#Tyrion is just vibing

[escailyyy]

On today’s Episode of 'The Real Sansa and Tyrion', we get a look at the aftermath of the Red Wedding, aka, the Hollywood red tie event in which Dreamboat CEO Robb Stark, eloped with soap opera star Roslyn Frey (now referred to as wife #3) and resigned from his position in Winterfell Industries.

With Chairman Catelyn Stark and househusband Ned joining Robb and Roslyn in their honeymoon Cruise. Plus the rest of her family MIA. All the responsibility for the family business has been dumped on Sansa’s front porch. And our favourite celebrity Trophy Wife is not happy! Tune in for our next episode as the woes and annoyances of being the #QueenofTheNorth and being the #QueenofTheNorthHusband continue in Winterfell

An: how do you like the trs&t version of the red wedding debacle?

[lmaowh-at]

Lanns n Starks lineups/costumes sketches that I will probably add other houses to. Tywin and Joff & the rest aren't here because I was lazy and Cerseis dress took all of my energy. Don't ask me about inspiration or historical basis for these

[atopvisenyashill]

connections between naerys and sansa?

There’s plenty! She’s very much in a Naerys/Aegon scenario in ASOS & ACOK, where she has no ability to leave the capital, no one doing anything meaningful to protect her, and a King that is obsessed with sexually humiliating her. There’s a lot of romanticism and chivalry surrounding her character and how other people react to her character, the same as Naerys.

But also, Sansa makes the comparisons to Naerys herself, and she does it before she realizes what kind of person Joffrey is! In fact, it starts with her very first chapter where she compares Joffrey interrupting Ilyn Payne & Sandor Clegane to Aemon demanding a trial by combat against Ser Morgil:

A whole day with her prince! She gazed at Joffrey worshipfully. He was so gallant, she thought. The way he had rescued her from Ser Ilyn and the Hound, why, it was almost like the songs, like the time Serwyn of the Mirror Shield saved the Princess Daeryssa from the giants, or Prince Aemon the Dragonknight championing Queen Naerys's honor against evil Ser Morgil's slanders.

She will compare Joffrey to Aemon and herself to Naerys again later, to Ned:

"Father, I only just now remembered, I can't go away, I'm to marry Prince Joffrey." She tried to smile bravely for him. "I love him, Father, I truly truly do, I love him as much as Queen Naerys loved Prince Aemon the Dragonknight, as much as Jonquil loved Ser Florian. I want to be his queen and have his babies."

(lowkey she’s so fucking funny for that “i only just now remembered” comment, idk how ned kept a straight face for it)

She then uses Aemon (and the Cargyll twins) to make Tommen feel better and dunk on Joffrey:

Prince Tommen sobbed. "You mew like a suckling babe," his brother hissed at him. "Princes aren't supposed to cry." "Prince Aemon the Dragonknight cried the day Princess Naerys wed his brother Aegon," Sansa Stark said, "and the twins Ser Arryk and Ser Erryk died with tears on their cheeks after each had given the other a mortal wound." "Be quiet, or I'll have Ser Meryn give you a mortal wound," Joffrey told his betrothed.

Again, there’s a focus on Aemon’s romantic relationship with Naerys because that's what appeals to Sansa. But when people say "Sansa sees the world through stories" it's not just about how she romanticizes or idolizes knighthood, nobility, and chivalry - she thinks through information by comparing it with similar historical events or stories and analyzing it. She clearly sees the problem with Loras protecting Margaery from Joffrey by comparing him to the Toynes instead of Aemon, and Joffrey (once again) to Aegon the Unworthy:

She is so brave, Sansa thought, galloping after her . . . and yet, her doubts still gnawed at her. Ser Loras was a great knight, all agreed. But Joffrey had other Kingsguard, and gold cloaks and red cloaks besides, and when he was older he would command armies of his own. Aegon the Unworthy had never harmed Queen Naerys, perhaps for fear of their brother the Dragonknight . . . but when another of his Kingsguard fell in love with one of his mistresses, the king had taken both their heads. Ser Loras is a Tyrell, Sansa reminded herself. That other knight was only a Toyne. His brothers had no armies, no way to avenge him but with swords. Yet the more she thought about it all, the more she wondered. Joff might restrain himself for a few turns, perhaps as long as a year, but soon or late he will show his claws, and when he does . . . The realm might have a second Kingslayer, and there would be war inside the city, as the men of the lion and the men of the rose made the gutters run red.

She’s also not wrong in her assessment here because the Tyrells (my guess is Garlan and Olenna) are so worried about this outcome they just murder Joffrey and install Tommen; like Bethany Bracken, Margaery is groomed (with all the implications that are included in such a loaded term) to be sexually available to the King because her father wants power and doesn't care if his daughter is sexually abused to get it. Like Terrance Toyne, Loras is considered attractive, skilled, and has several brothers more than willing to start a war to avenge his death. I think it's incredibly intuitive that Sansa ultimately comes to the same conclusion as two seasoned political players like (presumably) Olenna and Garlan come to, and she makes this judgement call very quickly!

And Sansa also hits on a lot of (correct) similarities when she makes these comparisons between Joffrey's court and Aegon the Unworthy's court; Aegon and Joffrey both have wild, violent temperaments while being notoriously difficult to control. It’s not just Naerys that attempts to get Aegon to stop marital raping her; Aemon’s useless tears aside, Viserys does do the bare minimum here in sending Aegon away so Naerys can heal from her miscarriages, Daeron got shitty with the Brackens about being tacky over Naerys' marital rape and ill health, Baelor fasts himself to death over Naerys’ miscarriages, etc etc. All of the “authority figures” around Aegon think his behavior is wrong but Aegon proves stubbornly difficult to control or kill. Joffrey falls along these same lines - Cersei, Robert, Tyrion, Tywin, and even Varys all struggle to get some control over Joffrey but like Aegon, he knows once he’s of age and has that crown he doesn’t have to answer for SHIT and stubbornly resists every attempt to curb his behavior. Joffrey is a hell scenario waiting to happen because like Aegon, he’s petty and petulant enough to pull the stunts Aegon pulls like pitting his true born kids against his bastard born ones and causing another violent succession crisis. I say this as like, the ultimate Joffrey Apologist here, lmaooo, he has reasons for being a nasty piece of shit but the Tyrells are right to look at him and go “oh that’s trouble” because he is a ticking time bomb. And the crazy thing is, it’s not just Sansa who compares Joffrey to Aegon the Unworthy:

"A king can have other women. Whores. My father did. One of the Aegons did too. The third one, or the fourth. He had lots of whores and lots of bastards." As they whirled to the music, Joff gave her a moist kiss. "My uncle will bring you to my bed whenever I command it." Sansa shook her head. "He won't." "He will, or I'll have his head. That King Aegon, he had any woman he wanted, whether they were married or no."

Joffrey makes the comparison himself. He's a piece of work just like his hero and he is directly threatening to rape Sansa the same way Aegon raped Naerys and poor Bethany Bracken. He is directly admitting he is "unworthy" and practically daring all of KL to overthrow him for it because he thinks they'll blink before he does (and he is unfortunately deadly wrong in this assumption).

And when you extrapolate out from there, you can see other, similar patterns between Naerys' life and Sansa's, beyond the Joffrey-Aegon, Margaery-Bethany, Loras-Terrance, and Sansa-Naerys parallels. Tyrion himself aspires to be a sort of Viserys II type player (see: "It should have been called the Lives of Five Kings" rant he gives to Oberyn); a power behind the throne directing his crazy family to do what's right or smart or proper. There's an interesting echo in Viserys taking direct action in sending Aegon away from Naerys and Tyrion stopping Joffrey in his assault of Sansa - like Viserys, he can see the monster in the king he is raising, makes an attempt to stop it, but fails because he underestimates just how dangerous and erratic his little king has become. Like Viserys, Tyrion is suspected of poisoning his own nephew in an attempt to get closer to power and the throne (and Viserys, like Tyrion, is probably innocent - the sort of fasting that Baelor was doing regularly is hard on the body!).

I don't think any of this is coincidental or accidental either, because of that haunting scene where Joffrey destroys the gift Tyrion got him. Here's the scene, excuse the wall of text, but it's important:

He plays the gracious king today. Joffrey could be gallant when it suited him, Sansa knew, but it seemed to suit him less and less. Indeed, all his courtesy vanished at once when Tyrion presented him with their own gift: a huge old book called Lives of Four Kings, bound in leather and gorgeously illuminated. The king leafed through it with no interest. "And what is this, Uncle?" A book. Sansa wondered if Joffrey moved those fat wormy lips of his when he read. "Grand Maester Kaeth's history of the reigns of Daeron the Young Dragon, Baelor the Blessed, Aegon the Unworthy, and Daeron the Good," her small husband answered. "A book every king should read, Your Grace," said Ser Kevan. “My father had no time for books.” Joffrey shoved the tome across the table. “If you read less, Uncle Imp, perhaps Lady Sansa would have a baby in her belly by now.” He laughed … and when the king laughs, the court laughs with him. “Don’t be sad, Sansa, once I’ve gotten Queen Margaery with child I’ll visit your bedchamber and show my little uncle how it’s done.” Sansa reddened. She glanced nervously at Tyrion, afraid of what he might say. This could turn as nasty as the bedding had at their own feast. But for once the dwarf filled his mouth with wine instead of words... [Joffrey gets a Valyrian sword and figures out a name for it, Widow's Wail, it's a few pages, it's not relevant here] Joffrey brought Widow’s Wail down in a savage two-handed slice, onto the book that Tyrion had given him. The heavy leather cover parted at a stroke. “Sharp! I told you, I am no stranger to Valyrian steel.” It took him half a dozen further cuts to hack the thick tome apart, and the boy was breathless by the time he was done. Sansa could feel her husband struggling with his fury as Ser Osmund Kettleblack shouted, “I pray you never turn that wicked edge on me, sire.” “See that you never give me cause, ser.” Joffrey flicked a chunk of Lives of Four Kings off the table at swordpoint, then slid Widow’s Wail back into its scabbard. “Your Grace,” Ser Garlan Tyrell said. “Perhaps you did not know. In all of Westeros there were but four copies of that book illuminated in Kaeth’s own hand.” “Now there are three.” Joffrey undid his old swordbelt to don his new one. “You and Lady Sansa owe me a better present, Uncle Imp. This one is all chopped to pieces.”

God I love that passage so much. There's a lot there but what's relevant is a) both Oberyn and Garlan are trying to get a measure of who Joffrey is, and have some child murdering plans potentially in the works during this scene. Watching Joffrey destroy a priceless tome of history given as a well thought, well meant, incredibly generous (and pointed) gift from his uncle is more than enough proof for either man to decide Joffrey is not worth the headache, and please note Garlan is the only person to call Joffrey out to his face, and Oberyn is a few pages later the only person to acknowledge this was a fantastic and kind gift from Tyrion that Joffrey reacted absolutely deranged towards for no reason. and b) Tyrion is almost literally saying to Joffrey "I can be your Viserys, I can make it so you're remembered as a great king the way Daeron II or Baelor are, or a great warrior like Daeron I, but you have to understand the reason why I'm worried about your behavior" and Joffrey does the most destructive, unworthy thing he can possibly do - he quite literally destroys priceless, useful historical knowledge and wisdom with his bare hands, in favor of senseless, petulant violence. As Catelyn would say, Joffrey's real bride is not Margaery, but the war he's fighting and the crown on his head.

All of this to say - there's a lot of parallels between Sansa's situation in KL and Naery's life and these parallels are drawn not only by Sansa herself, but also by several people around her. However, I hope for better things for Sansa than what poor Naerys got - I hope for an Aemon the Dragonknight that will do more than just cry while she's raped, but actually step into that room and defend her, or else give her the power to defend herself. Despite the long wait for The Winds of Winter, I also think it's likely we will get some sort of Dragonknight, devoted sworn sword for Sansa and this person will help protect her, and Sansa will have agency that Naerys could only ever dream of.

[neechees]

I have this headcanon that Kratos went to brothels frequently enough that he essentially made multiple friends among the sex workers & they're on a first name basis. They ask him to deal with rude & disrespectful clients & are happy to chill with him

[visenyaism]

Thots on Arianne as the third dragon rider?? (I know there's barely any basis for it but that's never stopped anyone before and I like it) I haven't seen anyone even suggest it before which seems...odd to me. You're telling me mance being rhaegar is more popular than this

would be sick as fuck and she definitely does have it in her. i do think she is too caught up with “aegon” “young griff” “targaryen” who is the self-described only dragon anyone needs i don’t think she’s going to get around to claiming a different dragon. but the swag of her paranoia about her brother stealing her birthright to stealing his dragonriding protagonist complex WOULD go crazy

[attonitos-gloria]

Sansa stans dont compare her or ship her with rapists. you only ship Sanrion to use Sansa as self-insert because you want to fuck Tyrion, you don't actually like Sansa

anon. I'll be honest with you. I'll not be taking this ask seriously because I have no interest in proving to you that I like any fictional character whatsoever but I want to answer because I think it's so funny that through your hate and ignorance you can see right through me. yes I confess all my Tyrion stan act is because I think he's incredibly hot. Do I think he's the main character. Do I think he is the character that best embodies the heart of the series. Do I cry for him as if he were my friend, do I feel his chapters pulling at my heartstrings. Am I fascinated by the relationship between the way he's treated in-universe and the way he's treated by fandom. Do I believe he is the author's vessel to do meta about his own work more than any other character (for more on this also read: adwd) well yes. Yes of course to all of this. But at the end of the day im just..... thinking with my pussy because I'm a simple girl. when you do it, it is boring but when I do it.... It is actually praxis

[daenerysoftarth]

I have no proof but I think Tywin killed Joanna for reasons unrelated to medical issues after birth and then just used Tyrion to deflect his own guilt

[15-lizards]

Party bus but it’s just the Shy Maid. Faegon is driving it. But he’s fifteen he doesn’t have his license. He crashes it into Long Bridge when they go through Volantis. The Shy Maid has now been totaled

[starsofjewels]

GREETINGS!! was wondering if you feel up for it if you could do a tyrion x autistic reader? idk how you could make autism fit into the GoT world but I always feel like an outsider even in the real world and i feel tyrion would be one of the few who'd actually be accepting and not judgemental

A Kitty Cat in the Lion’s Den

Tyrion Lannister x Autistic! Lannister! Reader

(Feat.) Tywin Lannister x Autistic! Lannister! Reader

CONTENT: Autistic meltdown, small! Mention of blood/ injury, self-deprecation, the Lannisters are their own warning

Word count: 1.5k (lil pookie bear)

· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

Hi, beautiful. I absolutely loved this request !! This was only semi triggering to write, and I hope you like it. <3

I’ve just started back at college, so the drip might be dry (not that it wasn’t to begin with). I may or may not have published this during a Free Study period…

This is proof I don’t just write Gregor Clegane fics. But I do love big squishy man and his cock.

I think I probably need to make a masterlist..

· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

(A teeny PSA before we begin- I, unsurprisingly given the shit I upload on here, am autistic. I’ve struggled with it my whole life, and this is an interpretation of my own experience with autism. ASD is, as the name suggests, a spectrum, so this can’t really be a generalised fic. I put my own personal experiences with my condition into this, so if you’re also autistic/ otherwise neurodivergent and this doesn’t fit your vibes, that’s why. I can’t really explain it any other way, so yeah, here you go.)

Your entire life has served as a reminder that, whether by your own fault or some cruel will of the Gods, you are not wanted. You are the outsider, the youngest Lannister, not beautiful enough to marry off young and, decidedly, not male. Lord Tywin is consistently busy with his duties as the Hand, Tyrion hides with his wines and his whores, and Jaime has his own place in the Red Keep. You are forced to sit with your sister and her ladies, who talk too loudly and prattle on about nonsense.

Cersei, you have long established, does not like you. You aren’t really sure anyone likes you, in the traditional sense, but you know that your sister only keeps you around for fear of Tywin’s wrath. There is something in the back of your mind that remembers a younger, softer Cersei putting you in her lap, of brushing your hair and putting it in gold bows. But, that was before. Before you could walk or talk properly, before you spouted random facts on unasked for topics, before she realised you were different.

Everyone knows you are different, and no one can explain why. Not even you. All they know is to stay away from you, all they know is they’ll never understand how your little mind works.

So, you sit as nicely as you can on the outside of Cersei’s circle of ladies, and you try to focus on your sewing. You don’t like sewing, but it’s what all of the noblewomen do to pass the time, and all you want is to fit in.

“Your sewing is coming on well, my lady.”

The septa tilts your sewing slightly to look at it just a little more. It’s supposed to be a gift for your father, and it is not good. You see every uneven stitch, all of the oddities and bumps in your work that make it so you can hardly look at it. You hate it, and you hate that you can’t even sew properly.

“The stitching is all wrong…”

She takes your hands as you try, again, to pick out your newest stitch, a learned behaviour with you. Despite being with you near your whole life, since you weaned off of your nurse, you aren’t sure the septa completely understands your fascination of perfection,

“It is fine,” Her voice is soft, but you can feel her disappointment, “you are still learning, my lady, some mistakes are natural. You do not need to pull it apart- again.”

You jump when Cersei’s ladies giggle at some joke you haven’t heard, the woman beside you takes your hand, and you are reminded why you keep her so close. At least, in some way, she understands what you like and what upsets you.

Tea is served for the ladies. They give you what Cersei likes, what her ladies eat, green and red things that squish and squelch in your mouth and taste like you’ve eaten rags. And the queen sees you push them around your plate, and scoffs.

“At least try it, sister,” She sips from her wine. You feel each of her noblewomen shift, in turn, to look at you, “a Lannister lady can’t just survive off of the children’s food you eat, we can’t all eat nothing but cakes and plain bread all day.”

But you don’t, and you starve. Tywin will get you something later, you’re sure of it, as he sighs, and gently suggests you’ll need a more varied diet if you’re to marry a good husband.

The women’s giggles practically turn to cackles, which do not stop for what feels like hours. You wish they’d stop, or that you could understand what they find so utterly hilarious, so at least you may join their hysteria. You’ve put your sewing down in your lap, and you fiddle with your hair. The sept doesn’t like that, she guides your work back into your hands.

“Your father doesn’t like it if you mess your hair, sweet girl, you know that,” Her hands find your hair, carefully untangling the knots you’ve made, “try a few more stitches.”

And then, inevitably, it happens. You prick your finger on your needle, and a soft ruby comes from your noble, incomprehensible skin.

Throwing your project to the ground, you rush off as fast as your legs can manage. No one comes to find you.

You are long practised with the subtle art of trying not to cry. You pace back and forth, away from anything and everything, your hands in your hair as you do. The tears in your eyes hurt, they make you tired, and only add to your humiliation. You can do nothing right, why can you do nothing right?

You think of your sister, of perfect, beautiful, poised Cersei- She has a gaggle of women to do her bidding she is loved, and desires and you doubt she paces the halls trying not to cry. She is the lion queen, and you are her kitty-cat of a sister.

And then, you hear your name called. Followed by hurried footsteps toward you. Tyrion takes your hands in his, but you cannot even look at him.

“Has someone upset you? Cersei?”

All you can do is give him whines in response. You feel a sob bubbling in your throat, and you cannot give him the satisfaction of seeing you weak.

“Tell me.”

So you look down, you watch his eyes change from confusion, to the pity you are so used to seeing. But he is your older brother, and you know he won’t run back to Cersei, like Jaime would.

It comes in one, huge splurge, as tears fall against your skin and ruin the pretty powders your maids spent so long putting on you this morning,

“I- Was making a gift for Father-” You gasp, “And they didn’t give me anything to eat, and- and the sewing was terrible, but Septa is lying and saying it’s good and-” Another. “And I cut myself!”

His arms wrap around you, and he puts his head against you. Though much smaller than you, it offers greater comfort than he knows it does. All you can do is sob. You feel like a child.

No words are spoken as he takes you down to the kitchens, and puts you at the staff table. You are given something you eat with relish, and get a plate of pudding for your effort. There is no need for you to have any medical attention for your injury, but he has it wrapped anyway. A psychological comfort, if nothing else.

Tyrion helps you into bed, letting you reach out for the rag dolls your sister claims you’re too old for. You want your father, you want him to go and tell off Cersei, but you have your brother instead, and he at least semi-understands what it’s like to be different.

“I’m sorry,” you turn and look up at him,

“Sorry?”

He stands, walking to your window to look out at the courtyard below.

“When you look at me, what do you see?”

Tyrion is going somewhere with this, you know that much, but what, you are left wondering,

“I see… my brother.”

“Yes, you do. But the world? What does the world see? They see a drunk, lustful little man with a lion on his chest he doesn’t deserve.”

Something in you knows that it’s true. Tyrion is nothing more than his condition to the eyes of most in the Keep, most of the kingdom.

“You, you look like a Lannister. Your brokenness is inside. And I wish I could understand it.”

“It’s alright-” You sit up, clutching your doll, “It’s just… what it is. I have you, I have Father.”

Tyrion almost scoffs, he comes back from the window, passing you your water,

“Yes, you get Father, but that’s because you are utterly adorable.”

“I am adorable, aren’t I?”

“And humble, it appears.”

When Tyrion leaves, he kisses your forehead, and you know he is going to tell Father. You are the one thing they share something of a common interest in, and you suspect Tywin will make an appearance at some point. You’re right, of course.

It is Tywin’s heartbeat you listen to to calm yourself down for sleep. Your father strokes your hair, half-dozing himself. A soft, sweet moment that you are reminded Tyrion doesn’t have the privilege of.

Cersei is no longer allowed to be your main caretaker, you spend your afternoons out in the gardens, or sit entertaining yourself in Tywin’s solar. Tyrion takes you on walks, and there is something of a peaceful normality brought about.

You are still terribly disappointed in how Tywin’s gift turns out, it looks like a child made it, and when you become obviously quite upset over the manner, you have the Old Lion and his younger son to calm you. He loves it, he assures you, and Tyrion is so enamoured by it he requests his own. You know they are simply making you feel better, but you let it happen anyway.

And, perhaps, life is not so bad after all.

[jaeedraszaerysz]

JON SNOW ☆ DATING HCS

SFW 💕💕

It would probably take him a while to trust you if you hadn't known him very long.

If you grew up with or close to the Starks he tried to befriend you before Robb did

He would always be scared that he would steal your heart away

You would spend hours mocking the men and women of the courts

When Robert Baratheon came to visit you both sat outside taking the piss out of all the Lords and ladies and any twat who dared speak low of either of you.

Tyrion Lannister defos assumed u were a couple and when you told him otherwise, he just shook his head.

Catelyn would probably despise you for being so close to him.

Ned would love you though, thanking the gods silently that the boy had someone by his side.

He would probably have kissed you before he left for the nights watch and spent his nights wondering whether leaving you was worth it all.

When you eventually found your way back to him it was rather chaotic.

You were probably interrogated by tormund on arrival

Atleast until Jon saw you, never forgetting your face.

You probably punched him square in the face and then proceeded to have a huge, westeros equivalent of Oscar worthy, makeput session infront of everyone.

Ghost, when not growling at random twats, would act like a second protector when Jon wasn't by your side.

Arya either loves you or hates you

Sansa is, just like her father was, happy Jon has someone.

Bran doesn't care. He's too busy wheeling around doing seven eyes Sparrow shit or whatever he called it.

You and Davos defos spend ages tryna talk some sense into him.

He always seems to be holding you in some way

Whether it be your arm, hand, waist. He would probably play with your hands or you hair often.

Is always bloody staring

Like never stops

His eyes are for you and only you

Takes. You. Everywhere.

Like no debates. He goes, you follow. Or vice versa.

He took you with him to meet with ramsay and if he made any comment whatsoever it was straight up a routine by now.

Death stare, holds onto you twelve times tighter, kills the offender within 24 hours.

Loves it when you fall asleep on him because he's happy you feel safe with him.

Head kisses.

Need I say more?

Everywhere anytime.

Head. Fucking. Kisses.

Walking past. Head kiss.

Sat next to him at dinner. Head kiss.

In an extremely serious situation requiring your full attention. Head kiss.

Dying. Head kiss.

It's like his fucking bread and butter.

When you first met daenerys it was bad vibes.

Like very bad.

No clue why she just doesn't sit right with you.

Either grows to love you or ends up hating you with a passion.

No in-between.

He dreams of having a normal life.

He would want three kids, two boys and girl so they could protect their sister.

Maybe another direwolf or four. One for each and one for you.

Can't sleep when you aren't next to him.

Teaches you to sword fight extremely early on in your relationship.

If you were ill or pregnant he would never leave your side.

Never ever ever never.

He's convinced that you could have a hundred children and you would still be the person he loves most in the world.

Would do anything for you.

Minors DNI below this line.

NSFW ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 (implied female reader)

Worships you like no one else

Touching you always.

Passes it off for his hand on your back but in reality he's secretly caressing your ass, or will have his arms under your cloak, passing it off as a hug, and will gently squeeze your boobs.

Neck kisses.

His favourite thing in the world.

Loves to leave marks on you wherever he can.

Has definitely kissed every inch of your body

Gives no fucks about scars or hair or anything of the sort.

Boobs.

Lives laughs loves your boobs.

Will lay with his face buried in them at any time.

Minor inconvenience? Someone was being a twat? He's tired?

Boob pillow.

Will eat you out for hours.

Insatiable.

You have any problems at all? Sit on his face.

If he's had a bad day he will legit just stuff his face between your thighs.

His fave place.

Says that if you suffocated him it would be an amazing way to go.

Probably prefers giving but he will never say no to receiving.

His dick is probs like 6-7 inches.

Takes tormunds advice very seriously.

Loves to see how many fingers you can take before he stuffs you.

Will go for as many rounds as you need.

Always a gentleman, making sure your comfortable and that your satisfied.

Cockwarming he loves.

Cuddles afterwards.

He will slide out of you and pull you onto on him, pulling the blankets up and wrapping his body around yours.

Calls you love but with his gorgeous deep voice.

Has a sexy asf morning voice.

He's so whipped for you he can't function somedays.

[augment-techs]

Now that I have access to good quality pictures of The Coinless #1, I believe I can give it a proper review~

SO LET'S GET STARTED!!

I'm gonna start with saying the art here was fucking gorgeous. And I’m not gonna cover the basic points, too many people already have. Just lil things that held MY attention, knowing all the plot twists and spoilers~

Does this mean Drakkon DID have public executions in the street??

Bulk/Kim crumbs!!! Bulk is such a Simp man. OHHH

and and and— he tells Skull everything. Every part of his day. And I think skull hears, Skull understands.

This might get a little out of order now, but

It’s so sad the way she sits here bundled up like this. It also melts my heart. And she misses Zack So MUCH. And the guilt is swallowing her whole.

SHE IS NOT YOURS—

You know what I’d be up to kill him too if I were in this world.

ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE MOMENT OTP DOUBLE TEAMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!! Please I love THIS SO MUCH.

Bro deserved this shot ngl.

…now why do you have this stowed away like this, huh jason? Are we keeping the trauma like a trophy?? Are you going to wear that when you leave your little recluse’s hut???

Untreated PTSD made worse by more incoming trauma. This guy got so fucked up and yet he finds a way for ME to be annoyed at HIM.

Baby. Baby. Babyyyyyyy. Ultimate himbo Simp. BBY!!

These women are in LOVE by the way. For the record. Just so you know. And every single scene they had deserved a post of its own because HHHHH

But this one in particular. They’re SOFT but they’re pretending to be so tough. They just need a HUG. That’ll fix like 99.9% problems.

Also does anyone remember what did happen to the scorpina of that universe??

This is so funny to me and I don’t even know why

Iconic shot. Could hear the BONK noise in the background.

Glad finster got this moment. Even if it was short lived~

Zack what are. You. Trying. To. Achieve. Why does he keep calling her out like this?? Like he's ridiculing her for what happened to HIM?! WHAT. IS. THIS.

Also does this mean we get lava zombie kim???

HE SAID HIS NAME HE SAID HIS NAME HE SAID—

oh he betrayed them.

oH buLk is hurt.

aSDFGH

Like i said, the art was GORGEOUS. Drakkon was annoying as fuck. I needed to punch him in every single shot he was in.

This feels like a potential redemption arc for him, and I don’t LIKE IT. I don’t like redemption arcs. 99.9% of them. They’re almost never done right.

Obviously, this COULD be something really good, but I feel like

Also the fact that all of the characters not explicitly mentioned are all zombies now saddens me beyond explanation. It somehow kills scope for fanfiction to me?

But on the bright side, Bulk’s development is some of the best of the BEST. He’s the glue that’s holding the team together, he’s also the guy who thought he’d never get this, the underdog, the guy who thinks he doesn’t deserve any of this, and yet, and yet in every interaction of the team, he shines through. He’s the one who’s holding them all together, even though his own world— aka skull— is collapsing.

and i hope we get more development for him.

And please please PLEASE can we have everyone turn back to normal when this shit ends?! These people need a goddamn break.

[rynnthefangirl]

Personally I don't trust anyone who refers to Rhaenryra's first three sons as Strong boys especially if they are Team Black.

Sure they might dislike them! You might even dislike them for the most basic and petty reasons like they're just boring or you just don't vibe with them. Perfectly fine.

I just want to know why if they don't like them for reasons that have nothing to do with their status as bastards they call them "bastard boys" 👀

I'm not judging then for not liking my favorites, I'm judging them because I see the neon sign of a retrograde prejudice that should be eliminated and they're lying to my face telling me which is not true.

It's the same as those who swear they don't dislike Rhaenryra for misogynistic reasons while judging her in contrast to Alicent following the Madonna/Whore dichotomy, they call her a whore (because three, maybe four if you think she did sleep with Laenor and not just Lana, Daemon and Harwin, without exchanging anything for consensual sex is without a doubt slutty behavior and not a misogynistic social judgment) and classify her as spoiled for wanting the same rights as a man.

No bias here! Just fair and objective shots 🙄

Nah FR though! As soon as I see “the Strong boys” or “the Bastards” it’s like, oh okay I’m dealing with one of the THOSE people. It’d be like people who dislike Tyrion persistently calling him “the Imp” or “the Dwarf” in fandom. Why are you using the insults of Medieval bigots, it’s weird.

Some people just fail to grasp that there is a difference between saying something like:

“I don’t like that Rhaenyra had bastards because that causes further succession issues, and for the sake of stability it’s best that a true born son sits the throne instead of Jace.”

And saying something like:

“Rhaenyra is such a selfish whore. I hate the bastards and can’t wait for them to die. Bastard blood must be cleansed from the throne!”

Or rather, I don’t think that it’s that they fail to grasp it, but they refuse to ACKNOWLEDGE it. Because they are haters and want to use the most extreme tone and language to express their hatred. Which— hey, I get it, I’m a TG hater and love to trash talk Aegon II, Aemond, Alicent, etc. But can we at least acknowledge that you ARE using prejudiced language and embracing medieval bigotry, and understand how weird of a choice that is?

[atopvisenyashill]

there’s a few potential sansa romantic endgames that i think have some textual basis and i think all of them come with a lot of issues wrt sansa being able to publically claim these relationships which is why i think sansa will say her children are “fathered by a wolf” because regardless of Who she’s with or even the legality of it, she’s going to be actively concealing their identity AND YET she needs to have children.

i think especially that even though arya’s love life is guaranteed to be less complicated, sansa will feel obligated to take this “burden” of ensuring their line onto herself; she wants arya to have the freedom to go where she pleases, be with who she pleases, and follow her passions and that is not easy to do if everyone is expecting you to come home and start popping out kids. I consider them a sort of reflection of ned and lyanna in this way in that sansa, second born and not meant to rule, uses her newfound power to let the wild, youngest girl (but not youngest child) in the family follow her passions wherever they may take her.

this is all kind of weird with the nixed time jump but considering that george has talked about writing stories from arya’s pov about her adventures, I think it’s going to be fairly important in story regardless of their ages that arya will attempt to offer to stay home and marry and have children as a way of helping to protect sansa’s very shaky claim on winterfell but that sansa encourages arya to do whatever she wants. to travel, to help shepherd the boatloads of refugees from the various wars to wherever they want to call home, to settle displaced northerners in other parts of westeros as well, to get involved in the lives of the people arya is helping and agree to help them liberate their own homes by using her skills (crucial here that arya is A leader but not the SOLE leader), or to go out into the woods and be a secret not-quite-an-outlaw (bc sansa isn’t outlawing anything that could hurt arya’s lil crusades, probably is helping bankroll arya) to bring justice to the smallfolk, like whatever it is arya wants to do with her life, the point is that she offers to give it up and sansa refuses to take the offer.

and then we have the idea that her kids are fathered by a wolf. not elizabeth-ing herself here exactly because she’s having children but never publicly acknowledging a father or a husband or even a lover.

i think the candidates most likely are jon snow and theon, with both brienne and podrick as like “i’m not saying he’s gonna do it but i am saying they make a lot of sense narratively” and aegon vi as a huge long shot but still undeniable contender. if briensa does go canon everyone owes me five bucks each tho. i think the options other people float are not just wildly unserious they also clearly don’t think sansa will be The Ruling Lady Of Winterfell, but some much more minor or less emotionally resonant title and i just do not vibe with that shit at all. harry the heir, sandor, sweetrobin, tyrion, littlefucker, like never mind sansa never once showing any real interest in these guys and NONE of these dudes being satisfied by the idea of being her secret husband, if sansa says to arya “yeah i’m marrying tyrion” arya is going “blink twice if you’re being held hostage and you need me to kill him” but it’s too late because jon snow is already unsheathing longclaw and bran is attacking with every raven in winterfell. it’s not fucking happening and imo it’s unserious to pretend like it could happen in canon. (and if it DOES happen in canon you will find me rocking up to george’s house in jersey and demanding to know why he’s so weird about teenage girls). i think margaery is a huge long shot here (and not just bc it would make them both canonically on screen gay) because i don’t think she’s gonna live to the ending, and jeyne poole is too traumatized at this point in time for me to feel confident in putting her in the same category as brienne and pod.

(theon’s trauma is WHY i think he’s still a contender - post reek theon is going to struggle a lot with figuring out where he’s supposed to be, who he’s supposed to be, and who he can trust as he puts himself back together, and that lends itself nicely to the idea of a secret husband/lover imo. once again, we are talking extreme trauma bonding here - that’s just the only way i see sansa’s romances going).

if you’re asking “who do you think arya is winding up with” it’s gendry. i don’t doubt that there were some plans for edric dayne, arya, and gendry but i think gendry was always going to be her great love here, that she’s always going to turn down the idea of marriage to him but gendry doesn’t care so long as they are still together. there’s a neon blinking sign over gendry’s head that says “endgame material” and i think it’s unserious to pretend it’s not there too!!

[yandere-daze]

This is probably the most niche thing I have ever posted but I just finished playing Tyrion Cuthbert: Attorney of the Arcane ( a game you should totally play btw!!) and I have many horrible thoughts about this man. I´m going to go insane if I don´t put this out into the world sooo... here we go!

I also feel like at some parts it kind of doubles as a character study so take that, I guess?

MAJORS SPOILERS FOR TYRION CUTHBERT: ATTORNY OF THE ARCANE! Please play the game!

3.4k words

gn reader

tw yandere, stalking, manipulation, murder, societal pressure, guilt-tripping, obsession

General Yandere! Aster Headcanons

So Aster himself is a very interesting character in my opinion. He´s very idealistic and sees the corruption of the nobility in the kingdom to be completely unacceptable. He cares a great deal about the commonfolk and because of that, the crown prince is very well-liked by the public, even before he becomes the king

Compared to many other nobles who are haughty, arrogant, or intimidating, Aster gives off the vibes of someone who is very friendly and approachable. Something about him just feels different in comparison.

And it is this friendly and open-minded appearance that would make his darling feel more at ease when approaching him to talk. Talking to Aster just doesn´t feel as scary or annoying as having to speak with other nobles. His positive attitude actually makes conversing with him an enjoyable experience

I think it might actually be more likely for him to fall for a commoner instead of a noble. Nobles in the court are cutthroat and only interested in their own wealth and power and Aster is just sick of that. You being a commoner means that there´s a better chance for you to actually be an honest and hard-working person, something I think he would want in a partner.

If you are a commoner, you might accidentally meet him when Aster is out and visiting the city for once. As we can see in Chapter 3, he would try to hide his identity as the crown prince from you if you don´t recognize him. He much prefers you talking to him as if he was simply any other person as opposed to you bowing down before him and carefully choosing your words if you were to find out who he was. He would instruct the Kingsguard to follow him a bit more discreetly, so as not to catch your eye and to never openly acknowledge his title when in your presence. He´d hate for this casualness with you to be destroyed like that.

You two talk about your daily life and the struggles you face ( him being very careful and vague when talking about his own profession, as he doesn´t want you to find out about his rank). Even though he gives off a cheerful and exciteable impression, he is indeed listening very carefully to what you have to say and makes sure to memorize it all. He needs to know everything there is to know about you, needs to know all of your preferences and opinions.

He listens especially carefully when you mention your frustrations with the nobility, how they wield all the power and money in the world and keep it to themselves while the common folk have to slave away while worrying about if they can afford the roof above their heads this month. His gaze noticeably darkens for a moment as he hears this but it´s quickly gone when he nods his head and agrees with what you´re saying. The nobility is a blight on this land.

It´s very frustrating for Aster to hear this because he knows it´s true. His visits have shown him firsthand how bad daily life for the common folk can be. He has seen with his own eyes how the members of noble houses can get away with absolutely anything. Even the justice system protects them, all their crimes are simply swept under the rug or an innocent civilian is forced to take the fall for them. It´s atrocious and Aster is so frustrated that nothing is done about it. He wants things to change but he´s only the crown prince, he doesn´t yet have the power to change things. He needs to bide his time until he becomes king and then he will rip all these corrupt off their power.

But it´s still quite some time until then so for now, he needs to focus on what he can do while he´s still powerless.

Hearing you speak about wanting to make the world a better place for the common folk in your own way with such conviction really resonates with Aster. All his life, he´s been surrounded by vultures trying to curry favor with him for when he ascends the throne in the future. He has seen countless forced smiles and false promises but he can see in your eyes that you speak with truth and honesty. And he can´t help but really resonate with that. He likes talking with someone like-minded that doesn´t treat him differently, someone that he can be himself around.

Aster can´t help but visit the city more frequently from then on, telling his father that he has important business to attend to there as an excuse. Well, it´s not really a lie, is it? Seeking you out couldn´t be any more important to him.

You´re quite surprised by how often you seem to randomly see Aster nowadays when you hadn´t at all seen him before but maybe he just moved in recently? You don´t know that he secretly orders guards to follow you around daily to then report to him what you did all day. As much as it pains him, he can´t simply go out every single day so hearing about your day is the next best thing. This way, he also gets to learn about the things you do in your day-to-day life or the things you do when you think no one is watching. Oh, how he longs to have been there himself, just watching you! His heart yearns for you and yet his princely duties often leave him way too busy to visit you as often as he would like to. But well, at least he always knows exactly where to find you if he ever finds himself with enough free time <3

But well, there is one very simple but very big problem with this situation, aside from him being the crown prince and you a commoner. He has been in an arranged marriage for years now. Ever since they were little, Aria Steelwind, a noble of one of the four main noble houses has been promised to him. And he has never been more disgruntled by this than now.

Sure, he did respect Aria in some ways. Instead of simply living her cozy noble life, she took her own path as a prosecutor to fight for justice within the corruption that is their justice system. She´s the only prosecutor willing to arrest a noble for their crimes and yet, her actions change so very little. What a naive fool she is to think that working within the system is going to have any sort of lasting impact.

No, Aster knows better. He has seen his father having to make all sorts of compromises to not displease the nobility when introducing changes. What was left were only hollow words and small changes. Small changes would never be enough to truly change this world for the better. Aster knows that if he wants things to change, he will have to take things into his own hands

From there on out, things would go over much like in the game during case 5, which is why this is my last major spoiler warning. Please do not continue reading from here if you don´t want the game spoiled for you as I will discuss the events happening at the end here.

Alright, so. Case 5. Naturally, for the sake of continuing this headcanon post, I´ll have to change up things a bit because otherwise, Aster is a little bit too dead to continue plaguing his darling afterwards. So let´s assume that in this timeline, Aster actually gets away with his crimes for one reason or another.

He used Aria´s affection and love for him and tricked her into signing a blood contract by disguising it as a marriage license. Now, Aster has full control over her mind and body, her soul forever his to use. And he didn´t hesitate for even a moment to use her as a means to further his own goals.

It was way too easy to use the contract to control her body, forcing her to go out and kill several important nobles attending the king´s funeral while he stayed behind, creating an alibi for himself. And truly, after several witnesses saw Aria kill these pesky nobles, who would ever think the new king would have anything to do with it? He wasn´t even close to any of the crime scenes!

And of course, it´s even easier to completely erase Aria´s memories of what took place. And now that he has completely covered his tracks, no one can prove that Aster had anything to do with it.

By doing all of this, Aster has killed two birds with one stone: He has successfully killed two heads of four of the main noble houses and his fianceé is going to prison for what she has done, effectively ending their engagement. Now Aster is the one sitting on the throne with the noble houses significantly weakened without a family head to guide them, making them less of a threat to his power. Now that he has all the power, he will change the kingdom for the better.

Of course, the common folk only learn about the fact that Aster has ascended the throne with the news kindly leaving out the fact that a massacre had taken place. Still, with this new information getting out it´s almost impossible for you not to learn of Aster´s true identity. All this time, the person you had been conversing with so casually was the then-prince, now-king of this kingdom. To say you´re shocked would be an understatement. What are you supposed to do now? Oh, you can´t even begin to think about how many times you must have disrespected him by speaking to him as if he were simply any other person. Surely nobles must have some sort of rules regarding addressing people, no?

Oh, you must have embarrassed yourself thoroughly in front of him! But then again, he was very nice when he was talking to you and even enjoyed joking around. So maybe he was different? You weren´t quite sure but thinking about it that way made things easier for you.

To say you were shocked when King Aster de Wyverngarde stood in front of your door one day would be a grave understatement. You don´t know what to say or what to do, now that you know who he truly was. Are you supposed to bow down in front of him? I mean he´s the king so you probably should, right?

Aster merely sighs disappointedly when you clumsily bow down in front of him.

"There´s no need for such formalities. We´re close, right? You don´t need to bow down in front of me."

"But.. you´re the king, right? I mean, it feels weird to talk to you so normally now."

He´s quite saddened to hear this. He knew this would be how you would react if you found out the truth, it´s the very reason why he went to such lengths to prevent you from finding out.

"Don´t worry, nothing has changed between the both of us. May I take you for a walk?"

He smiles and offers his arm to you, only nodding his head and assuring you that it´s fine when you seem to hesitate. So you go along and let him lead you out of your home and into the bustling center of the city, where the streets are filled with people. Naturally, everyone gathers outside and cheers when they see the new king walking along the streets.

Aster is very well-liked by the common folk for his open and honest demeanor and his willingness to help them. Everyone has high hopes for him, believing that he will be the one to finally make things fairer for them, the one to push back against the corrupt nobles using them for their own gain. And well, in one way or another, they´re certainly right about that. Aster doesn´t hesitate when it comes to removing vultures feeding off of other´s hard work.

After getting over their initial excitement over seeing the beloved king, people begin to notice that you´re holding onto his arm as he walks you around town with a wide smile on his face and people begin whispering amongst themselves. Who are you and why are you with the prince? Judging from your clothes, you are a commoner just like them so how do you know him? And young Aster seems to be holding you awfully close, is something going on there? Everyone has heard that the engagement with Aria Steelwind fell through because she had turned out to be just as corrupt as all the other nobles, breaking Aster´s heart. Were you his new love? It would certainly be something for the king to be in love with a commoner.

You´re beginning to notice the people whispering and you get quite uncomfortable at their staring when Aster suddenly stops and turns around to face you. You almost walk right into his arms at the sudden stop, a sheepish look on your face. Aster simply smiles and takes one of your hands into his, staring right into your eyes.

And then the rug is pulled from right under your feet as Aster gets down on one knee, the crowd quickly bursting into cheers as he pulls out a small little box and presents it to you.

"My love", he begins speaking and you feel your heart plummet into your stomach. You notice that he seems to be talking quite loudly on purpose, as the crown quickly reacts to his words, growing silent as to listen carefully.

" We have known each other for a long time now. We had to hide and share our love in secret. But from this day onward, I want us to show ourselves to the rest of the world, to let them see the love and devotion we have for one another."

You´re just standing there, frozen in shock, almost incapable of processing his words. Our love? Just what was he talking about?!

"As you well know, I have gone through immense heartbreak in the past, I have had my trust and heart broken once before but with you, I want to start over. I trust you completely and vow to be by your side for all eternity if you will have me. I love you more than anything, my love. Will you give me the honor of taking me as your husband?"

The atmosphere is tense, the people around you holding their breath in anticipation but some voices still ring out from inside the crowd.

"I can´t believe it, a king proposing to a commoner! His love for them must be so strong, it´s so romantic!"

"The king is such a kind and benevolent soul, they must be overcome with happiness right now! Look, I think they´re on the verge of tears!"

"It truly is terrible what happened with his past engagement. To be betrayed like that, His Majesty must have been beside himself with grief. He deserves this new chance at love."

You hear voices ringing out all around you, and you feel completely overwhelmed, unsure of what you should do now. Everyone looks at you so expectantly, everyone is practically screaming at you to say yes and yet, that´s not what you want. You´ve never even thought about marrying Aster, to have this sprung on you so suddenly is terrifying. You feel like you´re losing your grip on yourself when you suddenly feel a squeezing feeling on your hand.

With a start, you look down to see Aster holding your hand tightly, enacting almost an excruciating amount of pressure. The look on his face is more akin to a smirk now than the soft and innocent look he had before. He knows that there´s no way you could say no under these circumstances. By dragging you out into a public area he has forced your hand to agree to his proposal.

What foolish commoner would ever reject a king? It would be a blatant show of disrespect and they would surely be shunned by their peers for being so ungrateful. Furthermore, Aster had a great reputation amongst the common folk, no one would show you any sympathy if you tried telling them that he was lying about you being in love. Who would ever believe you over the ruler of this country? If they´re being charitable they would chalk up your protests to being shy about the entire ordeal.

You´d also have to be a real monster to reject King Aster´s heartfelt declaration of love after he had already been betrayed by his past fianceé not very long ago. How could you hurt him after what he went through? Of course, no one knows what really happened with Aria, no one knows how Aster was the one who used and manipulated her. The truth had been conveniently hidden from the public and twisted to serve his own goals. After all, who would want a known murderer sitting on the throne?

And it is through all this pressure that you finally crumble, a solemn expression on your face as you mutter the word Aster had been wanting to hear you say so desperately.

"Yes", you relent.

The dark expression on his face immediately vanishes and he gets up from his kneeing position, wrapping one arm around you while using his other hand to slide the ring on your finger. This is the happiest day in his life and sooner or later, you will see this his way.

Naturally, after what you had just witnessed, the facade is gone and you no longer see Aster as an innocent and kind person only looking out for the best of others. You don´t learn about the true darkness within him and the crimes he has committed in the name of "doing what needs to be done", but you know that he can´t be fully trusted.

Aster is of course saddened by this because he wants you to love him just as much as he loves you but he figures that there´s nothing to be done about it now. You will simply grow to love him in time, there is no other option for you now. Your fate is already sealed, how would you ever get away from the king and more importantly, your fiance? You two are engaged and everyone knows about it, he made sure that the news would be spread fast. A king marrying a commoner is very unorthodox and almost scandalous but if anything, it only makes the common folk trust him even more.

Now that you´re engaged, Aster won´t let you stay at your old home anymore, he sends a carriage to immediately pick you up and take you to the castle where you will be living for the rest of your days. There, he will try to spend as much time with you as possible within his very busy schedule. He believes that sooner or later, you will come around to your new life. He understands that this must be all very shocking for you right now but he´s sure you will get used to it.

In the meantime, he will gift you anything you might ever wish for. Anything to get you accustomed to your new life by his side, anything to win back your favor after the stunt he had pulled when proposing to you.

Rest assured though that he´ll never let you wander away from him too far. You´ll spend most of your time within the castle walls and when he can´t be with you, he will still send guards to trail behind you and keep you safe while also keeping tabs on you.

He tries to be soft with you, trying really hard to gain back your trust. He quite likes holding you close, holding your hand, or kissing your cheek. It feels so romantic. This is the love he had been denied all his life, this is what he always wanted.

Naturally, he won´t let anyone interfere with your relationship. You are his and anyone that thinks differently has to be removed. He has no remorse when it comes to getting rid of any perceived rivals, though he wouldn´t get his hands dirty himself. Anyone that defies him must be removed, it´s the only way that he can build his ideal world, a world in which you are by his side forevermore.

[asoiaf-essays-collector]

For me, idk if Sansa is the girl in grey in Melisandre's prophecy and i don't care if they reunite at the Wall, in the Vale, in Winterfell or on the way, because the thing is its almost given that Sansa and Jon will be the first Starks to reunite since they are the most distant ones. Its how grrm works. The Starks are the central family of the series and out of their four povs that remain, Jon and Sansa are the only ones to not have a defined relationship and their reunion in twow before others will give them time to develop one.

In defence of the girl in grey theory - at this point it almost impossible to imagine her being not sansa. As much as I would prefer the vale meeting. Just think of it - Jon and Melisandre were thinking that the girl in grey would be Arya but ironically it was Jeyne Pool/Alys Karstark who happened to be geographically more convenient? Nah, that's not the irony of GRRM. Now, Sansa who Jon barely registers as sister in his inner pov - that would be the irony that we are used to in ASOIAF.

The girl in grey being not the Stark but someone else entirely just because this girl fits the criteria? It's not interesting. It gives the same vibes as theory that Cersei's valonqar is neither Tyrion nor Jaime and some other person that just happens to be someone else's younger sibling. That's just boring.

"Jon and Sansa are the only ones to not have a defined relationship" - oooh, now that's the topic I can speculate about for hours.

I'm rereading ASOS right now and gosh, the ways GRRM chooses to portray these two while their lack of any established relationship in books? That's simply fascinating how he dances around some words and names.

One of the most interesting part of this lack of interactions is the fact that it doesn't mean that they don't have this defined relationship. Their meeting and then dynamic will be a total wild card - unlike any other pair of siblings. They can literally have any dynamic and shared history or lack of it and we have no idea what it will be. I'm so excited!

And it's not only that. There is a conflict between them too - until they learn that Bran and Rickon are alive they both are kinda heirs of Starks and Winterfell, both are ruler coded since AGOT and their political strengths complement each other's weaknesses. Moreover, both can support each other's claim. Sansa Stark while being legitimate heir in many lords eyes is still married to Lannister and everyone knows it and she is also a girl who doesn't know how to wage a war. On the other hand Jon Snow even with Stark blood printed on his Ned Stark (who is still beloved in the North) face is still a bastard and can't interfere with claim of legitimate heirs (given that Robb's will is still unknown). One of them on his/her own can raise a lot of questions but two can make a decent claim.

So yeah.

Sansa and Jon meeting first of the pack is making quite a lot of sense from every point of view. It's not just that they are most distant siblings and thus make more interesting pair to interact, it's also very practical for GRRM if he wants Starks to go on the offensive - two of them combined can actually form a decent political power (in terms of both claim and set of skills). No other pair of Starks has that.

[axelsagewrites]

Their reaction to seeing the Barbie movie with you

Includes (in order): jamie, jon, drogo, obryen, podrick, ramsay, robb, sandor, theon, tormund, tyrion, arya, brienne, danerys, margery, sansa, yara, aegon, aemond, daemon, jace, alicent, baela, rhaena, rhaenyra

Word count: 952

Masterlist Here

GoT Boys

Jamie - he practically refused to go up till the last second then finally caved but once the movie starts, he starts tearing up because he also does not feel Kenenough

Jon – he defiantly was the one to ask to go see the movie but insists to all his friends he’s going because you wanted to

Khal Drogo – agrees to go on the condition of seeing Oppenheimer before but the only thing he talks about for the following week is barbie

Obryen – it was your idea for the tickets but his for the matching pink outfits and photoshoot beforehand and he definitely rolls his eyes at anyone who sees Oppenheimer instead

Podrick – desperate to see barbie with you and is excited the whole week leading up to it. he’s already buying tickets for next week as your leaving the theatre

Ramsay - you both argue about whether to see Oppenheimer or barbie and eventually it gets settled by agreeing to see the separate movies at the same time as long as he gets you a large popcorn as punishment for having no taste

Robb – doesn’t get the fuss at first but as soon as he is sat in the cinema chair, he is mesmerised by the movie

Sandor – if you think this man would be caught dead sitting watching barbie, you’d be sorely mistaken. however, that’s mostly because he hates leaving the house, but he will pirate the movie and watch it on the sofa with you

Theon – makes fun of the movie constantly and says you should go see Oppenheimer instead but when you get to the theatre, he’s sheepishly holding two barbie tickets

Tormund – buys the tickets for you before you even ask and hypes up your pink barbie outfit, buys himself a bright pink t-shirt and just goes for the good vibes

Tyrion – goes with you unashamed and in a bright pink suit insisting if he was in barbie world, he’d be a barbie or at least an Allan not just another Ken

GoT Girls

Arya – insists it can’t be that good and even pretends to hate it but the next day she sneaks off to go see it again alone and then you end up finding a new barbie she bought in her room

Brienne – she felt a bit embarrassed about going at first, but she ended up relating to the movie so much that she cried and bought herself a barbie dream house to heal her inner child

Daenerys – she didn’t think she’d like it since she has more of a horror vibe however once it starts, she starts tearing up and secretly loves it

Margery – she bought out like half the cinema getting tickets for her and her squad and plans matching outfits for everyone to go in and makes 1000 TikTok’s about the whole thing

Sansa – she has been planning this since the movie was announced and is ready with a Pinterest board of outfits for you to pick with

Yara – defiantly put up a fight and wanted to see Oppenheimer instead but she is a sucker for you and eventually agrees and pretends she didn’t love it afterwards even though barbie is now all she can think about

HotD Boys

Aegon – all he talks about is barbie which mainly started to wind Aemond but when you offered to get tickets he jumped at the chance and started taking it seriously to the point of buying a custom “I’m the ken, they’re barbie” shirt with a pink arrow pointing at you

Aemond – he really wanted to see Oppenheimer first, but he cannot say no to you so finally caved and went with you, but he was on the edge of his seat all night and you missed the first 10 minutes of Oppenheimer since he wouldn’t stop talking about barbie

Daemon – when you tell him you want to go, he ends up pulling strings and tells you that you’re going to the official premier by giving you a brand new custom pink dress and even rocks up in a pink suit to match

Jace – this man bought these tickets the first day they were listed and is defending Margot Robbie online when he is not gushing to you how amazing it was and how good your barbie premier outfit was

HotD girls

Alicent – she tried to play it off cool as if it weren’t her thing but was secretly thrilled you asked her to go however, she only played it cool till opening credits started and she squealed in excitement

Baela – you didn’t think she’d be too interested since she was more of a tom boy than her sister but she surprised you by whipping out the massive box of barbies from her closet from her childhood when she begged you to go with her even though you had already said yes like twenty times

Rhaena –she has been playing the barbie sound track over and over, crying at half the songs and dancing with you around the house to the next so you bet your ass she went to watch it on the premier day Heleana – for some reason she was really nervous to ask you to go with her but when she did you of course said yes, and she started planning a pastel pink outfit and ordered you both custom barbie earrings from Esty

Rhaenyra – she was down to see it, even getting the best seats in advance for you but she did not expect it to heal her inner child so much since she stopped playing with barbies after her mother died since she thought her mum looked like barbie

Taglist: @clairacassidy @nyotamalfoy @valeskafics

A/n: Take a moment to appreciate how many god damn tags I had to type to the point I maxed it out and had to try cut the tags down! Anyway live laugh barbie