#The pain and suffering and charm of human life

[fragmentedblade]

The more I learn about them the more I think the heliobi are in the right

[radabeast]

Why Aren't The Hornsent NPCs Named? An Essay On The Challenge for Compassion

So easy answer. Neither our pal in the Miquella Brigade nor the Grandam actually tell their names to us. Case closed!

No no no but more like, why didn't the DEVELOPERS choose to let us know them by name? A whole chunk of The Point is that the hornsent are people too, right? So why would we not even get to know our two (mostly just one, even, as you're not likely to even find grandam) hornsent ambassadors' actual names?

Fromsoft did something similar to this in Armored Core 6 just recently. That game is PLAINLY all about the horrors of capitalism, colonization and war, albeit almost all of your time is spent not with the resistance, but with the companies trying to tear the planet apart for fuel. Your protag's motivations aside, the RLF, Rubicon Liberation Front, are hardly given any narrative ambassadors to you at all; your Rubiconian partner pleads with your on some occasions, but otherwise the emphasis is elsewhere. Their liaison with their organization isn't even named. You don't even get to MEET most of their ranks until the secret third route, and even then, half the time that's just when you're fighting against said individuals as opponents. So...

Fromsoft is unique in that they often don't spoon-feed you "this is right" and "this is wrong". By no means do they ever seem to say colonization and slaughter is correct, and in fact the very crux of the plot is in grappling with the justifications. BUT, you are placed directly in the role of the oppressors' side. All around you are people you will grow to respect, and fight alongside, and they will also help you tear down this planet if you choose that route. You do, very much so, have to FIGHT and CHOOSE to aid the people of Rubicon, even if it hurts. Even if it means fighting, abandoning and even killing the people who have been by your side. And I think that's much more realistic to many real-life experiences than just "starting out on the right side".

Back to Elden RIng and the hornsent, though. Grandam is found only under very specific circumstances, within a single location, and within a small time window of the game. You step out of that window? You lose her completely, including the lore she had, and the means with which to understand better the hornsent. Why? Why would Fromsoft even implement her, if it's that hard to even reach her words?

And again, I think it's... realistic. You, the Tarnished, are a human along Marika's progeny, barring your own personal character lore. You are a human and you are part of the race that had slaughtered the hornsent. Of COURSE the hornsent themselves aren't going to trust you, spoonfeed you WHY you should care about them. Shouldn't you care already about the pain and suffering of others? Why WOULDN'T you? If it's that hard to come to grips with the horrors Your Kind caused, then maybe you're no better.

And I think. The story wants to challenge you like that, past gameplay, past feeding you their intent directly. You have to SEEK OUT the answers and THINK. Is it truly justified to slaughter a whole race? Was this truly right? Should I think of these individuals as people, or as monsters?

Hornsent (NPC) is also a very interesting choice. Not only is he the only hornsent you're actually likely to find and speak with, but he actively hates your guts. Soon as the charm is off, even, he's back on his path of vengeance. He says time and time again, he's nothing more than this mission to Get Back on those responsible. Wouldn't the devs want to make you weep for someone far more pitiable, far more palatable?

Well, if you bother paying attention to him enough, and aid the man in his questline, you'll understand then that he's someone who lost his whole family to Messmer's crusades. Mother, wife, child, in addition of course to the innumerable others slaughtered. Is that not enough to want all-consuming vengeance? Wouldn't YOU want people dead because of that? Regardless, even, of whether or not he was even a perpetrator of the original jar slaughters (and I've seen enough feasible evidence against that)... Is he not pitiable enough for that alone?

To you, he is just a Hornsent. To he himself, the man is a Hornsent, likely a title he wears both in defiance, as well as the only scrap of identity he has left. His people were killed because they were Hornsent. His family was killed because they were Hornsent. Would you even ever see him as anything else? Would it matter, even, if he HIMSELF has nothing else?

And, clearly, if you've been seeing anything anywhere in the fan discussions: this challenge to Think is lost on many people. Some people, somewhat understandably, take these aspects as Fromsoft caring little about the hornsent at all, and claiming them as The Original Evils within their own story. Others don't even bother to take anything not fed to them, and claim that the slaughter of hornsent was duly justified, and that this is undeniably supported within the game. But even barring the consistent themes of dichotomies, dualities, and the cycles of abuse ever-present throughout the game-- yeah, I'd say a good deal of reflection could and should be found in the self, first. Who are YOU when challenged for this compassion, first?

[misscammiedawn]

Hypnosis and Dissociative Disorders

I've been meaning to write this since Charmed.

I shall not point fingers or name names but during Charmed 2024 there was a 101 class that taught that it was unsafe to play with those who dissociate as part of a mental illness. The graphic, which I'll paste below, used the word "Can't".

I wanted to speak to that.

Hypnosis has several different definitions. One could go to a hypnosis event and ask every presenter "define hypnosis in a single sentence" and get a different answer every class, likely a few may even contradict.

One such definition I could use is "Hypnosis is an altered state where a hypnotee is lead to a suggestible state where the hypnotee is dissociated from their conscious thinking." though one could say it is "an altered state that leads to breakdown in critical thinking and a heightened state of suggestibility" or you could start talking about the unconscious or subconscious mind.

Fact is, there's a lot of theory work at play and the language we use to shape the concepts isn't as important as understanding the concepts.

Dissociation is a natural part of hypnosis. It's also a natural part of existing. In much pre-talk patter we as hypnotists tend to ask an introduction level hypnotee to think about their experiences with time dilation, with highway hypnosis, with spacing out, with walking into a room and forgetting why you came in there.

Things so normal that as part of rapport, a hypnotist tends to assume the hypnotee can latch on to one of the concepts.

Dissociation is a spectrum. Literally. Within psychology the DES-II tool grades dissociation experiences on a scale, hence the acronym.

Graphic source

When people, including myself at times, describe dissociative disorders they tend to be referring to disorders that focus on dissociation as their main symptom. Depersonalization, Derealization and of course Dissociative Identity Disorder. Over the course of my life I have been diagnosed with all three.

But the scale includes Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, both complex and standard. Complex simply refers to a level of trauma that has been ongoing long enough that it is not a single memory or incident that triggers the symptoms.

According to the American Psychiatric Association one in eleven people will be diagnosed with PTSD at some point in their life with 3.5m diagnosed per year in the USA.

Which is to say that dissociating as part of an illness includes 8% of the population. Does that mean 8% of all potential hypnotees are too dangerous to play with?

...the answer is not a clear cut, "no". There is some elevated danger. But rather than teaching people not to play with those who live with these experiences, perhaps we can teach why there should be heightened caution and then allow people to navigate together.

We should always strive to educate and provide tools. When you tell a person they can't do something then they'll just do it without understanding why they aren't supposed to or, worse, predators will find those who were excluded from safer spaces. Harm is not reduced, an educator just gets to walk away from the harm with a simple "I said they shouldn't".

And plus, I said 8% of the general population...

Within hypnosis circles I assure you it is far higher when one factors in that multiple studies have supplied evidence that hypnotic susceptibility increases along with dissociative capacity.

Suffice to say, from utilizing hypnotic susceptibility tests (HGSHS) and dissociative tests (SDD and DES) the more a person dissociates, the more susceptible to hypnosis they are.

The human mind uses dissociation as a way of coping with physical and emotional pain, among other necessary inner needs, and so a person suffering from a mental illness that features dissociation becomes a naturally gifted hypnotee. It's a matter of practicing a skill constantly without realizing that they are refining something useful. Wax-On/Wax-Off.

This leads to a number of safety concerns. We've typed on serious concerns such as altering sense of identity and derealization attacks from lack of grounding. This is a topic near and dear to our heart as we acknowledge that we needed to gain an education in how to safely consent to hypnosis play and failing to do so in the past caused harm to ourselves and to those we played with.

So here's a list of potential dangers in playing with those who are further along the dissociative spectrum, how to mitigate those dangers and create a space where everyone can play safely.

I'll focus on hypnotees with dissociative experiences for the most part as the relationship between dissociation and hypnosis is primarily a concern while the hypnotee is in trance. That having been said I acknowledge that Dom Space connects just as much to the spectrum and an entire new post can be made on the topic of performing hypnosis when you have a dissociative disorder.

Heaven knows it is a topic I study feverishly to maintain safety for myself and those who entrust their mind to my care.

So... with that said, let's talk about the dangers.

Abreactions

This is likely the most common concept that comes up when thinking of the relationship between PTSD and hypnosis. An abreaction is the moment a hypnosis session or scene goes off the rails because the hypnotee is actively reacting to a trauma trigger while they are in a suggestible state. Their Fight/Flight/Freeze/Fawn impulse may be triggered and cause a physical or emotional reaction which was not part of the negotiated/planned scene.

This could be a cut and dry example of "and think about all the times you've been hypnotized right there on that sofa" causing a hypnotee to follow the suggestion and regress in memory to a time before a bad break-up when their former partner hypnotized them on the sofa they are currently on.

It could be an abstract example like "imagining yourself in a field of flowers and breathing in, noting how lovely the scent is, like the most beautiful perfume." causing sense memory to trigger the scent of a perfume that was in the air during a traumatic moment of their life that instantly flips the switch in their mind to go into F/F/F/F mode.

Likely any given hypnotist will experience this at some point in their life. The first example is one that any person could experience. Hypnosis naturally draws upon associations and when you create an association in the present to a negative emotion in the past you will summon it into the present.

With the second example, that association is already there and it was activated during the scene. The source of the abreaction. I avoid using the word "Trigger" both because of shitty internet discourse in the 2010s and because the term is used for other things in hypnosis, but that is what it is. A sense, a memory, an association which causes the source of trauma to intrude upon the present. The danger that the hypnotee experiences in these moments is very real.

Typically when I discuss these topics I put a disclaimer and emphasize how present the traumatic experience is. My hope is that anyone who is interested in hypnosis knows full well how true and powerful inner experiences are. If you doubt that then I sincerely do not know why you are in this community to begin with.

How to prevent an abreaction is important but should never be learned at the expense of learning how to handle an abreaction. Prevention is about disclosing during negotiation, asking the hypnotee to volunteer anything which may activate a negative reaction or simply what topics to avoid. Phobias are common enough examples of things that a hypnotist should know before working.

But disclosing every part of a trance or scene during the early phases of a hypnotic relationship is essential too. This way the hypnotee does not get surprised by anything propping up during play and they can measure their expected reactions before going into a suggestible state.

But if, despite caution, something does happen? What then?

Noting that every abreaction manifests specific to the person, their situation, their emotional state and how the scene caused it to happen. The first thing the hypnotist needs to do is not overreact. Over-correcting is an easy mistake to make in the moment but it will lead to an overall negative outcome.

Assess the situation and try to recognize what is happening. I had mentioned that the reflex is "Fight/Flight/Freeze/Fawn" this can be obvious like thrashing or ejecting out of trance instantly. It could be something harder to notice like locking up and becoming unresponsive or emotionally regressing to a terrified state.

If the hypnotee is still in trance then do your best to offer comfort and grounding. Remind them what is happening, remind them that they are safe, perform some grounding exercises such as box breathing (breathe in, hold, exhale for a number of seconds).

Touch is a case by case situation here. I know if I were having an emotional flashback to an assault then being touched would launch me further into abreaction territory. If you believe holding a hand would be beneficial then at the very least communicate it "I'm here, I'm going to take your hand, everything's safe, I'm here."

Over distance you should communicate this via modality. "I'm here, just listen to my voice, focus on the sounds in the room, I'm not going anywhere" for an audio example, "Just feel the blanket beneath you, you can brush your fingers against it if you need" for touch based.

The idea is to use emotional comfort, sensory grounding and patience to bring the hypnotee gently out of the moment.

Then apply aftercare and discuss what happened, what could be improved, what the hypnotee needs and acknowledge that the stress of these moments impacts the hypnotist too. Leave room for the hypnotist to recover as much as the hypnotee.

Decide together if this will end the session or not. Do not cut off on principal. If someone is conditioned to believe that displaying their negative reactions will lead to play stopping then they will hide those reactions. Accept that they happen. Learn how to grow together and incorporate care, comfort and safety into every scene.

Spontaneous Hypnotic Amnesia

One danger for those who suffer dissociative disorders is that their brains are very good at editing information. The further down the spectrum one is, the more adept their mind is at naturally pushing away things that they do not wish to think about nor have the capacity to integrate.

One categorization of dissociation is a failure for the brain to integrate information and experience. It is the cause of time dilation, it is why critical thinking is bypassed and it is why those further on the dissociative spectrum are able to compartmentalize their experiences so effortlessly that they can maintain dissociated personalities.

Where most people who practice hypnosis typically have to study how to achieve post-hypnotic amnesia, those who begin working with hypnosis with patholigized dissociative experiences may need to learn how not to experience it. I include this as I have spoken to multiple people who have lived this reality and it is something we ourselves experienced in the past.

Should a newer hypnotee show signs that they are not remembering what is happening during trance, it is a good practice to train them on how to retain information. Hypnotee Agency is a skill that one develops and allowing them the knowledge that they can chose to retain the information during a trance is as important as reinforcing how easy and normal it is to forget when that is a negotiated part of the scene.

All it takes to be safe here is to just remind them that if they wish to and find it enjoyable to do so, they may retain the information from this trance.

Nothing more complicated than that.

Derealization/Unreality

Derealization is a common experience within dissociation that is actually lower on the dissociative spectrum than PTSD. It is when you do not feel attached to your present experiences in real time.

A common version of this is "Deja Vu" which is a sensation where you are having difficulty integrating your present experience because it "feels" like you've already experienced it.

It can manifest in many other ways, however the commonality is that the person experiencing this knows that it's abnormal. When a person is disconnected from their surroundings like this they may experience a barrier between themselves and the world, they may have a distorted sense of time and they may become physically unresponsive and withdrawn.

Source: Mayo Clinic

The best way to handle this is to make sure that grounding always includes a thorough count-up that lets a person feel both in their body (this will help with depersonalization too) and aware of their surroundings. Ensuring both debriefing and aftercare focus on keeping reality in the room is important when someone's sense of what is real can drift.

For that reason it's a good idea to try and reinforce those ideas of what is real and save them in a little box that can be stored away if there are ever any reality altering suggestions in play, that way retrieving and unpacking that box can just be a natural part of the post-scene.

I linked it earlier, but my post on the topic can be found here.

Depersonalization/Altered States of Identity

Ah, our favorite soapbox.

Much like derealization, depersonalization is a symptom that is lower on the scale than PTSD and is actively invoked during inductions such as the Bandler which turns a handshake into the hypnotee starring at their hand and having the sensation of the hand distanced from their mind. Literally dissociating the hand from your body and using that sensation to build a trance.

It's a good induction. All forms of dissociation are not bad things. That is something I want to make sure an audience fully understands. This post is here to destigmatize, particularly when a 101 class was teaching stigma.

Depersonalization is a disconnection from one's sense of self. These are the moments when one feels like they are not the ones living through a moment, they are experiencing themselves from an outside perspective.

Once again, things that are utilized heavily in induction patter.

Source: Mayo Clinic

The derealization advice works well in this case, particularly the idea of creating a "back-up" to restore carefully at the end of a scene.

The big difference though is that depersonalization as a natural thing that those with dissociative disorders do can lead to some bleed when doing suggestions which alter a person's sense of self. I highly recommend an optional suggestion or affirmation that can help a hypnotee ground themselves. That may be too close to therapy for many though.

The hard part about being safe with depersonalization symptoms is that they are typically things that we actively engage with during hypnosis. I guarantee at least one person read "Feeling like a robot or that you're not in control of what you say or how you move." and thought of that as an absolute win.

This is where a bit of negotiation and hypnotee agency comes into play. Reality needs to be kept in the room during all hypnosis. Diving into ego-death or erasing reality may be tempting, especially for those who aren't particularly fond of reality or themselves, but it is too dangerous to surrender those things.

My definitive post on the topic has more information.

Though while I'm talking about altered personalities, I want to make something clear which I did not type about much in my Personality Play post...

Plurality

This is a topic on its own which could take on an entire post to itself. I may yet write it. If anyone has read our Madison and Belladonna stories they would know that they are written entirely based upon the life lessons Daja and I have been learning while I began therapy and was diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder. Many of my lessons for how to safely play with plural systems are mixed in with the fiction.

When I say Plural I mean to refer to those who have multiple dissociated personalities, along with circumstances such as dissociative barriers.

There are as many displays of plurality as there are people who experience it. Every system is different. No two people are not on fire (awww).

So with that said, any play on either side of the watch is going to be lead with self-advocating. A hypnotic relationship involving a system (or more than one, even) will need a level of disclosure. Not just that a system exists but how that system manifests. What patterns are known regarding switches, what best works when an unexpected switch occurs, what levels of dissociative barriers exist between alters/parts, what terminology is preferred...

Wait, that's a lot to throw at once.

Our version of plurality is based upon Dissociative Identity Disorder. Which is to say that my system, originating via complex PTSD during childhood, used to have firm dissociative barriers between one another. This meant that, prior to diagnosis, you could have an emotionally charged conversation with me, Dawn, and then the next day Cammie will wake up and depending on the level of dissociation (typically but not always linked to stress or proximity to trauma triggers) will either not remember what happened during that conversation or will not carry the emotions that I had experienced. "Not remembering" can simply be "won't think about"

As I said, it's quite subjective. But the conceit is that with those on the DID spectrum will have a complete disconnect between parts/alters.

For those with less dissociation, but still experience plurality, they may not have amnesia or barriers between parts, allowing themselves to communicate with one another actively.

Within psychological communities there is eternal debate on all of these experiences and one of the more poignant debates is that the difference between DID and OSDD seems to just be a level of severity and that treatment and therapy tactics tend to move DID patients into the OSDD box and so they shouldn't be labeled as separate disorders.

These rules on amnesia, inner communication and emotional consistency between parts typically apply outside of disorders. I do not wish to engage in syscourse. But as above when I mentioned abreactions, those who practice with hypnosis know how capable a mind is to create hypnotically induced personalities. There are experiences outside of the DSM-V and that really shouldn't be a controversial statement.

A switch is when one part/alter trades out for another. The reasons are hyper specific to every system and cannot really be predicted without knowing their circumstances intimately. For instance the scent of lavender will draw me out without fail.

These can happen without warning and during hypnosis. Being cautious about body language, tone of voice and sudden changes in mood are the best you can do without guidance from the one with lived experience.

I'd also cautiously warn to end a scene and check in if there is an unexpected switch and there's no negotiated playbook on what to do in case of a switch.

The first Madison and Belladonna story tells the story of that very circumstance because that happened in my real life.

For safety it is best to try and communicate with the entire system over how to approach any aspect of hypnosis play. Exploring is a collaborative action and it can be a rewarding experience to find what works and what doesn't work. But it does take time.

For some basic "until I know better" rules, I'd say NEVER FORCE A SWITCH is a fairly basic rule, though. Also do not assume consent for a specific part/alter counts as consent for the whole system.

There is so much to say on this topic and I will likely revisit it at another point, but much of the safety tied up with DID and identity based dissociative disorders boils down to the fact that you are negotiating consent for a group and that you cannot always guarantee that the hypnotee at the start of a scene will always be present during the entire scene.

To that, I say treat switches like an abreaction, display acceptance and curiosity and don't get too hung up on the circumstances.

At the end of the day plural folx are just people too, just not person.

So... why did I write all this, anyway?

A lovely friend of mine recently joked that Charmed 2024 was the "Year of Plurality" and in a way they were right. I've been attending the event since 2020 and where my first had been a humble little class of 8 or so people on a Sunday afternoon ran by Vulpes Automata (Vulpes teaches the same class at Plural Positivity, albeit without the hypnosis content, a recording is hosted here) this year's event included many systems declaring themselves as such on their badge, both an in-person and online unconference that stretched beyond the time limits put in place and were feverishly well attended.

It has done my heart so good to see the safety and community growing and becoming more accepting.

It reminds me of the community's slow growth to accepting and embracing the transgender community in the mid-2010s.

Which is why I wish to be firm about trying to stop bad ideas from taking root in how we teach on these topics.

Some may remember that in the 2000s, respectable resources teaching hypnokink used to state firmly to "confirm biological sex" with any potential play partner. Said material has been revised. Times change and communities grow.

So when I see this teaching graphic saying that those who dissociate as part of a mental illness "Can't" be hypnotized, due to safety concerns? I get worried.

It was being used in a 101 class at the very same Charmed event that I am praising for having such good acceptance of plural experiences?

I lived this once as a closeted transgender woman. I don't want to live it again with our DID.

And I remember that "never play with anyone who has a mental illness" used to be taught in the same resources that once said to disclose one's "biological sex". People have taught this in classes and been approached by someone who had a mental illness and told how ignorant it was to teach that they could not be played with.

We, as a community, can do better.

I'd rather a 3 hour 101 become a 4 hour 101 and teach this material than to dismiss those who are the most vulnerable and susceptible and have them seek their trances from those who do not have reservations about safety and ethics.

Thank you for reading. I know this was a big soap box.

[loweya-blog]

Bullied MC

(Warnings: Bullying, harassment, gore, fighting.)

The brothers catch someone trying to bully you/mc.

Belphegore

He is initially shocked when he came across someone yelling at you in the halls. For one, you are a powerful magic user. And even if it was during a time in which you didn't have magic, you still had the seven demons by your side. Once the shock has faded.... he is pissed.

He gets defensive whenever his twin is even slightly at risk. The idea of anybody causing you active harm boils his blood. His eyes narrow and he swiftly gets in between you and the bully. With his temper flaring, there is no reasoning with him.

The bully's eyes widen as they felt a tail wrap around their neck, choking them tightly. Belphegore silently stared, hate swarming his mind.

"Don't ever touch them," He muttered dangerously, just so that the bully could hear it.

It took both you and Beelzebub to pry Belphegore off. Beel hurried the moment he felt something wrong. The bully ran off and Belphegore eventually calmed down and began cuddling up to you, as if trying to keep you close and safe near him.

That night the bully had the worst nightmares of his life.

Beelzebub

Beel was on his way to practice when he heard the cries of a human. A human he knew very well. His stomach dropped as he rushed into the hall. He could see a random demon looking down at you, spewing vile words at you. Beel was in his demon form in seconds and flew to your, getting in between the bully and you.

He wrapped his arms around you and formed a protective barrier between you and the other demon. Once he was certain you were safe and protected in his arms, he picked you up and glared darkly at the bully who dared to try to harm you.

Beel already lost his sister. He already felt the suffering of his twin and now he could feel your pain too. Each tear felt like his own. So he cradled you closely and ignored any of your protests. His eyes glanced to the bully.

"Leave."

It was all Beel could muster at the moment. His priority was your safety above all else. You had to be safe. He flew right back to the House of Lamentation and placed you on the bed. Then he'd get you anything you asked for, especially snacks and listen to you all night long. He would also text his brothers to inform them of the situation.

Beel cared more about you than revenge. Besides, his brothers were already halfway through tearing through the demon and promised to leave him something to munch on.

Asmodeus

You and Asmodeus were supposed to hit the boutique later that day to get you both some matching outfits for an event. He preferred having people wait on him but for you? Asmo would wait for you any day. Besides it gave him some time to check his devilgram.

But.... you were taking a long time to finish up with whatever you were doing so he decided to go look for you, only to find some asshole bothering you in the halls, saying vile things to your face. THAT was something he'd never tolerate.

He slammed his heel right in the back of the demon's head, kicking him far away from you. Asmo had gone into his demon form and had wrapped his scorpion tail around you protectively, carefully combing his manicured hands through your hair to make it look nice again. He cast the demon who was bothering you a glance then smiled.

"Get on your hands and knees. Beg my darling for forgiveness," Asmo demanded with his every charming smile. His eyes.... were of blood lust.

He then guided you back to HOL or wherever you needed to go to calm down, using his charm to force the bully to remain on their knees and begging for forgiveness until their vocal cord was ragged.

Meanwhile back home you were pampered in his bath and reminded over and over about your beauty and pure loveliness.

Satan

Satan was having a lovely day. Satan was going to go to the cat cafe with you. Satan was feeling just fine.

Until he saw someone daring to press you against the wall and spouting horrid nonsense to your face. But it wasn't just that. The thing that truly set him off was that look of fear and the tears forming in your eyes.

His heart was pounding with wild fury as he snatched the bully from behind and slamming him into the ground. Every part of his mind screamed for revenge. He NEEDED to tear this bastard limb from limb and drag him through the halls for daring to make you suffer.

"You will feel every once of pain for daring to harm them!" His voice boomed through the halls.

It was only your touch.... your hand that brought him back to his senses. He could see you were still upset and shame boiled in his stomach. Satan didn't want you to have to stand up for the person who caused you harm. It was unfair. He let the demon go and immediately wrapped his arms around you, still seething in rage but calmer now he could hear your voice.

The two of you left for the House of Lamentation. There he would read to you and talk about what happened. He was careful to follow his psychology books and allow you to direct the conversation and sought to any of your needs.

Later.... when you were asleep.... he hunted the demon down. He wouldn't just kill the fool. That would be too obvious. He had a whole line of curses to try out on his foolish victim.

Leviathan

When his player two didn't show up to go to the Ruri-chan themed arcade with him, he was worried he'd been ditched. Of course. Nobody would ever want to go to an arcade with a disgusting otaku like him...

When this pessimistic demon turned a corner... for a moment he was stunned. A demon was spewing insults at you in the hall. YOU?! The most amazing beautiful handsome fantastic person he'd ever met? Then.... instant anger.

Leviathan didn't get angry easily and when his temper flared it was quick and over with in seconds, leaving him to sulk. He'd summon Lotan if Mammon stole his items or his brothers teased him too much. But.... the sight of a demon bullying you. Lotan was summoned immediately.

And Lotan also drenched everyone involved, including you. Leviathan immediately ran up to you with wide nervous eyes.

"I'm so sorry! I-I just wanted to soak him I didn't think in the moment and it's all my fault. ImsosorrypleaseforgivemeIjustwantedto-"

You managed to calm him down and the both of you escaped to the HOL. Leviathan didn't even want to go to the arcade anymore. He just wanted to take care of his player two. The both of you played games, watched anime and talked about whatever to get your minds off of what had happened.

As for the bully....well.... Levi may or may not have hacked into all his accounts and sent all the grim he could find to your account. What? It was just compensation for the harrassment!

Mammon

The greedy demon was absolutely stunned to see that you weren't immediately on board with his scheming to steal from his brothers to get some extra grim. Actually? no. He wasn't that surprised. But he always offered to let you join on his schemes.

Just as he was about to go start his plan.... he saw you in the hall with another demon. At first his jealousy flared. Who was this demon? Why were they talking to HIS human? But when he realized all the shitty things that demon was saying, that jealousy turned to pure protective fury.

"Oi! Hands off my human!"

Before the other demon could even react, Mammon had sped at him full force and shoved him away from you. He was in demon form and had his teeth bare as he glared at the other demon. He then stood upright and looked at you.

"Lets head home. I got... uh.... you need to stuff for me! Yeah. That's right."

With that pathetic excuse, he dragged you back to HOL where he would cuddle you all night to remind you that you were his treasure. T R E A S U R E. That meant precious, no matter what the bully claimed.

Suddenly the target of all his money grubbing schemes shifted from his brothers to this bully and were ten times crueler. He'd use it to buy his treasure somethin nice to remind them how they shine.

Lucifer

He was late that evening due to paperwork and afterschool responsibilities from RAD. Lucifer hadn't expected you to wait for him during that time but according to a text you sent, you did. It brought a subtle smile to his face as he finally packed up for the day.

The moment he saw that demon harassing you, that smile was gone. He strutted right up to the demon and pulled him off of you immediately.

"Are you alright?"

His entire focus was on you while his grasp was on the idiot who dared to attack you, and tightening every moment. Unfortunately his position made it difficult to immediately lash out like his brothers did. He couldn't damage the reputation of Diavolo. But he was a clever demon and knew how to handle things properly.

First, he would take excellent care of his beloved. He tossed the other demon aside like they were garbage and swiftly picked you up like you were some sort of princess. In moments, you were safe and sound back at the HOL. Specifically his room.

From there, he'd pamper you and soothe you in every way. If you wanted hugs, he'd wrap his black feathered wings around you like a safety net keeping you warm. If you wished for food or entertainment, he'd pour a glass of the finest demonus and put on one of his records. You'd be treated like a queen for the night and constantly reminded how regal you truly were until he could feel your heart overwhelmed with pride.

And when you were fast in his bed, asleep.... then he would handle the bully. He'd assess their weaknesses and strengths first. Then, he'd meticulously pull apart the bully's life thread by thread until everything unraveled. Friends would abandon the bully. Companies would refuse the bully any sort of jobs. Even random curses would appear from which the bully couldn't escape. To seal the bully's fate... Lucifer would have the bully's crimes come to life, expelling them both from RAD and any other place of importance.

All the while Lucifer would spend with you, showing you how lovely you truly are.

[ruddyhotelau]

Hello, by the way, your work is amazing and I try not to miss anything or updates🌟

I have a question. I knew a lot about Emily and Lute's🥰💞, but what about Michael and vox's? How did their relationship start???

JusticeStatic's storyline in the AU begins after the main series ends. Vox was guilty of a felony, but thanks to Emily's success in convincing Michael, Vox was given a second chance to prove that he could change under Michael's strict supervision (This was Emily's idea).

So the two of them were stuck with each other and Vox had to live in Michael's palace so the King can have a better watch on him. Both Vox and Michael inherently did not like each other, but in the situation of having to be together, the two of them gradually got used to the other's presence. Over time, Vox also put away his charming, fake businessman mask because he knew that mask had no effect in front of the King of Hell.

Originally, they didn't even intend to talk to each other, but because Vox had most of his power sealed and Michael's palace was quite boring, the TV demon often appeared to bother Michael, making him feel extremely annoying. However, over time, Michael also discovered many aspects of Vox that he did not think existed.

Vox might not be as stupid as Michael thought. At one point he attempted to throw some unimportant papers to Vox for him to handle, but mainly to make Vox shut up. Unexpectedly, beyond Michael's expectations, the demon completed the assigned task quite well. Even with the sharp eyes of a businessman, he also came up with solutions that Michael had never thought of. This also left a good impression of him in Michael's eyes.

On a rare occasion that they had a serious conversation, Michael had always thought Vox would enjoy watching humanity writhe in crime and chaos, love to witness people's suffer but turn out, Vox just didn't give a damn about that. Don't get him wrong, Vox sure loves chaos and pain for others but that never is his number one priority. The demon only cares about what will bring most benefit for him, for his wants. If people being happy means he would get closer to his goal then he will make sure those bitches keep their smile still on their faces by one way or another.

While Michael hates the idea of sacrificing everything for desire, Vox is infatuated with it. For him, it is the blind pursuit of desire and stubbornness because of greed that makes human life in hell even more bustling, exciting and unpredictable because every day will pass like a mysterious and exciting gamble. Compared to angels who suppress their desires and live aimless, boring lives, wouldn't it be happier to pursue their ambitions and taste the sweet fruit at the end of the road? Like Princess Emily, for example. Didn't her dream also originate from desire?

Having finished speaking, he smiled a cold, evil smile of a scummy bastard while slowly enjoying the glass of Whiskey in his hand. At that moment, the King of Hell felt that the demon in front of him was no longer the usual flat faced TV that he knew. He vaguely saw an image of a sharp businessman in his 50s, proudly showing off a pile of money stained with innocent blood - a terrible bastard. Michael was disgusted by him, but he also didn't expect that the idiot he always despised would have such "profound" moments...

And it was also extremely interesting to see the person Michael thought was sharp a few hours ago turn into a rowdy child after losing a game of chess, just few taunts from Michael made the demon angrily flipped the chessboard.

In the end, Vox is still a hundred years old man, the "silence" between them will still happen. The moment the two stood side by side without saying a word.

The moment when Vox could be quietly smoking outside the balcony while Mike soon noticed from afar. Different from the look that irritated Michael the day before, different from the look with a sly smile the other day, even more different from the look of a noisy from before... There is something more "real" about that cunning demon. And before Michael knew it, he had unconsciously walked towards Vox.

Vox quickly realized Michael's footsteps were approaching. He turned back to look at the fallen angel and his expression immediately changed. He smirked and teased Michael a few words. Vox braced himself for a punch to land on his screen, but it never came.

This time, Mike just glared at Vox before ignoring the rest of his words and silently watching the explosions and screams from the city in the distance. Vox saw that the person next to him had no reaction to the sarcastic words. He could only roll his eyes in annoyance, then leaned back against the railing to light a new cigarette.

In that moment, a rare sight occurred. The King of Hell was currently calmly looking out at the chaos from afar while the demon he had always despised quietly leaned his back against the railing while inhaling a rich cigar…

Immersed in his own thoughts, Vox didn't notice when Michael's hand reached out. Michael was always curious about the taste of those cigars - the drug that always filled the body of the man next to him. Why is he so addicted to it? Perhaps today, Michael will break the rules and let himself try something "toxic"...

Michael suddenly snatched Vox's unfinished cigarette away, making him startled and upset, shouting, "Hey!" Michael continued to ignore Vox and slowly imitated the other person, taking a gentle breath. Gray smoke poured into his mouth, making the King of Hell frown slightly. The taste was exactly as he expected, extremely bad and completely unappealing... But Michael did not throw it away, instead continued to bring the cigarette to his lips and slowly enjoy it...

His thoughtful appearance while smoking and the image of the cloudy smoke escaping from the his dry lips made Vox's choke a bit, his face suddenly slightly warmed up. Uncomfortable with his own unusual thoughts, Vox turned to the other side of the railing, feeling the blood-scented Hell wind blowing onto the screen, causing Vox to relax a bit... And that wind also brought the smell of coffee that he always loved from the smoke of the person next to him...

Vox frowned slightly, then leaned his whole body against the railing, looking down... A rare peaceful atmosphere, both were immersed in their own thoughts and did not mind about the other's presence at that time. It wasn't until Michael finished smoking that he quietly walked inside, giving Vox back the quiet space.

A moment later, out of habit, Vox reached into his pocket to take another cigarette, but this time he discovered that the pack was empty. Vox stared at the empty cigarette box for a moment while his thumb gently rubbed the golden letters on the box. Then, suddenly and without thinking, Vox flicked it, sending the box flying down. Luckily Michael wasn't there to witness it, otherwise Vox would have had to hear him complain about littering again. Standing just a moment longer, Vox turned on his heel and walked back inside, silently closing the balcony door.

_____________________

Basically, their relationship will start really slow. It's a long amount of time to change from hate to love. Like it just their slice of life of understanding more about each other and find out that maybe the other wasn't that bad and eventually, slowly open themselves with the other and enjoy each others' company... This just some of what happen in their daily life when they live together. Sorry if you guys found them kinda messy and hard to understand because our explanation is kinda long and not to the point much. I guess t is is more lia an oneshot than a real ans to er the question.

But I hope you guy can at least see some reason behind why we ship them and even love them as we do?

If you can read to the end and see my silly ranting then thank you so much for reading this. I really appreciate that!!! >=333

Bonus some JusticeStatic arts for you guys who don't use X

[seat-safety-switch]

In my town, there are a surprising number of people who have been killed by leprechauns. Whenever I travel, I always ask folks: how many did the Lucky Charms guy "get" here? After some confusion, the answer is always zero, and I could never figure out what was going on.

Now, I'd traveled to some shitholes on business, back when I had a real job and hiring managers didn't spontaneously combust upon reviewing my resume. Akron, Ohio. Dayton, Ohio. Toledo, Ohio. Columbus, Ohio. None of these places had feral fae coming out of the woodwork and slaughtering innocent folks in the woods. Not a single one. So there had to be something wrong with where I lived.

Fearful of death, I constructed in my place a homunculus: an artificial human. This crude replica, soulless and doomed to a short life of excruciating pain, would travel into the woods in my stead and collect valuable data vis-a-vis leprechaun-being-killed-by. A lot of people ask about this part, and honestly it's one of those things you just can't teach. You either know or you don't know how to fabricate a lifelike humanoid that will learn unimaginable suffering for little reason other than idle curiosity about where all those football players went to that one year.

Anyway, after only a few dozen attempts, I was able to at least figure out the general geographic area where the leprechaun lived. Sure, I had to go through a lot of curses, blood sacrifices, and expired luncheon meat, but it was all worth it in the end. Got a show on Discovery Channel about the whole deal. The only stipulation in their contract was that I can never reveal the truth about the leprechauns, because then folks would stop watching.

So come and check me out at 9pm (8 central) as I attempt to figure out a small, but tantalizing, truth about the Ethereal Killers Beyond Our Realm. We're also going to restore and paint a 1988 Lincoln Continental for a celebrity.

[nyoomerr]

How about half demon SY fic? Maybe with some Cinderella-esque elements?

I can easily imagine Airplane making another half demon (of the non-heavenly variety) as a character foil for Binghe.

The original version was regularly mistreated by his full demon relations, saw them sucking up to the also half-demon emperor (maybe even trying to marry off a bratty full demon half-sister), and in his rage set up some dramatic ‘revenge’ plot that ended in his death.

Of course, with Shen Yuan in the role (and not wanting to die like the OG-version), he somehow bungles the whole thing into a seduction instead.

i'm not sure about cinderella-esque, but here's some half demon sy taking pity on things he really shouldn't be taking pity on, lmao

---

Luo Binghe was not the only half demon in Proud Immortal Demon Way, of course. Between cultivators that wanted to get a little freaky with it (weird) and demon lords who took human women as war prizes (downright terrible), there were plenty of occasions for mixed breeds to be born. 

Luo Binghe was, however, the only successful half demon.

His spiritual pathways developed perfectly suited to balance demonic and spiritual qi without getting the two energies tangled, and none of his demonic traits interfere with his human ones as so many other half demons experience. His demonic teeth sit without discomfort in his human mouth, he has no extra demonic appendages that struggle to reconcile with a human circulatory system, and his claws don’t even bleed when he retracts and extends them in a way that would cause any other half demon to be crippled with pain.

Perhaps it’s a result of his miracle healing blood parasites working overtime to keep his body from sabotaging itself; perhaps it’s simply the protagonist halo at work.

Either way, the less fortunate half demons of Proud Immortal Demon Way had every reason to despise Luo Binghe. Most of them did, or at the very least started off that way - several partly demonic women had of course been won out in the end by charming smiles and the discovery of just what other benefits Luo Binghe received from his successful mixing (read: his monster dick).

Shen Yuan had not transmigrated into a woman, though, and the character he had landed inside of had been one of the less fortunate half demons Luo Binghe ever stumbled across. 

Shen Yuan’s body had tried to grow both human and demonic ears alike, one on top of the other, warping each other and resulting in permanently impaired hearing. His pupils were stuck in the large, open shape of the sorts of demons that live almost entirely in the dark, but his human retina was not similarly adjusted, and Shen Yuan suffered near constant migraines whenever he went out in the sun. His teeth were made of rows of sharp needles, but his diet had not adjusted to allow him to eat as much - or as raw of - meat as his demonic ancestry had prepared him for, to say nothing of the way the sharp points of his teeth always left his mouth bleeding.

It was miserable. 

Even the good parts - the interesting parts, the things like the way his hair looked iridescent in the light or the general increase in energy and durability that Shen Yuan got to experience - did not seem to make up for the downsides of his mixed blood. 

And that was all before taking into the account the way that Shen Yuan was nearly entirely shunned by both demonic and human cultures alike, too.

Ah, it was unfair!! What kind of transmigration experience treated its host so poorly?! What kind of shitty wish fulfillment left the victim so deeply unfortunate?! Shen Yuan wanted a refund, damn it!!

If there was one saving grace to the situation, it was that Shen Yuan was not beholden to the plot in any way. The original host Shen Yuan had taken over had, in the later chapters of PIDW, been one of the prominent figures at the head of an attempted coup. His resentment towards his own life had burned and burned until he’d redirected it at Luo Binghe, a symbol of unfair success that he would never see, and he’d gotten himself barely half a paragraph in PIDW to describe his vengeful death for his troubles.

Shen Yuan refused to be such a small footnote in Luo Binghe’s life. If he was going to suffer by living in this world, then he’d wring every bit of joy he could from the world that causes that suffering. 

Naturally, the only good thing that this world offers is Luo Binghe himself.

“My Lord,” Shen Yuan demures, his tone hushed as he bends to refill Luo Binghe’s goblet. 

He had not been able to win a direct audience with Luo Binghe; outside of Luo Binghe himself, no half-breed is considered of good enough standing to be allowed the emperor’s time in such a way. Instead, Shen Yuan had taken a job as a servant in the Underground Palace, carefully biding his time and working his way towards this very moment, where he’d get to lean in close to refill Luo Binghe’s drink during a meal.

Luo Binghe cuts a sharp glance at him, then at the drink Shen Yuan has poured him, but says nothing.

“My Lord,” Shen Yuan says again, wetting his lips nervously. “The cursed mirror you seek is in the Fire Grass Marshes.”

Luo Binghe hums, his expression unreadable. “And how does a little servant know of such a thing?”

Shen Yuan swallows thickly. ‘I read it in a story about you in another world,’ isn’t exactly the sort of answer that would cut it, here. He can’t just brush it away as rumor, though, either; Shen Yuan needs to prove that he is uniquely useful to Luo Binghe. A usefulness that will both excuse his impudence in approaching Luo Binghe this way, and will allow Shen Yuan to remain close to Luo Binghe in the future.

Shen Yuan will not lose this gamble.

“This lowly one is a half demon like my Lord is,” Shen Yuan says, voice hushed. “My Lord is blessed; the rest of us are -”

Shen Yuan’s words catch in his throat. He’s only been in this body for a little under a decade, but it’s still - the hardships he’s had to endure, and the discrimination, and - Shen Yuan swallows again, trying to steady himself.

“In general, half breeds are not accepted in either culture,” Shen Yuan finally says, voice still low and deferential. “We have had to find livings in places that are not generally hospitable.”

“And you’ve lived in the Fire Grass Marshes as a result, then?” Luo Binghe asks.

Shen Yuan nods. The rest of the dining room has fallen silent by now, watching closely as Luo Binghe considers the daring little servant that has approached him as such. It makes Shen Yuan sweat, just a bit, but then again…

Their attention is not nearly as heavy as the single-minded focus of Luo Binghe himself. 

“The Fire Grass Marshes may not be worth the trouble to retrieve such a small item,” Luo Binghe says after a long silence, turning his gaze away from Shen Yuan at last. “There are other artifacts this Lord can use instead.”

Shen Yuan… maybe panics just a bit. He didn’t make this much of an effort to have Luo Binghe’s attention only to be dismissed outright like this, as if it isn’t worth the bother, ah!!

“Of course, my Lord wouldn’t have to fetch it himself!” Shen Yuan rushes to say. “That is, this lowly one can - if it pleases my Lord, I mean - for you -”

“If you’d offer to fetch it yourself, why didn’t you simply bring it with you now?” Luo Binghe asks blandly. Then, a bit more dangerously, he adds: “Don’t waste this Lord’s time, little servant.”

“If the mirror isn’t good enough, this servant can fetch something else,” Shen Yuan tries. “This lowly one knows much about lands that aren’t usually fit for exploration, so -”

“Why?” Luo Binghe interrupts, turning back to once more fix Shen Yuan with his full attention. “The only reward you will receive is your life, should I decide to spare you for the insolence.”

Shen Yuan swallows thickly, once, twice. He needs to fix this, or else his life - if he manages to keep it - will only end up more miserable than it was before. 

He refuses to go back to that, not now that he’s managed to be so close to Luo Binghe.

“This lowly one only wishes to help spare my Lord of unnecessary suffering -”

Luo Binghe stands suddenly, his chair tipping behind him and the dishes on the table falling and spilling at the sudden jostling movement.

Shen Yuan doesn’t much notice, what with the way Luo Binghe has wrapped a single large hand around his throat and begun to squeeze.

“Do not dare to speak of my suffering,” Luo Binghe snarls, his teeth inches from Shen Yuan’s face. “Do not dare to presume to know what I can and can not tolerate.”

Shen Yuan gasps, scrambling with his stupid, defective claws at the hand around his neck.

“I’m sorry,” he manages to choke out, “I’m sorry, but - but regardless of what you can tolerate, you shouldn’t have to suffer at all, it’s -”

Luo Binghe’s grip tightens, and Shen Yuan falls silent, focusing on trying to breathe. 

He does not break eye contact with Luo Binghe, though.

Because this is the truth of it: Shen Yuan’s mixed breed body sucks ass, and he’s suffered for it, and he’s been humiliated for it, and even the cool, kickass parts of transmigration have been kinda lame for it. He kind of hates it. He more than kind of understands the resentment that the original goods had harbored.

But Shen Yuan has the insight of a PIDW reader, and he knows that despite his perfect biology, Luo Binghe has suffered far more than most half breeds have. 

Shen Yuan and his kin are shunned, but they are not outright beaten or discarded or starved or pushed into the Abyss. They may be given shitty jobs, but they are given jobs; they’ve never had anyone try to sabotage their cultivations or been forced to overturn the demonic hierarchy just to find a safe place to sleep. Most people dislike them, but those that do care for Shen Yuan and other half breeds like him can be trusted; their regard is honest, as it can not be motivated by any sort of desire for power or influence.

Shen Yuan has suffered, but he has also experienced luxuries that Luo Binghe has not. 

He’s suffered, and he’s hated this stupid fucking transmigration, but - 

But in the end, he could have found ways to enjoy it that didn’t involve walking up to the protagonist and offering to help. He could have used his meta knowledge to get rich and powerful enough to explore the world on a cool vacation, instead of trying to use it to bargain for a spot at Luo Binghe’s side.

“Binghe should have someone looking out for him,” Shen Yuan wheezes. Maybe wheezes. Maybe he doesn’t say it at all. His vision is spotty and his brain is a bit foggy and he certainly wouldn’t have dared to say such a thing if he was fully conscious. 

Luo Binghe’s grip slackens all at once, and Shen Yuan crumples to the ground, coughing. 

“You’ll get only one chance,” Luo Binghe warns him. It’s very clearly a threat.

When Shen Yuan manages to look up at him, though, his expression is not as cold and dangerous as it had been a minute ago.

It looks hungry.

[sugar-grigri]

What is a family?

Hello everyone, I'm in exam period so we're going to start with a very short analysis

We saw in the previous analysis, in chapter 152, that Denji wanted to be a CSM and that suffering, mental and physical pain, was inherent to being a CSM. Suffering was a claim for the protagonist, that of accepting his suffering to the point of finding pleasure in it, that of accepting that experiences can be painful, of not being protected

Especially by Nayuta, the control devil who can only conceive of happiness with one person, and that's enough for her.

But above all, I think that since Denji had accepted the fact of committing himself to the path of suffering, he didn't want Nayuta to join him, hence his desire to keep her away from him.

But what this chapter shows is that a family can't be chosen, it's simply there.

People do what they do, always projecting all their frustrations onto CSM, this faceless chimera. CSM is as much a good-luck charm as a match to be burned for bad luck.

Denji's dream of being seen was full of meaning, because what people see in CSM is precisely their suffering and despair.

Yes, CSM represents suffering - yes, you have to suffer to be him, just as he will only evoke suffering for others.

The contract with the fire demon was simple: become what you want. As he had suggested to Yuko, the thought-hearing monster was suitable for a socially eccentric girl who had trouble understanding others.

So when people try to burn CSM, they're burning what they want CSM to be: their suffering.

The lighter was an image that had already been introduced by Barem, who ironically presented himself as a CSM fan, foreshadowing the fact that many CSM fans had pacted with the demon of fire, fire capable of destroying them in return.

Burning CSM to make the wannabe CSM disappear always comes down to the same logic: CSM is there to save, whether this is done by reigniting him or by killing him.

So the fire is there to atone for the suffering, Denji simply tries to tell them that the fire is already there, burning down his apartment and his Meowy family and the dogs.

Why burn Denji? When he's already burning. He has already lost a part of himself.

Denji proclaims that he seeks suffering because he wants it to be his alone. He realised that even if he stopped being a CSM, those close to him would continue to be attacked as if the cycle had never been completed.

Denji has never had any confidence in himself, obediently following the rules laid down for him every time. Nayuta's rules, which symbolise this apartment, didn't work, and neither did those of the public hunters, because even if you respect the contract, suffering will always be the end result.

So Denji tries to free himself from all these rules, because they don't allow him to escape suffering.

He also tries to free himself from his loved ones, because it doesn't allow them to escape either, but humanity won't let Denji be free.

Denji had made it clear that he didn't want to hurt mankind because he wanted to preserve the last link that bound him to them: the kiss he had with Asa (Yoru). He doesn't want to belong fully to the demons, as Nayuta had recommended, but why not become one after all?

Denji loves violence, even against humans. He likes it because he is still CSM after all, a monster whose raison d'être is suffering. Yet the link that allows him to consider himself still on the other side is a simple kiss that didn't cause him any pain.

Because this kiss is exactly Denji's life, a touch of pleasure in an existence that is always painful. A boy who can't even say he can't betray humanity because he has friends because he has none.

Nayuta has never thought of her existence as separate from Denji's, the reason for her happiness, her beloved big brother. So she is now facing her worst fear: being cut off from this dearest of beings, being rejected by him.

But as they try to keep her away from her ailing brother, telling her he's no longer her family, she realises that this thing that rejects her, that hurts himself horribly, is still her family.

More to the point, it's the person behind this faceless monster who's reaching out to him, because CSM isn't a being capable of embracing with his chainsaws. Denji's arms are outstretched to him, as if he's standing between CSM behaving like a monster and his own anxieties: there's an obvious love there. She shouldn't see her fear in the foreground, what she should see is Denji.

This thing that dares to cut ties with her, to put itself in danger to the point of suffering so much, has never ceased to be her family.

The only way to see anything apart from CSM, apart from this figure of suffering, is to love Denji.

is to see the boy behind it.

A boy who can't stop laughing despite suffering, in a way that may be terrifying, but which gradually gives the impression of a brother forcing himself to smile to avoid putting his sister in danger. Look, I'm crazy, so stay away from me! And I don't want you anyway!

His laughter is as uncontrolled as his gestures, all acting as reflexes to keep Nayuta away from danger.

CSM is a being who belongs to neither world, hero of humanity when it suits them, hero of the underworld terrified by his fellow creatures, he is held responsible for both worlds, the suffering of demons and that of men.

But Denji may not belong to either world, but he does belong to a family.

Denji may not be seen by people, but he has been seen by a demon who loves him deeply.

The hero has always been hunted because he has never been accepted by humanity, suffering while swallowing that of others, he has always had to be rekindled, to serve someone once again.

And finally he's given permission to run away.

No CSM, don't swallow the suffering of others

It's hard enough to swallow your own.

Denji, you are loved by the demon of control who now agrees to do something unnatural for her, to allow you to escape her control, her vigilance, her protection. Because she knows she doesn't have to lock you up in a gilded cage to be able to find you.

A family always waits with open arms, don't they?

[fire-lizard-ro]

SO UHHHHH- Beware the darker themes ahead. I know people were probably expecting more smut from me, but I find it hard to write smut for the Aeons??? Who even knows how that would actually work-

Anyways sorry for the lack of smut. OTL

I will feed y’all some good Geppie smut later!

GN reader

CW: mentions of death, permanent maiming, breaking bones, sadistic and obsessive tendencies, loss of self

Lemme know if I missed anything. T-T

I didn’t really get into it as much as I could have, so I don’t think it’s too bad. But still read that CW, please-

When it comes to the Aeons, I refuse to believe that they understand human conventions, morals, or ways of love. I think that with them, it's very easy for them to be a yandere??? Sorta?

Once they are interested in you, they won't immediately take you. They'll likely observe you, being interested in figuring out what it is that had them interested in you in the first place.

But slowly they become more convinced that you are someone they want to keep by their side.

Once they've decided that you should stay by their side, they'd likely kidnap you???

And I feel like as an Aeon who doesn't empathize with human emotions just has to keep you because you make them feel something truly novel- Is this that "love" that they always heard those humans talk about? That thing that they strive for yet the Aeons couldn't possibly hope to understand? So no matter how far you try to run, they'll find you.

Yaoshi

With this particular Aeon, I can see their love being one that is harmful for humans no matter how sweetly they put it.

They don't understand why you don't want the protection of their path and the blessing of everlasting life they can give you. :((

At some point, they'll likely give you the curse of mara, turning you into something you aren't. It's all because they love you and can't bear to see your mortal form crumble to nothing over the years and your life come to an end. They just couldn't accept that. So one day they tell you sweetly to close your eyes because they have a gift for you. One that you can keep... forever.

They understands that it will hurt. Yes. They understand that you'll lose your humanity and really your sense of being- But that's okay! They can take care of you. They'll never let you feel pain or suffering after this moment. You'll just have to take this moment of pain to have an eternity with them. Okay? :))

Honestly I can't really see why any of the Aeons would keep a human or other mortal around when what they pursue is something that mortal minds cannot truly fathom. Like with Nanook....

Nanook

(Disclaimer: what I said with Yaoshi? Y e a h - THIS ONE IS DEFINITELY HARMFUL TO HUMANS AND IT’S NOT EVEN PUT IN A SWEET WAY LIKE WITH YAOSHI.)

They are literally seeking the destruction of all things. Those who follow the Path of Destruction even sacrifice their own health and bodies in order to gain power in battle. The Path of the Destruction is one that seeks the end of all things. But maybe there's a slim chance that despite seeking to destroy all creation, they would find you oddly charming. A cute little thing that they cannot seem to take their eyes away from. Somehow, to them, you are just as beautiful as the fiery destruction they seek to bring to the universe.

Obsessively watching you and doing whatever they please to you. Keeping you close at all times, trapped in their embrace as though their hands were a living cage. Again- No matter where you run, no matter where you hide… they’ll find you. Their love is also Very Harmful to Humans TM. Holds you far too tight without really realizing it. But if you try to pry their large fingers off or you squirm too much… they only squeeze harder. To the point that you feel your skin bruising, flesh becoming sore and your very bones creaking. If you actually manage to get away from them somehow, I’m not sure what will happen to you. Not to mention the fact that it will be very VERY hard to run once you’ve escaped. Aeons can probably traverse the universe at speeds unfathomable. And their piercing gazes leave no stone unturned. How could you hope to hide from such all-seeing eyes? How can you hide from an Aeon? Once they’ve caught you again… you probably aren’t getting away. They may break you a bit. Juuust a but. Enough to discourage a second escape attempt- And maybe even enough to make that second attempt impossible. You don’t really need to walk if they’re always holding you, right? Maybe if they… break your legs? Careful you don’t anger them any more than that- Paralysis from the waist down is also a dangerous, but possible option. You may be broken after that, but they’re the Aeon of Destruction. You’ll be beautiful to them even broken. :))

At some point, if this was you second attempt and you’re somehow able to get away without them breaking your legs- Or hell maybe they did but you are just stubborn enough to devise a way to run away again (though likely not on those twisted legs of yours). Point is- If this is not your first attempt at escape, it’s likely that word of what happened the first time has spread. I doubt there’d be a planet in the galaxy willing to harbor you when Nanook could easily raze their cities to the ground and destroy the very planet they live on.

Nanook is the Most Dangerous of the Aeons to catch the attention of. Because I think with them, the most realistic thing would be that you are always one wrong step away from becoming a beautifully broken thing. The grand and beautiful destruction this Aeon sought. For what greater love is there than making you an example of their reason for being, right? Right? :)))

Or maybe it’s because they cannot be bothered with you if you become too much of a hassle even if they fancy you. I’m not really sure how Aeons really work, soooo…. I’d honestly be careful around this one… Even though I’m sure most would be considering their intimidating stature and nature.

Lan

I wonder if Lan would find it fun to let you think you’d escaped them only to hunt you down. I mean. They are the Aeon of the Hunt. Yes that means more than just that, but. I can see it. Some sort of sadistic glee they have in the fear in your eyes, the pounding in your heart, and the panicked breaths you take when realizing they’ve found you again. But they’d never hurt you! No, no, no- They certainly wouldn’t… Right?

IX

I don’t think there’d be any getting away from the Aeon of Nihility. 💀

I mean- Considering what happened in the Simulated Universe when meeting IX, I think you know why. I don’t know too much about them and no longer have many spoons for this so ye.

Maybe will write more about the Aeons later.

Sorry for any wack writing and typos it’s ass o’clock and it’s time for my eepy ass to go mimimimimimi- Might fix it eventually if I catch it.

[another-goblin]

How Aventurine would process their relationship. Just some fun options to explore. I do ship them, but it will work with them being just friends. (I wrote "just friends" and realized that it would probably be the first time for both of them to have an actual friend, so there is no "just" here.)

1. I can see him possessing enough emotional intelligence to realize what's going on and allow himself to accept Ratio's care and reciprocate his feelings. It's quite a nice and comforting option to explore. It can happen immediately after 2.1 or slowly, with them continuing to work together or hanging out from time to time. It's nice to see that like 95% of all the post-2.1 arts of them are examples of this (it doesn't mean that I don't love the remaining 5% btw).

He might also see it as a giant gamble. ("For the first time in my adult life I allow myself to be so emotionally vulnerable, opening myself to get really hurt, but the risk is worth it.")

2. He said something about only seeing friends as tools. I think he often uses his charm and wits to win people over, to make them act in his interests, to make them think that they actually like him. As a kind of subconscious self-defense mechanism, he would convince himself that Ratio only acts this way according to his own cunning manipulations and should be discarded after he'd outlived his usefulness. (cue angst)

3. Psychological problems. There is a whole sad collection to choose from, all deep-seated and subconcious. Mistaking Ratio's care for pity and getting offended by it. Feeling like he's not worthy of love. "I suffered alone my whole life, where have you been all this time, now it's too late, I don't need you anymore". And countless others. There's no way he's ever going to therapy, so they'll have to sort it out by themselves.

4. The most delicious option (and by that I mean SUFFERING *looks at two previous options* that is, MORE SUFFERING). A big part of his survivor's guilt is the supersticious idea that he owes his luck to his family's death. The only people he ever cared about and who ever cared about him died because of it. Being close to somebody means danger to them.

He knows that Ratio wouldn't accept his superstition based concerns. So the only way to save him is to hurt him emotionally to drive him away. 

But. What if Aventurine overcomes it and discards all these supersticious concerns (as he should). They get closer. And then Ratio does get hurt. It's serious, like, he's in the hospital, he lost an arm, something like that.

Imagine Aventurine's panic: "I brought it on him, I couldn't protect him, the only way to save him from worse is to leave him forever, immediately." And Ratio, recovering from a devastating injury, the first time in his life when he needs (and expects) support - he's abandoned.

It would probably crush his underlying philosophy of doing big good things for humanity (the way he cured that terrible disease, resolved the universal energy crisis, and is currently spreading education because he thinks that humanity is worthy of it). I mean, it's easy to care about humanity from afar, detached from it. It's much harder when your first attempt at a personal relationship ends in devatating pain.

[winwintea]

the last hope - lee mark

PAIRING ▸ soldier!lee mark x fem!reader 

GENRES ▸ romance, fluff, angst, lots of angst, supernatural, wayyy too much angst

WARNINGS ▸ angst. and character death

SUMMARY ▸ [part of the last love series!] you've fallen in love with the mark, the soldier who wishes to protect the country. His life is a brilliantly burning flame, whereas yours is nearly completely, gone. no matter how much pain it causes, you'll never love another like him. even as he walks away to his main purpose in life.

WORD COUNT ▸2.8k (not proofread 😭)

AUTHOR’S NOTE ▸ suffer pt 2

PROLOGUE | MASTERLIST

Recently, your mornings-or more so, your afternoons had become quite a little circus. You hoped he might have woken himself up today, but he’s deep asleep, yet again.

Mark lay in his bed. Blankets upon him like snow drifts, burying him completely. “...Mark? Mark, it is afternoon. You must wake up.” There was no response from the pile to indicate anything was even alive under there. That’s fair. You’d learned by now that just calling his name wasn’t enough to wake him. You sighed in preparation for this trial, gripped his blankets, and yanked them up off him.

“Mmm? Oh… it’s you. Hi.” Mark just yawned, stretched, and grinned at you with an effortlessly charming smile.

“I swear I will send Ricky in to wake you up! He doesn’t seem to mind it.” “...I prefer you.” “What did you just say?” “I prefer when you wake me up. No matter how I slept, I always feel better when I wake up and see your face.”

“Is that so..?” “Yeah.” When he smiled, Mark was the sunlight filtering through a canopy of trees. There was an honesty to him that made you trust him. Which was how you knew he had somehow come to enjoy himself here. For he certainly didn’t smile at the beginning of his stay.

It was a surprise to yourself as well when Ricky lured Mark and the other humans here, hoping you might turn one of them. Out of all of our human “guests,” Mark was the most adamant about leaving. When you explained about the magic of this mansion and offered your sincerest apologies for Ricky’s actions- Mark accepted them. He began to let down his guard around you and gradually came to treat you as a dear companion. You hadn’t spoken so freely to anyone since you lost your family. With Mark, you felt closer to the self you lost so long ago. When Mark laughed and what a laugh it was- laughter crept out of yourself as well. His love of life illuminated the centuries old ennui that had wrapped itself around your heart. “Y/N? You’ve gone quiet.” “I’m sorry. My mind was wandering” You knew there could be no one in the world like Mark, just as he knew there was no one in the world left like me. “I believe I hear Ricky calling, I must go…”

“Wait!” Mark touched your wrist. “Will I see you tonight at our usual place?”

At your acknowledgement, he smiled. You left Mark’s room, touched your wrist where he’d touched you, and sighed. Humans are so warm. Or perhaps this is just Mark’s warmth you feel? You hadn’t expected it to happen, but it appears that after all this time, you’d fallen in love. You thought you knew better than to pine after mortals. And with no one else like yourself in the world, you sealed yourself off from ALL love. But love found it’s way to you. And it was both wonderful and confusing.

—

When the moon had risen in the sky, you headed towards “your usual place” to see Mark. “There you are, Y/N. I was wondering when you’d show up.” “I’m sorry. Did I keep you waiting?” “Only by about two hours”

"Two hours?! I did not! It's just barely sunset!"

"I'm teasing you! Let's sit down.” Mark was laughing at his joke; you looked at him wryly before sitting next to him by the window, here in your "usual place." While you couldn't provide Mark an exit, You’d given him full use of this garret. It had the view farthest outside the mansion… “What would you like to hear today?"

"I always enjoy your stories of the city."

"You're not tired of listening to me ramble on about it? ...Very well. It's your choice.” you watched the light in his eyes as he spoke animatedly about his home and life there. 

And you remembered your first conversation here..

"...You're still searching for an exit, I see. Why have you been in such a hurry to leave?"

"You ask me that, after trapping me here?!"

"I apologize again. But there's truly nothing I can do to release you until the month is up."

"…..But I must return. Somehow. There's something important I have to protect...My people. I am a soldier. I don't know how much news you get here, but the fighting continues to grow worse every day. ..The people live in terror. I have to protect them; to restore peace to this country. I know this country and her people will see the sun rise again. I believe in that. But I've also heard the whispers. I fear something horrible will sweep across the country before that happens. That is why I cannot remain stuck here while more innocents fall!” 

You felt the truth of his words; when he spoke, it was like you beheld that glorious sunrise in him. “Mark, I know this cannot atone for your entrapment, but I assure you, in a month, when the full moon comes- ...I will do nothing to impede your exit from this mansion; I will do all in my power to see you back safely to your home.”

“...Do you promise that?"

“I promise.” you were sure he would save his people-Mark, who burned bright as a flame. Your own flame was dying. To keep it going by feeding off of his-to take him away from where he needed to be-was wrong.

...It's funny to think back and realize. I'd fallen in love with him that very night.

"And as for the flowers, the old woman said-" You gazed at him, wondering how peaceful it would be if you could spend my last moments in his arms, listening to his voice…

“Y/N?”

“Hmm. Yes?” 

Mark’s hand came to rest upon your cheek. "Is something the matter?" As he touched your cheek, his pearl brown eyes gazed into yours.

"...No. Why do you ask?"

"You looked very sad for a moment.”

"You must have been imagining it." His hand drifted away. The more time you spend together, the more your feelings grow beyond your control. But it could not-should not be. You pushed your love for him down where you’d kept all the other precious memories from your life.

"The full moon is coming."

"..That's right. In just four days. "You don't need to worry, Mark. I haven't forgotten my promise. You'll go free and return to the city where-"

"What will happen to you?"

"...What do you mean?"

"What will happen to you once I and the others leave this place?" If you fail to turn a human by the full moon, your body will fail and you will die.

The knowledge of your fate would not change your decision. No. More than your decision and your beliefs, it was your love for Mark that rendered it impossible for you to turn him. You would want to uplift him, if it were possible. Not to expose him to the worst experiences of your own life.

"Why, nothing will happen." You waited a moment to see if the lie worked. "It will just go back to being Ricky and I, living here as we have for centuries. Oh, but I must make sure he doesn't get it in his head to lure anyone else here!” you cut yourself off there; anymore and it would feel like guilty rambling.

To your relief, Mark smiled. "...Nothing will change for you, then? If that's the case, then I will fight hard so that you, too, may continue to live in peace.”

"You'll fight...for me?"

"You might not be aware of the fighting going on right now, but that doesn't mean you'll be safe in this forest forever. But I will make sure that you and this mansion are protected, for as long as I am alive.” He carries so much already, yet he would add you to the things he wishes to protect? What a beautiful gift. 

"...Thank you, Mark..."

“You are welcome.”

—

Mark talked to you of his life in the world beyond this forest, until he felt your head touch his shoulder “..Y/N? Are you asleep?"

All he heard in response was your soft breathing. Mark touched a kiss to your brow. You continued to sleep peacefully, and he smiled gently at you. 

“...I had not imagined I would fall so deeply in love with you." His quiet voice melted into the night…

—

You had fallen asleep sometime during

Mark’s story. He woke you when the night turned cold. We bid each other adieu and you returned to your room, only to be greeted by Ricky.

"Madam, I did not expect to find you up and about so late”

"Do not fret. I'm on my way to bed. I fell asleep while talking with Mark."

"…..You fell asleep in front of him? How curious. You always shoo me off long before you're ready to sleep.”

"Yes. And I would do so to any other. You're right, it is strange that I slept in his presence.”

"...Or fortuitous. Madam, once more I implore you. With what little time you have left-!"

"Ricky, I cannot turn him. No matter how much I've opened my heart to him. No matter if I love him.”

“Then what is so wrong with extending his lifespan? I don't regret being turned. Except that I might live to see your end..” The ever stoic Ricky now pleaded with you.

 "I know you would rather see me live. …..That is how I feel about Mark. I would not force the sun to stay in the sky, day and night, until it burns itself cold. I wouldn't simply be ending his existence as a mortal, Ricky. Mark treasures his life. I would be destroying him!"

“My lady…”

"..Now it is late and we both should rest. Good night, Ricky.” It hurt to refuse Ricky, who had cared for you for so long. And it hurt to lie to Mark, whom you would soon say goodbye to forever… You hadn't expected after so many decades of sorrow you could still feel a pain this sharp..

—

Finally, the night came. The others had left as soon as the gates had opened… but you held Mark up for only a minute, so that you could give him a proper goodbye.

"The stables?"

"Yes, there's something I'd like to give you. A parting gift of sorts." You released your beloved steed, Suzanne, already saddled for a long ride, from her paddock. “I… want you to take Suzanne with you when you leave. She is yours now, Mark."

"Take Suzanne? I...cannot accept. She is too precious of a gift."

"That is exactly why I want you to have her."

"You have a long road ahead of you, Mark. Longer than the path out of these woods, and more treacherous." His eyes spoke his understanding "I fear for the injuries you may take; both the physical wounds, and the ones to your heart. I have seen many wars before retreating here. I know what they cost those who fight. And those who defend." He had told you much of his life; was he surprised to know we shared this? "Suzanne-she will protect you from all that would seek to harm you."

"...Thank you. I will take good care of her." You handed him the bridle. His hand stopped to rest on yours before the exchange. 

…That will be the last time we touch. This is the last time we’ll see each other.

Over a hundred thousand days accrued in your memory. You begged this moment to become one. "...You must get going. The magic of this place is fickle. You wouldn't want to be trapped here for another month, would you?"

"Yes, I understand." Mark looked at you, his pearl eyes catching the light of the last full moon. "…Will I be able to return here at some other point? To see you?"

"What?"

“...I can't imagine sleeping as well without you to wake me up. And Suzanne will miss you...No, that's not at all what I mean to say-" Mark seemed bashful. “Y/N.” Finding himself, he met your eyes. "I do not fear the battles that await me when I think you might be here waiting for me at the end. I want to see you again. I want you to promise that we'll see each other again."

I am afraid...I cannot make that promise without tears in my eyes…

Your eyes stung with heat. You fought back the drops that threated to spill. You really should tell him to forget this place and never come back. But if you want him to be safe against all the dangers he will face, then perhaps this promise is the best way to ensure that? 

"...Unless, you do not wish-"

"I promise! I promise I'll see you again." 

Mark smiled in relief and took your hand. "Just don't break your side of the promise. All right?"

"And incur the wrath of this city’s greatest soldier? I didn't get to be the last eterni by being a fool, you know!"

"Is that so? I figured you were the last because you were so much scarier than the rest!"

I love you so much, my clever soldier.

Of all the years you’d lived, these few minutes on the last night of your life were the happiest. If you turned to dust now, you would not regret it. But for one thing “...I'd like you to promise me one last thing."

"Anything.”

“..Live. Outlive everything that would try to harm you or put out your fire. Live as long as you possibly can!"

"I promise. I will live until I am old and tired and gray, and then I will live some more." We smiled at that. And then it was time to let go. We released each other's hands. "I will see you again, Y/N. Goodbye.”

“Yes. Goodbye…” Mark mounted up and gave you a last smile before riding off into the forest.

Your life was over. But you want all the happiness that you might have enjoyed, had you lived, to go to him. You watched until Mark was a distant shadow amidst the trees. Then you fell to the ground, your body collapsing as you did.

 ..This is...the end…

Weakly, you lifted your hand, thinking of Mark’s hand touching it as you did.

I wish...I could have…..kept…..our...promise…

—

..Many, many years passed. Mark, mighty soldier of the Regiment had become something of a legend among the people of the City. His success helped him rise through the ranks, and that, in turn, helped him to protect more people…

"I heard you'd barely said a word to your staff officers before running off. Did you go to your mansion in the woods again?"

"I might have.”

"And? Was she there this time?"

"…..No. It was empty as it's ever been. Like any old house that's been abandoned. I still don't know what could have happened..." 

Lee Donghyuck looked at his commanding officer and good friend and sighed. "Why do you still keep going, time and time again, year after year? Most men take their leave to find their reason to live. You come back from yours like you've just died.”

"Always so critical of me, Donghyuck."

Mark laughed a bright but somewhat tired laugh and looked up at the sky. "…..Honestly, it feels that way. That I'm being torn apart, piece by piece. But until the last piece of me is gone, I will keep our promise. I will see her again."

"What if she's truly gone?"

"…..Not while I remember her. Not while I believe. And not while I wait. I've never loved another like I loved her.. So I will keep searching. Until I am old and tired and gray. And then I will search some more.”

"I've seen you win fights with the worst odds, scraping together every ounce of life you could. You don't know how to waste” The two men exchanged a look of understanding. Just then, Suzanne raised her head and whinnied. Mark looked curiously at his horse, who seemed desperate to chase after something, though neither man could see what.

"...Donghyuck, I think Suzanne wants me to take her out for a little ride. I'II be back!" Mark let Suzanne guide the way. Running. Running toward some unknown destination… 

— 

She stopped at a hillside. Flowers covered the grass like a carpet. Standing in the center of it all like the jewel on a crown was a lone girl. She had her back turned to Mark, not having noticed his arrival. Even from this distance, she looked so familiar. 

"...Pardon, miss.”

Slowly, the young woman turned around. 

But it wasn’t you. 

perm taglist -> @lyvhie

[deathmetalunicorn1]

hello! can i get a nsfw Susano'o x male reader if it's okay who is the first emperor of Japan and maybe while they do it one of readers concubines or supervisor accidentally walked in on them...👀

-You groaned softly, lifting a hand to your shoulder, feeling it becoming stiff. When you ascended to Valhalla, you were pleased of the peace that reigned- no wars, no famines, no suffering, and as that’s all you strived for while you were alive, it was humbling but also heartwarming to see- you felt like you could finally relax.

-Only you didn’t get to relax. As the first reigning emperor, you helped around the Shinto pantheon, being a human representative, but you were lucky, as other pantheons were so kind to humans.

-Many of the gods you worked with not only respected you, but admired you, as you were so hard working- you never gave up in life, and you did the same in Valhalla- always striving to do your best.

-You lived on a large but quiet estate with servants who were happy to serve such a noble and just ruler, as they respected you as well, and you didn’t get many visitors, so it at least made for quiet workdays.

-“Y/N!!” your eyes closed, the serene quiet being shattered as you chuckled softly, hearing the voice of the one frequent visitor who always came to see you- and for good reason, as he was your lover, Susanoo.

-Many were surprised that the Sword God sought you out, knowing of your skills with a sword, but he was taken aback, seeing what a good leader you were.

-He was initially a bit much for you, a bit too loud and passionate, but you soon learned that those things made him charming, as he never failed to make you smile.

-He came in, seeing you hunched over your desk again, rubbing at your stiff shoulders and he instantly grinned, entering your home, removing his sword and quickly settled himself behind you, pulling you back into his lap, hugging you close before he started massaging your shoulders.

-The first groan that left your lips had caused Susanoo to pause, his eyes wide, as you sighed in content, “That feels so good.” Instantly he grinned, leaning forward a bit, still kneading your shoulders and you felt a full body shiver run across you from top to bottom as he pressed a kiss to the back of your neck.

-You quickly turned, your face red, “No-no- I’m still walking with a limp- ahh~” he hit another knot in your shoulders that had you melting in his hands, your complaints quickly dying as his hands started to massage you all over, “I just want to make you feel good Y/N~”

-You knew he was full of it because you knew that teasing tone of his!

-Ten minutes later you were writhing, kiss marks covering your neck and chest, your top open and around your hips as your hands were in his hair, holding him from behind as you were still in his lap as his hands were teasing you, helping you relax, as his fingers were pinching at your nipples, giving you a bit of pain with your pleasure.

-The door slid open, and you both froze, seeing two of your handmaidens there, holding tea and snacks, as they had seen Susanoo arrive and instantly, they both squeaked, turning bright red as they quickly set the things down and ran out, hands covering their faces while giggling.

-It wasn’t a secret that the two of you were seeing each other, but to walk in while you were in such an intimate way was so exciting as you were bright red, stopping all playtime.

-Susanoo was pouting lightly, laying on his side, eating a cracker, annoyed that you weren’t allowing him to finish what he started, despite you wanting to as well, but you put him in time out until you were done with the paperwork you were working on.

-Susanoo could only smile, he couldn’t wait to rile you up again!

[zuzuelectricbugaloo]

Bite my Heart, I See the Stars

Pairing: Cross/Epic, Crepic

Rating: Teen

CW: Biting is mentioned but nothing explicit nor overtly sexual is depicted

Word Count: Approximately 2.4K

Synopsis: Drabble oneshot request by @twinribbonz of Crepic being in a lovely relationship with a side of Cross’s fangs being appreciated in an admiring way.

Tagalog and Spanish Translations:

Buenos días amorcito — good morning my love

Sinta — cherished one; a name meant for the deepest of friends and most cherished lovers

Kailangan kita— I need you (more than anything); to need and want someone to stay by their side forever

Mi amor — my love

Querido — sweetheart

Hermoso — beautiful

Monsters adored the stars. Trapped Underground for centuries, monsters gazed up at the phosphorescent gems adorned throughout the cavernous ceilings, particularly in Waterfall, in wistful memory or fervent longing. To one day gaze up and beyond to those ceiling stars and stare into echoes of lights long past.

Epic was no exception. He fondly recalled the quiet moments where he’d promised to himself and to the azure flowers curling around his boots that he’d one day take his brother and they’d see the stars. Papyrus would babble about how his big brother was tall — an ironic factoid that never failed to make him snort when he remembered — he could just reach up and grab the stars for him. His younger brother was unable to comprehend the sheer magnitude of just how incredible the stars could be.

It was easy back then, when he bought paint and had a field day throwing splotches of ultraviolet paint at himself and his brother onto walls stenciled with constellations and stars and the sun and moon up in his and Pap’s room. The annoyance of yet another mess for him to clean up was eclipsed entirely by the warmth Epic felt when his Soul filled with pride and joy when his baby brother looked at him, like Epic had hung the true stars themselves.

Epic had always adored the stars. When a strange monster appeared one day, heterochromatic eyelights scorching with pain and DETERMINATION as he sliced through his AU and fought with Epic before he single-handedly broke the Barrier itself, Epic saw the stars in this strange skeleton’s eyes and he knew, as they chased each other and bantered and fought and Epic watched, mesmerized, as some of the light returned to those fiery red and diamond eyes, that this man would change his life.

And he was right.

Cross became his rival quickly turned ally against EpicGaster. Then his best friend. And eventually, his lover.

Cross had always been like the stars to him. Something incredible and precious, created to be admired and cherished. He’d always respected his best friend and how he persevered, determined to fight anyone and everything to bring back the family he knew and loved. But Cross didn’t want bloodshed, didn’t crave needless suffering and pain. He did what he thought was right and while selfish, still tried his best to be good no matter how easy it would be for him to fall further into the dark.

Yes, Epic knew both humans and monsters were made of stars right down to the marrow, to their very Souls, but not every starlight was the same. Even without the human’s Soul and determination attached to him, Cross burned, bright and blinding. His eyes always full of warmth and celestial light within the onyx void of his sockets.

Epic could gaze into those silvery orbs of life for eternity and never get tired.

His fingers slowly, gently, traced the porcelain quality of Cross’s zygomatic arch. Soft and smooth, his thumb glided up and down his lover’s cheekbone and felt his own tingle with mana as affectionate warmth bloomed in his Soul and curled up his chest and settled into a small besotted smile on his mouth.

“Buenos días amorcito,” Cross’s mouth parts in that charming quirked up smile he does as he murmurs in an amused voice rough with sleep. Diamond orbs of life gaze back at him under hooded eyes. Embers of galaxies glow to life within those entrancing orbs. They shine as Cross can’t help but tease, “See something you like?”

“Always sinta.”

Lilac bloomed across his lover’s skull just as his pleased grin stretched, his sharp fangs glinting as his widened mouth revealed the honed canines. Epic felt a thrill course down his spine at the familiar sight of those pointed teeth. His body ached with the phantom memory of those fangs gliding across and piercing his bones.

It was entrancing, a natural phenomena that you couldn’t bear to tear your eyes away from. How utterly, effortlessly beautiful Cross was in all that he is.

Cross’s sockets crinkled as he grinned. He leaned into Epic’s palm with an appreciative nuzzle. “Far be it from me to stop you from admiring a work of art,” he preens, reaching out for Epic’s face to hold him, too. “You don’t mind if I return the favor, do you?”

“Never.”

Cross’s pearlescent eyelights are hazy with sleep and ardor both. His hands cradle the side of Epic’s skull and he melts, the flood of warmth that filled him from that simple contact alone filled his skull with cotton-like haze while his own eyelights dilated into hazy orbs.

The soldier’s eyelights fluttered all over his lover’s admiring expression. From the low curve of Epic’s ardorous smile to his hooded eyes painted with mauve, the shadows emphasizing the darkness within his sockets and making his pearlescent and electric purple eyelights pop. He looked effortlessly dazzling beyond compare.

He also looked completely exhausted.

Concerned, Cross rubbed his thumb against Epic’s cheekbone. His Soul fluttered in time with a butterfly’s wings when he nuzzled into his hand. “Did you get any sleep last night querido?”

“Don’t need it,” Epic dismissed. “Kailangan kita, Cross. I need only you.”

It wasn’t fair. Epic looked so peaceful, so beautiful in this moment like he always did. Mismatched stellatus eyelights staring into Cross’s through hooded, besotted eyes, a beautiful glittering diamond and soft, twilight sunset, staring like Cross was the last thing he’d ever see. Like he needed to commit every detail of this moment to memory with his eyes alone or he would slip from his grasp and be gone forever.

Remorse simmered in Cross’s nonexistent gut when he realized that was probably an all too real concern for Epic, who’d already lived through the erasure of their friendship through Cross’s lost memories.

Epic had lost everything, lost the old Cross, and yet he still chose to remain by, to love, the Cross he was now. An entirely new person. That no matter how much Cross changed, Epic loved him all the same.

It made Cross’s Soul ache fierce enough that his eyes burned. Endeavoring to evoke magic to dispel the heat.

“We’ll figure something out,” Cross promised. “There’s gotta be something.” He closed the gap between them to clink their teeth together in a sweet skeleton kiss and gently rubbed his nose indent with his dearest friend’s. “You deserve a good night’s sleep, too.”

Epic’s low, pleased purr from the affectionate gesture prompted his own to echo the tender call. “Who says I don’t? I get to hold the “X-Event” in my arms all night long. Don’t think anyone else has that privilege.”

Lilac blooms across his cheekbones, warm and lovely beneath Epic’s hand.

“No.” Cross agreed. “Only you hermoso.”

Still, it bothered him. That Epic would suffer and there was nothing that Cross could do.

He leaned into Epic’s hand. Tilting his skull to the side to press a tender kiss into the top of his proximal phalanxes all the while he gazed into shimmering diamond and resplendent twilight. Well-versed in the exact location of the circular emptiness of his lover’s palm after many tender holds and gentle kisses.

“You’ve given up.” It’s a statement more than a question.

Shadowed hues of mauve not yet hidden by makeup underlie Epic’s sockets, emphasizing the mauve over his hooded eyes. His eyelights are bright despite their hazed orbular shapes.

“‘S fine,” Epic lets Cross curl their hands together as phalanges and metacarpals intertwine like porcelain ribbon. “Had this f’r’over twenty years, so ‘ve more‘r less learned ta deal with it.”

Cross’s brows remained furrowed and his mouth drooped in the corner.

“Really sinta, ‘s’okay,” Epic insisted. “Heck, I hardly even die anymore!”

Whoops. Probably not the best thing to remind his partner about when Cross’s brows scrunched up in a pointed, distraught frown.

But before Epic could disavow Cross from his endearing concern, Cross closed the distance between them and abruptly kissed Epic so earnestly that stars swam in his vision. When Cross pulled apart he trailed after him in a daze.

“We’ll figure something out.”

Epic sighed. He’d rather keep kissing Cross than discuss his perpetual sleep deprivation, but his love was a stubborn man. “Cross. I tried. I’ve lived through this on my own for this long, it just is what it is.”

“On your own,” Cross repeated. “But not anymore.”

Cross reached into the scant distance between their chests to place his hand atop Epic’s. Right above his Soul that hummed so sweetly within his ribcage in a yearning song that was only for Cross to hear.

“We’ll figure something out. Together.” Cross’s eyes blazed with his solemn promise.

The Soul of his dearest friend and only love echoed his promise in its song. The gentle hum of two Souls bonded and promised to the other to always care for, to remain by the other’s side, and to cherish and nurture the other as though it’s their Soul that beats within their chest and not their own.

He might not have faith in himself. But his resolve never swayed for Cross, the only one he had the utmost faith in.

“Okay.” Epic kissed him on his foreskull with all the love and devotion he held for the other skeleton pouring out his Soul. “Together.” He agreed.

Cross’s ribs vibrated, the low hum building in the back of his throat and traveling through his sternum revving like an engine until he purred outright. Endlessly pleased that his lover, his partner, his dearest friend, was full of selfless altruistic devotion for him and him alone.

It was instinctive action fueled by familiar repetition to pull Epic impossibly closer. The warmth in his chest hurts in the deepest, most glorious way. It was almost painful, the way his Soul was melting, unable to contain all the adoration he held for the other man.

Slow, unhurried kisses from that sweet mouth and to his jawline, trailing a path down the vertebrae of Epic’s neck and back up when Epic tilts his skull down to capture Cross’s mouth with his once more.

Another wayward kiss, placed atop his sternum after maneuvering the neck of his sleep shirt with an insistent rub from his nose indent, and Cross chuckled at the lofty sigh from Epic’s parted mouth.

Cross can’t help but tease after he places another kiss, this time in the crook between his neck and shoulder. “Always so vocal mi amor.”

Epic snarks right back, his decadent baritone lilted in his playful tone. “Bite me.”

His remark earned him a mischievous bite per request on his collarbone and Epic squeaks in surprise. “You’d like that.”

Violet paints Epic’s cheekbones as he half-heartedly glares down at the smirking skeleton with his jaw resting atop Epic’s sternum, Cross looking back with a face the picture of innocence.

That is, if it weren’t for the mischievous glint in his eyelights nor the way Cross fights to stifle his smirk. His fangs glint in the light and Epic is once more drawn to their honed edges and pearlescent shimmer.

“Totally unfair,” Epic complained. He reached out to cup Cross’s cheekbone, his thumb brushing against his fang in the corner of his mouth. “These oughta be classified as lethal weapons with how often ya use ‘em on me.”

“I haven’t heard any complaints yet.” Cross quipped.

“Nah,” Epic softened. His other hand joined the other in its appreciative touches and, unknown to him but all for Cross’s visual delight, his eyelights flickering into heterochromatic hearts as he stared. “They’re hot, yeah, but you look real good with ‘em, too.”

Slowly, his eyelights returned to Cross’s. “They’re strong and beautiful, like you.” Mesmerizing; he could stare at them forever.

Epic couldn’t deny there was a seductive appeal to fangs. He knew all too well how sensual Cross could be with his fangs with soft, teasing glides across porcelain bone and pseudo flesh alike, the manipulation of pressure as the incisors pierced through and sank in…

But there was an aesthetic to it, too, illustrating how Cross was beautiful and handsome both. Sharp angles emphasizing the smooth ivory canines that stood apart from the rest of the teeth. Only one aspect of a body honed after years of precise training with the purpose to serve and protect. These were the fangs of the most loyal, earnest, and deadliest man Epic had ever met. He adored them almost as much as he adored the monster they belong to.

The way Cross was eyeing his collarbones, it looked like Epic just might find his appreciation rewarded and he shivered as the focus under that predatory gleam.

Another time, maybe. Definitely.

After all, the day draws on and stops for no one.

“We should get up soon.” Epic noted.

Cross hummed, not disagreeing, but also, like Epic, unhurried and not quite willing to leave this tender moment just yet. “In a minute.”

When Cross leaned forward, Epic hummed his agreement, tilting his skull back to give the other access. His sockets closed, content, as Cross continued his affectionate kisses from moments prior.

His fangs lightly scraped the grooves of Epic’s cervical vertebrae, his false throat swallowing instinctively from the way he shivered as his neck was touched.

Cross could go further, they both knew this. But for now, the only bites he gave were soft and playful. Little nips interrupting passionate kisses here and there to prompt a lovely giggle or small sigh and shudder, Cross’s Soulbeat fluttering with every sonorous sound he draws from his beloved partner.

The words flitted to his mouth, buzzing in his throat and dancing on his tongue until he gave them life. “Hey,” he called out. “I love you.”

Epic smiled back, larger than life and if Cross stood his knees would go weak with how warm his silken voice is when he replied, “I love you too.”

They could start their day a little later. For in that moment, they were spellbound. Transfixed in their own little world, their Souls the universe in which their starlight eyes burn bright, miniscule nebulae resplendent with sidereus orbs of life. Mismatched in color, yet synchronous in heart.

All for you.

It’s a vow renewed when their mouths slot together and their breath becomes one.

For no one else but you.

Hands cradle their entire worlds in their palm as they hold each other close. Souls made of constellations, destinies forged with synastry of pain and melancholy until they’d found each other. Two of hearts that beat as one, two souls forever intertwined as one. Neutron stars bound to collide, their collision a kilenova rippling through space and time.

There was no rush to start the day. All that truly mattered was here and now with each other. After all, natural works of beauty were made to be appreciated. Bright like starlight, evoking wonder and warmth deep within Epic’s chest whenever he stared into those dazzling eyes.

Epic adored the stars. And there was no brighter star than his best friend.

[yourantag]

Rises the Moon (Ithaqua×Reader)

AN: 3 posts in a row? More likely than you'd think! The next is probably gonna be dropped on New Years since I heard if you post too much at once, you can get shadow banned. Still, gotta feed you guys the few things I've written before I'm dragged back to school. This fic was actually written in August for the Ithaqua server's Ithaugust. The prompt was "you forgot, but I remember." I was between hitting the reader with a car k-drama style or this, but luckily I ended up with this. Enjoy! Word count: 2.0k words TW: Mild violence, death, and yandere themes. Summary: The sun god has always loved the deity of the moon. Even as galaxies collided and the stars died, he has loved them. But fate is not kind, ripping you away from him. Again, and again, and again. So, even if you cry, he can only apologize. He'd rather confine you in these walls than lose you ever again.

"What do you think of mortals, my sun?"

"They're selfish fools who yearn for more than they need, so easily consumed by greed."

"My, such cruel generalizations. Not all of them are like that."

"Perhaps, but can you truly claim that most are innocent?"

"I suppose not, but I believe in it."

"Believe in what?"

"The good in humanity. I'm willing to bet my life on it."

-

The ebbing and flowing of time was as inevitable as the pushing and pulling of the tides, taking with it lives and memories of the past. With each rotation of the sun, the rise of a new moon, and the occasional visits of comets and asteroids from beyond, life continued. Regardless of the pain and suffering of those who lived on, the world continued to turn, just as time continued to march on. Sometimes, Ithaqua wished it would just stop.

Thirty million, two hundred two thousand, and twenty three years have passed.

Twenty five human lifetimes have come and gone, each one leaving him more grief-stricken than before.

Every encounter with you was as devastating as the last, leaving Ithaqua yearning to see you again while praying he didn't. Every time he met you, you'd steal his heart again, as if you could steal something that was already yours to begin with. Yet, still, he'd fall in love with you again and again, lifetime after lifetime, like a fool.

Each life only really started when he met you, held you in his arms, and loved you. Then, tragically, horribly, unavoidably, his life ended when you died.

The first life had been fine, the two of you born as commoners in some civilization long past. It was a hard life of surviving the elements, fending off wild animals, and trying to just live in a world humans had not yet adapted to. Still, however difficult it was, Ithaqua treasured the memories of that life as it had taught him so much about humans. 

Such resilient creatures, capable of persevering and creating. He saw just how brilliant they were, and just how stupid as well. They could take down animals twice their size and weight yet couldn't figure out how to navigate. 

Incredible. 

Regardless, sitting around campfires, singing songs, running in the fields and just living was invigorating. Ithaqua came to appreciate life and the small things within it; from the crunching of leaves to the chirping of birds, the blue seas and the cloudy skies. The views and experiences he'd never get to have as a god, the ones he'd never get to know or love as an immortal, even the very essence of fleeting lives became so, so very beautiful to him.

Humans were nothing compared to the gods, but when Ithaqua sat among them, talked to them, laughed with them, he came to find that you were right. Despite how difficult it was to live in this world, humans still held kindness for each other. They offered him food despite not having much for themselves. They offered him shelter despite not having much room. They offered him help despite needing help themselves.

Such complicated, foolish, yet oddly kind creatures they were, but that made them all the more charming. Ithaqua genuinely considered that the humans in this world were unlike the ones from the last, that they were truly good. They treated the two of you so well, and taught him so much.

The last lesson they ever taught him was just how far they'd go to ensure their own survival.

It wasn't something Ithaqua ever expected to experience, not when he had been a god his whole life. The rumble of the earth as it trembled under the stamping feet of hundreds of cattle shocked him. Fear bloomed in his heart as he saw animals he'd only ever regarded as sacrifices before becoming deadly, stampeding through the small village the two of you resided in.

He was lucky, or so many had said. Surviving such an experience by not being too close was a blessing. Yet, how could Ithaqua feel that way when you hadn't made it out safely? When he saw, from the cliff that watched over the village,  that a man pushed you in front of the charging cattle to save himself?

The bitter taste of betrayal lingered on his tongue for a long time, even after he had killed the man and everyone whose negligence led to the incident.

The next life was kinder, as though the world itself understood he needed time to process things and feel better. When he met you once more, you had given him a warm smile and a hug.

Ithaqua held you for a long, long time. He breathed in your scent, listened to the steady beat of your heart, and slowly started to compose himself. He hadn't even realized how distressed he was until he found himself calm once more.

The two of you caught up, explaining what had happened in this life, what you wanted to do in this slightly more advanced time, and more. At some point, Ithaqua had to ask you if you still believed in the good in humanity.

"Of course I do! Why wouldn't I?"

He wanted to say the obvious answer. He wanted to point out the fact that you died in the last life because of humans, because of their selfishness, their incompetence, their betrayal. Yet, when he looked in your eyes, seeing them clear of any feelings of hatred, Ithaqua let it go. If you forgave them, he would too.

Really, it should've been more obvious to him that it was a warning.

The gentle days of sitting in the sun, playing in the river, and feeling the pure relief of having you back had made Ithaqua blind to such a hint. He simply went on with this life, living happily with you by his side.

Though extremely wary, Ithaqua came to trust humans once more. Naively, he came to believe that perhaps, the humans of this time period were better. Perhaps, they were more civilized. With less of a focus on surviving and more so on improving the quality of life, things were more peaceful than before.

Ithaqua relaxed as he once more laughed among humans, sharing new jokes, reciting old poetry, and learning new things that had recently been discovered. You always smiled so sweetly when you saw him interact with mortals, so he tried his best to be more social.

"Talking with humans is crucial! It helps stimulate the brain and be happier. We're humans now, so we need to keep in mind what they need to survive."

Ithaqua would've loved to disagree, claiming that this vulnerable mortal shell was not who he was, therefore his needs were not the same, but his stomach would always disagree. Still, he vehemently denied being human, even as he ate whatever you had made for him. At the least, Ithaqua knew he didn't need to spend time with others. You were more than enough.

The moments he had with you were treasured more than any others.

He shared the first snowfall of his life with you, the soft specks of ice fluttering delicately in the wind. They swirled around you two as you danced, laughing as the surroundings became blanketed in white. Ithaqua thought, once again, that the world was beautiful. But, perhaps that was just because of you?

However, it seemed like only when the wounds of the past had healed that tragedy would strike once more. This time, it was a more targeted murder, one where they were out to kill you specifically. Poisoned to death because of jealousy, because of someone who apparently loved him and thought that, somehow, he'd love them if they killed you.

The first winter of that year was tainted by the blood on his hands, soaking into the snow. Red seeped into the ice and polluted the otherwise serene beauty of the frost covered land, painting it in ugly colors that seared itself into his mind. However, compared to the sight of your cold, lifeless, glassy eyes, the once comforting and kind ones that shined like stars in the sky, it was no travesty.

No words in the world could express the pain in his chest or the severity of this crime. Not even if the heavens fell or if the world itself turned its back on its inhabitants, nothing, nothing at all could be worse than the sin of robbing you of your life.

Ithaqua's heart ached more than his frostbitten fingers realizing that, this year, he wouldn't get to dance with you. Not this year nor the next, or the next, not until he died and was reborn to start the cycle anew.

Even after the first betrayal, the first death, Ithaqua felt incredibly hurt that he was betrayed again by humanity.

Still, he pushed on.

For you.

Yet, with each life that passed by, you recognized Ithaqua less and less. You forgot things about him, be it his godhood or the memories you shared. You were starting to forget yourself, not remembering that you weren't human, that this wasn't how you were supposed to be.

By the tenth life, you didn't recognize him at all.

You remembered nothing about your past lives, nothing about your godhood, not even his name, nothing, you remembered nothing.

You forgot.

Still, he desperately sought you out. In each life, Ithaqua tried to get you to remember your past lives, the happy memories, the bad ones, even just his name or the stupid bet, anything. It would be fine if you remembered that time he slipped and fell like an idiot. It would be fine if you remembered how he tried to drown a fish. It would be fine if you remembered anything, anyone, just as long as you remembered.

But you didn't.

And, every time, you'd die.

Again. And again. And again.

You fell for the trickery of humans time and time again. To their cunning, their cruelty, their evil. No matter how he tried to save you, how hard he tried to convince you not to trust them, it never mattered. Everything he did was futile, only ever allowing him to miserably watch as you died again.

Once upon a time, Ithaqua believed. He thought it was possible that, in another world, another place, humans could be kind. They gave kindness so freely, offering assistance and support with smiles, but in the end, the results were always the same.

Humans could never be trusted, not when he- you had been betrayed in every lifetime.

…

Twenty five. 

Twenty five lifetimes with you. Watching you get betrayed, watching you suffer, watching you die.

And yet, you remembered none of them.

It's no different this time, you see him and feel a connection, yet you don't remember him. You sometimes remember things about him like his favorite color, his favorite foods, even the things he hates, but it's always chalked up to instincts, nothing more and nothing less.

Ithaqua is tired. Tired of being forgotten, tired of being betrayed, but most of all, tired of losing you. So, there's really only one thing he can do. If you won't listen to his warnings, and if all of his efforts to protect you are futile, then the only logical option is to keep you away from humans.

It's not hard to get you away from them when you trust him with your life.

Delicately trailing a finger down your face, Ithaqua smiles. Blindfolded, chained, and trapped you may be, but you're still radiant in his eyes. Ever so brilliant and glowing, even within the confines of a dimly lit room.

"It'll be okay, my moon, all will be fine. Here, you are safe. No one can hurt you, and no one can take you away." Ithaqua drags his hand down your arm, watching you shiver. He pulls up the blanket on your lap to cover you more, humming lightly.

"You know, I'm quite a jealous man." He says off-handedly, rubbing a thumb over your knuckles, the chain around your wrist clinking at the faint movement.

"Death has had you for so long... would it be so selfish of me to ask you to stay with me for eternity?"

If you don't remember, it's fine. After all, he remembers, and that's what matters. Ithaqua can remind you as many times as you need. After all, you can't leave.

[nicalysm]

( DRAFT ) A.K.I. inspired! reader

𝗻𝗶𝗰𝗼𝗹𝗲'𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀: A draft of the original characterization for my SF! reader

When your mother died of drug overdose, you had no one to turn to but the streets. At first, you turned to thievery as a means of survival, but when you realize that it can't provide for you forever… you were forced to become a prostitute.

Just when you thought you already had it bad, you get abducted by one of your clients. He was a handsome man in yellow— charming and swooning, you fell into his trap and before you knew it, you were taken away to a world you thought only existed in the stories. But your life was not as lovely as the protagonists of fantasy books— no, you lived to be a lab rat for Shang Tsung.

To say that your life was hard would be an understatement, it was hell. It felt like your humanity was stripped away from you and you wondered, why were you born only to suffer?

After several days of having multiple drugs and poisons injected into you, you expected you'd die in a week or earlier. But much to your surprise, it had already been a month and you're still alive, rotting in this cell, weakened and still experimented on. You're immune to poison. But that doesn't mean that you were also immune to the pain.

Many moons passed and you slowly spiralled into madness after all the physical, mental and emotional abuse you had endured. Now, you are merely a shell of your former self.

[linalavender]

How Tatsuki Fujimoto writes Affection

First of all I would like to give massive credit to Tiktok user @campaign_baby for their Tiktok I saw on this that really made me think of it alot more

I will Bring up Examples from:

Shikaku

Mermaid Rhapsody

Goodbye Eri

Fire Punch

Chainsaw Man Part 1 (Quite a big spoiler in this will give fair warning)

Fujimoto has a sort of strange method he uses to write that a character Loves/cares deeply for someone. And its The character either being willing to be consumed or to provide sustenance to someone, Or to consume the other person. Examples:

Shikaku

After Shikaku confesses her love for Yucel, He rushes to the hospital to offer her his blood, Making her into an immortal vampire just like him. Yucel has also fallen for Shikaku, its basically his confession of love, He wants to live with her Forever.

Its drawn in a way you can tell its such an act of compassion too.

Mermaid Rhapsody

"I loved her so much that I thought, If it was by someone with a smile as pretty as hers, Maybe being eaten wouldn't be so bad."

Toshihides Dad feels the exact same way about his Mom as Toshihide feels about Shijyu. Mermaids eat humans, But that never mattered to either of them.

Goodbye Eri

In Yuutas Movie about Eri, He writes her to be a Vampire, because he wouldnt actually mind to be her sustenance, In his movie, he loves Eri so much. (I genuinely cant read this fucking story without sobbing, Rereading it again just to get this screengrab just made me cry for like 20 min help)

Fire Punch

This one is Pretty straight forward, Agni with his regenerative powers feeds his village by continuously chopping of his Arm so they dont all starve to death. But more importantly he does this to prevent his sister from doing it aswell. He doesnt want her to suffer that pain so he takes sole responsibility for providing himself to the village.

Agni also later feeds his followers with the help of Togata Chopping of the part of his face that isnt on Fire. I think this has more todo with making sure Togata gets fed rather than his followers, To Agni Togata means alot.

⚠️Chainsaw Man Part 1 (Spoilers for the Final arc)⚠️

When Power is about to Die, Power not only offers her own blood For Denji to Drink so he can get back to health, But Pochita also offers a small part of himself so she can come back as a Powerful Devil.

And ofcourse the big one is Denji Eating Makima. He obviously has to and all for the sake of erasing her. But he explicitly says it wasnt an Attack, It was an act of Love.

Its such a fascinating thing that the idea of consuming someone can be concidered something you do to a cherished one, as an affectionate thing. I guess as Denji mentions that you basically become one with eachother in a way if you consume them.

But this is such a Weird thing Right? Where does this idea even originate from? Well ofcourse we can only Speculate but I really think he took on inspiration from his own life here, Because he has actually done this to someone he loved. Yes, Seriously.

Tatsuki Fujimoto eating his deceased Pet Fish

In the Authors notes for "Tatsuki Fujimoto Before Chainsaw Man: 22-26" Fujimoto shares a story from when he was 24:

"Even though we were poor, we had a pet Japanese rice fish. I found it dead one summer. I went to toss its body into the trash like in Parasyte, but my girlfriend said she wanted me to bury it, So off I went to the park, alone. I tried to bury it under this big tree, but the ground was too hard, my hands got all dirty and I had no hole to show for my effort. Out of Options, I figured I would pretend I had buried the fish and left it lying there on top of the ground. As I watched it for a little while, ants found the body and began to carry it away. Im not sure what came over me, but in that moment, love for that pet fish welled within me for the first time. I brushed the ants away, and then Ate it."

You can read the full story here

It has that "Wait what the hell am I reading" Charm to the story like alot of his works, But theres something so weirdly beautiful about this story, Somehow stricken with grief and love for this fish, He ate it. As Denji says, its not an attack, his fish is part of him now and its an act of love. So strange, yet so Beautiful.

Anyways thanks for reading this insanely long post if you even got this far I appreciate it!