#Twig loves puns

[sincerely-sofie]

In which Twig commits the unforgivable crime of wordplay

[thr4shit]

Fucking horrifying /pos

Thank you for this internal vision.

I am glad to know he is the eyeball man. :'D

I have a curiosity,

Does Jay have any vampire-y traits (ie. sharp teefs, claws of any sort, etc.) like Alex does? Or does he just have his FREAKY ASS EYES.

( no hate to you or your designs *I hope it doesn't come off that way*, I LOVE them and your art in general. I am just now realizing "god those stare into my soul-" the more you draw him. haha- I love his freaky ass eyes. :D they just mildly terrify me!! :'D )

Externally, he just has the freaky ass eyes. He has incredibly keen vision, dark or light, and if you make eye contact he has the ability to compel you or read your mind.

Internally, his organs are all withered up like Alex's and the inside of his skull is lined with even more freaky ass eyes. Rows upon rows and layers upon layers of freaky ass eyes.

[fbfh]

curiosity is a wonderful thing - ch. 9

wc: 3.2k

genre: slow burn, little angst, childhood best friends to lovers

pairing: slow burn bff!ben x fem daughter of alice!reader, previously audrey x ben, mal x ben???? apparently????

warnings: emotional damage!!! unusual behavior from ben, reader has a lil mini breakdown, reader is a just a tad autistic coded and has kind of a meltdown??? could also be read as emotional distress so interpret how you will

summary: ben gets weird during a tourney game and your gut is telling you something you probably shouldn't ignore.

song recs: twisted - aviva, cradles - sub urban, rabbit heart - florance and the machine, heads will roll - yeah yeah yeahs

a/n: YOOOOOOOOO IT'S GETTIN JUICYYYYYY. also our cat I mentioned in the an of chapter 8 has settled in well. he's so talkitive lol. I LOVE YOU GUYS I HOPE YOU'RE ENJOYING HAPPY PRIIIIIDEEEEEEE~~~~~ BEEEEE WHO YOU AARRRREEEE FOR YOUR PRIIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDEEEEEEEE

tags @yesv01@magcon7280 @hopefullhearts @thatawkwardlittlefangirl @sunshineangel-reads @dustyinkpages @inejsknifes @tulipmagnoliaisme @ev3ningrain SORRY IF I MISSED ANYONE YELL AT ME IN THE NOTES AND ILL ADD YOU LOL

You take in a big lungful of the crisp, springtime fresh Auradon air as you crawl out of your rabbit hole and back into Overland. Roots and twigs and grass stick to your skirts, but you don’t mind much. You check your pocket watch in a panic, and scurry to the tourney match. You’re merely a pebble’s throw away, so you reach the bleachers quite quickly. Late, granted, but not too late. Not horribly, irreversibly, all-endingly late. You climb up to your usual spot in the bleachers, only a few seats away from the isle kids. Well, Mal and Evie, really, since Jay and Carlos are out on the field. You try to wave at the girls, but they seem much too preoccupied with the game to notice. You understand their fascination, tourney matches are simply addictive. 

You yourself hadn’t been one for sports - aside from the occasional caucus race - that is, until Ben joined the tourney team last year. He must have spent every spare moment leading up to his first match trying to explain the rules to you with no luck, but the moment the referee blew her whistle, you were enamored watching him play. And it’s simply been that way ever since. No matter what it is, you know it will be a fantastical time if Ben’s the one playing. This seems especially true today. 

Ben tears up the field like an absolute animal - no pun intended - and within minutes has scored yet another goal for Auradon. The Fighting Knights are pulling out all the stops, and through even your unwavering faith in Ben’s athleticism, it’s starting to look like a close call. You pull out a teacup from your bag, the china cool under your fingertips. It’s adorned with a white catchfly and chestnut print, but you don’t pay much attention to it. 

Your eyes are locked on Ben as he races down the field, and you pour the spout of your tea pot shaped bag into the cup. Warm, perfectly brewed rooibos and nettle tea trickles from its spout. You shake it absentmindedly a few times, and some lemon slices and lavender sprigs fall in, floating atop the beverage. You take a sip of the warm, perfectly seasoned herbal tea, nearly choking on it as Jay drags Carlos across the field. You watch with bated breath as they move strategically, setting up Ben to score the perfect winning goal. The ball flies straight into the net, and you jump up, cheering and applauding, not even noticing the rooibos and nettle tea stain on your skirt. The crowd roars right along with you, applauding and cheering deafeningly while the announcer congratulates Auradon Prep on their win. Before he can even finish speaking, Ben grabs the mic from him.

You stop dead in your tracks, brow furrowed.

That’s not like him. 

Not at all. 

“Excuse me, excuse me!” Ben pants, still out of breath as he tries to get the crowd’s focus. “Can I have your attention please?��

The stands quiet as he speaks. 

“There’s- uh, there’s something I’d like to say!”

What in the Knave’s good name is he doing? Your mind races, trying to remember if he’d said anything about something like this. Were there any speeches, any announcements, anything like that he was going to make after the game? You can’t remember him mentioning anything like that. Besides, he always runs his speeches by you first to make sure it comes across the way he intends it too. Even something as small as an opening statement or homework presentation, he always gets your feedback first. You watch the way his eyes dart around, the way he hesitates as he tries to figure out what he’s saying. Your stomach drops. He’s improvising this. This whole situation feels surreal. Most peculiar, and most definitely unlike him. 

After another moment of floundering, he finally addresses the crowd. 

“Give me an M!” 

The crowd complies, shouting out the letter and mirroring the shape he’s making with his arms. 

“Give me an A!” 

“A!” 

While the crowd complies yet again, throwing their arms over their heads in an A shape, your eyes fly over to Audrey. You’re afraid you know where this is going, even though it makes positively less sense than the most twisting turning riddles you’ve ever encountered in Wonderland. Your horrified, bewildered expression is the opposite of her hopeful one, and you realize you’re thinking the same thing. Your stomach sinks in a sick, twisting feeling. Your mind races in a dreamlike panic. 

He can’t seriously be asking Audrey to marry him, could he? 

There’s no way. There’s simply no chance that the Ben you’ve known for longer than you’ve been brewing tea would do something so… impulsive. Everything about Ben is calculated. Well thought through. Ben agonizes over each and every decision, he lies awake at night paralyzed by the potential consequences of each action, each choice not being thought all the way through and analyzed from every possible angle. If proposing to Audrey was even a thought in his mind, he would have told you about it. 

There’s simply no other way. There’s no possibility this was even an option in his mind. Just last week when you had quietly implied that maybe he should consider ending their relationship, his silence spoke louder than any words could have. You had seen that. You saw it in his eyes. There’s no way he could be changing his mind that quickly, and not consulting you - or someone about it? You know you would have gotten wind if he even implied he was toying with the notion. Ben does not flip-flop. So what is… this?

“Give me an L!”

Audrey’s face drops. Yours floods with relief. 

He’s not proposing. 

“C’mon, I can’t hear you!” Ben calls out into the mic, hyping up the crowd. They yell Mal’s name again at Ben’s encouragement. You think you see where he’s going with this. It makes sense - Jay and Carlos each got a big starring moment during the tourney game. Now, Ben is giving a shout out to Mal and Evie so they can share in the glory, and won’t feel left out. It’s a brilliant idea, you realize, but you still can’t figure out why he didn’t plan something like this ahead. Did he realize last minute that Mal and Evie might feel excluded? It’s possible. And right now, it’s the most rational explanation you have for this unusual behavior. Before you can feel too relieved, he leans into the mic. You wait for him to instruct the crowd to give him an E, beginning to spell Evie’s name, and-

“I love you, Mal!”

Your stomach drops. You freeze again, brow furrowed more than before. The world around you spins as you stand in the crowd, disoriented. He says it like a deathbed confession, the words tearing from his throat. Through your confused stupor, you can hear the sincerity, the yearning in his voice. 

What?

You don’t even think to look over at Audrey, but you’re sure as anything her expression is exactly the same as yours - completely and totally shell shocked. Probably moreso, you think, she is his girlfriend after all. But is she? Anymore, that is. You can’t imagine she would want to be after a display like that, after Ben publicly- 

Ben…

Ben. 

His gaze flicks over to you for a split second, not even long enough for you to silently ask him what the hell is going on. But it’s just long enough for you to see a flash of something. A look in his eye. Fear. Confusion. Everything you’re feeling for him right now. His attention is ripped forcefully back to Mal. Whatever was there, you can’t see it now. 

“Give me a beat!” Ben demands overzealously to the band. They start playing something for him, something loud and fast. Ben begins singing Mal’s praises. Literally. You’re still frozen, sick with a cold, confused feeling that makes the world around you feel like a strange dream. Unreal. You begin to question if you are dreaming. Through your dazed state - which you only later realize has begun to be accompanied by hot tears blurring your vision - you could swear you saw Mal and Evie share some sort of look, whisper knowingly. They giggle. Mal pulls a zip top bag of cookies out of her jacket pocket and they both start giggling. Laughing. 

A noise catches your scattered attention and you notice Ben has launched himself into the stands, crowd surfing to get all the way over to Mal. He climbs down, grabbing her waist and pulling her close. It’s so intense, so passionate, so unlike him to do something like that in public. You start to gasp, but you can’t. The stands are so loud, each noise feels like a gunshot deafening you. Your lungs feel like they’re being squeezed from the bottom up like paint tubes, gripped by an artist desperate for the last drops of cadmium yellow deep. 

His hand rests firmly on the small of her back.

Just like it does on yours.

Something sickening twists through you, contaminating your heart and sapping away at your strength. Audrey’s voice cuts through, piercing and shrill as she announces to Ben that Chad is her boyfriend now. You see them kiss in your peripheral vision, eyes still locked on the way Ben’s hand sits on Mal’s back. He doesn’t seem to notice Audrey either, or at the very least, he doesn’t acknowledge her. Normally you’d giggle privately at how much that would irritate her, but nothing so frivolous crosses your mind just then.

“I love you, Mal!” Ben exclaims into the microphone. “Did I mention that?”

He leans closer, aching for her, needing her. But she puts her hands on his chest, trying to keep more distance between them. 

“Mal,” he begs, panting as his breath fans across her face, his cheeks flushed. He grips her tighter, leaning closer until he’s practically dipping her. The crowd watches, shocked at the sight of Prince Ben - who is known for his diplomatic reserve and continuous composure - acting so bold in public. “Will you go to coronation with me?”

“Yes!” Mal’s response comes a little too easily. 

You stare off into space in his general direction, choked with disbelief. You feel so frightened and confused and unwelcome. It’s a cold, isolated feeling of strangeness you’ve been running from since you could walk. You knew what people said about Wonderlandians, what they whispered behind your back when they thought you couldn’t hear. It was always Ben who made that feeling go away. He had seen the change in you, too. The more time you spent together since you were littles, the more he included you and sent disapproving princely looks to anyone who dared to tease you or make you feel like you’re not a part of Auradon, the more it started to work. He saw you relax, saw you believe him when he said he was happy to see you. He saw the shame and paranoia from accepting the fact that everyone around you was teasing you behind your back, spreading lies and rumors fade away. 

Ben watched you grow into yourself the moment he showed you that you were safe to do so. Now, after ten years, that horrible feeling is back and Ben is gone. You turn, rushing out of the bleachers, hopping down to solid ground and turning underneath the stands. You’ve barely stopped before the world caves in around you, and the familiar scent of earth and night and the good kind of confusion envelop your senses, like a hug from your mother. 

You fall down the rabbit hole, and you weep. Shamelessly, loudly, uncontrolled. Your tears fly off into the air above you as you fall, no longer afraid of prying eyes. You cry and cry, losing your sense of time and space as you fall deeper and deeper away from the world that never seems to lose amusement in stinging you when you least expect it. You take in a breath, but before you can let it out as another aching sob, you’re plunged underwater. 

Your eyes flare open in the deep waves around you, the black void of a sky above. You kick yourself up to the surface, gasping as you tread the current carrying you downstream. The water splashes around you, getting into your mouth, and it’s salty. A stork sails by on a little wooden raft, adjusting her captain’s hat. “Well, that would do it!” She exclaims in a thick, Wonderlandian accent. “I was wondering what caused these high tides.” 

She maneuvers her raft towards you and hauls you onto it, her gangly legs wobbling awkwardly as she keeps her balance. She pulls a handkerchief out of her pocket and hands it to you, her long feathers tickling your fingertips. 

“Dry your eyes there, dearie, or else we’ll be having to build a new dam!” 

You sputter an apology, which she dismisses goodnaturedly, and begins singing a confusing sea shanty as she navigates the waves, coming and going as you try to calm yourself. After a few minutes, a particularly large wave pushes you two over the river’s edge and sends you spinning into the forest. 

“Well, there you have it.” She says, taking off her cap and dumping out water, sand, a few shells, and a very irritable codfish. She unties the strings of her raft, gathering up the large sticks used to make it into a bundle, and tucking them under her arm.

“Quite useful, you know,” She says softly, before handing you a piece of nicely shaped paper. It reads The Two Blwo’s Shipping Survise. “And if you ever need something lickety split, I do hope you’ll give me a call.”

She tilts her hat and lopes off through the woods into darkness. 

You plop yourself down on the nearest thing - a large, bioluminescent blue mushroom with little purple spots that makes a sound like a big deep drum when you sit down on it. Several smaller mushrooms varying in size scatter near the base of the one you’re seated on. As you pull your foot up to get comfortable, you graze a few of the litter ones, and let out different tones and types of drums too. Normally this would fascinate you. Normally you would be taking pictures, writing about them in your journal, and trying to learn how to play a song on them - if they’re in the right sort of temperament, of course. But today you don’t even notice.

Your mind is still spiraling, sucked down into a whirlpool of the day’s events. You go over and over what happened, hoping to make sense of it, but unable to really process anything. That was so strange, Ben is acting so strange. Why is he acting like that, you wonder. Did he hit his head? Has he somehow been possessed by a very extroverted poltergeist? Why would he do that? It doesn’t make sense. It doesn’t even make nonsense. Even in Wonderland, there are still patterns, there are still rules and motivations for doing things. Even if those rules and patterns don’t make sense to anyone else, they’re still real. Wonderland is illogical and absurd, but it’s not purely random. 

You rock yourself comfortingly on the bouncy mushroom, the soft noise providing an ambiance that helps you start to think again. There’s no feasible pattern or non-pattern or non-pattern pattern to Ben’s behavior. If there were one, you would be able to find it, especially if you know him as well as you do. And you do. You glance down and see some beetles marching in a line, carrying leaf umbrellas to avoid any more falling tears. You wipe them from your cheeks quickly. 

“My apologies.” You say, your voice polite and fragile. The head beetle chirps, clicking his wings and tipping his hat. He ushers the others past your mushroom quickly, putting their leaf umbrellas onto an umbrella leaf bush nearby. 

A few bread-and-butterflies flitter over, carrying a tray of tea and cakes. They place it before you gently, brewing you a cup of blackberry earl grey with extra honey. You thank them, and they nod, flittering off and leaving a trail of buttery breadcrumbs as their wings flap. They land nearby, listening to you mutter to yourself as the line up to form a loaf. The tea and cakes are delicious, full of jam and honey, and they steady your nerves. You take in another breath, less shaky this time, and begin to think. Not panic, really think. 

“There has to be a reason,” you mumble out loud, “There simply has to be. Ben doesn’t just lose his composure like this. He’s not devoid of sensibilities and decision making. He’s worked so hard to hone his reputation as someone trustworthy, someone full of common sense and compassion, and that… being that person for Auradon is everything to him.”

You place down your tea cup firmly, brow furrowing as your confusion melts away to determination. 

“Everything! He would never do something so… impulsive, and foolhardy, and- and… not like him!” 

You stand up quickly, landing on your feet. 

“I must get to the bottom of this.” You pause. “Or top. Either way.”

You gather your things, fix your hair, and wring out the water from your dress. Even if Ben doesn’t care about his reputation anymore, about his future, the very future of Auradon and all who reside within it, you do. Your loyalty to Ben simply cannot be broken by a day like today.  You won’t let him throw away everything he’s worked towards for no reason. For any reason! If he’s just gone mad, that’s one thing to be dealt with. But there’s a good chance he’ll come back to his senses sooner or later, and you refuse to let everything to hell in a handbasket until he does. 

You are going to figure this out. You’re going to do as much damage control as needed until Ben is back to you and Back to himself. And he is going to come back to himself. You’re sure of it.

Filled with tea cakes and determination, you summon a rabbit hole back to Auradon, and jump through. You flip and twist through the darkness, falling past a bookshelf that floats along with you for a moment, offering a few titles that might prove useful. 

When light breaks the surface and you hear the cracking of polished stone floors, you climb through and emerge into the library. You dust the dirt off yourself and off your hands, setting down your books on a table. You begin to look around, rushing through the library and moving with purpose. You pull book after book off the shelves until you can hardly carry them to the checkout desk. Many of them will be fruitless, you’re sure, but anything is better than nothing in times like these.

“Doing some light reading, Ms. Liddell?” The librarian asks, chuckling at the imposing stack of books you’ve placed before her as she scans through them. 

“There’s nothing light about it, I’m afraid.”She looks up, surprised by the unusual heaviness to your voice, the sharp, focused determination. “Thank you, madam.” You say, grabbing all your books and marching off to your dorm. You have a lot of reading to get through.

[noneorother]

The puns are never ending : Aziraphale's miraculous "visable" bullet.

Aside from this closeup diagram of how to perform the bullet catch being objectively hilarious, it's also got a pretty fascinating *spelling mistake*.

If you look closely at the part of the pamphlet in red, you'll see that the bullet should be hidden in the mouth where it won't be visable. Not "not visible". Not visable. Seems innocuous enough right? But of course, the layers are never ending.

"Visable" is actually a Middle English word, *not* a modern English one. The last time it was used was before the printing press was invented, so pretty old. Here's a little background :

What's really fascinating though, is that just like the expression "dark horse", the word has two meanings : one is "Capable of good judgement, prudent" the other is "Tractable and docile".

There are also only two examples of the word in context that I can find, and they really should be sending you into orbit :

The first one is actually from Henry Lovelich's translation of the French epic poem "The Romance of Merlin" also known as the first English treatment of the Arthurian legends. It's modernized as "He was a worthy knight, valiant and visable in every fight." Which uses the "good judgment" meaning and sounds... a lot like Aziraphale in his role of guardian and protector.

Why do we care? They are standing literally in front of Excalibur, Arthur's sword.

The other one is from "Ipomadon", another middle English epic poem about a hidden identity romance between a beautiful but proud heiress, and her dark knight in disguise. "She was... visable and virtuous, meak and mild, and marvellous." Which clearly uses the "tractable and docile" meaning, but also... kinda sounds like Aziraphale in his damsel in his distress mode, which:

Ahahahah fuck off. But wait, there's more!

I originally twigged to this error because if you, like me, also happen to speak the language of la plume de ma tante, you know there's a reason why the uses happen in epic poems that originated in France: it's a loan word from old French, and still exists today in modern French, but it doesn't mean tractable and docile...

For the non-french speaking among you, it's a derivation of the verb "viser" :

Verb 1 To aim 1.To aim, to carefully direct one's gaze or a weapon towards a goal to throw something at it.

And so, if you happen to be, oh I don't know, a demon and have been alive for thousands of years and can definitely speak all the languages on earth and happen to have participated in the Arthurian age in England, when you read that pamphlet really carefully because someone is making you do a crazy stunt and there's a miracle blocker on, you could *conceivably* have read the instructions as:

"IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT YOU LOVE, DO NOT SHOOT AZIRAPHALE IN THE FACE." ________________________________________________________ Thanks to @thebluestgreen and @embracing-the-ineffable as always.

[mibkid]

Can i just say as both an artist and cosplayer i am so greatful and amazed over Jojo's amazing linked universe comic and just how much time and effort she puts into it.

i mean i am floored over 10 pages a month fully colored with detailed backgrounds and good story, believe me it's crazy amount of work. ...and speech bubbles. eurgh typography...(u can guess which part of comic making i enjoy the least)

Not only that but i am eternally greatfull for just how many angles we get to see the characters in the comic, the varied poses and expressions are not only amazing to look at and great way to show personalities, but also just such great reference points when either drawing the characters or trying to figure out how the hell a costume is built up.

AND jojo has drawn them in various stages of their clothes on during the comic, so you KNOW HOW THE LAYERING WORKS.

How is Time's armor built up? Boom right there in multiple angles and sometimes off.

Ah how does Hyrule's layering work? BOOM right there with an interesting maybe leather based under-armor??

How large is Twilight's chainmail and how is it built up? BAM right there.

Jojo literally drew a whole page of how Sky's clothes are built up, layer by layer.

It's truly a blessing!

AND IT IS CRAZY that jojo added so much beautiful embroidery to the characters' clothes.

(my brain is like "oh but me like to know every detail of the embroidery of every character", and i end up looking at the pictures and say "sush brain don't be a spoilsport they're already detailed just use your imagination of what jojo has drawn and what could fit the specifics", because that is fun too! like Sky's embroidery on his over-undershirt could very much be berries of some sort on twig together with some sort of classic skyloftian forms, like lingon berries though it isn't,( i know that lingon berries don't exist in hyrule...) but it would be a fun idea!)

As you can see by my... detailed oriented nature i am very interested in their designs. But again the whole comic is a true wonder, i mean, so many angles not just the characters but the surroundings. So many different zoom-outs and zoom-ins utilized, the comic knows when to change from one character to another to more than one. So it's great on a technical standpoint too. And it's SO cool to see how Jojo's art has changed through time. (that is not a pun)

Anyway, i felt like i had a lot to say, and this was me saying it. I guess it's a Appreciation post for jojo, for showing other artists and creatives so much different and amazing artwork. (and giving us amazing references)

But also it's that i want other people to see(though i think they do already) how much time and effort and love has been put into it, not that it matters much coming from me as a random person who happens to enjoy her work.

But i think it's fun to show appreciation for artists and writers anyway.

[bokunoheros]

ཐིཋྀ KINKTOBER - day 12 squirting : shouta aizawa/eraserhead

warnings : afab reader, reader and aizawa are married, y’all have a cat, pussy slapping (pun probably intended), this is doo-doo dog shit, like this actually sucks, doo doo fart ass, dookie, poo poo fart, smegma, this fic reads like what sharting yourself feels like, this fic smells like the family bathroom at walmart, we’re fucking twelve (not literally), don’t expect anything else genuinely, butt, pretend this was never posted, PLEASE, day 12 is NOT REAL, THEY HIT THE PENTAGON— MR PRESIDENT GET DOW— bill gates did it, bill cypher is canon, squirting, fingering idk, eating ass, butthole rimming, 2024 election, ellen digestive did 9/11, Trump x Biden, 9/11, hilary emails included, proof of aliens existence, video footage of the area 51 raid, UFOs, alien butt sex, wrong usage of condoms, anal probing, biological dna harboring, sickle cell anemia, KLANCE is canon, Steven universe, major character death, gem fusions, love children, feel like cinderella naega byeonhae, NETFLIX ORIGIONAL, only on Hulu, Elsa x Jackfrost smut, playdough, me x YOU, tiana x nanami au, your mom x me, sarcamouche x kazuha, xiao x venti, improper use of crack cocaine, making herion, mentions of drug mules, dead dove: do eat, improper use of magic, meth making, cocaine balloons bursting, Harry Potter x Snape, hermoine x the whomping willow, herobrine x steve, unfortunate uses of pixels, bakudeku slime, hnnng harder daddy, mmhppgh— yeah yeah right there, cum consumption, cumflation, feeder fetish, oh yeah, koolaid man x me, very improper use of koolaid packets, nickacaco avocado weight loss journey, apology videos (tears included), , banjos, jake paul dcead body in forest footage (NOT CLICKBAIT), live leak posts, webtoon origional, anal stretching, did you know the human anus can stretch to the size of a raccoon?, now you know that, and also, the sun will explode June 17th, 3028, character flaws, bodily anatomy, your balls will explode on october 21st at 7:99am, my gleeby deeby ass, futurama, Micheal Angelo, improper use of abortions, medical surgery on a grape, plastic surgery, baby killing, tampon usage, description of endangered animal poaching, Mario Kart, tuberculosis, ima get it donnnne oh aye oh aye oh, butt stuff, dazai x chuuya, atsushi x akutagawa, mpreg, mad cow disease, omegaverse, ranpo x me, Dream SMP, matpat x scott cowthan, michael afton x freddy fazbear, aggressive typing, bath salts, bath salt inhalation, whippets, galaxy gas, all might is a bottom, skinny men, carrington x shigaraki, anorexia anorexia anorexia, afo x nana shimura, BLOODY MARY, BLOODY MARY, BLOODY MARY, TW gun law debates, tenko x mon, Amazon delivery, school shootings, talk of gun laws, bad dragon toys, silicon, aoyama belly button leaking, lego ninjago r34, ninja turtles r34, bloody mary r34, kamala harris r34, tenya iida x tensei iida, jesus x judas, luigi x bowser, sonic and shadow makeout sesh, i fuck your dad, suck his dick reallll nice, penis sounding with dirty twig, orgasm denial, overstimulation, xenotransplants, oviposition, diaper Taco Bell, people die, revival, dark magic, ecoterrorism, global warming, chemical warfare, wanda x the winter soldier, haruhi x tamaki suoh, cosmo x wanda, comicon, bronies, pegasisters, mentions of twilight sparkle dying, twiilight sparkle x mordecai, air planes, shootings stars, night skies, NLE Choppa, we could really use a wish bro, TuPac is back, floppa carts: plompy haze, death of a platform known as tumblr, twitter referred to as X, elon musk creates sex robot that specializes in butthole sex, Tesla sex robot, androids that FUCK, necrophilia, android phone usage, pheromones, premonitions and words of Jesus, divine intution, potion making, heavenly visions, satan, satanic visions, the heavenly principles, celestia is above mondstadt, spiritual healing, veganism, white washing, canon hispanic hanta sero, futanari, blasian mina ashido, bovine spongiforms, Tenya Iida virginity loss, bakugo is a fucking faggot, handjobs, footjobs, peaceful protests, the government is controlling you through vaccines, asian fishing,

vaccines might cause autism, freshwater fishing, they will, xenophobia, hentai hucows, incest, usage of slurs, starbucks coffee, lizards run the world, obama might be a lizard, inappropriate use of baby oil, gojo x getou, day twelve never existed and it was all a lie.

word count : 420k words and 69 pages

🐙 note : we are not locked in we are as loose as a ran through sorority president

🦊 note : i am. i have no words. idek what happened. we ran out of time so we went with the option we thought might make people giggle (no we didnt we did this bullshit for ourselves)(your regularly scheduled content will resume tmr!)

🪲 note : i ain’t fucking sorry

you adored your husband—shouta aizawa—so much so, that you were his dedicated housewife. he made plenty of money as a pro hero and… enough… as a teacher, so that left you to take care of the house and your shared cat. though when he did come home he was way different than he was at work, usually at work he was all nonchalant and cold but at home he was sweet and caring, sometimes even a bit rough. his students would definitely describe him as laid back and uninterested, yet when you were around they were in awe of his personality shift.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

As for the "Is Skully Secretly Jacked?" debate, I would like to bring up a point made by someone in the tags of the post that started said debate:

The twins do kinda-sorta look like twigs. Granted, they aren't human, but still.

And in my opinion, Vil and Rook both look like twigs as well.

[Referencing this post and this post!]

My response includes many example images that are MASSIVE spoilers for book 7 cards (which haven’t been released in EN yet!!) so please proceed with caution.

I think a lot of the characters definitely look like twigs due to their in-game live 2D models usually not accurately depicting their actual bodies. Just as an example, here are what the twins look like in live 2D:

... And here is what the twins look like in (Mermaid Fin SSR) card artwork. You can see there is a MAJOR discrepancy.

We also see this in Floyd's Club Wear card. His arms are much more defined in the card art and are noodle thin in the live 2D model:

It's not just the twins either. Another notable nerf between the card art and the live 2D models occurs with Silver and Sebek. I mean, just LOOK at their arms in the P.E. Uniform cards... and then how sad and limp they look in the actual gameplay...

Vil and Rook are entirely different cases. Both of them are typically wearing long sleeves, which conceals their bodies and gives the illusion of lacking muscle.

It was stated in the Magical Archives that Rook is beefier than Trey (who is quite strong from playing soccer as a kid and helping out at the Clover family bakery). It also makes sense for Rook’s character as a huntsman wanting to hide his presence (thereby making it easier for him to observe his prey). Showing off how big of a threat he actually is with his physique out on display defeats the whole purpose.

Without the arms covered, we can see how truly muscular Rook is—though again, the live 2D model is greatly toned down.

Vil, meanwhile, is in a separate category. He is strong too—this much is true! However, his build ISN’T jacked up like Sebek, Silver, Rook, etc. Why? Vil states that he dutifully trains to maintain his figure as a model but is also mindful that he doesn’t get too bulky, as that wouldn’t be aesthetically desirable for his work. You can still be strong while being lithe. Think about dancers, for example.

Vil has also demonstrated in side content such as the Sunset Savanna hometown event and Beans Day that he’s able to take down opponents far larger than him using tactics besides brute force. This includes using his foe’s weight against them to toss them and acting gravely injured to make his foe cocky.

And now let’s revisit Skully! I’d say he definitely doesn’t LOOK bulky, whether in his art or in the live 2D model.

For the sake of argument, let’s say he’s hiding massive arms under his suit. But like… where exactly?

Unlike the sleeves we normally see, the Nightmare Suits are visibly stitched. They can only be so effective for holding together. Just looking at the artwork, it doesn’t look as though Skully’s arms are straining to be freed or pushing back against the seams.

Okay, so what if Skully’s instead like Vil and has a lean frame that hides a surprising amount of strength? I don’t really buy this either because no lore supports it. Vil trains extensively because his career demands it and he is a tenacious person. What reason does Skully have to keep in such shape? He isn’t really described as an athlete or dedicated to health or something along those lines. Boy just LOVES Halloween. There isn’t a clear lore reason why Skully would want to get (excuse me for the pun) jacked.

So yeah, that’s why I don’t believe Skully’s secretly physically strong. He’s literally just… lanky.

[raginglesbian2006]

I was wondering if I could request Alastor and a hunter reader and the reader hunted deer when they were alive so meeting a deer demon would be interesting! Only if you want! Congrats on your followers- Remember to drink water and eat a snack!

Can I be ✨ anon?

of course! and thank you so much for the congratulations! Please remember to take care of yourself as well!

Time for some deer puns! >:)

Oh, Deer!

A/N: look at my baby girl :)

Your first meeting with the famed radio demon had been... interesting, to say the least.

You had stumbled upon a swamp-like area while on your daily strolls through hell. Being a hunter when you were alive naturally kicked in your curiosity and you made the decision to wander through the place. Perhaps, you had hoped, you'd get some fresh kill.

As you made your way around the tall trees- their canopies hanging over your head- your ears picked up a sound.

"Radio static? Why is there a radio around here?" you wondered.

Your curiosity grew even further. You took another step.

And another.

And another-

Wait.

Your eyes widened slightly.

"Is that...a deer...demon?"

From where you stood, you could see the demon, happily munching on raw venison. He was seated quite elegantly at a lovely little table. He took small bites with the help of his fork, the static growing with each satisfying bite.

You moved back slightly, your mind telling you to walk away when suddenly, you heard a crunch.

A lone dry twig lay smashed against the sole of your shoe.

There was an eerie silence following this. You looked back at where the demon was...but you found no one, save for the lifeless deer who lay sprawled on the table, guts out for everyone to see.

Without a warning, something grabbed you by the neck and shoved you against a tree. You let out a startled scream.

Your eyes found the demon-his form looking so much more...terrifying than what you'd seen before. His eyes were wide and his pupils resembled that of radio dials. His mouth was stretched in a frightening grin as blood poured through his sharp teeth. His antlers grew larger by the second. Tentacles arose from around him menacingly as one held you against the tree.

Sure you could die right now but all you could think of at the moment was that he looked...majestic.

"₩Ⱨ₳₮ ł₴ ₳ ₱₳₮ⱧɆ₮ł₵ ₴ł₦₦ɆⱤ Ⱡł₭Ɇ ɎØɄ ĐØł₦₲ ł₦ ₥Ɏ ₣ØⱤɆ₴₮?" His voice came out distorted. You winced as the static grew louder than ever.

"I-I s-swear, I was just passing through!" you wheezed out.

You felt the pressure around your neck increase. Tears started pooling around your eyes.

"₳₦Đ ⱧØ₩ ĐØ ł ₭₦Ø₩ ɎØɄ ₳ⱤɆ ₮Ø ฿Ɇ ₮ⱤɄ₴₮ɆĐ?"

Your free hands scrambled to reach your pocket. You pulled out your hunting license- something you had died with back when you were alive, showing it to him.

"I-I'm a hunter! I stumbled upon this f-forest and I-I wanted to s-see if I'd get some f-fresh kill!" you managed to voice out, despite your breath being restricted.

You fell to the ground suddenly, as the static around you returned to its normal range. You started breathing in short gasps, your body adjusting to the release of force from around your neck.

"Well, why did you not say so?" the demon said, jovially, "I am always delighted to meet another hunter like myself!"

You felt yourself be pulled up, your arms clutched around his claws. You managed to find your balance and stood on your shaking limbs.

The demon then grabbed your hand and shook it, fervently, "My name is Alastor. It's a pleasure meeting you,dear! Quite the pleasure!"

His eyes caught onto the reprehensive look on your face as he continued, "I do apologize for my behavior. It's just that when you're a powerful overlord like myself," he gloated, "It becomes hard differentiating friend from foe. One can never be too careful!"

You nodded hesitantly, "I do not mean to pose any harm to you, Alastor. As I said, I truly did not know this," you gestured to your surroundings, "belonged to you."

Alastor hummed in reply and then patted the top of your head, "Do not worry, my dear. We are in hell after all. Errors are a common thing."

He then looked at you with a curious eye, "You said you were a hunter. Oh, do tell me more."

⋘ ──── ∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗ ──── ⋙

And that was how you become acquainted with the radio demon himself. As mentioned previously, you were a hunter back when you were alive but what you loved hunting the most, was deer. In fact, it was the deer-hunting shenanigans that led to you dying in the first place.

Alastor and you bonded over your shared love for venison, albeit you liked it a bit more...cooked. On one of his many meetings with you, he showcased his wide array of guns, perfectly polished and ready to be used. Safe to say, you were starstruck.

You never questioned his deer-like features. You assumed it had something to do with his death so you never pestered him about it. You valued your afterlife a whole lot more.

(Although you did want to touch his ears so badly. They looked so incredibly fluffy.)

You remember you managed to take a glimpse of his little tail when he took off his overcoat. He found you ogling at his rear which prompted him to threaten you to keep your lips sealed. You did, of course.

And my god, did the two of you love deer puns... (Brace yourselves, folks)

"What did the deer say after he finished eating?"

You looked at Alastor, eyeing him from above your cup of coffee, "What?"

"That was deer-licious!"

You choked on your drink, as you laughed.

⋘ ──── ∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗ ──── ⋙

"Hey Al!" you called out to him.

Alastor turned to you, his head turning 360 without his body turning the same way, "Yes, dear?"

"What’s a buck’s least favorite sandwich bread?"

Alastor hummed, "No-eye-deer!"

You burst out laughing, "No! Let me finish my pun!" You took a deep breath to sound out your answer.

"Sour doe!"

A boisterous laugh from the radio demon ensued.

⋘ ──── ∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗ ──── ⋙

If you were told years ago that you would befriend a fearsome cannibalistic overlord, you would have laughed at their face.

Welp, how the turn tables.

A/N: Well this turned out a bit different from what I'd planned but I do hope you enjoy it! Also, I do apologize for not answering this request for so long T-T. I procrastinate a lot.

Also, I must say I truly resisted getting Alastor to say, "Get out of mah swamp!" XD

[twig-tea]

Twig's GL Recs for March-July 2024

[Here’s my rec list for GLs through to Feb 2024 ]

Fake Buddies Korean, YouTube, 7 episodes (one ep BL, one ep GL, one ep crossover, and then 2 more BL prequel eps and two more GL prequel episodes), approx 45 minutes when compiled, Apr 27-Jun 28 2024

At first this was a little three-part series in which it turns out both members of the couple are secretly in a homosexual relationship with their best friends and using the other as a beard. Lots of comedy of errors and puns (“I like lilies better than roses”) as the characters try to make each other understand the situation they’re in. The backstory prequels were really cute friends to lovers, and it was really nice to see these couples land in solidarity! This series is short and cute and pure fluff.  

To the X Who Hated Me: YunO x Jane Korean, YouTube, 3 episodes ~6 mins each, aired May 22-29 [microseries complete, X who hated me series may be ongoing]

When the previous 2-ep miniseries under this umbrella landed (which I wrote about here: ), I had no idea it was going to be a series of microseries! These are all short but good second chance romances. This one has a ���reality”-show-within-a-show format, with a frustrating misunderstanding, and a good kiss. Be sure to always watch past the credits for this series! 

You Are My Star, Thai, YouTube, 1ep 37 mins (aired as 3 12-min eps and then they compiled into this one short film), May 18 [complete]

This was a cute Thai GL that I enjoyed mostly because of the very clear cribbing of specific scenes from recent BLs. It was mostly trope-y (both cuteness and drama), with good kissing. See if you can spot the BL references.

Xiao Xiang Yi Jiu, Chinese, YouTube, 7 episodes 2 mins each, May 20-June 3 [complete]

This little microseries is about a girl becoming an intern for her crush/idol. Happy ending, and they do become explicitly girlfriends! No kiss because censorship.

Lonely Girls Korean, YouTube, 4 episodes 8 minutes each (32 mins compiled) May 14 [complete]

This is about a couple that struggles with the closet, lack of communication, and how to make their relationship last in the face of uncertainty. Also there’s good kisses. SukFilm have done other series before and since, but this is my fave GL of theirs so far. 

The Two of Us Deep Night spinoff, Thai, YouTube, 6 episodes, 15 mins each, airing May 30-July 4 [complete]

I was so confused at first, because I didn’t realize this was supposed to be their story during the events of Deep Night that we didn’t get to see. I was excited about this one but bummed that we started the miniseries with a health scare and then a threat by Meiji to marry some guy just to make Freya jealous? I found it a little frustrating that two women in their 40s could not be honest with each other. The couple is so cute, but the storytelling is not, so take this rec with a grain of salt. Still, it’s so nice to see women in their 40s being super cute and in love in between the drama so I’m keeping it on this list! I am very glad to have gotten the dance sequence and the bath sequence. 

******

And of course currently airing right now so take with a grain of salt because i don’t yet know how they end, but 

Ayaka is in Love with Hiroko Japanese, 8 episodes, 25 mins, airing July 4- August 22 [ongoing]

This is a laugh-out-loud funny office comedy in which Akaya flirts desperately with her senior colleague at work, Hiorko, who then spends her evenings complaining to her friends at the lesbian bar about oblivious straights who don’t understand the meaning of what they say. I've written a little more about this show here. It is my favourite GL of the year so far and if it stays this good is on its way to being one of my favourites of all time!

The Secret of Us Thai, 8 episodes, 50 mins each, airing June 24-August 15 [ongoing]

This series starts with the cutest episode of all time and then devolves quickly into serious drama lol but it did a good job avoiding pure “noble idiocy” so I’m hopeful it will continue to hold up. As of ep3 things are happening that I did not expect, so I’m really curious how this one will go. In the meantime, it is also worth noting that these actresses are excellent kissers.

[UPDATE: Of these two that were airing, I ended up thinking I was going to have to retract for The Secret of Us but instead retracted for Ayaka Is In Love With Hiroko. I had way more fun with Ayaka week to week but the ending was really disappointing; The Secret of Us in contrast nailed the ending. I wrote about it a bit here. ]

[galebrainrot2024]

GalexYou!Gender Neutral NSFW18+

NSFW19+ MINORS DNI Read on Ao3 Alternate universe ahem where you, the reader, (gender neutral) are feeling sexually frustrated by our favorite rizzard. Happy Valentine’s Day, Galmancers - a second, fluffier V-Day piece with smut will be coming (pun intended) later today. Content: Oral Sex, Mutual Pining

You couldn’t take it anymore. Gale had stopped you right after the heat of battle to comment on how badly he wanted you and not a word since. Not so much as a wanton glance, an unholy touch, a salacious joke. 

Gale left you to wonder, left your insides to turn in on themselves to cannibalize you. You were nearly to Moonrise and even Astarion had professed his love to you - though, you extended the branch in friendship which he seemed relieved to take instead. 

Wyll even had taken your hand in a dance and you indulged him, hoping to get a rise out of Gale. A response. Anything. Yet, he continued on as if he hadn’t confessed his wicked needs to you. As if he didn’t express his desires. What drives a person to say such a thing and wait so long? 

You now decide to take matters into your own hands. After dinner and the rest of your companions retire to their respective tents, you catch Gale creeping off into the tree line. Your brow furrows and you follow behind, careful not to step on an errant branch or twig that would reveal you. 

As you follow him deeper into the woods, you come across a thicket, a rolling field shrouded by shadow where Gale stops. You cock your head, confused, yet watching silently from afar. You see him roll up his sleeves and lick your lips seeing his lithe arms and fingers deftly stroke through the air. 

You look above and see a faint illusion of… the stars. Your breath catches and you murmur to yourself, apparently loud enough that Gale’s eyes snap to you and lock on your face. 

You both stay frozen in the moment for a spell, transfixed on one another. You raise your hand to wave, albeit awkwardly. It earns you a crooked grin that makes your heart sing. 

You gesture as if to ask if you can approach and he nods, his eyes transfixed on you. As you brush through the tall grass and sit beside him, he gives you a devilish grin. “Come here to spy on me, have you? I must admit, I’m flattered and I applaud your taste.” 

You feel the blush inch across your face and you gaze up at the sky. You look at Gale and see that he’s studying you in a way that makes your core writhe with desire. “What are you doing out here?” 

“Well…” Gale smiles sheepishly, gesturing to the stars. “Practicing.” His lips still twitch with a playful smirk and his eyes glint with mischief. Tilting your head to the side, you raise an eyebrow as if waiting for him to continue. He doesn’t. 

“Practicing for what, exactly?” You say, though your voice is hardly audible. The sounds of the Shadowlands almost drown out your words.  

Gale leans closer to you to brush a piece of hair from your face and tucks it behind your ear. His fingers linger on your skin and you tremble. You lick your lips and feel your mouth dry. “For you.” He says, his fingers brushing against the hollow of your neck before he clears his throat and pulls away, gesturing towards the stars. “I had been hoping not to make an ass of myself, yet, here we are - caught red handed. I’d been hoping to do things differently, properly for you…” 

While you usually find Gale’s verbosity charming, now you find yourself impatient for him to get out with it. “What are you saying, exactly?” You hope to sound confident, but the tremor in your voice exposes your trepidation and excitement. 

Gale looks down and releases a short puff of air, “You know what - that is not the easiest of questions for me to answer.” He brushes his thumb against his lower lip before turning to face you, taking your hands into his. Your breathing becomes shallow as you feel the electric current where your skin touches. “Surely you must know… you are the brightest spot on this otherwise bleak endeavor. I used to believe one heartbreak was enough for me… I would let you break my heart a thousand times over if it meant I had the opportunity to be with you, even for a little while.” 

Your heart is ready to leap out of your throat and without so much as a second thought, you say: “I would happily do the same.” 

Gale’s face beams, illuminated with surprise and eagerness. With one hand, he traces up your arm and shoulder, earning him a trail of goosebumps. You watch as his lips part and he moistens them, your eyes locked on one another. When you feel his thumb graze your bottom lip you feel your core pool with lust and let out a breathy sigh. He shudders and cups the back of your head to pull you towards him. 

You swallow hard, expecting your lips to crash into his but Gale pauses for a moment, allowing his lips to just linger above your own. You groan involuntarily and Gale chuckles, “I just want to savor you for a moment…” and he seems to drink in your features, inhale you, intoxicate himself with you. 

Your body is wild and alive, every cell screaming for his skin to be on yours, to taste him. You feel the arousal in your groin stir violently to life and as you gaze into Gale’s eyes, you see his brown iris’s drowned by wide, black pupils. 

Finally, his lips press to yours - the contact is firm, tender, and you feel the electricity on your lips and become unhinged. You scoot forward, wrapping your fingers into his hair to pull his face closer to yours and you feel him groan against your lips. You squirm, the arousal in you ever stronger, begging to be touched by him. He shyly parts your lips with his tongue and massages yours with his, biting down on your lower lip and you moan.  

Gale’s hands begin to move against you and he pulls back a moment, cheeks flushed, “Wait…” he inhales, trying to steady his breath, “I want to bond with you in the way Gods do… entwined in visions of the Weave… why confine ourselves to the pleasures of the mortal flesh…” His voice is thick with arousal and you chew on your bottom lip. 

“I want you,” You whisper, inching forward until you are sat on his lap, your hands resting on Gale’s shoulders and you gently push him back onto the grass. “Like this.” 

Gale’s lips part and his eyes widen, “Are you sure? You’d really prefer me as I am?” 

“Yes.” You say, matter of factly and hover over him, his hair splayed out on the ground and you feel his erection press between your thighs. It makes you rock subconsciously and Gale’s hands find your hips, gripping them tightly before his fingers begin to unravel the strings tying your trousers together. 

He works slowly, methodically and allows his fingers to brush against your lower torso. His touch is sensual and magnificent and your eyes roll back momentarily, the heat between your thighs almost too much, the feeling of his throbbing erection trapped within his briefs too much. You succumb to the pleasure and electricity of Gale's touch. A soft whimper falls from her lips, and your body arches against Gale’s, your hands moving to the bottom of his shirt, pulling it over head. 

You feel him breathe out jaggedly, the warmth tickling your skin and you lean down to early kiss his neck, flicking your tongue against his salty skin and he pushes your pants off your body. You feel your arousal press against him and you wiper. Your heart beats wildly and you feel Gale’s against your lips as you brush them against where the orb lies on his chest. He entwines his fingers in your hair for a moment, his breathing labored. “Teasing me, are you?” Gale said in a husky voice. 

“I wouldn't dare dream of doing such a thing..." Your voice is thick with desire, playful and your trail of kisses moves lower. You hear his breath hitch and it makes your arousal intensify, your fingers hooking into his trousers and tracing along the apex of his hip bone. 

“Please…” you hear him shudder out the word like a plea, your name falling from his lips like a prayer. You feel the electricity between your bodies surge and you deliberately undo and lower his pants, his firm, girthy member begging to be released from the briefs. 

You aren’t ready to give in quite yet, though. You flick your tongue along the top of Gale’s underwear and he moans, squirming. You run your hand over the center of his erection and feel how he twitches as you caress him over the cloth makes your mouth water in preparation. 

Your lips continue their teasing pattern against his lower torso and you finally release his erection and your eyes grow wide at the sight. You look up at Gale who is eyeing you hungrily, primally, yet with an overwhelming tenderness. You feel his fingers lace into your hair and his words shake, “What are you doing?” 

You give a fiendish grin and hold his gaze as your tongue licks along his inner thigh and he grips your hair tighter, earning him a moan. “I need to taste you,” You purr and you see his eyes roll back for a moment and his hips seem to rise to you, begging to be had. 

You lick your hand before you grip the base of his erection and he gasps. You laugh darkly, quietly, as if you know what is in store and lower your lips to circle the tip of his arousal. The sinful noise that escapes Gale encourages you and you sigh, rolling your tongue along his shaft as you bring him fully into your mouth. He moans louder now, fistfuls of your hair in his hands as you begin to work him. Your mouth is wet and hot and you feel his girth hit the back of your throat. You relax your throat, bringing him deeper into your mouth while your hand massages his base, the other hooked beneath his leg for purchase. You caress the curve of where his upper thigh meets his butt and he twitches.  

“I..." his words trail off, his breath a harsh whisper. “Gods above…” his hips buck up and he thrusts into your mouth, harder than you expected and it makes you feral. Your hands grip tighter, earning you a deeper thrust and you flick your tongue over his erection, over the sensitive tip and suck hard, releasing him with a pop. He moans and shudders violently, the blood pulsing through his cock arousing you more. You slow your pace and he whimpers, “Cruel…” 

This makes you smirk and stop to lick your lips, gazing up at him with siren eyes. “Am I cruel?” You say, still holding his erection and massaging slowly, your tongue running along his shaft like a sweet treat. You enjoy how Gale squirms, knowing how badly you both want this.

You can tell Gale is about to burst, his entire body slick with a sheen of sweat when you take him into your mouth again, your other hand massaging between his sensitive erection and anus. He cries out desperately and pulls your hair almost too hard. You groan, wrapping your lips around him again to take him and he cries out your name, gripping your head and begins to manipulate you, forcing himself deeper into your mouth and tears form at the corner of your eyes. Your mouth is full of him, he is salty and delicious and you work your mouth and tongue as if he is your last meal. His hips buck into you, his back arches and he tosses his head back. 

The feeling of Gale on your tongue sends shockwaves through you, the sensation being so arousing that you feel yourself creeping closer to the precipice despite having not been touched. Gale’s body trembles with excitement as your mouth works expertly, like a master chef, indulging in him and graze your teeth along his erection. 

Gale’s veins bulge from his forearms, the unholy moans and cries of your name signaling how close he is to bliss. It makes you whimper, mewl, your mouth full and dripping with his arousal. Every cell in his body was trembling for you and as you take him deeper, you feel his pleasure and feel him thrust against the back of your relaxed throat. 

The feeling of your tongue exploring him, massaging him was too much. His eyes were unhinged when he looks at you, pulling your head up for a moment. His words are thick with passion, “May I?” You pause for a moment, unsure of the question. He swallows hard, his pupils blown wide. He flushes, embarrassed. “I don’t want to assume…” 

You smirk, realizing what he’s asking. “I want to taste the fruits of my labor..” You purr, keeping your eyes on his while you bite his inner thigh. He moans and sighs, resting back again as you take him. He can no longer fight the pleasure. Gale lets his head roll back, his body moving against you forcefully, his breath heavy and erratic, “I want to hear you…” you demand, your mouth full of him and he groans, squirming as you massage his erection, flicking your tongue along his base. 

Your fingers grip deeper into Gale's hips as he pushes your head against his girth. His forceful movements make you whimper, eager to please when you hear him cry out with abandon, your name tumbling from his lips as his climax erupts in your mouth. The hot, salty fluid makes you tremble and moan delighted, sucking harder as if to taste every inch of him. 

You pull back and wipe the corners of your mouth, almost smug as you look down at Gale who is still twitching. He pulls himself up to grab you and pull you to him. He flips you onto your back and kisses you hard, moaning as he tastes himself in your mouth. “My turn.” 

[fishyfishyfishtimes]

Our non-marine heroine Karleeen McQueen

You know what, you already know lots of stuff about Ahti II, I’m now going to tell you about Karleeen the spidergirl, Ahti’s best friend and the protagonist of a story I’m writing! A quick information sheet:

(+ Art reference)

Karleeen (with three e’s)… well, who doesn’t know about Karleeen! Probably not by looks, but you could read all about her on the papers some years back. It’s been a while, you'd hardly recognise her if you saw her now! Especially among the other jolly beachgoers, joggers, shoppers and summertime tourists; Karleeen lives in Naantali after all, with her single father on the coast of southwest Finland. In the summer it's busy, in the winter it's very quiet, all year round it's a very appropriate place for Karleeen, she thinks.

Now in her mid-teens (the Sirpaverse “starting point” is 2021), Karleeen is a most open and jolly girl! She loves socialising and chats with just about anybody she has a chance to interact with for more than five minutes. She’s always planning outings and looking to spend time with her best friends, too! She enjoys being silly, making wordplay and coming up with puns with ridiculous set-ups. Karleeen is a sensitive soul, she feels all of her emotions very strongly and shows them strongly, too. She sometimes has trouble regulating her emotional reactions and has a tendency to spiral. It's very difficult for Karleeen to lie, her feelings will be very clear from her facial expressions and body language no matter how hard she may pretend to feel otherwise. Not that she'd even lie! It would make her feel too bad.

Karleeen has loved nothing more her whole life than making "thingamajigs" — you know, machines, things that move, little inventions! It's so fascinating to her, how pieces that are little more than scrap on their own weave together into intricate creations that are far more than the sum of their parts. When she was a young kid she'd make things out of twigs and rocks and rope, but in her teens she's now moved onto more sophisticated methods, legos and actual robot-building sets. She's also dipping her toes into coding, so far it seems fun and it offers an additional medium for making things (only digitally this time). Karleeen would love to study mechanical engineering when she's old enough to go to a university, but it'll be a while until then! Besides for robotics Karleeen enjoys hiking in the outdoors, climbing trees, basking, collecting fun and/or useless trinkets of various kinds and strawberry-themed items, playing platformers and action-adventure games and doodling.

Karleeen’s a smart girl, but she struggles a lot with languages. Or, well, don’t let me entirely misrepresent her: she does have the achievement of knowing some ASL signs. Still, Finnish is the only language she speaks fluently and it’s her own mother tongue! She can’t quite get anything else stuck to her brain, speaking Swedish or Surish or even simple English feels like a chore. Like stated above Karleeen’s body language is very clear, one of the more common actions Karleeen does when she’s nervous, scared or sad is holding her hands and arms close to her chest.

Karleeen's favourite genre of music is classical, but she can't listen to it casually because it makes her very emotional. She likes pop, rock and soundtracks when it comes to just playing music in the car or with friends. Her favourite animals are elephants, and her favourite fish is the electric eel. Her favourite meal is minute beef steak with seasoned butter and chanterelles, but her actual favorite singular food item in general and favourite snack is wild strawberries. Her favourite drink is tap water. Her favourite flower is fireweed.

(Nowhere else to really mention this but Karleeen is also asexual and biromantic, it took a long while for her to figure out because her relationship with having human connections is rather complicated and unusual but she’s comfortable in that identity and doesn’t really overthink it, she has a lot of love in her heart for so many things so it’s only natural she would have a lot of love for many people too, she thinks)

[lurkingshan]

Every You, Every Me

Story 4 (Part 2)

Picking up from where we left off.

Man, you should NEVER butt into a harassment situation without actually knowing what is going on. I would have left, too.

Sad, though, I was hoping for more sex and dick jokes instead of drama.

This plot has taken a weird turn. And kind of a boring one tbh. I don't really care about this Phukan drawing credit conflict. Let's get back to what we're here for, please.

Thank you, show 🙏🏻

Ope, James from the flashbacks is indeed an ex. He looked so uncomfortable at that marriage proposal? Weird vibe since it seems they didn't actually break up, but perhaps just a weak acting moment.

I love it when romance shows remind us it's fine and normal to have significant past relationships and people can love more than one person in their life and there's no need to be weird about it.

Okay that said this love confession and "I can't live without you" feels pretty fast for these two.

This shot through the shower curtain is strange, it's making Sian look like a ghost.

Hell yeah, rip the towel off! I love that we keep seeing shots of those painted blue nails.

Sian looks gorgeous in the window in that morning light.

Oh no he's singing... okay it's not nearly as bad as a lot Thai drama singing, I survived.

Cuuuuute montage during that song.

It must be said though that "you're my favorite musical note/you're my favorite work of art" are such cheesy lines.

Hahahaha little brother you really need to start knocking.

HEY THEY ARE MONTAGING ACROSS THE STORIES ALL OF A SUDDEN

OMG @twig-tea was right!!!! They are actors making a series of BLs yasssssssssssss

"You and Your Beautiful Soul" is the show they're currently making.

Is this breakup scene yet another BL, or the real guys?? OMG

New names Pun and Inn (which matches with the previous brief glimpse of BTS). I think these are the actual actors who have been playing all these other characters.

FIAT IS BACK

YEP, they showed up to set upset from their breakup.

"You're not me, you don't understand." WTF that line is the same as in the breakup we just watched.

Oh, so they breakup and make up frequently.

Who is this sassy tall man 👀

Ope, and next week we seem to be staying with this story of the actors instead of changing up again. This has been the real narrative all along, and it tracks well with the stuff I noted in my binge watch--the changing names, the performances getting better as the episodes go on, the way the physical intimacy differed so much and built to be stronger across each story. All of that makes perfect sense if they're an actor pair working together across multiple shows and getting more seasoned and comfortable as they go. Such a smart concept. I'm curious if we'll learn when they started dating and about the arc of some of those previous breakup and makeups against their BLs. I hope so!

[gotbreads]

OC x Tfp Megatron (Adult Offspring)

-Said OC: Linked Here!

ABOUT:

Sire: Mornilious the Forge

Carrier: Megatron

Zeus

Height: 38ft

About: He doesn't understand emotions, causing him to be blunt and to the point in all conversations. If he hurts someone's feelings, he doesn't register that change. He doesn't register different facial expressions either.

What he lacks in emotions he gains in battle situations, causing him to have very quick thinking and very well maintained scanners with added range. Nothing gets by him without going unnoticed, his vision and audial range is also heightened.

-Downside, he easily gets overwhelmed causing him to get angry.

---Later on, Zeus learns cybertronian sign language when he needs to cut all audio feed.

For such easily engaged anger issues, he is going to therapy to regain the abilities to recognize emotions and facial expressions. And to learn ways to help his heightened senses, and ease the anger.

-Does not give a shit unless it concerns his brother and creators.

Hades

Height: 38ft

About: He is extremely charismatic and expressive, no one will ever not be happy to see him. Hades loves to joke around, flirt, bug his brother, etc.

Bots knowing that his carrier is Megatron, they'd think he would have a scratchy voice. But it's the complete opposite, his voice is buttery smooth a little deep and gravelly. Nothing like his carrier.

For his charismatic nature, he is an expert in battle, but he's a little too much of a "Let's go, plan later." He always runs head first into a problem before analyzing it, causing him to gain new scars or reopen old ones.

He will stand up for his brother, he will beat the shit out of someone if they make fun of anyone who is close to him.

-He is a dumbass

Post war Context below cut!

Megatron stayed on Cybertron within the newly established landscape, old forests finally showing their true beauty as he hid himself. Many starships entered the atmosphere, the loud and roaring sound making him feel guilty of what he put everyone through. Until, one massive starship enters the atmosphere. At first it caught him off guard, the color scheme, the lights, it was so unfamiliar.

The ship landed not far away from the forest he hid in, it was surely massive.

Parallel to the ship, Megatron saw so many be greeted by Optimus and his team. Sparklings, veterans, carriers, sires, you name it- they were all there. But one caught his optic, the tall mech with flames coming from his helm. When it dawned on who he was looking at, said mech looked right at him. The sudden movement made his entire frame freeze in place, was he seen?

Then the mech looked away, greeting Optimus and his team.

Megatron took that as the cue to leave.

-- A few stellar cycles go by leading Megatron to question who that mech was. He never forgot a face, so why couldn't he think of where he saw this mech before?

A twig snaps behind him.

His body went into the defensive, but who he saw amazed him.

The mech with flames had his servos up at the level of his helm, showing he didn't come here to fight. Once Megatron got a better look at the mech he instantly knew who it was.

Mornilious the Forge, a Gladiator before him, known for his fire bending and his weaponry craftsmanship.

They talked, mostly due to Mornilious's own curiosity.

"What if I watched over your recovery? Making sure you get the therapy you need?"

Megatron was caught off guard by Mornilious's question, a mech known by simple myth sits beside him asking if he could help.

----- Many years later:

Megatron was set into a schedule with Mornilious, the therapy helping him stay sane, showing him how to deal with his feelings and guilt.

Noticing how much Mornilious has helped him without question, simply because he wanted too. Megatron slowly started to love the old Ex-Gladiator. Including Mornilious's horrible dad jokes and puns, him not knowing current cybertronian slang/quirks, how caring and careful he is.

Mornilious reminded him of Optimus in a way, the heroic leader of the people. But much softer than the prime, the smiles, the warm hugs, the how are you's in the early morning.

The warmth is overwhelmingly lovely.

[kenni33]

Kismet headcannons

Ages: (going from eldest to youngest)

Ablaze: 29 (bros pushing his thirty’s 😭)

Trickee: 28

Boom: 25

Branch: 24

Hype: 21

Nicknames

Ablaze:

Honeybuns(a joke nickname from hype calls ablaze,he hates it not a ship thing!!!!)

Blaze

Micky mouse

Darling (yet again a joke nickname from trickee)

David

Dadvid

Trickee

Stuart (branch just randomly called trickee this one day and it stuck no has any idea why)

Trickster

Trixx

Sugar t*ts (trickee once said smt sweet and hype started calling him this )

Tee-shirt(boom)

Branch

twig

Tree

Trunk

Roots

B

Bob

And all the tree / branch puns under the sun

Boom

Rainbow

Joe

Bread

Cavetown

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee x ♾️

Rainbow alphabet

Hype

Hyperpop

Hyper

Jim

Random head cannons

Boom wasn’t born with rainbow hair he made the grave mistake of letting his friend choose his hair colour and he just dyes it rainbow now

Ablaze was once angry at trickee so trickee got branch to hold a hose, hype to play guitar and boom to hold a hair dryer and he sung a sad song to get ablaze to forgive him, it went badly everyone got soaked , booms hair got caught in the hair dryer, the hair dryer caught fire (somehow?) but ablaze forgave him (trickee ate the last of ablaze’s cereal how dare he)

Ablaze and trickee live together . It’s mayhem .

Boom loves Alec Benjamin so does branch

Boom says he doesn’t listen to cavetown but he does

Trickee once covered branch’s bunker in every kind of

Sticker he owned (branch was not pleased)

Hype once challenge ablaze to an arm wrestle (he lose. and cried)

Trickee loves to prank everyone (mostly ablaze)

Branch, hype, ablaze and boom once’s blasted a smash up of all the songs trickee hates as payback for all his pranks

They was friends since they was kids but only started the band at the end of trolls 1 branch was called B and wore a mask

Trickee and ablaze like to joke flirt but sometimes your can’t tell if it’s a joke or if their actually flirting

After finding out about branches past ablaze unofficially adopted him

Everyone (but branch who was the voice of reason) once got really high and ate crayons they never spoke of it again (expect branch who told poppy)

Sexuality’s

Ablaze : gay (not canon)

Trickee : bi (not canon)

Branch : bi (not technically canon but it’s so heavily implied it’s crazy 😭)

Hype : aroace (not canon)

Boom : gay (canon)

Ships

(Warning these are my ships not everyone will agree)

Ablaze x trickee

Boom once had a small crush on Floyd and cried when he remembers (I don’t ship boom x Floyd btw sorry😞)

That’s all

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

My memory is terrible so I wanted to do a breakdown of my stuff every once in a while. Might be monthly, might be whenever I feel like it. Also there are too many shows on and something is always finishing or starting so a month is a lot.

BL - Currently Watching

1000 Years Old [2/12] - It's silly, and entertaining and makes me laugh. The friend group is delightful and I'm having a good time watching them. Was excited for a minute when Yo suggested a haircut for Pun because I cannot handle that wig. 🤞

Anti Reset [5/10] - This is one of the most frustrating shows I've watched in a while. The show doesn't seem to settle on what is actually trying to say about the AI of it all, and when it says something I'm not crazy about it. Why is it so frustrating? Because they are so fucking endearing when they're together on screen. I wanna love this show so much.

Cherry Magic Th [11/12]– I love them so much. I'm fascinated by the choices that the show is making. As a big fan of the manga and the jbl I came into this with reservations and this show is just blowing my mind. This was the best episode 11 of all time and Tay/New are delivering. My heart is so full with this.

Cherry Magic Anime [7/12]– Another helicopter ride! Yay. The date song was hilarious. We're now getting to the point where they are dating and Adachi is feeling guilty for lying so I'm curious how the show will adapt the next phase of the relationship.

Dead Friend Forever [10/12]– Glad to see we are all on board with Tan's murderous impulses. It's been so much fun having more people join in on the fun. As for me, I NEED White to stay alive. That's really all I want. Getting curious about how Perth factors in to all of this.

My Strawberry Film[2/8] - I feel it coming. I see sadness in my future. But I'm bracing because I'm loving the look of this show. And pining boys are my favourite type of boys. I'm ready.

Ossan's Love Returns [8/9] - The videos messages destroyed me but then that ending made me annoyed. I don't know what to expect in terms of Kurosawa but I hope he's not actually dying and there's a really good reason for all this. Medical mal practice might be the thing. Although as @twig-tea pointed out to me, since it was said in show it might not actually happen. I want happy for the ending anyway.

Perfect Propose [5/6] . Why must I only have them for 6 episodes??? I need more. Kai is everything to me, and that back hug followed by that smile melted by cold heart. Hiro's boss needs something heavy to fall on him from a great height. And please Hiro,sweetie, I need you to eat better and sleep.

Although I Love You, and You? [7/10]- Sakae is letting me down. And by that I mean, the show is letting me down. Sakae needs to put his foot down with Mizuki and go back to being a fool in love with Soga.

To Be Continued [1/8] - It's not amazing. but I'm a sucker for second chance romance and there are two couples so there's a 50% chance I will like this. We'll see. Also, they need to start hiring younger actors for the high school flashbacks. This goes for A Secretly Love too. Having 27 year olds and up playing ten years younger just won't do. It's terrible.

Unknown [2/12] - I'm intrigued. Not completely sold yet but I'm liking it so far. Also nothing would keep me away from watching Sam Lin again.

Also watched the first episode of A Secretly Love and caught up with City of Stars but it's on the 'I need to shut of my brain' schedule so I'm not necessarily watching to weekly.

BL - Finished

Cooking Crush - I will miss all of them. I loved it so much. The whole cut/uncut version thing was annoying and the editing was weird at times but overall this was wonderful. Communication done right. Relationships and character growth was stellar and both couples won my heart. Aungpao really surprised me, considering he was surrounded my pros on all sides. Dynamite was a joy to watch. And OffGun delivering with all the kissing. Everyone should watch this.

The Sign - I mean, what they did to this show is absolutely insane. Not airing the finale like the rest of the show. Having to pay extra for happy ending is ridiculous (although I kinda predicted this and @lurkingshan is my witness. I said as a joke and it turns out reality is a joke.) Then waiting 2 whole weeks for whatever that was. Just the most unsatisfying experience. Go read this from Shan because I agree with everything said there. Also @bengiyo final thoughts here really echo how I felt about this show overall.

Happy Ending - 20 minutes split in 3. Why? No idea. Was it a happy ending? I think so. Was it cute? Sure. Was it great to watch Seong Hyuk again? You betcha. But I didn't love it. I need Choco Milk Shake S2, like, TODAY.

Playboyy - It ended.

Rose Watches OJBL - I feel bad about this. I didn't watch any of the ones I planned to. This might seem like whatever but I've been trying to catch up with awards season films, because since uni, me and a couple of friends always do it and finish it by watching the oscars together and so ojbl was were I dropped the ball. Gonna restart soon though.

Not BL - Watched this month

Night Has Come Death's Game Shop for Killers

That's it for right now. As usual my ask box is open for gif requests and any other questions. All my gifs are under #rosygifs.

Have a good week💜

[bucketspammer4life]

how i think the boxers were like in their teen years

was resting bc im sick but punchy men cant wait

Glass joe - was wayy more optimistic and cheery, knew how to cheer himself up, also dyed his hair blonde & lightened it pretty often so his hair was crusty and broke like glass (pun very intended )and hated his childhood photos, used to make fun of people who wear turtleneck sweaters but that didnt age well, looks back at his teen years with sadness

Von Kaiser - was very stern & cold, had a very shitty mustache and a bowl cut, wore actual boxing shorts before his overalls, had very oversized boots that he still wears today because he grew into them, shrieks in embarrasment anytime someone pulls up his teenage photos

Disco Kid - actually used to be a dancing coach and primarily did boxercise, once he started boxing he dropped boxercise and went all out on boxing, used to grow out his hair but cut if off since it distracted him, had his natural hair color, looks back at his teen years with nostalgia (and regret since he cant really cut back on the hair dye now, got into it because of joe)

King Hippo - was actually very tiny, Just shot up in height someday during his teen years, also had a light er voice and a crown that was wayy too big for him, it was passed down from his dad so he still has it & loves it with his entire heart, his boxing shorts still fell down a lot though, looks back at his teen years with joy since he thinks he used to look adorable

Piston Hondo - had longer hair and used to strut his shit, was more of a dickwad, had a belt and did less meditation, mellowed out pretty well since he used to go nuts in the ring flying from place to place, rolls his eyes anytime someone brings up his teen years

Bear Hugger - had a baby face and couldnt really grow a beard, so he had his cheeks pinched very often, used to be happy and still is happy, also met mrs bear's mom at this age during a foraging trip, looks back at his teen photos very happily, if he could go back in time he would pinch his teen-selves cheeks

Great Tiger - his magic sucked ass, his clones were distorted, kept flickering in & out of reality and couldnt stay more than a few seconds, didnt have his mustache & had a buzzcut so he looks back at his photos with anger because of his shitty hair when he didnt have his turban

Don Flamenco - wasnt balding & had longer hair that was wavy, used to be smaller so he was underestimated a lot, had just started bullfighting on the side, looks back at his teen years with sadness, mainly for his hair and lack of anger

Aran Ryan - OHOHHOHH this man wins the award for the worst teenage photos, he had a skaterboy era and the worst hair ever, had a very shitty beard that was growing only on one side, anytime someone pulls those pictures up he runs away

Soda Popinski - Literally unrecognizable, had light brown hair & a buzzcut, didnt drink much soda except for rough matches and was built like a twig, once he started upping the amp on the soda his hair fell out a bit and he got ripped, looks back at his teen photos and laughs at his buzzcut

Bald Bull - oh you think the current bull is scary? You should have seen him then!! He had curly hair and was small but a lot faster, he also headbutted people a lot more but stopped because of health issues, his hair fell out from anger & ripping them out from stress, looks back at his teen years with nostalgia because he missed having hair

Super Macho Man - Literally your average surfer dude, went for the dilfbaiting when he turned 29, dressed like a fratboy and had blonde hair + used spray tans, looks back at his photos and calls himself "gnarly"

Mr Sandman - was wayy tinier except for his arms and used to have glasses, he switched to contacts after having his 19th pair broken, likes making fun of his old photos, also had braces so he was the 🤓 emoji irl for a while