#These arent fun psychosis either

[satan-lovesfags]

Remember when people that didn't like ya would just look at your page or profile on a device? Just do that, this whole tin can line with everything that has a signal is getting really really weird. My grandpa that couldn't have lived long enough to meet me knows too much about my life lmao, what are your ghosts seeing y'all do? 🤣

I mean if you care about Internet traffic you're all set to make money and everything. Hell I might do it to talk shit about videos and whatever else and see if it works at all. (I remember the drug tags always having bitches getting paid to be naked or in underwear just doing drugs. But here we are....with nothing....)

[caffeinatedopossum]

Why are there always new symptoms showing up?? I just want a fucking break ;-;

[abimee]

i get where posts are coming from when they talk about the, i dont know what better way to example them besides ''weird/strange disorders'' people are often adverse to, and in ways that try to make them palatable/less scary like ''oh my friend who hears voices actually enjoys them and she finds comfort in them'' and doing things in a way to mitigate the fear of them, even people who have them themselves doing this. but i dont really enjoy that this is the only line that these thoughts go through, of how entertaining or enjoyable these things can be, when i think we do need more understanding of them by demanding the outside participant recognize that theyre not always going to get that feel-good depiction of our disorders

like the best way i can personally put it is yeah some of my disorder symptoms are enjoyable on my part, but a problem with that is when im manic and in a state that makes me feel good i can often become a danger to myself or others because im so hopped up on my own euphoria that i forget consequences and limitations exist, and so often mania is just as bad for me if not worse for me than depression because im incapable of being self aware, critical, realistic, and the mania can often feed into a dangerous mindset teetering me closer to suicide than depression. but mania getting played off as just '' i have so much energy! i got zoomies!" or ''mania is actually really cool because [x]'' when in all actuality of someone like me with insane bipolar swings starts telling you how enjoyable mania is Thats A Bad Sign

or like with the symptoms that float somewhere between my bipolar and ocd. im going to ask for some incredibly insane accomodations or say things that i dont understand may be hurtful because what may be a silly little quirk you do may feel like someone is putting their nails into my skin and dragging them down my back until they draw blood. or i may act offputting because my brain is either trying to tell me that i was destined by god to save you from your relationship, that i have no basis to believe is unhealthy purely besides my brain telling me that because you arent dating me that you are surely in a shitty relationship, or the complete opposite where im certain you are in fact only in my life to steal my friends and make a mockery of me by long conning me into getting close to you and revealing information for you to put out and get me hunted down and killed like an animal for, even thought there is no such information besides my brain telling me There Might Be and I just forgot

and to have friendships and close relationships with people similar to me is to have to not only respect back but understand that youre not going to get the feel good caretaker shit where my bipolar actually makes me a fun and interesting person to be around or my comorbid ocd actually makes me a really safety orientated person, it means youre going to have to watch me just directly not say some things to you on a discord call because i think were being recorded by secret agents and me asking you to come pick me up a 3 mile drive away randomly because i tried taking a vacation but psyched myself into believing im going to die if i dont get back home and i need to get home NOW. like i get positivity posts about the ''scary/weird'' disorders have their time and place but when all i see is people trying to make us palatable i wonder if even people like me who are defined and live day by day with their neurosis would be included because we exemplify some of many reasons why these disorders are in the neurodivergence category, one defined by the fact that we dont need medication and to be ''cured'' as much as we need the world around us to learn to accomodate us and accept us without trying to change us.

and theres people more severe than me! certainely! im only in the medium to extreme range of bipolar being youthful and not experiencing more psychosis symptoms, but even i can be offputting and upsetting to others purely by thr way my bipolar has wired me, and i wonder if IM considered ''too much'' for people how my siblings who need 24 hour round clock assistance and care to live will be treated and if the people who wanna de-fang disorders can accept those people as friends and family and closed ones. this also goes into stuff like how we can pass these disorders onto their kids, and what if your child is the violent stereotype? what if the voices arent nice? what if your child cant be left alone with a babysitter or anybody besides a select set of people without freaking out? what then

[spoonbenders-archive]

i shldnt eavesdrop on random ppl's beef abt psychological disorders but its so funny when ppl waffle abt delusional attachments and invent teenagers to get mad at over it . idk how to explain to the "d/as were invented by 15 year olds trying to make psychosis fun" crowd that attachments arent always fucking fun either

[themindelectricdemo4]

i love my oc nanda otsuka cuz hes just lemon demon & earthbound ost + me projecting physical disability onto him. although my issues with my heart are anxiety & panic with poor circulation but he has an actual heart condition. & chose the heart due to the importance of the organ.......& afaik brain transplants arent possible at least not with extreme complications plus the heart fits more because of the gaming motif [lives being represented with hearts] I never got to roleplay him but i really liek his backstory...idk if i ever will so ill just say he had a heart transplant when he was young & spent a lot of his time in the childrens hospital & not being able to go outside very often Did Something to Him(tm) & environmental + genetic factors + stress & fear developed his psychosis so that he's completely & entirely convinced the world is a video game. because of this he has an incredibly poor understanding of consequences because he thinks theyre trivial in the end anyways because of the perpetual game cycle of gain lives, play, die, revived. & hes certain his heart transplant is proof of him moving onto his next life, that he had ran his course with his old one & he died. he still stayed the same person, it wasnt like a past life thing where hes like new me guys ...........if mario dies & moves onto his next life he's still mario u know. but nanda still "died", but nanda also just went to his next life. he doesnt know the exact perimeters for obtaining extra lives if its possible [in his head] but he thinks that he would be able to feel it. & cuz of his he is completely & entirely morally grey. ive described him as a true neutral. hes rather devoid of any values which leads him to just doing whatever he would seem is fun or appropriate in a certain situation or based on mood or really anything. so hes not entirely chaotic, because he isnt against following the rules either. if he sees an ending to obtain, he'll follow through with that. if he wants to achieve a "bad ending" for fun, he'll do that too. he's careless for the made up lives he has in his head. like if theres a balance & you dont put anything on either side, its neutral. but if you put the exact same object with the same weight on both sides, it still stays neutral. nandas the second flavor of true neutral. not going particularly either way vs. encompassing both sides equally. it leads him to being incredibly unpredictable. also he owns a hamster so you know hes swag [he really enjoys rodents & other small animals due to the fact he has been able to own much larger due to its energy & work required. like he still takes amazing care of his hamster but cleaning a space for a hamster vs. cleaning a space for a huge dog is different u know. not trying to say theres no work for taking care of smaller animals]

[eraserheadbabys]

im not diagnosing anyone with anything. im saying, ive had specific delusions like this and seeing people mocking something that i know for a fact ive thought and felt feels like absolute shit. i dont know or care about what these peoples mental health is, but mocking something that is a common symptom of mental illness is ableist no matter who youre mocking. whoever you intend to target, the people you hit are people who experience these.

you should also consider that someone with a tendency towards psychosis can easily be triggered by seeing these theories. we have a huge problem with conspiracy theories, because it is so easy to believe them if youre prone to psychosis. and even if you arent, believing crazy things like this is associated with psychosis. you cant separate that societal association. not everyone in these groups will br psychotic, but the beliefs and behaviors are still associated with psychosis. mocking them hurts psychotic people on the sidelines. i am saying this as a psychotic person who saw this and was upset to see something i experience being the subject of a joke.

i could use the example of not understanding sarcasm, jokes and social nuance: this is a symptom common in autistic people but not exclusive to us. its still ableist to mock anyone for needing these things clarified. whether youre autistic or not, it isnt ok to make fun of others you see experiencing this

and no, i dont care what your mental health is either. even if youre psychotic it doesnt give you a free pass to mock symptoms associated with psychosis in strangers, same as how its ableist to mock people for misunderstanding sarcasm and jokes even if you yourself are autistic

not to be controversial but sometimes I think the private personal lives of celebrities are in fact none of our business

[lesbianakaashi-archived]

a while back i said i was going to write out all the reasons i don't like melanie martinez and her music. well, here it is. everything is under the cut, but beware, this includes ableism along with abuse, suicide, and csa/rape mentions. also, uncensored slurs. be safe!

ill be going by songs, starting w the crybaby album, because i don't have much to say about melly herself. thatll be at the end. this is HEAVILY opinion based, so take it all w a grain of salt. 

- crybaby is ok to me, nothing super terrible. 

- dollhouse is the first song i don't like; it presents nothing new, because the whole "abuse/other bad things wrapped in a cute package" thing isn't a new concept. i also don't like the line "i see things that nobody else sees" because yes, while crybaby is a character, shes not said to be psychotic or have hallucinations, and i feel like that line was just thrown in to make her sound "crazy".

- sippy cup is like dollhouses terrible older sibling tbh. within the first verse, we have an ableist slur and plastic surgery shaming. real nice. also "silly girl, with silly boys" just rubs me The Wrong Way(tm). then theres what sounds like romantiziation of eating disorders, which as far as I know, mel doesnt suffer from (if youve heard otherwise, please send me an ask abt it!) sippy cup is basically saying "bad is still bad even if its presented in a good way!!!!" and its just...not good. 

- i don't have any strong feelings about carousel. tbh, it has a nice tune and its actually one of the few decent songs on crybaby. 

- confession time: i LOVE alphabet boy. if i had to pick a melanie song to listen to, itd be alphabet boy. its really catchy and fun to sing (plus im a slut for alliteration,) and i don't have many personal complaints. though i do detest the whole "baby" theme she has, esp in this song. 

- soap is just...eh to me. i really don't like the causal suicide line as someone whos attempted So Many times, and the whole fake-deep thing just amounts to "i fucked up, i feel terrible". 

- training wheels is a CLUSTERFUCK. as i said, i hate the "baby" theme, when mixed with adult stuff. this song is undoubtably about sex and relationships, but shes using things kids can relate to and its just...feels bad, scoob. "i love everything you do, when you call me fucking dumb for the stupid shit i do" is a one-two punch of emotional abuse implications and a slur. its just...all around bad. 

- pity party is...decent. the "im laughing, im crying, it feels like im dying" lines are suspect to me, because they sound very bpd-ish and idk how i feel abt that. 

- tag youre it is just. BAD. mel herself had the ADACITY to say its supposed to be ~whimiscal~, such with crybaby being kidnapped by the "big bad wolf". that may be the story, but putting a song about your childlike character being kidnapped and implied to be raped? is so fucked up.

- milk and cookies is also fucking terrible. "im fucking crazy, need my perscription filled" nice job implying all csa survivors are crazy, melly babe. gg. 

- i dont have strong feelings abt pacify her. just that its some infantilizing bs as usual.

- mrs potato head is somewhat decent? i dont have strong feelings about it either 

- mad hatter, and i know everyone and their mom have said this, is an ableism filled fucker. from the first lines, when i first heard it, i thought it was a harmless alice in wonderland inspired song. cute! and then the next lines played. im gonna go line by line and say what implications/statements bother me. "now i'm peeling the skin off my face" as someone who has pretty severe skin picking issues, this rubs me the wrong way. its basically just there to make crybaby ~weird~ "'cause i really hate being safe" oh, bc safe is SUCH a bad thing to be? this is just a bad line. "the normal, they make me afraid, the crazies, they make me feel sane" holy ableism batman! the normal? like psychotic people arent ~normal~? also, i love (sarcasm) how she says "the crazies". mel, honey, you have no grounds to say that. "i'm nuts, baby, i'm mad / craziest friend that you've ever had / you think i'm psycho, you think i'm gone / tell the psychiatrist something is wrong" do you think mel even thought about how fucking assholeish and downright insensitive she sounds abt mental illness right here? because she sounds like she did one (1) google search about psychosis and wrote down everything she could. "oh, off the bend, entirely bonkers / you like me best when i'm off my rocker / tell you a secret, i'm not alarmed / do what if i'm crazy? the best people are" okay, so, im 99% sure mel is NOT psychotic in the fucking slightest. hey babe, youre not ~crazy~ and you dont get to appropriate our oft reclaimed slurs. this is just. so insensitive and fucked up. 

- cake isn't that bad. i find myself humming it a lot. 

- teddy bear is decent as well, kinda edgy tho. 

- now for the only one of her unreleased songs that bothers me: a million men. (major csa tw for that song) she wrote it after watching a documentuary about sex trafficking and csa, and while its not bad lyrically and a few lines are relatable to my csa survivor ass, but shes not a csa survivor, and i don't feel like she should have written and sang it. 

- my personal problem with melanie is that she has her "crybaby" image all the time. shes tweeted saying she broke her nail trying to open her sippy cup, she poses half naked in bibs with a pacifier, etc. it just feels wrong to me, as i had my childhood and innocence and childhood things torn from me and sexualized very early on in life. 

- so thats all! i may or may not update this if anything else comes up. thank you for reading this far. 

(please be aware that i do not hate melanie as a person, and that i don't wish her any ill will. i just have problems with things shes done. and i am not saying you need to drop her music completely; just be critical and use your brains. and be respectful if someone says it bothers them!)