#The office is so scary
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Base drawing of Wukong


My reference photos ⬆️
Gonna do it like a painting rather than have line art but I needed a detailed (ish) sketch to go over the top of.
#jttw#journey to the west#sun wukong#monkey king#I have exams and it's horrid#Liu Xioa Ling Tou#Dicky Cheung#Never watched that film actually#But started the 1986 series#Uni is not gonna let me in with the way this is going 😭#I'm doing an art project for the next year and I need to pick a theme by Wednesday#I want one where I can draw jttw characters and Chappel Roan#Pls give suggestions#I have a new therapist (they seem to be passing me around atm)#She's great but I'm only seeing her until Summer 😭#The office is so scary#There's this emotion graph on the wall and the one for 'happy' is genuinely terrifying#If that is happy then I'm a tree#Sry for oversharing but tbf I doubt people are reading the tags anyway#This is my version of journaling#I think I'm gonna see if my phone will let me download the speed paint of this when I'm done#Love speedboats#I force my friends to watch them but they do the same to me so it's fine
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It's here everybody! Dungeons and Daddies the Manga is now possible for you to buy and to hold!
I'll have this store open for a few months to let orders build up before I place my own order to get the books made (I don't want to order 100 books in advance and only get 50 orders, leaving me with a ton of leftovers, y'know?), so be prepared to wait a while before it's actually in your hands.
Dungeons and Daddies the Manga is over 250 pages, and costs $25 CAD (~$18 USD) before shipping, which is about $2 less than the manga I most recently bought!
While you're over there, I also have a leftover sale for the stickers I made for the anniversary some months ago, so if you missed out on those, now is the time to grab them while supplies last! They're $10 CAD a pack (~$7 USD).
#dndads#dungeons and daddies#doodly#noodly#taylor swift dndads#lincoln li wilson#normal oak#scary marlowe#please buy these#y'all said you would#I'll put together a graphic explaining my stretch goals in a bit#for the merch bundle#tbh I'm so scared I undercharged for shipping#I'm gonna get to the post office and each order is gonna turn out to cost $60 just to ship#but if people buy the stickers which cost only a stamp to ship#that can cushion the shipping cost#so please buy those too#boost this please!
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I think the aspect of the 2.7 story that felt most impactful to me was something that was previously addressed in the Penacony main story, but was reemphasized and expanded upon with Sunday being the narrative focus of this update:
Sunday is scared.
His motivation to protect the people and things important to him -- Robin is an excellent example -- manifests as a desire for control, to eliminate potential dangers. This motivation is based in fear; he's afraid to lose what he has to factors beyond his control, like the bullet that nearly took his sister's life.
And part of the "true paradise" he longs for involves preventing the sense of powerlessness that accompanies that fear. He believes that humanity sleeps because "we are afraid to awaken from our dreams." Indeed, the appeal of the "sweet dream" of Penacony is freedom from the uncontrollable and inevitable tragedies of the waking world.
It's part of what made him such an effective villain in the Penacony arc; even though you may disagree vehemently with his actions, you can understand with and sympathize the rationale behind them. In his mind, absolute control over the Dreamscape -- the elimination of frightening unknowns -- is the most effective way to keep everyone safe and happy. However, this undermines the real freedom and autonomy of the affected populace, many of whom are unaware of the Dreamscape's true nature.
In the 2.7 update, Sunday is "nerfed after turning into a good guy," to use March's words. Previously, he enjoyed immense social status as the head of the Oak Family -- and as the imposing, invulnerable, "final boss"-style antagonist. Now, his role is effectively reversed; he's a fugitive who has to disguise himself to evade the potential consequences of simply being seen.
He's an incredibly vulnerable position.
Not just physically -- as the audience, we also get intimate insights into his feelings and thought processes. Now he recognizes the scope of the harm he was previously willing to cause in the name of absolute control, and shoulders the responsibility of dealing with the repercussions.
His newly evident guilt and shame is emotionally moving on its own...
...and becomes even more poignant when you realize that guilt and shame and vulnerability has been a crucial aspect of his character from the very beginning. After all, so much of his deep-seated fear of the unknown stemmed from him blaming himself -- his lack of control over the situation -- for Robin's unforeseen injury.
I found the scene at the Dream's Edge the most touching in this update. Sunday's conversation with Robin is a bit of a paradox: he is deeply sincere and vulnerable in speaking to his own sister, yet guarded because he must avoid revealing his true identity. And Robin, in turn, directly provides an alternate outlook on Sunday's character, describing him as though to someone who's never met him, as though he isn't there.
And Robin's perspective reaffirms that Sunday's apparent invulnerability was essentially a facade. He may have been the head of the Oak Family, and the imposing final boss, but at the same time, on the inside, he was continually paralyzed by fear.
Sunday has always been vulnerable. He has always been scared.
And I think what makes the conclusion to the 2.7 story so satisfying and triumphant is that Sunday begins to properly address his fear, his persistent guilt and shame. He moves beyond simply acknowledging it, and recognizes not just how indulging his fear can bring further harm, but also what good things (that otherwise wouldn't occur) can happen when he overcomes it -- as it were, when he doesn't let his fear control him.
I'm going to be real, I probably had an intelligent-sounding conclusion for this, but... it took me several weeks to write this and I've forgotten any idea i might have had previously, so let's just say he definitely hit me right in the feels. 🤣
#sunday#hsr sunday#honkai star rail#hsr#star rail#hsr spoilers#sunday hsr#idk man just. AAAGH#idk if I'll ever be over how sunday played with my feelings#i started the penacony main story back in like march or smth and this update came out in december#so that's a solid 9 months i spent legitimately terrified of sunday#like that one scene in his office with aventurine gave me probably some of the worst nightmares i had all year#so like. idk if i realized it consciously at the time going through this part of the story but#i think it hit me particularly hard learning that he was never as invulnerable as he seemed#like not that him being a big scary villain was fake per se#but in that his invulnerable persona was a fundamental misconception of his character#that is perhaps deliberately cultivated (he talks about how he never wants to share too many of his worries with robin)#i feel like that could be its own separate post because AAAH#there's so many feelings and so much dramatic irony in sunday and robin's relationship#demonstrated very well by this conversation at the dream's edge#anyway. so i just.#like i definitely didn't doubt that this part of the story would do his character justice#but given my previous feelings on him i just never expected to fall for him like i did#well played hoyo. well played
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#ah i have just realized a big piece of what's freaking me out about the future is the loss of freedom#i've had so much flexibility for years to pick up all kinds of little jobs and responsibilities and activities#and for almost five years i've had a base stipend so it wasn't even stressful scrapping together#but now next year either i will have a job that locks me down to one thing (a very intense teaching load)#or the scrapping together will be stressful and scary trying to figure out how to make it enough to live on for a year#or i will have a normal adult job where i'm stuck in an office year round without the freedom to travel i have now#yikes. ok identifying that is actually super helpful though
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If the first class characters were in the office
#Yes I wasted a lot of time making this#I’m tired and obsessed okay#cherik#Xmfc#x men edit#kinda#okay but here me out#The guy in the black suit? He’s a much more sane and cool version of Michael#Charles and Erik got the Pam and Jim thing going#Which ones which? Uhhh yes#Moira can be the scary blonde lady because Moira strikes me as the type to be scary#Ya know#if she actually got any character development#I mean this in a nice way okay#And then we’ve got raven and hank#Idk where they fit in#And the rest of the first class characters are just people in the office#Shaw is either from a rivaling company or corporate#Nobody is Dwight#He…. Can’t really be replaced#So there’s no dwight#I’m going to go write now#(:#also if anyone knows where to find movie clips of the other actors looking like they’re in an office#Please tell me and I can fix this#James Mcavoy was the only one I could find )):
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big fan of chuuya just not being phased by dazai anymore. the ada judge just how Off The Hinges a plan is by chuuya's reaction, if hes unbothered then so are they. pm members shake in their boots just by hearing dazai's name and chuuya "i shared an apartment with him, hes so embarrassing behind closed doors" nakahara is like " ??? yall fr 🤨?"
#chuuya: dont get me wrong hes a FREAK. absolute Freakaziod of a man; gods least favourite creation; but scary???#i guess you can only see him torture someone to insanity so many times before u get used to it#cmon skk were together through their TEENAGE years!!!! thats the most embarrassing period of a person's lifetime !!#dazais voice cracked while he was needling information out of someone and chuuya lost the shred of fear he had of him then and there#i think the only time chuuya was spooked was the initial meeting in moris office but like yeah. understandable#anyways both of skk are DERANGED and i think thats very important#freaks the both of them 🫶🫶🫶#bsd#skk#chuuya my love#dazai#my hc#personal hc
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SOME ART FOR FINALS BABEYY!!!! Basically I was commuting in a jeep to school and a truck almost hit the jeep and i thought wait this would be a fun isekai series!!!!
So yeah basically, jeep gets hit by truck, isekai transportation to a fantasy pre colonial philippines where they have to find their way back home >B]]]
#ive been so so so busy im still not done w all my projects AUGHH#BUT YA ATLEAST IM DONE WITH THIS!!!#the twins uniform is based off of my uniform before HAHA#but yeah as for the characters we got: senior high twins. Grandma. scary mom and silly son. Overworked office worker. jolibee worker. and#the driver!!!#fun fact that day is when the twins research defense is happening so theyre highkey stressed abt THAT and also being transported to another#world LMAO
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as the new semester begins, I want to share one of the biggest academic lessons that it took me years to learn: talk to your registrar if you’re struggling.
I was five weeks into an econometrics course before I realized I didn’t have the foundation to catch up. Even that late in the semester, they found me a different course that fulfilled the same requirement and ended up being a turning point for me in discovering what I want to study for my masters.
if you feel like you’re out of your depth in a course, talk to them. If you’re not sure if you’re on track for your degree requirements, talk to them. Even if you’re overwhelmed with course selection and want advice on which classes might be a good fit for your interests. You are not annoying them and your problems are not inconsequential—they are what the registrar is for. While they may not be able to solve everything, the position exists for you to seek support, so never feel like you don’t deserve to seek it.
#they’ve solved some really massive problems for me#not all of them of course#and not every person can be an accommodations wizard#but I have gotten so much further than I ever expected by asking#and be patient with yourself if it’s scary too#cause trust me I have also cried in their office#they’re usually very nice#studyblr#study inspo#personal#study motivation#academia#university#uni tips
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Nightwing: The Target #1
#dick grayson is a national fucking treasure and if no one thinks so I’m fucking dead and souls don’t exist#HE BURNED IT ANYWAY#HEHEHDHHDJDJSHS#dick grayson#dc#nightwing#nightwing comics#officer Grayson#kinda#ahhhhh#this is the happy place#competent dick#scary dick
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I saw a frog clock and a peacock vase at a thrift store and I left them behind but I’m still thinking about them… I’m gonna get out of bed early so I can sprint to the store and see if they’re still there
#my ramblings#one of my friends really likes peacocks and wants to start a business with an office (scary)#so I’ll give it to her as an office warming present in 2-5 years#if it’s not there I’ll be sad…
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I'm getting tired of seeing Kaiba fanarts with no Yugi for his bday so I'm coping by drafting fics

#rivalshipping#sorry its incoherent but it made sense to Me#hey im in the dentist's office again its still so scary#but also I still gotta get to work at noon#yes i work on weekends too
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how did u feel about the 2nd Terrifier movie? i saw it on a first date so it wasn’t the best experience… but revisiting it I can enjoy it more. good sfx
So the first one is 1h30m i believe, and I know when I watched it and saw I was 40 minutes in i was like wow its been that long and it feels like not much has happened huh. But then it did what it did and it ended.
For the second one I was like oh its been 40 minutes. Hopefully it starts kicking off like the first one. And then after what felt like an hour only 10 more minutes had passed LOL and the entire rest of the movie felt dis way
I like that this one had more of a semblance of a plot... The clown cafe song is stuck in my head... Sfx is good but hm im not sure how to describe this....im not one of those "omg this is just a legal snuff film u guys are evil for watching this" people nor am i a "ermm if u cant handle this ur a prude and a little baby actually" person but more somewhere in between or outside. I love movie gore, when i was younger I watched Saw SOLELY for the traps, i didnt even know the plot until more recently LMAO
but obviously That One Scene...idk! I dont think it was too much in the "prude" way nor was i clapping and cheering but it did evoke a "ok come on wrap it up" feeling from me...like these faces combined...does dis make sense. Not walking-out-of-the-theater disgust and revulsion OR enjoyment/glee but just mostly straight faced this ⬇️
The first movie has a naked woman being split in half from coochie down so its definitely not the gore itself here that evoked this emotion ykwim
#werewolfclaws#skunk mail#the only adjacent way i can describe it is you know when someone makes an unfunny joke#and when you think its not funny they think its because the joke is problematic and youre a snowflake#but its just that the joke isnt funny#whatever the equivalent of that is for horror movie gore is how i feel#like is it well done? yes. im not walking out of the theater im not throwing up im not pointing and laughing at people who get very#uncomfortable about it but i am making the above faces at like. oh youre ripping her arm#off then tearing her other arm in half and then stabbing her and THEN pouring bleach on her and the salt thing OKAYYY WE GET ITTT#in the same way u roll ur eyes when u hear a corny ass joke like yessss ok fine sure#like its just Silly...not in a ''and thats offensive and bad and evil'' way...i really dk how to word it!#ITS THE SAME WAY I FEEL WITH THAT STUPID LASER COLLAR TRAP IN JIGSAW.#its not like OMG THATS SO GORY AND SCARY 😨😱 LIKE NO ITS JUST A DUMB TRAP#that doesnt mean i hate the movie or franchise and all who enjoy it but i do roll my eyes and jab my thumb at it like get a load of this#long post#i guess i felt the way about That One Scene as i felt about the later scene where art just rips that guys dick off#like. its a clown ripping a guys dick off. its obvious not Serious. but im looking into the camera like im on the office about it#i think that might be the closest comparison...if it were any other movie genre you'd just be like ugh corny jokes!#but here its like oh corny ass gore!#i mean i watched it and im still gonna watch the 3rd#i dont think id ever watch the 2nd one on again for fun bc of how it dragged onnnnn#nor would i ever rec it to someone else like i do with saw#etc etc
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Can you do another wholesome moment with the contract marriage? Maybe Gil having an extra hard day and Thena finds him very exhausted in his office?
Gil startled at the sound of his office door opening. He had dozed off at his desk, like some old retiree. His body flooded with adrenaline, ready to combat whomever was stupid enough to break into his home office.
But it wasn't an enemy, it was his wife.
Of course it was Thena. He had been in here for hours after telling her it would just be one phone call. Usually, he avoided taking work calls when he was at home in the first place. But it had been urgent. And one phone call had become two, then three.
It was dark in the office. The window behind his chair offered some illumination, spilling in from the garden lighting outside. Thena was walking light as a feline, wearing a white nightdress and a light robe billowing behind her.
Gil closed his eyes again. He didn't need the temptation of his wife's beauty right now. He needed a bed time beer and to lie down on the floor and sleep.
Thena moved closer, inspecting if he was awake or asleep. She had been told to stay out of his office; he had to admit he was surprised she was in here.
But if she was breaking a rule here or there, maybe that was a good thing. So long as nothing got her hurt. She was probably bored, spending all her days in the house or waiting for him to be available to go to a market or a library with her.
"Gil?" she whispered, testing the deepness of his sleep.
He remained still atop his desk (just for fun).
"Gil!" she whispered just a little louder. She came closer, enough to put her hand on his arm. She didn't even really shake him, so much as gently push his arm a little.
He kept his smile directed down at the desk. She was so cute sometimes it was hard to keep it to himself.
"Hm," he heard her make an unhappy little grumble. He did feel bad for probably having made her wait for him to come back out all this time. "I could just wake you."
She could. It wasn't like he would get mad at her for it.
A few of his boys had asked him: "Boss, why do you have her?"
He had everything he needed already, and if he wanted women, he didn't need to have a 'wife' of all things. There were other ways to enjoy the company of a woman, to put it politely, without having one live in his own home.
But he liked having someone at home. He liked indulging Thena, and he liked even more when she refused to indulge him in return. Thena kept him feeling lively and challenged, in a way no one else did.
And, despite him telling her she could leave at any time, she hadn't yet.
"But that seems a little cruel," Thena sighed, leaving him be for the moment. She crossed her arms around herself. She had never struck him as the type to talk to herself; she really did need to get out more. Maybe he should get her a car of her own (confidential plates and tinted windows, of course).
Thena rounded the other side of his chair to continue her snooping. His head was tilted a little more in this direction, but if he kept his eyes mostly closed, she would still believe he was asleep.
"What could have possibly occupied you all night?" she huffed, indeed unhappy she had been made to eat dinner and spend her evening alone. "Your food is in the fridge, in any case."
He bit back a smile again. His wife really was a sweet one. She didn't have to save him any food. She could have just left him to order in for himself at this late hour.
Thena tilted her head at him, her long, blonde locks collecting on the top of the desk. She even reached out, just barely touching some of his hair before snapping her hand back to herself. "Handsome thing--unfortunately."
He would have to remember this for another time. He inhaled, just showing some signs of stirring.
Thena nearly jumped, hurrying to take a massive step away from him and pull her robe around herself.
"Thena?" he groaned, rubbing his eyes. "What are you doing in here?"
She cleared her throat faintly as he ruffled his hair. "I was just heading to bed when I noticed you were still in here."
He just nodded.
"Was it-"
He looked at her. He was admittedly surprised she was asking more. She - rightfully - had no interest in what he did for work. Pulling teeth and cutting off limbs was the last, deeply sardonic guess she had offered on the matter.
"Was it bad?" she managed to squeak out, her brows drawn together in concern. "I never imagined it would exhaust you so much you would sleep in here."
He inhaled. Falling asleep was an unforseen and unfortunate outcome. He was getting too old to fall asleep on the job. "It's okay, hon. Just some sudden changes the guys needed help resolving."
That was a polite enough way to put it, he thought.
Still, Thena hovered. She shifted her weight between her feet, visibly debating turning and leaving and staying with him. "But it's sorted now?"
"Uh," he blinked, curious as to what had her so determined to stand around with him. "Yeah."
She continued, too, rooted to the spot as he patted the rumpled sleeves of his suit. Her robe swayed around her legs until, finally, she stepped closer to him again. "Come on."
His eyebrows shot up as she held her hand out to him. He followed, though, because it was too tempting not to. "Isn't that my line, sweetheart?"
She rolled her eyes at him, assuring him she was indeed still Thena.
But she held his hand gently, leading him out of his office and away from his self-made dungeon/empire. She led him out of his office and towards the stairs.
"Uh, Thena?" he inquired, but she continued leading. She had never come anywhere near his room, either. At least as far as he knew.
Not even his room was off-limits to her; only his office was. But he was pretty sure she had wanted so little to do with him upon first arriving that she didn't even know where in the house his room was.
"Sleeping like that will kill your back. I know damn well," she muttered as she padded up the stair ahead of him.
He averted his eyes from the swaying of her hips, focusing on how softly her hair shifted on her shoulders. "Yeah?"
"I had a job in reception for a time," she confessed. This marked something she had told him of her own volition--that he hadn't learned from research or observation. "Call it keeping an eye on my father, for a time."
Now, that was a surprise. "Didn't stick?"
She snorted, a sound he didn't hear her make often. But the change from her usual reserved elegance was funny. It suited her, in a way. "Long hours, little pay, and I should have known my father wasn't capable of professionalism in the work place."
Gil skipped a step so he could walk more alongside her and not behind her. That was enough about her rat bastard of a dad. "Well, what job would you wanna work instead?"
She eyed him in the low lights installed close to the steps and flush with the ceiling. "I thought I didn't have to work."
"You don't," he grinned, echoing the words he had first told her upon the signing of their contract. "You never have to work a day in your life and you'll want for nothing. But I know you're bored."
Now she was the one surprised.
"You're bored here on your own, right?" he shrugged, giving her hand a squeeze as they continued on at a snail's pace. "Probably want something to do in the day?"
"Hm," she agreed, but kept the details of what and where and how to herself. That was okay with him, so long as she told him what she needed from him eventually.
"Name the time and place," he left it at that, bringing her hand up to his lips. Not that she needed him to gift her a job for the fun of it. He was pretty sure she hadn't even liked any of his other gifts.
Except that dress from their shopping trip; he knew that one was in the back of her closet.
His room was upstairs. He had considered having her room next to his, but he hadn't wanted her to feel like he was listening to her through the walls or anything. Not that he could; the walls were reinforced stone. He hadn't built this big, beautiful house just to cheap out on the architecture.
Thena didn't just drop him off at the top of the stairs and say 'see ya', though. She walked right over to his room and opened the door for herself.
Gil grinned, following her inside. "You gonna make sure I get to bed on time and everything?"
She gave him a withering look over her shoulder, leading and leaving him to the foot of his massive king sized bed. "At least change out of that suit."
It was uncomfortable to sleep in. The heavy fabric of the sleeves was still bent and wrinkled, scratching at the insides of his elbows. He shrugged the jacket off, at least. "You don't have to help me."
"No," she walked out of his closet with a clothes hanger. "I don't. You can manage it yourself like a big boy, I'm sure."
He chuckled; man, his wife was cool. He raised an eyebrow as she tossed it at him. She looked around the room, though, shamelessly examining it for her own purposes. "What do you think?"
"It looks like it does in your office." That was true. The house and even Thena's room he'd let an interior designer handle. Everything was fairly modern in a way that he hoped wouldn't look dated in a year and a half. His room and office, though, had old dark wood fixtures and black accents. "A bit grim, don't you think?"
He laughed at that. "You know what I do for work, right?"
"Doesn't mean you have to-"
She paused, and he looked at her for the reason. She didn't seem to have one, her eyes trailing over him as he unbuttoned his shirt. Their eyes met and, charmingly, she rushed to avert her eyes from him. "I thought you didn't need my help for that."
"Sorry, princess," he puffed, continuing to pull his shirt off anyway. "I thought you didn't care if you got treated like a lady."
"I said you didn't have to treat me like a maiden in a tower," she corrected with a certain bite to it. But still, she rotated herself so he could walk into his closet without her eyes on him.
"Relax, sweetheart," he called out from inside, hanging up his suit that had to be ironed anyway. "I'm not gonna strip naked in front of you."
"That's not-!" a half baked protest warbled out of her.
He shook his head to himself as he retrieved some sweatpants and a t-shirt for himself. Really, he didn't need the shirt, but this was for his wife's sake, he snickered.
Thena just barely dashed her eyes over to him as he emerged. She could play it cool as she liked, he could see how flustered she was. "I trust you can manage from here."
"Hey," he reached out before she could scurry away in horror. He pressed his thumb into her palm. "Thanks for pulling me out."
She had no idea what he meant so deeply in that simple phrase. She wasn't in the business he was in; she didn't know that pulling him out was saving him in more ways than one. So she just nodded.
He grinned, leaning forward to kiss her cheek. "Get some sleep."
"Hm." Her eyes did one last sweep of him, unsure of where exactly to land. She reached for the doorknob blindly, missing a few times before she turned and hurried out of his room and downstairs again.
The sweet scent of her shampoo trailed behind her--not the expensive stuff he'd left her in her attached bathroom, some normal stuff she had bought because she already liked and used it before.
Maybe he would get some of that food from the fridge and bring it up here for himself. Or maybe he would sink into bed already. He could dream of Thena feeding it to him. He laughed at himself.
He was cooked--totally and completely done for. That was okay, though. He didn't think it was a bad thing to have a wife who made sure he didn't put out his back and slept in a proper bed.
#Thenamesh Marriage Contract AU#thank you so much for asking for more!!!!!#I really do like this au#I wanna see more of it#Gil and Thena are figuring each other out#Gil likes having a wife#a man is allowed to feel lonely#in his life as a big scary gang boss#and he really figured Thena would have gone to bed without him#in reality#Thena has been debating breaking the rules and going into his office for hours now#she's ready for bed when she's like ugh just see if he's in there#just ask if he's okay#I hope this is wholesome#but listen#Thena knows her husband is a big beefcake#and she's like uh..........hello?#Gil has made a vow though#nothing will happen between them#I do think Thena will get to a point where she's like#I know we're not really married but come on#she gets a little jealous#and is like I know you have needs but I believe we had a contract deal#the tension grows thick#I really do hope you like it thank you for the ask!
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It's always interesting to hear about people's weird/unexpected "alternate life paths". Like, something that you could have done with your life, a job you almost took, a school you almost went to, etc - that was still actually realistic enough that it could have happened, but NOW it seems to not suit your current personality.
Like for example, I currently hate advertising (how manipulative it is, brands trying to be 'relatable', social media amplifying it to an obnoxious extreme, etc.) so much that even seeing a little ad before a youtube video is grating to even witness, but there was a point in time where I was genuinely seriously considering going into marketing/making commercials as a career lol. Or like, I have a relative who was very inclined to be a pastor when they were younger, even though today they're a super strong atheist, etc. etc.
#BECAUSE I knew I really liked filming and editing things and doing set design and costume design (from having done little bits of that#here and there in media classes and my own stuff - i used to be a lot more into making videos than I am now). BUT I was always thinking#that a movie is WAAY to big and long. even a short film. So I was trying to think of ways I could still like#have the fun of scouting locations to film and dressing up actors and etc. etc. without it having to be a Huge Million Dollar Production#on tv show or movie level. SO then I was thinking about like... just doing commercials. Or music videos. Like shorter things where I still#get the fun of the filming and everything but it's less of an intensive long term project.#So there is an alternate version of me (I suppose if i somehow did not end up having physical and mental health issues#as badly somehow.. or like.. randomly came into wealth and was able to pay my way through a nice college despite missing#days constantly being out because I'm sick or something lol) that works in some corporate advertising office coming up with commercials#and directing or filming them or doing the sets for them or something in that general vicinity.#I also was considering being a corporate psychologist. or whatever its called.. oh from google:#''Industrial and organizational (I/O) psychologists study and assess individual group and organization dynamics in the workplace''#I don't think I even knew what the job entailed. I was at the time just thinking like.. the type of person that comes into a business offic#and gives everyone personality assessments or does MBTI or big-5 testing crap for whatever reason that some businesses get that#done for people. Really i just wanted to be in a Corporate Big Office setting yet still do psychology. Because I used to be really fixated#on living in a big city. Like the ideas of everything being walkable. picking up a coffee in the morning. walking to my job in a Big#Skyscraper Building. people watching in a huge hotel lobby for lunch. flying frequently (I love airplanes and airports aesthetically).#living in an apartment with a giant window overlooking the city. etc. etc. BUT that was before i had really BEEN to a city. Then I actually#hung around a city a few times and went places and I was like... AUGh... The Sensory Overwhelm.. cars people lights loudness noise scary#everything happening all at once. etc. etc. (though even when I wanted to live in a city i NEVER strove for the Night Life. when i say I#enjoy city imagery I mean like... in the day time. Many people who like cities talk about The Night Life and post pictures of cities all#lit up at night and clubs and dancing and restaurants. none of that EVER appealed to me. perhaps a sign I am not a real city person. Like#I am NOT standing in a crowded bar full of loud people in the middle of the night lol.. get AWAY from me!!) but I do adore the#architecture of like bright white clean sterile modern spaces like huge airport lobbies or malls or etc. I think thats what reminded me of#city and what I liked about the idea of that life. Like I always LOVED the layout of schools and hospitals and trainstations and public#transport in general. Though even then I knew enough that I would not be a good architect/city planner. so I guess my adoration for those#spaces was merely to be channeled into LIVING there. but then I realized I didn't even really want to do that that much. I mean I still#definitely aim to live NEAR a city. like the little areas outside of it. I would never live in a rural place 4 hours from anything. I liter#ally just COULDNT since I need close access to hospitals sometimes lol. But I used to want to live in the CENTER of citites like high rise#condo. and now I'm like.... eh....... perhaps a smaller quieter walkable space nearby lol.. ANYWAY.. alternate me in my Business Suit eheh
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might actually be getting the nepotism job from my mom’s ex-boss’s boyfriend whoa this is crazy
#i went in to the office and talked to them super informally in SEPTEMBER and then didn’t hear anything so i assumed it wasn’t happening#but then he called me and. it might be happening#which is so scary because it sounds like. difficult! challenging! but it’s a JOB and i need one SO BAD 😁
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I put sol badguy in the mail please wish him a safe trip i am so stressed.
#MAIL IS SCARY !!! havent had any problems yet but its scary. never mailed something this big.#impulse purchased a garage kit then realized i cant do a garage kit myself. so hes going on a little vacation.#smile :)#also mailing other badguys. keychain and some cards. sorry that took so long axl. his huge fucking head didnt fit inthe post office mailbox#the kat goes meow
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