#Theres Some Stuff I Do Wish Was Improved On

[mumpsetc]

your object show takes are so fucking right all the time i'd love to hear some of ur thoughts about hfjone

SORRY FOR THE DELAY I've Been Busy But Tyyy ^__^

God I Have So Many Thoughts on One Its Difficult to Convey the Sheer Depth Of Some of Them. I Got Like a Fourth of a Video Essay About My Whole "The Death Themes in One" Thing. It's Not a Perfect Work, The Further We Get From When It Aired the More Little Flaws I See But It Just Endears Me to It More Honestly. One is a Series I Respect and Admire So Much, That Sort of Very Genuine Storytelling Where Its Obvious Those Making It Had Clear Goals and Themes in Mind is Stuff I Do Want More Of in the Osc. Imagine How Much More Engaging Shows Could Be if a Sort of Coherent Theme and Tone Was Planned Out Early On Along With the Concept and Characters. I Love You One I Love Youuu One.

[punkitt-is-here]

How can I cultivate the same, "just keeping making stuff all the time" kind of energy you have? It's very impressive and something I wish I could do!

well, theres a couple reasons i think! one is that i just found ways to be satisfied with small amounts of work. its in part because of my ADHD, but my parents were always trying new things (motorcycles, leatherwork, acrylic paint, collage art, photography, video editing) so that definitely rubbed off on me; i had a great example of people just wanting to try stuff. i keep making stuff all the time because i love trying out new things; you don't have to be an expert to try something new! you just have to have a desire for it! wanna make a zine? google it! wanna write a comic? give it a shot! wanna get into woodworking? buy a carving knife and find a stick or something! i think theres plenty of ways to find entry points into interesting stuff and you gotta let yourself be okay with making shit that sucks just because its fun. which leads me to my second point!!

im okay with being dogshit at stuff! i try new things, i kind of suck at them, and i think it's either 1. cool that i made it this far or 2. kinda funny that this is what its like at the moment. i know that sucking is never permanent, everything can be improved with time, and rarely does anyone ever magically get good at something first try. i think of myself as a talented artist, but its over the course of 2+ decades of drawing; im always improving, and no matter what im going to find things i want to get better at, so why fault myself now for not being perfect? a couple of months ago i really wanted to try woodcarving, so i made spoon with my dad. did it turn out great? not really! you cant even use it as a spoon! but im glad i tried it, it was fun, i had a great time with my dad, and now i know a little bit more going in next time. the idea that you have to be perfect or make tangible progress every single time you try something new is a recipe for burnout. i promise you, it doesnt matter if something doesn't come out like God's Gift to Humanity! Did you have fun? did you learn something? are you satisfied in some small part? good!

(pictured: tha spoon)

last, im just really easy to please myself! I'll make a doodle or implement an idle animation in my game or color a piece and go "wow! thats so cool i did that :)" and it really is just a matter of realizing that its fucking COOL to create stuff, no matter how small! whatever you made didn't exist before you, especially in your own unique way, and now it does! doesn't that rule?! i'm obsessed with it! even if its just a stick figure, its a stick figure you made, and it wasn't there before. thats fucking awesome!!! art is so cool!!!! i think that being happy with small goals and victories is a great way of trying out new things and showing off cool stuff u made, no matter what skill level. :) this turned into a whole big thing, but i hope this helps! tl;dr is try things if they seem fun, be okay with not being good at them, and find stuff about it that makes you happy or satisfied!

[dangopango00]

ABYSS RAZOR W LOVE LANGUAGES

Abyss Razor x gn reader

Pt 1 | Pt 2

A/N: I was gonna do loser so hcs but i keep getting annoyed bc i wanna improve my writing but dk what to do bye ANYWAY I JUST CAUGHT UP WITH THE ANIME AND OUEUEU 😭😭😭😭 Im down bad even more they animated the scenes so well hes so kewt

Mostly not established relationship outside of the “as you get closer” sorry im a sucker for the slowburn also oh my god i have to make this two parts why is it so long ill write part two laterrer

GIVING From best to worst (more utc)

1. Acts of Service:

This is his specialty for sure; he just feels as if he has to be useful to you and if he isn’t then you won’t want him anymore. Acts of service are the only thing he can do without stammering or messing up in some way and it’s the only one he’s confident with too. It comes naturally to him tbh he:

- Reminds you of things you need to do even if you only mentioned it to him once in passing

- Brings extra materials or snacks with him if you often forget to bring those things

- Organizes your stuff if he notices your bag and/or your room is messy

- ALWAYS asks if you need help with anything and will do that even if u just tell him to relax he’d instead start trying to help YOU relax

Even as he gets more comfortable with you, excessively partaking in acts of service is something he just can’t shake which isn’t a bad thing! Its his love language afterall, but you just wish he’d stop worrying about if he’s being useful enough and just do what comes naturally. With more reassurance and time he will eventually start to slow down more though.

2. Gift Giving:

I think his gift giving usually comes with his acts of service like bringing snacks. He also just gives you a lot of small gifts because he wants you to know how much you mean to him but he really can’t put it into his words and even if he could theres no way he could articulate it out loud. Some things he gives you includes:

- Origami— I feel like origami is sth he does when he’s bored but even so, he puts the utmost love and care into each of his creations so giving them as gifts is sth reserved for the people closest to him

- Snacks— This one is simple he just cares about u and gets concerned if it seems like u aren’t eating enough or if ur hungry but without food

- A Deck of Cards— ODDLY SPECIFIC but I feel like he’d want you to have one so you and him can play cards even if he forgets his. I think even though he usually plays for Abel he does really enjoy physical games like cards and dominoes etc. like playing cards is how he bonds with people

- Accessories— Now this is RARE bc to him this is reallll bold but under the right circumstances he will give you things like earrings if your ears are pierced or a bracelet or charm (MOST likely the far latter). He sees a lot of accessories that remind him of you and its a little ridiculous, he’ll buy them but because it’s very bold he either won’t give it to you and wait for the “right moment”, give it to someone else to give to you or just leave it somewhere in your room when he’s there

As you grow closer Abyss will get more comfortable with giving you bigger things and will lean more into the accessories when gift giving. He might even feel bold enough to give you the plush he won while koala snotting with Mash.

3. Quality Time:

I was gonna put this one at #2 but I had an epiphany. I fear in the beginning stages Abyss would definitely try to keep you at arms length because of his eye. Oh especially if you met him while he was wearing an eyepatch and didn’t know about his eye; in fact, he feels guilty because he feels like he’s tricking you by being around you at all. Not only this but he has to split his time between you and Lord Abel as well so. However he does feel a little selfish with you and he really does like you so he spends time with you when:

- In the Forest— Just being alone with you in the forest takes the weight of social pressure off of him. It’s almost like the forest is keeping a secret between you and him. He doesn’t have to worry about whether or not people would avoid you seeing you with him nor does he even have to think about his eye or if you’d accept it, he can just live in the moment and enjoy reading with u

- In Classes no one else he knows attends— Similar to the forest it’s like keeping a secret but this time it’s specifically because none of his friends are here to see him acting so selfishly.

- He’s Jealous— Now he wont say anything buttt when he’s jealous Abyss will stick to you like a bad habit although still keeping you at a short distance. He just feels like he needs to be with you atm don’t mind him.

- You Reassure Him— Similarly, when you assure him that you don’t mind his reputation or eye (if you know) it makes him want to be around you more and all of that day he’ll be around you more than usual. He’s so grateful just to have met you and for you to say all that? He’s over the moon; he almost feels like he can finally breathe freely

As time goes on he definitely gets insanely good at this considering he loves being around you and the only thing holding him back is his insecurity. I def think that once you’ve been dating a long time or married he clings to you like crazy and even in the beginning stages once he’s gotten comfortable with you he’d follow you like a lost puppy even though his behavior is more catlike lol

4. Physical Touch:

He’s not very good at touch I’m ngl he can barely form words around you let alone touch you 😭. BUT. He does sometimes put the moves on you without noticing and he does try his best. This would include:

- Playing with ur hair when you’re alone or fixing it if he notices it got a bit messed up

- Fixing/Tidying up ur clothes between classes if he notices sth wrong like you tying your tie wrong or if the way you tied your bow was a little crooked (idk why I just think he’d be insanely good at tying bows/ties I bet he ties Abel’s for him too that boy can NOT tie a tie without it looking a little goofy)

- Resting his hands on your back or shoulders when you hug him. Now this seems like normal behavior but its A LOT for him ok his heart is pounding but he really does enjoy being in your arms

- Patting your head awkwardly or holding your face (if he’s feeling bold) when you’re upset bc he doesn’t know what to do but all he knows is he wants you to feel better and that he misses your smile

As time goes on he slowly gets better with physical touch but honestly he gets better VERY slowly like even if he can handle your advances I’m not sure he’ll be able to initiate things like kissing until marriage LOL ok well thats a bit much but you’ll have to have been in a relationship for a while

(Also a silly little tidbit when he initiates physical touch he gets it from you. For example he holds your face because you’ve held his face before and he never felt more at peace so he wanted to give you that same feeling)

5. Words of Affirmation:

Well. Speaking words isn’t one of his strong suits especially to someone he’s infatuated with. HOWEVER his sincerity is unmatched when he does manage to say something. Usually when he speaks words of affirmation they aren’t direct words of love like “I love you” or anything like that but it is always very sweet. He says things like:

- “Thank you.” — He never stops thanking you and apologizing 😭😭 He just needs you to know that he knows he’s so lucky to have you and that he would never EVER take you for granted

- “It’s an honor” — He says this OFTEN everything he gets to do with you is an honor because he feels as though he doesn’t deserve you; he can’t give you all that you deserve yet you stick by his side with no hesitation? He feels blessed; even wonders if The Lord (tm) Abel has something to do with this. He’s just so happy and most of all, grateful

- “I’m so glad to have met you” — This is one that he often mumbles under his breath when you’re being sweet to him; his feelings just swell in his heart at that moment and he lets it slip from his mouth

- “I need you” — He only said this like one (1) ☝️ time but im running out of words ok ANYWAY he’d say this to you only in critical moments like in the heat of the moment if you had been badly injured and you’re just barely hanging on. Besides this under normal circumstances, he’d say this while asking for your forgiveness after he had been avoiding you for a long time out of insecurity and you’re mad at him

As time goes on he gets MUCH better with words of affirmation and has been consciously making an effort to say more because he doesn’t want you to ever think that he doesn’t love you or isn’t proud of you. It’s so often in your beginning dating stage that he’ll stutter something incomprehensible and then give up and try again later going, “A-about earlier…(incomprehensible stuttering)” (he’s trying to say I love you or I’m proud of you or something similar but he couldn’t quite find the words)

[breadlover64]

BINGQIU VS LIUSHEN/ANY OTHER SHIP WITH SQQ PART 1

BEWARE I HAVENT READ SVSSS IN A WHILE AND I MIGHT’VE MISSED SOME STUFF! Feel free to correct and give your opinions about this.

Theres gonna be two parts to this bc tumblr can’t take all my writing sooooo 😛

In the SVSSS fandom, I’ve noticed that compared to other mxtx’s novels, the mc gets shipped with half of the cast more often and is more widely accepted in the fandom compared to the tgcf and mdzs fandoms (if you ship Hualian or Wangxian with anyone, it will get you death threats, istg 😓). However, with Shen Qingqiu, while of course he gets shipped with his love interests, another really popular one is him with Liu Qingge and many other characters in the novel. I do think this also has to do with the fact that the fandom is more chill than the other two fandoms. Shen Qingqiu in general is just VERY shippable. But why? Why do some people like liushen more than bingqiu? Obviously, I know this is simply a preference, but why do people prefer it more than the canon couple? Well, I have some speculations. First, while I love Bingqiu, I can admit that their relationship is not for everyone; even for me, they’re my least favorite main couple of the three (it's just my opinion, DONT ATTACK ME🙏) because their dynamic can be seen as somewhat toxic. Luo Binghe is very obsessive and kind of yandare like in the novel, and yes, he does have character development and regrets his actions and never really wanted to hurt Shen Qingqiu. I personally don’t feel like we see as much of this development until the very end. At least for me, I feel like we should’ve spent more time with a changed Luo Binghe, and I KNOW he was influenced by Xi Mo. I still didn’t feel completely satisfied with the Luo Binghe arc. I do think we see more of his development in the extras, which is what made me like Bingqiu a lot more, but I just wish we could’ve seen this in the main story instead of optional extras because I think the extras really show Luo Binghe’s growth and his love for Shen Qingqiu in a healthier way. I am aware this boy is very mentally ill. While I’m not a writer, as a reader, I think mxtx could’ve done more for him because he can end up more dislikable for some people and just less appealing of a love interest. I personally LOVE Luo Binghe and how chaotic he is, but again, that is not for everyone, so I can definitely see why some people don’t like him as much. With Shen Qingqiu, this is a bit different. I felt that by the end of the novel he had massive progress and huge development for his character; even if he still has his flaws, you can really tell he has changed and grown throughout the story, but he’s still himself if that makes sense. I felt wayyy more satisfied with his arc than Luo Binghe's; however, I will say that Shen Qingqiu has this sort of shame. While I wouldn’t necessarily call it internalized homophobia, he does have this sort of stigma towards gay people and him being gay himself. And while it can be funny, if you really think about it, even by the end of the novel and in the extras he still has this shame of sleeping with Binghe and showing basic affection, but I won’t really criticize this much because he does improve in this a lot by the extras. By that point, it really feels more like shyness than the shame he felt at the beginning when he first discovered Luo Binghe's feelings. So I will argue that Shen Qingqiu arc is pretty well done and concluded by the end of the book; at least to me, it really did feel like he changed. Okay, so the second reason is because Bingqiu got together when they were both still ‘not at their best’. What do I mean by this? Well in tgcf Xie lian had to endure a lot of torture and experience several traumatic situations and almost released face disease and killed a bunch of people with it. He was clearly very mentally unwell! And for Hua Cheng, he also went through a lot of trauma with his mom dying when he was young and the abuse he went through from his father and the kids who made fun of him to the point where he wanted to end his life, and then later he became a ghost with his parasocial attachment to a god. We see these characters at their worst, but when they get together, they are already 800+ years old and have lived a long life and matured and learned from their experiences.

[astroyongie]

Enhypen Reading March 2024

note: please take it lightly

Heeseung

Love: as far as I can tell, Heeseung is in a relationship at the moment but other have some troubles when it comes to communication (this bc I believe his current s/o is probably not Korean and they might struggle with language barrier which makes the relationship a little complicated) 

Career: he is having some complications with one of the managers, however when it comes to himself, Heeseung has been a little bit out of touch with his career, he isnt putting as much energy as he might have liked to put (that because he feels the dynamics are shifting)

Self: his mental health is struggling a little but that mostly because he was formatted into thinking in a certain way and with maturity and age he is understanding that the world isnt what he initially though it was. He is trying to involve with culture but its hard 

Jay

Love: I do believe that this man is also in a relationship that just started very recently but Jay doesnt seem like he is fully committed with this person. I dont know if there’s a special reason for this, but he is keeping things rather simple of now 

Career: his career is going well, his sponsorship have already wrapped up the contracts for solo stuff and he is more than excited to do them. Jay has also been training hard and putting effort into opportunities to show his fans a new side of his idol character 

Self: he has been money oriented lately, he is focused about himself, about how t improve himself in his wealth side, how to invest and also how t assure himself a positive future because he knows everything can come to an end quickly and he wants to put all the opportunities on his side 

Jake

Love: he is also in a relationship but things are quite weird for him, probably because his relationship feels “long distance” type of thing. He finds himself daydreaming about his partner a lot of times, and he probably have set goals that currently are too unrealistic for him and his partner 

Career: Jake have been some difficulties with his sponsorship that aren’t giving him what he might have wanted because he also cannot repay what they ask from him. Jake also feels like he hasn’t been as close to the other members has he had one been (however this feels like he has been the one taking distance unconsciously) 

Self: couldn’t get anything here 

Sunghoon

Love: boy is still dating the same person he was dating in January and things are going well for them since they are establishing a positive relationship and putting everything in table. I feel that he still puts his career first but he is trying to be a good partner 

Career: some complications here, one of his exclusive contracts wasn’t resigned by his sponsors (the brand probably dismissed him) so he wont be doing anything for them this year (or at least until the current contracts ends). Some difficulties in the relationship with one of the members 

Self: he feels really overwhelmed by everything, by his career, but th image he has to put with his fans with the rules he has to follow and the permeant fear that he can be cancelled for anything and anything. I feel like Sunghoon is walking o eggshells for a potencial reason 

Sunoo

Love: he is still dealing with his last relationship and with the arguments. It feels that even after January, February was a month were him and his ex kept talking (probably because they wanted to fix things) and although they have reached a concensus, the lovebirds are still in a complicated argumentative phase 

Career: I am pretty sure that his sponsor ditched him out and he is currently leaning on the company until they figure out what they can do without that kind of support things are a little more ocmlciated for Sunoo’s career. I also feel like the conflicts inside the company continues 

Self: he feels trapped in his situation. Theres probably a part of Sunoo who wishes to leave the idol life but at the same time he doesnt want to disappoint anyone 

Jungwon

Love: he is still single, nothing changed much since January, Jungwon is still dating with a side of himself that is way too broken to be able to stay in a healthy relationship at the moment. I am concerne about his mental health too 

Career: there’s some changes here, when it comes o his career. Jungwon have been activity putting his goals aside to allow some members to shine more than him yet he still tries to grasp a few whenever they come up 

Self: he is in a very emotional state, just like In January he is someone that longs for a relationship, he longs to find someone that will comfort and love him and that puts him in a fragile position 

Ni-ki

Love: Niki has been seeing people In a non official way however he is being way more selective than he was in January. He isnt allow to just be around anyone and his flings are hand picked 

Career: some complications here as well, I feel like Niki have made some mistakes when it comes to his image and these will keep repeating itself because he totally is obvious about consequences  

Self: he is someone with a straight head and perception and he doesnt allow things of everyday life to touch him in a negative way. Overall, Niki is doing fine, mentally and physically 

[11vein]

heyho! how did you learn how to draw and make art in general? i find your artstyle visually pleasing and nice to look at, i wish to one day be able to draw like you but i don't know where to begin 😞 also what are your art inspirations?

i know this is a cliche answer but i self-taught myself and improved quickly in my early years simply by attaching to a character i really liked and drawing them nonstop especially during my school days (and that character eventually morphed into my oc kaizer) because my ADHD ass didn't want to do anything with school loL genuinely though this is one of the best ways to learn is just to get really obsessed with something and draw it and branch out from there after you've had your fill dont be like me completely though when it comes to studying with art, you should absolutely do fundamental studies too (still life/etc) . i was stubborn and didnt really do it because i dont find a lot of joy in it but i think its kinda stunted my abilities that i never did in recent years though i went from drawing characters just standing/busts in an empty space to realizing i love drawing actual scenes with characters interacting with their environments and it has forced me to learn ways to streamline my art process and learn to do backgrounds. its been fun but now ive gotten way too ambitious and perfectionistic about one-uping myself and burnt myself out so im currently working on re-finding my passion and ways to work around that perfectionism. so thats kinda where i am rn...?

anyway, its really a matter of finding an obsession and honing in on it like i said . so do that but dont get so obsessed you ignore important stuff like i have done haHA

sidenote. don't fuck up your wrist listen to artists when they say you should not overexert it and do stretches because im fucked with carpal tunnel syndrome in both wrists already at age 23 whoops. also references. dont be afraid to use those theyre so important it took me so many years to not be stubborn about them and that also stunted me anyway when it comes to my art inspirations/??? a lot of it is just aesthetics of various media ive absorbed into my brain and jumbled around, but when it comes to actual individual artists here are some im heavily inspired by on the visual art side (warning for nsfw/suggestive works on some of these artists pages)

nuqelear (rip)

sidu

urano000

cata_dioptric

vellmori (inactive)

populamalus

bakui (is this their name?)

avrilundi/_96peori theres absolutely so many more but these are like. some of my primary ones i can recall lately

[weaselishmcdiesel]

theres a youtube channel profiting off and lying about ai art and it's pissing me off

@/tendofarms on youtube uses ai art in the thumbnails and videos of their animal crossing compilation videos, claims it to be made by them despite also giving credit to a @/lumasi.png on instagram, who claims it's "a comission." this art is also being sold on merch on the channel's etsy account.

They haven't posted a video in 2 months but to see that they've made money through this scheme really pisses me off. Also the fact that they're attempting to decieve people by creating a fake artist on instagram who posts the ai art. They've attempted to say the art is a blend of original art made in photoshop/illustrator as well as the help of ai art. I dont believe this is true and im going to show your asses why

On their first video, they say

"my normal workflow so far has been to paint backgrounds, then get Ai to help with character design, i bring to photoshop to select my favorites, and put together something from my personal painting combined with my favorite Ai characters. Hope this clears things up :D"

The art in question:

and if you have no issues with it, here are MY issues with it

i'll pretend for a second that this person did make the backgroundand ignore the fucking surreal characters. sure. ok so what the fuck are these details. and also how did the ai manage to match your style so well? it doesnt have a backglog of years of YOUR work, does it?

On another video, they say

"a lot of illustrator/photoshop work went into this art. I used Ai to get ideas for composition and generate some character ideas, still some stuff i wish i improved but i think i got it to a decent final stage. Hope you guys enjoy the art and the mix <3333 love!!!"

the art in question with my notes.

The reason this particular post stands out to me is because in the DESCRIPTION of this video, they say the art was made by @lumasi.png on instagram. So when i go to their account and find this art, i see this

so, ok. was it a commission or did tendyfarms make it using a lot of illustrator/photoshop work. and if they ARE two different people.. wow their styles are so similar thats crazy /sarcastic as fuck

I would also like to point out that @/lumasi.png's first post, one that isnt featured in a tendyfarms video, also reeks of ai.

But maybe this isnt a big issue. Their etsy after all only shows that theyve made 16 sales, and their most popular views sit around 100k views, which probably isnt enough to even earn a stable living from, so who cares.

Just. as someone who listens to a lot of music from youtube mixes/compilations, who also makes art, i feel it's really fucking disrespectful to try and claim art as your own in a space where i go to try and relax or find new musical artists. and it's fucking rampant! i have to check each mix to see if using ai for the art, which i can only really see if i click on the video, giving them a small boost in stats. And if they arent using ai art? theyre probably stealing the art directly from an artist and not giving proper credit. Forget about asking the artist for permission, it's not like countless youtubers have explained how thumbnails are The Most important element of a video. Just go ahead and take someone else's work to give yourself some cash.

I know tumblr users hate generative ai already, but i'd just like to give a little attention to what youtube looks like, and to try and ask for more vigilance, more comments calling out the bullshit. I dont see a lot of comments at all on tendofarm's posts! or any mention of ai can be brushed away with "oh i used ai as well as drawing it myself" :/ you didnt buddy. you just didnt do that.

Idk what the right thing to do is, report their etsy? report their youtube? does either company care? maybe you can tell me

but i should probably say dont harass them. as much as i would like to. just try your best not to give retention to videos that shamelessly and ile about ai. Really look at the videos, really scrutinize if you can spare the time to. thanks

also. is it just me or do the cats in lumasi's pfp and this etsy reviewer's photo look the same. not sure what this could mean. up to you

[suffarustuffaru]

The fanbase is scaring me, the redesigns brought up some weird people that are REALLY passionate about Liliana being half naked

Like theres a whole war going on on twitter rn and the poor character designer got harassed

My problem is with the amount of people upset with this, like i knew we had a bunch of pedos around because of the way tappei writes the girls, but damn i didnt think there were this many of them 💀

yes ive heard about that....... im answering your ask late oops haah but i hope the situations a Bit better..... the toxic parts of this fandom give me a headache but my usual motto is to stay off twitter, touch grass, ignore people, and then hold onto my own viewpoints unless proven wrong alsjdflsdj but like. yeah this fandom is a bit tough to stay in when it comes to certain circles (for example the amount of people low quality shitposting / ranting about the fandom or whatever on rezero ao3 atm in the past days/weeks is. mm. interesting). not my first time being in larger fandoms that make you sometimes feel like youre fighting in the trenches (you could name off a few big fandoms notorious for being toxic that date back to like 2016 and odds are ive been in a couple lajdlf) but yeah seeing people complain about liliana and capella's designs and then overly fixate on emilia's boobs when these three characters have more to bring to the table than just that and theres lots and lots of good things to say about the s3 trailer and their designs..... mm. yeah. im squinting hard at a few of the things ive heard on that. but anyway!!

like the new designs are an Improvement. In General. like ok, as a boob haver myself ("boob haver" is the funniest phrase to me alsdjfls but it is true nonetheless, i am one) i do not give a shit about emilias larger boobs like ok?? her boobs are bigger?? she is still my fav ever and sometimes it just happens when youre still a growing teen/young adult and emilias back to her more revealing main outfit when she wore a different outfit in s2 so the difference in chest size is really not that much. but liliana and capella? those are Improved designs. i think ive talked abt the treatment of underage characters / characters who appear underage on my blog before (and i definitely couldve worded myself better then but i stand behind the fact that some of the stuff otsuka and tappei do regarding this in rezero is just Unnecessary).

could designs like emilia's still be improved on in other ways? yeah 100%, just in the sense that there could probably be changed a bit to fit her slightly more timid and soft spoken personality. or you could take different directions on it in general if you wanted. ive seen some great redesigns of her main outfit!! though her main outfit in of itself is pretty nice to look at imo and its iconic and well-known for a reason. im of the personal opinion that i wish it was a little less revealing in the same vein that her s2 main outfit was (i like that outfit a lot!!) but its still a really solid design overall.

i had some faith after seeing the anime designers fix up typhoon's original design to be More Appropriate, and i love how the essence of liliana and capella's designs were kept the same. like its not just that theyre a little less revealing (and even then, theyre both still showing a lot of skin!!! which is good!!! i like the improvement while keeping the main stuff the same), but stuff like liliana's pants aren't transparent (probably to make it easier to animate?) and the yellow/orange gradient in capella's hair looks great!! they also both look more like grown women which is a bonus. unless youre Weird about this shit which is unfortunately a small percentage of the rezero community. like you cant win with those sort of people ig, bc capella's boobs are bigger too ljasdlfj youd think that win more people over.

also i appreciate capella's sports bra bc unlike elsa's outfit it Actually looks like it's supporting her chest. if youre someone with boobs and you dont have a flat chest, youre gonna need support when being active or itll Hurt. and elsa Does Not have proper chest support okay. ill forever wince remembering elsa's design in that sense HAH....

anyway but i digress. i got no clue what to do with toxic people in fandoms despite spending a lot of time lurking in large fandoms with loud toxic people haah.... its hard to do much about it especially with increasingly declining media literacy rates everywhere.... the notorious misogyny/homophobia/etc that can happen sometimes in anime communities.... that sort of thing. i kinda just avoid it when it comes to rezero in specific, or briefly talk about it on here, or rant about it to myself in my head or chat with pals about it in private if it really frustrates me that much!! and id say im a pretty patient person hah... im not frustrated often. and the fandom is not all weird people of course and i can attest to that as ive chatted with a lot of people here... ive also seen a lot of people leave due to the fandom's Issues which is. totally fair tbh.

and i think rezero is often a "baby's first fandom" so to speak... i dont mean that in a bad way of course but its more like its the first exposure to fandom and fandom etiquette and fic etiquette and that sort of thing when it comes to english circles. or at least its a pattern ive noticed, so my theory is that that occasionally that combines with toxic fans and then you get a few people complaining about the community and how bad our fics are on rezero ao3 ig lajdlfjsdlf. which is false by the way :<< and an annoying misuse of ao3 as a free creative archive :<<

but ultimately i hope the rezero character designer's alright (and honestly theyve done super super great work - like the anime Did Not need to give emilia a bajillion outfits and go above and beyond with improving liliana, capella, giving the suwens and their hometown a whole unique aesthetic, etc). and also while i have stuff to criticize with otsuka and tappei... and the toxic parts of the fandom hah... i still enjoy rezero apart from that and the uproar with the designs has not chipped away at me too much!! ive been in this fandom long enough i guess lmao i just roll with punches at this point T^T but i also just try to look on the bright side a lot in general so ;-;;;

these are the sorts of things i like to be aware about but i dont like to get myself super involved with it (since itll probably make it worse and/or make me stressed for no good reason lmfaoo) and i wont let it enjoy the parts of rezero that i do enjoy a lot (which is to say like. the other 98% of rezero hah). so. getting off twitter is the biggest godsend i promise lajdlsfj.

but anyway!! yeah i dont have much organized thoughts on all of this, this is just me rambling my feelings on it. hope this all makes sense anon <3

[filmmarvel]

PJO Series Overall Thoughts + Pros and Cons

Disclaimer! First of all, there are a lot more cons than pros here, and if you loved the show and don’t want to hear my criticism just keep scrolling. Second, I’m not someone to complain just because it isn’t exactly how it was in the book! I have quite a range of feelings about story changes. In regard to the ones I’ve listed as cons, i’m just irritated that they haven’t been able to match the book in frankly any capacity. I believe that if you’re making changes, it should be a) out of necessity, b) to improve upon the material, or c) taking positive creative license to try a new spin on an element from the source material. But the changes I’m complaining about, for the most part, haven’t met any of those requirements.

Pros:

Sets and Visuals

It was so magical seeing camp come to life!

The Underworld looks fantastic, the visuals are super cool, especially the Fields of Asphodel. That was a really cool spin on the books- the CGI was pretty good, and the concept there was really interesting.

Olympus was very cool looking too! It reminded me of Asgard.

Overall I Just Think There’s Lots of Potential!

Since the leads are fairly inexperienced (and kids), you can’t expect them to be incredible. They’re doing just fine, but I think they have a lot of potential, and I’m excited to see them grow over the course of the series!

Generally I still really like the casting and have high hopes for these actors, I just wish (for our sake and theirs) that they had better material to work with.

Plot Changes

This ones kind of a pro AND a con: Generally, I really like the flashbacks! They add a lot more depth to Sally, and her relationships with Percy and Poseidon. That being said, the episodes typically feel far too short to be adding material that wasn’t in the books. I thought it was fantastic in episode 7, but in other episodes it didn’t quite work when so much else was cut, or there were opportunities left untaken as a result.

I also liked that they included a few flashbacks with Luke in the finale- there was so much training and time at camp that didn’t fit into the first two episodes.

They got rid of the “names have power” stuff which is great (never made sense in the books).

They did a really nice job humanizing Medusa, but still creating conflict with her, and simultaneously setting up further issues with the gods.

I also agreed with their decision to move the fight from Santa Monica to Montauk, to save time.

Cons:

Dialogue and Writing

The dialogue is definitely less charming than in the books. It’s a huge part of what makes them fun, and the dialogue here is honestly pretty bland. The characters don’t totally feel like themselves, but it isn’t only the acting. Forcing the characters to be explaining stuff to each other nearly every time they have a conversation makes them a lot less personable.

Honestly, this series feels kind of elementary in comparison to the middle grade books. I’d imagine that, like the books, they were aiming to create something that could be enjoyed by young kids and adults alike. But I didn’t find it as successful as the book in this regard.

And the dialogue is consistently so surface level! Stiff, boring, and above all, CONSTANTLY telling over showing. This affects the likability of the characters, and the ability of the actors. Both parties are deterred by the info dumping, as they aren’t really given as many genuine lines or interactions as they should have.

Honestly, it kind of feels a bit like they gave some of Percy’s personality to Annabeth in parts of the show? I saw someone else point out that they’re kind of giving Annabeth the Hermione treatment (ie giving her some of the other characters good moments), which I kind of agree with. However, a lot of that was towards the beginning and middle of the season and has somewhat improved since.

I posted a whole rant earlier about the Lotus Casino episode, which I’ll just summarize: theres a consistent pattern in the show of having the characters figure out what’s going on immediately, removing the danger, and more importantly, not allowing the characters to make mistakes, which weakens both them and the plot. In addition, I didn’t like that they brought up May Castellan already, primarily because it was just another info dump, which (in my mind) gets lost amongst all the other info dumps and removes the poignancy from the reveal. Now, there’s absolutely time to fix the May Castellan situation and ensure that it still packs a punch later on, but for this season it wasn’t great. Go check out my last post if you’d like to hear the rest of my argument on that episode!

Some additional examples of the ‘not letting the characters experience danger’ thing: Procrustes (obviously), and Kronos- forget whether or not Percy should know who Kronos is, the biggest issue is that there’s very little evidence or buildup, so (again) there’s no tension or shock at the reveal. And finally, with Luke. I was so annoyed when Percy figured it out! I could’ve believe that they were doing it AGAIN. I still enjoyed that scene because Walker and Charlie were great, but that was disappointing for sure.

The thing with the pearls honestly amounted to nothing, and there was no reason for Annabeth to not be present in the underworld: that was just a tearjerker for the sake of being a tearjerker (manufactured drama).

Lowering the Stakes

I just wish they’d made it SLIGHTLY more mature- don’t get me wrong, it’s a kids show! I’m very well aware of that! But this feels a lot tamer than a lot of kids (PG) movies involving monsters and stuff.

Gabe was a real piece of shit in the books, but in the show they just kinda made him look lazy and turned him into comic relief. And I don’t believe in the argument that they had to make this change to benefit a younger audience- they didn’t really need to change anything there.

Throughout the majority of the season, I felt like they weren’t allowing the gods to be truly intimidating, or powerful. First with Ares, who wasn’t BAD but generally didn’t have that kind of dramatic presence that he had in the books. Again with Hades, who wasn’t shown as being REMOTELY intimidating, and perhaps the biggest offense of all- Zeus. Having the deadline pass with seemingly zero consequence or threat of consequence does absolutely nothing (and certainly doesn’t increase tension like I’m pretty sure Rick Riordan said was their reason for changing it). Up until the finale, viewers had very few reasons to fear the Gods. Even Dionysus and Hephaestus! In the books there’s a clear line- you can interact with them, but you DONT want to offend them. There’s a clear threat of power, and that just wasn’t remotely present for a while.

And again, I just want to clarify- this is an overall writing problem! It’s not that Ares, or any other one of the gods I just mentioned has a different personality than in the books, it’s that a show like this (KIDS OR NOT) should still be compelling, and part of that includes having real danger and clear stakes.

I would add that they did a much better job with this in the finale! Lance Reddick gave such an amazing performance, and truly made Zeus an intimidating figure. The fight on the beach with Ares was great as well. So I’m optimistic about this criticism moving into season 2, but I stand by the idea that this was an issue for the majority of the series.

Overall, it felt like they weren’t taking the serious parts seriously, AND they didn’t take the comedy as seriously either? So it isn’t as lighthearted OR as impactful as the books. It feels so much more bland and watered down by comparison.

Episodes Were Too Short

Everything just flowed really well in the books, here the pacing is off and the dialogue isn’t as natural (again, they’re forced to rely on a lot of telling instead of showing which takes away from genuine moments). Many character details and personality traits were cut for the sake of additional verbal explanation

As many others have pointed out, the fight scenes also feel pretty rushed, and haven’t quite conveyed the sense of urgency that they should. It all just lowers the stakes.

This Ones Kind of a Joke, but the Casting for Hephaestus

It’s mostly my book bias. This guy was NOT giving Hephaestus. Mainly because Hephaestus is the god of the forge, and I can’t picture this guy anywhere near one of those. He kind of looked like one of Santa’s elves, he’s giving tinkerer not GOD of the FORGE. This is also something they can absolutely fix/win me over in time lmao

Changes

I already mentioned most of the changes (good and bad) already, but there’s one more. I kind of wish they had kept Percy’s dream about Tartarus, especially given that they decided to have Percy figure out Kronos is behind it all earlier- it just would’ve clicked a little easier.

Finishing Thoughts

I don’t want to totally sound like a hater! I’m still enjoying the series, and I really hope it gets renewed for season 2! I was just disappointed in the weak writing. I hope that the writers will be able to recognize these flaws and improve for season 2.

Alright, I don’t really expect anyone to read this whole thing, but if you made it: thanks for reading! I’m curious to hear your thoughts, so I’d really appreciate comments, just keep it civil!

[uravityxo]

hello friends,, i just coming here to say smth !! im feeling a bit anxious rn about everything and i wanted to say some stuff and then add some of it to my pinned post too :3,, putting this below cut as its a bit negative !! so warning for that <3

first thing ; i am autistic and have adhd,, i find social cues a bit confusing and sometimes i just miss them,, i can also misread things or interpret them the wrong way !! i am also a very enthusiatic rp partner <33 i like to talk lots and i message people i think are happy with me and dont mind my rambles !! however ,, if ive ever got the vibes wrong and my messages are TOO MUCH - please, please, please let me know,, i never want to bother anyone or anything !!! i am just a super happy gal who likes to yap yap yap away. if i ever say anything that upsets you or anything, let me know! its never my intention to hurt anyone, i can just be a bit silly sometimes,, !! sometimes i just need brutal (or maybe polite) honesty !!

second thing ; i am overwhelmed right now by what to do on this blog, i know i've made lots of posts and i know this is for fun ,, but theres so much in my drafts i am struggling to even write as i see the number in my drafts and shut down :(( i am trying though ( i really am!) !! today is izukus birthday so im going to focus on writing that stuff today,, but yea,, i am really struggling to deal with stuff </3 so im sorry i am posting one reply every few days,, i wish i could do more !! but yes,, anyways !!

third thing ; i can be a bit forgetful!! when it comes to blog rules, interactions and dnis and stuff,, so if i ever mess up a rule or get something wrong i apologise SO much !! i wanna get things right and i do check rules often for blogs to remind myself but i may slip up and that stresses me sometimes :((

fourth thing (sorta) ; please let me know when i fuck up!! im just a lil dude trying to get by in life,, i just like having friends and stuff but sometimes i do wrong !! and whilst it isnt intentional its still smth which is important to apologise about and talk it through !! if i ever do you wrong ,, just know your feelings are valid and its okay to be mad and get angry at me !! just let me know what i did so i can improve on things in the future <33 :3

[dootmoon]

Some thoughts on Ex Astris

Okay so the TL;DR is: Go play it if you're someone who is mainly motivated by gameplay, it's one of the most enjoyable games i've played in like 10 years (im not kidding). the story is not bad, but it's very poorly told and leaves a lot to be desired. I should also warn that i'll probably spoil a couple of things, mainly on the gameplay side (because yes, I do believe some encounters are better if you dont know the gimmick).

Where do I even start, I only watched like 2 trailers before playting, i had 0 idea of what i was getting into, all i really knew about the game was that it was a full game release by the AK guys and that it was a turn based rpg. I legitimately bought it out of morbid curiosity, I was not expecting to find my favorite jrpg in a literal decade.

I'll go over what I liked the most and then explain the couple of issues I have with the game, it might sound like i loved it (which i did) but it's far from perfect and i think there's room for improvement. I think the combat is the real deal in this title, for those unfamiliar with it: it's a classic turn based jrpg but it has layers. The main 3 mechanics that make it stand out from other games is that each turn you have AP (action points) which limit what you can do each turn, however you can directly manipulate them with a combo system that gives you back AP. The second one is a parry system, during the enemy turn you can directly parry their attacks, you have 2 colors for parrying, both colors have different properties and there's certain attacks that can only be parried with the respective color. And lastly, theres a stagger bar, similar to FFXIII or posture bar in sekiro, although i think it's more akin to stagger in FFXIII. Once you break said bar you can enter hyper time for a few seconds where you have unlimited AP so you can combo them for massive damage. The combo system is very enjoyable, you will be blindly experimenting your combos for optimal damage each time you unlock new moves in the skill trees. Theres a very satisfying feeling to landing a big combo on an enemy that feels like it was entirely something you came up with. This sadly comes with a downside, once you figure out your big damage combos, there's not much of a reason to try anything different. It doesnt mean it stops being enjoyable but this is a wall most of games with combo systems have. Now the parry system, while it's fun, it sadly makes the game too easy. Sure theres enemies that will mix their timings to throw you off and a couple of unparriable attacks. But really, if you get good there's no reason to ever get hit. "But what about the unblockables?" yeah about that... Theres really just 3 enemies in the game that had them, and 2 of them were bosses, which you get a hard counter to the unblockable in the first boss that has it. I wish the game had more ways to work around you to make it more challenging. The only time the game REALLY tries to fuck you up is the final boss (this is a good thing) however it was still too easy. She really just makes the screen black and white and makes you parry based on the icon, then she makes you parry based on the color of the attack. This was sick and i wish there were more moments like this in the game. Now the dungeons were great, they feel like they belong in an older 3d zelda game. Sadly they dont get too crazy on the gimmicks, they were just box puzzles where you have to move them in the correct spots or point lasers to certain switches. Apparently this game has plans for DLCs so if theres something i wish upon to get explored more it would be this in particular. The rest of the game is the towns and the sidequests inside them, they're very usual stuff for a jrpg so you know what to expect, i cant elaborate much on it. Overall I think the game is meant to be replayed, by the end you're only able to fully build 3 characters out of 5 party members, sidequests expire and there's a bunch of stuff to mess around to make a playthrough different from the last one. The game changes a lot when you already know how it works or what really happens in the story.

Now the elephant in the room, the story: Yeah it's kinda just there, it's very poorly told. However it's HG and i can tell there was a lot of thought put into the wold building, it's very well made. It's just a shame that i could barely care about anything happening in it, even though I was kinda invested by the final hours i dont think that excuses the really bad storytelling. However starting my second playthrough is when I noticed it was indeed meant to be replayed. There's a bunch of stuff that feels so incredibly cryptic or really make no sense, once you go over it already having context it all makes sense and you just go like "oooh so that was they were talking about". I'm not excusing bad writing though, this is bad, but at least the story feels better on a second playthrough. Anyways, i'm kinda upset this was a mobile game, maybe if it wasnt, 10 people would've played it instead of just 5. I cant stress enough how this is a phone game that is way better than most of modern jrpgs in the market. it's like the devs went back and asked themselves what was the main appeal of the genre and what they thought made them fun to them and made an entire game around it. This is probably gonna be the biggest surprise of the entire year for me and i'm gonna have brainrot about this game for a while.

[winterzz7]

hi winter whats up how are u :))

this is a free yap pass. just in case u needed an invitation to yap about something

if theres anything on ur mind or any ideas or plans or…really anything!! hope ur doing okay :,)

- ash

i am very sick </3 eughghhutghjbdfghjbdfg im a victim of my family's monthly round of passing off the sickness to each other.

omg i get to yap omg jdfgjkndf

okay so like im just gonna yap about random shit because ive been given an opportunity :3

so first of all my last club volleyball tournament of the season is this weekend and im like half excited half done with this shit, we have sucked all season and a lot of people have had very little improvement. i set so i get to deal with their shitty passes and them rocketing my sets out of the court </3 honestly i wish i had tried out as a different position because at the club i play for there is SO MUCH competition for setters. like im not TERRIBLE im just not as good as some of the other setters. like i pass and hit better than a lot of my teammates which is concerning as i do neither of those things often (I DID GET A KILL LAST TOURNAMENT THO CUZ SOMEONE ELSE GOT SECOND HIT AND SET ME UP) but just like udufhdfhuidfbhj idk i love my teammates but good god sometimes. ALSO the city we play in has a broadway theater and the last time we stayed there you could see it from our airbnb it was so cool!!! but the last time we did play there i got rlly sick and didnt play for one of the days cuz i was vomiting <3.

anyways onto something else cuz no one wants to hear about my volleyball stuff

oh ive been reading alexander hamilton (ron chernow) and i love it uurugghgh I EVEN TALKED TO MY EYE DOCTOR ABOUT IT WHEN I WENT LAST WEEK SJKAGKB but im a sort of slow reader and im like halfway done after maybe 2 months... but honestly im more just trying to enjoy reading it rather than reading it fast just to say i did yk?? but its silly and i love like seeing where lmm got his ideas and like thinking about what song the part im reading might have been based on!! grammarly is yelling at me rn help anyways i just aagghkhk

CROCHET. im like convulsing i need to unleash the inner grandma and get mountains of yarn NOW. it makes me feel cool and like before i got to learn i had always wanted to learn and even tried finger crochet before. but like im double jointed and my fingers pop out of place sometimes... so holding the yarn gets a little awkward

yapping done :3

[ryemackerel]

HALLO i was wondering how you get out of art block?? your art is very expressive and i absolutely adore all your colour choices and designs. ive been having trouble with art block for a very long time now so i’m just trying to ask other artists how they get outta it <3 i hope u have a niceday yesyes

OUGHH HELLO!!! holy crap, art block is the WORST. everytime i encounter it, its always hard to beat it D: theres days where i feel like i WANT to draw something so badly but my brain just. cant function

i dont have a definitive solution for art block, but whenever i do, i have a few ways to cope with it. sometimes they work, sometimes they dont? but whenever the time comes and im just sitting at a brick wall, i got some survival tips

1. come up with random silly ideas,, it could be anything: random words, phrases, scenarios. they can be as nonsensical as you want them to be. during art blocks, my mind is completely dry with ideas, so i always try to compile a list of ideas from the past so i can come back to them later on. i try to come up with random duos or something as simple as “mcdonalds date”. i might not work on these now, but maybe some random lil word can spark that creativity in me

heres my art ideas list… i have some ideas that are like 8 months old in there BGAHSGA, but i save em there till i feel like working on them

2. STRUGGLE DOODLES!! i like to make a bunch of doodles of random scenes that i think about in my head. doodle practically anything. your favorite person, favorite animal, something you see outside your window, frogs?

heres a few of mine. most of the time, i NEVER get to finishing them. however, during art blocks sometimes i like to go back to really old, incomplete guidelines and add some new, random addition to it. sometimes i forget what my sketches were exactly meant to be? and i guess thats the fun about interpreting stuff and giving things a new spin to them. during art blocks, i HATE trying to come up with new drawings from a blank canvas (since i dont even have any ideas to begin with). but working on old wips, or completely revising them? sometimes these can be super fun :]

[and bonus tip!! and this is like, a golden tip that everyone loves: going back to super old drawings and redrawing them!! its my favorite. i absolutely love seeing the improvement ive made over the years. its also pretty easy to work with since you dont have to stress about coming up with completely new ideas from a blank slate! GAHH i should do that more often.]

3. search up your favorite fanart, go on pinterest, anything. i love this one.

search up some really cool photos of outfits, aesthetic backgrounds?? i find myself searching up a lot of fanart of fandoms im in, any word with “aesthetic” at the end, casino aesthetic, anything! pinterest has always been my go-to platform to find ideas. i go on the app and not even a second in, im blown with all of this cool art n character designs. i have a problem saving almost everything i find into my boards, but at least i saved a chock-full of ideas i can work with. :)

a thing about me: ive never been the type to try and force my art block out. whenever im facing a block, its extremely difficult for me to come up with things on my own. sometimes i let it wait for a while, but that tends to take a REALLY long time. D: if i dont feel like drawing, or doodling, or really doing anything? i always like scrolling through really pretty photos. that tends to spark a small idea in me i can work with, and sometimes i manage to get out of art block from there. it starts out small, then over time it gets even better.

these photos especially gave me WAY more motivation than i ever had to draw wilbur during an art block moment. i started off making small random doodles of him in a neon city and over time it kinda turned into a fixation for neon cities. i LOVE imagining characters in random photos i find on pinterest.

wishing you the bestest in your art journey!! this crap’s tough but i know you can break it yo. thank you so much for the ask!

feel free to reblog and add your own ideas below :] i was only able to come up with a few, but if youd like to add on, go right ahead! /noforce

[kaleidosouls]

im too lazy to put the vpn on to tweet so im gonna tumblr post; talk watch abt the amazing digital circus ep 3 (spoilers ofc) [Edit: i had more thoughts i guess il put it in the replies bc tumblr has those now? maybe itll be more accessible for my twitter generated yapping disorder)

finally some appreciation for my man and favourite character kingler like he goddamn DESERVES. i actually have not enjoyed tadc very much theres so much i rly dislike abt it but its like super well produced and indie so like you watch to be on the loop (i wish it was actually rendered closer to the quality of cd games from the 2000s that it seemed to be referencing but like, it looks how it looks and thats how it is), i rly disliked the script for the mpst part in the first 2 eps but ive loved kingler from day 1 so having an ep with mostly just him and pomni (i have mixed feelings on her too but w/e) was great great great and we had some lore n stuff but rly like i could smell a fellow traumatized man whos a bit wacky to cope from miles away and im glad to be proven Right

sorry im older man fucker so he rly hits all the boxes bc hes actually so sweet and helpful hes just mentally unstable (love him for that) and a lot of his endearing like caring nature comes thru in the physical aspect of the character and with less dialogue, rly the less dialogue the show has the better, idk who does the scripts and i dont wanna diss them but like oof i fucking hate it shkdh like its not like its never funny but its just, off, ive still not been able to properly explain to my wife the way that its off to me, and it bothers me to not be able to cohere those emotions! anyway

kingler so cute so very handsome and uwu so gentle and kind 💖💖💖 i love how gentle he is and good to pomni (ofc ppl are gonna call it fatherly or god forbid grandfatherly when hes like 40, and now if you ship them ppl will say its incesty when theyre two grown adults but w/e) like idk i just love a kind mentally unwell man!!! im simple!!! him just overexposing at the near end in dialogue was rly awkward in the writing like man they just, the dialogue is so not good. but in theory his character is so good and the thing abt the darkness and such was sweet. like hes just always been so endearing and the ep just gives a lot of free real estate kingler screentime to drink with my eyeballs, it doesnt change my opinion on the character at all bc ive always loved him this much

the rest was ok just the typical fare for the most part, like tadc rly often makes me so dissatisfied bc it has so So much potential but the ways it kinda just ends up like a dumbed down typical cartoon is really meh. i do love caine though and more proof that hes a non malicious (although maybe harmfully ignorant) ai. his gags almost land for me if they werent really Really lampshaded, i love how much he cares but is incapable (yet) of improving, i thought it was sweet zooble was so earnest with him. like, the whole tadc def improves the less mean spirited it is, for me. which is hard bc the most favoured character is rancid mean disney purple guy.

gghh why is this show so agdidhsifirh (gestures of anger) like its like, much worse ENA or smth but i know theres more that bothers me abt it than that, and i cant grasp it. im stil in hell irl so i cant cohere a lot in general so w/e, i need to chill and let go. i did like the horror trophy head designs of everyone that i could see (i wanted to get a better look at kinglers but i couldnt find a good frame from watching on my phone) like they were super over the top and fun. i wish the settings they travelled to still felt like, even remotely circusy? they truly feel like just we’re in a different cartoon. but its ok i only hate 749374947493 things abt the shows style choices

i want a framed photo of kingler so i could kiss it. or maybe i could trt to makena plush of him. he is my beloved to hurt/comfort. hes wacky and nice and traumatized and has memory issues and i wuv him

[narcissisticpdcultureis]

hi im anon from (734828727660412928/npd-culture-is-deciding-to-give-up-on-friendships?source=share) (hopefully that link works, I don't use tumblr often so I'm not sure how to go about following up asks on anon). just came back to read this blog during a really bad crash im having right now because it cheers me up to know im not alone in having symptoms of this disorder and saw my ask got posted...

(update on friend situation) just today they said in the group chat theyre all drawing gift art for each other and other friends... i'm still waiting on the paid art from them but they're doing art trades and stuff for free so i feel kind of like trash. im a bit of a bleeding heart though so im gonna give them like one more month before telling them not to bother finishing the art for me... id love my money back because it did cost a LOT of money but i dont want to be a dick so im just going to express my disappointment by telling them not to worry about the commission at all. i want to feel like i have some right to be mad in this situation but im very soft hearted and dont really have any other friends so if i lost these friends id have literally nobody else in my life :( and that kinda feels like hell for me to think about... i feel like im being treated like dirt but im still going to go christmas shopping for them.............. even if i feel like shit, i feel shittier if i dont get people gifts and stuff because i just think to myself, like, "i feel like crap if nobody buys me shit for holidays or my fucking own birthday and i dont want other people to feel that way".....

also im feeling a little sad because whenever my friends talk about their friends they dont even refer to me by name theyll go "[friend a name], [friend b name] and oomfie are in our server" or something. im not even a name to them... i feel like the last kid picked on a team but not even the last pick. like have you guys ever been on a sports team and you kinda got awkwardly waved over to one of the teams because nobody even wanted to pick you? yeah.

i wonder if im just really dense and need to pick up on hints that people dont even want to be around me. i even tried to post this video game i started working on lately because i thought it was really interesting and cool and i put my soul into it but everyone just ignored it in the group chat.

i think the social outcast route is probably my best bet at this rate, i think. im going to be pretty fucking depressed about limiting my social interactions but i think the depression from isolation isnt as bad as getting constant narc crashes from people not putting even a tiny bit of energy into friendships. like.. i honestly am not asking for very much. i get fucking narc highs if someone uses my fucking name in a conversation. i get highs from literally the bare minimum fucking interaction of anything directed in my direction im so desperate....

i wasnt going to write up a follow up ask but i just wanted to say thanks to this blog for existing and making me feel like im not completely alone and thanks for the nice comments in the reblogs and tags, it cheered me up. you guys are really nice to me and i'm a complete stranger to you all, it makes me feel like theres some hope for nice people existing out there. im just a little too tired to carry on. thank you all, i hope you have a really good day. keep on surviving out there, it's not a kind world to any of us, and it's tough to stay alive at all.

(apologies for another vent but thanks for posting my asks <3 i wish you all the best and nice days to come. also sorry this isnt in the npd culture format, but i just rly wanted to say thank you for the support on the other ask)

sending hugs (with consent) nonny 🫂 i'm so sorry honestly you deserve way better than how your friends are treating you :( i hope at some point you can talk to them about how they're making you feel and improve the situation because it sounds like you deserve better

[mekatrio]

also when i read all the upgrades that the ✨Definitive✨ version of vesperia had it just makes me SOOOOO excited for thesurely confirmed maybe or not upcoming abyss remaster like YESSSSS cuz jfc the only possible way to play abyss rn is either the ps2 version w egregious load times or the 3ds version where the framerate drops EVERY TIME you cross a bridge on a map... so goddd am i excited for a version that is actually. STABLE. and maybe this is too wishful to hope for but i do... hope gameplay improves... but also idk how that could be done cuz honestly ive been thinking abt it yknow and like.... abyss is kinda rough and unpolished af in the gameplay sense like it feels. almost very obviously unfinished... and i wouldnt be surprised if it really was unfinished cuz from what little i did read abt the development cycle, there was quite a lot that was left out in the original japanese release that was later patched in the english (US?) release, like a bunch of missing artes and stuff.. and even beyond that like. theres still a lot thats feels unfinished, with how like.. cuz yknow in a typical jrpg, every time u visit or revisit a new or old town, theres something new to do there. but with tota sometimes u go back to a town... just for the sake of being there. like ok u talk to someone.. and thats it?! theres so much town-hopping like huhh. but what makes it even weirder is how several locations have pathways that should logically lead to some new area.. but it just never becomes accessible ever. like that path to the residencies in yulia city. or the path to the factory in belkend. or that door in the chapel of grand chokmah. and im sure theres several more ive forgotten to list but yeah in this sense abyss does feel unfinished... not to mention how incredibly awkward some of these map designs are like brah fucking... DAATH.... Also that weird moment when we went down to the core where the game really hyped it up as like This Is Going To Be A Timed Event Get Fucking Ready and then it wasnt a timed event like huh wtf. which is especially weird bc the game Has had timed event like during the fucking uh airplane in the canyon moment. but ok.. but yeah really idk how they could ever fix all of this cuz honestly the map design jank is kinda really deeply embedded into the game and it might honestly just be a waste of resources to even try to amend it atp but yeah.. its just something ive been thinking abt. kinda sucks that the gameplay aspect of abyss is this lacking cuz GODDDD the writing... is sooo so good. so incredibly good that it might actually be my favorite jrpg in terms of writing like sorry final fantasies but this is... woawefjdsk... i love u tales of the abyss