#WHAT TBE ACTUAL FUCK
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Visit Tumblr Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
The “We are the 99%” Tumblr blog became the slogan for the Occupy Wall Street movement.
Text
THIS SONG SPEAKS TO ME.
#madds buckley#IM SO. SOSOSOS.#OUCHIE LWIE#CRYING AND SCREAMINH??????????#WHAT TBE ACTUAL FUCK#THIS GENUINELY CHANGED MY BRAIN CHEMISTRY#Spotify
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
all the art i drew during the foul city stream (:
#SCREAMING SCREAMING SCREAMING WHAG TBE FUCK WAS THAT ALBUM ACTUALLYYYYY#YERY MY GLORIOUS KING..........#i will Actually explode#yknow what this is so janissary.#yery killing lowen and killing brother bowelz iits so brija killing bogdan and then the vizier.#and then he fucked off and became a pirate. i fucking guess.#GOOD FUCKING GOD I CANNOT WAIT FOR P4#shaperaverse#art tag#paul shapera#the puppetshade chronicles#the foul city#yery shaperaverse#lowen shaperaverse#i will be drawing That scene later btw this is all js what i drew during the stream itself#during That scene i was. not capable of doing shit#BRO DID HE JUST FUCKING FLOWER. DID YERY FLOWER. WHAT TJE FUCK#also ftr i drew the friendship one before they kissed#waugh. i miss you lowen#DAMN YERY JUST KEEPS FUCKING LOSING PEOPLE#mannnn#shaperaverse fanart
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
You know .
#my mental breakdown this summer was actually completely explainable and while i did/said things i dont stand by#i dont actually think i was the bad guy here. interestingly.#i had to help my mom move and it triggered a huge panic attack bc of past trauma from moving house#and so now my family is saying im going insane#and my friend kept egging me on to ask out his friend#who he and i had developed a really nice friendship but he did kind of like. seem like he was trying to be my personal savior#idk i had a big crush on him bc ofc i fucking did no man has ever treated me that well before#then i jokingly tell him how i feel and he goes all serious#oh and it was four days after the 17th anniversary of my fathers suicide#who i think had bpd/ptsd#so i may be developing the same disorder . and it’s freaking me out#this guy claims he knew i had a crush on him which actually means the way he was talking to me means he was to keep my attention#(he sent a picture of him zoomed in naked hours before this so EXCUSEEE ME FOR ASSUMING)#and i started getting upset with the way i was being talked to and asked him to just say he was talking to me that way for attention#for my own peace of mind. like mind u we were talking every day throughout the day for months#voice calls would last over 5 hours. that kind of thing#i snap at him finally but immediately apologize#he then sends me a screenshot of his ex telling him ‘you have experience in dealing with mentally ill women’#followed by him saying ‘youre right. teehee love you’#so yeah duh i went to the fucking hospital it’s like someone hit me with a hammer in the head three times#then my fucking friend who goaded me into confessing to him tells me when i get out that he feels like im trying to make him choose between#when all i ever did was apologize profusely over and over again#fuck my entire ass man. oh and then two weeks later my best friend abruptly told me she was moving to maine#in two weeks. well no she didnt say that. she said can i stay at yours for a week#and i said um. what? and she said yeah im moving. and then used the fact that she had to get an abortion weeks ago as an excuse for not#telling me. and i said dude what the fuck? and she never talked to me again! so#one two three all gone BAM BAM BAM#oh this was also a week before my birthday#the trauma from moving wasnt actually abt tbe moving it was about how i was treated when we were moving#or basically any stressful family event
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
i am so completely entirely wholly overcome with grief right now i dont even know what the fuck to do
#at the root of it all i just want my parents and pets back#but i will never ever ever get that back#and i do not know how to cope with losing 5 of the closest things to me in the span of two years#i dont know how to recover from that#i know ive made this exact same post fifty times by now#but how the fuck am i supposed to deal with losing my sibling#BOTH MY PARENTS#and my three pets who meant just as much to me#in a two year- 6 fucking months besides my sibling- time span#how the actual fuck am i supposed to deal with that#on top of my only fucking remaining fa#family member often being verbally abusive#and sometimes VERY violently physically#how the fuck am i supposed to deal with that#how the absolute fuck am i supposed to cope#even when i was suicidal when i HAD allt those things#what tbe fuck what the fuck what fhe fixk what the fuck
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
just watched it ends with us girl i am fucking traumatised
#it ends with us#jays bs#bro... what tbe actual fuck#first of all FUCK these ppl for the pr campaign to be abt girlhood and all the bs....#u need ur girls aroundnfor this movie TO HOLD HANDS THRU THE HORRORS#LIKE???? KILL YOURSELF THIS IS A HORRIFYING MOVIE#and these guys cant act normal happy scenes buy i must say blake and justing were great when it came to the sad parts
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
why did i have a dream that i was being stalked and harassed that was genuinely so stressful
#what even prompted that.#also people kept leaving the fucking front door open or unlocked even though they knew this guy kept trying to come into our apartment#i had to keep checking tbe door all the time and once i had to hit him with the door so he wouldnt come in bc it was unlocked and he had hi#hand on the door handle trying to open it before i was able to lock#stressful as fuck.#i was intending to tell someone downstairs like a landlord or door man i guess? i dont know.#i kept meaning to tell them to not let him enter the building anymore but i kept forgetting. ok#adhd prevails#also not my actual apartment the hallway was indoors and my mom hates those
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
just finished the memory of souls
#a chorus of dragons#the memory of souls#WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK#no one talk to me for three business days OH MY DUCKKNG GOD#HOW#HOW IS THIS ONLY BOOK 3#WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERES 2 MORE#don’t get me wrong that was phenomenal I was absolutely captivated every moment#and I like. understand the ending#but also WHAT TBE ACTUAL FUCK KIHRIN#thank FUCK I already have the next book on hand#I don’t have book 5 on hand though…I’ll have to do something about that#because WHAT THE FUCK#mutuals who follow me for keeper I don’t think I’ll be able to shut up about this#all caps
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
Something about my little animal noises. My little squeaks and grunts when I'm being affectionate with my partner. The little gentle snort/sniffs i do when I'm trying to adjust into my environment or figure something out. The little whine i do when i yawn. All the indescribable specific animal noises that don't tell me which creature is out, but they are DEFINITELY noisy and active and give me something to say.
#i dont have words idkim stimming and shuffling in the dark like a freak and i started noticing how many i make idly#im all fucked up rn i cant sleep and nauseous as fUck and im all.thinkin about past life stuff (not /neg rn but idk its not tbe best)#so im all whiny and grunting and ill go lay down with my partner in just a moment longer.i am restless#I'm gonna smoke sooo much weed first#system babbles#alastor#nonhuman#alterhuman#animalistic tendencies#animal noises#idk what to tag#therian#fictive#actually plural
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
the mha leaks. if anyone wants to find me ill be six feet under
#what tbe fuck#planned to say smth actually relevant abt thwm but i cant i just feel crazy#what rbe hell
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
hi guys. im sick so i'll be answering any rat egg questions y'all have
#not a confession#freakblr#🐀🥚#tbe rats here have such fucking short lifespans#maurice lived the lonhest i think but they disappeared#qnd then emile. the one who laid eghs in the libing room and wjat started this whole rat eggs thing#i think emile actually genuinely got mad at us#bc they ended up in a rqt trap#and it somehow managed to escape#but their fur was all ripped out from its body and dhit#and so whenever my family saw it#they knew that emile was like mad asf at us#my dad said it had some look of anger idk#BUT. update: my mom said she saw like. a new rat and shit#wondeirng ehat we should name itm#acthallt guys send me name suggestions#tmf#the music freaks#this js the WORST explanation i gave ever gjven#and what makes it worse is that these rats hage actually fucked with my head i swear#anyways i think emile disappeared thats wjyvmy mom thinks she saw like some new rat
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
my blood is boiling. i hope whoever stole my fucking spotify account this morning explodes in a multicar collision that miraculously everyone else involved walks away with minimal injury from. i hope you perish. i hope your mother knows and is ashamed of you i hope you rot and burn i hope you have no friends. fuck you. years of music saved on that fucking account.
#1% milk#im actually si mad about this#i was opening spotify because i was about to take a shower but it said i needed to log in and i tried but i was like hm. lets just check my#email just in case! and sure enough “someone signed into your account at 5:23 in the morning from tbe UK!” “someone changed your email at#5:44 in the morning!“ LIKE. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO FUCJING DO AND ITS SET TO A FAKE SPOTIFY SUPPORT EMAIL BECAUSE ITS CLEARLY FOR A SCAM#i just canceled my premium thru google playstore and emailed actual support with the email.#idek what my username is bc it was some fucking number and letter jumble that i could never change!#**i emailed support a screenshot of the “your email was changed” showing the fake support email :)
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
boo hoo sad pity party posting hours LMAO but I rlly truly don't think I will ever be in another relationship again. I don't feel that I will every b desirable or deserving enough, and I don't feel like I will ever even b seen as a guy n idk. I just don't know.
#mayave its imposter syndrome maybe its internalized transphobia but i dont think any gay man would ever date me bc i dont thibk any of them#would thibk of me as a man. idk. maybe this will change once i start like. PHYICALLY transitioning but i rlly feel like theres no hope 4 me#i feel like i will always be thought of as a woman for the rest of my life i feel like i will never pass as anything but a woman i feel like#i dont have any positive qualities i don't like a single thing abt myself i dont thibk im capable of loving someone im so distant w everyone#im so scared of phyically and emotional intimacy i feel like a burden i dont even know how to act like a man and i KNOW that thst isnt a#fucking thing i KNOW theres no right way of being a man i know that logically but still the fact that i grew up isolated from men and#that i rarely interact w them even to this day i have no male friends no male role models nothing im so scared im gonna like.#break social rules n shit which is RIDICULOUS bc once again there's no right way to b a guy or to preform masculinity and also im so early#in my transition no one even knows im a guy anways. but also im worri3d bc of thst no one will ever seen me as one unless i start conforming#to traditional masculinity and i dont know now to emulate it bc ivenonly ever seen it from afar i dont actually know what guys talk about#howbthey act around eachother what is socially acceptable or not i dont have a clue bc i dont ever interact w men and its like. fucking#stupid of me to even want to know bc it shouldn't matter to me BUT IT DOES and it makes me so anxious that i do not know how to emulate it#even if i wanted to i wouldnt know how bc i grew up in a fucking cult and i know so little men and i have terrible social skills n i#probably have autism which just. everything is compounded upon eachother n i feel like im going crazy i dont think ill ever be enough.#I hope i'm in a better mental place when i start t but even that im so fucking bad at doing things bc i have executive dysfunction that like#i havent even started tbe process or called thr clinic im just likem fucking spiraling. I hope my mindset becomes healthier once I start.#anwyss lol. do u guys like me? bc i feel like im unbearable n im trying not to be let me know if u do or not so i can try to cahnge ^.^#🪽
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
#fretting over my future once more. i’m afraid i might actually kms if i go back to a regular school but i’m worried i’ll completely#fuck up my chances of getting into a university if i don't#turning to that cursed website Quora . i can’t do this i’m just TERRIFIED i’ll fuck up and only realize it a year down the line#i don’t want to think about what hasn’t even happened yet but i can’t just blissfully ignore the possible consequences either#i hate that this happened to me. i already had a Plan. a straightforward idea of what i was going to do and then i get ARRESTED omggg#why is it me that has to have my life disrupted like this‚ right? i hope hope hope things will turn out okay in the end but i am just sad#about everything that’s ever happened to me#i want to do the private candidate thing so badly but it means not finishing the last 2 yrs of highschool#i’d still technically be learning tbe same things but its more about the certificate or whatever that comes with it#and the friends‚ too ....#of course you only do this to me when i am almost at the finish line and ive found people i click with! thank you 👍🏻 salamat sa lahat 🤗#i need to do more research on the topic before freaking out . but i'm just. eugh so so sososososo sad#💭#negative#cw vent#edit: it is becoming more and more likely that finishing my edu in a regular school would be the best option but AHHH#i really. i really cant emphasize how much i dont want that for myself. i hate it#i miss my home so terribly. but whatever i guess!#also i relapsed so thats kind of a bummer ...#cw self harm
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
cane put to my roommate and she was super normal about it and this is the first time iev ever lived with someone im out to and im hougnyo fuckmg cry fukc /pos /really really pos
#its so echausting beign a bundle fo frayed nerves constantly expecting to be ejected out of my own home tbe second i make a wrong move#but it doesnt matter ! !#it doesnt natter it FINE what the fuck oh hell#amber actually saying stuff
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
I sincerely think watanuki would wear a wedding dress btw. here comes the non binary bride
#but western or eastern or fusion is so fun to consider...#it WOULD be willowy rather than fluffy but thats something we know because thats his preferred silhouette in canon lol#he needs to get into the wedding egg outfit at least once but im like absolutely picturing smth super fitted and classyyyy#which is funny cause you KNOW his ass would be desperate to fucking run around like a headless chicken#he would be like FUCK the eyeliner i need to make every single meal and set every single table or ill kill myself#thoroughly of the correct belief that a dough water wedding would start with 'let him have everything he wants'#and end with 'PLEASE GOD WE ARE ON RED ALERT PLEASE KEEP HIM LOCKED IN THE DRESSING ROOM OR HE WILL GO INSANE'#people have to take turns guarding the door#it would probably mostly b meki tho#ceo of the plentiful stop fucking trying to do everything yourself if it stresses you out more than you have fun dumbass committee#doumeki would take ten minutes to get ready and out serve the entire room. somehow#actually i feel like at least 2 people would crash the wedding by accident thinking its a movie set or a modelling agency party#imagine youre like omg r celebrities here i need to get their autographs and you come face to face with the bride#who is fucking exploding and screaming WHERE IS THE LAMB SAUCE#i think even if you dont hc watanuki as non binary being a bride is his destiny#he accepted it already#hes the other wife hes the long suffering domestic goddess hes the beautiful woman best viewed at night in a dress under an umbrella#ok you know what lets not beat around the bush you know its going to be a silk cheongsam collar maxi dress#imagine hima opens a magazine weeks later only to see the wedding was covered like an influencer wedding because of tbe misunderstanding#'oomf youre in a magazine!!!' 'im fucking what'
0 notes
Text
.
#i dont . think abt my .iscarriage often bht lately its been#heavily on my fuckinf Skull like .#espxw what happened the other night (i cant get into this but ??? p sure i met my future kid??? the Other One???)#like i Know my daughter . she basically is running my life in an odd way . but . i think i met my other child the other night it was weird#anyway . woke uo w the insane urge to . get a reading from this one lafy who even her collectivr shit#is spot on it drives me wild ..but anyway. hate when she says smth and it like . has me needing to take a Breather bc Oh#like . idk abt u but i started thinking abt how this wouldve looked to him and i just huh .#i kept it hidden for Over a Ywar n then vlurted it out piss drunk with his friend around. and then not a conversation was had abt it Ever#bc we broke up 2eks later or smth like . am i insane for assuming that woukdnt ???? effecf him in some way ?????#bc it would me . n idk the only way i can see this not being a 2nd thought is if he rlly didnt give a shit abt me at all#and genuinwly sisnt actually mean anythinf he said to me . but i donr think thats the case#like as mych as i want to fuckjg. sit here and pretend he didnt love me#i think he did. he was just a fuckhead w bullshit. and im kinda .#idk i dont know how to deel abt him anymore and it mostly just makes me.fucking SAAAAAAAAAD.#anyway all of this does make me frel slightly crazy . but .#i know smth abt thisnis right . n i k ow tbe girl i see in my dreams and can feel Watxhibg me is my daughter .#everytime i connect to her o do genuinely get teary eyed like . shes so fucking sweet. shes a beautiful soul oh my god .#i genuibely cant wait to meet her 🥺 shes so cool :') passionate and fiery i fucking adore her .#anyway whack. all of this is whack i haye being spiritual sometimes its wild how this shit . anyway
0 notes