Bee whipped her head around to see a small contingent trying to get a good look at her over the gate. She stopped, took her sunglasses off, and waved to them. Another woman in the crowd shouted, “Buona fortuna!”

“Ciao! Grazie, ragazzi!" Bee shouted, waving to the few people in the crowd that had turned their heads. 

“I didn’t know you had Italian fans.” Emilia said, as Bee drove past more gathered fans near the entrance to the track. “I thought they were all Ferrari fans. And I didn’t know you spoke any Italian, either.”

“It surprises me sometimes, too - having Italian fans, I mean. But I’ve not had a bad race at this track, not since I raced here in Formula Renault. Maybe it just means I’ve earned their respect, or something. And what I said is basically the extent of my Italian vocabulary.” 

“And what were they calling you? La… vespa? Isn’t that a scooter?” 

Bee laughed. 

“Oh, it means ‘the wasp’. Two years ago, I raced in Formula 2 here. You’ve probably noticed that Formula 2 has two races per weekend, right? So I qualified on pole position, got first place in both races, and broke the lap record for the track in Formula 2 cars. After that, the Italian-language motorsport press started calling me La Vespa di Monza, or “the wasp of Monza”. You know, because… my nickname is Bee.”

“Oh… that explains the design for your helmet this weekend.”

“Yup!” Bee said, brightly. She had been using the helmet that Susie had given her ahead of the Austrian Grand Prix as her normal helmet for the season, but Monza was the first race she’d wanted a special helmet for. 

She had opted for a minimalist, matte black helmet with angled, gold, art-deco style lines that formed a minimalist graphic of what looked like a wasp. It was supposed to be a bee, but Bee’s helmet designer decided that it would look better with a more angular, slender quality that made it look more aggressive. It looked amazing. She hadn’t yet developed a personal logo like a lot of drivers did, but she thought about asking the the designer if she could use the design. The bee also had a crown drawn on its head. From the top of the visor to the back were three stripes in the colors of the Italian flag. All of her sponsor and team logos were done in the same gold paint as the bee. 

They went through the usual pre-race rituals - warmups, stretching, national anthem, pre-race presentation. Bee’s car was brought to its spot on the grid, and she clambered over the halo with her step stool. Her mechanics made their final adjustments, and the view from the middle of the grid looked strange, with her sitting in P11. She’d never been this far up. She did her usual pre-start ritual that Susie had taught her, narrowing her focus to just the bank of red lights. She could hear nothing but her own breath.

It was lights out in Monza.

She got a clean getaway, managing to stay out of the inevitable chaos into Rettifilo, and then went flat out into Biassono. She sank into the rhythm of throttle and braking quickly. It was strange to see a Renault and Racing Point behind her. Gaetan kept her up to date on the pace of the cars in front of her. On lap 7, she noticed what looked like a flurry of snow by the first chicane. 

“Vettel out, brake failure. He went through the runoff area.” Gaetan said. Sebastian must have smashed through the styrofoam indicator signs. Bee felt a momentary pang of sadness - she knew that Monza meant a lot to him as a Ferrari driver, and this was his last race as a Ferrari driver at Monza. News had recently broken that his contract was not renewed, which caught everyone off-guard. 

“Copy.”

Magnussen breaking down near the pit lane entrance brought out the first safety car. 

“Pit lane entry is closed, we are staying out for now.” Gaetan said. Bizarrely, Lewis and Antonio Giovinazzi dived into the pit anyway. They’d be getting a stop-and-go penalty for that, no doubt. She went in for new tires two laps later when most of the field did.

Charles Leclerc skidded off in the Parabolica on lap 23, from P4, bringing out another safety car, and then a red flag. 

“Okay, Phoebe, they have to repair the barrier, red flag.” 

“Copy. Is Leclerc okay?”

“Yes, all fine. Line up in race order in the pit lane, please, you are P10. We can put softs on and try to stay out for the rest of the race if you think you can manage them. Tire deg looks fine for now, so we should be okay with that plan. It will be a standing restart.”

Bee was in P10 as of the standing start, with George in P12. 

As they were waiting for the restart, Bee felt her nerves creeping in. She was in the points right now. If she could just hang on to her position - 

After the restart, Lance Stroll went wide at della Roggia and dropped a few places, and Lewis and Antonio both had to serve penalties.

“Gasly in lead after Hamilton’s penalty, you are three seconds behind Kyvat. Pace is good but push a bit if you can.”

She leaned onto the throttle a bit more to up her pace a bit to make up the gap to being within DRS range, but had to be careful at this point not to be caught in a potential DRS train.

“Verstappen retirement, Phoebe. No safety car. ” 

Max had been in P11 at the restart, so that meant George was now. 

“Stay calm, Bee.” She told herself. “You got this.”

“DRS available on Kyvat.” She overtook him as they headed into the Parabolica. She thought he’d try to defend more, but she practically skated past him as she picked up speed through the turn.

“You are now in P9. Ocon is too far ahead for now, so hold position. And stay calm. You have it.” Gaetan said. His voice was doing the thing where it sometimes dropped to a near-whisper, which did have a strangely calming effect on Phoebe. It almost felt like someone scratching an itch in her brain. 

“Copy.” 

Kimi dropped back down to 13th eventually. 

They pulled George into the pits to put him on softs for the last few laps, which allowed him to undercut Perez. Phoebe crossed the line on the checkered flag. She wasn’t sure where she’d ended up - it was a wild race. 

“What was our place, Gaetan?”

After the longest few seconds of her life, Gaetan spoke up, clearly expending a great amount of energy to remain calm: “Phoebe Stallard… that is a P9. That was an amazing drive today. And George, P10. That’s double points for today.” 

The garage was in raptures in the background of Gaetan’s radio. 

“I… we did it?”

“Yes, you had a wonderful drive today. I knew you could do it.” Gaetan said. “That’s three points for today! Amazing job from both of you!”

Bee had to pop open her visor and wipe her eyes with her gloved hand, her eyes had started watering. She wasn’t crying. That’s what she told herself, anyway, but all the same, tears had immediately started flooding her vision and she couldn’t see where she was going.

“I can’t believe it. I…”

It shouldn’t have been that overwhelming, she thought, but it was. After seeing how hard the team - George, in particular, fought to get even a single point last year and finished the season with that single point, the fact that the two of them had both been able to score points felt incredible.

As Bee was trying to do some quick math in her head to tabulate the team’s current standings in the constructor’s championship, another voice came through her radio. “Phoebe, that was outstanding, outstanding work today. Truly amazing. And you are now the first woman to score points in a Grand Prix since Lella Lombardi.” It was Claire. “I’m so proud of you. You’ve made history today.” 

It couldn’t have been a more fitting end to Monza for her. It was her best result so far, her team’s best result in years. She’d done what no woman had done since 1975 - 45 years prior. It was at her favorite track, in what happened to be Lombardi’s home country. 

She did her cooldown lap and circled back into parc ferme. She almost didn’t want to get out of the car. She somehow wanted to hang on to this moment - this feeling - forever. 

She climbed out of the car, and didn’t see George running up to her side to throw his long arms around her, tapping on the top of her helmet. She hugged him back, and he picked her up a few inches off the ground. She could barely hear what he was saying.

They stripped off their helmets and walked to the weighbridge area together. “That was absolutely mega today, double points. Do you know the last time that happened?”

George and Bee continued on to the weighbridge, but kept getting waylaid by the other drivers congratulating the two of them. It seemed that everyone - even competition, was rooting for an underdog team like Williams. Sure, every team wanted to beat the others, but it wasn’t exciting if there were always a few teams at the bottom that weren’t able to be competitive at all. A larger, more competitive midfield was good for the sport and made for better racing, and it seemed that everyone knew it.

They left the weighbridge to head back to the Williams garage, greeted by a hail of deafening cheers. Claire was crying. She rushed toward Phoebe, scooping her into an enormous hug.  

“Claire, I’m gross!” She could feel the sweat that was soaking the back of her suit through her fireproofs, that Claire was running her hands over.

“I don’t care!” 

Things calmed down enough to where Bee could head back to the paddock to report to the media pen. Emilia had brought her a towel and her drink bottle so she could start rehydrating a little before she had to put her mask back on and go talk to journalists. She was a little disoriented from the combination of excitement and post-race exhaustion, and followed Emma, her press officer, from station to station in the media pen. 

The media pen was abuzz - the race results were unexpected. Not only was it the first double-points finish by Williams in two years, and had the first woman in almost five decades earning championship points, but with a full podium of drivers from midfield teams, it was the first time that any the three top teams - Ferrari, Mercedes, and Red Bull - failed to score a podium since 2012. 

While she was talking to Jennie Gow from the BBC, she felt someone tap on her shoulder. 

“Sorry, Jennie -” she turned around to see who it was. 

Valtteri had been walking behind her as he was leaving the media area. “See? I told you it would come soon. Good job.” he said. 

“Thank you.” she said, clapping him on the arm as he walked away.

Bee turned back to Jennie and smiled. “Sorry about that, where were we?”

She finished all of her interviews (there were more than a few) and was talking to Emma as they walked back to the Williams motorhome. She was still over the moon, but exhaustion was starting to set in. It had been an incredibly long day. She wanted to shower, and to get something to eat. She wanted to call her mom. She wanted to -

“Bienchen!” 

She turned around to see Toto striding up the paddock behind her. He clasped Phoebe in a tight hug, ruffling her hair a bit. She was still sweaty but it didn’t seem to matter to Toto. Technically social distancing rules were still in place, but neither of them cared.

“I know I’ve said this before - it seems like I’ve said it so much, but I don’t mean it any less. I’m so proud of you. I knew you were going to match Lombardi someday, and I had a feeling - I was hoping - it would be today.”

Bee blushed, and smiled. “Thank you, Toto. I’m really sorry about your race today, though.” It wasn’t a good result for Mercedes, at least not compared to their normal results. They had been hampered by poor strategy decisions and penalties that caused Valtteri and Lewis to end up in P5 and P7 respectively. It was especially devastating after they’d had a front-row lockout through qualifying. 

“Honestly, right now, I’m not even concerned. I’ll worry about it later on when we have the team debrief. Seeing you drive so well, and seeing both you and George finishing in the points? Plus, I know you know this already, but you made history today.” Toto released her from his embrace, and rested his hands on her shoulders, looking down at her. 

Even with his mask on, Bee could see that he really was proud of her, and it was incredibly gratifying. There was something about Toto that made Bee want to make him proud. Maybe it was because she’d known him since she was a teenager. Maybe it was because he was never one to hold back on how he truly felt about things, and could be notoriously difficult to please at times. When Toto Wolff told you he was proud of you, you knew he meant it.

“You could DNF every race for the rest of the season, and you’ll still have that.”

Bee laughed. “Well, I hope that doesn’t happen.”

They talked for a few more minutes, as Emma stood by. Bee told her that she would be back in the garage shortly, and that she didn’t have to wait for her. She and Toto made plans to meet for dinner when they would be in Mugello the following week, to catch up. Between COVID restrictions in the paddock and the strange, condensed race schedule, the two of them hadn’t actually talked or seen each other in person in quite a while, primarily communicating via WhatsApp, and only occasionally now that Bee wasn’t actively working for Mercedes. Bee had missed talking to him very much.  

She finally got a chance to get back to the Williams motorhome to take shower and change. Claire had sent her a text that there would be a small party in the garage to celebrate. The team had ordered pizza and somehow got it back into paddock in spite of the restrictions. The whole team took another group picture with the pitboard signs, this time, they read:

PHOEBE - P9

1ST CAREER POINTS!!!

GEORGE - P10!!

Bee finally got a chance to check her phone hours after the race had finished, and she was surprised it hadn’t exploded. Social media had been on fire for hours. Her name was trending in Italy and in the US. There was even a tweet from the governor of the state of Michigan congratulating her, which was a bit inconceivable to think about.

She finally called her parents,  and they said they’d watched the replay of the race twice. 

“I wish we could have been there, honeybee.” her mom said. It made Bee a little sad. In her fantasies of being a Formula 1 driver during her teenage years, she’d always envisioned her parents being there to celebrate with her after a good race. They still hadn’t even gotten to watch her race in person since she’d gotten her seat. They still hadn’t been to a race in Monza. 

“Well,” Bee said, trying not to sound as sad as she felt. “I heard rumors that they’re going to be allowing a few fans to attend races in-person soon, so maybe for the Eifel Grand Prix… I can check. It’s not too far to Nürburg from home, if I can get some tickets for you…”

“Of course we’ll come. We would have come to Italy this weekend if it had been allowed. I know you love that track, and I’ve always wanted to see you race there.” John said. “Next year, for sure.” 

Susie called after her parents hung up. It was late, then, but Bee was happy to stay up to be able to talk to her. They talked for a long time. Susie had basically told her the same thing Toto had - that she knew she would match Lella Lombardi, that she’d hoped it would be at Monza, 

that she was enormously proud of her. 

Bee had heard it a lot as she kept racing and kept improving, but she didn’t really mind - it was always nice to hear. 

Knowing she was doing right by the people that had supported her racing career from early on, that she had people cheering for her, fighting for her when need be - it was a talisman.It was something to hang on to when things got hard, when she didn’t qualify well or didn’t place well, or when she was sore, or tired, or sick of traveling. Even when her confidence was shaken.

Nürburgring, Nürburg, Rhineland-Palatinate, GermanyOctober 8th, 2020

By the time the Eifel Grand Prix came around in October, the season had started to normalize as much as could be expected given the circumstances. Fans were allowed to attend in-person, albeit in very limited numbers. Bee had scored a point again in the Tuscan Grand Prix, but it was because approximately half of the grid had retirements for various reasons. She had George had swapped their positions from Monza - she had been P10 to his P9. 

Paddock restrictions had been easing a little, too, so there was a bit more interaction between teams and drivers. It was good, because Bee had started to feel isolated and a bit lonely, like the other drivers were still near-strangers for the most part, other than the ones that were her age. She had been able to see Toto more. She was starting to have more fun, too. Williams had stepped up their social media content efforts, which involved filming fun challenges and videos for YouTube with George.

Ahead of the Eifel Grand Prix, they had made a video called “German Lessons with Phoebe and George”, where Bee taught George some basic German phrases and greetings. It was silly and fun, and fans seemed to like videos of the two of them doing things together like that - it showed an unserious side of a serious sport.

The Eifel GP was confirmed as one of the races where some spectators would be allowed in so her parents were going to be able to come - they would not be able to get paddock passes, but having them there to actually see her compete in F1 would be nice. 

The weekend started poorly, with Free Practice 1 being canceled because of the rain and fog - the medical helicopter was not able to take off, so they couldn’t run a session without it.

“Welcome to the Eifel,” she said to George as they were standing around the garage as rain poured outside. They were waiting to see if the weather would clear up enough for practice to start, but it wasn’t looking good. Bee felt a little bad, because there were two F2 drivers that were scheduled to do tests during FP1 today with other teams, and it looked like they wouldn’t get the chance now.

“This is one of the reasons the Nordschleife is so dangerous. The weather is so unpredictable because of the mountains.” Bee said. “Speaking of which, didn’t you take Aleix for a lap around it yesterday?”

“Yes, and the traction was awful. The track was soaked, even having road tires wasn’t making much difference. It was fun though!” George and his trainer made a video for Youtube, just like Bee and Emilia had at Monza. Aleix’s reaction was fairly similar to Emilia’s, apparently.

“They couldn’t pay me enough to drive anything faster than like… a Ford Fiesta on that track. We both know two people who have almost died there.”

They sat in the garage, away from the rain, and chatted a bit more. After a while though, both she and George started getting a little antsy. They found one of the promotional rubber ducks that were being sold as team merchandise and started having an unofficial contest to see who could keep it up in the air longer, like it was a football. Humorously, the official Formula 1 channel ended up filming it and putting it on Twitter about an hour later. 

Free practice 2 was also rained out. Bee didn’t even bother putting her race suit back on. She had her fireproofs on under a pair of black track pants and a raincoat.

To pass the time, George and Phoebe found the pitboard signs and letters by the pitlane workstation and kept changing them to show silly messages to the handful of dedicated, rain-soaked fans that were seated in the grandstands, through the gaps in the pitwall fence. She wasn’t even sure the letters would be readable from that distance, but it was something to do. 

Eventually, she started getting too cold from the damp and headed back into the garage, sitting and talking with Claire at the engineering station.

“Your parents are supposed to be coming for the race, right?” Claire said.

“As far as I know. They’re supposed to be here tomorrow for qualifying, even. It’s about a… four hour drive from home and they’re leaving first thing. I kind of wish they could come down to the paddock. You’ve never met my parents, have you?”

“Not that I remember, I don’t think. I’ve seen them before. But honestly, it’s still a bit strange to me that you’re - and don’t think I mean this in a bad way, but very obviously an American, so sometimes I forget that when you say “home”, you mean Stuttgart.” Clarie said. 

Bee sighed. Without meaning to, Claire had touched on an internal struggle Bee had had most of her life. 

“I know, it’s weird to me, too. I mean, I imagine it’s normal for anyone that doesn’t live in the country they’re originally from. I’ve never felt like I’m German, or even German-American because I can’t get German citizenship without giving up my US citizenship, but Germany feels like it’s home. 

But when I go to the US, which actually is home, I feel out of place because I haven’t lived there full-time since I was a kid. Before I started doing karting seriously, I’d spend the summers with my grandparents in Michigan, and I’d come back to Germany and things would feel strange for a while again. But, it’s not like anyone looking at me wouldn’t know I’m not German, you know? Until I talk and someone picks up on my accent, I just sort of… blend in.” She shrugged, and went on.

“And then, when I moved to the UK, that was different, too, because I didn’t feel like I had to try to adopt a new identity - like, I know that the UK isn’t home, it’s just where I moved for work. In the UK, I’m an expat, not an immigrant.  I think that’s how my parents feel about Germany, but it’s different for me because I grew up in Germany. I try not to think about it too much most of the time, because I think it was a real benefit for my racing career. I don’t think I would have even picked up karting as a kid if I lived in the states. If I had, I don’t think I could have gotten this far.” 

“It does seem like you kind of were in the right place to do it. Every other American kid that starts out in karts ends up in NASCAR or IndyCar, unless they move to Europe, which very few of them do because of how difficult and expensive it is. It’s hard to leave your family when you’re that young. That’s one of the big reasons we’ve not seen many Americans on the grid.” Claire said. 

Bee’s parents called her early the next morning and confirmed they would be arriving just before qualifying. They were staying in the same hotel, which was pretty much on the track’s grounds. It was nice, because she could sleep in longer and just make the 5-minute walk to the gates. 

She was excited for Free Practice, though - it had been a long time since she’d been at this particular track. She hadn’t raced here since she was in Formula 3. Driving the track in a Formula 1 car would be like driving it for the first time again. It was an interesting track - lots of quick turns, and you had to be very strategic about using the shorter-than-average straights and DRS zones for overtaking. 

After Free Practice, Bee left the paddock briefly to say hello to her parents. Bee’s mom handed her a large plastic container of cookies she’d made. 

“These are for your team, I think I made enough for everyone to have seconds.”

“Wow, they’ll love these -” She opened the container, and frowned. 

“Lebkuchen? But… it’s not Christmas.” They were a spiced cookie frosted with sugary icing, similar to gingerbread, and popular at Christmastime in Germany. They were so tightly associated with Christmas in Bee’s mind that it was jarring to see them in early October.

“Well, I think they’re fine for fall, too. See, I even used a leaf-shaped cookie cutter. Nobody will know any better.”

It didn’t matter if they were Christmas cookies or not - the entire crew was very excited about them. The social media team made a very cute post with a picture of two of Bee’s mechanics posing with theirs. 

“There’s nothing quite like cookies from mom, especially if it’s @racingbee’s mom. Thanks for bringing treats for the team today, Mrs. Stallard! We loved them.”

Bee forwarded her mom the post in a WhatsApp message. “Look, you’re famous.” she said. 

“See?” Josephine said. “They’re not just for Christmas.”

Qualifying was a mixed affair. On the upside, the weather had cleared up and there was no rain expected during the session. George got into Q2, and Bee just barely missed it.

After she changed, she headed back to the hotel to meet her parents for dinner. Toto spotted them in the lobby as he was walking back from the track and John asked if he would join them. For some reason, it still surprised Bee that Toto and Susie got on with her parents so well. Not that there wasn’t any reason they wouldn’t, but beyond John and Toto’s shared interest in cars and racing, she wasn’t sure what they had in common. 

Toto was the type that could get along with anyone, though - she supposed that was why he’d been so successful in business.

For the race, Bee had another special helmet made. It was a challenge to get the design right - she’d wanted to use the colors of the German and American flags, but they weren’t particularly harmonious. 

The helmet was all red, with white paint. On the back, there was an outline of Stuttgart’s skyline in white. Toward the top of the back panel were the words “Schönheit und Schrecken”, or “beauty and terror”, from the Rainer Maria Rilke poem she’d read a few years ago - those lines had resonated with her. 

There was a stripe down the middle, starting from the visor and ending behind the skyline: a black and gold stripe with negative space in the middle for the German flag, and then a blue stripe with a line of white stars for the American flag. On the left side of her helmet was a design that featured the face of the Statue of Liberty, drawn in a stylistic sort of single-tone outline. 

On the right side, there was a similar design featuring the statue of Lady Germania, a personification of Germany from the Niederwald Monument in a town called Rüdesheim am Rhein, commemorating the unification of Germany in the 1800’s. She’d seen the monument once on a school trip to Frankfurt as a kid, and was always impressed with it. 

She looked at it before putting it on while she was getting ready, thinking back to her conversation with Claire. She couldn’t ever be German via passport, not without giving up her American one, but Germany was still home. America was home, too. It was where she was born, it was where her family was. 

They were both home. Both equally, but differently. 

It was another strange race, somewhat like Monza. Maybe the end result wasn’t so strange - Lewis and Max were both on the podium, that was business as usual. 

George, unfortunately, had to retire - Raikkonen tried to overtake him and ended up understeering into the side of his car. Kimi was given a ten-second penalty, and the crash brought out a virtual safety car. George was fine, but there was enough damage to the suspension, plus a puncture, that ensured he couldn’t continue. After four laps under the safety car, Alex Albon glanced off of Daniil Kyvat and knocked part of his front wing off, and Bee was able to pass both of them in the ensuing chaos. Lando’s car eventually lost power, and Esteban Ocon retired from the pits. The safety car came out and everyone but Grojean got new tires. The safety car lasted for an agonizing six full laps. Bee charged up into 10th, passing Kimi, Seb, and Antonio Giovinazzi after the safety car, taking advantage of Giovinazzi being held back by Grojean, who was still on old tyres. 

It was her second points finish. Her parents were there to see it. It was almost as thrilling as her points finish in Monza.

In the press pen, one of the Sky Sports Germany reporters wanted to talk to her - she was frequently interviewed by them, as one of the Germanophone drivers on the grid.

They asked her about how she thought her race went, as pitlane reporters were wont to do.

“I think it went well! I’m in the points again, which is fantastic. I am sad for George, I think his pace was decent before the incident with Kimi, but scoring points for me here in Germany… it’s kind of my home race, you know, was one of my goals for this season, so I’m really pleased. And this is the first race my parents have been able to attend in-person, so it’s really special that I was able to score points here. 

“Ah, so, you consider this your home race, even as an American driver?”

“I think so. One of them, at least. I know a few of the other drivers have different races that they all consider their home races, so I guess this is mine, until we can race in the US again. I grew up in Stuttgart, as you know, and I’ve lived here for most of my life. I love it here. I love the United States as well, but we can’t race in Austin this year. There’s a reason I put both the US flag and the Bundesflagge on my helmet for this race. I’m proud of being the first American in F1 in a long time, but it was living here in Germany from a young age that allowed me to get this far in racing, so I’m always going to consider it home.”

BONUS:

Williams Racing YouTube Channel

German Lessons with Phoebe and George | Williams Racing

Phoebe: Hallo, leute! Guten tag! [Hello, everyone! Good afternoon!]

George: Hello!

Phoebe: I'm Phoebe Stallard and I drive for the Williams Formula 1 team, and today, I’m going to be teaching my teammate George Russell some German before the Eifel Grand Prix this weekend.

[PHOEBE Narration over overhead shots of Nürburgring track]

The Eifel Grand Prix is taking place at the Nurburgring in Nurburg, Germany, on the ‘GP-Strecke’, or ‘GP Track’ layout. The Grand Prix is named for the Eifel mountain range that straddles western Germany and eastern Belgium. This is the first time in Formula 1 history that the Eifel Grand Prix will be run - it was added to the calendar after schedule changes made because of the COVID-19 pandemic. This is also the first time since the German Grand Prix in 2013 that the GP-Strecke layout has hosted a Formula 1 Grand Prix.

George: So, you’re American, but you speak German fluently, right?

Phoebe: Yes, that’s correct. I’m from the US but I grew up in Germany - my family moved there when I was five, so I had to learn it pretty early on. And you don’t speak any German at all, right?

George: Er, no… even after being around Toto so much. I’ve heard the two of you speaking German together, it always makes me feel like you’re talking about me. 

Phobe: [laughs] Maybe we are, you wouldn’t know! Anyway, we’re just gonna start with some basic greetings so you’ll be able to say hello to our German fans. So, to say “hello”, it’s pretty similar to how you’d say it in English, it’s just hello with an a sound instead of an e.

George: So it would just be… hallow? Hallo? 

Phoebe: Das ist richtig! Sehr gut! [That’s right! Very good!] We’re off to a good start.

Phoebe: Now, after you say hello, you’ll probably want to know how to introduce yourself, even though most people will probably know your name, but… it’s polite. For this, you would say Ich bin George. 

George: ‘Ish bin George. Issssh bin George.’ 

Phoebe: You could also say, “mein name ist George”.

George: That just sounds like English. 

Phoebe: Well, English and German are basically cousins, so there are a lot of German words that sound pretty similar. Now, if you wanted to tell someone you were from England, you would say, “Ich komme aus England”.

George: “ ish come ows England”. I’m guessing that “ich” means “I”, right?

Phoebe: You’re a quick study, you’ll be fluent in no time at this rate.

George: [laughs] Right, I doubt that. So how would you tell someone you’re from America?

Phoebe: Ich komme aus Amerika.

George: …Oh, that seems kind of obvious. 

Phoebe: Okay, now let’s put it all together, go ahead and say “Hello, my name is George, I’m from England.”

George: Okay, um… Hallow, mein name is George, ish, um… come? What was it… the word after?

Phoebe: Aus!

George: Right! “Hallo, mein name ist George, ich komme aus England”.

Phoebe: Sehr gut! Dein Deutsch ist perfekt! [Very good! Your German is perfect!]

George: I’m going to assume that means that my German is perfect. 

Phoebe: You assume correctly. Now, if you introduce yourself to someone, and they introduce themselves to you, it’s polite to say nice to meet you right? That’s a little more complicated. Well, kind of. You could say “Freut mich, dich kennenzulernen”, which is literally “I am pleased to meet you”, but that’s… 

George: Bit of a mouthful.

Phoebe: Yeah. So, most German speakers just say “freut mich”. 

George: Froit mish. 

Phoebe: Not bad! So, now, I guess, to sort of... round out this conversation, you’ll want to know how to say “goodbye”. I don’t know if you’re a fan of Rodgers and Hammerstein, but you might know this one.

George: Oh, it’s um… off weederseen or something like that, right?

Phoebe: Close! Auf wiedersehen. But that’s also kind of a mouthful, especially when you’re trying to make a swift departure, so what people will normally say is just, “tschüss”

George: Tschüss. Tschüss. Sounds like you’re saying “chews” like, really abruptly.

Phoebe: Yeah! Kind of. I guess? So, let’s put this all together. I want you to introduce yourself and tell me where you come from, I’ll introduce myself, and then you need to be polite , and then you can tell me “goodbye.”

George: Okay, I got this. Let’s do it. So… Hallo. Mein name ist George. Ich komme aus England.

Phoebe: Sehr gut, George! Hallo, George. Mein name ist Phoebe. Ich komme aus Amerika, aber ich lebe in Stuttgart. [but I live in Stuttgart].

George: [laughs] Oh, come on. That’s just showing off. Okay. Anyway. What was it - uh… Fr-fruet mich?  

Phoebe: Ja. Freut mich, George. Gut gemacht! [Well done!]

George: Okay, that was hard. But I got through it. 

Phoebe: See? You’ll be able to eavesdrop in on me and Toto soon. 

George: [laughs]. Okay, what was that last thing? Right. Tschüss!

Phoebe: Danke, leute! Tschüss!

[jorrmungandr]

Book of the New Sun: Some Thoughts

Okay, let's do this. I've been ruminating on these books and the accompanying podcasts from Ranged Touch for several weeks now, and I've got some thoughts.

The last book was a bit disappointing, in the ways that it explained things I don't think needed explaining, and introduced some elements to the plot that make the whole thing feel a lot more... flat. Specifically, the nature of the aliens, and the continued focus on time travel as an explanation for mysterious happenings, along with the more and more explicitly religious nature of the narrative.

Suffice it to say, as a general opinion: I liked these books more when they were just fun picaresque fantasy/scifi adventure stories. Once we get to the end and it has to Be About Something, it loses some of that sheen of endless possibilities that makes it so intriguing. But I suppose it was inevitable, this is a world that was designed to be destroyed, after all.

There are some interesting parallels with the Book of Genesis that I noticed in retrospect. This is an end-of-the-world story that mirrors the beginning of the world. It is "Eschatology and Genesis" in one, after all. One fun one I just realized the other day: the exarchs are nephilim. If the aliens in this world actually represent the divine, then the product of aliens and humans would be half-divine monsters. This explains a) why they're held in such contempt by the story as untrustworthy and b) why they're specifically noted to be very tall. They're giants!

The reveal about the true nature of the aliens really fell flat for me. That is the precise point where my interest in learning more about an infinitely deep and wondrous world runs into the specific ideological project of the author.

In fact, it's two reveals, and I don't like either of 'em. One back in book 3 where we find out that the hierodules are not, in fact, monstrous creatures of diverse form, but actually all supremely beautiful and beyond perfect superhumans, the ones that Severian described in the garden in book 2. Far less interesting than just having a bunch of weird aliens.

The other is that they're from a previous iteration of the universe, and were "perfected" by humanity through the same process that they are now enacting upon huamnity in this universe. This just feels like breaking down the metaphor and saying that they're God and this is now a tiresome theodicy. Trying to logically prove the existence of a loving God, reminds me of my philosophy of religion class way back in community college. Seems to be a very Catholic preoccupation, so no great surprise there.

The interesting thing is that this story also has some Lovecraftian monsters living under the ocean, trying to gain dominion over humanity for... some reason. It makes the whole thing feel more Manichaean, there's a good god and an evil god, both seemingly equally powerful, fighting over the soul of humanity.

There's also these indications of like... having to make deals with some external factions to get access to energy weapons. Like there's the faction of hierodules who are time traveling around and are interested in uplifting humanity to perfection, and then there are just regular ol' aliens who are messing with us for some unknown reason.

Perhaps the idea is that these other aliens, Abaia and whatnot, know that humanity is actually the center of the universe, the most important species who have this special connection with the time travelers. Humanity has a special connection with the divine (hierodules) that nobody else gets. But, in a very Catholic way, that's not necessarily a good thing, and causes them a lot of suffering.

I suppose the whole explanation that "oh all of this pain and depravation is for your own good as part of a divine plan" thing just rubs me the wrong way. It's not convincing to me, and it never has been. This series brings that whole argument into new genre trappings, instead of a vague righteousness we have giving the very Earth a new chance at survival with a new sun, instead of a distant and mysterious God we have aliens who have clear motives and concrete existence, etc. That doesn't make it any more convincing, though it does make it easier to grapple with, I suppose.

Anyway, enough about hierodules.

I found the resolution of Severian's personal story very satisfying. Tying up all the mysteries of his parentage with a neat little bow, the explanation of how the Autarchy works, all of that stuff, it was very good. Especially the way that the next Autarch could just be any random person off the street. It's a very cool idea.

My favorite thing is how it recasts the rest of the book, knowing that it was written with a thousand extra eyes looking over Severian's life, peer-reviewing it. It explains so much about the clinical, detached tone, and the judgments he was making about himself and his own actions along the way. It's going to be very fun to re-read these books with that knowledge in the future.

I agree with the Shelved by Genre crew about the depiction of the Ascians: the stuff that was added later, with the guy in the hospital, is much more interesting than the just out-and-out weird racism we see later in the book. That felt very flat and stupid, like the villains in Narnia books. The rulers are nothing but pure evil and will to dominate, the uderlings are either resilient victims of circumstance or mindless drones, etc etc. Just not that interesting compared to the rest of the world building in these books.

Really, it's just the old "those people are BRAINWASHED VICTIMS OF IDEOLOGY, not like me, the smart and independent thinker" thing, but blown out to the biggest possible size in a fantasy genre fashion.

I am completely and utterly uninterested in theories about who is a clone or a robot or a secret time traveler. I just do not care. Things like that feel like... they're just not part of the story. The idea of clones gets introduced, but it's deployed in one very specific way.

This is a fictional story, you could come up with any theories about it, and they'd all be equally valid. I could concoct some sort of theory that Severian was actually corrupted by Abaia along the way and is going to undermine the mission of the hierodules, or that he was secretly replaced with a Jonas-like robot, or that the Autarch was every character that he met on his journey, etc etc. It's kinda fun in its own way, but it never feels worth arguing about?

That reminds me, there's one thing that kind of annoyed me on the podcast sometimes: they explained the ambiguity, but didn't say their own read. Like, "here's the thing, it could be X or Y, how interesting!" Well, give me an argument. Whaddaya think? Part of that is being poisoned by future knowledge, even of the fifth and final book and maybe even that whole other series of prequel books Gene wrote, but whatever. Just a little irritating, not a big deal.

Overall, I liked it a lot. Mostly for the world and the characters, the text itself, not the meta elements. I'm not interested in how this is actually about how an author treats his characters in fiction or whatever. It's just a cool scifi world. I'd love to see extended visions of it, and I suppose I have in things like Caves of Qud.

Can't wait for Earthsea!

[champagnepodiums]

Do I remember right that you talked about this case?

https://www.vox.com/culture/23619617/delphi-murders-updates-reddit-true-crime?fbclid=PAAabEL-CXqQAgxTnBgWVytsnxqdLRimeYMAFYR4kxD8YJ-XSKqOCJsaqH2lQ

OH so it was actually the Moscow Idaho murders that I bitched talked about BUT that was a really good article and I definitely have a few thoughts on it.

I think the author does a really good job of showing the messiness of "true crime".

She doesn't really outright say it, but I really didn't appreciate that she implied that the police in Delphi (which is also something I had read about the Moscow murders/how the police handled that case too) were the reason that the true crime community went through the lengths that it did with the wild theories and accusations.

I think the thing that gets lost in the true crime community (and to this author possibly) is that first and foremost, the police's goal is obviously to figure out who committed the crime but also, they have to find the evidence to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that this person committed the crime to secure the proper conviction. Like above all else, that is their job.

And often, releasing information about the case and the leads they are pursuing would be detrimental to the above goal. This does include giving the family updates (it's mentioned that one of the mothers criticized the perceived lack of movement in the case).

Investigations can take so much time. I cannot stress that things like toxicology and DNA processing can take 6-8 weeks AT LEAST. It's not instant. People truly do think that police agencies should be able to solve crimes with completely unknown perpetrators in a few days but that's not how it works and really? That's not how it should work either. And while it sucks that this means that families have to wait in the dark and wonder if their loved one has been forgotten by law enforcement, if the end result is a convinction then I think that's a fair trade off (at least to me).

Now, obviously, police fuck up investigations ALL THE TIME. So like I understand the skepticism way more in the Delphi case than I did in the Moscow murders.

The article also talks about how even if the man arrested is convicted, some people will reject the verdict because "He has a point: If there’s anything true crime teaches us, it’s that facts, circumstances, evidence, proof, doubt, and truth are all often in the eye of the beholder... If people start digging they’re going to find warts on every single case."

I think maybe the above is one of the things that I hate the most about true crime. Even when the crime is solved, the true crime aspect of it is never really over?

And I really hate that for the families of victims because, for them, it'll never really be over. And it doesn't help that the large majority of the true crime community do not give one flying fuck about the fact that these crime impact real people and that it is SO fucking easy to compound on the grief and for what? Entertainment? Because I'm sorry, armchair detectives rarely solve cases.

I have some personal experience in the realm of being hurt by the true crime community so maybe that is why I feel so strongly about the way the true crime community treats those personally impacted by a crime. I think I've talked about before but when my grandfather was a child, he was a part of a group of children who accidentally found the body of a young girl and that experience had a profound impact on his life and in turn on my own life. But it's a weird thing because like he didn't know the victim in life so it's like a weird in-between of being involved/impacted without being the victim/family of the victim. ANYWAYS that murder is technically unsolved and it was covered on a very popular podcast and the host just really fucked up the details specifically around the body being found and that just HURT because like that changed my grandfather's life and by extension, my mom's life and my life and now my son's life and this podcast host couldn't bother to get the details right (and then when i reached out she argued with me about it and refused to change anything so).

I just saw your other message saying that you realized it wasn't the same case but nonetheless I am very glad that you sent it because it was a really interesting article to read!

[jayconner-raisingprivatemoney]

How to Use Private Money More Than Once at the Same Time - Real Estate Investing Minus the Bank

Private Money Academy Conference:

Free Report:

Join the Private Money Academy: 

“We're All In The Banking Business, Just On The Wrong Side Of The Desk.” - Mark Willis

On Raising Private Money we’ll speak with new and seasoned investors to dissect their deals and extract the best tips and strategies to help you get the money!

Today we have Mark Willis! Mark Willis, CFP® is a man on a mission to help you think differently about your money, economy, and future. Mark is a CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™, a three-time #1 Best Selling Author, and the owner of Lake Growth Financial Services, a financial firm in Chicago, Illinois.

As co-host of the Not Your Average Financial Podcast™, he shares some of his strategies for investing in real estate, paying for college without going broke, and creating an income in retirement you will not outlive.

Mark works with people who want to grow their wealth in safe and predictable ways, become their own source of financing, and create tax-free retirement income.

After graduating with six figures of student loan debt and discovering a way to turn his debt into real wealth as he watched everybody lose their retirement savings and home equity in 2008, he knew that he needed to find a more predictable way to meet his financial objectives and those of his clients.

Over the years, he has helped hundreds of his clients regain control of their financial future and build their businesses with proven, tax-efficient financial solutions unknown to most financial gurus. He has become known as “Not Your Average Financial Planner!”

Timestamps:

0:01 - Raising Private Money with Jay Conner

1:18 - Today’s Guest: Mark Willis

1:58 - Not Your Average Financial Planner!

3:55 - What Is Private Money?

5:30 - We Have To Be Our Own Financial Planners

7:26 - Private Money Is A Win-Win Scenario

9:15 - Private Lender vs. The Bank

14:15 - Jay’s Free Money Guide: https://www.JayConner.com/MoneyGuide

15:15 - The Bank On Yourself System

22:33 - Do You Need A High Credit Score?

23:32 - Can You Use Your Retirement Funds On The Bank On Yourself System

29:46 - What Is A Good Client?

31:44 - Connect With Mark Willis: https://www.KickstartWithMark.com

32:19 - What Is Infinite Banking?

Private Money Academy Conference:

Free Report:

Join the Private Money Academy: 

Have you read Jay’s new book: Where to Get The Money Now?

It is available FREE (all you pay is the shipping and handling) at

https://www.JayConner.com/Book

What is Private Money? Real Estate Investing with Jay Conner

Jay Conner is a proven real estate investment leader. He maximizes creative methods to buy and sell properties with profits averaging $67,000 per deal without using his own money or credit.

What is Real Estate Investing? Live Private Money Academy Conference

YouTube Channel

Apple Podcasts:

[constructionaccounting]

551: Recognizing The Value Of Construction Contractors In Our Daily Lives

This Podcast Is Episode 551, And It's About Recognizing The Value Of Construction Contractors In Our Daily Lives

I was taking a moment to reflect on the challenges for the Pilgrims coming to America. They decided to make the journey with no guarantee of success. To build homes, plant crops, and take care of animals. Then, later, everyone chose to move West by wagon train, horse, or on foot. I am grateful for them! I think about my Grandparents and my Great Grandparents. What was life like when they were children? Where did they come from, and how did they get to where they were?

The family's oral history seems so inadequate. My father shared so much, but now it looks like so little. Be glad for the simple things we take for granted:

Going to the grocery store, deli, or restaurant for dinner

Living indoors with electricity and indoor plumbing

Driving a car

Crossing the water on a bridge or ferry

Modern times. I am all for living in the city with the gas station and grocery store just down the street. I appreciate reliable electricity, and tree contractors trim powerlines year-round to help prevent outages. I am grateful for the linemen who repair power lines during a storm so we have electricity.    

Please note: The offer does not apply to Outsourced Accounting, Bookkeeping Review, or any Consultation and Training products; you can, however, use it to purchase any course or monthly subscription classes in Construction Accounting Academy

  Thank You, Contractors, for going to work so the rest of us can stay home safe.   

Thank you to the road crews, police, firemen, linemen, tree crews, plumbers, and electricians who work when the news says "Stay Home" and to all the other contractors and emergency services I have not mentioned.

Contractors Make Our Lives Better

Contractors build and maintain the things that make our lives better. They built the factories where the factory workers work. The rancher and farmer, whom you don't think about as contractors, construct and repair buildings and fences and maintain equipment. They learn to be jacks of all trades, raise crops and animals, and battle the elements. Heat, wind, rain, snow, forest fires, or grass fires – they see it first—the more remote their location, the more diverse their skills.   

Why did you decide to become a Construction Contractor?

Fast money, easy work, few hours, or all those reasons? Yes, contractors can make much money in this industry. Fast, however, is a relative term.

Definition of Fast Money

Collecting a job deposit is designed to lock down the job and buy materials. While using your client's money to start the project is always a good idea, that doesn't mean you have money to party heartily, buy a bunch of tools, or buy that brand-new truck you want. 

The money will fly out of the checkbooks with everyday business expenses without extra help. 

If you spend your job deposits in this manner, you get into a cycle of "Borrow from Peter to pay Paul." (author unknown) This was a favorite phrase of the '60s and '70s. What do I mean? Using the deposit from the next job to pay for expenses from the last job is a slippery slope to financial disaster. Another common phrase is "Leverage Is Great Until The Stick Breaks." 

It's like a child's game of musical chairs. When the music stops, someone is without a chair. The same thing happens when the economy turns, as in 2008. Contractors thought (and hoped) the recession would be a slight dip and everything would return to normal by the summer of 2009. That is not what happened for most construction contractors. 

Some construction contractors had lots of work in the pipeline unaffected by the recession.

Many were overconfident and thought other contractors had a hard time because they "just didn't know how to run a business." Unfortunately, those same contractors were badly hurt when their pipeline of jobs ran out.

Definition of Easy Work

Easy work is any job that you know how to do quickly. Preparing Thanksgiving dinner for twenty or more is a simple task for a chef. However, it might be impossible for a college student living in a dorm or shared apartment.

Definition of a Few Hours

Yes, construction contractors can work a few hours every day. Usually, they work twelve hours or more every day of the week. It is only a few hours to:

Take the call

Schedule the appointment

Meet the client

Create the bid

Present the bid

Collect the deposit

Schedule the work

Make a material list

Pick up the materials

Coordinate any employees

Go to the homeowner's house or job site

As you begin the job:

Think, plan, and do the work.

Watch out for children and pets.

Answer the homeowner's questions.

Be polite and make small talk as needed.

Keep working at a pace that compensates for any time spent watching out for children and pets or chatting with the homeowner. The homeowner expects work to be completed on time or ahead of schedule, no matter how many interruptions you or your employees have. 

End of the day – Clean up the job site so it is ready for use this evening or clean and ready for work tomorrow. Pick up all your tools and materials (mobilize and demobilize)

Meet with the homeowner to discuss the rest of the project.

Assure them all is going well. Make notes of possible change orders or add-ons. Do not forget to price out change orders. Homeowners remember that unless you agree to a price reduction in writing, you are not obligated to reduce the price.

The increase in scope is never forgotten. You Promised To Do [fill in the blank]. If you think any changes are omitted, wait; you will hear a grownup impersonating a preschooler wanting a cookie. Water on the stone is an understatement.  

Like most Construction Contractors, you feel like you are waving the money as it goes by. Rest assured, it is true in Washington State, where contractors collect and pay sales taxes. The tax money is just moving through the checking account. Borrowing State and Federal tax money is very bad. 

The same applies to payroll taxes, except the company must make a company match for Social Security and Medicare, pay state unemployment insurance and state worker’s compensation, and obtain a contractor’s license, contractor’s liability insurance, bond, and other specialty licenses.

The business of being in business as a construction contractor involves:

Keeping track of a lot of paperwork

Filling out and filing government forms

Paying taxes 

Financials are essential for filing annual federal taxes, whether you are a sole proprietor, LLC, or S-corp. The individual reports are for the benefit of the construction contractor.

Are you making money?

Which job? – Did you like that particular type of job?

Do you go into any job knowing it will barely break even? 

Are you passing out business cards or flyers to the neighbors of your current or past jobs?

Are you driving long distances between jobs?

Final thoughts

You couldn’t change yesterday; you could only review it and think about what you could do today. And how can you have a better tomorrow? Tiny changes can make a big difference. Sometimes, taking a pause is the right decision to make.

Money makes the world go round. It is hard to buy gas or groceries with hope and a promise. It is not unreasonable to expect to be paid for your work. Contractors like you bring value to everyone's life you touched. I am rooting for your success and wish you and yours the best in everything that comes your way.

PS 

We offer free resources to help you save time and money that you can download and print now. 

About The Author:

Sharie DeHart, QPA, co-founded Business Consulting And Accounting in Lynnwood, Washington. She is the leading expert in managing outsourced construction bookkeeping and accounting services companies and cash management accounting for small construction companies across the USA. She encourages Contractors and Construction Company Owners to stay current on their tax obligations and offers insights on managing the remaining cash flow to operate and grow their construction company sales and profits so they can put more money in the bank. Call 1-800-361-1770 or sharie@fasteasyaccounting.com

  Check out this episode about Contractors Marketing - Accounting - Production (M.A.P.)!