#Villa Louise

[orphancookie69]

10/2024: Wisconsin Family Trip!

It is funny how life happens. In one month I pass up like 4 trips and in the months after when things "calm" down I go on back to back trips in the same week! I am not sure what killed me more but I am mostly alive still! No regrets though, family reunions are great!

Monday:

We flew from SNA to PHX in the early afternoon. There was a small layover in Phoenix. The first flight was 1 hour and then the next flight was 3 hours. We flew from PHX to MSN. Both flights went great. We rented a car, a KIA SUV, and man Kia came to play-it was a solid car. It was a 2 hour drive from Madison to Bloomington. There was also a 2 hour time difference, so it was uber late when we got in. One of our family members met us in town and guided us in, which was really nice. We stayed up way too late talking but it has been a minute since I have had such a warm welcome-especially since I have not met many of these people before. (If I did meet them, its been many years and I was very young).

Tuesday:

Waking up the next day, with California being 2 hours behind Wisconsin, was fun. Family members came by that lived down the road or in the next city over. We were told that there was a bakery down in town that was good, so we walked to get some donuts. It was funny, as my family has a reputation so when we walked in-between association or small town news-people looked at us funny. It was really dark when we came in so we took a drive to see the state in daylight. Driving to St Feriole Island was so pretty. Man that is God's Country. We saw the Wisconsin River and the Mississippi River. Villa Louise is nearby so we made plans to tour that later and go to Shihata's Orchard after. Beautiful lot, great products-I can't wait for them to have an online store. We tried Apple Salsa and Jalapeno Berry Jelly. SO GOOD. We toured Villa Louise and I loved it. The house and furniture dated back to 1839. We headed back to the family house. By the time we were back, dinner was done and kids were home from school. The energy a house has when its full of people is amazing. We played some Farkle. We got a family photo, and man that was pretty cool.

Wednesday:

Everyone woke up and we had breakfast. I had a request from back home for Wisconsin Cheese, and really I don't blame them. So we went to Carr Valley Cheese in Fennimore. We hit a thrift store and a coffee shop on the way back. We came back and had dinner with everyone and did more Farkle. We had an early bed time and packed as much as we could the night before.

Thursday:

We got up really early. 2 hour drive from Bloomington to Madison. We dropped off the rental car and went through security. General rule of thumb is to get to an airport 2 hours before the flight leaves. Before we board, they make an announcement that there are some technical issues they are working on. They "fix" them and we board. The flight time gets delayed twice and then we deboard so they can fix the issue. We reboard and then take off AN HOUR LATE. So the original flight we planned to catch got changed around. When we landed we went back to California/Arizona time. Short layover. Then we flew to SNA. It took an hour to get back to my house from the airport, and another hour to get my grandmother home. Funny to think how little ground you cover in 2 hours in california vs wisconsin.

My mom works for American Airlines with her Fiance and set this up to see her mom's side of the family for her mom. We were her first flight trip she set up since she started working there. The weather was supposed to be colder but it was surprisingly warm for this time of year. Most things start to shut down for the season as winter starts to come. I generally enjoyed this trip, some trips feel more like work than relaxing for me. But family is everything and I look forward to seeing them again. Would you go to a family reunion?

[theunapolegeticshipper]

Because I’m in the mood to cause some mildly amusing, no harm done style chaos, I’m doing a follow up to my “They Deserved Better Poll” for some of my fave ships , but specifically for the shows that were cancelled or left on cliffhangers

https://www.tumblr.com/theunapolegeticshipper/752722521267273728/the-they-deserved-better-poll?source=share

[chic-a-gigot]

La Mode illustrée, no. 29, 21 juillet 1912, Paris. Les nouvelles fleurs en tissu. Louise Villas. No. 1. — Rose en ruban. (Contour de la fleur: 40 centimètres.) No. 2. — Rose en taffetas. (Contour: 13 centimètres.) No. 3. — Rose pompon. (Contour: 6 centimètres.) No. 4. — Pavot. (Contour: 27 centimètres.) Ville de Paris / Bibliothèque Forney

No. 1. — Rose en ruban.

Exécution. — Tailler une rondelle de mousseline à patron de 6 centimètres de diamètre. Se procurer du ruban de faille très souple de deux jolis tons de rose. Le plus foncé réservé pour le cœur de la fleur. Il faut 1 mètre 30 de chaque teinte sur une largeur de 6 centimètres. Froncer ensuite le bas du ruban en réduisant la longueur à 40 centimètres au plus.

Pour simuler les pétaies il suffit de "pincer" le ruban de distance en distance en fixant les plis par un point. Les premiers pétales sont formés à 10 centimètres de distance (prise à la lisière du ruban), puis on augmente progressivement jusqu'à 18 centimètres pour les plus grands pétales.

Ceci fait, on commence par coudre au centre de la rondelle l'extrémité froncée du ruban foncé, puis l'on tourne en colimaçon en cousant le ruban. La jonction des deux teintes est invisible, puisqu'elle s'opère sous un pétale. Une fois la fleur terminée on repousse intérieurement la rondelle de mousseline, afin de produire une cavité qui donne du relief à la fleur. Ajouter une tige avec feuillage artificiel.

—

Cut a round of patterned muslin 6 centimeters in diameter. Get some very flexible faille ribbon in two pretty shades of pink. The darkest reserved for the heart of the flower. It takes 1.3 meters of each shade over a width of 6 centimeters. Then gather the bottom of the ribbon, reducing the length to 40 centimeters at most.

To simulate the petals it is enough to "pinch" the ribbon from distance to distance by fixing the folds with a point. The first petals are formed 10 centimeters apart (taken from the edge of the ribbon), then gradually increase to 18 centimeters for the largest petals.

This done, we start by sewing the gathered end of the dark ribbon in the center of the washer, then we turn in a spiral by sewing the ribbon. The junction of the two shades is invisible, since it takes place under a petal. Once the flower is finished, the muslin disc is pushed back inside, in order to produce a cavity which gives relief to the flower. Add a stem with artificial foliage.

No. 2. — Rose en taffetas.

Ce genre de fleur est destiné aux garnitures de robes, employées en bouquets pour retenir les plis d'une draperie, ou rangées sur le devant des corsages en guise de boucle de ceinture.

Chaque rose se compose d'un cœur et de cinq pétales. Le cœur se fait avec un biais de tissu replié. Il a une longueur de 12 centimètres sur une largeur de 5, centimètres, ce qui donne 2 centimètres 1/2 une fois replié.

Commencer à fixer le fil à l'extrémité d'un des bords supérieurs mis en double, descendre en biais en comptant les points jusqu'au bord inférieur, remonter en formant le même nombre de points et continuer ces zigzags sur toute la longueur du biais. Tirer fortement le fil. Rouler cette petite ruche qui formera des pointes chiffonnées, la lier par le pied, et couper le surplus du tissu. Ses pétales sont des carrés de toile de soie ayant 10 centimètres de largeur pour les deux premiers, 12 centimètres pour les trois autres, cinq pétales étant nécessaires pour faire ces roses. Après les avoir taillés, on les ploie en "mouchoir" et l'on passe un fil allant d'un angle à un autre, en prononçant plus ou moins la courbe du côté de la pointe du milieu suivant le relief que l'on désire obtenir. La pointe qui reste au milieu doit être ensuite supprimée.

Tirer sur le fil sans trop serrer et arrêter solidement. Procéder de cette façon pour chaque pétale. Les monter ensuite autour du cœur en commençant par les plus petits.

Les feuilles s'obtiennent aussi avec avec un carré de tissu. On les reploie également en mouchoir. Mais ici on coupe l'étoffe de façon à former deux triangles, ce qui fait deux feuilles par carré.

Reployer ensuite le triangle. Faire une couture partant du sommet jusqu'au bas. Retourner ce cornet. Le côté pointu simule le haut de la feuille. Le bas froncé très serré forme des plis imitant les nervures. Chaque feuille se fixe ensuite sous la rose qui doit rester assez plate.

—

Each rose consists of a heart and five petals. The heart is made with a folded fabric bias. It is 12 centimeters long by 5 centimeters wide, which gives 2.5 centimeters when folded.

Begin to fasten the thread at the end of one of the upper edges doubled, go down on the bias by counting the stitches to the lower edge, go up by forming the same number of stitches and continue these zigzags over the entire length of the bias. Pull the thread strongly. Roll up this little ruffle which will form crumpled points, tie it by the foot, and cut off the excess fabric. Its petals are squares of silk canvas, 10 centimeters wide for the first two, 12 centimeters for the other three, five petals being necessary to make these roses. After having cut them, we fold them in a "handkerchief" and we pass a wire going from one angle to another, by pronouncing more or less the curve on the side of the point of the medium according to the relief which we desire. The tip that remains in the middle must then be removed.

Pull the thread without tightening too much and stop firmly. Proceed in this way for each petal. Then mount them around the heart, starting with the smallest ones.

The leaves are also obtained with a square of fabric. They are also folded into a handkerchief. But here we cut the fabric so as to form two triangles, which makes two sheets per square.

Then fold the triangle back. Sew a seam from top to bottom. Return this cone. The pointed side simulates the top of the leaf. The very tight gathered bottom forms pleats imitating the ribs. Each leaf then attaches under the rose which must remain fairly flat.

No. 3. — Roses pompon.

Destinées soit à un chapeau, soit comme bouquet de corsage.

Ces roses se font en toile de soie de deux tons avec feuillage artificiel. On procède pour les faire comme pour les précédentes, avec cette différence que les dimensions en sont très réduites. Le cœur est taillé sur une longueur de 12 centimètres sur 3 centimètres de largeur. Les zigzags sont beaucoup plus petits et on adapte ce cœur à une tige de laiton qui sert de monture à la fleur. Les pétales, au nombre de six, se cousent un à un. Les premiers carrés ont 4 centimètres 1/2 de largeur, les autres 5 centimètres 1/2. Procéder comme pour le précédent modèle, en enveloppant bien le cœur de façon à ce que la fleur ne soit pas trop épanouie. Enfiler les fils de laiton dans des tubes de caoutchouc et terminer par quelques feuillages.

—

Intended either for a hat or as a corsage.

These roses are made of two-tone silk canvas with artificial foliage. We proceed to make them as for the previous ones, with this difference that the dimensions are very small. The heart is cut over a length of 12 centimeters by 3 centimeters wide. The zigzags are much smaller and this heart is adapted to a brass rod which serves as a mount for the flower. The petals, six in number, are sewn together one by one. The first squares are 4.5 centimeters wide, the others 5.5 centimeters. Proceed as for the previous model, wrapping the heart well so that the flower does not bloom too much. Thread the brass wires into rubber tubes and finish with some foliage.

No. 4. — Pavot.

Pour faire cette jolie fleur on emploie du ruban à picots qui existe en de charmants coloris souvent ombrés, ce qui permet dans la largeur de trouver deux fleurs d'un ton différent. Il faut environ 75 centimètres de ruban sur une largeur de 12 centimètres pour faire deux fleurs, soit 6 centimètres de largeur pour chaque fleur.

Diviser en cinq parties ces 75 centimètres. Les séparer. Froncer le bas de chaque bande en partant du picot et en décrivant une courbe comme pour les roses. Abattre ensuite les pointes qui restent de chaque côté. Serrer fortement le fil et arrèter.

L'armature du cœur consiste en un bouton quelconque de 1 centimètre de diamètre ou d'une simple rondelle de carton rembourrée d'ouate, que l'on adapte à un fil de laiton. Recouvrir ensuite cette armature avec une sphère de toile de soie vert pâle en la fronçant autour de la tige.

Passer des fils noirs en les entrecroisant sur toute la surface du cœur. Adapter autour une petite ruchette ayant 1/2 centimètre de hauteur et faite comme il à été dit pour les cœurs des roses. Presser fortement les plis afin d'imiter les pistils et coudre autour du cœur. Employer du taffetas ou de la toile de soie noire, gros bleu, violet ou un ton changeant très foncé. Une fois le coin terminé, placer les pétales autour en les chevauchant l'un sur l'autre. Terminer par une branche de feuillage.

On peut tout aussi bien employer du ruban sans picots; et ces fluers, exécutées en rouge, imitent à s'y méprendre les coquelicots des champs.

—

To make this pretty flower we use spiked ribbon which exists in charming colors often shaded, which allows in the width to find two flowers of a different tone. It takes about 75 centimeters of ribbon over a width of 12 centimeters to make two flowers, or 6 centimeters in width for each flower.

Divide these 75 centimeters into five parts. Separate them. Gather the bottom of each strip starting from the picot and describing a curve as for the roses. Then cut down the remaining tips on each side. Tighten the thread strongly and stop.

The frame of the heart consists of any button 1 centimeter in diameter or a simple round piece of cardboard stuffed with wadding, which is fitted to a brass wire. Then cover this frame with a sphere of pale green silk fabric by gathering it around the stem.

Pass black threads criss-crossing them over the entire surface of the heart. Adapt around a small hive 1/2 centimeter high and made as it was said for the hearts of the roses. Firmly press the folds to imitate the pistils and sew around the heart. Use taffeta or silk black, deep blue, purple or a very dark changing tone. Once the corner is finished, place the petals around it, overlapping them one on top of the other. Finish with a branch of foliage.

You can just as well use ribbon without pins; and these flowers, executed in red, imitate field poppies unmistakably.

Louise Villas

[postcard-from-the-past]

Louise Villa and Breiner Hotel in Abbazia, modern-day Opatija, Croatia

Austrian vintage postcard

[mcgnussen]

kevin is leaving behind life in copenhagen and has bought a house on the same street as his in-laws and close to his dad and siblings near his hometown ✌️

[farkledagain]

Sketch page! I actually labeled everyone. I do like both of the Nor/Taran sketches and might clean them up one day. Good faces and body language.

[slapiz]

Moisés Finalé: La belleza radical

Moisés Finalé ... “un arte con dimensiones antropológicas y vocación intercultural donde los colores y los contrastes dan toda su autenticidad a los misterios que esconden” YT

Otredades, nueva expo del artista cubano Mosés Finalé, podrá ser visitada en la Galería Villa Manuela (interior de la UNEAC ) del 20 de abril al 20 de junio. Yamilé Tabio En ese ir y venir cruzando el océano, Moisés ha encontrado un estilo que lo identifica, una marca, un código lo suficientemente inclusivo como para permitirse la asunción constante de nuevas técnicas y estrategias…

[frenchcurious]

Villa à Hellerup, Danemark Conçue en 1931 par Frits Schlegel (1885-1965). Photographie Marie-Louise Høstbo. - source Art Deco 1920.

[mesetacadre]

When the Red Army entered Korea in early August, 1945, heavy battles took place in the north, but the Japanese rule remained tranquil in the south, for the Russians stopped by the Yalta agreement at the 38th parallel, while the Americans came several weeks after the surrender of Japan, and ruled at first through the Japanese and then through the Japanese-appointed Korean officials and police. So naturally all of the pro-Japanese Koreans – former police and officials, landlords and stockholders in Japanese companies – fled south to the American zone. The flight of all these right-wing elements amazingly simplified North Korean politics. The Russians did not have to set up any left-wing government, assuming that they wanted one. They merely set free some ten thousand political prisoners and said, by implication; “Go home, boys, you’re free to organize.” Under Japanese rule all natural political leaders either served Japan or went to jail. With the pro-Japanese gone, the ex-jailbirds became the vindicated heroes of their home towns. They were all radicals of sorts, including many Communists. Anyone who knows what a tremendous reception was given to Tom Mooney when he was released to come home to the workers of San Francisco, may imagine the effect on the small towns and villages when ten thousand of these political martyrs came home. North Korea just naturally took a great swing leftwards, and the Russians had only to recognize “the choice of the Korean people.” People’s Committees sprang up in villages, counties, and provinces and coalesced into a provisional government under the almost legendary guerrilla leader Kim Il Sung. Farmers organized, demanded the land from the landlords and got it in twenty-one days by a government decree. (Compared to the land reforms of other countries, this sounds like a tale of Aladdin’s lamp!) Ninety per cent of all big industry – it had belonged to Japanese concerns – was handed over by the Russians “to the Korean people” and nationalized by one more decree. Trade unions organized, demanded a modern labor code, and got it without any trouble from their new government, with the eight-hour day, abolition of child labor, and social insurance all complete. Another decree made women equal with men in all spheres of activity and another expanded schools. Then general elections were held and a “democratic front” of three parties swept unopposed to power. The natural opposition had all gone south, to be sheltered – and put in power – by the Americans. This is the, reason, I think, for the almost exaggerated sense of “people’s power” that the North Koreans express. Their real class struggle is coming; it hasn’t fully hit them yet. The reactionaries all fled south, where they are bloodily suppressing strikes. In North Korea the farmers are building new houses and buying radios because they no longer pay land rent, while the workers are taking vacations in former Japanese villas. The North Koreans assume that this is just what naturally happens when once you are a “liberated land.” “They aren’t yet liberated down south,” they told me. “The Americans let those pro-Japanese traitors stay in power.”

In North Korea: First Eye-Witness Reports, Anna Louise Strong, 1949

[coochiequeens]

Finally I'm able share some good news

Wild festivals, exquisite fruit-bowls and unusually realistic renderings of motherhood and female friendship – not to mention a glimpse of Lady Hamilton as an enthusiastic follower of Bacchus – will go on show in Madrid on Tuesday as one of the country’s most famous galleries seeks to spike the patriarchal canon of art history with a new, and avowedly feminist, exhibition.

The show at the Thyssen-Bornemisza – called simply Maestras (Women Masters) – uses almost 100 paintings, lithographs and sculptures to show how female artists from the late 16th to the early 20th centuries won recognition in their own lifetimes, only to find their works forgotten, erased or consigned to dusty storerooms.

Organised into eight chronological sections that reflect artistic and social changes, Maestras also explores how female artists, gallerists and patrons worked together to create and celebrate art while living and working in the grip and gaze of sexist, and often misogynistic, societies.

Elizabeth Sparhawk-Jones, The Shoe Shop, 1911. Photograph: Elyse Allen/© Art Resource, New York Scala, Florence

Seventeenth-century works by Artemisia Gentileschi, Fede Galizia and Elisabetta Sirani give way to still lifes of fruit and flowers before the exhibition moves to portraits – including Élisabeth Louise Vigeé Le Brun’s Lady Hamilton as a Bacchante – and then to Orientalism, depictions of working women, images of maternity, sisterhood and, finally, to images of female emancipation.

Among the show’s early exhibits is one of Gentileschi’s anguished studies of Susanna and the Elders, while the later pieces include Mary Cassatt’s bleary-eyed Breakfast in Bed and Maruja Mallo’s playful Fair pictures.

“This exhibition speaks positively of that other half of art history,” said the exhibition’s curator, the art historian and critic Rocío de la Villa.

“For a long time, the feminist history of art has been beset by all the handicaps and obstacles that had been put in the path of female creators. For example, they couldn’t access the same artistic training that their male colleagues could. They generally lived in an extremely patriarchal system that denied them their rights and in which their signatures had no legal value.”

There were, however, “certain moments and certain places” in which conditions were more favourable to female artists, and the show aims to offer “a series of windows through which we can see a mutual understanding and a camaraderie between artists, gallery owners and patrons”.

It also reminds visitors that some talented women caught the eye of European royal courts, and that some had husbands who helped them in the studio – or even looked after their children – because they knew that their wives’ gifts far exceeded their own.

Mary Cassatt, Breakfast in Bed, 1897. Photograph: The Huntington Library, Art Museum

Guillermo Solana, the artistic director of the Thyssen-Bornemisza, said Maestras was another example of the museum’s continuing commitment to feminism, education and addressing the prejudices of the past.

“I’d promised myself that I wouldn’t do any mansplaining today but I can’t help it when it comes to explaining what I’ve learned from the process of doing this exhibition, because I’ve learned a lot,” he told journalists on Monday morning.

“The first thing I learned from this exhibition – and which I think the public will also learn – was so many new names; so many fantastic artists I’d had no idea about and had never heard of. Of course, we knew about Artemisia Gentileschi and Frida Kahlo or Paula Modersohn-Becker, but how many important artists have got away – or been taken from us?”

Frida Kahlo, Portrait of Lucha María, A Girl from Tehuacán, 1942. Photograph: akg-images/© Rafael Doniz @ 2023 Banco de México Diego Rivera Frida Kahlo Museums Trust, México, D.F./VEGAP

De la Villa agreed. “The public is going to ask, ‘How can it be that we didn’t know about these female artists?’” she said.

“How is it that their works were in storerooms until recently? Maestras is a feminist exhibition that seeks to emphatically correct the prejudices that have come about as a result of the patriarchy – prejudices that have meant that works by female artists have remained in museum storerooms during the 20th century.”

She said the male-dominated artistic system had always sought to defend itself by denigrating female artists. Equally damaging, she added, was how historians had played down the achievements of women until their voices were silenced and their creations overlooked and then hidden from view.

“When women are hidden, or robbed of their past, they are robbed of their identity,” said De la Villa. “The power of culture is very important. It just can’t be separated from the social conditions we enjoy, or which we suffer.”

 Maestras is at the Thyssen-Bornemisza museum from 31 October to 4 February 2024

[perhaps-in-anotherdream]

[CN] Li Zeyan’s Metropolis Date (Eng Translation)

⌚Warning⌚ This post contains detailed spoilers for a date, 都会之约, that is yet to be released on the global server! ♡

[Translation under the cut]

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

【Subbed Video】

──────────

【Important Notes】 

some of you might already know this, especially those of you who follow my translations, but still gonna explain since it’s the pivotal point of this date 🤭

The term “哥哥” (gēge) literally translates to “elder brother”, you might be more familiar with the Korean or Japanese alternatives of this term (oppa/ onii-chan). if not used to address your own elder brother, you wouldn’t dare to use it with just anyone – so, when a Chinese girl addresses a boy as her “gege”, she’d use it to address sb she has a very close/ intimate relationship with, address her boyfriend, or take the leap and address a guy she has a crush on to be cutesy LOL. which is why the use of “gege” in this date is so multifaceted — the term which was initially used as a courtesy becomes a “barrier” in fear of being “friend-zoned”, but makes come back in the parts when used by MC’s friends to tease her or when MC hesitates to address him as “gege” in private b/c of the crush connotation haha.

✦ the use of “gege” with the connotation of boyfriend/ crush prevails in the canon verse too, MC used to address Li Zeyan by this term when they were little and after the first comeback, we’ve had MC use this term many times in the past years: ♡

setting and timeline:

the present day story takes place in New York, around 1925/27, and before the great depression (1929).

──────────────────────────────────────────────────

【Chapter 1】 

Hubbubs of laughter intermittently resonate from the stretch convertible as it glides through the night, weaving through the distant and nearby lights before coming to a halt in the front courtyard of the mansion.

Myself and a few female friends of mine, slightly tipsy and carrying a faint scent of alcohol, support the ornate headpieces wobbling on our heads as we step down from the car, laughing and playfully nudging one another.

Female Friend: Can you believe Jennifer actually invited that actor! Seriously, when our eyes met, I was practically drowning in those eyes; I didn’t even hear a word he said…

Thinking back to that man whose words were dripped with flattery, I lazily let out a yawn.

MC: Enough, Louise. Perhaps your brain is just filtering out those unpleasant bits of news, you know?

MC: He should thank his lucky stars for starring in a silent movie; otherwise, no one would buy into his performance.

MC: If it weren’t for Jennifer, the editor-in-chief, insisting, I wouldn’t even want to mention his name in the article chronicling tonight’s nightlife… it’s just a waste of space for another line.

Amidst the laughter of the girls, I suddenly seem to feel a certain gaze on me. I stop talking and turn my eyes in the direction of home. Sure enough, I spot a familiar figure.

With one hand resting on the marble railing of the terrace, Li Zeyan looks in my direction, his eyes lowered. The light outlines his physique, carving out a slender silhouette.

Through the thick darkness of the night, those somber eyes lock with mine for a moment. Then, he turns and walks into the villa.

Female Friend: Would you look at that, your old-fashioned gege is still awake at this hour… Could he be waiting for you?

I receive a teasing elbow nudge from my friend, but I offer no retort.

“Old-fashioned.” That term does seem to match him quite well.

In this era where there is never any shortage of merrymaking, he rarely makes appearances at gatherings like banquets and social clubs.

Tonight, before heading out, I asked him if he would like to accompany me, and unsurprisingly, I was met with a rejection.

—

───── [FLASHBACK STARTS] ─────

LZY: No, I have no intention of attending.

LZY: It’s not that I have any other rendezvous to make an appearance at, but I do have more pressing matters to take care of.

LZY: You go ahead, but don’t stay out too late.

───── [FLASHBACK ENDS] ─────

—

Perhaps he does have something else he’s really eager to pursue, or perhaps he simply wants to steer clear of certain people… who knows?

Reflecting on the unexplained decrease in our interactions since becoming adults, a hint of melancholy suddenly settles into my heart. I press my lips together, incline my head, and speak nonchalantly as if unaffected.

MC: [blushing]  It isn’t something worth caring about, is it? Anyway, he’s not my “real gege”...

──────────

Creak—

The sound of the gate slowly being pushed open rings out in my ears. I turn my head and see Li Zeyan behind the door, quietly arching an eyebrow. Undoubtedly, he has heard what I just said.

A flicker of guilt passes through me. Aware of my companions’ fixed gazes behind me, I walk into the house with my chest held high, close the door behind me, and walk past Li Zeyan.

LZY: Had a good time?

MC: Oh, it was pretty good… the atmosphere at the whole banquet was quite lively.

MC: Jennifer also showed us the new gemstone she recently bought. It was so… sparkling!

I nonchalantly remove my gloves and fling them onto the sofa, envy in my eyes as I raise my hands to gesture an approximate size in front of Li Zeyan. A light chuckle reaches my ears.

LZY: If you fancy it, you can expect to receive an even finer one in the future.

MC: [blushing] I wish, but the qualities of the gemstones in New York in recent times have been really unappealing.

Li Zeyan’s eyes travel over my absent-mindedly pursed lips, but he doesn’t comment on anything. Instead, he simply taps his fingertips on the staircase railing rhythmically.

The air lapses into silence again, with only the swaying shadows of the trees playing on the floor of the hall. I stifle a yawn and walk past him as if nothing has happened.

MC: Alright, I’m going to go and hit the hay in my room. Tomorrow, there’s still…

LZY: MC.

Suddenly, a low whisper reaches my ears from behind. My hand gripping the railing pauses, and I stand on the stairs, turning to look back at Li Zeyan.

His intense gaze bores deep into me, and the emotions in his deep-set eyes appear more complex and difficult to discern than at any time in the past. After a moment, he finally speaks.

LZY: There’s something I believe I need to tell you.

LZY: Next week, I’ll be moving away from home.

MC: …

My lips part, and my heart suddenly pauses for one beat. My eyes wander over his face, trying to find any hint of jest in his words.

Did he say this in a fit of pique because of what I said earlier? But he’s clearly not the kind of person to behave like this…

While I stare at him with bewilderment and helplessness, Li Zeyan offers me no additional explanation. His brooding eyes trace over the intentionally rolled-up hem of my skirt before resting on my face.

LZY: Your father is waiting for us in the living room.

LZY: Come over after you’ve changed your clothes.

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 2】 

I rush back to my room at lightning speed and take off the intricate and ornate feather headpiece from my head.

After changing into a dress that won’t elicit resigned criticism from my father, I head down the stairs in the direction of the living room, my mind in turmoil.

The sparkling crystal chandelier bathes the spacious room ahead in bright light. From a distance, I can hear the sound of gratified laughter, intermingled with my father’s heartfelt sighs. 

MC’s Father: …Zeyan, don’t ever speak such words. If the disaster of that year had befallen me, your parents would have made the same choice.

MC’s Father: I remember when you first came to this home, MC was only five years old–– clinging to you all the time like a piece of sticky candy, oblivious to day and night. [1]

MC: Why is it that the moment I step in, I hear you speaking ill of me~

I walk over to my father and give him a kiss on the cheek, then take my seat next to Li Zeyan naturally.

He holds my gaze briefly before averting his eyes, but his tone carries a subtle softness that is almost imperceptible.

LZY: She was no bother. If anything, I find myself missing those times, too.

LZY: A plate of cookies was all she needed, and she’d joyfully sit by my desk, reading storybooks with me all night long.

MC: …I also really liked gege back then. No matter the time, you were always there to accompany me.

My father laughs, a wistful expression on his face. I also lift the corners of my lips to match the atmosphere, but my gaze lingers inquisitively on Li Zeyan’s elegant side profile.

Leaving… why did he have this idea all of a sudden?

I used to believe that no matter how much time elapsed… he would naturally remain by my side as a matter of course.

But this decision that came like a bolt from the blue seems to be telling me that I’m the only one who thought that way.

LZY: Yes, I’ve been keeping an eye on a promising aviation company. Their airplanes…

LZY: A number of stocks I acquired in the past few years have yielded good profits. After liquidating, my plans for the next steps include…

A baritone voice resounds from the seat next to me. Li Zeyan is recounting eloquently, seemingly answering some questions from my father, but I can’t pay attention in the slightest.

MC’s Father: …MC, won’t you raise a glass to your gege’s future?

My lower leg under the long table is gently touched, snapping me back to reality. I glance over to see Li Zeyan leisurely leaning back in his chair, his leather shoe brushing past me.

The brief touch just now was probably just an inadvertent act since he was shifting his sitting posture. However, it brings my attention to the fact that I’ve been staring at him for quite some time.

I let out a cough as an afterthought and quickly glance at my father.

MC: My apologies, I was a little lost in my thoughts just now, so…

MC’s Father: Of course, I am just as reluctant to part with him as you are… but I’m confident that when the time is right, Zeyan will come back to visit us.

This matter-of-fact comforting solace sweeps over my heart, gently veiling a certain “expectation” that I have never voiced.

An indescribable sourness swells within me. I raise my wine glass towards Li Zeyan beside me, wearing the same naive and coquettish smile as usual.

MC: …gege, here’s to every expectation of yours turning into reality.

Li Zeyan lowers his eyes, his slender fingertips promptly picking up a goblet glass from the table. Then, he leans in slightly towards me.

Accompanied by the soft clink of glasses, his deep and low voice resonates in my ears.

LZY: Thank you. I really like this toast.

LZY: I’ll turn these words into reality.

──────────

The moonlight behind the floor-to-ceiling windows filters through the sheer curtains, casting long and slender beams. I toss and turn on the soft bed for a long time before finally sitting up.

…Even if everything seems to be set in stone, I still want to fight for that last shred of possibility to make this man stay.

–

It’s very late at night, and the corridor is empty and quiet. I tread lightly past the door of my father’s room, then head briskly towards Li Zeyan’s room at the end of the corridor.

From a distance, I can see a sliver of light escaping from the room–– to my surprise, his door is only partially closed.

A soft meow reaches my ears. Holding my breath, I watch Li Zeyan seated on the sofa, comforting Betty, whose hind paws are entangled in a ball of yarn.

He cradles it in his arms with one hand, and his well-defined hand trails down the cat’s back, with a touch just right that is neither too firm nor too gentle, preventing its struggling attempts.

His fingertips swiftly probe into the entangled mess of threads. With a few simple movements, the trapped paws are liberated.

Betty: Meow~

Betty purrs contentedly, nuzzling its head against Li Zeyan’s shoulder. His eyes also seem to be dyed with a subtle smile.

The familiar scene overlaps with memories of the past, and suddenly, I feel a little dazed.

—

───── [FLASHBACK STARTS] ─────

Under the ardent daylight, the greenery in the courtyard stretched ponderously.

The doors and windows lining both sides of the mansion had been opened early in the morning, allowing the summer breeze to weave through unhindered, bringing with it a touch of rare, refreshing coolness.

I was huffing in anger as I strode down the corridor, heading towards Li Zeyan’s room in the most familiar manner, intending to “interrogate” him.

MC: GEGE! Did you stop…

I walked into his room, only to find a profound silence all around. Li Zeyan was lying on the sofa with his eyes closed and seemed to have drifted off to sleep.

Perhaps to block the dancing spots of dazzling sunlight, he casually rested the back of his left hand on his forehead, casting a gentle shadow over his eyelids.

His slender legs were rarely in such a relaxed posture, crossing casually. The business book in his hand had slipped to the floor at some point; its pages were blown by the breeze, producing a rustling sound.

Without realizing it, I lightened my steps and walked to the side of the sofa. I gazed at his dark strands of hair cascading down, gently resting on the prominent bridge of his nose.

Perhaps it was the light, but I suddenly noticed that there seemed to be some subtle changes on this face that I saw day and night.

Had his jawline become sharper? Or perhaps the knuckles of his hands seemed a little more pronounced? I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

I could only feel my heartbeat accelerating for no apparent reason, as though something that had been overlooked for a long time was now breaking through the surface.

As if drawn by an inexplicable attraction, I involuntarily leaned down towards him, wanting to touch his cheek. 

The next moment, I saw Li Zeyan suddenly open his eyes and lift his hand to clasp my wrist.

LZY: You…

He spoke in a low voice, his tone still carrying a hint of drowsiness. It seemed he regarded everything to be a dream.

His eyes took on a softer expression, and the hold of his palm on my hand did not loosen. Instead, he drew me even closer to him.

His breath caressed my face, and I could almost see my own reflection in his eyes. It was like almost in the next second, we would–––

MC’s Father: Where did you run off to… Betty?

My father’s inquiring voice suddenly echoed from a distance, akin to a pebble thrown into a lake, shattering the interplay of light and shadows before me.

Li Zeyan was frozen for a moment, and then a clarity flashed in his eyes as if finally waking up. He let go of my wrist. Suppressing the ineffable emotions in my heart, I swiftly distanced myself slightly.

LZY: …Why did you come in out of the blue?

MC: …the door was already ajar, and I didn’t know you were sleeping…

I muttered softly, but then I suddenly recalled something, my voice gaining a touch of confidence.

MC: I also have a question to ask. When James checked with you about whether I was available for a trip to the island next week, why did you reject him on my behalf?

Li Zeyan didn’t respond right away; he lowered his hand and picked up the rumpled book from the carpet.

LZY: Your father mentioned we have to go to the horse ranch next week; looks like you forgot.

LZY: Besides, there is no need to get involved with a guy whose family business is going downhill, yet he still dates a different girl every week.

MC: [girlie is stumped and flushed haha]  But before this, you said about Oren that he was secretly lingering in underground bars!

Li Zeyan calmly flipped open a page, not making eye contact with me.

LZY: [HEAVENS THE WAY HIS TONE DROPS HERE] I’m simply stating the facts. Besides, you’ll have better choices.

MC: Like who?

In my frustration, I kept pushing for an answer, but then, the air suddenly lapsed into silence, and Li Zeyan’s fingertips also came to a pause.

My heart suddenly began racing by a few beats, and I stood up from the sofa in an attempt to conceal myself.

MC: …anyway, I won’t allow you to interfere in this matter anymore!

In a rush, I walked towards the door as I spoke. But suddenly, I heard Li Zeyan calling out my name.

I turned around. The daylight outside the window had already transformed into the fading colors of twilight, and with that light falling on his back, I heard him speak.

LZY: I will give you that answer in the future.

LZY: Until then, don’t barge into my room unannounced like this again.

───── [FLASHBACK ENDS] ─────

────

[Tidbits]:

[1] MC’s dad mentions a specific type of candy here (牛皮糖 - nǚpítáng), which is made from sugar and sesame seeds; and has a chewy and sticky texture.

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 3】 

LZY: Come on inside, I haven’t locked the door.

Li Zeyan’s voice suddenly transmits from the room. I snap back to reality, only to realize that my hand, which I raised to knock, has been hanging in mid-air for quite some time.

Tightening my lips, I calmly walk into the room and seat myself next to him on the sofa, my eyes scanning the room.

In the long time that followed afterward, I have refrained from setting foot in this room again. In stark contrast to my memories, the surroundings appear conspicuously emptier.

In one corner of the room, a leather suitcase lay open… the realization of the fact that this person is leaving suddenly becomes palpable.

LZY: You’re here at this hour; is something wrong?

MC: [blushing]  …you can’t leave!

Two voices collide in unison. Before I can even register the situation, I have already grabbed hold of his hand.

LZY: …

The hazy lighting interweaves with the moonlight, and something seems to flash across Li Zeyan’s expression for a brief moment.

A searing warmth transmits from his palm, and in belated realization, I draw back my fingertips. However, I feel my hand being discreetly clasped, as if he is unwilling to let me escape.

LZY: What’s your reason for saying that?

MC: It’s not for any reason. I just want… gege to always remain by my side.

Even though it has been a long time since I have addressed him by that term when we are alone with each other, I still purposely soften my tone. I can’t help but expect that Li Zeyan would, just like in our childhood, give me that helpless glance and yield to my coquettish demands.

A silence hangs in the air as Li Zeyan lowers his gaze to mine. In the next moment, his palm enveloping my wrist loosens ever so slightly.

LZY: MC, I am not the same as the toys you wanted when we were little.

LZY: Just the word that you “want” this is not a reason enough to sway me.

I’m slightly stumped and speak without thinking.

MC: But we’ve been living a good life for all this time, haven’t we?

MC: We have the ancestral estates and assets, a steady stream of income… I don’t understand why you’d want to make any changes.

Li Zeyan lets out a very soft chuckle and tilts his head towards the window.

The lights of the distant structures shimmer brightly, reminiscent of a flowing banquet in the boundless night. They reflect in his eyes, exuding a mix of pride and ambition.

LZY: There is nothing in this world that remains unchanged forever, MC.

LZY: Even the prosperity that you indulge in today began after the soldiers returned from the European battlefield.

LZY: Everything we see now was beyond imagination just a few years ago.

LZY: This era can sweep away all outdated existence, and at the same time, it can also give people everything they desire… as long as they can grab hold of it.

Li Zeyan shifts his gaze back to me as he says this. Even though his tone seems to be gentler than usual, it also carries a hint of unswerving determination.

LZY: So, I had already made this decision a long time ago.

MC: …when?

Did it stem from the day he made his first profit in the stock market, relying on his own business acumen? Or was it when he caught the wind of the other “old money” people gossiping about him? Or perhaps it was even earlier?

In a state of bewilderment and urgency, I await a response, but Li Zeyan doesn’t answer my question. Instead, he just gazes at me fixedly, leaning slightly in my direction.

The tranquil glow of the lights paints his eyelashes, and my heart pounds wildly as I watch Li Zeyan approach. He lifts his hand, tucking a strand of hair that was lingering by my cheek behind my ear––

–– like an explanation, or perhaps a reassuring promise.

LZY: [in the most tender tone possible x1]  I am so happy that you’re here to persuade me to stay.

LZY: [x2]  But, there are certain things I want that I can only obtain by leaving.

──────────

Jennifer: Alright, honey, I’m not here to rush you about the manuscript or anything, even though that special column you promised me has been overdue for a solid three weeks~

My friend’s teasing reaches me through the light fabric. I pull down the covers sullenly, glancing at the blonde girl sitting at the edge of the bed.

MC: Once I’m back in the writing zone, I’ll submit it to the magazine first thing… but, setting that aside, did you manage to find out any news about him?

Even though I don’t explicitly utter Li Zeyan’s name, Jennifer shrugs her shoulders.

Jennifer: You know, your gege rarely attends any banquets within the circle.

Jennifer: I’ve been making discreet inquiries on the airline side, but all I’ve found is that there’s this new guy named Victor, whose company has become a rising star in the industry… but it doesn’t seem to have any connections with him.

—

[T/N]: Yes, his writers are using his EN name “Victor” as his pseudonym 😂😂

—

I press my lips together, thinking back to the day Li Zeyan left and how I was so angry that I refused to see him for one last time.

If only I had known earlier, I would have abandoned those inexplicable emotions, opened the door, and had a few words with him.

Jennifer: I have an idea. What if we were to spread the word that you’re planning to hold a banquet at the estate next month to reveal the person you’ve chosen to be your fiancé?

Jennifer: If he does have the intention toward you, there is no way he will able to keep it hidden.

I blink. This suggestion sends a few ripples through my heart–– daring as it is, it might be the most effective method.

With my tacit approval, this piece of news spreads from the mansion along with Jennifer’s departure, gradually circulating from one banquet to another.

Half a month slips away rapidly, yet I still don’t hear any updates. The day of the banquet approaches amidst apprehension and anticipation.

──────────

Large swaths of Phalaenopsis and Dendrobium orchids embellish various corners of the entire property, delicate and beautiful. Under the crystal chandeliers, the elegant fragrance of the flowers intermingle with the intense scent of perfumes, pervading the air.

With a smile, I express thanks or greetings to those who approach to congratulate me in pairs or groups, but my eyes continue to search for that figure I’ve been waiting for amidst the passing crowd.

Suddenly, a figure in a suit and leather shoes blocks my sight. A tall man walks over, raising his glass in a toast toward me.

Man: I’m Adam Arnott, a classmate of Jennifer’s from the academy.

The surname makes me realize that he hails from another wealthy family. I nod politely. However, the man shows no intention of leaving.

Man: I heard from Jennifer that you have a column in her magazine? Honestly, I find that quite impressive.

Man: In terms of killing time, it’s much more meaningful than being obsessed about choosing jewelry. Perhaps we can chat more…

Despite his courteous choice of words, the subtle condescension in his language leaves me agitated. I turn sideways with indifference, picking up a cupcake.

MC: Allow me to correct you. I don’t consider it as “something to kill time.” Had you read my articles, you wouldn’t have had that kind of judgment.

Man: Miss MC, you surely do not treat it as some serious work, do you? Forgive my bluntness, but it seems rather meaningless for people like us.

The way his attitude drips of being pampered as though he were a prince causes me to furrow my brows. Subconsciously, Li Zeyan’s image surfaces in my mind.

MC: Well, in that case, here’s to the everlasting prosperity of your family’s business… however, I’ve heard that nothing in this world remains unchanged forever.

The other party probably wasn’t expecting me to counter like this, causing the expression on his face to turn somewhat unpleasant.

Man: Why don’t we ask the talk of the town, the “new money” person, and whose viewpoint he stands by… Mr. Victor?

I nonchalantly turn my head and observe this rumored aviation tycoon from behind, involuntarily raising an eyebrow.

His slender physique is wrapped in a royal blue suit, complemented by a black and white polka dot tie around his neck. He stands out among the crowd of men, looking effortless yet debonair.

–– It’s the men’s fashion style I recommended in my articles. This person has actually read my column very carefully.

The corners of my lips can’t help but curl up slightly, watching that tall, straight figure turn around. But the instant I clearly see his visage, my lips part involuntarily.

With my heart beating like a drum, he walks to my side at a pace that is neither too fast nor too slow, bringing with him a subtle scent of sandalwood.

LZY: Of course, I stand by her viewpoint.

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 4】 

My eyes widen, and my gaze sweeps across the face of the person in front of me without even a single blink.

Perhaps due to the Southern sunshine, his complexion seems a shade deeper compared to the last time we saw each other, but his facial contours appear to be even more pronounced.

The fringes that he used to groom in a “proper” manner have now been slicked back into the trendiest hairstyle of the moment, showcasing his deep-set eyes and prominently arched eyebrows.

A pair of thin-rimmed glasses rest halfway on the bridge of his nose, not quite settled, and he casually pushes them up with his finger pad.

Through the lenses, a glimmer of smile seems to be shining in those deep eyes… or perhaps revealing certain emotions that were veiled in the past, but now, at this moment, seem evident with greater clarity.

LZY: The cream is about to melt.

As Li Zeyan speaks, he effortlessly takes the wobbling cupcake from my hand.

His broad and slender hand, wrapped in a moon-white glove, extends to pass me a piece of handkerchief.

Casual and comfortable, as if it weren’t a reunion after so long of separation, but rather our everyday interaction from back when we were still together at home.

I suppress the indescribable mix of sourness and joy in my heart, watching as the man converses with the people around him before raising an eyebrow.

Man: Ah, so you’re so Miss MC’s gege? Well, I suppose that explains your biased comment.

LZY: I believe the words I said just now are sufficiently objective.

LZY: If I’m not mistaken, with the inauguration of transatlantic flight routes, the stocks of shipping companies dropped at least ten percent. Your family’s business should be no exception.

LZY: To be able to maintain such unwavering optimism even in the midst of all these… I must say, Mr. Arnott’s attitude is truly admirable.

The man’s countenance grows slightly more ashen, while Li Zeyan stands next to me, calmly raising his glass to the crowd.

LZY: I rarely attend any social gatherings, so I haven’t formally announced it in a public setting. But six months ago, I had already disaffiliated myself from MC’s family.

LZY: And I’m not attending this banquet today in the identity of her “gege.”

I don’t know if it’s my illusion, but the tone of his latter statement seemed to have a slightly slower pace, triggering my heartbeat to accelerate uncontrollably.

Not as my “gege”… then, in what identity did he come? Perhaps, he knows about the news I’ve put out?

I clink my goblet glass with him, trying my hardest to maintain my usual casual expression, and lift my head slightly.

MC: I suppose I ought to be thanking you. After all, you’ve just returned, and here you are, immediately coming to my rescue.

Li Zeyan and I hold each other’s gazes for a brief moment. A subtle curve graces the corners of his lips as he also softens his voice.

LZY: I was being sincere, though.

LZY: I haven’t missed a single column you’ve written in  《The New Yorker》.

A wave of warmth accompanies his words, traveling from my ears to the throbbing center in my chest.

I gaze into those familiar and serene eyes, gently tapping the tie hanging down from his neck.

MC: Well, in that case, allow this writer to make one more suggestion.

MC: If it were replaced with a corrugated pattern in the same color, it would complement your suit today even better.

Li Zeyan sets down the goblet glass in his hand on the long table.

LZY: I didn’t bring an extra tie. Can I leave it to your care?

MC: Of course, come with me.

As I speak, my hand that was initially reaching to grasp his palm pauses mid-motion, and in the end, I settle for only holding onto his cuff.

He and I walk through the clustered bouquets of flowers and the crowd of people in their fragrant clothes, making our way toward the upper floor of the hall in a manner that couldn’t be more familiar.

Eyes from all around fall upon our departing figures. I don’t know if these people noticed anything, but I don’t care either.

All I know is that from the moment of parting, the thought that I painstakingly disregarded for the longest time became gradually clear: I desire to be with him in an identity that goes beyond our familial ties.

Will he be angry? Or will he helplessly discourage my intentions? Or perhaps, in reality, he does harbor certain unspoken feelings towards me…

──────────

Suppressing my tumultuous heartbeat, I close the door, and the chatter and music outside finally fade away.

The air falls silent for a moment. I let go of Li Zeyan’s cuff, turn around to rummage through the intricate accessories, and speak as if casually inquiring.

MC: Finally, I can breathe a sigh of relief… have you had a chance to meet Daddy yet?

LZY: [the muted joy in his tone HHHHH]  Yeah, I went to his room to say hello after coming back, and we talked for a long time.

MC: Ah, he must’ve been so delighted; after all, he reminisces about you every now and then. “If Zeyan were here…,” is a sentence he says more often than not.

I exaggeratedly mimic my father’s manner of speaking, and my eyes secretly fall on Li Zeyan, hoping to catch his expression.

MC: You said earlier, “not as my gege”... then, in what identity are you here?

Maintaining a brisk tone, I continue sifting through without pausing my movements, as if this will be able to cloak my erratic heartbeat.

Li Zeyan doesn’t answer my question, and his footsteps come to a stop behind me. Even though there is a somewhat elusive distance between us, I can almost feel his body heat.

LZY: I’m not the one who can give that answer.

I turn around, somewhat puzzled, only to see a black, gold-plated box being extended towards me.

The huge ruby inside, set against the velvet backdrop, sparkles with a flash of dazzling brilliance.

MC: This…

LZY: A gift for you. A certain someone mentioned before that the quality of gemstones in New York isn’t good enough these days.

LZY: So, it was transported here on my company’s first transatlantic flight, all the way from Europe.

Li Zeyan removes the ruby from the box as he speaks, placing it in the palm of my hand.

The slight coolness of the gemstone accompanies the warmth of his fingertips, and I hear Li Zeyan speak in a soft tone.

LZY: Even the most impossible fantasies can become reality.

LZY: MC, as long as you say the word.

I’m utterly dazed, suddenly recalling the brief conversation we had under the stairs the night before Li Zeyan left.

From the past to the present, he has always borne the weight of all my wishes, even if I’ve only mentioned them in passing.

The sound of my heartbeat drums against my ears. Without uttering a word, I simply tug on his tie and rise on tiptoes towards this man who used to be my “gege.”

The distance between us bridges bit by bit, my somewhat quivering breath fanning across Li Zeyan’s face.

He watches me in complete silence, his eyes burning. He seems to be waiting for some form of confirmation, yet he doesn’t evade my actions.

That is, until, a fleeting kiss lands on the edge of his lips, and we briefly exchange our warmth with each other. I pull back slightly, avert my eyes, and speak.

MC: …what if this is what I desire?

LZY: …

I don’t hear his response. In the next second, my waist is suddenly shackled in place.

A deep kiss, which has been held in check for a long time, finally descends, erasing the last vestige of distance.

Two sets of lips that have never touched each other before roll back and forth, their inexperienced and slightly shaky intertwining exchange breaths that have long been familiar but never explored so deeply.

In those eyes of his, I see emotions mirroring my own. Patiently restrained feelings, a fluttering heart… but now added with a touch of certainty.

LZY: I’ve probably held onto this expectation for longer than you.

LZY: What I longed for has always been right there within sight… and you made it a reality for me.

The brilliant chandelier overhead leaves shimmering spots in the field of vision, leaving one slightly dizzy. It feels like a firework that has been brewing for a long time has finally burst forth.

Turns out, we both harbored the same feelings all along.

The eyes that turned to look back when we passed by each other, the hands that reached out to touch only to retract… all the entanglements and poignant emotions of the past gently dissipate in this moment.

I close my eyes and hear his voice resonate, but now carrying with it a deeper undertone of mirth than ever before.

LZY: Allow this gem to be a commemoration of this special occasion.

LZY: For that first dance in a while, how about sharing it with me?

────────────────────────────────

[Tidbits]:

[2] so in love with this imagery here. “白月光” (white moonlight) in chinese means first love but it comes with the connotation of something “unattainable.” here, it’s the color of his gloves, the “barrier” between their hands truly touching~ 🤧

[3] “ruby” is a symbol of passion, protection, everlasting love-- indeed the perfect move for Li Zeyan to choose this stone as his ~betrothal gift~ 🥺

[4] welp, if it wasn’t clear already LOL, sharing the “first dance” at this banquet is their official announcement of their engagement~ 🤭🤧

──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────

【Anika’s personal notes】 

link to my twitter meltdowns for easier navigation LOL: ♡ || ♡

─────────────

[eskiix]

Roberto/OC Enemies-to-Lovers, Post-Villa

Chapter 6

Read on Ao3

Summary: Louise cares too much about everything, and the only thing Roberto cares about is his career. Neither is strictly true, but that's how everyone sees them. Including each other. —-- Just when Louise thinks everyone’s moving on and leaving her behind, she’s handed the golden opportunity to fix everything by planning her best friend’s hen do. At least, that’s the idea, anyway. One week of sun, sea, cocktails, clubbing, and… the world’s most arrogant pilot.

[humberg]

Detachment

Detachment can be both physical and emotional. It refers to being disconnected from the feelings or the presence of other people. This can involve an inability or an unwillingness to get involved in the emotional lives of other people or an inability to engage in the moment. While this detachment may protect people from stress, hurt, and anxiety, it can also interfere with a person's psychological, social, and emotional well-being. Detachment can sometimes occur as a coping mechanism when people are faced with stressful or difficult situations.

It is made clear throughout that Kerry struggles with detachment regarding his mental heath. Being detached from the world can make you lost within your own head. Pointed out by Nancy that only Kerry and Johnny were friends within the band during the Samurai days, it was after the loss of Johnny that Kerry detached himself from the world and those around him.

Kerry's coping mechanism, to be closed off within his four walls and produce music. And although it is hinted that he does make an effort to form attachments as shown by the marriage and separation from his ex-wife Louise, his inner demons still play an overwhelming factor in terms of how he engages with those around him and the lifestyle that he lives. In an extreme case, his lack of emotional attachment toward others had him destroy equipment and even threaten Us Cracks for his own gain.

Paired with his depression and anxiety, his lifestyle is shown to be chaotic when we first find him in his trashed villa .Briefly reunited with Johnny and introduced to V many years after Johnny's death, although Kerry is quite detached from V at first with his unexpected departures. It is due to his attachment with Johnny, and his adventures with V and the familiarity that came with having Johnny nearby, that Kerry finally got to have his closure with Silverhand and finally welcome someone else into his life.

.

.

.

.

Ahhhh! These stills took an insane amount of time to do, not to mention I had to move every NPC that sat on top of them every five minutes 😭 But I think I did pretty good in the end 🥳

We should never be afraid to talk about mental health, it is just as important as physical health. I hope you are all doing okay on this lovely sunday evening!

[postcard-from-the-past]

"Marie-Louise" villa in Franceville-Plage, Normandy region of France

French vintage postcard

[elvenbeard]

Long rambly headcanon post about Kerry's sexuality incoming (because I have been thinking about this ever since I first met him in game and I wanna write it down somehwere).

Disclaimer: this is my personal headcanon. You don't have to agree with any of this, this is for fun and games. If you do happen to agree with this though hmu bc I need someone to talk Kerry with desperately xDD

So, first of all: I think Kerry himself doesn't give a fuck about labels. Too old for this shit, confident in his own sexuality, what difference does it make? Labels are great for those who need them, he's not against them at all, but I don't think it's something that's he's thinking about a lot. Is he gonna put on a rainbow shirt for Pride? Yeah why not, especially if his partner would like to go protest and celebrate togther. But I think it's not a top priority of his (at least not anymore, in 2077, at the ripe old age of 89. A young Kerry living in our times was probably louder and a lot more outspoken, but in this post I'm gonna talk about my thoughts on grandpa Kerry).

So, let's dive into the game. When the topic of Louise came up during my first playthrough (the first and only time sadly, I'd love to know more about her as a character - more headcanons incoming in a minute), internally I went like... what? Where does this come from? Not in a judgemental way, just honest surprise, because up until this point, Kerry had only been depicted as attracted to guys (making the saddest puppy eyes at Johnny, making out with a fan backstage, Johnny's various comments on him, their sexual-tension-filled relationship with each other). Beyond that, what we know from Kerry himself, he seemed to have tried to get something going with Ariel (who I think is a man - correct me if I'm wrong, it's been a while since I played the actual conversation between him and Johnny at the villa and I'm not sure if he mentions Ariel's gender there). In the Temperance ending, if V was in a relationship with Kerry, Kerry will recount his other shitty exes of which at least one was also a man, and in the Sun ending, when his (male) manager calls, V can ask if that is "an ex of [his]".

That being said... yeah, Kerry flirts with V regardless of gender. Why? Maybe he doesn't know that himself, maybe he thinks V is cute, maybe it's a power play, maybe he just wants to annoy Johnny who cannot escape the situation, who knows, anything goes. His whole rockstar persona is this carefree, laidback sexgod thing, of course he's gonna be flirty. He is flirty with the Us Cracks girls, too (at least I'm getting the impression - they definitely are flirty with him and he doesn't mind, but it could also all be part of the show). So me personally, yeah, I think Kerry is bisexual, but with a strong preference for guys (sincerely, me, a bisexual who also has a preference for guys). Maybe Louise was his bisexual awakening, or a once-in-a-lifetime thing that never happened again with any other woman, or a mix of both. See also: Kerry turns a female-presenting V down when things get serious. Flirting is fun, she is nice and kind and into it, so why the hell not? But he's not gonna lead her on when he notices she wants more than what he's willing to give. Friends can flirt with each other without it turning romantic or sexual. And yeah, I think Kerry is generally attracted to people regardless of what's in their pants, but as soon as things get serious he is infinitely more likely to go for a guy than for a woman.

That being said (and now we're back at Louise), I think it's absolutely fair to headcanon him as gay, too. There is so little we know about the nature of his only (canonically depicted, spelled-out "that's my ex-wife" style) long-term relationship with a woman. This is the dark future, where you can genetically engineer your child to look however you want it to look. Maybe Kerry and Louise were just two sad and lonely individuals that were like "let's raise kids together to fill the void in our hearts!" - and, using Kerry's words, that went as well as you'd expect it. Could be that Louise is a lesbian who wanted a family and kids, and Kerry, being a close friend of hers, said yeah let's do it (and maybe I won't be so fucking lonely anymore and find a new purpose in being a father)! And for reason xyz it was easier to raise the kids if they were also married (something something about getting married to be allowed to have kids - I etiher heard or read something in game once about a 1-child-license or something, again, dark future fuckery could be involved here). Also, historically, there are certainly countless examples of queer men marrying queer women to get their conservative families off their backs. With how little we know about Louise, not even how old she was when they got together, it could also be something like that. And (turning back now to Kerry's flirty behaviour around women when someone else is watching) everything else could have been part of the show - for families, for the media, for the public, for the fans, everything goes.

What I'm trying to say, there's hundreds of ways to headcanon a fictional character's sexuality. Maybe Louise and Kerry were friends with benefits, maybe they fell madly in love, maybe there's more women in Kerry's past than what the game depicts (there's countless women's clothing items across his villa - that could be anything from leftovers of wild parties in which he wasn't involved to him taking home groupies and everything beyond that and inbetween).

You could also just say "Kerry is gay cause I say so, that's as deep as it gets" and that is just as valid. Don't be like me and spend your sleepless nights thinking about this because my brain works in mysterious ways. If you wanna headcanon him as gay because it brings you comfort, wholeheartedly, go for it. If you wanna heacanon him as not turning down your female V because it brings you comfort, go for it, by all means! If you wanna headcanon him as cis, trans, everything inbetween, hell yes, be my guest!!

Kerry is a fictional character, he's not gonna be offended or hurt. And every real person who gets upset about how someone else likes to play with their favourite pixel ken doll then, well... touch some grass @ that person. Headcanons do not take away representation from marginalized groups. Block and blacklist what you don't wanna see and move on, it's so easy (and on that note, anyone who wants to be weird or hateful on this post is gonna get blocked, too xD).

As I said, this is all my thoughts and opinions, if you don't agree, that's fair, I get it, I don't agree with 80% of headcanons I come across (not even just regarding a characters sexuality, but in general). But yeh I'd also love to talk if you have similar views on him!

On that note... happy pride xD🏳️‍🌈 be kind to each other!

[justforbooks]

In 1943 the artist Françoise Gilot, who has died aged 101, accompanied her teacher, the surrealist painter Endre Rozsda, to the Gare de l’Est in Paris. Rozsda was Jewish and Hungarian; the occupying Germans had begun rounding up foreign Jewish people, and he was leaving for the apparent safety of Budapest. As his train steamed out of the station, the 21-year-old Gilot wailed: “But what am I to do?” Her teacher, laughing, shouted: “Don’t worry! Who knows? Three months from now, you may meet Picasso!”

Seven decades later Gilot was to recall those words as both prophecy and curse. Two months after Rozsda’s departure she was having dinner at Le Catalan, a Paris restaurant patronised by Left Bank artists. Halfway through the meal a short, bull-necked man approached her table proffering a bowl of cherries: it was Pablo Picasso. Captivated by the fine-boned Gilot, Picasso, 40 years her senior, invited her to his studio in the Rue des Grands Augustins. By the end of the summer they were lovers.

The mismatched pair were to stay together for a decade, during which time Gilot bore him two children, Paloma and Claude. Picasso remained married to his first wife, Olga Khokhlova, throughout the relationship.

As Gilot was to recall in her bestselling book Life With Picasso (1964), he set out to undermine her from the start. “One day,” she wrote, “we were looking at dust dancing in sunlight … [Picasso] said, ‘Nobody has any real importance to me. As far as I’m concerned, people are like those little grains. It takes only a push of the broom and out they go.’” Later, angry at her lack of attention to him, he burned her cheek with a cigarette.

From the early 1950s, Gilot had begun to exhibit with members of the French réalités nouvelles school and when, finally, she was given a show of her own at Galerie Louise Leiris in Paris in 1952, Picasso refused to go to the opening. He had, he said, seen all the paintings already. “Pablo wanted me continually pregnant, because then I was weaker,” Gilot recalled. “After the second child, I said enough was enough. Picasso made this sculpture of a pregnant woman and when I told him I didn’t like it, he hacked her feet off.” By her own telling, Gilot retorted: “I can walk with my own feet,” and in September 1953, she did.

All this and a great deal more was revealed in Life With Picasso, ensuring the book’s huge and immediate success: it sold a million copies in the first year. Enraged, Picasso tried to prevent publication. When he failed to do that, he set about destroying his ex-partner’s career, refusing to show his work at any gallery that showed hers, and cutting contact with their children. Already, in 1955, following Gilot’s marriage to the artist Luc Simon, the Leiris gallery had quietly dropped her.

That, at least, was her story. Whether the gallery would have taken her on in the first place without Picasso’s cachet is a moot point. Although she would later insist that she had been attracted to the older man only because all the men of her own age were off at war, Gilot enjoyed the trappings of being the partner of Picasso.

It was through him that she met Georges Braque, Marc Chagall, Joan Miró, Gertrude Stein and Paul Éluard. Shortly before she decided to move in with Picasso, he had taken her to stay with Henri Matisse at the latter’s villa, Le Rêve. In 1990, with her ex-lover dead, Gilot published another book about him, Matisse and Picasso: A Friendship in Art. This, too, was a financially rewarding bestseller. “I was capable of understanding the whole problem of money,” Gilot said, blithely. “You might say that I am a little bit hard-boiled. I have to admit that I was never so much in love with anyone that I could not consider my own plan.”

After her separation from Picasso, Gilot kept their villa, La Galloise, using the profits from sales of her books to extend it. Summers in the early 60s were spent cruising the Greek islands with Paloma and Claude on a chartered yacht with a crew of three.

From these trips came what was to be perhaps Gilot’s most coherent body of artwork, the Labyrinth series. Untitled (Red and Yellow) (1963) is typical of this, being powerful if compositionally unresolved. Inevitably critics descried Picasso in its southern colours and anguished forms. This was unfair. Untitled (Red and Yellow) was, generically, a work of its time, neither more nor less Picasso-esque than many other French paintings of the day.

In return, some of Picasso’s best portraits had been of Gilot: his biographer, John Richardson, was of the view that: “Picasso took from her rather more than she took from him.” Nonetheless, Gilot remained dogged by his shadow, and not just as an artist.

She was divorced from Simon in 1962, and in 1969, in California, was introduced to the American virologist Jonas Salk, the developer of the polio vaccine. Salk was instantly taken by the elegant Frenchwoman. Pursuing her to Paris, he asked her to marry him. Gilot, by now wary of powerful men, replied that she would, provided they spend six months a year apart. Salk agreed.

For the 25 years of their marriage Gilot would divide half her time between Paris and Manhattan, spending the other half with her husband in La Jolla, California. This seemed to suit both well enough, although there were raised eyebrows among Salk’s friends and colleagues.

In its report of their wedding, the Philadelphia Inquirer described Gilot as “mistress of the late Pablo Picasso”, but she was, apparently, untouched by such barbs. Asked by an interviewer how she had managed to end up with two of the world’s most eminent men, Gilot replied baldly: “Lions mate with lions.”

She was born in Neuilly-sur-Seine, an exclusive suburb of Paris. Her father, Emile, a rich manufacturer, was an authoritarian figure, forcing his left-handed only child to write with her right hand and insisting that she study law rather than art. Françoise’s lessons with Rozsda were a secret between herself and her mother, Madeleine (nee Renoult), a keen amateur artist. Scandalised at his daughter’s mésalliance with Picasso, Emile cut all ties with her for a decade.

Free of her father, Gilot signed up to study at the Académie Julian, but if Emile had been autocratic, his tyranny paled beside that of Picasso. She was, though, unique among his women in having survived him: his first wife was deeply affected by his treatment of her, as was another lover, Dora Maar. The model Marie-Thérèse Walter hanged herself; his second wife, Jacqueline Roque, shot herself. Gilot lived on, painting every day, increasingly in her vast, barrel-vaulted flat in Manhattan’s Upper West Side and working on projects for the Guggenheim Museum in New York. In 2021, her 1965 portrait of her daughter, Paloma à la Guitare, sold for $1.3m, and a retrospective of her work was held at the Musée Estrine, Saint Remy de Provence.

She was made a member of the Légion d’Honneur in France in 1990, promoted to an officer of the order in 2009.

Afflicted by growing blindness, she was as unsentimental about herself as she was the world at large. In her mid 90s she said: “I’m done with life. When I was 86, I thought, this is the end, because this is the age my mother died. Eighty-nine seemed impossible, and 90 was really the last straw. I thought, ‘You are going to have to take your own life if you ever want to die.’” As to her critics, she remained philosophical: “You have to admit that most women who do something with their lives have been disliked by almost everyone.”

Salk died in 1995. Gilot is survived by Paloma, Claude and a daughter, Aurelia, from her marriage to Simon.

🔔 Françoise Gilot, artist and writer, born 26 November 1921; died 6 June 2023

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at http://justforbooks.tumblr.com