#This was a lot oh my god but bloodlines is also done too in its own post

[blissfulalchemist]

OC Basics (FC5)

Tagged by @faithchel @risenlucifer @strafethesesinners @unleashedart Thank you all! Tagging: @consumedkings​ @tomexraider​ @ohfaiths​ @shellibisshe​ and anyone else that wants too! (I procrastinated on this so it made the rounds I’m sure)

name: Catlina Mariangel Rojas alias/nicknames: Mary Seed, Cat. In AUs she also has Conejito and Catnip as nicknames. gender: cis female age: 26 (c. 2018) zodiac: scorpio (I lost the image with all their rising and moon stuff so lo siento it’s not happening for these guys) abilities/talents: Cooking/baking, a sometimes unnatural amount of kindness, getting into small spaces, and fairly adept at climbing (She has to reach the top of the cabinets somehow okay) alignment: lawful / neutral / chaotic / good / neutral / evil / true religion: Omnist, grew up Catholic sins: envy / greed / gluttony / lust / pride / sloth / wrath virtues: charity / chastity / diligence / humility / justice / kindness / patience languages: english, spanglish she’s better at understanding than speaking a lot of times family: Dominic Rojas (father), Gina Rojas (mother), Maya and Xandie Rojas (Sisters), Theo Munoz (Husband eventually deceased) friends: Lance Powell, Faith Seed, John Seed, Jax, Trey, and Darren, would totally be friends with the Ryes and Mary May if I wasn’t cruel and had her more cult affiliated.  sexuality: heterosexual / bisexual / pansexual / homosexual / demisexual / asexual / unsure / other relationship status: single / partnered / married / widowed / open relationship / divorced / not ready for dating / it’s complicated libido: sex god / very high / high / average / low / very low / non-existent build: slender / average / athletic / muscular / curvy hair: white / blonde / brunette / red / black / other eyes: brown / blue / gray / green / black / other skin: pale / fair / olive / light brown / brown / dark / other (Honestly depends on the amount of sun she gets) height: 5′ scars: Well okay she gets a lot of them due to her “confession” but prominet ones are the Lust on her right clavicle, the Pride across her lower ribs, and Wrath between her shoulder blades where her heart is. A few from her self injury but nothing more beyond that. features: TINY!, hair with some big curls in it, she does also have a tattoo on her inner right ankle that is the symbol for spirit from ATLA.  dogs or cats || birds or bugs || snakes (They are on thin ice) or spiders || coffee or tea || ice cream or cake || fruits or vegetables || sandwich or soup || magic (If only) or melee || sword or bow || summer or winter || spring or autumn || past or future five songs that remind you of them: “Foreigner’s God” by Hozier, “Flowers in Your Hair” by The Lumineers, “Happier” by Marshmello ft. Bastille, “Monster” from Frozen Broadway Musical, “Dance with the Devil (Aurora Version)” by Breaking Benjamin

name: Chance Jason Ruicknar alias/nicknames: Rook and White Knight (Faith Specific) other than that he does not like nicknames and will remind you. gender: cis male age: 25 (c. 2018) zodiac: scorpio abilities/talents: Science whiz more knowledge in Biology and BioChem, parkour, fishing, a decent musical screamer he kind of practiced a lot in high school not gonna lie. alignment: lawful / neutral / chaotic / good / neutral / evil / true religion: Atheist sins: envy / greed / gluttony / lust / pride / sloth / wrath virtues: charity / chastity / diligence / humility / justice / kindness / patience languages: english and you could make the argument for Latin given his science knowledge, but let’s also be real in that Science is its own language. family: Mickey Ruicknar (Grandfather; Deceased), Ray Ruicknar (Father; Deceased), Andi Greene (Mother), Unknown “Sperm Donor” friends: Boomer, Nick Rye, Kim Rye, Wheaty, Faith Seed sexuality: heterosexual / bisexual(one au verse) / pansexual / homosexual / demisexual / asexual / unsure / other relationship status: single / partnered / married / widowed / open relationship / divorced / not ready for dating / it’s complicated libido: sex god / very high / high / average / low / very low / non-existent build: slender / average / athletic(towards the end of his story) / muscular / curvy hair: white / blonde / brunette / red / black / other eyes: brown / blue / gray / green / black / other skin: pale / fair / olive / light brown / brown / dark / other height: 5′ 10″ scars: 3in scar on the back of his neck just slightly to the left of his spine and then a bunch of other little scars from the Holy War and from his daredevil adventures before everything. features: Tattoo on right hand of the structural formula of acetylcholine. On the left hand he has the written formula of oxytocin and vasopressin on top of each other starting from just above his wrist to his knuckles. He also has another tattoo on his back between the shoulder blades of a rose in front of a crescent moon to slightly resemble the Moon Stick from Sailor Moon. Other than that a mess of curls, scruffy beard that he shaves once its too long because he can’t handle the upkeep, bags under his eyes from his inconsistent sleep schedule.    dogs or cats || birds or bugs || snakes or spiders || coffee or tea || ice cream or cake || fruits or vegetables || sandwich or soup || magic or melee || sword or bow || summer or winter || spring or autumn || past or future five songs that remind you of them: “Christian’s Inferno” by Green Day, “Icarus” by Bastille, “Teenagers” by My Chemical Romance, “Viva La Gloria? (Little Girl)” by Green Day, “Moonlight Densetsu (Sailor Moon Theme)” but like Specifically the Star Locket version that I can only ever find on youtube.

name: Lancelot Powell alias/nicknames: Lance gender: cis male age: 49 (c. 2018) zodiac: Tarus abilities/talents: Mechanics, Wood Whittling, first aid, various weapon types,  alignment: lawful / neutral / chaotic / good / neutral / evil / true religion: Agnostic, grew up around religion but was never anything significant in his life. sins: envy / greed / gluttony / lust / pride / sloth / wrath virtues: charity / chastity / diligence / humility / justice / kindness / patience languages: english family: Sage Powell (Daughter), Cat (Pseudo Child), Unnamed mother, father, and ex-wife. In an AU Wes (Pseudo Son [Sorry I don’t make the rules]) friends: Eli Palmer, Nanette (Yes she would be Nana in ND), John (He’s on thin ice though), Just plenty of people around Hope County he wasn’t the most social but friendly with everyone there for a long while. sexuality: heterosexual / bisexual / pansexual / homosexual / demisexual / asexual / unsure / other relationship status: single / partnered / married / widowed / open relationship / divorced / not ready for dating / it’s complicated libido: sex god / very high / high / average / low / very low / non-existent build: slender / average / athletic / muscular / curvy hair: white / blonde / brunette / red / black / other: He keeps his head shaved down, but it would be greying from a dirty blonde eyes: brown / blue / gray / green / black / other (hazel) skin: pale / fair / olive / light brown / brown / dark / other height: 6′3″ scars: Wrath on his Chest, Pride along his neck on the right side, small and various scars from his time in the military, the Holy War, and just life in general. features: No hair really and no beard. Has the hilt of Excalibur on his right hand with the crests of the knights of the round table encircling his arm, left shoulder has Sage’s name along with the logos of the colleges she’s attended. Looks very angry, but honestly has one of the warmest and kindest smiles. dogs or cats || birds or bugs || snakes or spiders || coffee or tea || ice cream or cake || fruits or vegetables || sandwich or soup || magic or melee || sword or bow || summer or winter || spring or autumn || past or future five songs that remind you of them: “Blackbird” by The Beatles, “7 Years” by Lukas Grahams, “Dear Daughter” by Halestorm, “Wheel in the Sky” by Journey, “Rebel Yell” by Black Veil Brides

name: Lizette Eden Rojas-Seed

alias/nicknames: Liz gender: cis female age: 16 during her story (timelines are hard sometimes) zodiac: Virgo in the old zodiac, the new one she’s a Leo abilities/talents: Guitar, singing, can survive on three cups of coffee and no sleep, Managing to make the loudest outfit possible, Rallying. alignment: lawful / neutral / chaotic / good / neutral / evil / true religion: Unsure but she sways from Atheist to Omnist sins: envy / greed / gluttony / lust / pride / sloth / wrath virtues: charity / chastity / diligence / humility / justice / kindness / patience languages: english, spanish (Not Fluent during her story but for sure more than her mom) family: Catlina Rojas (Mother), John Seed (Father), Trey (Uncle). In AUs her father changes and in BnD verse she gains a brother Daniel. friends: Valerie. If she was in Hope County she’d be friends with Carmina but I am unkind. sexuality: heterosexual / bisexual / pansexual (the label she uses once she’s an adult) / homosexual / demisexual / asexual / unsure / other relationship status: single / partnered / married / widowed / open relationship / divorced / not ready for dating (says her parents jokingly kind of)/ it’s complicated libido: sex god / very high / high / average / low / very low / non-existent build: slender / average / athletic / muscular / curvy hair: white / blonde / brunette / red / black / other eyes: brown(other verses) / blue / gray / green / black / other skin: pale / fair / olive / light brown / brown / dark / other height: 5′6″ (Thanks for the height John!) scars: A scar on her upper lip from the bullying of kids when she was ~6-7 years old  features: Curly Hair, dimples, bright smile, dark circles under her eyes due to very little sleep (could give some of my mutuals a run for their money), Make up is always looking like it’s from the 60′s and 70′s, just the loudest prints and colors when she can. dogs or cats || birds or bugs || snakes or spiders || coffee or tea || ice cream or cake || fruits or vegetables || sandwich or soup || magic or melee || sword or bow || summer or winter || spring or autumn || past or future five songs that remind you of them: “Nina Cried Power” by Hozier ft. Mavis Staples, “Disco Medley” by Selena, “Bennie and the Jets” by Elton John, “These Boots Were Made for Walking” by Nancy Sinatra, “Cleopatra” by The Lumineers

[rosencrantzsguildenstern]

sasha 3, 15

THANK YOU BESTIE you're my favorite person forever i'm kissing you on the lips

3. [Choose a character] (so, Sasha for this) switches classes. What kind of skills would they now have, and how would it affect the game?

okay so this is a fun thing you've stumbled on because i actually have thought a LOT about sorcerer sasha! given she has. uh. mysteriously missing parents, the logistics of that work quite well and it's not a stretch lineage-wise. also, it gels really well with her backstory- maybe even works better than canon! in canon, she was exploited for her skills as a rogue, locked up and forced to do the jobs she was asked to, before being further trained as a high-society infiltrating spy/weapon. now imagine if she was a sorcerer- someone with very impressive natural abilities, a REALLY strong reason for why it was her specifically that got that treatment.

regarding the skills part of it, bloodline is a bit more complicated- i haven't thought about it too much, and while undead WOULD work quite well, i don't want its wires to get crossed with the revived-by-mr-ceiling thing? but, if, say, after that, she'd taken a level in undead sorcerer, that could work really well! (but does contradict the fun backstory thing i've got going on). another thing that fits sasha PERFECTLY is the shadow bloodline; it's got a lot of kind of rogue-like skills that fit her and her background, and the description is "you are often sullen and withdrawn, preferring to skulk at the fringes of social circles and keep to yourself, cultivating an air of mystery and majesty that is all your own" which. come on. that's literally also a description of sasha. (minus the majesty- her charisma's too low for that... oh god, sasha playing a charisma-based class would be SO badly balanced.) i could keep going on about bloodlines because oh my god, there are so many. it's insane. i have to play a sorcerer sometime. imagine the OPTIONS.

in terms of gameplay/plot, it wouldn't effect too much positively, because there'd be 2 sorcerers? like, she wouldn't be able to do anything new. when i've imagined this situation before, i came up with sorcerer specifically because i was imagining hamid would be something else and everyone would kind of switch around. (god, imagine a 2 sorcerer 2 paladin party... hell!) as a rogue, sasha's done a LOT of useful stuff; they'd be imbalanced, like they were in shoin's, and honestly? might have straight up died in kew. sad but true!

15. What’s a headcanon you think about all the time but feel you’ve never had an opportunity to share? (Again, about Sasha.)

regarding sasha specifically, i did get to talk about this one just the other day on the creating the line server, but half-chinese sasha is very close to my heart! copying some of my thoughts from that server, rq team has a habit of only mentioning character races when they're not white which is like....... :/// not great but it does let me go oh okay so there's no specifics and there is description like 'short black hair which spikes up in all directions' which ok as an asian person let me tell you my hair is spiky as fuck and its BECAUSE of my ethnicity! i always draw sasha as half-chinese and it works very well and is fun to draw/adds some diversity to your 'all the pcs' type lineups.

also, beyond that, i think it could be definitely part of why she looked up to bi ming gusset so much? (+ it's why i went with that specific ethnicity, which happened to go pretty well with her canonically being quite pale (which would contradict something like indian 😔) and her hair). like, she's half chinese, a lot of her family is white, a lot of british people in the 1800s in general are white, but then she meets someone who shares the same experiences and cultural heritage and also. like. is nice to her. regarding that though also, it still makes sense that she could be mixed because other london is CANONICALLY a fairly cosmopolitan melting pot, in 'the way that upper london isn't', which also lends some additional context to the Bad Time sasha has in upper london. #mixedsashaagenda FOREVER i will not rest until my influence can be seen in every rqg fanart THANK YOU.

[onlyhereforangst]

WWR

I’m baaaaack bitches 😘 let’s be honest the last two episodes were shit & you wouldn’t have wanted that wwr anyways. SO let’s get into the ✨angst✨ that was Nick’s episode under the cut…

Oh but before I start, why yes, yes I called this theory too. Me and this writer share a goddamn brain or something because I’ve literally always guessed big plot points of his episodes correctly 😅

Ok Nick’s dad leaving like that, with poor bby Nick all sweet asking if he promises to bring him back his favorite pastry and him hesitating before he’s going to promise- NO. 

*picture Michael Scott gif here*

It’s not faaaaaair, little Nick deserved so much better- so MUCH better. And it’s only going to get worse as the episode goes on, so strap in for the walk down emo lane. 

Quick pit stop for cute banter because duh. Nick giving the real estate agent Ellie’s number cracks me up because bro you want this house with her don’t you 👀 you still keep her business cards on you when you could have just as easily gotten your own (or McGee’s) by this point 👀 you just want to maaaaarry her and move iiiiiiin with her I knooooooow it 👀 Ellie’s reaction the split second we see also has me dying because she’s like ha ha this is funny you had to talk to real estate agent you drew the short straw hey wait what the fu— you did not! Before McGee interrupts any protest she can hurl back Nick’s way and that’s just gold right there. Pure middle school flirting as per usual for them and I love it.

Oooooooh Kasie’s lab scene. The growth in this one. Nick worried his family and by extension him, is going to get implicated for murder (or is guilty) even though it sounds outrageous to him, he’s got PTSD from Mona Lisa (and who wouldn’t tbh). But Ellie immediately, like IMMEDIATELY goes and defends him. Is like uh-uh don’t even GO there, it’s not a possibility its just person of interest I don’t care if it’s literal hair at the scene of a man stabbed brutally seven times, he’s not a murderer. The grooooooowth Ellie, I’m so proud of you 🥺 we went from using that logical head to realizing it’s ok to listen to your heart and wade into situations with empathy (especially for the boy you ~*looOOoOoOve*~) And then Nick talking about his dad being dead and a deadbeat and walking out when he was 5, he looks at Ellie almost the entire time, only barely glancing over at McGee like he needs to have that connection with her, she grounds him when this is suddenly very jarring having a relative by semi-involved in a murder. And Ellie isn’t the slightest bit shocked when Nick dumps this news so clearly she’s heard it and by her look, not only has she heard this, but she does not like the man for what he did to Nick. She looks pissed his father hurt Nick like that because how dare any one hurt her man 😤

And oh here it is, we back on emo lane. Nick recognizing and seeing his dad for the first time in 30 years. It’s gonna hit like a 🎵freeeeeight traaaain🎵 at first he can’t even believe its him, he blinks like a thousand times because *surely* his eyes are deceiving him and then his dad goes and uses his nickname, his nickname people the CRUELTY. YOU DON’T GET TO JUST SHOW UP THIRTY YEARS LATER AND CALL HIM BY HIS CUTE LITTLE NICKNAME YOU GAVE HIM AS A CHILD. YOU DON’T MIGUEL. NOT IN THIS GD HOUSE. Ok and now nick is in pure shock because he just got confirmation that his dad is not only *not* dead, but he’s here in front of him, in DC no less, possibly a murderer no less. AND he’s finding this out by chasing him down *not* by Miguel reaching out to him while in DC. The shock and confusion and hurt my poor baby.

And when that shock wears off and it’s just barely contained rage, my heart 🥺 so of course Ellie goes in there with him and nows she needs to immediately be the support she knows he needs but he won’t admit to needing. Nick tries to deflect with a joke at first but oh honey it’s no use. But quick comedic relief for us on emo lane “sit down, no I don’t like sitting” AHAHAHA like father like son I’m cackling because the look Ellie and nick share and nick’s eyes warn her like don’t you dare fucking say it and she’s like yep yep nope I wasn’t gonna say a damn thing I’ll just look down and try to contain my laughter because now is NOT the time. But see I’m on my couch and I can laugh all I damn well please at this scenario that was gold from the writers thank you. On a more serious level this probably hurt nick even more seeing that he’s even got the smallest something similar to his dad. He’s probably desperate to be the exact opposite, he doesn’t want to even consider being capable of what his father was capable so this - while seemingly insignificant - thing like not wanting to sit in a chair will hit deep for him without him realizing it. If something so trivial is the exact same, wouldn’t something much much heavier like commitment to relationships and family be the exact same? Wouldn’t it?? And good god poor nick for going through that mental anguish, on emo rollercoaster lane. Because it just gets better when Miguel’s excuse for being in DC is “visiting family” like call your BULLSHIT Miguel you certainly ain’t visiting family and Nick now knows oh he lies too, great, another win for the Torres blood, fan-fucking-tastic. 

Quick peek at viewing room and we don’t believe in personal space, Ellie wants to be as close as possible to her hurting bby 🥺

But back to the emo stuff - Miguel just lying off his ass and Nick fed up with his father’s games because it’s truly just twisting that knife in his back that’s been stuck there for 30 years deeper and deeper. AND THEN Miguel has the audacity to yell out for “Nico” like bitch you do NOT get to call him that either. You walked out on him and never came back gtfo. And Ellie is trying so hard to keep it together but man she wants to do one of two things if not both at the same time - wrap Nick up in her arms and shield him from this deadbeat and/or punch this man through the glass to cause just a fraction of the hurt he caused Nick. But instead she just has to keep her cool to be the supportive girlfriend she is and ask nick what he thinks and then. Then. “He’s lying…because his lips are moving”

Well FUCK. Murder me right now. The anguuuuuuuish. Poor five year old Nick in a 35 year old Nick’s body. That little boy who was promised a big hojaldre in the morning from the next town over is right there. Right there to witness the father he thought he had, hasn’t changed. One of the only memories Nick probably has of his father is him leaving. Him lying and leaving. And what does he do when he finally shows up again? 

HE LIES AND LEAVES. HE FUCKING LIES AND LEAVES. (I know I’m getting ahead and technically at this point we don’t know he’ll leave again but whatever sue me because this shit is too much.)

Side note: Ellie talking about a “conflict of interest” that Nick didn’t interrogate his father is laughable considering she should have never interrogated Xavier but ok. 

Ooooo lets see some pissed off Nick. Let it loose baby, you deserve this. And I know I wrote about this in the tags somewhere but can we take a second to appreciate McGee’s growth??? Like bro went from straight up denial to acceptance and giving Ellie the look of “go talk to your boyfriend ok we need to make sure he’s alright and we both know your support is going to go a lot further than my support” and Ellie wordlessly kNOWS EXACTLY WHAT HE’S SAYING. She’s like yeah, of course I’ll go help my man why wouldn’t I. 

I don’t know why but Ellie asking Nick if he’s talked to his “mom and sister” is just so 🥰 I can’t explain this one to you but I love this dialogue ok. Actually I love this whole ensuing conversation. Nick still is bitter (he has every gd right to be), Ellie playing the supportive girlfriend but *tiiiiiniest* bit of devil’s advocate with saying he might be innocent. Once again, so much growth because honestly she knows what it’ll do to Nick if his dad actually *is* a murderer. Like can we for a second imagine if his dad actually was guilty, right? Nick already saw he was like his dad in trivial things like not wanting to sit in chairs. Nick has already had serious, serious doubts to what he’s capable of aka worried he could, if the right buttons were pushed, be a murderer on multiple occasions. Ellie has been there with him for all of that, she knows how low his confidence is when it comes to his perceived “goodness” and she knows just how much it would break him if he learned his direct bloodline IS capable of murder. She knows how he’d spiral if that was true and so she’s gripping to any small possibility his dad is innocent. But nick, oh poor Nick my heart- he’s done. He opens up to Ellie without literally any prodding. He’s baring his long buried soul to her, that troubled, broken childhood that he surely keeps locked away in fear of letting anyone see a weakness. He bares it without question because he feels so safe in her presence he can let her in to see his deepest shame and by extension his deepest worry 🥺🥺🥺 and poor Ellie, she’s a little lost at how to go about helping him because she does have a good relationship with her dad, so yes all she has here for him is saying his father was guilty of a crap dad but it’s because she’s still trying to convince them both he has to be good. He has to be good for Nick’s sake. Buuuuuuut it doesn’t really work does it, because oh shit pissed the fuck off Nick is a site to behold isn’t it 🥵 kicking down doors once again and his smart “still think he’s innocent” oooooooo damn. Ellie’s face says it all- she’s trying so hard to hold out hope for Miguel, so hard. She needs him to be innocent she’s willing to speak it into existence a thousand times but her face is like fuck this is going to kill him and I can’t do a damn thing about it other than just watch. 

More pissed off Nick 🥵 but when you think about it is so so painful, all I can picture is that little 5 year old boy who woke up the next morning waiting, waiting, and waiting. Staring out the window at each car that slows down but ultimately passes. Tugging on his Mami’s shirt asking for the hundredth time when papi is coming back from the bakery with his hojaldre, oblivious to the tears that are slowly sliding down her cheek because she still can’t find the words to tell him what she knows deep down. That little boy who when the sun starts to set the confusion sets in with it. Why hasn’t my papi come back yet? Where is he? He promised. The sadness and sense of rejection that starts to fill his little heart when his mami tucks him and his sister into bed and he asks one final time where papi is and will he say goodnight to them and his Mami has to say she’s not sure when he’s coming home and quietly to the side, “if he’s coming home.” The little boy who weeks later has finally abandoned watching out the window every, single morning. The little boy who had his heart ripped out and thrown to the side of the road when he realized his papi didn’t go to the bakery and instead he was thrown out by his father like a day-old hojaldre. So yeah pissed Nick is fine af but good god the angst underneath is suffocating. Because Nick in this moment doesn’t know the *true* reason Miguel left. He knows what he lived and what he lived is a piece of shit. Nick’s response to “is that what you think of me” is amicable because OOF he could’ve gone the fuck off right there and told him what he really thought of him but he stuck with only a slight dig. TO WHICH MIGUEL. FUCK YOU MIGUEL. IT HASN’T HURT YOU MUCH. FUCK YOU MIGUEL. FUCK YOU. SOUNDS LIKE YOU WERE A SHIT DAD SO YEAH PROBABLY A GOOD THING YOU LEFT. THANK HIM NICK WITH YOUR FISTS BECAUSE HE’S A LITTLE SHIT. FUCK YOU MIGUEL. TOUGHENED HIM UP SO MUCH HE SHUTS EVERYONE OUT. YEAH FUCK YOU. 

And then man here is the point where it all just muddies in Nick’s mind. The poor dude. He knows this line of work, hell he was undercover for almost a decade. He understands how that leaves almost no room for a family. He gets it, so deep deep deep down a tiny part of him realizes why Miguel likely *thought* it was ok to ditch his family. But for thirty years he’s felt abandoned- no reasoning can change that. 

“It’s good to know he was making a nice living while my family was starving” fucking GET HIM NICK. Damn I wish Miguel had been in the room for that. He deserved to hear that one. Ruthless. 

I do not know how I missed this the first time around but holy shit Nick asked to be removed from the case. Nicholas Torres- a man who does not back down. A man who bullied his way into finishing his first ever case with this team that he was arguably way too close to that one too. This is how much pain Miguel brings him. A man who does not quit, not in his vocabulary - was so pissed at getting sent home back when Reeves died, he asks to get sidelined. He actually asks to get sidelined. Holy shit Miguel did a number on Nick and I mean we knew this but 🥺😭😭 poor bby. No wonder you don’t trust yourself in a serious relationship. It’s not the girl you’re worried about it’s you. You don’t think you’re capable of staying, you’re terrified you’ll be just like your dad and leave. once again, you’ve seen the similarities with trivial things and so this just cements your fear of failing at commitment. And this is Nick in just so much pain he asks to step back. oof. I do love Leon stepping into a slight fatherly role for Nick right there though, he shows his support, his pride in Nick and in that moment I think Nick realizes while his father by blood is shit, he’s got several other strong role models in his life that care and that’s why he agrees to work with him. 

Nick’s smarts comment about leaving the note behind 🤣 oh classic Torres move. Also do yourself a favor and pause it on Ellie’s reaction to him. GOLD hahaha she’s like ooo-kay did you really feel the need to say that, let’s not. Honestly I think I’ve given this look to my husband almost daily. They married y’all. 

So married that she overhears Miguel trying to talk to Nick and her hackles raise!!! She’s like hold the fuck up do not traumatize my baby even more, Nick do you need me??? Because I will get you out of this, I will be here for you, I will fight this man, just say the damn word!!!! And Nick ugh, his look. They can communicate with just a simple look, he knows all that she would do for him in that moment and still nods her off, but that tiny bit of gratitude is present. Then we find out that yes Grace is really good at guessing theories “in order to keep his young family safe, it means he has to leave. Of course he can’t *tell* them why he has to leave so that they continue to stay innocent and safe. So he plays it like he’s a deadbeat dude who was “too young” to be a father and is just now realizing it and leaves his wife, little daughter & son behind. Flash forward thirty years and the NCIS case leads them to him. A piece of evidence pops up with his alias, they go knocking down doors to interrogate a potential suspect (Nick’s father) before our lovely CIA agent interfere and claims he’s innocent because he’s a CI…” like DAMN, I’m good. Hahaha any ways the reason I bring this up is because I feel like I predicted/analyzed Nick’s feelings really well back then in this theory and after seeing his expressions, they hold true. Nick is just absolutely warring with himself during this explanation, searching for anything to confirm his dad truly is a deadbeat (and yes he is still absolutely a piece of shit for what he did, but there’s a “good” reason for his leaving and that’s what makes it so- hard.) and as I said when I first broke this down, Nick understands undercover work and his dad (being the POS he is) brings that up to Nick. Like he should “get” it because wouldn’t he do the same thing since he’s in that life? But here’s where (and Nick doesn’t totally realize it yet) Nick and Miguel are different. Because Nick came back, Nick stayed. He stayed y’all and he says it here but he does not realize the implications of his words quite yet. He is NOT the same as Miguel. Yeah he doesn’t like to sit in chairs but he has stayed. He has stayed through some tough shit too but he’s stayed nonetheless. More than Miguel could ever fucking say, that’s for sure. So yes, when Nick has the come to Jesus and realizes that he is not the same as his dad and he can and will stay? Damn I can’t wait for that moment. Also I wanted to slap Miguel when he called Nick “mijo” because BITCH YOU DO NOT GET TO CALL HIM THAT. YOU DO NOT GET TO CALL HIM YOUR SON. NO. “I’m not perfect but I did the best I could” well fuck you too Miguel because look at this broken five year old boy inside a thirty five year old man’s body. Does that look like the product of a “best you could”?? Does he look “ok” to you??? Fuck you. 

But yes here’s my take on where Nick is at: how do you forgive someone you’ve despised for thirty years once you know they “didn’t have a choice” (even though it will always feel like they had a choice or they could’ve explained it to you even if you were only five) and left in reality token you safe and give you a better chance at life? How do you reconcile the real dad and the one you lived with in your head for so long?? How???

And then you’re stuck still reeling from the night before and the bomb that was dropped and the reconciliation you’re attempting to your dad bringing in the ONE THING. The ONE THING he promised to bring home in the morning thirty years prior. How the actual fuck does one come back from that. Can I give another big FUCK YOU to Miguel Torres? Because seriously??? Why do you ever think that’s ok??? Hey I promised my kid I’d bring him hojaldres in the morning for breakfast thirty years ago so may as well make good on that promise right, only thirty years late that’s totally fine right? He won’t tell the difference right?

Fuck you, Miguel. 

And they’re still clearly Nick’s favorite because he’s brought Jimmy to a restaurant specifically for them and that just makes my heart break for the man he had to become without a father. He still held onto that love for them even though they were probably always associated with a horrible, horrible memory of being abandoned 🥺🥺 god damn Nick you’re so broken I’m so sorry. 

Ellie is still as supportive as ever and good god we clearly have lost all pretense of personal space at this point, what is her we don’t know her isn’t this normal for coworkers? But this conversation implies he called her after his talk with his dad and ugh yesssss 😩❤️ I still think he called her immediately after leaving the building, talked the entire car ride home and while getting ready for bed, needing the comfort of her voice on the other end of the line as he worked through his whirlwind of emotions and tried to come down off the cliff he felt himself on. All pretenses of a bad boy with a mysterious flare forever gone, his heart is open for her to see and he doesn’t give two shits about it anymore. But Ellie does a damn good job of girlfriend duties here and not only supports him but also gently prods him to see if he can maybe one day have a relationship with his father. The parallels she brings up makes him think (and also makes him look at her lips twice 👀 he’s just so close to her how could he not I mean right 😅) and I love that she’s still being v supportive but also trying to help him grow. 

And then Ellie giving Nick the option to go with his dad or go to the other location because she’s not going to push anything on him he doesn’t want and then when he chooses the embassy to avoid his dad her reaction had me laughing 🤣 but she respects it. And yet shortly after Miguel tries to team up with Nick and Ellie hears it from the other side of the bullpen, immediately all ears to step in if he wants to avoid him again despite giving him flack for it earlier. Nick can sense her worry and support and this is the moment he takes her advice in just a tiny step and accepts teaming up with his dad. But OMG KILL ME WHEN NICK THINKS HIS DAD IS DEAD BEFORE HE GETS TO TRY AT A RELATIONSHIP AGAIN. HIS WHISPERED “papa’s” I CAAAAAN’T. 

Ugh and then his last conversation with his dad while Ellie is checking on him constantly. It’s just too much, that little boy is back, desperately hoping for his dad to stick around. And Ellie is just so happy she can’t contain it for him and it’s perfect. He walks right to her, her hand on his back because they just need to touch each other after such a heavy couple of days and Nick echoes her advice back at her because he’s showing he listens and he values her insight and I just love it. 

AND THEN MIGUEL HAS COME TO RIP MY HEART OUT BECAUSE HE’S A PIECE OF SHIT REMEMBER. 

My poor bby Nick’s face when he realized his dad LIES AND LEAVES. REMEMBER. HE LIES AND LEAVES. God Wilmer killed it because Nick is literally on the verge of tears and my heart breaks and then yes he goes to Gibbs to see his pseudo-father who he then realizes is more of a father figure than Miguel will ever be and hell that’s okay but STILL. 

I will end this WWR with a I love supportive girlfriend Ellie and another big Fuck You to Miguel Torres.

Goodnight.

[falcor-thee-luck-dragon]

Rough Night

Bucky Barnes x (f)werewolf reader

Summary: Your life is already so weird, thankfully Bucky loves you through it all.

Warning: fluff, reader being a sass master w/ no filter

side note: couldn’t think of any cool avenger powers and then brain went werewolf so here we are

Masterlist

If you had a dollar for every time you’d ended up in the woods with ripped clothes and no shoes, well, let’s just say you could probably afford a real nice two bedroom apartment in some real pleasantly fancy building with a great view and all. Too bad green doesn’t just rain down from the sky every time the full moon comes round to knock you back into another world of blurry confusion.

You won’t lie to yourself, being what you are is strange and not very common in the slightest, obviously. It’s even weirder that you weren’t bitten one night and turned just like that, oh no, all passed down through the bloodline of other strange relatives. So you’re gifted with the curse, forced to inevitably change into a furry beast every single full moon, so what you’re still a mostly pleasant individual.

Well luckily for you, being born with the gift does happen to have its perks which do come in handy. For instance, you’re incredibly strong, quick on your feet, and have heightened senses, plus the ability to shift on command. It’s not all bad, well......most of the time.

Honestly you truly thought life couldn’t get much stranger for you and your whole hidden secretive situation, until low and behold some random red head found your little hideaway in a remote mountain side village far off in the Himalayas.

Everything was completely fine and under control and then BAM, she showed up with some important documents and something called an Avengers initiative and well shit, guess some time spent with the real world couldn’t hurt. I mean come on, some more friends seemed like a nice idea and uh, somehow they knew who you were so too late to run and hide.

Also at the time, considering you lived like a recluse on the edge of the village and of course for good reason, but damn if the red head didn’t just hand you an open invitation for some real adventure. Who were you to say no?

Fortunately for you, all seemed to go in your favor and fantastically enough, they had a nice big strong cell for you on nights when the wolf was inevitably bound to come out. A fridge full of plentiful snacks, a training room to lay off some steam, and a big safe and secure room all your own. It was perfect. Only problem was, there happened to be a very attractive and very wary of you super soldier who undoubtedly caught your attention.

How could you not, he smelled divine, muscles for days, thick thighs that could make a girl swoon, and he just seemed like the best goddamn hugger alive. Okay listen, maybe you were touch starved and deprived of human affection but dammit if your little monster heart didn’t skip a beat every time he was near you.

And yes, the few months it took to get him to crack was just down right torturous. But with some coaxing from Steve and encouragement from Sam, the winter soldier at long last did talk to you. Turned out he thought you were scared of him all along, how hilariously ironic you thought when he told you that.

But as time progressed and you both opened up more and more, a blossoming relationship sprouted forth, eventually evolving and manifesting into a big beautiful flower called love. Cheesy yes, but you couldn’t have dreamed of anything better.

And seriously, he wasn’t freaked out about your whole hidden hush hush secretive gift that usually either goes in your favor or ends up causing you major legal trouble. The man himself, Bucky Barnes, thought you were a marvel to behold, so odd and fantastic that he couldn’t stay away even if he tried.

And for that you could love him forever, especially now after a full moon while you’re out in the middle of nowhere. Hoping that the team will send your hundred year old boyfriend out to find you in the brisk dark morning after a grand unrememberable adventure. Which would be very nice of course, considering you have not a damn clue what you’ve done.....or where you are.

Cracking your back, you stretch your hands up to the dawning sky as a tired yawn escapes you. It’s been a long night and you look like a wild woman with your hear a fluffy nest and your clothes ripped in various unrevealing places thankfully.

Your surroundings are simply trees and small scraggly bushes, green grass underneath your bare feet and a small stream flowing in the near distance. With a second to listen, you can hear a highway a couple miles away to the east, guess that’s a start.

Rubbing your eyes you set out in that direction for about twenty minutes before a blue and gold Mercedes comes into view from the side of a country back road, it stops when you guess the driver spotted you from the tree line. Keeping a wary eye on the fancy sports car, you keep walking towards it until a figure gets out and leans against the passengers side door all cool and casual, then on further inspection you realize the driver is Bucky.

Yes! My knight in shining armor is here!

Trudging through the grassy field in the dewy morning light, he watches your every move, eyes crinkling in amusement as you come to stand a couple feet in front of him. Undoubtedly looking a bit wild, and very tired as you fold your arms underneath each other, giving your dark haired lover a shy almost fangy smile.

“I know I look like a hot mess.” You mutter with a shrug, biting your lip as you dart your eyes to the fields behind him, slightly embarrassed of the current disheveled state you’re in.

Bucky smirks before pushing himself off the car and engulfing you into a big Bucky bear hug to your pleasant surprise, “Y/N I’m just glad you’re okay and nothing bad happened to you.” He mumbles into your shoulder as you press yourself closer to him, letting yourself have this wonderful moment to relax and feel at ease.

Slowly pulling back to look up at him, you smile, “Aww Buck you were worried about me?”

He returns the grin, leaning down to press his head flush against yours, “We all were, me more then anyone else of course...and maybe for the general civilians nearby.”

You laugh nervously, “Oh right, yeah. Well hey, I didn’t destroy anyone's car this time. I think I’ve made progress.”

He pauses for a brief moment indicating he’s not sure if he should tell you something and this does make you nervous before Bucky finally lets out a little laugh, “You ate a whole cow Y/N.”

Snorting in surprise you quickly pull your head from Bucky’s, “What? Did I? Please tell me you’re joking.”

“Yeah, uh I wish.” He admits with a casual reassuring squeeze to your arm, “We tracked you with Sam’s suit tech, yunno Red Wing, and uh....you seemed to be having fun.”

Mentally and just about physically cringing at yourself, you purse your lips together in slight embarrassment, “Shit. Was it gross?” You ask, making a face that causes him to chuckle.

“A little.” Adds Bucky with another casual shrug to make you feel less terrible.

“Is the farmer going to see everything, I mean shit they’re gonna be so pissed.” You worry, biting your lip anxiously as you break eye contact from him. “Why am I like this.”

“Uh, that’s not going to be a problem.” Inquires Bucky causing you to find his blue eyes once again.

Eying him up suspiciously you raise a brow, “And why’s that.....Bucky what did I do?”

Taking a breath he gives you a small apprehensive smile, “Y/N...you uh, kind of ate......everything.”

“I what?” I did not! No way, right?

Giving you a quick kiss on the cheek he smiles affectionately, “I’m going to be honest with you here it looked like a kid with a piece of cake who has no impulse control, and loves cake....like a lot.....Rodney almost puked.”

Rolling your eyes you fake glare at him, “Oh god who all watched my little horror show?”

“Mostly everyone.”

“Jesus.”

“It’s like a car crash Y/N, we don’t want to watch but we can’t look away. Sorry doll.” He confesses apprehensively, though honest and sincere knowing you do feel bad for what you do when out of it.

“No.” You say honestly, pausing for a moment, “It’s fine. Seriously Buck, I’m just relieved you guys keep taps on me while I’m out, god knows I can’t help what I do and where I go. It’s nice to have people making sure I don’t injure any innocent bystander.”

“Yeah I guess so huh...alright Y/N/N,” Chirps Bucky with a beaming grin as he attempts to shift the mood to a less dull one, “let’s get out of here, I mean unless you want to sniff around the place for awhile...it is a nice forest over there and all but I guess we can stay and I’ll let you...”

“Alright Barnes, can-it or maybe I’ll bite you.” You tease with a playful squeeze of his bicep before breaking out of his strong grasp.

“Depends on the context maybe I’d enjoy it.” Adds Bucky sarcastically, side eying you with a half smile as you move to open the car door.

Shaking your head in playful disapproval you lightly shove him aside, “Believe me you wouldn’t.”

——

The ride back to the Avengers base or headquarters or facility, who the hell knows at this point, was actually quite smooth and peaceful. Then again you fell asleep as soon as Bucky made it onto the highway, and continued to catch a much needed nap for the next hour ride home.

No one ever said you were easy alright, but let’s be real, Bucky would let you put him through anything and he’d be happy about it.

After parking and walking down the sidewalk past some early morning trainees catching a run, the two of you made it into the Avengers official HQ where all your rooms and other luxury’s are located. But of course not before walking past the facilities giant living space and huge kitchen.

Just keep looking forward, keep walking, walk faster you idiot!

“Y/N!” Shouts Sam in that stupidly peppy obnoxious early morning voice of his, no doubt gaining the attentions of Steve and Natasha who are seated at the kitchens bar talking about some mission report.

Pausing in the large doorway that’s not giving you or Bucky a whole lot of hiding space, you take a deep breath before turning to acknowledge him, “You’d think people would be sleeping considering it’s only six in the morning.”

Chuckling, Sam raises his protein shake, “Weird,” He says while giving you a knowing smirk, “we missed you during training this morning.”

Nat and Steve conceal their amusement as you simply roll your eyes, “Yeah well it was a long night.” You mutter unenthusiastically, earning the tiniest laugh from Bucky which causes you to throw him a glare. Knocking that smile right off of his handsome stubbly face.

“Well we got all these shakes here if you two love birds want one. Hate to have em go to waste.” Adds the smiling man with a nod, if he doesn’t just love seeing you looking like shit. No Sam I do not accept this invitation for you to tell me how crazy I look.

Sam means well of course, but damn he loves teasing you in front of Bucky for a fun reaction out of him. And it’s kind of working, but not on Bucky.

“It’s fine Y/N, you don’t have to have one if you don’t want to.” Calls Natasha before taking a sip from her mug. “Just ignore Sam, he’s been annoying since the gym.”

Before Sam’s even able to speak you quickly narrow your eyes at him, holding up a finger before making hasty steps across the room. Stopping right in front of him, “Give it.” You deadpan.

Brows raised in surprise he glances from a confused Bucky, then back to you again, “Listen I only made so much, Y/N this is my breakfast okay you can’t just...”

Ignoring his rushed rambling you pull out the whole glass blender full of protein shake before taking a step back as the whole room goes quiet, then never breaking eye contact you heartily drink up the whole entirety of its cold contents without missing a beat. Yeah, definitely needed that.

After you’re finished you lick your lips in satisfaction, taking a step closer towards a speechless Sam as you set the blender back in its place. Giving him a satisfied smirk before walking back over to Bucky where you tug on his jacket to follow you down the hall and away from everyone else.

Sometimes you can’t help but be a little dramatic.

——

Laying sprawled out on yours and Bucky’s giant mattress, you stare up at the ceiling as he folds your clean and freshly scented laundry, your mind swirling with thoughts of what duties you have to be apart of today. Blah, work.

Sighing gently you glance at Bucky to see if he heard you, not getting anything from him you sigh again with more grandeur this time. Nothing. Rolling your eyes you suck in a deep breath before practically soft yelling out your exhale like the dramatic little beast you are.

Glancing over to Bucky, you watch as he turns around to put some of your pants away in a drawer. Okay then, that’s how it’s gonna be. Quickly sitting up, you smirk a devilish grin before silently reaching over to pick up a small pillow, once in hand you don’t think twice before launching it at full speed directly headed for the back of his head.

But before your decently soft projectile can smack his precious flowing locks does a metal arm swiftly reach up to catch it mid flight. Oh, shit. Bucky’s head turns to you, brow raised at you before tucking the pillow underneath his arm, and going back to his usual domestic duties for the day.

Okay, killer of fun Mr. James Buchanan Barnes.

Frustrated from lack of a reaction out of him, you stand up on the bed like a warrior about to give a great battle cry. Eyeing his cute butt up for a moment, you smirk once again before launching a sneak attack pillow right for his head. It sails magnificently across the room before a metal hand stops it in its place. 

Well, shit.

This time he gives you a proper look, full of mischief and a new profound playfulness that sends an excited thrill throughout your entire being. As fast as one of Thor’s lightening bolts does the pillow soar in your direction, but conveniently for you he’s forgotten just how quick you can really be. This is just what you wanted.

Dodging to the left you watch in almost slow motion as the fluffy cloth just misses your face, instead opting to smack against the back wall with a loud thud. Snapping your attention back to Bucky he narrows his blue eyes at you suspiciously while you let out an admittedly scary villainous chuckle.

Let’s party my love.

He hands you a smirk right before shifting his body to the right, arm cocked back and thrust forward just as quickly, launching his second pillow attack without an ounce of mercy. You see it coming a mile away and as graceful as a dancer do you flip off the bed, landing perfectly on the carpeted floor just as the pillow smacks hard against the door. Thwack!

Slowly standing, eyeing him up like a lioness to her prey, you give him a satisfied smile, “Missed.” You tease.

Letting out a breathy laugh, Bucky takes a cautious step in your direction as he tests the waters, “Y/N what are you doing?”

“Getting your attention you ass.”

Chuckling he takes another step forward, “Was I ignoring you?” Duh, that’s why I, oh wait he’s playing you.

“Well you certainly weren’t doing anything interesting.” You sass as he steps again closer, this time about an arms length away.

The corners of his eyes crinkle in amusement, “Okay that’s fair, but was the pillow really necessary?” He asks, though his tone is still humorous.

Not falling for his alluring charm you tilt your head to the side, a knowing smile breaking out across your face as he tries to register what your true intentions are. “Yes, and so is this.” You quip before dropping to the floor for a side sweep of his legs, in an instant he’s on the ground and looking wide eyed up at you.

God he looks beautiful. No, focus.

“Y/N!” He whines breathlessly, brows furrowed as he holds himself up by his elbows, “Now you’re gonna get it!”

Taking a quick step back you snort, “Oh really now?”

And he’s fallen for the plan.

“Yes, and when I get you, you won’t be laughing anymore.” He grumbles, trying to keep himself from laughing as well.

“Alright then hot stuff try and bring me down.” You snap back playfully as he rises to his feet, “First one pinned has to run with Sam later, and we both know how much fun he is to run with.”

Bringing his arms up into a defensive position he readies himself for an attack, “Yeah, I’d rather not be his jogging buddy today. I mean it is raining outside, but I know you’d look real nice after a wet run.” Teases Bucky with a smirk.

“Touché you smartass.” His lips twitch into a grin as you ready your own stance. “Now let’s dance.”

[garrothromeave]

the hell is mystreet season 6??

(warning, long post ahead)

ok so before i start this

1) ive never posted shiiiit on tumblr before so watch me suffer, im just here to talk about stuff that my friends who dont know anything about aphmau have to listen to me rant about for hours on end

2) i havent seen mystreet in like years (except season 3, i watch that frequently since im laurance and shadow knight deprived) so please bear with me because i might be completely wrong on this lol. it’s just like, pointing out things i remember

3) im sure someones already talked about this but who cares

4) im gonna do this stupid thing where i just explain myself a bit at first, if you dont want to read that just skip to the part where you see “the actual thingy:” in bold and italics 

5) mild disclaimer; i am completely aware that jessica is not a professional writer. i know that she did her best to appeal to her fans, and honestly, respect for that. while this post will come off as aggressive and probably look like hate, that’s not my intention in the slightest. it’s just... intense criticism. im sure y’all probably already know that, but yeah, just stating that anyways. i do believe that jess is doing her best, and in no way do i want to dismiss any hard work she’s done. that being said; prepare for a very strongly opinionated post.

haha watch there be 10000+ typos in this making me look like a complete dumbass

ok here we go 

one of the main reasons i stopped watching aphmau back in 2017 was the mess that was season 4. like, in the first few episodes of the emerald secret, i thought “woah!! this is kinda cool, im a sucker for mystery!” because of course i was, it was something new and something exciting. the only problem i had with it at the time was kim, but that’s just because i always found her annoying and out of place. i just didn’t understand why garroth dragged her along and honestly i still don’t to this day BUT, moving on.

anyways, as the season progressed, 13 year old me was of course just “:0!!” the entire time--that is, up until the reveal of the main villain. i remember watching the episode, seeing the reveal of ein, and then stopping. like, just for a quick break, but i was still just overwhelmingly disappointed. like, and this was the time when pdh was airing and ein just got made alpha (i think?) and i had really really liked eins character in pdh. either way, that really sucked and actually opened my eyes to a lot of things.

one of the main things bein’ the fact that this was supposed to be a slice of life kinda series that decided to take a turn to a more edgy kinda approach. which, i guess i regularly wouldnt mind? but seeing as mcd was kinda bein neglected at the time it just didnt sit right with me. BUT WHATEVER, point is i stopped watching mystreet all together at the end of season 4.

like, a whole year later my brother tells me that shit’s getting intense in season 5 + 6 of mystreet, and my brilliant self decided to give it a shot--but i refused to watch all of season 5, so i only stepped in when ein made an appearance. so whenever that was, that’s where i picked up because i didnt care enough to see 

and y’know--i honestly didn’t hate it at first. in fact, i found it oddly cool. it wasn’t enough to get me into aphmau again, but it was enough to where i was intrigued. i dont know why, but i never watched the finale, so i didnt see the ending until just a few weeks ago--but back then, i thought it was neat. looking back on it however... im just so confused. 

side note: only got back into aphmau this time around because of mcd. mainly because like, i adore the first season and the first half of the second season. and being nearly 18 now, im a lot more appreciative of plot and well-written characters n junk. 

the actual thingy:

ok back on track. imma stop spilling out my story of how i got back into aphmau, and lets just skip to what rewatching mcd made me realize of season 6′s plot and shit:

-emmalyn. how the fuck does ghost even remotely exist? if she’s emmalyn as claimed, then why have we already seen emmalyn in the mystreet universe alive? look i get that creators can do whatever they want with their stories but at the same time please provide some sort of explanation good god. and maybe they did and i just havent seen it, so if there is one--let me know. but until that day imma just sit here confused as fuck

-ok so imma just be real, the whole ‘ultima’ thing is just... not great. in my opinion, anyways. like... i saw someone mention this in another post, but if this ultima stuff was like, a really big deal, why isnt it mentioned in mcd? though i suppose since its a curse of sorts, it could be later on past the time period in which mcd takes place--but even then, how did it manage to make its way into aaron’s family bloodline? 

-WHY IS EVERYONE AT STARLIGHT ITS JUST SO CONVINIENT like what happened to this place being the most expensive shit on the planet or whatever, and how the gang happens to run into like, the werewolf trio and blaze and kai and guy and nate all of these people like god damn life doesnt WORK LIKE THAT 

-im sorry but turning people into relics? thats... thats the best you could come up with? plus, like, how does that even work? in mcd it’s established that relics are separate entitles that choose their wielder, based on a ‘personal’ connection (being a descendent of a previous wielder) or if they’re a good match personality and (i think?) moral wise. so the whole turning-people-into-relics doesnt make much sense to be honest. 

-irene really over here using her god powers to only keep her friends alive like god damn not a great god if you ask me 

-can i talk about how incredibly predictable aphmaus death was? like i just kinda sat there waiting for it to happen and when it did i literally went “haha! wonder when she’ll be revived” because god forbid we actually kill off characters 

-when aphmau + demon warlock fought in the irene dimension there was no passage of time whatsoever in the real world whiiiiiiiiich really bothers me because they fought in there for at least a few minutes

-speaking of aphmau and the demon warlocks fight does it bother anyone else that it had to be aaron who took over the fight?? like we get it hes the big protector blah blah blah but god damn it wouldve been cooler if aphmau had fought this battle as her. aaron fighting this battle was so underwhelming

-...love. like, thats the only thing thats needed to break out of a forever potion? love? LIKE YEAH, GOOD GUYS GOTTA WIN SOMEHOW, but its just so cliche and overdoneeee

-oh yeah and also when travis went bonkers and became the demon warlock or whatever, why’d he only take over katelyn and garroth?? like, zane had been influenced by the potions in the past as well? DONT GET ME WRONG--i do love some good brother edge, but uh, the demon warlock was just bein kinda a dumbass by not possessing zane too just sayin’

-can aaron please go to fucking jail for mass murder now like holy shit, he just got sent home on a fuckin boat. also why did blaze forgive him for killing him thats not even remotely realistic. then again, nothing in mystreet has ever been realistic when it comes to characters and motives and personalities, (cough katelyn being actually abusive and travis being an actual pervert) but yknow whatever

-katelyn and kawaii chan literally added nothing to the plot whatsoever. like lets be real, katelyn lost her personality the moment season 5 started and kawaii chan just kinda sits there :I

-ok im sorry this was bound to come up but cmon guys imagine laurances potential if he was in season 6 like god damn this is beyond maddening. AND YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A REALLY REALLY COOL PARRALLEL?? IF IT WAS LAURANCE WHO SNAPPED GARROTH OUT OF HIS MIND CONTROL THING, because it would mimic laurance’s speech to get garroth to snap out of his rage in season 1, episode 100 of minecraft diaries. like how fuckin rad would that have been? missed opportunity 

-also?? why does kim/ghost know magicks?? like, if i remember correctly, emmalyn is a scholar--not someone who knew magicks. i mean, i guess research? study?? but its been established that knowing how magicks works =/= being able to use magicks. i dunno, just doesnt seem right i guess. maybe its explained, i wouldnt know (yes i know that makes me look like a dick leave me alone)

-melissa should have stayed dead. LIKE, NO, ITS NOT AS SIMPLE AS “haha it takes more than a few bullets to kill me”??? look ive got nothing wrong with melissa (cough lie cough) but yknow it would have just been cool a character... stay dead? for once? its just too fuckin cliche that shes alive god damn

-can i also just say the only good thing that came out of season 6 was travis’ dads sacrifice like damn that made me actually sad

-howww was lucinda turned into a relic. or yknow, anyone else? like im sure they explain it better in the actual show i just dont remember, but its just that easy? turning anyone into a relic? granted, a normal person wouldnt be able to produce a good relic, but idk man. IM JUST SAYING; that the only really powerful relics that aphmau should have been able to wield is the one that aaron + zane produced because shad relic and esmund relic moment. lucinda isnt even like, connected to a divine warrior. ALSO, another point, if its seriously that powerful of a relic getting one from just a magic user like lucinda, why go through the trouble? i mean i guess ofc youd want the “all powerful” one that the ultima produces but i mean damn whats the point

-ok this is just going to bother me but in one of the episodes (i think might have been in season 5 actually) where that like, guardian dude was chasing aphmau and zane and at one point they split up and the dude just chuckles at zane diverting paths and goes under his breath “youre not the important one here”, suggesting that aphmau somehow is? first of all, id argue that any ro’meave is significantly more important than aphmau was, especially not knowing much about her other than that shes with aaron. i might be missing some bits an pieces, but if i was that dude id forget about aphmau and go after zane 

-killing off derek for shock factor sucked, and i know the moment was supposed to be really sad because like “oh :( aarons dad is sacrificing himself for his son” but lets be real dereks still was a shitty father and i dont think his reasons for doing what he did was very good at all

-less about plot or more like: why the absolute fuck did the gang bring kim along instead of, oh i dont know, a life-long friend? like, laurance or dante maybe?? im sure its explained, i never saw aphmaus year or most of season 5, but god DAMN id hate to be apart of this friend group AND GOD LIKE, imagine reconnecting with an old friend who ends up getting closer to your best friends and taking priority in their lives over you (cough laurance) like god damn lol

-im just going to preface this one with: i dont remember everything that’s happened, so if im wrong i apologize in advance--but (you actually can correct me if im wrong and please do) didnt like, irene reincarnate her friends in order to give them better lives? I DONT KNOW IF THIS IS TRUE, ITS JUST WHAT I REMEMBER--however, if im correct, then:

a. why the hell would she bring back someone like zane, or gene, or ivy, etc.

b. why the hell do they all have the same exact names? first and last? again, im aware that the whole mystreet+mcd tie wasn’t originally supposed to be there, but i dont think that means such a coincidence can be excused? its just a bit much if you ask me.

c. why the hell is the fact that (as much as i literally hate this) aaron is a decedent of shad being ignored? like, you’d think that something like this would be something thats actually important, or something the demon warlock couldve taken advantage of. or are we completely erasing every other connections to divine warriors besides aphmau + irene? because even if irene did reincarnate them or do whatever it is she did, does she even have the power to sever the connections between them and their ancestors? my guess is, no.

d. speaking of irene why on earth was aphmau able to talk to/see irene, they’re literally the same person are they not? did she like, fuckin reincarnate herself without actually doing it?? BUT--i will give it to them, the demon warlock did refer to aphmau as something along the lines of being “one of the 3 parts of her broken soul” or something like that. however, my point still remains. also what are the other two did i miss that or is it never explained

now; if irene in fact did not ‘reincarnate’ her friends then please ignore that little bit right there :)

but yes, those are a few of the problems i have with season 6 off the top of my head. i would go into like, season 4 and 5 more as well, but i honestly didnt feel like it. at some point i might go into other things, like how important laurance could have been to the plot of these later seasons, or HELL, even dante. i might also go into what could have made season 4, 5, and 6 actually good--maybe... a rewrite? perhaps? but im getting too far ahead of myself, so i just leave you with this for now.

and i know that as soon as i post this 15 more things are just going to pop into my head BUT im going to try and not edit this post because why stress myself with that even more

anyways thank you for coming to my tedtalk 

[dicedungeons-and-dragons]

Scales

Note: As most of you know my campaign has well as truly taken over my life and I’ve been writing little (and not so little) stories based around it. And I’ve decided to post them from time to time, they’re going to be tagged ‘cotd fics’ if you want to blacklist them, I’m also sticking them under a ‘read more’ but I know they glitch a lot so sorry if it doesn’t take. Here’s a little one because I’ve been plagued by the fact that dragon bloodline sorcerers canonically have scales. 

His mother noticed when he was five. 

She found little patches of pebbled skin on his shoulders, along his elbows and knees, and running along his spine. The skin wasn’t red, or itchy, or like any rash she’d seen but she’d been worried and taken him to the local physician anyway. The older man hadn’t known what to make of the tough little bumps either and had given them a special lotion. Waylan got in the habit of putting it on the patches every night and morning, but the pebbled skin never went away. 

***

His father takes notice of it when he’s nine. 

His mother has been dead for eleven months and things are different now. There’s no more music constantly drifting through their home, his father works longer hours, and Waylan is silently expected to care for himself. The expectation is distant. His father doesn’t call him a burden, doesn’t scoff or roll his eyes when he asks for something, but he makes a point of showing Waylan how things are done in the house and where things are so that he doesn’t have to ask for them again. So Waylan learns how to make and tend fires around the house, for warmth and cooking, how to do his laundry, and eventually, where the first-aid kit is. 

He burns his hand on the fire poker, not having realized that he’d left it resting too close to the roaring flame he’d brought to life. His father heard his scream from across the house and he’d come running. The sharp red line already had two blisters bubbling up inside of it and his father had picked him up and taken him straight to the bathroom, setting him on the edge of the tub before rooting around in the small dresser that sat beside the door. He’d put a thick cream on the raw skin, wrapped it, and warned Waylan to be more careful. 

When he’d taken the bandages off a few days later the blisters were gone, but a distinct line of that pebbled skin had risen in their place. 

***

Waylan figures it out when he’s fourteen. 

After his hands catch fire, after he can suddenly hold a piece of wire and talk to someone over a hundred feet away, after he realizes he has magic. And once he realizes it he starts to research, finding scant moments to slip away from his father when they’re in Creta so that he can buy as many books as his bag can hold about the arcane. And when they’re home he reads. He learns about the different sources people have for their abilities. There are people who use words and songs to pull their magic from the strings of the universe, people who through their own means and study are able to learn the craft like a science, people who draw power from the natural world, and people who are just born with arcane magic. Though his mother had taught him to play piano when he was still little he doubts his fumblings there are the source of the fire he can feel burning under his skin. So he figures he must have just been born like this. 

And there are plenty of records of other born sorcerers. There are some who can’t contain their magic and strange, sometimes destructive, things happen around them. But he understands what Sabroth and Dojhan say when they speak draconic and he’s never been taught. And he thinks that maybe he should be more surprised to find out that there’s dragon blood somewhere in his family line. But he’s more relieved just to find some answers. He reads the chapter on mages with dragon blood four times that night. And when he goes to bed he traces his fingers lightly over the raised rough skin along his shoulders and the backs of his forearms. 

Scales. Thin and flesh colored, not the metallic (or dare he think, chromatic) color of his ancestor, but another remnant of them. Something left behind to protect him. 

He stops using the strange lotions from his childhood. 

***

Gadreel doesn’t notice them until after they start to date. 

That’s not a surprise really. The protective patches blend in with his skin, they’re pretty nondescript until they’re felt. Gad’s fingers twitch where they’re curled around his hips, his calloused fingers taking note of the unexpected tough texture. 

“Scales,” Waylan mutters against his throat. He wants to try and press himself closer into Gad’s lap, but he’s still unsure and off balance. The stump of his arm aches and it would really kill the mood if he fell over because he couldn’t catch himself. 

“Scales?” 

“Dragon blood.” He says in draconic, nipping sharply along the edge of his jaw. He taught Gadreel the tongue he’d been given by birthright. “Now fuck me.” Waylan adds in the orcish Gad had taught him. 

He doesn’t comment on the patches of scales he finds as he runs his hands along the rest of his body. 

***

Ray finds out shortly after. 

She is their resident healer, though both Lugh and Vani can make due in a pinch, and he is the resident torture victim. He’s got a lot of healing to do. Ray chatters away at him when he seeks her out to take a look at his arm. She healed a lot of the damaged, closed the bone over the marrow and stopped the bleeding when they’d found him. But the damage to the muscles and nerves required a check-up. So he lets her chatter and waits patiently as she finishes unwrapping the bandages to get a better look. 

“Oh,” he doesn’t look at her or at the rough stump of his arm. His stomach twists and sinks. That wasn’t a bad sound necessarily, but he doesn’t like the idea that she’s surprised by some new development with the injury. “Does this always happen when you’re hurt?” Teeth clenched, he finally glances down at the stump. 

The scales are thicker, thicker then he’s ever seen them anywhere on his body, almost as defined as Dojhan’s. They’re an unhappy, flushed raw color where they’re swelling around the stitches Ray’s supposed to be removing. 

“Never been hurt like this before.” He grunts in response. Ray mulls that over for a second. He wonders what inane thing she’ll come up with this time and half wants to yank away from her touch. He’s not half bad with a medical kit himself, he could probably take care of this on his own the slow way. 

But instead Ray just says, “Tell me if anything hurts.” And starts trimming away the black thread. When she checks the bandages on his chest as well they find a similar line of rough thick scales. 

***

He notices after a few more months of traveling with the party that the scales don’t go back to the way they were before. 

The ones around the stump of his left arm are still thick and rigid, a protective insulation against the potential discomfort of his mechanical prosthetic when he manages to procure one. As are the ones tracing the wound left by Gadreel’s axe. But he starts to notice the scales growing thicker in other places. Along his other arm, down the front of his chest and thighs, spider webbing out from the slash the Crimson Sign left across the hollow of his throat. The more they fight, the more his magic grows, the more scales he feels on his skin. They’re still invisible save for the pink tinged ones that line his scars, but Waylan can’t help but note the changes. 

The scales are for protection and the gods know he could use as much as he can get traveling with this lot. And when he leaves them, leaves Gadreel, only a few days after the winter solstice to travel to one of the most isolated and dangerous places in the world, he's grateful to carry that protection on his skin.

***

He tells Corzaren. 

They’re in the ruined castle, and after weeks he’s finally persuaded the undead creature to remove his armor. Seeing what two hundred years of decay has done to the knight is strange, but in a different way than he’d expected it to be. Waylan had known that Corzaren would be nightmarish. But the skeleton in front of him with red coal bright pinpricks of light burning in its eye sockets isn’t frightening really. Though he wonders if he’d feel differently if he didn’t know Corzaren as well as he does. 

“Can I?” He raises his flesh hand. 

“Of course.” Corzaren leans forward, still far taller than him even without his thick armored boots and helmet, and lets Waylan carefully cup his fingers over the bones of his face. It is strange to see the mandible part and hear the words slip out with no assistance from lips or tongue. The bones are rough under his fingers and the heavy thrum of necrotic energy that keeps the knight’s soul bound and animating his corpse makes Waylan’s hand start to go cold and numb after a few moments. 

“Can you feel this?” He asks, drops his fingers down to the creature’s neck so he can carefully touch the interlocking pieces of his spine. 

“Vaguely. I mostly note the pressure. I imagine I feel your touch as much as you can feel this.” He reaches out and runs his fingers along the metal arm. And the magic and machinery that keep the prosthetic going does transmit some of that sensation to him. Mainly a whisper of pressure, and a slight twinge that he suspects is the arm’s magic reacting to Corzaren’s necrotic energies. But no registration of texture or temperature. 

“Do you want me to stop?” 

“I am content being as close to you as I am able.” That makes his heart do a funny thing behind his ribs so Waylan just settles for tracing careful fingers along the thin bones of Corzaren’s instead. They feel brittle, like even he could break them without much effort, but when he does press a little more roughly he finds them solid as steel under his hand. Corzaren doesn’t even acknowledge the attempt, and to be honest Waylan wouldn’t have even tried if he thought for a second he’d actually do the other man harm. 

When Corzaren’s touch moves from his prosthetic to his cheek he doesn’t say anything, just leans in to the touch slightly as he continues his inspection of the knight’s skeleton. There’s no flesh left on him, and Waylan’s a little grateful for that. He thinks this would be a lot more unpleasant if Cor looked like some of the bodies mouldering away on the lawn. Instead the old bones are clean, and scarred. A deep gouge in his rib here, a nick along his vertebrae there, and notably a crack, long and thin a few centimeters from his sternum on the left side of his ribcage. When Way’s fingers hesitate there Corzaren says, 

“When Westly finished the ritual he asked me to fall on his blade. He was too far gone to sever his own soul from his body, but if I was willing then he could sever mine. Spare me the fate that was coming for everyone in the castle.” 

“And avenge him and his mother?” 

“No, Westly was a kind man, I don’t think revenge would have ever crossed his mind.” 

Waylan doesn’t say anything when Crozaren’s fingers drop to his throat. He’s not wearing his necklace, and the pale pink scar smiles along his throat. “Same person who did almost all the rest of it.” Is all he offers in explanation. He hasn’t told Corzaren about the Sign yet. He’ll get around to it eventually. He doesn’t flinch as the thin bones run over the scar, but they make a loud rough sound in the quiet room despite the soft touch. The undead creature pauses and then does it again, as if he doesn’t know quite what to make of the discordant and unfamiliar sound. “I grow scales over my deepest scars.” 

“Were you anyone else I would think that was a metaphor.” 

“Good thing I’m not then.”

***

Terran knows he has scales after the first five minutes they speak. 

Which is fair, he supposes, considering the man is a real dragon and an old one at that. He’s been around long enough to have seen other sorcerers. 

(“Do you have any kids?” He asked one day when the thought crossed his mind. 

“Absolutely not.” The other had replied with such an air of disgust Waylan couldn’t be sure it wasn’t intentionally exaggerated as a joke. “I have far more important things to do than contend with offspring or run around spreading my seed like a base animal, unlike some.”) 

Waylan doesn’t realize how nice it is not to have to explain himself until he suddenly doesn’t have to. When they start sleeping together and Terran’s hands find the patch of scales running along his sternum, Waylan's mouth automatically opens to speak. But Terran doesn’t hesitate, just scrapes the whisper of claws between the interlocking pattern before continuing on. He doesn’t even blink. And the thing is Waylan never thought he was particularly self-conscious about the patches, but having them treated as if they are no more interesting than any other piece of skin loosens a coil of tension that he hadn’t even realized was taut in him. Terran neither pays them special attention nor ignores them. And that bland acceptance is something Waylan didn’t even know he wanted. 

Over the course of the next few months that treatment has Waylan not thinking about them as if they’re anything strange or special either. It’s just his skin. Not his skin and the patches of scales. It’s all just him, and it’s no more worth acknowledgement than his eyelashes or fingernails. 

So maybe that’s why he’s so confused when Terran starts muttering, voice low and angry, one rare sunny afternoon as they’re laying tangled in a pile of furs together. He feels the dragon’s fingers on his spine, pressing and pulling at his skin, it’s not painful, but the skin is still tight. The draconic letters he’d had Terran carve into his skin finished healing a few weeks ago, but it’s still tender. 

“What’s got your tail in a twist?” He mumbles into the cradle of his flesh arm, reaching back with the metal one to push Terran’s probing fingers away. “If you wrote it wrong I’m going to kill you.” 

“Oh no pet, it’s worse than branding you incorrectly.” He hisses, smacking Waylan’s hand away in response and putting his fingers back on his skin. “You’re marked correctly, and I’m afraid I’m debating the merits of killing you.” 

A few months ago a statement like that would have actually frightened him. Now, “If you’re going to break up with me at least wait until Corzaren comes back so he can sooth my heartbreak.” 

Terran swats him on the ass. “I’m being quite serious, brat.” 

“Sure, why are you dumping me?” 

“Because your scales are coming in.” Terran half snarls. 

And that does give him pause. “My scales? You’ve already seen my scales.” 

“Not these,” to accentuate his point he grinds his thumbs along the inner curve of his shoulder blades. Waylan makes a surprised sound in the back of his throat, the scales there must have gotten more pronounced because Terran puts a fair amount of pressure when he touches them and they ache as he draws his hand back. 

“Ow.” 

“Suck it up I have bigger problems.” 

“You know what, you’re a jackass, I’m dumping you.” He makes precisely no move to extract himself from the furs and go find his scattered clothes. 

“Your wing plates are starting to grow.” Terran finally says. 

“What?” 

“They serve as a place for you to focus your magic and manifest your wings once you’re able to sustain that kind of power.” Waylan considers this for a moment. He knew that sorcerers like him could eventually learn how to create wings and fly, he didn’t know there would be a physical change to accompany the magical one. 

“Okay, so why are you mad?” 

“Because your skin is pink.” 

“Yes. Sorry I can’t be as sallow and pale as you.” 

Terran pinches the back of his neck this time and Way yelps. “You are my blood,” he hisses in draconic. “And we do not come in pink.” 

Ah. So that's it. “So you’re saying you won’t love me anymore if we clash colors?” 

“I should have known from your affinity with fire.” He laments. “But with your eyes and hair I had hoped. A metallic would be better than--” He lets out a string of curses, mostly in draconic, but Waylan thinks he hears the rough incomprehensible sounds of abyssal thrown in as well. 

“Would you rather I be green?” Like you. 

“That was never a possibility, pet,” Terran finally says, huffing out a sigh before pressing a kiss to the back of his neck. “You’re far too terrible at manipulation and subterfuge for starters.” He doesn’t bother taking it as an insult. “But really? Couldn’t you have been gold? Brass even?” 

“I can’t control my blood.” 

“Have you tried?” They’re quiet for a few minutes. And eventually Terran’s hands return to his shoulder blades and he runs his fingers over the scales again and again. 

“When do you think I’ll be able to fly?” Waylan finally asks. 

“I’m not sure, it’ll depend on how quickly you develop your gifts. But I think you’ll enjoy it.” He makes a soft sound of agreement in the back of his throat. “It will be torture to fly that slowly, but when you can perhaps I can teach you a thing or two.” 

“You’re going to still want to be seen with me if I am red?” 

“I suppose, and if I change my mind swatting you out of the sky will be a very efficient way of solving that problem.” Waylan huffs, but doesn’t say anything. After all, Terran doesn’t stop pressing soft reverent touches to the forming wing plates. 

He’s twenty-one when he learns he’s going to have true scales and the wings to match. And he’s greatly looking forward to showing them off. 

[prettylittlebrownskingyal]

Anime recs (some of my personal faves, not the public opinion, obviously):

About sports:

-Haikyuu (I am caught all the way up to season 4 and I have never been more passionate about volleyball in my life, not even when I played it)

-Run the Wind (it's about running but also...friendship? and motivation to follow your dreams?? I mostly just recall relating to some of the lazier characters and sensing the brotherhood vibes. It feels slow at first, but if you get invested you realize that you've binged the whole thing.)

-Free! & Free! Eternal Summer (you wanna get emotional attached to a bunch of teenage swimmers? I don't know why all these sports animes are about guy groups, but here's one about some divas -I mean swimmers. Quite the lil quaint group of nuggets, I gotta tell ya.)

About magic/supernatural

-Sailor Moon (need I say more? She's our queen and we are never too old to watch her steadily turn from crybaby to warrior of the people. If you know, you know. FIGHTING EVEIL BY MOONLIGHT-!!)

-Avatar: the Last Airbender (technically counts as an anime. Holds my entire childhood, every personality trait I have...for sure came from characters in this show. Iconic. Never loses its charms. Lots of magical realism that is centered on the natural elements of the planet, some spiritualism too. Appa is reason enough to watch this show.)

-Legend of Korra (technically a sequel storyline to Avatar: the Last Airbender, but...it's SO DIFFE R E NT. I was at first put off by my lack of OG characters, but there are so many references embedded in there, and you get to meet everybody's kids and grandkids. Also Korra? The embodiment of female pride and power, nothing will forsake her for long. Kinda STRESSFUL how many obstacles the writers create in a single season...let alone 4.)

-Inuyasha (on oldie but a goodie. Technically the first anime I ever saw...*sigh* ah youth...Anyway, it'sset in feudal Japan, but there's time travel so you won't feel too out of place. There are of course demons and magical priestesses and demon hunters and cranky, frankly exhausted, old women. Has a quality plot line and great characters. There is a new sequel show airing about the future of the characters and their bloodlines, I've only seen an episode or two but the nostalgia alone made me want to weep.)

-Fairy Tail (a CLASSIC. It has magic and dragons and FAERIES and found family and is so loveably chaotic, also: hype af fight scenes)

-Soul Eater (another chaotic group of teens that fight impossible battles, the intro music always hits hard for nO rEASON, a little more blood and angst but not like not enough to cancel out the immense joy/annoyance that is Excalibur)

-Noragami (a new take on the concept of how gods are created, sad boi hours have started, wholesome main characters, the graphics are beautiful, some of the monsters can be a tad creepy - but I'm a wimp so it could just be me)

-Bungou Stray Dogs (I HAVE ADOPTED ATSUSHI. HE IS MY SON NOW, THANK YOU FOR COMING. The art style is one I enjoy, very crisp lines and a good variation in character designs. The protagonist is named Atsushi and he is a golden child who must be protected yet allowed to flourish at all times. There is detective work, some great fights, lots of random character flaws, OH and honey the story line is TWISTY!!)

-My Hero Academia/Boko no Hero Academia (this is the show where my broccoli son goes THROUGH IT literally the WHOLE TIME. A great story of the underdog, and the variety of characters and powers are...*chef's kiss*, makes me want to lowkey live in this universe but the amount of villians... gurl it'stoo much for my weak heart smh)

- Cannon Busters (okay, so I know people have mixed opinions on this one. Lemme say this: the intro and outro SLAP, point blank periodtt. The characters are diverse in color and abilities, it's like wild west meets technofuture meets medieval magic war times. The plotline is very all over the place, but hey it's the journey right. If you don't love SAM and Casey by the end of episode 1 you're doing it wrong.)

-BNA: Brand New Animal (the art style is so freaking cool yet cute we luv to see it. The world building is pretty good, basically it'slike Zootopia, but there are way more issues with this island o animals that have a human form half the time. Our main character is determined and just a tad naive, there is a wolf man with a pet crow and we're all okay with that)

-Sirius the Jaegar (straight up, I have no idea how my sister and I binged the whole show in like 2 days, but we did. Great fight scenes, the is blood but... that's because there are vampire-esque creatures also. The main character's childhood got done dirty, but go off on your origin story I guess.)

About slice of life:

- My Little Monster/Tonari no Kaibustu-kun (a wholesome high school romance with oddballs left and right, but you just wanna root for 'em y'know? A good wind down show. There's a chicken in it.)

- (Kaichou wa) Maid-Sama (an unconventional and lowkey erratic main heroine, the love interest seems weird but you'll adore him by the end, just simple high school shenanigans with ridiculously dramatic conflicts)

Phew, that was kinda long 😓 but those are just some animes that I have watched thoroughly off the top off my head to give you a good variety of options. Let me know if you already have seem any of these. Hope this helps you fight off boredom and repetition. Please tell me your faves, I love hearing about new shows!! 🤩 (And btw, my sleep patterns wrecked, I've been going to sleep at like 3AM 😅 Hahaha, send help.)

love love LOVE THIS!! Thank you for sharing babe ❤️❤️❤️ i actually haven’t watched that much anime so i’m glad to get a rundown on some good recs!

also!! i feel u!! team no sleep ftw

[katsmonsterblog]

Sunflowers in the Cemetery pt 1

OMG okay so... I feel like I have to post this now. If i don’t then this will probably be a full blown novel... and I mean I wouldn’t complain but I have literally been working on this for months. 

So this is a story about two of my OCs :D how they met actually. At over 5k words and 13 pages long, its one of my longest works and I’m so super proud of it you guys.  I came to a stopping point and...While the story isn’t fully done, I’ve decided to make it a part one of however many (pls don’t kill me ;-;) 

Its a bit pg13, mentions of sex and cursing

If you like this then please support me on Ko-fi! And check out my commissions page and my masterlist :) 

Anyways! Enjoy!  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Music pumped through the speakers around the club, vibrating the wood of the floor and bar, a pulsating beat that made you want to grind and sway and move. Well, the music only helped add to the atmosphere of sex on the dance floor, in truth, there was something else that seemed to be at play here. There weren’t many places like this in a smaller city like this one, and it definitely wasn’t the alcohol that brought the demon here. No, it was definitely the sex. A hand clapped him on the back and took his predatory gaze from the crowd of writhing bodies. “You know Andras, I don’t much like demons in my place of business but for you I’ll always make an exception.” The male beside him was a friend of a friend’s, and his club wasn’t one that especially catered to the supernatural, more a way to get food if you were invited to prowl and were smart about it, though Liam had never expressly liked his kind. “Is it because I’m pretty Liam?” Andras smirked, sipping whiskey that would never get him drunk. “Or is it because when I’m here you make more money than you know what to do with?” He batted his eyes as the vampire laughed, flashing his fangs and then leaning into him. “Both. Are you hungry tonight Andi? Cuz I’m starving..” Liam purred, green eyes flashing red, a spark within the depths, and having little effect on the incubus. Andras in turn smiled, though his own deep blue gaze was hard, and rolled his neck….a tease for the male and a little something more. Around them it seemed like the humans grew frenzied in their grinding, the aura of lust rising. Prince was only a title he had once held, but it was a title and a bloodline in itself and Andras came from a rare breed of Incubi, his power and aura like another part of him. Like breathing. It flowed out over the crowd of humans, heightening their touch, their lust... “Don’t call me Andi….but yes I could most definitely go for.... a bite...” He responded with a wicked smile as he looked out to the crowd once more and caught the shy gaze of adoration on a younger male, human but very willing. Ah he knew that look, one that said, ‘oh please come here and wreck me.’ Who was he to deny that wish? “I’ll catch you later Liam.” He said as he slid off his barstool, the picture of liquid heat and raw sex and ...gods help the multitude of humans he’d burn through tonight. True that he could feed on just the lust in the room, the arousal, but it was like water to a starving man. Empty calories, and not only that but it would take longer, even through chaste touch, as skin to skin heightened his ability to use his power. It was so unsatisfying.

Tonight he wanted a full course meal... ~~~~~~~~~~

It was as dawn was just peeking out over the city that Andras slipped out the door of whatever apartment he’d been in, a lit cigarette in his mouth, and pulled on his leather jacket. Not that he needed it, it wasn’t particularly cold and the rain from the night before had stopped, but he had to blend in. He looked human for all intents and purposes, if only a little punk rock for most people’s tastes, fishnets and leather and piercings. 

He took a deep breath of nicotine and tar, not caring about the smell or taste really, it didn’t harm him, but it took the edge off. The humans he'd left in the apartment upstairs were spent, but alive. They'd likely be drained, and deliciously sore, for a few days.  As much as he was down for cuddles after… he shook himself from those thoughts, frowning and turning towards the street. Humans were clingy...and weak… he couldn’t be around them for long without them being addicted to him. Literally. It wasn’t his ego talking either, humans were known for becoming addicted to the use of his power, to the touch and taste of him, to the point they grew mad and fanatic. He had just decided to disappear, a demon’s way of teleporting that they called ‘smoking out’, when movement caught his eye. 

Really, there weren’t many people up at this time of day, so when he turned to see someone staring at him from across the street, he halted. He couldn’t tell why it shocked him at first, people stared at him a lot, but it had always been lust and awe. This wasn’t that, instead she stared at him as though she were staring through him, like she knew him. She was dressed cute, in cuffed jeans and a sunflower blouse, her hair a mess of red curls and something about her heart shaped face and wide eyes screamed innocence. But as soon as she saw that he was also staring, turned in a hurry with her bike and pedalled off. 

He should leave that alone.. really, because from what he could sense in that instant, she was human. But the way she looked at him, could she somehow see him for what he truly was? He blew out a cloud of smoke and tossed the cigarette. This was fucking stupid, it was just some fucking human.

But even as he thought that, he followed after her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Holy cow biscuits. He saw her.... Didn’t he? She knew him, the demon.. Well she didn’t know him really.. But she’d seen him. She’d seen him before she ever saw him. It was difficult to describe, how she knew things before they happened, how faces stuck in her mind only for her to come across them in real life. How her powers were a curse, not a gift, and often not helpful at all.Especially when it all but invited the demon to see her too...

Cassie winced at her own train of thought as she coasted her bike around the corner and looked both ways before she rode across the street to the one lane road that would take her to her favorite painting spot. Forest Grove Cemetery was old, one that the city had stopped using a while back, but it was still visited and kept clean, filled with old statuary and wildflowers and moss. It was odd, but she always felt at peace here. Today, she had all day to paint, she’d brought her materials and a backpack of packed lunch, snacks and water,  but now… 

She looked behind her as she parked her bike near the entrance gate, sure that she’d do so at some point and see ...him. It was crazy… but then when was her life sane? She didn’t ask to have these powers. Pulling out the huge drawing pad that was mostly sketched and colored, she set herself on one of the only benches in the cemetery and set to work, following lines that were already there and some that she just knew should be. 

“Funny spot for a sunflower, a cemetery.” The voice wrapped around her, honey toned and ...well it might have been soothing, or alluring even, except it scared the holy bejeezus out of her. Whipping around, she clutched her book to her chest and  froze. It was him, the demon from before, leaned against the tree watching her. He looked for all intents and purposes, human.. But she could see past his glamour magic. An Incubus demon. His skin a deep blue, black horns curling back and up away from his face, a face that looked both softly sensual and so sharply beautiful that it hurt, and was dotted by silver piercings. The horns seemed more prominent where his hair was shaved on the sides, and where his human mask had blue eyes so dark they looked black, now his eyes were like the night sky, full blackness with a swirling blue galaxy that almost made you drown in them. He was… sinnfully gorgeous, built like a swimmer with narrow hips and a lean frame... And he was powerful...she could sense it. The only issues she had right at the moment was the cigarette that dangled from his hands as he pulled it from a pack in his jacket and lit up. He watched her curiously, smirk on his lips when she hadn't replied, only stared. “What’s the matter, sunflower? Cat got your tongue?” he asked.

“No..” She voiced, hesitating when he raised a brow at her. She frowned at him. “Those things smell awful by the way...” She commented, knowing that since he was a demon, he probably didn’t care much about it possibly affecting his health. Heck it probably did nothing for him besides maybe making him seem ’cool’. He blinked at her, before he smirked again and snuffed out the cigarette, chuckling. “You can see through my disguise, can’t you?” He gestured at his body, “Not many humans can, although you’re not the first…” He sighed, straightening out and stretching like a big cat. He reminded her of some large jungle cat with the way his lithe blue tail swished back and forth lazily… maybe he meant more with that analogy of his. She wondered what kind of demon he was, she could feel his power, like warm breath over her skin. It was… nice, but why could she feel it? She’d been around other demons, and fae, and while they held power, most were uninterested in her, didn’t see her even. Was he pushing it to touch her? Was there supposed to be an effect? It was odd, Andras let his power pool around her and yet… she simply stared at him, up close he could see the freckles across her face. But there was no feeling of lust, and her hazel green eyes didn’t linger over him, her pupils didn’t dilate in want... she wasn’t affected by him. That fact hit him like a ton of bricks. Not that there weren’t beings that held immunity to incubus powers, though it was a small range especially for one of his lineage and status but.. for a human to have no effect well, that was a rare thing. “You gonna answer me sunflower?”

“Yes, I can see what you are..” She spoke softly, trailing off. She was nervous, he could see it in the way her fingers played with the ridges of her book. But it was the nerves of a potential prey likely to bolt, it wasn’t anticipation he saw normally with females. She licked her lips as he stepped forward. “Look, I didn’t mean to offend you or anything by staring..You caught my eye…. Not that I mean anything like that by the way..”

“No.. staring’s fine.” He grinned, interrupting her ramblings. He was trying to read her, appear.. charming, playful...she tilted her head a bit and he continued. “I was curious to see what you were up to all alone, like I said, a cemetery is an odd place for a sunflower.” He stepped closer. Her eyes widened a little at that and she made to stand up, leaning away. Okay he probably could have worded that better.

“Why do you..” She started, then looked down at her shirt and flushed a little. “I’m not a sunflower. I’m sketching and I don’t want any trouble so...you can  be on your way Mister Demon.” She mumbled, and Andras was confused. When she didn’t say anything else, it was clear that she didn’t want anything to do with him...still that didn’t deter him. 

He stepped closer again and it brought her gaze up in a hurry… was she… scared of him? “It's not everyday I get shooed away by a pretty girl. I’m not gonna hurt you.. In fact, I’m pretty sure you’d like me if you tried.” He purred, winking and putting on a smile. “At least tell me your name?” 

This time she did stand up, shoving her padbook into her bag with a small frown in her lips. He was being.. a creep. Was this normal for an Incubus? Didn’t he know that commenting to a girl that she was all alone and secluded with some stranger with every potential to hurt her was… scary?  Again, she felt his warm power and realized that he was.. Flirting..? Trying to seduce her? Heat crept up her cheeks, not only by realizing what he was doing but also for what he kept calling her. And she really didn’t feel like giving him her name. Clearing her throat, she looked down at her stuff then back to him. “Listen.. I’m sorry mister demon but… I didn’t ask to be able to see the real you.. And I’m not interested in…”  she gestured her hands, “yeah, so you can ...just not... with the names and flirting. I just came here to sketch and I’m sure you have much more fun things to do like parties and whatnot... so..yeah...” She trailed off again, hesitating in her speech. She didn’t want to be mean, or piss him off...right now he seemed laid back, non threatening. But that could change. Grabbing her backpack she turned away in a hurry. 

Andras blinked, a frown of his own turning to a confused scowl. “Hey! Wait a minute.. Hey, sunflower..!” His voice caught her before she could get far and she paused, turning to him with another frown.  “I don’t mean to be a pest. If it’ll help, I’ll tell you my name?” He asked, whatever small awkwardness he held melting away. She had to admit, he was charming. 

“What’s your name then?” She asked, and he seemed to brighten up. 

“Andras.” He answered her, giving a mock bow that seemed to be more sensual than romantic. “And what can I call you? If not a sunflower?” he chuckled. She paused again and then smirked. 

“See ya around then.. Andras.” Not answering and then she was off, heading down the path and disappearing off into the cemetery. He was… stunned. And he didn’t even get her name! He huffed as he pulled out another cigarette and stopped, scoffing a laugh when her words in his head came back. Smells bad? He never thought to care about that, and most people didn’t comment on it. 

He thought about going after her again, but instead, he turned and stopped when something caught his eye....  On the bench where she had been sitting was a folded piece of paper, stuck as if she’d dropped it. He shoved his cigarettes back into his pocket, walking over to pick it up.... and smiled. Looks like fate had other plans for his runaway sunflower...and what the hell, he liked the chase. 

Disappearing in a cloud of blue tinted smoke, he set out to make some plans.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Her bike tires skidded to a halt in front of what used to be an old book store. A few months back they’d renovated it into some sort of building for art classes and after working overtime, she’d signed up to take one. The flyer, that she couldn’t for the life of her remember where she put it, had said that each week was a different theme or lesson and it seemed...exciting. Maybe it would inspire her to draw something other than..

Again she shook herself from whatever weird dreams she’d been having that week and parked her bike against the building. It was a little later in the evening but it seemed to be the only time she could do with her work schedule, she just hoped she wasn’t too late. As she headed inside though, she was relieved to see a smaller gathering, probably ten or fifteen people, all standing around mingling. The room was nicely lit and a warmer temperature than outside, to the right of the room was a circle of chairs and easels set up around what looked like a platform. That made her pause...in her dream last night-

“Hey! Welcome to the class, you must be Cassie?” A middle aged woman with white blonde hair came up to her, breaking her thoughts. 

“Ah! Yes ma’am.” She answered politely, feeling nervous when others turned her way. She wasn’t as dressed up today, since she’d be painting, she wore a big shirt that had star trek next generation on it and some ripped jeans, both already had paint on it. All that coupled with her beanie and reading glasses, made her look like a nerd and a boy...a look she liked but often felt out of place around others. 

“Great, thanks for joining us! My name is Sofia, we spoke on the phone? We were expecting another person but they canceled on us. Still, For today’s class, we’ll be painting a live nude model, I mentioned this right?” She asked and Cass assured her that yes she knew of what this week entailed. Though, something in her brain nagged at her, why did this particular room look so familiar?

Sofia had her fill out a form, and then called the class to order, no time for deja vu thoughts when she got to set up her paints for her easel, grabbing her pencil to sketch first. It was then, she found out, why the room looked so familiar. Sofia introduced the model with a flush on her cheeks, and a hush fell over the room as Andras walked in from behind a screen she hadn’t noticed at the back of the room. She froze in place while the others awed over him, he was just as gorgeous as before but.. what hit her most... was that this moment was her dream last night.. She had seen this, him, in her dreams, dreamt of tracing his lines with her pencils.. her fingers... He noticed her with a breathtaking smile as he introduced himself and stepped onto the platform. He was once again in his human guise, and yet she could see past it if she tried hard enough. And then he was shedding his robe, and while the idea of sex had never appealed to her, she felt... something in her stir as she took him in...he was a work of art. 

“Alright Andras, give us a comfortable, natural pose and hold it. We’ll break when you need to.” Again, Sofia’s voice cut through her thoughts and Andras posed as she explained that they were going to take everyone’s unique style in the form of real life sketches first. But Cassie’s mind was already going, and so was her hand.

She always went to a different place when drawing, and when painting, but here it was like the two of them were the only in the room. He hadn’t chosen a provocative pose, one arm bent up and the other reaching down, he looked like a greek god, or a statute of one. She sketched the lines of his face, the curve of his mouth, his hair, shaved on the sides and wild on top, black and soft, and each piercing in his ear, nose and lips. His upper body was studded, small raised patterns of skin, like scars made purposefully, they traveled across his chest and down his stomach. For some reason, drawing him, drawing him in hard lines seemed wrong, so instead she used soft curves and watched him come to life on canvas...and that made him more real than him standing no less than ten feet away. 

Before she knew it, Miss Sofia was calling for a break and Andras was stretching, moving again and completely comfortable with being in the nude. There was chatter, a few people flocking to Andras to ask him questions as he robed up and Sofia gave him a bottle of water. Cass...stayed seated. She followed the lines of her pencil, letting it complete the curves and edges that was him. Somehow she’d managed to capture some sort of emotion on his face, mischievous, wistful, lusting… distant. 

“Do sunflowers always sit by themselves?” His voice startled her and just as she whipped her head up to see him standing behind her...she caught his reaction to her drawing. His face said he was impressed, but there was also.. A softer something in his face.   He was so...tall, she mused. He seemed to shake himself though and smile down at her. “You have some wicked talent.” That got her to flush red more than any of his attempted flirting had. “Thank you.. Um, could you not call me sunflower?” She asked, dropping her gaze as he took the seat beside her. She wasn’t even wearing that shirt anymore.

“Not a chance.” He grinned, “You never told me your name. But I stilI found you.~” he sang with a small laugh. She frowned at that, found her? 

“You were looking for me?” She tilted her head, confused, “Why?” She didn’t leave the cemetery that day.. He could have followed her, but he didn’t.

Andras wondered how she could make such an innocent gesture look so ...cute, and it was surprising to him that he thought something like that. He sipped his water and sat back with a smirk. It was easy for him to stretch out, feel all of the eyes in the room on him. But hers wasn’t in want. “Because you’re a bit of a mystery. Won’t tell me your name and hang out in graveyards? And you can see me. The real me.” He watched again as her hazel eyes dropped to her hands. What was she hiding? And again while he could feel the lust off of  everyone in the room, from the instructor to the only two males, all of them lighting up on his radar, she alone was a blank spot. All of the others' works had seemed innately sexual but hers...there was something different. 

This time she rolled her eyes a little. “Cass, my name is Cass, or Cassie if you like.” she said, her eyes lifting up, looking through him more than at him. “Did you seriously sign up as the model to get to me?” She asked and when she put it so bluntly…he guessed that he was being a bit stalkerish.

“What can I say? You left an impression on me.” He smiled. It was just then that the instructor lady got his attention, asking if he was ready to continue their session. He said he was, glancing once more to Cass, and stood up. Looking at Cassie's painting and then back up to her, he gave another dazzling grin, “Paint me like one of your french girls?” He asked. 

And she laughed, head back and eyes closed, a loud sound like he’d caught her off guard. Something in Andras liked that, that he’d made her laugh, and he gave her another smile as he stepped up to the platform and shed the robe again. 

He resumed his pose, able to look right at her, though she seemed once again to just be looking through him. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Weeks followed and for some reason it bothered Andras that he hadn’t seen her since then. She’d only shown up at the one art class, and when he asked about her, the instructor woman had even said she’d left her painting to be displayed. He declined sticking around after that… after he bought the painting with enough cash to buy the studio. One reason why it had been weeks was because he had to feed, at least once or twice a week depending on the “meal” available but when he wasn’t doing so, he was.. quite literally hanging around, bored out of his skull and hoping… to see her. He went back to the cemetery several times, but no luck. Out of all the flowers there, not a single one was the sunflower he wanted to see. 

He scrubbed a hand down his face with a growl as he walked down the street, when did he become such a fucking sap? Why was he still hung up on one human woman? She obviously didn't want to be around him. And again...humans were predictable, weak...except he didn't think that she fell into that category. Still, he felt wondrously bored out of his skull and a bored demon wasn’t something anyone wanted. Maybe it was time to let this all go, move on to another city. 

“Andras?” The voice halted his steps, and he turned to see...Cass. She was standing in the doorway of a small pottery shop that was wedged in between two larger buildings, a tote bag tucked under one arm and a curious expression on her face. Well.. fate had other plans once again. “Are you stalking me again?” She asked, raising a suspicious brow in his direction and stepping off the step of the shop.  

“No.” He winced, because...had he been? Kinda. Maybe. Okay he had been. “Well not really,” He amended, “I've been hoping to find you again but no such luck. But fate has led me to my sunflower.” He smiled, charming and cheesy all at once. He watched her frown, pursing her lips a bit though her eyes rolled and he caught amusement as she moved past him to a small alleyway where her bike was parked. 

“It’s not sunflower, remember? It’s Cass. And fate is stupid.” She grumbled, pouting her lips. He wondered why the sour tone. Was that really how she felt about fate, not that he could fault her on that really,  or was it his presence that made her frown like that. He couldn’t have that.

“My apologies, Cass.” He smiled again and followed after her as she set her bag into the basket on the front of the bike. “And yeah, fate is a tricky mistress. I'll give you that. And yet just when I'd given up, you popped up in my sights. So that must count for something right?” 

She eyed him, relaxing a touch and sighing a little. “I guess so.” Though she felt otherwise on the matter for sure… still it wasn’t his fault. Not really, especially when she had other reasons he didn’t even know of, that made her stance on the cruelty of fate more concrete. She was stolen from her thoughts by the warmth touching her again, his power? Or did he just radiate that? Looking up, she could see him watching her, his curious dark eyes… it didn’t take much to see past the illusion he held of being human, and the real him was just as flawless. Why was he so interested in her? He could have.. Anyone. Was it her odd powers that lured him?

She shook her head. “So, you’ve found me...again, what now? I told you that I’m not interested in flirting.” She said, her tone was softer, unsure of what he wanted but wanting to remind him, casual sex was off the table. 

“Hey, even I know that no means no. I’m not here to seduce you,” and then his smile turned to a grin, his voice a lower purr. “Not unless you want me to try. I do like the chase.” he teased, quick to drop that tone and she was grateful. “but really, I just feel drawn to you. And though I’m not sure why yet, I’d like to find out.” He admitted, shifting again from the role of wicked incubus, that bit of awkwardness she’d glimpsed before coming back. “There’s something there, I know it..” He said and Cass found herself taking a breath to steady herself. Of course there was something more...but she couldn't tell him that. Could she? 

“You hungry?” Cass blurted before she lost courage, picking at the edges of the tote bag in her bike basket. This was stupid.. She didn’t get involved with demons...But Andras grinned. “And if I am?” he asked, shoving his hands in the pockets of his jeans, hanging low on his hips. She looked at him then, and again, no lust or want or arousal, but nerves. 

Cass shoved at her hair and pushed a headband back through it, away from her face. “I just got off work,” She pointed to the pottery shop, “We could.. grab a bite to eat? And maybe talk.” She probably sounded stupid.

“Alright, let’s go then.” Andras said and stepped in close. She barely had time to protest before he was pushing her bike down the street, her trying to keep up with his long strides.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cass dipped another fry into her milkshake, kicking her feet because she was too short in the booth to touch… which he found cute really. She was more than cute, she held a softer beauty, one that felt feminine… yet not, he couldn’t describe it. He’d been with males and females, and those that felt they were neither, both or in between.. Bodies that were warm and soft or hard and rugged...he liked them all. And she was no exception. He had seen first her outer beauty but there was something.. More. Again, it was difficult to describe the pull she held.  “I know that it’s not the most...unbelievable thing, not to people like you.” She said softly, “But I don’t exactly go around broadcasting my… abilities.” She shrugged, munching on her food, glancing around to the only semi busy burger joint. 

“I mean, that’s understandable.. and I did stalk you.” He grinned at her, completely unashamed of his actions apparently. But she smirked, a twitch of her lips that made him notice the dimples she very barely had. “And by the way sunflower, there are no people like me.” he added on, watching her roll her eyes, protesting that she was not a sunflower. “But you are human, and you have... a power to you. A pull… help me understand why that is? I know you didn’t ask me to lunch just because.” He knew that if it had been someone else, his charming smile and sensual allure could have them eating out of his hands, but Cass seemed wary. Like a nervous cat about to be caged, and he didn’t want to scare her off. It felt… awkward, trying to get someone to open up to him with actual… effort. 

Cass seemed to purse her lips in thought, her eyes dropping to what was left of her food, before launching into her life story. She told him about her powers, unstable as they were, how things, demon or otherwise, were always drawn to her and how she had visions that often caused her to black out from the force of them. It was why she rode a bike instead of driving. “My parents didn’t have powers.. in fact they hated that I did and tried to get the church involved.” She winced, very vividly remembering what cruelty they had dealt her. Then there was her sister, a few years older and just… gone one night. She’d said goodbye, a sleepy memory that she tried to hold onto but part of Cassie felt that she’d been abandoned. 

“And you’ve had visions of me?” Andras asked, listening to her as though she weren’t babbling nonsense. A waitress came by, slipping her phone number in with the check, smiling and touching him as though she couldn’t help but to do so, she completely looked Cassie over, which didn’t bother her much. She was used to it for the most part. Andras though, seemed to preen at the attention and tucked her number into his pocket with a wink. It hit her that she’d only seen him as a demon now, she didn’t see his disguise though she knew it was there otherwise the waitress would have freaked. 

“Sort of?” She questioned, mostly herself more than his question. “I’ve seen you.. before I saw you on the street, I mean. In dreams and such. I had a vision where I was just.. happy, and you were there.” A tint of warm pink touched her cheeks when she admitted that. “But for the most part I don’t know how to interpret the things I see. They aren’t always accurate or certain and time changes the outcome so.. I try to avoid it.” She spoke softly now but seemed less tense. 

Andras sat back in the booth. “Well that makes sense. You’re what us.. Other folks would call a Seer.” He’d met more than one and none were ever alike.. and that did explain the pull he had towards her, but not why she had no reaction to him. Cass nodded like she was familiar with the term. “But, have you ever considered finding someone to work with your powers? You’re young but If someone my power level is drawn to you..” He knew that he had meant her no harm but… there were always those that did out there. Cass looked away. 

“I usually outrun them.. When they find me.” She voiced and he frowned. 

“Who’s they?” He asked, though he had an inkling as to who she meant. 

“Demons, fae, vampires once. People who think that I can control this and scare me..” She admitted. She didn’t know why she felt like admitting this to him. She had thought of running from him too. But maybe it was their constant meeting, or maybe.. She did find him charming in a way. Andras paid, though Cassie protested and as he walked her down the street, Cass pushing her bike, he again brought up the idea of seeking someone to help her harness her power. 

“I tried to go to a psychic.. One of those ones that claimed to read fortunes.. But she was a farce.” Cass explained. It had been embarrassing and frustrating to have someone read a premade astrology horoscope to her, not listening once to her problems and seeming irritated for voicing them. She stopped pushing her bike and looked up at him as he stopped too. “Why are you so interested in helping me..?” 

“I can’t let other demons stalk you now, it’s my job.” Andras grinned with a wink, and of course, he was rewarded with a smile. “Look, let me pull some strings. Least I can do is help out my new friend yeah?” He stuck out his hand. At this, she brightened and reached out, shaking his hand. 

“Okay.” She agreed, liking the idea that he could be a friend.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taglist: @doodledream @jellyflux @serenitydusk @sunrisehoneybee @ijwrff @the-dying-red-rose @junepop45 @no-need-to-apply @nickthegiantboi (its not gt but I hope you don’t mind me tagging you)  @scribbles-main-blog @matronofthevoid    @bee-wrecker @spooky-scary-lesbian If I forgot anyone Im so sorry! >.< And if you want to be tagged just let me know!

[writingsoftheunderworld]

Ok I’m so happy someone taking requests. It’s take place season two where Bonnie and Damon hate each other but there daughter comes from the future to help them fight Klaus but no one knows she’s there daughter. Thank you 😊

Hey! So glad too! I’m always up for some Bamon so it’s come at just the right time. Ok, so I’ve definitely done as requested, but I’m really enjoying this and would love to maybe turn it multi-chaptered so if there’s demand I might add onto this story, it was soo much fun. 

Anyways, @barkingbullfrog here you go! Hope you enjoy. Sadly the Bamon is not too romanc-y what with the setting though I went with later season two so they are at least reluctantly working together.

Damon propped his feet up on the arm of the loveseat he found himself laying down on, an air of nonchalance mere facade to the turmoil he was feeling inside. Elena and Stefan sat opposite him, poetic really, he thought, talking about what there was to do now that uncle John decided to fuck up again. He couldn’t understand how some people could be this stupid. Why would anyone trust Isobel was beyond him, the bitch had tricked him into turning her, had tricked Elena just a few months ago, had fucked up Alaric good and proper and had been working with Katherine. He listened to Stefan try to propose they use their house as a safe-house and Elena shoot it down immediately. Figures. Was there no one around who used their brain? 

There’s Bonnie, his mind helpfully supplied as he heard Elena wrack up another complaint. He answered this one, thoughts of the little witch in his head. He didn’t like having to revisit one of his greatest failures. Because he knows allowing Emily Bennett to burn could only be catalogued as nothing other than failure. And now Bonnie wanted to absorb all that power. Hence, she was definitely the intelligent one here. More power was exactly what they needed, not drama with bio-mom from hell. 

“To the Lockwood luncheon.” he heard Elena finish her sentence, followed closely by his brother’s knight in armour agreement.

“Not me, I’ve witch stuff to attend to with Bonnie” he quipped, watching Elena’s warm gaze shifting to him again. He also paid enough attention to Katherine lurking about just then. He knew she’d been listening to the whole conversation, she wasn’t subtle about it, which only served to annoy and baffle him. Why wasn’t Mistress of Bitchdom pretending to hide anymore? Oh well, question for another day perhaps, bigger fish to fry.

“Does that mean you’re taking her to the -” he shushed Elena before she could give them away, a stray thought of Bonnie would’ve known not to say anything worming its way into his mind, and he almost scoffed at himself. Since when was the witch at the front of his thoughts? But before he could dwell on that particular annoyance, Katherine saunters her way over and he hears footsteps outside in the walkway. He’s about to answer the she-demon when the front door’s lock turns and the door swings open suddenly. He’s up on his feet and with his hand around the uninvited visitor’s neck before Stefan even has the chance to get up and plant himself in front of Elena. Katherine of course does nothing, simply turns to stare at him and the young woman he’s holding against the wall, a mild shock flitting over her features almost too quick to see. He doesn’t get more than a few seconds before he finds himself doubled over in sudden pain, clutching his head as stars burst behind his eyelids. He almost thinks he’s misstepped and Bonnie herself was standing there, the wave of magic bringing him to his knees and the smell of blood so very similar to hers. Bennett blood for sure.

“Ack!” He cries out and waits for the ringing in his ears to subside, then he casts a customary glance around at his brother and his ex, surprised to see Katherine herself on her knees, still in apparently a lot of pain. Whoever the Bennett witch that just stepped inside their house like she owned it was, she didn’t stop until Katherine was unconscious on the ground.

“Sorry for the aggression, but I don’t respond to threats well and I really don’t like her.” a soft, but confident voice has Damon turning back to inspect the newcomer. She’s petite, in all senses of the word with her barely up to his shoulders height and lithe physique, but her own shoulders are squared and there’s an air of knowing all around her. He almost sees the Bennett witch they’re all too familiar with in her stead again. It’s disconcerting to say the least, especially with the very bright, and very blue, eyes staring at him with a small smirk. She’s cocky too, he realizes, and she’s certainly powerful enough to back it up if Katherine’s unconscious form on the ground like a sack of potatoes is anything to go by.

“And who exactly are you?” he readies himself for another aneurysm as he speaks, but to his surprise, her whole demeanor shifts suddenly upon looking back at him, if he didn’t know better he’d say she’s just… seen her favourite person. But it snaps back in place so quick he blinks to make sure he didn’t imagine it all.

“I’m Sheila-Rose Bennett.” She begins and he nods slowly, he’d already figured she’d be a Bennett, but how was it possible he didn’t know of her he couldn’t explain, it was strange. He might’ve not known how Lucy looked like when she showed up at the Masquerade a few weeks back, but he had remembered her father and her being born. He happened to have been near the hospital at the time, like he tried to be whenever a new Bennett was born. Hell, he still remembered Rudy, Bonnie’s dad, pacing in the small hospital hallway with Sheila there telling him to sit down and not wear the floor out when Abby was giving birth. He made good on his promises he thought, unlike Emily. “I’m here to help you with Klaus.” she continued.

He straightened out, pushing to his feet as soon as the words were out of her mouth. “And what exactly do you know of Klaus?” And how don’t I know you? His mind screamed at him. 

“I’ve had some … experience dealing with him” there was a smile on her lips, wry, as though laughing at an inside joke that only she was in on. The witch was odd.

“Ok, Sheila-Rose-” he began, but was cut off just as fast.

“It’s just Rose, only mom calls me Sheila-Rose, and that’s usually when I’m in trouble.” another one of those wry smiles. It was slowly making him lose his mind. There was something so very familiar to her that was frustrating him beyond reason.

“Sure, whatever. What can you tell us about Klaus?” He noted that Elena was shifting her weight from on foot to the other, impatient, when he remembered she needed to go. “Brother, why don’t you and Elena get to that luncheon, I’ve got Baby Blues here covered. Plus our very own Wicked Witch of the East is bound to show up in, oh, five minutes or so? I’ve got this.” Stefan and he shared a quick look and then baby brother was walking past him and the new Bennett, briefly breaking their staring contest, to pick up his coat and then he and Elena were out the door and driving away. Damon turned and poured himself some bourbon, taking a sip and letting it sooth the nagging pounding that always remained behind after that particular witch’s spell. The witch came fully inside the house now, bypassing Katherine’s body and laying herself in the same loveseat he’d previously occupied, swinging her legs up and over the arm of it, and lacing her fingers around her knees to keep herself upright, looking at him expectedly.

“Should I wait for … whoever you said was joining? Or should I just spill the beans right now?” she certainly had attitude, he thought, matching his tone to a T and he wasn’t sure whether he was impressed or annoyed by it.

“How do I not know you?” he couldn’t let that question go, and he also didn’t want Bonnie to know just how much he cared about her bloodline. She might actually burn him again if she did, he had a feeling. 

“You don’t know every one of us, we scattered too much to keep track, so let’s not poke through generations. I’m here for something else, not the past.” she smiled again, that same damn smile that was slowly making his skin itch. There was something there, she knew something she was hiding, something that was about him or regarded him at least. It was driving him insane, and still she wasn’t saying anything.

“Fine, keep your secrets. How old are you anyways, Witch-y?”

“I just turned 19. Why does it matter?” defensive. Fun! He can poke at that. 

“Kinda on the young side to be dealing with Big Bad Klaus, aren’t you?” he began and saw her wince. Double fun, he could really dig here. “How come mommy and daddy let you come here? Or do they not know?” he saw her shift in her seat and knew he’d hit the nail on the head. “Oh, so they don’t know then?”

“Not any of your business old man. I’m here and I’ve got info you guys will want, trust me on that.” 

“Old man? One, don’t nickname, two, so you’ve said but I’m not convinced. See, if you’re 19 then how come you know anything about Klaus?” 

“I know about him from my parents, they’ve fought him before. But haven’t been able to stop him. But they didn’t have the knowledge they do now, I have that and then some and I have you trying to fight him. I can help, that I promise.” She certainly was convincing, but Damon hadn’t survived so long and gone through the shit he had to just believe any nutso that strolled into his house. Just as he was about to answer her, Bonnie burst through the front door, Jeremy a few steps behind her, a flurry of righteous annoyance around her. He barely listened to her begin to berate him being late when he saw her gaze turning to their guest. 

Speaking of, the littlest witch suddenly swung her feet back to the floor, sitting up properly and a grin growing on her lips as she stood up, hand outstretched and introduced herself as though to her celebrity crush. God, why was everyone coo-coo in this town?

“Sheila-Rose Bennett! Very nice to meet you, know a lot about you, Bonnie.” She rushed through suddenly. To say that Bonnie was overwhelmed was an understatement. So he did the nice thing for once and patted the place next to him on the couch for Bonnie to take a seat. She did so in shock and even took a sip of his bourbon when he extended it to her, only to chock and sputter once the taste hit her. Small mercies seemed to exist after all, he figured when she didn’t do so much as glare at him, though with how she kept staring at the other Bennett he figured it had less to do with him and more to do with her.

“Now now, Rosie-Posie, let’s not overload Bon-bon here.” He was smirking as he spoke, looking from Bonnie to the newcomer when confusion hit him again at the genuine shock and delight on her face seemingly at his words. He was dying to know what could he have possibly said to warrant that look, but before he could, the woman began speaking in earnest. She hadn’t been lying, he realised quickly. She definitely had information they needed and power they could use, if Katherine’s still unconscious form on the ground was anything to go by.

Quick note, my head-canons about this are that:

- Sheila-Rose went behind her parents backs cuz she just wanted to help since she’s heard all about how Klaus hurt them, though she and Hope happen to get along pretty well and even Klaus and Bonnie and Damon are alright now. 

- Her dad calls her Rosie Posie. 

- While I see her as a daddy’s girl, she adores her mom with everything in her, like aspired to be her 

- The wry smile is her thinking about the future and amusing herself with the references. like the “dealt with klaus” thing or the “not here for the past” being very ironic to say the least.

[blissfulalchemist]

From the Uncommon OC Questions: 2, 20, and 35 for Cat? And A and B for you (regarding Cat and/or the character you're thinking about most right now)

Ahh! Thank you so much for asking! I did answer the second question in Cat’s actual voice so I hope that she can make sense to you haha 

2. How easy is it for your character to laugh?

Cat can laugh pretty freely, most commonly she’ll go for quieter laughs, but is more prone to boisterous laughter when drunk or really happy. When she’s down, don’t expect much more than maybe a half smile from her, there’s no energy for laughter or smiling.

20. If they were asked to explain the difference between romantic and platonic or familial love, how would they do so?

“Okay so there are different theories as to the different love types, one of which is the love triangle where you have intimacy, passion, and commitment on each corner and you can combine them to get different types of love. Which works well for a lot of situations. For me though, and to try and make this as simple as possible for both you and me, I view it as so: 

Romantic love has a more physical aspect to intimacy along with emotional side of things. There’s a passion there too that relates to physical passion but honestly beyond sex you can have passion in the sense of how much you “hype up” your partner so to speak, like you declare your love for them in public. Romantic Love for me personally is something that develops the best, and ages like fine wine, the longer you are with someone and when reciprocated. Though yes there are exceptions but again there are many different types of love. 

Platonic love is something that I feel should be celebrated more and said more often. This kind of love is most associated with friends and friendship involves more emotional intimacy to create closeness. Some of the first people we are vulnerable with is our friends. And sometimes you end up finding that person that just matches you and it can feel so close to romantic love but its not. Very hard to describe but its much similar to the feeling of a romantic soulmate.

Familial love is one that seems more of a social construct and I think should be considered platonic. Just because you are related to someone doesn’t mean there is an innate love that’s there forever. Familial love is something that is powerful in the fact that it sets up how you view relationships and love in the future and what you can come to accept as love from other people outside of family. 

I hope that all makes sense.”

35. How do they treat the things their friends come to them excited about? Are they supportive?

Oh she’s is all about joining them in their excitement! She wants to be as supportive as possible! She will try and read a situation and gauge how to go about things if the thing her friend is excited about isn’t good for them. Part of being a supportive friend means that sometimes you have to play the bad guy and tell them when they need to take a step back. 

I will answer this for Cat and my Bloodlines ocs :)

A) Why are you excited about this character?

Cat: I am always excited for her because she was the start of a writing revival for me and her story has grown and changed since her first iterations that it shocks me so much at times. Cat’s story is also something that I love so much and I so wish that I had the energy and discipline to do a long fic like I had intended to do at the beginning, as I finally get to explore the idea of “All it takes is one bad day” that kind of always stuck with me since I read The Killing Joke for a school project years ago. Like I should write more Mary (Dark Cat) as it is the most interesting aspect of her story but it is also the hardest at times because of the change in her character and balancing the core essence of Cat.

Bloodlines: Alright these babies came about by way of needing comfort so I went back and re-read the series and was bombarded with all the ideas and theories that I have in relation to the books and universe. I always had an inclination to write ocs to explore the world more even if they were tangently involved with the main characters of the source material. 

Tia was the first of this bunch and there was a passing mention of a dhampir that lived among humans and nothing more, but it got me to thinking about what that looks like when you’re unaware of a whole world and heritage you’re apart of technically. Granted I don’t know much details on whether that person knew or not but that’s what my exploration is for until she says otherwise. 

Conner was originally a way for me to look into the Alchemists and nothing more, but then there’s the aspect of witches and well there’s no way that it can only women practicing magic so I added him along with working with one of the vampire mafias essentially. 

Stasia! Oh my girl Stasia was never meant to be more than a one dimensional villain that I needed as a big bad against Conner and paired well with Tia’s backstory also, however she demanded that I look at her more closely and her whole aspect of living as an immortal came out. So I played with the idea other ex-strigoi living in the world that, like a villain in the books, wanted to go back to being that way. The personality changes and looking at how can a person have survived for so long and just how do you adapt to being human again, just god there’s so much there and so I get excited about that, she is just also a challenge to write as she is an unapologetic person and unafraid to do what needs to be done, compared to my other ocs that are more the good guys.

B) What inspired you to create them?

Cat: She was a sleeper agent in the sense that I played the game when it first came out, had a few nightmares about being trapped in bunkers and Joseph’s voice whispering, and then never thought much of it again other than how much I identified with Faith and how she must have been feeling before joining Eden’s Gate. Fast forward to 2020 and there was a replay (I think it was Jordan that replayed it) and the dream came back and I just wanted to write it down. Since I worked 1:1 with a woman that went to bed at 6pm I had a few hours and needed to fill time, so I just wrote. I soon had ~160 pages of Salvation’s Two Paths and there she was! It made me happy and I was excited and wanted to share her with people and since then she has just grown and developed into such a character and created this whole little world that I just love to play with.

Bloodlines: I always had a love for the series and there were times I was tempted but thought my writing days were behind me. Admittedly there was a time that I thought I was ready to just kind of quit writing once again, but I had the creative bug still and I needed something new since I assumed (correctly) that I just burnt myself out with Far Cry. So out of comfort and mental sanity in a still very unstable time I made myself happy and created the oc that I had wanted since I was in high school/college which then lead to two more that I absolutely love and treasure so much.

[cookiedoughmeagain]

Haven DVD Commentaries: 5.14 - New World Order

Commentary with Brian Millikin and Nick Parker, writers for the episode

BM: We knew going in to this 26 episode season that it was going to be basically two 13 episode seasons. But it was really useful for us to know that from the get go, that it wasn’t going to air in one giant 26 episode season. So we broke it that way; we knew in the season arc road map some of the bigger things that we were moving towards, and we able to spread it out over 26 episodes.

NP: Yeah so season 5A was all about Mara and Duke getting worse and worse and what she was doing to him. And then season 5B is about coming up with some sort of resolution because stuff now is worse than it’s ever been before. BM: Yeah, it was always going to be the Mara season for 5A; she was the big bad and we were going to be dealing with her, and we knew that Mara would die at the end of 5.13 - that Charlotte would wind up choosing Audrey over Mara. And then we knew that the next 13 episodes were going to deal largely with the aftermath of the Mara of it all. Because we knew that Charlotte’s choice would have some ramifications for her relationship with Audrey but we also knew that Mara would have this “evil plan” that would still come to fruition even though Mara herself is gone. And we knew that was going to be turning Duke into what we called a Trouble Bomb. NP: Yeah, she basically weaponised Duke. And weaponised the Troubles in some ways. BM: Yeah, we had become really attached to the idea that the Crockers had been absorbing those Troubles all those years, not just eradicating them. So it became really a convienient story for us that she could almost turn Duke into a Trouble giving machine. NP: One of the things I always liked is that the Troubles had been absorbed and lived in the bloodline rather than being eradicated. So it’s not just Duke and the Troubles that he’s killed, it’s all of the Crockers from the past, ever, which really gives a sense of scope and how long this has been going on for. BM: Yeah it’s the right kind of reveal for me. We detest a retcon; looking back and changing something that was set up earlier. What I prefer is a deepening of the understanding of stuff. So it wasn’t that the Crockers were getting rid of Troubles, they were actually absorbing them, but that doesn’t really erase anything that we had done before. There’s a reveal coming up in this episode about what the Barn was going to do and it’s a similar thing; you just learn a little bit more and look at it a bit differently, but it’s not undoing anything that we had set up before. NP: And I think also, with the Troubles being more visible and out there than ever (which is what this episode is also about) what I liked is that we could live in the reality of that and actually have people talk about it and deal with that in a more public way. Vince and Dave have always been the lore keepers and always hiding secrets. BM: Sure, but look - in this very scene [Vince and Dave talking to Nathan and Dwight in the station] they’re actually *telling people what they know*, which wouldn’t have happened a couple of seasons ago. NP: And I think it speaks to the fact that things are worse in Haven than they’ve ever been before. BM: Sure. And that had always been the plan for 5B. We didn’t know if this was going to be the last season of the show or not (and it may or may not be, even at the point we’re recording this commentary), but we knew that this would be a fitting end point. And so we had always intended to get to this point where Haven was at its darkest hour, both in terms of what’s going on with anyone in Haven could be Troubled, and also what’s happening with the shroud, of Haven being cut off from the rest of the world. It’s kind of set Haven into - I don’t want to say post-apocalyptic (we even joked about it being the Walking Dead in Haven) - but it’s just got, serious. Just more dangerous than it has been before, and pushed things to the breaking point. NP: I think this episode definitely sets that up and then the following two really live in that. And then they start to figure things out. BM: It’s funny, Nick and I at one point were going to be writing episodes 15 and 16 so were really heavily into living into Haven with the shroud. So then when we - for a variety of production reasons - got shifted to the episode 14 slot I think it helped us with this episode to have been working on 15 and 16. Because we ended up understanding a bit more than anyone else did at that point exactly how screwed Haven was going to be. Everyone else was still dealing with episodes 9 to 13, but we had been thinking about 15 and 16. So this episode, 14, was always going to be about watching it get to that point, so that was good preparation for us. This whole episode is kind of a downward slope of things getting worse and worse, and us trying to fix something the solution actually ends up making things more complicated.. NP: I think what’s also interesting about this episode is that it’s the season premier for 5A but because we broke it as part of this 26 episode run, it kind of straddles an interesting line where it’s almost acting as a season finale for 5A as well as the premiere for 5B, it’s a bit of a middle ground - it’s an episode that has to accomplish a lot. But it let us have some fun. Plus, Shawn Pillar, is a great director and loves to do some cool visual stuff so we actually got to go a lot bigger with our visual effects and ideas. BM: Our producers may have felt those ideas were a little too big at times. But we had always talked about it being a little bit like a disaster movie - disaster in Haven. Everything’s going bad and it’s all hands on deck, so even in this scene here [Duke waking up in the wheelchair in the hospital] there’s people running around in the background and sirens going off, explosions and stuff. But that was something we hadn’t done before in this way. There was a bit of it with the meteors at the end of season three, but we didn’t see the full effects of that because of the six month jump between season three and four, whereas now we’re living in it. NP: And that was one of the fun things about writing the season three comic book; I got to live in that moment and talk about the crazy things that were happening then. And this time we actually get to show the crazy things on screen which was a lot of fun. BM: And in addition to what Duke being a Trouble Bomb did for us in terms of now anyone in Haven could be Troubled, we also really liked what it did for Duke. I mean, obviously we don’t like it because he’s now dealing with pretty much the worst guilt ever. But something else that we had known was that in 5A Duke and Mara were going to be doing this kind of dance with each other and in the end she was going to beat him; he was going to kind of get played by here. And the guilt from that and everything else that’s been building up for all of these seasons was going to finally drive Duke to do what he had talked about doing in other episodes (like Crush) and leave town. NP: Oh a brief aside here, I like in this scene with all the people frozen where a Trouble’s been activated but it refers back to a previous Shawn Pillar show, The Dead Zone. Which you also worked on. BM: That’s right. I was just an assistant back then but this was one of their go-to moves, when Johnny Smith would have one of his visions, everyone would be frozen. And it ends up looking really cool, because it’s just kind of creepy. And it’s also one of the cheapest things to do, quite frankly, because everyone’s just standing still. NP: But it looks great. NP: Yeah. There were a couple takes we couldn’t use because someone was blinking, but it totally works. So we threw that in there for Shawn and also because we knew, as you’ll see later in the season, that it would be a Trouble that we would call upon again. And in very useful ways. NP: Yeah this episode sets up a lot of stuff that we’ll play off later in the season. BM: And that was sort of a benefit of us having a 26 episode plan. When we started working on 5.01, we knew what was going to happen in 5.26. And it didn’t really change that much; you always have to make adjustments, but we’re dealing with more and more Croatoan stuff here and we set that up from the get go.

*impressed noises of surprise from both of them as we see the car drive up to the frozen people at the fog wall, get turned around by it and smash into some of the people, shattering them * NP: Ooh, that was pretty good BM: That looked great. NP: Shawn Pillar directing the acting sequences; some quick cuts. I think that guy was probably driving about 25 miles an hour.

BM: I cannot tell you how much we talked about whether cell phones would still work or not with the shroud up. NP: Oh my god. BM: We were dealing with cell phone experts. Because it’s like; If there’s a shroud around the town and they can’t communicate with the satellite then it’s over. But other people were like; Well there’s still a couple cell towers in the town. Ultimately we just kind of wound up going with it. NP: Yeah. I think the rule we settled on was that cell phones inside the shroud would work with each other, but not be able to reach anyone outside. BM: Right. And you and I were in the camp for having no cell phones, but it’s just sort of impractical for a TV show these days.

[As Dwight gathers all of HPD together to tell them the Troubles are real] BM: Now, what’s happening here was something that we were super-excited about doing. NP: So fun. BM: So, so happy that we finally got to do it. And it’s something we’ve been talking about doing since the first day of the series. Which is finally letting the other cops in on it. Rebecca Rafferty maybe knew, and maybe Laverne seemed like they kind of knew. But Stan we’ve always been playing him as pretty oblivious. Which leads to one of my favourite Stan moments in all of the seasons. And this was fun, it’s good to be able to have them break it down and be honest, and just be like; We’ve got to rally, we’ve got to come together on this. BM: This was always a kind of ‘tale of two speeches’ episode. We knew that there would be this speech, and then there would be Dwight’s other speech later. I thought he did a great job with this one. Because he had to dance around the fact that some people maybe already know about the Troubles, other people are going to be surprised. NP: Both of these speeches were really fun to write. And both of them didn’t really change. BM: But what’s crazy is that it took us this long to get to this point. Despite everything that’s happened - meteors falling from the sky… aliens - but it took until now for them to officially let all the other cops in on it. NP: We’ve got to have all hands on deck for this. BM: Most of the cops in this scene are background actors that we’ve used for years. And I thought they really brought it. They often don’t get enough spotlight treatment on our show. Even though we’re a bit of cop show, we pretty much only deal with our main characters. But from Glen, who plays Stan, they all do a great job.

NP: What I really like about the way Shawn lit and directed these post-disaster episodes is that everything’s a little bit dim, everything’s a little bit darker; you really get the sense that they are in a rough, rought spot.

BM: So, going back to what we were talking about with the Duke of it all, we knew going in to this episode that by the end of it, Duke would be leaving. So we wanted to start him in a place here with Nathan where they’re on pretty good terms. We wanted to get the bro hugs in and wanted for things to at first seem like just another episode where maybe they’re going to be able to take care of everything. And then by the end of the episode it all sort of falls apart. The speech to the cops winds up not really working and Duke is about to abandon Haven at the end of the episode. We knew that we wanted to shake it up in 5B, so we knew that we wanted Duke to get out of there. We also knew there was a story to tell with him learning  about himself and figuring himself out, outside of town, and then having to fight his way back in. And we knew that Duke was the only one who could pass in and out of the shroud, so it all worked.

*dramatic pause in the commentary to listen to the end of Dwight’s speech to the cops, and Stan’s confused response* BM: This was our show runner Matt McGuinness’s favourite line in the episode, coming up from Stan [Stan: What?!?!] *laughing* BM: Oh Glen. Glen nails it. Great timing. NP: Matt came in the day after we sent that script, he’d been on the bike in the gym reading it and came in telling us how he burst out laughing, startling everyone around him. And I figured that was a good endorsement from our showrunner.

[Gloria getting her bottle of tequila for Dave to trigger his visions] BM: How much of an alcoholic is Gloria? Would we describe her as a problematic alcoholic? Is she just a social drinker? NP: I mean, she’s functional, I guess. But she stores tequila in a body locker, at her job. That’s a problem.

BM: So this was a complicated dance we had to do with Alex Sena being the son of Joe Sena. I hope that was clear enough for the audience. It was a bit of a tough dance. But we also knew that by the end of this episode that Charlotte was going to have a falling out with Audrey. Even though she chose Audrey at the end of the last episode, and that was a big deal, they’re going to not see eye to eye. And that’s going to be their story for the next few episodes. So we wanted to start them here in a little bit of a good place and then obviously the shit hits the fan when the truth about the Barn comes out.

[Nathan with Duke, briefing everyone about ‘exploding girl’] BM: I really like this as well, this is something we haven’t really seen before - he’s got back up at a Troubled scene. NP: What I really like about this is that now it’s not one little team investigating the Troubles, it’s like, the entire town of Haven vs the Troubles. It takes on more of a war time feel to it.

BM: Now this guy who’s playing Alex Sena NP: Victor Zinck BM: Yes, we loved him in the audition but for whatever reason the role wound up going to someone else. And then the day before we started shooting we heard that the guy who had been given the role had broken his leg, and couldn’t get on the plane NP: I think it was his foot, or? BM: But so we wound up going back to Victor here, and I am happy that we did. No offence to the other guy. But I think he’s fantastic. NP: I think Victor in his audition tape had a really big mop of hair. BM: Yeah, he had to get a hair cut.

[As Alex Sena freezes all the cops and only Duke is left to talk to him] NP: So this is where we establish that Duke is immune to all the Troubles that came out of him. BM: Well we really needed just a little Trouble in this episode to help re-establish that Duke isn’t affected by the Troubles that came out of him. It’s kind of a set up for why and how he’s able to leave through the shroud. But we realised that wasn’t that clear, so it was an opportunity at the same time to tell a story about, what would it be like now if new people were Troulbed without knowing how to deal with it. And we actually haven’t done a Troubled cop before. And at the same time we’re telling a story about the cops trying to handle this crisis but just being a little bit unable do, out of lack of experience. NP: It’s just too big. There’re currently living in a terrarium, trapped with all of these Troubles. It’s intense. BM: They are standing right now [Duke trying to talk Alex down], right behind our production office. NP: Yes, and this was almost one of the last days in this production office before we made the move BM: Yes, just after this we start our move to Halifax. We have been shooting for five years in Chester, Nova Scotia, and now we’re moving about an hour up the coast. Our stages were on a hockey rink that come September we’ve got to give it back to them. But hockey is, let’s be honest, more important than the show. NP: Yep. BM: So we were shooting outside of Chester for the first time. Starting with episode 18 I think.

[Gloria: Oh I need a beer; tequila makes me thirsty] *both laugh* BM: Oh, Jayne Eastwood is an MVP. NP: You can give her any line and she’ll make it funny. She’s great. BM: We were lucky to get her for this episode. She’s a recurring character, not a regular, so it’s a little bit tough because we don’t have what they call a ‘hold’ on her. So every time we want her in an episode we have to figure out whether or not she’s doing something else. So we just got lucky with this episode. NP: It was also fun to write this little bit with Dave getting drunk because John Dunsworth, who plays him, on his other show Trailer Park Boys is a constant drunk on that show; he’s always stumbling around in his boxer shorts drunk as can be. So we’ve had a couple opportunities we’ve jumped at to have him act drunk. Here and in Crush when he had the bends. It’s always fun to see him act that. BM: And this wound up being a really important moment where we needed to see what’s going on with Dave; his tie to Croatoan. Just that name is the trigger for another one of these visions. And again this is something we’ve been setting up since the beginning of the season, with the wound in his leg and everything. We knew that we wanted there to be these visions and for them to realise that they’re not flashbacks at all, they’re real time present day memories now. Memories of somebody else.

[Back with Alex Sena, Duke and all the frozen cops] NP: I really liked this moment here which is that because everyone else is frozen, Duke is the one that has to do the curse whispering. Which is something that Audrey, and sometimes Nathan, has always done. BM: We very rarely see it be Duke. And we really wanted that to be in this episode, and it all kind of came together for us here when - it was almost like a curse anti-whispering as Alex here is whispering himself. But we knew that he could do it if it came from a place where he gets angry at Duke and blames Duke. NP: Which is something that evolved as the writing of this script went on. BM: Yeah there were tons of different versions of this scene. But once we landed on this one where Alex is curse-whispering himself and at the same time pushing Duke towards leaving town, then it really felt right. But again, it was another example of someone trying to fix something [Duke trying to Trouble whisper Alex] and it goes awry. NP: Which is what the show lives in a lot, which I like. [Alex Sena to Duke: You should get out of here. Before you get more people killed.] BM: And there’s no retort there - it’s a big deal when Duke doesn’t have a come back. NP: I think this might have been one of the last sunny days of filming up in Nova Scotia. BM: But it’s raining on Duke. NP: I think Eric Balfour just does a really good job. I mean we’ve talked about it before but he’s a very good actor with his face. He expresses a lot of emotion with just small looks. You can see how pained he is in that moment. BM: Absolutely. We talk a lot when we’re casting actors or watching dailies about their eyes. And it’s hard to put a finger on it but there’s just something that you can see on someone’s face that there’s something going on there; something more, something deeper. You can almost see what they’re thinking. And there are some actors, who shall remain nameless, who you just can’t. It’s weird. And it’s not the be all and end all but - Eric definitely has it. Whatever it is. NP: Yep, when you can just point a camera at him and have other people’s lines on his face and his expressions and you have that as an option, it’s great. BM: Absolutely. And there were plenty of times when we were going through scripts with Eric where we ended up cutting lines because he can do it with a look.

NP: There’s an important mythological conversation coming up here [between Charlotte and Audrey] BM: Oh yes, a huge mythology bomb, I think we refered to it as. But we needed to establish the rings, which we had seen in 5A but which are going to be much more important this season, and we needed to learn a bit about the Barn. And I think as soon as we decided that this was where that truth bomb about the Barn was going to come in, that from a certain point of view was going to cure the Troubles, but in reality was going to cure them by eradicating Troubled people. NP: Which was an important distinction. BM: So as soon as we determined that this was where that was going to come in, I think it really changed everything for us. We realised that Audrey and Charlotte’s relationship is going to be really important this season. She’s the closest thing to a mom that Audrey has, which is a big deal, but she’s about to discover that her and her mom don’t see eye to eye. And it fell in line with something that we always talked about with the Barn which was that it was this punishment device that was built for Mara to try and help teach Mara a lesson - NP: It was a rehabilitation programme essentially BM: Yeah, but we always talked about the idea that, and really liked the idea that the people who built it (Charlotte, really) they kind of didn’t get it. They were trying to teach Mara a lesson but it obviously didn’t work. Because they didn’t get to the heart of it. And by the same sort of way, Charlotte was trying to do a good thing (by cleaning up the mess that Mara made) by in a kind of a cruel way NP: This scored earth approach BM: So Charlotte, her heart’s in the right place but her head, is not. NP: Yes, and what this episode, and really this season is about is getting her head there too. BM: And she did a great job with this because Laura had to carry all of this exposition. And she nailed it. NP: Laura really is great. In this and other episodes, just as a function of her character knowing what she does and being from this other place, she had to download a lot of information and do it in compelling ways. And hopefully the writing does that, but regardless of how well the writing does it, she nails it with the acting. BM: Absolutely. It’s funny, there was a lot of talk before we cast Laura because we knew that she was going to be revealed to be Audrey’s mother, or Mara’s mother. But she’s only I think the same age as Emily. But we were totally confident in casting her because she carries herself in such a way in some of her roles. And we never heard any word from Emily or her or anyone struggling with it. They just kind of fell into it.

[Audrey and Nathan hug outside Lisa Hawkin’s place] BM: We talked a lot about this hug. It seemed kind of incidental on the page, but it was a big deal. They’d been split apart for a bunch of scenes. And this was the first season premiere we’ve ever done where they started it together and the two of them and their relationship is not the problem. There’s no Mara thing, she’s not off in weird Barn space, she hasn’t been kidnapped like at the start of season three, a doppelganger her didn’t show up like at the end of season one. So, for once, they’re not the problem and they have each other. And that was a big deal for us, going into season 5B. NP: Absolutely. I think it’s what differentiates this premiere and this season from others is that really 5B is about the town. The town as a war zone, the town of Haven. Which is nice to be able to come towards what is a wrapping up point and have the show really be about the town as a whole. BM: It’s funny, maybe it’s because of the ‘Save the cheerleader, save the world’ of it all - say what you will about Heroes, but we had sort of shortened it down in our pitch to the network and everyone that 5A was going to be ‘Save Audrey’ and 5B was ‘Save Haven’. And so we always knew that 5B would be, the mission would be to build a new Barn. And we have to finally cure the Troubles. So that’s where this episode came from, and we knew we were going to get to that at the very end, and we knew that in order to get there, because we hadn’t done it in seasons past, it hadn’t been the mission to cure the Troubles before. Both because they never had a way to (but now we’ve got Charlotte) but also because things had been bad before but had always been manageable. The Troubles would come and go but Haven was safe most of the time. But now it is not safe. Now it’s worse than ever, so it’s all hands on deck let’s try and cure this.

[Coming up to the earthquake-in-the-police-station scene] NP: This was a fun thing to write for Adam Copeland. And he nailed it. Because of his abilities as an actor, and maybe also because of his training as a wrestler. But he is a total bad ass in these. Super hard, super determined. And he plays it so well. BM: This scene was great. The idea of an earthquake in the police station was something that I think you and I had pitched to the powers that be really early on, and they were like; We could never produce that. And I was like; We’ll shake the camera, it’ll be like Star Trek. But everyone got on board now because conceptually we liked the idea of the whole mess in town hitting the police station. NP: We also needed to break the police station for a variety of reasons. We were going to move production up to Halifax. BM: That’s right, we were not going to have the set. It was going to be taken down and rebuilt an hour north in Halifax. That’s right. Jennifer Stewart, our fantastic production designer, called us  and thanked us. We were like; We need to break a bit of the set, it needs to be dusty and messy. And she was like; that’s great because we need to pull it apart anyway. So we were making it so that there was no way that we could go back into the police station for a few episodes until it’s fixed. NP: Yeah, a narrative explanation for a real world issue. BM: But it worked in this episode, so it was like; two birds, one stone. That’s what we do. NP: And do you remember the dailies of these scenes when we go them in? They were awesome because they shook the camera and had dust falling down and everything, but whatever was causing the shaking and the dust was really loud that the actors had to scream so loud to get over that noise that it worked great.

BM: So our idea with this sequence was that we wanted Dwight to see the way that the cops weren’t responding to the Troubles very well, they’ve almost shot Dwight, the station’s falling apart and now he gets the call from Nathan to say that there’s no way to take the shroud down. Just when he’s been kicked he gets a call telling him there’s no hope. So we’ve pushed Dwight to his second speech. With the first speech they had broken the dam a little bit, now he’s about to flood the truth out. So this is something else we’d always talked about in what may or may not be the last season of the show, one of the tenets we’d always held on to was that there’s some people in town who know about the Troubles. There are a lot of people who know about the Troubles but not everybody; we’re about, at most, like 25% of the town know. But that distinction is about to be erased. We wanted this episode to let everyone in on it. NP: And I think we always loved the idea of using the old air raid sirens. BM: Yeah, we had to sell some people on it. We figured there’d be these old speakers and Dwight would grab this old timey mic, and it felt Haven-y NP: Yeah it did BM: And we wanted to cut around to see the crowds listening, for this disaster movie feel. And it’s funny we were pretty worried about the speech and how it would come across NP: Both of the speeches BM: But they both worked out really well. I think it was jus tbecause it’s something we haven’t really done before. But it was great. NP: And it was stuff we’ve had in mind for a while. Working on the show for as long as we have, just kind of living in it. You kind of know what you would say to people to explain what it was really like. And so really it was just like putting those ideas down on paper BM: Yeah, when I was working on the speech I would just harken back to how I would explain the show to people. You know; there’s this town, with people who can do things, we call them Troubled. And we’re recording this commentary many months before this episode airs but we imagined when we saw the dailies [for Dwight giving his speech to the town and the residents outside listening] and how great it all looks - you could almost do a commercial with just this. Some shots of Dwight, some shots of the town and the audio and it would be; Wow - that show looks great! NP: This speech as a trailer on Netflix or whatever would nicely explain what the show is. BM: Yeah. Shawn, and everyone, did a great job wih this whole sequence here. And in many way this was the climax of the episode. NP: And a literal mic drop BM: But it felt right for a season premier to pull the rug out on everything that we knew about Haven up to this point. NP: And puts Dwight at total odds with Audrey and Nathan and their approach to things. This was the idea. BM: Yeah. But as big a moment as that was, we always knew, in the pitch, the outline, the script, that there would be another scene after that before the last commercial break, which is this here [Nathan and Audrey meeting Duke at the fog wall]. Even though Dwight’s speech was a big deal, we then come over here and Audrey and Nathan are about to receive one more gut punch. NP: Yeah because important as the town is, this show is mostly about this trio here. BM: Yeah. And for all the problems they’ve had, the three of them have been able to over come pretty much anything. I’m talking about time and space. NP: Yes. Time, space, death, age. BM: But the one thing they can’t really over come is if they’re broken. And Duke’s going to leave. I thought we’d get some push back at the idea that Duke would choose to leave, rather than getting pushed out or thrown out. I was always worried that people would say that it would make Duke too unlikeable. I think it’s because of Eric, because he’s so good that he’s able to sell it. And you feel sorry for him, and understand what he’s been through over the course of five seasons. Audrey’s like; Think of everything you’ve done. And Duke’s like; That’s the problem, I am thinking about it. NP: And it’s bad. BM: He was a happy go lucky Han Solo type, and look what’s happened to him. NP: And the loss of Jennifer. I think that is kind of a critical thing. Jennifer’s been gone for a while, but Duke has never gotten over it. BM: But what I liked about it was we were able to have him refer to history over five seasons of the show. And when you can have characters make decisions based on that kind of history, as opposed to things that happen in just one episode, I think that we’ve really succeeded. So I hope that rewards long time fans of the show, that he would actually turn and walk out through the shroud that they feel we’ve been building to this for a while. And I loved the idea that Nathan would run in to the fog and just come running right back out again. NP: I think the shroud is a cool idea and it looks really good. BM: And it was always in our plan and we thought it would turn the dial up on what’s happening in Haven. And the same with having the Guard take over; it’s another way of making it different. So this scene [Nathan talking to Dwight where Dwight throws down the chief badge] was always about Dwight taking off the vest NP: That was the image we started with BM: And originally there were versions of this season where we had Dwight from this point on become much more of an antagonist NP: Quite dark BM: So you can still feel it a bit in this scene where these two don’t see eye to eye any more and Dwight is going in a direction that Nathan feels like he can’t follow. So it doesn’t quite pay off as much as it used to, but it still kind of does. NP: What I appreciate about it and the way you can walk that line is he can be antagonistic because he is correct. The nice thing about Dwight is he’s pretty much always the rational character. He’s like; I know you’re thinking of Audrey, I know you’re thinking of helping people, but the reality of the situation is ...this. BM: This was a big deal for us too [Nathan picking up the chief badge that Dwight threw down]. It was his dad’s badge and then it was his for a little while  and now he’s got it  back. Of course - he’s the chief of what now? NP: There’s no station. BM: Exactly. There’s no police. But still, that was a set up for where we’re going at the end of the the season.

[Gloria: There is no cause of death. And there’s only one other body found in Haven like that. Vince; The Colorado Kid] BM: Speaking of set ups for where we’re going later in the season NP: This was a fun one to tie this back in to the mystery that spawned the show. BM: Yeah. SyFy; gotta give them credit, they told us straight up right before we started this season just; Pay off what you can and do it for the fans. And that’s exactly what you want to hear. We had what we were worried was maybe too complicated a plan to pay off all the stuff that we had set up. We’d always intended to do that, but there was just a lot; who killed the Colorado Kid, Croatoan, what happened with Barn, everything. But they were completely on board.

[Nathan and Audrey talking to Charlotte] BM: There was a long time where this was the last scene in the episode. The next scene where we see Duke outside of the shroud was something that you and I really fought for. Just because we felt like it felt like the right last beat. And it told the audience, and Duke, a bit more about the situation Haven’s in. But for time and production concerns, it got cut. We didn’t have Eric for a little while and we never shot the scene. And by the time we were going to shoot it, it was weeks later and we weren’t sure we needed it. But we shot it anyway, but then it got cut for time because we were 45 seconds long. So we had to continually argue to save it. But this scene [with Nathan, Audrey and Charlottte] was great. It was the idea that Nathan is the hopeful one, and he comes up with this plan where he’s like; You are our Barn expert, so let’s build another one. NP: Let’s do it the right way. BM: This was pretty much the tent pole for the season; That Nathan kicks of the mission to build a new Barn. NP: This is giving Charlotte her mission statement. BM: Yeah, and we really liked the idea that it would be Nathan. He actually didn’t have lot to do this episode, but we know that he’s sort of the hopeful heart of the show. NP: And that’s something we played with in the next couple of episodes as well.

[Duke hitching a ride outside the shroud] NP: Beautiful shot BM: Yeah it looks great. And you can’t tell - or maybe you can, from his hair or the trees or something, but this was shot I think two months after the rest of the episode. And we cast the role of the truck driver multiple times. It was fun to write Old Man Trucker dialogue. He felt like stock Old Man Trucker, but it felt like what was necessary. But this was a really important moment for us where the guy’s like; Nah, there’s no such thing as Haven. NP: Yeah because we needed to show that the shroud wasn’t just affecting Haven on the inside but was also erasing Haven from the map from the outside. Because you need to know that no help is coming. BM: So yeah, I hope people like this one. NP: It was a fun one to write. Keep watching and thanks for listening.

[smolbeandrabbles]

Director’s Cut 3: Danny Rayburn

* Well it’s more a focus on our Reader character, but, Danny.

“What was the inspiration behind Liliana and her family? Because they’re all so amazing 😭🙏 and how did you choose the name Devan?” 

Liv, bless you for asking the difficult questions! Now you get a look inside my crazy mind (as if you hadn’t all already with Andrew.)

So, If you thought Andrew was a long post you better grab your favourite drink and your Danny playlist and settle in!

The following specifically refers to our reader character and her family, and the events of Sway and it’s spin-offs, which I will obviously always encourage you to read! 😁 Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6  / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10

Sweet Spot  /  All I Want For Christmas / Good Woman

What was the inspiration behind Liliana and her family?

Before we go into too much detail I want you to imagine 1st January, 2019. And then a girl who had recently purchased Camila Cabello’s first album - late, after being super impressed by her performance opening for Taylor Swift - and watched the first episode of Bloodline AND Dirty Dancing 2 (the trade off for having your mum watch Rogue One with you) in one single day. Anyone who hasn’t listened to Camila’s album, this is essentially Danny’s dance playlist, I don’t make the rules

I had ideas for Danny before I even started to watch. Mostly because when you’re first immersed in the world of Ben Mendelsohn and trawl through blogs, you can’t help but notice Danny. Annnd found out a lot about the show, which caused me to have a BUNCH of misconceptions and create a story in my head that was just... not even remotely close to what Bloodline is.

So here’s the deal, I occasionally like thinking about some of Ben’s characters gender bent, and how that would make them different/similar and affect their stories. I did this with Andrew and Gerry before I did it with Danny (because can we just think about Animal Kingdom if they were female?). And then armed with my assumptions, I came up with a story for Bloodline. “Linzi, why are you telling me this-!?” I hear you cry, but don’t leave the post just yet! Just keep in mind that Jack Ervin was (female) Danny’s restaurant accountant and also will they / won’t they love affair, that uhm. Well they didn’t, because Danny dies.  For all intents and purposes a lot of Jack’s plot points became Lily’s (including bringing back the restaurant). Also I had a great character with a great name that I didn’t want to waste. Jack became Liliana’s dad - and therefore we got: Jack and Liliana Ervin. 

Back to Dirty Dancing 2 - set in Havana, complete with its ‘will they/won’t they’ love story (of different social classes!) and of course, Latin American dancing. To say I borrowed a lot of ideas from this is probably an understatement - but Danny is a Miami boy, and Miami has Little Havana. Quickly it all kinda fell together.  But in this case, Danny is the out of his element American and Liliana (given that her parents are both from Latin American backgrounds) is the dancer. Added to that in DD2 the girls parents are both dancers, I was happy to keep an element of that for our girl too. Jack remained Jack Ervin, with his name actually being Juan Ervin (American Father, Argentinian Mother) but changing his name to Jack to fit in with his Miami high-society persona. Maria (American Mother, Puerto Rican Father) basically has a super cliche Hispanic name, I know (well both of them do but Juan is the equiv. to Jack so that’s how we ended up there) but it worked for me. Liliana’s name... I don’t even know where I got it from - sometimes names just come to me, sometimes I spend hours finding a good one on all these naming sites! 😅 Lily just came to me, I certainly wanted something that could be shortened Liliana->Lily but also something that went with Danny’s name. Liliana Rayburn is a great name. (I know the irony of that, you don’t need to tell me twice!) I need a ship name for them.

Let’s take a little look at their character for a second though: Jack and Maria are meant to be parallel to Robert and Sally. But also the complete opposite. Jack is described as a ruthless businessman who doesn’t care to much about his reputation in business. He’ll just get the job done no matter what the cost. The catch being of course that really Jack is a lovely guy, he cares very much about his family (+ extended family!) and is a well respected member of Miami society. Ruthless yes - but Maria and Lily mean more than the world to him - and eventually Danny too. “No man is good enough for your daughter until one is. And he is.” and also “He would have given you the world, and I would have let him.” Just sayin’ he’s a good father and a good man.  Maria is mentioned a little less than Jack is but I think that’s because I basically want to compare Jack/Danny to Robert/Danny. I also think that Jack has more to do with the overall story; he’s the one with the well known construction company that everyone recognises Liliana’s last name from, the reason that everyone is all over Danny with the “You can’t get involved with Jack Ervin’s daughter!!” spiel. Maria is the quieter character, but spends a lot of time showering Danny with love when she is around. Lily’s parents were all about giving Danny family that loved him unconditionally. A real family. She’s... probably a little more on the ‘stereotypical’ side of Hispanic parents, but there’s a reason for that-! One of my very best friends is Peruvian, and every time I visit him it’s like visiting my second family. Like from the very first time I met them his parents were SO kind, like above and beyond... and so adorable... oh my gosh, I love them so much and they are 100% inspiration for Jack and Maria. Maria is basically his mum. 😁 But more than anything I wanted Jack and Maria that wanted nothing more for their daughter than for her to find someone who loves her. No matter who he is or his background or anything like that. Which was important to me, especially having been through a relationship myself where my family didn’t really approve of him because he wasn’t from the same social class. I’m certainly not about that.

As your tags put it - Jack and Maria are the biggest Danny/Liliana shippers! 😁 (With Javi and Jason a close second! And I won’t leave out Evie and Amanda either!)

Liliana Oh my gosh. My love for her can’t be overstated. I say it every time, but I’ll say it again. When I started her and Danny’s journey on that dancefloor in January 2019 I never would have dreamed I’d be still here now nearing fic number 200. I wasn’t even sure if anyone would have been interested in them enough for me to ever write more than just Sway 1. But, when you’re asked to write a second part then you know it’s got traction and you end up with 10, of course!  Inspiration for Liliana? Good question. A little like I said for Elaiyna with Andrew, I needed a S/O that fit with Danny and his story. I say at the start of part 10 that really it’s her story. And it is, Danny takes her from one night stands with men she meets on the dancefloor to mother of 2 kids in a loving relationship where it’s clear that she will never love anyone else. And it’s his character/personality, being as in character as possible, that leads her there. Liliana never runs out of chances, she forgives Danny for everything he does because she loves him so much. Because she can’t bear to think of life without him, nor what his life would be like if she left. Liliana is... a strong woman who doesn’t know how strong she is. She loves unconditionally and she doesn’t care that Danny is not on top of his game - he’s struggled his whole life, but he does not have to struggle with her. She’s meant to be the easiest thing about his life - home, a safe place, strength and stability.  Danny is her adventure - with all his secrets, and his past, and how much he suffers she’s presented with a problem that she can’t solve, she can’t save,but loves him anyway. Lily will never give up.  The contrast between the two worlds they are in when they meet, and then the one they build together as they grow which takes that contrast and just makes it work. Like they just work - sure I made it that way, but I tried to make it realistic. Love has no barriers, right? It shouldn’t. To quote my characters again: “There’s one fairytale here, and it’s yours.”

I wouldn’t give her a pushover title - sure she never runs out of chances for him (perhaps its arguable that she could walk away but it never occurred to me that that was her personality.) but like, screw his family. She won’t ever forgive them for what they’ve done to him, she won’t ever trust them.  So why does she forgive John? Because that’s her character. That’s what Danny made her. John and Danny’s relationship always fascinated me in the show and it just strikes me that Danny and John were close, even with all that happened. Danny would want Lily to forgive him - and maybe Lily only forgives him FOR Danny, but it’s in her character. She’s tired of all this conflict and all she wants is for John to confirm he did it so she knows for sure.  Liliana has elements of me in her, perhaps a little more than most of my other OCs, elements of my feelings towards characters in the show as I continued to watch, elements of other OC’s of mine (and physically too. Her Psalm tattoo I directly lifted from someone else. Hey, it be that way sometimes!) and elements of all these pieces that inspired me to write her in the first place. 

I mean I don’t know if that really explains it clearly. Because there’s not really one clear inspiration for them - but from a range of different sources and elements. I hope that it even helps explain it a little though! 😅

How did you chose the name Devan?

Oh my gosh, okay. Liv why did you have to ask this question!  So, oh god this is so stupid.  Basically, although I knew that they would have a son, because our characters didn’t know that they were going to have a son, I wanted to give the baby a unisex name. Because I ALSO knew I was going to follow Bloodline canon it was also important to me that Danny be the one to chose the name.  Added to that, like Nolan, I knew that Danny and Lily’s baby was going to keep that Rayburn last name.  Devan Rayburn and Devan Ervin both sound pretty great to me..!

Obviously, it should be Devin. And the only reason I think I chose Devan was because a) I actually thought that was how you spelled it... (I mean I guess so, there’s no other logical reason I can’t have called him Devin... unless I looked at Devin Ervin and thought... ‘that’s basically the same’ and so changed the spelling but it was definitely always written Devan in plans etc) and b) a singer called Devin Dawson.  When I was on my year long internship in the USA I was able to listen to country music radio - specifically the station a family friend worked on. And they were obsessed with a song called “All On Me” by Devin Dawson. (actually it’s a good one for this series, but that’s beside the point!) So I heard his name all the time, and I’m 99% sure that I got it from him. (Also fast forward and I’ve actually now seen the guy in concert and was like “Oh yeah I named a character after you.” so yeah it’s probably Devin Dawson’s fault. )  At the end of part 8 I left a note that says “Devan isn’t easily explainable but I hope you like it.” and honestly, if there’s a bigger story I can’t remember it. I know that ‘Evan’ was another character in my genderbent story but I don’t think I just added the ‘D’ to that... Maybe that was an element of it though?  

Also I’m a sucker for ‘weird’ names or weirdly spelled names - a lot of my OCs fall victim to this - sorry girls! 😅 So it’s unsurprising that he ended up Devan, not Devin. Also I’d pronounce it “Dev-an” with a soft ‘a’ sound... 

Interestingly it took me a little longer to decide on his middle name being Daniel. I guess I’m not sure how good “Devan Daniel Rayburn” sounds... But then I wasn’t about to resist it, and it seems like the kind of decision that Liliana would make.  

I hope that answered your questions Liv! 🙏💜💙 You’re always welcome to ask for further clarification! 😁

---

Thank you as always for being interested in my work! Just gonna remind you all that you can ask for a Fanfic directors cut ! I would love to answer any questions! 🥰😘 

I mean it, I’d beg. Don’t make me get that Danny gif.  

[tsukidotcom]

Haikyuu HC to COVID-19 (Karasuno edition)

This is horrible 💀 im just so bored so I made whatever this mess is KFJSJDMSK enjoy

Hinata Shouyou

huh? isn’t it just the flu?

“No, hinata. People have died from it-“

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH-

goes bananas

whenever someone sneezes or coughs, his soul leaves his body as he runs away to sanitize/wash his hands for a miserably long time.

eats an expired can of peaches thinking it’s his last resort

lowkey happy school is closed because homework sucks

but also highkey hates it because now all volleyball tournaments are closed

then gets all angry when he realizes he’d have to do online school???!!?? like wtf he got jipped.

thinks they could still do volleyball if they did online calls cus if the school can do it,, then vOLLEYBALL CAN

will probably miss half of the class calls from oversleeping/forgetting anyway.

sheepishly ask yamaguchi, yachi or tsukishima for help on assignments/notes. (he will NEVA ask kageyama. he’s always in competition with him here!)

still practices volleyball 24/7 in his backyard or room (maybe even with his baby sister??)

He’s really good at practicing all by himself from practicing all alone in middle school—

but will probably go crazy being alone all the time with his family. he just wants to play volleyball with the team again.

looks up “what to do when you’re bored” or “what to do at home while in quarantine” on youtube

Kageyama Tobio

probably says he’s immune to the corona because he’s just better than everyone else

doesn’t really think it’s real until school shut down because of it

When he sees that corona is airborne he wont know what that means so he’d probably think it’s produced by air itself?? which makes him think air is trying to kill the human race?? and will be so confused as to why it decided to pop up now???

DESPISES online school. He had enough trouble understanding it from the gecko, so now he has to learn it basically all by hiMSELF?!?

And no way is he just gona email the teacher for help. If he does it’s gonna be only once in his lifetime. Anymore than that he thinks he’s doin too much. He doesn’t want his teachers thinking he’s dumb 😭

he says literally nothing during the calls he just tries to pay attention? and fails because he’s on a computer. in his room. alone. he’s bound to daze off or stare at a pen for 5 minutes.

Obvi still practices volleyball. Very much misses it. At least Hinata had his sibling to practice with him. tobio is a lone wolf in his household.

When his mom goes out to get groceries he gives her one of those doctor masks so she doesn’t catch corona.

Few moments later through the internet he realizes that corona is smaller than air molecules so if you can breathe through something you could still get it so he struggles for an hour thinking he just killed his mother

When his mom is back he keeps his distance in case she’s carrying the plague

omg did she just cough or am i imagining things no she definitely coughed she has corona oh oh god

In reality she was just clearing her throat.

is lowkey worrying about everyone and how they are 🥺 (yes, maybe even hinata).

thinks he’s science smart by calling it covid-19 than corona.

Asahi Azumane

He just worries about everyones health

like he just imagines the worst case scenario’s and starts to get really worried if people got it. Always checks on everyone and asks if they’re feeling any symptoms of corona ❤️

He’s either not gonna get it or he gets it and dies there’s no inbetween

but he’s jesus himself so theres no way he nor anyone in his bloodline can get it

is very happy to know that dogs can’t get it.

Takes online school seriously and tries his best

And is honestly so sad school just ended??? even if it’s temporary, he could be learning, playing volleyball, and going about his day instead of staying in a cage. he’s a third year so—how would graduation even go..?

always is up to date on the news !! and notifies everyone if anything important is added/changed.

Always tells everyone to stay safe! Whether through text or before ending a call.

only buys a lot of toilet paper from the fear of there being no toilet paper in stock since evERYONE IS BUYING IT-

Starts to try new hobbies that he put off for the longest time cus quarentine is rlly getting to him.

Is all out a family guy so he doesn’t mind the extra time with his family.

Nishinoya Yu

OAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOA

420 blazin’

thinks going outside means you’re instantly gonna die from corona attacking your white blood cells (????)

but also probably doesnt care as he goes outside like everyday to run around and get rid of energy (and to practice volleyball, of course).

also why is it called white blood cells when blood is red ☠️ smh

Buys 101611018320129 bags of chips because that’s his comfort food

yay more gaming time!!!

Noya🐒: Tanaka do u wana play minecraft 2getr latr?

Tanaka🍌: HELL YEAH!!

doesn’t shower for three days straight because screw personal hygiene!! No more school!!! Can do whatever he wanted!! It’s basically summer!!!

until he’s forced to do online school.

Is def the class clown. Probably somehow kicks the teacher out of the call through a little bit of hacking.

“alright guys so i’ll be you’re substitute teacher for the day-“

tbh acts the same as he would in school. maybe a little more rebellious because, i mean, what is the teacher gonna do? send him to DETENTION? call his mOMMY?

Calls/spams literally everyone in his contacts because he’s so bored and lonely. Answer him!! Y’all will be on facetime for hours!!

He’s fun to facetime.

Will call you a loser if you don’t have an apple iPhone because then he can’t facetime you and facetiming is one of his favorite things to do to pass time (besides gaming)

HE A TRUE GAMER

Okay but he lowkey still tries at school for the sake of his grades and his future ;-; maybe calls asahi or sugawara for help??

always looks up his homework on the internet to see if he can get an answer key or something (he did that anyway even before corona but)

will do one subject for 3 hours thinking he’s finally done with everythinf till he realizes he has like 4 other subjects and needs to do those too.

Sending memes all the time

Tsukishima Kei

oh, what about corona again?

honestly could give NO fucks??. like ABSOLUTELY ZERO. nonxistent.

doesn’t even remember it’s still happening half the time.

is surprisingly very knowledgeable about corona.

he’s just smart and sciency¿ so he understands the ins and outs of corona like how it works and how its spread.

so if you tRULY want any update or background info on the corona virius, ask Tsukishima.

bitch don’t touch me you have rabies.

doesn’t care that he’s obligated to stay at home because he would have stayed either way. he very much likes being alone.

might go a little crazy cooped up in his room so he’ll hang with his brother/family or go outside before he says ‘okay that’s enough’ and goes back to his room.

isolation? oh okay *puts on headphones*

he rlly gonna be rocking it out in his room cus he can listen to music all day any day

developes a really bad sleep schedule since he had no way to get rid of the energy he got rid of at school.

still a huge tease so he says everyone has the corona virius.

is never online on social media which means he’s never up to date with his frIENDS. Doesn’t have a clue what those dipshits are doing and could care less (besides yamaguchi,, they probably facetime or call thru skype or something).

I bet the whole volleyball squad has a groupchat and honestly he puts all notifs on mute cus his phone keep goin DING DING DING DI DING ID DID IDKNG DING DIG

Brother: Omg why are you getting so many text messages?

Tsukki: Shut up

if he is online on the gc and he texts it would be simple replies like “Hi” “Okay.” “No.” “Goodbye.” and then he’s gone for another week

every first year is begging on their knees for tsukishima to give the answers or help them out and he obviously says: go do the hw yourselves idiots

besides yamaguchi!!!! again!! cus theyre gay for each other

maybe practices once in awhile with his brother or alone in his backyard but he doesn’t care

Tanaka Ryuunosuke

buys 101817 pounds of toilet paper because everyone else is? but not because of the same reason as asahi. he thinks toilet paper is the cure to corona.

GO STUPID AAAAAAAAA GO CRAZY AAAAAAAAAAA-

probably has a part time job at a grocery store so he still has to go to work 😭 i dont even know how he could have a job in the first place he’s probably always late-

still gamin with noya of course

GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM IM PLAYING MINECRAFTT

also buys like all the junk food thats in stock. and since he works at the grocery store he gets a ton of coupons and deals.

texts Kiyoko everyday goodmorning ❤️❤️❤️ and goodnight 😘😘 texts just to be left on read.

“i love it when she ignores me !!!”

scrolls through tiktoks for 1000 hours to pass time

School Is For Losers!!

similar to noya, he thought it was basicaly summer until he realized they were gonna be doing online school. literally had a fit and said he didnt wanna do jack squAt

Laughs so hard when nishinoya somehow kicks the teacher out of the call he’s like laughing so loud and hard he starts crying

all of the sudden has a better view on school

gets excited when he sees nishinoya on the call

makes funny and ugly ass faces when the teacher isn’t looking. everyone laughs and the teacher’s like 🤨

probably uses the green screen effect so he can change hus background (somehow) and accidentally misclicks a file so a girl wit a bikini becomes his background for .5 seconds before changing it to a cursed meme:

doesn’t get half the shit the teacher is talking about

but it’s okay because the half he doesn’t get is the other half noya gets

and the half noya doesnt get is the orher half tanaka gets

they’re two peas in a pod 🥰

until they try explaining it to each other and suddenly get confused?? mental malfunction ¿?

yeah im SMART!!!

s -

m -

a -

r - penis

t -

Daichi Sawamura

quite calm about the whole coronavirus

like he knows it is serious and understands how it is spread but he’s still calm about it??

tells everyone to sanitize and wash hands on a regular. and social distancing!!

honestly still wakes up like he does on normal school days and does all his academics just fine.

he even does gym activities (besides volleyball) for 30 minutes to an hour!!!! he be running on that treadmil! getting stronk!

does each subject on his own for 20-40 min each day. he’s really good at self discipline

makes sure sugawara and asahi are up to date on school work and will gladly help.

sadly can’t help the first years (and probably second years) because that info is deep in his brain and basically forgot how to do it after a year or two of not using it.

VERY VERY VERY sad that volleyball nationals are cut off. this is his last year and for it to be??? gone??? just because of some flu?!?! hates it.

he wishes school to go back and still has hope that school will go back to normal in a couple of weeks (even though it’s a slim chance).

asks the teacher questions whenever he has questions. He’s also vv considerate so he’ll ask questions he knows the answer to but asks them for anyone who’s confused ab it/wants to ask but is too shy. (literally i lov daichi sm)

Eats a healthy amount of everything

asks asahi for any updates on corona even though he’s quite up to date himself. he just wanna make sure he didn’t miss anything.

also doesn’t mind being around his family. he’ll do more chores around the house to help his parents out :> he’s literally perfect wtf

def does worry about everyone in the volleyball gc and anyone else he has contact with. Will also email classmates and ask if they’re doing all right. Even away from volleyball he’s a team player ☺️✌️

Is happy for the rest of the day when asahi tells him dogs can’t get corona.

Yamaguchi Tadashi

oaoaiquqhdkoaiaagadjsiwi?

doesn’t know what to believe anymore

keeps in touch with everyone!! always online 24/7 on social media, vball gc, you name it.

Literally everyone is acting so normal why are people so calm am i the only one worrying about this and the worlds future like this year has been really bad so far for not just me but the whole nation actually the entire world honestly like war almost broke out in january and now this corona stuff is really buttering my crissont the wrong way-

Even though tsukishima literally gives No Fucks, yamaguchi is the complete opposite.

like tsukki and yamaguchi call on skype and eVERY TIME yamaguchi starts with ‘how have you been? do you feel sick at all? have you drank enough water today?’ and so on

“What are you even worrying about?”

“Well...what if you get the corona virius?... it can be deadly, you know!! Thousands of people have died from it!!! The fact school is shutting down and people are panicking is making me feel like i should be panicking-“

Tsukki will then snarkily reassure him it’s fine and people their age are the least likely to get it bad.

Yamaguchi will feel a little better afterwords

“Thank you, Tsukki!”

Tsukki will ‘tch’ it off

Even though he gets really good grades he has triuble finding motivation to do any school work?? doing school work in his own home? 😐

His home was kinda a place he can chill whereas school is a place he can be fully focused

but now his home is ALSO school??!!?

Luckily he understands the work, at least.

When he sees tsukishima on the call, too, he instantly says hello.

“Tsukki!! Hey!! 😁”

“Shut up.”

“Gomen, Tsukki.”

Yeah. Even when they aren’t at school, he’s still the same as always.

He takes extra care of his family and always stays in touch with other relatives. Especially grandpa and grandma. THE SECOND he learned elderly people are at more risk you bet your ass he’s calling them making sure they’re okay. He checks up on them everyday now.

He peobably practices volleyball a little, too. He’s more focused on schoolwork though.

Sugawara Koushi

Have you guys ate dinner yet? 🥺

obviously checking up on everyone

he would fail as a mother if he didn’t.

Actually reads in his free time?? He finally has time on his hands to read these books so.... here we are!

Wakes up at a scheduled time everyday (minus weekends. Maybe sleeps for an extra hour or so).

He dresses in pjs rather than actual clothes because he’s not going anywhere with this social distancing thing.

Always tries to lighten the mood when all the students are on the online call. Maybe crack some joke or innocently play around with the effects.

He still pays close attention in class and does quite well on his own. No help from his parents! He can do everything on his own! He a big boi!

Does homework really well, too. Probably does extra work or more work than needed just because it makes him feel good afterwords.

Honestly i can see him cooking in his free time. If he doesnt feel like reading or scrolling mindlessly through his phone, he gonna cook.

Will make the best cookies in the universe.

HAS A HECK OF A SWEET TOOTH. NOT A DAY GOES BY WITHOUT HIM GETTING HIS PRETTY HANDS ON SUM TREAT

Honestly isn’t too good with exercise so he might gain a few pounds or grow the smallest chub 🥺🥺🥺 he would be so cute omfg.

is realy involved with his family!! they play a board/card game every friday night and have the best time.

if he has a dog, cat, or literally any animal you know he’s gona be hanging with them since he has more time.

Still! Playing! Volleyball! I mean by now every boy is practicing at least a little bit. He would probably be in his backyard playing volleyball with his family. Theyy’d set up a net and everythin! They’re all rookies at it but he still cherishes the moments with them.

It’s honestly still practice. Better than nothing

He talks about how his family plays volleyball and everyone is so jealous like 😭😭 makes him more grateful hearing half the volleyball team saying they have to practice alone.

Watching youtube videos of random videos/vines making him giggling.

“Hey, Dachi, look at this video.”

IS A SWEETHEART STFU !!!

[jamiedc-they-them]

Who you were VS Who you are (Platonic)

IMAGINE: You had to find out where you came from. You had to know. No matter how much it hurt. Or what it cost. Your friends wouldn’t let that happen though. They wouldn’t lose you to your desire for answers.

You leant against the tree, watching your sister in her training. Watching her be fully at peace with herself and her surroundings. You didn’t want to have to do this. To interrupt her meditation with your own burning issue that never left you alone. You knew it wasn’t fair on her. On anyone, really.

“You can come to me for anything, (y/n).” She assured you when you had both started you friendship. She’d always made sure to make time to help you with your issues. No matter how silly you deemed them. She always treated them like top priority.

She felt your presence behind her. She felt the slight conflict brewing within you. Did it disturb her? A little, she’d never admit it though. Knowing that it would shake your confidence. She appreciated that waited until she had finished her training. Instead of just interrupting like some people had done. She knew they didn’t mean to. But she liked that you and the other members of your family gave her the time she needed to fully feel at peace before she’d try and help you guys out in any way she could.

She opened her eyes, dong a flip to land on the ground with some skill. She grew a small smile as she felt your energy lift a little at her move. Happy that she had somewhat helped without even trying.

She turned to you. Finally, ready to help you in any way that she could.

“Hi…” She frowned at your nervous tone. She approached you, kneeling down to your level, looking at you with an empathetic and calm gaze. One that she hoped would help you find the confidence to ask the question you had come to ask her. She clocked the way you avoided eye contact every so often. Looking off the forest, playing with your hands.

You met her gaze, gulping slightly as you tried to find that courage. Finally, you took a calming breath and decided to just get it out there, “Can you help me find my parents?” Her eyes widened at the bluntness of the question. She, internally, appreciated that you didn’t try and word it any differently and sell it as something else. You just said what you wanted.

Part of her was also terrified of this moment. She never wanted to visit this moment. She knew what it could do to you. She didn’t want to see you go through that pain that it could bring you. Her eyes showed that slight fear. Your eyes showed it back as you awaited her answer.

“I – Are you sure. You might not like what you –”

“Rey.” Your desperation in your tone made her stop, “You know how my broken mind words. Whatever the truth it. It can’t be any worse than what this thing’s cooked up.” You pointed to your mind. The comment didn’t sit well with her. She decided not to comment on it, for both of your sakes.

“I’m just saying. You don’t need a name to be someone.” Her words didn’t have the effect you wanted on you. It didn’t have the effect she wanted at all. It had the opposite.

“You found out you were. Only seems fair that I get a shot at it too. Can’t be any worse, can it?” She couldn’t help but be a little hurt by your words. It wasn’t the way you said them, it was just what you said. The way you blew passed her advice.

The others had agreed instantly, they boarded the falcon. Placing themselves behind you both. Rey looked at you, giving you a nod. They were ready.

You started the engines of the falcon. Pushing the lever up, and slowly lifted you guys up. Before flicking the switch, you entered lightspeed.

To you, it felt selfish. Forcing them to come along and help you on a desperate search that could either get you guys killed or end up getting you now where. They were quick to assure you that it didn’t matter where it led. They’d support you. Because, that was what family did.

You and Poe had stayed in the cockpit. Rey, Finn and Rose were playing on the holo chess table. She was never very good at it. But it was a way to pass the time as you travelled to your destination. Rey had been forced to cross a line she didn’t want to. She had to enter your mind, the deepest and darkest part that you kept hidden. She went through the memories there, a man had always appeared. One who had left you at the age you had met Rey at originally. She had then taken a moment to try and find his signature. It took a lot of her energy. But she pushed and pushed. You had started to become worried for her. But she only kept going. She couldn’t let you down.

She’d found his signature. It was faint, but there. He was a while away from you all. He was your only hope of finding anything to do with your parents.

She’d hoped that you didn’t end up with a shock like she had. Learning that she was the descendant of the monster they were hunting. The one who had started all this. It was fitting, though. For his lineage to put an end to his reign. For the bloodline of the one who started the turmoil to be the one to end it.

Poe had seen you tense figure as you checked the ship absentmindedly. He knew that you needed some space. Getting up, he placed a hand on your shoulder to show his support before he walked to join the others.

You slumped down in your chair. It was nice to have the place to yourself as you arrived. You didn’t even know the man you were looking for. Yet he had something to do with your past. You didn’t know what, you were terrified as to what it was.

You accepted Rey when she confided in you about her identity. You were sure she’d do the same. Still, there was always that voice in the back of your mind that told you they wouldn’t. Rey had the same voice in her head.

 You knew that the voice was wrong. That the doubt was wrong to have. It didn’t matter though. It was there. That was it. That was the truth. Now you just had to find the rest of the truth. You needed to. You needed the closure. You needed to know.

You arrived at your location. The place Rey had tracked him too. The place was on the edges of the unknown places in the galaxy. You’d brought your friends out so far for this. That, and your want to find the truth kept you going. Kept that doubts at bay.

Kept the bad feeling you were having about the journey and what awaited you at bay, kept it locked away.

It still ate away at you as you led the others through the planet. It was pretty. Very pretty. Trees with circular and odd shapes surrounded you. It felt like something out of a dream. Something that you mind would create for you to play in when it was having one of its good days. The feeling seemed to dissipate as others all looked around it in slight awe as well. Rey followed her friends in their actions. Before her eyes settled on you as you stretched our arms out and spun yourself around. Embracing the odd life that seemed to brim here.

A variation of fireflies surrounded you. Dancing around you. You let out a laugh as they did so. Rey smiled, happy that you were happy. You had been having a lot of bad days recently. So, for once, seeing you at peace made her feel like she was as well. For a small amount of time, your doubt had subsided. And you were filled with pure joy. She hoped that this voyage would bring you more of that feeling.

In her mind, even then, she knew that it was unlikely that that would be the end result. Still, she hoped.

“(y/n)” Finn called your attention to him. Turning to him, you saw a cave entrance. They all waited as you approached it. Holding your hand out behind you, Poe gave you a flashlight. You turned it on. It was immediately dwarfed by Rey’s sabre. She gave you a teasing smile. You rolled your eyes but returned it with a shake of you head.

Rey was right beside you as you both led your friends. Her sabre was the brightest, but you still kept your own flashlight out. Everyone was now using their own version of a light source. Scouring the walls. Along them, you saw patterns. Drawings of people.

You weren’t force sensitive like Rey. Yet you still found yourself being drawn towards one of the drawings. You heard it calling out to you. Your hand ran over the image. That being of a young child being held back as a ship flew away. You heard cries of a young female, “Come back!” She screamed. The other figure holding her back.

You flinched away from the drawing. Your senses coming back to you in an instant. Your breath was uneven. Your eyes wide. You looked around, seeing your friends were gone.

Despite where you stayed in your younger years before you met Rey. You’d always hated the dark. The feeling of the unknown it gave you. The feeling that it isolated you. That it was influencing you in some way.

Rey had that literally, with the dark side of the force. She had reminded you that, despite not being force sensitive, you still had a pull to it. It was all to do with emotions. You certainly had a lot of them buzzing around you. Most negative. You couldn’t help that. But, still, it scared you.

Like right now, you were alone. On a planet you did not know. Now knowing if your friends where even still alive anymore, or if they’d gotten lost or hurt. Or –

You’d bumped into someone. That person quickly caught you and held you shoulders. Looking up, you saw it was Rose. She hugged you, you were quick to return it.

“Oh, thank god. Guys, I found (him/her)!” She called out. The others came towards her voice. They all let out a sigh of relief when they saw you alive and well.

“What happened?” Rey asked, seeing your disturbed look. You didn’t get the chance to give your version of the answer.

“(He/She) had a vision. Found one of the carvings in the wall.” You all turned to the man who had spoken. He was old, in his last few years. He stepped out the dark. Your friends had all taken a step forward, but Rey was next to you. All eyes filled with mistrust. All prepared to reach for their retrospective weapons if needed. Rey was still holding her sabre. One the man’s eyes fell upon.

His lips turned upwards. Rey moved her finger towards the button that would start a seemingly inevitable conflict.

“How about that bracelet there? I’ll tell you all you want to know about you, kid.” His offer was answered before they could warn you about it. To tell you not to give into it. Not to go with his deal. To find another way of finding the information.

Rey turned to you to try it, only to see you pulling off your bracelet that you had carried since you were ten. The hurt she felt earlier multiplied by the fact that you were willing to give away an item that meant so much to you both for even a slither of information.

You didn’t even look to them; you only kept your eyes on the man. You held out the bracelet. Taking it, he rolled it around before looking back at you.

“They gave you to me to take you somewhere else. I was meant to meet them at a ship to leave. Thing was, they weren’t there. Never saw them again that day.” Your story told you one thing. They were still on Jakku.

“Who leaves a child defenceless on a place like Jakku?” Rey spat as you started to leave. Her anger and distaste for the man. He made sure to keep the bracelet in view as she spun it, moving closer to her. The two having a tense stare off. You were still walking away, her friends stayed with her.

“(He/She) found you, didn’t (he/she)?” He asked, voice holding the same amount of hatred and distrust. He eyed her up and down to show that he wasn’t afraid.

“Go find you (brother/sister) and help (him/her). You got what you wanted.” Begrudgingly, she did. Even if she made a note in her mind of the location. Remembering to come back here after all was said and done.

The others may have watched you sacrifice of bit of who you are to find a part about who you were. But she’d be damned if she let you lose that part.

She was going to get that bracelet back.

 Finn sat with you in the cockpit this time. Watching you as had a face of pure concentration. He saw beneath that look. Seeing a sense of excitement. A sense that this would magically heal the wound of abandonment. That this would make you whole once again.

He didn’t want to be the one to tell you that the unlikeliness of that was slowly mounting. Becoming more and more prevalent. Harder and harder to ignore.

“What do you want to find down there?” He asked, you didn’t pause your actions. In fact, if anything, you increased your movement. Seemingly using the movement to distract you from having to answer fully.

“My parents. Find why they left me. Maybe even take them back with us, if we’re lucky.” Finn understood to want to find where you came from. He did, truly. He just knew the dangers that came with it as well.

When you started clearing the last remnants of the First Order, Finn was slowly losing himself. Especially in the places that held the children. Sure, that had to do part with the trauma. The PTSD attacking him whenever he set foot in those places. Seeing those helpless children and setting them free.

You and the others had seen as he started becoming more and more hellbent on finding where he came from. Trying to find files on him. Or, on his parents. Anything. He’d go for anything. Any whisper, any small hint that would push him forward.

So, he understood. But he also knew what could happen to you if they didn’t help tame this side to you.

He looked out the door, knowing that the others were probably talking about the same thing he was thinking. And thinking of ways to help you. He had pitched a few ideas. But he knew they were looking at other options to help you should all this go sideways. Should all this go wrong.

How to help pick up the pieces should they fall apart further than they already had.

 You stood at the ramp, Rey by your side with the others behind you. You stared at the ramp, but you already knew what awaited you. The endless hell of sand in a lawless place. Maybe there were some areas that weren’t as bad. You didn’t know those places. You just knew this one. The one where you grew up. The one where you started on this journey.

The one where you were (hopefully, in your head) find some answers to help bring it to an end.

“You ready?” Your elder sister asked, she felt the nerves as well. Both from her and from you. She didn’t exactly love being back here either. But, if it would help you, she’d do it.

They were here after all.

You nodded, but still didn’t take your eyes off of the ramp. Your mouth slightly parted.

“Hey.” She waited until you turned to her. She gave you an assuring smile, “You’ve got this.” You nodded, even if you didn’t fully believe them, they had helped a little.

Your hand hit the button, slowly the ramp lowered.

There it was. Home. It was a morbid homecoming. Even without the present circumstances and the countless amount of possibilities that your journey could end. It was still a morbid homecoming. Rey Skywalker, better known as Rey from Jakku. And her (brother/sister)/best friend, (y/n) of Jakku. Coming home for one last hoorah.  

You were the first to step out. The place was silent. Back when you lived here, you liked it. No, you adored the silence. Now? Now it was off putting. You hated the silence. So, used to noise around you. Be that from war or from the base in general.

You envied Rey’s ability to find some sort of peace with meditation. To have a moment where everything felt controllable. That she could deal with it all. That it wasn’t always closing in on her.

Maybe it was an act. Maybe she had those feelings. Maybe she did have moments where she broke. Where everything seemed too much. And, yet, despite those moments, she still made time for you. She still helped you.

You kept your thoughts silent as you walked through your old home planet. Your friends behind you in their own conversation. They kept looking at you every so often. Instead of the reason just being as you were at the front. It was because you were subject of their conversations.

Rey looked to Finn, he nodded at her in confirmation that he too felt your emotions becoming more and more cynical. Despite the slight burst that occurred at the news. They could both feel that you were ripping yourself about something.

It was mix of dread and negative questions that were pilling and pilling. They’d all been there before when the explosion had occurred. When it all became too much in a physical sense. When you broke even further. When you finally tried something. Whether that was push them away, get in a fight. Or… Or something.

That was why Rey didn’t want you to do this. She knew what it could lead to. How it could be the thing that pushed you over the edge fully. That was why it all leading back to Jakku made her anger intensify.

She didn’t want to have to go through the pain of nearly losing you again.

You heard laughter, you crouched down. Moving to a piece of wreckage to use as cover. The others ran to your position. You all looked, seeing one man pissing on something. The other drinking some water. He still laughed at something his friend said.

“Oh….” Rose’s voice was soft, but it trailed off. You moved to her, between her and Poe. You looked over their part of the cover. You finally saw what caused her words. Ones that were filled with empathy.

It was two metal pieces stuck together to form a kind of cross. Barely held together by rope. And the man was pissing on it. Like it was nothing.

It wasn’t nothing, you knew what it was. You knew who was in there.  They all did.

You were over the cover the next moment. Ignoring your friends as you pulled out your blaster.

The one with the bottle dropped it, letting out a curse as he reached for his own blaster. His hand slipped over the it. His hand had slipped as there was now a blaster shot in his head. The other turned, he got one in the stomach and one in the chest. He was still alive. His piss now staining his trousers and the sand.

You moved over to him, rage fuelling you. You almost reached him, when Rey was in front of you, arm raised to stop you. She tried to send some calming thoughts and emotions through the force. Try and calm you that way.

“Get out of my head, Rey…” Your voice was low. Dangerously low. She was unnerved that she heard it from you. The way it was more a growl and so unlike you.

In that moment, you were more terrifying to her than any Sith or even Palpatine was. Or a night of Ren. Or anything in the moment.

She was the only thing stopping you from fully losing yourself.

“You don’t have to do this –”

“He was pissing on them, Rey! Pissing on them like they were nothing!” Your rage could be understood. She could see your perspective. She could even understand you rage. But she had to get you out of the spiral. She couldn’t let you fully lose yourself in this moment like she had when she and Kylo were fighting on the Death Star. She lost herself then. She knew how terrified she was of herself then.

She had to stop you before you reached that point.

“You don’t want to be like them –” She was cut off by your hollow laugh, “Be like them? I don’t know who they were! And now I never will!”

“They left you, just like mine –”

“To protect you! They told you that they loved you before they did it! Mine dumped with… Whatever his name was. And left me! But they stayed on this damn planet! They didn’t even try to find me!” You were full on crying at this point. Full on breaking down. Rey’s own vision had filled with tears as your words gained more and more in volume. More desperation for her to understand.

She did. She absolutely did. That was what made her do her next move. One she’d never wanted to do.

“It’s alright, it’s just me. It’s just me.” You heard her voice in your head. Your eyes displaying hurt and loathing at the action. Her eyes showed an apology. But she kept going.

“I know you won’t believe me. But I understand that pain. I was still left. For whatever reason. I was still abandoned. They had a reason; they faced their death with no questions. But I was still left. That hurt is still there.

You don’t’ deserve it. Neither of us do. Not us both, and Finn. No one deserves that. Don’t go this way though. Don’t become them –”

“How? How do I do that?” Your voice in reply was desperate. Both calmer than before.

“You don’t give yourself to the dark like they did. You don’t become them by being the bad guy. You do that by fighting against the dark with the light that’s inside of you. You win by being you.” Her words had an effect on you. This time, the one she wanted.  She knew she’d gotten through to you now.

You were in her arms the next moment. Her own hurt with her parents allowing her to let out some of her own pain as well.

You and Rey had both left the company of your friends to go to your old home. Rose looked to the grave that was poorly put together. Reaching into her bag, she found what she wanted. She went to the grave, removing the wires, she brought out a wielding mask. And went to work on it.

“Should we go check on them, or?”

“No, they’ll be fine. They need this.” Poe nodded at Finn’s answer. The man sensed that you both had felt more peaceful after the confrontation. How you both seemed to be calmer now that you had let it out.

You ran your hand down the markings on the wall with a kind of fond look. A reminder of how, not too long ago, you add to it numbly.

Now the wait was over. Your family had arrived. Just not in the way you had both expected. Rey approached you from behind, holding your old doll in front of your face. You laughed as you looked at it. Rey let out her own one. This one filled with fondness of memories. You took the doll, running your had over it. Remembering how you both used to re-enact the fighting from the wars that caused all this. That caused the home you lived in.

“You want to take it?” You nodded at her answer. Placing it in your bag. You looked one more time at the markings. Rey repeated your earlier action. Both of you having a moment of silence to fully be ready to let the place go. Maybe even hold the new pair of siblings who wanted a better life for themselves.

“HELP!” The cry gained your attention. You were both out the door and up the ramp that started this whole adventure. The ramp that you both ran up and found BB on the other side of. This time, the ramp held a girl being dragged away. You both looked at her with the same expression at the monsters taking her away.

You ran down, you fired your blaster at one. Rey force pushed another. A third swung at you, you ducked out the way and connected your fist with his face. Rey lit her sabre and scared another off. You let your one go, running off into the distance. Hopefully not going to do that again.

You turned to the girl, kneeling down to her height. Eyes hopefully communicating that you weren’t a threat. Ones that held empathy and calmness. She looked at you with panic eyes. Moving them to your sister for a moment, before back to you. She took calming breaths. You both only waited with patience as she slowly gathered herself. Somewhat putting the unknown amount of broken pieces together. To make them hold together for a little longer.

She had gotten herself to a place where she nodded. Looking at you with less fearful, but still not completely trusting eyes. Slowly, you reached out a hand. She looked at it, going over the possibilities in her mind. Before deciding to take it. You rose up, brining her with you. You noticed that you were both pretty much the same height.

“I’m (y/n), over there is Rey. We’re from the resistance.” Your voice was calm. The girl’s eyes widened at the words.

“(y/n) from Jakku and Rey Skywalker?!” You bit your lip at your mention, but still nodded. Not even knowing that you included in the apparent legends that you both too once thought were only myths.

She embraced you. You stumbled a little but found your footing and returned the gesture. Letting her have this moment of peace. This moment of what was probably just sheer terror. You didn’t know her story. How long she’d been here. If she was alone. It didn’t matter. All that mattered was this moment.

This moment where the light had won.

“Are you alone?” She nodded, looking at the floor sadly. You cupped her face, turning her to you. You gave her a soft smile, “We have some friends. And we have a place. It’s off planet. But… We could take you there. Or, we can help you set up here.”

She thought about it, you only kept your eyes on her. Noticing more of her features, her long blonde hair held dirt in it. Her eyes had bags underneath. Clothes having tears in certain places. She looked like a mess.

She reminded you both of how you started. In rags, now heroes in the eyes of people.

“Go with you.”

She had; the others had accepted her with ease. A new member and new friend. The journey back took a while. So, you all had a chance to fully meet her. Help her realise she was safe now.

You knew you could only do so much. That the words would do so much. Actions spoke louder than words. You knew the therapist would get a new client. Not that you were sure they’d mind. It was their job after all. Plus, they’d told you when you first went that seeing clients make any type of progress made their own day better. So…

Rey closed her eyes, feeling the world around her. The life, the death. The light and the dark. And the balance that sat in between of it. The peace of it helped her start to float. Maybe she wasn’t wrong. Maybe the force really did help make things float. Or, in this case, person.

She felt your presence. This one more at ease. It took a little more time with your more positive emotions. But she still felt you leaning against the same tree. Waiting for her once again.

She did the same flip as she landed, feeling your mood increase. Again, turning to you and kneeling down to your height. This time, though, you both held smiles.

“How’d therapy go?”

“Well. Gave me a breathing exercise to try.” Rey nodded, making a note to ask them about it.

“Can I ask you a question?” She nodded, gaze ready for whatever you wanted to ask her, “You said all that about names. But made yourself a Skywalker. Why?”

“I was a Palpatine. That name isn’t good for anyone. Besides, he didn’t raise me. He tried to kill me. The Skywalker’s helped us. Taught us for as long as they could. Still can. If anyone asks who were my parents. I’d say them in a heartbeat.”

She held out your bracelet. You looked at her, she nodded with enthusiasm. Wanting you reclaim what you rightfully yours.

“You can be who ever you want to be. Names mean nothing, blood means nothing. It’s all up to you.”

You started to live by that code after that day.

[lia-jones]

Growing Pains - Chapter Twenty Six - The Rube Goldberg Trap

Author’s Note: Writing this first part was probably simultaneously the most scary and delightful I had done in my life. Finishing it was like the end of an era. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did writing, and if you did, please let me know. Your words and support are my bread and butter, and you have no idea how brighter my day becomes when I hear from you. So, it’s see you later, for now. Second part will be coming out soon! Lots of love!

Since I can remember, I have been fascinated with Rube Goldberg machines, even before I knew what they were called. A Rube Goldberg machine is also known as a chain reaction machine, which is basically a complicated contraption that requires a certain number of actions, one always leading to another, to obtain a single, usually very simple, purpose.  It’s inventor, Rube Goldberg, invented them for comic purposes, but I was fascinated by how it seemed to represent the way fate affects our lives, should such a thing exist.

Because if fate was a real thing, there was a reason why I quit the piano and decided to take Economics instead. And my change of career led to me meeting Daniel, and falling in love with him. Which, of course, led to the abuse, and me coming to Loveland to change my life. Simultaneously, that also led to me taking my doctorate, as well as my internship in LFG, and meeting Victor.

If fate was a real thing, there was a reason why my car broke down in the middle of the main avenue that rainy night, and a reason for Victor to stop and help me instead of moving along. There was a reason for him to startle me in the coffee room and make me spill coffee all over myself, because otherwise he wouldn’t have asked for me to present my own reports, and I wouldn’t have argued with him and wouldn’t have tried to quit the job, and Victor would’ve gone to Creekwood by himself, and we wouldn’t get to know each other, or fall in love.

Of course, believing in fate is always a nice thought. Even if we make mistakes, we can say it was fate. It was meant to be that way, because if we didn’t mess up, this or that wouldn’t have happened. Even the faultiest of actions can be seen as part of the Rube Goldberg machine, and we can cut ourselves some slack. It is faulty when we look at it closely. But if we look at the bigger picture, after the complicated contraption does its job, it fits perfectly. Its purpose is clear.

Unless, of course, the contraption leads to an unwanted result. That is a new kind of scary.

My presence in that fashion show seemed to be the push on the button of another Rube Goldberg machine, leading to a series of events, and I still couldn’t put my finger on all of them. As far as I was concerned, the contraption was still in motion, one event leading to the other. It began at the show, which probably caused a paparazzi to see me, which piqued the interest of that reporter who wrote the article, which lead to… this.

The morning after the article, I spoke with the Dean, reassuring her that the situation would be dealt with. Since Victor Lee was one of the people involved, she was relieved almost immediately, knowing he wouldn’t possibly let anything escape his watchful eye. After my classes and a brief meeting with my research team, I headed to LFG to meet the lawyers, and see what could be done about this whole thing.

I arrived at LFG to find Victor already in the conference room with the lawyers.

“Gentleman, please inform Miss Jones of what you believe we should do.” Victor ordered as I sat down. He was in CEO mode, bossy, poker face in place.

“We believe we may sue them for violation of privacy.” One of them turned to me. “Your abuse is a serious matter, and we can allege that the fact that they interviewed your abuser actually gave him the idea to try to reconnect with you.”

“Oh my God. Please don’t remind me.” I held my head between my hands.

Victor gave me a reassuring look. It made me feel safer, and I relaxed.

“We have to say, however, this may not work.” The other lawyer advised. “But the consequences of a lawsuit, even if the publisher is deemed not guilty of the charges, will be disastrous for them. We are talking about legal expenses, long days in court, not to mention no one will want to have anything to do with the company that crossed LFG’s CEO.”

“They will lose all their investors and go bankrupt.” I concluded. They all nodded, apparently pleased that I understood it. “But is this just a threat, or are we really going to go through with it?”

“Your choice.” Victor offered. “Whatever you decide, it’s final.”

“If we go through with this, if we press charges, my abuse will be discussed to no end, right?”

They all nodded.

“I don’t want that. And I have no intention of sending hundreds of people to unemployment either. I just want this to go away and maybe to send a warning that my personal business is off-limits.”

The lawyers all looked at Victor for approval. He gave them a small nod.

Suddenly, the door to the conference room opened, and an elegant tall man in his 60’s entered, his expression unsmiling and unforgiving. That expression alone would be a dead giveaway to who he was, if I hadn’t seen his picture in Victor’s biography. It was Victor’s father, Gregory Lee. Goldman followed shortly after him, a panicked expression on his face. And everyone in the room, except for me and Victor, were immediately affected by his presence, looking all uncomfortable and suddenly ceremonious.

Mr. Lee senior turned to the lawyers, speaking like he was actually their boss and ran the whole company himself.

“I need a moment alone with my son. Make yourselves busy elsewhere.”

Without another word, they quickly left the room, practically bowing to the man. The more I looked at him, the more I saw the resemblance in Victor. It was like he was a younger version of his father… except maybe for the eyes. The elder man turned to me.

“Did you not hear me? Leave.”

I looked at him, wondering what chip he had on his shoulder to be so rude. Victor intervened.

“Father, this is-“

“I know exactly who she is.” Mr. Lee interrupted, annoyed. “Her face is all over the tabloids.”

“What exactly are you doing here?” Victor asked, showing slight annoyance.

“I came to Loveland on business.” Gregory answered, sitting down. “Imagine my disappointment when one of my assistants brings me a copy of one of those dirty tabloids, featuring my son and… her.”

“I don’t see why is that any of your business.” Victor stated, cool as a cucumber.

“Ungrateful child.” The father spoke, his tone severe. “What do you think you are doing? Is that how you take care of our name, of your reputation? By getting yourself infatuated and letting our name be dragged through the mud? First it was that producer, now this? You’re too much of a fool, always acting on your romantic whims. Look at her. She has no family name, no worth of her own. Are you really considering continuing our bloodline with this girl? With a filthy immigrant?”

“I’m sorry, I won’t let you disrespect me like that!” I stood up.

“Someone should put a muzzle on you.” Victor’s father warned.

“Someone should try.” I retorted, letting him know with my eyes I was not scared of him.

“Enough!” I heard Victor say. “You said your piece. Now leave.” He got up, and walked to the door, opening it.

Gregory Lee walked proudly towards the door. He stopped by Victor, shooting a little more venom.

“I’m glad your mother isn’t here to see this. She would be ashamed of you.” And with that he left.

Victor looked like he took a major blow to the stomach. His eyes were red, his jaw clenching in anger. I had never seen him this vulnerable. He closed the door behind his father, and for a moment I was almost afraid to go to him, fearing he would break under my touch. He looked so fragile. It was evident that Victor’s tender spot was his father… and the mention of his mother.

He leaned against the frosted glass panels of the conference room, taking a deep breath, gathering himself. He was still the same Victor, standing tall and looking dignified, but at the same time, something about him looked frail, unhinged, shaken. I stood before him, massaging his shoulders softly.

He immediately took me in his arms, and held as tight as he could, taking a deep breath. Victor has held me so many times, trying to keep me safe or soothe me, but this was different. This was for his sake. He was the one seeking comfort this time, trying to steady himself. It almost felt like he was recharging.

“I’m sorry for this.” Victor finally spoke, sounding more like his usual self.

“No, I’m the one who’s sorry. I really am sorry. I know he’s your father, but he’s an ass. And he has no right to just waltz in and disrespect you.”

Victor let out another sigh.

“Don’t worry, I’m used to it.” He said, looking at me, but not letting me go out of his grip. “I told you, we don’t get along well.”

“You are a good man, Victor. You are.” I said, hoping my words would sound as honest as they were. He gave me a soft kiss, his lips lingering on mine.

“Let’s go home. I had enough of this day.” Victor gathered his things to leave.

The problem with contraptions like a Rube Goldberg machine is that, if you don’t see the bigger picture, you won’t know what it will lead to until the very end. You just see the dominoes falling, and the ball rolling, and the hourglass turning, and the hammer hitting it, allowing the sand in it to be slowly poured into a bowl supported by a very fragile string that can break at any moment.

All I knew was that my study was compromised, my career was in jeopardy, my abuse was out for the world to see, and Victor was fighting with his father. All of this was weighing on me like the sand in the bowl, and I was terrified to find out what would happen should the fragile string break.

Victor and I sat on the sofa in his living room, nursing our glasses of whiskey, both lost in thought. The world had decided to throw its entire weight on our shoulders, and for the first time in a long time, I didn’t feel strong enough to bear it. I couldn’t help but think this was all my fault. It was all a curse I seemed to carry, and I couldn’t get rid of it, no matter how hard I tried. Now it was affecting Victor as well. It broke my heart to see him hurt like that… because of me.

Victor seemed to read my mind, as he held my hand and spoke in a more upbeat tone.

“You know what we need?” He said, getting up and pulling me with him. “A distraction. Let me cook you something.”

I gladly took the suggestion. We gathered around his kitchen island, preparing ingredients, and at some point all those problems seemed so far away that it was almost funny that they existed. We were just there, living in the moment, enjoying the banter, having fun. We would get through this. We had each other.

And then the doorbell rang. With a heavy sigh, Victor went to open it.

“Mia?” I heard him say from the hallway. “What are you doing here?”

It was my turn to sigh heavily. What was she doing here?

I didn’t understand her reply, but I noticed the voices were starting to get closer and closer. I prepared my serene smile.

“Wait in the kitchen with Andrea, I’ll check in my office.” I heard Victor say.

And there she was, wearing a blue summer dress, looking chirpy and innocent as always.

“Oh, Souvenir food?” She eyed the counter, and all the ingredients on it, curiously.

“Not sure it can qualify as Souvenir food, since we are both preparing it.” I said, as I put some onions to fry in a skillet.

“I miss my days cooking with Victor in Souvenir.” She reminisced. “But I have to say I learned a lot, at least now I can make edible food for Gavin. I was helpless in the kitchen, back in the day.”

My heart sank at the thought of Victor and Mia together, sharing the same moments I just shared with him.

“You used to cook with Victor for Souvenir?” I asked, trying to look impassive.

“I was there all the time!” She beamed. “I’m sure Victor told you, we know each other from way back! The restaurant was named after a memory we shared as kids! Well, one of the happy ones, the whole kidnapping and being in captivity for years isn’t one we want to keep, right?”

I held tight to the counter, my mind reeling. First, he clearly opened the restaurant in her honor, and that made my heart pang. Second, what did she mean, kidnapping? And captivity? This time, I couldn’t keep a straight face, and Mia grew worried.

“Are you feeling alright? You look pale, all of a sudden.” I didn’t reply, I could feel the ground moving under my feet. I focused on a spot on the counter, trying to steady myself.

“What’s the matter? Andrea?” I heard Victor’s voice as he came closer, his hands resting on my shoulders. I discretely shrugged his touch away. Mia didn’t notice, but Victor clearly did.

“Mia, the files you asked for are in that envelope. You don’t need me to see you out, do you?” I heard Victor say, his voice tense.

“No, it’s fine. Feel better, Andrea, okay?”

I nodded, wanting to make her go away as soon as possible. After a while, I heard the door close. I wondered how long it would take her to leave the building so I could leave as well, unnoticed. I released my grip from the counter and walked to the living room to get my phone. Victor followed me.

“Can you fill me in on what just happened?” Victor asked, simultaneously confused and annoyed.

“Why did you close Souvenir, Victor?” I faced him, giving him an accusatory look. “And don’t tell me it was because of Mr. Mills, because I know it wasn’t. It was because of her, wasn’t it? It didn’t make sense to keep it open, because she married another guy.”

Victor froze, his expression slightly panicked. I continued my tirade.

“What about your kidnapping? And being held captive for years? My trauma was spread all over Loveland, and you can’t bother sharing yours? I have to learn about it through your ex?”

“She is not my ex! We never had anything! I don’t even understand why you are so obsessed with her, she’s married! She’s off-limits!” Victor exploded.

“Oh, I’m painfully aware of that! If she was single you wouldn’t even look at me. She was nothing to you and still you shared all your life with her, opened a restaurant for her! Yet I sleep in your bed, practically share a life with you, and I’m kept in the dark. I’m the lesser evil. Why would you want me to move here in the first place?” My eyes were filled with tears. Victor’s were filled with anger.

“Don’t make this about me, you know this is not about me.” He fought back. “This is about your unwillingness to commit! This is about you not wanting to stand by my side and fight. I may not be verbal about a lot of things, Andrea, but I do notice them. And the moment that I asked you to move in, you’ve been evasive. You’re terrified to do this. I know that things went sour when you and Daniel moved in, but I’m not Daniel! And it disgusts me to be compared to him! I have been nothing but supportive! And I wonder if you truly want my support, because the minute things get hard, you look for reasons to walk away! Things got hard back in Portugal, and you ran to Loveland! You must be mentally packing by now!”

“Don’t act like you understand what I’ve been through! And don’t you dare use my abuse against me!” I almost screamed. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so enraged with Victor, and I could see him losing it too. And it was all so unfair! I was risking everything I fought so hard for just to be with him.

Victor paused, noticing he was indeed touching a very sensitive subject. He moved closer, but didn’t touch me, using his pleading eyes to connect with me.

“You’re giving up on us, Andrea. Don’t do this because things are getting harder. We can still solve this together.”

“Things are more than hard, Victor. My career is on the line, my trauma is juicy gossip, you haven’t been honest with me about your past. And some things can’t be solved. Did you tell your father the filthy immigrant can’t actually give him grandchildren? Did you ever consider it yourself? That you may want a child someday and I can’t give it to you? Maybe some things are just meant to crash and burn. Maybe we should cut our losses and call it a day.”

I could see the pain in Victor’s eyes when I spoke those last words. It mirrored the pain I felt when I said them. We had different opinions on that matter. As his history with Mia clearly showed, Victor would go to extreme lengths for something that really mattered to him, and I was one to pick my battles. The approaches were different, but both were right. They just weren’t compatible. Maybe Victor genuinely loved me and would stay strong by my side, but I couldn’t bear to make him go through so much hell.

Victor however, headstrong as he was, only saw his side of the equation, the only right side, in his opinion. And I understand he felt rejected. In retrospect, I also understand why the look in his eyes turned from pain to icy cold rage.

“Fine.” He said, his expression defying me, the wall put in place between us. “If you want to leave, then leave. Maybe your infertility is a silver lining, at least you’ll never leave a child behind when things get rough. Abandoning them like you are doing to me right now.”

I didn’t register the seconds that followed his statement, as I acted out of pure rage and instinct. I could only conclude what I had done when I felt my right hand tingle and saw Victor’s face turned to the side, his eyes closed, my fingers printed on his cheek.

I stood for a moment, wondering if it had been just a nightmare. Victor finally opened his eyes and looked at me, and the pain I saw in them was so deep that I couldn’t help but sob in desperation.

I couldn’t believe what had just happened. But it had happened. There was no way we could take it back.

Without a word, I gathered my things, tears streaming down my face, and walked to the door. Victor stood where he was, I didn’t expect him to follow me. Things had gone way too far.

That’s the thing with chain reaction machines, you are so distracted watching the contraption work, that you forget that you can actually stop it. Our relationship had just exploded in the ugliest of ways. The fragile string supporting the bowl had broken, and sand was spilled everywhere.

[mermaidsdrowninginthesea]

Where our Paths met

A naruto love story

A NarutoxOC story because I got inspired to finally, actually write a fanfic of my own and publish it, by a wonderful writer;@bonemarroww. It is going to be here and wattpad, and also Ao3, and in the future, there will be links to Ao3 to read all the chapters that are currently out.

Summary: Akina Seto. A terribly ordinary girl who was at the wrong place at the wrong time. A girl who just wanted have a family to call her own, friends to hang out with. A girl who didn't want to be so ordinary anymore. When she moved to the Village Hidden in the Leaves, she knew that this would be her chance to shine. This would be the place she would meet new people and become someone she was proud of. And maybe she gets help along the way by a hyperactive boy who wants to be recognized for his efforts, and become Hokage someday.

Chapter 1: The first step

The day was clear, with few clouds in the sky. The wind was subtle but not unwanted, moving stray leaves from the trees to the ground, causing them to crunch under Akina's foot as she walked the path laid before her.

    She had been walking for days now, trying to find her way through the geography of the land. Though she had a map, it didn't really help that she didn't understand it at all. But, she knew she was going the right way, the wind was telling her so, in its whispers, telling her to keep going on this path and in a days time she will be in front of the gates of the Hidden Leaf village, her new home. A new beginning, a new start. The thought made Akina smile to herself. She really needed the change of scenery, and even more a change of lifestyle.

  In her old home, there wasn't much, just a small town, a part of the village Hidden in the Mist. The town didn't really have a name, nothing worth mentioning. It wasn't even on any maps, that is how insignificant it was. It's even more irrelevant now since it's been burned and raided and looted a couple months ago. This was the reason why Akina left, and decided to find solace at the Hidden Leaf Village, to make a new life for herself. It definitely helps that she doesn't know who her parents are, and the people of the village were strangely wary of Akina.

   She remembered a vivid memory of the village elders telling her to never interact with anybody, to stay and hide, especially when the new moon comes. She never knew what they meant, and to this day she was still confused on the new moon bit, it always confused her. She did get oddly weak on new moons, but nothing bad would happen. And since nothing bad ever happens, she never really thought of it seriously. But then again, the new moon was out when the village was burned and raided, and Akina couldn't really remember what happened...It's like there was a barrier set on her mind to make her not remember, and it hurt to try.

   Her brows furrowing in frustration, Akina walked on, trying to figure out what happened, but just ending up with a headache. She sighs and relaxing her muscles. The tension of trying to remember becoming too much for her mind. "I probably shouldn't push myself so hard..." Akina muttered to herself, setting her backpack down to grab a drink of water from her canister. With a few swigs down, and a refreshed mindset, she put her backpack back on and started to walk faster down the path, a renewed vigor, wanting to get to the village earlier than in a day.

    Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura, and Kakashi stood in front of the Fourth Hokage. Naruto yawned, Sasuke looking bored, and Sakura glancing from the room to Sasuke to seem inconspicuous, but failing. Kakashi shook his head, then gave his attention to Lord Fourth. "Seeing as you called us here, I'm sure you have a mission for my team and I?" Kakashi asked. Lord Fourth cleared his throat and nodded.   He fumbled for a few seconds to find the right file. When he did find it, he gestured for Kakashi to take it, which he did.

  "This is a simple C rank mission, you four are to meet up and escort a girl around a year or two older than Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura. She is coming from a very small town in the village Hidden in the Mist. Unfortunately, the town was burned down and raided recently, and the only survivor was her." the Fourth explained. Kakashi nodded as he read along the explanation.

   "Understood, we will get ready immediately. Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke, you guys get your things ready and meet me in front of the Konoha gates within two hours." Kakashi commanded the three genin.

   "Why are we leaving so early?!?" Naruto sputtered, "we barely got back from the Land of Waves a week ago! And I haven't even been to Ichiraku's since we've been back!"

"You know, for someone who wants to become Hokage someday, you sure do complain a lot." Kakashi sighed in exasperation.

  "Yeah Naruto, stop complaining so much. Can't you be a little quieter, like some people." Sakura chided in, referring to Sasuke who wasn't paying attention to the conversation.

"Sakura! Why are you taking his side?! You just side you were tired to, ya know!"

   "Yes, but I know when to be responsible and suck it up, unlike you, you idiot!" Sakura jabbed. She huffed and looked in the opposite direction of Naruto to indicate she was done arguing. Naruto slumped his shoulders in defeat and sighed. Kakashi chuckled softly and rubbed the back of his head, bowing politely to the Fourth.

"Sorry about them, they never learn." Kakashi said. The Fourth waved a dismissive hand.

   "No matter, just make sure to get her here safely. And Kakashi, I need to have a word with you privately." the Fourth said, indicating for the genin to leave his office. When they were signaled to leave, all three bowed and turned to leave, quietly closing the door behind them.

    "What did you want to discuss with me?" Kakashi asked curiously. The Fourth Hokage folded his hands underneath his head and settled his chin on top of them and looked at Kakashi with a serious gaze.

    "I know I said this was a C rank mission, but there is more to it than I originally thought. You see, the one requested this mission was the Mizukage herself." Lord Fourth said. This made Kakashi intrigued. "She wouldn't give me a lot of detail as to why she requested us to escort young Akina to our village, but what she did say was that this girl is extremely special for reasons that we don't know, that the Mizukage wouldn't disclose just yet. But if I am assuming correctly, this girl is the last member of a very long and very powerful bloodline, and the Mizukage wants her to be protected at all costs, so we must do our jobs as shinobi of the Leaf to make sure she is not harmed." the Fourth said. Kakashi nodded sharply.

   "If I may ask, what clan could she be from?" Kakashi asked. Lord Fourth hesitated for a few moments, debating on if he should tell Kakashi or not. He looked to his advisers, making eye contact with them. In the end, they all agreed to tell him.

"She might be the last living member of the Seto clan."

  Kakashi gasped, his visible eye practically bulging out of his head. "The Seto clan? I thought they were exterminated more than fifteen years ago."

  The Seto clan. Once revered as gods of the natural elements long ago. It was said that they evolved so much in there ninjutsu that they didn't need to make hand signs, and their taijutsu was on par with the Leaf's own Hyuga clan. And in some branches of the bloodline, their genjutsu was just as terrifying as the Uchiha's genjutsu. They were a force to be reckoned with, and many people were scared of them, as much as they admired them. But with power comes the people who wanted them dead. The clan was soon executed by their own village, in fear they would do something to the people. It was a tragedy many tried to forget.

   "Yes well, rumors were spreading around the land that a woman escaped, and apparently she was pregnant with who you are assigned to meet today. Though she probably doesn't know anything of her heritage and blood, and I want to keep it that way. Don't say anything, not even the your team." the Fourth warned. Kakashi nodded sharply. "Good, you may leave now." the Fourth said, dismissing Kakashi. He bowed lowly and quickly, then in a puff of smoke he was gone. The Fourth Hokage sighed and rubbed eyes, hoping to any god that would listen that they would all be safe on this journey.

    When the two hour time limit came to an end, Kakashi jumped to the front gates of Konoha, and saw his teammates already there, packed and ready to go. He landed next to Naruto and waved in greeting. "I see that you are all ready to go." He said, smiling through his mask.

 "You're five minutes late Kakashi-sensei!" Sakura exclaimed, her hands on her hips.

 "Oh, was I? I didn't notice."

 "Yeah, well we did!" Naruto said, siding with Sakura. She nodded her head in agreement. Kakashi chuckled, not really knowing what to say. Sasuke rolled his eyes and sighs.

 "Do you ever shut up, you dolt?" Sasuke said pointedly to Naruto. Naruto glared right back and cracked his knuckles.

 "What'd you say?!?" Naruto yelled out, winding up his arm to hit Sasuke square in the face, but Kakashi caught his hand before he could.

  "Now now, teammates shouldn't fight each other. Besides we need to get going." Kakashi said. He let go of Naruto's fist and pushed him along so they could finally begin their search for Akina Seto.

  In the first thirty minutes of the journey, it was pretty quiet, with the occasional muttered insult from Naruto towards Sasuke, to which Sasuke ignored. But when thirty minutes became six hours, things started to get a little tense.

  "Sensei! Where are we even going?!" Sakura cried out, tired of all the walking they were doing.

  "Well, we are following the path that leads into Konoha, to see if we run into her while we walk down the same path." Kakashi explained.

 "I understand that, but we've been walking for six hours straight and I haven't seen another living soul at all!" Sakura complained. Kakashi rolled his eyes and sighed. He really didn't want to walk either, but what else were they supposed to do.

  As Kakashi was about to answer, a scream was heard throughout the forest, startling all four the shinobi. "What was that?" Sasuke muttered to himself, carefully taking a kunai out of his pouch.

   "I don't know, but it could be the girl we're looking for!" Naruto yelled out and dashed off the direction of the scream.

  "Wait Naruto, you can't ju-- oh nevermind. Sasuke, Sakura let's go!"

  As Naruto ran through the trees, he came to a sudden halt to see a girl with snow white hair hanging upside down from a tree with a rope. She was also surrounded by three ninja. Their kunai were out, and they were laughing maliciously. Before Naruto had a chance to consider going down there to help the girl, there was hand holding him in place. He looked over to see it was Kakashi, with Sasuke and Sakura following quietly behind. Naruto whispered to Kakashi, "Who are they?"

 "Rogue ninja it seems." Kakashi responded back quietly. "Okay, on my command, we'll all go in and surprise them. Knock them out and then get to the girl." Kakashi whispered. Naruto nodded, along with Sasuke and Sakura. He nodded and gestured for them to move out.

 Naruto quickly jumped out with a kunai in hand, and promptly kicked one of the ninja in the face causing his head to move in an unnatural way, and instantly knocking him out. Kakashi made quick hits to the second ninja, stabbing all his vitals points and also instantly knocking him out. Sakura and Sasuke made quick work of the last rogue, them both hitting him in the face on either side, at the same time, knocking him out too. "Well, that was fast." Naruto laughed out.

 "Yeah, for rogue ninja, they weren't that strong. They didn't even sense us." Sasuke said, putting his kunai back in his pouch.

  "You guys have a point. They were pretty compared to most ninja that go rogue. I wonder..." Kakashi concurred, trailing off into his own thoughts. The genin seemed to do the same, perplexed as to how they won so easily like that.

 "Uhm, not to interrupt your brainstorming, but do you think you could help me get down from here?" Akina said from her position upside down. Naruto heard her first and gasped loudly.

  "Oh right! Sorry about that!" Naruto threw his kunai at the rope, successfully cutting it, causing Akina to fall. Naruto made sure to catch her, then slowly drop her to the ground. Akina patted her clothes down for any dust and rubbed her hair down, making it less of a mess than it was when she was upside down. Naruto looked at her more closely. She was really pale, her eyes a deep blue, but yet red at the same time. Her eyelashes and eyebrows were also white. Everything about her screamed fragility. She seemed like the personification of snow. Yet, Naruto got the feeling she was strong, very strong. Maybe it was the way she held herself, or the gaze in her eyes when she met Naruto's.

 She smiled and bowed, then bowed to the other three. "Thank you all for helping me, I was quite in a bind there." Akina said politely. Naruto chuckled and put his hand behind his head in a casual pose.

  "Aww, no problem, what are ninja for!" Naruto said confidently.

 "Yes, Naruto is quite right here. But, are you by any chance Akina Seto?" Kakashi asked. Akina blinked up at him and nodded suspiciously. Kakashi's eye crinkled, signaling his smile from under the mask, and held out his hand to her. "Oh good. My name is Kakashi," she shook his hand," and this is my team, Sasuke," Akina shook Sasuke's hand,"Sakura," she then shook Sakura's hand, "and Naruto here, who cut you down from the tree." Kakashi finished as Akina shook Naruto's hand.

  "That's right, Naruto Uzumaki! Amazing ninja and future Hokage!" Naruto said loudly, a big grin on his face. Akina couldn't help but smile back at him.

  "Well, it's nice to meet all of you. My name is Akina Seto, wandering traveler, trying to find her way to Konoha." she said to them.

 "Yes, we were actually asked to meet you and escort you the rest of the way to Konoha." Kakashi said to her. "Now that we have found you, let us lead the way to your new home."

  "Thank you very much." Akina said gratefully. She looked around and quickly found her backpack behind a tree. Putting it on, she looked to the group and smiled, indicating she was ready to leave when they were.

  They set out again, going back Konoha this time. As they walked, Akina felt eyes on her and looked to her left to see Naruto stealing glances at her every once in awhile. She seem confused, was there something on her face? No, she didn't think so. Maybe something else...But, oh well. She smiled when she met eye contact with him. Naruto blushed a little in embarrassment at being caught. To distract himself, he started to talk with Sakura. Akina watched them interact, interested in how this blonde boy acted. He was pretty rambunctious for how small he was. She smiled to herself. She hoped when she got to Konoha, everybody acted like this. Loud and open. This would be her first step to a bigger, better life.

Author’s notes: I hope it wasn’t too bad, I really really tried on this. Also for my oc, you can totally replace her with yourself lol.

EDIT: A LOVELY PERSON TOLD ME HOW TO DO AO3 SO IT WILL BE ON AO3 TOO.