#UR RIGHT THO THEY LITERALLY DO
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IM CRYING WHY DO THEY KEEP POSING LIKE THEYVE BEEN IN LOVE SINCE MIDDLE SCHOOL
me n who honestly
us af :3
#UR RIGHT THO THEY LITERALLY DO#theyre so silly 😭😭#i love those creatures#dom and alberto <33#shadowhunters#tsc#alberto rosende#dominic sherwood#simon lewis#jace herondale#ask
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vws 🤞🤞
#trigun#vash the stampede#nicholas d. wolfwood#vashwood#tristamp#huzzah#they make me so physically ill#i literally raised myself from the dead#to draw these idiots.#also i love 98 ww sm i hope yall can tell that the second photo is 98 ww#also like. i think the modern au i be drawing at the top#would basically be the baseball au#nicholas doomed by the narrative wolfwood#also spaghetti cameo from 98 spaghetti date#plus (guys pls tell me i did this right)#that oke time both vash and ww almost doed in the desert bc of dehydration#yall drink ur water#also the only reason theyre not kissing is bc ive never drawn ppl kissing and#idk how it do it 💔💔💔#in my head i am psychically making ghem kiss tho
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Went out to check in w/place we interviewed at. Had a breakdown in the fucking place. Person we needed to see wasn't there. Ended up feeling like a complete fool by the end of it. Had another breakdown heading home. Gonna try again at 9.
#sepiasys.txt#Ideally alone#Because yeah I'm FUCKING RIGHT. We can't do anything with bestie present. We can't mask! BECAUSE HE IS THERE!!#If I sense any chance of him looking at us; I can't keep the anxiety down enough.#Also confirmed we just get cold and shakey as fuck when we're secretly anxious. Apparently.#I get that buying smth would make it less awkward but thats if he comes with. If not even if I have deal with a line of ppl idc#aint buying shit ESPECIALLY if it turns out we weren't fit for the job because why the fuck would I do that?#I might try to get something online if need be idgaf {says someone who wont feel the same later}#It's just people. just people.#I think the most disheartening thing is hearing some dude say it was their first day here; idk what the context was for it#if thats a new hire tho then WHAT THE FUCK MAN!! DONT JUST FUCKING GHOST ME LIKE THIS SHIT!!!!!#I feel sick >:( Our roommates are gonna fucking hate me.#Also the way bestie acts; in retrospect it looks like he's trying to ignore me actively. But he also pushes me to lead. BITCH⁉️#YOU'RE NOT THAT KIND OF PERSON WHO NEEDS A FRIEND TO LEAD OR WHATEVER LIKE FUCK OFF WITH THAT‼️ I know ur tryna help but DUDE.#You literally make everything worse when you treat me like this because I can feel the expectations weigh on me. Because you have them.#It's like you're secretly watching and listening even if you're doing everything you can to NOT do it for my sake.
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GRAPPLING WITH CRIPPLING INSOMNIA QUICK POST BATMAN FANFIC
(Reverse Robins, with Tim as the red hood)
“You kill,” Cass hisses. “Like him.”
“I’m not doing anything that they haven’t done to someone else.” Hood’s voice is hard, unrepentant.
She strides forward to jab him in the chest. “Is that supposed to make it okay? Am I supposed to forgive you?” She sounds almost heartbroken. “You remember Batman. Is this better?”
Jason doesn’t know what she means, but Hood clearly does. His lips thin. “You can’t seriously be comparing this to that. He killed me.”
“Two wrongs do not make a right.”
“I don’t care about being right. I don’t expect you to understand.”
“You used to be so sweet, big brother.” She reaches up to touch his face, and Jason watches him lean into it before he realizes what he’s doing and wrenches away from her.
“Yeah, well, things change. People change.”
“Not that much.” It’s sad, quiet. “You know I can’t forgive this.”
“I really don’t care.”
“You do.”
He doesn’t dignify that with a response, instead turning away to make his escape. She starts to follow but instead is tackled by three bodies, and has to turn to fight them. Jason tries to help, but she’s pretty much got it on her own. When it’s clear they’re losing the assassins fall back, and Jason tries to chase them, but Cass snags him by the cape and holds him back. When they turn around the Red Hood is long gone.
Cass has her fists clenched, and her shoulders are shaking. Jason doesn’t know whether it’s anger or sadness, but he steps forward to offer her comfort.
She steps away and shakes her head.
He’s always known Tim and Cass were close, but it was a distant thought to him, something he never thought he’d witness. Seeing the two of them in person was like looking through a funhouse mirror, warped and twisted until all that was left was a huge, grinning shadow.
There’s laughter in his nightmares that night.
#batfam fanfic#reverse robins#tim drake#cassandra cain#im not gonna tag jason bc I feel like even tho it’s in his pov he’s barely in this snippet#wait that’s stupid#jason todd#cass ily 5ever never let them tell u they’re wrong#for the record the three assassins are pru z and owens#idk I like the idea of Tim and cass being close before he died and then her having to grapple with the fact that he’s murdering people now#do I get her voice right? who knows I am literally surviving off of spite weed and a prayer rn#i haven’t had a weeks worth of solid sleep in like. months. bc im hyperfixating too hard#sometimes tim drake worms his way into ur head when you’re 15 and then when you’re 21 you remember he exists and suddenly#BOOM. adhd attack#anyways#oh yeah the Batman part is supposed to refer to titans of tomorrow gun batman#*never let them tell you you’re wrong not they’re wrong. tim is v much in the wrong
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The shower curse is how crumb keeps it's power. Something something god's hardest battles to it's toughest soldiers.
i am not her toughest soldier tho i am in fact her weakest clown
#muse talk#anon#ITS LITERALLY BEEN GOING ON FOR YEARS#i do think he’s gaining power from it tho ur very much right
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i dont wanna say who tho i imagine its easy to guess just bc i would feel kinda bad but when i was at someone’s table yesterday the chick who was there like helping run it was talking abt how she had overheard a bunch of like grown ass, old enough to be his mother women making really blatantly down bad comments abt him while they were in his line and man… mind you it was literally his first con AND his actual mom was there w him what the hell 😭
#like brother i am not quite 4 years older than him? i think????#im 23 next month and he is 19 rn idk his bday tho#and even i wouldnt be saying that shit right THERE in front of his entire table which included his MOTHER#there were literally (2) 15ish yr old girls behind me all giggly abt how they were like#gonna act nonchalant so hed like them#what kinda slasher 4 richie (iykyk) shit u gotta be on to be a grown woman openly fiending for a boy whos like#an age appropriate + very close in age crush to some random hs girls#i felt so bad tho like ppl need to stop being weird#between this and the dudes who were harassing mikey over deweys death at the last spookala#rat clenches fist of rage STOP harassing these ppl!!! ESP at their first ever con yall want them to NEVER COME BACK???#but he was so nice too and clearly so nervous 😭#do not make that sweet boy afraid to step foot in a convention center ever again#r yall thirsty ass facebook moms OUT OF UR MIND?#ceci speaks
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idk if any of yall remember this project i posted abt it a while ago but im building a monochrome minecraft city and this is the latest addition
#it is EXACTLY one block taller than both wtc (pre 2001)#I had to do it#because the irony of an arab building style being taller than the symbol of america and the west is so funny to me#i say arab style its literally just the ziggurat type structure and to some extent the shape of the arches#this is a heavily modified version of one painting i saw a while ago of the tower of babel#because i had really liked what happened to the stairs so i took that and made it my own#and tbh? this is one kf the best towers in the entire citt#it may not be the tallest but i love it#it takes up two whole blocks the road had to go through the base#i also pushed the limits of worldedit cus i wanted to raise everything above the first platform up because i hadnt built it right#which was allegedly 6000+ blocks#minecraft#city#ziggurat#its 61 by 61 blocks at the base too#wouldve done 64 by 64 but 2 block centers are my enemy#tho i did just realise theres no main leading ramp like in the ziggurat of ur that was supposed to be in the building plans#guess i forgot
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more intimidating peppino please. more butcher knife peppino!!! more heavy weight boxer arms peppino PLEASE. FATSTRONG SHOTPUT/HIGHLAND GAMES PEPPINO PLEASE!!! legs like tree trunks!!!
You
#answered#//#///#////#/////#peppino#YOURE RIGHT THO#i still havent drawn him like#more realistic; i still draw him stylized#but he is supposed to give off these vibes#im still debating if i want him to have equally muscular tree trunk legs to match his arms#but i think i like it mostly fat#VERY strong thick thighs that look soft#please also consider#i havent drawn it yet but I think hes a very good handyman#he does basically all the repairs around the shop#partially bc he literally couldnt afford to hire people to fix shit#but also bc keeping ur hands busy is a good thing#do what u will with this information#okay i am so fucking seepy gn yall 💖
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I think I may just have to accept that my mum had absolutely buckwild manic pixie dream girl game back in the day
#my posts#I feel so unhinged right now#apparently there is a man who has been holding a flame for my mother for like 40something years#this man has added me (who he has NEVER MET) to his WILL#for more inheritance than his actual flesh and blood son will get#babe what is u doing#my mum will not fuck u just bc my dad died#baby girl this move just seems very desperate#who am I to discourage my mums rich ex from having a midlife guilt complex and leaving us money I guess#but what the FUCK do his kids and real family think about this#like my guy you literally had ur chance and blew it#u left and married another woman without breaking up with her !! she is never gonna take u back!!#absolute best kind of family drama bc I have 0 stakes and no involvement#look if my guy wants to soothe his guilty conscience by throwing his money at us that’s fine I guess ???#my mum thinks it’s a big man move to throw money at ur problems tho lol
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I will be forever grateful i can be on this new med. it's one a lot of folks also need and can struggle to have access to! It's important i be on it, especially if i start doing any vid collabs
(some of which, really, all of which, i unfortunately actually need to cancel that were in the preplanning stages, bc the election results have me wanting to wait and see how the general atmosphere of the country is before i agree to meet up with anyone. I feel bad for cancelling, but also i just can't know for sure how safe things are/might be going forward and I'd rather avoid the potential of. ya know. various not great things that could happen at a meet up, tho i would certainly hope they wouldn't. i don't feel like actually addressing them rn, u guys know what i mean)
That said, if the truvada initial side effects could fuck off asap would be so lovely. three weeks at worst, then they should be gone/much better or so i am told. really hope that's true bc losing my mornings to being dizzy and nauseous is Not Working for me lmao. im on week two, and now understand why my new doc said to call if i needed any 'cheerleading' and support to get thru the side effects, bc apparently she's done that for several ppl to make sure they actually make it thru the three weeks and keep on it (lovely of her!!)
#text post#not going to get into the other painful smack of this morning#suffice to say that medicaid does not in fact fully cover vocal therapy/training for trans ppl#even if ur docs feel incredibly certain it is#if i was making a decent bit over minimum wage at consistent hours and already had my current debts paid off mostly#then I'd happily consider paying the chunk Medicaid won't cover but as of now#it would literally be basically two paychecks if not three to cover the estimate for this first visit#and that's only if the poll would have us polling every week like we did before the election#otherwise we're guesstimating it would be upwards of 4 paychecks to cover it#I'm actually gonna get into in here bc nobody reads all my tag essays (fair valid and correct)#im really sad abt this. my voice gets me clocked a lot and while i can mostly handle like. visually being clocked#my voice giving me away genuinely makes me feel a pain in my chest. i can't get my customer service voice to go lower yet#and even if it's my usual voice I've made minimal progress on my own self done vocal study stuff#so like. no one knows how high it was compared to how it is now tho so no one actually hears it as anything near deep#which it isn't but like. there's been a slightly barely there drop of it per at least a couple ppl in my life#i was probably going to be able to learn how to sing again and find my new range. I'd fix my customer service voice#even if it would only ever be a teeny bit lower than how it is now. it would be lovely#im not gonna get too down tho bc someday hopefully I'll be able to make it happen/afford it#and for now...im doing the bad thing of not cancelling the appt yet#i will bc they're booking out for months and it isn't right of me to take a spot i know i can't keep#but. let me pretend i can for another day or two. maybe until monday. then I'll call or msg them on mychart#and let them know i just don't have the funds rn tho i do deeply appreciate that Medicaid at least pays part of it#im just not at a point where i can cover the rest but that I'll reschedule/have a new referral sent whenever that changes#...and hopefully things in this country will be of such a state that such care is still available to ppl like me.#but that's all we're saying on that bc im already having a pathetic little cry over this#(im fine the med side effects have me crying over everything lol i see a sad commercial and Instant Tears like someone died lmaooo)
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wait do people really have joke emails
#I do not#my dad set up my email tho#I was like 8 at the time#Fun fact my sister and I used to email each other over her first phone and the family iPad bc we didn’t have iMessage or WhatsApp or anythi#anyways my email is literally just [my first name]@[my last name].com#another fun fact: theoretically my last name is spelled wrong bc it’s two separate words and my email doesn’t spell them separately#oh right some people here know my name. ur welcome to email me lol#It bothers me to see the red bubble so I check my emails multiple times daily
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there is nothing random dads like more than to stare me down so hard they physically turn their bodies to keep watching
#sir. sir look away#why are u doing this#there were literally 5!!!!!!! five ! that i can remember yesterday#dont u have smthn better 2 look at i am not that interesting i swear o(-< watch ur kids#i just want 2 shop.........#this was a different time but it reminds me of once there was a dude who rotated his body fully WHILE ON THE ESCALATOR#WHY ...........#im just a lil guy. .. .#i know im weird looking but it cannot b that bad... surely.. ..#i like 2 tell myself it's the green hair but theyve been doing that since i had black#im pretty sure they do this to everyone tho. right#it's just equally uncomfortable 4 us all
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Got a sticker yay pls fellow Americans pls for the love of god go out and vote
#pic#personal#nonfunctional rn but i will get my ass up and vote thats for sure#its awful tho more than half the positions only had rep candidates.. had to do write ins#honestly highkey scared esp bc ppl are talking abt some green party revolution that doesnt exist#like sorry id love to not vote for the centrist right dems either its awful but#unless u can convince every superdelegate to vote green on election night to even have a chance#like pls i hate kamala too but trump will take away our rights to even fight back#the govs been so useless these 4 yrs partially bc trump destabilized it so bad#like the Supreme court gave him presidential immunity that might take yrs to be resolved#it was just this year. him getting in office only seals the deal for everyone involved#ig part of it im seeing a lot of blk nondems are getting berated for voting blue and ppl are weaponizing the genocide#which cruel firstly. secondly trump is the scariest option hes ten toes down on israel.#why would u even chance wasting ur vote against the literal white supremacist he would only further the destruction substantially#like im sorry i just. i need to see a free palestine this is the best chance#unfortunately this country is sick to its core and biden is quite literally older than israels inception#so while its truly horrific its expected and the only thing we can do is mitigate it#and as someone who lives in ga. theres too many trump vance signs everywhere I just cant#going back to my depression hole good luck yall
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God, this is fucking crazy
So i only have 3 more classes to take, but it'll cost the same to take 3 classes as 4 classes. So I've been thinking about taking a 4th class just for the hell of it. Something fun and/or easy.
Out of curiosity, I looked up orchestras. I was in it in my first year, but I haven't consistently played since 2016. But I still dream about being in an orchestra again. I *miss it*. So I was like. Well, what if *that* was my 4th class next semester? What If?
I looked it up. This week is the last week they're doing auditions for it. There was only one more spot free after today. And that's *tomorrow evening*.
I haven't really played my violin much in YEARS. I'm so out of practice. But apparently they don't reject anyone outright. Auditions are just for placement. So worst case scenario, I get placed in an orchestra at a lower skill level than I was at my prime. It'd still be an orchestra.
It's crazy short notice, but I don't think I'd forgive myself if I passed it up. Bc I have just one more semester before I graduate. One last opportunity to be in a school orchestra. And if I didn't do this, I'd be left with that What If forever.
So. Crazy short notice, but I have a violin audition tomorrow!!! Hahahaha
#speculation nation#im literally shaking with nerves rn but i want this so so so badly#i remember. how to play. my arms are just so much stiffer than they used to be. and my nails. man im gonna have to trim my fucking nails#at least my left hand. kinda sucks bc i like the polish i have on rn but u cant have any long nail at all for violin.#i need to play two scales of my choosing. ascending and descending in three octaves.#recommended for violin is A C or E-flat major. of course i know A and C but i'd have to look up E-flat. never did much with flats in school#then again i have that One Two Three and a Half rhythm Down. thats how id often warm myself up.#start with the base G string and just do a scale up and down (one octave). go up to the next note. do it again.#again and again until i started running out of room on the E string. & if i was Real motivated maybe id start shifting to continue.#so all id need to do is find the E flat and id be good. it all follows the same pattern.#the harder challenge will be the solo or etude. 2-3 minutes in length. only *one day* to prepare.#i have NO IDEA what id even play. i'll look in my old sheet music to see if theres anything that might work#simple enough for me to relearn on such short notice. and interesting enough to be played solo#(since i was always in orchestras it's not always the best for solo playing. tho i was also first violin section a lot#which is Basically the same as playing solo lmaooo)#if i cant find anything i do have a few sheet music books i could look in. id hate to play smth too simple#but better simple and Right than trying to do something above my current skill level.#which IRKS ME bc once upon a time i was the 4th best violinist in my high school. out of nearly 2k students.#but thats what happens when u go years without consistent practice :p ur arm gets Stiff.#im. still nervous but also thinking about the music is making me EXCITED.#it's going to be a wild time prepping for this thing but itll be over in like 5 mins and i dont even have to worry about Passing#so long as i *do it* i should get into something. i just need to push myself. do it. get out there. *play your violin*#i already cried in a public bathroom for 10 mins today and im feeling emotional Again.#not quite crying emotional tho thankfully. just. i feel like i need to climb onto a rooftop and SCREAM!!!! but like in a good way.#so so so nervous but itll be so so so worth it. i could be in an orchestra again. finally. finally finally finally.#and i STILL NEED TO FINISH THIS ASSIGNMENT.....!!!! hfkahfks today has been. a DAY.#just. keeps going through my head. i could be in an orchestra again. i could be in an orchestra again. at least one more time.
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'stop updating us on ur random thoughts every night' no
#gideon shut the hell up challenge#sorry for 24/7 thinking abt fawn !!! (<- lying) anyway.#first thought is v3 post-robbery bringing cyrus to the hq to go see the rangers/chen and ric noticing fawn sporting some new injuries#(we default to a cut lip bc he is Touchy and I think that would explode their brain but any injury will do)#and he comments on how they didn't have those before and they're like oh haha uh yeah it. happens. u know how it is.#and also we like to think that he calls them bambi. smth that he has literally done since hero days. and they're immediately like 😳#bc their brothers are RIGHT THERE.... one of whom u DATED ricardo !!! (they do not Say this tho they just think it v intensely)#and c/r are ofc sharing a link w them and are suddenly like um okay well. it Wasn't weird until u fucking reacted like that ???#....... honestly what if they don't even reintroduce cyrus properly what if he just meets up w them at ranger hq and is suddenly There.#chen walking into the break room seeing r/f: god dammit. chen walking in and seeing that now there's also cyrus: God Dammit.#I just think. if they're siblings. they're Absolutely giving each other hell each time a crush gets realized considering their dating pool#they could be across the city from each other but the second u develop even a Partial crush the other two are Immediately Aware#and like okay yeah sure fawnric is funny bc ur brother's ex ?? Really ??? but hello ????? river/chen ???? CYRUS/DANNY ??????
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when drawing i spend a lot of time. like a LOT of time blurring my eyes because I used to be a huge perfectionist and doing that helped me picture what it might look like to someone who is not me (especially to someone just passing by or not super familiar with art in general) AND it does help a lot with that but I've also noticed sometimes I focus so hard on what my art looks like blurry and from afar that I forget. what it looks like normally. it's made me really pay attention to tonal distinction at least LOL
#like sometimes if a drawing doesnt pass the grayscale value test i'll be like hmmm...#(not even the real grayscale test like taking a pic and setting it to b&w. my weird fucked up ver instead where you put the drawing several#feet away and blur ur eyes. i guess people with glasses can do that by taking em off)#if the tones arent distinct when blurry and far away WHATS the point#which is a silly thing to worry about. sometimes a monotonal drawing is what you want to give a specific mood#literally tho sometimes i'll be like thinking huh this drawing was alright and then like a teacher will gush about my linework#and i'll be like what linework. unblurs my eyes. oh right it aint half bad#i do like doing linework tho. so im glad my linework seems to be liked! i should look at it more often#sorry im starting my final year of my fine arts degree. i have to do a hashtag undergraduate thesis#(TWO ACTUALLY im a double major because im insane) so ur gonna see me get all like#introspective about my art process again LOL hopefully i wont get as deflated as i did earlier this year this time!!
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