#This might be hard to relate to if you don't know people like this
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🔎Scam Exam(ination)🔍(updated x/x/xx)
Seen as: Selling HRT / Testosterone Scam Type: Fake Product / Fraud
Platform: Tumblr
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This scam mostly targets LGBTQ+ individuals, mainly Trans folk who post in such related tags.
Those who do may receive a DM, comment, ask, or any such related contact from another tumblr user who claims to be a certified™ Doctor, Therapist, Pharmacist, ect, who is trying to offer you a 'new and amazing' drug that's not on the market, or a 'cheap alternative medicine' to name brand HRT or Testosterone.
One such account that popped up recently of this is drfelixortega.
Here is what their tumblr page looks like:
And this is the ask that they are sending users:
(Screenshot taken from this post.)
If you visit their page, you will only find six posts.
All very generic in nature.
None of which link to any sort of certification or credentials that prove that this person is a 'real' doctor. They just say they are a totally real (no fake) Doctor and expect people to go with it.
Like most scammers usually to do.
Here's another version of where another HRT scammer leaves comments on peoples posts:
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Why this is a scam:
1 - The risk.
Purchasing any sort of drug online from a shady dealer is not only a good way to get scammed, it's a good way to get sick and possibly even die. You have no idea what sort of ingredients are in the pills these supposed Doctors online are trying to sell you.
There was a story that surfaced on my local news station that talked about how in South Korea, capsules were seized that contained the contents of herbs and a mixture of human flesh/DNA.
When tested, the human material was found to belong to infants.
If you wish to read more, you can find the 2015 article here. But be warned, it is very graphic. (No pictures)
2 - The scam.
I know that getting HRT or even Testosterone can be hard, and I know how the struggle and the desire to truly be yourself can become overwhelming. Your insurance may not pay for it, or you might not even have insurance to begin with, leaving without hope at all in your journey to begin transitioning.
But that still doesn't mean you should believe every offer that seems too good to be true the moment you're offered it online.
Think about these things for a second:
Why would a doctor, surgeon, pharmacist, what have you, be on Tumblr of all places? Why would they browse the trans tag, or other such related tags, to find potential 'clients?' Don't you usually have to make an appointment with a doctor? For your insurance to then pay for to cover your medicine? How can a board certified pharmacist.. be a gender assessment surgeon at the same time? (it's a lie, that's why.)
3 - The truth.
The truth of the matter is, you cannot, unfortunately, get HRT or Testosterone without a Prescription.
And buying it online from any sort of 3rd party website or manufacturer is simply putting not only your wallet at risk, but your life at risk.
Here is a screenshot taken from this GoodRX article:
Here is an article on the risks and dangers of buying unregulated / unlicensed HRT. One big one being that they can be contaminated.
And a final, general consensus from google:
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Final Thoughts:
As I've said in a few of my past scam Exam(inations), if something seems too good to be true, it most likely is. I know how life changing something can be and how desperate wanting it can make you, but please don't risk your wallet, or your life, for it.
Remember: These are just words these people offer you.
Ask for proof. If they send you any kind of images, remember, you can reverse image search them to try and find the source. If you get pushy in asking for their credentials they'll probably end up blocking you and just want you to 'trust them' or send you clearly edited photoshops.
Never give them your personal information or credit card information.
And never go to a strange website you don't know or have never heard of without googling it first.
You can also run it through something like VirusTotal to check if any of the big/main websites like Bitdefender or Kaspersky that detect things like phishing, viruses/trojans/maware, and all that fun stuff, have picked up on it being malicious.
Just... Be safe.
Please make sure you think before you talk to people like this.
Take care everyone. <3
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Disclaimer: Tags are relevant to the content of this post. This is not 'tag spam' or 'unrelated'. I'm just spreading awareness about this scam targeting people taking hormone drugs like HRT which also includes people other than just trans folk. :)
#scam#scams#scam alert#scammer#scammers#scam awareness#HRT scam#hrt#transition#top surgery#transman#ftm#estrogen#hormones#LGBT#transgender#trans#testosterone#mtf#transwoman#queer#LGBTQIA#nonbinary#genderfluid#trans nonbinary#enby#drfelixortega
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Opened my copy of Another Note: The Los Angeles BB Murder Cases for the first time in a decade and man, I forgot this is a goldmine of info and Mello characterization. It lets us know what kind of person Mello is almost more than the source material. Every time he's on panel/screen he's always so intense, it's fascinating to see him write and kind of get this feeling of "oh, he is also a normal guy outside of those situations".
He says he had one extensive in-person meeting with L, which is backed up by this other post of mine where I point out that, in the anime at least, Mello references having spoken to L personally. If we take it as canon it means L and Mello met at some point between Kira emerging and L leaving England for Japan.
He expresses a strong sense he might die. I've seen people say that he's "narrating from beyond (heh) the grave" and it's nonsensical, but that's not what's happening here. He's just writing while anticipating his death and writing as if these notes may be discovered posthumously.
He thinks that, in the event he dies, Near is the one who will discover his writings. This is interesting to me because it suggests Mello either knows Near knows his whereabouts, or would figure it out and recover his belongings. I actually think this is outright supported by canon - we see Near eating Mello's chocolate in the manga's epilogue. I don't think he instructed his staff to go out and buy that same chocolate, I think that's straight up Mello's stash.
At some point he started identifying less with the "Mello" alias and calling himself Mihael.
He's so sentimental... ending the prologue simply with "Good memories and nightmares". Bro.
"Imagine you were going to kill someone. What do you think would be the most difficult part? .... The correct answer: killing someone." Damn, I love you Mello lol. Also fascinating when you remember that he achieved his status in the mafia by beheading someone. Yes, he would know how hard it is to kill a person.
Mello states that he and Near belong to the "fourth generation" of Wammy's House kids.
He expresses open sympathy for Beyond and his state, twice... based on his own narration and how he portrays B in the course of the story, he definitely relates to B's emotions.
"Perhaps these gods actually wanted a blood soaked world of betrayal and false accusation. Perhaps the entire episode exists as a lesson to teach us the difference between the Almighty and the shinigami." I can't entirely make sense of this, and I don't want to get ahead of myself, but is "Almighty" capitalized here to definitely refer to the divine? Like, the Christian God but in a bit of a sidestepped, roundabout way? Wish I could see the original Japanese text for this line. If anyone has essays/posts about it, please show me.
And on a meta-textual level, the ambiguity of our role/perspective as the reader of these notes is also interesting. We're probably just an omniscient, unmoored observer being told about this set of notes Mello wrote and his line to the effect of "if it happens to turn into [a book]" is tongue-in-cheek. I know there's a slight, hanging implication that Near did in fact publish his notes, but I think that's unlikely since they contain so much sensitive/classified information.
#death note#mello#mihael keehl#i tried to write in his voice/style ten years ago and that fic is still up but that fic is a failure imo#i could probably do it better now but i don't have a specific story idea worth pursuing#we need more books written by mello's hand since he said he had more stories he wanted to write#get on it O&O hire a writer to make another one go go go chop chop#meta
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long time no see…
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Hey, hi, hello~
I don't know if anyone is still around this little blog o' mine or if I'm just showing up suddenly on the dash and whoever is seeing this might not recall ever even following me lol.
But – if you remember me or not – I'm just dropping by to say that I've missed you and that I truly hope you're doing well 🫂💗
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I...have not been doing so well. But I've been working on it.
In a way, it's been healing to reshape my approach to things like journaling and capturing photos. I've been taking the time to develop a practice in documenting daily life ��� the people I care about, the places we visit, and all the random little moments in between – with more intentionality and care than I have in the recent past.
(tw: grief and loss/death under cut)
We lost my mother very suddenly last November – and things have been unbearably hard the last few months.
In a lot of ways, 2024 was one of the best years: my partner and I traveled to Japan for the first time ever, my family had a small reunion in our hometown to watch the total solar eclipse together, my best friends got married, and we went on so many amazing trips and had the type of outings that made me so inspired, optimistic, and excited about life and the future.
But in so many other ways, it was also one of the worst years I've had in a long time: starting with a hard-learned (but perhaps overdue) firsthand lesson and reminder on how scary and mean the internet can be, followed by losing both my grandfather in the spring and then my mother just before the winter holidays.
I'm not particularly good when it comes to emotions– forget about even processing grief or putting into any sort of meaningful words how it all feels. But I guess all of this has made me shift my mindset when it comes to wanting to just...remember. To not forget.
✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦
On documenting life through journaling...
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I had always journaled in some way or another all my life, but I only really started considering it a serious practice and hobby sometime around 2020. But I had lost my way with it in recent years, treating it solely as some kind of aesthetic-only venture, and only dedicating the time if I knew that I could make it "pretty" and "palatable for sharing".
And so, many entries were missed; days and weeks lost to fuzzy recollection, months bled into each other, and little moments only existed as vague and passing snapshots on my phone gallery (if I even remembered to take a photo).
But I now wish I had just written it down; whatever it was – big, small, angry, funny, sad, happy – just wrote it all down. It didn't have to be an aesthetically collaged spread or artful doodle or drawing. I wish I had documented some of the last times I had seen or spoken with my mother; what she had said, did, or how she reacted to silly news or quips I told her. I barely remember anything even just from the last year.
So now I write it all down, day after day: I'll write what's on my mind, what we did before, what I'm doing currently, what I'm planning to do. If someone calls or my partner walks in to my studio while I'm working and tells me something that has me reacting in the moment I'll jot down a little "omg!!" or "lol" or "holy shit" next to whatever they said or did.
If I get little scraps from the day – receipts, tags, tickets, wrappers – I'll paste it in wherever it happens to fit in my journal, with a little note of the date or what the outing was. And every so often, I'll print out photos to paste in with notes relating back to past entries or junk journal spreads.
Is always pretty? No, but it's pretty in its chaos. Is it always even chronological? Not at all. Does it always make sense? Not really. But I love every page so, so much more than anything I had carefully curated before in my previous journals.
✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦
On documenting life through photos...
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I had once carried a camera with me everywhere before phone cameras became decent enough that I didn't feel the need to have a dedicated tool for just taking pictures anymore.
It wasn't until we were all looking through our collective family photos to use for my mother's memorial service and headstone that it hit me that I just don't take as many pictures as I used to– and when I did, they just don't compare to the ones that I used to take years ago when I did carry a camera with me on every outing and trip.
We ended up choosing a photo of her that I had taken on my once-beloved dSLR camera I used to haul around with me almost 10 years ago; she was smiling, strong, radiant, beautiful– and it was just a random moment I took my camera out in a Taiwan salon while she was waiting as my sister and I were both getting our hair done for our cousin's wedding.
A bit indescribable – and not even something I realized was missing – but there's something about having an actual camera on hand that pushes me to take more photos, and somehow better and more mindful photos at that.
And so I made the decision to invest in a new camera. An absolute necessity to take photos? No, of course not; I do still have my phone camera after all. But they say (apparently) that "the best camera is the one that you actually use"– and I was most definitely not using my phone as much as I could have been.
This new camera though? Only time will truly tell, but the past has shown that I've worked better with a dedicated camera on hand and already I can't begin to explain the difference it's made in the last week alone since I picked up the habit of carrying a camera around with me again.
✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦
This was a crazy long post that sort of got away from me. Not sure where I want to go from here – I guess I just want to say that if you ever felt called to document your life in some way, it's never too late to start; you'll only wish that you had begun sooner.
If you're still here– I love you. I hope you're taking care of yourself.
And thank you for reading along with my incredibly longwinded life update of what was essentially just "I'm grieving so I started journaling more and also bought a camera" lol.
💗
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a/n: A bit of a long post, but I thought I'd share some character notes I have of Sukuna from my au 'Cross My Heart'. I don't foresee myself writing anything that is related to Sukuna's past before him meeting reader, which is why I thought it would be nice to release some notes just to give him some more depth. This will have some little fun facts about Jin as well since they're twins. As you might be able to tell, I'm a bit invested in this au right now. But I am trying to work on my other fics, so you might not see anything else come out for CMH this upcoming week. x
tw: 18+ mdni, suggestive themes, mature themes, complicated family dynamics, death
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cmh!sukuna - growing up & teen years
Their mother has always been out of the picture so it was just Wasuke, Jin, and Sukuna. Wasuke never mentioned much about their mother, it always seemed to be a sore topic. All they know is she's no longer alive.
Sukuna had always been kind of troubled as a kid and well into his teens. Finance has been tight growing up, so Jin and Sukuna had to work odd jobs since they were 13 until they were of legal working age, which then they would be on an actual payroll working minimum wage jobs.
Uraume knew both Jin and Sukuna since elementary school, but they have always been a little closer with Sukuna. They didn't attend the same high school as they attended another school in a different district, but they were still in contact with Sukuna.
In high school, Jin was the nerd, and Sukuna was just an edgelord that all the girls found very mysterious and alluring. Sukuna's height skyrocketed during this time as well, so he just naturally stood out. He was popular not because he aspired or tried to be - it just happened.
Given his physique, some teachers would also try to recruit him into sport teams, but Sukuna said no, because he had to work part-time after school.
Jin and Sukuna never talked to each other much. Even though they were in the same high school. People didn't even realize they were related because of how different they looked, until graduation when some students saw them taking pictures together with Wasuke.
Sukuna looks a lot like Wasuke, and Jin looks a lot like their mother.
There was a bit of resentment between the two brothers growing up, because Sukuna thought Jin was spineless, whereas Jin thought Sukuna was selfish.
To be honest, both Sukuna and Jin had a difficult time expressing their thoughts and feelings because Wasuke was pretty harsh on the boys growing up, but he also had a lot on his plate as a single father. Given Wasuke's curt nature, he didn't really know how to nurture children and did only what he thought was right.
Sukuna was easily agitated and explosive, versus Jin who bottled everything up and could be a bit reclused when things got too overwhelming.
Kaori and Jin were high school sweethearts. They met in the debate club during Jin's sophomore year. Kaori is one year older than Jin. Jin was not the argumentative type, but he decided to step out of his comfort zone, and try something new. Seeing how Jin is now, it's hard to believe he was incredibly shy in high school. Kaori had a lot to do with him being more expressive with his feelings and really getting him out of his shell.
cmh!sukuna - college days
Left home shortly after high school graduation. He got into a huge fight with Wasuke, because Sukuna wanted to go into trades instead of university. Jin was accepted into a prestigious ivy league university on full scholarship.
Wasuke had found Sukuna's acceptance letter to the same university in the bin, after Sukuna lied and said he didn't get accepted. Wasuke went into an explosive fit - he couldn't understand why his son was settling for 'less' and told him with that mentality he will amount to nothing.
Though Sukuna left home at 18 and seemingly hated his brother, he never changed his telephone number just in case one day Jin needed him.
College was when Sukuna really began to let loose and felt the full experience of freedom.
Lost his virginity to some random TA in his college, he couldn't even remember her name or face, until she approached him one day out of the blue and thought she was pregnant. They went to a health clinic and it turned out to be a false alarm. The TA wanted to continue the relationship on the down-low, but Sukuna dropped it.
Sukuna met Yorozu during his first year of college. Her band was prepping for a college event - they did a cover of ‘Smile Like You Mean It’ by The Killers, which initially piqued Sukuna’s interest
Yorozu and Sukuna hit it off quite well, it had a lot to do with their approach to life, and to be honest they were both kind of troubled at the time.
Toji and Shiu came into the picture shortly after, they met Yorozu during an elective course they all shared, and somehow the four of them all came together as a group even though they were from vastly different fields of studies. Toji and Shiu have known each other for a long time.
Yorozu's area of study - music (4 year), Shiu's area of study - international business (4 year), Toji's area of study - exercise science (3 year), Sukuna's area of study - automotive technician (apprenticeship program, 2 years)
cmh!sukuna - 20's, up to when he went to jail
When Sukuna was 21, he received a phone call from Jin. Wasuke passed away very abruptly. He came home from work one night and said that he had a headache, went to bed early and never woke up.
After going through Wasuke's stuff, they accidentally broke one of Wasuke's picture frames. The framed photo was from their high school graduation. Sukuna never saw the photo before, but Wasuke wore a big smile, one that Sukuna had never seen growing up. And when he looked closely, he could see that his father's gaze was actually on him in that photo.
On the back of the photo, Wasuke wrote a note to his late wife. "They grew up well. I tried my best though it would have been better if you were around, but they still managed to pave a path for themselves despite my shortcomings as their father. Jin is very much like you, while Ryomen reminds me much of myself. They are truly both our children. I am proud of them. I miss you, but the three of us are doing fine."
That revelation with the photo really fucked Sukuna up. That's when he also patched things up with Jin.
Jin graduated at 22 from an ivy league business school, and had this ambition of becoming an entrepreneur. At this point, Sukuna had already been working as a full-time mechanic for two years. Jin approached Sukuna with the idea and that's when they kickstarted their garage business.
The first year was quite difficult, but then afterwards it started picking up, eventually by their fifth year, business was booming. Jin was able to get married to Kaori, and bought a house to start their family. Sukuna bought two condos, and continued living his life of work hard, play hard, and just enjoying a commitment-free life.
Patching up his relationship with Jin and starting a business really saved Sukuna's life - and that's why he has so much respect for Jin and the business. It definitely curbed down his edginess and he felt less troubled, but he's far from a saint and knows there's still a lot he needs to work on.
A few months later, the altercation with the bad business deal happened and Sukuna went to jail for two and a half years.
Toji, Shiu, and Yorozu would occasionally visit him in jail
Jin and Kaori would visit Sukuna too, but Sukuna was the one to tell Jin and Kaori not to visit when they found out she was pregnant. "Don't worry about me, take care of the kid. I don't want a pregnant woman coming in and out of jail like that. I'll see you both and the kid when I'm out."
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Writing © xechu - please do not redistribute, translate, or repost any of my works.
#sukuna x reader#sukuna x you#sukuna x y/n#ryomen sukuna x reader#jjk fanfic#jjk x reader#jjk x you#sukuna headcanons#jjk headcanons#jujutsu kaisen fanfic
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Hiya River! 👋☺️🌻 Just wanna say thanks for seriously answering about my 'tsundere' astrology ask instead of dismissing it offhand! Some of the mentioned placements funnily enough do fit with the person I had in mind! 😂 Maybe it's just me, but I like being one of the few who can "crack the (tsundere) code" when it comes to intuiting a loved one's inner reactions. Especially, when they're already so solitary or tend to adopt a popular or professional mask around others. 🤭 Guess I don't mind a romantic challenge, but I also just like that feeling of being "special enough" to have earned that person's trust & love after proving I'm NOT playing around with their feelings, if that makes sense? I also admit to sometimes like figuring out people who are a bit of a mystery~! 🕵️ IDK how to phrase my question exactly, but do you think there's any astrology placements related to folks who don't mind a romantic "challenge" aka. get easily drawn to partners who act exclusive, coy, or play hard to get? I know everybody has their own unique motives for liking such partners (some healthy, some not so much... ☠️), but I was just curious! 🤭 Sorry if my question is too confusingly worded to answer but thanks for reading this anyways! 🫶 - From 🔥 & 🧊
Hello 🔥 & 🧊, I think regardless of astrological placements, the majority of people tends to like a bit of a challenge in romance. 👀
Placements that get drawn to romantic challenges
Strong Mars influence: The desire to conquer, loving the chase. They are brave and direct, won't get discouraged by a challenge (likely get turned on by it). But they can be impatient so if the challenge goes on for too long, they will lose interest. (Notable placements: Mars-Moon aspect: emotional resilience, Mars-Sun: confidence, Mars-Mercury: curiosity, Mars-Saturn: patience, Mars-Pluto: desire to conquer and uncover mysteries, Mars in 5H or 7H: love the chase of romance, like to pursue)
Strong Saturn influence: They like to "work" for the affection of the other person. A pursuit too easy, too comfortable can make them suspicious of the "quality" (a false suspicion sometimes). A love/ a person worth pursuing is someone of high values, and a "hard to get" person can seem like that to them (again, not always the case). A fruit tastes sweeter when you work hard to get it from the high branch.
Strong Pluto influence: They're drawn to mysteries, to uncover the true essence of someone behind their mask. The more they sense that someone is hiding something, the more curious they're about that person. It won't guarantee that once they have gotten to the core of the other person, they will stay though. They're likely to act coy, hard to get themselves, they understand the game so well, they're not going to let anyone beat them in it, it can be a hit-or-miss, they can be either turned on or off by the challenge.
Strong Neptune influence: While they may not actively do the chasing, they like to do the attracting once they sense that they can charm a hard to get person. The idea of being the one, being special in someone's eyes can be attractive. They want to be the one who can touch the softer part of the other person. Saturn and Neptune influence, or a strong Moon, can have the similar effect of wanting to "fix" the other person.
Personal planets in Cardinal signs (Aries, Cancer, Libra, Capricorn): They like to initiate, go after what they want (not that the other signs don't go after what they want, but their way is more about attracting, passive energy), they usually have strong will so they're likely to not be deterred from romantic challenges.
Afflicted Sun/Moon/Venus: Some can have low self-confidence, self-esteem or are mistrustful in love that they think love should be hard to get. A tumultuous, difficult love or a difficult partner might appeal more to them than a peaceful, easy one.
#astro observations#astrology aspects#astrology placements#astro notes#astro posts#astro community#astroblr#natal chart#birth chart#ask me questions#astrology asks
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okay. one more thing. this is the one that people really might not like. because I love jayce. I have written over 100 thousand words of fic with jayce at the center. but I honestly can understand where people who watched only season 1 and don't like jayce are coming from?
because we have to remember... Jayce's arc represents a lot of... real world issues and experiences. so much so I could write a whole like 20 page essay on it. I know people know this but also it may be a good reminder that like:
no, I don't think people "aren't watching the show properly" if they don't love the character that manufactures weapons to use against an oppressed population, no matter the "intention" he had.
additionally, i think jayce in season 1 represents something a lot of people have been through in terms of people you are in close relationships with having this sort of conditional allyship with you and your people?
that bridge scene hits.... really really hard if you've been in Viktor's shoes. and I can see why people may not want to "stan" considering. Even if he apologized right after. Even if his heart is in the right place. even the way it is shot is very clearly supposed to represent a massive imbalance of power.
anyways. i find it a disservice to the narrative and its themes and a disservice to the character to diminish this stuff.
when you have a character with an arc related to growth, and then try to pretend he didn't really grow from much in the first place, that sucks the life and energy out of a really powerful arc. (which is one of the only things I thought was done well in season 2! so I find it very gahhh!)
ok now im done i promise
(also because i feel the ice cream truck falling on my head as I post this, I am not saying that the extreme jayce hate was warranted. I'm just saying that I understand why an audience member may be weary of him in season 1 and I don't think its media illiteracy for someone not to fully enjoy him)
spicy take of the week but i feel like the arcane fandom has really overcorrected with the jayce hate to the point where they've flattened him into someone who does no wrong/ has only done wrong because he's like 'too nice' or 'too good' or whatever. i feel like it really flattens his character and takes away from how much he grew to act like he didn't do some really fucked up shit in season 1
#like we can talk so much about his intentions#another reason i find him so JUICY as a character#but i feel we're forgetting intentions dont make things like#ok#DSFLKHDJ?!?#idk. i just love jayce. sometimes i feel like nobody sees him!#like think about it narratively and the role he was supposed to serve in it
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currently repeating "you are under no obligation to be good at the things you do for fun" to myself over and over
#this is in relation to dnd lol#i was trying out a new group and the dm seemed nice enough#and ive been interested in playing bards for a while so i said i might play one#and he went hard on ''oh you're the face you're the face'' and im like what if i just like the concept and don't want to be the face#is that ok my guy#and then i got scared out of playing a bard because im like oh well sometimes i just dont know what to say in a situation#and i just listen to other people talk so clearly i cant play a bard#but i was watching a dnd youtuber and she was talking about shy roleplayers and she gave some good advice but also ultimately said#you're under no obligation to be good at what you do for fun#and honestly? so true#anyway im not playing in that campaign because i think that while the guy was nice#his expectations were like. critical role levels and its like buddy im just here for a good time im not entertaining the masses lol#im having a hard enough time not beating myself up over my regular campaign all the time for no good reason lol lets not add onto it#lol anyway today i made myself a little eladrin bard who loves painting with her magic paint brush#and she sits next to my changeling warlock as characters i will play eventually#personal
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which subtle way of saying 'i love you' are you?
doing things for them without being asked to.
you're observant and you know your loved ones so well, you know when to do things for them without having to ask (or be asked) what they need. they don't always know how much you do for them; there's no need pointing it out, you're just happy to help.
you do things simply to make others feel better and lighten their burdens, and expect nothing in return: their happiness is enough for you, even if they don't always know you're the one who caused it. still, as good as it might feel to give and give and keep on giving, please allow them to do things for you in return.
people feel better when they're being helpful (you should know this, more than anyone) and no matter how hard it might feel for you to accept help from someone, you should take it when they readily give it to you. you deserve to be loved in the way you love them, too. you won't be a burden -- and remember: a real friend will love you even when you're not constantly being useful, because your company is more than enough.
stolen from: @raisedcold (thank you for introducing me to this <33)
tagging: @question-marked, @twcfaces, @adamanteine, @markhit, and anyone else who might like to complete this quiz!
#OF MONSTERS AND MEN: musings.#ooc post.#rp memes.#oh... oh so i see uquiz is still breaking hearts to this day huh JSJSJ 😭 nooo but the parts where it said 'no matter how hard it might feel#to accept help from someone you should take it' & 'their happiness is enough for you even if they don't always know you're the one who#caused it' are just. They're SO true in relation to barton because let me tell y'all i'm not trying to claim that he is a good person and#will never do so because that would just be a lie but i feel as if there are times where barton actually does show some humanity + does#things for people that he doesn't have to especially for people like his family or those he cares about in general buttt...#he doesn't like to accept help from other's so it's like GAHHH just stop doing this to yourself man and let other people care about you#in return even though this man feels this need for punishment sometimes in regards to the bad thing's he's done which. yeah there is a#lengthy list of but he loved marceline & he triesss to love his kids but god damn is this guy REALLY not good at it sometimes#either unintentionally or intentionally but yeah. he does try whenever he can so although that doesn't excuse his behavior...#that does say something about him
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I cared. I still do. I still think of you and I still cry over you. You were importat to me. You still are.
#I was interested. I wanted to get to know you.#I did not want validation. I only said it because you said it... I don't know why. I was susceptible.#I was blindly accepting certain things that you said about me. Judgement that you had for me.#I was under severe stress from my job at the time; while at the same time dealing with unresolved emotional trauma and very low self worth.#vent#I was burnt out. Crushed... Completely.#I didn't want attention. I did not want you to cure my depression. I though I was just letting you know me. I wasn't aware I was oversharin#I tried... SO HARD to get over the things that triggered me and hurt me but I just couldn't...#I wanted to. I did everything in my might; I took it to therapy; I looked everywhere within me; to either get over it#or completely forget about you and stop caring at all; so things were ok and normal again; but it didn't go away...#I just feel so... unsafe... at the idea of talking again#I know I wasn't the best listener and I profoundly regret that.#I was not only thinking about myself like you said and I was aware of the effort that other's put; but I was afraid/resistant to PRECISELY#that cause of past events with other people. Because in some I was the one putting that effort and ended badly for me. Looking back#that was inappropiate of you because you felt too comfortable generalizing my past relationships and why in your head they failed.#“I cant help but feel you are looking down on people who” Stay away from me if you ever make a stretch like this again.#By “experiment” I meant that you don't know how a relatioship with somebody is gonna turn out until you go and try. That's all I meant.#I didn't want things to turn out this way. I'm sorry they did.#The effort I put for you may have been shit to you. But to me it was a lot. And I'm done taking judgement.#Altho I love my friends I still keep distance. I still can't completely help that. I can go months not talking to my BF.#You were my BF during my teenage years. I remembered you fondly. I still do.#I don't feel ready to talk again having to keep to myself interest that I might have. Related to trauma. I do not feel comfortable with tha#No I do not look at your blogs.#The day I said I was abused I had a panic attack right after that. That's mainly why I had to cut contact: I didn't want another one.#I didn't tell you because I didn't trust you to not say “talk to the void” again. I didn't trust you to want to hear about it. I didnt feel#safe with you anymore. Event tho we ressumed contact I felt that way the entire time.#I wanted to answer all the questions you had; I really did; until I couldn't stand it anymore.#And the day I removed you from discord... I know you probably had an awful day that day... I'm so; so sorry...#I'd like to one day be completely unbothered by assumptions and stuff cuz I know it's not your fault... You went through stuff too...#stuff
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finding out that kaito and shinichi have been revealed to be cousins is like finding out there was a huge earthquake in the country you used to live in
#which also just happened. these experiences are roughly equivalent. snmcmdmcmdllc#detective conan#laughs awkwardly#LIKE. idk how to put into words. detective conan's fandom is.... something#these are people who have been invested in the (often romantic) trials and tribulations of a 17 year old who looks 7 years old#for upwards of 20 or 30 years. this is not a casual reveal#detective conan is not some labor of love and artistry that the author has a specific vision for. it's the longest cash grab that never end#it has had movies during golden week every year for longer than i have been alive and distributes it in several countries#and kaito/shinichi is very popular. i think if you know anything about manga/anime fandoms i don't even need to explain why#for the author to publicly canonically rip up one of the most popular ships of the series... it's hard to imagine that it wasn't deliberate#it's not just a matter of 'omg just ship what you like ignore canon'. they HAVE been doing that (conan has a canon female love interest)#this is very destiel-coded in the sense that it feels simultaneously like the author acknowledging that section of the fandom#while doing the worst possible thing about it. like NO ONE wanted that dnvkdmlvmdk#except for me. this is so funny. I've ALWAYS HAD SUSPICIONS OKAY#kaito and shinichi's canonized same-face syndrome might have started as a meta joke. but remember. this is one of those series#where people are frequently revealed to be a.) not dead all along and b.) secretly someone else all along and#c.) secretly related to someone plot-important all along. all these have happened MANY times#when you have a franchise that has run for this long you kind of have no choice but to up the stakes to the point of absurdity#so basically. it feels like walking in with pizza to the burning room meme except the author was the one to set the fire
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Something weirdly specific for at least some of us, that we've had in mind for awhile; unfortunately this was the closest we could get with a picrew tbh.
× × × || × × × || × × ×
Like, fortunately for us; while we have some things that irk us with this one, but this hits pretty close in a metaphorical sense at least for the people we're thinking of. Unfortunately for us, some of those are more obvious than others so we hesitated on weather we needed to share this or not LOL.
#stimboard#cn // highly personal#highly personal#GOD THAT PINK IN THE BACKGROUND. SO THREATENING.#THAT “SHE KNOWS” THING A MONTH BACK IN THE GAME SESSION. // OC-related tangent in the tags incoming#(<- hits differently in some situations)#(<- *stares at the plural OCs who we made an entire past for.*)#(<- *stares at the fact their whole thing is. dysphoria made them plural. and THEN they became functionally immortal.*)#(<- you don't skip town for no reason. they lived in a generation where being both would throw them in The Loony Bin)#(<- but only the QUEERNESS became more acceptable later on.)#(<- these bozos are a mirror to our own life and frustration. and that realistically. people are starting to accept endogenics to a degree.#(<- but the world we want and how endos are treated is NOT going to happen next yer. it MIGHT happen in like 20 years.)#(<- “she knows” has been and always will be our greatest fear and pushing through that is HARD.)#(<- So what would it look like INSTEAD to be hiding under queerness. which is still stigmatized as hell)#(<- but you can AT LEAST find a margin of community somewhere that isn't full of abusers and bootlickers/idenity-medicalists for that ID)#NONE OF THIS IS NEGATIVE we're actually kind of glad the GM saw the full implications of that even implicitly -#- getting the shivers just remembering that. But also it's interesting to implement that onto their younger singletsona lmao.#WERE SO PISSED THO THAT WE COULDNT FIND A GREYSCALE MASK THAT WASNT. HORROR OR PARTY. THESE FUCKERS ARE NOT VILLAINS YNKOW.#like how the fuck do we have a hoard of gifs in our tumblr likes and found NOTHING for that specifically lolsob?#yes these ARE the same two chucklefucks we blabbed on and on about for like a week on our main account.#but its their “singletsona”. kind of. kind of sort of. we have wholeass ideas on this narratively.#like we just need to WRITE as in actually write but the issue is every time we do we hit A Wall(tm)#but yeah. anyways. we have headmates playing a TTRPG and we may have projected our frustrations onto two OCs that we don't even play. 😭😭😭
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i wanna write my season 4 fic but i don't wanna retread canon scenes because i just think that's boring (possibly more to me as a writer than to readers, idk, i haven't thought about it that deeply) but because of its nature as a limited canon rewrite and some of the components being changed certain scenes NEED to be retreaded but i'm still like if i don't care will anyone else??? also it's just not as fun playing with scenes that have basically already happened because the things the characters say and do are already set in stone and diverging from that too heavily would be weird when this is a fic that's literally striving to emulate canon but also just lifting lines isn't Fun for anyone because we've all Seen that scene already. like??? ugh
#why is having mike figure out that he's cursed so difficult#like he's SCARY smart#it's not ooc or anything#idk. it might be the secondhand anxiety monster again#the perils of relating too hard to your leading character i guess#and of having to wrangle the character reactions#like i don't despise nancy or anything but she would be so fucking difficult about this#we know how they interact. it's not great#and there are all these People#some of whom have known mike for like yeeeears#and i'm not working with the limitations of television so i couldn't in good faith skip lucas' reaction to mike AND max being in peril#it's just uuuugh#like would they even? grasp? what this symbolises for the state of mike's mental health????#they're either a bit dim or don't know him (or don't... act like they care about him honestly. nance. shape up)#so i kinda doubt it#and then there are max and mike who see each other but they're difficult so they've gotta fight about it#why am i rambling in the tags when i could be writing this STUPID SCENE‚ you ask?#because i don't wanna#like i do but i don't#you know how it is#wip: butterflies and bullshit#bnb posting
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Fucking thank you. A good chunk of my problem is, I'm a harmless weirdo, but no one let me be a harmless weirdo as a kid. As an adult, I'm free to be as harmlessly weird as a damn well please, at least for now. But as a child, that kind of bullshit really fucked me up.
Being an acceptable flavor of queer is a losing proposition. It's a trap designed to make our lives about our oppressors, in addition to having the effect of increasing infighting.
Guys, we have enough forces trying to tear us down. And bigoted assclowns are going to hate us regardless of whether somebody uses neopronouns or whatever the shit. Hating on "the weirdos" in the community is not going to make anyone safer or happier. Worse, it'll make people whose only crime is being a harmless weirdo feel like they have no community support at all, and that's incredibly isolating and demoralizing. And it should be extremely relatable to basically everyone in the LGBTQIA+ community.
We have enough bullies to deal with. Don't be a bully yourself.
I'm also not saying you have to "get it." You're allowed to think it's weird. That's an opinion, and you have a right to that. But just because something seems weird to you, that doesn't mean it's bad or that you should ridicule people over it. At a certain point, how is it any of your business? How does it affect you? Queerphobic assclowns are going to be queerphobic assclowns whether that bun/bunself person wants to use those pronouns or not.
At a certain point, you're just putting more negativity into the world. People aren't going to respect you more just because you shit on others. And you could conceivably do anything else with the time and energy. I'm just saying.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/19d9514b4a5092eb14a09788e8af8163/1ba69ea495c214b5-6e/s540x810/8d65d45f88957a53d3778f9786253a28baf0607f.jpg)
#sorry i usually keep it in the tags but like#i just related so hard to this#neopronouns aren't for me but neither is she her so like#what the hell does that have to do with anything#just because it isn't for me doesn't mean i have any hate in my heart about it#and as a language nerd i honestly think it's cool when you observe language changing in real time#i also nerd out about memes that way#it might be an autism thing#it's hard to know#anyway don't pick on people for being unusual#pick on people for bad shit like being a nazi or something#like don't just dislike someone for some petty bullshit like their pronouns#if you're going to dislike someone it should be because they do bad shit#or because they're bigoted even if they don't act on it#like actual character flaws and shit rather than purr purrself pronouns#i mean grow up bro#what are we in middle school judging people for being preps#grow up#don't we have enough actual problems to deal with#anyway i care a lot about this stuff as u might have guessed#that's almost definitely the tism
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Man, I'm just kind of dazed today
I woke up yesterday around 9am, didn't do much for the day, went to bed... realized it was too hot to fall asleep (cause my window is broken so I can't open it)
So I got up, filled 3 box with papers as I sorted out the magazines and mail
Then I needed to stay up till after 8am so I could go to the post office to return that bowl. Came back and laid down but... you know when your body just feels wired and you really need to sleep but can't? Probably cause it's pumping out hormones to keep me awake to compensate for me being so tired, that's my guess based on how it feels
Anyway, lay down and kind of drift off with a video in the background, but... I think I was just on the verge of sleep but not able to cross over... like dozing at best
Then I hear Bart making noise and look over and he's acting like he's hunting a mouse, and sure enough he was, so he helps me cup it, and then I go take it to a field outside of town to hopefully live a better life... but clearly wasn't sleeping if I'm doing that
And... I'm still up. I think I'm gonna try and take another crack at sleeping... I hope I can do it. Things do at least feel a bit cooler
But yeah, I'm a mess today, gonna be two days worth of dash to look through whenever I get up, and then I can also respond to the couple messages I've got
But oof... hate feeling like this. The non depressed part of me wants to die just because maybe then I could finally rest
#for the record not even feeling that suicidal today; not sure if I'm too tired for it or if I'm just in an ok mood for once#but fuck do I just want to shut off and never have to boot up again; but now and in general#I relate to Bilbo and Frodo talking about being stretched thin... I feel something similar... you know... most of the time#strip the depression aside and I'm tired... and I don't know if any amount of rest will cure it... I don't know if I can truly rest#got a lot of things I want to do; whole lot of skills I want to pick up#but... having to be the parent my whole life; never actually getting a proper break... I'm so tired#my trip to Phoenix was the closest to a break I've gotten; but... there was a set activity in a set time frame#...it still kinda feels like I should have found a way to squeeze more out of it; you know? like as an obligation#not cause I minded how things actually went... but it just felt like I shouldn't have been at the hotel on the couch; should have been out#and then a 3 day window with stressful travel on either side of it... hard to really relax like that#obviously I had a fairly bad breakdown there; one of the few times I was actually at serious risk... not sure if I'd have managed it#don't trust myself to have the nerve to kill myself; but I very much did have a method... if I hadn't had someone to go see the next day#might have just gone ahead with it#but anyway; other than dinner with my friend their friend group and showers... I'm not sure I relaxed there either#I think... I think sleeping was more a maintenance obligation and I sprung up like when I set an alarm#(I so rarely set alarms and almost always wake up a couple minutes before them; it felt like that for 3 days straight)#so... truthfully I don't know if... if I've ever really rested#mhh... no joke; the last time that comes to mind that I didn't feel like I had to be kind of on#was when I was 13 on a school trip; and I'd taken a surf board to the back of the head while being rescued from a rip tide#and so people were worried about me; and I was just kind of laying there relaxing while people played cards and stuff nearby#...mhh... anyway... in less of a mood to say it's a shame I didn't just drown; so I suppose that's something#but... I don't even know what I'm saying; I'm so tired in the lack of sleep sense#and also physically and emotionally or... whatever#well... take care#mm tag so i can find things later
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I'm not going to keep going on about this, because I didn't really mean to make a whole Thing of it, but there are two reasons it really bothers me when people say my books should have had a romance plotline/love interest:
They're saying they wish my protagonist's sexuality was different. When somebody says, "I wish this gay book was straight instead so that I could relate to it more," or whatever, we rightfully recognise that as homophobic. When somebody says, "I wish this aroace character had a love interest," people call that a personal preference and make excuses for why that's not the same thing. Given that my protagonist's sexuality is something she shares with me, it feels particularly unkind, because it's essentially saying, "Lives like yours aren't interesting to me, I wish you had a different sexuality." Ouch.
I may have been exaggerating when I said 99.9% of YA books have a romance plotline... but not by much. It is everywhere. If you want a YA book with romance, you don't have to make any effort to find one, because nine times out of ten, whatever book you pick up will have one. It might be the main plot, it might be the subplot, but it'll be there. I was told repeatedly that I would have to have romance if I wanted my YA books to be published, because the category insists on it. So if you want YA books with romance: basically every other book is for you. It's not like it's a rarity that you were hoping I would finally give you. You have the entire cake; leave us our crumbs.
Like I said in the tags on my original post, this wasn't about one specific person or review. Please don't single anybody out if you've seen them say something similar to this. If it happened once, it wouldn't bother me; it's the pattern, and years of being told before publication that I would have to compromise on this element of the story if I wanted to make it, and social media marketing trends that focus almost exclusively on romance tropes and make it hard to engage when you don't have them.
And, on top of that, it's the weird anxiety of knowing that my next book, the Bisclavret retelling, is more romance-heavy, and while I want it to succeed, there's a bittersweetness to the idea that my yearning book might succeed where my aroace books didn't, purely because romance is marketable and friendship isn't.
(Even though I know there are so many other factors -- different genre, different category, different format, different publisher, different style, and a retelling that can appeal to an existing audience rather than my own characters and story that have no prior fanbase. It still feels like the romance will be what makes the difference.)
As I said on Bluesky yesterday, talking about both my fiction and my academic work:
Okay. That's all.
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My Sweet Valentine - Wanda Maximoff Oneshots
Summary: Delayed in planning Valentine's Day, you and Wanda try to do something together. The spider routine ends up getting in the way, but that doesn't mean the date was lost.
Warnings: (+18) bottom!wanda, enchanted strap, creampie, fingering, dry humping, very fluff and domestic, established relationship, both r and w are briefly specified to be introverted. | Words: 3.206k
A/N-> I had this idea while I was rewatching Sound!Euphonium, I didn't catch the relation to it but I ended up writing this on my phone again so forgive me if there are spelling mistakes. It's always great writing Spider!Reader, I hope you enjoy it.
General Masterlist | AO3 |
-&-
To plan Valentine's Day with your girlfriend should be an easy thing.
But for two Avengers who happen to be the most introverted antisocial people on earth - and those were Natasha's Romanoff words, not yours - the task could be really hard.
But it was you and Wanda's first Valentine's Day as a couple and you were really late on schedule.
While Natasha planned to have the most incredible and romantic trip to Greece with Maria and Tony and Pepper made reservations at some exclusive fancy Italian restaurant, you and Wanda were side to side laying on your apartment carpet. Trying to decide what you could do together by reading some flyers that were spread around the floor.
Wanda had one of the fancy restaurants in her hands when she suggested: “How about dinner?”
You gaze at the restaurant propaganda, recognizing the name and the building from your little web-swinging adventures.
“The Geller’s is nice but it will be really crowded during Valentine's. And we both hate when places are too full.” You reason, receiving an agreement sound. “Maybe we can ask for takeout?”
Wanda chuckles. “On Valentine's Day? Every place will mess up our orders, I'm sure of it. Places are normally understaffed, ordering food on holidays is like asking for them to mess up your food.”
You sigh deeply. “Yeah, you're totally right. So, maybe I can cook?”
She smiles. “We are going for food poisoning then, huh?” She teases making you chuckle with an expression of false offense. You playfully bumped your shoulder on hers but you don't move away after. The touch is warm and nice. “You cook then.”
“Yeah, but is not like we would find any free spots anywhere. We delay this way too much.” She mutters without sounding really upset. Her words were true, you both have been dancing around this date for almost three months now ever since Tony showed everyone his and Pepper's reservations. But neither of you was that anxious to be locked with another hundred couples in some loud restaurant with extra expensive and not-that-good food.
The restaurants were not the only thing discarded - Yelena and Kate's idea of a date, and band concerts were also politely declined. Mostly because neither you nor Wanda felt like facing a whole weekend of poor public hygiene and the crazy routine of musical festivals while babysitting Natasha's little sister who would definitely get really drunk with her girlfriend.
Steve was the one who suggested the most quiet and family thing, a road trip to the countryside. But since he was going with Bucky and you and Wanda didn't wish to be traumatized by their physical display of affection, their invitation was also declined.
Back on the floor of your apartment, you helped Wanda with the papers around the floor.
You were worried she would be upset about the lack of plans - even Sam with his eternal bachelor status was having a date night with some old colleague from the army. You worried that Wanda might think you're not excited to spend time with her when it is pretty much the opposite of it.
“You know, we don't really have to do anything just because everyone is doing.” You start, hands ready to catch the papers she's bringing. “We could just watch a movie.”
Wanda smiles, the papers are put in your hands but she doesn't move hers away.
“If you brought wine it would be like any other date night.”
“That's not a bad thing, right?” You retort immediately, eyes anxious towards hers. She frowns, a confused chuckle escaping her.
“No, I mean… you think that too right?”
You shrug; “I just want to spend Valentine's and any other day with you, Wands. What we are doing doesn't matter much.”
She smiles, coming closer to kiss you on the lips. But the kiss is quicker than you wished. One of her hands caresses your cheek as she speaks:
“Good to know, darling, 'cause I'll be watching you do the dishes tonight.”
You chuckle, rolling her eyes at her teasing but pouting when she escapes your attempt at a second kiss.
-&-
Valentine's Day is unfortunately a busy day for the spider.
It was true that you and Wanda didn't plan anything big but you wanted to bring her some flowers and her favorite chocolate but after fighting another dressed-up lunatic at the city hall and avoiding three different catastrophes, anything inside your backpack was definitely destroyed.
You swing back into your apartment with the mess of your gifts dripping to the floor. The wine bottle broke and soaked the chocolate and the poor flowers. Bye-bye to any college homework you forgot there.
Throwing the item at the sink, your body towards the couch was the second thing you threw.
And against the soft pillows the day tiredness caught up at you. With the thought that you would rest your eyes for five minutes, you woke up hours later with the door locked.
Wanda's angry arrival was also an efficient clock.
“God, what is wrong with you? I've been calling you all day!” She slammed the door behind her, and the next second the day's newspaper was thrown at you. “Do you have any idea how worried I was? We have talked about this! You can't just fight some three-sized villain and vanish without a word! I thought-” But she stops herself, taking a deep breath when her voice cracks. You feel so terrible sorry. You know very well that Wanda has lost enough people for the whole ghosting thing to be too hard on her. Intentional or not.
You get up. “Hey, I'm so sorry Wands, my phone broke and I came right here and closed my eyes for like two seconds. I'm sorry.” But Wanda shook her head, covering her eyes for a moment. She was not even that mad at you, it was clearly an accident that you forgot to call. But she has been so nervous all day worried about you that she needed a minute. Suddenly, she catches a glimpse of the wine-soaked flowers at the kitchen counter and frowns. “What is that?”
The slight indignation about the mess of an apartment you both worked hard to keep clean vanished the second she realized those were gifts.
You fixed your hair awkwardly. “Hm, I was trying to make a romantic gesture. But I forgot I'm always on some freak radar.”
Wanda's hands reached for the flowers and as gentle as her touch, her magic flowed from her fingers to take all the wine away. In no time, the petals were as beautiful and healthy as when you brought it.
“This is really not fair, darling.” She starts, moving to check the rest of the gifts. “You made it to the front page and I have every right to be mad you didn't call through the suit to let me know you're alive.” You wanted to mutter that you're still getting used to the new suit and its high-tech functions, but Wanda is turning at you again with crossed arms.
“It’s not fair, how hard you're making to stay mad at you.”
You gave her a lopsided smile. “So, you like the chocolate that much, huh?”
She rolled her eyes, trying to contain her smile. “Why don't you go shower while I make dinner? There's grease from Rino's suit all over your face.”
You click with your tongue, swinging a little. “Let me guess, you not joining me at the shower is my punishment for not calling through the suit?”
She finally let that smile escape. “Clever girl.”
You chuckle to yourself before nodding and heading to the bathroom.
-&-
Forgotten dinner plates at the living room table when Wanda reached the chocolate box. She shared them with you during the sitcom marathon you too were doing but after finding yourself hypnotized by her laugh for the fourth time in a row, you gave up eating at all.
The last chocolate was put away when she caught you staring.
“What?”
“What what?” You retort with a chuckle, having some pride over the soft blush of her cheeks.
“You were staring.” She says then, drifting her gaze from the TV to you with some resistance. You know her enough that it's because Wanda is terrible at hiding her own shyness under your loving glance. She always was.
“Can you blame me?” Your teasing just makes her blush more. You just decide to make it worse. “You're simply too charming not to be looked at. So gorgeous, so pretty. I feel so lucky.”
“Stop it.” She giggles with rosy cheeks at your praise. But despite her words, she opens her arms as an invitation for you to come closer. You practically jump from your spot - a few centimeters from her since your last trip to the kitchen to grab sodas - and greet the warmth of her embrace.
Wanda hugs your body while you melt into her, the soft caress on your spine being more than enough to bring back your interrupted slumber that evening. But somehow you manage to stay wide awake, perhaps because the way you press your face into her boobs makes her giggle and playfully tug at your hair, which happens to have a completely different effect on you.
Her body tenses up a little when your lips start sucking at her collarbone, a heavy sigh escaping her lips. You suddenly recall that it has been some time, a week maybe two since you had enough free time to be this close.
Your lovely girlfriend probably missed you as much as you missed her.
The soft sucking turns into something more determined, then into a bite and a licking that turns Wanda into a panting mess. She grows restless under you, fingers tugging at your hair with some guidance towards your movements in her neck until finally, your mouth meets her again.
Hot open-mouthed kisses before softer ones. You kiss and she kisses you back until all of your clothes are disheveled around your bodies and she looks up at you with pleading eyes and slightly open lips. Begging for more.
“Wanna take this to the bedroom?” You suggest inches from her lips but she shakes her head, fingers dancing under your shirt.
“You can have me right here.” She whispers back, stealing all your coherent thoughts for a second.
Your hands are shaking a bit with eagerness when you pull at your clothes, with Wanda's help they are off in no time. Her chest heaves when you take her top off and Wanda stares back while you can't seem to be able to look away from her tits.
“You good there?” She teases you breathlessly when your lack of action lingers. You chuckle, hands at her sides.
“Yeah, just give me a minute.” You retort managing an affectionate roll of eyes from her.
“You're such a dork.” She giggles but purposely lifts her chest in your direction, making you swallow hard. When you don't take the bait immediately, she sighs. “I would love for you to more than stare, detka.”
You groan, hovering over her. “Well, your wish is my command, madam” You reply, leaning down to capture her lips. Teasing Wanda with soft bites on her lower lip every time you break the kiss before starting another turns her into a needy mess under you. She gets impatient very quickly and brings her hands to your cheeks, pulling you down with determination. Her tongue takes the lead in a heated kiss that takes all the air out of your lungs.
Panting against her mouth while trying to match the intensity of her demand, you let your hands grope around her body towards her chest, effectively taking the lead again when you start playing with her hardened nipples and Wanda loses her ability to kiss you back.
When she whimpers into your mouth, her hips restless while your fingers pinch her cute tits, you chuckle. “Ah, is there something you want, baby?”
She struggles to speak firmly. "I need you to stop teasing and fuck me." You grunt at her answer. You would have obeyed immediately if you hadn't been able to feel Wanda shaking. She gasps as you adjust, your knee finding her middle and giving her something to grind against as you resume your actions on her breasts. She throws her head back, biting her lip hard as her hips move almost of their own accord.
It's a hot mess, her first orgasm of the night. You didn't even have to take off all her clothes. When Wanda shivers terribly, and you feel the wetness against your knee, you bite down at her tit and that makes her let out a muffled scream.
Wanda is panting and her face is very flushed when you look at her again, her expression satisfied after an intense orgasm.
You hum happily, moving your hands down as you tilt your face to kiss her on the lips. She gasps into your mouth when she feels your fingers draw a path through her ruined panties.
"You made such a mess, sweetheart." You whisper between one kiss and another, two digits pushing gently without even removing her underwear. Wanda arches toward you, squeezing your shoulders for something to hold on to. Her green eyes are completely dilated now and you love how they display a vulnerable begging. Pulling your fingers out again, you let your thumb draw circles on her covered clit and enjoy the way her thighs tremble around you. "Tell me what you want, Wanda."
She has a little difficulty responding while feeling you teasing her, but despite noticing her heartbeat against your fingertips, you don't interrupt your movements. If anything, they become even more determined. Wanda pants, hips trying to match the rhythm of your fingers.
"C-can we use the strap tonight?" She manages out of breath. "I like feeling you come inside me."
Your witch girlfriend's favorite toy is somewhere in the room, and given the busy schedule of two superheroes, it wasn't used as often as you would like. Wanda has barely suggested, and you're already nodding, panting aroused just imagining yourself stretching Wanda again.
But suddenly your fingers push the fabric out of the way, and you sink inside her without warning, ripping a moan from her throat.
"Give me one more first." You demand, watching as Wanda nods in near desperation, brow furrowed at her rapidly building orgasm. Your rhythm is brutal, and she squeezes and squeezes until you can barely push your fingers inside her. You bring your free hand to one of her thighs, forcing her open as you adjust to improve your reach. Wanda sees stars. She lets go of your shoulders to grab the cushions and ends up destroying half of them with magical expelling when she finally falls over the edge.
An impressed chuckle escapes you at the scene. You're usually the one responsible for destroying things with your spider strength - It's always nice to see Wanda lose some of the control she's fought so hard to have.
Kissing her softly, you feel her smile in some exhaustion. She needs a few seconds, so you pull out your fingers and suck them clean while green eyes watch you from below. Wanda wants to kiss you again, but you adjust to carry her on your lap, and after two orgasms in a row, she won't contradict you.
She feels the soft blankets against her back a moment later and relaxes fully into the bed as you move around the room working to find and put on the strap. It doesn't take more than two minutes, yet Wanda sighs impatiently before letting her hands roam her own body, pinching her breasts and teasing downwards. She bites her lip at the soaked state she finds herself in, tentatively collecting some of that moisture before hearing a husky laugh that makes her look up.
"You don't have to play alone, I'm right here." You let her know softly, but Wanda swallows at the sight of your naked figure and the enchanted hardness between your legs. Of all the things she learned to do, that honestly has to be her best spell. One of your hands grabs the silicone, instinctively or not, imitating the masturbation gesture that Wanda is making and she shudders to the tips of her toes, her body on fire. Her hand moves out of her panties immediately, raising it into the air in a beckoning gesture. You don't need to be told twice.
It's a breathless kiss when you reach her face again, equally eager to feel each other, there's a little war of pushing and pulling until Wanda feels completely pressed into the bed, the strap rubbing against her entrance.
You pull away when she whimpers - It's just to pull down her panties, and Wanda kicks the item away as you climb back up. Your mouth finds hers again so that when you align the strap and sink into her, you can swallow her moans.
The stretch is slow and careful, very different from the breathless way you were making out a few minutes ago. Wanda lets her nails dig into your lower back as you fight the urge to be rougher.
She gets used to the size very quickly, the creaminess of her previous orgasms making an obscene sound that makes her ears redden. You break the kiss to ask if she's ready and the only response you get is a determined throw of her hips up that registers her impatience.
In all quickies, you're always rough. Desperate to feel her, because you miss Wanda as much as she misses you, and in the rush, there's no time to prolong moments like this. But it's the first time in many months that you're relaxed, and you can thrust slowly and sensually inside Wanda, letting her feel every movement of your cock inside her warm walls as you kiss her and whisper praises in her ear.
Heat is spread under your skin, and sweat accumulates with the slow stimulation. You feel closer each time you sink inside her, and when Wanda starts whimpering in your ear, it feels like an impossible task to hold it.
"You're close?" You pant, hips starting to buckle. "I don't think… I can hold it anymore... Wands-" You choke, letting your face fall against her collarbone. The knot in your abdomen explodes without warning, and you moan deeply as you spill yourself inside Wanda, the enchanted strap vibrating inside her. It turns out that feeling you come was the push she needed, and Wanda sobs as she feels the blinding pleasure hit her, following you into climax a second later.
For a moment, all that can be heard in that room are your breathless sighs until your hoarse and satisfied chuckles emerge.
You remain inside her when you adjust so that you rest your elbows on the mattress and see her face.
"Hey, little witch."
She pushes back her sweaty hair with one hand, the other moving to rest on your neck. "Hey, spider."
Your nose brushes against hers. "I think we nailed Valentine's Day."
She giggles before pulling you for a kiss.
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