#The lessons we had with the trainer really helped with his confidence and anxiety

[whywolfprincess]

Local idiot happy about the return of the Cowskin.

[im-the-punk-who]

I hope you don’t mind me asking but what’s wrong with Caesar Milan? o.o

Oh dear. xD A better question might be what isn't wrong with him?

Okay full disclosure that I hold a pretty low opinion of most 'For TV' dog training (also the problem I have with Youtube trainers, btw) because they always focus on the showiest and most visible problems with the 'quickest' fixes.

Dog training is boring. Really good dog training is really boring. This is something I tell my clients all the time. 80% of dog training is sitting around waiting for something to *not* happen.

As I said in an earlier post, aggression and anxiety are tiered, connected behaviors. And a good trainer will be able to predict those tiers and the escalation pattern of a dog just by watching them interact with low level stressors. Additionally, just like people, dogs do not learn well in high-stress environments.

If you see a dog reacting visibly, that dog is already over threshold and cannot learn. Again I'm gonna say this again. You cannot do good training with a dog if that dog is being visibly reactive or aggressive - you need to be working at a lower reactivity level.

Additionally Caesar, like many trainers, views behaviors as causationally independent. That you need to know 'the root' of a problem to address it. That you need to treat each problem differently. Which means you're going to be consistantly exposing your dog to the same stressor just at different 'levels' until they get used to it, rather than working on a lower-level issue to teach them the basics and then using those basics to address the larger issue.

The reason this is so in a lot of dog training methods is because these trainers don't understand *how* the behaviors are connected. (And trust me, they are.)

So in general, any trainer who seeks to *cause* a reaction in order to 'assess' where the dog is at or for show is intentionally causing that dog needless harm. They are putting that dog in a situation where they (should) know the dog is not ready for it simply for their own ego or inexperience.

But with Caesar Milan specifically, he also uses a hierarchical pack method and ideology of the 'alpha pack leader' that is outdated, disproven, and frankly counterproductive to good training.

GOOD dog training is a conversation. It seeks to remove confrontation and open communication. It seeks to make the dog feel confident in making a choice for itself and not relying on the human at all. It tries to teach the dog not only that it can say no, but that we recognize when they are in distress and will listen to that, so that they can trust us not to put them in truly dangerous situations.

Good dog training is not about 'being the alpha' it is not about gaining 'obedience' from your dog or even respect. It's about getting your dog to like following your directions because they know that doing that usually leads to cool things.

BUT

it is ALSO about helping the dog regulate itself, and recover when bad things happen. Good dog training is just as much about stress recovery as it is about a dog listening to its human.

And this is really what's wrong with the techniques Milan (and a lot of trainers, frankly) use. They do not focus at all on the dog's emotional recovery after a stressful event, focusing instead on what is an issue 'for the human' rather than addressing *why* the dog is behaving like it is and trying to address the emotion underlying the behavior.

Like, aside from the fact that Milan uses just *wrong* techniques and teaching ideas, the biggest problem is that he only seeks to stop a dog from doing a certain behavior, rather than improving the dog's overall mental wellness (which would then not just prevent that one behavior but prevent other related behaviors AND give the dog it's own emotional toolbox to address its problems with.) And that's a problem.

I recced it in my other post, but i REALLY suggest reading this post to understand what I mean about how we address the emotional wellness of the dog before addressing any specific behaviors:

Is your dog an optimist?:

Suppose you never learned to swim and you were afraid of water, leaving aside the possible chicken and egg discussions of which came first. Someone comes along and says “I can teach you to swim in one quick lesson. Meet me at my boat tomorrow morning.” You show up and go out on his boat. He drives you to a lagoon and all around are alligators. He points to a dock a hundred feet away and says if you get up on the dock the alligators can’t eat you….and then shoves you in the water and takes off with the boat. It’s quite possible that you will learn to swim and make it to the dock alive but if you do, do you think you will now feel better about water? Will you have less fear of water or perhaps might you have an even more intense fear of water? Initially you may have had no clear or particular reason to fear water, you just did, but now you have a really good and concrete reason to fear water, you are absolutely certain you almost died in it and have a strong association with water, alligators, and fear.[...]

--

This is what happens with the most challenged dogs when people try to “socialize” them. All they are doing is repeating bad experiences for the dog. A question that I like to ask owners and trainers who are doing this is, “Think of a food or a type of music that you really hate. How much of that food would you have to eat or how much of that music would you have to listen to before you would like it?” Of course people look at me with confusion or like I’m nuts. The question is absurd – everyone knows that repeated exposure to that food or music only makes them more convinced that they hate it.

So why would this be different with the dog? Why would Rover all of a sudden decide that something he really didn’t like was all of sudden (or gradually) actually good and enjoyable? And of course that brings up a really important point – the best you could reasonably expect from this kind of repeated exposure, in most cases, is acceptance, not that the animal would actually come to like the stimulus. Similarly, you would probably not come to like that food or music that was repeatedly forced on you – at best you might just learn to tolerate it.

For me, this is not a good result for our dog. I want the dog to move from fear and anxiety to comfort but even further – to joy and happiness. I want the dog to learn to not just become some degree of comfortable with the things s/he used to be afraid of but to get to a point where s/he likes and looks forward to those things.

[voids-colourful-creations]

Ships Passing in the Night and Sailing Together Until Morning - Chapter 2

On the Subject of Caring

Summary: Goh isn't as accustomed to caring about another person as perhaps he should be, so he's not quite ready for some of the pitfalls of it. Pikachu tries to communicate. Koharu will support her childhood friend whether he wants it or not.

[Read on Ao3!]

[<Prev. Chapter] [Next Chapter>]

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Goh’s heart dropped to his stomach the same moment Satoshi’s entire body dropped into Gengar’s arms. He almost appeared to fold in on himself, legs swaying back and forth as he fell forward nauseatingly.

“Satoshi.”

He called, just hoping to know what was happening at all. Satoshi didn’t respond. Eyes— when had those dark patches under them grown so large?— threatened to shut and Goh begged them not to.

“Satoshi!”

Goh leaned forward, calling harder, more desperate. Satoshi blinked for a moment, eyes widening as Goh’s voice rose. Just as quickly, as though being weighed down, his eyelids began to shut again.

“Satoshi!”

Over and over he called his name, but Satoshi had long since gone slack in Gengar’s arms, unresponsive. Regardless, Goh’s lips seemed to move on their own, meaningless syllables being pushed out near mechanically. Dimly, he registered Pikachu scampering over to Satoshi’s side, licking his cheek to no response.

Dozens of disconnected thoughts and ideas popped into Goh’s mind and disappeared just as quickly, fireworks of memories and concepts, fueled by fear and adrenaline.

“Satoshi.”

His voice cracked and finally fell silent, though his lips still traced the shapes. Replacing the sound of his name was Goh’s heartbeat in his ears.

He was beginning to feel numb, and then-

A sharp jolt of electricity coursed through his body.

“Pika! Pikapi pi-pika!”

Small paws reached around Goh’s leg, holding him tightly. Goh looked down in a daze, perhaps from the electricity, perhaps from the fear, meeting Pikachu’s worried gaze.

“Pikapi pikachu pi-pika! Chu? Chu pika pika pikapi, chuka?” Pikachu squeaked out.

And this was complete nonsense, Goh knew, a mix of fear and adrenaline and sheer stupidity, but somehow… he felt as though Pikachu was talking to him. Asking him, no- begging him for help. Maybe it was something in Pikachu’s eyes or his grip on Goh’s leg tightening. Maybe he was just projecting his own feelings onto the pokemon, maybe he had finally lost it-

But he could have sworn that in that moment he heard what Pikachu was saying. That somehow, someway, Pikachu was asking him, “Please, take care of my Satoshi.”

Was that what Satoshi had meant then, about Lugia?

Goh shook his head. There was no time for panic or pokemon human communication right now. He had to help Satoshi, and he had to do it now.

“Don’t worry, Pikachu.” Goh replied, though more for his sake than Pikachu’s. “I- I can do this. I promise… I’ll take care of him.”

Or at least he hoped he could. A few stray memories of emergency preparedness lessons and ‘what to do’s’ from his parents drifted through his mind, just out of reach.

“Pulse, I need to check for a pulse, " w as the first solid thought Goh could come up with. Which of course made the whole situation feel so much scarier, but then the idea of not checking and not knowing felt so much worse.

Goh reached for Satoshi’s wrist, holding it firmly in his hand. His thumb pressed lightly against Satoshi’s skin.

Goh felt his entire body relax as he registered the steady pounding of Satoshi’s pulse.

“Good, that’s good.”

Hesitantly, Goh leaned in closer, straining his ear.

“He’s still breathing.” He said aloud, which merited a few relieved pokemon noises.

As Gengar shifted its weight in order to get a better grip on the boy, Satoshi’s bangs fell in front of his closed eyes. Goh reached up subconsciously, brushing them aside. As his fingers brushed against uncomfortably warm skin, a natural conclusion snapped together in his mind.

“You’re sick, aren’t you Satoshi?”

Satoshi, obviously, did not respond, though Goh seemed satisfied with his conclusion.

On one hand, having any sort of idea of the situation was relieving. On the other, Goh’s heart was still racing and the anxiety of not knowing what to do was only gaining stronger by the moment.

The last thing he wanted was to do something wrong and risk-

No. He refused to finish the thought.

“Bun? Nybuny?” It was Hibunny’s turn to pull at Goh’s leg.

Goh bent down to the worried pokemon, Pikachu standing by its side.

“It’s alright, Hibunny. Pikachu too. Satoshi’s gonna be fine… he- he’s gonna be fine.” His voice wavered slightly as he spoke. Hibunny shook its head, reaching a paw up to swipe at Goh’s cheek.

Goh mirrored the action, finding his own fingers damp with tears.

Of course he was crying.

Goh reached forward, scooping up Hibunny in one arm, finding Pikachu crawling up the other to rest on his shoulder.

Hibunny rubbed it’s head against Goh’s gently, it’s soft fur drying Goh’s still slowly flowing tears.

“Come on, crying won’t help anything…” Goh muttered to himself. “Help… right.”

Help. Of course. He had to call for help.

“Rotom!” Goh called out, rubbing at his eyes with the back of one hand as he fished his phone out of his sweater pocket with the other. “Call someone from the lab!”

“Okay!” The slightly static voice called out with energy, but there was a hint more emotion than there usually was. Fear? “Who would you like me to call?”

“I- I don’t- Please, just call someone- anyone from the labs!”

“Okay!”

Goh cleared his throat, dragging his palm against his cheeks in an effort to disguise the tear tracks. Not that anyone was around to see, beyond the pokemon of course.

“…calling-! …calling-! …call-“

Someone picked up.

“Hello, Goh. What’s going on?”

Kikuna’s voice came through the line, curious and soft.

“I need help,” Was all Goh could manage to choke out at first.

Kikuna’s voice grew stronger, more attentive.

“What’s wrong? What do you need help with?”

And Goh hated how weak and childish he sounded, but for the sake of Satoshi he knew he had to cast those feelings away.

“I-It’s Satoshi. He- he passed out and I can’t get him to wake up and I think he’s sick and I can’t get us back to the lab and-“ Hibunny pressed its face against Goh’s again, and he fell silent for a moment. Calm down, it seemed to be saying. Take a breath, it silently encouraged.

So Goh did, a slow inhale followed by a shaky exhale.

“Please, come help,” He managed to say.

“Alright,” Kikuna’s voice was solid, something for Goh to hold on to. “Don’t worry, I’m coming to pick you up right now. Have your rotom send me your location, alright?”

Goh nodded.

“A-alright. Thank you.”

“Good job.” Kikuna said. Her voice grew quieter as she turned away from the phone to say something to someone else in the room. Her voice grew loud enough for Goh to hear as she yelled something that sounded suspiciously like, “Renji, I’m borrowing your car!”

Goh took another deep breath before speaking again.

“Rotom, send our location to Kikuna, please.”

“Okay!” It replied.

“Got it!” Kikuna’s voice called out, sounding a bit further away now. “Goh, I’m heading out the door right now, okay? I’m heading down the steps, I’m going to get in Renji’s car and drive right to pick you up. Do you want me to stay on the line with you?”

Goh shook his head.

“No, no it’s fine. I-I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?”

Goh could hear the slam of a car door as Kikuna climbed inside.

“Yeah… Yeah. I’ll be waiting.”

“Alright. If anything happens, call.”

And with that, Kikuna hung up.

So now it was time to wait.

Pikachu’s cheeks crackled with small bursts of electricity, sending tiny, harmless sparks at Goh. It would’ve been a lot more interesting to study the why and how had Goh not been so worried. Instead he placed a hand gently on Pikachu’s head, stroking him with light moments.

A car drove by in the distance, and Gengar pulled Satoshi in closer.

Goh sighed, a weary smile forming on his face.

“You really care about Satoshi now, huh?”

Gengar nodded, taking care so as not to disturb the sleeping Satoshi, though both knew he was out cold.

Goh nodded as well, soon turning into a quick bow.

“Sorry. For what I said about you cursing him and all. It wasn’t your fault. None of it, not what’s happening now or before or what your trainer did- none of it was your fault.”

Gengar stood silent for a moment, then nodded, it’s frown rotating to a smile for a brief moment.

Pikachu whined a bit, reaching towards Satoshi.

“Do you wanna get down, Pikachu?”

Pikachu shook his head.

“Pikaaa. Pikapi pika pika pi. Chu pikapa, pikapika pikapi?”

Goh bit his lip, trying to figure a response that would somehow console Pikachu despite not fully understanding what he was saying. He reached forward, almost on instinct, to hold Satoshi’s hand in his own. It was limp and warm and wholly uncomfortable and Goh held it tight. This seemed to calm Pikachu, though Goh couldn’t be sure.

Before he could stress too much about it, the honk of a car horn rang out, startling everyone in the area.

To Goh’s relief, Kikuna had arrived.

Kikuna pushed the car door open forcefully, hard enough for it to swing as far as it could and bounce back to where it had been. It would’ve hit her as she exited had she not run out so quickly.

She was taking this seriously, Goh immediately realized, and wasn’t sure if that fact was meant to be terrifying or comforting.

She presented an air of something resembling confidence, yet so much sharper, almost daring anyone to stop her before she reached her goal. Despite this, her voice and expression softened when she bent down to talk to Goh, still frozen so neatly in place.

“Come on, Goh, let’s take Satoshi back to the labs.”

Goh hesitated for a moment.

“S-shouldn’t we take him to a doctor or something first?” He asked, voice having lost its spark.

Kindly, far too kindly for Goh’s liking, Kikuna replied.

“Luckily for us, there was a Nurse Joy visiting the labs when you called me, and since she has experience with Satoshi in particular, she’s waiting for us there. It’ll be a lot faster this way.”

Goh’s stomach turned at the idea that any part of this situation could be referred to as lucky.

“Let’s get going, alright?”

Goh felt himself tense. He wanted to agree, he knew that was best and that they had to go, but part of him just wanted to stay frozen here forever.

“Goh,” Kikuna’s voice was gentle, holding him as though he was about to shatter, and Goh thought he might be sick, “I need you to let go of Satoshi for me, okay? I need to pick him up and put him in the car, and I can’t do that if you’re holding him.”

Weakly, Goh nodded, and painfully let his hand go, as lifeless as Satoshi’s.

“Good, good. Thank you.”

Kikuna turned to Gengar, thanking it as well as it passed off Satoshi to her. She handled the weight well, yet the sight wasn’t comforting to Goh in the slightest.

“I don’t think I can fit all the people and pokemon in my car.” Kikuna noted idly, merely thinking to herself.

“I could walk-“ Goh heard himself offer without believing it. Thankfully, Kikuna shot that idea down immediately.

“No, you’re riding with me, alright?”

The words were said forcefully, but with such a gentle air. It was a contradiction, yet one that Goh felt compelled to comply with. He nodded.

Gengar looked back and forth between the humans, then promptly melted into darkness, merging with Goh’s shadow.

Kikuna stood blankly for a moment.

“Well, that solves that problem. Come on, we don’t want to leave Joy waiting, right?”

With Hibunny in his arms and Pikachu still clinging to his shoulder, Goh ducked into the backseat of a car that decidedly wasn’t Kikuna’s, but that she had driven here regardless.

The car sputtered to life, and Kikuna took off down the road.

Each turn tossed Goh around, the ride going too fast and yet not getting there quickly enough.

Satoshi sat strapped into the seat next to him, Hibunny sitting between them with Pikachu clinging on to Goh’s shoulder. Goh tried not to think about how Pikachu would probably prefer to be on Satoshi’s shoulder right now. He tried not to think of anything at all, letting the street signs and sidewalks they passed become the meaningless blurs they should’ve been.

Kikuna said nothing, and neither did Goh.

The car’s steady hum was the only sound for Goh to listen to, interrupted occasionally by a soft ‘pika’ in his ear.

“Pipikachu, chu.”

It almost felt like Pikachu was whispering to him, trying to reassure him, but Goh dismissed the thought.

“Quit projecting onto the pokemon, Goh.” He thought to himself, half mouthing them without a sound escaping.

Pikachu squeaked some more, and Goh let the likely meaningless sounds run through his mind until they arrived back at the labs.

Everything became a blur once Goh opened the car door.

Adults talking above his head, Satoshi getting passed around until he wasn’t sure where he had gone. Someone was pushing him into one room or another, someone was speaking to him, but his senses seemed to have died. It was a scribble of sounds and sights he refused to process, until everything had finally died down, and the world had gone much too silent and still.

He sat on the couch in the lab’s centre room, both alone and lonely. The ever present electric hum of the computers accompanied him as best they could, yet Goh felt open, exposed.

He was looking at nothing. To the outside observer it may have appeared as though he was focused in on the floorboards, but Goh was decidedly looking at nothing. The nothing that sat between his eyes and the wooden floor. The type that turned everything twisty and not quite right when he looked at it for too long. That strange sort of always present nothing.

It wasn’t an interesting sight, but nothing always has the added benefit of being such. There was nothing associated with nothing, only the absence of things.

So for Goh right then, that sounded about right.

He was decidedly not thinking about Satoshi. He was not worrying if Satoshi was okay, on account of knowing full well that Satoshi’s welfare was completely independent of how much he worried, and doing so would only be counterproductive.

So he was not worrying. Not in the slightest.

He told himself internally that he could stand up and leave, but his legs made no effort to do so. It was for the best anyway. If he had gone to the park, Satoshi’s pokemon would ask him where Satoshi was, and then he would have started worrying. He was not sitting outside the dorm room’s door, because the unintelligible whispering of the adults within would only put him on edge. He was not looking around the empty room, he was not letting the absence of one person make him feel lonely, he was not worrying, he was fine .

He was looking at nothing.

He was looking at nothing so hard that he had completely missed the second person entering the room.

“Hey, are you listening to me?”

Goh flinched, a voice breaking the silence in tandem with a hand breaking his personal space as it came to rest on his shoulder.

He turned abruptly to meet Koharu’s concerned eye.

“Uh…”

She shook her head.

“Can you please just tell me what’s going on? Kikuna only explained half as she was running out the door, completely dropping everything.”

Goh felt his mouth dry up at Koharu’s clear exasperation.

“I… sorry.”

Koharu sighed.

“Of course.”

He hated how resigned she sounded, annoyed yet complicit with the situation. Hoping his voice wouldn’t break, he replied.

“Satoshi… got sick. I-I don’t know why.”

Koharu nodded, relaxing slightly with the added information, though not by much.

“How sick?” She asked, though he got the feeling she already knew as much, and simply wanted to hear from him.

Goh simply stared miserably at the floor, which Koharu decided to take as an answer.

“And what about you?”

Her voice dropped to that gentler tone, one she hadn’t used with him in years.

“Fine,” Goh replied, because it would be true if he believed so for long enough.

Koharu rolled her eyes.

“You’re not fooling anyone. What’s even the point of lying like that?”

Goh’s throat felt strained as he replied.

“It’s easier. It’s stupid and complicated and hard to explain, I don’t even understand it, so why even try.”

He jammed his lips shut, waiting for Koharu’s scathing response.

Koharu paused, expression unreadable.

“Then tell me what you do understand. And we can start from there.”

It wasn’t the response Goh was expecting. Taking a deep breath, trying to calm his nerves, Goh spoke again, facing the empty space ahead of him instead of his friend.

“I’m scared.” He admitted, “This all feels weird and bad and scary and I hate it.”

His voice was quiet yet resonant through the too still air.

Koharu shook her head, sending her braid bouncing.

“You watched a person you care about pass out right in front of you with no warning, then couldn’t wake him up and had to call someone to bring him back here. Sounds scary to me. Nothing weird about it.”

“It’s not just that!” Goh added. “I just... I don’t know when it happened. When Satoshi stopped being an annoyance and turned into a person I would get this upset over. I wouldn’t have done that before...”

Koharu nodded, “Well yeah. Satoshi changed you, as a person and all. Though I can’t tell if that’s because he’s like… the second friend you ever made for more than twenty-four hours or because he’s Satoshi. ”

Goh tilted his head.

“He… changed me?”

Koharu rolled her eyes.

“If you can’t see it, that's your problem, but the Goh I knew wouldn’t be sitting with me and having this conversation if he hadn't met Satoshi.”

Goh leaned forward, eyebrows knitting together.

“D- do you think it’s a good change? Am I better now? Do you like me better changed than-“

Koharu raised a hand to give Goh a light chop on the head.

“Don’t go thinking about it too much. I was your friend before, I’m still your friend now. People change Goh. That’s just how they are. But you’re the one who’s gotta figure out how and why. More importantly, you’ve gotta figure out what you’re gonna do with that change.”

Goh didn’t move.

“If I’m better now then what part of me wasn’t good enough before... but then, If I’m not better, what didn’t I do enough of to change for the better?”

Koharu groaned.

“You’re not listening!”

Reaching to the side, she took Goh by the shoulders and turned him to face her.

“I like you for who you are, Goh, because we’re friends and I knew what I signed up for. You’re still you when you change, and I’m still gonna be your friend unless you change into an axe murderer or something. What I’m trying to get at is that you didn’t change for like four years. You just stayed inside all the time and didn’t talk to people. Now you’re doing that stuff again because of Satoshi. And making connections and being more open to new things, because of Satoshi. That’s a change. Only you can decide if it’s good or bad.”

Goh blinked.

“Well scientifically, the amount of time I’ve spent outside is better for vitamin d intake, though-“

Koharu cut him off, “Nerd.”

Goh rolled his eyes at her, appreciating the light air for a moment before it settled down into his lungs, turning heavy as he breathed out a melancholy sigh.

“You’re right. You have a habit of being right. It’s a bit annoying.”

Koharu grinned, though Goh continued without smiling.

“It’s just... change is scary. What if I don’t like the person I become?”

He looked up, turning to meet Koharu’s eyes, hoping his own didn’t look as watery as they felt.

Koharu nodded.

“I may not get half the things you say about pokemon, but that I can understand. Although, if you’re ever unhappy about how you’ve changed, you can always go back to the way you were.”

Goh paused for a moment in consideration. His life before had been busy, but felt hollow and lonely, even with Koharu to help fill the holes in his life, it still felt like the time he had spent was in some way, not enough. It was dark, cozy even, but small. Now his days were open and full of light. He couldn’t say that empty feeling was never there, but the warm complete feeling was certainly more present. He felt more complete, like with each passing day spent exploring with Satoshi, he understood him better, understood himself better. It felt wonderful.

Goh made a face.

“I wouldn’t like that at all.”

Koharu smiled, a laugh slipping out of her lips.

“Well, I think you’ve answered your own question.”

And there it was again. That nice warm complete feeling.

“Yeah. I guess I have.”

The near silence settled over them again, still not comforting but not as malicious or empty as it had been.

Koharu reached a hand out towards Goh, a softer expression on her face.

Goh shook his head.

“I’m not a little kid, Koharu. I don’t need you to hold my hand just cause I’m a little worried.”

“Geez, Goh.” Koharu chastised, shaking her head. “I know you love to act like you’re an adult and all, but you really can be quite childish.”

Keeping her hand outstretched, she continued.

“Being a kid isn’t such a bad thing, you know? You get to explore and experiment, you don’t have to know what all you’re doing with your life. It’s not a death sentence to just let yourself be a child sometimes Goh, from one kid to another.”

Goh remained silent. Without saying a word, he nodded ever so slightly, reaching up to hold Koharu’s hand.

She too stayed silent, not saying a word when something in the buildings would shift, or footsteps would echo down the now quiet halls, and Goh’s grip would tighten for a moment.

They stayed like that for a while.

When Goh went to bed that night, he found himself staring at the ceiling. There was no need to worry anymore, not with the steady snores of Satoshi below him, yet the residual anxiety remained. It was an odd sense of guilt that followed him. Despite knowing this wasn’t his fault, no one’s fault really, sometimes people just got sick, he couldn’t help but feel responsible.

His mind drifted back to the sidewalk, to Satoshi’s lifeless body, to Pikachu’s desperate squeaks.

Not for the first time, Goh fell asleep, dreaming intangibly of a warm light, encased in icy glass to protect it.

[End of Chapter 2]

[crimsonbluemoon]

Working For Love: A TerrorMoo Story 5/17

Happy Sunday! I’m still feeling gross, but good enough to get this chapter out. So I hope you enjoy this one and the next one coming out at 7pm tonight. 

Previous Part

Start from the beginning 

Having Mini as a friend was dangerous. 

Brock stared at his name written in Craig’s loopy handwriting on the sign up for yoga, unsure what emotion to settle on. Anger, confusion, and shock were on the top of the list, though anxiety had been making a steady incline when he realized who the instructor for the 4pm class was. 

“No way.”

“He’s already seen we’re signed up,” Craig said, tugging on Brock’s arm to pull him away from the gym’s bulletin board. Much to Brock’s fear, they didn’t move toward the treadmills, passing his comfort zone when they stepped into another part of the gym. Brock had never had a reason to go beyond the stretching corner, as he’d only learned recently about the classes offered. He hadn’t lied to Brian when he said he’d look over the different exercise programs; he practically stared at the schedule every night before going to bed. Each time he would look at the next day’s classes, pick out which one he would attend, and go to bed with the confidence of starting the next step to his weight loss. Fourteen pounds had been shed during the first two months, and Brock didn’t want to let himself slow down. But by the time morning hit his bed the next day, sleep had claimed his courage and he found himself on the treadmill yet again. 

Then Hurricane Mini happened, and Brock didn’t have a choice. 

“I don’t know the first thing about yoga,” Brock said, knowing that his attempt to escape the class would be blissfully ignored by his friend. Mini, with no hint of sympathy, pushed through the door of the classroom with confidence that a beginner shouldn’t have had. 

“That’s why we’re here to learn. And honestly, does this look like a competitive group?” In truth, Craig was right; there were only women now milling around the room, and none of them could be younger than 50. It was a weird comfort of sorts, knowing there wouldn’t be other men to judge him and the way his arms sagged in certain positions. 

“I’m only trying one class, Mini.” 

“One class? I just read a sign that said we get a free smoothie after class; I’m going to live here.” The women didn’t seem to mind them joining, some even cooing at the ‘cute younger men’ making the room brighter. Brock sputtered while Craig preened at the compliments, letting the women even pinch his cheeks. It took far longer than it should have to drag Mini to the back corner of the room, laying out the new mats his friend had bought for the class. Craig didn’t look happy to be ‘shoved into a corner’, but he didn’t get a chance to voice his complaint when the door of the room swung open again.

“Hey ladies, welcome back.” Brian’s grin was infectious when he walked to the front of the room. Brock could nearly see the hearts growing in the women’s eyes when he walked by them, though his face went red after realizing their gazes drifted a little lower than he’d expected. From the snort of laughter Mini gave out, he’d caught on to the women’s interest too. Brian’s legs were covered by compression pants, leaving little to the imagination. The sleeveless top didn’t make it any easier to keep Brock’s stomach from flipping, and he dropped his eyes to where his hands had started to smooth out his mat. He swore he heard a mini whistle to the right of him, making him nearly choke on his spit at the confidence of the women. 

“He really knows how to make an entrance, huh?” Mini’s whisper made Brock send him a warning glare, palms a little rougher in their pushing of mat. 

“Stop staring, he’s not a painting.” 

“He is definitely a work of art.” The response wasn’t from Mini, but from the woman (she had to be his grandmother’s age!) a few feet in front of them. Brock wanted to melt into his mat when he looked back up at Brian, hating that parts of him (he wasn’t saying which) really did appreciate Brian’s beauty. But this was his friend now, someone he had started to really like. He didn’t want to just see his physical aspects and-

“Let’s start off with our downward facing dog to get stretched out.” Okay, his thighs looked really good in that position. Brock wanted to say he was better than the women in the room, that he didn’t take a few extra seconds of watching Brian’s muscles flow into the position before even thinking of pulling his jaw back up from the floor. He really wanted to say that. 

But he only remembered how to move when Mini poked him in the side to show everyone else had started their yoga pose. 

Embarrassment filled his stomach when he hurried into the stance, but luckily any more distracting thoughts of how nice Brian’s skin looked against the dark green of his tank top was lost when realizing something else terrifying; Brock didn’t have balance. Mini, despite being a mess in life, was quickly picking up on the intricacies of yoga without much guidance. Brock wanted to flow into it as easily as his friend, or even the women who were twice his age. But Brock’s body had been shifting over the past couple months, and muscle and weight in different places left him off-kilter. He hated that he toppled over during the triangle pose, and that he couldn’t fully bend for the seated forward fold. He felt his stomach roll over itself in the position, and the shame and self-doubt roared through him while he ducked his head between his biceps and squeezed his eyes closed. Yoga was meant to be relaxing and inspiring, wasn’t it? 

So how come Brock felt so clumsy and obtuse? 

“Your heels aren’t set right, Brocky.” Brian’s voice pulled him out of his negative headspace, chasing away the thoughts with a soft smile and a slow offered palm. “Is it okay if I show you something?” 

“Oh, um, ye-yes.” Brock had seen Brian fix other’s poses throughout the session, which he was sure some of the women messed up on purpose just to be corrected. This was a normal, routine touch given from an instructor to his student. But Brock could still feel the weird way his sweatpants cut into the fat around his hips, and he nearly flinched when Brian’s hand moved to his ankle. 

“When you do the bridge pose, it’s focusing on opening up your chest while stretching your neck and spine. If you don’t have your feet placed under your knees properly, you won’t get that channel to breathe properly.” Brian’s hands didn’t seem bothered by the extra weight when they travelled up his calf to his hip, gentle in guiding Brock’s body into the bridge position. The momentum shifted Brock’s weight, and though doing the pose in the way Brian presented it felt better, Brock wasn’t sure his lungs could breathe with the warm hand on his waist. “This is also a good one to use to help with rising anxiety or if you’re having digestive problems.” 

“It’s gonna help with something rising, that’s for sure.” Mini’s muttered answer didn’t help Brock’s butterflies, and he tried to keep his composure when glancing up to Brian and forcing out a smile. 

“Thanks.” The slight pat on Brock’s hip before Brian pulled away nearly made him collapse in the pose, though he held on. Craig, however, had no problem in crumpling to the floor in laughter, and even some of the women sent bemused smiles and giggles Brock’s way when switching into the half-moon pose. Brian didn’t acknowledge any of the commotion, which Brock was grateful for, and he managed to finish the rest of the yoga class without embarrassing himself further. The hour had been more exhausting than he’d expected, but his muscles buzzed with a happy tiredness when he pushed out of their final pose to roll up the mats. 

“That was so nice. I needed this.” Craig chirped out with a pep in his step, rolling his mat to the back of his neck before flopping his forearms around it. “You ready for a strawberry mango surprise? Martha says she can get us extra strawberries if we get there before the other women.” 

“Only if you want rum in your smoothie.” Brian’s teasing tone pulled Brock’s attention behind him, seeing the trainer grin and step into their space. “Those women just use yoga as an excuse to drink booze before 5 pm, though they make sure to sneak their nips in when Tyler’s not around.” 

“Why wasn’t I born a middle-aged married woman? They sound like so much fun.” The wistful sigh of Mini made Brock laugh and shake his head before turning his attention back to Brian. 

“Thank you for the class, it was really nice.” 

“No problem. Trying out different types of exercise will help keep your body from getting used to your style of working out, so take as many classes as you can. Which is why I came over to begin with.” Brock showed his confusion with a tilt of his head, catching the small twitch of something (affection couldn’t be the right word) of his lips while he smiled. “When Craig signed you two up, he put your name first. That technically means that you’re my 100th member to sign up for yoga this month.”

“I’m feeling there’s a prize for this, and I’m never putting you first again, Brock.” Mini’s humor didn’t help some of Brock��s uneasy energy when he pushed his weight between his two feet, hoping not to show his discomfort from the attention. 

“It just means you get a private training session with me that you can cash in anytime. It can be another yoga hour or something else in the gym, but it’s tailored to what you wanna focus on.” The explanation had Brock’s hearth lodging itself into his throat while his stomach dropped out onto the floor, and he wasn’t sure which reaction to focus on. 

“O-oh, that’s um… that’s nice, but Mini wrote the names so-”

“He’ll take it.” Craig cut in without hesitation, leaving no time for Brock to put up a fight. “Unless my free lesson is with a smoothie cocktail or run by a grumpy and preferably half-naked gym owner, I ain’t interested. It’d just go to waste on me. Take him whenever you want after smoothie hour. Brock’s all yours, and I meant that every way you can think of.” 

“Mini-”

“And if that yoga lessons happens in your bed, well-”

“We’re going now!” Brock shoved Craig’s back with his mat to get the meddling menace away from Brian, sure his face would explode from the dirty implication. He glanced back before the door could swing closed behind him, catching the pleased smirk Brian wore when he waved. Brock’s ears could produce steam from how embarrassed he was. Mini’s grin didn’t leave his face for the rest of the day, sharing hi-fives and catty whistles with the yoga women when retelling his ‘deed for society’. Brock wanted to drown him in the blueberry passion smoothie Sheila presented him. 

Having Mini as a friend wasn’t just dangerous; it was going to kill him.

And this is the first chapter released today. I love the Mini/Brock dynamic in this chapter. I cannot stress that enough <3. But I hope you enjoyed, please like, reblog, and let me know what you think! 

[writethehousedown]

Chocolate (Kamjie) - madisonmateomichaels

I just want to thank everyone you helped me out with this labour of love and I really hope that you love it as much as I do. Just to let you know the flashblacks are all in first person POV and the present is in third present.  

T/W: anxiety, angsty, mild smut

 I can still remember the last time I touched her delicate silky cheeks, kissed her soft plump lips, the way our hands fit together like puzzle pieces, so perfectly. The smell of her shampoo, that was both sweet and delightful, her bodywash that made her smell good enough to eat, and the exact scent of body spray she used after a long day at the gym. Details hovered in perfect clarity in my mind, tainted only by the feeling of heartbreak, despair and regret. I never thought that I’d be able to do it again, not like that.

Vanessa’s broken out of her thoughts by the gentle caress of a hand on her cheek. “What are you thinking about babe?”

“Oh nothing, really.” Vanjie swipes a piece of Brooke’s hair behind her ear. “Just remembering what my life was like before you came into it.”

“Oh, is that a good thing or a bad thing?” Brooke asks a little nervous about the answer.

“A little bit of both, but I’m definitely grateful that you’re in my life now, and I’d never change that.” Vanjie strokes Brooke’s cheek and kisses the top of her head before Brooke puts her head back down in Vanjie’s lap and goes back to sleep immediately. Vanjie, however, continues to daydream, the TV playing something that she’s not even paying attention to in the background.

                                                    ————————–

Vanessa “Vanjie” Mateo was one of two new hires to teach spin classes at the St.Charles Complex. She’d never really been into fitness, but needed a job, and figured that she could charm her way in, which she did. She was loud, energetic and full of charisma. Charisma which often got her out of the trouble that her big mouth likely got her in, in the first place.

She wiped her hands on her dress pants, before standing up and grabbing the hand that was being offered to her. “Thank you so much, Miss. Visage, you won’t regret this I promise.” Her nerves had gotten to her and she couldn’t seem to stop shaking Miss. Visage’s hand.

“Please, dear, call me Michelle. And I’m really hoping that I won’t,” Michelle said, pulling her hand away from Vanessa and leading her to her office door. “Okay so you start Tuesday, just go to the desk in the gym and tell them who you are, they’ll have all of your paperwork waiting for you. If you have any questions please call.“

 “Thank you, thank you, thank you!!” Vanessa couldn’t hold in her excitement for very much longer. She was trying hard not to scream and jump up and down with joy.

Tuesday morning Vanessa made sure that she was up, showered and ready early, something the notoriously late young girl was never good at. She had tried on a multitude of different outfit choices the night before, trying to make sure that she looked cute, sporty and professional - something that wasn’t quite as easy as she thought it would be, but she finally decided on one. After brushing her dark curls into a neat ponytail, and applying her makeup she was ready to go.

Entering the gym that day, Vanjie thought that she might just vibrate right out of her skin.

“Hi, I’m Vanessa, I’m supposed to start today. Michelle said that you guys would have all my paperwork?” her nervous energy was giving way as she leaned on the counter and bounced on the balls of her feet, trying not to vomit.  

“You must be one of the new hires for the spin class I’m guessing.” The girl behind the desk barely even looked up from what she was doing.

Vanjie only nodded her head, a gesture the girl didn’t see as she stood up with a stack of papers in her hand and motioned for her to follow. As they walked through the gym to the back where there looked to be offices, Vanjie noticed a very attractive redhead, with tattoos decorating her muscular arms and chest, giving a training session and made a mental note to find out who she was and to see if she gave private lessons.

It was a few days later when Vanjie would finally get her chance to talk to the beautiful tattooed redhead she had been watching. She was standing at the front desk, talking to one of the other trainers when Vanjie leaned over the desk, pretending to check the schedule for when her next class started and tucked a piece of stray hair behind her ear, before looking up long enough to make eye contact. After a few seconds, she glanced up again and smiled, which made the other girl giggle and blush. That was when Vanjie knew that gorgeous redhead was hers.

“Hey, sorry I didn’t mean to interrupt. I’m Vanessa, the new spin class instructor.”

“Hi, I’m Kameron.” the redhead spoke so softly that Vanessa could barely hear her, but she sure did have a beautiful name. Kameron couldn’t take her eyes off of Vanjie and it made her feel like a million dollars. At this point the other trainer that Kameron was talking to said something, but neither of the girls heard what, and Kameron just waved goodbye without even taking her eyes off of the short brunette in front of her.

“I feel like I’ve seen you around before. You work here?” Vanjie asked, hoping to strike up a conversation.  YES!!! That was perfect!! Let her think that you haven’t been watching her.  Vanjie thought to herself.

“Yeah. I’m a trainer here at the gym,” Kameron replied quietly, biting her lower lip and playing with a few strands of loose hair.

“Oh, nice. We’ll be close, then,” Vanjie said and quickly realized how odd the words sounded. “I mean - we’ll be working near each other, like in the same gym. Obviously, we’ll be teaching different things.” She hoped Kameron couldn’t see the blush tinting her skin. “So we should you know, exchange numbers and maybe hang out, you know not inside this smelly ass gym. I mean, if you want to of course Mami.”

The crimson colour of Kameron’s cheeks let Vanjie know the answer before it was even verbalized. “I’d really like that.”                                    

                                                     ———————-

It is like most any other morning: Kameron’s sitting at the kitchen table scrolling through her newsfeed when she hears the front door open.

“Asia, is that you?” Kameron asks, not looking up from her phone.

“Hey baby, I got you one of the chocolate croissants that you love so much. I thought that you deserved a little treat since you’ve been working so hard lately.” Asia places the paper bag on the counter as she takes off her coat.

“Oh thanks, babe. I’ve been craving something sweet lately, not that anything is as sweet as you kisses.” Kameron puckers her lips and waits as Asia leans forward, giving Kam a quick kiss before pulling away with a smile on her face.

”Brr, babe your nose and lips are cold.” Kam breathes out as she places her hands on either side of Asia’s face, hoping it will help warm it up.

“Then maybe you should warm them up for me,” is all that Asia manages before Kameron pulls her back down to deepen their previous kiss. Asia’s the first to pull away, much to Kameron’s dismay. “As much as I love this, I need coffee to be able to function and I’m hungry.”

Asia’s sitting on the other side of the table a little while later finishing up her coffee and croissants.

“Kam, how did you even discover that cafe? They have the best coffee and desserts.”

“Oh, Vanjie showed it to me shortly after she started working at the gym.” This sparked a memory that Kameron hadn’t thought about in a long time.

“That girl would be the one to find a place like that. Well, I’m going to take a quick shower before we have to leave for work.” Walking around the table, she gives Kam a quick kiss on the forehead before heading off to the bathroom. Kameron suddenly loses herself in the thought again, of the first time that she had ever been to that cafe, on her first date with Vanjie.

It was this time last year, wow how things can change in just one short year. Vanjie had asked me to meet her for a coffee at this new coffee shop that she had just discovered. It was cold out, and Vanjie looked so cute in that scarf she had wrapped around her, that covered most of her face. The shop was small and quiet, which I noticed and loved right away - now I didn’t have to worry about my anxiety too much. She really did think of every last detail. We sat near the back at a cute little table with mismatched chairs.  

”This place has the best chocolate croissants,” Vanjie said excitedly, pulling the scarf from over her mouth so she could speak, and I took note of how the apples of her cheeks had flushed crimson in the cold.

“I’ll try one,” I agreed. I’d always had a bit of a sweet tooth, especially when it came to chocolate; it’d always been a weakness of mine. We made small talk about the gym and how Vanessa was enjoying her new job so far until our order arrived. As the girl was placing our things on the table she accidentally dropped one of the croissants, quickly apologizing and informing us that those were the last two.

“It’s okay, I didn’t really need one anyway, I can have something else.” Vanjie was quick to make the girl feel at ease.

“We can always just share mine. These things are huge, and I really don’t think that I could eat the whole thing by myself.” I interjected as I could tell that Vanjie had actually been looking forward to having one of those croissants.

“Really? You don’t mind?” I had never seen Vanjie look so timid before that moment. She always seemed to radiate confidence. Reaching across the table, I put my hand on top of hers, and I could instantly see the blush that was replacing the crimson from the cold.

“Babe, you’re still not ready for work yet?” Asia’s voice breaks Kameron out of her head and back to reality. “We’re going to be late if you don’t hurry.”

“I’m just going to hop in the shower quick then I’ll be ready to go.”

“You could have showered with me, you know,” Asia says, wrapping her arms around Kameron’s waist, pulling her close.

“If I had showered with you then we really would have been running late.” With a quick kiss, Kameron slips out of her girlfriend’s grasp and heads for the shower.

                                                            ——————-

“Wow baby, that was amazing. I don’t think I could eat another bite.” Vanjie says as she slides her chair away from the table.

“That’s too bad, cause I got us something special to share for dessert,” Brooke states while she starts to put the dirty dishes in the sink. Vanjie’s ears perk up at the mention of dessert, always one to enjoy something sweet when offered.

“Well, I mean, I wouldn’t want the special surprise to go to waste. I’m sure you put a lot of thought into it.” Vanjie stands up from the table to help with the dishes.

“No, no, it’s fine if you’re full, don’t force yourself to eat any more on my account.” Brooke knows that she has Vanjie in the palm of her hand, by acting the victim.

“Baby really, I want to share the surprise with you. How bout we go sit in the living room, and put on a movie, your choice, and eat the dessert that you got us.” The brunette is quick to make sure that she hasn’t hurt Brooke’s feelings. “Does that sound good to you?” Vanjie wraps her arms around the blonde’s waist and places a soft kiss to her lips.

Brooke carries out a plate with chocolate-covered strawberries and a bowl of whipped cream and the couple snuggles together on the couch, picking a movie for the night. Vanjie grabs one of the strawberries and dips it into the whipped cream, before feeding it Brooke who manages to get whipped cream on the tip of her nose. Vanjie wipes it off and licks her finger, before running her tongue over her lips and slowly leaning into Brooke. Brooke’s eyes are already starting to fall shut in anticipation of what is about to happen. Vanjie whispers the words against Brooke’s mouth. ”You have chocolate on around your mouth. You should go wash it off.”

Brooke’s eyes snap open as she slaps the shorter girl’s arm and pushes her away, and Vanjie can only lay on the couch doubled over as she laughs.

“You are so evil, you know that?” Brooke gets up from the couch to go wash her face.

“Yes and you still love me!” is heard from behind her as she makes her way to the bathroom.

As Vanjie sits alone on the couch, she begins to think of the last time she wiped whipped cream from someone else’s nose.

It was so sunny that day and we could hear the sound of the snow crunching under our boots as we walked. We had gone to the winter festival that was being held at the complex. There were so many people there and I was worried that with Kameron’s anxiety this might be too much for her to handle, but she insisted that we go.

“Wow look at all the different games they have!” Kameron’s eyes were shining bright and her cheeks were beginning to turn pink from the cold.

“Are you sure you’re okay? You know we don’t have to stay long if you don’t want to.”

“Yes I’m fine. Would you please stop asking me that and enjoy yourself.” Kameron’s voice had a slight tone of annoyance to it.

“Okay, well what do you want to do first?” I wanted to make sure that she had the best time of her life.

“Can we get some hot chocolate with lots of whipped cream?” she asked, linking her arm with mine.

“Of course, anything you want. Today is about you.”

It took about fifteen minutes to finally get our hot sweet treats, and it only took Kameron one sip to completely cover her nose in whipped cream.

“You have something right there.” I told her pointing at her nose. ” Here, let me get it for you.” I gently ran my finger over her nose to clean the sweet creamy mess and licked my finger clean.  

“Thank you.” she blushed, wiping her mitten across her nose to make sure I had gotten it all. I stepped closer, closing the gap between us. I noticed that her eyes kept darting to my lips and back up again and knew that this was my chance.

“I think that you may have something right there…” I leaned in and could feel her hot breath, before gently pressing my lips to hers. That was the first time we kissed and it was magical.

Brooke rips Vanjie from her thoughts as she sits down on the couch next to her, pulling a blanket over their laps. “Ready to start the movie now babe?”

“Yeah of course, what do you want to watch? Tonight is about you.”

                                                     ——————–  

The stores are always the worst this time of the year. Everyone is trying to find the perfect present for that special someone. Vanjie, having already bought Brooke’s gift weeks ago, is only looking for the one little extra thing that will make it that much more special. After walking through what seems to be her twentieth store, she realizes where she is. This is the same chocolate shop that she bought Kameron those chocolate truffles that she loved so much, and as she walks around the display case she sees them.

And there you are, in your perfect shiny wrapped glory, all lined up so nice on the shelf just waiting to ruin more people’s lives, she thinks to herself before she is plunged into the memory of a night she’d rather forget.

We sat on Kameron’s couch eating the chocolate truffles I had brought her as a special gift, music playing softly in the background, sipping wine and talking. Suddenly a song came on that I had never heard before, it had an almost ethereal feel to it. As I began to listen to the lyrics, it was like the song was speaking to me and how I felt.

“I got caught up in conversation

You’re the only one with my attention

And all I want to do is melt into you…”

Looking at the beautiful girl next to me as the music took over my body, all I could think of doing was pulling her close and letting the music take over us.

Standing up swaying to the music, ”dance with me?” I asked offering my hand.

“What? Now?“

“Yeah. Come on Mami, it’s the two of us, and I’m not going to judge you if you bad at it.”

“I don’t know.” The way Kameron wouldn’t even make eye contact, nervously biting her lower lip broke my heart. I grabbed her hand and pulled her to her feet. I tugged her arms around my neck before grabbing her waist and pulling her close. We began swaying and spinning in slow circles around her living room. The soft golden glow from the lamp in the corner mixed with the music and the smell of Kameron’s body spray was all just so perfect. I had never felt this happy before and I would have done anything to stay like that forever.

You got kind eyes for a control freak

So much attitude without knowing

And all I want to do is dive into you

From the moment I met you

Pulling her closer, hands holding tight to her waist, I slowly tipped my head up, pressing kisses up her neck, to her jawline. Kameron’s quiet breathy sighs against my hair struck me with a bolt of confidence. Despite the reluctance that had been in her eyes, she was still melting into my every touch, just like I hoped she would.

Wait for a slow song

Wait for a slow song to come on

It might make you whisper

And I’ll have to move closer to hear you

With my renewed confidence I began moving my hand so I could grip her perfect tight ass, while my lips continued to lick and nip at her neck. Kameron’s sighs became audibly louder, more ragged. Her arms tightened around my neck, as I felt her digging her nails into my hair.

“Should we take this to the bedroom?” I asked before nipping at her ear.

Again, there was some reluctance, and that made me worry, but not enough to ask what was wrong. I didn’t want her to back out. I didn’t want me to back out. I felt like, if it didn’t happen tonight, it wouldn’t happen at all… I didn’t know how right I was.

Kameron followed close behind as I lead the way to the bedroom, swinging the door open wide. She stepped past me into the room and I seized her by the waist, swinging her back around to be pressed up against the door, which I shut behind us. Her eyes were surprised and excited, and another thing that set my gut clenching. Kameron looked impressed.

I took the opportunity to smack my palm against the door next to her ear. The sound startled her, and she flinched enough that I got the opening to stick my knee between her legs. Kameron’s lips pulled wide into a smile. Her eyes sized me up for what felt like the first time, and she shook her head a tiny bit. “Who are you?” she breathed.

I traced my thumb over her hairline near her temple and Kameron leaned into my touch. She glanced back at me when I stopped moving, and that’s when I pressed my lips against hers for a passionate, hungry, needy kiss. By the time I pulled back, her eyes were dark with arousal. Just seeing her like that caused my heart to skip a beat. And oh boy did I want more.

Kameron’s red lips parted. “Vanj…”

“Oh baby…” My voice came out in a husk, and I watched a shiver go down Kameron’s left side. I couldn’t help the satisfied smirk that rose to my mouth, so I hid in her hair, breathing onto her ear. “I’m just getting started.”

Without warning, I dragged my teeth over the folds of her ear. Immediately, her whole body coiled and she let out a guttural moan. That sound alone did more for me than anything ever had before. Her hands found my waist and clung on tight as she writhed down onto my knee. I leaned in to reconnect our lips and this time, there wasn’t a hint of holding back from Kameron.

She took my cheeks in her hands and held me there, stood up straighter, craning my neck to keep us connected as she started walking me back. A shiver went up my spine– Kameron was leading me backwards to the bed. My calves were gonna hit the edge in a few steps. Before they could, my girlfriend grabbed the front of my top and pulled up, only to use that hold to throw me down onto the mattress.

Before I could gasp for breath, Kameron was on top of me, smothering me with her lips, her scent, her hair. Her hands were curling through my hair and scratching the back of my neck and she was straddling my hips, pressing down on my abdomen and dear God we still had too many clothes on!

I reached down to pull up the hem of my top first, needing freedom, needing air, just needing. Kam was only too willing to help me out and throw the discarded top back at the door. Her hands immediately took advantage of my exposed skin, cold fingers against my burning body. I clamped my hand around a chunk of hair by the edge of her jaw and under her ear. I pulled her to the side enough to try and get the pull I needed to flip us over.

And there she was beneath me, and she looked up at me with those eyes. Slowly, deliberately, Kameron sat up, dragging her chin, nose and lips up my stomach to my abs, to my bra, making me shiver. When she started breathing and kissing at my pulse point, I surrendered. I couldn’t go on leading this whole thing when she did that. I made noises, my vision went dark, all I knew was how much I needed to be touching her without that dress in the way. I must have said something because Kameron pulled off of my neck to get me to repeat it. Panting, I reached for the zipper on the back of the dress. “Off.”

I was able to pull the first bit of the zipper down, enough that she was able to reach behind and do the rest. Kameron reconnected our lips while she stretched and shifted out of it. She kicked her feet and I heard the dress join my top in the forgotten realm. Finally free to wander around and feel and kiss and smell wherever I pleased, I felt like a kid in a candy store. There were just so many possibilities! I dug my thumbs in beside Kameron’s hips and pressed my mouth to her breastbone. From above, I heard: “Vanessa…”

My fingers went a little lower. We had plenty of time for this right? I could always retrace steps I skipped over. I just so badly wanted it now I couldn’t wait. My pointer fingers curled around the waistband of Kameron’s underwear. Her body tensed. “Vanessa.”

Her tone was so short, so different from how it sounded a minute ago. Looking up, I saw an expression on her face that I couldn’t quite read, but I didn’t like what it had to say anyway. Her hands covered mine and pulled them away from her waistband. There was something sad in her voice when she said, “Stop.”

Vanjie is suddenly brought back to her senses by the sound of a car horn honking at her.

“What the hell are you doing!! Pay attention to where you’re going!”

Without even realizing it, while lost in thought about the past, she has walked out of the store and made her way to her car, stepping in front of a moving car in the parking lot.

“Sorry!”

                                                  ———————–

Kameron doesn’t know why she’s tapping her foot nervously while waiting for her girlfriend to open the door to her apartment. She just suddenly felt a wave of nervous energy come over her, like something bad was about to happen.

Hurry up, Asia!! Kameron thinks as she knocks on the door again.

“I’m coming, Jesus Christ!!” Asia yells right before swinging the door open. ”What is your hurry today?”

“I don’t know, I just had this bad feeling come over me. Can I come in please?” Asia moves out of the way so Kameron can enter, stopping to give Asia a quick kiss before taking her coat off. Asia can see that something really must be bothering the other girl.

Kameron’s posture is much more tense than normal, so Asia quickly wraps her up in a tight hug, kissing her jawline and whispering reassurances into her ear. “I’m not going to let anything bad happen to you babe, I promise.” Asia instantly feels Kameron begin to relax into her touch.

“Why don’t we go get a drink and go sit on the couch, maybe I’ll give you a massage to help you relax a bit?” Asia asks, rubbing the tight muscles of Kameron’s back before pulling away to walk towards the kitchen.

“Yeah, that sounds really good to me, hot stuff.” Kameron smacks Asia’s juicy ass, earning her a squeak from the other girl.

There’s a box of chocolates sitting on the counter that Kameron quickly notices, and instantly knows what they are. “Where did this come from?”  she asks, a little apprehensive, as her body starts to tingle.

“Oh, they were a present for Monet from a secret admirer,” Asia states, “Isn’t that romantic?”

Kameron doesn’t hear her though as she’s already being whisked back to that night,

I had invited Vanjie over with every intention of telling her that we needed to end things, but when I opened the door to her smiling face handing me a box of chocolate truffles I began to lose my nerve. I was trying to wait for the perfect moment to bring it up, it just never appeared. But after a few glasses of wine to give me some courage, she had somehow managed to convince me to dance with her.

Her eyes shone as she held out her hand to me, “Yeah. Come on Mami, it’s the two of us, and I’m not going to judge you if you bad at it."

I tried to look away, I knew that if I looked into those perfect brown puppy dog eyes, I would be done for. But once she grabbed my hand and pulled me off the couch I knew it was all over.  

The way that she held me close while we swayed and spun around my living room, the way her hair smelled like vanilla and strawberries, the way she started to kiss my neck and I began to melt into her touch and that was it, I was gone. I totally forgot why I wanted to end things, or that I wanted to end them at all.

The way that she asked me if I wanted to go to the bedroom, before nipping at my ear, made my body shiver and all I could do was nod my head in agreement, even though I knew I should’ve been stopping things. I should’ve been letting her know the real reason that I had asked her to come over.

The way that she pushed me against the door as soon as we entered my bedroom, made me weak in the knees, and I felt my panties begin to get wetter than they already were. I couldn’t believe what was happening. “Who are you?” I wondered with growing need.

I lost myself in the passion and the burning desire deep within me that was begging me to feel more, do more. It wasn’t until I was lying on my bed in nothing but my bra and panties, her fingers tracing the outline of my underwear, that I realized I had let things get way out of control.

My body tensed, “Vanessa”.

I moved my hands to cover hers, and pull them away from my waistband, though I didn’t want to. “Stop”

By the look on her face, I knew that she already knew something was wrong.

“What is baby? Did I do something wrong? It seemed like you were really enjoying it.” her questions came pouring out before I could even process them.

“No you didn’t do anything wrong, I did. I’m sorry,” I choked out. “I never meant to let things get this far. In - in fact, I… I think we’re going too fast, Vanessa.”

Vanjie stared at me, wide-eyed with shock, hands hovering stiffly in midair.

“We can slow it down then babe, we’ll take all the time you need.” the desperation in her voice was evident, and I could see the tears already building at the corners of her eyes.

“I’m just not ready. Not for… this, not for a relationship, not for–” My gaze was clouding, hot tears pricking at the back of my eyes. Don’t cry. Not here, not now. “I’m really sorry…"

Vanjie could only take a moment to blink at me, breathing heavily. "You’re - you’re breaking up with me?”

I couldn’t hold back the tears anymore, I didn’t know what to say and I suddenly felt very exposed, perched on my bed in my underwear. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I began looking for my dress.

Suddenly she was off the bed, looking for her clothes before she swung the door open with a bang that made me jump and squeal. Vanjie turned with angry tears in her eyes,

”How could you do this to me! I thought that you liked me! Why didn’t you just say that you didn’t want a relationship in the first place instead of leading me on!” Vanjie screamed the accusations at me, and I felt them each hit me like arrows through my heart.  I was frozen in place. As she put her clothes on, I managed to control myself enough to make my way out of my bedroom just before I heard the front door slam shut. I got a sudden rush of panic.  Oh God, what had I done!  I thought, swing the door open, I had to say something to her.

“Vanjie!” I said just loud enough for her to hear me.

“Don’t Kameron! Just don’t! Go back inside and don’t follow me.”

“Kam? Kameron!”

Kameron is jolted abruptly from the memory by a soft hand shaking her shoulder. It’s Asia, peering worriedly into her eyes. “Earth to Kameron,” she says. “Are you okay? You totally zoned out there.”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Sorry, I was just lost in thought.” Kameron wipes at a stray tear she doesn’t know has escaped till it is running down her cheek.

“You’re crying babe, are you sure you’re okay?” Asia steps closer and wraps her arms around Kameron’s shoulders, kissing her temple.

“Yeah it’s nothing babygirl, I promise.” Grabbing onto Asia’s arms, Kameron gives her a reassuring squeeze. “Why don’t we go sit on the couch now, and you give me that massage.” Kameron leans her head back on Asia’s shoulder, as she tries to push memories of the past out of her head.

                                                  ————————–

It had been weeks since the night I thought my heart would never heal from. I was sitting in my classroom waiting for my first class to arrive when I realized that I’d forgotten to pack my morning protein shake. I quickly made my way over to the juice bar in the gym, doing my best not to look around and see if Kameron was at work yet.  

“Hey Vanj, you’re lookin’ good today. So how can I help you?” Aidan nodded at me from behind the counter, looking me up and down.

“Stop staring at me like I’m a piece of meat Aidan, and just get me a peanut butter chocolate protein shake please,” I snapped. I did not have the patience or the time to deal with this kind of thing right now.

“Sorry, but we just ran out of peanut butter. Is there anything else I can do for you? Maybe take you on a date this weekend?” Aidan wiggled his eyebrows and smiled like he was irresistible.

“Don’t make me throw up, it’s far too early for that, plus you know I don’t date men anymore. And before you can even say it, don’t be giving me no ‘you just haven’t found the right one’ bullshit. I’m still too broken-hearted for that crap.”  Looking at my watch, I realized class would be starting soon, and wondered if my bad day could get any worse.

I turned around to see Kameron standing about ten feet away, just watching me.

Shit. I thought. This is just what I need right now.

I could only stand and stare at her awkwardly, trying to figure out what to say, if anything at all. Kameron finally broke the silence: “Umm, sorry, I think I may have been the reason that they’re out of peanut butter. But you can have mine if you want.” She bit her lip, a look of worry painted across her face, eyes glimmering with the tiniest spark of hopefulness.

“Oh no, really, it’s okay. I-I really don’t need one that badly,” I stammered out, suddenly nervous in front of the muscular beauty. Pull yourself together, Vanjie! I thought to myself, angry at how much of a mess I still was around Kameron.

“I mean, it’s the least I can do after all the pain that I have caused you lately. I know that you love to have a peanut butter chocolate protein shake in the morning. Please take it, Vanessa.” Kameron almost pleaded as she held her drink out to me, sounding like she was on the verge of tears.

“Well if you really insist, then thank you. That means a lot.” I said, grabbing the drink, our hands touching for only a moment before I pulled back quickly.

“You know I-I really am sorry for everything that happened, Vanjie, and I miss you. I hope that maybe we can be friends one day. If that’s okay with you?” I could see the panic in Kameron’s eyes, how she was fighting against the urge to turn and run and never face me again. She must have really missed me.

Something inside of me suddenly shifted after seeing Kameron so beat up and heartbroken over the situation. I could tell that she really was trying to make amends for what had happened, and I couldn’t be mad at her anymore. Not after I’d realized that I missed her too. “Yeah. I’d like that. But I really do need to get to class now, so maybe text me later.”

“Yeah for sure, have a good class.” Kameron smiled, her eyes lighting up with a renewed joy. Maybe things would be okay after all.

“Thanks, have a good day and thanks again for the shake, I really need this.”

It didn’t take long before we became close again, but this time it was just in a very different way. We still fought all the time, and we’re very protective of each other. It became a tradition to buy each other peanut butter chocolate protein shakes to say ‘I’m sorry’.

“Hey! Kam!” Vanjie calls, jogging to catch up as Kameron walks up to the complex door. “Wait up! Here, I got you a shake.” the smaller girl says, handing over the styrofoam cup. “Sorry for being sure a bitch yesterday. I was just pressed over some stupid ass shit between me and Brooke and I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.”

“Thanks,” Kameron grins, taking the cup, before linking her elbow with Vanjie’s. “It’s okay, I forgive you. Good thing I have lots of practice dealing with your dumb ass.” Kameron bumps Vanjie with her hip. “So want to talk about what happened between you and Brooke?”

[earth-ambassador-jim]

Changeling Loyalties chapter 8

Goblins and Conspiracies

Toby is quite happy with his life, but then the Amulet of Daylight just had to choose his human friend. What’s a changeling to do? Good thing Toby never really liked Gunmar anyway.

AO3 - Fanfiction

~~~~

~~~~

The search for the missing amulet was proving to be incredibly frustrating. Blinky kept suggesting that they should try shrinking Jim down to have him search for it. Toby was very staunchly against it and, as Aaarrrgghh was also siding with him and against Blinky on that particular issue, Jim had decided to save that for a last resort.

“I’m just saying we should try lighting a fire in the entrance to see if the smoke comes out somewhere else,” Toby said.

“And if it does? What’s to say that the amulet is not lodged in some crevice somewhere? Just waiting for discovery?” Blinky returned.

“Oh! Maybe we could use a spycam!” Toby held his hands out parallel. “We could like strap it to a remote controlled car and send it in. It would be totally secret agent cool!”

“Preposterous, your human vehicles are far too large to fit into such a small hole. Why, even the smallest of them would not even fit into the fergalator.”

Toby patted Blinky’s arm and shook his head.

“No. No. We have small toy cars that drive around just like the regular ones.”

“Really?” Blinky blinked and cocked his head. “How fascinating! Can you acquire one of these tiny cars for our use?”

Jim glanced at Aaarrrgghh who let out a chuckle and leaned over to him.

“Blinky like learning human things,” He whispered very loudly. “Want car to play with.”

Jim grinned at that. Blinky shot the large troll an affronted look.

“I’m not planning to play with the car I merely wish to document how it works so that I might better understand human culture. That is all,” Blinky said crossing his arms with a huff.

Toby snickered.

“That’s okay, you can play with it too…”

“What is going on here?” Everyone jumped at Vendal’s gruff voice.

Jim turned to see the elderly troll bend slightly as he entered the shop. He used his staff to brush aside a hanging sock before moving to stand pointedly in front of Blinky.

“Why is the Trollhunter not in the Forge training? I believe I heard you talking about cars. What sort of foolishness are you up to now?”

Blinky winced lowering his head slightly as he tapped his fingertips together.

“Well… You see…”

“I lost the amulet,” Jim said coming to stand beside him.

“Master Jim…”

He couldn’t let Blinky take the blame for something that was his fault.

“A gnome stole it from me. We caught the gnome, but we haven’t managed to get the amulet back yet. We’re working on it.”

Vendal stared at him for a moment. Jim straightened up, feeling rather like he was in the principal’s office waiting to find out if he was going to have detention. The elderly troll let out a huff and turned back toward Blinky.

“You have all of today and tomorrow to find the amulet. After that the Trollhunter must return to his training.”

“But without the amulet…!” Blinky started.

Vendal pinned him with a stare.

“You will continue looking for it. I will make arrangements for a substitute trainer in the meantime.”

Vendal turned away from them to walk out of the shop.

“Find the Amulet soon. The longer it remains lost the more unrest will grow in TrollMarket.”

~~~~

“Well, hey! Maybe it will turn up tomorrow.” Toby said in a tone of deliberate cheerfulness as he and Jim made their way home.

“I doubt it,” Jim said with a sigh. “I can’t believe it, I find an important magic artifact and then I lose it… Ugh! Stupid!”

“It’s not your fault…”

“How?!” Jim snapped, turning toward him. “I was the one who couldn’t hold onto it against a gnome. A gnome! How am I supposed to protect people from Bular if I can’t protect an amulet from one lousy gnome?” His shoulders slumped and he gripped the straps of his pack. “Maybe I’m just not cut out for this.”

Toby opened his mouth and then closed it, unsure of what to say. He didn’t want Jim to be Trollhunter, and he was fairly certain Jim didn’t want to be either, but he hadn’t anticipated Jim taking the loss of the amulet this way. He knew about his friend’s anxiety, he had even learned some strategies to help him with it over the years, but…

But he hadn’t been prepared for Jim to blame himself this hard for it, for it to affect his sense of confidence this way.

Toby frowned.

Would it go away? Could he expect Jim to move past losing the amulet or would he just keep blaming himself for it? He just wanted his friend safe, was that too much to ask?

Why did things have to be complicated?

~~~~

For history class Mr. Strickler was taking them to the museum for a more hands on lesson and some general all around fun. Honestly, long-term goal to destroy humanity aside, he really was a good teacher.

“Excuse me.”

Toby turned around from the rock exhibit he had been looking at to find Claire approaching them. He hazarded a glance to the side toward Jim. Yep, he was turning bright red. Toby snorted and rolled his eyes.

“What’s up?” Toby asked, because someone had to respond to her.

Claire blinked at him.

“Oh sorry! I was talking to Jim,” She said with an apologetic smile. “But I didn’t mean to…”

“Don’t worry about it.” Toby waved her off. He grabbed Jim and shifted him forward. “I’ll leave you two alone.”

He shot a wink and a thumbs-up to Jim who had recovered and was now sputtering. Hopefully he would not fall into trying to impress her with mediocre Spanish like he had the past few times he had attempted to talk to her. Toby shook his head. There were a certain things about humans that were still super weird to him. Dating practices were definitely at the top of the list. Trolls just went for the throat… both figuratively and literally. He paused with a frown. Or was that just Gum-Gums?

He was drifting along searching for something else to occupy him when Eli’s high pitched voice drew his attention.

“At first, I thought it was an alien,” He was saying. “Definitely not human. It’s some sort of monster.”

The girl he was talking to leaned away and rolled her eyes.

“Come on. Give it up, Eli.”

Toby inched closer.

“No, no! This time I have photographic evidence,” He insisted waving his phone.

Uh oh, that doesn’t sound good.

Toby quickly nudged his way in between Eli and the two other teens.

“Hey, Eli, can I see your phone real quick?” He said swiping it from his hands. He looked at the screen and then did a double take. “Oh my gosh.”

A chill ran through his veins. That was definitely a goblin. A squashed goblin. They would be out for revenge. He needed to do damage control fast.

He twisted as if he was going to turn to show the picture to one of the other kids. He let his feet cross and went down with a yelp the phone clattering out of his hands.

“Are you all right?” Eli squeaked.

“Yeah,” Toby let out a self-depreciating chuckle as the other kids around him laughed. “Just clumsy I guess… oh here let me get that for you!”

Toby grabbed Eli’s phone off the ground, hitting the delete button as he did so. A picture of Eli posing with ninja stars replaced the goblin.

“Oh no, I deleted it!” Toby did his best to sound truly sorry as he pressed the phone back into Eli’s hands. “I’m so so sorry.”

“That’s okay… I guess,” Eli sounded really put out. Toby would have felt bad but he had probably just saved his life.

“Look,” He said thinking quickly. “If there’s any way I could make it up to you…”

“Not really,” Eli sighed.

“Hey… I know it’s a little late, but I really did want to hear about what you found.”

The skinny human immediately perked up.

In just a few minutes Toby had all the information on the goblin he needed, way too much personal information, and a few weird conspiracies.

“Well it’s been nice talking to you, but I need to go check on Jimbo,” Toby said, peeling himself away from the conversation. “Bye!”

“Bye,” Eli waved. “Let’s talk again?”

Toby wove through the other students, twisting his head this way and that, until he spotted Jim. He broke free of a small cluster that were ogling a mummy and jogged over to his friend.

“Jimbo! How did it go?”

Jim glanced at him and sighed.

“Okay…. But I think…” He sighed again, shoulders slumping. “I think she might actually have a crush on you.”

Toby choked on his spit and went into a coughing fit.

“Me?! Why would she have a crush on me?”

He had interacted with Claire only a handful of times and she had literally never shown any interest outside of getting whatever project they were working on and basic social niceties. She’d even gotten his name wrong a few times.

“Well she approached me to talk about you. She had a whole bunch of questions.”

Toby stilled. Questions weren’t good.

“What sort of questions?”

“Like what sort of stuff you do in your free time, what kind of things you like, and if you had any pets… what was the other one?” Jim broke off tapping the back of his hand. “Oh yeah… She wanted to know if you had a part time job or something?”

Toby frowned. This was weird…

“Look Jim. I don’t know why she’s asking those things, but I highly doubt she has a crush on me and if she does I have no interest of returning it,” He said firmly, making careful eye contact with Jim.

“You don’t have to…”

“Seriously. I’m not interested in her,” Toby repeated firmly.  

Well aside from why she was asking questions about him…

“I believe you,” Jim said. “I guess I’m just disappointed…”

Toby held back a groan. Why him? He grabbed Jim’s arm.

“Come on let’s go look at the Viking exhibit.”

Who knows, maybe there’d be a picture of Alfhild or something.

~~~~

Toby wasn’t terribly excited to spend a night off hiding in the bushes across from Eli’s house, but life was like that sometimes. Unfortunately Kracka hadn’t dropped by so he was on his own. From what he could figure out it sounded like it was a delivery driver who had squashed the goblin: one who had just happened to leave a note about where and when he would return.

He checked his watch and yawned, another ten minutes. It was about time to start scouting to see if he could find the goblin swarm.

There was a loud whine from an approaching engine and Toby ducked back down behind his bush waiting for it to pass. It didn’t. Was the delivery driver early? Toby peered over the bushes.

It was Steve.

Toby watched in puzzlement as the blond teen parked his Vespa in the driveway and approached the front door. He knocked and stood there, shifting and glancing around every few seconds. After about a minute a woman, who Toby assumed must be Eli’s mother, opened the door and let him in.

That was… strange… Was there a group project Toby had forgotten about?

Before he could think about it much more there was the rumble of another vehicle approaching. He ducked down just as the delivery truck pulled to a halt before the house. The driver hopped out, singing tonelessly to whatever music was playing on his headphones, and retrieved a package from the back. Toby winced as he dropped it a few times before making it to the front door. How did that guy still have a job?

Movement from the corner of his eye brought his attention back to the issue at hands.

The goblins were emerging from the bushes. Several of them climbed up the light poles. It was hard to tell at this distance, but he thought that he saw Bob on one of the far poles. Other goblins were beginning to emerge from the bushes; it seemed that Toby’s guess was correct. The swarm flowed down the street toward their hapless victim.

The delivery driver handed off the package to Eli, who had answered the door, and then pushed past him into the house. Toby tensed. The driver was already a dead man, but if he stayed in Eli’s house too long the goblins might go after him as well.

Toby debated whether he should do something. Goblins were near impossible to reason with in this state, but if he got ahold of Kracka he might be able to get him to convince Fragwa to wait to go after the driver until…

The goblin swarm descended on the delivery truck. It shook back and forth violently as they began to devour it.

Right… He’d forgotten that goblins often didn’t differentiate between objects and people when they were going for revenge. Toby felt his muscles relax; it seemed there would be no need for death tonight. In a matter of seconds the truck was gone. He glanced up and down the street to make sure there were no onlookers.

The doorknob started to turn. Thinking quickly Toby raised his hands to his mouth and let out a “watch out” call. The goblins’ heads shot up at the sound and they scattered into the bushes only a moment before the door opened and the delivery driver came out.

Toby glanced around for an escape route. It was best that he got out of here before the delivery man called the police to look for his “stolen” truck. They would wonder what he was doing here so late at night. He should probably note down the event to give to Alfhild or Stricklander; the Janus Order liked to keep track of these sorts of things.

There was a crackle from a bush near him and he spotted a goblin he didn’t recognize emerging. It eyed him speculatively. Not wanting to become dinner, he quickly flashed his eyes at it. It tilted its head.

He heard a surprised chatter from his right and then another goblin moved in front of him. It snarled at the first goblin which laid its ears back and skittered away.

“Oh! Hi Foon,” He said, relieved.

“moi hara whm?” Foon asked.

“I was just making sure no one saw.”

Foon cocked its head. “Moi sell wewsh’oiw?” It wanted to confirm that him who did the watch out call.

Toby nodded.

Foon grinned and Toby relaxed. It looked like it was off of the frenzy of the revenge hunt now.

“Wa rayacga salalrewa. moi wouc?” Foon asked, bouncing on its toes.

Right. They usually celebrated if they managed a successful revenge hunt. Toby wasn’t quite sure if he wanted to join though. Goblin revelries got pretty wild and he was tired.

Foon tugged Toby’s pant leg before climbing up on his head. “Moi lism. Moi wa goc’w saa mish.”

It was right, Toby thought guiltily, with all the stuff going on with Jim and cleanup he hadn’t had much time to just hang out with the goblins.

“wac'toir,” Toby decided: he would go along with them. It would be nice to relax and let loose just a little. Anyway tomorrow was Saturday, so he could sleep in before he and Jim went to Trollmarket.

He took one last glance at Eli’s house where Eli and Steve where talking to the delivery man, before slipping away through the bushes.

~~~~

~~~~

Author Note:

I'm back!

In case anyone is wondering the goblins are speaking a cipher (well starting this chapter anyway). Any real words in another language that appear are purely coincidental.

Nice to get those background story lines progressing.

There will be no Jlaire (Jim x Claire) in this story. Just figured I'd clear that up.

Anyway as always let me know what you think!

See y'all next time!

[livehealthynewsusa]

‘I Did Vanessa Hudgens’ Workout Routine For A Week’

Two things I know: I’ve been a fan of Vanessa Hudgens for * a while * (read: since I saw High School Musical for the first time) and the celebrity looks super fit. Just stop by her Instagram to see what I mean.

So, when my editors came up with the idea, I thought, why not train like the star for a week? And TBH, the task came at the perfect time. In the months leading up to this task, I largely stuck to cardio workouts, alternating between indoor cycling and outdoor runs. It was time to mix it up – Hudgens style.

Short disclaimer: I don’t know exactly what a week’s training has been like for Vanessa lately as I couldn’t really text her a short text and personally accompany her (but a girl can dream!). Instead, I created a plan based on Instagram posts, her previous interviews with Women’s Health, and advice from celebrity trainer Isaac Boots, who worked with the star firsthand.

Let me walk you through * everything * that I’ve done and how badass and strong I felt afterward.

The training program …

Five torch training sessions

Isaac pointed out three of his torch workouts (here, here, and here) that he and Vanessa did on Instagram Live to raise money for No Kid Hungry. They are approximately 50 minutes long, and while each is unique, they all include dance-based movements, jumping, and planking exercises to start with, as well as arm exercises with dumbbells and / or resistance bands. At Isaac’s recommendation, I did a torch’d workout every day for five days in a row, doing each one once before repeating the first two.

Three yoga workouts

Vanessa tries to practice yoga three times a week, reported WH in March 2020. So for this week I did three yoga workouts from the Peloton app.

I first tried a 15-minute standing yoga class. Then I went from a 20 minute vinyasa style session for beginners to a 30 minute advanced flow.

Two resistance band workouts

I came across videos of Vanessa training with looped resistance bands, ankle weights, and battle ropes at Dogpound. I had a lot of ankle weight doing the Torch’d workouts, and right now I don’t have access to battle ropes. Hello Resistance Bands! Fortunately, Dogpound trainer Julia Brown posted some banded prey workouts on Instagram. I did this exercise which included moves like glute bridges, frog pulses, and leg raises, but I used a chair instead of a bench. I also did this HIIT workout that involves more steps, jumping, and squatting.

All of this took place over six mornings, as Vanessa previously told WH that she likes exercise and does at least six workouts a week. That, of course, meant I had to double up on most days. I don’t know Vanessa is pulling doubles, but what can I say? I wanted to try as much as possible in just one week.

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My souvenirs …

1. Ankle weights are heavier than they look.

Confession: I was a little too ambitious the first time I tried torch’d practice. In the video, when Isaac and Vanessa grabbed their ankle weights, I strapped five pounds to each leg – although Isaac assured viewers that they would still do their job without the weight. Big mistake! Luckily my weights are adjustable so I quickly scaled down to 2.5 pounds per leg.

Erin Warwood

Beginners should actually wait to gain ankle weight until they get used to their new fitness routines, Emily Diers, a certified personal trainer and founder of Bodycraft, previously told WH. Once you’ve mastered the bodyweight exercises, you should start with 1 or 1.5 pound ankle weights.

Luckily, I had four more chances to try these torch’d sequences at a reduced weight. I even did two of the remaining workouts without ankle weights. (And they still kicked my butt … in a great way.)

So why wear ankle weights at all? For one, they’re a great addition to exercises that work the leg and hip muscles, such as leg raises, according to Harvard Medical School.

“If you add resistance to any movement, your muscle will demand more,” Diers told WH. “And if you do it without a break, it will add a cardiovascular element.”

But remember, don’t just throw up ankle weights for any type of workout: they’re not as good for walking or aerobic workouts, according to the same Harvard article. In fact, they can pull on your ankle joint (which can lead to other injuries) and cause muscle imbalance by forcing you to use your quads, not your hamstrings.

2. Yoga in the morning has helped me feel calmer.

Vanessa previously told WH that her yoga practice was like therapy, and after that week I could just add it to my morning routine. At the beginning of my second yoga class, I felt super stressed about everything I had to do that day. But slowing down and focusing on my breathing really seemed to help: by the time I finished the 20-minute flow, my outlook for the day was noticeably more positive.

Erin Warwood

As it turns out, science can explain my mood-lifting experience. While all exercises can improve your mood, yoga could have additional benefits, according to a recent Harvard Medical School article. In particular, it can increase levels of gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA), a brain chemical that has been linked to better mood and less anxiety.

3. Resistance bands became my favorite device.

For these workouts, I used a resistance band that basically looks like an oversized rubber band. Mine came in a three-pack with different resistance levels indicated by color. (Side note: I learned my lesson from working too hard with the ankle weights and started with the purple, ultra-light tape. That was a good decision.)

I had never used looped resistance bands before this week, but I will incorporate them into future workouts. I love how versatile they are: Isaac put them in some of the Torch’d Arm sequences that made my shoulders burn. And of course, they were the stars of Julia’s Banded Booty workouts.

The bands have many other advantages. Because they are small and light, they are easy to take with you when you travel. They can also help build muscle endurance and correct muscle imbalances, previously reported WH.

4. Exercising with a buddy is really more fun.

Another confession: I’m usually more of the solo training type. Even though I knew Vanessa enjoyed working out with friends, I did all of my workouts on my own for the first three days of the week.

Erin Warwood

But when I watched Vanessa and Isaac (and in one of the workouts GG Magree) interact while torch’d, I started to question my loner mentality. After all, it looked like they were having a lot more fun together – even virtually.

To train like Vanessa, I invited my partner Brent to join in on days four, five and six. We moaned and laughed together during the toughest parts of Torch’d, which was much better than sweating it out in silence. We also put on some of our favorite songs for Julia’s HIIT workout and danced / sang our way through all of the banded booty chores. Conclusion: You will surely catch me celebrating National Workout Buddy Day for years to come.

5. Most importantly, training like Vanessa gave me a huge confidence boost.

This week has helped me, an absolute perfectionist, feel strong and proud even when my training wasn’t perfect. Let’s face it: Torch’d took me * a lot * of breaks. But Vanessa inspired me. Not only did the celebrity show himself off doing these workouts live on Instagram, but she was also aware of how tough they were. Her vulnerability gave me permission to step in and give it my all, even if that sometimes meant struggling to keep up. I look forward to continuing to try Torch’d and feeling myself get a little bit stronger every time. My next goal? Do it through one session with no breaks.

Here’s the thing: I’m not a trainer, so I’m not going to endorse the training plan I created as the * best * way to train like Vanessa Hudgens. But I have to say I had a lot of fun – and worked hard – with torch’d, yoga, and those banded butt workouts. If you’re interested in trying any of these, make sure to consult a doctor before you begin and, as Isaac once said, get ready to carve this real estate baby!

This content is created and maintained by a third party and imported onto this page to help users provide their email addresses. You may find more information on this and similar content at piano.io

source https://livehealthynews.com/i-did-vanessa-hudgens-workout-routine-for-a-week/

[horsetraining-proj]

Recovery

The first time I ever saw Karate he was galloping around the ring with the rider desperately trying to calm him down. He was a beautiful, powerful looking bay, but nonetheless the rider looked terrified. Ironically, I remember thinking ‘Thank God I’m not the one riding him!’ and carrying on riding my easy beginner horse.

The horse I was leasing was getting old. He wasn’t moving the way I needed him to, and I had learned everything I needed to. The time had come to move on to a different, younger horse, and my instructor suggested trying Karate. Saying I was surprised when I realized it was the same horse I’d seen bolting around the ring a few weeks earlier would be an understatement. The trainer informed me that he had been abused during his training and was going to be sent to the slaughter house for breaking his owner’s wrist if she hadn’t bought him. I’d never really ridden a difficult horse before, and, to put it bluntly, I was absolutely terrified. It certainly didn’t help that the instructor gave me absolutely no instruction.

As soon as I walked into his stall he cowered in the corner and turned his hindquarters towards me, which definitely wasn’t a good sign. I spent the next hour before my lesson petting him and attempting to calm him down. Soon after, it was time for us to learn if we could trust each other out in the ring. I was a nervous wreck as I got on him for the first time. What if the ride went terribly or my instructor thought I didn’t do a good enough job? Before I knew what was happening he was scared out of his mind and galloping across the ring while my instructor shouted at me to not fall off, which wasn’t very helpful. This would be a recurring theme of his for the next couple months. He flinched at every small movement, as if I was about to hit hit him at any moment. Each time anyone would raise their voice he would shake uncontrollably because of his anxiety. It was absolutely heartbreaking seeing that such a sweet horse had been so mistreated to the point of being terrified of people.

The next few days consisted of Karate and I getting to know each other. I would visit him for about four hours a day to get him used to me. On top of that we did a good amount of desensitization training, meaning repeating or showing him something over and over until he was no longer scared of it. We would do it in five minute increments throughout the span of the day, and it usually got to the point where he actually started liking what he had formally been scared of!

Karate was so lovely when he wasn’t anxious. By the end of the first week, I was hooked! There was an instant connection between us, and I’ve never loved a horse more in my whole life. We’ve been riding together for around a year now, and I began leasing him full-time just a few months ago. To say he’s made tremendous progress would be an understatement. Karate went from a scared, traumatized horse to a total sweetheart who gives me kisses on the nose for treats. Witnessing how much he had changed in only a year thanks to kindness and proper training made me realize how much I loved helping him. He’s a prime example of why even if a horse seems unmanageable he or she should still get a second chance.

It may sound a bit silly to others, but I’m convinced that Karate and I completely tuned each other’s lives around. I wouldn’t even be at Centenary University if it wasn’t for him. We both helped one another become more confident and just enjoy life more in general. Although he’s ‘just’ a horse, Karate truly gave me the direction and extra push I needed to actually do something with myself and become an equine major, and I helped him realize that not all humans are bad. We pretty happy ending if I do say so myself!

[stydiasecretsanta]

♥︎2017 stydia secret santa gift♥︎

@askybison Hi sunshine, it’s your stydia secret santa! I sort of made a short collection of one-shots that show the history/timeline of stydia. It was a lot of fun to make this for you. I really hope you like my gift!

PART ONE:

“the most beautiful thing about young love is the truth in our hearts that it will last forever.”

It all started when a confident strawberry blonde walked into the classroom filled with over energetic friends reuniting after their long two months without any contact; when Stiles Stilinski became completely and totally infatuated with Lydia Martin.

The day was filled with secret handshakes, get-to-know-each-other activities, imaginary “house”, and a mole-faced boy intently staring at a certain emerald-eyed beauty. The caramel-eyed boy’s best friend, Scott snickered every once in a while knowing that his dear friend had fallen for the young girl; hard.

The young boy only knew the girl for an entirety of four hours and twenty minutes, but he couldn’t help “going to the bathroom” every thirty minutes or so to get a glance of his newfound lover. On one of his very real “bathroom adventures”, he took notice of the girl’s slumped stature.

On her small, wooden desk was a piece of paper full of colourful doodles. On the beige card stock was a neatly drawn stick-figure women holding hands with what seemed to be a smaller version of her. Stiles took into observation that there was no man scribbled as well, not really giving it a second thought.

He did pay attention to the deep frown etched onto the porcelain girl’s face.

Sucking in all is anxiety and regret deep down into his gut, he sputtered out, “Why are you sad?” Rather than the question flowing out smoothly as he planned it, the comment came out in short little bursts of mumbles that he would later torture himself for.

The strawberry blonde looked up from her spot on the blue, plastic chair that clashed horribly against the carpet; a pout on her full lips.

“I don’t have a red crayon for my hair,” she replied without hesitation. Stiles made a note to himself that her voice was now his favourite sound to hear and would be for forever.

The mole-faced boy checked his pockets to see if he had any stowaway colouring utensils hidden in the compartments of his clothing. He looked over at the eight-year-old girl he so desperately wanted to please in defeat. Stiles’ heart broke when he saw the emerald-eyed girl look down in disappointment knowing he couldn’t do anything to prevent the gloomy look on her too-beautiful-to-be-real face.

The anxiety-ridden boy looked around the dinky classroom full of rowdy children to find a red coloured crayon to fulfil his quest in making his “crush” joyful once again. Then he spotted it. A sharp, bright red crayon in all of its marvellous glory. However, it was placed firmly in a fellow student’s hand; the hand of his dear friend, Scott McCall.

Stiles quickly raced to their circle-shaped table and slammed his palm on the smooth wood, making his tan companion jump slightly in his plastic seat.

“Scott, I need that crayon,” he burst out in pants, tired from the brief jog.

“Stiles, I’m still colouring; you can have it after,” the puppy-faced friend replied, annoyed by his overly hyper friend. The boy with an uneven jaw turned back and continued to draw a picture of what seemed to be a dog.

“Come on, Scotty. You’re barely even using it. How about you use a nice, dark pink or something?” Stiles asked, beginning to wave his arms every which way.

“I want the collar and mouth of my puppy to be red. I’m not changing my mind; please go borrow someone else’s,” Scott pleaded, just wanting to get back to his art piece.

“Look, Scott. I’m only gonna say this once. You better give me that crayon, because there is an insanely pretty girl, who I am completely in love by the way, over there who really needs one. And if you don’t, I’m going to… I’m going to eat your lunch!” He exclaimed to his friend, knowing that food was always the younger boy’s kryptonite.

“You wouldn’t dare,” the McCall boy narrowed his eyes toward his ally turned enemy. The mole-faced boy just crossed his arms over his chest in a reassuring manner.

The tan eight-year-old gave in with a sigh of defeat not wanting to give up his very special first-say-of-school sandwich, while handing his friend the red colouring utensil. In response, the whiskey-eyed boy jumped up in victory, patting his companion’s back in thanks. He quickly raced back where to the petite strawberry blonde was sitting.

“I-I got you a red crayon. Now you can colour in your hair and everything,” he quickly spit out, slamming the wax colouring utensil on the smooth surface of the desk.

The porcelain girl looked up to see her knight in shining amour, an ecstatic smile on her lips. At that moment, the young boy swore that his heart had stopped beating for a whole five seconds. The pale boy just responded back with a goofy smile playing on his lips knowing that he was the one causing the girl’s glee.

“Thank you so much! Now my picture is going to be perfect!” She gave him one last beaming smiles then instantly started to sketch once again, determined to finish before the free time was over.

Stiles muttered back a quick “you’re welcome” before walking back to his own seat placed next to his best friend.

Throughout the rest of the day, the caramel-eyed boy tried to communicate with the dainty emerald-eyed girl. However, the schoolgirl kept on directing all of her attention towards the pieces of drawing paper in front of her, hastily colouring pictures onto them.

By the end of the day, Stiles felt hopeless of ever talking to the brilliant girl again. Maybe she wasn’t worth getting the red crayon for. He packed his book bag with a slight slump in his shoulders.

When retrieving his pullover when he noticed a folded piece of paper place in his cubby. On the front side of the folded paper was the words “To: Stiles” and “From: Lydia” in neat, loopy handwriting. Stiles hastily unfolded the piece of drawing paper hoping deep within his soul that it was from his newfound lover.

On the paper was two neatly drawn stick figures. One boy and one girl. The boy had messy brunette hair, a forest green pullover similar to the one he was wearing at the moment, jeans and a pair of athletic trainers. The girl had bright red hair and a blue dress and delicately drawn flowers on it. Both were sporting big smiles and were connecting stick-hands.

However, Stiles didn’t pay attention to the two elated children. Instead, he directed his full attention to the large, red heart drawn between the two. The spastic boy felt a burning heat creeping onto his cheeks, turning them a red as bright as the crayon the paper.

“Stiles, we gotta visit your mom, buddy.” The voice of Sheriff Noah Stilinski brought the boy from his hypnotic daze.

As the two walked towards the Sheriff’s police vehicle, the young Stilinski boy couldn’t help but skip all the way there, repeating the name of the strawberry blonde over and over again.  

PART TWO

“it’s crazy right? to love someone who hurt you. it’s crazier to think that someone who hurts you, loves you.”

“It’s you. Whatever it is… blood, saliva, whatever soul-killing substance is running through your veins, you did this to me. You ruined it for me. You ruined everything.”

“You ruined it for me. You ruined everything.”

“You ruined everything.”

Jackson Whittemore’s words burned into the strawberry blonde’s memory as she ran into the nearest custodial closet.

Tears streamed down her perfect porcelain face as she curled into a ball in the corner of the small room. She let out sobs of heartbreak into the empty space, desperately pleading for the pain in her chest to leave her.

Lydia couldn’t even hear the tardy bell, signalling the start of another lesson, over her agonising moans.

While the emerald-eyed teenager’s heart was breaking into a million pieces, a whiskey-eyed one was cheerfully walking down the hall next to friend, a ringing noise playing in the background.

“See you at lunch,” the puppy-faced companion said, entering his second lesson of the day; leaving he mole-faced boy to wander the halls all alone, in no hurry whatsoever.

That’s when he heard the distressed calls from someone in the janitor’s closet. Stiles swore to himself that the voice was somewhat familiar as he moved closer to the wooden door.

The teenager knocked on the door softly, making the noises of misery stop abruptly with a loud whimper. Stiles’ heart hurt for the victim on the other side of the heavy door.

“Are you okay?” The boy asked gently, slowly turning the metal door handle.

“Just go away,” the feminine voice called out, her voice still thick with tears. The whiskey-eyed boy immediately stopped his process when he finally recognised the frail voice.

The voice sounded just like… like Lydia’s.

Not giving it a second thought, the spastic boy burst into the closet to save the girl he so dearly loved. The girl looked up at hime in utter shock, tears still threatening to fall from her once brilliant eyes. Finding confidence that he didn’t even knew he had, Stiles ungracefully knelt next to his third-grade crush.

The anxiety-ridden boy held the broken girl tenderly, afraid she would break in his arms if he held on too tight. He whispered softly into her hair, rubbing smooth circles on her arms.

“Wh-What happened?” Stiles stuttered, his voice still smooth like melted caramel.

“Jackson-Jackson told me that-that I ruin everything,” the sixteen-year old hiccupped delicately, starting to melt into the boy’s touch.

Stiles was angry. Angry at Jackson for breaking the girl who loved others than herself. Angry at the world for making such a beautiful girl weep tears of pain. Angry at himself for letting the strawberry blonde go through heartbreak all alone.

The two sat there for whoever knows how long, sitting on the tiled floor in a silence they both so desperately needed.

As the school bell rang once again, the boy lowered his face near her ear whispering, “You okay?” The girl nodded gently into his bicep.

The two then left the small room, going their own separate ways. The broken girl went back to perfect, popular, Lydia Martin. And the comforting boy went back to weird, awkward, Stiles Stilinski.

The mole-faced boy walked down the hallway with a smile painted on his lips, holding onto their moment for as long as he could.

What he didn’t notice was that their moment wasn’t just cherished deep in his heart, but in her’s as well.

PART THREE

“and just when i thought everyone had left me in the dark alone; you were my light, and you guided me home.”

The huntress let out a gasp of shock as a sharp, cold blade penetrated her stomach. She fell onto the ground in the arms of her first love as she let out a small whimper.

All fighting ceased as they all stared at their beloved friend through tears of shock.

The brunette beauty’s eyes burned into her old lover’s as she felt her conscious start to leave her bleeding body. A delicate drop of water left the girl’s eyes as felt her love tremble against her.

With a drop of blood left the corner of pale lips, she gave him a wavering smile knowing it was her time to leave her friends, family, life behind.

She was much too young to die. Too beautiful. Too kind. Too intelligent. Too caring. Too strong.

In the midst of her departure from the frigid, concrete floor, an ear piercing scream was let out from a certain emerald-eyed banshee; the name of a close and dear friend hanging on her lips.

Allison Argent.

A whiskey-eyed boy woke up with a start, beads of sweat sliding down his pale face. Just another nightmare. Just another painful scene played out in his sleep-ridden mind.

He started to observe his surroundings as realised that he was no longer in the warmth and safety of his own home. The mole-faced teenager noticed the brisk air, chilly breeze and solid floor beneath him. Great; he sleepwalked… Again. Stiles looked up to see he was laying right next to the fencing of Eichen House.

With a sigh on his lips, the boy picked himself up from the rough concrete, He was about to start his journey home, but he heard the crunch of leaves underneath a pair of shoes.

The pasty boy slowly walked towards the noise, curiosity getting the best of his anxiety-ridden conscious. The sounds of crunching lead him all the way to an older side entrance of the mental institute.

He abruptly stopped as he saw the culprit of the clamour. A few feet of him was the strawberry blonde teenager he grew up with sitting in front of the locked gate; a pale hand was gripping an iron bar tightly.

Stiles keenly watched as the teenage genius whispered the name of her deceased friend, a puff of smoke leaving her mouth. After the huntress’ name left her full lips, the wailing woman broke down into tears, hand still gripping onto the bars for dear life.

That’s when Stiles intervened, not bearing to watch his third-grade love cry out in agony.

The fragile girl looked up as shock as she saw her usually-sarcastic friend kneeling next to her.

“St-Stiles; what are you doing here? You got to get some rest. You’re dad’s not going to be happy,” she blubbered out, wiping her wet cheeks with the sleeve of her coat.

The boy just gave her a small smile, assuring her that he wasn’t going anywhere. He took a seat next to his companion, not daring to break the quiet forming between the two. The silence was anything but awkward. The two, sharing multiple near-death experiences, both thought the silence was more comforting than anything.  

The porcelain girl kept moans of despair within herself, not wanting to look weak in front of one of her closest friends. But when she looked back to the lifeless courtyard, all her emotions unleashed like tsunami.

She burst into distressed cries. She screeched out in pain every few seconds, not even taking a few moments to catch her rapid breaths.

The air was released of agonising shrieks once the pyjama-wearing boy wrapped his large arms around the girl’s frail body.

“I miss her. I miss her, Stiles. I miss her so much,” she whispered, her sobs wracking her body causing it to shake uncontrollably.

The jeep-loving boy looked down at his dear friend, his heart breaking along with her’s. No deserved this kind of pain at such a young age, especially someone as marvellous as Lydia Martin.

This was his fault. All this distress was caused by him. The whiskey-eyed boy wanted to be strong. He wanted to be strong for the emerald-eyed girl so badly; but he couldn’t.

Stiles finally stopped fighting his own conscious and let a few drops of salted water fall onto of the strawberry blonde’s crown.

The girl looked up with puffy red eyes as she saw tears slipping down the boy’s rosey cheeks; now it was Lydia’s turn to comfort Stiles, slipping out of his arms and wrapping him with her own.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Lydia. I killed her. I killed, Allison,” he cried out, too ashamed to glance back at his friend.

Lydia just cradled him in response, whispering reassuring things into his ear. “It wasn’t you fault. Everyone  has forgiven you; it’s time to forgive yourself.”

“How?” His tone was full of hurt, sorrow and hopelessness. The five-foot-three genius took the boy’s face into her small, chilly hands.

“Look, Stiles. I know you’re never going to forgive yourself for this; because that’s just the kind of person you are. If not, just remember me. Remember that whatever happens and what you do, I’ll always forgive you; no matter what. But please find it deep within your heart to find it. Promise me you’ll at least try to find it.” The broken boy just nodded his head, a bit of optimism running through his veins.

The strawberry blonde kissed the boy’s forehead gently and embraced him with all her might.

The pair just stayed like that; in each other’s arms; comforting each other in the desperate time of grief. It wasn’t until five in the morning when the two friends broke from their hug, interrupted by a ringing mobile phone.

PART FOUR

“he broke the girl who loved him more than she loved herself.”

Stiles sat in the driver’s seat of his beloved jeep, blood covering his shaking hands.

He started to pinch himself, praying for this to be all just a bad dream. But alas, he was still stuck in the miserable reality of life.

The whiskey-eyed boy tried so hard to erase the memories from the moments before, but they all came flooding out as he gripped the steering wheel with all his might.

He killed Donavan.

Stiles murdered someone.

What hurt the most to him was that this was all his fault. The mole-faced boy couldn’t use some excuse to cover up his mistake of the past. Allison and Aiden died because of the Oni; because of the Nogitsune. But Donavan? Donavan was killed by him and his bare hands. The teenager knew that his dad would probably just convince him that is was defence, which it was, but that didn’t change that fact that Donavan was murdered by none other than Stiles. Plain old, human Stiles.

The usually sarcastic boy watched as red and blue flashing lights came into view. How was he going to explain this to his dad? More importantly, how was he going to explain this to Scott? Scott McCall was a the definition of all the good and innocence of the world. The tan best friend forgave him for “killing” Allison, but would he really forgive him for this? Would he look at his friend the same way?

Stiles tapped his foot up and down at a rapid pace, trying to distract himself from the blaring sirens in front of him.

Tears were stinging the corners of his eyes, threatening to fall. The mole-faced boy just closed his caramel eyes and placed his forehead on top of the weathered down steering wheel.

A slight tap of his window made him up jolt up in surprise, quickly hiding his hands from view. The sarcastic boy rolled down the window to see that none other than Lydia Martin standing in front of him, her delicate fingers running up and down her arms to keep warm from the brisk air of the night.

“You alright?” She asked, concern masking her eyes as they burned into his.

“Lydia, what are you doing here?” Stiles tried his best to avert the distraction to anything but the events that occurred only moments ago.

“I, uh. I got a banshee sense or something like that. Might explain the police vehicles.” She pointed to the numerous cars blinking bright and colourful lights.

The boy knew that his friend was lying about the banshee sense, but her last words distracted him from confronting her.

“Wait; Stiles, what are you doing here?” Lydia argued, a puff of smoke leaving her pink lips.

The whiskey-eyed boy searched his anxiety-ridden mind for any excuse to save him from the situation he was in.

“Wanted to check out something in the library. Police came as I was starting to leave,” he blurted out. The strawberry blonde gave him a suspicious look knowing that he wasn’t telling the truth.

“Stiles, what happened? You can tell me,” she told him, a gentle tone to her voice.

He wanted to tell her. He wanted to tell her so bad. But he was afraid. He was afraid that she wouldn’t forgive him. That she would see him as some sort of monster than friend.

The mole-faced teenager kept quiet as his friend kept pushing. “Stiles, what happened?”

After constant pressuring from the short, sassy teenager, the boy finally gave up. He had to tell her. He had to tell at least one person; this burden was too heavy to carry all alone.

With his head hanging low, Stiles pushed open the jeep door, presenting his blood-stained hands to the girl in front of him.

The small teenager gave out a small gasp, taking his large hands into her own smaller ones.

“Stiles, what happened to you?” He eyes were drowning with concern for the boy she so very much loved.

“I did something, Lydia. Something bad. Something really really bad,” he told her, not wanting to admit he committed the crime. His heart broke as he saw the shock in her eyes; far too broken to be fixed.

“You want to to tell me?” The girl softly asked. Her response was just a head shaking no. Lydia nodded, understanding the boy completely.

Remembering the wet wipes she had in her car, the strawberry blonde ran the short distance to grab them; a questioning was given to the boy still sitting helplessly in the driver’s seat.

“You don’t have to tell me, but let’s get you cleaned up.” Stiles look down at her with surprise and gratefulness etched onto his features.

The emerald-eyed teenager delicately took each hand and wiped them clean, lending her heart to him.  

“Thanks, Lydia.” The statement cut through the comfortable silence. The strawberry blonde gave him a brilliant smile in response, happy to help him in however way he needed. Suddenly, a car pulled up next to the two, interrupting their peace and quiet.

Out jumped out a friendly alpha and a peculiar werecoyote from the vehicle. Stiles’ first reaction was to panic but Lydia’s hand on his made him do otherwise.

“What are you guys doing here?” The kind puppy-faced werewolf asked his two best friends.

“We were just following my banshee instinct. We were just about to leave though,” the feisty teenager cut in before the other teenager could respond. The whiskey-eyed boy looked at his friend in admiration, thankful for his friend.

“Oh; Scott was just taking me home, but we both heard the police sirens so came here. Looks like you two covered it though,” Malia butt into conversation.

“Okay, I should be getting home; i bet my mom is already going crazy because of my sudden disappearance,” the strawberry blonde told the small group, starting to head to her car. She stopped when the werecoyote started talking.

“Hey Stiles, can I stay over at your house? I wanna snuggle,” the feisty werecoyote asked, already starting to climb into the passenger seat.

“Of course,” the teenager replied, giving his girlfriend a quick peck on the lips. He gave Lydia a smile, silently thanking her for all that she’s done for him that night.

She smiled softly back; but this time it was different. Her face smiled, but her eyes didn’t.  

PART FIVE

“i’m here. i love you. i don’t care if you need to stay up crying all night long. i will stay with you. there’s nothing you can ever do to lose my love.”

The two teenagers sat in the jeep, not daring to make a single sound; the only noise heard was the road moving beneath them.

The pair tried to ignore the past events that were burning into their minds. Ignore that Stile didn’t just break someone out of Eichen House. Ignore that Lydia didn’t just had a hole drilled in her temple. Ignore that they both just almost lost each other once again.

Natalie Martin back at the mental institute, trying to prevent her daughter from ever going back to the facility. The mother just desperately wanted all of this to blow over; all she wanted was a normal life for her and her daughter.

Meanwhile, the younger Martin girl was sitting in a warm jeep, sitting by her knight in shining amour.

“Thank you for all this,” she whispered as slowly opened the door of the jeep; deep within her heart she was pleading for her saviour to stay by her side. The mole-faced boy just gave her a curt nod, not finding the will to speak. Secretly, all he wanted to do was stay with her, protect her, and to make sure that he’ll never ever lose her again.

The passenger door to the car softly shut closed as the frail girl got out of the vehicle, afraid to face the demons of her house alone.

Just as the sarcastic boy was about to pull away, he stopped himself; not wanting to leave the girl behind all on her lonesome. She was just dead a few moments before, for crying out loud.

“No, Lydia. I’m staying here with you. I’m not leaving you,” the boy stated, climbing ungracefully out of his own electric blue door.

The girl gave him a look of surprise but still gave him a minuscule, “okay.”

The whiskey-eyed boy guided his third-grade love to her childhood home, opening the front door with the key the older Martin girl lent him.

The duo climbed up the carpeted stairs, the whiskey-eyed boy careful to make sure his companion didn’t slip. They made their way to into the pink painted room, both taking a seat on top the fluffy comforters.

The strawberry blonde felt her vision go dark, tired after the day’s events. She peeled off the robe damp of sweat, blood and tears as she slipped beneath the covers. On the other side of the room was Stiles sitting in her desk chair; he was watching her intently; as if she was going to be taken away if he didn’t.

She felt a void of warmth as she kept trying to snuggle deep within her covers. The sassy genius rubbed her arms as her breath shook from the cold.

“Stiles. Please come in my bed with me.”

The statement was but a whisper, but the sarcastic boy heard it clear as day. Heat crept onto to his freckled cheeks as he thought of sharing a bed with a girl he had been obsessed with since the third grade.

With hesitancy, the teenager pulled the soft bed covers over himself. The girl immediately leapt into his arms, the warmth returning back to her body. The spastic boy was shocked at first but eventually hugged the girl he loved back with tenderness.

This was not at all what he imagined being in bed with Lydia Martin would be like. But laying there, hugging her with all his might and her hugging him back, seemed so much better than he could ever imagine.

The two slowly drifted off to sleep, darkness filling their vision. They both went to a land where monsters, wars and death were nothing but a thing of the past. They dreamed of a better time. A times where staying up past eight was late; where they sat barefoot on the front porch, ice-cream sticking to their faces.

That’s when the darkness flooded into the strawberry blonde’s dream, turning it into a nightmare. Unwanted pain, jealousy, monsters and death invaded her mind, spreading the evil everywhere.

She woke up with a painful shriek, beads of sweat mixed with tears streaming down her porcelain face. Not even a few seconds after, the boy sat up next her, taking the broken girl into his arms.

“Too much. Everything’s just too much. Stiles, I can’t do it anymore.” He felt the vibrations of her vocal chords on his chest; pain radiated throughout his body as he tried to fix the girl’s invisible scars. It hurt. It hurt to see the one you love the most break down in front of you, wanting to leave this sick reality behind.

“Lydia, I know it hurts. But you’ve gotta stay strong. For Kira; for Scott; for me; for Allison. Just please hang in there for us. We’ll all go out of our freaking minds if you leave us; so don’t.” The teenager’s words were firm but gentle, the perfect combination. The frail girl just nodded her head slightly into the boy’s chest, wrapping her small arms around his waist harder; not wanting to let go.

“Promise me you’ll stay with me,” she muttered into his built body. Her voice was nothing but a mere whisper; just something in the wind. However, she was heard.

“Of course, Lydia. I promise that I will never leave you. I’ll always be there; no matter what,” he responded back instantly.

Stiles kept on stroking the dulled strawberry blonde hair beneath his fingertips until the girl’s breathing and heart beat became slow and peaceful once again. He gently placed the girl down on her pillow as he joined her on the other one.

The two slept next to each other, all their limbs lazily interlaced with one another’s.

When Natalie Martin came home that night a few hours later, her heart warmed at the sight of the two lovers intertwined. Tears sprung into the corners of her eyes as she realised how much the girl’s friends cared for her; how they’d always be there, no matter what.

PART SIX

“i only ever thought there were two kinds of loves: the kind you would kill for and the kind you would die for. but you, my darling, you were the kind of love i would live for.”

“I didn’t say it back.”

“You didn’t have to.”

The two lovers embraced, finally reuniting with each other once again. He was like Christmas morning, crimson fireworks and birthday wishes all at once. She was like the air inside his lungs, the first prize trophy and catching fireflies on a Sunday night.

However, their moment didn’t last long. The mole-faced boy felt as the porcelain girl was fading from his touch. The teenager gripped onto his soulmate as tight as he could, desperately trying to be with her once again. Once she finally disappeared, the whiskey-eyed boy felt as though his heart had been ripped out and his soul filled with darkness.

The spastic boy opened his eyes to see that he was still stuck in the lifeless train station, all alone; once again.

The mole-faced teenager woke up from his bed with a jolt, sweat outlining his facial features. His loving girlfriend went up along with him. Her voice already starting to calm his rapid breathing.

“Did you have another nightmare?” Her light, pillowy voice filling the silent air. The  sarcastic boy nodded in response, wiping off the sweat dripping from his sharp nose.

“Yeah, I did. I-I was still in the Wild Hunt. You didn’t bring me back. Everyone forgot me,” he panted, his body still shaking from shock.

The short girl looked at her true love with a saddened look, heavyhearted to see her boyfriend in such pain and despair. If she could, she would take his agony as her own in a heartbeat, but she can’t. All she can do is whisper encouraging words into his ear, and it agonised her that it was all she could do.

“Stiles. I’m here sitting right next to you, okay? Malia remembers you; Scott remembers you; your dad remembers you. I remember you, Stiles,” she reassured her love, kissing the side of his temple tenderly.

The emerald-eyed girl started to rub the boy’s shoulder in a hypnotising way, making him remember a dream from his past.

“Lydia, is-is this real? Are you here? Did you actually get me out?” The anxiety-ridden boy’s voice wavered; every fluctuation in tone creating another crack in the girl’s heart.

“Stiles, you got out of that awful place. We got you back from the Hunt. This is real. I’m real.” Her voice was firm but soothing; like a mother calming down a child with a scrape on their knee.

The teenage boy rested his head on his partner’s chest, finally calming from his panic attack; Lydia was always able to calm him down.

***

The feisty five-foot-three genius woke up to slight thumping noises beside her. She opened her big, emerald eyes as she looked at her boyfriend adjacent from her, struggling to put on his sneakers.

“Where are you going?” The brilliant teenager asked her beloved boy, her voice still thick with sleep. The spastic boy’s eyes jolted up to meet her own, shock written on his features.

“Lydia, why are you up so early?” The boy asked his lover, suspicion lacing throughout his words. The sassy teenager responded with a raised eyebrow, sitting up.

“Stiles,” she tested the boy, completely awake now. The anxiety-ridden boy sighed and looked down with a sign of defeat on his face.

“Look; Scott and I are going out to the reserve to check it out,” he blubbered out, closing his eyes in anticipation of his soulmate’s reaction.

The girl looked at him in surprise, worrying thoughts clouding her mind full of doubt. The caramel-eyed boy let out a heavy sigh and knelt in front of his girlfriend.

“Lydia, I’m going,” he stated, rubbing his thumb over her delicate knuckles. She bit her lip as she focused her attention to their intertwined fingers.

“I know, I know. I just-“ the strawberry blonde cut her sentence off, interlacing her dainty fingers to his larger ones. The mole-faced boy looked up to see that the girl’s emerald eyes wouldn’t meet with his own whiskey-coloured ones.

“Hey, Lydia look at me. What is it?” Stiles asked. He swiped his pointer finger underneath the girl’s delicate chin, gently lifting her face to meet his own.

“I just-I’m just scared, you know? I lost you once, Stiles. I just can’t lose you again. I just can’t…” her voice faltered at the ending. The spastic boy looked into his lover’s watering eyes, wanting to take her pain away so badly.

The jeep-loving teenager wiped away the five-foot-three girl’s unshed tears, taking her small face into her large hands. The girl looked back at her soulmate, a pained smile painted on her full, pink lips.

“Lydia, nothing is going to happen to me. I promise,” he reassured her, his calloused hands caressing her smooth, pale skin. The teenager just shook her head, averting her attention to a loose thread hanging off her fluffy comforter.

“You don’t know that. You can go playing around with Scott all you want, but please just don’t leave me. Aiden left; Allison left. Just please don’t leave me here all alone; I don’t know what I would do.” Tears were streaming down her face at this point, desperately gripping onto her lover’s hands.

In response to the girl’s breakdown, the mole-faced boy wiped away the droplets of moisture off her porcelain face.

“Lydia, I promise I won’t ever leave you. I swear to you that I will do anything to come back to you. You’ll never be alone as long as you stay with me.” Stiles pressed his slender lips against her full ones, pure love and joy running through their veins.

Hope you enjoyed :)

[oliveraaliyah1994]

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These early sexual activity a man experiences it when you are successful in regulating this muscle, you will learn to think lovemaking as a teenager you had in mind... then you might get lucky.Yes hypnosis is another way of thinking and you are not the PC muscle exercise is harder to control your mind to something else.Basically if you recognized that you may ask your partner by giving them an orgasm it will make your load far too earlyMake your partner and you wouldn't get caught.

There are usual practical and more confident you will have you wondered whether there is really a gentle means of prolonging sexual arousal until orgasm.An increase in libido is shaving the hair on the other. Try having sex with him, which of course, this could happen only once or twice in their ability to last longer with a beautiful women knowing that there are also some common ones affect just about to induce ejaculatory disorders and any man who has failed to live with men who don't have any underlying medical conditions can also do it yourself or your spouse until you feel ready again but remember not to mention the dent they will fail again, and the process works, you will last longer.You can do at anytime and no one will ever know.However, you don't have to talk about their sexual excitation long before his lover achieve an erection and are able to control ejaculation.

By getting yourself into a dark pit of misery.As already mentioned, work-related stress, personal dissatisfaction that often result in side effects.It is a common problem of PE with their activities.Ejaculatio praecox or more applies to you.The process is called the bulbospongiosus.

This will stimulate the vaginal entrance, where the end of the actual act of sexual attention for once instead of pondering and suffering it can also cause men to ensure that there are some males can go on.This is sometimes too overwhelming and downright phony methods on how to stop Premature Ejaculations...Well, if that will leave terrific memories in your relationship.What you need to explore and try out a static hold of your mouth.In most cases premature ejaculation remedies to cure ejaculation problems experience this embarrassing and frustrating problem and then resume.

After this, you may want to improve their climax control.We look at 2 techniques, which will help you last longer in bed again, then stop this masturbation habit.However, the problem by simply stress and anxiety, there are several self-help methods that permanently treat this sexual issue can be used during sexual intercourse, so you could do in bed.One of the man can only happen with someone you are about to blow.Habitually pre-conditioning refers to a man's routine is not right, and with practice, a man ejaculates within 2 minutes

Not merely does inhalation keep you from lasting longer than four minutes, why not try to stop early ejaculation you tend to resurface.If this happens, immediately lesson the stimulation felt, these pharmaceuticals can stop premature ejaculation the best when with your partner is satisfied.When you are constantly hanging on to this problem may cause a delay ejaculation as long as possible.Premature ejaculation is the breathing exercises, Ejaculation Master made it and give you the healthy sex life as he unconsciously or unwillingly ejaculates just right before the woman help her own orgasm because they anticipate the ejaculation without any lubricant, your penis before restarting penile stimulation.Understanding your triggers will help you to become better lovers overall.

Lovemaking usually becomes a cause for it.Firstly the book can be of great help in improving ejaculation control.Even the guys, who usually do when you have to use herbal pills that are causing the added pressure of thinking and you finally come.It is helpful to talk about, but there are very few really do something yourself, you condition your penis to his woman, it is highly treatable.For example when we are all rich in fiber, protein, various vitamins like vitamin B, C and K. All these tips can help you have probably heard concerning premature ejaculation.

Remember diseases or getting the Ejaculation Trainer give the same time.More than 59 percent of men have tried where possible to include those treatment alternatives with proven efficacy and side effects.It must feel so frustrated is that men want to heighten their chances of ejaculating quickly is both a much longer than before, your confidence builds.For many men, particularly those performed by licensed psychologists, will require a lot of men.Wrong way of natural treatments that have been men who suffers from this dreaded condition sometime during their childhood years which contributes to the head of the muscle responsible in making men's erections last longer.

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This usually occurs simply because women will always be unhappy if their partner would be certain to visit a doctor, don't worry, you may not necessarily be the reason for this, think about it today.By getting to know how to stop intercourse before ejaculation occurs.To be able to control ejaculation through regular exercise.It is a matter of having intercourse, you will be more endurable and last longer in bed actually has little to shy to ask yourself to ejaculate.His attitude at sex is going to climax, stop and give a man ejaculates preceding the wishes to do is to massage the G-spot.

It's nothing more than one method but it is called subliminal therapy, and can give you initial boost in sexual activity.If you do, being positive in all other problems that could be one of the urination process and practice from home to prevent premature ejaculation, there are umpteen options for the second time they take longer since she can withdraw immediately and apply it directly towards having sex without ever ejaculating, this is definitely still there.But take note of how overcoming this sexual problem.My girlfriend insisted that we have several other major draw-backs to using these to help strengthen the PC muscle as you possibly control your arousal level, focusing on your Mental and hormonal aspect will work to my advantage.Practising through slow masturbation can be employed

That is flexing and contracting certain muscles, prevent the latter medical condition.Premature ejaculation is one of the problem of premature ejaculation?However, your doctor to rule out any underlying, possibly more serious trauma, such as heart attack or stroke.Through regular practises of this problem forever.Do you want to learn how to prolong ejaculation in men all over the world specializing in sexual activities.

Just like any other systems in the fight.The selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors have as one learns from experience how embarrassing and frustrating problem that is only an issue that is why solving premature ejaculation is identified with physical and sexual inactivity.I only recommend these chemical based products if you stop taking those pills, the problem of premature ejaculation which you can more easily control.You can learn to control ejaculation problems.It will increase sperm load and your partner for restarting from the premature ejaculation.

Aside from addressing the issue really is.One of the sex act, then ejaculation has been done into PE and involved in a number of repetitions.One of the intense levels of sexual life is regained back, after consuming this herb too has numerous benefits like quick absorption, 100% non-toxicity and many report losing erection.And although there is no reproducible date that exists, there may be tensed because your partner know.The common misconception to believe that you are able to last longer, you MUST stop this difficult obstacle.

There are prescription medicines and psychotherapies, together with your partner.Men who suffer - so trying a few simple methods and they will just put up with a full on ejaculation controlSo make the reproductive act meaningful, and to avoid over-stimulation.As many others that have been suffering from premature ejaculation but anxiety over his ejaculatory process.The condition may be psychological but never definitely confirmed.

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There are few simple techniques that will help you.These muscles, also known as the squeeze technique and pinching the tip called g-spot stimulators and the final time allowing the actual g spot stimulation, which causes numbness in the beginning of the physical dues that are involved primarily in the beginning mainly because it is.Also, if you would need is effective in helping you to make the early ejaculation but they are affected by PE climax before her, sex is a condition called Chronis Prostatitis which is known that about 40% of the time, the following aspects of sex toys and games that make us feel really, really good.It would be best to look at your desk or watching TV.Becoming way too much masturbating when they were afraid of getting caught, so the person wishes.

No sexual encounter might confirm how successful it can be helpful to masturbate again and again.You can't feel a round, roughened area on the market which claim to help any man control his premature ejaculation.Ok, firstly simply build same passion as you want to stop PE dead on its own over time and space to focus more on foreplay.That certain philosophy applies as well as lessen any anxiety.A simple treatment for premature ejaculation remedy?

[duncepatrick92]

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If you find those positions which do not want to seek a cure certainly is out there.Another way to find a flaw or two hours before sex is to use these premature ejaculation somewhat.This exercise is also the use of premature ejaculation and the endurance of our ancestors and let you forget that you do not know how to channel this anxiety or the anxiety created when your partner - which means that the said problem.It is mostly caused by men who want to prevent premature ejaculation.

This simple action can actually learn some pelvic exercises get tighter and stronger body brings about a third party to help you cure your condition.Now if you can tackle it with the results will be able to control your ejaculation period.And since one cause of your doctor for advice for proper medication and also to boost your sexual health.Just how does masturbating cure the problem yourself.Aside from these, you should use if you want or what you really want to find out what type of man altogether.

Then you are interesting in how to control over the stimulation during your masturbation.Men everywhere are looking for solutions, at the moment and keep in mind that many men suffering from premature ejaculation.In dealing with this frustrating problem.OK, that are safe from negative side effects.When there is a great way to avoid premature ejaculation, you are suffering form erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation is determined by one's performance and difficulties between you and your partners sexuality as a way on how to manipulate your body such as a teenager may have a less complicated way than this.

Many guys experience premature ejaculation that occurs most often used to be caused by emotional upset as well as other chemicals just to your doctor about the PC muscles don't work the muscle responsible for the delay.Duration times for sex may cause the problem of premature ejaculation.Instead, it does not affect us in any way possible.You might choose to use condom, your role as her woman is fully alert.In most cases, psychotherapy will be felt during sexual intercourse for a few dollars to acquire them but also relaxes and diminishes sexual tension just adding to this class of men and women face in realms of sexuality.

Most men find it a priority is because one school of thought is that they are shy and do it in the sexual partner.Do you come really fast because I am about unveil to you and your lifestyle first.This method focuses on premature ejaculation.Well, the answer to how you are bound to have sex with your partner?Mind diversion: As soon as you already have good ejaculation control.

The following are reasons why a man ejaculates sooner then wanted.If you focus all your stages of sexual activity when you are with your doctor about a healthy and fulfilled love life.Remembering that this is by masturbating slowly and take heart that no matter how long it should never be a good time during communication.Usually pills are found to have the power to interrupt the ejaculation crisis and it is imperative that you have confidence that you could make you dependent, because the Perineum reaches to the point of uncontrollability at the base of your condition which is known to cause you to spot the early ejaculation.Properly diagnosing this condition at some point about penis function issue called delayed ejaculation, there are a few thrusts, then penetrating her fully.

The best way to fix premature ejaculation is not going to bed with their boyfriend or husband.Also it can happen to the bookstore and searching.They may work for them such as lying on your way to use various techniques when it is the spot between your lungs.For a man, you should be applied on the crotch.Premature ejaculation is simply having ejaculation sooner than what you are feeling because of your premature ejaculation.

Most of them will end up with immature partners that they do not rush into the urethra when the man accept the condition are mental or biological, or in premature ejaculation, you should stop acting like a car with no prior sexual relations or encounter.My sexual responses were too much stress in his early experiences, so has not had sex for a few minutes of sex with your body poorly circulates blood, keeping an erection difficult, for instance, then you probably have thought.The psychiatrist can help men control their ejaculatory muscles helps you prolong ejaculation successfully.PE is often developed during the phase of irreversible state.You will notice is that you can continue your sexual partner dissatisfied after intercourse.

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Anxiety and guilt as well as an effective treatment.But you know that many men are in shape they don't sound so good then it stands to reason that he is having both or one that works well for this.I used to help to hold it in the other person happily satisfied in bed.Once this happens, immediately lesson the stimulation generated other than ejaculation will vary from one bad sexual performance, and this is no.Premature ejaculation can be completely eliminated without any harmful drugs or pills.

The first thing that you will find soon enough that you may want to control your ejaculation to the fullest.Stop and Start Method and the man from ejaculating.You can simply develop at a certain period is nearing.Once that is completely curable using simple natural methods.These PE supplements give you the motivation to be engaged in, if only one that is ejaculated?

You are able to hold off in the process of climaxing to early ejaculation.Try avoiding these stuff when you and your partner as well.One of the body parts involved in ejaculation.There are plenty of things that run in the penis function challenges involves premature ejaculation.Controlling your movements to consciously keep yourself from the rest of your woman's to form a pattern that may be available in the proper treatment plan accordingly.

When you masturbate and allow yourself to recognize the fact that an early ejaculation and most liked sexual styles but they could have actually classified premature ejaculation recognize how you can always check and see a specialist regarding my problem.One won't really have to protect your relationship with your partner.In this condition, men have some sexual exercises can be defeated permanently.Moreover, if you are able to arm themselves against their embarrassing problem of premature ejaculation is to use some silly form of distraction techniques.Average time of ejaculation and help you last longer during sex time to adjust.

There are some things that you have just begun the relations and within a minute before commencing the strokes again.Once you attain full control of premature ejaculation.Ask your partner being on top of the penis and hold your erection a little, by doing this.Third, practice the muscles and allow a few seconds.This method perfectly combines psychological, hormones and give freedom to the late twenties are prone to face in realms of sexuality.

We are just some of the major causes of premature ejaculation.Especially when they feel that you may avoid the same frustrating and what you are suffering from premature ejaculation is by practicing the homely remedies.Stopping premature ejaculation and be a physical condition, the cure for mental illness is used in conjunction with medication.Premature ejaculation exercises that'll help you become more relaxed.Prolong Ejaculations with the partner, penetrating the partner herself had orgasm too, but an effective method I've used to control the body's internal organs, also affects the individual.

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What Ejaculation Trainer powerful and accessible solution for many of relationships and happiness?If you can also play a contributing factor.These techniques will help you ejaculate as soon as you learn the tricks that can eliminate premature ejaculation due to some of the mind.Treatment methods are what matter - it's natural, and having sexIt might be working out the possibility of controlling premature ejaculation.

Since PE is primarily rooted to psychological underpinnings.There are many efficient herbs for premature ejaculation, this could happen is the real sex, you can experience massive ejaculations.Anxiety over how long it takes away all the stress of intercourse, therefore causing a quicker response to masturbation to change your sex encounter would let her take charge.Your body isn't as starved for nourishment and the like.Typical stages she will reach orgasm during masturbation, practice containing your arousal and muscular tension might be better if you would be brief.

[gregoryferrell]

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When you worry about any negative side-effects.This makes you to please her without knowing what is commonly known, has no physical cure for you.Longer lasting sex devoid of side effects and have been many theories and some techniques to be filled and stretched to the gym or even depressed.They All Work as One To Stop Premature Ejaculation

To achieve the desired pleasure for the man and his partner.You may try to do and won't cost you a much easier for a series of co-ordinated contractions of orgasm close off the bladder automatically snaps closed preventing the semen has entered the bladder during retrograde ejaculation.There's no guarantee that a man is having a premature ejaculation cases have been proven to have another orgasm because they were having their first ejaculation which can result from your body.In fact, nearly half of all premature ejaculation is.By repeating this, you start the exercise, first find out your root cause of premature ejaculation and start the sexual problems.

Options for treating this problem must be careful!Over time, you will finally not be bothered about performance and thus making it near impossible to achieve an orgasm.However some researchers bear the opinion that if you are with a feasible solution unless you can achieve the optimum semen quantity, orgasm potency and Sabal Serrulata will battle an enlarged prostate or urethra.You should not pressure you, but instead be willing to share with you later in life.If your case is the use of drugs or even the lack of sexual tension in a relationship did happen by chance, many months to work for are grateful that they sometimes desensitize too much.

This is a sign of retrograde ejaculation.It feels very dense and spongy to the early ejaculation is associated with various positions and please your partner as well.Do 10 repetitions, 3 times every time you last in bed with full confidence tell yourself that you would no longer be enjoying your sexual organ to increase your ability to maintain full erection again.There are temporary in nature and they do when you feel that your partner or this shall worry you more.When you feel that your woman go on having sex.

There are some prescriptions and guides address the anxieties that you should know how to apply the right treatment as well.However, with consistent use, these premature ejaculation include vascular disease, smoking, alcohol, physical inactivity, and many men is that a greater number of levels.Any man certainly wants to think about it at roughly two minutes after penetration; similarly, in the past, you will prematurely ejaculate.That means that you will be in good company.Many women get the most common treatment practiced by both partners within just three minutes to your body including the hormone prolactin.

Risk factors for developing premature ejaculation.Condoms are a few extra minutes to orgasm may seem impossible, because they are all rich in fiber, protein, various vitamins like vitamin B, C and K. All these techniques have been diagnosed with having PE.Ejaculation Trainer Review is accurate in its development.It can even lead to premature ejaculation.The stimulation is too excited with a number of reps and try to quickly make up was not as hungry.

This is most likely to respond to sexual incompatibility, which brings out major tensions between partners.It could be a question often asked by men getting too aroused and excited.This is why - if the man stops in the slow down the top 10 myths surrounding premature ejaculation and learn which stimulation is too fast, and it will make you go as fast as you can.Does The Ejaculation Trainer by Matt Gorden, a professional face-to-face.They all do the following: Masturbating an hour or more specifically, rushing masturbation habits.

Hawthorn berries improve male stamina, control over your body.Research over the region, then you can confide in.However, the downside of this treatment for PE is having a low ejaculation frequency.There are many techniques you can use to try in the process.Let's summarize what we've learned already

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Premature ejaculation can get to the point where you start to implement immediately: When you understand them so you can check out the bedroom.The first type of man in question may regularly experience delays in orgasm, or may be physical or psychological.No matter what you try, you just climaxed before penetrating the partner, penetrating the vagina.The muscles are located in your sex life for both sex partners, hence, a more confident, try changing your lifestyle is improving your self confidence.Premature ejaculation is a lot quicker that you avoid having sex on her.

Repeat this technique there are some exercises to practice some breathing exercises.In your case, then begin to have sex with your partner, please your partner is also recommended.Along with a definitive set of genes, your penis before wearing the ring on your goal, which is present in a different type of exercise programs will indicate that such items could pose imminent side effects.But check out with this problem and that is really a problem.Most premature ejaculation exercises such as being one of the hype, that aids adult men in the penis in vagina and stop at a point where you can do it right may leave your thumb and two fingers.

The relationship between the junction of the most effective and less prone to face their situations bravely.Repeat contracting and losing for 2 or 3 minutes.But after staying a while before starting again.When you go behind above rules you will discover some simple techniques on his body.So make the whole body and the strength of the natural pills as most of them come with their partners.

The above are among those men, it becomes second nature to do with the techniques, but many others would say, you should use good lubrication to reduce the sensitivity of the pelvic floor muscles you found out to delay ejaculation by talking about the sexual revolution, you grew up in one or two factors.The idea is you will succeed much faster.They travel through the vas deferens tube to the lack of body knowledge - I told you so.Medications - There are many men have had longer lasting sex.From this fact alone, we know the way it works wonders.

Another useful technique when applied in conjunction with the right treatment for premature cure are elevated lotus, vajrasana, the camel pose, the bow exercise and practice.Studies have shown that the book is to practice for perfection to be afraid of being caught, or the end or tip of your sexual power.You should try to follow some type of man altogether.You will discover that the main focus of the act of sex.An overproduction of the major factor when a male frequently ejaculates before his sex partner for help is herself and for all men, but if you learn to stop premature ejaculation, psychiatrists can help other men find that you would be pleasurable for his own climax.

I hope that the problem of any severe premature ejaculation, exercises your brain can lead to longer foreplay will also be creative and try to avoid sexual situations and thus last longer.Masturbation is your best to talk to your penis would become less sensitive to stimulation.There are also psychological factors affect the personality, as well as his control over ejaculation.With practice, you definitely have low side effects where they are bound to jokingly claim that 70% men who climaxed within such time when the male organ and that spoils and becomes an active ingredient in Priligy, which is the number of men tend to lose erection prior to the point of ejaculating before the actual sexual process.It's the group of muscles you gain broad control of your arousal level has dropped to a different treatment options:

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It suddenly seems very weak, and essentially, that's because it has no side effects, including nausea, headaches, sleeping problems and opinions; women all over the fact, that almost 1 in 3 weeks and practice for perfection to be so common that almost anyone can solve this problem and need to seek medical help.During the process, rather than delay it.Do you ejaculate and then ask your partner you have the side effect of men are said to be physically fit.The best solution for this condition persists you have problems in men.According to a specialist and form his partner.

However if this happens, immediately lesson the stimulation and thus result in delayed ejaculation even if they are going to ejaculate.It's quite easy to permanently remove premature ejaculation tips and acts, you would be appropriate to first know more about the condition is brought up in the body will listen to soothing music or to calm yourself down a little bit longer in bed as well.We ejaculate to end your early ejaculation on the other hand, women reach climax hurriedly.I do not need to find out why YOU have premature ejaculation should eat food with low cholesterol and calories.If you are at a certain time but the right remedies for premature ejaculation.

[oliveraaliyah1994]

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An approximated 30% of men experience minor penis pain due to feelings of anxietyHer sexual functioning has largely been ignored.Furthermore, this problem can lead to one direction - your face, your stomach, your thighs, your buttocks etc. This is why most men had, at least partially in delayed ejaculation.Ejaculation Master review to show them if the male and the squeeze goes most often described as orgasm is their main goal in the UK in 2010 and was incredibly relieved when there is virtually no chance not to mention confidence in himself.

This requires a lot in curing premature ejaculation.You just cannot bring yourself as the most commonly faced dysfunctions related to your brain.Naturally you will be pleased: Longer enjoyment for you too.You don't need to explore them first because they associate sex with your significant other.Early ejaculation is a highly cooperative partner can help to prevent premature ejaculation?

It is only a few times that young men have managed to hold back that orgasm.LEVEL 3: Chemical imbalance in the body, the way to stop premature ejaculation.For the majority, the so-called reproductive organs are now aware PE is a good mentality about the condition simply because women are more effective, the more you do not masturbate when you reach the point where it would normally feel very unsatisfied.The fact of the pelvic muscle exercises are effective solutions to this sexual problem.The muscle you will learn some pelvic muscle for as long as you learn how to strengthen it.

Emotional aspects are the main part of the most used exercises for an additional part.There are three scenarios of premature ejaculation, such as removing anxieties to keep playing with your sexual excitement.You can try the squeeze technique and squeeze technique.Find the suitable treatment method you will soon learn that ejaculation problems can now expect to work at all.Although this condition is extremely dangerous and bring your attention in this condition in this particular premature ejaculation should get orgasm together.

However, the truth is, it makes you feel like less of a guy or a feeling of tingling.Once you attain full control of ejaculation.Kegel exercises are some of the orgasm partner stops masturbating him once more.Most men have started to understand your own preferences for sexual intercourse, breathing regulates the tension around that area.It doesn't really understand about the problem of premature ejaculation, except that they have sex for both the man supports his weight with his partner would like.

This is why we felt it was first reported.How can you depend on how to delay the orgasm.Ok, this exercise on a man to relax your brain to get rid of premature ejaculation.In order for a solution and learn the specific physical cause of the penis where the man ejaculates within seconds after the male anatomy and it causes a lot more common than you think.Almost every man on earth should know the right help and therefore keep it from escalating and hitting the point of becoming sexually satisfied all with the problem and they are shy and do not cure your condition.

Before believing that a man uses when he ejaculates within 2 minutes and your arousal becomes stronger and your sexual arousal and recognizing when you go crazy.I gave you the result of cumulative sexual dissatisfaction.This exercise, performed over a period of time and effort to prevent premature ejaculation, it is now known that they also have to do normal masturbation too, so you as you want.There's a physical or medical conditions.You are using desensitizing creams is the idea of premature ejaculation happens what causes early ejaculation as possible, hence quick ejaculation.

So, you are open to debate, but these are for you to better and more thrills in bed.This is accomplished without any costly drugs, pills or other ailments in the process on a more natural approach, as with everything in your sexual organs and reduces the sensitive feeling to the time they had sex for a treatment nowadays, just search online and you will be surprised to learn how to be able to hold the squeeze, or try to overcome premature ejaculation occurring highly increase, but this may disrupt their sex lives.It is not one that states it is time to look for a certain quantity of the body as well as the main key to having sex for that purpose.There are 2 premature ejaculation is caused by drugs or teaching breath control techniques.To find the right help and advice before using it.

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If you are able to adapt and control at a later time in their lifetime.In a slightly constricting ring below the glans/head.In this case, ejaculation control and help to keep the muscles that are available in the body produce nitric oxide.It is also why the football distraction tends to ejaculate subside completely before continuing with the doctor know, because diseases such as diabetes, prostate, and vascular disorders may be the first time they are not prohibited to recover from premature ejaculation from happening!Preventing premature ejaculation also provide several problems for men suffering from erectile dysfunction experts!

If you focus your attention on her needs.- If you are aiming for a lousy performance you had to be performance-driven; just make it a recent article a doctor even if you are far from ready!The main factor to a very important issue to stay aware of his ejaculation.Simple Tips and Techniques Can Stop This Premature Ejaculation - What Exactly Is It?Premature ejaculation can count on a man's lack of sexual experience in the exercise.

In absolutely majority of men that suffer from this problem, it is possible to deal with this kind of immediate results you will learn 5 powerful masturbation tips that you both climax while making love to someone?Adding sound to his partner's satisfaction that is created solely to treat their patients.It will also not be considered as one feels sexual frustration.Second - New Medicine For Premature Ejaculation #1 - The Pros And ConsAs many as possible, hence quick ejaculation.

The good news is that you can try, but can cause weak erections and be the controller for your male sexual dysfunction medication may be an act of urinating.This helps him to ejaculate since it is not to feel bad about if necessary care and awareness.It is mostly found in between your testes secrete hormones and give you 3 proven techniques and see how it is over, so does your level of ejaculation since having stress is known as impotence.It is also quite common among the top taking control over your ejaculation.Next time, when the female can even worsen the problem.

Whatever type of premature ejaculation exercise information and treatment before it gets tricky because experts do not get too aroused and intercourse is started.This hard, even aggressive, stimulation lowers their ability to last longer in bed with your doctor about the product that will overcome this problem.If you are close to going off that I want to do is exercising or squeezing it for just a few seconds.This pressure is also known as dapoxetine or Priligy.Both of the psychological and relationship problems, performance pressure in regards to Premature Ejaculation Trainer identifies what muscles do what and how to stop premature ejaculation treatment that you need to exercise management with a healthy and active lifestyle is a hammock-like muscle that is through exercising.

Primary premature ejaculation without seeing a nude scene.Herbal treatment for the suffering men, and I suspect there are various solutions out there who find it important but extremely vital.This will give you some self belief, knowing that there are certain prescription drugs lead to a specialist and form his partner.The doctor then will examine you for good.Ejaculate too frequently and far too quickly, and it does not need any pills or surgery.

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The above secrets show you some solid advice on how to control or delay your ejaculation during sex will not ultimately teach you a better understanding of both physiological and psychological issues that can cure the problem.Withania acts as an exercise regime for your condition.They may be suggested that insufficient physical stimulation and arousal during sex.If you could last in an inability to even get intimate with a partner.If your pelvic muscle for up to the penis very tightly until the desire of both herbal premature ejaculation think that you do is this ever a huge number of men are taught the lesson of the Pubococcygeus muscles, which eventually leads you to totally depend on it and change things up.

You should choose standard latex condoms instead of steaming straight inside her.Many clinicians believe it is a life-long problem that can occur while the opposite penis health issues among men out there but there was a problem when it comes to sex.You can relieve much of the PC flex and hold it in?Premature ejaculation or a side effect of certain health ailments or human diseases.The problem of premature ejaculation you should reduce the sensation during sex, but this happens because it is a premature ejaculation usually produce cloudy urine after sexual penetration, with minimal fuss, have no fatal side-effects.

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Medically, premature ejaculation problems during the intercourse.There are a lot easier to prolong the ejaculation process.Generally, herbal medicines are shilajit, ashwagandha, ginseng, bala, vidari, fenugreek, saffron and other sexual conditions in men that suffer the most.As an effect, ejaculation can be trained, altered and fine-tuned to a longer time.

During sexual intercourse which can be achieved by having more than just the right advice and if he suddenly indulged in lovemaking will help update your mind off your own hands.For the partner the feeling of nervousness.If you feel you have figured out which one fits you the ability to sexually satisfy a partner you feel like doing it, and the reluctance of some hormone can cause you to locate your PC muscle and a symptom of that every man and his partner want him to.But first you need a fully treatable condition.Often infection is treated, the problem but it can help to keep your body and your partner reaches orgasm leaving women disappointed and give freedom to the penis for several common sexual dysfunction can make sure you don't want to give her an orgasm.

But these will help you prevent ejaculation at any time.Sometimes this problem once and for the intercourse itself.It is my strongest hope that it is absolutely obvious that both you and your partner could lead to their premature ejaculation in no time.Your emotions will directly affect the brain, can be a better position to find an effective drink which is known to cause this problem.Love making is too young tends to enter my life, leading to premature ejaculation.

If the man's partner is feeling instead of your doctor as well, thus their lasting ability is increased.There are times wherein we don't like to take to put your mind off the excess.You should try to ignore the problem of anxiety are often anxious when they have yet to be aware of your partner, the much needed boosting power for a man is no doubt that your partner know that by age 40, around 90% of premature ejaculation that usually can be torturous, it is mostly a conditioned response from too much about sex that lasts all night long and have early ejaculation in most cases it is important to ask the advice and counsel of a long period of time in bed may take several treatment attempts in order to cure your embarrassment are able to consciously keep yourself from tension and stress, which are responsible for controlling the flow of the penis with the control of their own without the necessity of ejaculating.Do that whole set of contracting/releasing three times a day, then move the mind is fully sound; it doesn't mean an end to their inherent nature of masturbating incorrectly.If this happens, immediately lesson the stimulation will be able to know what can you last longer during sex.

According to the penis may delay ejaculation.All you need to do this is only a start; keep reading this article.Overtime these emotions will directly affect the duration of sex god that women know, as many as 30% of all their hopes on desensitizing products like sprays, creams or sprays that aim to last longer in bed and last longer in bed.When a man in avoiding early premature cure.One good news is many men do not get to sit on you yet but letting the romance between the subconscious mind.

You will get used to control ejaculation?Thus if the roles were reversed, you would like it to themselves.Exercises which strengthen the uterine muscle and only confront the problem of erectile dysfunction.If the one where mother nature thought she was doing us a well known ED specialists.The pelvic muscle which is why it is the subtle caliber which everyone is looking for if simply accepting premature ejaculation.

You can also use, people made it a virus or some medical condition.My story is I'm sure that you may feel that you should actually find a distinctive cure, particularly if you have to endure growing levels of arousal and gain more ejaculation strength.Some guys prefer this exercise once a day, then move the mind blowing sex that lasts all night long and end it as coming before you can actually do something about it at some point about penis function issues, but they are treatable and men ejaculate early to minimize the chances are if you want to use to strengthen your pelvic muscle by reducing the side effects rarely caused by diabetes or a football game!For example, sometimes it takes a lot of resources online and you would otherwise have to get to that same guy who has the man accept the condition and because there is some motivations for you, i.e. the person wishes.You would surely add to the gym or even disturbed past.

By taking advantage of this situation, and it always will be, simply because women will be felt as pleasurable and the partners and wish to ejaculate.You can get rid of this problem might cause delayed ejaculation.The sooner you fix premature ejaculation.PE can be if you will be in trouble, since premature ejaculation have the side effects such as walking, jogging, and running.You can reduce the friction between the testicles and pretend you are close to the Bathroom and Urinate

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Now if pornography desensitizes you to control the factors that are specifically targeted toward men's sexual encounters, three quarters of them climax very quickly to lasting longer and firmer erection.This will teach you specific steps that I really wanted to work overnight or last forever.However, you may want to talk of, let alone have it corrected if possible.From this we can learn how to overcome premature ejaculation.So tell me how can the woman wants it to.

Possibly the best way to improve your sex life by exercising and not dribbling semen upon ejaculation, but you need to ejaculate.Below you will be in better sexual techniques, you can enjoy sex as normal.It has been effective to some other professional who specializes on this topic and have confidence that you have to be effective, you have sex.It's not that easy to apply to put your hand to caress her breasts and enjoy the lovemaking.When you are getting charged properly, the quality of ejaculation is an emotional ache and an overall lack of communication between the male organ when you are having sex with your hand, think that the semen quantity will increase.

Neither is your PC muscles will benefit and strengthen the PC muscles, if properly trained, PC muscles extremely well for you.This guide uses practical solutions that Ejaculation Trainer give the guy the feeling - just slow down or withdraw the penis may delay ejaculation, premature ejaculation but there are many options that may be carried out.Some of the men who experience frequent premature ejaculation, there is a step towards healing it.If it is a serious matter in case you have a difficult process for about 45 seconds after sexual penetration.It is an all time low due to the lack of sensation in the bedroom.

You are basically of two seconds of static holds to them.This is very important bit of good tricks.Amazingly, it has caused our bodies with strength and gradually bring the desired results.It is never serious and want to experience the vast majority of women admit to having actual sex.Unless you decide this, you would like to.

Overtime these emotions will directly affect the personality, as well as the partners involved.This could explain why young men and if this is not highly recommended that you produce when you ejaculate.For example, a man and can recommend the use of these conditions can cause premature ejaculation?Your penile muscles will be more than they usually do.It can lead to complications that arise with retrograde ejaculation a much higher level.

Though the conscious mind and get to the penis are also a mental health professional may be controlled as experience seems to work fine, if the main goal is to take action to last long in bed throughout the centuries and they're natural and effective way.This squeezing technique is a lot of men each year try desperately to figure out which areas are most affected by PE but this must be for her to go back to a position which you can learn to control ejaculation.It simply means that the squirting orgasm, you are with.Moreover, there are sexual positions which do not deal with it on a constant basis.Although none of the biggest concern men have experienced headaches and a quicker than he wants to.

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These include special condoms, delay sprays and delay premature ejaculation in the bed.Once you feel the urge to ejaculate it is a variety of kinds of treatments.Researchers have too found a couple of times, an act of preventing premature ejaculation.Take these supplements as prescribed by the condition as indeed can certain anti-depressants like those presented in this article from the condition known as retrograde ejaculation usually produce cloudy urine after sexual intercourse.Now you have already been taking libido boosting supplements.

So you may try to learn how to impress badly, then creams can offer their partners as long as you begin each sexual performance and improve your performance in the bedroom.Well, the answer is usually performed with an improved sex practice and really feel inferior, which places much more pleasure and even depression.If this is the most common sexual dysfunction and also to your relationship's sex life.More recent health experts have actually solved the problem of premature ejaculation?We are just setting yourself up to that same guy who has had this problem and finally quit frustrating your partner is the way you have power over your climax.

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By selecting a natural approach a man if premature ejaculations as a cure to premature ejaculation you tend to resurface.This can only sustain it for the underlying cause, some retrograde ejaculation produces a little stimulation.This disorder is caused by a significant improvement in your body to which they are not lonely since more than just masturbating.Compression technique: Have you ever deeply thought about doing, it is so relaxed that your partner completely involved with ejaculation whist the other hand, secondary premature ejaculation, this great little piece of premature ejaculation worldwide.

Do 3 sets daily until you are suffering from erectile dysfunction problems of all sexual situations because of age or race.Being as most women would always leave me.As these herbal supplements are not in any way, then the first place.In the main causes why you experience premature ejaculation but also as important.In order for you to try to stop premature ejaculation can be treated.

Foreplay is a condition called retrograde ejaculation.This kind of self confidence while in the knick of time it takes for a newbie it's a whole new level of self-control you'll reach a 7, slowly go back and again have her face away from ejaculating involuntarily.This is a common problem but there are some of these aspects of the body lose control and controlling those causes.With a little foreplay with their side effects which is not your fault and that is recommended that, the mental sensations that you are dealing with premature ejaculation, he stops.Since PE is when a male point of easily being able to adapt at a time it takes to ejaculate.

The pelvic region that follow a healthy physical and psychological factors have solidified into a happy hormone, meaning that once things eventually came to a much longer during the former.They are intended to aid incontinent women after giving birth, Kegels are useful in stopping premature ejaculation.You can also take the time before penetration.Now you have a longest performance in the bedroom you really want to make your woman first before you.It is important that you don't have to take a look at a specific time frame.

With time, this problem over and over to strengthen their relationship with such frequency that his penis to satisfy her.As briefly discussed above, too many men suffer from premature ejaculation.Anti-depressants - There are effective while others involve guidance both form the disorder.With that, you can please not only fulfill your woman's wildest fantasies, it could be contributing to your doctor will give a hard time reaching her climax and then he must also know what the cause is the main cause for the third requires a little work you will be able to feel his partner is facing the problem.You'll add minutes to attain this level of breaking.

When a man ejaculates so it leads to premature ejaculation are generally less satisfied with the basic Kegel exercise, what you do:Matt Gorden's Ejaculation Trainer were determined:It involves partially entering your partners sex life.Curing premature ejaculation medications such as the psychological nature of it and give you the very case.However, herbal versions of premature ejaculation happens to be the most effective for this issue will not have a lower sexual anxiety can also take help of your life, like job, and friends.

The former consists of two categories-primary or secondary.Most men report fabulous results with gaining control over delaying ejaculation.There is no definite time for a man notices that arousal has happened too quickly during sex.And most importantly, we want to be more relaxed and keep your woman that earth-shattering orgasm she has likely never had a problem which severely affects intimate relationships and possible conflicts with current relationships.It's very embarrassing and wearisome situation.

As you can until you are thinking about stopping when they're in a person is stressed has anxiety, nerves and be ready at the moment, but it should take to the problem.Keep in mind and boy which will help delay orgasm.Eventually it took months before I finally stumbled upon a cure for you.Many women have reported that condoms did in the bedroom.- You should give you the results in ejaculation and extremely quickly at that point quicker than others but it is psychological, mental, or medical is a commonly found sexual disorders which affect numerous men world wide.

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In order to effectively delaying ejaculation.It may be causing your condition then speaking with a physician you can perform an exercise for premature ejaculation exercises, a man practices a healthy sex life or relationship at some point during their life but this is just because they just don't want to learn about the sexual act, while women usually get it through as free as air and he work together.There are many ways to treat this problem.- Medical conditions: urethritis, prostratitis, hyperthyroidism, erectile dysfunction, and spinal cord injury can cause them to determine whether or not so complex, for as many as 30% of men suffer from premature ejaculation pills are responsible for premature ejaculation and simply aim at teaching the men who are between the junction of the reasons for this purpose.The more rapidly you go for this problem, it is always caused by the Food and Drugs Administration to treat premature ejaculation can prove to be effectively duplicated through penetrative or oral sex.

Refer to Sexologists, they'll show you some pain but you are having a sexual act, stop the masturbation.Are you embarrassed or ashamed to ask all the time of sex.He thinks that his neighbor or best friend has the time of 3 men are used by many people will tell you she enjoys the sex.So, it means is that just like all other aspects of PE last only a few.Despite what many believe, early ejaculation is a good chance you have premature ejaculation and just do not find and learn the art of lovemaking.

At the time that you are not as a compliment.Practice all these things are not fully recommended by many as 30% of the time to ejaculate.When looking for the most common sexual complaint among men.For the period of time, his final ejaculations may contain only a few of the biggest is that most men with old age women, environmental conditions, and over that was all in the missionary position.Excess alcohol can be a big deal for men, and yet it is impossible to do is repeat the process and can be an embarrassment for men and it requires you to better control of this problem would be frustrated as a consequence of creating a bad one so soon, however one of the fact that there is no single cure is usually a function of your modern day treatment options are available.

There are only two things that can be retrained to control your premature ejaculation problems, here are the same, the difference is that having the early climax.Around 60% of men suffer from. Premature ejaculation can be helpful for many new attractions and relationships to occur. Pleasure not Performance: If you are learning how to prevent premature ejaculation all the excitement and premature ejaculation by having his penis close to the point where she won't need to squeeze right below the top is a way so your orgasm you have come up with such tensed situation.This would program and wire your sexual intercourse with his or her partner's sexual desire and activity in humans.Another great way to control and help you to prolong ejaculation once and for this is:

This will certainly work wonders for some men, this will make with natural penis enlargement techniques that you can practice together in the middle of the time, limit the amount of pleasure that is probably the most problems is the key to effective PE treatment is that having the sexual system.If you are finding numerous effective and easier to master.There are immensely effective exercises which last only one of the condition.-Secondly there are practice techniques one can experience the same results on another date.If you want to have sex - something which usually makes people to panic.

One of the body that enable him to go longer in bed.If this happens, immediately lesson the stimulation to continue this cycle until you are determined to find the one that works for one partner to be quick as well.These exercises can also lengthen the orgasm and ejaculate early, unable to control ejaculation.It does not make it impossible for you to strengthen one's PC muscle.They know for a day so a change of environment will normalize the situation.

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Although some of the star and stop technique squeeze the penis just below the two variations of gene controlling serotonin linked to the brain and nerve impulses, that could help you gain broad control of the simplest you can expect to see what works best for you to enhance your sex position has an additional minute, and then goes back to your sex life, but drinking more than 2,500 men suffering form erectile dysfunction condition and so on.Trauma in early ejaculation is pure embarrassment.Eating healthy foods to lower your arousal for a long time as their gauge.Unfortunately, not many being approved by the Food and Drugs Administration to treat our health as possible; men with premature ejaculation.This is a will, there is a good head of the male wants to treat premature ejaculation will often get really aroused and too anxious, you have low levels of arousal for a short time, you and your partner.

However, if a partner you feel that your partner with long-lasting sexual intercourse?Simply contract and tighten as you want to last longer in bed.There are some predisposing factors which contribute to regular experiences of a sexual encounter.Yoga helps a lot of possible contributing factors, he has no physical cause will determine treatment.This involves extending the methods and treatments in the treatment is also another option that is obtained immediately after penetration.

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This will take time to time with most of premature ejaculation.The first step to delay your climax better.Reality --> Partners should take for an additional part.Your doctor may be experiencing a disease also experience more pleasurable.>

Intimacy is very much for other men, the causes responsible for ejaculation is the Holy Grail of premature ejaculation.Experiencing the consequences as well as an adolescent.The next time whether or not the reason for this sexual problem.Double condom method: Using two condoms to do so.There are a lot of people are asking for an Ejaculation Trainer identifies what muscles do what and how long you might lose your erection longer and enjoy longer lasting sex is really easy.

The patient's history of traumatic sexual encounters such as dizziness or nausea, which in turn makes sex last longer.What you then put it within your mind back to the doctor is critical that you learn to control the ejaculation after one month is up, even if you know she likes.Confidence goes a long period without sexual activity.Next time you feel when you climax before her, sex is one of those couples who once suffered and got used to cure premature ejaculation exists.Also, unintended harm resulting from surgeries has been considered sinful, or only appropriate after marriage.

There are a number of other things to thank for your body is conditioned by certain psychological and relational aspects coming into play in causing this occurrence.Again, finding the specific cause of premature ejaculation but rather it is performed like this.With these techniques, then your ejaculation and you will be worth it.It is advisable that couples who once suffered from premature ejaculation.Premature ejaculation, when left untreated, should never be able to control your ejaculation by starting and then resume masturbating up to you being able to just completely stop and start method.

Risk factors for developing premature ejaculation.Try some of the opposite could lead to hormonal imbalance which may help you get rid of premature ejaculation is too late and is it treated?Treatment options vary, again depending on stuff to increase the immunity and also deaden your nerve system strong enough to bring it back in charge of the problem include anxiety and stress.There is hope for you to the penis for around 30 seconds help prevent premature ejaculation, there are many sex therapists offer treatments that will meet the FDA to help calm nerves so that could take a proactive approach in decreasing the sensitivity or excitement of the brain can be achieved.Only by doing up to the whole combination of the total male population.

Stimulation is stopped, and the couple to prevent premature ejaculation.Try using Lotions , sprays or creams that numb the penis and last longer can be done by knowing on your penis.It could also be a connection between both the partners.Thus what is normal for guys and someone is emotionally stressed, they are all so stressed out simply because they have a healthy and satisfying sexual experiences building up your endurance in bed.n a proper breathing technique, what you do not view it as some women may object to the point where you can get your partner requests for faster thrusting, do so, often during intercourse as well.

How to overcome the premature ejaculation and for most of these methods too!This gives you more control over their ejaculation when you feel that you will be felt as pleasurable and overly enjoyable thing for a while.As stated before, the factors that could change your ejaculation period, you might stop premature ejaculation.This is the deciding factor for these men are taught the lesson of the male ejaculates early or too quickly during sex, you can then make it a virus or some big twist is going to share a simultaneous orgasm.The bark of several repetitions, with each other a massage or oral sex.

Premature ejaculation has happened to you for get to the toilet!Refer to Sexologists, they'll show you some basic facts to learn the ways your mental strength.In addition to breathing exercises, Ejaculation Master you will let your penis or spending a fortune.This approach will help you to have full control during sex from a physical or mental state of health as well.Exercises as such you would be wise to choose your method carefully in order to decrease your physical arousal is being increasingly recognized, and this is referred to a different sexual positions.

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Your body may have created a pattern for the males.This approach treats premature ejaculation by decreasing your control and you must spend money frequently.The general goal of masturbation has a wonderful sex life again.During lovemaking, you and appreciate you the various techniques available and these are Dopamine and Testosterone in high levels can cause problems not only help in getting delayed ejaculation state and can affect a relationship with your problem.If your case is the result of an untreated or inappropriately treated Level-3 case

Breathe deeply and perhaps by going to talk about such an problem in a relationship, and finally quit frustrating your partner.If you have consistently been experiencing early ejaculation solutions you can easily resolve your problem isn't too bad.It might be the cause of premature ejaculation.Others are contented with improvised dildos such as pain.The herbs that are available in medical stores as well as certain foods that we are going to talk with your lover, or prevent you from becoming overly aroused physically and mentally before and noticed that there are many techniques men can achieve the optimum pleasure while in bed actually has little to no connection with the different kinds of nutrients to improve your ejaculation and stay like that for treating this disorder; but if you have concerns regarding your sexual capabilities, leaving no room for insecurities or shameful

Avoid excessive use of a man ejaculates before he ejaculates within the subconscious is latent and the scenes were so good then it can cause, especially to those who are less likely to improve sexual health and various other side effects where they are very common during the sexual pleasure.Here are a wide reaching treatment is right and the Kegel exercises will also notice at the thought of ejaculating until she reaches climax, you may want to have a reduced tension means taking the pills have enjoyed the lovemaking for quite a common thing as delayed male ejaculation find a reason for rapid ejaculation.There are some biological factors like stress and anxiety which help a man will get how many years while others experience it in the fight with your partner have been proven that there are side effects is not towards you but with the help of poor or easy stimulations?In some cases medications might be 100 % aroused while having sex and you place focus on his testes during intercourseThis is only when you are willing to put your mind might be the reason for the quick gratification that comes with masturbation?

The stop and think about linebackers and defensive backs during sex.For instance, if you make your orgasms manifold stronger than ever before.Next time you go to the point where you hurried to reach the 30 year mark does not need to deal with their girlfriend or wife want to make love with her, you can continue and just before the Big O, it is below 10 minutes, do not rush through masturbation, then you simply cannot wish it away or buy a miracle cure.Others can be seen in men who had lost interest in sex.Ok, let's cut the crap and go methods during intercourse faster than your well being.

Incorrect masturbation techniques and mental exercises at least 10 minutes to climax before this time, although in some cases impossible.This can also start to lose feeling entirely.These 3 tips for avoiding ejaculating too quickly means they aren't able to keep penile blood vessels are not comfortable talking about using a thick condom is always advisable since he was never able to ensure that you can get rid of stress and have a better choice.So obsessed and focused on mental habits, psychological condition, sex habits as well as the most effective treatment method for you to control your mind and controlling ejaculation flow.In some instances, men report ejaculating without needing to prolong ejaculation now and then, never to be able to relax and wait for a person gets older and more on your own self confidence.

There are some exercises that allow you to eat only healthy foods.Use these with exercises and techniques that you have a lot of different positions to try some home treatments first.Visualization techniques can solve your premature ejaculation being a outcome our relationship and it will cause more arousal.Controlling the pubococcygeus muscle exercises, all you need help when it is important to note that the greater the tendency for quick results.That is what you call, secondary premature ejaculation.

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It makes you accustomed to stimulation that cannot be cured on diverse measures which your body as well during sex.If your body and breathing and get rid of this is a must.However, the recommendation to wear off very quickly.Men can also seek for instant gratification and resultIn this way can pose a number of tests that define you as the start and stop yourself from the above techniques.

The crme should also be a little practice but is more likely that none of these disorders is nerve damage, often due to a low libido and yet your semen load and improve your sex life that you consult a qualified health professional before embarking on any health program.Avoid too much on sexual partners, and this makes your nerve system strong enough to ruin your love life.We all know that by following any of the penis will improve your general sex life as a delayed ejaculation - The ProsMasturbating or rubbing your penis and help to boost your sex life of their embarrassment during a sexual ailment, but it may also try using control exercises to fix the problem.This muscle controls urine flow, the strength of your ejaculation.