#That's cartoon logic! He can do that bc it's funny and he wants to! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

elysicndrcvm · 4 years ago

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━♡ guess the 23 YEAR OLD FEBRUARY baby just arrived to dallyeog! it makes sense, because CHU EUNHA is just as BEDAZZLING as the month of FEBRUARY. wait, why do they remind me of JACOB BAE? beyond that, they seemed JOYOUS and SAVVY upon first glance. i heard someone say they’re sort of DELICATE and QUIXOTIC though. i hope they get acquainted here in COMPLEX 1 / APARTMENT 0215 / FLOOR 3 ; HE seem(s) to have a lot going on with HIS job as a PATISSERIE OWNER/NUTRITIONAL SCIENCE STUDENT. ( ez, 21, she/they, gmt. )

well hey there !! im ez but you fellow dallyeogers can call me ezzy, i have been in dallyeog before so some may remember me as having someone v different to my new bb i bring u now, i joined before with miss tam carmen !! anygays i return with this lil angel who i am all ‘ i say that’s my baby and i’m proud ’ over already even tho i literally came up with him like two days ago. you can find his pinboard here ( which btw i fuckeN love like he’s so aesthetic to me u go king ) and i made him a lil playlist which u can vibe to here. you can learn more about him under the cut but he’s a super soft-hearted gentle dove of a muse and quite...simple for me ?? sdhdh that’s not the right wording but U GET IT djjflg he isn’t super full of angst or trauma he’s just kinda viBIN livin his best life so that’s fun !! but ye without further ado:

so as u kno from his app he owns a patisserie, it’s his lil babey and he is very dedicated to his craft and makin sure all his ideas for the place and the baked goods he sells are like rlly quirky and avant-garde. like he is so passionate about it u dont even KNOW, he tries to make sure most of the stuff on his menu is something like fun and new u wouldn’t get at just any old patisserie or cafe and that it’s super varied and also kinda aesthetic af? the place is very like trendy. it’s called patisserie d’elysian cause ya know he’s an extra biTCHH and proud.

he has three pupperino’s. all as adorable as each other, snickerdoodle is his golden lab and often ppl shorten it down to snickers, butterscotch is his dapple daschund pup, shortens the name to scotchie often. toulouse is his fancy toy poodle boi, shortens the name down as toto. if u are on the shortened name basis with his pups then u can consider urself one of his close pals.

he’s actually adopted by his aunt but she raised him like she was his mother so that is what he considers her, she’s on his mother’s side but they are half-siblings. in terms of first name reasoning as well she just liked eunha as a name and didn’t even think about how it is traditionally for a female, she liked that it meant gift from heaven so it stuck. his father is still around, he’s just quite elderly so it felt like a better living situation for him to be raised primarily by his auntie. unfortunately his mother has passed on but no tragic story, she just went peacefully in old age.

he dyes his hair quite often, it’s currently like a really pastel blue with black streaks consistently throughout like lil ones so it looks super cool. but he’s also had it be a more electric blue, lilac, and a duck egg kinda faded silvery blue. it’s naturally dark brunette. has brown eyes kind of a hazel hue.

his style is kinda androgynous ig?? he just lives for soft retro fashion, lots of color in his wardrobe but also lots of tapered short and t-shirt fits frequented, sweater vests, rolled up jeans, high skater boi socks, soft jumpers with shirts, shirts in bright colours or satiny texture worn over plain white t-shirts, cardigans, pastel denim jackets, jeans with printed patterns on like clouds, flowers etc, favors yellow and blues. sometimes does eye makeup, occasionally wears heels bc he’s a baddie or super heeled boots/chunky shoes.

obsessed with music, can play violin and guitar. he’s a big mitski and rina sawayama fanatic, likes anything that sounds peaceful or calming or has like a good fun vibe to it. also likes the trademark gay icons like carly rae jepsen, lorde, etc. he’s not ashamed. obsessed with mamma mia movies. but also likes rap which is rlly funny cause its like the bad bitch female rappers only and like he’ll listen to it while arranging his sock drawer or making his bed or something ajdjdj it’s like hype anthems for being a baddie and a hoe and he’s just doing his night sleepy routine adkfkf.

showers, blankets, music, baked goods especially bagels are his happy places.

very much a sensitive lil romanticist, falls in ‘love’ like five times a day, he just likes to giggle and smile around pretty people and admire the artwork hnghdh, he’s like yeARNS though ya know?? like he’s all i will flirt by making prolonged eye contact, i made you a playlist, this song makes me think of you etc. it’s either memes as flirting with him or elaborate love letters u never know what ur gonna get akdkd.

awful sense of humour, loves his friends more than anything on earth except his pups, would fully live in a huge house of just like his pups and all his closest buds for all eternity. likes fruits way too much, enjoys puns about fruits way too much. milkshakes, sushi, orange hues and bus rides are some of his absolute favorite simple pleasures of life. clouds, flowers, salt lamps, the sunrise over the sea, skateboarding, fresh soda, teddy bears, busy street markets, parasols, fish tanks with exotic fish, sorbet, bike riding, polaroids, record players, rain at night against floor to ceiling windows with a fresh steaming pot of tea on the desk beside it and warm fresh sheets from the laundry on his bed, ponds, skateboarding. all little joys in life that give him like the biggest pleasure dopamine hit in the world.

his cousin actually owns a florists so he has flowers just littering his apartment like a lot and it just looks like he has ten million suitors from the late eighteenth century attempting to court him but no all these flowers are from him to him or worse from his aunt djfjg she sends him some for valentines every valentines, pls help him, pls send him flowers.

studies nutritional science and he fucken hates it. do not ask him shit cause he doesn’t KNOW OKAY? he doesn’t understand it either. he took it because he needed something to go alongside the passion for baking that was a real ‘qualification’/job so that is the only reason he’s doing it. no point doing a baking degree after all when he’s already a baker with a business, he’s super young still he gotta keep his prospects open. so YAH. he’d rather be doing culinary arts but eh. nutritional science sounded better and more logic based. the real miracle is he still gets top grades all the time even tho he spends his life like wtf am i even doing is this even legit akdkdk. school is the worst thing in the world for him watch his mood instantly deflate the second its brought up.

despite being a quixotic, he’s a lil afraid of intimacy. like oh god does he love it, those small touches and acts of affection u kno? the subtle things that normally go unnoticed, eye contact, brushing of hands, linking of little fingers, rubbing a thumb, kissing eyelids or foreheads or palms or shoulders in little gentle pecks, back massages and rubs or finger tracing patterns absent-minded, shoulder massages, laying your head on someone’s shoulder or on their lap, knocking knees together, exchanging a small glance only the two of you get before bursting into laughter, smiling into kisses, napping together, having blankets placed over you warm and fresh, or towels put ready like it, someone making you something they know you like a lot. that’s his sHIT. but like he’s terrified still, someone skimming their fingers on his skin makes his breath hitch like he’s a scandalized and alarmingly aroused victorian woman sjdjd. he’s literally still a virgin, he hasn’t even had his first kiss okay my baby is delicate be gentle with him akdkd but he still LIKES PASSION AIGHT kfkf.

real soft spoken, honey tinted voice like i shit u not this boy talks like he’s an angel sent from heavens above to guide you to the paradisaical garden of eden or some shit akdkd. ur gonna fall in love with eunha’s voice before u even fall in love with any other part of him like his adorable beaming smile or stunning eyes akdkf.

has dance parties around his room when getting ready in the morning, listens to bella’s lullaby unironically yes from twilight yes u heard right, bit of a himbo streak sometimes in his obliviousness djfjf. quite silently subtly funny actually much like jacob himself.

he is gay, afraid of driving, cannot do math, blanks out often and he is valid for all of those things. has a collection of cartoon and disney animal movie dvds. has a dream notebook. always has blue painted nails in some kinda shade.

does not enjoy turning in assignments bc he is scared he’ll fail, avoids looking at his grades for weeks after they’re released and hates knowing that they’re out.

cannot dance, dances often. collects vintage stuff esp clothes and mostly sweaters. likes midnight trips to corner stores and fields where he can just lay and look at the stars. makes friends rlly easily but has super bad performance anxiety. cannot ever have a messy room like even the tiniest bit messy. even like clothes being stacked on a chair instead of away.

bakes peanut butter, banana and choc chip muffins (they r called monkey bites normally) whenever he’s super stressed. if u want to cheer him up when he’s anxious or stressed then u should give him french lavender honey, chia seeds and caramelized pear on toast/bagel. it is his comfort food. he fancii when he needs a pick me up. treat urself and all that.

#dallyeog:intro #i'm literally in love with him he's the softest most goodest boi muse i have ever made and i just #im that meme of the samari sword guy with the cat in his arms akfkfk #IVE ONLY HAD EUNHA FOR TWO DAYS BUT IF ANYONE HURTS HIM I WILL KILL THEM AND THEN MYSELF AKKDK

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babysizedfics · 4 years ago

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okok so i dont know if virgil would like it (bc of the separation anxiety) but how does he feel abt peek a boo? i imagine his cgs would make it super fun! like have him on his mama’s lap with his papa in front of him and theyre like “wheres the baby??” and pat covers his eyes “there he is!!” and pat gets all happy and excited to see virgil so v gets all excited which makes pat even mOre excited so v gets lil happy kissies!!!! (can u tell ive been wanting to play peek a boo hdhdj)

I HAD TO SCREAM INTO A PILLOW

I hope you don't mind but i made this into a fic it was essential it was unavoidable i was crying as i wrote this

Title: Peekaboo!

Summary: Logan is a shy new caregiver, Patton learns what separation anxiety is, and Virgil disappears then reappears and is a very confused baby.

Word count: 6,600

Note: Set before the events of Little Accidents, Big Developments (AO3 | tumblr)

Also on AO3

oOo

It had been a somewhat slow day. Roman had been holed up in his room for most of it, rehearsing for an audition that Thomas had landed for the following week. He was working rather relentlessly, though Patton had been sure to request that he at least leave his room for mealtimes - and Logan had outright demanded it when Roman stubbornly refused. After a very speedy lunch, Roman was back in his room and the other three were left to their own devices in the living room.

Quite understandably, Patton had noticed Virgil was much antsier that afternoon. Probably because Roman was constantly talking about how absolutely essential it was that Thomas did not mess up a single line in next week’s audition and that he personally would “enter into a state of devastated mourning should this chance at stardom be killed and dashed across the stage floor”.

That had evidently sent Virgil’s anxiety into a downward spiral. After the fourth shaky sigh in as many minutes from the younger side’s lips, Patton shook his head and twisted on the couch to look at him.

‘Okay, that’s enough,’ Patton said, giving a rare stern look to the boy who was currently pacing the living room floor and looking just about ready to tear his hair out. ‘No more worrying, Stormcloud.’

‘I can’t help it!’ Virgil whispered quite fiercely. His eyes were wide and though they looked in Patton’s direction, it was as if his gaze was fixed a mile in the distance, likely imagining a variation of disastrous scenarios. ‘We could choke or trip or literally do the worst performance ever and Roman would be depressed and then we might not be able to make videos for months because he’s so distraught and what if it was all my fault? What if I was the one to make Thomas mess up and then Roman would hate me and -’

‘Breathe,’ Logan commanded from where he sat in the armchair reading a book.

As if being shaken from a spell, Virgil’s frantic pacing halted and he gasped in a breath.

‘It was not your fault because it has not happened. Roman won’t hate you because even if it did happen, the blame could not fall solely on your shoulders. Everything is going to be all right, Virgil.’

At Logan’s reassuring words, Virgil nodded slightly to himself, his eyes fixed on his feet as he took in steady, though shallow breaths.

Patton bit his lip for a moment in thought. It was obvious that Virgil would not be able to get past this anxiety without a distraction… and what better distraction than being a baby?

With a firm nod to himself that meant Yes, this is definitely the only solution. Not just because I love looking after my baby, of course, Patton switched the TV over from the show he had been watching to Guess How Much I Love You, one of Virgil’s favourite cartoons in littlespace.

As soon as the bright musical score started playing, Virgil and Logan’s gazes both snapped up to the screen. The older one smiled slightly while the younger side’s thumb flew to his mouth in an instant. He began nibbling on his nail as a young child’s voice sang the opening song:

“Dancing through springtime,

Flowers are raised in summer sun,

Catching white snowflakes on your nose,

Running through autumn leaves that float from trees from high,

With a love that is bigger than the sky”

Patton beamed at how Virgil seemed fully enraptured by the animated rabbit and bright flowers on the screen. The moral side happily joined in singing his favourite part of the song, all while gazing at Virgil.

‘Guess how much I love you, guess how much I love you -’ he held his arms out to Virgil in an invitation for a hug ‘- Guess how much I love you!’

‘’M not little,’ Virgil mumbled with a strong blush gracing his cheeks. It was so quiet that Patton wouldn’t be surprised if Logan had not been able to hear it, being slightly further away from them.

‘I know, sweetheart,’ Patton said gently through a smile, knowing that Virgil’s statement wouldn’t be true for very long. His arms remained open. ‘But maybe we can just watch a bit and see if it helps you calm down.’

There was a stiff nod and within a few seconds Virgil had plopped down onto the couch beside Patton, instantly snuggling up to him.

Patton allowed himself a small chuckle as he wrapped his arms around Virgil and pulled him into his lap. Seeing Logan’s proud smile filled him with far more joy than he was currently able to express if he didn’t want to accidentally fling Virgil off of his lap, so he let it fizzle away in his chest with a bright grin. As he settled back to watch the show, he pretended not to notice his baby’s thumb slipping into his mouth.

Needless to say, by the end of the ten-minute episode, Virgil was entirely gone.

‘Papa?’

Patton nearly squealed. He wasn’t quite over his excitement for Virgil’s new nickname for him. ‘Yes, my sweet little fieldmouse?’

‘Peas Minpy?’ Virgil garbled around his thumb, twisting his head to look pleadingly at Patton.

That look… Virgil had no idea what that look did to Patton’s heart. With a firm hand on his chest, Patton said, ‘Okay, baby. Let’s go upstairs and get Minty.’

‘I can fetch them,’ Logan quickly announced from the armchair. Patton watched as he snapped his book shut quite hurriedly, stood, paused for a second as he clearly got a head-rush from standing so fast, then made his way over to them. ‘I’m going to go and get Minty for you, Virgil,’ he explained, leaning down to be eye level with them.

His hand reached forward hesitantly and patted Virgil’s head twice, to which the regressor replied with a giggle and a poke to Logan’s wrist.

Patton fought very hard to contain an adoring smile as Logan’s cheeks flushed before he bustled out of the living room. The logical side was a little awkward in his attempts at physical affection, but they never failed to put a smile on Virgil’s face so Patton could hardly tease him about it. And it wasn’t Logan’s fault that cuddles and kisses didn’t come as naturally to him as they did to Patton. He was trying, and it only made Patton all the more smitten with him.

Feeling his cheeks warm at that thought, Patton quickly busied himself with holding Virgil’s hand (the one that was not currently glued to his chin while he sucked his thumb) and started circling his finger on the little one’s palm. ‘Round and round the garden, like a teddy bear…’

After a short while of singing and tickling and giggling, Logan returned with Minty in tow. One of Virgil’s little baby blankets was slung over his shoulder. At Patton’s raised eyebrow he shrugged it with a short explanation of: ‘Just in case he needs it.’

Virgil snatched his thumb out of his mouth with a muted pop and held his hands out to the soft toy with a whine.

‘Can you remember what word we say when we want something?’ Patton nudged Virgil slightly, though kept him in a firm embrace to make sure the boy didn’t topple off of his lap with his lack of balance.

Virgil’s face turned back to him. He opened his mouth as if ready to say something then frowned and snapped his jaw shut with a pout. Another whine came forth, this time sounding a bit upset.

‘Aww, are you too little, sweetie?’ Patton cooed. Virgil’s head suddenly collapsed onto his shoulder and he heard a sniffle. ‘No, no, it’s okay. It’s all right, baby,’ he hastened to reassure, bringing his hand up to stroke Virgil’s hair soothingly. He really was so sensitive when he was this small, it was difficult to avoid upsetting him. That was one thing that had been difficult to come to terms with when Patton first became Virgil’s caregiver. ‘You’re allowed to be as little as you want.’

The cushion beneath him dipped and he realised the sudden firm warmth pressing against his arm was Logan, who was sitting incredibly close to him. It was difficult not to blush. And so Patton did blush.

‘Virgil, look who has come to see you,’ Logan said so warmly that it melted Patton’s heart.

A curious baby pulled his face off of Patton’s shoulder and all remnants of upset on his features were quickly replaced by sheer happiness. Patton thought it would never get old, seeing Virgil’s eyes sparkle with such rare joy.

A lopsided grin stretched Logan’s lips as he pressed the stuffed dinosaur into the crook of Virgil’s arm. ‘There we are.’

The sweetest little squeak sounded as Virgil sat more upright on Patton’s lap and hugged the toy tightly, burying his face in its fur.

‘So much for not being little,’ Logan murmured lowly by Patton’s ear in an amused tone. The rumble of it resonated right through the moral side’s chest and left him dumbstruck.

‘Yeah,’ Patton breathed, not being able to think of anything much smarter to add.

oOo

Twenty minutes and a couple more episodes of Guess How Much I Love You later, Patton and Virgil (now with a pacifier) were being silly on the carpet. By being silly, they were quite literally just making funny faces at each other and then taking a minute’s break while they calmed down from all of the giggles and aching smiles than ensued.

Logan, being “not one for such tomfoolery”, was back to reading in the armchair. Though Patton had noticed that he was tending to spend more and more time on each page as he cast more and more glances over to the two on the carpet.

It was quite evident that Logan was eager to take care of Virgil, and it was becoming more prominent every day. He was incredibly passionate about the idea when he had first discussed it with Patton nearly a month previously and had been damn near ecstatic when Virgil had agreed to the suggestion. Though, going by his timidity and shy glances when Patton was caring for Virgil around him, it seemed his nerves were getting the better of him. Well, Patton couldn’t have that at all.

‘Oh, you’re such a silly baby!’ Patton chuckled when Virgil scrunched up his face as if he had eaten a lemon slice. ‘Papa’s gonna be right back, sweetheart.’

Without much delay, Patton jumped up with a big smile and ruffled Virgil’s hair, only just noticing that his face had fallen as he walked away. He would be fine, especially with Logan looking after him.

‘Where are you going?!’ Logan practically shrieked, his eyes wide and staring at Patton in disbelief.

Patton couldn’t help but giggle. ‘I’m just going to pee. You can watch Virgil while I’m gone!’ he cried a bit too excitedly if the look of suspicion on Logan’s face was anything to go by. ‘Come on, Lo. You are his other caregiver, aren’t you?’

That seemed to humble Logan as he looked to his lap and fidgeted with his tie. ‘Yes, I - of course.’

As Patton moved out into the hallway he heard Logan sliding off of his chair and talking to Virgil in quiet, gentle tones. He smiled, knowing that Logan truly did have it in him to be a carer, he just needed some encouragement.

Within mere minutes Patton was on his way back to the living room. If he took his bathroom trip quite languidly and chose to use the upstairs bathroom just to have a longer journey, he was sure no-one would have noticed. It was all for a good cause, after all. Though, he began to doubt this reasoning when he became aware of wet sniffles and whimpers and frantic hushes coming from the living room.

‘Logan, is everything okay?’ Patton asked as he pushed the door open.

He was met with the sight of a red-faced, tear-stained Virgil pulling very harshly on his pacifier handle. Logan was knelt beside him, holding his hands out in a placating gesture and looking quite concerned.

It only took a second or so for Patton to drop by Virgil’s side and immediately wrap him in a warm hug. The younger’s crying slowed as he buried his face in Patton’s chest.

‘What happened?’ Patton whispered, looking up at Logan’s bewildered stare.

‘He started crying the minute you left,’ Logan said, his brow furrowed (beautifully), ‘but I could not find any indication of injury or anything in the vicinity that might have caused such a sudden drop in mood.’

‘Oh, sweetheart,’ Patton murmured sadly as he gazed upon his curled up baby, suddenly understanding. He lifted Virgil slightly to bring him into his lap. ‘It’s okay, Lo. Sometimes he does that when I leave him for a bit.’

Just as with every time previously, Virgil’s tears had completely subsided now that he was in Patton’s embrace. Rather than whimpers and sniffles, the only sounds coming from him were the suckling of his pacifier and a small sigh of content.

Logan seemed thrown off by the sudden change. ‘He cries when you leave the room? Is there no suggestion that he could be upset by extraneous variables in these situations?’

‘I don’t know much about “ex-trainer vary balls” but nothing else happens to make him cry.’ Patton tightened his hold around Virgil protectively. ‘He just misses his papa.’

The way Logan’s frown pulled down even more was slightly less cute this time, only because it made Patton worry.

‘Patton, I don’t believe this qualifies as “just missing his papa”. This may be a case of separation anxiety.’

Even as his baby snuggled into him further, Patton felt his heart sink. ‘That doesn’t sound very nice. What is it?’

‘In short, it means that he is aware enough to realise just how dependent he is on you, but not in an old enough headspace to have a solid understanding of object permanence.’ Patton’s confusion must have shown on his face because Logan immediately elaborated, ‘When something leaves his line of sight, he believes it has ceased to exist.’

‘Oh, that can’t be right.’ Patton looked down at the sleepy boy in his lap. ‘No, he must know I’m still gonna come back to him. I always come back to him.’ Purple tendrils of hair parted around his fingertips as he stroked his little one’s head.

‘Allow me to demonstrate,’ Logan said, then picked Minty up from where they had apparently been abandoned on the carpet. ‘Virgil,’ he called, ‘Vee, look over here. Look at Minty.’

With a little snuffle, Virgil lifted his head from Patton’s shoulder. It was noticeable how his eyes sparkled upon seeing his favourite toy. ‘Minpy!’ he squealed in excitement.

‘Aww,’ Patton cooed, unable to hide his adoration for just how sweet his little boy was.

‘Don’t you think he was surprised to see Minty?’ Logan questioned, holding Minty just out of reach from Virgil who was starting to whine as he held his arm out to the toy.

‘Well… I guess so, but that doesn’t mean -’

Minty was suddenly pulled away and hidden behind Logan’s back, completely out of sight. An expression of fake-surprise crossed Logan’s features as he looked at Virgil. ‘Where did Minty go, Vee?’

Watching Virgil’s reaction, Patton was beginning to understand what Logan meant. A mild panic had clouded over Virgil’s eyes and he looked frantically between Patton’s face and Logan’s now empty hand. It wasn’t long before the whimpering started anew.

‘Sweetie, it’s okay,’ Patton murmured, rocking him slightly on his lap. ‘You remember where Minty went, don’t you?’

Wet eyes locked onto his. ‘Gom,’ Virgil whispered forlornly.

‘He’s not gone, baby. See.’ Patton sent a pointed look to Logan, to which the logical side at least had the decency to appear embarrassed by his experiment and pulled Minty back out from behind him.

Virgil gasped through his pacifier, apparently shocked by the toy’s sudden reappearance. He whined and made desperate grabby hands at the toy.

‘There you go, Virgil.’ The toy was pushed into Virgil’s hands and instantly squeezed against his chest in a tight hug. Logan looked back up to Patton a little shyly. ‘I apologise for upsetting him. I had to prove my hypothesis.’

A sigh escaped Patton as he swayed his baby gently. Logan did honestly look remorseful, and he had shown Patton what object permanence was (or more what it wasn’t) so perhaps it was all right. Even if it hadn’t been in a very fun way. ‘So, does he think I… I die when I leave the room?’ he whispered shakily.

‘Not nearly so morbid,’ Logan reassured, actually reaching out to stroke his finger across Virgil’s knuckle. It was a very small act of affection, but Patton appreciated it nonetheless. ‘He does not have the mental capacity to think about anything that he cannot see. When you leave him, he cannot see you and so all he can think about at that moment is your absence, rather than believe you could exist somewhere that is not with him.’

The strangest bittersweet feeling swirled in Patton’s chest. Sure, it was kind of cute that Virgil loved and needed his papa so much that he always wanted to be with him. But Patton couldn’t be with him all the time. He did his best, of course, but he couldn’t exactly go hours without needing to go to the bathroom or fetching something from the cupboard.

‘Can we maybe fix it?’ Patton asked.

That crinkle in between Logan’s eyebrows came forth again and Patton longed to press his lips against it and smooth it out with a kiss. ‘There are simple activities we can do to try to reinforce object permanence. Though given the fact that he is not truly a developing child, I am unsure if they will have any effect on him.’

‘It’s worth a try though, right?’ Patton didn’t want his baby to be needlessly upset if they could help it.

A soft smile stretched Logan’s lips, and it made it quite tricky to remain worried. ‘It’s worth a try.’

And try they did. They really did.

As per Logan’s suggestion, they started with Patton leaving the room for progressively longer bouts of time. Thirty seconds, then one minute, then two minutes, and et cetera. At least, that had been the plan. In practice, it was much more resemblant of ten seconds, Virgil’s distressed whimpering, and Patton dashing back to comfort his baby. Then ten seconds, then Virgil whimpering, then Patton dashing. Ten seconds, whimpering, dashing. All in all, they considered it a failed attempt. (Patton was very glad that Logan didn’t reprimand him for ruining the experiment.) (‘You didn’t ruin anything, Patton.’)

The next activity was hiding objects and showing Virgil that they would always be revealed again. Minty had been the first choice, though Virgil was still rather distressed from their first activity and was clinging onto the toy tightly. The caregivers came to a silent agreement that it would not be fair to take away his comfort item. They instead attempted to hide things from around the room; little trinkets such as a photo frame or one of Roman’s sketchpads he had left lying around.

Virgil at least did not start crying whenever they were hidden behind Logan’s back or under his baby blanket. In fact, he hardly seemed to notice them disappear at all. No matter how much baby-talk and coaxing from Patton and Logan, the regressor did not react to them and only frowned and buried his head against Patton’s chest with a whine that almost resembled a groan of annoyance. Apparently he was entirely uninterested in the activity when it concerned such boring objects.

‘Virgil, look. Roman’s drawings are all gone,’ Logan announced, pulling the blankie over the sketchpad for the fourth time. Patton felt Virgil’s head roll on his chest lazily to look. ‘And now -’ Logan pulled the blanket back with a little gasp, revealing the book, ‘- there they are, they came back!’

‘Wow, would you look at that!’ Patton gasped, shaking Virgil very gently to try to excite him.

A soft grunt sounded before Virgil buried his pouting face in Minty’s tummy.

Both caregivers sighed.

‘Perhaps this activity is too impersonal to interest him,’ Logan mumbled, looking more than a little disheartened.

It wasn’t a surprise, given how passionate Logan was about educational activities. Despite the logical side’s hesitance with being solely responsible for a regressed Virgil, he had displayed plenty of interest in the boy’s wellbeing. Over the past few weeks wherein he had been subject to Virgil’s regression, Logan had had plenty of input in ways Patton could play with him and similarly teach him things that his regressed self had not known before. Patton, in turn, had convinced Logan that he himself partake in the activities too, and hence Virgil’s comfort around him had been gradually growing.

So seeing how disappointed Logan was by Virgil despondence for this activity, Patton absolutely had to do something to remedy it. He just had a fussy baby to get through first.

‘Oh no!’ Patton cried, knowing that it would be enough to get Virgil’s attention. As expected, the baby looked up from his toy still adorning a frown as he suckled his pacifier. ‘Vee, I’ve lost something very important and I can’t find it!’

Virgil’s grumpy expression melted into a worried one and he looked over to Logan. Then he pointed at the other side and whined at Patton.

A giggle worked its way through Patton’s words as he explained, ‘No, I didn’t lose Logan. I can’t find my happy little baby anywhere!’

Shyness replaced Virgil’s confusion as Minty was pulled up to cover most of his face.

‘Is he…’ Patton hummed in thought for a moment, then fluttered his finger under Virgil’s ear, ‘over here?’

A little squeak was muffled behind Minty as Virgil’s eyes crinkled. But, Patton thought in amusement, he still couldn’t see Virgil’s smile, so technically it didn’t count.

‘No?’ Patton gasped, then moved his finger down to wiggle over the sole of Virgil’s socked foot. ‘Is he under there?’

With a strained giggle, Virgil dropped Minty to push at Patton’s hand quite weakly. His dimples were starting to show.

Biting his lip around a grin, Patton released Virgil’s foot but then started circling his finger around in midair teasingly. ‘Oh, I wonder where my happy little one could be.’

‘Papa!’ Virgil called, giggling around his pacifier.

‘Oh my, I think I heard him!’ Patton’s finger started wriggling and moving towards Virgil’s tummy. ‘Could he be in here?’

He slid his finger under Virgil’s shirt and started squiggling over his tummy. Virgil was immediately squirming in his lap, giggling uncontrollably.

‘There’s my happy baby!’ Patton laughed.

For another couple of moments, the room was filled with the sounds of Virgil’s bright laughter and the soft kicks of his feet against the carpet. Then Logan spoke up:

‘Actually, this poses another suggestion.’

Patton twisted in his place, keeping a firm hold on Virgil who was still calming from his giggles. At some point during the tickle attack, Logan had apparently moved back to the armchair. While he was sitting quite stiffly and avoiding Patton’s eyes, there was a slight twist in his lips that suggested he was holding back a smile.

‘What’s that, Loganberry?’

A half-hearted scoff greeted that nickname, though Logan continued regardless. ‘Playing Where’s the baby? - otherwise referred to as Peekaboo - is a commonly used tactic in teaching object permanence in infants.’

‘Oh, how adorable!’ At once, Patton shuffled both him and Virgil to face Logan on the carpet, supporting Virgil in sitting upright. He was eagerly peering over Virgil’s head at Logan. Patton wouldn’t miss this for the world! ‘Whenever you’re ready.’

Logan bridled in his seat a little. ‘I, um… Well, I anticipated that you would want to do it, Patton.’

‘Oh.’ The slump of Patton’s shoulders was probably more noticeable than he would have liked. Was he asking too much of Logan to play a game like that with their baby? The logical side has always been sensitive to looking less than serious. ‘Of course,’ Patton nodded, regretting that his voice sounded strained.

‘Wait, no. I -’ The words stuttered to a halt as Logan closed his eyes and took a deep, likely steadying breath. When his eyes opened again, he looked down at Virgil with a soft, open expression. ‘Shall we play a game, Vee?’

Pride swelled in Patton’s chest.

The weight on his lap shifted as Virgil turned around to look at him. His expression wasn’t too easily read, but Patton knew he was simply seeking affirmation and so he encouraged him. ‘That’ll be fun, won’t it, baby?’

Seemingly satisfied, Virgil turned back to Logan and made a hum of assent.

It would never be spoken aloud, but Patton was quite sure that both he and Logan acknowledged just how awkward the logical side felt in that moment.

With a quiet clearing of his throat, Logan lifted the baby blanket from the floor and held it up in the air in front of him, concealing his face. After a moment, the fabric dropped to his feet to reveal Logan’s face - adorned with a faint blush.

‘Peekaboo,’ he said in an incredibly unfitting monotone.

A wince fought to crumple Patton’s face, but he battled it fiercely. As was to be expected, Virgil did not react much to Logan’s weak exclamation.

‘That did not have the desired effect,’ Logan grumbled, his cheeks a deep shade of pink now.

‘Aw, come on. Maybe you could try again with a bit more, y’know,’ Patton stalled, shrugging his shoulders with a guilty smile, ‘feeling.’

Logan’s eyes darted between Patton’s face, the blanket on the floor, and Virgil. Then he shook his head rapidly and muttered to his lap, ‘This was a silly suggestion. Forgive me.’

Being overcome by a wave of sympathy, Patton offered, ‘Here, why don’t we switch?’

He gripped Virgil tightly and rose from the floor with his baby in his arms. Virgil only had the chance to whine for half a second (he didn’t respond too well to being picked up a lot of the time) before Patton was easing him into Logan’s lap.

‘Uh, Pat - Patton…’ Logan stuttered, going stiff in his seat.

Ignoring the nervous protest, Patton persisted and situated Virgil further back on Logan’s lap so that the regressor leant against Logan’s chest. ‘There we are, sweetheart.’

It was met with a high-pitched whine and one of Virgil’s hands reaching out to him again as he leant forward to chase his papa.

Logan quickly caught Virgil’s shoulders before the boy swayed too far to one side. ‘Are you certain this is all right?’ he asked quite breathlessly. ‘I haven’t held him before, I don’t -’

‘Logan, don’t worry.’ It was almost amusing how wide Logan’s eyes were. Patton sent both of his boys the most comforting smile he had to offer. ‘I’m sure Mommy Logan is plenty capable of holding a baby in his lap.’

Both sides on the couch spoke simultaneously:

‘“Mommy Logan”?’

‘Mama?’

Virgil’s tiny voice filled Patton with such intense awe, he could hardly breathe past the swell of adoration in his chest.

He just smiled and with each hand offered a supportive touch to the two on the couch - a hair stroke for Virgil and a shoulder squeeze for Logan. He directed his next words at Virgil, knowing Logan wouldn’t be able to argue with his baby-talk. ‘Yes, baby. You’ve got a papa already, haven’t you? So now you’ve got a mama too!’

In a somewhat unexpected change of heart, Virgil’s upset at being away from his papa dissipated and he sank back against Logan’s chest quite happily.

Logan’s arms had fallen forward to secure around Virgil much in the same fashion as a seatbelt.

The decision to be so unapologetic and forward about suggesting “Mommy Logan” had been a risky one on Patton’s behalf, though seeing the gentle smile that softened Logan’s face thwarted any lingering doubts he had harboured about it.

‘I suppose that makes sense,’ Logan murmured, absently stroking his thumb over Virgil's shoulder and gazing down at him as if in a trance. ‘I can be Mama Logan.’

Going by Logan’s expression, Patton was sure he recognised the feeling that lay behind it. Patton knew it well; being entranced by the vulnerability and innocence and sweetness of the person who now relied on you to take care of them. It was the feeling of protectiveness. The paternal instinct. It was love.

He did his best not to tear up at seeing it displayed so openly in Logan’s eyes.

‘Okay, baby, are we ready to play?’ His happy tone was only moderately hindered by his tearfulness.

Virgil bounced a little in Logan’s lap (which earned him a surprised chuckle from the logical side) and nodded, squeezing Minty tighter in his hands.

‘Here we go!’ Patton announced, then leaned forward. He covered Virgil’s eyes with the palms of his hands. The confused squeak from Virgil forced Patton to bite his lip to conceal a giggle. After a couple of seconds, he lowered his hands and with a bright smile. ‘Peekaboo!’

There was certainly more of a reaction in comparison to Logan’s monotonous attempt, though it was not exactly the expected one. Where Patton expected to find an excited glimmer in Virgil’s eyes, he only saw confusion and upset.

Undeterred, Patton simply laughed it off. ‘There you are! And now…’ He covered Virgil’s eyes again, slightly concerned at his small whimper. When he lowered his hands and called, ‘Peekaboo!’ again, Virgil outright pouted at him.

‘What’s the matter, baby?’

‘I think he may have sensory issues with you covering his eyes,’ Logan suggested gently.

Patton observed how Virgil had instantly started rubbing at his eyes once Patton’s hands had pulled away from them. ‘Was it a yucky feeling, Vee?’ he asked.

A little nod and whine from the regressor confirmed the suspicion.

‘Aw, honey, I’m sorry,’ Patton cooed, feeling his heart sink with guilt. He had to remind himself to be careful of Virgil’s sensitivities. It was certainly proving to be a learning curve for the touchy-feely father figure.

Logan seemed to have regained some of his usual confidence and spoke without an ounce of hesitation, ‘I suggest you attempt it with his blanket instead.’

Glad for Logan’s to-the-point problem solving, Patton picked the blankie up. The material was unfathomably soft and always calmed Virgil down after he had been subjected to “yucky” textures, so he was sure it would help with their game.

‘All right, let’s try this again. Ready?’ Patton held the blanket taut and dropped it over Virgil’s head. An even louder whimper this time sounded from underneath it and Patton shared a concerned glance with Logan.

‘Papa!’ Virgil called out in panic. His grip on Minty was tight enough that the soft toy bulged between his fingers.

Patton hurriedly lifted the blanket again, ready to exclaim “peekaboo”, but was heartbroken to see Virgil’s eyes glossed over with tears.

Virgil whined as soon as he seemed to notice Patton. He dropped Minty to Logan’s lap so that he could hold his arms out. ‘Papa,’ he whispered, sounding close to tears.

‘Hey, hey, don’t cry, baby,’ Patton soothed, wrapping Virgil in a quick hug (that just so happened to include Logan, seeing as how he was so close behind Virgil). ‘It’s all right, Papa’s here.’

‘This separation anxiety is far more intense than I initially thought.’ Logan sounded troubled.

It made Patton’s stomach flip. Would Logan want to test it more? Would he say it was bad for Virgil’s mental health? Would he want to separate Patton and Virgil? A sick feeling surged through Patton and he quickly plastered a big grin on his face, pulling back from Virgil despite his baby’s reluctance to let go.

‘No, no, we can do this,’ he assured. ‘Can’t we baby?’

Virgil didn’t seem to know what Patton was asking him, so he only whined and stretched his arms out further towards Patton.

‘It may help if you speak while he is hidden,’ Logan whispered. ‘That way he will still sense your presence.’ He offered a slightly awkward smile. It was beautiful to Patton.

He picked the blanket back up from where he had dropped it to the couch and, as per Logan’s instruction, repeated the game but this time spoke when Virgil was covered by the blanket.

More whines met his ears, though Patton quickly gasped and said, ‘Uh oh, I can’t see little Vee anywhere!’

To his relief (as well as Logan’s, going by the drop of his tense shoulders), Virgil’s whimpering stopped.

‘Papa?’

‘Where’s the baby?’ Patton sang.

A confused coo came from Virgil. It was such an unmistakably babyish sound that the remains of Patton’s concern were overridden by thoughts of My baby is so frickin’ adorable!

Then he snatched the blanket from Virgil’s head with a wide smile. ‘There he is!’

Virgil blinked slowly a couple of times before twisting around to look up at Logan.

The logical side smiled down at him and nodded. ‘You came back,’ he stated simply.

For a moment Patton was unsure of what would happen next. Virgil’s silence could have meant anything from shyness to fear. It could have been followed up by hysterical giggles or heartbreaking sobs.

Instead, Virgil turned back to Patton and mumbled, ‘Bwankie.’

How on Earth Patton had not yet suffered a heart attack from the sheer amount of adorableness coming from his baby, he had no idea.

‘Shall we play with your blankie again?’ Patton asked.

When Virgil nodded, so much pride and happiness filled Patton that it spilt out of him in a joyful giggle.

‘Oh my gosh, okay!’ He bounced on his toes as he lay the blanket over Virgil’s head again. His baby did go slightly rigid upon being left in darkness, but it was quickly remedied: ‘Where’s my little baby?’

Virgil’s body relaxed back into Logan and he shook Mento in his hands with a squeak. With a strong suspicion that his little boy was excited, Patton pulled the blankie away. ‘There he is!’

And it was true! Virgil was smiling behind his paci and flapped Mento in the air in front of him with a giggle. The anxiousness of the previous few minutes had completely disappeared.

‘Logan, he liked it!’ Patton cried, unable to contain how ecstatic he was.

He was a little surprised to catch Logan staring at him with a distant look and a soft smile etched onto his features. With a little start, Logan seemed to catch himself and nodded stiffly.

‘I am glad,’ Logan said and with the hand that wasn’t keeping Virgil secure, he scratched at his cheek. It only drew attention to how rosy it had become. ‘It might be worth keeping it up. Solely for the educational merits, of course,’ he hastened to add.

‘You don’t have to tell me twice,’ Patton laughed and looked back at his baby. ‘Again?’

Virgil bounced a little in Logan’s lap and his dimples sunk in his cheeks. ‘Gen!’

‘Anything for my little stormcloud.’

Virgil was promptly hidden behind the fluffy material.

‘Oh dear, where did Virgil go?’

The blanket giggled.

Logan chuckled quietly as Patton winked at him. ‘Where’s my itty bitty baby?’

‘Papa, Papa!’

Patton gasped with an exaggerated surprise, ‘Oh my goodness…’ He swept the blanket off of Virgil's head to be met with a very happy baby with fluffed up hair. ‘There he is!’

The sound that came from Virgil could only have been described as a squeal of delight. His face was glowing with joy and he squished Minty against his face. He tended to do that when he was either shy (which he certainly wasn’t at that moment) or when he was so overwhelmed by emotion that he had to hide and process it for a moment. The fact that he was hiding from intense joy, rather than intense fear as usual, was nothing short of heartwarming to Patton.

‘I love you, honey,’ he whispered and leaned down to press a firm kiss onto the top of Virgil’s head.

‘Um, Patton?’ Logan asked quietly.

With a growing embarrassment, Patton realised he had his hands on Logan’s thighs to steady himself in leaning forward. He quickly retracted his hands. ‘Sorry.’

‘No, no, that wasn’t - you can -’ Logan cut himself off by clearing his throat. His eyes darted up to Patton quite hesitantly before they settled on Virgil. His hold on the regressor visibly tightened. ‘I wondered if perhaps I could try playing again.’

Patton had not, in fact, known true pride until that very moment.

‘Gosh, yes, please, of course,’ Patton rambled, instantly crouching down to be eye-level with Virgil. He had to seize this window of opportunity lest Logan shy away. ‘Let’s move you around, sweetheart.’

With a little help from Logan (and a little blushing as Patton’s hand brushed his), they were able to get Virgil to face Logan whilst in his lap. There was only a slight protest when Virgil reached out to hug Patton but couldn’t because of his position, but it was soon brushed over when Patton sat beside Logan so that Virgil could clearly see him. Perhaps the separation anxiety had not been helped so much by the game, but it was fun nonetheless.

‘We’re gonna play with Mama now,’ Patton announced and smiled when Virgil looked expectantly at Logan.

The logical side faltered a bit, though as Patton nudged him slightly with his shoulder he seemed to come out of it. ‘Are you ready to play, Vee?’

The baby nodded and hugged Minty tightly to his chest.

Logan did as Patton had - covering Virgil over with the blanket and immediately wondering aloud, ‘I appear to have lost Virgil. Wherever could he be?’

To Logan’s credit, the performance was far more expressive than his first attempt. It wasn’t quite as resemblant of a children’s TV presenter as Patton’s coos and gasps were, but it was certainly enough to get Virgil smiling, as was quickly revealed when Logan pulled the blanket back with a joyful, ‘There he is!’

They kept at the game for several more minutes, none of them getting bored of the repetition.

It was quite difficult to be bored by Virgil’s squeaky giggles, Patton found. Especially when they were supplemented by Logan’s soothing voice and a grin brighter than Patton knew the logical side would have ever dared to display in any other situation.

By the last round, Virgil was getting sleepy; his laughter was interrupted by quiet yawns (which sent Patton’s heart racing as he questioned how a human being could so closely resemble a kitten).

‘Last one, Stormcloud,’ Patton chuckled as Logan covered the boy with the blanket once more. ‘Then it’s naptime.’

‘Where’s Virgil?’ Logan called. ‘Where’s the baby?’

Virgil’s giggles were quiet, and it was noticeable how he was swaying a lot more now, being too tired to support himself. It was a good thing that Logan refused to release him from his careful hold.

Patton had shuffled further toward the other two as the game went on and now he was fully leaning up against Logan’s side. When they both looked at each other with bright smiles, Patton actually dared to wonder whether Logan’s cheeks really were just flushed from all the laughter, or if maybe Patton wasn’t alone in feeling a spark where their arms touched.

‘Together?’ Logan suggested.

Patton was sure his smile was completely goofy by this point, but he hardly cared.

‘Three…’

Logan smiled. ‘Two…’

‘One…’ Patton pulled the blanket from Virgil’s head.

‘Peekaboo!’ the caregivers said in unison, their happy, sing-song tones identical.

oOo

AO3 link

Reblogs, likes, and comments are greatly appreciated! ♡

#thank you so so so much for sending this little headcanon #as you can see i really liked it!!#little/big asides #little/big series fics #little/big series #agere virgil #little virgil #cg logan #cg patton #requests #💚 anon

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meowchela · 4 years ago

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Introduction to Salem (my deltarune oc)

because i really wanna post about her hsdgjshbdsfhj

info under the cut bc this is gonna be long as FUCK I have a lot to say about my daughter...please read it tho

first things first, her name is Salem and I first made her on my second run of deltarune when I decided to name my vessel properly (on my first run i made the vessel’s name my own since the instructions confused me a tad, haha.)

this is what she looks like in-game. here’s a sprite recreation of the above sprite cuz its kinda unclear (plus a pixel vers)

I didn’t flesh her out until may 2020 though, and since then she’s gone through all sortsa development. the first thing I did was try to make her design stand out from being a basic vessel while still keeping true to the nature of it, if that makes sense.

this is my first ever drawings of her- some minor things have changed as i’ve drawn her. here’s her current design!

as well as her sprite (plus the pixel vers)

she has a dark world form and a “beta” design (aka her in-game design just with a face) but I've shown enough designs for now.

Her backstory is that, after being discarded, she was saved and brought to life by Gaster. He acts as her father figure (she literally calls him father, since in a way he is bc bringing her to life and all that) and she holds him in very high regard. They live together in the void, however Salem can leave and I’m going to explain why in a bit.

Her purpose as a vessel is to house the player’s soul. That purpose was taken from her at the beginning of the game as we all know, and she’s determined to get it back by any means necessary. How she does this is she basically goes down to hometown and/or the dark world to antagonize/attack Kris to get the soul out of them. She hates them for this reason.

Of course, she’s more like a saturday morning cartoon villain than an actual threat to them. She tries her hardest but can never really get their soul. She keeps trying though. The only thing that could divert her from attempting to fulfill her purpose would have to be a genuine change of heart.

Personalitywise, She’s actually very proper and polite to people she’s not actively trying to steal the soul of. Gaster raised her with proper manners! Despite this, she’s also very sassy and not afraid to speak her mind. Also shes not above saying swear words because I think its funny lmao

Her powers are as follows:

Teleportation - Allows her to get to and from the void. she can teleport to places she knows, but not people, and she can teleport small items with her if she’s holding them but not other people, hence why Gaster can’t use her to escape.

Hovering - Salem can hover a few feet off the ground for a limited amount of time. It’s not exactly flight, since it’s loosely derived from Gaster’s ability to control his detached hands (technically a form of hovering). It’s more just so she can look intimidating and cool. Originally, she didn’t have this, but one day I sprite edited a pose that looked like she was hovering and decided it would be cool lmao

Gaster Blasters- Since they’re named after her dad, I figured I’d give them to her. However, I’ve been debating recently on whether to keep them or not, since I don’t want her being too similar to Sans power-wise and he’s the only place in the game we see them. It’s iffy for now, so we’ll see.

Fun facts!

She has a wrench she uses as her main weapon. I tend to forget this fact, but it’s very important. (If I do get rid of the blaster power, she’d use this as primarily, since right now she prefers to use the blasters as a ranged attack. That said she does love to bonk people w the wrench, namely Kris she hits them with it a lot)

Physically, she is the same age as the fun gang (Since I headcanon Kris, Susie, and Ralsei to be 17, she would be 17 as well, however if you headcanon them to be younger she’s essentially just aged to match them. At the very least her and Kris are always physically the same age.) Mentally, though, it’s kinda complicated. She’s as smart as her physical age in the sense she’s able to use logic and wit, however her knowledge of the world is less than a toddlers. If you asked her what something normal like, say, grass was, she would not know. She would be confused as fuck. She could best someone at chess but the second you ask her what a movie theatre is she becomes all questions

She’s naturally very curious. Maybe because she has so little knowledge of the world or maybe because she was raised by Gaster to have a scientific mind, but she just wants to know EVERYTHING about the world around her. When she’s not focused on antagonizing Kris and their friends all the time, she’s usually out exploring and studying things, trying to expand her knowledge.

Gaster forgot if he taught her how to read and write or not and at this point he’s too afraid to find out.

In truth, Gaster’s better at being a scientist than a dad. He tries to act fatherly towards Salem but most of the time ends up treating her more like a lab assistant. She doesn’t mind as long as he pays attention to her, but it’s still not exactly good for her development.

I headcanon Gaster is ambiguously related to the skelebros, so by extension Salem is related to them as well. He’s told her to respect them. (She gets along with Papyrus, but Sans gets on her nerves sometimes.)

I think I’ve rambled on enough. There’s still so much more to cover but this is all of the basic info and then some. Thank you for reading this far, and if you have any questions or comments about her PLEASE feel free to shoot me an ask about it.

#shut up meow #salem #meows ocs #meows art #meows sprite edits #please ask me questions about her via ask #i could talk about her for ages #also now that ive properly introduced her i will post about her #A LOT #so uh #hope u like deltarune vessel ocs lmao

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dipshithqs · 5 years ago

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☠ ◞ ashton moio . 23 . cismale . he/him . › is that rocco mena i see walking through the campgrounds ? i can’t believe that the sagittarius is spending their summer here . i heard that MOUSE is a pizza delivery boy when they’re at home in chandler , arizona . but while they’re here , i’ve seen them stuffing his face while humming all night longer by sammy adams . i’ve called them the village idiot but that’s only because of their PLAYFUL and DIMWITTED tendencies . apparently , they’re back at camp silver lake this year because he missed the place . ‹ played by t , he/they , 18+ , mst . ›

INTRODUCTION

name. rocco age. 23 birthday. 11/23 sexuality. heterosexual

EXTENDED

full name. rocco spencer mena pronunciation. ROCK-oh SPEHN-suhr meh-NUH meaning of name. “rest” aliases. mouse, ,rocky, roc gender. cismale pronouns. he/him species. human zodiac sign. sagittarius hometown. chandler, arizona occupation. pizza delivery boy/camp counselor label. the village idiot faceclaim. ashton moio

RUNDOWN

🍕 a Very Dumb™ 🍕 obsessed w/ rap/hip-hop and constantly tries to write his own songs 🍕 super bad at writing but actually a decent rapper 🍕 generally liked by the kids ,, , mostly bc they can get away w/ a lotta shit w/ him 🍕 pinterest board 🍕 has been a pizza delivery boy fr 3 years 🍕 was a clerk n a babysitter before that 🍕 never taken seriously 🍕 loves energy drinks 🍕 still lives w/ his parents 🍕 developed a panic disorder n started getting panic attacks at 13 ,, , after his first run at camp silver lake 🍕 Would Rather Be Sleeping 🍕 bit of a momma’s boy 🍕 spotify playlist 🍕 a Good Choice if all you wanna do is sit around n eat cheetos all day 🍕 been skateboarding since he was 9 🍕 was close friends w/ 3 out of the 10 kids that disappeared 🍕 parties like a frat boy

QUESTIONS

why are they labeled as the trope that you applied for ? remember that kid in class that used to sit at the table during arts and crafts time just eating glue and putting stickers on his face ? that was mouse ... . ... and he hasn’t changed, ,,,he’s labeled the village idiot ‘cause homeboy is dumb as dirt ! !!!!!!!!! !!!!!!! !! a safety hazard. w/ the kinda luck he has too,,, he’d end up getting someone else ( along with himself ) killed ,,, fortunately, , where he lacks intelligence ... . n luck ,, , he makes up for in friendliness who are some of their character inspirations ? ( bonus points if you list some horror movie or television show characters ) gOd i wish i had more characters frm horror movies/tv but highkey philip j. fry from futurama, , a dash of charlie kelly from it’s always sunny in philidelpha,, touch of michael kelso from that ‘70s show minus the narcissism ( tho mouse has his moments ), ,,,, , andy dwyer from parks and recreation ,, , lowkey xander harris from buffy the vampire slayer do you think they’d run into danger or run away from it ? it depends tbh, ,,but probably run away , ,, like 93% of the time he’d run away what are the worst parts of their personality ? o god he is so. .. .. .. .. .. .... ..... ..so dumb, ,,fatally dumb, ,, , keep-your-distance dumb,, ,, actually making him annoying at times ( especially in serious situations ) ,, , n he can b V lazy so asking him to do. .. ... Anything .. ... can b such a Chore, ,, this makes him appear selfish at times,,, as well what are some connections that they would have formed at camp the first time they were around ? his main focus would’ve probably been the boys at camp the first go around, ,, since he was just set on having fun w/ a group a friends n girls just seemed Annoying at the time,,, , so BROS !!!!!! [ insert me and the boys meme here ] there’s a possibility he’d gotten a hardcore crush at camp the second go around ( at 14 ) tho are they nervous about returning back to camp silver lake ? why or why not ? noooooo he is v much Excited to b returning,, , thanks to his good ol’ ‘ subconsiously blocking out tramatic experiences ’ method ,, ,albeit ... .. . he didn’t expect to come back ,, , but couldn’t resist what’s their favorite scary movie ? so hard !!!! he’s def more into comedy or cartoons than scary or gore but he can b down fr a good funny horror ,, ,,, probably tucker and dale vs evil finally, what are some connections you’d like for them to have ? ( please list a minimum of three ) would fckn Love something along the lines of those two guys/heterosexual life-partners (shaggy/scooby, jay/silent bob, monty/jasper, etc) pLease ,,, might b pushing it but maybe something like cloudcuckoolander’s minder ?? listen .. ... ... ..he’s gonna die Quick w/o a smack whenever he tries to do smthn stupid (n thts all th time fjds),, !!! just friends !!! r smthin like it,, , def can see him crushing on someone, ,trying to hit on ‘em,,, , pulling out those cheesy pick up lines n they just Do Not Want , ,,,, ,lbh he’s not bf material, ,, ,, ok but i'm down fr aaannnnyyyytttthhhiinnngggg tho honstly it’s cool to just come up w somethin on the fly, ,, pLS HMU !!!!!!!

APPEARANCE

height. 5′8″ weight. 138 lbs eyes. brown hair. dark brown race. hispanic/latino nationality. american complexion. beige build. scrawny voice. x scent. cheese dust,, fruity pebbles, ,,body spray

RELATIONSHIPS

parents. donté + maría siblings. jamie children. none enemies. none ( that he knows of )

MENTAL

education. high school languages. english, spanish disorders. panic disorder habits. eating 'til he passes out, ,taking looooong ass naps ,, ,playing on his skateboard in the cabins ,, ignoring his general duties as a councellor/steering the kids off course

TRAITS

positive. optimistic, supportive, playful, tenderhearted, easygoing negative. lazy, dimwitted, self-indulgent, immature, careless

CHARACTERIZATION

moral alignment. neutral good jung. enfp-a enneagram. the peacemaker four temperaments. phlegmatic tropes. crying wolf, the ditz, buffy speak, dumb is good, too dumb to live, kindhearted simpleton, casanova wannabe, manchild, butt-monkey, the slacker, know-nothing know-it-all, fun personified, extreme omnivore, cloudcuckoolander, adorkable, unfazed everyman, innocently insensitive archetypes. the performer, the caregiver, the rebel aura. red tarot card. the sun

ATTRIBUTES

strength. 3/10 dexterity. 4/10 magic. 0/10 cunning. 2/10 willpower. 4/10 constitution. 8/10

INTELLECT

musical-rhythmic intelligence. 6/10 visual-spatial intelligence. 2/10 verbal-linguistic intelligence. 3/10 logical-mathematical intelligence. 1/10 bodily-kinesthetic intelligence. 3/10 interpersonal intelligence. 6/10 intrapersonal intelligence. 5/10 existential intelligence. 6/10 naturalistic intelligence. 2/10

#slasher.intro #( this is all tf over the place )

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evilkitten3 · 3 years ago

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see, the thing is, slapstick can be hilarious. there’s a reason it’s been around for so long - i remember seeing a play with my mom and little brother when i was younger about a guy who’s dad was a professional clown and wanted his son to follow in his footsteps. the scene where the guy explains his dad teaching him to fall down the stairs followed by him falling down the stairs and his dad saying in the most monotone voice imaginable “do it again” still cracks me up to this day.

cartoons also tend to function around slapstick - we see roadrunner drop an anvil on wile e. coyote or see jerry hit tom with an oversized hammer, and that shit’s genuinely funny.

so, what’s different about this? in truly good slapstick, the comedy comes from the context. a father being the reason his son fell down the stairs is under most circumstances not funny - hell, when i phrase it like that, it sounds concerning. but the play being from the son’s perspective (and i believe a semi-autobiographical account of the writer’s actual childhood) shows us not an abusive man trying to harm his son but an awkward dad trying to teach his son his craft. said craft just so happens to involve falling down the stairs.

mice with giant hammers, roadrunners that can create semi-real tunnels with paint, literal bombs shoved in pies– these things are funny bc they’re absurd. obviously someone actually literally dropping an anvil on someone else would in real life be horrific. but we’re shown that, by cartoon logic, it’s not even enough to convince wile e. to go find a different food source.

a common trope in anime is someone hitting someone else so hard they’re sent flying (usually it’s girls doing the hitting, be it to girls or other guys, but i’ve definitely seen guys do it too). hell, pokémon has a running gag of pikachu repeatedly electrocuting ash (and several innocent bikes). how come that’s funny, then? electrocution is serious!

well yes. but we’re shown that it’s exaggerated. there’s no actual serious effect to the characters - bc with slapstick, the intent affects the outcome. pikachu is meant to be stubborn, not malicious. he isn’t trying to seriously hurt ash (or professor oak, for that matter). the intent of the slapstick is to highlight the character’s initial dislike of his new partner, not to create reverse animal abuse.

with the loki series, the intent is to dehumanize (or whatever the asgardian/jotun version of that is). both the characters involved and the creators are doing this not to cause amusement, but to cause harm. to take the character of loki (or, more accurately, a character who’s apparently supposed to be loki but doesn’t resemble him in any way, shape, or form, despite literally being the exact same actor) and say “fuck you” to anyone who enjoyed that character. the point is the cruelty.

and slapstick for the sake of cruelty isn’t slapstick. it’s just bullying.

if the loki show had a laugh track, i think i would’ve been able to pick up on the humor more. i see some people laugh about certain scenes that are meant to be comedic but fall flat for me. your posts as well as others pointing out the humor helped me a lot! all in all loki show was not funny and did not have a great sense of humor.

It's probably because those times where we're supposed to be laughing are occasions where they want us to laugh at Loki not with him.

In previous movies he has glorious moments of sass (like the "oh dear is she dead?" and "congratulations! you just decapitated your grandfather" in TDW, or the "I'm listening" in Avengers, etc), but in the series they want us to laugh while Sif is beating him or Sylvie is telling him how useless and what a clown he is or scenes in which he's corrected and told he's wrong and called a variant or a cosmic mistake.

That can be humorous if he's enjoying it too and he's allowed a comeback but every time that happens he shuts down, doesn't say anything back or whatever the other characters are saying is framed as right and an accurate description of him (or a downright beating because he's a bad guy and he has to be punished for it).

I don't see why anyone would laugh at that, although the power of the framing is big so some of them laugh at it and don't realize how messed up it is.

#mcu #mcu crit #loki series negativity #complaining about shows i won't watch

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asil-norahc · 7 years ago

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Just an idea popped out from Drawpile

Warning: I might make a lot of mistakes in this post bc why not so this is it. Oh, plus harsh language too (as usual i guess).

Okay okay, so, I was drawing on drawpile with peeps and something HAPPENED (greatest introduction ever)

see, on drawpile I draw HorrorSans like that (cartoon character and Croc -bloody bird guy- by @peanutable):

and LustSans this way (plus Pap cuz why not, although I changed his clothing so it isn’t very representative of the original):

And I somehow mixed them up at some point...

May I introduce you to... GoreSans!!!

Let me explain you what he would be if I happened to make an AU around the thing. Well, I DON’T intend to do many things about it so I wouldn’t call it an AU but since I can’t let a character like him with no proper environment to set him in I can’t let you without developping the idea a bit further.

It’s basically a coherent and logical mix between Underlust and Horrortale.

Now those who know what I’m talking about will think I consider them like dumbass, but I’ll develop the idea anyway and that needs a quick reminder of what those two AUs are (don’t blame me for my unecessary rigor):

Underlust. Well, I’d davise you to go check UnderLust Shame Cave, unless you’re under 18 and/or allergic to NSFW. WOW STOP ASKING YOURSELF I won’t make anything NSFW here don’t worry. I’ll try my best to soften everything for it to be accessible to anyone who might be reading this. If you feel offended despite my efforts, say it (politely) in the ask box and I’ll change the tags^^

Now I haven’t read UnderLust very much and I don’t know what occured since a long time, but here’s a quick summary of what I know :

First, it may be NSFW, but the comic has real depht and emotions. There are reasons to WHY THE FUCK EVERYONE FUCKS and that makes this AU completely acceptable to me. Now, the reasons are Gaster and the decrease of fertility due to... well, imprisonment in the underground and chronic lack of hope I guess. Gaster intended to fix the fertility problem by extracting the Lust from the soul of the first human, Chara, who was a... sort of... sadistic bitch? Anyways. Injecting the Lust into (adult) monsters had two consequences: relatively NOT FIX the fertility problem making the children the last ganaration, and turn any adult monster into a slut.

Yeah that definitely legimimates the NSFW for me. Not that it needs any legitimation anyway XD because the comic that came (pun?) out of it is about true love VS lust, sexual identity, abuse and all the emotional mess that comes out of it (hehe da inententional pun lol). So it is surpisingly interesting and kinda moving.

Horrortale. This AU is particular because it is settled in the FUTURE of one of the neutral run. Now, any sensible undertale player WOULDN’T want to have to face the consequences of any run that didn’t ended peacefully, would they?... uh, guess I would at some point...

Anyways, that makes the Horrortale AU really interesting because it just puts some canon facts together and think of how it would evolve with time.

Let’s observe some of said facts:

Toriel attempting to legally take the power and ease everyone’s pain with peace.

Oh! Your acts have consequences!^^ Peace isn’t an option now.

Putsch.

Crusader, surely future tyran.

Sans and Papyrus tempering the current crusader future tyran.

Bros will be bros.

... Click! (Am I the only one that saw a sort of threat in his last word..?)

SO Undyne putsched Toriel out (it’s definitely a coup since Undyne is the equivalent of the General of the Army) and now rules over the Underground with an iron fist in order to develop drastically the army for her to wage a holy war against humanity, implying she will do everything for her army to be well fed above citizens. Mh.

If she’s not going to become a tyran, I dunno.

Now I’m leaving canon facts to start about horror tale context:

To summary, the underground has turned into a sort of dystopic HELL OF A BLOODY MESS since the common monsters who didn’t contributed to Undyne’s army were left starving and had to rely on the only edible things they had on hand: other monsters.

Now feel free to correct me if I’m wrong, but as far as I can remember, this is what turned monsters into... well, dangerous monsters.

SO, now, what would a mix between the two look like? Let’s finally talk about GoreTale!! (okay well I said I wouldn’t make an AU, BUT if this can inspire anyone to develop it into a proper one THAT’D BE FUCKIN COOL OMFG)

So it is set in the future of one particular run of UnderLust if this AU were to be adapted into an Undertale-like video game; Asgore is dead and the other souls disappeared, leaving the monsters behind with grief and despare. At least one monster has been killed by Frisk so that Undyne, Head of the Royal Harem (this is how it is in underlust DON’T ASK ME) decides to rule over the underground with fierce will to destroy all human kind. Because she knows nothing else, she turns the underground into a bloody brothel since she considers people had to surrender their mind, soul AND bodies to her royal persona and cause, plus she being blood thirsty after human’s decay, she does it overly sadistical and strong. Sans tried to temper her at first since his brother was now part of the official Royal Harem and feared for his safety, but she slowly became unreasonable. A bloody tyran, unrelenting and craving for physical and mental/moral abuse.

So Sans gave up on her, even though she was his queen, and left the capital with his brother. His confrontation against her left its mark on his skull, revealing a new aspect of this character: he no longer has only 1HP since he got some new LV by abusing and killing other monster for self-defense and his own need for food and relief. So the head blow didn’t kill him (and I don’t think it should have since Undyne surely must have wanted to keep him locked up somewhere she could torture him in order to mindfuck his personnality..?). Anyways, he must have scared her (or at least surprise her enough for her to let him go with his bro). They returned to Snowdin, and made an agreement with the Queen so that she doesn’t hunt them down: they guard Snowdin and bring her any human that comes by (since they are two of the rare monster that can live under harsh cold weather and that Undyne hates it, it makes sense, besides she doesn’t have to fear Sans and Papyrus’s ambitions to steal human souls from her bc they only intend to survive by their own, away from any form of control over them). And for the other snowdin inhabitants and soldiers she could send to Snowdin instead of potential / official trators, we can state that they are either loyal to the crown in some extreme ways but temper their wrath and lust around the skelebros bc they would surely bone them to death, making the boney bros kinda the chiefs in snowdin, or they are refugees that flee the Queen’s command and sought for protection of the weather and the skelebros, OR they all dead bc skelebros ate them up in all ways.

SO Goretale wouldn’t be the best life place to settle. Horrortale and Underlust aren’t either, but the mix between the two must be even more sordid and glaucous and bloody and slutty at some point and completely infernal. I could see an H.R Giger style for the environment that possibly evolved with the monsters, but with more colours. If you don’t see what I’m talking about, go check by yourselves; the first images must be eloquent enough.

Okay just one example that has no hidden nsfw:

Frogman - Giger meets Escher. imagine it with some red and gold and that’d be totally fit (or not. I don’t care.) I advise you to see more by searching HR Giger.

Warning: it’s art in the “noble” way, but it’s still definitely NSFW AND sordid as heck. So unless your innocence is so extreme you are immuned to sin or you love that kind of thing or you are appealed by some artistical curiosity, keep out!^^ (H.R Giger is a german artist that designed lots of great things including the Aliens of... Aliens. So it’s real good culture and you can check it out without any sinful interest other than artistical curiosity. You’re welcome.)

NOW THE REAL THING (finally. Why the fluff are my summaries always so long?!?)

You know that drawpile allows people to draw at the same time on the same canvas (I feel like I’m repeating myself). Well, tht’s great and it allows things like that to pop out:

Little funny doodles made with @peanutable (here is her OC Verdana, cute lil’ kiddy flowery skely-like monster that is innocence itself why am I not ashamed of putting Goresans in front of him?!? I SHOULD DIE ALREADY SAINTE MERDE !! ).

Now THE GREATEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO ME ON DRAWPIIILE !!!

Frisk by @sky-lia !! She and @peanutable are such amazing artists !! It really inspires me when I see them drawing, and putting my characters in front of theirs really shows the difference of skill! It encourages me a lot to practice and catch the level! And it is really lots of fun to do^^ Oh My Gnarls Frisk is SOOO adorable they manage to move and disconcert GoreSans! And it shows a nice and somewhat cute part of him I surely would never have thought of if I didn’t draw with them ;) (oh well, after all, in this crazy fandom people see cuteness anywhere, even in the most unsettling places, so OF COURSE GoreSans is also a Teddy Bear lmao)

That’s it for today! That’s All Forks! (this pun MUST have been made already)

#lilshits #GoreSans

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thebootybitchdragon · 8 years ago

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Episodes Of (or Things In) Dude! That's My Ghost! I Want But Will Never Have (in no particular order)

Billy getting captured at the end of an episode by Madame X and the next episode, Spencer goes to rescue him all by himself, evading and outsmarting crazy cartoon boobytraps like a boss.

Spencer getting hurt and Billy absolutely loosing his shit bc no one hurts his brotato aight? No. One.

Spencer and Billy needing to go to Madame X for help and her requesting something from Billy as payment like a creeper creep.

Billy actually figuring out how to ghost good.

Billy temporarily being brought back to life and trying to resume his old life, but slowly realizing its not the same and he likes being a ghost better.

Madame X Character Builder Episode.

Time travel episode or Alternate Universe episode where Billy and Spencer need to deal with an Alive!Billy who's somehow even more dramatic than his ghost self. Bonus: Both Billy's can't stand one another bc they both think the other is too egotistical.

PREQUEL EPISODE GODDAMMIT SHOW ME HOW BILLY AND SPENCE MET

Danny Phantom Crossover episode. ir two. or twenty.

Camping episode where they come across something that goes bump in the night and it turns out to be another supernatural, ideally another ghost. Preferably a "wild" one who's been dead and alone for so long they don't remember how to behave in social situations. Bonus: They're better at being a ghost than Billy and that irritates him.

Spencer getting involved with a singing contest and singing one of Billy's songs to win. Perhaps introduces a formal rival of Billy's as a new antagonist who wants to take everything away from Spencer and slander Billy's reputation.

Spencer going on a class trip to somewhere and disaster striking. The main school cast needs to work together to get back home, with Spencer spearheading everything due to his knowledge of stuff and Billy's help. A lot of arguing with Ponzi until Spencer eventually proves hes better suited to lead. Optional: they get stuck in knockoff Ghost Zone.

Alternative: Spencer (and Billy) “winning” a trip to another country and getting into an accident, leading to them being stranded in the middle of nowhere bc the trip was actually a plot by the Rival. Spencer takes this opportunity to film a horror music video, Blare Witch-style, which he then makes an original song for with Billy’s help to get back at the rival.

Billy learns how to become visible to everyone, but can't figure out how to turn back invisible and everyone freaks out about seeing a ghost. Spencer (and friends) has to help him hide the entire Episode.

Billy possessing Spencer, and being unable to figure how to get back out. The two have to exist in the same body for an entire day.

Alternative: Billy and Spence somehow switch places, with Spencer being trapped in Billy's body and and Billy being trapped in Spencer’s.

Collection quest series of episodes, preferably a ghostly artifact or important item(s) of Billy’s that was stolen.

Typical "honey i shrunk the kids" episode where Billy/Spence gets shrunk and The Other needs to figure out how to restore him to his proper size. Bonus: Spence traps MiniBilly in a cup when Billy starts throwing a diva fit.

More episodes focusing on Wild Ghost and Pissy Rival, the specifics of which i can't think of rn. Lolo would prolly have a crush on Rival.

Billy stumbling into a section of the Ghost Zone (or a knockoff version, preferably purple and black) thru a natural portal and being scared by the amount of ghosts. He needs to find his way back home.

With the addition of Knockoff Ghost Zone, Billy and Spence going exploring. Billy finds a ghost guitar that amplifies his abilities and functions similar to Ember's. Optional: the addition of a ghostly antagonist who will stop at nothing to steal Spencer’s living body.

The revelation of another relative of Billy who's involved with things. Preferably Billy's newly discovered father.

An episode focusing on Rajeev and Shanilla, another one focusing on Lolo.

Bobby returning, either as an antagonist or hesitant ally. Confirmation that he’s a mimicking ghost bc honestly that’s just cool.

Billy's body is stolen, and Spencer initially blame's Madame X but it turns out she's equally pissed off at the thief bc how dare someone disrupt her idol's corpse who does that.

Three words: Board Game Ghost. Preferably with inspiration from Board James.

Billy's father learning about his ghost and the two being forced to collaborate. Billy is Not At All Happy about it. Preferably leads to an emotional outburst from Billy about him hating his father bc he wasn't there. Bonus: a conversation with Spencer in a later episode that hints at the fact that the father blames himself for Billy’s death.

Billy getting stuck in a video game, and Spencer needs to help him cheat in order to get back out.

Billy's ectoplasm turning the fallowing into monsters with the typical shenanigans occurring: Wendy, an intelligent bird, a cat, a spider, a dinosaur skeleton, a doll, and Jessica.

An Episode where Billy and Wild Ghost's ectoplasm get accidentally merged and creates a new ghost bc honestly, that just sounds logical. Billy makes it a point to assure Spencer, Rajeeve and Shanilla that the new entity is NOT his kid, despite it absolutely being basically his kid. No one’s fooled.

Another episode where Spencer and others need to become ghosts for some reason. Preferably includes Lolo bc that would be hilarious.

Billy learning how to use songs to do ghost stuff.

A GDAMN MUSICAL EPISODE I MEAN C'MON BILLY'S A MUSICIAN I FEEL CHEATED, SHOW

A Hanukkah episode bc Billy's prolly Jewish and also there's too many Christmas episodes from other cartoons.

Billy organizing a party for Spencer's birthday and shenanigans happening to keep it a secret from him.

Literal vampire and werewolf episodes pls.

Maybe a real zombie? Spencer would flip his lid. Bonus: He’s the smartest, most well spoken and obsessively clean character bc that’s just funny to me.

Evil Overgrown Plant due to Billy's ectoplasm episode. Title is required to be a pun of Little Shop of Horrors. Must have no less than five plant puns.

Episode where Billy and his kid need to deal with each other and the kid tries his best to impress Billy to no avail. his attempts result in imminent disaster, from which Billy saves him then later denies he did it out of worry.

Crossover episode where Danny and Billy get displaced to each other's worlds. Spencer needs to deal with Danny and Billy needs to protect Amity Park. Optional: Vlad tries to pull one of his plots but Billy annoys him too much. Bonus: Billy just keeps swiping Vlad’s football stuff and untying his hair.

Wild Ghost accidentally makes Spencer a demonic being with her ectoplasm (It’s more volatile than Billy’s which is why it would affect humans like that?) and Rajeeve and Shanilla need to work with her to return him to normal before he trashes the Cobra Mansion completely.

Crossover episode where Ponzi (or another antagonist) calls the Fenton's to Beverly Beverly High bc he figures out Billy's a ghost and wants to get rid of him. Danny can see Billy without a personal item due to being half ghost.

Family Vacation episode including Billy's dad, Wild Ghost, and Kid.

Billy and his antagonist rival need to team up for some reason.

A lot of scenes of Wild Ghost just....floating upside down. Running gag with Spencer turning her right back up, occasionally only for her to flop right back upside down again after he leaves.

Spencer being put into a stereotypical insane asylum bc Ponzi thinks he’s crazy for talking to himself (and it also gets Spencer out of the school) and all three of the ghosts have to help break him out.

Billy breaking a wall down with his guitar bc they’re trapped somewhere despite the fact that Spencer just lockpicked the lock door open.

#I just....have a lot of feels for this show rn #If I had any mental stability i'd totally make this an entire fanfic with each episode being a chapter #But i don't #So I can only weep and wonder what could have been.#Dude That's My Ghost!#DTMG #Billy Joe Cobra #Spencer Wright #Ghost #Cartoon

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hermanwatts · 4 years ago

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Sensor Sweep: Beast Master, Time Travel, Grey Hawk

Fiction (Easily Distracted): Year’s Best Horror Stories 1976

The Year’s Best Horror Stories: Series IV Edited by Gerald W. Page (1976 DAW)

Lifeguard by Arthur Byron Cover:A sharp diamond of a story told in the first-person and saying what needs to be said about youth’s expiring ambitions, the narrow horizon of small town life, summertime, pot, and an uncanny will-o-the-wisp.

Anime (Walker’s Retreat): Where have I seen this before? Oh, only with the Star Wars, Star Trek, Doctor Who, Marvel, DC, Biohazard/Resident Evil, The Last of Us, and so many other Western corporate properties. There are two key differences between what’s going on with anime and what’s going on with Western entertainment. The first is that the Death Cult doesn’t run Japan’s culture industry, not the way it is in the West. The second is that the entertainment corporations don’t outright hate their customers. So, instead of esoteric Molech worship we have the (by comparison) easier problem of a Brand Fan problem.

Comic Books (Dark Worlds Quarterly): 1975 was the new Golden Age of dinosaur comics with Joe Kubert leading the pack. By some strange coincidence all the dinosaur/jungle guys had names that started with a T (Tarzan, Turok, Tragg) or a K (Korg and Kong). So Tragg and the Sky-Gods, Korg 70,000 BC and Kong the Untamed made their dino comic cover debuts. Skull the Slayer had dinos but not for long. It got weirder with more UFO stuff. Valley of the Dinosaurs was based on a Hanna-Barbera cartoon and like The Land of the Lost (1974-1976) (which didn’t have a comic) was Saturday Morning pandering to the dino lovers.

D&D (Tao DND): The Higher Path of D&D, the one beyond merely killing things and taking away their treasure, is the human experience of pitting Self against that which we do not think should be. Not my self. The Player’s Self. The players are entitled to fight for those causes they want to fight for. I won’t tell them how to do that; I won’t shame them into fighting for causes I think are right and noble; I won’t clear the road for them. I won’t judge them for their choices. I won’t encourage them to believe what I believe and I won’t punish them when they don’t.

Fiction (DMR Books): When you think of literary thieves, who do you think of? Maurice Le Blanc’s sly gentleman thief Arsene Lupin? Richard Stark’s harden, professional Parker? Yet, aside from the crime genre, thievery as an occupation appears most often in sword and sorcery. Thieves as protagonists have a long history in sword and sorcery. This trope probably began in mythology and legend. Prometheus stole fire from the gods. Robin Hood stole from the rich and gave to the poor. In High Fantasy, Bilbo Baggins was recruited to burgle a dragon. So let’s look at their fictional heritage.

Writing (John C. Wright): For every C.S. Lewis, J.R.R. Tolkien, Cordwainer Smith, Gene Wolfe, Walter M. Miller, or Orson Scott Card writing from a Christian perspective, one can list ten men of heathen or secular perspective lauded with the greatest fame our genre can bestow. Instead of Gene Roddenberry making stories to say men cannot be free in utopia or George Lucas saying men must fight their dark side, we now have Kathleen Kennedy and Rian Johnson making stories to say free men are toxic, and that the fight is pointless, for the light offers no more answers than the darkness.

Interview (Superversive SF): Today, we have a treat! An interview with Brian Niemeier, author of Don’t Give Money to People Who Hate You in which he talks about how he came to write this surprise breakout book. 1. How did you come to write this book?

I almost didn’t. My dispositions have always run toward writing fiction, so I initially resisted tackling nonfiction. It was only when several friends, family members, and readers urged me to collect my thoughts on the culture war in a book that I relented.

Pulp Magazines (Don Herron): In Chapter 2 of the 1943 serial Batman — “The Bat’s Cave” — Bruce Wayne’s butler Alfred wiles away the time reading the October 1940 issue of Spicy Detective. The “spicy” element should be obvious from the cover art—and from the prim Alfred’s startled expression. The content of the stories lived up to the lascivious suggestion of the cover. But only just.

Horror (Too Much Horror Fiction): When it comes to pulp horror fiction, I don’t think there’s any doubt that “Slime” is one of the perfect gems of the style. Originally published in a 1953 issue of the venerated magazine “Weird Tales,” Joseph Payne Brennan’s 30-odd page tale is rife with all the weaknesses and all the glories of pulp horror in full flower. Brennan overuses words and phrases (“hood of horror” and “black mantle”), utilizes some weak analogies (alien as… some wild planet in a distant galaxy), and his country dialogue makes “Hee-Haw” sound like Olivier reciting the Bard.

Westerns (Western Fiction Review): This time, the author behind the pseudonym of Tabor Evans is James Reasoner and he provides us with a cracking tale. The action comes thick and fast as Longarm searches for the long missing army payroll. From the word go someone is out to stop Longarm getting to Sweetwater Canyon but he battles through. Once there Longarm finds himself in a range war and the canyon is part of the land being fought for.

Cinema (New Iron Age Blogspot): Released in 1982, this movie was a complete flop and only became well-known, and something of a cult classic, when it became ubiquitous on cable throughout the 80s. To kids of my generation, this was one of their early experiences with Sword & Sorcery, and maybe the very first. It established in a lot of kid’s minds what the genre was supposed to be, and it still inspires a lot of affection to this day.

D&D (Dungeon Fantastic): What I like about the systems I’d consider: AD&D – Power level. I like the HP levels. I have a strong dislike for d4 HP thieves and I like d10 fighters better than d8 fighters. – Cleric spells. I like clerics getting spells at level 1, and bonuses for Wisdom are fine with me. I get why from a world-building standpoint the vast majority of clerics being level 1 and not getting spells makes PCs quickly become special . . . but I’d rather have them start with a spell. – I like AC starting at 10, not 9 (but see below.)

Hugos (Emperor Ponders): Some particular trends in genre literature have become obvious during the past few years. One of them is the use of Brobdingnagian titles, a compulsion to write paragraph-long titles, some of whom even give away the plot. I suspect this may have started as a quirky, ironic thing to do, but I don’t think it’s funny unless you are lampooning or referencing some stuffy style like academic papers or writing comedy. And, to be fair, that’s to some extent what this story is doing—referencing, not the comedy.

Anthology (Science fiction fantasy blogspot): Beyond Time: Classic Tales of Time Unwound, edited by Mike Ashley This is one of a number of anthologies in the Science Fiction Classics series published by the British Library, this one (as you may have guessed) dealing with time travel. As usual in this series, there is a long introduction by the editor, supplemented by biographical notes on the authors at the start of each story.

RPG (Grey Hawk Grognard): The thing to remember first in a Greyhawk-setting mass combat is that the AD&D rules are geared towards small, skirmish-level actions. In other words, melee with a small party of adventurers and a relatively small group of enemies and/or monsters. This scale is reflected in the spells, such as animate dead (there’s really no way to have a literal army of skeletons unless you have hundreds of 5th level clerics or 9th level magic-users) and even mass invisibility requires a 14th level magic-user, and such are exceedingly rare in the World of Greyhawk.

History (Didact’s Reach): Legends were forged on that day, such as that of “The Boys of Pointe du Hoc”. Heroes fought to the bitter end, on both sides. Germans opened the gates of Hell itself upon the Allied infantrymen wading ashore through the pounding surf of Omaha Beach, raining shot and shell down on them. Americans and Canadians and British and New Zealanders and many others bayoneted, grenaded, shot, clubbed, and mauled their German opponents to their gruesome deaths.

Pulp Fiction (Rough Edges): Of the many, many series written for the pulps by H. Bedford-Jones, his longest-running featured a fat little Cockney named John Solomon, which ran from 1914 to 1936 and encompassed more than twenty novels and novellas. John Solomon may not seem very impressive at first glance, but he actually runs a far-flung intelligence network and makes a specialty of thwarting all sorts of criminal and espionage schemes around the world. I’ve been aware of this series for years but hadn’t read any of them until recently, when I started at the most logical place, the novel THE GATE OF FAREWELL, which was published originally as a serial in ARGOSY in 1914 and is Solomon’s first appearance.

Sensor Sweep: Beast Master, Time Travel, Grey Hawk published first on https://sixchexus.weebly.com/

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