#Time to go full steampunk

[alexis-royce]

Chapter Three. Homoerotic naval warfare time, but it's twice over not zailing familiar waters.

[firewoodwander]

My brain is so FULL with wanting to write, it always gets like this around this time of year, either winter is my Writing Time or it’s because I have so much other shit to do, anyhow what a shame it is that I have so many DEADLINES

[liulith]

We as a fandom need to open our hearts to the insane comedic potential of Sir Pentious being included as a background character in stories taking place in the "old days" before Vox and Alastor's falling out. AND the comedic potential of one-sided Sir Pentious -> Vox.

Why?

Canon!Sir Pentious is attached to his era's aesthetics but he also wants to be "hip and cool" (see pilot episode; Sir Pentious as the how do you do fellow kids meme) and join the "Almighty Vees". When did he start wanting that? He's not a media demon trying to keep up with his audience and be a likeable public figure. He's a mechanic trying to conquer Hell by force thanks to his machines and obviously relishes in acting like a villain (fear me! I'm so evil! I'm the architect of destruction! etc. etc).

This is very different from the Vees' approach - maintaining a perfect public image, insidious manipulation tactics... Vox threatens Alastor in the show, but the Vees clearly haven't built their power through turf wars, which is and has always been Pentious' one and only strategy. All the machines we've seen him make are war weapons (+ the Egg Boyz who do his bidding, and help him operate those very weapons). Voxtek probably sells weaponry too but that is more Camilla's domain, so it would be more logical for Pentious to try and join her.

Pentious' and the Vees agenda and interests aren't aligned, so why is Pentious so desperate to join the Vees?

there are many reasons why Pentious could want to be part of the Vees besides the one I'm gonna talk about but you know what MY agenda is:

Vox is Pentious' idol. Pentious is an inventor, an innovator. He would have loved waking up in Hell with a mechanical body he can upgrade however he wants and finds the whole concept fascinating.

He's not against new technology, as his creations clearly go beyond what people could have had invented in his time despite their "steampunk" aesthetic (see: the effing death ray). So I think his current "limitations" are more a matter of him having to stick with what he knows best because it's hard to keep up with the constant stream of new tech. This is why he's more than impressed with Vox's extraordinary ability to adapt to change and master new technologies again and again. He's a fellow innovator! That's one reason for Pentious to be obsessed with the guy.

And if you think obsessed isn't the right word, think about this: Sir Pentious repeatedly challenges Alastor to fights even though he's clearly outmatched and it's an incredible risk to take considering what Alastor does. Pentious is OLDER than Alastor, he was there when he broadcast the most powerful Overlords' scream all over Hell. Plus, losing always leaves him in a very vulnerable position (without his best weapons). Is it madness? Hubris? An obsession for Alastor? No!

Sir Pentious to Alastor: Silence! Now Cower! For when I've slain you, the Almighty Vees will finally acknowledge me!

Sir Pentious thinks defeating Alastor is the only way the Vees will finally acknowledge him. No matter how dangerous it is, he has to try, for the Vees (Vox). Just like he took the risk of angering the Princess of Hell to get in Vox's good graces. This says a lot, for someone as paranoid as him, who doesn't trust anyone who is "too nice" to him.

If Hazbin had more episodes there should have been one about Pentious struggling with the fact he disappointed his idol and told to KHS 👀

(btw this is old news but we know that one of the Hazbin episodes that Viv originally pitched was about a science contest organized by Voxtek in which Pentious and Baxter competed against each other! Pentious could have done that after ep2!)

Anyway, back to the comedic potential of it all & Vox's arrival in Hell. Can you imagine his reaction as a newly fallen Sinner, when he's hanging out with Alastor (aka following him like a lost puppy?) and he meets Sir Pentious for the first time? Like sure, Hell is full of insane people but Alastor obviously has a Reputation and no one ever challenges him. And suddenly... Hm... Alastor?? There's an airship with a giant cannon pointed right as us?? Firing a DEATH RAY?!

It's also so funny to imagine Sir Pentious being obsessed with Alastor and considering him his archnemesis back in the day, only to slowly become obsessed with Vox instead and only caring about defeating Alastor because he thinks Vox will like it. It starts with Sir Pentious trying to "gather intel" on Alastor's new "ally", spying on them or sending his Egg Boyz to do so (and we already know great he is at spying so you can guess how that goes lol), and the rest is history.

Alastor loves attention so he probably let Pentious spy on him behind bushes from time to time if only because it's very entertaining to watch him try to be discrete and make his shadow tap on his shoulder. How hilarious would it be if Alastor noticed Sir Pentious' growing crush on Vox but not Vox's crush on him? Also, Vox misunderstanding Pentious and Alastor's relationship and thinking Pentious is a weird obsessive ex... The world is a stage and the stage is a world of entertainment!

[novlr]

6 more writing playlists for theme, mood, or specific scenes

These playlists are an eclectic mix to inspire you across a variety of genres, styles, and themes. Got a character starting a semester at music college? We got you! Do you need to encapsulate the spirit of 1960s counterculture? Sorted! There are even some genre-specific playlists to inspire your next Fantasy or Steampunk project, a collection of emotional songs for when you want to break a character’s heart, as well as a mix of lo-fi tracks with an urban feel that you can use to write quiet night scenes, or as an ambient soundtrack to some night time writing sprints.

Writing a Semester at Music College

This playlist, with its modern Jazz vibes, will help you perfectly capture and write about the life of a student at a music college. With complicated rhythms and virtuosic performances, you’ll be able to write your characters’ whole college experience from dorm room to classroom.

Writing 1960s Counterculture

No matter what genre you’re writing, this playlist is the perfect snapshot of the changing musical styles and social politics of the 1960s for the writer looking to capture the vibe. Whether you’re a non-fiction author writing a book on the time period, or a fiction author writing a thriller with a 1960s setting, this is the playlist for you!

Writing Quiet Nights in Urban Spaces

This collection of minimalist lo-fi tracks has the perfect calm feel for a dark city night. It perfectly captures the sounds of the city going by in the darkness. This is the ideal playlist for writers to imagine a moment of calm in an urban world, whether it’s for your characters, or just as an ambient soundscape for a midnight writing sprint.

Writing Fantasy Battles

If you need to capture the epic highs and lows of fantasy battles, then this collection of instrumental music is perfect. Full of thumping drum beats and virtuosic strings, this is the ideal playlist for both historical and fantasy writers to get their imaginations into gear.

Writing a Breakup

Moody tunes to inspire writers to write about heartbreak and breakups. Let the performances of these singer-songwriters wash over you as you prepare to break your characters’ hearts.

Writing Steampunk

This eclectic mix of Victorian-style instrumental music and cabaret carnival sounds will help you write the perfect Steampunk setting. With elements of melodic, symphonic sounds, ticking clocks, and industrial soundscapes permeating the background of these tracks, you’re sure to get all the Steampunk inspiration you need.

We're always updating our writing and inspiration playlists, so give us a follow on Spotify! Are there any specific playlists you'd like us to put together, let us know.

[tozettastone]

For the prompt ask:

1. Deidara & Sasori are isekai-ed into a fandom of your choice

Or

2. Any Naruto character is isekai-ed into a xianxia story

I'm going with 'Deidara & Sasori are isekai-ed into a fandom of your choice.' Except I actually asked @mixelation to pick the fandom, and they gave me Hannibal. :)

--

Sasori Akasuna, if that's actually his name, runs a tiny gallery that can't possibly be making enough money to sustain itself. It's three floors tall and skinny, built of dark brick some time shortly before the turn of the century, and it stands tall and straight among its huddling neighbours in an out of the way bend of an ill-favoured river, where the smell of refuse rises and falls over the course of the day as the current passes.

Will Graham parks across the river and walks there with his hands stuffed in the pockets of his coat. He is here to talk to the owner, a man with whom it is almost impossible to get an appointment — unless, apparently, you are law enforcement.

The FBI has reason to believe he might be connected to their latest killer.

The reason Hannibal has come along is... less constructive.

"He's a tremendously skilled artist," he says, walking at Will's side with a spring in his step. Will can't equal his enthusiasm, just as he can't equal his hand-tailored woollen coat. "But he speaks to nobody. I wonder if he finds other people distracting."

"I'm not here to talk about art," Will points out. He can't help himself.

He's also not sure that what Sasori does is art. Call him uncultured.

When he makes to Sasori's place of business, the front window is entirely taken up by a taxidermy chimera: the big cat's head separated from the cervine body and a pair of vulture wings that must be almost a metre each. In the gaps, there's a steampunk nightmare of gears and chains and strange brass designs.

It must be associated with some kind of motion sensor set-up, because as they approach, the mechanisms begin to move and so too does the chimera, piece by immaculately preserved piece: the head turns, the cat's jaws open to show long sharp teeth, the wings curve.

"Magnificent," breathes Hannibal. "Look how smoothly it moves: bird and beast all in one. It could be alive."

"It's certainly... unique," says Will, clipping the words.

He flashes his ID to the black eye of the camera in Sasori's doorway, ignoring the way the cat's head follows him from the window display, teeth bare and eyes utterly empty. The intercom hisses with static. The door clicks open, allowing them both into the building.

It isn't noisy on the street, but the second they enter all the sounds from outside disappear utterly. The river, the distant traffic and the crying of the crow perched upon the bridge railing are all equally lost to an oppressive hush.

The carpet is old. The floor creaks. There's a smell in the air of an old place that sees little daylight.

The air is the slightly cool room temperature familiar to conservationists everywhere. A dehumidifier waits like a silent sentinel for when its services are needed. And lining every wall, case after case, shelf after shelf, are relics of the dead.

Hannibal pulls off his dark coat and slings it over his arm, revealing a powder blue, three piece suit that fits him like a glove, and immediately goes to inspect a case full of colourful birds.

Will doesn't remove his outerwear. He is distracted. He spins slowly, taking in the room.

Dead things stare at him from case after case, climbing up the walls. Their veins and bones and guts are all internal machinery now, and their eyes are glassy and blank. Sasori is indiscriminate about his animal models: there are goats and bulls alongside wild cats, bears and the snarling faces of wolves. Some are combined with each other into fantastical chimeras; others are perfectly lifelike.

Will spots a dog. Its face is so well-preserved and lifelike that it might be about to bark.

The centrepiece of the room, standing tall and proud, is a stag. It is magnificent: four or five years old, with heavily muscled neck and shoulders and enormous antlers. It makes no noise, but its ears swivel to follow them through the room, exactly the way a live buck's would.

It sure is... something.

This, Will senses, is Sasori's design. Careful. Precise. A perfectionist. He is exacting in his demands for these works: You will not rot. You will last forever. Or else.

Will licks his lips. He glances at Hannibal. It's impossible to say if he also senses the driven and aggressive personality behind these artefacts. If he does, it won't show.

Will is so distracted by the vast array of creatures that he doesn't immediately notice Sasori Akasuna himself arriving.

The first he knows of him is a sharp voice saying: "Don't touch that."

"I apologise," Hannibal says easily, turning away from a dead lammergeier, which is frozen with its wings spread and its body hunched, as if defending prey. (It is the only bird whose diet is mostly bone. Sasori has made its bones into metal.) "The work seemed very fine, but I'm unfamiliar with the taxidermist's craft. These extraordinary specimens retain more mobility than I've yet seen elsewhere."

He might say he's unfamiliar, Will notes, but Hannibal is undoubtedly a man who has seen a great deal of taxidermy.

Will turns to look at Sasori, too.

Clearly Hannibal has found and sighted the man, but for the space of one whole breath, Will can't even spot him.

It's impossible to tell Sasori Akasuna apart from the rest of the room. In that second, he blends in seamlessly with all the perfectly-preserved creatures on display.

Then Will exhales. That's stupid. He can see Sasori just fine. He's the only other human being in the room. It's not that cluttered.

Although by all accounts he's been in this one spot for almost a decade, Sasori looks no more than twenty. He is a short, slight man with at least one East Asian parent, although he has no obvious accent. His hair is dyed a shade that could be called any number of things — dark cherry, merlot, garnet — but which Will naturally associates only with blood. His skin is as smooth and unblemished, like a doll's.

He's wearing a dark, oversize coat and sandals that reveal his toes, which seems like a strange combination.

"The puppets are built and preserved for performances," Sasori says, turning his face to Hannibal. "Art is my calling."

"So I see! I have heard your performances are magnificent."

Magnificent, yes, supposedly — but also invitation-only, according to both the brief from Jack and to Hannibal himself. Will himself is reassured by this idea, because he definitely doesn't want to watch these dead things all come to life.

"Yes. They are." Sasori's eyes drift from Hannibal to Will and back again.

Even to Will, who can empathise with a brick wall, it is challenging to read any expression on his face. Botox, he thinks. It explains how young he looks, too. A little. If you don't look very closely.

Will tries to match the man to the creations. There's something missing. He can feel it beneath his ribs.

But he's not here to think about what's wrong with Sasori. It's the man's broader network that seems suspect. A small favour. Still, he can't stop picking at it.

What's he missing?

"I have heard," Hannibal is pressing delicately even as Will furrows his brow and tries to make sense of the picture before him, circling around a fever dream of a creature crafted from the remains of a wild cat, a goat and a peacock, "that some performances have a guest list so restricted that the invitees are not permitted to know or speak to one another at all. That they must arrive in masks and veils, and are forbidden to remove them until they leave again."

Will startles and half-turns towards Hannibal. What?

Sasori doesn't even blink. "Yes. What do you want?"

There's a hesitation. The world pauses for breath. Hannibal goes quite still, but Will can see from the set of his shoulders beneath his immaculate pale suit that this abrupt demand has annoyed him.

Presumably he wants to talk for forty minutes about the nature of art before they get to the mass murderer.

"We have some questions about a man who used to live here with you," he interjects, before the interaction can go even further off the rails.

Sasori blinks, eyes rolling in a strange and unsettling display.

Like a doll himself, Will thinks. Then he blinks the thought away.

He can't be a doll. That's... ridiculous.

"Deidara," says Sasori. "What about him?"

He says it so certainly. He has only ever had one housemate here. It's unclear if they were only housemates.

Will takes in Sasori's entire person with a look. He glances around at the displays.

"A fellow artist, I'm guessing," Will says, taking a leap of intuition. Who else would live with a man like Sasori?

Sasori's doll-like eyes fix on Will. "Deidara believes himself to be an artist, yes."

'Believes himself to be' is a strange way to put it. Does Sasori have a leg to stand on, when it comes to who is really creating art? The distance might be very obvious to Sasori himself, but it's not particularly clear to Will.

"We believe he might have bombed a church and killed sixteen people," Will says, watching carefully to see how this statement lands.

Sasori does not look as though this surprises him in the slightest, but it's hard to say if that's meaningful. Sasori has so far displayed the flattest emotional affect of anyone Will has ever interviewed.

It's so marked, in fact, that the ancient reptilian part of Will's brain keeps insisting that Sasori has more in common with his artworks than the other humans in the room. Will would like to rise above the impulse to believe his instincts in this case. Flattened affect is a symptom of a wide array of disorders and disabilities, and none of them are inhuman.

"And?" Sasori prompts. "What questions do you have for me about it?"

There's not even a hint of doubt. Sasori clearly believes his housemate capable of building and detonating a bomb in an act of premeditated mass murder. That's important, too.

Frustratingly, Will can see why Jack wanted him to do this interview, even though on paper it feels like a waste of his time. Sasori is hard to read and very, very strange.

"We'd like to ask a few questions about the last time you were in contact with him."

Despite his entire personality, Sasori seems outwardly pretty cooperative. He has a precise memory, and seems to recall the details of text messages — the pair's primary method of communication, even when they were living in the same house — to the minute of their receipt. He is meticulous.

Will already told the behavioural analysis unit that the bomber was acting out some kind of aesthetic compulsion, but Sasori seems to understand it in more detail:

"Deidara uses art to embrace the transience he believes is the end state of all things by unmaking artefacts in the span of a second, usually explosively," Sasori says. Then, apparently unable to help himself, he adds: "Transience — the art of a single moment — is an incoherent and flawed thesis."

"The simple passions of a mind that cannot grasp eternity," muses Hannibal, running his knuckles over the glass that separates him from a dead monkey, which is trapped, forever, screaming silently in rage. This is a rather romantic assessment, but the statement certainly captures Sasori's attention.

"Yes," he says slowly.

Despite what he actually says, he does not sound entirely as though he agrees with this assessment. It is at precisely this point that Will realises Sasori and Deidara are not artists making ends meet as indifferent housemates. They are life partners of some kind. They are very probably lovers.

Sasori says hasn't seen Deidara for a week. This meets their timeline perfectly. Will doesn't — cannot — trust it. But he can either write the answer down, or he can tell Sasori he thinks he's lying right to his blank doll-like face.

He licks his lips and writes it down.

"Before we go, Sasori," says Hannibal, hesitating before he pulls his coat on again, "will you tell me something?"

"What?"

"Do these chimeric creations represent the pinnacle of your art? Are they what you display at your most secret performances? Or is something more challenging the star of your show?"

There are some dogs who, once they've bit down on a man's limb, have to be choked out before they'll let go. Hannibal occasionally reminds Will of just such an animal.

"No," says Sasori, tonelessly. "The chimeras are not my most important works."

That's when it happens.

It always does, with Will. Eventually.

For one hideous, dislocated moment, Will Graham understands this man totally. He can see what grotesqueries might lie in the workroom above this display, just by looking Sasori in his lifeless face. He can almost feel the hours of meticulous work in his own hands and back and shoulders, turning the coarse materials of the human body into works of art that will last thousands of years at least.

He has no respect for their bodies. He doesn't care about the person who inhabited each physical form at all. They are raw materials. It is the work of his hands that renders them art. His towering ego is in every touch.

For a breathless, hanging second, the hollowed insides and smooth articulated limbs and wired jaws of Sasori's victims are beautiful to Will, too.

Then that second is over.

Will's brain screams that Sasori isn't a person.

This time, Will believes it. Oh, he may once have been human. But he's not, now. Sasori knows it — he's proud of it. And because Sasori knows it, now Will does, too.

Will does not feel sick. Feeling sick requires internal organs. Right now, Will can't feel anything.

"That's all we need," he says, sounding just as flat and toneless as Sasori. The thump of his heart feels strange and hollow, like the heavy ticking of a metronome. Thump goes the meaty clockwork that moves his body, so loudly that Will almost startles at each shocking new beat. "Thank you for your time."

Sasori doesn't say they're welcome. That's because they're not.

When they exit the building at last, the outside sounds are deafening: the river roars, a dog barks. Will's heart is no longer the primary feature of the soundscape.

He goes back to his car, a little too fast to be polite. He sits in the driver's seat and clutches the steering wheel. Hannibal closes the passenger-side door with a thump a minute later.

"An interesting man, wouldn't you say, Will?"

Will starts the engine and gives it a few moments to warm. He talks when he pulls out from his car space and into the sparse traffic of the little-travelled riverside road.

"I'm not sure," he says slowly, "that Sasori Akasuna is a man at all."

"Ah," says Hannibal, unshakable and sanguine as always, "the perennial question of philosophy."

"I was thinking more about... biology," Will admits.

"Were you?" A pause. "And what did you conclude?"

He's a doll, Will thinks. He's a doll and he makes other people into dolls. If you cut him, I promise he won't bleed.

But these are not the kinds of thoughts a man tells his psychiatrist if he wants to keep doing field work. And so Will ignores the great shadow that passes between himself and the sun — the towering shape of Sasori's preserved stag, moving with all the beautiful mechanical efficiency of a polished watch escapement — and instead says, "He's lying about the bomber. They're close."

"Hmm," says Hannibal, as if he doubts it. But in the end he only raises his eyebrows and tilts his chin inscrutably. "I suppose we will have to see."

(Will isn't a gambler, really. But would bet virtually anything that Hannibal will be receiving an invitation to a performance very shortly.)

[ckret2]

There’s something great about the art of Mabel with full bill aesthetic.

Just a totally normal teenage girl going through her "I'm a cat" phase with a jaunty little top hat thrown in! It's called steampunk, she thinks, maybe, she's not really sure how all these cool fancy aesthetics are categorized, she bought the cat ears with the tiny hat at a convention.

Any single item in that room is totally something Mabel would be into—bright colors? Fiber crafts? Exaggeratedly 80s aesthetic? You can justify all of them*! It's just taken together that they start to look suspicious.

*You can justify all of them except the book on pyramids. But maybe she's just going through an Egyptology phase okay, kids do that.

An Egyptology phase at the same time as her cat girl phase and psychedelic art phase and geometric patterns phase and favorite color gold & yellow phase. So what? Get off her back.

[kame-writes]

Some Hazbin Hotel Head Canons I have:

Pt.2

Alastor was both a moonshiner and bootlegger when he was alive. He would have been in his prime during Prohibition, and the hoof prints on his shoes were actually common among bootleggers. They were used to trick police that might try to track them by their footprints.

Those shoes are why he was mistaken by a hunter for a deer. The hunter was tracking the hoof prints.

Mimzys club was a speakeasy, and she was fully aware of Alastor being a serial killer. She used to provide alibis for him when he was alive, which is a reason he covers for and protects her now in their afterlife.

Angel and Husk probably crossed paths in life, but are completely unaware of it. Husk was born and raised in Las Vegas, and the mob was very heavily involved with running most of the casinos. Angel being a mafia son, would have definitely been in Vegas a fair amount before his death.

Sir Pentious used to be seen as a very powerful and dangerous Overlord. Then technology and electronics were introduced, making his steampunk innovation style outdated and people started to see him as a joke. He tried to keep up with the times, but it very bad at it and doesn't understand modern things.

The reason Vox has so many aquatic things and likes sharks, is thematic. The envy ring is aquatic and Vox is a very jealous and possessive person.

Valentino uses his saliva and smoke to make people more pliable and willing to agree with him, this also includes Vox. This is partly how they got together, because Valentino saw Vox as a way to further himself and grow his own power.

Nifftys Soul isn't actually owned by Alastor. She sticks with him because of mutual benefit for the both of them. He's also such a bad boy that she's drawn to being around him and helping him with his schemes.

Husk lost his soul because Alastor made him play an honest game, while Husk was a notorious card shark. The little gold token on Husk's hat is the dealers chip from their game as a reminder.

Husk was not a nice overlord. His redemption is going to rely on him admitting how bad he was in the past and accepting himself as a changed person.

Charlie is the only one who still doesn't realise Alastor is a cannibal. Which is why she was surprised he had a friend in Cannibal Town.

Lucifer knew full well who Alastor was, he was just being an ass. He correctly assumed that implying Alastor was a nobody or not important was the biggest insult he could throw at him.

Angel Dust is always broke. This is partly because before coming to the hotel he was renting an apartment from Valentino with ridiculous rent, and he's still working/paying off his debt.

Before meeting Valentino, Angel was more mafia with his brother. They had a very turbulent relationship, since they weren't very close when they were alive due to Arakniss being more Conservative and serious like their father. They have barely spoken since Angel became a famous porn star, and Angel just assumes that Niss now hates him for being 'an embaressment'.

Part of the reason Angel let Valentino take his soul and lead him to where he is now, is because Val was the only/first person to really encourage Angel's more feminine side and sexuality, and find it attractive. He fell hard for the love bombing, and then had a very rude awakening once Valentino no longer needed to play nice.

Fat nuggets is very special to Angel. He was never allowed pets, and despite him being one of Vals love bombing presents, it reminds him of how happy he was before he learnt the truth about why Val was so loving to him.

[spacebarbarianweird]

Hi there, I had this fun idea - while the tinkerer class isn't playable in BG3, can we pretend for a while that it is? You know, Tav and Astarion both showing middle finger to all the gods... Tav can even help him with his condition. Some gadget blocking the sun, artficial blood, stuff like that. Honestly, the of them being this steampunk couple of a vampire rogue and Tav with enhanced crossbow or a gun has made my day. So - do you have aby headcanons about that?

OR perhaps Astarion and an Alchemist who likes to trick people too if that makes you happier? 😉

You are the first to request Artificer! People forget this class since it's not in the game, though, it's official. But some DM believe the Artificers bring unnecessary steampunk vibes.

There is also some naughty, to say the least, stuff, let me know if you want more of this.

Masterlist

Headcanons

Astarion x Artificer!Tav

In the realm of magic, you are that bitch who brings a gun to a knife fight.

You construct machines and mechanisms out of nothing, enchanting them with unique techno-magic,

Armour to withstand necrotic damage? A healing helmet? A prosthetic hand? A full-time "living" creature, a Nimblewright?

There is nothing you can't do with your crafty hands.

Things are complicated in terms of love.

You are more interested in cogs and gears rather than dates and sex.

You've tried once and it was a huge "ugh".

Virginity is wasted for nothing.

So, you've also learned to make sex toys but it's this side job you pray no one will ever know about.

But customers are never unsatisfied though you sometimes get in trouble.

Mostly, the owners of local brothels try to accuse you of lewd misconduct.

You are finally tired of all this shit and decide to move places.

And the mindflayers take you.

You easily escape, making small machines out of debris to help you survive this madness.

You construct armor, and you enhance swords.

Magic sucks, behold the science!

Astarion makes moves to you, successfully seducing you.

And let's say, none of your inventions have ever satisfied you the same way this troubled vampire does.

You think you are in love. And you believe he is, too.

But later he confesses to you that it was a lie.

He used you. And he is sorry.

You are heartbroken, at the very least. You feel used.

You break up with Astarion, leaving him alone in his misery.

But it doesn't mean you want him to suffer - you kill his master, secure his freedom.

When it all ends, he starts burning alive - running to the shadows, like a rat chased by cats.

You feel bad, especially when you hear vicious mockery from your friends.

But you fail, losing his track underground.

That night, you cry.

The thing is, you've never stopped loving him. You were just too stubborn to admit it. Besides, gods, Astarion tried to be honest for the first time in his fucking life.

And you punished him for opening his heart.

What a vile creature you are?

Half a year later, you meet him at the party.

Astarion looks happy - he is an adventurer and a hero, living his life to the fullest.

And he tells you something that makes your heart stop.

"I wonder if we could be together after all, you know. But it seems like you have a new life, and I am happy for you."

You take his hands in yours and ask him to go somewhere private.

Then, you apologize. You say how much you've missed him and that you love him. And you want to be together.

Instead of an answer, he hugs you.

"There is nothing I want more," he whispers.

In the morning, you leave together to find a place that fits both of you.

Living with Astarion is worth of effort, but sometimes it's almost unbearable.

His nightmares, his breakdowns.

You wonder how tf he survived on his own all these lonely months.

You open your artificer shop in Neverwinter, and Astarion becomes a professional monster hunter.

Thanks to you, he doesn't need to hide in the shadows.

You make him a cape that creates a field protecting him from the sun. The eye lenses to make his eyes green.

You also learn alchemy - first, to make potions to ease his nightmares and anxieties.

Later, you make them to satiate his hunger.

Your crafty hands also come in use in healing his sexual trauma.

Astarion craves intimacy, he wants to enjoy sex. He just can't make himself undress and make love to you.

Problem solved - he can fuck you with a toy you've constructed while being fully dressed and in control.

You also use some of your inventions on Astarion, helping him to reconnect with his own sexuality.

One day, he pins you to the bed, making love to you without any extra tools.

It's been such a wild night that your neighbors "politely" asked to install soundproof shields.

You keep learning alchemy, making more and more potions, and one day you finally get your answers.

There is a way to make Astarion mortal without interfering with dark magic or soul-retrieving pacts.

Science, bitches.

Astarion is hesitant. He is eager to drink any potion you make, but being transformed back into a mortal is very extreme.

You ask Astarion to bring him test subjects.

He drags you a deranged vampire, one of the most miserable Cazador's victims - completely insane, almost an animal, that was hunting in the dark caves.

And it works.

The deranged vampire turns into a deranged mortal. But mortal.

Astarion takes the potion, but, maybe, it's because of how long he's been a vampire or because he's an elf, he doesn't turn immediately.

He falls to the floor comatose.

He stays like that for a month, a terrible and long month when you think you've lost him.

One evening, you hear a strange sound.

Breathing.

He breathes in his unconsciousness.

You put your hand on Astarion's chest.

Heartbeat.

You did it. You cured him.

He wakes up with you on his chest, dizzy and exhausted with some memory gaps.

Piercing you with his natural green eyes.

--

Tag list

@tugoslovenka @marcynomercy @wintersire @vixstarria @not-so-lost-after-all @ashiro20 @theearthsfinalconfession @herstxrgirl @starlight-ipomoea @micropoe10 @astarion-imagine-archive @veillsar @elora-the-slutty-songstress @fayeriess @lumienyx @tallymonster @caitlincat-95 @tragedybunny @valeprati @lynnlovesthestars @marina-and-the-memes @waking-electric @ayselluna @connorsui @asterordinary @darkarchangel96 @locallegume @brainfullofhotsauce @coffeeanddonutscafe 

[a-998h]

Welcome to Hell

Hello @bloobewy, I hope you enjoy this!

TW: reader does "die" at some point but doesn't stay dead technically Reader also gets stabbed in the hand

Clicking Keep Reading means you've read and understand the trigger warning.

I missed the bus, great, I say with as much sarcasm as possible. It was hot, and my body was already a natural heater, and school is draining. Lucky me, the house isn't to far from the school, so walking is still an option. To make the walk less unbearable, I put on my favorite playlist.

After 10 minutes of walking, I reach a crosswalk. Pushing the button, I wait for the sign to change. Once the sign goes from hand to person, I step onto the crosswalk. Having already checked left and right, I thought I would be fine.

I didn't hear it... and that damn truck didn't see me either. I didn't hear anything, but I felt everything. The music cut off, and my body was in so much pain. Why, why is everything fading? I can hear sirens, and begging, and people. Blood... I see and smell blood. I try to turn my head, but I can't. I can't move at all.

"What's happening?" I mumble.

Soon, my vision goes black and I hear a voice. It's a woman's voice, full of warmth and authority.

"Your time has come child, we cannot wait to meet you," I hear her say.

The voices of the people becomes more muffled, and the pain starts to go away. The darkness takes over my vision until I can't see anything. I don't feel the pain, or roughness of the road. I feel nothing at all, like I'm floating. There is nothing in my view but inky darkness, so... This must be how I die. This isn't an isekai, so I'm not gonna go to a fantasy world, I'm just going to die.

I was so bad, fighting, yelling, and being a jerk to people who want to help me. Now, dad is gonna lost his only when they didn't even make it to adulthood.

"I'm sorry dad... I'm so sorry," I say in my head.

It's not fair, first mom abandoned me and dad and now I'm gonna die. Why couldn't I just make it to adulthood? Whatever, I can't change things now. I just wish I had another chance. I see my tears floating in the inky darkness. I don't know why I'm crying, but it feels well deserved right now. As I cry, my eyes closed and I finally feel at peace.

I hear a whistling near my ears, and the feeling of wind? My eyes shot open and I see myself falling. The sky above me is red, and is that a clock tower with an hourglass in it?

it's clear I'm going to crash into the ground of a city, but I have no idea where the fuck I am. Things are in ruins, and I don't seem to be stopping. I scream in fear as I pulpit towards the ground, I just died and I have no idea where the fuck I am!

"Is that a blimp with a ray gun?" I ask myself as I see steampunk blimp of supervillain proportions blast at the ground.

There is a loud smack sound as I hit the ground, and I'm, surprisingly, not in pain. I look myself over, and something is wrong with my hands. They're stained red, not like gloves or splatter, but it's like an ombre.

"Well that's not normal, and where the fuck am I?" I ask myself.

Standing up I rush towards a shop window, and look at my reflection? It has my hair color and style, skin color, eye color, height, but it has a pair of white wings , my hands have the ombre of red, and there is a pair of jagged horns like a four horned ram on my head. I back away from the window and start walking in a random direction.

No one here looks normal, so look like anthropomorphic animals, full animals, of a mix of human and object. Thees people range in size and shape, like normal, but they clearly don't look normal. Walking past the werid people here, a few give me looks that range from confusion, to fear, to cruel. Trying to ignore seems to be my best hope. As I keep walking, I see a bunch of people who look like different types of sharks. They spot me, and I hear them mumbling, before getting close to me.

They introduce themselves and immediately invade my personal space. They keep talking about an extermination, which confuses and worries me. One wraps his arm around my shoulders and pulls me closer, to him. Scared, I try to get away but they won't let me. Well, I'm probably doomed. Swinging my head around, I mange to hit the two shark guys near me in the face. Using th distraction, I run for my life as I hear them yelling after me.

Looking for a place to hide, I duck into a crowd in front of a shop window. It's showing a pale skinned blond woman in a pale red suit jacket, wearing a bowtie with yellow eyes. Next to her is a second pale skinned blonde woman with a creepy smile, soulless red eyes, and shoulder pads. Creepy smile lady calls suit lady, Charlotte, to which suit lady corrects it to Charlie. As I watch, something Charlie says catches my attention.

"As princess of Hell," I hear Charlie say.

Hell, holy shit I'm in fucking Hell! I can't pull my eyes away from the screen, but I have a hard time paying attention to what Charlie is saying. She keeps singing about something called, the Happy Hotel, and how it'll be a place to rehab sinners. Sounds crazy to me, but I'm not the princess of Hell. As people laugh at her idea, I feel a bit more hopeful.

"Seems like the safest place here," I mutter to myself.

This Happy Hotel seems cool, but I have no idea where it is. I scan the screen looking for an address but I can't find one. Annoyed I do my best to avoid people. Looking up at the red sky, I see the clock tower and a large hill with a building on top. I figured the building on the hill is the Happy Hotel. I hear noises from the TV, but I dont care at this point. I just want a safe place to be, but this is Hell so safe isn't really an option. Walking towards the hill some crazy looking dog frankstein's monster woman grabs me.

"Hand over your wallet!" She demands.

I have no wallet to speak of, so I tell her I can't. I'm so close to a safe haven and now I'm being mugged, this day gets worse by the hour. She keeps demanding my non existent wallet, and I keep telling her I don't fucking have a wallet to give her! She starts foaming at the mouth, and I see her brandish a knife. Backing away, I pray she doesn't do anything. But, they go unanswered as she stabs me in the hand before stomping away.

I walk the rest of the way, my shirt covered in blood as I use my shirt to try and stop the bleeding. Reaching the hotel, the sign says Hazbin Hotel but I could care less what it's called. Knocking on the door, I'm greeted with a grayish-lavender skinned lady wearing a bright red hair bow We stare at each other for a bit.

"Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel, my name is Vaggie and you are?" She asks.

"Y/N, my name is Y/N," I tell her.

I swear I see an unknown emotion flashing across her face. She opens the door wider, and I walk in and sit on the couch.

She looks at my hand and offers to bandage it up. I thank her and she tells me it's not a problem. Once she's done, I hear an excited squeal. Turning towards the noise I see Charlie, minus her jacket, looking at me with a smile. She introduces herself and asks If I'm going to stay at the hotel. I nod and say that was my plan. Her smile grows as she asks me my name and how old I am since I looked young. When I tell her I'm a teenager, her smile drops. She looks at me, then kneels down to hug me. I tell her it's ok, and she seems to get slightly better. Grabbing my uninjured hand she points to the other demons and tells me their names.

"Over there is Angel Dust, he's another guest," she says, pointing to a fluffy spider demon.

Said demon looks at me, waves and tries to flirt. Charlie scolds him and says to not flirt with me as I'm a child. He looks at me and laughs, complimenting me for, "a good fucking joke." I tell him it's not a joke and he asks how a kid ended up in Hell. I say I was hit by a truck, and that seems to satisfy him.

"Oh, and this is our bartender Husk!" Charlie exclaims as she gestures to a cat demon in suspenders and a top hat.

I wave to him and he just gives me and unamused look as he drinks from what's probably a bottle of some kind of alcohol. Charlie then gestures to a short red haired woman in an equally red poodle skirt running after a roach with a comically large sewing needle.

"That's our housekeeper Niffty," Charlie says.

I just watch Niffty try to stab the roach, not wanting to end up stabbed agian because I interrupted the werid housekeeper. I turn my head and see a tall man dressed all in red, he has deer ears and a staff the looks like an old fashioned mircophone. I nervously wave to him, and he walks over. Charlie gestures to him and say he's Alastor, the hotel's facilities manager. He gives off an aura of authority and power that sacred me. He holds his hand out, silently askign for a handshake, I follow the silent order.

"Well, it's a pleasure to meet you, my dear. This run down hotel will surely feel more like home with your youthful energy," Alastor says, his voice sounding like it's coming from a radio.

Charlie looks back at me, still with a warm smile on her face, and grabs my shoulders. She promises me that I'll love it at the hotel, and that I'll get to Heaven in no time. I shrug and nervously say thank you, this makes her smile more, if it's even possible. Holding my hands she looks me straight in the eyes. Something feels deranged about her, but I don't know how to place it. All I know is, I'm stuck in Hell with it's princess and her friends. But, I could be worse off than here.

"You're going to love it here! Welcome to Hell, Y/N!" Charlie joyously says.

[the-fiction-witch]

Emergency!

Media Doctor Who

Character The Doctor (11th)

Couple Doctor X Reader

Rating Suggestive

The doctor is moving about the TARDIS console room with a sense of urgency, darting up and down stairs, circling the console, and even going underneath the glass floor. The doctor's movements are reminiscent of an excited puppy or a child on a sugar rush, with boundless energy that appears to be fueled by an insatiable curiosity and a desire to explore.

As the doctor moves about the console room, they carefully gather up tools, parts, and supplies from various cabinets and drawers, meticulously organizing them according to their intended use. The doctor's focus is entirely on the task at hand, and they seem to be lost in thought as they examine each item, considering how it might be used to tinker with the various steampunk-style alien contraptions of the TARDIS.

Despite the doctor's frenzied activity, there is a sense of calm and purposefulness in their movements, as if they know exactly what needs to be done and are determined to do it with precision and care. As the doctor works, the TARDIS hums softly in the background, a soothing counterpoint to the doctor's frenzied energy.

He suddenly jumps as the phone begins to ring,

"Phone! Right, yes! I have a phone!" He remembers forgetting his whole tardis is literally a phone box. He leans his hip against the console arms crossed over his chest as he puts on his best debonair tone. "Hello?"

"Doctor!" Y/n's voice comes through in a state of panic,

"Y/n... What's the matter? What's wrong!?" He jumps to full attention at the sound of his distressed companion, 

"It's an Emergency! You need to get here right now doctor! There's no time to lose!" She said in panic,

"I'll be right there!" He said, he hung up the phone and took the tardis to her stupid apartment as quickly as possible, The tardis immediately Materlalized in her studio apartment, the only light the warm glow of a pink salt lamp, a gentle music playing, a scent of roses in the air. "I'm here! I'm here! where's the emergency?! I'm ready for anything!" The doctor clambers out the tardis sonic in hand, 

"Hi," Y/n smiled,

She sat on the bed with her hair done all luxurious, her make-up done naturally but glamorously, she wore a little blue strap bodycon dress that hit her midthigh, a black button-down shirt tied up around her waist, black tights, she smiled widely and excitedly, 

"Hello, what's the emergency?" 

"There is no emergency,"

"What!"

"There is no emergency doctor,"

"Then why did you call me!" 

"I missed you," she smiled innocently, 

"You- You," He sighed leaning on her bedpost, "You can't just call me up saying it's an emergency just because you miss me,"

She pouts, "Haven't you missed me too," 

He chuckled, "Course I did," He smirked returning his screwdriver to his pocket, 

She shifts up onto her knees and moves closer leaning on the bedpost with him inches from his face,

He smirked and moved closer to her too, "I always miss you," 

"I always miss you too," she smirked holding him by the jaw and tugging his lips to her own, she egarly kissed him and he happily kissed her back putting an arm around her waist, her hands slipped down as their kisses turned heavier into a slow snog, slipping down his neck and peeling off his suspenders, he pulled back and raised an eyebrow at her,

"This why you called me?"

"Mhm," she nodded,

"Come on," he smirked, picking her up and taking her to lay her down on the bed as she giggled full of excitement...

The couple lay closely wrapped in the soft, warm sheets, their bodies intertwined in a comfortable embrace. Her head was nestled gently on his bare chest, feeling the rhythmic beat of his hearts. They were both lost in the moment, enjoying each other's company, feeling the warmth of their bodies as they cuddled and cradled each other with tenderness and affection. The room was quiet except for the sound of their breathing, the rustling of the sheets, and the occasional sigh of contentment. It was a moment of pure intimacy and connection, a moment they wished would never end.

"Y/n?"

"Umm?" she mumbled glancing up at him,

"You shouldn't just call when you miss me you know,"

"I know, but I miss you,"

"I miss you too. But you can just call when you miss me and say you miss me. I'll come running just as fast."

"you will?"

"Course I will," he cooed stroking her hair, "Or... you could just sleep in the tardis with me?"

"I'll think about it," she giggled, "But I like summoning you its fun."

"I'd rather just be summoned from... down the corridor, than from half way across the universe,"

"Less fun," she shrugged giving his lips a kiss. 

[curseddistinguishedly]

E!False vs HC!False is actually really interesting if we look at it through creation VS creator perspective

E!False is a reflection of HC!False‘s flaws and strengths. She acts the way False would in her situation, but she lacks the identity that comes from living experience of which she remembers none. E!False is in constant fear because she’s not in control of her life, she has no knowledge to understand this world, she’s been just thrown into, there are no previous achievements, events, people which would help her identify herself so she has to find these herself, but she’s unable to due to her debilitating paranoia, which ones again is a flaw we can in HC!False. E!False tells us of her faint steampunk memories and evil plans of revenge, but the return of full memory doesn’t do anything for her. She‘s already lost in identity that is not hers but of someone that is the reason for her suffering, and the saddest part is that she doesn’t really have time to explore herself beyond that. She’s broken by HC!False leaving, because that’s the only person who can see her, but she cannot get that closure.

HC!False on the other hand can identify herself and others, she is the 4X times MCC champion, 10+UHCs, one of the earliest Hermits, Queen of Heads Hearts and Bodyparts and also the main narrator of E!False‘s story. She knows everything and the moment she realises that, her paranoia that she had in her first crossover episode decreases by like a hundred. She’s unsure but knows enough that she understands how to deal with things surrounding her, although still with unnecessary caution. HC!False deliberately tries to hide her flaws from the viewer veiling the story to be more about how it was a necessary, not even evil, deed, to exile E!False, supposedly violent, without memories into The Rift, something she knows nothing about. False built her own reflection but the moment it started reflecting her own faults she disregards it as something to be afraid of, and she doesn’t understand (or accept) that she’s part of the problem. HC!False doesn’t see herself in this mirror, she sees something more twisted, out of her control and so she throws the mirror out as if she won’t see it again in the glass window of her castle.

HC!False tells us everything, E!False doesn’t acknowledge the viewer half as much as HC!False does. Instead we‘re shown what she‘s going through but it’s the HC!False that tells the reason for these events, many times contradicting them. Because HC!False would say that E!False is doing good:) and then the next episode E!False is showing us her head collection. And we don’t know why False contradicts the events, it could be lack of knowledge, lack of integrity, good faith and on and on.

The point is — E!False is HC!False, but HC!False isn’t E!False. E!False’s attempts to find that identity beyond are faulty because things outside it require experience she simply never had, but there’s recognition of herself as not a good guy, HC!False either doesn’t have or denies that she has.

I am the shape you made me. Filth teaches flith.

… or whatever

[johannestevans]

all i can say is that when you're talking about gender, my number one tip to improve your dogshit takes and pedestrian analysis is.

gonna talk about "femininity" and "masculinity"?

WHICH femininity? WHICH masculinity? who does it belong to? which androgyny, for that matter?

because when you start wittering on about how "masculinity" is a universal standard, you just sound like some cis person being cringe as ever.

do you mean white masculinity? Western masculinity? gay masculinity? cis masculinity?

a fat person's masculinity, or a thin person's?

because you don't imagine them as the same, do you? there is no universal, single standard for masculinity, and you know that.

let's go further.

what about a comedian's masculinity? you'd agree, i'm assuming, that a comedian's masculinity is different to say, a carpenter's?

what about the masculinity of an office worker, someone with an email and spreadsheet job? what about a posh cunt's masculinity, one of those toffs that's never had a job? what sort of masculinity is that?

what's the difference between a rich person's femininity and a poor person's? someone who works full time and someone who's unemployed? someone who works a hard labour job and a housewife and someone who works in customer service?

what about an emo's feminity, or a goth's? what about steampunk femininity? what about cottagecore femininity, loli femininity, harajuku femininity? Afrofuturist femininity? anarchist feminity?

are they all the same, do you think?

there are a great many ideologies that push and pull with ideals of gender, with expectations of "gender norms", but gender norms are constructs, and are therefore heavily influenced by culture and the individual.

there is no "masculinity", but there are "masculinities"

there is no "femininity", but there are "femininities".

what you think of as feminine or masculine or androgynous, and what some random person on the other side of the world selected as random thinks of, WILL be different, and that's part of what makes gender so interesting

but also when you're making your analysis and you just go "oh this is so masculine" and "this is so feminine", and you're not thinking of say, the era you're talking about, or your own cultural perspective, it SHOWS. and everyone is laughing at ur shit analysis

[ramblingoak]

Building A Family

Another peek into the steampunk Copia fic I'm working on because I can't help myself. Check out the previous story here: Clockwork Friends.

A young Copia (probably about 5 or 6 years old) trying to settle in at his new home.

Warnings: angst, sfw, 1k words (thank you to @gothdaddyissues for the dividers!)

Copia’s oldest clockwork rat is Aldo and he made him when he was just a young boy, barely able to read and write.

After being dropped off to live with his apparent father Nihil, Copia was mostly left to his own devices.  His brothers were busy with their own lives and didn’t want to deal with the burden of another Emeritus heir.  The sprawling estate they lived on was closed off from the rest of the city by high walls that were patrolled by mechanical golems.  Not to mention the reputation of the Emeritus family itself.  Most of the city was convinced they were more machine than human these days.  

On a particularly lonely day Copia found himself near tears as he wandered the halls. He spent the beginning of his life in an orphanage surrounded by other children.  An endless amount of people to play with and talk to.  Here it was just him.  It was bad enough his own family didn’t seem to want anything to do with him but even the ghouls avoided him.  

Copia finally stopped when he walked by a strangely silent grandfather clock.  It loomed over him much like Nihil had done the day he was picked up from the orphanage.  The hands of the clock were still and Copia’s fingers started twitching, the urge to fix it growing stronger by the second.  It wasn’t until he had dragged a nearby chair over and started taking the clock face apart that he had an idea for another purpose for it.

“Can you hear me?”

It was hours later, the grandfather clock now just a corpse of its former self.  Copia had brought all the parts he needed into his room and spread them out on the floor.  A ghoul had come by when it had gotten dark, dropping off a plate of food and getting a fire going.  He had lingered for some time after, seemingly content to silently watch Copia work.  They had only left when Copia found himself getting frustrated when the tiny creature in front of him remained silent.

Tears began to prick at his eyes again and he struggled to keep them from falling down his cheeks.  He was just so lonely, all he wanted was something to keep him company.  It didn’t matter to him whether it was a machine or not.  Right now he had no one.  No friends…no family…just an empty house full of memories he wasn’t a part of.  With a whimper he dropped his head into his hands, his small shoulders starting to shake as the tears started to come in earnest. 

“Try this.”  Copia’s head shot up, his eyes meeting that of the ghoul that had managed to sneak back in.  The firelight danced across his silver mask and Copia shivered when it made it seem like his eyes were on fire as well.  He finally looked down to see a small metal object in its hand, the gold contrasting with the black metal of his fingers.  “This will bring it to life.”

After a few more trips to the destroyed grandfather clock Copia had re-worked his little creation to utilize what the ghoul had brought him.  Copia’s hand shook as he inserted the gold key into its back.  He could hear the gears turn as he twisted it, over and over again until he felt confident it was enough.  As delicately as possible he lowered it back to the ground, afraid to let go in case it didn’t work.  

In case his new friend remained silent.

“It’s ok.”  

Copia looked up at the ghoul, forgetting he had stuck around to watch.  It was impossible to know what the ghoul was thinking but Copia saw something in his eyes that he had only seen a few other times in his young life.  Kindness and understanding shone there, emotions so strong that Copia had to look away quickly lest he got upset again.  He took a deep breath and slowly pulled his hands away, trembling as he waited for something to happen.

It was slow at first, timid as it began to move around the rug Copia was sitting on.  After a few unsure first steps it gained confidence and crept closer to him on shaky legs.  Copia was afraid to touch it, afraid he’d break the spell the small thing might be under.  When a tiny metal paw touched his leg Copia finally smiled and reached down to scoop it up in his hands.

“Hello.”  The small metal rat twitched its nose, as if it could smell whether Copia was a friend or not.  “H-how do you feel?”

The door to his room opening and closing made him look up briefly but Copia didn’t give the ghoul leaving another thought.  He was too enamored by what he had created.  The clockwork rat was busy looking around the room, his limbs still shaky against Copia’s hands.  He was already thinking of ways to improve the design, of how he could make his new friend stronger.  

After a few moments its small body started to stop, the key moving slower and slower on its back.  Copia set it back down on the rug and ran a finger up and down its head.  It was a comforting gesture for both of them and neither one looked away from each other until the key had completely stopped.  

Copia sat back on his heels, his eyes quickly looking around the room as he thought of what he would need.  He had a responsibility now to his new friend.  He needed to take care of it, to make it healthy and happy.  Copia was prepared to do whatever he could to make sure that happened.  With a grunt he stretched out on his stomach in front of the rat, reaching out and winding the key up again.  When it came to life once more it immediately walked forward and bumped noses with him.

“I’m going to name you Aldo, ok?”  The rat's nose moved across his face, the small whiskers he had given him tickling his cheek.  “Welcome home.”

Some more baby steampunk Copia here 💙

If you'd like to be added/removed from the tag list (or if I accidentally left your name off) of this fic or any of my others please leave a comment or send me a dm! Thank you 💙

My Masterlist ~ My Archive of our Own ~ My Ko-Fi Tip Jar

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 10/22/2024

rare tuesdaypost with no fallow sections. i CANNOT find the exact image i am looking for (mouse-drawn person sitting on bar stool with ankles crossed and blushing with eyelashes) but i feel like i found a lot of things this week that charmed me immensely. rare many such cases of many interests intersecting.

listening

almost exactly a year ago i wrote about jolynn j chin's SHIFTED, a piano jazz piece where the time signatures change on every bar, which came with an explainer video that is, spiritually, a physics video.

she's done it again with OFF TIME and a full album of equally bonkers concepts. i have a brain that is fairly good at manipulating 2D things (yarn, fabric) into 3D things but i do Not have this kind of math brain. wild shit.

-

reading

thank you philip for overseeing the photography of this trio of DELILAH DIRK graphic novels from Tony Cliff. i saw these on the library shelf and went "holy shit i read one of these as a webcomic in high school".

very well-paced indiana jones and james bond adjacent pulp adventures, with a soupcon of steampunk conveyances for taste. delilah started life in 2007 when strong snappy female characters were far less common. this is particularly...not quite grating, but very notable in the first two books (published in 2013 and 2016 respectively). they are intended to be middle-grade (disney villain falling deaths, no tits or ass, etc), but they punch far above their intended age range. a particularly interesting reckoning with the long-suffering native guide trope. not a series overly concerned with historical accuracy, although it's certainly more grounded in real history than you might expect of a middle-grade pulp adventure graphic novel. more colonial political concerns than i remembered or expected.

the art is really killer in all three books. tony cliff really knows the effect of a good page turn spread.

he also has a very charming way of illustrating continuing action across a huge panel. all four shots are from The Pillars of Hercules (2018) bc it happened to be the last one i read and the one with by far the most ambitious art.

-

watching

tubi has acquired the streaming rights to most of the batman animated movies. i keep getting served ads on instagram for an upcoming animated film about batman and the yakuza, where the premise is that a portal from real-life japan has opened up over gotham and the yakuza are pouring through like a demonic horde. this seems to be a sequel to batman ninja (2018, dir. Junpei Mizusaki)

Batman, along with his allies and adversaries, finds himself transported from modern Gotham City to feudal Japan.

batman ninja includes the lines:

I’m going to rule this country and turn it into a kingdom of monkeys and rewrite the history of the world!

and

What am I going to do with you, Batman? You’ve destroyed a perfectly good giant robot castle!

i would describe this as more of a feature-length animation showcase than anything else. the haters on letterboxed didn't even give it an average of 3 but that's bc they hate fun. this is some real weeb shit. this is not a grimdark or particularly thoughful batman entry. this is an entry to clap your hands in glee at the giant gundam vs monkey army fight. they have once again done my favorite comics boy jason todd dirty but what the fuck else is new.

so much fun even on just the like tree field guide level of identifying the six or seven animation styles. plus everyone's feudal japan looks are sick as shit.

was it Good? no. was i delighted at nearly every moment? fuck yeah.

-

playing

EXCEPTIONALLY charming embroidery-based game jam game, Cross Stitched by Panzerr here for free on itch.io. made in godot. god bless.

(image from the developer) you've got your little baba yaga house gundam in the center constantly firing projectiles, and you have to keep these fucking birds back. you can WASD around the edges of the tapestry, and your health is in the top (i really love how it gets "ruined" dark chunks taken out of it as you lose health, like a piece of embroidery decaying) and the bottom black bar of motifs fills up as you make progress towards adding another level and another piece to your powerup level tapestry.

(following images from me) you do have to think about your placement and plan it out a bit, and you can't embroider over something you've already stitched. would not recommend surrounding your initial base damage motif with other motifs bc then you've sort of fucked yourself over. a really simple concept (a good bite size for a game jam) elevated by a very fun visual style and great music. really delighted me! i am so jaded by my time in the video game marketing mines that i forgot they can be fun actually!

-

making

unphotographable: too many bugs in my house! tried to replace the weatherstripping on my front door and discovering that both the front door and the storm door were installed incorrectly and should probably be replaced.

in better news, the newest pathetic little waif in the office bathroom has been freshly neutered and will be going to a nice cushy indoor home next week-ish. whenever he is fully recovered. the most polite cat i have ever had in this carrier: did not piss, shit, or throw up.

KO'd by six cc's of various goops. poor man.

[astra-galaxie]

So...quick question. How would you rank each CC game in terms of character design? I would love to hear your thoughts!

Oh! Good question! Let me get some pictures, and I'll come back with my list!

1st place: Mysteries of The Past

I LOVE the character designs of MotP! It does an amazing job at replicating the style of the late 19th century, which it's supposed to be set in, and while some things aren't entirely period-accurate, I love it regardless! Also, the characters' physical appearances are detailed and unique, creating a large diversity among this season's cast.

Plus, Victorian Steampunk is one of my favourite styles (even if I don't wear it), so that's an added bonus for me!

2nd place: The Conspiracy

This season showcases how much Pretty Simple's character designs have improved since its release, as it brought back many S1 characters. The details in the designs are beautiful, and this is also when PS started trying more facial expressions and poses for the characters. This season is a perfect example of how character designs can be improved with practice, so it earned second place!

3rd place: Travel in Time

S6 gets third place thanks to how many different periods' styles it's replicated. We had Ancient Times, the 1960s, the Renaissance, the future, the Age of Sails (which I love pirates, so bonus!) and Medieval Asia. This season had so many unique styles within it that it's only fair it should be in the top three! I think the only reason it's not higher up is because it's shorter than the other seasons, and while I don't know if I would want it to go for 60-ish cases, it would have been interesting to see what other times we could have visited.

(I still think we should have visited MotP during S6, but that's an idea for another time, so I'll shut up about it for now!)

4th place: Supernatural Investigations

S7 gets fourth place, as I love seeing its take on different supernatural creatures. I am a HUGE fan of the paranormal and magic, so this season is right up my alley! While some designs could use improvements (*cough* the demons *cough*), I still like seeing all the different mythical creatures. Regardless of the things I would choose to change to improve some of the characters' designs, it did an excellent job making characters who are so different than what we see in other seasons.

5th place: Save The World

Save The World is when I feel that Criminal Case really started to branch out with its diversity in character designs. We visit so many countries throughout the seasons that it makes sense for the characters to reflect the differences between nationalities. I won't speak for how accurate some of the designs are for all of the nationalities featured in this season, but I think PS did a good job designing characters to represent each country. You can even see it among the Bureau since few members originate from the same country. Overall, StW has fantastic character designs, even if the following seasons have more details.

6th place: City of Romance

OMG! Who would have thought we'd ever see the day CoR DIDN'T come in last place on a list?! (At least I don't recall them ever not being in last place...)

Even if CoR failed horribly at being the final season of CC, the character designs are good. Some characters I like more than others, but overall, they have plenty of details without being overwhelming. Had CoR gotten the chance to be a full 30-case season, we might have seen more characters come back from past seasons and see the design improvements like we did in S5 and S6. Like I always say, CoR had the potential to be better than it was, but at least the character designs weren't a total flop!

7th place: Pacific Bay

(AnxietyFluffy, please forgive me for putting S2 so low on this list.😭)

While I enjoy PB's plot and characters, unfortunately, I had to put it so low on the list since, compared to other seasons, its character designs aren't as impressive to me. Mainly, it's because it's only the second game, so PS was still working on improving character designs. While I can see an improvement between S1 and S2, it's just not enough for me to put PB higher on the list. But, I still think PB did a good job creating diversity between districts, and while I will always question how the climates of these districts coexist, it was nice to see the differences reflected in the character designs.

8th place: Grimsborough

Last but certainly not least is Grimsborough! While it's nostalgic and the game introduced me to CC, sadly, its character designs showcase the fact that it's the first game. I would never say the designs are bad, but they're not as good as they were in the following seasons. There's something simplistic about the designs compared to feature seasons, but I still enjoy them. However, I am glad that PS started making the characters more detailed and unique in the following seasons, and I wish we could have seen more S1 characters come back in future seasons to see how much their designs could have improved.

I loved seeing how PS's character designs improved over the course of their 8 games while staying true to their CC style. I've always enjoyed the style and characters of this series, and it was fun to pick which ones I liked most! I'm sure others would put the seasons in a different order based on character designs, but I'll stand by my choices.

Thank you for the ask, eggsandmasks! You always send me some fun brain teasers!😁

[hockpock]

Glasses Review - Firmoo

Hello vision impaired friends, I bring you the gospel of Ordering Your Damn Glasses Online

I have previously ordered from EyeBuyDirect (luxotica/lenscrafters'/America's Best in disguise, sorry.) and Zenni Optical ( most well known online provider, A+ would recommend) and have seen lots of ads for free pairs from a competitor, Firmoo. I have too much prescription for the free pair offers to ever work out from ANY provider, but their fun designs put them on my list.

When my current glasses broke, I was dinking around and saw their current promotion is Buy One Get One Free PLUS 20% off lenses and as lenses are the real $$$ I jumped on that like tigger on crack. I am VERY nearsighted with astigmatism and the average pair of glasses from lenscrafters used to cost me $300 minimum.

After much deliberation with a million tabs open and a poll I ignored the results of for Reasons, I ordered a pair of clear frames and a pair of purple steampunk-y wireframes . Two pairs of HIGH PRESCRIPTION glasses for $87 shipped. I could cry, y'all.

Note: I have an up to date prescription and a nifty app that measures Pupillary Distance or 'PD'. you will need both these things accurate to have the best experience buying your glasses online.

I ordered them 9/22, they shipped 9/25, I received them 9/29 with regular shipping. They came well packed - each pair was in a bag made of cleaning cloth material inside a sturdy plastic case and they come in a foil bubble mailer.

Both pairs feel well made, with lots of attention to detail-

however I did not pay attention to detail or pay extra money for the Re-he-heaaallly thin lenses. So the clear ones are slightly too big and I hate the way the nose pieces sit, while the purple ones are a wee bit small across the temple and heavy to boot. I haven't had dents in my nose like this since I was 12.

the website lists their exchange policy as 30 days, the pamphlet that came with the glasses says 60. Either way it was pretty painless to go into my order history and select "exchange". The form I filled out with my reasons for dissatisfaction promised me I would be contacted within 24 hours.

My 'personal Firmoo consultant', 'Karen', emailed me with a code for the full price before discount of both pairs + standard shipping, as well as the usual customer service canned answers about checking the sizing information and did I know I could upgrade the lenses?

Also I could keep the failed pairs 'FOR NOW', here are some places that accept glasses as donations. (mixed messages, Karen, but sweet!)

New friends are April006, round anodized wireframes with a cute dingly gem thing, and Sandy020 , literal tortoiseshell cat eye frames.

This time I used the site's search terms to cut the temple width and earpiece length options down and double checked the weight of the base frames. (14g vs 24g for the round wireframes before my coke-bottle lenses. RIP my nose. )

New order was placed 10/5 and they arrived 10/17 . (last time I checked the tracking estimated arrival had creeped from the 19th up to the 23rd so grain of salt. This may be a tactic to make the order feel like it got here faster or legit delays. In my case there was a federal holiday involved.)

Complete disclosure I'm gonna grab a pair of pliers and take the little dangly off the wireframes. It makes a noise when I move my head and if I don't fold the frames in the right order when I take them off it'll scratch up the lenses. I ain't gonna remember to avoid that, so off it goes.

The Good:

Large selection, Good Quality, Good Communication. Lots of Off the Beaten Path options for internet weirdos. Firmoo p much always has a promotion going.

My wallet is so happy. SO HAPPY. Frames run $20-30ish to start. lenses will vary with your prescription and options.

If y'all want 50% off your first frames and to give me a $10 credit they have a referral program and my code is T4Z8I2. BOGO20 is a better value but it expires 11/01/23.

The Bad:

Not flexible about lens options- you go down one track and pick your options within that. If there was a way to put tinting on a pair of glasses other than blue light blocking I couldn't find it. (in contrast I believe Zenni lets you choose a range of colors and tint depth on any pair, designed as sunnies or not)

You Will Get Emails. Firmoo REALLY wants you to buy more glasses and post about it and tell your friends and HERE THIS CODE IS ONLY GOOD FOR 3 DAYS, GO BUY NEW GLASSES. They are marketing themselves to fashionable young influencers who change styles every month. Unsubscribe with impunity.

like Zenni, this is a company with the majority of it's functionality based overseas. It's cheaper because you're ordering directly from a factory and not paying Luxotica's markups to itself. Customer service is mostly English as Second Language speakers and there may be delays.

Not For Emergencies. I was able to coast on a pair of glasses from a prescription or 2 ago but it's gonna take time for your order to be made and shipped.

Overall I'm very happy with them and will probably order again.

Next time I have spare money I'm aiming at Wherelight because y'all. they are next down on the list of reputable to shady AF but they have the most amazing WTF designs.