#Two traumatized ppl trying to get the other to live

[caffeinatedattorney]

Bruce knew Harvey as the guy who went from zero to a hundred and viceversa. It scared their peers. Bruce understood it, to a degree.

It happened enough at school. Bruce would find his way into another fight, pay his dues after school, dread Alfred's scolding tone when he returned to his father's house... And one out of ten times Harvey Dent would join him in it after school.

"I can't keep going like this," Harvey muttered one day. He was watching the clock on the wall above the recently wiped board, now basked in the setting sun. His eyes were looking up, pleading at something in the ceiling. "This won't end well for me."

Bruce sat beside Harvey, laying his head down on his arms on his desk. Did Harvey really believe that? "What was it this time?"

Harvey blinks rapidly as he looks down at his desk. He turned a torn notebook page into smithereens with his fingers and only now seemed to notice.

Harvey looks devastated. "Some guy, not in our grade. He said... Weird things about us. He mocked you for your parents," he glances at the clock again. "I don't know what came over me, but, suddenly I was really close. He said I was nothing to you and I-I..." Harvey turns to Bruce, eyes disappointed in his own moral failing. "I beat him until he stopped moving. "

Bruce glances at the desk and finds the teacher, Mr maddox fast asleep, drooling on the lapels of his suit. Bruce uss the opportunity to get up and squeeze Harvey's shoulder, making Harvey flinch.

But, upon realizing Bruce isn't about to hit him, he smiles.

"Harvey," Bruce says. "You have to defend yourself sometimes. You gotta put the fear in them. Let them know you are not to be messed with."

Harvey shrinks on himself, thinking about it, his eyes look inward and he hums. "but, I don't want to hurt people... "

Bruce grabs Harvey's other shoulder and levels with him, harvey's eyes are so brown and trusting in a way Bruce can't get used to. He's not a role model, he doesn't think he can ever be, but he hates seeing Harvey doing this to himself. Bruce would've done the same.

"Sometimes you gotta. Your life or theirs."

Something clicks within harvey. It takes a second to process then he nods. "Okay," he says softly. "Thank you, Bruce."

Bruce smiles. "You are welcome."

Upon closer inspection, all Harvey has on him is a few cuts and a bruise under his eye. Maybe Bruce should call Leslie. Maybe what Harvey needs is a hug and a supportive family and Bruce is doing nothing here.

But something about Harvey makes Bruce feel 'supported' as Leslie would put it. Maybe Bruce does the same for Harvey sometimes? "You okay?" Bruce asks.

Harvey chuckles. A crooked grin is now cemented in his face despite the cuts. "Don't worry. I'll live."

[hollowed-theory-hall]

I think what’s frustrating for me in ootp (which is still 100% my favorite book despite this) is how everyone treats Harry like his anger is childish/unreasonable. Like guys he watched a classmate get murdered last year (among other traumatic things). And then he was isolated a from everyone he cares about and forced to live with people who treat him worse than dirt. The fact Hermione is kind of scared of him when he thinks Sirius is being tortured in the DOM? Idk, it just never sat right with me. Ppl treat Harry like a loose canon or an angsty kid and it minimizes the real trauma he endured

I get what you're saying, but I think the way people treat him and his anger is very much in line with what we see from the Wizarding World. The Wizarding World doesn't really understand trauma or mental health as a whole. They have no concept of therapy of psychiatric care of any kind. The only mind treatment they have is to do with healing spell damage (like Obliviations or Legilemancy). So, it's a society that doesn't really know what to do with someone like Harry, they don't have the tools to help him and people around him just don't really understand.

Ron and Hermione care about Harry, but due to their own life experiences, they have no real ability to relate to him over his trauma and understand him. That's kinda the point in this conversation:

“Don’t sit there grinning like you know better than I do, I was there, wasn’t I?” he said heatedly. “I know what went on, all right? And I didn’t get through any of that because I was brilliant at Defense Against the Dark Arts, I got through it all because — because help came at the right time, or because I guessed right — but I just blundered through it all, I didn’t have a clue what I was doing — STOP LAUGHING!” The bowl of murtlap essence fell to the floor and smashed. He became aware that he was on his feet, though he couldn’t remember standing up. Crookshanks streaked away under a sofa; Ron and Hermione’s smiles had vanished. “You don’t know what it’s like! You — neither of you — you’ve never had to face him, have you? You think it’s just memorizing a bunch of spells and throwing them at him, like you’re in class or something? The whole time you know there’s nothing between you and dying except your own — your own brain or guts or whatever — like you can think straight when you know you’re about a second from being murdered, or tortured, or watching your friends die — they’ve never taught us that in their classes, what it’s like to deal with things like that — and you two sit there acting like I’m a clever little boy to be standing here, alive, like Diggory was stupid, like he messed up — you just don’t get it, that could just as easily have been me, it would have been if Voldemort hadn’t needed me —”

(OotP, 327)

They try, but they don't really get it. And after this conversation, they try more, and they make more of an effort to understand what Harry is talking about.

We see Sirius, who has his fair share of issues, understands and relates to Harry better from the get-go:

“Since when did someone have to be in the Order of the Phoenix to ask questions?” asked Sirius. “Harry’s been trapped in that Muggle house for a month. He’s got the right to know what’s been happen —”

(OotP, 87)

He understands Harry would want to know what's going on after being trapped for a month — he's in exactly the same boat, he knows.

“But if they do expel me,” said Harry, quietly, “can I come back here and live with you?” Sirius smiled sadly. “We’ll see.” “I’d feel a lot better about the hearing if I knew I didn’t have to go back to the Dursleys,” Harry pressed him. “They must be bad if you prefer this place,” said Sirius gloomily.

(OotP, 115)

He understands the situation with the Dursleys and wants to help, but has no way to do so. He can't make promises Dumbledore would override him on. He cares about Harry and has the life experience to relate to him.

As does Luna, who experienced her mother's death:

Harry nodded curtly, but found that for some reason he did not mind Luna talking about Sirius. He had just remembered that she too could see thestrals.

(OotP, 863)

The problem isn't that people around him don't care (I mean, some don't) but in the case of Ron and Hermione, they just don't get it. They're teenagers in a culture that just doesn't conceive mental health as a thing. Wizards happily let inmates in Azkaban go mad and drive themselves to suicide, it's even expected according to Fudge. It's not our world and culture, so I'm not surprised by it. This scene with Hermione also showcases it well:

“Well, it’s like Hagrid said, they can look after themselves,” said Hermione impatiently, “and I suppose a teacher like Grubbly Plank wouldn’t usually show them to us before N.E.W.T. level, but, well, they are very interesting, aren’t they? The way some people can see them and some can’t! I wish I could.” “Do you?” Harry asked her quietly. She looked horrorstruck. “Oh Harry — I’m sorry — no, of course I don’t — that was a really stupid thing to say —”

(OotP, 450)

It's not that she meant to say anything to upset Harry, she just didn't think it through. Didn't think about what her words actually meant until Harry brought it up. And that's really what it is. They don't understand, not really. At least not at this point in the books.

The ones I don't really have an excuse for are some of the adults in the Order. I mean Lupin, Arthur, and Molly should know better. I mean, Lupin is allergic to responsibility, so, I understand why he doesn't try to help in any way. But Molly doesn't seem to understand either, Molly, who lost both her older brothers to Death Eaters. I think in Molly's case, is that she mastered the art of pushing any emotion she doesn't want to feel down and she doesn't understand why Harry is feeling things and not doing the same because she's sure everyone is like her in that regard. She is wrong.

Her reaction to the boggart in OotP is the result of how she doesn't seem to really process her negative emotions which, again, results in her having no clue what Harry's going through. Molly is a result of a culture that's very unaware of mental health and who never really dealt with her own issues and fears from the first war.

So, yeah, I think the responses we see to Harry's trauma from other characters are just very in line with wizards' understanding of mental health. Which is close to none.

[ma1dita]

🐥

okay I dont wanna seem annoying but it's 10:53pm and the ideas r coming in but I already sent an ask in so do whichever u want first 😭

bf!Luke when he's sick headcanons? (can be in an au where they're js normal ppl or can be them at camp, your choice !! 🫶🏼

🐥🐥🐥🐥🐥

a/n: LIVVVVV i truly believe that if this man was sick with an SO that would take care of him he would be the biggest bitch alive just because he can

at camp:

it starts with a sniffle, luke trying to be oh so brave about it until he can’t ignore the sneezes that sound like they could shake the earth and all of cabin 11 (if you think those kids barely got sleep in general, you should see them get mad at luke’s dumbass going ACHOO for the 47th time that night)

so they rightfully complain to you to go get your man and drag his ass to the infirmary, because the cabin counselor he is loves taking care of others but throws a fit when they tell him to get checked out by the apollo kids talking bout “i don’t get sick, i’m too cool to get sick! heroes don’t get—”

yeah so he has the flu

one stern look from you sends him packing towards the infirmary, dragging his feet in the dirt and complaining the whole way

he puts up a fight the whole time, swatting the healer’s hands away to the point they want to tie him to the bed, and luke doesn’t like not winning

“luke just listen to the fucking healer and you’ll be out of here faster.” “bedrest! they want me to be strapped down here forever, babe, you know i don’t like not moving for that long! though if you were the one tying me down…” *sniffles innocently*

a cold towel smacks him in the face

you end up nursing his nasty germ-riddled ass back to health in a corner of the infirmary that you have to make your own for the next week and a half. 

but if you ask him, he felt fine after a few days—he just likes being taken care of by you

im bored lets do modern hcs too:

in this universe he’s still a little shit but at least you two live together in a cute little city apartment

luke’s laid out on the couch wrapped up in some of your coziest throw blankets as he scrolls through old reruns of friends, laughing at chandler’s humor because i imagine it to be a lot like his own (of course, if rick let him be funny instead of traumatized and an antagonist)

you’re making chicken noodle soup in the kitchen and the smell wafts through the air of your apartment even if he’s so congested his voice sounds funny when he talks

i think you guys would have two cats, brother and sister—absolute menaces, pouncing on him in turns trying to resuscitate their dad from his lifeless form on the couch to throw their little mouse toy around

that or a really big senior dog who sleeps at his feet and turns its head every time luke makes a funny noise

oh he’s still annoying in this one trust—you gave him a little silver dinner bell to ring if he needs you since you’re working from home in the other room but the problem is this man always needs you

ring. “babe!’ ring. “baby!” ring ring. “love of my life, absolute goddess among—*wheeze* humans, can you come here a second?”

“what’s up, honey?” “oh i just needed to see your pretty face. feeling better already!” 

you toss a pillow at his head and get back to your meeting.

when it’s over though, you join him in his little blanket fortress and he lays on your chest, sniffling and smiling as he pulls you into a kiss and thanking you for existing

you get sick after but it’s worth it. sort of like payback

[spacelazarwolf]

i think you’re absolutely right about the cuntboys/make trans guys pregnant shit. it made me so uncomfortable too.

pregnancy has always been a giant fear of mine, and there are people out there who genuinely think forcing trans men to get pregnant will ‘fix’ us or some shit. like, sure, it’s fine to joke abt stuff that affects you, but that post didn’t read all that jokey to me tbh.

and the cuntboy thinf. seriously? that’s essentially just pushing us- (sorry can’t remember the right word for it lol) but it’s just pushing us down to labeling us by what we were born with and differentiating us from cis men

it's just blowing my fucking mind to watch them try to backtrack and claim it was "just joking about kinks between friends" because that is literally not what happened. they were talking specifically about a group of "cuntboys" they don't like, said that they should make those "cuntboys" they don't like "fat and pregnant" and then joked about making them "breeders." if they were joking about a kink between friends, they'd have made a separate post and used language that made it clear they were talking about themselves. they didn't though bc they were literally talking specifically about a group of people they don't like and specifically weaponizing a terrifying and traumatizing experience a lot of trans ppl who can get pregnant never ever want to experience.

and i put this in the tags of my other answer, but like. when roe v wade fell, i waited on the phone for 4 hours with the "women's health clinic", the only clinic in my area that took medicaid, to try to get an appointment to get sterilized and it took another two weeks just to get it confirmed. i remember the guy i was hooking up with texted me the day the news broke and asked if i wanted to stop hooking up because he knew how huge a fear pregnancy is for me. i had been trying to get sterilization surgery for years but kept getting sent away, and finally i had to just tell the doctor i had my appointment with "listen dude i am almost 30 i know what i want if i get pregnant and i can't get an abortion my only option will be to kill myself and i really want to fucking live so please give me this surgery." insurance ended up not even covering a hysterectomy so i had to opt for tubal removal. because even being on hormones and having a clear record of asking over and over again for sterilization wasn't enough to grant me bodily autonomy, i had to give them no other option. i got misgendered the entire time i was at the hospital and don't even remember how i got home because i was barely out of anesthesia and conscious when they loaded me in my sister's car.

a pregnancy is a death sentence for so many trans people. and for those that end up going through it, or even for those who want to go through it, pregnant trans people are treated horrifically. if your kid comes out with birth defects, you can be prosecuted for child endangerment because testosterone can cause birth defects.

you do not fucking make jokes like that about other people. and you do not turn around and tell the people you made rape/forced pregnancy jokes about that they're being too sensitive or that they're somehow making you uncomfortable for calling you out on your disgusting and misogynistic joke. this is not fucking 2016 reddit you do not have to be an edgelord to be accepted as one of the guys. making literal rape jokes is not protecting trans women. it's you being a misogynist. i am not changing my mind on this.

[glennquackmire]

WE NEED LORE FOR THE HUNGER GAMES AU !!!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶😛😛😛😛😛😞😞😞😞

OMG OMG OK SO

This was originally really long but I'll do a better version of it ok so (hi chat I'm re reading this now cos it's not like 2am and I'm realising how bad this is I'll re explain it soon I promise ☝️☝️) (me again this is so ass I keep getting like flashbacks to how corny this is I'm rewriting it all as we speak cause this is so bad AND ooc AUGHHHHHHHHGHGGF)

-the curtis bros live in district 12 and their parents died in a mining accident

-darry (he's 18 in this) and pony are reaped ik I just said he volunteers for soda but I'm editing this rn and I'm taking that out LMAOO (I had to make it any 2 because there just isn't enough girls in the outsiders for one girl one boy 😭)

-ponyboy believes darry genuinely despises him (WRONG) and thinks that darry is going to try kill him once they get in the arena so he spends most his time in there trying to get away from him

-meanwhile darry spends all his time trying to FIND ponyboy w his fancy career ally paul (I like to pretend he's an important character) he's from district 4 or WAS lolol get it cause he's dead

-the arena is foresty but its also got this really cliffy area that overlooks this huge body of water (that's important i swear)

-so the other ppl who are reaped are:

>dally and johnny from the lumber district: their main tactic is to stay together but that's more of a support thing because johnny is convinced he doesn't have a chance and dally is super confident bro is SWINGING that axe

>tim from the textile district: he had to leave curly and Angela to fend for themselves so he's DESPERATE to get home (post traumatic eldest sibling disorder)(ily tim)

>the careers marcia and randy (District 1) cherry and bob (District 2) Paul and ik there's other socs but I forget their names (District 4): their main tactic is to travel in groups of 2 and pick off the weakest tributes at first and then come together

>scouts here she's from the technology district hi scout

>oh and also Steve and twobit are also here LITERALLY just because I think they're a funny duo they do NOT last long I fear #divadown

-dally and johnny are also super codependant in this and if johnny were to (hypothetically) get murked by a tribute (hypothetically) dally would end up like he did in the book perchance idk they make me really sad these two are doomed in every universe

-eventually after most of the ppl are dead darry amd pony rerun into eachother and that's when ponyboy starts to realise darry does not infact want him dead and their beef is as good as over too bad it doesn't last lolol

-i wanted to add a reference to tge actual book to look smart into this so instead of their being those mutant dog mutts that chase them instead it's a HUGE fire that burns the entire arena and pushes them to the top of the cliff and when it gets down to the final 2 darry willingly steps into it so ponyboy can live which ik that's kinda corny but anyway

-I have a whole storyline in my mind for each of the characters if anyone wants to hear more tell me NEOW

[phffuntimes]

My dear Sheila E...

Sheila E has been done insanely dirty in phf in SO many ways (stripping her off her agency as a character during the final fight and using her just to MotivateTM Fugo is misogynistic writing 101), but I’m the most sad by the fact we get to the climax of her arc and then don’t get to see the aftermath.

She starts off as someone who’s so lost on what to do with her life after her sole goal has been taken away and fulfilled by someone else and she’s spent about a third of her life stuck in about the most traumatic, dehumanizing environment possible, that she rationalizes it in her brain that following the person who managed to fulfill her life mission (Giorno) for her is a sound decision (I think it’s in big part due to her guilt over how she handled the loss of her sister but perhaps i'll make a separate post on that in the future). She finds it easier to logically pick a respectable person to follow and then mindlessly follow them to the T than to constantly drown in uncertainty and the distrust she harbors deep in her heart. I think her latching onto Giorno so much was in part personal (him avenging her sister) but also reasonable (her seeing him as someone with noble, right goals whom she won’t regret committing to). It all makes sense in her head.

Now comes the part where I have to talk about Fugo, since I believe he’s THE most crucial person involved in her development. There are two layers to this: 1. him being involved in killing Illuso, 2. him as a person.

I’ll address the latter first to illustrate my point better: I think in Sheila’s eyes, dangerous stand aside, Fugo is the epitome of harmless. One of the most unimpressive people she’s ever met, and also quite possibly the first person in a while that has NO authority or upper hand over her, plus being around the same age, even further highlighting how he has nothing on her. (I could go on and on about these two and how this is an AMAZING basis for a friendship, but I’ll save that for some other time as well).

Now back to how this relates to him killing Illuso… Well, by Sheila’s rules, it would make sense to surrender herself to Fugo as well, since she did that to Giorno who arguably did less work in the ACTUAL killing. But… that’s stupid. Fugo is undeserving of that. What’s more important, she realizes he was the one who killed Illuso very shortly after realizing her loyalty to Giorno is crumbling, because she’s confronted with the fact she may have chosen the wrong person to follow, extended to this strategy being invalid to live by. And she doesn’t know how else to live – her worldviews she stuck to so strictly are shattered and both her and Fugo are fucked in terms of the mission, without any plan.

I think her confronting him in the car and confessing to what’s going on with her is her form of admitting that there may have been a connection (i do NOT mean this in a romantic sense, i mean it as Sheila being INSANELY lonely throughout the years and Fugo being the first person her age who somewhat fit the criteria of a Safe enough person to perhaps befriend, all of that being subconscious on her part, of course) and her kicking him out being a gift of sorts, because she’s about to recklessly try to ram into Volpe and see what happens. She doesn’t care she might die at that moment, so LOST about everything with no light to guide her that it just doesn’t matter. Might as well try to take this guy out with zero regard for her own safety.

And Fugo coming to save her in turn must’ve solidified the sense of comradery and even further disturb her beliefs on ppl. After this point she’s at the BIGGEST crossroads of her life, because there’s many doors open for her learning how to LiveTM and get better, but we don’t get to see any of that. It’s a great shame.

[inamagicalhallucination]

okay two versions of mafia dazai x ada kunikida + their adopted son atsushi

one

dark era

ok this would probably end up being an accidental fix it but um anyway

picture this, dark era dazai wandering around thinking up a new way to commit suicide

kunikida on his way back to the ada office after a mission

and atsushi who has managed to escape the orphanage and now is wandering in a new town

atsushi meets dazai while dazai's trying to drown himself like in canon

atsushi meets kunikida who notices a small starving kid drag someone out the river and immediately rushes to help

at this point kuni and dazai dont know each other

anyway

kunikida takes atsushi to eat and the drowning man is also there; they talk; atsushi is sweet

dazai's like "starving child do u wanna come with me" while kunikida is also inviting him to come w/ him to find a place to stay

now u might think why would dazai do this well idk something about a small child starving and exhausted but still finding in himself to help a stranger even tho itll leave him wet and cold was so surprising he didnt know what to do

and kunikida is just... kunikida and idk he's a nice guy

anyway

dazai and kunikida both argue atsushi should come with them and dazais like this guys probably right but its funny to see him riled up

anyway so theyre like okay whatever atsushi wut do u want

and atsushi, sweet tiny traumatized atsushi, doesn't wanna upset these ppl who seem so nice so he says both

and so the custody agreement starts

at first dazai doesn't tell anyone about atsushi becuz um who would want to admit they adopted a child to rile up a hot blond but

eventually as dazai and kunikida grow close to atsushi and to each other they find out about their jobs

kunikida is not happy about letting his son (whos only 4 years younger than him) live with mafia ppl around and makes dazai swear to protect him and dazais like okay fine ig

anyway

the only ppl who know atsushi in the mafia are oda and ango becuz um besties

chuuya knows somethings up but he hasnt quite figured it out

akutagawa has met atsushi but he doesn't know about atsushi and dazai

he does know this sweet kid who always greets him with a smile is under shared custody over two guys his brother who call themselves his dad but ya

atsushi isnt hiding it he's just shy around his first ever crush

anyway

atsushi loves the ada and fully wants to join but he also loves dazai but he has no desire to be with the mafia sense dazai has never let him meet anyone in the mafia while theyre on the clock if that makes sense

so essentially as my tags of the last post said

atsushi is the child of divorce that has to constantly move in between homes

but his parents are four years older than him

and not divorced becuz they arent even dating yet

and also he's accidentally the reason theyll ever get together

and also his homes r two rival organizations

anyway the fix it part comes from dazai having his in law family to help out when mimic comes but do with that what u will

and also same concept but theyre all older

[nicki0kaye]

random Kallus hc inspired by someone else's post #2

man he's gotta hate that he lost his bo-rifle to fucking Thrawn

like so the moral of the Honorable Ones to me was Kallus realizing he has nothing of value in his life--he has TWO personal items to his name; this fuckin glow rock and his bo-rifle which he has just learned is his by right. Regardless of what he did to Lasan, regardless of all the awful reasons he should never be accepted by any of his enemies, that fucking bo-rifle is his and no Honor Guard of Lasan can argue otherwise. There are a lot of reasons he turns on the Empire, but this is where it starts. The realization his life is so small and so empty, and he just limped back to it. Why? Why is this life worth living? And with more research, it stops being a selfish desire to ditch and becomes an informed hatred of the Empire, BUT

lets go back to that kernel of rebellion. Kallus' life is small and empty. He's got a Rock and Bo-Rifle. That's all that defines him outside his identity as a ISB officer.

He just acquired the Rock. He's been living with bo-rifle as his single defining trait for maybe a decade at this point. It's an extension of his beef with Lasat in general, which started on Onderon when one blew up his first Big Boy Mission. It makes sense he'd fixate on such a traumatic event but it's not JUST that. You don't get to have personal hobbies or a sense of fashion or really any kind of identity within the Empire outside who you personally want to fuck up. Kallus chose the Lasat and got fucking spiteful about it, which led him to the Siege of Lasan, where he won his bo-rifle.

but like, it's more than that. It isn't just hatred--if it were, I don't think Zeb would have gotten to him. I think that Kallus has had a buried respect for the Lasat for a long time, if only because of how much time and effort it took to win and then become proficient with the bo-rifle. Then there's the layer of it being the only true outlet for identity he's allowed. THEN there's the fact the bo-rifles are a Force weapon. They've got kyber crystals inside them. And I personally subscribe to the idea that everyone can sense the Force, thus be guided by the Force, it's just that not everyone can recognize what is intuition/one's own emotions and what is the Force, nevermind having an ability to influence other shit with the Force.

What I'm trying to say is I wanna believe Kallus bonded with his bo-rifle in a cosmic way. He is the Warrior, hunting the future; the Force always had plans for his ass and saw that a Force-conductive weapon made its way into his hands, that he then spent years becoming deadly with. That fucking weapon is connected to his soul.

and he lost it to Thrawn.

Thrawn didn't beat him in a fight while Kallus was armed with his bo-rifle, but he super beat his ass in a fight. Even if Kallus could argue he didn't earn the bo-rifle, Kallus couldn't retrieve it before having to gtfo. It's still somewhere on Thrawn's stupid ship--my assumption is that Thrawn goes and adds it to his collection of stolen artwork.

Regardless, Kallus doesn't have it anymore. This thing he poured what little identity he was allowed to maintain, years of hard work and practice and countless battles where he relied on it to keep him alive as his primary weapon, nevermind a Force connection, anyone would become attached to a weapon after years of service. This reminder of Lasan, this piece of history, its fucking gone now.

I don't think he'd think he's allowed to mourn that, considering all he's done, but you can't logic away your feelings, and now he's with a group of ppl who actively find that kind of coping pretty fucking unhealthy. At some point he's gonna have to process what that weapon meant to him and its not gonna be pretty.

imo, he gets a tat of it on the forearm of his dominant hand. He'd think about it for a long time but only go through with it after finally discussing all his mixed up feelings with Zeb, who would super approve of him paying his respects to a sacred fuckin weapon this way. It was his, by right, by soul, by will of the Ashla.

[starshapedjello]

Can you PLEASE help try and understand why I find it so hard to tell if my collegue likes me? He's told me he isn't the one to chase a women and that he would wait for someone who meets his standards to go for him. There's this flirtiness between us and have deep conversations, but I just dont wanna make the first move without more signs..He's a Scorpio Sun, Capricorn Venus, Libra Mars. Help me understand some signs if I should go for it. Im personally a Aries sun, Taurus Venus and Scorpio Mars

You know, that’s really tough.

It’s the ol’ Aries in love with the Scorpio.

I’m an Aries and I was once in love with a Scorpio. We slept around a bunch, but he never relationshipped me, which is what I wanted!

In the end, it was very traumatic.

In synastry, Aries make a Quincunx aspect with Scorpio. It’s when 2 planets are 150degrees apart.

Here is a quote from online:

//“Here’s what makes Quincunxs challenging aspects: “Quincunx have nothing in common, like two irreconcilable notions,” says DeFranco. //

I do think Quincunx is a very hot 🥵 aspect, but it seems like the signs can barely understand each other.

Aries is DIRECT energy. Scorpio is INDIRECT energy. What they have in common is that they’re both ruled by MARS. 🔥 (but Scorpio is also ruled by Pluto in modern astrology)

The only advice I can give you is to tell you about the mistakes I made in my situationship with a Scorpio, since I have never successfully dated one:

1. Don’t insult them. Aries can get this way sometimes. We are hot headed and impatient and we want what we want. And sometimes we do it just to flirt or seem funny. Insults roll off us, so why not them? It will not roll off them. They will hold onto it for eternity. That’s the Pluto in them.

2. Don’t sleep with them. Scorpios are s3xy individuals and they know this. But s3x isn’t what they’re after — they’re looking for a deeper connection. They want soul mate energy. S3x is nothing to them compared to MAKING LOVE! They want to bare their all to someone. They want to feel HELD and CHERISHED. They understand the difference of “just s3x” and they think it’s cheap, even though they indulge in it constantly (double standards). They want to be with someone that they can see themselves starting a family with, so they’re not looking for a loose woman. They test people.

3. Above all else: Be their friend first. You can’t force someone to love you, tragically. But you do have the control to be someone’s friend. Scorpios are terribly misunderstood and more than anything they want that friend they can talk to anything about. Be patient. Give them their space. Go on a nature walk with them. (Pretty sure they enjoy quiet areas with nature). Invite them to hang out and do peaceful things together (since they’re a water sign, they are very sensitive to energies and can’t be around too many ppl for too long). They like to pretend they’re tough, but they’re soft. Way more soft than an Aries can even admit to be.

4. Be vulnerable with them. This is a very challenging thing for an Aries to do — being vulnerable. We spend our whole lives pretending we are TOUGH AS NAILS AND NO ONE CAN HURT US. But we are the babies of the zodiac (the first sign) and we aren’t as tough as we like to think we are. If you have known this guy a long time and are dying to tell him how you feel — just do it! But be completely honest. No jokes to lighten the mood. No insults to seem more macho. Just be vulnerable. Put yourself out there, even if he might break and shatter your heart. Do it anyway. This is the only way to a Scorpios heart. They need to know if you’re just as soft as they are. That makes them feel safe.

[faceeeeee]

All

I love hearing about ppls Ocs :3

Behold- the main cast of assholes and dumbasses! I finally remade their reference sheets (keep in mind that these guys are part of the main cast so I've still got some other ocs, some plot relevant, others not so much)

To keep it brief, here's a summary (plot twist, I did not keep it brief):

In a hypothetical reconstruction of the earth where there is a huge ass continent and some other medium and small ones in a secluded corner, you've got regular human civilization living out their regular life in these small portions of land . All of the territory (except for the big ass continent) is controlled managed by a company known as "P.C.P" (Provide, create, protect. Creative, I know) which is basically the puppeteer of all of society. It's presented as the one that will install order and peace throughout the world by keeping every single little thing in check. They've got tech, they've got the military, they've got the most renowned scientist in the fields of chemistry, biology, physics...you name it...and they've got political control. The C.E.O of this wonderful company is our dear old gal Evelyn! She rose to the ranks cause of....plot reasons (dunno if that would be considered spoilers...) and is the reason all of this shit happens in the first place :) well... it's a mix really of who's at fault (get it? Cause the name of the series is "At fault"?..... I'll see myself out).

Aaanyway, then enters John, a middle-aged man that works in the robotics department of the company that has successfully ascended and has gotten a bonus! How nice :) well he fucks up on day one by stumbling upon some of the companies secrets regarding the big ass continent and is subsequently found out. How does Evelyn react to this? She kills his wife and young daughter OOPSIES. she also sent her workers/police forces to kill him as well but he escapes. Still in shock he hides on a garbage ship in the hopes of getting anywhere else besides P.C.P territory and it basically dumps him into the big ass continent. He wakes up and discovers that the big ass continent has a huge abandoned city filled with vegetation and wacky mutated creatures with varying levels of danger :). Here enter our two other guys: BRK9 or "Berry" is the huge robot dude that was basically abandoned in this unknown territory and is later found and fixed by John to act as his security guard (John is basically preeeetty paranoid at this point and is still in shock and has not registered that his only family's dead). And what do we have here? Berry's sentient and is really fucking annoying to John? Oopsie daisy! Welp, now these two wander around the place and find an annoying fucking furry K!!! (Yes K. Her name is a literal letter don't say anything SHUT UP-). When they first met she basically tried to eat John and kill berry but berry ends up decapitating her.......

But, to John's dismay, K's inmortal!....kinda. She can regenerate any part of her body but she can die of old age or you could just blow her up till there's no piece of flesh left for her to regenerate from. So their whole dynamic is basically grumpy old traumatized man who now wants revenge, an insecure robot that masks their fears with a confident front and is obsessed with his dad (John hates that he calls him that) and a psychotic anthropomorphic lizard that's really fkn stupid and barbaric.

And to answer "What was Evelyn trying to hide?"... she's basically the reason that K exists in the first place and is trying to take control of this deserted continent by sending more and more troops to take over. What's stopping her? The vast amount of mutated things that are constantly killing her troops + K (she actually created K in the hopes of using her as a weapon to conquer the place but deemed her as a nuisance and useless and left her to die. But she escaped and got amnesia by destroying her head whilst escaping...)

And above all of this, whilst our main trio kill one of the troops and ambush their station, through a video call with one of the generals, Evelyn sees that the ex-employee that she thought had been taken care of was still alive! AND THE THING THAT SHE HAD GOTTEN RID OF WAS ALSO ALIVE AND KICKING! oh and a random robot.....

[akria23]

Suspect / Character Chart Update:

Nobody:

So this week’s episode moved us off the path of Nuth as he claimed that Nant committed suicide - including some possible flashbacks of the body. This moves my Nobody theory - specifically Nobody: Theory A into sus rank 1.

Do I believe that Nant committed suicide tho? No I’m not convinced yet. I do think he’d have a lot of reasons for suicide - which I pointed out the first time I posted - but there’s so many questions left with that option. Where’s the body? Did nuth hide it? Why? What about a suicide note - not everyone leaves one but it seems strange of Nant in particular to not want to get out to his brother what he’d never been able to say while living.

I do think this does move up other aspects of the Nobody theory tho - they confirmed debt collectors so maybe Nant faked his death & went into hiding, or they harmed him. We still have the possibility of psychological break & Nont and Nant being the same person who just suffered a traumatic experience or drug usage that caused a break in his psyche - I still don’t want this the most but I can see it being this cause it is the safer route to end us off with.

Nuth:

Nuth has moved down in the ranks to the number 2 spot. Hes not lower because while he claims that Nant ruined his life and committed suicide all of his flashbacks of Nant so far hasn’t shown Nant be violent or harmful towards him. He’s pictured supportive, sexualized, and a hurt Nant. That’s not to say Nant couldn’t have harmed him or even made his life worse - it’s just a possibility that Nuth isn’t a reliable source even his flashbacks. We’ve seen him have hallucinations so it’s difficult to say what he recalls or sees as 100 proof of things happening or have happened.

Also…did they ever tell us what the bloody hand print was from… If Nant was selling drugs to pay his debt is it the same ppl Nuth is selling for? Theres also these lines or cages placed over Nuth sometimes and I’m not sure if it’s metaphor for criminality or a metaphor for how trapped he feels. There’s still one of two threads they can pull and circle back around to it being Nuth so he stays on the list.

Prom:

It’s still all vibes no evidence. He doesn’t slip, he doesn’t miss. He’s almost the perfect specimen partner wise in the sense that he has an ability to read Nont in a way no other does. He’s not overbearing, or controlling. He doesn’t try to change Nont’s mind after boundaries are set. Anything Nont says he needs or wants, Prom goes along with - an active supporter (plotting, research, giving him the weapon). But that’s the thing, Nont is more honest with him than he is with any other characters - and he has to see the frayed edges but he doesn’t pull Nont back at all. He enables…he’s supporting his descent.

The question I’m lost on is why. Maybe it’s empathy, relatability- I too am sadistic in my way, I too have rage, I wanna kill someone - and because he’s so good at repressing he admires & desires Nont who doesn’t repress who just acts and reacts. And this is what makes them revenge lovers.

But there’s still always that niggle at my brain that reminds me that Prom inserted himself and then had had influence over the case ever since. The show is always highlighting something off when Prom is in the mix - the music change, the aesthetic of the room, the way they position his def in scenes at the Playboyy with Aob & Puen (which I’m sure is to show us how he’s a source that benefits from the competing nature). He still feels like an invisible hand, still feels like he’s playing chess and seeing moves ahead of his lover. There’s so much mystery surrounding him still that’s it’s difficult to move him off the suspect board.

Porsche:

I still can’t tie Porsche into his death so he stays at number 4 ranking but I still wonder if his sugar daddy had anything to do with Nant that would’ve set them into a competitive nature for his resources and therefore enemies…that’s my mind working theories from what the story has given us thus far tho.

[gatheringbones]

genuine question: how do you stand the loneliness? i'm in my mid 20s and ive never been loved in a way that didnt hurt. i dont want to have to run after ppl begging for the smallest scrap of affection anymore but i keep turning up ppl who, even though they are interested in me and seem generally decent, arent ready to lower their walls and let me in, so its either that or nothing, and im so fucking lonely. i try to bury myself in work and going out as much as i can, but sometimes it hits me, and i dont know how to stand it anymore. i just want to be able to be kind to someone and treat them with all the love and affection i have, and not have to guard myself at the same time or be afraid of them or feel like i can never be sure with them. i think you've been lonely like that for a long time, too, and i dont have anyone who understands. i know the only advice you can give is probably "endure and continue to have self respect", but i dont know how to do that without also becoming small, and sad, and worn out from all the loneliness. if there's anything you can think of that helped you get through it, please tell me--i dont want to burden or overwhelm you, but i dont know what to do anymore, and like i said, you seem like you've survived a couple of those sorts of droughts and i dont have anyone else to talk to about this

so on those first few early dates with c when she was either driving an hour up north or I was taking the bus two hours down to see her, I was so rattled by the experience of building intimacy with someone else that I couldn’t really think of what we ought to do with each other on our dates. In the end I decided: we would just do what I ordinarily did to build intimacy with myself, which meant taking lots of long walks all over residential seattle. and I’d been living there for over ten years at that point, getting around either by walking or by bus. before that I’d lived in the sticks. before that I’d lived in the part of the sticks that wasn’t connected to the power grid. my earliest memories are long lonely walks. long lonely walks were my primary coping mechanism for debilitating post traumatic stress and survivor’s guilt. and with c it was wild because. it was exactly like going on these walks with myself, only I was more of myself and these walks were more of what they were. what’s more the internal map of the city I had built in my feet over a decade was suddenly of use. all of the time and neurons I had put into building it were relevant to the present situation.

i packed a backpack once. water and a cheeseboard with a little cheese knife and a can of prosecco and a can of kirin for c and lots of little cheeses and salamis and fruits and veggies and chocolate almonds. And I took c on a long meandering walk that I knew from memory; fremont to the crown hill cemetery to the stairs leading down to golden gardens to the beach at sunset. all places I’d been by myself and taken my friends to before. places I’d taken myself to after packing myself a snack and bringing my journal and quite literally staring across the water at a home that would kill me if I ever returned to it. all that time mattered. the time I had spent in that place making those friendships and mourning that life and building that intimacy with myself and the city mattered.

All the years before��� giving, giving, gifts to those who could not care, would not give back. How well we made a feast together. Those years of waste were over.

[kdramaxoxo]

hihi!! i wanna ask for a list of dramas with a lead whos cold, mysterious, haunted by a troubled past, secretive, prolly has a vocabulary of like 10 words. but is super soft on the inside, like they push ppl away cus theyre afraid of hurting them or being abandoned or smthn like that. ik this is hyper specific so sryyy if its hard to answer, but all my fave characters fit this bill so wanted to kno if u have any kdrama that can give me this high (⁠｡⁠•̀⁠ᴗ⁠-⁠)⁠✧ thxxx!! ♡

p.s. it doesnt have to b exxxactly this but if it fits a few of the categories, ill be happi! ♡♡

We LOVE mysterious haunted trauma babies over here so thank you for this ask. (also this might be one of my favorite lists ever??)

K-Dramas leads with cold personalities/mysterious past, secretive trauma pups...morally grey a plus

The Smile has left your eyes - Kim Moo-Young Aside from this k-drama being a masterpiece that’ll leave you a pile of tears, Seo in Guk as Kim Moo-Young is the perfect example of a morally grey character you will fall in love with. He’s involved in a murder plot line, uses women to get what he wants and is clearly hiding something. You’ll try to resist being interested in him sure, but you’ll fail.

Beyond Evil - both leads This is a passionate unrequited romance crime drama about two detectives that are paired up to solve a crime in a small town. Everyone is really messed up and that's what makes this drama super good! Scary, haunted and super well written.

Tale of the Nine Tailed 1938 - Lee Rang Lee Rang is one of my favorite trauma pup blorbo from my shows! This drama is the second season of the fantasy drama Tale of the Nine Tailed. I recommend you watch both but season two was my favorite because it focused on Lee Rang. You will LOVE HIM! MUST PROTEC.

Alice The Final Weapon - Gyeo Wool Finally a GIRL with a traumatic past and the boy who loves her!! Actually everyone in this drama is messed up and dealing with horrific things. It's a very short and creative little drama and despite the gore, I really fell for the mains! They are blorbo from my shows!

See You In My 19th Life (both leads) This drama featuring a woman who can remember her past lives was one of my favorites this year! Both leads are tackling the trauma of the FL's death and there is a lot of healing that has to happen. Shin Hye Sun is a goddess!

The Eighth Sense - Jae Won A queer kdrama about two leads that meet surfing and fall in love. This drama is my favorite "bl" k-drama ever and the lead definitely has a traumatic past he's in therapy for. I highly recommend this one!

Flower of Evil - Hyun Soo: A psychological thriller centered around a jewelry maker who is running from his past, and his cop wife (power couple alert!)  who doesn’t know his original identity. The chemistry of the couple is amazing and all of the characters are nuanced and interesting. I was on the edge of my seat, AND sobbing! Also, I finally understand Lee Jun Ki stans, he was SO GOOD in this! A total trauma pup you won't believe it.

Doom at Your Service: Doom A girl is diagnosed with cancer and a morally grey god grants her wish to live 100 more days the way she wants to live. While I didn't LOVE this drama, the romance is amazing - that KISS! Doom is the perfect damaged god with a chip on his shoulder.

Hello Monster - Lee Hyun and His Brother Jung Sun-Ho Featuring two brothers who have a murderous backstory, both are morally grey. Sure one is definitely “worse” than the other when it comes to being a murder baby but let’s face it - they both have their problems (sorry, didn’t want to post any spoilers so that’s all I can say about that!)

The Crowned Clown: Ha-seon The King The contrast between the good guy and the bad guy in this historical drama are so interesting to watch because one brilliant actor (Yeo Jin Goo) plays the same character. The king is insane and a murderer. He’s terrible in every way with literally no way to be redeemed but you’ll still feel for him…just watch.

My Liberation Notes - Mr. Gu This slice of life takes place mostly in a small town where siblings who really don't want to be there, live. Mr. Gu is renting one of the buildings and he's extremely burdened and and keeps to himself. I personally didn't ship him with the lead but he's definitely the type you're asking for!

Scarlet Heart Ryeo: Wang Soo Scarlet heart will destroy you, but you’ll also find yourself deeply empathetic to (and totally in love with) the most toxic of princes: Wang Soo. Cast out by his relatives, and treated like an animal he’s deeply wounded and despite knowing in your heart that he’s done terrible things, you’ll find yourself making excuses for him and imagining him as your boyfriend (wait…can you ignore that last sentence?)

Summer Strike - Both leads This slice of life has a quiet and thoughtful male lead who is traumatized by the murder of his sibling. I was a little disappointed in the ending but overall the show's mains were so soft and lovely.

Just Between Lovers - Both leads but. Kang Doo! I'm sure you knew I'd put this on the list but kang doo is my favorite trauma baby of all time. Slice of Life romance between poor pups just trying to live! The OTP is one of my favorite couples EVER and even as the years go on, very few couples have matched their love in my opinion. There’s a lot of comfort/healing themes with for me is just *chef’s kiss.* Lee Junho became my bias wrecker because of that drama.

Psycho But It’s Okay - Everyone A gorgeous k-drama using fairytale narrations as a backdrop, features two brothers who lost their mother, and a beautiful & famous author who grew up in a traumatic and abusive household. Everyone is very closed off and holding onto intense pain, but the three come together to help one another move on and find happiness. Gorgeous angsty and melodramatic romance.

Thirty But Seventeen - Woo Jin Precious puppies with past trauma! The main has basically stopped living his life because of his past. Don’t be turned off by the shows description as it turned out to be one of the best surprises of 2018 for me. The leads are lovely and everyone relies and supports one another - it’s so sweet.

Come and Hug Me - Do Jin This thriller is not for the faint of heart but the main theme is healing. Two friends are torn apart when the boy’s dad kills the girls entire family. Later in life, they find one another and walk on the path to healing while still being tormented by their past. It also focuses on the trauma and manipulation the killer has on the whole family, making the show beautiful, terrifying and heartbreaking at the same time. 

Goblin: Grim Reaper Most of you have watched this drama but I’ll try hard not to spoil it. The Grim Reaper is such a hilarious character in the current time line but in order to be a Grim Reaper, you have to have done something “bad” to become one. His pain is deep and cutting and you’ll want to protect him.

It’s Okay that’s love: Jang Jae-yeol This is one of those cold male leads that you’ll just end up liking even though he’s kinda the worst in that “Pickup Artist” type of way? I had this show listed in my top 10 but then I recently watched it again and realized I’ve made progress in my “don’t like jerks who display jerk behavior” because he’s kinda an ass. You’ll soften for him when the plot moves along for sure, but he’s aggressive and says really sexist things sometimes (as does most of the male characters honestly - i really need to remove this from my top 10)…

Enjoy!

[sun-stricken]

Man I am so happy I found your blog. Like it’s so refreshing to see a gray blog about, well, GRAY. Anyways id love to hear some more of your headcanons about gray, maybe ones on his demon slayer traits as well. If that’s ok with of course😅.

if u like my blog u should see my notes app, its almost embarrassing how full of him it is

i struggled with this ngl, single character (even when its ur fav) hc list r weirdly difficult for me

BUT I DID IT SO ENJOY!

Grays has a scarily good memory, he can see something once and be able to recall it in almost perfect detail even years later

amazing for molding, horrible for embarrassing or traumatic memories though

If someone needs something done, they go to him

He has a lot of people that owe him favors on standby, and no he will not say how those favor came to exist

he has a patch of natural white hair in his bangs, he got it from his mothers side

He has a brown cat named Catnip

shes his pride and joy

he has boxes full of letters, notes, and cards people have given him since joining Fairy Tail.

He’s really good at talking himself out of situations, as someone else said, hes a bit of a diplomat

if theres a fight or job that requires no magic hes one of the best for it

Some call it gaslighting, i call it being a lawyer in another life

Grays like, terrifyingly smart, he knows what to say, when to say it, and how

if other guilds/maybe the council did scouting, hes at the top of the list

nobody wants him as an enemy

ESPECIALLY after he got his devil slayer magic

speaking of

devil slayers are the embodiment of cute aggression

he gets the random urge to bite people

theres an 80% chance that he’ll try to head-bunt people now

if he gets too happy he’ll try to throw smth

he has ‘fangs’, really sharp canines and he probably has a self-induced tongue piercing from how many times he bit his tongue from them

the tips of his fingers are black, whether thats a demon slayer trait, or a product of having two ice magics, which makes him work in prime frostbite temperatures, is unknown, they just are

Gray collects siblings the way Natsu collects father figures

He also has a larger male following than Erza, but its okay bc she has a higher female following than him :)

he wears eyeliner. i just. i need to say it.

i want to add smth thats in every fairy tail au i make but never explicitly stated

hes deaf, he was born hoh but its gotten worse over the years, especially after Deloria

he has lacrima hearing aids and will turn them off if someone is being particularly annoying and he just isnt in the mood

he stress cooks and has gotten pretty good at it

he has a recipe book full of Isvan style foods and those are his favorite to make

He realized hes lived in Magnolia longer than he ever lived in Isvan and it tore him apart

When he writes things down, its a mix of Fioren and Islavic/Isvani writing

when he gets tired or really stressed he speaks his native language without realizing

hes a secret theater kid

hes the type to hear a song and lie on the floor for a couple hours

he tries to say he doesnt, but my god does he live off drama

he flirts when hes nervous bc its a very fun image to me

a weird amount of ppl hes dated/friends with were his enemy/rival in a sense

THATS ALL TY FOR THE ASK SORRY ITS KINDA SHORT AND ALL OVER THE PLACE

[romionarry]

much to think about… harry being scared to upset the balance in their friend group .. him being just as scared of the scenario where ron and hermione fight each other as he is of the scenario where they shut harry out …. this is all normal for a friend group but it gets an extra dimension of desperation in harry’s case because harry has attachment issues from his traumatic childhood and these are the only two ppl on EARTH he has managed to get this close to. no one else shares the privilege of knowing this much about harry and his vulnerabilities and his inner world …. the same is true the other way around, he knows more about them than he knows about anyone else. they’ve chosen to be in each other’s company for years on end now and have all but laid down their lives for each other. like i won’t lie i don’t think that harry could ever allow anyone else to get this close.

like ..ginny is so cool but not even she was there throughout all of it, the trust the golden trio have was built on years of close proximity, a shared daily life, shared secrets, shared life-threatening situations… i might expand on this later but i genuinely think everyone else kinda missed the window of time that held most of the circumstances that create the opportunity for a bond as deep as theirs. i dont think ginny could ever know him as intimately as his best friends do bc frankly ron and hermione are the only ones who went through enough with harry at the right time for him to allow such a close bond with them…. ginny will compensate for this by never even trying to obtain the emotional closeness that cho demanded, the emotional closeness that pushed harry away from cho, and this is how harry can bear to be with ginny without immediately pushing her away (that and ginny’s obviously just fun to be around + attractive). but the moment the harry/ginny relationship reaches a more serious stage i think harry’s attachment issues or ginny’s reluctance to even demand that emotional intimacy from him will cause problems… how can they ever know each other the way lovers should? where will harry get the closeness he desperately craves despite not being able to bear it from most ppl except ron and hermione? where will ginny get the closeness she deserves from a lover? i think at some point ginny and harry will realise they can never fully give each other what they need… the harry/ginny relationship is doomed to remain superficial

anyway i got off track LMAO. back to the scene above. much to think about indeed

[bottomspock]

PLS share anything + everything abt the 1940s Fitzjames living with the Franklins au I'm so intrigued ,,, why is she living with them ,,, , what's going on !!! That art is so beautiful I must know more !!!

friend's mind cooked this up 🫡

basically it’s the 40s, post ww2. jfj was an raf pilot during the war, real heroic stuff.. his aunt and uncle (adoptive parents) both died while he was deployed. he’s traumatized and drifting — he’s inherited a ton of money but insists his (adoptive) brother keeps it. brother and his wife keep it safe and keep reaching out and trying to help but all they get is “all’s well!”..... there’s this venerable older couple, the franklins — rich, upstanding in the community. he’d met them at official awards functions — they’re involved in government. through a lot of veiled talk and bizarre negotiations, he finds himself in this position where he’s their housegirlboy — he’s a kept thing, spoiled, does “housework,” and is an bizarre extremely psychologically kinky relationship with them. is a girl in the privacy of their home, gets birched for misbehavior, jane sits by and directs her on how best to pleasure her husband.... (obviously a variety of horny scenarios here. lots of psychologically kinky sex, punishments, discipline, Gender Times...the works) james starts taking a few too many liberties (leaving and returning to the house from a certain kind of establishment dressed as a woman, where anybody could see her coming and going from their house and ask questions)... they punish her very harshly, maybe beyond the line of kinkiness, remind her that she’s a boy. she decides to take her leave. takes basically nothing, leaves the house without them knowing as a girl, her life is already a shambles so she’ll steal a car or whatever.... going up and down a street, checking car doors. here’s one that’s unlocked. she gets in, starts trying to figure out how to start it without the key, but what luck! the key is here! she starts the car, and francis rawdon moira crozier rises from the back seat of his car, where he’s been napping. James Screams

francis rawdon moira crozier is a middle aged irish alcoholic whose life has slowly but surely been falling apart. he was a decorated naval intelligence officer in the war, although neither that nor his NORTHERN irishness stops ppl deriding him for irish neutrality in the war. he was a university professor. he met the franklins at an official event with their niece. they start a passionate relationship, she can’t be with him seriously bc of their class and nationality differences and her family’s disapproval. his alcoholism gets worse, he leaves the university, he’s basically scraping by on shitty odd jobs while he drinks himself to death

he’s not about to let this thief leave. nor is he about to turn her in or hurt her. confronts her, can see there’s something wrong, somehow gets to the point of well you can crash at my place, no strings, or i’ll call the police. so she does, they’re sniping at each other all the while the next day francis gets summoned by sophia’s shithead uncle and aunt of all people. sophia had mentioned to them in passing that one of the shitty odd jobs francis is scraping by on is PI work. they need his help with a sensitive matter that would reflect poorly on the whole family (read: sophia). say very meaningfully, deliberately, that there is a pair of Twins who they’ve employed in their household, a Boy and a Girl. Identical. these Two became unstable and resentful recently and left with some valuables of theirs. they’re worried for them. they show francis a picture, and it’s the car thief

he doesn’t accept the job but he also doesn’t turn them down — wants a little time before they realize they need to hire someone else. he heads home, jfj is gone. he checks the first place (a club) the franklins said she might be found and there she is. aaaand the rest is ¯\_(ツ)_/¯