#UnreQUITed

[jojr0]

he wants to kiss him sooooo bad

[astrxbtchs]

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★ (𝐌𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐥𝐲) 𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐲/𝐀𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨 𝐎𝐛𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 ☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

𓆩♡𓆪 Unrequited synastry can be seen with vertex making hard aspects to the moon. Since vertex is an angular placement, it will be felt by the vertex person. The vertex person is affected by the planet person more bc they are the source of energy that the vertex is being activated with. With a moon square vertex for example, the moon person will provoke deep emotions out of the vertex person simply because they activate this energy from them. They feel more because that energy is invoked out of them, causing intense emotions.

It reminds me of this for some reason:🧍🏾‍♀️-> > >🧍🏾‍♀️ Basically the person on the left (moon person) naturally projecting their energy onto the person on the right (vertex person) and the vx taking it all in and becoming heavily affected. You can tell a bit how that vertex angle can be a bit one sided ***I really hope you understand this interpretation lol this is just how my brain computes things for me to understand it. I hope it helps

𓆩♡𓆪 Another unrequited aspect could be Neptune Square/Opposition to mercury. This can show lies and deception being told by the Neptune person. Communication exchanged between the two can be very hazy and difficult to understand, as if you never know where you stand with this person and words are easily misinterpreted and taken the wrong way. There's feeling as if you can't completely let your guard down or trust this person, for fear that they may be lying to you.

** experiencing synastry with mercury in the 12th can feel the same way.

S/N, please let me know if you guys want a whole post on my observations/opinions of unrequited synastry in a chart. I have a lot of ideas on this so tell me if that is something you would be interested in ;)

𓆩♡𓆪 Keep in mind when looking at synastry aspects, that the aspects with 6 degrees or tighter are really the ones you need to really be paying attention to. When aspects get too wide in a synastry chart the overall energy of it is dimmed and doesn't affect the connection as much as closer orbs.

𓆩♡𓆪 Having Chiron in the 3rd house is constantly being self-conscious about how you communicate with others and always looking back on the embarrassing/awkward encounters with others and inwardly cringing

𓆩♡𓆪 Every Capricorn rising and Sag rising are naturally popular and will always have a group of friends. A Sag rising will naturally attract people to them with the bright aura they exude. People will want to be around Capricorn risings to feel like they are "in", these people have the influence of power and overall give a status image that people like to attach to so they can feel that way as well.

𓆩♡𓆪 I feel Capricorn risings are one of the few in the ascendant signs that can come close to rivaling the intensity a Scorpio rising has. Imagine these two in a room seeing who can gain the most control over the other first lol. I can only imagine if in romantic attraction this connection is INSATIABLE because neither of them would want to give in to each other first. I feel they both put each other on edge.

𓆩♡𓆪 I know we talk about the 1st house/ascendant for our looks but can we talk about the 10th house also playing a big role in our outward appearance as well. 10th house talks about our representation to the world that we have the best ability to control, whereas 1st house is unconsciously there on display.

𓆩♡𓆪 (ANY) Virgo placements will go through the most traumatizing experience ever and you would never know because they will appear so put together. Or they will act so unfazed as if they didn’t just tell you the most life altering moment they just went/lived through.

**if you are a virgo rising my heart really goes out to you. I can't imagine living my life in a state of complete psychoanalysis of everything. Almost as if your mind can take over you a lot because of the constant examination of every single thing going on in your life, I know that can be quite exhausting. Y'all are so strong🫶🏾

𓆩♡𓆪 Are you a master manipulator or do you just have mercury in 7th or mercury in Gemini/Libra?

𓆩♡𓆪 I don't understand why people don't give credit to how BINDING moon in the 10th house synastry can be!!! Romantically, this synastry gets the rep of being cold and detached, which is true in a sense. In the beginning, expressing emotions to each other can feel uncomfortable and awkward, causing for a slow burn relationship to form. (often times it fizzles out) Once these people get over that hump and are able to trust one other to fully open up it is absolutely BEAUTIFUL. This is the house of Saturn so when feelings get involved here they rarely go away since they take so long to form. Saturn is not into the act of letting go of things at all and is often life long. If a breakup has occurred with this synastry those feelings will simmer within you forever, and its damn near impossible to forget about them. This will probably be one of those contacts that will hurt the most and you will feel for a long time.

𓆩♡𓆪 Lilith in the 7th and Pisces Venus have a tendency to choose people that they know are not good for them. For both placements, the danger of what a person could do to them is like a drug. It is not uncommon for these people to find themselves in relationship scandals and affairs. Whether they are the ones doing the cheating or the other way around, they will most likely experience both situations.

- Lilith in the 7th choose the wrong people because they are attracted to passionate toxicity.

-Pisces Venus often choose the wrong people because of an idealized version they have created or because they think they are able to fix a person. 

**if you have both of these placements, may god be with you 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

𓆩♡𓆪 Venus in the 3rd house synastry is most likely someone you met online, in school, close to your home or places you frequent. It will be so easy for these people to find anything in the world to talk about. They have similar interests and love the same things, although they could talk for days and not get to anything beneath the surface. They like to keep things lighthearted so if there are any issues they are experiencing with one another they tend to avoid it to not ruffle the feathers of one another and keep things peaceful, passive aggression can be a thing here. Romantically, this will be a person you will not be able to get off your mind, you will constantly be thinking of each another throughout your day. You might not even know how much this person actually thinks of you because things can come off so surface level, feelings may not be discussed.

𓆩♡𓆪 Sun/Venus is the 2nd house synastry can either boost your confidence or completely destroy it. Can also be an indicator of gold digger/sugar baby placement. The 2nd house person will be completely enamored by the sun/venus person. It will be easy for the sun/venus person to trust the 2nd house person. The 2nd house person can tend to view the sun/venus person as a object. Often wanting to spend money on them to make them happy. More so with the Venus here, the 2nd house person loves to spend money on them to make them look physically appealing. This will be the person buying you clothes, shoes, hairstyles and they even LOVE buying you food. Dinner dates are a MUST.

𓆩♡𓆪 Mars in the 2nd house synastry is ultimate marriage material. If you have this with someone its soo good for long-term partnerships. These too will not be able to keep their hands off each other, they are so sexually appealing to one another it will be so hard. The mars person will love to be the provider for the second house person. They will be the one to go out and work multiple jobs if they have to just to get the second house person everything they want, and they will love to do it. This couple will be SUPER sensual together. ⋇⊶⊰❣⊱⊷⋇ ⋇⊶⊰❣⊱⊷⋇⋇⊶⊰❣⊱⊷⋇ ⋇⊶⊰❣⊱⊷⋇⋇⊶⊰❣⊱⊷⋇ ⋇⊶⊰❣⊱⊷⋇ ♡ Thank you babes for reaching this point, love youssss♥️ If you enjoyed I would love any feedback any you have experienced any of these placements ;) I hope you like the longer, more in-depth posts. What would you guys like to see next?

[shadowhaert]

unrequited yearning

hanya yanagihara / iain s. thomas / sue zhao / marie rutkoski / u.k / a.k ramanujan / u.k / buffy the vampire slayer

[disastrluv]

feeling pretty doomed by the narrative rn.

[saintpavlov]

he doesn't mean to make you sad, you know that. it's just that, when atsumu's upset it becomes everyone's problem—yours especially.

you don't know how it starts. atsumu had been bouncing off the walls just a moment ago, drunk off of booze and the afterglow of victory. you don't know which one of his teammates had invited her to the after-party, just that right now, you can't help but hate them.

it's just for a second, but you catch it. the way his eyes immediately dim, how his hand falters around yours. you don't want to jump to conclusions, but it's obvious—atsumu's in love with her. painfully so.

he drops your hand as if burnt and turns away, letting himself be carried off into another conversation. atsumu laughs loud enough to be heard over the music, a deafening house mix that thuds through your chest like a second heartbeat. anyone else might not spare him a second glance, but you know that when atsumu laughs that loud there's something he's trying to hide. then, as if remembering that you're still there, atsumu turns over his shoulder. you answer before he can ask the question.

"no no, go ahead. go have fun!"

atsumu tilts his head, though you know he's only asking to be polite. "are you sure?"

you smile. "no worries."

it's a bold-faced lie, but atsumu's never been that good at paying attention. he returns your smile with an excited nod, letting himself be led away by the shoulders. "don't go anywhere!" he shouts, though you know later on he'll forget to come find you. that's the way it always is. always has been.

you nurse your drink against your chest—water, you don't have the stomach tonight—and try to look on the bright side, if there is one. atsumu had been the one to invite you, hadn't he? and though you're still "just friends", he'd held your hand earlier, so that has to count for something, right?

it's useless. you down your water in one go, figuring that if you treat it like alcohol it might work like it is. it doesn't, and now you're alone at this party with an empty cup and an even emptier hand.

you sigh and snake your way out of the kitchen, making your way up the stairs to the first door that opens. the upstairs is off-limits, but you hope that whoever owns this room is drunk enough to be forgiving. you don't even bother to turn on the lights, and instead flop backwards onto the bed. you feel the music downstairs rather than hearing it, a steady thump-thump-thump that shakes through you from head to toe.

you close your eyes, trying very hard not to think about atsumu and the girl he's still in love with downstairs. it's not your place to be bothered, that you know, but something in your chest still aches at the thought. you've loved atsumu since before he met her, after all. it's a shame he hasn't noticed. or maybe he's not noticing on purpose, which is considerably worse.

"woe is me," you say to no one, your voice biting with sarcasm. you're not shocked at how things are turning out, moreso that you thought it'd turn out any differently. with a sigh, you close your eyes. atsumu will find you eventually. and if he doesn't, then someone else will. you'd rather be cursed at for trespassing than anywhere downstairs, faking a smile as you wait for atsumu like a well-trained dog. at least here you can lick your wounds in private.

you don't know how much time has passed when you feel something press into your side, warm and solid. arms wrap around you: one slung over your waist, the other snaking its way under your head. you turn in confusion, seeing nothing in the dark.

whoever's holding you down reeks heavily of liquor, and their arm feels like a dead weight around you. when you try to pull it off they hold onto you tighter, mumbling something incoherent under their breath. "um, hey," you say loudly, voice hoarse with sleep. "get off of me."

the person beside you stirs, and the bed dips slightly as they prop themselves up. they mumble your name under their breath, and in the dark you can make out the vague outline of a face.

with a start, you realize you recognize that voice. "...osamu?"

he lies back down, bringing you along with him. "h-hey," you start to protest, but osamu's grip grows stronger in response.

"don't leave," he mumbles, as you try to sit up.

"but—"

"m'head hurts. shhh." osamu shushes you, curling up against your side. his hair tickles the side of your reddening cheek.

"hey, osamu." you try to move out from under his arm again, to no avail. "you're really drunk."

"and?" he counters, pulling you closer, almost possessively. "just pretend for a little while."

that catches you off guard. "pretend?"

"it's dark, so it's easier," osamu refuses to elaborate. "c'mon. it's my birthday."

"osamu, your birthday's in october."

"is it?" there's an uncharacteristic cheekiness to osamu's voice, one that makes you turn your head towards him in surprise. you can't see him, but you can tell from the warmth that his face is only inches away. "well it's somebody's birthday, somewhere."

something touches your cheek—osamu's hand? no, his face. somewhere near his chin, guessing by the stubble that scratches your skin. "just do me a favor and pretend i'm him," osamu says, and in that moment he sounds scarily sober.

"wh-what?" you can't help the way your mouth hangs open at the request, your stomach feeling like it's about to drop out of you.

"you heard me," osamu mumbles, back to being drunk again. "pretend i'm him. you know what i mean."

"you—what—that's not—"

"am i wrong?" osamu presses, raising his voice like he's imitating his brother. it works. osamu's fingers trace across your face, reading the shock on your face like braille. you turn your head and press your nose to his neck—no cologne, only the soft smell of skin. it can't be atsumu, but for a moment, you're fooled.

osamu tilts his head and sighs, slow and sweet. and when his lips brush your forehead, it's like everything you've ever dreamed. "i'm right," he breathes, nestling his head against your shoulder. it's not a question anymore, but a fact. "i'm right," he sing-songs, still painfully drunk.

"osamu—"

a hand covers your mouth, warm and firm. softer than atsumu's, and just a bit bigger. "don't say my name like that," he whispers, his voice hot against the shell of your ear, "say it the way you say his."

you swallow an audible gulp. "osa—osamu?" you try again.

osamu shakes his head. needy hands pull you in by the waist. you feel osamu's lips kiss up the side of your neck. "not like that," he murmurs.

"o-osa...mu..." you're breathless and dizzy. you feel osamu's smile against the underside of your jaw.

"better," he grins, and this time, his lips find yours.

it ends before you can even react. osamu pulls away with a shaky exhale, as if he's slowly waking from a dream. his eyes shine back at you in the dark, wide and unblinking.

he opens his mouth to speak. "i—"

"you're drunk," you say immediately, and push him away by the chest.

osamu doesn't let you. he brings his hands over yours and keeps them there, and under the thin cotton of his shirt you feel his heart beating rabbit-fast. "so? i'll still want you when i'm sober."

his words choke your own out of your throat. "osamu...i can't—"

"so don't. don't do anything. just stay the night." there's a desperation in his words that makes your stomach flip. osamu holds onto you like he's afraid to let go. "please."

it's late, and you're tired. atsumu's in love with someone that isn't you, but osamu's arms are warm enough to make you forget. you think to yourself: is it selfish if he's willing? are you cruel for wanting to pretend?

you wrap your arms around his neck and osamu relaxes, melting into you the same way butter does on toast. he's soft, comforting. familiar, but not the same. osamu's lips brush on your neck again and the impact shudders through your spine like electricity. he takes his hands and rubs them over your arms, thinking that you're cold. you don't want to tell him that in reality you're burning up, feeling hot everywhere he touches.

"thank you," osamu murmurs into your hair.

"for what?"

"stayin'."

and when osamu kisses you a second time, you don't have the heart to push him away.

[merik72-blog]

I don't think I can sufficiently capture the pain in Nicole's unrequited... crush. But I tried. I'm a little late for national lesbian day. But I tried.

"Ryan Sheckler is the only guy who who could possibly look hot on a skateboard. I mean just look at him! How's that fair?"

Is there a way I can ask for a kiss without being a needy bitch like Ari?

Probably not.

[wishing-for-deathx]

You know what’s selfish? Breaking someone to the point where they don’t live. Breaking them so bad that they cant be fixed anymore. When they think of life, it’s synonymous to agony. They just survive each day. It’s not selfish to want to end it. It’s liberation from suffering. It’s selfish to do this to someone repeatedly and ask them to stay.

Why should I stay when no ever did.

[liquidlightandrunningtrees]

Romantic obsession is my first language. I live in a world of fantasies, infatuation and love poems. Sometimes I wonder if the yearning I’ve felt for others was more of a yearning for yearning itself. I’ve pined insatiably and repeatedly: for strangers, new lovers, unrequited flames. While the subjects changed, that feeling always remained. Perhaps, then, I have not been so infatuated with the people themselves, but with the act of longing.

Melissa Broder, Life without Longing

[complicatedconstellation-blog]

[romanceyour-ego]

“Perhaps the most painful truth is that you can’t love someone into loving you.”

[astupidweeb69]

Unrequited (Yandere! Ticci Toby x Reader) Part 9

Links to Previous Chapters: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8

Author’s Note: I've been rereading this chapter for about a week trying to edit it, but decided I'd just go ahead and post it. Happy holidays everybody!

Cross-posted on my Ao3 account, which I update more frequently.

Warnings: Swearing. Descriptions of Gore. Some threats of violence. (2,070 words)

____________________________________________________________

Leaves crunched underneath heavy boots, ragged and irritated breaths came out in clouds against the cold. 

Toby was not pleased.

Not pleased with how things were going with you.

And not pleased with being texted by Tim.

Apparently there was some work to do and he had to ‘get his lazy ass over there’. The young proxy didn’t even know the details of what needed to be done. A supply run? Some more random campers in the area? Either way Toby was itching for a fight. 

He could feel anger in his system bubbling and ready to boil over. Just imagining Tim’s smug face waiting for him, probably ready to spat some nonsense about how ‘he’s late’ or make a snide comment on his appearance. His face twitched furiously at the idea, and if anyone was unfortunate enough to see the way he walked through the woods now, they’d surely run in the other direction. There was murder in the man’s eyes. 

It wouldn’t take long for Toby to find his teammate. That’s how things always worked though, they had a connection to find each other when they were supposed to, all he needed to do was walk mindlessly in a direction and let the forest guide him.

“Someone’s in a pissy mood.”

The smell of smoke let him know he found who he was looking for. Tim leaned on a tree, a wry smile on his face, a lit cigarette burning away at his fingertips. It was practically an extension of his hand at this point, the fucking chainsmoker. Toby learned to hate the scent of tobacco.

“Where’s Brian?” Toby frowned, ignoring Tim’s comment.

“Had something he needed to do.”

Tim looked disinterested in the conversation. Getting him to actually tell Toby what was going on was like pulling teeth. And Toby knew first hand how hard that could be.

“Suh-so? Why’d you cuh-call me out here?” The younger proxy fidgeted with the ends of his gloves.

Tim sighed, letting the last part of his cigarette drop to the ground, putting it out with his boot. “There’s been some weird things happening out here. Brian said you should come with me to investigate.” 

Toby made note of how he said ‘Hoodie’. Tim’s way of hinting that he didn’t want him there. Typical.

“Wuh-what do you mean weird things?”

Tim motioned with his head for him to follow, walking away into some bushes, Toby raised one of his eyebrows before complying. There was a rancid stench in the air when he started following him, like something died. Not uncommon in the forest, but it was hard to stomach even for the most experienced woodsman. 

They followed the smell of rotting flesh, down a small embankment. The dead leaves on the ground made it hard not to slip and fall, and Toby snickered when Tim lost his footing a couple times, making the older proxy shoot him a dirty look. 

“There up ahead.” After walking a few paces, Tim pointed to a mangled pile of fur splayed out against a group of pine trees. 

Toby’s eyes narrowed at the bloody mess in front of him, turning to the other man in irritation. 

“You dragged me out here for a duh-dead deer?”

“Take a closer look, Rogers.”

Toby shoved past Tim, making a point to bump into his shoulder for using the nickname he hated. He pulled up the mouthguard hanging from his neck to cover his nose, but it didn’t block out the smell nearly as much as he’d hoped. It took a lot of willpower not to gag.

He scanned over the remains noting different sized bite marks and scratches that tore through the animal's belly, viscera pooling out and its black lifeless eyes staring up at the sky. A swarm of maggots had already started the process of decay. 

Toby could see the red of Tim’s flannel out the corner of his eye.

“Well?”

“Okay, it’s a luh-little strange. I’ll give you that. The bite muh-marks look like they came from a  human.”

“Anything else, detective?” Tim mused, clearly noticing something else but liked toying with the kid.

“Just fucking spit it out.”

The older man kneeled down, motioning to two different spots on the deer's hind legs. “They’re all different sizes, meaning more than one person did this.”

“Cuh-cool.” Toby deadpanned. “So what does that mean for us?” 

“It means we need to keep an eye out for groups of ravin’ lunatics.”

“Don’t we already duh-do that?”

Tim rolled his eyes. “You know what I mean. This is the second animal we’ve found like this in a week.”

“And yuh-you only thought to tell me now?”

“I was busy.” Tim shrugged, the corner of his lip curling up slightly. The man did not give two shits about warning Toby sooner. Probably didn’t even want to tell him now. If anything, Brian most likely had to convince him to.

The younger proxy scowled at him, tempted to escalate things, to cause another one of their fights ending with the two trying to claw the others' eyes out. Not that it would hurt him, and Toby always got some sick amusement seeing Tim in pain. But it would be dark soon, and he was itching to get back home. The thought of you back there tied up on his bed was making him scratch at his scar. 

He needed to spend more time with you. The look in your eyes as he paced around the cabin…. The look of fear and hatred. It wasn’t unexpected, but it still bugged him. You were… a bit more of a firecracker than he’d hoped. And level-headed unfortunately. You were catching on a little too quickly, to just how…. Temperamental he could be. The memory of you staring at his hatchets came back to him. He needed you to see his softer side, needed you to warm up to him before the truth, the real truth, about what he was came out. Maybe if he stole an old TV and got some of those movies you liked….

“Rogers!”

A finger snapped inches from his face. Toby blinked.

“Wuh-What?” 

“I told you we need to get goin’” Tim pushed Toby forward impatiently. “It’s almost night time. Come on.”

He could hear Tim muttering “Fuckin’ useless kid.” under his breath as he led the way.

Toby’s stomach twisted. That phrase got to him. Was something he’d heard a lot, from somewhere before, something in his past. Something familiar. Tim taunted him in ways that sparked a deep resentment, like an itch he could never fully scratch. A scab that wouldn’t heal.

They walked back the way they came in, up the hill and through the thick bushes, without saying a word. One thing they could agree on was the less they talked, the better.

Luckily Toby’s cabin wasn’t too far. Fiddling with the ends of his jacket, combing his hair, absentmindedly, he was glad to be rid of the old fucker finally and get back to what was important.

But things never worked out the way he wanted.

Toby felt a hand on his arm. Tim lit up another cigarette, his eyes narrowed at Toby, before taking a long, deep, drag into his lungs. .

Smoke billowed from the man’s mouth, surrounding him in a thick cloud as he spoke.

“Before you go, I need somethin’ from your cabin.”

Fuck.

Toby stared at him for a moment. His mind went blank, before finally speaking up.

“Wuh-what do you need?” 

He’d just act normal. It wouldn’t be a big deal. He could figure something out.

“Hoods and I are running low on some supplies. We know Kate keeps some of her stuff in your basement. Figured we’d borrow some things.” 

The boy twitched and fidgeted under the pressure, trying to come up with ways to get out of it. If Tim saw you… Toby didn’t even want to think about what he’d do. He honestly didn’t know.

“What… kuh-kind of things-sss?” Shit. His stutter was getting worse.

Tim raised a brow. Likely annoyed by how standoffish the other proxy was being at something simple.

“Like food n’ ammo. We’ve been too busy to go into town.” Tim paused, and looked almost accusingly at him. “And I know you’ve been leaving the forest a lot recently.”

Toby chewed on the side of his cheek. Of course the other proxies sensed his disappearance. He’d been too preoccupied with you to even think about that being a possibility. That didn’t mean they cared when he was gone, they weren’t his babysitter. But now Tim had him over a barrel. There was no way he could deny him supplies now, without admitting the reason he went into town was for… something out of the ordinary.

“Fuh-fine.” He sighed, trying to collect his thoughts. “Just duh-don’t touch any of my stuff.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

______________________________________________________________

The cabin was just up ahead. Toby kept glancing back at Tim who seemed too preoccupied in his own thoughts to notice.

“Whuh-wait outside for a second. There’s suh-something I need to take care of first.” 

Tim eyed him carefully. They both stood on the porch, tension rising, Tim’s body stiffening and his hands balling into fists for a brief moment. Toby fully expecting him to lash out. 

Tim always thought the boy was weird. Fucked up in the head. Overly-emotional, unstable, obnoxious, and he’s seen the worst of Toby’s manic episodes. He was almost certain the kid engaged in some light cannibalism, from the way he mumbled to himself in his delusional states. He was so fucking glad they didn’t live under the same roof anymore.

Finally, after a few moments of staring the other down, Tim relaxed. “Whatever, just don’t take too long.”  The older man decided he’d do whatever it took to get the fuck outta there, even if that meant having to obey. Despite how much that bruised his ego, he just wanted to go home and sleep.

Toby quickly went inside, slamming the door behind him, and Tim sat on the steps of the porch with a reluctant grunt.

Twitching anxiously, he ran into the room where you were tied to the bed. You jumped, obviously startled, by the door aggressively being opened. Normally he’d mock you, wanting to give a fake ‘awwww’ at how freaked out you were by his presence. He was still mad about how you've been treating him. But he didn’t have the time for that right now.

He opened the drawer to his nightstand, getting out an old t-shirt.

“Wha-” You started to question, but he cut you off by shoving the cloth in your mouth painfully. He tied it around your head, a little too tight, but he needed to make sure you were properly gagged and wouldn’t be heard.

Toby leaned down to your ear, speaking in a low hiss. “You nuh-need to be fucking quiet. I have a guest. He’s dangerous, so don’t get any ideas. No one’s coming to save you.”

He gripped your jawline tightly. “Do you uh-understand?” You stared back at him. Toby narrowed his eyes, tightening his hold on your face even more, until you finally nodded your head.

He released his hand and exited the room, mentally preparing himself to interact with Tim again, and with a deep breath, opened the front door.

“Okay, you can cuh-come in now.”

Tim groaned as he got up to follow him inside. 

Toby couldn’t help letting his eyes dart to his bedroom door when they walked past. He led Tim down the hall where the basement stairs were, which he started keeping locked the day he captured you. He didn’t need you to see what was down there. Hopefully not ever.

After Toby unlocked the door and showed him the various backpacks stolen from victims, Tim rummaged through a couple before collecting the items he needed. Mostly food, a couple old boxes of ammo. Nothing special.

His heart was pounding when they climbed the stairs again, so close to getting this over with. Wanting nothing more than to have him out of the house. Away from you.

But without warning, Tim stopped in the hallway, 

It was so sudden Toby almost bumped into his back.

“Whuh-what is it?”

There was a dangerously long pause, before Tim’s head turned to look behind his shoulder. Toby's eyes widened in fear.

“Did you hear that?”

[elle-rph]

*Develops feelings for someone* I've made a huge mistake.

[halcyondaaze]

| after image

Alice Munro, Collected Stories, “Tell me Yes or No,” // Mississippi Masala (1991) // Sylvia Plath, Poppies in July // Borghese gallery statues, Rome

[bettertwin1]

Why do ‘neopronouns’ make sense to you? Its weird. There are girls and boys. That should be it. Then all of sudden, people started identifying as fucking lampshades. If someone told me they identify as a star, I would not take them seriously. I would instead take them to a mental hospital.

-paragraph anon

Take me to dinner instead, also, AGAIN, this isn't all of a sudden, neopronouns have existed for a LONG TIME... and this is the most transgender fandom you'll ever be in, how old are you? Not asking to be rude, just out of genuine curiosity.

"There are boys and girls. That should be it." LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER

Gender identity is a social construct and subject to change over time, if someone told me they identified as a cheeto i'd say HELL YEAH and go abt my day cause idc how someone else identifies as long as they are happy and whimsical.

Is ur main problem with me that I use star/starself pronouns? Do u hate trans ppl? Do you want to kiss me? Are you in love with me?

[mashmoshmoosh]

They mean the world to me

[straylightdream]

unrequited hearts

𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭: seo changbin x f.reader & hwang hyunjin x f.reader

friends to lovers, unrequited love

↳ unrequited love is a bitch. Watching your best friend fall in love and get married is heartbreaking, but at least you have someone by your side.

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 3.7k

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: angst, heartbreak, smut warning below the cut.

𝐚𝐧: I wrote this with reader being a plus size/chubby. I decided to reworked one of my old stories on here that I wrote back in 2021. This one definitely hit close to home when I wrote it.

𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐬.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: oral (fem receiving), unprotected intercourse, creampie, sex against a wall.

The undying love you had for your best friend was love you couldn’t explain. He was your sun and your moon and your true meaning for existing. The problem is he didn’t return your feelings. Unrequited love is a bitch.

Hwang Hyunjin is your best friend and the love of your life. He never really knew how you felt though.

When you first met the quiet and serious man you thought he hated you. He barely ever spoke to you and was left questioning if you did something to piss him off. It didn’t take long for him to let his walls down around you and you quickly learned what a kind and sweet person he is. You think the second time you ever spoke to him was when you started to fall in love with him. After seven years of knowing him, people constantly questioned if you were a couple. Once they discover you aren’t they would always ask when it’s going to happen. You always attempted to brush off this statement and would say you’re just friends. Completely lying to whoever asked and lying to yourself in the process. Hyunjin’s response was always different from yours. He would tell them, “it’s not the right time.” You always tried to tell yourself that this statement was a joke. That you’ve talked about how people think you’re a couple often, but he thinks you’re too good of friends. This might have something to do with the fact you aren’t exactly his type. Any girl Hyunjin has ever dated has been beautiful skinny girls, where you’re pretty average and with a soft and curvy body. It could also be that he cares about your friendship too much to risk it.

For as long as you can remember you’ve hidden away your feelings for him. You’ve never told a soul you’re madly in love with your best friend.

Two years ago you made the stupid mistake of agreeing to move in with him. He asked after a long day at work. You were sitting at a ramen place waiting for your food when he asked you to be his roommate. Every part of your body was screaming at you to say no, every part of your body except your heart that couldn’t seem to push away your feelings you shared for him. Like a complete fool you agreed to be roommates.

Living with Hyunjin brought some of the best moments in your life and some of the most heartbreaking. Sitting on your comfy blue living room couch he told you about a girl he met at work. You tried to brush it off thinking it was nothing. One week later Hyunjin was leaving the apartment for his date with the girl. Two weeks later you’re sitting on the couch reading when the front door opens and Hyunjin walks into holding hands with a girl who keeps giggling that can’t seem to keep her hands to herself. The sinking feeling in your chest you get at the sight of together is a familiar feeling that will never seem to go away after that night.

It doesn’t take long before Hyunjin is dating Eun. At first you try your hardest to push away the thought of them together. It’s hard to ignore the fact that he’s in a happy relationship when she starts spending more time in your apartment. The more time she’s there the more time you spend away. You bury yourself in work trying to keep your mind off Hyunjin and your heartbreak. Your best friend is madly in love and completely clueless to the pain you’re experiencing. The more serious Hyunjin relationship grew with Eun the closer you got with your coworker Changbin.

Seo Changbin was the only person who knew your true feelings for Hyunjin. He figured out you were in love with him when he found you crying staring at the engagement photo Eun had posted. Seeing their engagement photo broke your heart for many reasons. One being it was clear that Hyunjin was never going to love you back, and two was the fact you were blind sided by their engagement. Hyunjin never mentioned he planned on proposing. It hurt like hell that he didn’t warn you. It didn’t feel right that you found out through Eun's post.

Tears brimmed your glossy eyes as you took off practically running from your desk. Locking yourself in the bathroom stall you cried over your lost love. You cried realizing Hyunjin would never love you like you love him. You started sobbing and you couldn’t help it. Lost in a sea of emotions you didn’t even hear someone knocking on the door outside.

Your eyes pop open at the sound of Changbin’s voice right outside your bathroom stall.

“Are you okay?” He sounds concerned.

“Yeah I’m fine,” reaching up to push away your tears trying to stop crying.

“Did you want to talk about it? Because you don’t sound fine,” he knows you too well to know that you’re not okay. The moment you open the bathroom stall door he’ll be the first to see past the fake smile you attempt to put on.

“No.”

Changbin clearly doesn’t like that response because it takes him all forty seconds to learn how to open the bathroom stall. He stands there watching you cry for a short moment before he reaches down taking your hand. He walks you to the counter where the sinks are and tells you to sit on the edge. Sitting there with your legs dangling he gets a paper towel and wipes away your tears with cool water. His eyes are filled with sadness as he takes care of you.

“What happened?” He asks, finally breaking the silence that’s formed between you.

“Hyunjin is now engaged,” you don’t bother lying. There isn’t a point in making up some lame excuse to why you’re crying in the bathroom at work.

“Oh.”

“He didn’t tell me he was going to propose. I found out because Eun posted a photo,” closing your eyes you can still see the stupid photo in your head. You absolutely hated how pretty she looked, clinging to Hyunjin with one hand while she held out her hand with the engagement ring on it towards the camera.

“That’s kind of a dick move, that he didn't talk to you about it.” It’s reassuring to know that Changbin agreed Hyunjin should have told you.

“What do I even say to him when I get home?” you ask as he continues to sweep away the tears from your cheek.

“Congrats I had no clue you were planning that.”

“I hate that I started crying at work because of this stupid photo,” a heavy sigh passes your lips as a wave of embarrassment washes over you.

“Is it safe to say you’re in love with your best friend?” he asks, staring right at you. You wanted desperately to lie to him, to tell him he’s absolutely crazy for even thinking that. The problem is you can’t lie to him. You don’t want to keep you feeling buried away from everyone. You want someone to know the pain you’re feeling. It’s hard to put on a fake smile and act like you aren’t in love.

“Yes.”

From that moment on you and Changbin only got closer. You spent many nights in his apartment attempting to stay away from Hyunjin and Eun as they planned their wedding. He came over to your place after you congratulated Hyunjin on his engagement. You put on a fake smile and fought back tears, but luckily your best friend was none the wiser.

Changbin held you and rubbed your back when you stared at the wedding invitation Eun had personally handed to you.

You weren’t sure how you were supposed to sit in a church and watch the man you considered to be the love of your life marry someone else.

The moment he saw the invitation he asked if he could go with you. Telling you that you needed a friend with you. On a warm Saturday after noon in the middle of June you sat in a church in the second row with Changbin by your side. You’re dressed in a spaghetti strap blush colored dress with a pair of small heels on. He’s wearing a dress shirt with a pair of dress pants. His hand is laced with yours as he’s sat right next to you leaving no space between you. Your eyes stayed locked on Hyunjin who was standing in front of the crowd. The moment Hyunjin's dark eyes lock on his soon to be wife walking down the aisle your heart stings. Blinking back tears, you watch them exchange vows.

A tear streams down your face as Hyunjin says “I do”, and just like that your fantasy inside your head is finally over.

Standing in the middle of the dance floor with arms around Changbin's neck you try to focus on just him. Swaying to the beat of a slow song. You originally told him you didn’t want to dance but he practically begged you. His hands are wrapped around you resting just above your butt. You can’t feel his eyes burning a hole in you.

“YN?” he catches your attention. Looking up you find him staring at you. “You look really beautiful,” his sweet words cause you to blush.

“Thank you, you look really handsome.”

“Come back to my place tonight, please,” his statement catches you off guard.

“Changbin,” you aren’t sure what you plan on saying.

“You don’t need to be in the place you share with him,” nobody seems to understand you quite like Changbin does these days.

“I’ll be okay,” it’s a lie you won’t be okay. If you go back to your apartment you share with your best friend you’ll do nothing but cry yourself to sleep.

“Please,” he pleads.

“Changbin why?”

“Because I don’t want you to be sad anymore. Especially over a guy who was too blind to see what was right in front of him,” he stops swaying to the beat of the song and stares at you. His arms still wrapped around you holding you close.

“Bin,” his statement feels like a weight being put on your chest. You aren’t sure if you’re reading too much into it but it sounds like more than just a friend concerned for you.

“Can I cut in?” You look up to see Hyunjin standing there.

Changbin looks at your best friend and opens his mouth before quickly shutting it. You assume he’s biting back telling him no.

“It’s up to her,” Changbin finally speaks.

You want to say no, but you need to do this. You tell Changbin you’ll find him after the next song. That you need to talk.

Placing your hands on Hyunjin’s shoulders he rests his hand on your side and looks at you smiling. There is a sudden awkward tension between you. You can’t even look him in the eyes. Your eyes bounce around avoiding his gaze.

“So you and Changbin seem cozy,” you aren’t sure if he’s bringing up Changbin just to make small talk.

“Yeah he’s a really good guy,” you sigh.

Another slow song starts to play and Hyunjin clears his throat. Looking up at him you see he’s no longer smiling.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was going to propose,” he sighs. Knitting your eyebrows together you’re confused on why he’s apologizing for this a year later. “I thought if I talked to you about it I would talk myself out of asking her.” You don’t understand his statement. Why on earth does he think you would try to change his mind? Even if you didn’t want him to marry her you would have never told him that. You truly cared about his happiness more than your own.

“YN you know you’re my best friend right?”

You nod silently. “Okay I love you so much,” he lets out a heavy sigh. You can’t tell if he means he loves you as a friend or if he loves you differently. All you know is his statement leaves your stomach twisting in knots.

“I love you too,” you say this knowing that you’re always going to love him. Even if he shattered your heart into a million pieces without meaning to.

Looking off to the side you see Changbin standing on the edge of the dance floor watching you. His normal happy go lucky smile is nowhere to be seen on his face. At this moment you would much rather be with Changbin than here with Hyunjin.

“I’m assuming you want to go talk to him. Something tells me I interrupted an important conversation with him,” Hyunjin says, removing his hands from you.

“I think it was an important one, but I might have messed it up.”

He reaches out brushing his thumb across your cheek for a quick moment before saying, “don’t let something good slip away from you. I’ve made that mistake so do me a favor and don’t do the same.”

Your heart drops as you stare at your best friend, “why did you let it slip away?”

“Because I was dumb and selfish. So do me a favor and don’t do what I did.”

Your head spins stepping away from him. You need to leave immediately, just being in the room with Hyunjin is too much. Walking quickly over to Changbin you grab his hand and tug him out of the room. Walking outside the warm summer air hits you and you take a deep breath.

“Did you still want me to stay with you tonight?” You look over at him.

“Yeah.”

Sitting on Changbin’s couch you’re still both dressed in your outfits from the wedding, except you’ve taken off your heels and Changbin has undone a couple of buttons and rolled up his sleeves. You’re watching a random game show barely paying attention.

“Do you plan on still living with him?” Changbin asks out of nowhere.

Looking over at him you find him staring at you. You haven’t thought that far in advance. You don’t really have anywhere else to go so living with Hyunjin is really your only option. You’ll just have to push back your feelings and live with the happy couple.

“I don’t know.”

“Please move in with me, at least until you find something else. Or you can just permanently live here. I have a guest room that you can have.”

You don’t understand why Changbin sounds so desperate for you to move in with him. You knit your eyebrows together processing everything he has just said.

“Why?”

“If I say something I need you to not get up and just walk away. I need you to listen,” he turns so he’s completely facing you on the couch.

“Okay.”

“YN I like you a lot, and not just as a friend. To be extremely honest the thought of you having to live with the man that broke your heart makes me sick. I’m asking you to move in so you can live with someone who’s not completely blind to what’s right in front of them,” he pauses and stares at you trying to judge your reaction to his confession. “If you don’t like me back it’s completely fine, but I still want you to move in. I personally think you need space from Hyunjin.” Everything he says makes you feel like your head is swimming. You feel completely lost, you couldn’t lie you had a crush on Changbin. You’ve had one for a long time. You’ve just been consumed by your love for Hyunjin. It’s left you unaware of the people around you.

“I’ll move in,” you say without really even thinking about it.

A smile spreads across his face, “we can talk about our feelings after a while. I know Hyunjin getting married is a lot to process. I don’t want you to think I’m taking advantage of you being emotional.”

After that night you moved in with Changbin. Him and his friend Minho helped you pack up your stuff from the apartment. All of your stuff was gone before Hyunjin and Eun even returned from their honeymoon. The day before they came home you shot Hyunjin a text telling him you moved out. Your text said, “I’m sorry you’re finding out this way but I have decided it’s probably best for both of us that I move out. I want you to have a good chance and make your marriage work and I think we both know if I live there it’s going to put a strain on your marriage and our friendship. Don’t worry we’re still friends, love YN.”

Two minutes later you received a text from him, “you didn't have to move out. We could have made this work. I appreciate you caring about my marriage, but I want you to know I’m going to miss you. Love Hyunjin.”

You couldn’t respond to that message. You just closed your phone and put it away pushing away the feeling that we’re creeping up.

Two months into living with Changbin is when your feelings for Hyunjin started to fade and your feelings towards your roommate grew more and more each day. Your days were made when you would hear Changbin laugh over the dumbest things. You lived for the little touches you would get here and there. Changbin was starting to fill a hole in your heart caused by Hyunjin. Late nights sitting on the couch watching movies were your favorite. The first few you both sat on different sides of the couch, but now two months in you lay between Changbin legs with your eyes glued to the TV.

Three and half months in is when you've finally confessed to Changbin you’re falling for him. He only responded with a huge smile across his face as he said a simple, “finally.”

Four months in you’re officially a couple and you sleep in his room every night. You’re now to the point where you don’t think of Hyunjin everyday. Your mind only seems focused on the man who kisses you good morning even before you’ve brushed your teeth.

Eight months in is when you received a phone call from Hyunjin telling you that Eun is pregnant, Hyunjin says he wanted to tell you first. Before you can even process if you have any emotions, Changbin has you pressed up against the wall, as his lips nipped their way down your neck. Hungry hands roamed your skin under your sweater. Your mind feels as if it’s in haze as he whispers dirty things to you.

Your mind and heart don’t even seem to care that Hyunjin is going to be a father. You only actually care about the man who dropped down to his knees in front of you pulling your underwear down your thick thighs. Lifting your leg onto his shoulder he licks up your slit. Your head is thrown back as he pumps two fingers in and out of you. After sleeping together twice Changbin made it his mission to learn all the things that turned you on. Your fingers tangle in his hair gently tugging and earning a moan from him as he sucks in your clit while his fingers continue pumping into you. You come moaning his name loudly. Sitting back in his hunches he wipes his mouth, smirking.

“Are you done?” You ask, egging him on.

“Oh god, not even close,” moments later his pants are pushed down just enough to free his straining erection. He wasted no time wrapping one of your legs around his waist as he thrust into you quickly.

With his lips against your ear he whispers, “I love you.”

You don’t even have to think about it as you moan back, “I love you too.”

You’ll always care about Hyunjin. It’s impossible not to, but Seo Changbin is the one who owns your heart now. He appreciates you more than anyone ever has. He goes out of his way to let you know he loves you.

“Are you mine, baby girl?” he groans, snapping his hips into yours.

“Only your,” you whine wrapping your arms around his neck.

He continues to have you pressed up against the wall with one hand tightly gripping your thigh. His lips are nipping at your neck, slowly moving down to the junction where your neck and shoulder meet. He sucks on your skin with the intention of leaving a mark. One of your hand tangles in his hair again tugging once more to receive a hungry groan. The other hand claws at his shoulder.

You come screaming his name as a hot wave of pleasure rushes over you. He nips at your skin with a muffled moan of your name as he finishes inside you. Slowly pulling out he leans forward and presses a soft kiss to your lips.

“I love you,” he whispers.

“I love you too.”

Leaning against the wall with legs feeling like jello, he rushes off to the bathroom and comes back with a warm wash cloths to wipe away the mess he’s made between your legs.

You spend the rest of the evening curled up in bed with your boyfriend neither of you bother to get dressed. There’s no place you would rather be than in the arms of a man who fixed your broken heart.

Regarding taglist:

If you aren’t interacting with my writing outside of liking the new post I’m gonna have to remove your name from the taglist. You will also be removed if I try to tag you and your blog is listed as "invisible". If you've changed your URL and didn't let me know I will also be removing your name. I’m sorry for the inconvenience but my interactions outside or likes feels like it’s nonexistent right now. All of my taglist are still open though. If you request to be added to one via this form, I kindly ask for interactions in the form and feedback and reblogs. To be quite honest, those really encourage my writing.