#The human experience or some shit

[chaos-creature-on-the-roof]

life is wild

you can be absolutely vibing, knowing life is beautiful and full of awesome experiences and full of potential, but still be passively/actively suicidal

or you can be absolutely depressed and see no beauty or light in life, but you stick around and want to be here anyway

and honestly? Thats kind of cool in of itself

[nova-rpv]

a redraw of the first drawing i posted here to celebrate the fact that ive been in tumblr for more than a whole year posting my shit and havent deleted my blog in panic yippee \:D/ (mushy rant in tags)

[inkskinned]

you have to go to work so you can pay for your doctor, who is not taking your insurance right now, and if you say i can't afford the doctor's you are told - get a better job. it is very sad that you are unwell, yes, but maybe you should have thought about that before not having a better job.

(where is the better job? who is giving out these better jobs? you are sick, you are hurting - how the hell are you supposed to be well enough for this better job?)

but you go to the doctor because you had the nerve to be hurt or sick or whatever else. and they tell you that it is because you have anxiety. you try your best. you are a self-advocate. you've done the reading (which sometimes pisses them off worse, honestly). you say it is actually adding to my anxiety, it is effecting my quality of life. so they say that you are fat. they say that all young people have this happen to them, isn't it a medical marvel! they say that you should eat more vegetables. they say that you probably just need to lose a little more weight, and that you are faking it for attention.

(what attention could this doctor possibly give? what validation? that's their fucking job, isn't it?)

there is always a hypochondriac, right. someone always tells you about a hypochondriac. or someone who is unnecessarily aggressive during the worst days of their life. or someone looking "for a quick fix". or some idiot who wasn't educated about how to properly care for themselves who just abandons their treatment. and again, the hypochondriac, the overly-cautious hysteric. these people don't deserve to be treated like humans (right), and since you might be one of these people, you also don't get treated like a human. because those people can really fuck with the system, you now have to pay for it. and besides. you're actually probably faking it.

(more often than not, you find a 2:1 ratio of these stories. for every "hypochondriac", there are 2 people who knew something was wrong, and yet nobody could fucking find it. the story often ends with pointless suffering. the story often ends with and now it's too late, and it's going to kill me.)

you are actually just making excuses. someone else got that procedure or that diagnosis and he's fine, you should be fine too. someone else said they watched a documentary about other inspirational people with your exact same condition, maybe you should be inspirational, too. you're just too morbid. your pain and your experience is probably just not statistically concerning. it is all self-reported anyway, and you're just being a baby.

(once, while sitting down in the middle of making coffee, you had the sudden, horrible thought - i could kill myself to make the pain stop. you had to call your best friend after that. had to pet your dog. had to cry about it in the shower. you won't, but that moment - god, fuck. the pain just goes on and on.)

you know someone who went in for routine surgery and said i still feel everything. they told her to just relax. it took her kicking and screaming before they figured out she wasn't lying - the anesthetic drip hadn't been working. you know someone who went in for severe migraines who was told drink water and lose weight. you know someone who was actively bleeding out and throwing up in the ER and was told you're just having a bad period.

in the ER there are always these little posters saying things like "don't wait! get checked today!" and you think about how often you do wait. how often the days spool out. you once waited a full week before seeing the doctor for what you thought was a sprained wrist. it had actually been broken - they had to rebreak it to set it.

but you go into the doctor. the problem you're having is immediate. the person behind the counter frowns and says we're not taking your insurance. you will be paying for this out-of-pocket.

they send you home with tylenol and a little health packet about weight loss or anxiety or attention deficit. on the front it has your birthday and diagnosis. you think about crying, and the words swim. it might as well say go fuck yourself. it might as well say you're a fucking idiot. it might as well say light your money on fire and lie down in it. and the entire fucking time - the problem persists.

it's okay. it's okay, it's just another thing, you think. it's just another thing i have to learn to live with.

[diospore]

I'm just saying if you're writing smut featuring trans people and you find yourself ONLY writing pre-op transmen as receiving penetration. ONLY writing your transmen as submissive.

You should really take a step back and think about why this is.

Also consider including trans people who have gotten bottom surgery. I'd like to see more of that. Or transmen using straps. That'd be cool too thanks.

[not-so-superheroine]

Jesus is my older brother, not my dad.

other christians don't seem to feel the same?

am i missing something where he insists on such a thing except perhaps with actual little children?

[uncanny-tranny]

"haha, are you an art gay, a science gay, or a math gay"

Actually, I find the division between art, science, and math to be a very nebulous idea and useless when you actually interact with the universe. The more you learn about the world, the more you surround yourself with art and science and math, and you'll never be able to see it any other way and it will be beautiful. When I take your hand, it won't be the science of our atoms closing the distance between us that we will experience, but the math of our fingers interlocking and the art of our bodies that we will experience. You are math and you are science and you are art, and nothing will make you any lesser💛

[menlove]

"oh so being a woman is just a feeling? you can't even define it" yeah just like being in love is a feeling you can't define man shut the fuck up

[doomdoomofdoom]

any trans person should get HRT for free (no insurance required) and in exchange they should participate in the occasional study/survey.

research into sex hormones and their effects is so scarce and you have a whole ass population group who's willing to not only switch up their hormones but keep it up for very long periods of time. you could run some incredible long term studies with participants across all sorts of demographics.

while it's impossible to conduct any blind studies on this due to observable change in appearance, there's still so so so much data we're giving up on because we'd rather...

lemme check my notes. that cant be right.

...because we'd rather deny trans people health care and let them die. huh.

[afterphantoms]

listen, say what you want abt heartstopper, it is definitely a deeply flawed show but god damn charlie spring is easily the single best example of a realistic, non-stereotypical portrayal of obsessive-compulsive disorder i’ve ever seen. there’s so much misunderstanding around ocd and the MANY ways it can manifest, so for me personally it’s pretty cool that there’s some rep that’s not the (stereotyped) counting/checking/cleaning subtype! this shit would’ve really resonated with me as a teen and might’ve actually helped me get diagnosed earlier!! ocd is oftentimes seen as just like “omg i’m quirky i like organizing my binder 😝” but it’s genuinely one of the most debilitating mental conditions out there and puts you at much higher risk of suicide so it’s really nice to see a portrayal that actually acknowledges how serious the condition is, even when compulsions are less outwardly noticeable

[cuntvonkrolock]

if you mock children's theatre i hate you 🫶

[osamucide]

if this bothers anyone they can kindly feel free to leave or ignore it or whatever but can we stop flooding the x reader tags with half-baked thinkpieces on why people should or shouldn’t do whatever with their writing. every other post is “you shouldn’t romanticize [x]” “you’re problematic if you do [x]” “stop writing about [x]” “[x] is gross and if you write about it kill yourself” how about if you don’t like certain content you heed the content warnings, block the tags, don’t interact with it, so on and so forth. of course part of our responsibility as writers, especially ones dealing with sensitive topics, is to label and tag our works appropriately but let’s be real—i hardly see any writers (at least within the bsd fandom) who don’t make it abundantly clear what they do/do not write about, interact with, or tolerate. wait until you find out how much fucked up shit happens in real life and how much some person on the internet coping with their trauma by writing self insert fanfiction about a cartoon character doesn’t fucking correlate to the perpetuation of that fucked up shit at all. it doesn’t even have to be that serious. people are going to write and read the content they want and they’re allowed to and you spilling your complaints all over the x reader tags “to boost attention” isn’t gonna change that. if you don’t like something ignore, unfollow, block, mind your own business. it’s actually super easy

[queer-ecopunk]

Was chatting and joking around tonight with the lady in front of me at the supermarket as she rung up 3 carts of groceries. Ended up being $700 of stuff.

As she's paying she says something like, "I have never bought this much stuff. Usually I get like how much you have in your basket. How much do you think that is?" And I'm like, "idk, $40?"

And she's like, "I'll pay it." and hands me two twenties. Apparently she won the lottery.

[something-about-sunflowers]

OFMD fandom:

Stop minimizing the severity of harm and manipulation that happens to people in cults by comparing a small fandom subgroup (literally, there are fewer than you're imagining) to cults. Stop acting like people disagreeing with YOU means they're incapable of seeing another point of view. Stop acting like people disagreeing with you is somehow policing you. Stop. . . just. Stop.

For the love of all that is good and joyful in this world just. If you don't want to see Izzy fans or the Canyon then just. Stop. Leave them the fuck alone. Get out of those tags. Stop commenting on their posts. Stop sending them rude shit (or ANY shit) in their ask boxes. Stop making up hypothetical Izzy fans/Canyonites to get mad at. Go get mad at your boss or your government officials or something actually productive instead.

I do genuinely wonder if the more normal people in the fandom see any of this and like. Question this behavior because. Like. Jesus fucking christ.

[lucky-clover-gazette]

i don’t know what the fuck it is about the rito but any time they are involved with music it’s just absolutely unreal. i have heard the voice of god and it’s the rito village theme (normal and blizzard), the revali motif (original form, age of calamity, attack on vah medoh, rising island chain, stormwind arc final phase, flight range ambient) and dragon roost island (the og and the colgera/dragon roost island third phase)

[freebooter4ever]

Sigh. I Hated the guy for his hockey but he's Like That too huh? -_-

also before people start trying to equate sid with what the rat did can i just say that i watched both the 2016 visit and the 2017 visit and sid's behavior was completely different - right up front in 2016, lots of photos, big smiles. Vs 2017 it was very obviously just a formality and sid said nothing. (also also the rat didnt say anything about who he voted for he just parroted the usual southern patriotic line? I dont see why people are jumping to conclusions that he is a diehard conservative from this? I dont think this totally negates the efforts i have seen from the rat in promoting LGBQT rights in a very very red state like florida. Not to defend a guy whose hockey i hate or anything. I just dont think fans should start getting angry at other fans who are willing to overlook this comment, or forget that the rat has said he believes everyone belongs in a hockey locker room during an era in the league where this is not the most popular stance)

(but also blacklisting the rat's name on tumblr works VERY well i should know, lol. Him and the candy cane chicago guy are my two blacklisted names. Its like they dont even exist anymore :P)

(but also i know how hard it hurts to realize that someone you admire from a distance might actually treat you like shit in real life just because of what 'other' group you belong to, so my sympathies to fans going through it right now)

[die-tenebris]

Holy fuck I'm so tired of this. (I mean really I just need to get off reddit but) trans men are a marginalized group who face oppression and violence on the basis of their identity. Full stop. If you dismiss or belittle this fact you are contributing to that oppression. None of us living a marginalized life are sitting on an hierarchy of how easy or difficult our lives are.