#WHY DOES HE SAY ALL THIS DUMB SHIT...
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AHSJSGDJQGEJWGEJQHEJWHEHWHEJQHSJWHSJW I HATE HIM I HATE HIM I HA-
#ash rambles đ#WHY DOES HE SAY ALL THIS DUMB SHIT...#ahem. um.#i dont have the weight of destiny on my shoulders... but i wouldnt say no to a handsome knight- AHEM#stupid idiot... i've been thinking about him so often as of late#i wanna kiss him so bad!!!!!#it always makes me flutter how he loves being ash's knight#he knows that she's strong. she literally shot him that one time-#but he still loves being her knight and protecting her đđ that's the part that always gets me#AHSJAHDJHWJDHWJE maybe i love him or whatever#*makes my heart flutter#sorry y'all im tired LMAAOOO#... clearly not too tired to be a down bad idiot though
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âArthur can totally dress himself heâs just spoiledâ why are you giving him that much credit
#no but seriously#this bitch has every symptom#being able to consistently dress independently would genuinely be a miricle at this point#he has constant meltdowns easily manipulated anger issues#admits that Merlin is his ONE AND ONLY FREIND#so thatâs definitely a social deficit if Iâve ever seen one#heâs dumb as a tone of bricks and I can say that bc I am also#and noble insest WAS THE NORM.#you wanna know why king George lost amercia?#HIS BRAIN WAS FUCKED UP. HIS GENES WERE FUXKED UP#but like#anyways#key word constantly dressings himself#bc every disabled person will tell you that abilities are such a spectrum#back when I couldnât dress myself it fluxuated wether I could or couldnât and to what degree until i eventually couldnât do it at all#also arthur can technically do it#but rare times and even when he does itâs shit#sometimes doing a task is technically possible but it takes 25 years off your life#bc of stress and just. god itâs so complicated and overwhelming#and even if you DO it itâs not even worth it#bc itâs shit#I will die on this hill btw#from my own little galaxy world#merlin#bbc merlin#merlin bbc
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you will NEVER see anyone writing paragraphs after paragraphs hating on keefe like they do with sophie.
#nah im sorry but i need to get this off my chest#how is it that SOPHIE always gets more hate compared to other characters or yk the ACTUAL ANTAGONISTS of the story?#why do ppl keep bringing up the fact that âshe has too many powersâ or âall the boys love herâ TO SHIT ON HER#is sophie's character perfect? no#should sophie's writing be criticized? honestly yes take it up with shannon#but you ask a dumb bitch why they hate sophie and they'll start giving the funniest reasons ever#and it really makes you understand that these bitches will never say any of this if she was a boy#why do y'all expect so much from sophie#she does one mistake and everyone comes for her#she tries to do something and everyone comes for her#she tries to be friendly and everyone comes for her#she gets together with fitz and keefe and everyone comes for her#she manages to use weapons and fight properly and everyone comes for her#she shows a little emotion and everyone comes for her#hell she DOESN'T DO ANYTHING and EVERYONE COMES FOR HER.#âwhy did you mention keefeâ oh bc yk he does a million mistakes and no one bats an eye#you can just clearly see the way this fandom treats sophie and keefe#kotlc#keeper of the lost cities#sophie foster
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local man haunts (me) open practise yet again more news at 11
#txt#what an experience#i didnt go alone this time which means shenanigans heightened by 20#and by that i mean we were by the glass drinking mate (that security thankfully let us bring in)#and ___ kept going (lifts mate up to the glass) quieres? to all the players that skated by#and i had to just go STOP THAT#and they went they dont want our mate hmph what do they know about mate and i went. well thats the thing. they dont đđ#theres was a bunch of kids next to me which meant a lot players over to our side and ekky trucked over#and knocked the glass w his stick on a driveby and scared the shit out of me I ALMOST DROPPED MY MATE he had this shit eating grin#maffhew also kept doing little toodle-loo waves at the kids behind him it was so cute đđđ#but anyways i think its so funny ___ kept focusing on ekky too and i didnt realise why until they just drop the bombshell of#âthey remind me of your brotherâ and i went âDONT FUCKING SAY THAT WHAT THE FUCK MAN DONT SAY SUCH SACRILEGEâ#the rest of the convo was in spanish and i dont know how to like fully convey đŠđ· banter in eng but it roughly went#âno he does. he has the same dumb face when he starts shit (because he kept bodily bumping into boqy and forsy)#the same 'was that me? did i do that?' troublemaker face. hes a shit stirrer but never answers to it. hes sleazy in that way.#he has the same beard too dont you see itâ#and then i promptly spent the whole time going god he is just like my older brother oh this is a horrifying revelation oh god#anyways they kept saying look at his dumb face look at it just like your brother the whole time in spanish when he crept near#and i had to go SHUT UP PLEASE HE CAN HEAR YOU to which they snorted and went you said its fine if we spoke spanish here theyre not gonna#understand us and i was like OKAY BUT IM SURE 11 YEARS HERE HES GONNA PICK UP#SOMETHING AND WE KEEP CURSING SO FOR MY SAKE CAN YOU SHUT UP#mikksy and schmidty were super playful with eo. tuomo ruutu kept messing w mikksy. and ekky was like a damn bumper car bumpin everyone#maffhew ofc was very dramatic when he couldnt get a goal in against knighter and he did the horse headshake in front of us#and i went âyou can tell whos number 19 because hes the most dramatic person on the ice alwaysâ#ekky was super vocal i know he wanted to practise against the empty net but aj was practising tipins and he goes#MOVE OUT OF THE WAY. MOVE OUT OF THE WAY. and aj so confused just moves like ???#and ekky notches one in goes over to him and waves his glove at him to move#also dmen + lundy were practising on my side of the ice afterwards (lundy ekky uvis kuli. kuli was practising solo. lundy was feeding ekky#for some slapshots uvis got some passes in with them) and anyways i did not fucking realise swaggy was still out because i was so focused on#the dmen until he shot a puck straight at my face and like man i know its not personal but damn did it feel personal with the lookback
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Trying out this whole "animation" thing, it's kind of a small niche community though so idk
#bandit's doodles#no fandom tags today#It's all me baby#That's what I'm talkin about!!#who needs fanart (me) when you can have critter#but honestly self love is important so I'll say this is fanart for myself#Be careful I might get all parasocial with myself#Stupid joke I'm sorry#i was just imagining the whole time I was doing this#what if you saw him climb through your window and then pull this#Honestly I think I'd flick him out and see if he bounces on the ground#Spoiler he does#Cartoon logic and whatnot#Squashed by an anvil and gets a big bump on his head and that's it#thats why he's on a windowsill btw#This was my first time doing proper animation#Ive done little animatics before that I just keep to myself#But never like#Frame by frame animating#so if this is stupid that's why lmao#i like it though#Making my little sona look stupid and dumb is my favorite thing#Good for releasing my pent up idiocy#Project that shit onto the funny doodle cat yeah#anyways new wonderlust ep today (it's midnight on Saturday rn)#so probably expect something that related soon knowing me#dude looking at these tag walls make me realize#If I talked to people I'd be the most heinous double texter known to mankind#a force to be reckoned with#I had another tag but I ran out of tag space so this is goodbye for now I suppose lmao
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Iâm finding that the laziest moments of Doctor Whoâs writing are the âretroactive twistsâ - when the show runner reveals something happened way back over there, in the past, before they were even running the show. And we swear it happened, way over there, far back, and you didnât see it because of reasons but itâs definitely been happening! And it totally makes sense and I absolutely didnât just pull it out my ass to justify my paper thin plotline! All this kind of writing does is make me miss self contained season length plots. Weâve had people complaining that Moffat was guilty of the âthis thing is big and scary and itâs going to happen, oh god itâs showing up, weâre going to discover what it truly isâŠ.. next season!!!!!!â plotline (and yes. he was. twelve is my fav doctor but yeah Moffat loved a mysterious horse and a big stick) but now suddenly when RTD gets out his own mysterious horse and a big stick, itâs got to be genius! everything is eventually going to make sense! and weâre absolutely not being had by a man who used to be able to write this show and is now a hack!
#FUCK OFF RUSSELL#write a good show or go home christ alive#itâs just nostalgia glasses. we could get an episode where all 10 does is sit in a daybed and list the symptoms of shingles#and a lot of people on this website would be falling over themselves to try say that yeah itâs not good! itâs not well written! but itâs fun#and obviously thatâs all doctor who needs to be. fun! not good or interesting or well written or good scifi but fun. just mediocre mush fun.#im sorry that you love dave 10nant so much (name censor bc tbf this ainât his fault heâs just here)#that you cannot handle admitting that RTD is bad at his job now or that bringing 10 back as 14 was a shit idea#and that plotline was boring and kinda dumb#but itâs true. itâs gone downhill. RTD does not know what this show is anymore#and I frankly think heâs gone from a fanboy being able to write his dw dreams and make them episodes#from a man who views this show as his little pet project that sprung him into success#the best episodes are written by people who love this show. adore it. think of it as something big and grand#and are so thrilled that they get to add part of themselves to it with their stories and words#itâs why he used to be good. and now he doesnât really care anymore and it shows.#itâs why my favourite doctor is my favourite doctor (and probably why people adore 9 + 10)#because you can feel the love exuding from every performance. itâs a childhood dream. thereâs not time to waste a second of it.#sorry but this season was bad and the overarching story was bad#and the Christmas special is going to be bad. because it hinges on the idea weâre going to âfind out more next time!â#shut up and tell me now. or at least in the season. âooh rubyâs snow power will be explained next seasonâ NO! EXPLAIN IT NOW#doctor who#dw#dw negativity#rtd2 era#rtd2#rtd
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love how there are pretentious video essays that just repeat the book and meander and ramble about house of leaves. it's what zampanĂł would have wanted. it is not, however, what I want
#anyway i finished the main portion of the book#all i have left is the poems and a few other small things i think? ive read pelafinas letters#im thinking of getting the full book of her letters#but also they severely messed with my head so we'll see#i will say. i do get why ppl say the book is pretentious and frustrating#there was a lot of stuff where i couldnt tell if it was supposed to be satire or if it was genuinely just that dense and pretentious#and a lot of the codes were rly obtuse imo?#like... idk. some of them were super obvious like the sos stuff or pelafina outright saying what to do#but others like. man how am i supposed to know johnny waxing poetic about pussy was coded#i mean that one is also pointed out though much later but i know i missed a lot just like it that werent pointed out#and ive heard theres a lot of shit where the message you get is just danielewski????? which gonna be real. kinda dumb.#but i did also really enjoy the book#there was a lot of stuff in it that was just so compelling or poignant or whatever other word#the minotaur stuff is good (ofc id say that though i love me some minotaur themes)#also a lot of the scenes with johnny just...... christ#idk how ppl say to skip them hes so fascinating#yeah i could do with him talking about his possibly hallucinated sex life a bit less but also his story is just plain interesting#i still think about the part where the girl he was talking to runs over a dog they had picked up........ it was fucking chilling#and his hallucinations of dying are so descriptive in just the right way to get under my skin#the uncertainty with him and his family..... did pelafina try to kill him? did his father just send her away for being a bit too overbearin#over an accident? was there something else? what was the deal with his foster family? with lude? gdansk man and kyrie?#how did it get published? who are the editors? why did the band know of the book before it should have been published?#why does his journal section end with a story from a man he admits to making up completely? the doctor from seattle doesnt exist#the chronological end is more hopeful with him saying things will be okay but then he puts a previous entry after that?#i think the burning of the book parallels the story nicely#johnny said his piece; he nurtured the book as much as he could; but it was hurting him and he had to give up on it#idk!#this book does make me feel a lil dumb ngl
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Like I'm not one of those story "critics" who will nitpick the smallest inconsistency and call it a plot hole that ruins the whole story. I'm okay with inconsistencies and even the occasional plot hole if it ends up producing a story that's interesting, gripping, and brings up interesting things.
The problem is that suspension of disbelief only stretches so far. And secondly, stuff like character drama and themes are only as strong as the plot that supports them. If the plot is full of contrivances, plot holes, and really stupid things that make it feel like the author is just forcing something to happen to move the story along, then the themes and character drama become much less convincing.
#squiggposting#anyways i do like problematic idw op and i do like it when he has enemies and ppl who don't trust him#but not when the plot to make ppl hate him is stupid as shit and barely makes any sense#or when optimus does something mildly dubious and people act like he personally tortured their families and then murdered them#or like when characters are oddly hostile to OP/the autobots but are perfectly fine working with far worse ppl#like how the humans were all 'fuck the autobots theyre evil' but were fine with helping the cons build a fucking base???#after the decepticons already killed 1 billion humans??? including soundwave who is one of their main liasons???#if the humans really didn't trust the decepticons then why didn't they just say 'fuck you you can't build a base in our solar system'#or like that stupid publicity plot point about how OP 'abandoned' jazz when like.#so you're telling me OP can't defend jazz for killing one. ONE cop in self defense#but it's not bad publicity for him to associate with soundwave who. let me repeat. was literally on the ground slaughtering humans in AHM#spike even knew about how that entire situation with the cop was a trap laid by megtron but somehow that never came up in the whole comic#it's just so dumb man like it feels sometimes more like its an IDW OP hate train and actual logic is secondary to making OP look like an as#also galvs being all like 'that's my boy' when OP annexed earth when galv is a racist boomer grandpa who kills organics for sports#i refuse to believe that guy would be impressed by anything less than OP personally murdering a human. not making them part of cybertron's#gov. you know? it's just silly#it's part of why i've been putting off rereading barber's comics because it was weird and contrived the first time#and i don't really want to put myself through rereading it again just to have to suffer through shitty plot again#so many things in that series couldve been genius if they were written in a plot that wasn't aggressively mid tier
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Captain Boomerang Mugshots because these are pictures in my phone that I keep forgetting to post
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#And because I feel sad and dumb now#Owen gets everything anymore... :(#He's not even Captain Boomerang in the comics now and he gets to be in shows and shit#The one live action show appearance Digger got was so fucking bs#All his current comic appearances are BS too#Like... Yay... He showed up on one page all the way in the background on a computer screen and it was just his head/s#Yay... Wally's daughter Irey vaguely mentions him in passing/s#Yay... There's a statue of him in the Flash Museum.../s#Yay... It's another statue of him in the Flash Museum.../s#Just what I was looking for... An actor in a commercial playing him. That's exactly what I was looking for/s#captain boomerang#george harkness#digger harkness#This man deserves so much love and does get any in or out of canon anymore#Like... I'm one of 3 people giving this man love/hj#Sure he gets to be in the upcoming game but like... Nobody has anything good to say about the game#It's all whine whine whine complain complain complain#The one thing he'll actually get to be in and he'll be physically in and everyone wants it to fail it seems#And why? Because of some cosmetic only battle pass???#Like... Nobody cares man.#It doesn't affect gameplay#And there's going to be a free tier anyway so why tf do you care#And boomerangs aren't going to be his main weapon in the game :(#And if you want to complain about my stupid fucking tags#Shut the fuck up and just block me#It's my blog and I'm allowed to vent in the tags if I want to#It's not like anyone's going to even like this post anyway otherwise than like... The 2 other og Boomerang fans#And even then there's a chance they won't like it
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i think i would have gone loco if jo and aoki got to meet up just once after ichi breaks through to him like. the damage to my psyche id have wouldve been immeasurable, irreparable even
#snap chats#im at the vet waiting for my dog please listen to shit thats been tormenting me for months#finally releasing all of my drafted thoughts im ill and im free#srry i know i talked bout it already in todays ask but im still thinking about it#this is also inspod by one of my twitter mutuals saying aokiâs death was the only foreseeable path for him like girl i thought we were fam#but no đ ill stand by forever that him dying was legit so dumb and unnecessary idc idc đ#anyway. let me begin. because its not as if aoki wasnt conscious of jo constantly tailing him#take a shot every time i quote the Lost Dog comment its just such a good line and just exposes jo its my everything ok leave me alone#but please just like. in the weird timeline where jo and aoki did get to be cellmates- or at least were in the same cell block right#id throw up and cry if aoki looked at jo differently that day. like it doesnt help that joâs without all his flash and flair#hes just in slacks and his hairs all tussled and he just looks So Normal. like hes Not a murderer#as soon as that warden bring aoki in i know jo movin to see him with all the love and concern only a father got#aokid never say sorry i just know hed be awkward as hell in joâs presence now#like if aoki really did take ichis words to heart and starts to actually see jo as his family and as someone who cares about him for him#id kill myself on the spot thats why they had to kill aoki#no id die and throw up if aoki just outright asks jo if he does care about him or something like that#jo gonna need to muster up every ounce of his will to say he does not because he doesnt but because hes Just Like That. hes a hard nut#but he loves his kid more than anything and im gonna tear my organs out thinking about it#jo your kid sucks but ik you still love him thats the worst part#i wanna write or draw somethin with them in jail together so bad but i always get distracted#and again i have comms to do today.#OH BUT SPEAKING OF MY DUMB ASS DOG GOT LYME DISEASE đđđ#they said he should be fine in like six months if weâre good with meds but still.... this is lame.....#ALSO I FOUND OUT MY POM MIX IS PREDOMINANTLY A PAPILLON..... thats fucked up yo butterfly dog...#ok im gonna go be insane idk how much else i could elaborate on this bye bye
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Marineford part 4..... is there a life after this.....
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Oh my god.... he died standing up with his pride (and his back) intact bc ace died protecting it. And the panel showing the same tattoo ace has. Ace's tattoo is fucking destroyed omg..... Should we all kill ourselves now..... in the end ace died protecting his brother and his father
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JIMBEIIII đđ I LOVE YOU JIMBEIIII đđđđ
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I think up until egghead we had forgotten about this because we haven't seen this man since marineford.... this is a background plot but now with law in the state that blackbeafd left him.... I need to see more
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...... luffy I will actually merge through the screen and kill him I swear he will NOT touch a hair in your head trust me on this
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Oh NOW sengoku moves.... not when whatever the fuck blackbeard was doing with whitebeard happened!!! Real smart man
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Crocodile is just being effective.... UNLESS.... (he really hates the marines or just wants luffy to be alive for SOME reason....) wait WHAT IF crocodile was a proxy from the rev army to take out the king of alabasta (you know they get rid of monarchs that is factual and true) and he went rogue for some reason.... that would be his connection to dragon and maybe he regrets it so he helps luffy....
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HUH?!
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Another for the buggy hall of faces
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"He needs immediate treatment!" Law waiting for his cue underwater: đ
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This is so good... sengoku wanting this to happen to message the pirates that this era is over and both the marines and the pirates coming off more radicalized (?? Does that word work) out of it
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Buggy akdhaksjka
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Garp can't believe his fucking eyes akdjaksjks I can't either he looks so ugly..... sorry....
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Garp is going to pop a vein akdhaksjs
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Hancock â€ïž thank you queen....
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I had to do a double take yeah....
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Kinda crazy that law helped him so luffy would owe him a favor later but luffy didn't give a shit about it then lmao
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Just read the chapter name luffy and ace and hat to stop aldjaksnsos I AM SO COOKED
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I wonder grandma nyon đ€đ€
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Maybe it was a dream đ¶ someone hold me please
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Luffy remembering the sorry you didn't get to save me line is INSANE I KNEW THAT WAS CRAZYYYYY AND THE BOOM AT HIS DEAD BODY HITTING THE FLOOR AND THE BLOOD ON HIS HANDS!!! GET OFF ME!!! MY GOOOD
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Oda has been doing these types of flashback panels intercutting with current ones for a while and they all kill me I can't deal with them
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Seeing him little again made me choked up omg I need a lobotomy
#jimbei and luffy getting hit.... it really shows how akainu just punches people on the back tho. coward and loser and fuckass in general kys#smoker saying 'this isnt justice'.... yeah... be ready for punk hazard#i am going to say it shanks hair looks so bad in here idk why some of you lust for him that much....#omg after stopping the war at marineford and telling the world gov about luffys fruit.... what if shanks.... is a centrist......#nevermind maybe koby is the true centrist#well shanks coming in to save him only serves my theory more.... they are both centrists... defending the status quo#<- im kidding but something about him is off.... he is also waiting for the man roger was waiting for but he seems nefarious for some reaso#âïžâïž shanks was fighting kaido to protect whitebeard before the war started#i know why shanks didnt do it but he should have cut off blackbeards head call me a hater or dumb or smth if you want i will live my truth#marineford war over.... now what....... now for luffy to wake up and suffer.... killing myself tomorrow i guess#oh no fuck the post war flashback arc.... i will NOT make it through that my god.....#kinda crazy that at the end of every big saga luffy dies (kinda does here... at least in spirit and then he dies for reals in wano)#i am scared for the end of it all but with my theory of law makes him immortal and dies instead im calm again akdhakano#the world gov not letting sengoku do his job with the missing prisoners form level 6... that's prob why he left his job akdhkaks#why did doffy kill moria tho.... its never explained at least until when the anime is done i think#i think its truly amazing how oda puts all the stuff with hancock and the heart pirates being on the womens island first#to then give us all the gut punch of luffy reacting to aces death like come on now. and i havent even started reading yet#even jimbei i crying this shit is insane goooooooood#i think we are so lucky oda doesnt kill people ofthen because if every death would be like this i wouldn't make it#like the flashback deaths are one thing and sad enough but this one is on another level and as it should be but christ#read this back in DECEMBER.... another christmas i spend watching ace die.... tradition at this point... and he really suffered more than j#reading one piece#marineford#talking tag
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#feeling conflicted again which seems to be the usual for me these days#having more issues with my friend and at first I was really upset and didnât want to talk to him at all#but now it just feels like a who cares thing because heâs always a flake and kind of a dick sometimes#and he probably doesnât even know why Iâm bothered because he doesnât always think things through#Iâm just tired of trying to talk to him about the same things and having nothing change#and itâs like I donât want to cut off a friend because I have issues with those kinds of things#but I also donât want to keep getting screwed over#I just donât seem to know how to put my foot down or set proper boundaries#so while I want to act like him and just give him a taste of how he makes me feel but I just canât do that#it sounds mean to say that Iâm just a better person than that but it is kinda the truth because I wouldnât ever treat a friend the way he#treats me. like donât say Iâve got a friend and then just go silent when I actually tell you I need help#so itâs like it sucks and I want him to get the point here but I also donât want to go so far or do something that hurts the friendship even#more. I know heâs gonna expect me to talk to him tomorrow since our shifts overlap and I usually go see him in the afternoon beforehand#and he does owe me some money anyway so I need to get that settled. but idk Iâm kinda tired of putting myself out for him when he wonât do#the same thing for me ever. one of those times where I need to learn to set boundaries for real and stick to them#this is all just dumb and I donât like it. I donât want problems with my friend. but I donât want my friend to keep doing this shit either#personal
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#cant believe i spent three years telling myself he was just a guy and i was in love with the idea of him not the real him#and that he was nothing special yada yada yada#and then he had the AUDACITY to come back into my life and prove to me that i was WRONG#and i tried SO HARD to deny it but hes SO GOOD goddamn him#hes sooo kind and thoughtful and smart and gentle and i HATE HIM i want to see him every day for the rest of MY LIFE#i want to make him breakfast!!! do you know how bad it has to be for me to want to make a man ANYTHING?#i want to cook a nice warm breakfast and bring it to him in bed and wake him up gently and all that shit that makes me want to VOMIT#FOR A MAN#i cant stress how fucking out of the ordinary that is for me#and still he wants nothing to do with me!#he cares about me. and he obviously thinks im smart and has a pretty good opinion of me#and theres no doubt hes attracted to me cause he cant treat me like a normal fucking human being and be my friend without hitting on me#but he does not WANT ME#he doesnt eat breakfast! hes always in a rush in the morning so he prefers to just skip it! he wouldnt eat breakfast in bed anyway!#and now that ive finally come to this realisation hes fucking MOVING#and im the only one he told like WHY would he do that when he knows i cant be normal about him!!!#and when i reacted the way that i did to the news he tought i was worried about my promotion of all things#cause yeah hes also my boss in all of this since things were so easy#and im like how can you be the smartest person i know and also so fucking DUMB i dont give a shit about a promotion i want you to STAY#STAY.HERE.WHERE I AM. WHERE I CA MAKE YOU BREAKFAST AND PRETEND I JUST CASUALLY BROUGHT FOOD TO WORK WHEN I BROUGHT IT JUST SO THAT I COULD#OFFER IT TO YOU AND YOU COULD SAY NO. I KNEW YOU WOULD SAY NO AND I STILL WANT YOU TO STAY#and i cant say that to him cause i know he KNOWS and thered be no point but im fucking going craaaazy over this like THIS IS NOT ME#and in all of this i know i deserve better. cause i know hes stringing me along whether hes aware of it or not but im tired of this#this has been going on for five years now. im tired of it#and yet i yearnđ© boy do i yearn#anyway ill be back in a couple of months with the next installment of how this 5y half situationship is fucking over my life#for the time being just#ignore me
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Tw. Bimbo reader, dark content, noncon, dubcon, corruption kink, coercion, creampie, size kink, magic sex toy/onahole/fleshlight, loss of virginity, not proof read
***
Thinking about being a childhood friend of a yandere duo.
You were just so friendly and cute, approaching them with candies in your tiny hands and offering it to them. So kind as you always play with them, and sometimes they would argue who'd be your husband when playing house. They often fought whenever they wanted to play with you but in the end, it always results to sharing you.
Middle school was a little different than Kindergarten. They get more protective when boys try to get close to you, painting them as insufferable brats that only want clout. Being neighbors with the wealthy kids, got you too much attention much to their liking, often getting bullied whenever you finally have some alone time, but this didn't get unnoticed as you wonder why that kid who pushed you on your locker, suddenly have bandage wrapped around his head and his reputation down.
Highschool is where the shift started. You wanted to explore more, finding new friends, and hanging out with other people, and they did not like that. You were just too dumb, they said. Too dumb to realize people manipulating you so that they can get close to them. Do you even realize that the girl from your class only talks to you about them? Dumb girl.
Safe to say, you never had a genuine friend in high school, not like you even had chance to form a deep level of friendship (by people who genuinely wanna be friends with you) by the way they hog all your attention and time.
College is where it gets difficult for them to spend time with you. Different schedules, classes, course. They even insisted you go to the same university as them. It's frustrating how little time you spend together, always with your stupid excuse of "working on an assignment".
Without you around, they definitely have a hard time relieving some tension. They couldn't just walt into your room and steal some panties scoot free without getting into trouble, even though they were star students and had plenty influence over the school. No, no, they won't put their reputation to ruin, they're your perfect best friends.
Despite them being a duo, they were quite different in terms of personality. One is patient and mature, thinking logical and more on the rational side. While the other is playful, outgoing and rash. Both have their charms that got everyone around their fingers. However, they wouldn't sleep with just anyone, no. It's hard to get their dick hard, always imagining your cute face whenever they try to fuck a desperate bitch to finally release some tension.
But your impatient friend had enough of some random girl, high pitch moans that's not yours annoying his ears. It's miserable to even hump his own hand, so hard and cold, different to what he imagine your tight warm cunt to be. This just won't cut it. He needs more, to finally feel your wet insides without you knowing.
So what's a good way to relieve tension?
Some good ol' fleshlight.
The moment it arrived at his doorstep, he straight up bolted to his door. Slamming the door close as he finally gets his hands on the toy after days of waiting. Fuck, he can't wait to use this thing.
It's like the half body sex toy he used to watch in porns. He was quite impressed by the details it had, he gotta give props for that, but that's not what he's after for. After reading the instructions, more like skimming and skipping most of the words. He use lubricant, using plenty of it and spreading it around the artificial pussy lips. Rubbing and feeling the flaps, like how he usually does. It's kinda weird that he's doing this for a toy, but he could just imagine it being your cunt, practicing his moves. After a few moments did he slide his thick finger inside the walls of the toy... How weird, the texture was oddly real, like it was alive. Well, that's probably some mechanic shit that the factory put there or something. This is his first time using a fleshlight and it cost a fortune through some sketchy website so it better be worth it.
***
You jolted in your sit in class, listening to your professor's discussion about physics until you suddenly feel something brushing on your thighs. Your head panning around the room before looking ahead, brushing it off. It was probably the wind.
You yelp when something began rubbing your cunt, earning a few concern looks for you and your professor glancing at you before going back to his discussion. You shrink in your sit, head hanging low as you pressed your lips together. Confused and scared by the phantom touch assaulting your nether region. Clutching your skirt, you try to maintain confused whimpers as the touches didn't stop.
You're scared.
The moment something pushed inside you, you stand up and excuse yourself, running to the nearest restroom. Your feet quick as you open a random stall and sit on the toilet. Your breathing heavy as you shakily lifts your skirt, looking at the wet patch on your panty.
What's happening? Why are you wet? How can something touching you there? You're not imagining this, right?
Your mind raced as you become more terrified. Is a ghost haunting you? Tears pool on your eyes, sniffling as the assault become more aggressive.
***
Fuck, this fleshlight was the best thing he ever bought. How was this even made? Whatever. He continues to pump his thick finger, inserting another one and he jump a bit as he felt the walls suck on his fingers. Damn, it can even do that? Just how realistic can this toy be? He's not complaining though.
He decided to touch the clit earning another tight squeeze. What a sensitive toy. He continues to play, eventually adding another finger. It was weird how the warm walls didn't run out of lube, if this were any normal toy it'd need to be lubricated after few minutes but this toy seems to produce it on its on.
He pulls out his fingers as he inspects the inside, it's undeniable that it's fake but the way it pulsates around nothing makes it a bit questionable on how it works.
Would your cunt also look like that? He could imagine your wrecked heaving face after fingering you. Poor little you never had something inside, let alone this thick fingers. He couldn't wait for the moment he'll ruin you.
***
You're straight up crying as an additional thick sensation pumped your insides. Squeezing your thighs shut, like it's gonna do something to stop the phantom. Everything inside you screams to remove the intrusion but you didn't know how. Opening your legs slightly, your shaky fingers removing your panty to see what's happening inside your cunt... but nothing was there. Only a gape.
Your fingers shifts towards the gape, gasping as the invincible touch was able to touch you yet you couldn't even see or feel it. Squirming uncomfortably, as you open your legs more to try and get "it" out with your fingers. Uselessly grabbing air, whimpering and sobbing as you fail to interrupt with its continuous pumping. Your stomach twisting and an unfamiliar coil was starting to unravel, your breath hitching and legs shaking.
But it's abruptly stop as the phantom pulled away.
Finally, relief and a little bit of disappointment fills your chest. Slumping on the toilet, panting like you run a marathon. You shift a bit as you sit upright, freezing as something thick pokes your entrance.
No way...
Your brain panics, your gaze staring at the way your hole widens and your legs subconsciously spreading more to prepare yourself for the inevitable. You clutch the wall of the stall, each hand gripping the surface. Tears streaming down your face and your cheeks getting hot.
This can't be happening.
You felt the thick thing stretch you open.
***
Something about fucking a fleshlight should embarrass him. But nah, with you in his mind there's nothing to be ashamed. This is just practice to him after all, he'll do this things eventually.
With his heavy cock around his fingers, he taps the opening of the fleshlight. His other hand grips the hip. Rubbing along the slit, he collects lube running on the head of his cock, catching the clit in the process. He lets out a breath, as he finally starts pushing his cock inside.
He's quite big, so he's a bit worried if he'll fit in some shady toy but he's sure he'll fit in you just right, even if he had to force himself in your tiny cunt.
But there's no need for consideration when it comes to a toy.
He sheath inside in one thrust.
Hissing at the way the walls clings to him, tightly wrapping around his cock and pulsating as if rejecting a foreign object. Shit, why does it feel like a virgin?
Warm, wet, and tight. The perfect toy pussy for him, this could even rival a real pussy if he were being honest. No time for adjusting as he starts to thrust. Pounding the onahole, roughly gripping the hips and fucking hard. Shit shit shit why does this feel so good? This stupid toy feels a whole lot better compare to a random slut.
His hips going hard and the way he feels the inside pulsating, sucking all his worth making him groan. Such a tight fake cunt.
He wonder if he can break the toy.
***
With a silent scream, your head jerk up as the big stretch was too sudden for your body to take. Legs wide open as you try to create space for the large object. You sob as quiet as possible, as the phantom starts pounding hard at your sensitive cunt. You want to scream but held back, tears blurring your vision as you pray for it to end.
Whimpering and sobbing was the only thing you can do. Waiting for the thrusting to stop, you teeth bite your lip to stop noise from escaping. It doesn't sound like you at all, it's weird, you're scared and confused.
Your mind tries to think of a distraction, to think of anything but the mysterious assault. How is this even happening? What did you do to deserve this? Why you?
Your breath hitched as you feel the tight coil in your stomach again. Moaning a little as you feel pleasure rising though you. Your hands clasp over your mouth, muffling your noise. You shake your head as the coil gets tighter and tighter, your legs shaking as you stutter words of apology to whoever's doing this.
And it snaps.
Your vision going white, body stiffening and eyes going into the back of your head.
Ah. You never felt this... good before.
It takes you a few minutes to recover. Your limbs feel like jelly, your chest rising up and down in a slow manner, and you greedily gulp air.
You were tired and exhausted but you were glad the assault has stop after that. You groggily starts to lift you panty's up however you felt something dripping down your hole.
... you wonder what it was.
***
After that day, the mysterious phantom would touch you at random times, when you're showering, classes, or even in bed late at night. It was torturous, you were becoming paranoid and it didn't go unnoticed by one of your best friend.
He's helping you study in the library as you'd ask him for his guidance in physics. You would've asked your other friend, but you can just imagine him play with your hair or something along of not really helping you study.
You're breathe hitch as you feel the phantom ghost rubbing your cunt. Shrinking on your sit, uncomfortably rubbing your legs.
"Something bothering you?" He ask, looking a bit concern of your shiftiness.
"O-oh, it's nothing. Just a little tired lately," You reassured, smiling as you pretend to be fine.
His sharp gaze examined your face before dropping the subject, deciding to just help you study.
"If you need something to talk to. I'm right here, ok?"
You smiled forcefully, "I-I will... Thank you."
***
You could never bring yourself to tell someone about it. No one would ever believe you.
You're laying in bed waiting for the phantom, already memorizing the way it'll touch you. You brace for the touch as you can't help but feel helpless. Are you going to live like this your entire life? You don't want to...
But would someone be willing to listen to you? To believe you? You don't wanna bother your best friend, you knew how busy he's gotten the recent days and you're doubtful that he'll even listen to your story when he's the rational one. That means...
Your thoughts were interrupted by the intrusion as you clutch your pillow and close your eyes. You're panting as the phantom starts its routine.
You're scared... You're scared that it's starting to feel good.
No. You don't want to be alone anymore on this.
You need help. Badly.
You shakily gets up from bed, putting some jacket on as you heads towards someone who can help you... At least you believe who will do.
***
"Oh? What's my little darling doing here at this late of night?" He grins as he opened the door with the sight of you.
You fidget with your jacket as you feel small under his gaze, "P-Please help me."
He raised his eyebrow, his grin replacing with a thin line. Yeah, he's playful but he'll never joke around when you're having a problem, "Come inside, we'll talk there, sweetie."
Sitting on his couch, you took a deep breath as you prepare to tell someone about this problem of yours. He won't make fun of you right? He won't be weirded out, right? He's a reliable person and your best friend.
He sits beside you, a serious and concerned expression on his face. It was rare to see him like this, which encourage you to finally tell him.
By the end, you were crying and hiccuping in your hands about the experiences you encounter with that phantom. Feeling his hand rub your back, cooing at you in comfort. He pulls your head to rest on his chest, telling you that everything's going to be fine.
You sob out a thank you, finding relief to finally get it out of your chest.
Unbeknownst to you, the man was smiling.
***
He didn't know if God was on his side. But, he didn't expect this would happen.
Who would've thought that the toy he was playing with was connected with cute lil you?
He didn't believe it at first but the way you described the timing was too much of a coincidence. Sweet little thing, don't worry you won't experience any scary thing from now on.
"Sweetie, do you want me to chase that scary invisible phantom away?" He cups your cheeks in his hands, locking gaze with you.
You sniffle before nodding, "Y-Yes, please..."
He gave you a toothy smile before gently pushing you down on his couch. His fingers swiping away your tears, "Listen to me, ok? I need you to trust me on this." His nose touching with yours as he leans close.
"O-ok... I trust you."
Dumb little girl.
You shouldn't have said that.
Now you've sealed your fate.
***
He wonders what was going on with you back when he helped you study in the library. Something was very off about you, and you were clearly uncomfortable to brought it up.
He thinks of you very often even when he's busy and swarmed with school works. Sometimes, getting frustrated to even continue and wants to just go to your place. He massages his aching temple, resting on his chair before a box caught his attention.
Oh yeah, that stupid guy gave him that a few weeks ago.
He recalls their conversation about it, saying that it'll help him release some stress. Well, he's plenty stressed now so why don't he test it out now?
He saunters to the box, sitting on the floor to unravel it. Only to be surprised by the object inside it.
An onahole...
If he was his usual self he would've flung this across the room and throw it to the garbage bin. But sometimes he needs to be relieve as well, plus he's a man too,
He's not that picky too.
This'll do for him.
A temporary replacement while thinking of your cunt.
#gojo satoru x reader#lovesick#dark content#yandere x y/n#yandere x reader#yandere genshin x reader#yandere genshin#yandere genshin impact#yandere honkai star rail#yandere hsr#yandere jjk#yandere jujutsu kaisen#yandere x darling#yandere x female reader#yandere suguru geto#yandere suguru#yandere megumi#yandere yuji#yandere kaveh#yandere alhaitham#yandere cyno#yandere tighnari#yandere childe#yandere zhongli#yandere gojo#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#gojo smut#hsr smut#jjk smut
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katsuki is and forever will be a massive baby.
and itâs all your damn fault, so he says.
you hadnât even said anything bad. all you'd said was that he looked even more handsome today then he usually did. and he'd looked at you like you grew an extra head, and now he's like this.
you don't even really know what did it, but then again it could've been anything with katsuki. too much eye contact, too long eye contact. your hands lingering a little too long on his face or your fingers rubbing at the crease of his eyebrows.
you don't know what it is but he won't remove his head from your neck now, grumbling about how stupid you are.
"katsukii.."
"shut up." he hisses through gritted teeth like he's angry, and he is. look at what you do to him ! it drives him crazy. you drive him crazy.
yet you giggle, rubbing softly at his hair and he shoves his head into you harder, the angle he's forcing your neck at is awkward but you don't mind, you'll let him have his little tantrum as you stroke his blonde messy tufts of hair tickling your chin.
"all i said was that-"
"i heard you. the first time. shut the fuck up." his grip on your hips tightens to the point you think he'll make indents in your skin. hands practically steaming and boiling hot to show you the embarrassment he refuses to let show on his face. your smirk grows wider, god you love messing with your boyfriend.
"i don't get why you're so angry, baby." you coo sweetly and he growls from the deepest part of his throat. he squeezes at your waist, clearly wanting you to just stop talking. but of course. you don't.
"it's cus youâyou fuckin'â" he splutters and cuts himself off, not finding a proper way to convey how much you make his skin burn and prickle and itch. how you have his heart buzz and beat so loud against his ribcage he's sure you can hear it. and how much he fucking hates it. (he doesn't)
so he does the next best thing.
"ouch !"
he bites you. the asshole.
you're such an asshat !" you whine, pushing at his shoulders, and he grumbles when he pulls away. he lightly nuzzles against the mark he's left into your skin as a sort of apology, you don't deserve a kiss right now. (he'll give you one later) then he pulls away to look at you.
"s'your own fault," he huffs, cheeks less bright then they first were when you'd made the irreparable mistake of complimenting him (in his eyes, you regret nothing) but still with a nasty scowl on his face.
"ya keep sayin' dumb shit so now you deal with the consequences," he presses his nose against your pulse point as he huffs hard into your neck to annoy you and it works because you grumble, you feel him smirk proudly.
two could play that game.
"what dumb shit ? the fact that you're handso-" you cut yourself off with a giggled squeal as katsuki drops you backwards onto his bed with a snarl. you snort and giggle when he blows raspberries and softly bites into your neck, helplessly trying to push him away with your limp arms.
"you just can't help yourself, can ya.." he tuts, grabbing your arms and pushing them against his bed, barely suppressed smirk on his face as he sees your eyes prick with tears, leaning back in to blow into your neck "think youâre funny ? hah ?!"
he ignores your giggled plea's and bites at your fingers when he leans back enough for you to push at his face.
"yuck ! you're gross !" you wheeze, still giggling as you see the lopsided smile on his face. he huffs at the exertion of keeping you still, he really isn't trying hard to convince you he isn't handsome when he looked like that.
"yeah ? i'm gross, huh ? right back at you," he leans in close to you again, smirk still playing on his face "saying mushy shit like that."
"yeah well, i'll keep sayin' it !" you retort, sticking your tongue out at him. he rolls his eyes and drops onto you, causing you to grunt out an 'oof !' sound. he's stays quiet until he presses a soft kiss onto your skin, right where he'd bitten you. unbeknownst to you, his expression softens as he tries to repress a smile. he scoffs.
"you're so damn weird." he utters affectionately.
#needed a lil pic my up after this wretched episode#sigh.#on a more positive note#biter katsuki is back !!#an in full effect baby#..woop woop !#cash is not in the mood rn#my suki#i didnt rlly know how to finish this lol#urghhsn i lub my boyfriend#bakugou katsuki x reader#katsuki bakugou x reader#bakugo fluff#bakugou imagine#bakugou x reader#katsuki x reader#bakugou katsuki#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugou katuski x reader#bakugou fluff#katsuki bakugo fluff#bakugo katsuki x reader#katsuki x you#katsuki x y/n#bakugou x you#bakugou x y/n#bakugou drabble#another drabble we are on a roll#yay (monotone)#bakugo x female reader
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minors and ageless blogs dni
college professor geto (30) making college student gojo (21) sit on his desk and spread his legs wide while jerking himself off so geto can watch his needy ass beg for him
âfaster.â geto orders, gripping himself through his pants. gojoâs mouth waters as he watches his professor stroke the outline of his massive cock. he pants, playing special attention to the head of his cock.
âlike this professor?â he asks, leaning further back and spreading his legs wider as he strokes himself faster, hips thrusting upwards to meet his jerks.
geto hums, âwhy is it youâre such a good obedient boy for me when weâre alone in my office, but during class youâre a disruptive little shit? hm?â
gojo smiles, biting his lip. âi wanted to get your attention, professor. i like the way you look at me when i piss you off.â
geto leans forward while palming himself, pressing his thumb so close to gojoâs hole and spreading him wide. âyou know what iâm thinking about when i look at you like that?â gojo waits expectantly, cock dripping. âhow i would love to see you crying when i stuff my cock down your throat.â
gojo grunts and smiles, eyes rolling back in his head. âwant that.â he says, head falling back. âwanna suck you so good and fuck you after.â
geto raises a brow, hands caressing gojoâs smooth thighs. âyou want to fuck me? what makes you think iâll let you come anywhere near my ass?â
gojo tips his chin down, staring at his professor with lust filled eyes. âever wonder why i wear,â he pauses to grunt on a particularly sensitive stroke, âwhy i wear those grey sweats all the time?â
geto narrows his eyes
gojo smiles and continues, âi see the way you look at the outline of my dick. you canât stop thinking about the dumb jock fucking your hole.â
geto wraps a large hand around gojoâs neck, and his smile grows, as does the speed of his fist. âyou wanna fuck my ass, brat?â
gojo nods. âso bad sir, wanna feel how tight you are around me. wanna-â his hips stutter and jerk as his orgasm creeps up on him. âwanna pump you full of my cum, and i want you to tell me how good i did after. want you to thank me for it.â
âyouâd have to make me cum, first.â geto says, cock straining against his slacks with interest, though he feins disinterest to watch gojo beg for it.
gojo nods, pants growing heavier. âiâd make you feel so good, professor. iâd fuck you so good. e-even let you have my ass after if you want it.â
geto whispers low, âoh i want itâ
âyeah?â gojoâs word is a breathy pant.
âyeah. give it to me, baby.â
âyeah? fuck- fuck, gonna give it to you.â they lock eyes, getting lost in their filthy daydreams as gojo strokes himself to completion. âgonna- g-gonna- fuck! fuck, professor!!â
geto groans with him as gojoâs cock sprays cum all over his uniform and hand, jerking furiously. his cheeks are flushed a beautiful crimson color, and his moans and cries are music to his ears. he couldnât lie.. the load gojo just released wouldâve felt a whole lot better inside him.. maybe it was time to let his eager student ride his ass.
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