#This isn’t to say that some of them didn’t come across as rude or disrespectful but it actually wasn’t common knowledge at the time if
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I know it’s generally in good fun when making jokes about how young fujoshi in the early 2000s-2010s talked about queer couples (i.e. “yuri couple, yaoi couple, i see no difference love is love” or “if you police people’s identities you are not yaoiful at all”) but if you look at it from the lens of acknowledging that this, for many of them, is their first time even realising being queer was an option, it’s a very interesting study in realising that this is an attempt at inclusion from the perspective of someone who may not have ever heard of things like gender identity or sexuality beyond “boy” and “girl”.
#This isn’t to say that some of them didn’t come across as rude or disrespectful but it actually wasn’t common knowledge at the time if#You were in a conservative area or family until you came across a ship of two men or two women online w/o constant monitoring#please don’t derail about things like fiction affecting reality or whatever idc if they were watching boku no pico or DMMD#yaoi#bl manga#gl manga#yuri#queer#queer community#queer awakening#profic#proship#early internet#early 2000s#mid 2010s#early 2010s#fanfic.net#ao3#archive of our own#fanfiction dot net#livejournal#quotev#wattpad#fujoshi
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I’m working in a chancellery as a student since 3 months, I’m sitting at the reception. I really like to work there and I’m doing a good job. Every lawyer is very kind and friendly. Just this one lawyer never says hello to me or when he comes in he doesn’t even look at me. I didn’t care at the beginning. Last time I opened the door and saw him coming towards me, so I waited for him and held the door. He didn’t say thank you or even smiled. Since then it’s bothering me a little bit, I think his behavior is rude.
I stopped looking at him to or smiling at him, because I feel dumb when I’m doing this. With the other lawyers and workers there he isn’t like that.
Do you have an advice?
Thank you🤍
It's understandable that his behavior might bother you. People have different ways of interacting, and it's possible he may not realize his actions are coming across as rude. He may be the type of person that can take a while to be open to new people. He may just not be a friendly person at work. He may be a rude guy. Or he may not have any interest in talking to you. None of these things are a reflection of you. You could try giving it some time, and if you feel comfortable, you could address the situation politely and express how you feel if it comes to a point where he’s disrespectful.
This is your work place and I still think you should be polite. However there is a difference between being polite to someone you do not have rapport with and going out of your way to wait for someone to get to an elevator. Especially someone who doesn’t acknowledge you. That’s just doing too much and is probably why your feelings are hurt. Stop going above and beyond for people who do not even extend the courtesy of a simple hello. It’s not going to make them like you more. Boundaries.
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Let’s call that more or less done. I will still direct people to my response post and answer questions, but rest assured, my terrible and juvenile sense of humour stays. I will explain what I actually think about something on a serious post if asked, but my stupid joke posts will stay stupid because I’m not smart. Things will get exaggerated, things will even be grotesquely exaggerated depending on who you ask. I apologise only for when I have a bad attitude or come across as rude, but I won’t apologise for what looks like a take on a post of mine when there’s not meant to be one. Yes if someone isn’t sure and asks, I will say “oh actually I didn’t intend for it to be taken seriously” and I hope that doesn’t come off as the Schrödinger’s asshole situation. It’s always been the case where most, if not all of my posts are just meant to entertain people who have similar sense of humour as I do (my condolences to these people /jk)
Nothing is ever going to dissuade me from thinking up stupid posts and post them. Some of them should probably stay in the draft, but hey, not everyone has common sense. Even people whose opinions are something like “you are going too far for a joke because it strays from canon too much”
Yes. My posts will stray from canon, sometimes too much, and they will continue to be that way. Yes. They are stupid. Yes. They are oversimplified and over exaggerated and do not faithfully represent canon whatsoever. It’s never meant to be informative, it’s never meant to be a thinly veiled opinion hidden behind a shitpost, and I will never claim otherwise. Sincerely, that’s where I’m at and that’s where I’m coming from consistently on this blog.
But it’s fine on both sides. It’s always a potentiality when you make posts in any fandom. People responding to my posts whatever their attitude may be, it’s all fine. If a post bothers or upsets you, it’s counterintuitive for many to assume OP comes from any place of good faith. And that’s why I respond to every post and try to explain myself. Most people don’t know about this account or what I post here, and not everyone has the same attitude as I do about certain things a large amount of people are passionate about. And that’s a good thing. This fandom benefits from serious discussions, I’m just not adding to that myself. I’ll try to gently guide away people who are a bit more serious than I am about these posts as soon as I can manage just to save everyone’s trouble (and this isn’t to be dismissive, I just don’t think it’s a good thing to let misunderstandings percolate for too long, I don’t imagine it to be nice when you draft out a discussion/argument/response to a post and OP comes back with a ‘LOL it’s not that deep bro’. That’s when it becomes disrespectful and exasperatingly so. Another thing is with the intention to only post shits and giggles, the last thing I want is for people to be riled up and get angry about them, it really is just not worth it. Frankly I also don’t want that level of stress for myself either. So I try to put my disclaimer in early before many spend their time on things like this.) and you are certainly welcome to block me if you don’t like what you see here. No offence taken, it’s not personal.
The only thing that is personal is if I myself come off as an asshole in any discussion and if I am, please let me know, I’ll fix that.
#I’ll keep this post up top for a little bit so anyone who cares sees it#my bullshit my rant i am the captain of my own ship and all that crap#oh this is for#de#de posts
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Respectfully, while I think your takes would be understandable if I was talking about something more vague and general about expressing distaste for being isolated from community…
It seems that you chose to instead take the easiest points to criticize from my entire post, which has a lot more context that is necessary to understand it in the first place, and go on a separate tangent that has nothing to do with what I’m talking about.
I’m not coming at you in a rude or disingenuous way because I understand where you’re coming from. However, you even admitting in the beginning of your response that you don’t know a lot about transandrophobia and it’s history and the kind of people who have been pushing it onto everyone else as some sort of well established ‘truth’ rather than what it actually is: a tantrum being thrown by (mostly) nonblack trans men and transmasculine people because they assume no one cares about them in comparison to trans women.
When trans men/transmascs are blaming trans women for the lack of ‘attention’, even in a covert way which is what ‘transandrophobia’ is doing, that is an intracommunity issue that needs to be addressed and criticized because what someone ‘feels’ is not always the same as what is reality. We all need to understand that as people living in a community together. And they are not doing this naively and out of care for the entire trans community, they’re clearly doing this for the benefit of being the center of attention in trans issues overall with no regard for how they’re ideas are coming across to the people they share community with. A lot of it is blatant disrespect that comes from a lack of nuance regarding gender dynamics even within trans spaces.
I explained this in my entire post, with additional points about how race, culture, and other things effect different minority groups in regards to gender expression and identity.
Again, I would normally agree with some of your points if I had been talking about men just expressing themselves in a general sense but I wasn’t. I, a transmasc person of color, was criticizing an issue that I do not like within my own community and the explicit racism and (trans)misogyny that they are currently spreading under the guise of ‘talking about trans man/transmasc issues’.
I was being very specific throughout this entire post yet you only latched onto the smallest phrases I typed to go on your own tangents with and didn’t consider those phrases within the actual context that I wrote them in. Maybe there’s a difference in understanding since I am speaking from and addressing this issue that’s predominantly in a Western/American context? I can understand that.
I just feel like I needed to address your response because what you had to say isn’t really related to the specific issue that I’m criticizing for the reasons stated in this post. I very clearly talk about serious issues like racism and transmisogyny yet you chose not to actually engage with those topics. Your response is more about a general thing that I would have already agreed with in another context not related to this particular topic.
Mmm 🤔 I genuinely think another big reason that trans men and transmascs are holding onto the idea of ‘transandrophobia’ is because a good portion of them, including myself, grew up on this website where the early days of the trans community pretty much coddled and served us, all the time. And then, when many of us actually started to transition (be it socially and/or physically), it was a wake up call that reminded many of us that being read as a man by society means that your are going to be treated differently than how you were previously.
Like, this whole situation is just a giant example of ‘social amnesia’ because anyone who was on tumblr in the early days knows exactly what I’m talking about. There were hundreds upon hundreds of posts made specifically for afab trans/nonbinary people. There was constant encouragement for trans men to express themselves however they wanted to, especially if they presented in a stereotypically feminine way. There were whole ‘passing’ guides made predominantly for trans men and transmasculine people and rarely anything for trans women and transfems.
So to me, this whole ‘transandrophobia’ thing reads like a giant temper tantrum being thrown by grown ass people who cannot fathom that they are no longer those ‘uwu little soft boys’ from the early tumblr days of their own youth and that they actually have to be accountable for their behavior towards other people now that they are being read as adults/adult men. Particularly, towards women (trans women are obviously included when I say this but I’m just putting this here so there is no confusion).
Like, seeing some of them say such out of pocket stuff like ‘uwu I lost the privilege of having women as friends and being able to see myself as a victim and it feels so isolating being a man uwu’ just tells me how little they actually understand the ways in which systems of power and oppression work AND that they’re making their personal relationships with women out to be completely one-sided while suspiciously not ever considering their own behavior towards those women 🤔.
It’s never as simple as ‘women have it easy because they can become friends with each other and can see themselves as victims because of female socialization (which is literally a TERF term that blatantly supports bioessentialism…why are y’all using it???)’ Did y’all seriously forget that racism still exists for women of color? Did y’all seriously forget that many minority men will still have access to conditional privileges, as long as they can demonstrate ‘manhood’ in an acceptable way (which many of them do, so it ends up leading to serious misogyny in their own communities)?
And it’s really irking me to see not just some black trans men and transmascs feeding into this racist, MRA shit but to also see non black trans men/transmascs using issues specifically pertaining to anti-blackness (ex ‘masculine black people are seen as aggressive so therefore, it’s androphobia uwu’) to try to support their flimsy arguments and it’s genuinely infuriating. Even more specifically, it is white trans men and transmascs doing this while (ironically) denying transmasc poc their identities when we speak up against them. You are taking the context of anti-blackness away from those specific issues and trying to re-contextualize it to conveniently fit your ideas and it is incredibly harmful.
Victimhood has never been a ‘privilege’ for any women, except for cis white women (and even then, there can be limitations), so the fact that so many of these transandrophobia truthers see ‘womanhood’ as synonymous with ‘victimhood’ just tells me that they do not have enough nuance or even respect for what any women, especially women of color, have been through. Ask any woman outside of the US or Canada or the UK about their experiences existing as women. Hell, ask any woman here in the US how they’re feeling considering the insane amount of anti-trans AND anti-abortion laws that have been cropping up. Cis women, trans women, transfems, and afab nonbinary folks are all witnessing the same injustices of bodily autonomy as trans men and transmascs, yet this realization isn’t really hitting home to them.
They’re basing this entire ‘movement’ off of personal experiences where they are treated like the men they are, told to take some level of accountability for their behavior (which their tumblr addled brains aren’t used to), and then claiming that there’s some sinister ‘attack’ on masculinity when it’s far more complex than that. Femininity is in no way ‘rewarded’ as much as y’all claim it is, even in queer spaces.
Both femininity and masculinity can be rewarded and punished, in various ways, that are not going to be easy to understand at first glance. There are people who, when performing either of these things in the ‘acceptable’ way to a cisheteronormative society, will be rewarded the conditional privileges and acceptance that comes with it. And there are some people who will be punished for either not sticking to either of these or switching between them or mashing them together. However, there are many outside factors like race, sexuality, and culture that can also heavily influence who is more likely to be punished for these displays of rebellion than others.
I’m not sure how to end this but I do want to propose a question that more folks, regardless of gender, should start asking themselves before they start speaking on important social issues: is it really about you wanting to help the community or is it about you wanting to be noticed?
Because I’m gonna tell y’all this now…there is a world of difference between the two and you can’t have both, as much as tumblr will try to convince you that you can. If it’s just about you, then it can’t be about the community and if it’s about the community, then it can’t just be about you.
NOTE: if you’re not going to be nuanced or relatively understanding of the power dynamics I’m referring to in this post, don’t interact. I’m not about to argue with anyone.
#self rb#long post#like…i get where you’re coming from and im not saying your inherently wrong#but out of all 400 other people who reblogged this (most of them being trans women)#you are the only person to take it completely out of context and only focus on#the smallest possible phrases in the entire post that actually had a purpose outside of what you were criticizing them for
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Another Life || Carlisle Cullen x Deaf!GN!Reader
Im taking a crack at this fanfiction stuff. Im so sorry if this isn’t good at all ;-; Anyways, this is inspired by an art piece I saw on Twitter a long time ago and thought it would make a pretty scenario… Enjoy?
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You walked throughout the gallery, taking in the old and precious art on the walls. The paintings telling their own personal stories yet speaking close to your heart at the very same time. It’s a lot easier to find comfort in art and books than music or television when you don’t have the ability to hear the latter. Not impossible, of course. Just easier is all.
You keep a steady pace, drinking it all in when you come across a very tall painting. It consists of a Man, dressed in fancy attire, kneeling before a Monarch of some sort. You slowly halt your steps in front of the Monarch, studying their features. Something about them seemed so familiar, their face shape, their eyes, their skin.
‘𝘏𝘶𝘩.’ You thought to yourself. ‘𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘔𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩 ���𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘢 𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘣𝘪𝘵.’
You slightly smile and roll your eyes.
‘𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩. 𝘐𝘧 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘴 𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘮𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘐’𝘥 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘢𝘧𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘢 𝘤𝘰𝘤𝘩𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳.’
You didn’t think of yourself as broken. In fact, being deaf was nice sometimes. But living in a hearing world while being, well, the exact opposite, was very frustrating. People are rude, ableist and overall disrespectful to to those with disabilities. That’s part of the reason you came to this art gallery, here it’s a social norm to be as quiet as a mouse. So you never had to worry about people talking to you and expecting you to respond.
Until today, of course.
During your series of thoughts regarding the Monarch, and how similar you both looked, you missed a certain pale man standing next to you. His features also seemingly identical to the man in the painting. I mean, it was him after all. Not a thing had changed since the painting was made. Well, except his fashion choice, of course.
He went to the gallery for, ironically, the same reason as you. Well, almost. Having extreme sensitive hearing was getting to him. Being a doctor, plus a vampire, he heard everything. 𝘌𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. He needed an escape, somewhere that silence was a given. He did hear the occasional whispers of awe and confusion, but he didn’t mind. It was better than a library, where he had already read all the books they had to offer.
It was also slightly amusing. Some of the people in the paintings he had met in real life, and hearing peoples theories of who they were and what they were like was entertaining. The real fun though, were the paintings he’s in. Of course there’s the one in his home of him in Volterra. But he’s been around for hundreds of years, there was obviously more than that one painting.
Oh and there were. Walking slowly through the gallery, he came across the same picture you were standing in front of. His appearance in the painting catching his eye as he walked towards it. But nothing could have prepared him for you. As he got closer to you he noticed how… 𝘍𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘢𝘳, you looked.
𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘩𝘢𝘪𝘳, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧…
𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘵.
He stopped in front of himself (in the painting, of course). Yet, he couldn’t keep his eyes off of 𝘺𝘰𝘶. Everything about you reminded him of them. He’s usually extremely aware of his manners, not staring when he sees someone familiar to his old friends from centuries ago, but he couldn’t help it. You were exactly like them.
He had to say something, yet he was frozen in place.
‘𝘚𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘴 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘳𝘶𝘥𝘦!’ He thought.
He was plucking up the courage to speak to you, embarrassed over the fact that he was reduced to silence. After everything he had seen and been through, you’d think he’d have better control over his emotions. Yet, here he was, just another statue among the gallery. He was gonna talk to you, he had already made up his mind. Here he goes!
Just before he could utter a single word, you turned towards him, aiming to walk away, but instead finding a man staring at you like you had two heads.
‘𝘖𝘩 𝘯𝘰, 𝘩𝘦’s 𝘵𝘳𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦!’
That would be the only explanation right? He was staring at you, waiting for you to respond when you hadn’t heard what he had said in the first place! You immediately start signing in hopes he understands you’re situation. Your hands quickly gesturing towards your ears, trying to silently explain you hadn’t heard anything he had said.
However, your panicked signing and the better view of your face had only pulled him deeper into his memories. The relationship between him and the human in the painting was simple. The human had no ability to hear, yet he had the ability to hear more than any human alive. He promised to keep them safe, to be their guide, 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘬𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵. In return, they promised their silence, to keep his secret.
While he was reminiscing, you were panicking.
‘𝘏𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯’𝘵 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥! 𝘖𝘳 𝘮𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘩𝘦’𝘴 𝘰𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘥? 𝘉𝘰𝘵𝘩!?’
You remembered the notepad in your bag. You had brought it for this exact reason, not everyone knows sign. However, tapping your ear and eluding to the fact you’re deaf seems a little hard to miss. Maybe he just lacked common sense? Though, before you could pull your pen and pad out, you felt a tap on your shoulder. You looked towards the man, curious.
“𝙄’𝙢 𝙨𝙤𝙧𝙧𝙮. 𝙄 𝙙𝙞𝙙𝙣’𝙩 𝙢𝙚𝙖𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙘𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪.” He signed.
Your mouth gaped, he was signing?
“𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠𝙚𝙙 𝙨𝙤 𝙢𝙪𝙘𝙝 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙈𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙧𝙘𝙝 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜. 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙞𝙣 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙘𝙠.” He continued.
Now was your turn to be frozen. You genuinely weren’t expecting him to sign back, it’s definitely not something you were used too. After a small pause you started to giggle, pulling your hands out of your bag.
“𝙔𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙚, 𝙄𝙢 𝙨𝙤𝙧𝙧𝙮 𝙄 𝙙𝙞𝙙𝙣’𝙩 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙨𝙖𝙮𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙗𝙚𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙚.” You signed back.
“𝘿𝙤𝙣’𝙩 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙧𝙮, 𝙄 𝙙𝙞𝙙𝙣’𝙩 𝙨𝙖𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜. 𝙎𝙤𝙧𝙧𝙮 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜.”
That made your anxiety go down a bit, but some of it still stayed. You just made a fool of yourself in front of someone who hadn’t said a word to you. You felt the heat rush back to your cheeks.
“𝘿𝙤𝙣’𝙩 𝙗𝙚 𝙚𝙢𝙗𝙖𝙧𝙧𝙖𝙨𝙨𝙚𝙙, 𝙞𝙛 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙄 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙗𝙚. 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜, 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙬𝙖𝙨𝙣’𝙩 𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙛 𝙢𝙚. 𝙄’𝙢 𝙨𝙤𝙧𝙧𝙮, 𝙖𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣.” He signed bashfully.
You shook your head lightly, still keeping your eyes on him. Now you were staring at the beautiful pale man. But now, you had an idea. You reached back into your bag, grabbing your notebook and your pen. He looked at you confused. He could sign, you didn’t need the notebook. You quickly scribbled your name and number onto a paper before tearing it off and handing it to him, stuffing the notepad and pen back in your bag.
“𝙈𝙖𝙮𝙗𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙢𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙞𝙩 𝙪𝙥 𝙩𝙤 𝙢𝙚 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚?” You smiled, handing him the paper shakily
He took the paper and held it in his cold hands, reading it while smiling a bittersweet smile. He folded the paper, putting it in his pocket.
“𝙈𝙖𝙮𝙗𝙚 𝙄 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡… 𝙔/𝙣.”
You let out a small breath, relaxing your shoulders. You were more nervous of his answer than you thought.
“𝙄 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙞𝙩…” you gestured towards him, awaiting his name.
“𝘾𝙖𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙡𝙚.” He answered.
“𝘾𝙖𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙡𝙚. 𝙎𝙚𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙣.”
You started walking the way you had originally planned to, had you not met Carlisle. Wanting to go home for the day, and also not wanting to spontaneously combust from how anxious you were. Your heart was beating so fast it was almost humming. Being extra self-conscious of how you were walking, you planned each step before you took it.
He smiled as you walked away in a controlled manner, chuckling to himself. He wanted to see what other exhibits the gallery had to offer, starting to walk towards the next painting. But not before taking one last glance at the painting of his old friend. A friend from another life.
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Here you are, an extremely small one-shot! First time writing anything like this so don’t be too harsh.
#carlisle cullen#carlisle#carlisle x reader#carlisle cullen x reader#is this cringe#its probably cringe#y/n#deaf!y/n#carlisle x deaf reader#carlisle cullen x deaf reader#twilight#twilight fanfiction#carlisle fanfiction#deaf y/n#gender neutral reader#deaf reader#gn!y/n#carlisle cullen fanfiction#carlisle reader insert#carlisle cullen reader insert#carlisle cullen x gn!reader#carlisle x gn!reader#carlisle x y/n#carlisle cullen x y/n
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𝓐 𝓵𝓮𝓽𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓽𝓸 𝓖𝔀𝔂𝓷𝓻𝓲𝓮𝓵𝓼
Dear Gwynriels,
As Gwynriel Week officially comes to a close, I wanted to write a mini thank you letter to all of you guys.
I had the idea of doing a Gwynriel Appreciation Week back in November and on December 11 I made a post asking users on Tumblr if they would be open to the idea. Needless to say, the answer was a resounding and enthusiastic yes.
From that moment on I started making accounts, writing prompts, and planning many different things for this week, but even with how much I posted about it, I never imagined it would been as big as it was. In one week alone we’ve received about 68 fanarts and about 100 posts across all the platforms (Tumblr, Instagram, and Twitter) and I am eternally grateful to every single person who contributed. To Gwynriel’s who were not able to participate, I thank you for your support of all the content creators and leaving likes, reblogs, retweets, and comments, showing your love for Gwyn and Az too.
I’m still relatively new to being active in this fandom and I wanted to do this week because I didn’t participate in the previous one that happened back in August last year. I wanted to share my love and absolute adoration of these two again and nothing fills me with more pride than to see the entire community come together for no reason other than love we have for this couple. It wasn’t to be petty or to one up another ship, it was because we loved Gwynriel, simple as that.
I know that this week hasn’t been the easiest experience for some of us as there was a considerable amount of hate being thrown at us merely for appreciating what we love. I ask and encourage you all to see the behavior that was thrown at us this week and not do it to others. We know what it’s like for people to throw rude and disrespectful comments at us, for users to shame us for shipping what we want, etc. and it’s not a nice feeling at all. So please, when another ship has an appreciation event for the couple they enjoy do not, I repeat, do not send them hate or make fun of them, regardless of if they did it to us. It is not nice, and it is not right.
Gwynriel Week 2022 has been an incredibly memorable experience for me, and I could not be prouder of our community for coming together. Waking up to see new stories, headcanons, incorrect quotes, fanart, edits, etc. always made my day, but seeing how much you all enjoyed it too made me even happier. There will be an official Gwynriel Week Mega Masterlist that has a link to (hopefully) every single post that was made across all platforms and I aim to get it out by the end of this week. I am honored to have hosted this week and I hope I get to do it again sometime in the future. Thank you all for being nothing but a joy to interact with this past week.
If it isn’t clear already, I love this fandom so much. You guys are all so incredibly supportive and kind, and while there are users who say disrespectful and harmful things, there are so many more good Gwynriels than bad and this week proved that (please call out toxic behavior when you see it though).
With all that being said, thank you for welcoming me with open arms into this fandom and for being the most amazing people ever. I don’t think I’ve ever seen this community more alive, and it truly was a blessing to witness.
My dearest Gwynriel friends, from the bottom of my heart to the top of it, I love you💜
Sincerely,
Sue
#gwynriel#gwynriel week 2022#gwynriel week#gwyn berdara#azriel#azriel x gwyn#gwyn x azriel#pro gwynriel
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It’s a strange feeling to learn something new about a person you thought you knew everything about, and the newness leaves a strange taste in Jiang Cheng’s mouth, a faintly uncomfortable feeling in his gut.
It’s not anything major – not really anyway – and it shouldn’t bother him so much but…
But…
But the thing is…
Wei Wuxian lies.
He lies a lot.
And his lies are about stupid things – like that he’s fine when he’s obviously not, and that he’s forgotten something when he hasn’t, and…
Well, he lies.
And it’s surprising to Jiang Cheng, because he always thought that Wei Wuxian was basically incapable of lying. Incapable of just saying nice shit to smooth things over. Incapable of hiding his feelings at the expense of someone else’s pride. Incapable of just saying some stupid white lie when some idiot in charge asked him something.
Incapable.
Now, Jiang Cheng realizes that Wei Wuxian wasn’t incapable, he was just unwilling.
And maybe it’s because of this new face – younger and stranger and just a little bit familiar – or maybe it’s because Jiang Cheng is older now, and maybe just a little bit wiser, but it’s easier to read Wei Wuxian now.
Easier to see the slight downturn of his lips before he gives a fake smile. Easier to notice the strange, tired nervousness in his eyes as he checks to see if his lies have been believed.
Easier.
Easier to see, but not any easier to understand.
“So you just randomly decided to come to Lotus Pier,” he asks slowly, his eyes carefully tracking every nervous tick of Wei Wuxian’s brow.
“Yeah,” Wei Wuxian smiles, scrunching up his nose as if he’s being mischievous. “Can I stay, oh great Sect leader Jiang?”
He’s so obviously unhappy that it makes Jiang Cheng’s jaw ache.
“I promise I won’t stay long. Maybe just a week. And I’ll be quiet. You’ll barely know I’m here!”
“Shut up,” Jiang Cheng sighs, stepping to the side to let Wei Wuxian in through the gate. “Since when have you needed my permission to stay here.”
“Your kindness knows no bounds, great Sect Leader Jiang,” Wei Wuxian says, bowing obnoxiously as he slides his way past Jiang Cheng.
“It knows bounds and I’m sure you’ll test them,” Jiang Cheng replies, kicking at Wei Wuxian’s knees as he follows him inside.
Wei Wuxian hums as he walks and excitedly waves to disciples he knows.
To anyone else, he probably looks careless and happy, but Jiang Cheng knows better.
He can see the tense set of his shoulders, the forced bounce in his steps, the fake lift of his lips and the way his smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes.
His stupid brother is miserable and it’s obvious. Achingly so.
It makes something clench tightly in Jiang Cheng’s stomach. A strange, stuffy feeling in his chest. It’s…
Irritating.
“You know where your room is,” he says, wanting to quickly part from Wei Wuxian before this irritation grows into something bigger. “Should I expect your stupid husband to be here soon?”
That Lan-er will know how to handle a sad Wei Wuxian. And, historically speaking, wherever Wei Wuxian goes, Lan-er is soon to follow. There’s no way he’d let Wei Wuxian just hang out in Lotus Pier by himself for a week.
Wei Wuxian stumbles over his own feet at the mention of the Lan-er.
“Ah, Lan Zhan?” he asks, a weak smile on his face.
Strange.
“He’s not coming.”
Very strange.
Jiang Cheng feels a strange nervousness join the irritation in his stomach. If the Lan-er isn’t coming, then…
Then Jiang Cheng is going to have to…
“Well whatever, whatever,” he says hurriedly, turning away to walk towards the main hall. “Do whatever you want.”
It’s not Jiang Cheng’s problem and Jiang Cheng doesn’t care.
He doesn’t.
So what if his stupid brother is stupidly sad? What if it has something to do with his equally stupid husband? Who cares?
Not Jiang Cheng.
Yep.
Jiang Cheng does not care at all.
---
Jiang Cheng successfully spends the whole day not caring about his stupid sad brother and his stupid sad marital problems.
He eats lunch and even dinner with Wei Wuxian and pretends to fall for his stupid ‘I’m totally fine and super happy’ façade. Wei Wuxian is obviously putting in a lot of effort to appear normal. It’s basically a kindness to go along with it.
It is.
Anyway, it isn’t Jiang Cheng’s problem and Jiang Cheng doesn’t care.
So when his head disciple catches him as he’s walking back to his room after dinner and tells him that Hanguang-jun has checked in to a local inn by the piers, Jiang Cheng just waves him off.
Not his problem. He doesn’t care.
He doesn’t care.
Except…
Except it’s very rude of the Lan-er to come to Lotus Pier and not pay respects to the sect leader. Jiang Cheng should probably go and set him straight.
Yeah.
---
Lan-er looks an absolute mess as he opens the door for Jiang Cheng.
His hair is perfect, of course, and his clothes are perfect, of course, and his expression is the same placid expression he always wears, but he looks a mess.
It’s just something about his aura.
He’s obviously torn up about something.
Or maybe Jiang Cheng is projecting – whatever.
“Very rude to come all the way to Lotus Pier without paying respects to the sect leader, don’t you think?” Jiang Cheng asks as he walks into the room. “Even more disrespectful to disregard my hospitality and choose to stay in an inn instead of Lotus Pier.” He sits down at the table and considers whether or not the Lan-er would take offense if he orders some wine.
Lan-er takes a seat across from him, his expression betraying no emotion other than what might be slight annoyance. “Wei Ying wishes to be… alone.” Lan-er’s voice does something strange as he says alone and his brow twitches just bit and it does something strange to his face – it makes him look… like he might be seconds away from bursting into tears.
Fuck Lan-er’s feelings. Jiang Cheng yells for some wine.
“Did he say that? Because he hasn’t really been alone since he’s come here,” Jiang Cheng says, pouring some wine into his cup. “He spent all day with the disciples and he ate lunch and dinner with me.”
Lan-er’s face does something strange again, and he almost – almost – sighs.
“So what you really mean is Wei Wuxian told you not to follow him to Lotus Pier, right?”
Lan-er doesn’t answer but his silence is answer enough for Jiang Cheng. He downs his cup of wine.
This really isn’t his problem.
“What the fuck did you do?” Jiang Cheng asks, and his voice comes out angrier than he means it to.
He’s not angry.
Well…
He shouldn’t be angry.
Because this isn’t his problem… but…
He slams his cup down on the table. “I know that fucking idiot – I can’t think of a thing in this world you could do to make him angry with you, so whatever you did must be pretty bad,” he says.
He can feel hot anger growing in his stomach with every word that comes out of his mouth. His idiot brother thinks that the Lan-er is the best thing since music was first created. The Lan-er could probably tell his stupid brother to cut his hands off and Wei Wuxian would probably do it happily. If Wei Wuxian is upset with the Lan-er…
Upset enough to leave…
Jiang Cheng has to let go of the cup in his hand or risk it shattering. He’s so angry his fingers shake.
“I will personally escort you out of Yunmeng unless you tell me what you did,” he threatens lowly.
Lan-er just looks down at the table and if Jiang Cheng didn’t know better – if Jiang Cheng didn’t know that this was the man who stood against the world with Wei Wuxian – then he would assume that Lan-er didn’t care.
But Jiang Cheng knows better.
The Lan-er has to care. He has to.
He came all the way to Yunmeng and checked into this small inn by the water because he… because he cares.
The Lan-er doesn’t sigh, but he breathes deeply before he opens his mouth.
“I…” he closes his mouth again, his brow furrowing just the slightest bit in frustration. He looks up, and for the first time since Jiang Cheng entered the room, he meets Jiang Cheng’s eyes. “I can’t seem to stop… grieving.”
Jiang Cheng feels the anger in his body leave him in a sudden gush. Confusion rushing in to replace it.
Jiang Cheng just stares at Lan-er.
Lan-er stares back.
Grieving.
Grieving?
What does Lan-er have to grieve?
Jiang Cheng refills his cup with wine and breaks eye contact with the Lan-er. He drinks his wine slowly and breathes. He needs to handle this… carefully. The Lan-er is obviously going through something.
“What the fuck are you talking about?” he asks finally.
Lan-er looks back down to the table and something about his expression lets Jiang Cheng know that Lan-er totally regrets admitting anything to Jiang Cheng. He thinks Jiang Cheng is a fucking idiot. Which isn’t fair because it’s the Lan-er who isn’t making any fucking sense.
Jiang Cheng takes a breath and tries to ask the question again – even more carefully.
“What the fuck, or who the fuck are you grieving? And why is Wei Wuxian upset about it?”
Great job. Jiang Cheng is really good at this. All those years mediating shit for Jin Ling have really paid off.
Lan-er closes his eyes for a moment and breathes out slowly. He opens them and looks back up to meet Jiang Cheng’s gaze.
“I can’t seem to stop grieving Wei Ying,” he says slowly, his gaze steady, his words sure. He says it like it should make sense.
Jiang Cheng fills his cup again and looks at Lan-er in concern. “Wei Wuxian is alive,” he says earnestly, because maybe the Lan-er is going through some mental breakdown. “He’s annoying the shit out of me at Lotus Pier.”
Lan-er shakes his head just the slightest bit. “I understand Wei Ying is alive,” he says, “but… I grieved for him for so long and… and I can’t seem to stop.”
Ah.
Jiang Cheng thinks he can… understand… a little bit.
“You mean you’re scared?” he asks quietly.
Lan-er grimaces just a little, as if Jiang Cheng’s words hit a little too close to home and he nods.
“Wei Ying says it makes him feel lonely. He says that perhaps I’m more in love with his memory than…”
This is so not Jiang Cheng’s problem and way above Jiang Cheng’s pay grade. He doesn’t… Jin Ling’s problems never prepared him for this.
He drinks his cup of wine slowly, to buy some time and to gather some liquid courage.
“Well,” he starts, waving his cup towards Lan-er like it might offer up some answers, “You know, he’s an idiot.”
Lan-er’s expression shutters close. “Wei Ying is not an idiot,” he says tersely.
“He is,” Jiang Cheng replies firmly. “He’s an idiot for sure. And that idiot is at Lotus Pier right now, miserable as hell, because he thinks he might be the reason you might be even a little bit unhappy.”
Lan-er looks up at Jiang Cheng again.
“That idiot is stupidly in love with you. You know that, right?” Jiang Cheng asks. “Knowing him, he’s probably preparing himself to leave you so you can find some greater happiness or something.”
Lan-er’s brows furrow together. “There is no greater happiness than Wei Ying,” he says seriously, as if that isn’t the grossest thing Jiang Cheng has ever heard.
“Don’t tell me that,” Jiang Cheng says with a roll of his eyes, “Go tell Wei Wuxian that!”
“Wei Ying said he wants to be alone,” Lan-er says dejectedly.
Jiang Cheng sighs and refills his cup. He’s well on his way to tipsy now and his tolerance for stupidity is going down with every sip of wine.
“You know he lies, right?” Jiang Cheng asks, “He lies like… all the fucking time.”
Lan-er just stares at him as if Jiang Cheng is speaking in another language.
It’s almost funny.
“He says he’s okay when he’s obviously not, he smiles when he doesn’t feel like smiling,” Jiang Cheng says as examples, “Oh! And you probably didn’t even know he noticed you were grieving until he just blew up about it, right?”
Lan-er nods slowly.
“You get it now? Your stupid husband lies.”
“My husband is not stupid,” Lan-er says.
Jiang Cheng waves it off with his cup of wine, “Yeah, yeah, whatever. What I mean is that Wei Wuxian lied about wanting to be alone. He doesn’t want to be alone – trust me.”
Lan-er just stares at Jiang Cheng, and Jiang Cheng might just be imagining it but it looks like there’s some sort of hopeful light in Lan-er’s eyes – like he might be desperately wanting to believe Jiang Cheng.
He should believe Jiang Cheng. Jiang Cheng is right.
“But I can’t stop grieving,” Lan-er says softly, the hopeful light in his eyes dying.
“Of course you can’t stop grieving,” Jiang Cheng says, and he’s almost done with his bottle of wine at this point. This conversation needs to be over before his wine is done.
Lan-er looks at Jiang Cheng in question. Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes. Wei Wuxian and his husband owe Jiang Cheng so much for this. So. Much
“You love him,” Jiang Cheng says slowly, “You probably love him more than you did twenty years ago. More than you did last year, right?”
Lan-er nods.
“So of course you can’t stop grieving,” Jiang Cheng says, “You’ve already experienced what it’s like to lose him. You can’t stop grieving because your heart is just trying to prepare itself for the worst possible outcome.”
Lan-er lifts a hand to hold over his heart. He doesn’t say anything but he doesn’t look quite convinced.
“Look, your grieving is probably keeping mementos and writing shit down about Wei Wuxian and just trying your best to remember him, right? Trying your best to keep as much of him as you can?”
Lan-er nods slowly, as if he’s a little bit suspicious of how Jiang Cheng might know this. “Did Wei Ying…?”
Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes again. He’s all out of wine and patience. “No,” he says, “that idiot hasn’t said a word to me about your little problem.” He stands then and walks over to the corner where a small satchel is – all the Lan-er brought with him to Yunmeng. “You can’t stop grieving him because you’re so stupidly in love with him that the thought of losing him scares you to fucking death.”
He picks up the satchel and throws it to Lan-er who, annoyingly enough, catches it easily. “Spare my idiot brother a night of misery. Come to Lotus Pier.”
Jiang Cheng walks out the inn, not even bothering to look back to see if the Lan-er will follow. He’s done all he can. If the idiot in white still chooses to stay at the inn, well… Jiang Cheng will chase him out of Yunmeng tomorrow.
---
Lan-er catches up to him about midway to Lotus Pier. He’s quiet and Jiang Cheng feels perfectly content to keep the silence. He feels warm and light from the wine and the night is cool and clear. He feels…
“How did you know the reason for my grieving?” Lan-er says suddenly. It’s unlike him to break the silence first. He must really want to know.
Jiang Cheng has half a mind not to tell him. He sort of wants to keep this to himself. But maybe it’s the wine or the clear night or just his general good mood but…
“I grieve Jin Ling,” he admits lightly. “He was the only family I had after I lost everyone. He was just a little baby; you know? But I was constantly terrified of losing him. Even now, I still have the clothes he used to wear when he was a toddler. I have the first bow I gave him. The first shoes he wore when he could first walk. I remember, I used to just stare at him because I was afraid I might forget what he looked like.”
He doesn’t look at Lan-er as he admits this. And it’s strange to admit this to Lan-er of all people. But… Lan-er can keep a secret – Jiang Cheng knows this. Maybe that’s why he feels safe to admit it.
“Luckily, Jin Ling isn’t a fucking idiot like my brother,” he says, “Jin Ling just thinks I’m a sentimental uncle.”
Lan-er doesn’t say anything in response, but Jiang Cheng finds he doesn’t care.
It’s a strange feeling to learn something new about someone he thought he knew all about, even stranger to learn that someone he thought infallible shares the same fears as him.
It’s… strange.
But under the cool clear skies of Yunmeng, he feels strangely close to Lan-er.
Strange.
#long suffering JC#the untamed#wangxian#mdzs#yunmeng bros#is there a tag for JC and LWJ bonding?#basically just JC learning more about WWX and LWJ as people lol#there's a wangxian centric part to this that I want to finish#and then i'll probably post to ao3
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Hey I love your blog! If it isn’t too much trouble, could you do one of the companions reacting to Sole getting an unsolicited dick pic?
FO4 Companions React to Sole Receiving an Unsolicited Dick Pic
So I know the ask said one of the companions, but I just did 'em all cuz I got carried away (as I always seem to). This was definitely an interesting one to think about, and suuuuper fun to write. Thanks for the ask!
I ended up doing a little scenario at the top that'll apply to all of the reactions, and just kind of give context for the fateful event to take place (since phones/the internet aren't really a canon element in FO, I put this scenario together instead.)
Given the nature of this ask, there's a just bit of NSFW under the cut!
Sole had woken up like any other day. Heading down the stairs of their Diamond City home to make breakfast, trying to be quiet in order to keep from disturbing their companion in the other room. However, as they passed their front door, they noticed something peeking out of the mail slot.
The paper isn't meant to come out until tomorrow...
Curious, Sole reached for the little white square of photo paper, and noticed some writing in the corner. There was an address and the words, "if you like what you see, meet me here tonight," accompanied by a little arrow pointing to flip the photo over. Their intrigue got the better of them, and Sole did as the writing suggested, turning it over for a brief second before immediately regretting it. They recoiled at the phallic image, their surprise evident in the small yelp they uttered in response to the sight before them.
They heard their companion stir from the other room, and then their footsteps sounded from behind as they approached questioningly.
"What have you got there?" They asked.
"Oh, it's nothing," Sole said, turning to face them, "just some mail, is all." Sole's words dripped with distaste, and yet... they felt an overwhelming need to share their unsightly discovery with the person in front of them.
"Wanna see?" They asked, mercilessly turning the picture so their companion could clearly make out the offensive image.
Cait:
*scoffs*
"What, they think that's somethin' te brag about? The damn thing's so wee, I almost couldn't make it out." She'd say with a smile, offering up her hand so she could take the picture and tear it in half. Cait effectively would make the decision for her companion in regards to the comment on the back of the photo. She knows this type of man, and she'd be sure that Sole wouldn't be meeting the asshole anywhere tonight. However, should she be able to sneak away while Sole is sleeping... Cait might just pay a visit to the specified location, where she'd surely give that asshole a piece of her mind, and at least one taste of her fist.
Curie:
Her eyebrows would furrow, and the synth would cock her head to the side in her confusion. Being locked away in a vault with three men for so many years, acting as their doctor, meant she had seen her fair share of the male sex organ. But now, Curie was confused, why did this man feel the need to send Sole a photograph of his penis? Was there something wrong with it? Did he want them to examine it? Sole was not a doctor...
"Why 'ave you received zhis, madame/monsieur? What does zhis man want from you?"
Once Sole explained, Curie would be quite upset by the concept.
"But... you did not ask for zhis, did not want it, and yet, he sent it anyway. Why would you want to meet someone like zhat? It seems very rude to me." She's still confused about it, and may ask a few more questions. Has this happened to Sole before? Does it happen often? Does anyone actually like to see such things when they are unprompted like this? If not, then why do these men continue to do it?
The scientist just wants answers.
Danse:
The soldier would physically recoil at the sight of the photograph, eyebrows raised high as he took in the image, before jerking his head and eyes away from Sole and the picture altogether.
"That-- that is highly inappropriate and an overwhelmingly vile display." He would say once he recovered from his initial shock, still refusing to look back towards Sole, "I suggest you dispose of that filth immediately. Why anyone would reveal themselves in such an unceremonious fashion is beyond me. You would do well to forget such graphic imagery. I know that I will certainly try."
He wouldn't even entertain the idea that Sole would go through with meeting the man behind the picture, but in the off chance that they decided to tell him they wanted to, Danse would spend the remainder of the day convincing them otherwise. He would almost be tempted to go to the location himself in order to lecture the man for his crude and inexcusable behavior, and blatant disrespect to his companion, but in the end, he decides that the man is not worth his time.
Deacon:
Ginger eyebrows would raise slightly over the frames of the glasses for the briefest of moments before he recovered his cool demeanor.
"Ah shoot, did the postman just put it right back into the mail slot? Didn't mean for you to see that, my bad. Here, I'll just deliver it myself."
The sarcasm was evident in his voice as he strode forward and plucked the photo from Sole's hand, examining it for just a moment, and grimacing a bit at the sight.
"Man, Dr. Rich Cockwood does not photograph well. I swear, it's bigger in person." He'd wink at them before glancing down at the picture again, scrutinizing blue eyes pausing to peruse the words on the back as he folded the paper up to put into his pocket. He'd quickly change the subject, trying to keep Sole's mind off the whole thing as he devised a way to sneak out that night and get some intel on the asshole who decided it was a wise idea to put Sole in this position.
Hancock:
*Squints*
"Oh shit. Looks like you've got an admirer there, Sole. " In his sleepy state, it took Hancock a minute to figure out what he was even looking at. Upon realizing that it was, in fact, what he thought it had been, he takes the picture from Sole's grasp and flips it around to glance at the back.
"Look at that, you've even got a date tonight. Must be somewhere romantic, I can tell this guy's old school." He nodded, flipping the photo over to glance once again at the offensive imagery on the front. "Yeah, real traditional, I'd say. Hmm... Mind if I tag along? Could be fun." There was a certain sort of glint in the ghoul's eye that made Sole's spine tingle.
Perhaps neither of us should go... Sole thought, noticing how Hancock's other hand toyed absentmindedly with his combat knife as he furrowed his brows at the photo one last time, before shoving the paper into the pocket of his coat. There was a certain sort of intent behind his actions that made Sole re-think even showing him the image in the first place. Hancock had killed people over less; that, Sole knew for sure.
MacCready:
"Ahh! What the heck are you doing?! I don't need to see that!" He'd squeeze his eyes shut just as soon as he was able to make out the photo, shoving his hands in front of him as though they would be able to push the image out of his mind.
"It's too early for this, what the heck is that guy's problem?" MacCready shuddered as he pulled his hands slowly from where they covered his eyes, glancing quickly at Sole before lowering them down completely, a relieved expression on his face as realized the picture was no longer in his line of sight. Noting his dramatic reaction, Sole considered toying with the mercenary a bit. They asked him what was wrong with the image, stating that perhaps they would pay this man a visit tonight. It had been so long since they had been out on a date, might as well go for it, right?
MacCready's eyes would simultaneously furrow, and widen at their words as he stuttered, finally finding his voice after a moment of shocked, choked silence.
"What?!" He exclaimed, "You're not seriously thinking of going, are you? That guy seems like such an ass-- Well, he just-- I mean..." He took a breath, and Sole had to bite their lip to hold back their grin. "Look, not that it's really any of my business or anything, but... don't you think you could do better than that guy? Like... a lot better?"
Sole couldn't hold back their grin any longer, but MacCready wouldn't meet their gaze. Instead he looked down at the floor, rubbing at the back of his neck with one hand, a nearly unnoticeable blush spreading over his cheeks.
"That guy just seems like a real jerk, and you? Well... Yeah, you deserve better than that, I think." He finished rather awkwardly, finally looking up to meet Sole's gaze before returning their coy smile.
Nick:
The synth would a have a brief moment of raised eyebrows as he took in the details of the photograph, and then the inevitable scowl of disappointment would spread across his face.
"You know, you'd think this guy would understand that no one in their right mind wants to see that particular... angle. You don't think that's his good side, do ya?" Sole would smile a bit at that, and as the synth turned to walk away from the offensive image, they told him about the writing on the back.
"Hey now, wait a minute. You're not thinking of paying this guy a visit, are ya? If so, that's a pretty poor decision on your part, I think."
Sole would shake their head, telling Nick not to worry as he fixed his inquiring yellow gaze on them. He nodded in response, seeming satisfied by their answer. In the next moment, a thought seemed to claim his attention.
"Hmm... I think I might just know the perp, actually. Ellie's got a few reports back at the office mentioning some similar events. Guess it's possibly one of the guards on night duty who goes around with these to see if he gets any takers."
Sole almost spoke up, but as they opened their mouth, Nick's words seemed to take their idea straight from their head. "On second thought..." He said, "You got any plans for this evening?"
Piper:
"Ahh! Blue! Why would you show me that!?" She'd physically cover her eyes with her hands, taking a few steps back and away from the picture for good measure.
"Look, I don't care what you do with it," she'd tell them, "just don't let me see it again!"
Sole would thankfully oblige, but before disposing of the image, they showed Piper the writing on the back. At the sight of the man's suggestion, Piper snatched the photo from Sole's hand, glaring at it furiously.
"Ohhhh no he doesn't. If he's sent crap like this to anybody else, I'm going to make sure no one falls for this."
And Piper kept her word, as the next morning's addition of Publik Occurrences contained a small piece written on exactly this subject, titled: To the Asshole who sent the Sad Little Picture to a Disgusted Citizen; No One Wants to See That! Sincerely, Everyone who has.
Preston:
"O-- oh! Um, that's-- okay. That's just wrong. Do you want me to get rid of it for you?"
Preston's face would wrinkle up in his clear distaste before bringing a a hand up to shield his eyes. When Sole had lowered the picture, he removed his hand, and looked them in the eye, refusing to pay the photo any more attention, but extending his hand out to take it from them so he could dispose of it properly.
"Are you... okay? I can't believe how rude some people are. Who would want to see that?" He'd flash a sympathetic smile at them, as he folded up the photo and prepared to throw it away. He didn't read the back himself, but if they told him about the words that were written there, he wouldn't even entertain the idea of Sole going, just shaking his head in disappointment at the man's poor and rude way of trying in vain to woo his General.
"Some people... The nerve. If you don't mind me saying, General, you deserve much better than that anyway."
X6-88:
His eyes would be locked to Sole's, but as they presented the photo to him, his gaze would fall to the image, and an ever so slight furrowing of his brows would take place above his silver eyes. A brief moment would pass, and X6's gaze would be back on his companion's face.
"Ma'am/ sir, why did you feel the need to show me this?" He's also quite confused, this was not a common occurrence in the Institute, and once Sole gave him an explanation, his expression would remain blank. For the most part, anyway. A small huff of laughter would escape him, prompting Sole to be the one giving him the questioning look now.
"If this filthy wastelander believes he can disrespect the future director of the Institute without facing consequences, he is sorely mistaken." He said, his gaze unbroken as he made Sole this promise, "Don't worry, I will take care of this filth at the specified meeting time and location. You will not hear from him again."
He doesn't necessarily intend to kill the man for his unseemly behavior; X6 is a courser after all, and he knew this man would be scared shitless if X6 were to so much as look at him the wrong way, but should the man make any... poor decisions in response to the courser's confrontation, well... certainly X6 can't be held responsible for the behavior, or the fate, of a mere stranger now, could he? Especially after his heinous actions.
#fallout#fallout companions#fallout companions reacts#fallout companions reactions#fallout 4#fallout 4 companions#fallout 4 companions reactions#fallout 4 companions reacts#fo4#fo4 companions#cait fo4#curie fo4#paladin danse#danse fo4#fallout danse#deacon fo4#john hancock#hancock fo4#fo4 maccready#rj maccready#robert joseph maccready#nick valentine#fo4 nick valentine#piper wright#piper fo4#preston garvey#fo4 preston#x6 88#fallout x6 88#sole survivor
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A/N: This is literally the first NSFW anything I've written, so PLEASE let me know what you think! I'd love to improve in any way I can. No real warnings apply to this, there's some light bondage, degradation- nothing too crazy.
~~~~~
The heels of your boots clicked down the hall of the dungeons, matching the pace of your racing heart while you made your way to Professor Snape's office for the sixth night this week. You could have sworn that he was making up work for you to do as a small way of torturing you for merely existing. But you had decided that you would not give up, not this far into working with the potions master. This was your second year as his assistant at Hogwarts and it was already proving to be harder than the last.
The school year started nearly a month ago. At first, he ignored you much to your chagrin. You thought that after the events of last year, you had finally moved past him brushing you off and sneering at you. That maybe your working relationship could now at least be civilized. You shuddered at the thought of last year - images of Severus limping into your office one night with desperation in his eyes. You had stood from your desk, looking down to see a gash across his leg that was bleeding profusely. You still weren't sure why he hadn't gone straight to Madame Pomfrey to tend his injuries after he had thrown himself in front of Professor Lupin when he had tried to attack students as a werewolf. You tenderly treated his wound with healing magic, potions and salves before finally helping him to your bed. You stayed up all night monitoring him - you knew he would be fine, but you worried.
After that, he had acted kinder towards you. It was his way of thanking you. But then you left for the summer break and everything had returned to normal when you arrived two weeks before term started. Determined to break through his rough exterior and see that side of him again, you had decided to keep pressing him, continued to be kind to him. You were resolved to become his respected colleague. You hoped to be his friend. And the butterflies you got when touching him, lightly caressing his thigh as you applied a healing salve to avoid scarring - the small grunts he made that didn't entirely sound like they were from pain - electricity shot down your spine and to your core... Maybe you wanted to break through to him in deeper ways. But he hadn't acknowledged anything that passed between you, and now you were back to square one.
Until you had called him out in front of the second years in class six days ago. He had disrespected you in front of them and you had hit your boiling point. His eyes turned black, angry, and he dismissed the glass with a low and dangerous "Get. Out." He brushed passed you then, storming out of the classroom leaving you to clean up and teach the next class. You received an owl at dinner that night with a letter scrawled out to you.
My office, 7:00. Do not be late.
And it had been so every night since - except tonight. Tonight, the note said to arrive at 9:00. So you did, at 9:00pm sharp, and entered the open door to his office with your shoulders back, chin high. Whatever tedious task you were assigned tonight would be done without complaint.
"Shut the door," Snape said without looking up from the homework on his desk.
You did as requested and approached his desk quietly. Sat in the chair across from him. Waited.
"Sir?"
Nothing. You sighed and sat back in your chair, crossing your legs. His eyes snapped up from his grading at the sound and lingered on your face before his gaze slowly went down to your chest, your legs, then back up again.
"It's rude to stare, sir," you leaned forward again and propped your elbows on his desk and smirked. "What do you require of me tonight?"
"I would like," he finally replied, "for you to transfer the ingredients from those jars to those jars." He waved at the ingredients across his office and resumed grading the papers. You scoffed and didn't move.
"I believe that is all the instruction you require, is it not, Miss Y/N?"
"Yes sir."
"And are you incapable of standing to complete this task?"
"No sir."
"Then why are you. still. sitting. here?" Each word punctuated, venomous.
"Because this is a foolish task, Professor." You had spent the past six nights completing similar tasks, and when you had finished one there was another one lined up. It was a waste of time. "Do you not think that I am more than capable of assisting elsewhere?"
Snape slammed his hands on his desk and stood up, the legs of his chair scraping the floor as it flew back.
"Do not speak out of turn! It may have escaped your notice, but you are my assistant, you are here to assist me." His brows were furrowed together and he leaned over his desk towards you.
"That may be true, sir, but it may have escaped your notice that I am qualified to do more than just silly tasks to pass the time. Why do you insist that I am here as just some fucking girl that you can ogle and abuse your power on. Does the potions master title feed your ego that much, that you feel the need to degrade me at every chance you get?"
Snape's eyes turned dark with anger as you spoke, but you didn't give a shit. You were tired of this, past your limits of what you could take and still respect yourself. If he wasn't willing to work with you, respect you enough to lend you even a speck of decency, then you didn't know where you were going with this. When you were finished talking, he recoiled away from you with a look of disgust.
"That you have the audacity," Snape replied with a low voice, his fingers dragging on his desk as he began walking around it, "to speak to me in such a way-"
"The same could be said for you, Professor," you cut him off. You lifted your chin into the air as you held his eye contact, but backed away as he got closer to you. With every step you took back, he followed.
"You insolent little witch!" Snape leaned down to your eye level as he spoke. "Always parading around like you own the place, demanding more respect when you have not earned it!"
"Have I not?! I've been working as your assistant for a year now, and yet you still treat me like a bug on the bottom of your shoe. And after I helped you last year, I thought-"
"Thought what, exactly? That I would bow to you, my savior?"
"No. That maybe things would change, that you would be able to acknowledge whatever this tension is between us because I know that there is more to it than just disdain. And you are too cowardly to admit it." You took another step back, turning to the door. "Fuck you, Severus. I don't know why I've bothered."
You reached the door and opened it, prepared to exit, but you heard his footsteps approach you quickly. His hand reached around your head and slammed the door shut, the other arm coming around your other side to lock it. You were pinned in between him and the door, heart beating in your throat, and you spun to face him. He leaned down once again to eye level. You could feel his hot breath against your neck and the smell of him... Merlin, did he smell divine.
"Fuck you, she says. Yes, that's exactly it, isn't it? Don't you dare act as though I am the only one ogling here, Y/N. Yes, I heard those filthy thoughts when you mended my leg. I felt your desperation seeping from you." He stood straight then and grasped the back of your neck, dragging you beside him back to his desk. "Every day I must suffer those thoughts."
He shoved you towards the desk and spun you around, facing away from him. His hand pushed you down so your face was pressed into the cool wood.
"Is this what you want, Y/N?" He pressed himself into your behind and you could feel his length against you. "Is this what you have been so desperate for?" You tried to stand back up but he pushed you down again. His belt rattled as he took it off, as he tied your hands with it behind your back.
"So desperate for my approval, my respect, my cock." He chuckled lowly. You felt your skirt being lifted, exposing your ass to him. Heat rose in your face. "Just lovely," he praised as his calloused hand rubbed the now exposed skin, "and all for me."
He leaned down to your ear and whispered, "Count."
You tried to turn back to look at him, to ask what he meant, when his hand came down and made sharp contact with your skin.
"Severus, please," you yelped as his hand came down again.
"Count!"
"One," slap.
"Two," slap.
"This is what disrespectful witches deserve," he sneered at you as his hand came down again and again. By the tenth slap you were whimpering. "Enjoying this, are we?"
Snape pulled you up by the belt just enough for him to reach around and rip open the buttons of your blouse. His hand went under your bra and pulled your breasts out before he roughly pinched your nipples between his thumb and forefinger. He pulled you up some more, giving him leverage to reach around to your heat. His fingers slipped between your folds and began rubbing circles around your clit.
"Already so wet for me," he whispered into your ear. He nibbled at your neck and earlobe. "I need you to tell me you want this."
You nodded eagerly, but it wasn't enough. He pinched your nipple hard.
"Use your words."
"Yes, please."
"Please what?"
"Please, sir."
He pushed you back down onto the desk and lined himself up with your entrance before pushing his cock in, not giving you time to adjust to his length. You both let out a low moan as he slowly pulled back out, quickly plunged back in.
"My little slut," he grunted as he pushed all the way into your dripping cunt. "You belong to me."
"Yes, sir."
"Tell me."
"I belong to you." You breathed out. With every pump, your hips hit against the desk and you let out a cry of pain and pleasure. Severus splayed his fingers in your hair before grabbing onto a handful and pulling it. His his snapped into you, quicker and quicker.
"So tight for such a little slut," grunted out between thrusts. "Is this what you wanted? Taking my cock on my desk, writhing under me."
You moaned back in response, feeling yourself getting close. Teetering on the edge of coming, you clenched around him.
"You don't come until I say you can come, do you understand?"
"Yes, sir."
You struggled not to as his breathing became erratic as his hips kept snapping against you, his balls slapping against the back of your thighs. He once again reached around to rub circles around your clit. Your hands grasped the edge of the desk, knuckles turning white as you groaned from the pleasure. His low moans filled the air, making you throb on his dick even more, your body threatening to tumble over the edge. The heat was rising in your core, the familiar feeling becoming overwhelming.
"Come for me," he demanded. Your body pulsed with the waves of your orgasm as you climaxed, your walls slamming down around his cock. You cried out with each wave of pleasure.
"Fuck, Severus!"
"What a good little whore, coming all over my cock," he praised you as you came down from your climax. He kept pumping into you but you could feel he was close.
He pulled out of you after a few more thrusts, pulled on the belt around your hands and dragged you to the floor. He pumped his cock in one hand, the other on the desk behind you, before streams of cum shot out onto your face and dropped down onto your chest. He tucked himself back into his pants before wiping up his cum with his thumb and wiping it along the inside of your bottom lip, marking you.
"Clean yourself up and get out. I will see you tomorrow night at 9:00."
#snape fic#snape#severus x reader#severus snape#dom snape#snape smut#harry potter#professor snape#snape x reader#degrading kink
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boyfriend - bucky barnes x y/n
"I love everything about you girl, don't you understand? I love you from head to toe girl, but I hate your boyfriend" - boyfriend: lou bega yes mambo no. 5 lou bega
Plot: Bucky is in love with his best friend Y/N. But unfortunately, his best friend has a boyfriend, and Bucky hates his guts. Warnings: Alcohol, some violence (but no abuse) and a small mention of sex. Also a small spoiler for TFATWS finale - just Sam's new job. Notes: So, my first Bucky fic is here! I've loved this song for a long time, and I listened to it again last week, and this fic was born. I recommend you listen to the song, because it's so upbeat and catchy, and I've tried to reflect that in this fic by making it more funny than angsty...but there is some angst ;) Oh also, Lou keeps calling the girl darling in the song, which is definitely a thing Bucky would do I think.
Also this is at least 7k words, probably even more. So sit back, relax and enjoy!
As Bucky Barnes watches his best friend Y/N sing to herself as she moves around her apartment, he smiles. The two of them have been friends for almost two years by this point, and hang out together almost every day. And for almost two years, Bucky Barnes has been head over heels in love with her. He loves everything about her: her smile, how gorgeous she looks, her sunny disposition, the way she’s the only one who can cheer him up after a nightmare...and so on and so forth. Y/N comes and sits beside him on the couch, grinning. “What are you thinking about?” She asks.
“Oh nothing.” He lies. Of course, he knows he can’t tell her that he’s in love with her. Especially since he knows there’s no way she feels the same about him. Before Y/N can reply, there’s a knock at the door, and she springs up to answer it.
“Sean! Hey!” She grins, pecking him on the lips and leading him inside, her arm wrapped around his waist. “Bucky! You remember my boyfriend Sean, right?” She asks.
“Yes, I do. Hey Sean.” He gives him a small wave from his position on the couch, which Sean returns, before being led into the kitchen by Y/N. Once they’re out of sight, Bucky’s smile falls. Sean is the big reason why he can’t tell Y/N that he’s in love with her. He might not know much about love, given he’s over a hundred years old, but he does know that you can’t tell people things like that and destroy their happiness, even if he wishes it was him she was with. Everytime he’s around, or even when she talks about him, a big grin is present on her face. And it tears him apart inside. But despite how happy she is around him, and how he knows that her happiness is all that matters, Bucky can’t stand Sean at all.
It’s not even just because he’s dating the girl he’s been in love with from the moment he met her. Bucky just...gets bad vibes from him, and doesn’t trust him as far as he can throw him (which, considering his metal arm, is quite far actually). He can’t explain why he dislikes him so much, he just does. And because of that, he refuses to get to know Sean any more than he has to, despite Y/N’s wishes for them to both get along. He knows it breaks her heart, but he can’t help it. He got through the last eighty or so years of his life trusting only himself, and isn’t about to stop now. But, his distrust of Sean for no reason is still confusing to him, so he decides he has to get to the bottom of it.
So, as soon as he can, Bucky visits another friend of his and Y/N’s.
~*~*~*~*~
“No, I cannot send Red Wing after her boyfriend to spy on him. Are you insane?! I thought all that mindless killing and spy stuff was behind you?” Sam asks.
“Okay first of all, ouch, and secondly, it is. I just hate HIM. I don’t trust him one bit.”
“Well...is he hurting her? Do you think she’s in danger?” Mulling it over, Bucky shakes his head.
“No. I just....think he’s weird and gross. He just...I don’t know! I just don’t like him Sam, is that really a big issue?!”
“It is when you’re trying to send The Avengers after him! And besides, if she’s not being hurt, there’s nothing we can do.” Huffing, Bucky rolls his eyes. “Why don’t you just spend time with him?” Sam asks. “I mean, you don’t like him, but Y/N has clearly got her heart set on this man, so there’s got to be something you’re missing. Maybe that robot brain of yours needs re-working.”
“Well, he did ask if I wanted to hang out, maybe get some coffee together a few weeks ago. And it’d make Y/N happy if we hung out more...” He trails off, and Sam starts nodding.
“See! You’re right! And after all, as long as Y/N’s happy, that’s all that matters...right Bucky?” Bucky is silent for a while, and Sam almost makes another crack at how he can hear the gears turning in his robot brain, but Bucky soon speaks up.
“Okay, I’ll do it.” Sam starts grinning. “But I uh...I’ll need some moral support there. Some help...guy to guy, you know.” Sam’s grin immediately disappears.
“Ohhh no. No no no. I am not getting dragged into this. Whatever’s between you and this dude is your business. I want no part of this.”
“Come on Sam! Please?!” Bucky asks. “That way you can see that it’s not just all in my head. I’m not wrong, I promise. You can trust my judgement.”
“Ah yes, because your judgement has been so great before...” Sam mumbles, but Bucky doesn’t respond to that.
“And after all, I think it’s an important part of my therapy, you know, making new friends and all that. I’m sure both the doc and Y/N will be pleased to hear that.” Sam shakes his head.
“I don’t care, I’m still not getting dragged into this.”
~*~*~*~*~
“I hate you.” Sam whispers, glaring at Bucky from across the Starbucks table. Bucky ignores him, and stares out the window, looking for Sean. “I cannot believe you dragged me into this.” Sam continues to complain.
“Shut up Sam.” Bucky orders, continuing to stare out the window.
“Oh, you’re going to be like that? You know Bucky, it’s really rude-“ Bucky suddenly sits up straighter, seeing Sean walking through the door.
“Shut up Sam.”
“Hey! You don’t- ouch!” Sam gasps as Bucky’s foot makes a connection with his ankle in an attempt to shut him up. “Thank god his foot’s not made of vibranium...” Sam hisses.
“Sean! Over here!” Bucky calls, waving him over as Sam rubs his ankle, continuing to glare at Bucky. Sean heads over to the table and sits down, greeting Bucky with a smile and a hello. Then he notices Sam beside him.
“Oh my god, hi! You’re Sam, right? It’s really nice to meet you. I’m a big fan of Captain America.” He gasps, holding out his hand, which Sam shakes, clearly happy with the attention. Bucky suppresses a groan, knowing Sam will not shut up about this, and will think Sean is great, no matter what he says. “Gotta admit, I didn’t expect to have you join us, but I’m glad you’re here.”
“Yeah, well...I was in the neighbourhood, so.....Bucky invited me to join you both.” Sam lies, giving Bucky a hard stare.
“Well I’m glad you’re here. Both of you. You seem to know her really well, so I’m glad to hang out with you both.” Sean grins, ignoring or failing to notice the tension between Sam and Bucky. “She talks about you both a lot, actually.”
“Oh she does? You know, she talks about you a lot too. It’s nice to finally meet you man.” The pair turn their eyes to Bucky, who still hasn’t said anything, and continues fixing his gaze on Sean.
“Um, hi Bucky. It’s nice to see you again. How have you been?” Sean asks, suddenly looking like he’d rather be anywhere but here.
“Good.” Bucky responds, continuing his staring. Sean’s face flushes.
“Does he uh...does he always stare like this?” Sean whispers to Sam, clearly loud enough for Bucky to hear.
“Yup. All the time. I wouldn’t worry about it too much. He does it to me too. It means he likes you.” Sam lies. Sean starts smiling.
“Oh, it does? That’s good then! Right, I’ll get the drinks then. What are you guys having?” He asks, heading up to the counter after both pass on their orders. As soon as he’s out of earshot, Sam rounds on Bucky.
“What the hell is wrong with you? You’re going to frighten the poor guy to death.” Sam hisses.
“Well, he’s weird right? Something’s off with him. He just doesn't seem genuine.” Bucky fires back. Sam frowns.
“No! He’s been nothing but polite, and you’re staring at him like you’re in Winter Soldier kill mode. Wait, you’re not actually in that...mode are you? You’re not gonna hurt him, right Bucky?”
“Depends how the rest of this goes.” Bucky keeps a close eye on Sean as he waits for the drinks to be made. But so far, Sean seems to be doing nothing wrong or weird, and for a split second, Bucky wonders if he’s the one in the wrong, and that he’s just misguided. That is however, until Sean notices a pretty auburn haired woman is in front of him in line, and Bucky thinks he notices him look down towards her butt. Okay he’s definitely looking at her butt. His gaze lingers for a little while, and Bucky feels the rage building up in him. How could he disrespect Y/N like that? A girl just as beautiful, actually more beautiful than the one in front of him, and yet he disrespects her like this? “See?! He just started staring at her ass!” Bucky hisses, and Sam glances up from his phone, looking over.
“I don’t see anything.” He shrugs, going back to his phone. Bucky huffs.
“Are you serious? You barely looked! And that’s not an okay thing for him to do! I’m going to say something.”
“No. No you aren’t.” Sam orders. “You have no way to tell if that’s even what he did. And even if it was, you are not confronting him in a public Starbucks. Remember what happened last time everyone saw you fighting people?” He asks, and Bucky is immediately reminded of his face all over the news when people thought he killed King T’Chaka, and during the bar fight in Madripoor, when everyone was filming him, ready to post about how dangerous he was all over the internet. Even though he hates to admit it, Sam is right. Making this whole thing public was not a good choice. ...That doesn’t mean he can’t do it in private though. “Listen Bucky, I don’t get why you hate this guy so much, and sure, if he’s really rude or gross, I’d get it. But I’m telling you, I just don’t see it. And in the nicest way, I think you’re just grasping at straws here.” For a second, Bucky considers launching Sam’s phone across the room, and making him look at Sean so he could see what he does, but decides that’s probably not the best thing to do. Stay low and all that. “Now. We’re going to have a nice coffee with Sean, and you’re not going to antagonise him. Right Bucky?” Bucky shakes his head. There was no way in hell he’s going to agree with that. Sam sighs.
“Why are you being like this? Y/N is someone I care about a lot, and I know you care about her too, so why won’t you listen to me and trust me on this?!” Bucky asks, and Sam raises an eyebrow.
“Of course I care about her Buck, but I think you’re going too far with this, and I’m worried it’s going to hurt her in the long run. Trust me on this. This kind of thing never ends well.” Bucky scoffs, and is about to say that he’s not going too far at all, and if Sam just listened and watched, he’d understand where he was coming from. But before he can open his mouth, Sean comes back, carrying a tray with their drinks and some snacks.
“Hey, sorry about your wait. It took longer than expected. I know you guys didn’t ask for them, but I got some cakes too. Y/N told me that you guys love them, so I thought I’d get them too.” He laughs awkwardly, still clearly intimidated by Bucky.
“You did? Well thank you Sean. Isn’t that nice Bucky?” Sam asks, giving Bucky a look.
“Thanks.” Bucky hisses, glaring down at the cake pop on the tray. Sean starts smiling. He’s right, he does like them...just when Y/N buys them for him though. And even though Sam was right about not confronting him in public, that doesn’t mean Bucky has to eat the cake. “I’m not hungry though.” Sean’s face falls, and Sam sighs, rolling his eyes.
“Oh, well...you can eat it later, right?” Sean asks.
“Mhm.” Bucky gives a tiny nod, making Sean look even more scared. Noticing this look and trying desperately to avoid the impending catastrophe, Sam starts up a conversation with Sean, whilst Bucky drinks his coffee and pipes up every so often with a grunt or a nod.
After a while, mostly filled with conversations between Sam and Sean and complete silence from Bucky, Sam gets up to go to the toilet. As he leaves, Sam gives Bucky a look, clearly pleading with him not to launch Sean through the window while he’s away. Bucky rolls his eyes and gestures for Sam to just go, which he does..whilst keeping his eyes on them the entire way there.
“So...” Sean trails off, laughing awkwardly.
”Let me get one thing clear.” Bucky says, and Sean audibly gulps, clearly startled. Bucky leans forward, and Sean immediately looks like he’s about to shit himself in fear. “Y/N means a lot to me. And if you do ANYTHING to hurt her, you will have me to deal with. You understand?” He hisses. Sean nods, still looking startled. “Say it.”
“Y-Yes Bucky...” He stammers out.
“Good. And let me tell you. Don’t think you can just...stare at other girls without repercussions. It wont end well, trust me.”
“But I didn’t...” He begins, and Bucky gives him another glare. He can see the guilt written all over his face. “Anyway. As long as you remember that, that’s all that matters.” He leans back into his seat, and takes another sip of his coffee. The pair sit in silence until Sam returns.
“Hey guys, I didn’t miss much did I? You’re both okay, right?”
“Yup.” Bucky and Sean say at the same time. Sam looks surprised by this, but smiles, clearly happy that Sean hasn’t been launched through the Starbucks window, even though that’s still what Bucky wanted to do.
~*~*~*~*~
After the trio are finished in Starbucks, they stand outside to say their goodbyes. Well. Two of them do at least. “Well, bye guys, it was uh...nice to see you both.” Sean forces a smile, clearly trying to not anger Bucky even more.
“Yeah it was fun! Hopefully we can do this again.” Sam grins, clearly not noticing the awkwardness between them both, or ignoring it. Sean grimaces, and walks away from the pair. Sam waves him off.
“I don’t get why you like him so much.” Bucky sighs, starting to walk back towards his apartment, closely accompanied by Sam, who’s still grinning.
“At first I didn’t understand why you don’t like him, but I think I do now. I realised it when I was in the bathroom.”
“Well, that is where you do most of your thinking.” Bucky counters, rolling his eyes. He already told him why he didn’t like Sean. In his eyes, there wasn’t much else to think about. Sam ignores the dig, and continues:
“It’s because you have a crush on Y/N, isn’t it?” Bucky stops in his tracks, turning towards Sam.
“Uh no, I don’t. Who says I do?!” Bucky lies. Sam’s grin grows even wider.
“Oh yes you DO Bucky. I can’t believe I didn’t notice it before. It’s SO obvious!” Even though he tries desperately to stop it, Bucky feels his cheeks flush. Sam picks up on this immediately. “Ha! I knew it! You like her. I mean, I should’ve noticed sooner, with the way you look at her, and the way you speak about her.”
“Sam, can you shut up?” Bucky hisses. “Please.” Sam’s face softens. “Yes..I like her. I think she’s the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen, and I’m so glad to be her friend. But that is NOT why I hate Sean. I don’t care who Y/N is with, as long as she’s happy and they treat her well, and I'm worried he isn't going to.” Bucky feels his heart sink as he says that he doesn’t care who she’s with. Of course, he wants it to be him more than anything...but life doesn’t always work out like that. After all, it had treated him so shittily in the past, there’s no way it would also give him the girl of his dreams. Bucky had learned a long time ago that his dreams weren’t meant to come true. But despite that, if he was destined to just be Y/N’s friend, that was okay with him.
“I’m sorry Bucky.” Sam says, sounding genuine. He reaches over and gives Bucky a pat on the back. “For what it’s worth, despite me not seeing Sean the way you do, your support and love for Y/N is really admirable, and shows how good a guy you are. I hope you find love and happiness with someone, even if it’s not with Y/N.”
“Thanks Sam.” Bucky gives a soft smile. He knows he doesn’t deserve it, but it was still nice to hear. The pair resume walking towards Bucky’s apartment.
“I will say though, you gotta work on your anger issues.”
“I don’t have anger issues.”
“...Yeah you do. I saw the way you looked at him. Anyway, I know the best way to do that...video games at your place.”
“Why is it always my place?”
“It’s nice, and you have better games than I do. I have Y/N to thank for that.” Sam walks on ahead, and Bucky rolls his eyes. Even though Sam sometimes gets on his nerves, he’s still incredibly glad to have him as a friend. Even when he eats all the food in his fridge.
~*~*~*~*~
The duo soon arrive at Bucky’s apartment, and are midway through a game of Mario Kart when they’re interrupted by the sound of banging on Bucky’s door. Pausing the game, Sam and Bucky exchange a cautious look as they slowly move towards the door, not wanting to be surprised by something that could be The Avengers’ newest threat. That is however, until a voice sounds through the door:
“JAMES BUCHANAN BARNES, I KNOW YOU’RE IN THERE!” Y/N calls. “I NEED TO TALK TO YOU.”
“Ooh, full name. You’re fucked.” Sam says, clearly trying not to laugh. Bucky glares at him, before steeling himself and opening the door. Y/N stands there, her arms folded and a glare on her face. “Oh she looks like you when she glares.” Sam whispers loud enough for just Bucky to hear.
“Um...hey Y/N.” Bucky gives her a small wave.
“Don’t ‘hey Y/N’ me asshole. I need to talk to you.” She orders, walking into the apartment. “Oh, hi Sam. Can I speak to Bucky please? Alone?” She asks, almost hissing the words.
“Don’t have to tell me twice.” Sam responds, holding his hands up in surrender and leaving the room, taking a bowl of M&Ms with him. As soon as the door clicks shut behind Sam, Y/N unleashes her anger on Bucky.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” She asks. For a second, Bucky almost responds with ‘many, many things’ but he realises that might be the wrong thing to say. Y/N does not look like she can handle jokes right now. “Sean told me about your coffee date. I know you’re not the best person with socialising but GOD Bucky, are you even trying to be civil to him?”
“Doll, listen...” Bucky begins, but she cuts him off.
“Nope. Nuh uh. You do not get to call me that right now. And I’m not even finished speaking.” Bucky takes the hint and shuts up. “Everytime he speaks, or even breathes, you look like you want to wring his neck!”
“No I don’t!”
“Yes you do! I’ve seen it! And not even that, you THREATENED HIM!”
“Hey, I’m just being protective of you!” Bucky defends, trying not to feel bad. This is their first fight...ever, and he hates it. Especially because he’s trying to protect Y/N, and she just won’t listen.
“That’s not being protective! That’s being weird and creepy!”
“Exactly what I said!” Sam calls from the other room.
“Thanks Sam.” Bucky and Y/N say in unison. They both look at each other, the argument the last thing on their minds. “...Jinx.” Bucky whispers, smiling. For a second, a smile creeps its way onto Y/N’s face, and Bucky feels hopeful that they can have a civil conversation. But then, Y/N clearly remembers where she is, and the smile falls.
“Bucky...please don’t do that. Please don’t.” She pleads. She looks sad to be fighting with him, and Bucky feels a pang in his chest. Both about their fight, and about what he needs to tell her.
“I’m sorry d-Y/N.” He quickly clarifies. He takes a seat on his couch, beckoning for her to join him, which she does. He takes her hands in his, gently running his thumb over her knuckles with his non metal hand. “It may seem like I’ve been too hard on Sean, but trust me, I do have my reasons.” Y/N frowns, and Bucky continues. “When we were out...I saw him staring at another girl. He definitely stared at her butt. And because I care about you, I wanted him to know that wasn’t acceptable, and if he hurts you, he’ll have to answer to me.” Y/N is silent for a few seconds, frowning as she takes it all in. Bucky waits patiently, waiting to support her when she needs it. Finally, she speaks.
“Oh my god...” She begins. But just as Bucky is about to comfort her, she finishes her sentence. “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.” She scoffs. Bucky starts frowning, and before he can speak, Y/N stands up, pulling her hands out of his grasp. “I can’t believe you Bucky. First you threaten my boyfriend, and now you stoop so low to make up lies about him! I know you don't like him, but even so, that's no excuse.”
“B-But I didn’t! I saw it!” Bucky stammers, quickly getting up.
“Oh you did, did you? Did you also see a unicorn? Did you see a flying pig? Come on Bucky, just tell me the truth. You didn’t see those things because they don’t exist. I know he wouldn’t do that to me.”
“...And you don’t trust me?” He asks.
“I thought I did, but I don’t know if I can anymore.” She replies. Bucky swears he feels his heart shatter in that moment. A mixture of anger and pain begin to build in his stomach, and he feels tears welling up in his eyes. “I know. Why don’t we ask Sam what he saw?” She asks, walking towards the room. Bucky gasps, trying to reach out and stop her.
“No...no you don’t have to.” Scoffing, she turns around.
“Why? Because he didn’t see it?” She asks. Instead of letting him answer, she opens the door to a startled Sam, still clutching the bowl. “Sam. Did you see what Bucky said he saw? Did Sean cheat on me with a girl in Starbucks?”
“Well, I personally didn’t see it, but-“
“And that’s all I need.” Y/N sighs. She turns back to Bucky, her eyes shimmering with tears. “Just...I don’t know what I can say to you.” She sniffles. “I thought you were my friend.”
“Doll, I am, I swear-“
“I SAID DON’T CALL ME THAT!” She snaps, tears spilling from her eyes. “I...I need to go. Sean’s waiting on me. Just. Leave us alone please. I can’t be friends with you if you can’t respect me and my relationship. If you want to apologise, you know where to find me.” She starts walking towards the front door.
“Wait.” Bucky gasps, and Y/N stops in her tracks. “Please believe me Y/N. I wouldn’t lie to you about this.” She stays silent. “Please Y/N.” Bucky repeats, moving closer towards her. When he sees he’s getting no response, he feels the anger rising. “I’m not apologising for being right!” He says louder than he expected to. Y/N sniffles again, and Bucky immediately regrets his tone.
“Well....I guess this is goodbye then.” Y/N says, and Bucky can hear her start to cry. ”Goodbye Bucky. Bye Sam.” Without another word, she opens the door of Bucky’s apartment and leaves, closing the door behind her.
Bucky stands there for what feels like an eternity, just staring at the door. Part of him knows he should run after her, but it feels like his feet are rooted to the ground. So instead, he stands there, waiting for the slim chance of her coming back. At this point, he doesn’t even care who’s right or wrong...he just wants to apologise to her and have her back in his life. As time goes on, he slowly starts to accept she’s not coming back. When he said he felt his heart shatter before, this feels like the tiny shards were stabbing him, and piercing every part of him. And despite everything Bucky has been through, the fights, the torture, the nightmares...this pain hurts more than anything he’s ever experienced in his life.
“Bucky...” He registers Sam’s voice from beside him, but can’t even say anything back to him. “Are you....are you alright?” Sam asks. Bucky can tell from his voice that he knows he’s asking a dumb question. How the hell could anyone be okay after an argument like that? But he knows that Sam’s a therapist, and that’s what they do. His own doc would do the same. But the question still made him realise that he is definitely not okay. A tear falls from his eyes and rolls down his cheek, and Bucky says the only thing he’s able to say.
“I’ve lost her forever Sam.”
~*~*~*~*~
In the weeks after his argument with Y/N, Bucky has become even more reclusive than he is usually. He barely leaves his apartment, only venturing outside to go to his appointments or to get food. Aside from seeing his doctor and occasionally replying to Sam’s texts, he has no other social interactions. Y/N was his everything: his best friend...actually, his only friend, and one of the only girls he’s ever loved. And now, she was gone. And it was like Bucky’s happiness and joy for life left with her. After all, she was usually the reason why he was happy. Well...the only reason.
But he doesn’t judge her for being upset at him. Bucky has started to blame himself for what happened. Maybe he had seen things that didn’t exist, or taken things the wrong way. All he wants to do is go over to Y/N’s apartment, apologise to her and get her back. He doesn’t even care about being with her, he just wants to be her friend again. Unfortunately, Bucky is far too scared to do it. The last time they saw each other was filled with so much pain and tears, he didn’t want to put them both through that again. That and he was terrified it wouldn’t work out, and that he’d never see her again. So instead, he did nothing. He felt horrible about it, but he knew it was the best option, and nobody else would get hurt.
However, one day, Bucky has decided he’s fed up with being stuck in his apartment, and chooses to go for a walk. Once he is outside, he walks towards the park. As he walks, he takes a deep breath, enjoying the fresh air and the sun on his skin. He just wishes Y/N was here with him. Memories flash through his mind of spending time with her, having picnics together, buying ice creams for each other, giving her piggy back rides, running for shelter in the rain, playing catch and almost hitting people in the face because he forgot about the true strength of his arm. The memories are full of laughter, and Bucky almost starts laughing as he remembers them. But then he remembers that they’re not friends anymore, and his smile fades. He continues walking, trying his best to ignore the guilt.
As he looks around, he looks up and sees a familiar face from across the park, stopping him in his tracks. Is that...Sean? It definitely looks like him. Bucky realises he’s finally been granted a second chance. All he has to do is go over there, apologise and then everything would be better again. But as he’s making his way over to him, Bucky realises he’s not alone. Sean is accompanied by a woman. A woman who definitely isn’t Y/N. Although the can feel anger rising within him, Bucky takes a deep breath. Maybe he got it wrong again, and this isn’t Sean, or the woman he’s with is a distant relative? Or a friend? ...And then Sean pulls her close, and kisses her on the lips. Okaaaay....maybe Sean somehow has an identical twin who just so happens to live in the same town as them, and who neither he nor Y/N have mentioned before? Bucky suddenly realises the pair are heading towards him, and he’ll have to hide, or risk being discovered.
Thankfully, even though Bucky is still trying to forget the time he spent as the Winter Soldier, he hasn’t forgotten the stealth that came with it. So, he manages to find a hiding spot. Unfortunately, the park isn’t the best and most stealthiest place to hide, especially not for a man with a metal arm. So, Bucky has to resort to turning away and using his jacket’s collar as a form of protection. Thankfully, neither notice him, and walk past him. As they do, he hears a part of their conversation:
“Sean! You’re so bad!” She laughs.
“Can you blame me? You’re just so gorgeous baby.” Bucky feels his fists clenching as the reality begins to sink in. He was right. Sean is cheating on Y/N. He’s cheating on his best friend and the girl he’s been in love with since they first met. Bucky almost runs after Sean and confronts him. But before he does, his mind pictures Y/N, sifting alone in her apartment, completely unaware of the truth. And he realises what he has to do. So he starts to run towards her apartment.
On the way there, all Bucky can think about is the heartbreak that will be on her face when he tells her the truth. It’s going to break both of their hearts, but he has to do it. Soon, he reaches her building, and heads up to her apartment. As he knocks, he hopes to every god that she’s not in, so he doesn’t have to break the bad news to her. But despite all his hopes, the door opens, and Y/N peeks out. A smile grows onto her face when she sees Bucky, which causes another pang at his heart. How can he do this to her?
“Bucky...hi.” She smiles. “I was wondering if you’d come round. I need to talk to you. I-“
“Y/N listen.” Bucky cuts her off. She looks at him, her eyes curious. Sighing, he continues. “I have to tell you something. I was just at the park, and I saw Sean with another girl.” Y/N scoffs, and almost cuts in, but Bucky continues. “Please, hear me out. I know you probably don’t believe me, but I did see it, I promise. And the way they spoke about each other....I’m so sorry.”
“Seriously Bucky? You’re doing this again?” She sighs. “I’m sorry, but I don’t believe you. I trust Sean. I know you don’t trust him, but I know him better than you do. He wouldn’t do this. You don’t need to lie about him.” Bucky feels himself deflate slightly at that. Why won’t she believe him? Okay, maybe the first time, it was unbelievable, but now?
“...That’s not it at all! I’m just trying to protect you!” Bucky says. Y/N looks at him, a sympathetic look in her eyes.
“Well, I appreciate it, but I really don’t need you to. Sean and I were talking and-“ Bucky groans. That’s just what he needed. “And maybe...I don’t know, you’re jealous? Or you’re upset that I’m not spending as much time with you? If you are that’s okay, I’d understand. You don’t have to make up these lies. Both Sean and I are willing to sit and chat with you about this if you want, or I can come with you to your next therapy appointment if that’s easier.”
“No.” Bucky shakes his head. “I’m not lying. Please...why won’t you believe me?”
“Because I love him, and he loves me. When I'm with him, I'm happy, and so is he. Why would he do anything to jeopardise that?” Bucky feels his heart break again. Especially because he knows Sean doesn’t love her as much as he says he does. “Look, why don’t you come in for some tea, or a beer?” She offers, standing aside for him. Close to tears again, Bucky shakes his head.
“I’m sorry Y/N. But I can’t. If you don’t want to hear the truth because you’re so in love, I..I guess I understand. But I can’t stay here and watch you both together, knowing the kind of person he is.” He reaches out and gently takes her hands in his. “If you need me, you know where to find me. If not...well, I guess this is goodbye.” He whispers. He can see her face fall, and he turns and walks away. Bucky manages to maintain a straight face until he reaches the elevator, and then...he lets the tears fall.
~*~*~*~*~
In the days after Bucky said goodbye to Y/N, he feels even worse than he did the first time. This time feels more final. Now he doesn’t venture out of his apartment at all. Sam has been trying his best to talk to him, and get him outside, but Bucky has been ignoring him. He knows he shouldn’t be ignoring his friend, especially after losing one already...but by this point, Bucky has decided that he might as well lose all his friends at this point. He just doesn’t care anymore.
One day, almost two weeks since Bucky said goodbye to Y/N, he gets up around the middle of the afternoon, ready to spend this day like any other. But he’s soon stopped by a knock on his door. “Go away Sam!” He calls. But the knocking continues. “I’m not answering the door!” But still, the knocking doesn't stop. Bucky huffs, and stomps towards the door, flinging it open. “Sam! I told you to leave me alo-....Oh.” There, stands Y/N, tears streaming down her face. Seeing her there, Bucky is silent for a while. Part of him is convinced he’s still dreaming, and almost pinches himself to check he isn’t. But before he can do that, Y/N speaks, her voice shaky.
“I owe you an apology.” Bucky stands aside, letting her in, which she gladly accepts. She sits on his couch, bringing her knees up to her face as Bucky closes the door.
“Do you uh..do you want something to drink? Or eat?” He offers. Y/N shakes her head, and Bucky sits down beside her. “What happened?” He asks, although he already has a feeling what it is.
“Well...you were right. He cheated on me. I uh...I came home from work early, and went over to his place to surprise him. I let myself in and...he was fucking some girl on the couch. Guess I got the surprise.” She sniffles again, before bursting into tears.
“Oh doll...” Bucky soothes. “Come here.” He opens his non metal arm, and she scoots over to him. He wraps his arm around her, pulling her into his chest, and holds her as she cries. Anger grows within him as she cries her eyes out. He’s going to kill him.
“I’m...I’m sorry Bucky. I just feel...so stupid! How could I have not believed you! You were just trying to tell me the truth...and I didn’t listen! I said you were a liar!” She wails, and Bucky rubs her back.
“No, no. It’s okay. You don’t have to apologise.”
“B-B-But I was so horrible to you, a-and condescending. I’m the worst friend ever!” She sniffles. Bucky knows his shirt is definitely drenched with tears by now, but he doesn’t care. All he cares about is making sure Y/N is happy.
“Y/N. It’s okay. Honestly. You were in love, and that’s totally understandable. I wouldn’t have believed me either.” She looks as if she doesn’t fully believe what he’s saying, but doesn’t say anything regardless. Instead, they both sit together, and Bucky gently rubs her back and down her arms, letting her cry out all her tears. “Tell you what. How about you stay over here tonight? I think there’s still some of your things here from when you last stayed over. I have a shirt I can give you if there isn’t. We can order some takeout, whatever you want, and we can play some video games...watch a movie, even one of those Disney ones you like so much.” Y/N smiles at that, and Bucky smiles with her. "There’s that smile I love so much. And tomorrow, I’ll go with you to his place, and we can grab your stuff. I can also kick his ass, or just stand around looking intimidating, whatever works.” Y/N lets out a loud laugh at that, making Bucky’s smile grow even wider. Hearing her laugh again is great.
“You are great at that, I have to admit.” She nods. Bucky winks. “Thanks Bucky. You’re the best. I don’t know what I did to deserve you in my life.” Bucky’s heart soars at that. It’s been a long time since someone told him that.
“You know doll, I ask myself the same question about you too.” He responds, making her smile. Before either can say anything though, there’s another knock at he door. Both look at each other, confused. “Sam? Is that you?” Bucky calls. They get their answer a few seconds later.
“Y/N? Are you in there? Let me in please!” Sean’s voice calls.
“Oh god, what is he doing here?” Y/N groans. Getting progressively angrier and protective, Bucky gets up off the couch, heading towards the door. Y/N gets up too, and Bucky gently moves her behind him for protection. Bucky opens the door, and Sean looks up, spotting Y/N behind Bucky.
“Oh of course. She ran to the cyborg.” He scoffs. Bucky can smell some alcohol on his breath. His body tenses.
“Sean, what the fuck?! Don’t speak to him like that! Especially not when you’re the one who I just caught cheating on me.” Y/N orders, but she’s ignored. Sean looks at Bucky’s angry face, and laughs.
“I should’ve known. I can’t believe you’re getting mad at me for cheating once. Look at the two of you! Maybe I should’ve kept my eyes on you both. Who’s to say you didn’t cheat on me with him, huh?” Bucky’s fists clench, and Sean picks up on this immediately. “Oh, look. What are you going to do to me, Winter Soldier? Are you going to kill me?” Bucky thinks it over for a moment, then laughs. Sean looks confused.
“I was thinking about it, but actually no, I won’t. I think I’ll let her handle it.” He smirks, standing aside to let Y/N step forward. She does...and immediately kicks Sean right in his balls, causing him to double over and groan in pain.
“You’re a fucking asshole. Bucky was right about you, and I should’ve listened to him instead of your dumb ass. Because of you, I almost lost one of the best things I've ever had in my life. And you only cheated on me once? Really? Somehow, I doubt that.” She hisses. “Tomorrow, I’m going to come and pick up my stuff, and you can come and get yours from mine. Whether it’ll all be intact or in the garbage, I don’t know. After that, you’re going to stay away from Bucky and I. Do you understand?” When he doesn’t reply fast enough, she kicks him in the leg, causing another groan. “Do you understand?!” She repeats, her voice angrier.
“Yes! Yes! I got it!” He says quickly. Y/N stands up straight again.
“Good. Now go back to whoever you were fucking on the couch, and leave us the fuck alone.” She orders, walking back into the apartment and slamming the door.
“Hey! That was great!” Bucky grins. “You sure showed him better than I ever could.”
“You really think so?” She asks, still slightly hyped on adrenaline. Bucky holds his arms out, pulling her into a tight hug.
“Yes! Of course I do!” He encourages, squeezing her even tighter. They stay like that for a while, until the pair suddenly realise just how close they are to each other. They awkwardly spring apart, and both blush. Even though Bucky likes being so close to her, and wishes it could be like that all the time...he also knows how weird it is to do that to his best friend, especially when she just found her boyfriend cheating on her. “Um...wanna order a pizza?” He asks, and Y/N nods.
~*~*~*~*~
Later that night, Bucky and Y/N lay side by side on Bucky’s couch, a large cheese pizza between their legs, and an half finished bottle of rosé on the floor beside the couch...mostly for Y/N. The opening song to Beauty and the Beast plays on the television in front of them. “Here’s where she meets Prince Charming, but she won’t discover that it’s him til chapter three....” Y/N sings to herself, and she looks over at Bucky as she does. A small smile plays on her lips, and she starts to giggle. Bucky raises an eyebrow, asking if everything is okay. “It’s uh...it’s dumb. Well, not dumb. I was being dumb.” Y/N speaks quickly, before giggling even more. Bucky looks confused, and she continues. “I probably shouldn’t say this until I’m sober, but I’ve had a rough day and I have to let this out. It’s been eating me up inside for the past few days, and this afternoon.”
Bucky pauses the movie, and turns to her. “Well that line kind of fits us! I mean....uh. I wasn’t being entirely honest with you at first. When Sean came over, and he said he should have kept his eyes on us, uh...” She takes a breath in an attempt to compose herself. “A few days ago, we had an argument about you...well, me and you.” She clarifies. “He was convinced that I liked you more than I liked him, and when I was on my way over here, I had a think about it, and....I think he’s maybe right.” Bucky almost feels his heart stop at that moment. She...likes him? Does she mean..in that way? Y/N continues. “I asked myself why I kept listening to him instead of you, and I realised...I wasn’t ever in love with him that much. But you...god Bucky, I’ve been in love with you since I met you. I just didn’t think you liked me in that way, so when a guy showed up who said he liked me, I kind of jumped at that and didn’t want to lose it, even when it’s obvious he didn’t love me. I was just so desperate to be loved, I blocked everything else out. And look where it got me.” She scoffs, finishes her glass of wine, and places it down. “I’m sorry Bucky. For everything.”
“You don’t have to apologise. I told you.” Bucky replies, still in shock she might like him back.
“I know, I know, but I do. And for what it’s worth, it’s okay if you don’t like me in that way. I just had to let it out. I’d understand if you don’t.” Without even responding, Bucky leans forward, and gently presses a kiss to her lips.
“Well...I do. I have for a long time.” He whispers. Y/N’s eyes go wide, and her cheeks flush.
“Oh...” She trails off. “Well, would you uh...would you like to go out with me sometime? On a date?” She asks. Bucky chuckles softly.
“I would love to. But first, can I ask you to do something for me?” Y/N nods. “Can you kiss me again?” He asks. Smiling, both lean forward, pressing a kiss to each other’s lips. Even though both have no idea where their relationship will go from here, they’re ready to face it together.
And this time, Bucky doesn’t hate her new boyfriend. At least...not too much.
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky imagine#bucky fic#bucky x y/n#fanfiction#fanfic
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MC's Family Finds Out that They're Actually Dating a Demon the Hard Way
Demon boys more or less going demon on the MC's family. Bound to happen really. This one ain’t so cuddly guys. Special thanks to @anonimo324 for the inspiration for this one. Literally never would have occurred to me if they hadn't have said something and I love the excuse to revisit this idea. 😄
Check out the Masterlist for more!
IMPORTANT: Continuation to "Demon Brothers Meeting the MC's Family" The general setup to this post is in that one.
Lucifer
You know what they say about things that seem too good to be true, right?
Oh, their MC's new boyfriend was smooth, put together, intelligent…
And prideful. So very prideful.
It radiated off of him like no tomorrow, there was just a subtle but constant air of superiority to everything the man did or said. Some may find it attractive but others? It can drive other people right up the wall.
And that's exactly what it did to some members of the MC's family. Even if he seemed educated and well-spoken what made him think he was so special? What made him think he was just so much better than the rest of the world??
They couldn't have known just how angry he'd get when they confronted him about it.
They couldn't have known that they weren’t questioning an arrogant man, but a prideful demon who'd take offense at the mere thought of being anywhere near their level.
It was only when he stood towering before them, demonic wings and horns in full view, did they learn the folly of their actions.
In their hospital beds, bones broken and bodies bruised, they'd rant and rave to anyone who'd listen "He's a demon! A demon! My child/sibling/etc. is dating a demon!!"
The MC disappeared with Lucifer that night, however. Their family writes them off as either dead or kidnapped for torture purposes.
In truth, they returned to the Devildom and Lucifer will never hear the end of how he lost control and attempted to skewer the MC's family members. Surely such a mighty demon should have better control than that... 🙄😑
Mammon
His dumbass let it slip a couple months in, but not without good reason for once.
He had actually been doing pretty well with their family. Sure he wasn't perfect, but he made it clear enough he was looking out for MC and honestly the rest of them as well.
It was small things. Checking up on them sometimes. Making sure the little ones, if any, were safe. Not stealing anything that isn't nailed down (though that's something the MC notices more than their family of course).
It takes a lot. A lot. A LOT to make Mammon break out his demon form. He's better at keeping it in than Lucifer. But showing him something that’s threatening MC is actually a pretty quick why to do it.
The family was out together on a shopping trip, a giddy Mammon included because he knew that meant he could beg ask the MC to buy him stuff.
They really should have checked before they started strolling down the damn crosswalk, but they didn't, and an impatient taxi went hurtling towards them.
Before they could even open their eyes Mammon was already lecturing them about their stupidity, holding them on the other side of the street. Shirtless because his demon form was out and the dumbass forgot to hide it again. Even though they were in public.
He was quick to change back once he noticed, but the damage was done. You can say their family was a little surprised that he straight up grew wings and horns. Only one of them fainted anyway.
To avoid causing further panic, Mammon just legs it away with MC still in his arms, shouting back an quick expletive laced "apology" over his shoulder.
MC smooths things over with their family later by phone. No one can quite wrap their head around the fact that Mammon is a demon, despite what they had seen, but it helps that he did seem to want to protect them.
The MC is not allowed to come home if they want to bring their demon boyfriend too, but their family isn't as worried about them as they could be. Mammon's looking out for them after all.
Leviathan
Okay. They always knew the boy was a little weird but hot damn did that opinion suddenly go from 0 to 60 real quick.
Levi was distant and off-putting at first but in time it became pretty clear that he was just pretty awkward. He wasn't the best with people, but he seemed harmless enough.
It was the MC's idea to bring him along on a family weekend trip to the beach. They honestly couldn't understand why at first. He never seemed to like being with them...
It DID start to click for them a little more when they saw the guy in the water though. They can say it's probably the first time they'd ever seen him so comfortable in his own skin. He even started smiling!
Things were actually going smoothly for them all for once… until other people started taking notice of MC in their swimsuit and one bold gentleman decided to make a cheeky comment on it.
Now, Levi had always stuck close to MC when he was around them. He was practically a second shadow. But it seemed like the second he took notice of those glances he got extra clingy and after that comment.. he started to have a meltdown.
The once bold gentleman was kindly picked up by the neck and hurdled into the ocean like a Frisbee. It would have been hilarious if it weren't so horrifying.
It was about the time that the lad grew a snake tail that the MC's family peaced out off the beach, screaming in terror. MC and Levi left too, mostly because Levi was hellbent on dragging them back to the Devildom in a jealous rage. Obviously THIS is the kind of shit that happens when he leaves his room!
No plans are ever made to go visit again, which he's very happy about. He hated being out in "the real world" anyway.
Satan
Nice as he could be, that temper was bound to catch up to him eventually…
There would be small incidents. A kid cuts him off on the sidewalk and he'd get a little loud and snippy about it. A dog won't stop barking at him and he'd just glare and send it away with a terrified whimper. These things were… worrisome. But not all that demonic.
Then other red flags started showing up. A person on the street would be rude to him and he'd look honestly ready to kill. It'd take MC physically holding him back to keep him in place. Their family was worried about them… Had they'd fallen victim to a possible abuser...?
MC had never listened to what their family had to say, always claiming that they were perfectly safe with their boyfriend. That he had to listen to what they said. But no one really bought that…
Well if there is one way to piss Satan off (and there are many) probably the fastest and most lethal is to doubt his intelligence. Especially if you're only one of those everyday, average humans...
That poor employee at the bookstore had no idea what kind of mistake they made when he told Satan he wasn't looking for Camus but Kafka then refused to double check. Satan doesn't make mistakes about his authors. Ever.
What was originally just supposed to be a relaxing afternoon with the family turned into a night in the station as everyone was questioned about the employee whose head got flattened against the store counter-top. The police weren't entirely convinced a demon did it, but they would look for a blonde.
Said demon had chucked MC over his shoulder and took off before the police arrived to investigate, which as far as they're concerned also kind of amounts to kidnapping.
Satan's now a fugitive in the MC's hometown and on the FBI's Most Wanted List so safe to say that they won't really be visiting anymore.
Asmodeus
Not as surprised as you might think. There were some signs…
Asmo had a bewitching quality to him that went well into the unnatural. He could soothe and win over right about any person or animal to an… uncomfortable degree.
He also kept bringing up and babbling about nonsense products all the time. He always seemed to have the perfect hair treatment or know the best drinks but no one else had ever heard of any of it. What the heck even is Demonus…?
But the real kicker was, well, just how lustful he was. There were horn dogs and then there was this guy. It felt like he could flirt with a potted plant sometimes.
Though he was nice, no one in their house thought Asmo was faithful to MC. And even if he were, his blatant willingness to tease right about anyone he came across was showing them disrespect.
Unfortunately, they had made the poor decision to confront him about it and claim that he didn't actually "love" MC….
There are few things more brutal and less forgiving than an enraged Asmo. Here he was with these humans, people he had been nothing but nice to, and they were doubting his love for MC?? What gave them the right!?
He had his demon form out and his whip already raised to teach these slanderers a lesson! Even if he had grown to like some of them, his anger took over his reason and he had to vent his displeasure NOW.
The MC stepped in before he could crack the whip and made him stop. Their family was terrified but he charmed them into calming down while he and MC talked things out.
They (by which I mean mostly a fuming Asmo) decided that since their family couldn't understand their love for each other, they didn't deserve to see it.
They leave the house calmly and don't come back. MC still sometimes calls their family, but they refuse to leave the Devildom or their beautiful fallen angel, no matter how much their family pleads for them to come home.
Beelzebub
On the one hand, absolutely no one wants to believe it… But it also does make a lot of things make more sense in hindsight.
Like, he was built like a linebacker so it was sort of understandable just how many calories his body seemed to need but there was a limit.
He. Just. Kept. Eating. Never-endingly hungry. Always poking through the kitchen or ordering a mountain of pizzas. More impressively, he never made any leftovers… Ever.
He was such a sweetheart though… They tried to turn a blind eye for a while. Make excuses and rationalize the impossible… but it couldn't last.
It was only supposed to be one nice dinner out. MC had gone over the rules with him ten times before going, "This is a human restaurant and I'm paying, so you HAVE to stop at thirds. Okay? Okay??"
He tried. But the food was sooo good, he just couldn’t stop! And, like clockwork, here comes the manager to cut him off and there goes an angry Beel. Full demon form, tossing tables and wrecking chairs to everyone's absolute horror.
MC had to use the pact to stop him. They could only leave their family with a quick goodbye before they had to book it from the cops on Beel's back as he flew away.
To say there was a mini-meltdown among the members left behind would be an understatement. What the HELL just happened to the sweet young man they had come to know???
The damages were paid for by Lucifer a "mysterious donor" and everything was explained to their family by MC over video call from the Devildom with a very guilty and apologetic Beel in attendance.
When it was clear that the MC wasn't going to leave him or literal Hell despite their protests, they either had to accept it or never hear from them again. Members made their choices, but it's pretty hard to stay mad at someone they've grown to like so much...
He's no longer allowed to go visit them in the human world (which is probably for the best) but shows up on MC's video calls regularly. They still kind of think of him as family even if he could eat them all. He's just such a nice lad, you know?
Belphegor
…. You know, there was always something kind of off about that kid.
It was always hard to place what made Belphie so… different. It could have been the way he never seemed to take any of them seriously or the kind of amazing lack of energy he brought to things.
It also could have been the fact he kept making comments about being a demon, going to "hell," knowing Satan personally, etc. but always played them off as jokes.
Honestly when it finally came out that yes, he was actually a demon, it was almost a relief because it made waaaay more sense than not.
Still fucking terrifying, though.
One of their family members had made the mistake of waking him up from a nap when he and MC were there for a visit
Now. It's not easy to wake Belphie even on a good day but an airhorn to the face is probably not the way to go about it.
When he sent said family member soaring out the window, one-handed, with his horns and tail on full display and a familiar look of murder in his eyes, MC knew the charade was pretty much up...
True to his word, Belphie doesn't let some humans keep MC away from him. He scooped them up and hopped out the broken window before they could really even protest or explain anything.
Which, I mean, how does one even go about smoothing over the fact your demon boyfriend just yeeted one of your family members out of the house?
Their family is kind of able to put two and two together themselves regardless. Which is good because neither Belphie or MC are probably coming back any time soon. If ever. Hope they enjoy postcards...
#obey me#obey me shall we date#shall-we-date-obey-me#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphegor#still too fun to write#satan runnin' from the FBI man#beel would call your parents mom and dad#obey me headcanons#obey me scenarios
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Could you do a HC on how the Mayans men would react to a girl getting hit on at a bar and the guy not taking no for an answer, like they don't know her or anything. I feel like they all respect women enough to at least do something about it; ya know?
All of the Mayans men wake up every day and drink a full pitcher of Respect Women Juice. They will not tolerate disrespect in their house. HC’s under the cut!
(I couldn’t decide if i wanted to do third person or reader insert for these but I settled on reader insert. Hopefully it works alright)
Bishop:
-Senses the tension immediately
-My man sits back and watches the entire clubhouse all night. He knows everything that’s going on. And when he notices that some guy is refusing to leave you alone, he instantly gets up and goes to intervene.
-He’s not hot-headed about it. He doesn’t have the time or the energy for that anymore. But he places himself between the two of you, looking back and forth, “Everything alright here?”
-The guy would try to brush it off and reassure him that yea, of course everything is okay you can leave now. But Bishop wouldn’t have any of that. He’d cut him off mid-sentence, “I wasn’t fucking asking you.”
-He’d turn to you and ask again if you’re alright. You’d give a slight shake of her head no, not wanting to stir up drama but also not wanting to deal with this dude anymore. And that’s all it would take.
-”I think you should leave,” he wouldn’t yell. Just state it as a fact. But when the guy would try to argue that’s when he would get a little more heated. He’d step in closer to the dude’s face, but not putting hands on him, “I said you should fucking leave.”
-Bishop only uses yelling and brute force as a last resort. Very rarely does it ever come to that. He would follow the guy all the way to the clubhouse door, making sure that he actually leaves before going back to check on the poor girl that he was harassing. He 100% lingers close for the rest of the night to make sure no one bothers you.
Angel:
-King of being the Fake Boyfriend.
-My tall boy might be emotionally illiterate sometimes but he can read a social situation. When he sees a girl scrambling to try and come up with excuses to make a guy leave her alone, he has no problem inserting himself into the situation.
-Smooth as fuck walking up to you, greeting you while resting a protective hand on your shoulder. Instantly setting the tone to whoever is talking to you that this was a useless endeavor.
- "Hey, querida,” he’d wait for you to look at him, “Sorry, didn’t see you walk in. You get a drink already? Want me to get you something?”
-The look in his eyes would let you know that he’s offering you an out to the uncomfortable situation that you’re in. He’s not trying to flirt--he’s just trying to drive away whatever asshole wasn’t catching the hint that you didn’t want to talk.
- "Who the fuck are you?” this is a problem that the guy did not see coming.
-Angel would look at him, eyes narrow, “I’m her boyfriend. Who the fuck are you?”
- The question is rhetorical. It doesn’t matter who the guy is. Angel doesn’t give him a chance to answer. He steps closer to the guy, towering over him. He looks down at him and is practically begging the guy to say something stupid so he has an excuse to physically throw him out the front door.
- He doesn’t get the chance, though. The guy reads the cue, knows that it’s a fight that he will not win, and walks away.
- Angel would turn back to you, “You good? Sorry about that. Didn’t seem like he was getting the hint.”
- You’d shake your head, “He wasn’t. Thank you, I appreciate the assist.”
- “No problem,” he’d pause, “But forreal did you get a drink already? First round on me.”
Ezekiel:
- Y’all remember the casino scenes with the cops? That’s how he handles shit.
- Master of keeping his cool in frustrating situations. Completely follows your lead. He sees a lot of weird interactions being on the serving side of the bar, always clocking what’s happening in front of him in case he has to step in.
-He’d notice you rolling your eyes and giving short answers. He’d also notice that the guy either isn’t picking up the cues, or is willfully ignoring them. EZ catches your eyes a few times, silently asking if you want him to step in. You shake your head--the guy is annoying but harmless for the time being.
- Then he tries to touch you. Casually reaching for your shoulder, trying to rest his hand on your knee. You recoil, trying to create more space between the two of you. He doesn't care though.
- That’s when EZ can’t keep it to himself anymore. He’d sigh, not looking up from the glasses that he’s cleaning, “I don’t think she’s into you, man.”
- You and the man would both turn to look at him, each of you with a surprised expression on your faces. You’d stay quiet, wanting to see how the situation was going to play out. The man next to you would scoff, “I don’t remember you being part of this fucking conversation.”
- “I might as well be if I have to sit here and watch it. You’re the only one out of the three of us not suffering from how uncomfortable this is.”
- His commentary would ruffle some feathers. The man next to you would get defensive, “No one asked for your fucking opin--”
- Knowing that EZ had your back would give you a little extra confidence, “You should listen to him,” you nod, “He’s right. We’re suffering.”
- He’d be caught off-guard by the two of you teaming up on him. Realizing it wouldn't be worth the fight, he’d huff and walk away. EZ would watch him and chuckle, calling after him, “Least you could do is pay your fucking tab!”
- You’d laugh, glad to be done with the uncomfortable situation, “His drink and whatever you want are all on me tonight. As a thank you.”
- He’d give you that little smirk, “Don’t mention it.”
Coco:
- Zero tolerance policy.
- Not coy or polite about it at all.
-Instantly uses himself as a barrier between you and whatever guy it is that’s not leaving you alone. He might not be the biggest guy in the MC, but he sure as hell carries himself like he is when the situation calls for it.
-Will not hesitate to get nose-to-nose with whoever is bothering you. If someone wants to invade your space, he’ll invade theirs. Fair is fair.
- “You really can’t take a fuckin’ hint, huh?” he’d shake his head.
- “What’s your problem?” the man’s voice would sound confident but the look in his eyes would show that he really didn't want a problem with whoever this guy was getting in his face.
- “You. Fuckin’ beat it,” he’d jerk his head towards the door, “Don’t come back, either.”
- Coco carries himself with the confidence of a man that will make someone pay dearly for coming back uninvited. Confrontational situations usually resolve themselves quickly. People tend to not want to mess with him if they can avoid it.
-When the guy inevitably leaves not just you, but the clubhouse altogether, Coco finally turns back to you, “You good, ma?”
- You nod, watching him light up a cigarette, “Uh, yea. I’m good. Thanks for that.”
- He nods, blowing out a puff of smoke, “We’ll make sure that fucker never comes back.”
Hank:
- The only thing that Hank Loza drinks is Respect Women Juice. When he runs across someone that doesn’t, it gets out of hand really quickly.
-Bull in a china shop.
- The same man who is usually calm and cool and collected, physically removes whoever it is that is causing a problem. The guys have tried to teach him deescalation skills but it never sticks. It’s the only thing that Hank gets heated about so they all let it go at this point.
- Hank isn’t a small dude. When he steps toe-to-toe with someone he almost always out-sizes them. They get about 5 seconds to hear what he says and leave on their own before he removes them on his own.
- “You should leave her alone,” the friendly suggestion is really anything but.
- The guys are almost always cocky, not thinking that anything is actually going to happen to them, “Or what, tough guy?”
- They ignored their first and only warning. What happens next is all on them. Hank grabs the guy by the collar of his shirt, lifting him from the ground. His voice is quiet, which is way more terrifying than yelling, “Let’s find out.”
- Hank lifts and carries the guy out, on the brink of dragging him like a caveman. The guy is yelling in protest, trying to swing, but Hank is unfazed.
- He throws the guy down the steps of the clubhouse, giving a final warning not to come back. No longer in an agumentative mood, the man takes off in a desperate attempt to avoid getting further tossed around.
- When he goes back into the clubhouse, the rest of the guys have moved on from the situaiton--to them it was business as usual for Hank. You, on the other hand, didn't see the situation unfolding that way at all. He walked back up to you, the anger gone from his face, a gentle smile there instead.
- “Are you alright?” he looks you over as if to make sure you didn't get hurt in the midst of it all.
- “Yea,” you nod, “I’m...I’m fine. Thanks. You...you didn’t have to do all that.”
- He’d chuckle, knowing that for him it was the only course of action, “Of course I did,” he’d gently rest his hand on the outside of your arm, “Let me know if anyone else gives you any trouble.”
Creeper:
- The smaller version of Hank, tbh. Constantly out here Respecting Women.
- Remember that scene where he catches a shotgun that’s tossed to him and immediately starts shooting on the highway?? That’s the energy he has when dealing with men who disrespect women.
- Cannot easily lift and remove men the same way Hank does, but he will throw hands without hesitation.
- The guys told him no more threatening with guns in the clubhouse. So fists will have to suffice.
- Does not offer a warning to the guy. If someone is being pushy or rude, they don’t deserve a heads-up. He will try to get your attention in some way first, to make sure that you want him to intervene. If he thinks that it’s going to get out of hand, or if you let him know with a pleading look that you could use the assist, he is instantly throwing himself into the middle of it.
- He’d catch your eye, motioning back and forth between you and the man in front of you to ask if you need an out. You’d give him a slight nod and that’s all it would take.
- Walking up, he grabs the guy by his shoulder and turns him around, “Hey, motherfucker,” he’d shove him towards the door of the clubhouse, “Leave.”
- Caught off-guard, the man would shove him back. Fully-bruised ego shining through, “Keep your hands off me.”
- That’s when you’d hear the first crack of a fist colliding with someone’s jaw. Your eyes would go wide, not ever having seen Creeper get like this. His focus would be completely on the man stumbling towards the ground in front of him, “I said get the fuck out.”
- It usually doesn’t take more than one punch to get his point across. HIs muscles aren’t just for show--getting clocked by him fucking hurts. They’re lucky that he’s not big on wearing rings.
- Once the threat is neutralized, he instantly shifts back into his quiet, gentler self to check in with you. He sees the surprise in your face at how things unfolded and he holds his hands up in surrender, “I’m done, promise.”
- It’d get you to laugh. You can see it in his expression that it’s almost like a switch he can flip on and off. “Um. Thank you. That...isn’t what I was expecting. But thank you.”
- “Are you alright?” he’d sit down next to you, mindful to give you some space.
- “Yea, I’m good. How’s your hand?”
- He’d chuckle, “All good. Nothing new.”
Okay this was a lot of fun. I love all these dorks. Hope you enjoyed! xo
#ask#asks#mayans mc#mayans mc imagine#mayansmc#mayans fx#angel reyes#bishop losa#ez reyes#ezekiel reyes#hank loza#tranq loza#creeper vargas#neron vargas#coco cruz#johnny coco cruz#Anonymous#hc#mayans hc#mayans mc hc#drabblesmc
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saying you’re “mad” txt hasn’t released anti romantic in English is, I’m sorry to say, racist. It may be unintentional but it IS racist. Koreans do not have to make English music for you to go to work and not annoy your coworkers. That’s not their business, just like it’s none of YOUR business what they release. It doesn’t matter how good the song is to you. It doesn’t matter if it “slaps”. It doesn’t matter that it’s given you “ANY interest in txt’s music”.
You’re just one—entitled—consumer and saying you’re mad about this is genuinely just embarrassing, no matter how lighthearted you meant the post to be. And before you come at me, it’s not “not that deep.” This is 100% a microaggression that’s perpetuated all over the place in this industry. Koreans don’t need to speak English for you as a white person. You’re annoying to think otherwise and I have absolutely no respect for that creepy attitude. And also, the fact you try to double down with some point about how this would gain them success on the charts is a ridiculously inappropriate statement. You’re not their manager, friend, or an expert. I don’t have any type of blind trust in BigHit—they’re not perfect or even great at managing their artists—but you, a white/non-Korean woman, making some kind of statement about their success just because of a work playlist is uncalled for. If their professional judgement made them want to record an English version, they would have. And the truth is, you’re only bringing that up to exude a sense of selflessness. You complain about something that is ONLY a problem to you and then back it up with some crock that is “to help them.” Again, maybe it’s unintentional but it gives the strongest air of white-saviorism. You definitely need to check yourself for that privilege, especially with the way you interact with that whole industry.
I was so confused when I checked my inbox and saw this series of messages lol, like I forgot I even posted that, so I was confused why you’re coming in my inbox three days after I said this. But I scrolled down and found my post to remind myself what I said:
I really didn’t mean for it to come off like any of the way that you described, but reading this back I can see how you got your interpretation. I just want to clarify what I was trying to say, and I’m sorry if it still doesn’t come across in the right way. First, I love the song the way it is, I generally don’t care that it’s not in English, and that goes for basically every single Kpop song I’ve heard. If I didn’t want to listen to music in Korean, I wouldn’t be a Kpop fan. I’m not saying that I wish they would just sing in English or speak in English because that would be ridiculous, and if I wanted those things I would just be a fan of artists that only sang or spoke in English. That’s not at all what I was trying to say.
Secondly, I understand that it is a big issue with people (“fans”) telling artists to speak/sing in English, so maybe I should have phrased it differently in that post, but that is simply not really the way I think about it.
Third, my coworkers and the area I live in are largely country-music loving people, so a lot of pop music isn’t exactly their taste and especially not music when it’s in a different language. Some people just like music that they can understand and sing along to without having to learn a new language, and I don’t think there’s really any harm in that unless they’re being rude and/or disrespectful towards people who are fans of that type of music. Because of that, I stand by what I said about if the song were in English it would have been popular on American charts, like it’s undeniable that BTS started getting more radio play when they made English songs, like even my coworkers (who, again, largely listen to country, and sometimes very mainstream pop) have heard and recognize Dynamite and Butter.
Fourth, I am totally and fully aware that this music is not being made for me personally in any way, shape, or form. As you point out, I am white and an English speaker, so clearly the entirety of the Kpop genre was not created with me or anyone like me in mind. I don’t think that these artists need to cater to my specific tastes. Like damn lol I don’t think my opinion is gonna change anything, I don’t expect it to have any influence, just like when I complained about Sticker and said Lemonade should’ve been the title track, I didn’t think that opinion mattered either because it doesn’t. I’m sure their management teams are gonna do their best to make the best decisions for the group.
So lastly, Anti-Romantic is a terrific song exactly the way it is, I love it totally, and TXT is good too. I’m not saying anything against any of that, I was just trying to express my frustration that my coworkers don’t like Kpop music in the slightest (and to each their own, people like the music that they like. I like Kpop and they don’t. They like screamo music or country music, and I don’t really like either of those much), and since I know they won’t give the songs a chance in Korean, I just wish there was the opportunity for them to fall in love with the song in English, as maybe that could act as a gateway into the appreciation for more Kpop songs in Korean. Like I said up top, I’m sorry if this still comes across as rude because I really genuinely don’t mean it to be, I did mean the original post in a lighthearted way, and I am aware that there are prevalent issues throughout the world and among the Kpop community that could make that post seem a lot less lighthearted and more serious
#asks#also I don’t see there being any problem with me saying that the song is what got me into txt#cherry bomb got me into nct before that i didn’t know or care about their music#just like before anti romantic I only knew txt as the boys who like barked in a song or something
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On being SO DONE with M*sha, a rant a decade in the making!
After giving this some thought I'm going to go ahead and give my opinion on Misha and yesterday’s situation in public for the first time ever. I was going to just post on Twitter but since this has been 12 years in the making I have exceeded the number of tweets I can put in one thread! There’s A LOT in here, so my summary is also long. I'm aware that I will lose followers over this, I'm not looking to offend anyone but it will inevitably happen. I wish anyone leaving all the best as fellow human beings.
TL;DR - having kept quiet for so long I’ve finally reached my limit and it’s all come bubbling out. I’ve never been a fan of Misha, I’ve been ambivalent for the most part, but have never criticised him in any hateful way, that's not who I am, but after all these years of putting up with his bullshit, attention seeking and troublemaking I am DONE. Deleting his tweet containing the word Wincest and replacing it with an APOLOGY just to pander to his Minions and save face is the straw that broke the camel's back. He has consistently pushed his ship on not only fans but on other actors (despite Jensen's discomfort, and him having repeatedly made his feelings known on it), he has stood by while his Minions/Hellers have harassed, victimised, doxxed and sent death threats to people based on their FICTIONAL ships. He has pandered to their gatekeeping, constantly demanded attention in obvious and not so obvious ways, and to the best of my knowledge never criticised their actions even though he's aware of it in a very real way. Some of his Minions have now taken their shit into The Boys fandom and created negativity for Jensen before the guy has even got a foot through the set door, and how is that supporting one half of your ship?
Misha has claimed to be a victim of targeted harassment from Wincest/brother fans (not only shippers) yet his fans have said and done the most despicable things on his watch, all in the name of what he must think is entertainment, or even his idea of a ‘joke’.
Any respect I had for the man based on his humanitarian work has gone because I can only take so much hypocrisy. He and his pandering because of a desperate attempt to be woke and wholly inclusive (which is actually impossible, no matter how good intentions are) are beyond pathetic. Whilst I have never seen why people think he’s so great I have friends IRL and online who genuinely adore the man, yet they have been shocked and upset by his contempt for half of the fandom that made him somewhat famous. It's disgusting and I'm not scrolling by any more. Misha, I hope to never see you on anything J2 related in future because none of us need that kind of negativity, *especially* not J2. Be gone, foul fiend!
OK, so to the too long part. Please be aware that these are my opinions as a fan of the show, of Sam and Dean, and J2, not only as a shipper. I can separate canon and fanon, and can view canon from a gen or shippy PoV. Whether you agree or disagree with my opinion let me be clear that I do not condone constant bashing and hate of a person or character so this isn’t the start of a regular thing for me. It's possible to have an opinion and not show the same vitriol that has been following this man around for years, and that’s what I’m doing. I've not posted this to prompt more negativity, it's simply to get it off my chest and make it clear how I feel. I stand by my philosophy of ship who you want to ship, enjoy it, but don't force it on other people and don't be a dick about it…hmm, that kinda sounds like familiar behaviour, though, does it not?!
I have ABSOLUTELY NO ISSUE with other people liking Misha, Cas or Destiel when it’s for the love of the characters and the ship. What I *do* have an issue with is people who are the true definition of a Heller. I don’t see that as a generic term, don't be ignorant and think I do because I know the difference between actual ship fans and the crazies, both ships have ‘em and I want no part of either of their venom. If you are reading this and class yourself as a Heller then you are part of the problem so run along and as you are all so fond of saying, 'get help' and take your bestie king with you.
I’m stating my opinion in what I feel is the most mature way I can, because unlike many people on SM, I am an adult and can act accordingly, with forethought and without resorting to temper tantrums and bullying of other people to get my point across. I am able to tell the difference between reality and fiction, I don't tar everyone with the same shipper brush and I don't expect everyone to agree with my opinion, but as we know opinions are like arseholes, we all have them and sometimes they stink. Unlike some, for the most part in life (online and offline) I *do* stand by what I say and don’t backtrack or delete things to appease the masses. I have spent a lot of time writing this out to be as clear as possible without being intentionally hateful. Bear with me jumping between actor and character where relevant, at this point they're conjoined. I will say this before I go any further, it doesn’t end well for Misha, I don’t mince my words and if you don’t like seeing facts and opinions laid out, this isn't the post for you.
I’ll say right off the bat what most of you have surmised - I’ve never held Misha (or Cas) in high esteem but I have never *hated* on him. I have shared mild criticism of his actions and opinions on Cas over the years but never, I feel, in any way that has made me feel I have something to apologise for. I have said several times I've been unhappy about Misha crashing con panels, taking attention away from J2 when at those cons *most* people paid their hard earned money to see the STARS of the show they love, first and foremost, and anyone else is a very nice bonus. The odd appearance here and there crashing a panel is fine (and Misha isn’t the first or last person to do it), maybe take up a few minutes then leave, but when someone commandeers an entire panel, that's just not on. It's not only selfish, rude and attention seeking but also disrespectful to other actors, fans and to the organisers who work hard to make sure everything ties in to give us the best con experience we can have. Everyone gets their turn on stage, there's no need to try and hog any more of the limelight, Veruca Salt style. Oh, and if you’re reading this and not getting that reference, (a) you shouldn’t be on my blog because you’re far too young, (b) look it up, and if you still don’t get what I’m saying… well then please refer to point (a). Thank you, kindly!
There was a time in Kripke's era where Cas was - I feel - intentionally used as a pawn by the writers to divert *canon* from the ‘questionable’ relationship between Sam and Dean, i.e. Wincest focus. Prior to that people (other fans) lightened up and just accepted the fact that Wincest had been there since day one in terms of the writing of the show and the fandom. All the cast and crew knew - J2, Kripke and JDM in particular - and made light of it, never judging, never shaming and often encouraging it because they understand it’s a fun part of fandom. Wincest was present enough to be part of the not so subtle subtext, as I said people just accepted it. Kink tomato was alive and well, so was ‘don’t like, don’t read’ and we all just scrolled over things we didn’t like without turning everything into a personal vendetta and excuse for bullying others who didn’t share our views. When the angels came into the plot I think most of us Wincest fans gave the Dean/Cas innuendos the small laugh they deserved and then turned back to the focus of the show which was the brothers, as it had always been intended. Misha, however, milked those moments as much as possible which was amusing at the start but got old *very* quickly, not just for fans (shippers and non shippers alike), but for other actors, in particular Jensen who is on record MULTIPLE times showing his dislike for Destiel. He told people outright that's not how he was playing the relationship between the two characters and CATEGORICALLY said "Destiel doesn't exist" but did it end there? No, it did not because neither fans or Misha let it go, in fact Misha only pushed more, goaded fans into flogging the same dead horse as much as possible. He’s never stopped, not even when there was so much discord in the fandom, a huge wedge was driven into it because of ships, which IMO he heavily contributed to.
Fast forward to over a decade later (a decade, seriously man, let it fucking go!) he didn’t even stop when Destiel did partially go canon. I have never doubted that Cas loved Dean (Sam, too) because in SPN lore angels are made to love, even rebellious ones. I, along with many others, liked that about Cas because who doesn't love a rebel, especially one rebelling for very good reasons, and because of those two wonderful men? Sam and Dean allowed him to see beyond what he'd been brainwashed to believe his entire existence. The fact is that although the nature of that love changed for Cas, it never did for Dean and was CANONICALLY UNREQUITED because Dean was incapable of loving anyone else as much as he loved Sam. All that mattered to Dean, even when he saw other characters as "family" was still Sam…ALWAYS Sam, every step of the way. Again for those who have too much Misha shaped wax in their ears, that’s canon. Whether people choose to see that love platonically or romantically is up to them, soulmates don't always have to be romantic, either way, brotherly love won out above all else on the show. No amount of Misha screaming ‘hey look, Destiel!’ changed that, but it sure didn’t stop him trying, did it?
So now that the obvious has been stated, here's something else we all know - never once in all of the years on the show did Misha drop rallying of the troops to his precious, ego stroking ship. Never once (that I am aware of) has he called out his Minions and Hellers on their continued harassment of everyone involved in the show and other fans despite the fact that they have bullied, victimised and wished bodily harm, rape and death on people who don't see their ship and because didn't get the ending to the story that they wanted. Not once has Misha shown any remorse for the trauma his "fans" have caused, and I’m taking REAL trauma, here, not the kind Twitter stans see as ‘triggering’ - people have been driven to close SM accounts, attempted, and in some cases succeeded in taking their own lives. These Minions have openly mocked Jared’s struggles with depression and anxiety, and Misha - who claims to be friends with J2 and be supportive of them in every way - has stood by and let it all play out, knowing full well some of the goings on, if not the full extent of how toxic these people are. We know he sees things being said online, and I have absolutely no doubt he spends time online searching his name for things that are relevant in some way to him in an effort to insert himself into a current conversation, or even start one so that attention is on him. Gotta stay relevant, somehow, right, Mish?
He has actively encouraged bullying by his actions of enabling the behaviours above, both by the flogging of the aforementioned dead horse, AND by not objecting to unacceptable behaviours. Remember when Minions and Hellers were slating J2, particularly Jared, for not posting on SM about BLM and other topics? Yeah, he didn’t ask them to stop doing that, either, even when he was tagged in things along the lines of ‘If Misha can post why can’t J2?’ etc. There have been some token protests, con vids I've seen have show his 'objections' which IMO have been done in a very tongue in cheek way, meaning that those people who needed to be pulled aside and told to change their ways just carried on, because their evil overlord didn’t explicitly explain it in terms a three year old could understand that bullying and forcing your opinion on others is WRONG. Not all of his cult are young and impressionable, not by a long shot, but many of the more vocal and vitriolic ones are.
As a father himself I wonder what Misha would do if he found out that his kids were behaving in ways his Minions are? I’m aware they’re young, but kids are cruel and bullying doesn’t just happen online. Even at whatever age they are, would he laugh it off the way he appears to have done with all of this fandom toxicity? Not bloody likely! I wonder if he’s as desperate to gain the approval of his family, friends and colleagues as he appears to be for that of his Minions/Hellers? I would certainly hope so, but that question can only be answered by Misha, himself, and I can and will not presume to speak on someone else's behalf on things in their personal life. For the record I would never presume I know what J2's answers would be on anything, however I do feel that after 15 years I have an accurate gauge on what kind of people they are so would be confident that any opinion I had on a matter aligns with their morals and ethics. As much as J2 have shared of themselves with us - willingly and under no pressure to do so, I might add - we don't *know* them, but we know enough to have an informed opinion. I can’t say the same for Misha because based on the behaviour he’s repeatedly displayed, things I've heard about from other fans as well as people I know IRL who have had direct dealings with him through cons or GISH (including some very actively in the early days when it was GISHWHES) he just hasn’t seemed like a person I wanted to follow on SM. I’ve never watched any of his solo panels, though I have watched ones with both or one of the J's, mostly being left irritated because of his behaviour. Watching the J’s put up with that shit is painful, and it’s a testament to how good they are as actors that they managed to hide at least some of their disdain for as long as they did. Microexpressions give them away, particularly Jensen, and they certainly have faces I have spent many years watching closely. Beautiful faces to go with beautiful souls, both of them! <3
I have precisely ZERO interest in Destiel as a ship, very little interest in Cas as a character anymore (though I did like him in the early days,and his relationship with Jack in late seasons) so I have absolutely no reason or desire to follow anything Misha does. That said, I've obviously been peripherally aware of some things he's been involved in because of friends, from things I’ve seen on SM and general fandom stuff. Despite the things I've already mentioned about his behaviour, up until now I have been able to maintain a level of respect for him as a person because of the humanitarian and charity work he's done. He seems like someone who really does want to change the world for the better and I am in full support of that fact, so much so that I have supported TWO campaigns relating to him. I bought one of the Super Good t-shirts for the campaign he did with Michael Sheen (a true angel!), the SPN/Good Omens x-over to help homeless charities, and I chose the design with text only and not artwork of Michael and Misha on, basically because I didn’t want to be wearing something with Misha’s face on it and I make absolutely no apology for that, whatsoever. I also bought Alex's #TheEndHasNoEnd shirt, which some of the profits went to Random Acts who do great work, so again, despite not liking Misha I still willingly contributed for a cause bigger than me, and to support Alex, who I absolutely ADORE. I'm aware that Stands aren't popular with some of the fandom, however since most of the cast of SPN are happily affiliated with them then I don't feel it's my place to either judge, or to discuss topics I know next to nothing about. But I digress, as a decent human being I have shown support tangentially to a man who I don't care for out of respect for the work he does outside the fandom. Telling you this isn’t to paint myself in a good light - I don’t need your approval, I’m a big girl, unlike some I don’t need constant validation! - only to provide background on how I’ve actively *not* hated on Misha.
Now though, any respect I had for him has come to an abrupt end, the events of the past 24 hours has seen to that. Whilst I have been annoyed at his behaviour in regards to shipping, I don't feel it's ever gone this far, or at least not that I've seen first hand. This man has, IMO, contributed to so much toxicity in the fandom by way of things I've mentioned before, he's claimed - without actually saying the words - that Wincest fans weren't interested in him as a character when he came onto the show, and hasn’t felt included because of the fans’ love of the brothers. Um, hate to break it to you, love, but when you come onto an established show that is about two people, and you’re a *guest star* you can’t expect everyone to love you. Some characters we as individuals do fall in love with straight away (Bobby, Charlie, Crowley and Rowena are good examples for me), it takes time to establish a dynamic, so if that’s how he felt then it was incredibly naive of him as an actor to expect instant acceptance from anyone. Also, why wait until after the show finished to bring it up AGAIN … oh wait, yeah, that would be to step back into the limelight in a way intended to garner sympathy from Minions and INTENTIONALLY piss off bro fans and Wincest shippers alike? How fucking self centred, desperate and disrespectful do you have to be to shit all over the finale of a show that for the most part accepted you and kept you in paid work for 12 years? Well, Misha Collins levels of all of those things, obviously.
So, on the topics of self centred, desperate to stay relevant, attention seeking and being oh so needy, the tweet yesterday from Amazon mentioned Castiel. He wasn’t tagged in it, so I refer to my earlier comment about searching online, because how else would he have possibly seen that? It’s possible someone sent it to him, I appreciate that, but if we go off past behaviour it’s not any stretch at all to believe that didn’t happen. So, once again, having seen the tweet he took it upon himself to - oh so predictably - turn it into something relating to Destiel. When I saw it I immediately rolled my eyes and thought ‘here we go again’, but then also had a little smile because I really liked the fact that he explicitly mentioned Wincest, therefore seeming to accept that his poor old dead horse wasn’t the only one in the race. I actually mentally tipped my hat to him then because it appeared that he’s matured enough to acknowledge by name the ship that predates his inclusion on the show. Great, I thought, this is a positive thing in a sea of negativity surrounding the man and his sunken ship, because what followed was Wincest trending in the US (it may also have been other countries as well but I had to sleep!) … largely due to the fact that Hellers were responding to it, calling him out on mentioning the dreaded ‘W’ word. I’ll repeat that because it’s been a rare occurrence up to that point… the Minions were actually disappointed with their overlord for mentioning another ship. We all know what they think of it and I for one, don’t give a flying fuck about their opionion. Ship and let ship, it’s all fun (or meant to be) so we have different tastes, that’s life kiddiwinks, deal with it. I mean, you really don’t have much of an example set for you when your king has proven several times over to be one of the biggest obnoxious brats out there, but just give it a try for your own sakes, yeah? Awesome, good on you, besties!
An unexpected development - to my joy and that of other Wincest shippers - them doing that got the topic trending, only *kept* trending by the fact that were all coming online asking why it was trending. Wincest shippers barely lifted a finger, we just flooded each other’s timelines with lovely content and basked in the Hellers - and Misha - shooting themselves in the foot, which was awesome. But did the vitriol stop? No. Did he get the attention he so clearly craves? Yes. Was it in the way he wanted? Fuck no, so poor, emotionally wounded baby backtracked after seeing that his name was trending alongside Wincest because that’s *so* not what someone narcissistic to do it in the first place, wanted.
Now here’s where I could easily have just moved on with an unusually fond chuckle, giving him an ironic pat on the back and a ‘thanks, Misha’ for being the one to instigate hours of fun, but once again his despicable behaviour made that impossible. It’s been more than obvious for many years that he cares more about what his fans think than anything else to do with the show and the fandom in a larger sense, but to delete the tweet and APOLOGISE for daring to be so insensitive to the snowflakes’ delicate sensibilities for mentioning Wincest in the first place was absolutely disgusting. Stating , “I used a term that I had never really given any thought to other than, "that's a thing?! Yuck." is not only complete and utter bullshit, it’s pandering of the highest order.
We all know he has referred to Wincest on multiple occasions, so to say he hadn’t thought about is a flat out lie, which IMO is an insult to everyone, not just Wincest shippers. Does the man have no self respect at all, why would you contradict yourself in the face of such overwhelming evidence? Instead of either ignoring all the people calling him out, or addressing it with another tweet saying ‘yeah, that happened’ or something similar he chose, I repeat, CHOSE the route of claiming he didn’t realise he was being offensive to people who felt ‘triggered’ by him using the word Wincest. He basically shat all over an entire ship and large sector of the fandom in an attempt to appease his own fan base which consists of a lot of children (or those that act like children) who have no idea what RL is like.
Once again, he’s reinforced the idea that if you shout loud enough at someone just because you don’t like something they said, they will back down and apologise for something even when there’s nothing to apologise for. If he wants to be such a role model then he could easily have pointed out that a fictional ship doesn’t condone RL incest, any ACTUAL trauma people have suffered because of RL situations, and made an effort to make sure people understand that. He COULD have used it as an opportunity to do some good in the fandom by encouraging people to build bridges, to accept that people are entitled to their beliefs and that sometimes we see things differently but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t treat others with BASIC HUMAN DECENCY because of it. Instead he YET AGAIN chose to show that he cares more about what Minions think of him, keeping them onside to constantly stroke his unbelievably fragile ego in everything he does.
It is my understanding that Misha is big on (or claims to be big on) putting positive energy out into the world, treating people with respect, helping others and accepting people for who they are, not who you want them to be… all this after YEARS of consistently practising what he preaches only when it suits him. He sends out a message that it’s perfectly OK to bully, to spread hate, to draw attention to yourself at the cost of others, to throw colleagues and friends under the bus and at the same time use them to further your own agenda and get hits for your YouTube channel. Is this really the legacy he wants to leave? Is this an environment he wants his own kids to grow up in as well as future generations? Is this what he thinks is a valuable contribution as a human being? JFC, the arrogance, hypocrisy and the need for constant validation this man exhibits is nothing short of cringeworthy… actually it’s beyond that. It’s deplorable behaviour, it’s not new, and he will continue to act like this for as long as he’s being enabled and this harmful cycle needs to end.
I have friends IRL and online who are (now, possibly, were) big Misha fans, who have supported him from either the beginning of his run on the show, or since they started watching, and this is how he repays this behaviour? He’s willfully alienating decent people (including multishippers) all to make himself look good by being seen to do everything he can not to offend people. Spoiler alert, you DID offend people, you continue to do so time and again and we’ve had enough. I can’t imagine how exhausting it must be to be such a perpetual people pleaser, but let me say it’s not doing you any favours in any way, shape or form.
Misha, you are *not* a role model, you’re *not* someone to look up to when you can't live up to the ideals you preach. You’re spitting in the face of people who have supported you even after some questionable things in the past, who gave you the benefit of the doubt because we’re all human and we all make mistakes. The key to growing as a person is not to keep repeating the same mistakes over and over, understanding *why* what you said and/or did was a mistake and making a concerted effort to make changes. I don’t ever see you doing that, you will continue down this path of only caring about Minions under the guise of caring for people in general. You are transparent, you are sad and despite the fact I’ve never particularly liked you, I didn’t speak up because I didn’t want to get involved in the drama. Well now I have spoken up and I’m saying you’re a disgrace, you have no respect for other people and nobody is fooled anymore. If it hadn’t been this tweet it would have been something else, but I for one am glad it happened so soon after the show ended so we can finally be rid of the limpet-like behaviour. It’s over, let it go for the sake of what dignity you might have left, for the sake of your family and friends and for the sake of anyone who isn’t capable of seeing through your ‘it’s a joke’ mentality.
You have been weighed, you have been measured and you have been found wanting. Fuck you and the horse you rode in on, Misha.
For anyone who made it to the end of my ramble, thank you. This has been a cathartic exercise and I’m drawing a line under it now, I don’t think I could possibly make my thoughts any clearer. I urge you not to get caught up in any petty squabbles with his Minions, let’s celebrate J2 and other cast and crew members who have shown us all respect and who I am proud to call part of the SPN family. There’s always one member of the family who needs to be frozen out for the good of everyone else.
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Always remember Pillarmen-lovers and followers alike, no matter what you like to wear or what you like to put on your body; you are absolutely stunning! 😍😍😍 You rock those tattoos, piercings, whatever you wear; wear them with your head held high! 😇🥰😘 Don't let anyone tell you otherwise!
The Pillarmen with a Female s/o with tattoos (who also gets unwanted comments about them)...
(Under the cut for length!)
Kars:
• At first, Kars doesn't quite understand the exact appeal of tattoos.
• Sure, some of them admittedly looked nice and they were art in their own respect, but they were also known to be quite painful for Humans not to mention they were something very permanent to put on the body...
• He doesn't really understand why someone would go out of their way to get something so gaudy imprinted on their skin.
• You'll have to forgive him because when you're first getting to know him as he openly looks down on you for having some of your own; especially since you're a Woman.
• He states that you should treat your body like a temple and not "graffiti" it with something so "manish" and "distasteful" which you of course simply shrug off.
• You've heard this enough times to not care.
• However, after you give him some time and he's heard any stories you happen to have behind your tats or perhaps once he sees how truly harmless it all is, he comes around.
• Kars comes to realize that they're just another piece of what made you "you" and he supposed that you could be into far worse things than just simple pictures drawn on your skin...
• Besides... he has to admit you look very beautiful with them.
• From that moment on, if anyone happens to say anything negative about your ink, he puts haters and nay-sayers alike in their place.
• "You know, it's not very ladylike to have tattoos." You could feel the sneer of the Woman behind you as she let her poisonous words drip off her tongue but you didn't turn around.
• This wasn't the first time this happened and it was better to pretend you didn't hear.
• Kars, on the other hand, didn't miss a beat. "It's also not very ladylike to make bitchy comments but it appears that would just be your whole personality." He commented, cocking an eyebrow at the now gawking Woman from over his shoulder.
• You couldn't contain the snort of laughter that burst forth, Kars smiled softly as you clung to his arm with a wheeze. The offending Woman didn't make anymore comments.
• Kars was sure that if he could open his mind to see the beauty of tattoos and learn to accept them, others should do the same.
Esidisi:
• Hands down, Esidisi absolutely ADORES your tattoos!
• He thinks they're a beautiful form of art to display on the body and that they are something definitely to be admired.
• Most especially since they're on you!
• Even from the first time you two met, he wanted to see every single one you had and hear any stories you happened to have behind them.
• Even if the stories happened to go along the lines of "I got really drunk with some friends and--"
• For quite a while he's wanted to get tattoos of his own but never really found the time, not to mention something worthwhile to get.
• Millennium ago, tattoos were in fact quite time consuming to get done (they required not only a steady hand but the patience of a Saint as well) and he couldn't waste much time when on the hunt for the Aja afterall.
• However, once introduced to the modern tattooing art and with lots of time to spare, you were what inspired him to step up and finally get a few of his own done!
• What he really wants is to get his arms covered in intricate patterns and pictures.
• In fact, Esidisi is the kind of person to want to get a matching tattoo with you or at least one with your name somewhere on his body.
• Of course, he does not stand for anyone saying anything hurtful or negative about your own tats.
• "Hey!" The yelling of the guy calling out to you from his truck as you walked down the street instinctively made you freeze for only half-a-second. "I'd fuck you if you didn't have so many tattoos, bitch!"
• His words made an ickyness swirl up from your gut to your throat. Though disgusted, you kept your face carefully neutral and tried to keep walking.
• Those kinds of deragatory comments just weren't worth the effort of fighting back.
• Esidisi, however, wasn't one to stand back and let someone disrespect you like that.
• "Yeah? And maybe somebody would actually fuck you if you had some, dickhead!" He called back, grinning as the guys mouth immediately snapped shut.
• The Pillarman's quick clap-back was enough to make a huge smile stretch across your face; only fueled by the massive hand wrapping around yours as you both kept walking.
• With Esidisi around, you would never have to waste time or energy on derogatory comments ever again.
Wamuu:
• Wamuu had only seen these "tattoos" a handful of times in his life.
• He was well aware of the art and the practice took to create them but never had them done on himself or seen the action up close.
• The very few times he had seen tattoos on someone, it was for battle purposes.
• Most often worn by great Warriors who had fought many fights and had them done to commemorate victories won or even lives lost.
• Upon meeting you and spotting your ink, Wamuu was immediately under the impression that you were a Female Warrior (a rarity) and wanted to know everything about the tapestry of "victories" on your skin.
• "This tattoo, what is its symbolism? Was this to commemorate a fight? Battle, perhaps?" He questioned, a calloused finger poking you softly in your flesh as he spoke.
• You could only blink stupidly, not quite sure what he was going on about. "Wamuu... that's Hello Kitty."
• When you explain to him that your tattoos hold no great "symbolism" or "battle tributes" it takes a while for him to wrap his head around it.
• People nowadays did this... for fun? Simply "because"? Sometimes they did it to show love or appreciation to something?
• It was a strange phenomenon but he eventually finds himself nodding his head in understanding.
• If anything, even if it isn't for a Warriors devices, he finds all tattoos unique and something to behold.
• He even starts thinking about getting one of his own simply "for fun".
• What he still doesn't understand is why there are so many people who were so closed minded concerning these things, especially towards Women like yourself.
• He doesn't appreciate it when people are rude or disrespectful to the things you like; this being no exception.
• "Ugh! You should really cover those up!" You turned your head to find another Woman pointing accusingly at one of your tattoos, an ugly scowl etched into her face. "I shouldn't have to see something so distasteful!"
• You opened your mouth, prepared to tell her to mind her business and keep going about your own when suddenly Wamuu appeared right behind her. The massive man sternly pulled a bag right over her head, completely covering her face.
• "If you do not like the look of them, then perhaps you should simply cover your eyes, Human!" He growled, leaving the rude lady to try and pull the bag off her head as he took your hand and proudly walked off with you.
• Now if only everyone could live that philosophy, life would truly be peaceful for you. Until then, you were just happy you had Wamuu to spread those words of wisdom for you.
Santana:
• Upon first meeting you, your tattoos intrigued Santana more than anything.
• He had never really seen anything of the like before encountering you.
• At first, he thought that they were simply a born pigmentation to your skin. Perhaps you were a different kind of Human alltogether? Did this hold some sort of direct link to your kind attracting a Mate?
• If the latter by chance, he had to say it was working.
• You couldn't help but laugh, watching as he traced his fingers along the shapes and pictures of your ink; he was absolutely mesmerized by the artwork stretching across the canvas of your skin.
• This was definitely MUCH more preferable than someone looking down their nose at you for having them.
• However, once you explained to him that you had them physically drawn onto your skin with ink and needles it only intrigued him more.
• He wanted to know everything about these "tattoos" including just how they were done and why exactly some people took time to get them.
• This resulted you dragging him along to a tattoo parlor so he could watch and learn first hand; which then lead to Santana getting his first tattoo shortly after on his thigh.
• "Aww, now what's a pretty girl like you doing with something so ugly like that on her skin?" The lady behind the counter who was ringing up your items smiled almost sickeningly sweet as she spoke, making you only want to roll your eyes even more.
• Oh boy, here it comes. You just couldn't walk to the store to get a bag of chips and a drink without someone making a comment, could you?
• "You know, not a lot of men like those on a pretty girl, sweetie." She continued, as if unable to see you had no interest in what she had to say what-so-ever. "Maybe you should think about that if you ever want to find someone decent, hmm?"
• Santana's wild head of hair appeared out from behind the chip rack as she spoke, lips twisting as his eyebrows narrowed. He approached the counter with a huff, snatching the bag from it as he full on glared at the cashier.
• His eyes fell onto your bare skin, to the lovely shapes and colours that sparked all these unwanted comments. "Her skin is beautiful." He said, before his eyes fell onto the cashiers bare skin, his lips only pushing further downwards. "Your skin is boring, primitive."
• The look on the cashiers face after he said that only made your snacks taste even sweeter as you sat cuddled into the Pillarmans side back at Home.
#funnybunny#pillarmen#pillarmen headcanons#kars#esidisi#wamuu#santana#kars x reader#esidisi x reader#wamuu x reader#santana x reader#my writing
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moving this to my new blog so I can pin it again lol
@stregoni-benefici you are completely correct but I just wanted to expand on this a little bit - also i’m putting this under a read more cause this got a lot longer than i originally thought it would be
sexism: smeyers treatment of female characters throughout the entire series is extremely problematic. like you don’t even need to read deep into the books to see that. the backstories of all her female characters all involve some form of trauma and are significantly more violent than the male vampires (Rosalie and Esme enduring physical/sexual assault meanwhile Edward dies of the flu and Emmett gets vibe checked by a bear).
she also creates the idea that a woman isn’t complete without children/being a mother. every female vampire in the series is desperate for children yet can’t, its mentioned in pretty much every book and extreme emphasis is placed on how tragic this is. a female character wanting children isn’t wrong or sexist at all but the way its written in twilight makes it seem like its something a woman has to do in order to be happy and smeyer pretty much cements this idea by making Bella suddenly desperate to have Renesmee despite showing no interest in children/audibly voicing her thoughts against having children in eclipse and the start of breaking dawn (i’m pretty sure Bella has a line of dialogue in the books where she says something like she didn’t realise it was something she wanted/needed until it happened bit I’m not sure I try not to read/think about breaking dawn)
there’s also the way she writes female characters, specifically Rosalie. its mentioned throughout the series that Rosalie has extreme mechanical skills and multiple degrees in STEM fields but its barely ever shown, and instead her characterisation focuses on being obsessed with her looks (first couple pages of this, written by smeyer for new moon), and being a ‘stereotypical bitch’. for the first three books most of her character/dialogue is based on being cold and rude to Bella. She is unnecessarily painted as the villain for having different views on Bella (quite literally) giving up her life and future to be with a man (which is a whole other can of worms). the same is done to the character of Leah in eclipse/breaking dawn. Leah is a woman in the Quileute Tribe, she has been severely affected by the Cullen’s presence in the area and is painted as a character that the reader is supposed to dislike simply because she doesn’t like Bella/the Cullen’s despite having extremely valid reasons not to
anti-Native - smeyers treatment of native tribes is horrendous. she has profited fr years off of of native american culture for years and has done so without any acknowledgements. furthermore, she also demonises native american teens (especially in new moon) by calling them wild, violent, dangerous and out of control and then uses these stereotypes to create a contrast between the self control and patience of the Cullen’s and make them seem more like the good guys, and the wolf pack being lesser. She does this again with the treatment of Jacobs character in new moon and especially eclipse.
Jacob starts off in new moon as Bella’s best friend. he helps Bella come out of a severe depression caused when Edward left at the start of the book. however in eclipse his character makes a complete flip and he becomes moody, temperamental, argumentative and disrespectful of Bella’s boundaries. his character becomes unrecognisable and despite smeyers claims of a love triangle, it is obvious what the outcome will be. I have seen countless instances of people on this site claiming they hate Jacob because he is a dick/disrespectful/just as unhealthy as Edward. this was done on purpose by smeyer as she uses Jacob to make Edward seem like the obvious and correct choice for Bella. if you need more proof of this, take the scene where Jacob kisses Bella without her consent and she breaks her hand when punching him, Edward swoops in and almost gets into a fight with Jacob for touching Bella without her consent. this is an obvious attempt to make Jacob seem like the villain and Edward the white saviour
there’s also the treatment of the native characters by the white characters in the books. multiple times in the series, the native characters are called/compared to dogs/brutes and have a distinct unpleasant smell. I don’t think I need to explain how this is racist. the pack also helps the Cullen’s/saves Bella’s lives and never receive any acknowledgement/are treated any better by the Cullen’s/anyone really. the pack are only ever used as a way to make the Cullen’s look better.
there’s also some pretty obvious similarities to colonisation with the Cullen’s entering Quiluete lands which then forces them to start phasing into wolves (and I’m pretty sure none of the pack actually want to start phasing). also, remember Leah? the only female member of the wolf pack? because of the change she effectively can’t have children? that has implications.
and to top it all off, after doing all that, smeyer has never once addressed this or even acknowledged the Quileute Tribe.
pedophilic - I mean even without mentioning breaking dawn its pretty awful. first of all you’ve got the blatant sexualisation of minors throughout the entire series. Edward is 17 throughout the series and smeyer is writing literal paragraphs about his chiselled abs. Jacob is 16/17 when she has him running about forks topless with a 6 pack. this is way more apparent in the movies but its still a huge issue in the books and lead to Taylor Lautner being confronted by adult fans trying to get him to sign their underwear, and being forced into being shirtless for most of the movies which made him extremely uncomfortable (Elizabeth Reaser (Esme) briefly talks about this in the ID10T podcast on spotify). and just as a reminder, Taylor was 16 when the first one was filmed and 17 for the second.
Breaking Dawn is a whole other can of worms. the glaringly obvious issue is Jacob imprinting on a literal newborn baby. now the concept of imprinting itself has racist elements to it, but its heavily implied in the series that imprinting will inevitably lead to a romantic relationship. Jacob imprinting on Renesmee and waiting until she is old enough to enter into a romantic relationship (never mind the fact that shes ‘old enough’ she will still technically be 5) is pretty much grooming. The same happens with Quil and his imprint, Claire (a two year old) where I’m pretty sure there’s a scene in breaking dawn where Jacob and Leah are watching Quil play with Claire and talking about how Quil isn’t going to date anyone because he and Claire are ‘pretty much inevitable’ (i might be wrong though, like I said I try not to read/think about breaking dawn)
smeyer has also written a spin off book (its like 250 odd pages) called the short second life of Bree Tanner (Bree is that newborn vampire killed after the battle in eclipse by the Volturi btw). In this book, Bree is 15 almost 16, and another character Diego is 18 which is definitely pushing the boundaries of ok. (also as a side note, funny how Bree and Jacob are literally the same age and smeyer states multiple times how Bree deserved better and is only a child (who straight up kills people), yet when it comes to Jacob he has to be a responsible adult and is vilified for every mistake he makes)
racist - smeyer refused to let Catherine Hardwicke (director of the first twilight) have a diverse cast because she ‘imagined them a certain way’ (white) and it was a fight to get Edi Gathegi cast as Laurent and had to compromise with smeyer to make Bella’s friend group more diverse. this woman straight up refused to hire more diverse actors and only agreed to when they were side characters/villains.
Also in the official companion book/guide to twilight, smeyer literally writes that vampire venom makes you white
‘the venom leeches all pigmentation from the skin into a more indestructable vampire form…regardless of original ethnicity a vampires skin will be exceptionally pale’ (official illustrated guide pg.69)
this is a whole lot of bullshit cause she is literally whitewashing characters, but when you pair this with the idea that vampires possess inhuman levels of beauty it becomes extremely problematic and implies that being pale/white is more beautiful than darker skin tones.
also, if we go back to Laurent’s character for a second. so Laurent is one of the only characters who isn’t described as white (in the books he is described as having a pale olive skin tone) and in the first book he comes across as pretty reasonable (warning carlisle about James/Victoria, travels up to Denali and tries out the veggie lifestyle) but in new moon, his characterisation pulls a 180° (sensing a theme here) and is suddenly trying to kill Bella as a favour to Victoria and is Evil™ despite in the first book he literally says to Carlisle he didn’t particularly like travelling with James/Victoria and was only really doing it for convenience. where did this undying loyalty come from? yet again, smeyer is completely disregarding established characterisation in POC characters specifically to villainise them.
and finally, we have Jasper. for some reason (that reason being that she is racist) smeyer decides to make Jasper a confederate soldier in his human life. if you don’t have a lot of knowledge on the american civil war, the confederacy were the side of the US that seceded from the union in order to keep their slaves. Jasper was a confederate soldier, and not just any soldier, but a major. Jasper was a major in an army that fought for 4 years to keep the existence of slavery (and don’t even try to say that slavery wasn’t the root cause of the civil war. states rights aye? states rights to do what). now there’s an argument out there made by certain fans that a lot of people joined the confederate army out of pride/were forced into it cause of conscription to try and head canon the racism away but like that doesn’t matter. there was literally no need to make jasper a confederate in the first place. if she was so desperate to have a civil war vampire then she could have made him a member of the union. its been common knowledge that the confederacy was racist for a long time now, smeyer has absolutely no excuses here.
a lot of these issues overlap and I have probably missed heaps of issues (so feel free to add on) but hope this helps explain why smeyer can *ahem* get tae absolute fuck
#smeyer deserves jail#writing this pissed me off so much brb im off to buy a dartboard and a coloured printer#twilight#anti-smeyer#twilight renaissance#twilight resurgance#twilight revival#dont fucking buy midnight sun#edward cullen#jacob black#bella swan#the cullens#wolf pack#jasper whitlock#jasper hale
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