#This is an interesting experience
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So this, two illustrations to chapter 15 of the fanfiction Winter of the author @numbr2-pencil
#I like this fanfiction#I am very glad that I was allowed to make illustrations on this fanfiction#This is an interesting experience#Therefore#while I am free from study and work#I will do exactly this#frollo#illustration for fan fiction#the hunchback of notre dame#judge claude frollo#judge frollo#claude frollo#disney villains#oc art#oc#original character
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I love when I make rash decisions
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#astro rants#Vent? Ish?#/pos#Kind of#Im anxious but its not that bad??? Idfk were trying#This is an interesting experience#Shaking Z rn
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anya deserved so much better
#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#mouthwashing art#mouthwashing anya#ibon draws#cw eye strain#eye strain#just in case#massive trigger warning for people interested in the game 😭i myself had to just listen to a video summarizing it#because i don't do well with heavy games like that especially as a survivor and someone with cptsd myself#the way in which she was systematically failed and gaslit by the others even after the fact felt eerily similar to what i experience#'in the back of my mind it's always there' how it feels to have cptsd in the aftermath is so realistically depicted by anya- i can confirm#take care of yourselves ok <3 i wish us all healing and safety
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I've seen a good number of people ask a question along the lines of "why do characters like Falin and hate Laios when they're so similar?" and i've also seen good analysis on the differences in how the touden siblings carry themselves that would, despite their shared traits, make a person gravitate to one more than the other.
But i feel like we've overseen one very central thing here.
People don't like Falin
Like... the average person in dungeon meshi doesn't like Falin. She was deeply ostrasized by her home village, in magic school she had zero friends before Marcille and the others generally saw her as strange and a bit offputting.
Characters like Namari and Chilchuck like her well enough but not necessarily more than any other member of their party, including Laios. Neither Kabru nor his party think much of her. The canaries don't give a fuck about her. Toshiro's retainers don't see her as anything else than the weird foreign girl their boss has a crush on.
The reason we think everyone loves Falin is because, despite all the indifferent side characters, the 2 most important and central characters of the story are Laios and Marcille. Who are NOT representative of the average attitudes to Falin! But necromancy georg number 1 and 2 are our main eyes into the story and they love Falin so much that it colours our perspective of the whole world.
The only side character who qualifies as liking Falin and not Laios is Toshiro (at least at first, as he ends the story on much better terms with Laios) and that says a lot about his character, with him drifting to the quiet Falin precisely because of her oddness but being both uncomfortable with and deeply jealous of Laios' much more open expression of that oddness. Because he's a repressed guy from a culture where etiquette is incredibly important.
But like I said, that's a specific aspect of him, not to the world at large.
Because there's also people that click more with laios than with Falin.
Kabru, for one, who is initially distrustful of laios but clearly also deeply fascinated by him and drawn to him.
Minor spoilers, and you don't have to read too deeply into this, because I don't think Kabru particularly dislikes Falin or anything. But it's interesting that when he talks about his distrust of the toudens in ch.32 he's talking about them both. But his big friendship declaration in chapter 76 is aimed squarely at Laios, he doesn't say "you and your sister" he says "you"
And Senshi!! He instantly clicks with Laios, well before he does so with anyone else in the party– who he also becomes friends with, it just takes a bit longer– specifically because they bond over their shared special interest in monsters!! Senshi is kind towards Falin and cares for her wellbeing, but he also... doesn't know her. The reason he is even here, helping to save her, is because he and Laios bonded over monsters and he wants to help his new friends out!
Of course, the theme of neurodivergent isolation is very present in Laios' story. I'm not denying that. He does turn people off, without meaning to and unable to fully understand why! But so does Falin. And just like there are people who like her despite of or even because of those traits, there are people who do the same with him.
In conclusion: "Average person loves Falin and hates Laios" factoid actually statistical error. Average person is neutral on both Falin and Laios. Georcille, Laiorg and Geoshiro, who live in the dungeon and think over 10,000 Falin-loving thoughts a day, are statistical outliers adn should not have been counted.
#dungeon meshi#laios touden#falin touden#yes dungeon meshi is a story about the neurodivergent experience (and many many other things)#but through that lens it is also basically autistic wishfullfillment#where people come to see and appreciate you for who you are and your specific special interest is tantamount to saving the world!#and so OF COURSE the two most obviously autistic characters are going to have people who deeply care about them#both despite and because of their autistic traits!!
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The 8 Senses
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The Autistic Teacher
#the 8 senses#sight#smell#taste#touch#hearing#proprioception#interoception#it’s interesting that neurodivergent individuals experience these differently#feel free to reblog#The Autistic Teacher (facebook)
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Poppy playtime got a guy worse than William Afton
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#springtrap#william afton#harley sawyer#fnaf 3#poppy playtime#poppy playtime doctor#poppy playtime chapter 4#So I saw the new poppy playtime chapter#and I think the plot and characters finally worked for me#really sparked my interest#I DONT love all the directions that chapter takes#but can we all talk about how cool the doctor is#AND BY that I mean how truly twisted he is#William’s crimes somehow feel small now#in the face of the company that just experiments on just kids#the doctor is awful in every way sick and twisted#and I think that’s epic#just the idea of William hearing the shit playtime co got up to#like I think the scale of it would genuinely shock him#even if he’s interested in that science as well#I may draw a lil more poppy stuff as a treat we’ll see
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I politely ask for more of the vague modern AU art :3 they're so silly I LOVE them
They’re playing sister location, specifically night 4
#this is from real experience#me and my sister had to give up playing the game because that’s literally just impossible#modern aus are great bc what do you mean I can project my interest onto my blorbos#but viktor has spent like at least a few nights attempting to explain fnaf lore to Jayce#maybe even#five nights#my art#ask#arcane#Jayce arcane#jayce talis#viktor arcane#jayvik#jinx arcane
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dungeon meshi & steven universe are in no way a 1:1 and greg and shuro aren’t alike at all but can you imagine for a second if marcille was in pearl’s shoes. if falin sacrificed herself to have a baby with SHURO out of nowhere. the things she would do….. she’d be in western elf jail for the rest of her sad gay life
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AuDHD is so funny sometimes like what do you mean my hyperfixations/special interests will last for years on end or possibly forever but they will cycle out every month or two with absolutely no transitional period or warning. like i will think about the same topic every day obsessively for 46 days in a row and on the 47th day with no visible cause adhd brain goes "ok! bored of that now" and autism brain goes "dw i got something queued up for ya" and i blast into full blown obsession on some other topic whose mental file folders haven't opened in 9 months. brain's out here treating hyperfixations like a crop rotation. once the dopamine runs out it cycles in another one but once something's in the rotation it never ever leaves. last summer we brought in one from when i was 11. it's so funny to me but frustrating too bc like. i cannot stress enough my inability to predict or control this. or how completely abrupt and random it can be
#actually adhd#actually autistic#audhd#aphelion.txt#ik 'adhd brain' vs 'autism brain' is a gross oversimplification especially given how much overlap there can be#but it at least helps me conceptualize wtf is going on in my head when i do this lol#and yeah i'm mostly referring to fandoms in this post but it can happen w more 'Traditional' special interests too#like my linguistics special interest which hasn't popped up in a couple years now but whenever it does#i will fill literal notebooks while studying 4 languages at once and simultaneously inventing a conlang#and then i'll be like Ok that was fun! and several months later im deleting like. 2gb of textbooks off my iphone to make room for an update#And sometimes yeah there is a precipitating event like 'Oh something new happened in X fandom with my blorbo!' but sometimes it's like#yeah. no. idk either. switch got flipped in my brain and X no longer sparks joy. only Y rn. how come it's Y? yeah idk i also wish i knew#i don't think any of this is actually an uncommon experience for people with these types of neurodivergencies it's just.#the severity of abruptness and TOTALITY of the switch that makes me feel like a weirdo sometimes lol#like I'M getting mental whiplash from this sometimes. idk how y'all are still following my blog
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Y'know, there's this gripe I've had for years that really frustrates me, and it has to do with Love, Simon and people joking about it and calling it too-pg and designed-for-straight-people and all the like. (A similar thing has happened to Heartstopper, but that's another conversation.)
I saw Love, Simon in theaters when it came out my senior year in high school. I saw it three times, once with my friends/parents on opening night, once with my brother over spring break, and once with my grandparents.
On opening night, the air in the room was electric. It was palpable. Half the heads in there were dyed various colors. Queer kids were holding hands. We were all crying and laughing and cheering as a group. My friends grabbed my hands at the part where Simon was outed and didn't let go until his parents were saying that they accepted him. My friend came out to me as non-binary. Another person in our group admitted that she had feelings for girls. It was incredible. I left shaking. This was the first mainstream queer romance movie that had ever been produced by one of the main five studios, and I know that sounds like another "first queer character from Disney" bit but you have to understand that even in 2018 this was groundbreaking. Getting to have a sweet queer rom-com where the main character was told that he got "to breathe now" after coming out meant so much to me and my friends.
But also, from a designed-for-straight-people POV (which, to be frank, it was written by a bisexual author and directed by a gay man, this was not designed for straight audiences), why is it a bad thing that it appealed to the widest possible audience? That it could make my parents and grandparents see things in a new light? My stepdad wasn't at all interested in rom-coms but he saw it with me because it was something I cared about and he hugged me when we came out of the theater. My very Catholic grandparents watched it with me and though my grandpa said he still didn't quite understand the whole 'gay thing,' all he wanted was for me to be happy and to have a happy ending like Simon did. My Nana actually cried when Simon came out and squeeze my hand when his mother told him he could breathe.
And when Martin blackmailed Simon, my mom, badass ally that she is, literally hissed "Dropkick him. Dropkick him in the balls" leading to multiple queer kids in the audience to laugh or smile. Having my parents there- the only parents, by the way, out of my group of queer and questioning friends- made multiple people realize that supportive adults were out there. That parents like those in Love, Simon do exist in real life.
When people complain about Heartstopper not being realistic or Love, Simon being too cutesy, I remember seeing Love, Simon on opening night. I remember my friend coming out and my stepdad hugging me and my mom defending us through this character. I remember the cheers that went through the audience when Bram and Simon kissed and the chatter in the foyer after the movie was over and the way that this movie made me understand that happy endings do exist.
Queer kids need happy endings. Straight people need entry points to becoming allies. Both of these things can come together in beautiful ways. They can find out about more queer culture later, but for now, let them have this. Let them all have a glimpse at a better, happier world. Let them have queer joy.
#love simon#simon vs thsa#simon spier#spierfeld#bram greenfeld#my experiences#meta#the importance of queer joy#heartstopper#becky albertalli#my mom also watched rwrb with me last year when it premiered#and let me tell you that was interesting sitting in the room with her for an r-rated romance movie like that
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not "i ship these characters" or "i want them to bond platonically" but a secret 3rd thing (I want them to be forced to interact by the Narrative bc they would HATE that)
#who needs romance when i can watch two narrative foils painfully tolerate each other's existence#bonus points if they are forced to Work Together To Solve A Problem#and they end up working surprisingly well together!#they make a surprisingly effective team!#they even confide some backstory with each other & bond a bit & understand each other better#and when it's all over they shake hands & amicably agree that they still cannot fucking stand each other#'this was an interesting sidequest & I'm glad we got to experience it.#but all things considered i genuinely never want to see your face again'#Enemies to Chained-Up-In-An-Abandoned-Bathroom-Together#to Enemies#two stray cats forced to share a cat carrier for a trip to the vet
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Sex positivity is also about not calling Ace people prude and using virgin as an insult 👍 hope that helps
#sex positivity is also respecting sex lives that dont look like yours#or lack thereof#and insulting people by saying they dont fuck make you sound stupid <3#im sorry i just cant take people who use their sex lives as a flex seriously its just not my thing!#like yea having lots of kinky sex is cool but not having sex and not being interested by sex is also cool#one is not better than the other the human experience is just very varied and diverse#its normal you wont understand everyone your brain isnt even made to comprehend how many human there are in the world#but we should all have spaces to navigate our sex lives as we wish even if that means interacting with sex as a subject as little as possibl
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People who love you shouldn't make you feel ashamed of your interests and hobbies. What you enjoy is wonderful, even if it's uncommon, complicated, stereotypical, etc. Please keep sharing your lovely energy with the world.
#des posts#hobbies#interests#special interests#hyperfixation#shame#shame reduction#suggestions#suggestion blog#desultory suggestions#mental health#mental wellness#self care#healing#wellness#trauma recovery#trauma#past trauma#recovery#traumatic experiences
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#mole interest#last post i make i promise#this one goes out to everyone consistently participating to blow the experiment up
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god gives his most niche fandoms to his most autistic warriors
#and i wish he would fucking STOP#autism#autistic#actually autistic#autistic experiences#neurodivergent#neurodiversity#special interest#My niche fandoms no one else knows/cares abt >#The Hollow#The Wilds#Renegade Nell#Playdead Inside#Unwind#The Endling#Wolfblood#Descendants#Joshua and The Promised Land#< /hj#First Kill#School Spirits#if u are in these fandoms PLS interact i will be ur best friend pls#non alterhuman post#anti rq#anti radqueer#anti transid#anti proship#anti prat
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