#Thank you for asking! I always feel it should be known that the terms conflict and tension

[blissfulalchemist]

Is it important to include tension or outright areas of conflict in a relationship? If so then how do you explore these? Or does this not appeal to you?

I think there needs to be some tension of some kind in relationships. They don't have to be big, but they should fit the kind of story you're telling or the world in which it is set. There is some tension in real world relationships as we are human and it is inevitable, the level of them is just varied and different from couple to couple. From a fictional standpoint it makes a story a story, you can't really have a story if there's no conflict of any kind, even if its not between the couple it could be the outside world creating a kind of tension or conflict (like Hyth and Anthea in the Final Days or Joshua and Alma in xvi, both couples are very positive ships with no tension between each other and yet the world around them is making this tension or conflict), and some can even be low stakes like a sitcom situation (Tia and Conner are the first to come to mind with them having misunderstandings and the mutual coworker pining or Greg and Skyla from Succession where at first their tension stemmed from Greg's boss).

I also personally find using my characters and writing to explore different conflicts helps me to understand them. Whether that be actual tensions with people in my life, or internal tension and conflict where the two characters represent aspects of me. Other times I just want to see what would happen and how does one character effect another, my put them in a bottle and shake it up to see what happens if you will.

All in all though conflict and tension make a story but how much/how big it is varies from story to story and couple to couple. The only exception to this is writing out the small moments or specific scenes where you can be totally free of such things because its a moment in time and to quote Hyth "Unbreakable bonds and noble sacrifice, sprinkled with moments of levity to counterbalance the pathos. It's got it all." a summary of the kind of stories I love and hope to have when I create mine.

[valkyrie-night-103]

The one and only anon fan coming at you to ask about terms of surrender

Hello, wonderful anon!! Thank you so so much for your continued support! Like I said before, I am available on tumblr and discord, feel free to DM me or friend me on discord (I’ll put my tag in my bio) if you would like to talk more about fic!

I have been DYING to talk about this one, it’s my main project right now. It went from a concept that I was going to write a little one shot about to a multi-chapter fic that currently consists of 7 chapters of varying lengths, totalling 20,000 words, and is about half done!

It’s got a lot of twists and turns and I really don’t want to completely spoil it for anyone, but if you like the golden lovers, getting-back-together fics filled with domestic fluff, emotional conflict and betrayal that isn’t between the main couple, with a dose of murder, revenge and most importantly, wrestling— this is the fic for you!!

Content warning for self deprecating thoughts, depression, just general emotional burnout.

Disclaimer, mobile formatting is awful.

Below the cut is a sneak peek of the first chapter! There is a prologue but I think the first chapter gives you a better assessment of the story direction, whereas the prologue kind of lays the groundwork and gives context for chapter one, but is not strictly necessary. This way is more exciting!

Chapter One : the road to ruin (and we’re starting at the end)

The segment goes as planned, for the most part. He tells the fans he’s going away for a while. That he needs time to recover, to recuperate, to finally rest. When they’re off the air, he embraces both Matt and Nick, an arm around each of them. He holds them at arms length, and smiles at them warmly. He hopes it reaches his eyes.

Naturally, Cole encroaches on their little moment. He opens his arms for a hug, but Kenny has already stuck his hand out for a stiff and awkward handshake before he can step closer. Cole’s barely concealed annoyance at the blatant snub makes him feel a little bit victorious, and he’s kind of in need of that right now.

Cole’s grip is tight as they shake, other hand also clasped around Kenny’s. He makes direct and prolonged eye contact, and though he’s probably not aware that Kenny finds eye contact awkward at the best of times, it still really annoys him.

Although, there’s something not quite right about those eyes. Adam Cole has always had bright blue eyes, but in this light they’re almost glazed silver. They’ve looked different since they brought him back, he’s noticed. Even when he laughs, there’s something menacing there.

Kenny had known even at the time that he was an amateur at anything spiritual, Cole was bound to come back a little bit wrong, but right now it’s so stark and obvious, staring him in the face in the most literal sense. It just gives him the creeps, and some part of him feels like he should have listened when Malakai said every ritual has a consequence somewhere down the line. That he shouldn’t have put the warning in his face down to his generally menacing presence.

“I’ll see you guys around.” He says, a lie that he knows will come back to bite him. It just feels right, like he’s meant to say it.

He takes a few steps back, not wanting to look away, before finally finding the courage to turn and go. Once he starts, he can’t stop, and though his dodgy knees protest with every step he walks faster and faster until he’s running, and then he runs, far enough away to breathe again.

He pulls out his phone and books the flight on his way out of the hotel. He waits to board, and he looks through his chat history, scrolling through old conversations. It’s nostalgic in a melancholy way. Time moves so strangely, he feels like he’s lived a lifetime since leaving to start AEW.

On the journey, he tilts his head back and tries to relax. Sleep is off the table, but maybe relaxing is a more attainable goal. His mind wanders and meanders, he feels like he’s chasing nothing, searching for something he’ll never find.

He goes through the motions after touching down, and he already feels like he’s come home. Japan has been his home since he first flew out there to wrestle for DDT, some 15 years ago. He remembers it so clearly, and sometimes he wishes he didn’t, because it hurts to recall a time where he believed in himself, owned who he was and would never trade it for anything.

He’s not really thinking about where his feet are taking him, but he doesn’t need to. He knows where he’s going.

As his mind often does when unoccupied for any period of time, he wonders what Kota thinks of him now, just as that sign had asked.

When Kota is alone, looking out at the skyline of his hometown, does he think of him fondly? When his name is mentioned, does his face twist in irritation or soften with fond familiarity?

Either way, it’s a little late to be having these doubts on the man’s doorstep.

[skelabra]

The Man Called Yoshitaka Mine Event Story

Mine’s backstory from the Yakuza Online event. This one is a rather long story and explains how and why Mine became a member of the Yakuza, his relationship with Kanda and, of course, how he met Daigo. 

[Mine is in his office. He is looking at the picture of himself as a child.]

Mine: Born as an orphan, I’ve always been alone.

The only person I could call close to me was my adoptive father. After he passed away, I realized how lonely I really was.

I was not loved by anyone, not needed by anyone... There was no adult who could reach out to me.

I was living in post-war orphan-like poverty, facing nothing but loneliness every day...

So I swore to myself.

"I'm going to be great. I'm going to be great, and I'm going to get money and status..."

And... I got it. Absolute money and status.

At the same time, I have been looking for something from the bottom of my heart all along at the place I have arrived at.

...What it feels like to have a “bond”.

My subordinates who admire me, believe in me, and follow me.

As I have lived in solitude my whole life, it is very comforting to me...

The truth was, I had always known, deep down, that it was a "lie".

I should have known...

 [OFFICE]

Mine: You're dismissing me... from the R&D department? Me? Tashiro, what is this all about?

Tashiro: This was a decision made by the board of directors. We would like the Chairman to leave the R&D department.

Mine: What kind of... nonsense is this? This is my company, remember? Do you really think this is an acceptable thing to do?

Tashiro: Mr. Chairman, I understand your feelings, but please understand.

You will be out of the field, but you will continue to watch over us as the Chairman.

I was hoping that it would take the heavy burden off your shoulders.

Mine: Shut up!

Tashiro: !

Mine: In other words, you don’t want me to interfere in your business!? What's the point of a token chairmanship!?

This is a coup d'etat!

Tashiro: ... You have been too selfish.

Frequent changes in plans, increased budgets, and repeated investments in unprofitable sectors......

If this continues, the company will eventually collapse. That's why we have to ask you to step down.

Mine: I did all that because I needed to! And in fact, I've been very successful that way, haven't I!?

Hey, Otsuka! What's your opinion as the development manager!?

Otsuka: ... I’m sorry to say this, but...

I think it is a reasonable decision.

Mine: W-What?

Otsuka: The project that you were working on was certainly innovative, but it was not expected to be profitable for several years to come.

Even though it is said to be an investment in the future, we cannot survive on scraps.

Because of this, you have not been able to offer any incentives to your employees for the past few years, right?

Mine: If you only make decisions based on short-term profits, your company has no future!

Tashiro: It has already been decided. Thank you for your hard work, Chairman Mine.

Mine: ... Kuh...

[Mine goes outside to take a walk.]

 [OUTSIDE]

Mine: ...

(I've been betrayed... I've lost everything...)

(They are just scum that only cares about money.)

(Friends? Family? Bonds? Why did I ever trust these people?)

(This world is full of lies...)

[Gunshots]

Mine: ... What was that?... A... gunshot?...

[Tires screeching]

 Raid Yakuza: Daigo Dojima!! Get out of the car!!

Mine: (A yakuza... conflict? Daigo Dojima?)

Raid Yakuza A: Daigo Dojima! I know you're in the car! Get out of the fucking car!

[He shoots a few times.]

Mine: (I believe Daigo Dojima is the Sixth Chairman of the Tojo Clan?)

(Damn. A yakuza attack at a time like this...)

(It would be dangerous to get involved in this. I should hide somewhere.)

Raid Yakuza A: Daigo Dojima! Die!!

[He shoots again.]                                    

Daigo's subordinate A: You bastard! What family do you belong to?! Guh!

Raid Yakuza B: Hahahahaha! Die!!

[He shoots.]

Daigo's subordinate B: I cannot let you kill Daigo-san!!

Raid Yakuza C: Whoaa!

[Fade to white. Gunshots.]

Policeman: It’s no good. They’re dead.

Policeman: Four members of the Tojo Clan are dead. All of the five attackers are also dead.

Detective: I see... Still young and yet they were yakuza...

Daigo: ... Kuh...

Mine: (... That guy is Daigo Dojima?)

Detective: Dojima-san, you're in a tough business, huh? Let the young ones die and only one survives.

Daigo: ...

Mine: (... The yakuza who protected Daigo Dojima, they’re all dead...)

(His men would give up their lives for their boss?)

(I had no idea that such a thing actually existed, even in the world of organized crime.)

(That man named Daigo Dojima...)

(Is he really that great of a man... that his men would give up their lives for him?)

 The next day...

 [STREET]

Mine: (That scene I saw the other day... comes back to my mind over and over again.)

(I've heard that there are "absolute bonds" in the world of organized crime...)

(I want to learn more about this man named Daigo Dojima...)

Thug A: Hey, Nii-chan. Are you going to a good shop today?

Mine: !

Thug A:  We know who you are. Nii-chan, you go to a fancy shop every night, right?

Thug B: You look like you’re rich. You must have a lot of money in that wallet then, right?

Mine: What do you want?

Thug A: Don't you understand? I'm just asking you to give us some pocket money.

Thug B: We’re members of the Tojo Clan, you know~ Maybe you should just be quiet and pay up?

Mine: The Tojo Clan, huh?

... Just in time. I've been meaning to ask you something. If you want your money, you'll have to answer my questions.

Thug A: Huh!? A question? Do you think you’re some kind of yakuza? I told you to shut up and pay up!

Thug B: Aniki! He's screwing with us! Let's beat him up!

Mine: Good grief. It's no use. It looks like I’m going to have to do some rough interrogation.

[Mine beats them up.]

Thug A: E-Eek... What the hell is this guy, he's strong!

Mine: Well, it seems that... I’m enjoying this a little.

... So, you guys are going to answer my question then, right? I will pay you. How about 100,000?

Thug A: 1-100,000!? If I answer your questions, you’ll give that to me?!

Mine: Yes.

Thug B: Aniki, we’re gonna make a fortune!

Thug A: What’s the question!? I'll tell you anything you want to know!

[Fade to black.]

Mine: ... I see...

So the men who died protecting Daigo Dojima the other day were not some kind of Security Police, but ordinary members of the Clan...

If that’s the case, they were not being paid a lot of money?

Thug A: Nah. They were all young people who lived in single rooms. I'm pretty sure they were only getting paid pocket money.

Mine: (So it wasn't for the reward that they protected Daigo Dojima.)

Hey. What kind of a man is this Daigo Dojima?

Thug A: What kind of a man... he's the new Chairman. He’s a former thug who suddenly became Chairman because of the recommendation of the Fourth Chairman.

Mine: He’s newly appointed and... a former thug?

Thug A: Yeah. His father was the leader of the Dojima Family, but until recently, the Chairman himself was just a thug.

So, he has no Family of his own, he has no achievements, and to be honest, I don't know why he's the Chairman.

Mine: ... I see. From the sound of it, he doesn't seem to have the support of the members.

Thug B: Yeah. There's a lot of opposition from within the organization. I heard there’s trouble.

Mine: (If that's the case, I don’t understand.)

(Why would these members of the Clan give up their lives for a man like that?)

(That man named Daigo Dojima. I guess I'll have to do some more research on him.)

(An absolute bond. Is there really such a thing?)

 [OFFICE]

Mine: (Since then, I've tried to find out more about... this man named Daigo Dojima, but I don’t understand.)

(He seems to have gained charismatic support among some of the members... Why?)

(I suppose I'll have to see for myself.)

 [STREET – BAR DISTRICT]

Mine: (According to the thug from the other day, there will be a celebration tonight to celebrate the release of a man named Kanda from the Nishikiyama Family.)

(The Nishikiyama Family, despite being a direct subsidiary, has been in shambles since the death of the Second Patriarch.)

(They've got nothing to offer, a direct subsidiary organization in name only, and a he’s cash-strapped yakuza who just got out of prison.)

(If Kanda's the man he’s rumoured to be, this should be an opportunity to get in.)

Mine: ! That's...

Kanda: What the hell!? I'm celebrating my release from prison and you’re the only one who showed up!?

Nishikiyama Family Member A: I-I’m sorry. Everyone else seems to be busy with other matters...

Kanda: ... Y-You bastards...

Hey! Clench your teeth, dumbass!!

Nishikiyama Family Member A: Eek!

[Kanda beats him up. The Nishikiyama Family Member collapses.]

Kanda: I don’t have time for this shit, idiot!!

[He walks away.]

Mine: (Just as I was informed. He's an arrogant yakuza with no accomplishments or following. He's an irritable, violent idiot...)

(And... he just got out of jail, and has no money.)

(I might be able to control that man.)

 [DIFFERENT STREET – BAR DISTRICT]

Kanda: Shit! The price of that soapland has gone up so much!

They won’t reduce the price for release parties, right... I've got 10,000 yen on me.

Oh?

Young woman: Oh no. I think I'm lost...

[She walks away.]

Kanda: Heheheh... I don't have any money, so I don't have a choice, do I?

[Kanda follows her.]

Mine: (He’s following that young woman. Could it be...?)

Young woman's voice: Aah-!!

Mine: !

[Mine runs after them. Fade to black.]

 [BACK ALLEY]

Young woman: What are you doing!?

Kanda: Heheheh. Well, of course it’s supposed to feel good.

Young woman: ... Huh?

Kanda: If you stay quiet, I'll make you feel like you're in heaven! Come on, let me take care of you!

Young woman: N-Nooo!!

Mine: ...You're doing great. You reoffended on the same day you were released.

Kanda: W-What the hell!?

Mine: I have something to tell you. I can’t let you get arrested.

Kanda: W-Who the hell are you!? I'm in the middle of something here!

If you get in the way, I'll kill you!

Mine: My name is Yoshitaka Mine. I have something to tell you today...

Kanda: You’re crazy! Die!!!

Mine: Kuh! I guess you’re not... as easy to communicate with as I thought.

[Fade to black.]

Kanda: Hah... Hah...

W-What’s up with you, you’re just running around all over the place!

Mine: Because I'm not going to fight you. Please, let's talk...

Kanda: You’re crazy!

[Kanda tries to hit Mine. Mine dodges.]

Kanda: I want to go have some fun with this woman right now!

Young woman: E-Eek...

Mine: (He’s too worked up, he won’t listen to me. No other way, then. I'll have to use my back-up plan.)

Kanda: W-What's that? A wad of cash?

Mine: Kanda-san. This is 500,000. With this money, could you please let her off the hook?

Kanda: T-T-That’s 500,000!? G-Give that to me!

Guheheh. Half a million... What soapland could I go to?

Mine: (Money for fools. There's no better medicine than that.)

Young woman: ...

Mine: Hey, why don't you just get out of here? You can at least walk, right?

Young woman: !... Y-Yes!

[She walks away.]

Kanda: Heh, heheheh. With this, I can go for the full package of options. Damn, I'm getting excited just thinking about it.

Let’s go!

Mine: Kanda-san! Please wait!

Kanda: W-What the hell! I'm about to go on a huge party!

Mine: Half a million will be spent in no time, won’t it? Are you sure you want to be satisfied with that amount of money?

Kanda: For quite a while, you...

What the hell do you want!?

Mine: I’ll be straight to the point. Kanda-san, would you like to make some money with me?

Kanda: Money? What do you mean? If this is some multi-level marketing thing, I’m not interested!!

Mine: No, it's nothing like that.

Actually, I'd like to make a name for myself in the world of organized crime.

It's said to be a 7 trillion yen business. If we can get in on that, we should be able to make a huge profit.

If it was just about money, I have plenty of that, but... I have no connections.

Therefore, Kanda-san. I would like to ask you to introduce me to the Nishikiyama Family.

Kanda: Me? That’s pretty weird.

Mine: Of course, I'm not saying you have to do it for free. I have 20 million here.

Kanda: T-T-T...Twenty million!?

Mine: With this as a gift, could you please... introduce me to the Nishikiyama Family?

 __________________________________________________

 [NISHIKIYAMA FAMILY OFFICE]

2nd Acting Patriarch of the Nishikiyama Family: Hoh. The chairman of a Venture Capital company, huh...

{T/N: I will shorten his title to 2nd AP from now on, since this guy is never even given a name.}

Kanda: Acting Patriarch. This guy, Mine, he seems to be really good at making money.

I’m sure he’s going to become a great power for the Family.

2nd AP: Well, he brought plenty of gifts with him, so I guess it’s okay.

Kanda, please tell him about the Family.

Kanda: Yeah. Leave it to me.

... Okay then. So, Mine, what should I tell you about first?

Mine: Kanda-san. Then, first of all, could you tell me about the financial situation of the Nishikiyama Family?

Kanda: The finances? Yeah, alright.

[Fade to black.]

Kanda: ... And that’s the situation. Since the death of the previous Patriarch, the Family’s been in a messy state because of internal turmoil.

Mine: I see. In other words... “management improvements” are necessary.

... I understand. I will try to think of a way to increase our income.

 A few days later...

 [NISHIKIYAMA FAMILY OFFICE]

Kanda: What the hell!? You want us to buy up the Third Kuwata Building!?

Mine: Yes. I thought it would be a key piece of real estate for the Nishikiyama Family to significantly increase their income.

Kanda: But, Mine, the tenants in that building won’t make much money.

What else is in there except for shady massage parlors, unsuccessful ramen shops, and out-of-style bars?

Mine: Actually... the immensely successful Club Gold Panther is currently looking for a second location.

The location of the Third Kuwata Building seems to be the perfect fit for what they are looking for.

Kanda: What the hell? The Gold Panther?

Mine: Yes. Therefore, we should sort out the legal relations of that building, buy it up, clear out the lot, and then sell it off.

I’ve already talked to the owner of Gold Panther.

Kanda: That’s... land sharking. But, isn’t that building in the territory of the Kongo Family, a third-tier organization of the Rikio Clan?

Hey. Mine, you can’t... are you trying to start a war right now?

Mine: No, no. I’m going to negotiate to avoid that.

It’s „M&A“.

Kanda: Uh, „M“? What's that?

Mine: The plan is to incorporate the Kongo Family as a subordinate group of the Nishikiyama Family.

That means that they will be transferred from the Rikio Clan to us.

Kanda: Uhm... In other words, you're gonna make their entire group and territory a part of ours?

Mine: Yes. That way, the land sale that we are after will go smoothly.

Kanda: I see...

Mine: And if we incorporate the Kongo Family, not only that specific territory, but also the other territories that the Kongo Family holds will come with it.

From what I've been able to find out, the Kongo family has a number of influential territories.

However, they seem to be struggling because of a lack of an efficient management, which is preventing them from raising their profits.

Therefore, if we improve our management after incorporating them into our Family, our payments to the Clan should increase.

Kanda: But, how is that going to work? Are they just going to join us so easily?

Mine: In that regard, I'm going to negotiate with the Rikio Clan on that, and offer a small payment to the top of the Clan.

Kanda: Hoh. Make a small payment...

Mine: This would be a good deal for us. The payment to their Clan is small, but our monthly income will eventually increase.

It will take some initial investment on our part, but I am certain that it will eventually pay off greatly.

As for the parent organization, the Rikio Clan, I'm sure they will have some complaints... but they are a weak, moderate organisation, so even if they are directly associated...

They wouldn't think of fighting with the Nishikiyama Family.

Kanda: I see. It's true that the Second Chairman of the Rikio Clan is a weakling. I'm sure he wouldn't fight back.

But the problem is... the members. If the Kongo Family changed Clans for the sake of money, that wouldn’t be a honorable thing to do.

To be honest, I doubt they’ll listen to you.

Mine: ... If that’s the case... I will have one more bargaining chip for negotiation.

Kanda: Bargaining chip?

 [NEGOTIATION – KONGO FAMILY OFFICE, I GUESS]

Kongo: ... I see. Certainly, it's not a bad deal.

Mine: ... What do you think? Would you be willing to consider it?

Kongo: Mine-san. As someone who previously had a respectable occupation you may not understand this, but the criminal underworld is a world of honor.

If I left the Rikio Clan, the organization that has taken care of me, and joined the Nishikiyama Family, it would be a betrayal of my parent organization.

That's the one thing I cannot do, no matter what. Honor is more valuable than money.

Mine: Honor... you say. I see... what you mean. It’s just...

Patriarch Kongo. Have you not already lost your honor?

Kongo: What? What do you mean?

Mine: I heard that you made a lot of money through an insolvency arrangement last month. However, you have not reported that.

You're trying to evade your payment to the Rikio Clan, aren't you?

Kongo: Wha-...

Mine: And it wasn’t just that last month. For the last six months, there are indications that you have been evading the payments to the Clan.

I’m guessing it was because you were struggling to raise enough money, but it is still undeniably an act of betrayal, isn’t it?

Kongo: ... H-Hey...

Mine: This cannot be overlooked, can it? How are you going to make amends for this?

Kongo: ... Kuh...

Mine: However, if you join us, we'll take care of the situation.

How may I help you?

Kongo: ...

 [OUTSIDE]

Kanda: Heheheh. I didn't expect it to go so well. Mine, you're really good.

Mine: Thank you for your kind words. ...Hmm?

Thug: You bastards... you think you're going to make it out of here in one piece?

Kanda: What’s that, the Kongo Family? I thought we spoke to the boss.

Thug: I don't care about the boss. This is our way of getting things done.

Mine: Well, I guess there are these kind of people, too.

Kanda: Mine. Leave the violence to me.

[Kanda beats them up.]

 A few days later...

 [NISHIKIYAMA FAMILY OFFICE]

Mine: Kanda-san. We succeeded in selling the property where the Third Kuwata Building was located.

I've included the money from the sale into our income.

Kanda: Hahaha! We're raking it in! Mine, you're a great guy!

Mine: I’m happy I was able to help you. However, we have a long way to go.

It seems that there are many groups that are suffering from the scars of the war with Omi, with unprofitable territories and little income.

We should intervene in such a territory and try to improve the management.

I intend to propose the transfer to the Nishikyama Family to the leading third-tier and lower organizations on advantageous terms.

Kanda: Oh. Take over them fast!

Mine: This may be abrasive, but if we’re able to improve the management, the profits of the Tojo Clan as a whole will increase significantly.

That also means an increase in the amount of money paid to the headquarters.

Kanda: Huhuhuh. It's getting interesting. I say, it's going to be rough in Kamurocho.

Mine: (It's a rather aggressive move, but if we make a huge profit and stand out, we're sure to catch the attention of Daigo Dojima.)

(And then, I can determine. What kind of man he is.)

 Mine became a member of the Nishikiyama Family.

A few weeks later...

 [CLUB]

Kanda: Hahaha! Today's on me, drink up!

Underling Thug A: Aniki! Thank you very much!

Underling Thug B: Anyway, Aniki. It's amazing what you've been doing lately! You've been doing spectacular work since you came back!

Kanda: That's right! If it's about running a business, you can count on me! I learned a lot about management while I was in jail.

Underling Thug B: That's my Aniki! Not only are you a strong fighter, but you're smart too!

Kanda: Hahaha! That's right~! If I keep up the good work, I'll be a Patriarch soon!!

Underling Thug A: Aniki! Then I’ll be the Captain, right!?

Kanda: Idiot! Why would you. My right hand man is Mine. Right, Kyoudai?

Mine: ... Huh? Yes. That's right.

...

Kanda: What's the matter, Mine? You don't look well. Are you feeling sick?

Mine: ... No. It's not like that, but... I was wondering why the opposition from the acquisition partner is stronger than I expected.

We are offering ideal conditions, and we are trying to improve our management.

Kanda: That's because you're making them betray their parent organization. It's a matter of honor.

Mine: It’s... honor. That's what the Patriarch of the Kongo Family said.

Kanda: In the world of the yakuza, the relationship between the parent organization and their children is absolute. It's a bond that’s stronger than blood.

We're willing to give up our lives for our Clan. That’s our way of life.

Mine: You’d even throw away your life?

Kanda: Yes. But it's not just the parent organization and its children. Kyoudai are also important. That means... you and me.

Mine: Eh? Kanda-san and... me?

Kanda: Yeah. We're kyoudai now. That's why, Mine. When I'm really in danger...

You’ll have to put your life on the line for me. Okay?

Mine: ...

Yes. Of course.

(Hah. Me, for Kanda-san? I hope you’re kidding.)

 [OUTSIDE]

Mine: (Just as I thought. The building is too good of a location to be kept as a rental office.)

(The problem is the group that’s in charge of it... I heard the Myogi Family are a violent organization.)

Yakuza: Hey, you're Mine of the Nishikiyama Family, aren't you?

Mine: ... Yes, and you are?

Yakuza: I’m a member of the Tojo-Rikio Clan group’s Myogi Family.

Mine: !

Yakuza: I heard you've been disturbing our territory lately. Just because the Rikio Clan is a more peaceful organization doesn't mean you should underestimate them.

I can't just sit back and let you mock my parent organization.

Mine: ...Tch!

[Mine fights them.]

Mine: Kuh... How many of these guys are there...

Yakuza: You're doing pretty good, but you're not quite there yet.

Mine: (Damn it! That many... this is not good.)

Yakuza: Hey, you... what's in that briefcase you've been holding so carefully?

Mine: !

(Not good. This is the 50 million yen payment which is supposed to be delivered to the organization...)

Yakuza: Leave it with me. Then I’ll spare your life.

Mine: Unfortunately, this is too much money to waste on a bunch of thugs like you. I can't give it to you.

Yakuza: I see. Then... die!

[Car noises.]

Kanda: Mineeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

Mine: What's with that car? It’s heading this way...

Kanda: What the hell are you doing to my kyoudai!! Ooooooh!!

Mine: Is that... Kanda-san!?

[More car noises.]

Yakuza Underling: Whoa! What's with that car...

[Tires screeching.]

Yakuza Underling: Whoa, that’s dangerous... Aaaaah!

[He gets hit by the car.]

Kanda: Mine! Are you okay?

Mine: ... Ka-Ka-Ka... Kanda-san!? What!?

Kanda: Get in!! Let's get out of here!!

Mine: Y-Yes!!

[Mine gets in the car.]

Yakuza: Don't let them get away! Shoot!!

[Gunshots. Tires screeching.]

 [INSIDE OF THE CAR]

Kanda: Mine! Are you hurt!?

Mine: N-No. Thank you.

Kanda: Okay. I'm glad. I was worried because you weren’t coming back for so long...

Mine: (Kanda-san, did you really risk your life for me?)

Kanda: What, Mine. What are you looking at?

Mine: Nothing. I’m just a little surprised. I didn't expect that Kanda-san would come.

Kanda: What are you talking about? I told you. The bond between kyoudai is absolute.

Mine: !

Kanda: I'm not a guy who just talks, okay?

Mine: Kanda-san... Thank you very much.

Kanda: ... Hey, Mine. Can I ask you something?

Mine: Y-Yes?

Kanda: The money, is it safe?

Mine: Eh? The money? Ah, yes. The payment to the top. It's safe.

Kanda: I see. I'm glad.

Mine: ...

(... Don’t tell me that you came to save me not for my sake, but for the money?)

Kanda: N-No! I was just checking!

Mine: Ha, hah... I see.

Kanda: By the way, Mine. There's something that's been bothering me for a while.

Mine: What is it?

Kanda: You... You still don't call me Aniki, do you?

Mine: What?

Kanda: A-ni-ki... I'm your Aniki, remember?

Mine: ... Ah. Of course. I understand.

... Kanda-no-Aniki.

(Whether it's for my sake or not, I’m sure you're there to help.)

(I owe Kanda-no-Aniki one for today.)

 [CLUB]

Kanda's subordinate A: Aniki, congratulations on your new position as Captain!

Kanda: Hahaha! You guys should call me "Kashira" from now on!

Kanda's subordinate A: Yes! Kashira!

Kanda: The Nishikiyama Family is thriving thanks to my great achievements. You guys must be glad I'm back!

Kanda's subordinate B: Yes! Thank you so much!

Kanda: Mine, you're the Lieutenant. That’s a big promotion!

Mine: Thank you very much. I owe it all to Kanda-no-Aniki.

 One hour later...

 Kanda's subordinates: Guh-...

Kanda: Oh, man. They're asleep.

Mine: ... Really, even though they’re in front of my Aniki. Hey!

Kanda: It’s fine, it’s fine.

Mine: But...

Kanda: ... Mine, I wanted to talk to you in private. It’s good that no one’s bothering us.

Mine: Eh? In... private?

Kanda: ... Mine. If it weren't for you, I'd still just be a simple thug.

I'm really grateful to you, you know.

Mine: !

... No. I’ve only been a small help to you.

Kanda: Kyoudai, you're as humble as ever.

But you know what, Mine? My goal is still higher than this.

Mine: ... When you say higher... do you mean the position of Patriarch of the Nishikiyama Family?

Kanda: That's true, but that's just a stepping stone. What I'm truly aiming for is even more than that...

To become the Seventh Chairman of the Tojo Clan!

Mine: The... Chairman?

Kanda: That's right. That naïve brat, Daigo Dojima, is not qualified to be the boss of the Tojo clan.

I’m more suitable. Don’t you agree, Mine?

Mine: ... Yes. That's right.

Kanda: When I become the chairman, I'll make you the Captain!

We're kyoudai for life! I’ll be counting on you, Mine!

Mine: Yes. I’ll be counting on you, too. Kanda-no-Aniki.

(Kanda-no-Aniki as the Chairman... that’s a pretty big step to take.)

(Daigo Dojima. I was going to find out what kind of a man he is...)

(Kyoudai for life...)

(Should I just follow along this guy?)

Enemy Yakuza: Kanda! Mine!!

Kanda: What, you bastards!?

Mine: These must be the yakuza who lost their territory to us.

Kanda: I see. You little fish never learn your lesson. Mine, stay back. I'll beat the crap out of these guys!

[Kanda beats them up.]

Enemy Yakuza: Uh, uuh...

Kanda: Hahaha! Did you think you little fish would be a match for Kanda-sama!?

Kanda's subordinate: That's my Aniki! You're the best fighter in the world!!

Kanda: Mine! Don't just think about running a business, you have to improve on your fighting skills too!

Mine: ... Yes. I will do my best.

 At the same time in the Nishikiyama Family office...

 Nishikiyama Family Member: ... Is that okay? That bastard Kanda, he seems to be getting carried away.

Second Acting Patriarch of the Nishikiyama Family: Of course not. You're the one who lost the position of Captain to that guy.

Nishikiyama Family Member: It's not just me. The Acting Patriarch is also in danger. That guy’s business lately has been brutal.

If we don’t do something, he’s really going to become the Patriarch...

2nd AP: Hey hey, you’ve gotta be kidding! Do you have any idea how many years I've been working for this Family?!

Nishikiyama Family Member: That’s true...

2nd AP: I say, we better do something about this while we still can...

 A few days later...

 [NISHIKIYAMA FAMILY OFFICE]

Mine: What? Chairman Dojima? He wants to see me?

Kanda: Yeah. He wants to talk to you in person.

Mine: What in the world... about what, I wonder?

Kanda: Scoldings and scoldings.

I got called in the other day too, and I was scolded for the way I’ve been making trouble around Kamurocho lately.

Mine: (I didn't expect the opportunity to come so soon.)

But why does he want to talk to me in person, what is the point of that?

Why doesn’t he just warn Kanda-no-Aniki, shouldn’t that be enough?

Kanda: Hmm. I dunno, but he's curious about your background, seems like he wants to talk about something like that.

Mine: ... My background? Is that so. I understand.

(Daigo Dojima. The time has finally come...)

___________________________________________

[IN FRONT OF THE TOJO CLAN HEADQUARTERS]

Mine: (A sudden call from Chairman Dojima...)

(The reason is probably to warn us about our recent behavior...)

(But Kanda-no-Aniki also told me he was interested in my background.)

(I never thought I'd get the chance to meet him in person so soon.)

(A man whose subordinates would give their lives for him... I’m going to find out what kind of a man he really is.)

 [THE SIXTH CHAIRMAN’S OFFICE]

[Door opening sound.]

Mine: Excuse me, please.

Daigo: ... You must be Mine. I've heard rumors about you.

I was told you’re quite outstanding. I heard you're a venture capitalist?

Mine: Yes. I'm the chairman of the company I founded...

Daigo: ... I see. I'm hoping that a different kind of member like you will bring in a new wind.

Mine: (I thought I would be scolded harshly for my recent actions in Kamurocho...)

(Are you really interested in me?)

Daigo: I do wonder, though. Why would a man with your career become a member of the yakuza?

Mine: That is...

Daigo: If you want to, could you tell me?

Mine: ... It’s...

I’ve been looking for something that I’m not sure if it even exists... I guess that’s what the reason is.

Daigo: ... Huh. That's an intriguing way of saying it.

So, have you found what you were looking for?

Mine: ... I’m not sure. It’s just...

I’m in a situation where I am not sure if what I have found is really what I was looking for.

Daigo: I see. I hope you can find it.

Mine: ...

Chairman Dojima. There is one thing I would like to ask you.

Daigo: What is it?

Mine: I heard that you were a civilian before you became Chairman.

Why, what were your thoughts, when you accepted the position of Chairman?

Daigo: ...

... Originally, it was to meet the expectations of those who had recommended me. But now...

Mine: Now?

Daigo: I’m trying to protect the people who are like family to me.

Mine: Family... is it?

Daigo: Yes. The people who belong to this Clan are all the kind of people who couldn’t get by in the regular world.

I used to be one of those people, too... it is difficult for all of them to live a normal life.

This Clan is a place where these people find a place to belong. For their sake, I want to protect that place.

... That's why I'm the Chairman.

Mine: (Family...)

Daigo: ...That's why, Mine. What you're doing right now is unacceptable.

Mine: !

Daigo: It is against our honor to fight and spill blood within the organization. Not to mention, it is outrageous to invade the territory of members of your own organization.

Mine: ....

Yes, that... may be a violation of honor.

However, as a result, the management of the third-tier organizations has improved, their income has increased, and their organizations have prospered.

Isn't some sacrifice inevitable for the greater good of the organization?

Daigo: I don't think so. Even if it's only a small sacrifice, I cannot ignore it.

From now on, I want you to desist from this.

Mine: ... Chairman Dojima. I understand. I will take this warning very seriously.

Daigo: ... Yes. I’m asking you to.

Mine: (I’m a little... disappointed. He’s the same as me. Or how I once was...)

(Living hanging onto an illusion of an organization like family, of unprecedented bonds...)

(So blinded by these illusions that we cannot see the big picture of the organization.)

(Is there really something about this man that makes his subordinates want to protect him even at the cost of their lives?)

 [STREET]

Mine: Well. Let's head to the restaurant where I was supposed to meet Kanda-no-Aniki.

[Gunshots.]

Mine: ! What? A gunshot?

Kanda: S-Stooop!!

Mine: Kanda-no-Aniki!?

[Mine runs to help.]

 [DIFFERENT STREET]

Yakuza: ...Tch. I missed...

Kanda: Whoa, what the hell are you doing!

Mine: Kanda-no-Aniki!! What the hell is...

Kanda: Mi-Mine? This guy just attacked me out of nowhere!

Yakuza: Damn. You’re in the way...

Mine: I think you’re a member of the tertiary organization of the Nishikiyama Family...

Kanda: What? This guy is one of our people?

Yakuza: Hey! You guys!

Yakuza: Kill them!

[They fight.]

Kanda: You bastards!! You’re from the tertiary organization of the Nishikiyama Family? Who paid you for this!?

Yakuza: Uhh... Guh... I-It... It was...

Kanda: Say it!!

[Kanda hits him.]

Yakuza: Guh...

Kanda: Answer me or I'll shoot you dead!!

Yakuza: ... It was the S-Second Acting Patriarch...

Kanda: What the fuck? It was him?

Yakuza: T-That's right! He gave me the order!

Kanda: T-That bastard... does he have any idea how much money we’re making!?

Mine: That’s probably why.

Kanda: What? What do you mean?

Mine: That man is nothing more than a substitute for the Patriarch. He doesn't have any achievements, and he doesn't make a lot of money.

In the meantime, Kanda-no-Aniki has been making an enormous amount of money. He must have thought that he’s in risk of losing his position.

Kanda: T-That bastard...

Mine: Really... you can never be too careful. Yakuza organizations are like that.

They talk about honor, but they will kill their own members without hesitation if it means protecting themselves.

Kanda: ... M-Mine! You're never gonna betray me, right!?

Mine: No. Of course not. Kanda-no-Aniki...

(But having said that, I'm afraid I'm in danger too.)

(... Well, what do we do now?)

 [ROOM]

Mine: Thank you very much for your time today.

Nishikiyama Family 2nd Acting Patriarch: ... Mine. What do you want to talk about?

Mine: I got surprised the other day. I was attacked out of the blue.

2nd AP: !

Mine: Is Kanda your target?

2nd AP: ... What are you talking about?

Mine: You don't have to play dumb. I know that Kanda was making you feel uneasy.

That man is after the position of Patriarch, right?

But... I’m not joking about getting involved in this.

2nd AP: ...! Mine, you... are you serious?

Mine: To tell you the truth, I'm also annoyed by Kanda's tyranny.

He calls me his kyoudai, but in reality he thinks of me as nothing more than a convenient money-maker.

2nd AP: Hah. That bastard Kanda, as always, seems to have no popularity.

Mine: He has that personality. It's not surprising.

Anyway... I do not want to be in danger because of Kanda.

So, Acting Second Patriarch. One thing I'd like to ask you...

Why don't you work with me to outsmart Kanda? Let's give him a good surprise.

2nd AP: What!?

Mine: I'm not going to sacrifice my own life. But as one would expect, this has a high risk.

2nd AP: Then, what are you going to do?

Mine: The Second Acting Patriarch should be able to make a bigger profit than that guy.

Enough to get you promoted to Patriarch.

2nd AP: Well, that's right. And how do you...

Mine: There is a big deal that Kanda and I have been working on. The deal was for 100 guns smuggled in from the mainland.

2nd AP: 1-100!?

Mine: That’s right. It’s going to bring us hundreds of millions as income. If you pay that to the Clan, you are certain to become a Patriarch.

And once that happens, you can expel Kanda.

Then we can say goodbye to that violent tyrant.

2nd AP: ... Huhuhuh. Mine, you are one evil bastard.

Mine: Hah. I'll take that as a compliment.

... Acting Patriarch. Please keep this a secret from the others, alright?

The next day.

At a warehouse in Tokyo Bay...

 [WAREHOUSE]

2nd AP: ... Mine. Kanda hasn’t found out about this, right?

Mine: No. I've told Kanda the transaction is next week.

2nd AP: Okay.

Mine: ... Acting Patriarch. It seems that our business partner has arrived.

Man in Black: You brought the money, right?

Mine: Yes. Here you go...

Man in Black: Okay... As for the goods, they are in that truck.

2nd AP: Let me check.

[Fade to black.]

2nd AP: Huhuhuh. This is amazing...

Man in Black: Well then, we're leaving...

Mine: Yes. Thank you for your time.

[Fade to black.]

2nd AP: Okay. Now all we have to do is sell this and...

Mine: I guess... it’s about time.

2nd AP: Hmm? About time for what?

Man's voice: Bastard, don’t you dare move!!

2nd AP: Hah, cops!? Why?

Mine: Thank you for your time. Now, I'll leave you to it...

Detective: ... Yes.

2nd AP: Wha-!? Hey, Mine!!

Mine: What is it? I'm just a well-meaning civilian who happened to be here on the scene and reported it.

2nd AP: Huh!?

I-It can’t be, Mine, you bastard... you set me up!?

And you involved that cop, too, didn’t you!?

Mine: Huh. I don't know what you're talking about.

2nd AP: ... S-Shit! I'm not gonna get caught!

[He runs away. He’s cut off by Kanda.]

Kanda: Whoa, don't let him get away.

2nd AP: K-Kanda!?

Kanda: It took a lot of effort to get those 100 guns. It would have been impossible if I didn't have so many connections.

2nd AP: Kanda, you bastard... You’re working with Mine too!?

Kanda: Heheheh. That's what I’m talking about.

That guy Mine doesn’t have the kind of connections in this world to work with the Organized Crime Division of the Police.

That's why I'm here to help.

2nd AP: D-Damn it...

Mine: Kanda-no-Aniki. The chitchat can wait. Let's hand this guy over to the cops quickly.

Kanda: I guess that’s true. Acting Patriarch, be quiet!

2nd AP: ... D-Damn it! If you bastards hand me over, I'll kill you all at once!!

[Fade to black. The Second Acting Patriarch got beat up.]

2nd AP: Hahh... Hahh...

Detective: Hey! Be quiet!

2nd AP: Hah... Hahh... I'm not gonna let you get me!!

Mine: Damn! That guy, he’s got a gun...

Detective: Hey! Don't do anything stupid!

[Gunshots.]

Detective: Guh... Gah...!!

[He collapses. The Second Acting Patriarch runs away.]

Kanda: You bastard!! Wait!!

Mine: Kanda-no-Aniki!! It's dangerous. The other guy has a gun.

Kanda: Tch...

Mine: Letting him get away is a mistake but... I’m sure that the police will be able to catch him.

He shot a policeman. He’s not going to get away with it.

Kanda: That’s true. Hey, Minamida, are you alive?

Detective: ... K-Kanda. C-Can you call an ambulance, quickly?

 [DOCKS]

[Siren noises in the background.]

Mine: Losing the gun trafficking route is a hard blow, but there was more to be gained from it.

The confiscation of 100 guns. It's a big achievement for the Organized Crime Division, and they owe us a big favour now. And in addition...

Kanda: Yes. Now the obstacle is gone.

Mine: This was also because of Kanda-no-Aniki’s collaboration.

Kanda: ... Yeah. I had to cross a dangerous line this time. I broke out in a cold sweat.

But, Kyoudai... you did it because you believed in your plan, right?

Mine, thank you for teaming up with me and not with that guy.

Mine: ... Kanda-no-Aniki.

Kanda: Mine. We're Kyoudai for life. Let's take the top of the Tojo Clan together!

Mine: Yes. I will be happy to accompany you. Until the end.

(Certainly, that man is an fool, and he's rough and a thug. But...)

(With this man, I might find a new reason to live.)

 [NISHIKIYAMA FAMILY OFFICE]

Kanda: All right!! You guys, clench your teeth! One hit in the morning, to wake up your fighting spirit!

Kanda's underlings: Yes, Boss! Please!

Kanda: Oraa!

[Kanda slaps his subordinate.]

Kanda's subordinate A: Ugh-!

Kanda: Oraa!

[Kanda slaps his subordinate.]

Kanda's subordinate B: Kuh-!

Kanda: Oraa!

[Kanda slaps his subordinate.]

Kanda's subordinate C: Geh-!

Kanda: Oraa!

[Kanda slaps his subordinate.]

Kanda's subordinate D: Uuh-!

Kanda: Oraa!

[Kanda tries to slap Mine. Mine dodges.]

Kanda: Hey! Mine! Don't dodge it!

Mine: Kanda-no-Aniki. Is it necessary to do this every morning?

Kanda: Of course! It's a wake-up call! Don't dodge it tomorrow!!

Mine: Hah...

Kanda: All right, you guys, go out there and make some money today! And don't show any mercy for anyone who gets in your way!

Let them realize how terrifying the Nishikiyama Family is!!

Kanda's underlings: Yes!

Mine: (Since Kanda-no-Aniki took over as the Patriarch, the line of violence has been expanding...)

(Our income has increased enormously, but... we’re going to get scolded by Chairman Dojima again...)

 [STREET]

Middle-aged Man: What do you mean the promissory note has become invalid!? What about the promised compensation for eviction of 30 million!?

Mine: I apologize for the inconvenience. The Daikyu Company, the intermediary between us, has went bankrupt.

Middle-aged Man: Y-You've got to be kidding me!! I've only got paid 6 million in advance!!

Mine: ... That’s what I’ve been told. I'm only a negotiator...

Middle-aged Man: You've been planning the bankruptcy from the start, haven’t you!? I know how you bastards do your business!

[Some gangster-looking guys show up.]

Mine: Who are these people?

Middle-aged Man: They’re bodyguards. At least leave the money you have on you right now with me!

[Mine beats them up.]

Yakuza: ... Guh... S-Strong...

[He collapses.]

Mine: Do you still want to do this?

Middle-aged Man: E-Eek!

[He runs away.]

Mine: (Now this property is ours, too... Kanda-no-Aniki will be pleased to hear that.)

[Mine’s phone buzzes. He takes the call.]

Mine: ... Yes. Eh? Chairman Dojima? I understand.

Good grief. The scolding came immediately.

 [THE SIXTH CHAIRMAN’S OFFICE]

Mine: Chairman Dojima, how can I help you today?

Daigo: You should already know that. It’s about how you guys make your money.

Kanda’s acting self-importantly, but you're the one managing from behind the scenes, aren't you?

Mine: No, that’s not true...

Daigo: Anyway... in spite of my previous warning, you guys have not improved your behavior in the slightest.

Mine, there won't be a next time, do you understand?

Mine: !

Daigo: If you continue this way, I will have to take some sort of punishment into consideration.

Mine: ... I understand. I will take this warning very seriously.

(This is bad. We really went too far...)

(I'll have to figure out how to make more income in the future.)

Daigo: But, Mine. It's not just the trouble in the organization that I'm worried about. It's your safety.

Mine: Safety?

Daigo: Yes. Even if the Patriarch agrees to switch to a different parent organization, that’s not always the case with their subordinates.

In fact, I've heard that some people with a grudge against you have been resorting to violence against you.

Mine. If you keep this up, you're going to get yourself killed one day, you understand?

Mine: ... I'm well aware of the danger.

However, as long as I am living in the world of organized crime, I believe that some violence is inevitable.

Daigo: Hah. You've got a lot of guts for a guy who used to be a civilian until recently.

But, be careful. I've been in this world for a while now, and I have experienced it. The world of the yakuza is truly a den of thieves...

If you're not careful, you'll end up getting slashed from behind. And it's not just the enemy. You have to be careful with your own people, too.

Mine: ... Chairman Dojima. Even so, I think I'm a good judge of character.

I’m very careful, especially when it comes to untrustworthy people. You have nothing to worry about.

Daigo: I see.

Mine: Thank you very much for your advice. I will also be mindful of today’s warning.

... Well, I'm going back to work.

Daigo: ...

 [NISHIKYAMA FAMILY OFFICE]

Kanda: Oh, Mine! You're back! Finally, we did it!

Mine: Kanda-no-Aniki? What's going on?

Kanda: 700 Million in payments to the headquarters... are this month's income!

Mine: Oh... 700 million?...

Kanda: Heheheh. If I deliver this, the headquarters will have to recognize my power.

The promotion to Assistant Chief of Headquarters is finally in sight.

Mine: ... There is one concern, though...

Kanda: What?

Mine: Earlier, I was called in by Chairman Dojima again, and he lectured me about our methods.

"There won’t be a next time, be ready to get a punishment," is what he said.

Kanda: Yeah. I've been told that too.

Right, but I'm sure that if we pay this money to the Clan, he'll calm down.

After all, the Tojo Clan is currently in trouble with money because of the war with the Omi Alliance.

If he’s confronted with this amount of money, he’ll have to accept our way of doing things after all.

Mine: ... Indeed, I suppose you’re right.

(Yes. People change when they have a lot of money in front of them.)

(He said that it's like family, and that honor is important and such things... but I'm sure that he's no exception.)

 _________________________________________________

 [INSIDE OF A CAR]

[The car starts to drive.]

Kanda: Haah. I don't wanna bow to Chairman Dojima's face month after month at the officers’ meeting.

Mine: He’s got his eyes on us. It’s natural that you would feel uneasy.

Kanda: Haah, it's so gloomy.

Mine: However, Kanda-no-Aniki, Chairman Dojima’s attitude should also change once we offer the 700 million yen.

Kanda: Yeah, right. With that, I’m finally getting the position of Assistant Chief of Headquarters...

[Tires screeching.]

Kanda: ... Whoa!

Mine: W-What is it!? Why did we stop!?

Driver Yakuza: E-Err. Well, there are some shady guys...

Mine: Who are they?

 [DOCKS/SOME KIND OF WAREHOUSE]

Kanda: What are you idiots doing!!

... Ah, you bastard are...

2nd AP: Long time no see, Kanda. And Mine...

Mine: The Second Acting Patriarch...

Kanda: You seem to be trying to run away still. Do you think you can get away with shooting a cop?

2nd AP: Yes. If I had the money, I could. If only I had the money...

Mine: (Money? It can’t be...)

2nd AP: I know you guys have the money to pay to the Clan with you today. I heard you've been making a lot of cash lately?

I'll use it to flee the country. Hand it over.

Kanda: Like hell I will! I need this money to become the Assistant Chief of Headquarters!

Who the hell would give it to a bastard like you!

2nd AP: Ahh. I suppose you’re right. That is why I'm going to take it from you by force.

[Some thugs show up.]

Kanda: W-What’s with these guys?

2nd AP: These are people who have a grudge against you, just like me.

Go on, kill them!

[They fight.]

Mine: Haah... Haah... these guys, there's no end to them.

2nd AP: Oraa! Kanda! Die!

Mine: Aniki! Watch out!

[Mine takes the hit for Kanda.]

Mine: ... Guh!

Kanda: M-Mine!?

Mine: Kanda-no-Aniki, we are indeed outnumbered. At this rate, it's only a matter of time before we're killed.

That payment of 700 million... If we can somehow use that to persuade him...

Kanda: T-That’s right, but that's the money I need to become the Assistant Chief of Headquarters...

Mine: But there’s no replacing life. Things like money, you can make again just fine.

Kanda: It's not that easy to make that much money!

Besides, now that I’m being watched by the Chairman... I can't make money the rough way like before.

This money is my ticket to success! I can't just hand it over!

Mine: B-But...

Kanda: ...

Mine. The younger brother protects the older brother. Of course that’s how it works, right?

Mine: Huh?

Kanda: You've done a great job until now. Thanks to you, the Family’s business is stable.

So now, I can continue without you. It’s okay now.

Mine: Kanda-no-Aniki? What...

[Mine gets hit.]

Mine: Ggh...!

Kanda: Mine! The offering for him is you! I'll take the money!

Mine: (Well, with me as a shield...!!)

2nd AP: Hey!! Wait, Kanda!

Kanda: Like hell I’ll wait! You dumbass!

[The car starts and drives away]

2nd AP: Shit! That bastard Kanda!

Mine: Dammit... Kanda-no-Aniki. Why...

2nd AP: Unfortunately I didn’t get the money... revenge it is, then! I'll make you bastard suffer plenty for it!

Mine: ...

[The Second Acting Patriarch beats Mine up.]

2nd AP: Haah. I hit him and hit him. I didn't get the money, but I'm feeling much better. Hey, Mine?

Mine: ...

(Again... I was betrayed. Now... once again...)

2nd AP: ... Do you have any last words to say?

Mine: ... I have... none... If you're going to kill me, kill me quickly.

2nd AP: Is that so. Then... Die.

Mine: (I was a fool. After all, this world is...)

(Full of lies.)

Man's voice: ... Mine. There you are...

[Daigo shows up.]

Mine: Huh... Chairman Dojima?

2nd AP: W-What the hell?

Mine: Chairman Dojima, why are you here?

Daigo: Kanda came late to the executive meeting. He was acting strange, so I confronted him about it and he told me.

That you guys were attacked. Even about the incident that started it all.

Mine: Here... What are you doing here...?

Daigo: Second Acting Patriarch. Could you please forgive Mine?

2nd AP: W-What... now...

Daigo: I'm not saying for free. I've prepared one billion for you.

You can use this to fund your escape. You needed money, didn't you?

2nd AP: A b-billion?

Mine: C-Chairman. That money is...?

Daigo: I was able to persuade the officers to let me take this month’s payment.

As you can imagine, there was vehement protest...

...But I can't replace your life.

Mine: !

Daigo: ... Phew. Good grief. This is going to increase the opposition from within the Clan again.

Here, the car keys. The money is in the trunk.

[The Second Acting Patriarch checks the trunk.]

2nd AP: Heh, heheh. Amazing, the money’s there...

Daigo: With this, you can forget about Mine. All right?

2nd AP: ... Chairman Dojima. I'm very grateful for this money. However...

This guy caused me a lot of trouble!

Thanks to him, I'm a murderer on the run!! My wife and kids are gone too!

I've got to kill him, sorry!

Mine: Uh...

2nd AP: Die! Mine!!

Daigo: Stop it-!!

[Gunshots.]

Daigo: ... Kuh...

Mine: What, Chairman Dojima? Protecting me?

Daigo: ... Mine, are you alright?

Mine: ...

2nd AP: O-Oh, oh, ohh... Oh dammit. I shot... the Chairman...

Now... I've got no choice but to kill you both!

Mine: ... You bastard...

What do you think you’re doing, huh!!

[Mine beats him up.]

Mine: Haah... Haah... Haah...

2nd AP: Guh... Shit....

[He collapses.]

Mine: Chairman Dojima!

Daigo: Kuh. I got shot in the side...

Mine: I-Immediately, an ambulance...!!

[Ambulance sirens.]

Mine: (Chairman Dojima, why? Why would you do this for me?)

 The next day...

 [HOSPITAL]

Mine: Chairman...

Daigo: Mine. Thank you for coming here. But they’re letting me leave the hospital already. The bullet only grazed my side, it looks like I avoided a fatal wound.

... I think I got lucky.

Mine: ... Why?

Daigo: Why...?

Mine: Why did you, the Sixth Chairman of the Tojo Clan, save a single member like me?

Not to mention preparing such a large amount of money...

Daigo: ...

Hey, Mine. Is it so strange to protect a friend?

Mine: Huh...

Daigo: Isn't that natural? At least that's what I believe.

Mine: ... That might be the case, but... to the point of risking your life?

I've been betrayed so many times in my life. By the people I have trusted...

And from your point of view, I must have been a problem child who didn't even listen to you.

I don’t understand why you’d risk your life for me...

Daigo: ... Mine. I thought I told you.

The members of this Clan are like family to me. That’s why, as the Chairman, it’s my duty to protect that family.

... You're no exception.

Mine: I'm... family?

Daigo: ... Yes. That's what I think. So I only did what was reasonable.

Well, Mine. Is it really so strange?

Mine: ...

(I...)

(Maybe I... was wrong.)

[Kanda comes in.]

Kanda: Chairman! Are you okay!? ... Woah, Mine!

Mine: ...

Kanda: Heh, heheh. You're looking well. Heh, heheheh...

Mine: ...

Kanda-san. You saved my life that time.

Kanda: Huh?

Mine: You pretended to run away from there to let the headquarters know I was in danger, right?

Kanda: ... R-Right! That’s right! Mine, you got it!

Hahahaha! As expected from my kyoudai!

Mine: (For now... this is fine. He still has a use. At least... for now.)

... By the way, Chairman Dojima. Kanda-no-Aniki. I actually have one thing to discuss with you.

Daigo: Discuss?

Kanda: Huh, anything you want, kyoudai!

Mine: It's about what I’m going to do in the future.

Then, after some time has passed...

 [THE SIXTH CHAIRMAN’S OFFICE]

Daigo: Hakuho Clan, huh... That’s a good name, Mine.

Mine: Thank you very much.

Daigo: Anyway, I don’t know how Kanda accepted your independence.

Mine: Well, it seems that Kanda-no-Aniki had some plans of his own...

But well, it’s his matter. I'm sure he plans to treat me like an underling from now on.

Daigo: Hah. Well, don’t overdo it.

Mine: Yes. But... Are you sure this is really alright?

Daigo: What is it?

Mine: I’m suddenly becoming the leader of a directly subsidiary Clan... this seems too early to talk about for a newcomer like me.

Daigo: Hah. And what would that make me, then?

Mine: ... I apologize.

Daigo: That was a joke. Considering what you've contributed so far, it’s not that inappropriate.

In addition, you're a little dangerous... I better keep you within my sight.

Mine: That... I’m sorry about that. I will change from now on.

Daigo: More importantly, are you sure about this?

You can still turn back now. ... You don’t have to become a Yakuza if you don’t want to.

Mine: Yes, you're right. ... But I've already made up my mind.

Because finally, I was able to find it.

— Exactly what I've been looking for.

Daigo: Is that so. All right. I'll exchange it with you, then. A parent-child-sakazuki.

Mine: Please do.

(Yes. I have finally found it. A new reason to live. A true bond...)

(Daigo Dojima. I'm going to live for this man.)

(For as long as this life is...)

--The End--

Thank you for reading!

[fatliberation]

I’m Abandoning Body Positivity and Here’s Why

In short: it’s fatphobic.

“A rallying cry for a shift in societal norms has now become the skinny girl’s reassurance that she isn’t really fat. Fatness, through this lens of ‘body positivity’, remains the worst thing a person can be.” (Kayleigh Donaldson)

•  •  •

I have always had a lot of conflicting opinions about the body positivity movement, but it’s much more widely known (and accepted, go figure) than the fat liberation movement, so I often used the two terms interchangeably in conversation about anti-fatness. But the longer I’ve been following the body positivity movement, the more I’ve realized how much it has strayed from its fat lib origins. It has been hijacked; deluded to center thin, able, white, socially acceptable bodies.

Bopo’s origins are undoubtedly grounded in fat liberation. The fat activists of the 1960s paved the way for the shred of size acceptance we see in media today, initially protesting the discrimination and lack of access to equal opportunities for fat people specifically. This early movement highlighted the abuse, mental health struggles, malpractice in the medical field, and called for equal pay, equal access, equal respect, an end to fatphobic structures and ideas. It saddens me that it hasn’t made much progress in those regards. 

Today, the #bopo movement encapsulates more the idea of loving your own body versus ensuring that individuals regardless of their weight and appearance are given equal opportunities in the workplace, schools, fashion and media. Somehow those demands never made it outside of the ‘taboo’ category, and privileged people would much more readily accept the warm and fuzzy, sugar-coated message of “love yourself!” But as @yrfatfriend once said, this idea reduces fat people’s struggles to a problem of mindset, rather than a product of external oppressors that need to be abolished in order for fat people to live freely.

That generalized statement, “love yourself,” is how a movement started by fat people for the rights of fat people was diluted so much, it now serves a thin model on Instagram posting about how she has a tummy roll and cellulite on her thighs - then getting praised for loving her body despite *gasp!* its minor resemblance to a fat body. 

Look. Pretty much everyone has insecurities about their bodies, especially those of us who belong to marginalized groups. If you don’t have body issues, you’re a privileged miracle, but our beauty-obsessed society has conditioned us to want to look a certain way, and if we have any features that the western beauty standard considers as “flaws,” yeah! We feel bad about it! So it’s not surprising that people who feel bad about themselves would want to hop on a movement that says ‘hey, you’re beautiful as you are!’ That’s a message everyone would like to hear. Any person who has once thought of themselves as less than beautiful now feels that this movement is theirs. And everyone has insecurities, so everyone feels entitled to the safe space. And when a space made for a minority includes the majority, the cycle happens again and the majority oppresses the minority. What I’m trying to explain here is that thin people now feel a sense of ownership over body positive spaces. 

Regardless of how badly thin people feel about their bodies, they still experience thin privilege. They can sit down in a theater or an airplane without even thinking about it, they can eat in front of others without judgement, they can go the doctor with a problem and actually have it fixed right away, they can find cute clothes in their size with ease, they do not suffer from assumptions of laziness/failure based on stereotype, they see their body type represented everywhere in media, the list goes on and on. They do not face discrimination based off of the size of their body. 

Yet diet culture and fatphobia affects everyone, and of course thin people do still feel bad about the little fat they have on their bodies. But the failure to examine WHY they feel bad about it, is what perpetuates fatphobia within the bopo movement. They’re labeled “brave” for showing a pinch of chub, yet fail to address what makes it so acceptably daring, and how damaging it is to people who are shamed for living in fat bodies. Much like the rest of society, thin body positivity is still driven by the fear of fat, and does nothing to dismantle fatphobia within structures or within themselves.

Evette Dionne sums it up perfectly in her article, “The Fragility of Body Positivity: How a Radical Movement Lost Its Way.”

“The body-positive media economy centers these affirming, empowering, let-me-pinch-a-fat-roll-to-show-how-much-I-love-myself stories while failing to actually challenge institutions to stop discriminating against fat people. More importantly, most of those stories center thin, white, cisgender, heterosexual women who have co-opted the movement to build their brands. Rutter has labeled this erasure ‘Socially Acceptable Body Positivity.’

“On social media, it actually gets worse for fat bodies: We’re not just being erased from body positivity, fat women are being actively vilified. Health has become the stick with which to beat fat people with [sic], and the benchmark for whether body positivity should include someone” (Dionne).

Ah, yes. The medicalization of fat bodies, and the moralization of health. I’ve ranted about this before. Countless comments on posts of big women that say stuff like “I’m all for body positivity, but this is just unhealthy and it shouldn’t be celebrated.” I’ve heard writer/activist Aubrey Gordon once say that body positivity has become something like a shield for anti-fatness. It’s anti-fatness that has been repackaged as empowerment. It’s a striking double-standard. Fat people are told to be comfortable in their bodies (as if that’s what’s going to fix things) but in turn are punished when they’re okay with being fat. Make it make sense.

Since thin people feel a sense of ownership over body positive spaces, and they get to hide behind “health” when they are picking and choosing who can and cannot be body positive, they base it off of who looks the most socially acceptable. And I’m sure they aren’t consciously picking and choosing, it comes from implicit bias. But the socially acceptable bodies they center are small to medium fat, with an hourglass shape. They have shaped a new beauty standard specifically FOR FAT PEOPLE. (Have you ever seen a plus sized model with neck fat?? I’m genuinely asking because I have yet to find one!) The bopo movement works to exclude and silence people who are on the largest end of the weight spectrum. 

Speaking of exclusion, let’s talk about fashion for a minute.

For some reason, (COUGH COUGH CAPITALISM) body positivity is largely centered around fashion. And surprise surprise, it’s still not inclusive to fat people. Fashion companies get a pat on the back for expanding their sizing two sizes up from what they previously offered, when they are still leaving out larger fat people completely. In general, clothing companies charge more for clothes with more fabric, so people who need the largest sizes are left high and dry. It’s next to impossible to find affordable clothes that also look nice. Fashion piggybacks on the bopo movement as a marketing tactic, and exploits the very bodies it claims to be serving. (Need I mention the time Urban Outfitters used a "curvy” model to sell a size it doesn’t even carry?)

The movement also works to exclude and silence fat Black activists.

In her article, “The Body Positivity Movement Both Takes From and Erases Fat Black Women” Donyae Coles explains how both white people and thin celebrities such as Jameela Jamil profit from the movement that Black women built.

“Since long before blogging was a thing, fat Black women have been vocal about body acceptance, with women like Sharon Quinn and Marie Denee, or the work of Sonya Renee Taylor with The Body Is Not An Apology. We’ve been out here, and we’re still here, but the overwhelming face of the movement is white and thin because the mainstream still craves it, and white and thin people have no problem with profiting off the work of fat, non-white bodies.”

“There is a persistent belief that when thin and/or white people enter the body positive realm and begin to repeat the messages that Black women have been saying for years in some cases, when they imitate the labor that Black women have already put in that we should be thankful that they are “boosting” our message. This completely ignores the fact that in doing so they are profiting off of that labor. They are gaining the notoriety, the mark of an expert in something they learned from an ignored Black woman” (Coles).

My next essay will go into detail about this and illuminate key figures who paved the way for body acceptance in communities of color. 

The true purpose of this movement has gotten completely lost. So where the fuck do we go from here? 

We break up with it, and run back to the faithful ex our parents disapproved of. We go back to the roots of the fat liberation movement, carved out for us by the fat feminists, the queer fat activists, the fat Black community, and the allies it began with. Everything they have preached since the 1960s and 70s is one hundred percent applicable today. We get educated. We examine diet culture through a capitalist lens. We tackle thin, white-supremacist systems and weight based discrimination, as well as internalized bias. We challenge our healthcare workers to unlearn their bias, treat, and support fat patients accordingly. We make our homes and spaces accessible and welcoming to people of any size, or any (dis)ability. “We must first protect and uplift people in marginalized bodies, only then can we mandate self-love” (Gordon).

Think about it. In the face of discrimination, mistreatment, and emotional abuse, we as a society are telling fat people to love their bodies, when we should be putting our energy toward removing those fatphobic ideas and structures so that fat people can live in a world that doesn’t require them to feel bad about their bodies. It’s like hitting someone with a rock and telling them not to bruise!

While learning to love and care for the body that you’re in is important, I think that body positivity also fails in teaching that because it puts even more emphasis on beauty. Instead of saying, “you don’t have to be ‘beautiful’ to be loved and appreciated,” its main lesson is that “all bodies are beautiful.” We live in a society obsessed with appearance, and it is irresponsible to ignore the hierarchy of beauty standards that exist in every space. Although it should be relative, “beautiful” has been given a meaning. And that meaning is thin, abled, symmetric, and eurocentric. 

Beauty and ugliness are irrelevant, made-up constructs. People will always be drawn to you no matter what, so you deserve to exist in your body without struggling to conform to an impossible and bigoted standard. Love and accept your body for YOURSELF AND NO ONE ELSE, because you do not exist to please the eyes of other people. That’s what I wish we were teaching instead. Radical self acceptance!

As of today, the ultimate message of the body positivity movement is: Love your body “despite its imperfections.” Or people with “perfect and imperfect bodies both deserve love.” As long as we are upholding the notion that there IS a perfect body that looks a certain way, and every body that falls outside of that category is imperfect, we are upholding white supremacy, eugenics, anti-fatness, and ableism.

[kim-chann]

﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

   ❝   Stranger  ❞   –   Chef’s Special

           - - - | Satoru Gojo

             - - - | TW: Blood, brief mention of death

      Synopsis ;; Satoru Gojo killed you. He regrets it. 

                                   ﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏ $ 0.00

༺ Chef’s Note: Hi. It’s been like five months hahaha.

She was a stranger to his eyes. 

The word “stranger,” was used to describe people whom you don’t know. It’s a term you use when you walk past a stranger at the park. You don’t know their name, how many siblings they have, their shoe size, their favorite color-- anything specific that leaves your mind blank to who they are. They have no emotional value to you, despite the small eye contact and the curve of one's lips in a silent way to greet one another. Then walk past them to never see them in your life again. 

Yet, in his eyes, staring at the person that he’s known since his youth, felt like he was staring at a stranger. 

A grip on his chest felt like weight building up and over his body, making it difficult to let in air and out. It felt like a sin to even stand. 

He was mad at himself. 

He was mad at himself that he can’t feel anything towards her but guilt.

No relief, no happiness, not even letting the smallest inside jokes slip from their mouths. 

All the memories in his head of her felt foggy. It was as if someone breathed through their mouth on a glass to fog up. He was just waiting for the fog to disappear so the emotions he wanted to feel would shine through to tell her the truth, straight from the bottom of his heart. 

“You’re late, Satoru,” She finally spoke. “By eight minutes.”

“The usual,” He makes no move to bicker like they’ve always done. 

“Well, are you just going to stand there? It seems like you want to say something.”

Satoru hesitated, “Look, (Y/n), I’m sorry--”

“Save it.” She interrupts. “I don’t want to spend my time here listening to you pour your heart out to me while I should be doing that to you.”

“No, you don’t understand--”

“I do.”

“(Y/n), you don’t,” Satoru grits his teeth, “You don’t, you really don’t.”

“Then make me understand…!” (Y/n) whines through a desperate sigh from her lips. She was beginning to lose her patience with him. 

It didn’t go unnoticed by Satoru. Her clenched jaw, her fingers picked one another, her eyes fierce, and her cheeks flared. It still surprised him how he still notices the littlest things about her even when his feelings were dazed. 

His mouth opened, closed, then he licked his lips. Words were difficult to form from the look she gave him. With the weight against his chest, it made his eyes blurry from the overwhelming pause from his emotions.

“I didn’t mean it,” A mutter broke the tension.

“Then why did you do it?”

“I don’t know.”

She let out a laugh. One would mistaken it for a genuine humour-like laugh, but in the case of the current scenario, it would mirror the opposite. “You come to me to talk and you can’t even do it,” The humorless expression never left her pale face, “It’s almost sad to think about, for someone who thinks of me as a stranger.”

“What?”

“I may be an idiot, but I’m not stupid. I notice how you act around me, Satoru.” 

Satoru felt his nerves freeze. 

“I’m not oblivious enough to notice the way that you brush me off everytime we pass each other. You don’t smile the same way as you did, you don’t even look at me in the eye when we talk, you ignore me in front of everyone--”

“I didn’t mean too--”

“You don’t even thank me when I do you a favor that you asked for, you don’t even take up my offer for lunch anymore, you’re beginning to ditch me at the last second, you’re starting to look at me as if we never knew each other!”

“I’m sorry! I--”

“No! You don’t get a say in this!” Her voice screamed pain. He was used to the sounds of screams nor did it affect him to an extent, yet the tone of her voice made him feel like his neck was pressed against a guillotine. The pressure he felt was suffocating, it was getting harder and harder to breathe each passing second. 

Tears pooled down his blue eyes, eyebrows furrowed, teeth grit as he broke down. The feeling of struggling to breathe was already bad enough. He was a tall man, one who got jokes from people, “how’s the weather up there?,” on which he would always respond with, “Good, how’s the weather down there?” Yet the sudden swarm of emotions made the tall man fall down on his knees and beg. Being a tall man only meant others struggled to reach him physically or emotionally. The buck of his knees finally made him short, tiny, a scum of the earth. Like an ant walking among humans. 

The fog on the glass finally cleared. 

The value of his memories anguished in powerful emotions struck him all at once as if he was a punching bag. The twelve years of his cherished memories all came into his brain. From the widest smiles that his cheeks can make with her, the anger in his chest that bubbled like water at its boiling point from stupid arguments they made, the smell of fresh wet grass as it painted their skin, the happiest memories now torn down from the tension between the two companions. The stranger in front of him that he once loved made him feel conflicted. His vision was blurry from the tears that gushed from his eyes and the song that he sang of sorrow. He weaved and struggled to form coherent sentences but spit out, “I’m sorry”s and “I didn’t mean it.”

“Did I do something wrong?” (Y/n) managed to ask between Satoru’s sobs. “Did I do something wrong to deserve this?”

“No-- nothing!”

“Then why did you kill me?”

“I didn’t mean it!”

“I tried my best to help you and even sacrificed everything to help you, what did I do wrong?” 

Every word she spoke, the more glass that shattered his already-so broken heart. Tearing a scar and opening it back up the wound that took years to grow made him feel that the only retribution was his death. His body felt weak against the pavement, cheeks defiled with the saltiness of regret and hands besmirched, tinged, similar to the healthiest rose in the garden.

“You did nothing wrong! I-I don’t know why I did it!” He screamed. 

Satoru’s cries echoed throughout the derelict edifice. There were things quieter than a desert with no wind, pressing pressure against your ears from the sudden ringing that screamed. Your brain trying to process anything within your range, a desperate feeling of wanting to hear something, anything, to give itself reassurance of life. 

Yet, the silence before him was mute, immobile and desolate to the point where even the flutter of one's eyelid was enough to make Satoru happy. His hands matched the tinge of roses as for the pavement on the ground below him. Her body laid, immobile, eyes peeking hidden by still eyelids that didn’t dare blink. Satoru pulled her closer to him, head between his arms, cradling her as if she was a child. 

It was quiet, too quiet. 

Not even the scream that shook the walls was enough to make (Y/n) hear him.

[greensaplinggrace]

honestly THANK YOU for saying all that abt baghra bc i thought i was going crazy from not liking her??? bc i haven't read the books and only summaries of them on wiki and like. i dunno why ppl like her actually even in the show bc this guy, her son, is like "i wanna make the world better for us grisha" and she's just like "no." even tho he sees that she's MAKING HERSELF SICK from suppressing her powers! she's literally like in bed coughing in the flashback yet seem much healthier at the little palace. also like after everything, after her disapproval, after the fold, after centuries of waiting for the sun summoner.. he never abandons her. he makes sure she's cares for. he doesn't harm her. and i have to wonder if baghra has ever thanks him for that, for just not leaving her alone. like i dunno how im suppose ro believe aleks is a heartless villain when he still cares for his abusive mom like this. like has baghra even told her she loved him (honestly she reminds me of a classic emotionally unavailable asian parent but maybe that's just me). also im wondering if baghra ever told aleks that he had an aunt.. bc like.. now that u bring up her isolating him it's like hmmmm...

not at me being like alina... why do u trust the bitter old woman who literally beats u with a stick and verbally abuses u every chance she gets.. just bc she showed a bad painting... like.. pls use two braincells to see that who u figured out as his mother... is also using his protection..

like baghra could've upped and left with alina. but no. she stayed bc she knew she was safe under aleks's protection.

alsoim just impressed that after his first friend tried to drown him and harvest his bones... he didn't go into hiding???? he still wanted to make a safe heaven for grisha!!! HE STILL WANTED TO PROTECT GRISHA EVEN AFTER HIS GRISHA FRIEND TRIED TO KILL HIM FOR HIS FUCKEN BONES. like... this is the guy im suppose to believe is the villain???

honestly i feel like part of the reason why LB's plotlines seem so bad and disconnected (and sometimes outright racist but that's another rant) and why darkles is disproportionately more violent and villainous in the later books is bc she didn't expect the darkling to be so popular and wanted to stick with her guns of making him the villain. but also wanted the money from aleks's popularity. but like you can't have ur cake and eat it too.

Well thank you for sending this ask! It's very sweet and very passionate. I'm glad you liked my post! I didn't put as much thought into it as some of my others lol. I kind of just talked. But it was nice to be able to finally talk about some of the problems I have with both her character and the fandom/author's perception of her.

HERE is the post this is referring to, in case anyone's wondering.

👀👀 You've hit the nail on the head for so many things, here!

Baghra is extremely emotionally unavailable, basically to the point of neglect. She's also verbally and physically abusive, traits which I doubt were only reserved for her students and not her son. Baghra claims she would do anything to protect him, but I've known a lot of parents who have that mindset and yet still harm their children because they think it's "good for them".

Aleksander stays at Baghra's side for years, and even when they're opposing each other she's never too far away from him. Idk if you've read the books but he does eventually hurt her. And as much as I don't like Baghra, I think his actions were horrid. But I'm also honestly kind of surprised it took him so long lmao.

Yeah I mean, in terms of isolation, let's not forget that she never wanted to introduce him to his father, either. Baghra's sense of eternity clouds a lot of her judgments on relationships, which means she views most people as dust and therefore teaches her son to as well. The problem with that is that he's a growing child, and he needs those social and emotional attachments for healthy development.

I would bet quite a bit of money that Baghra has either never told him she loves him or she has told him so few times it's practically forgettable.

And everything becomes more complicated because so many of Baghra's actions are understandable because of her life and her history, but the impacts they have on the people around her, especially Aleksander, are permanently damaging. And the fact that that's never gone over in critical depth in the books or how it's glossed over in fandom is just very disconcerting. Like, acknowledging Baghra's failings doesn't mean we're excusing Aleksander's actions, it just means we're holding Baghra liable for her own. Which the fandom should be doing, considering she's the epitome of an abusive parental figure.

And Alina trusting Baghra over Aleksander is even more confusing! Especially in the show!! This is the woman who beat her and abused her and tortured her friends when they tiny little children (and who probably still does so now that they're adults). This is the woman who mocks you and harasses you and insults you on a regular basis. Why does Baghra revealing she's Aleksander's mother make Alina change her mind?! Like fuck, I'd just feel bad for Aleksander. No wonder he kept it a secret, I would too! And that painting is enough evidence?! Really?! A random painting shown to you by this abusive mentor that's been making your life hell. That's what you're going to betray your new lover over?

The friends trying to harvest his bones thing is a good point, too. I think Aleksander, especially show Aleksander, is incredibly idealistic. I think he cares too much for others - those he's deemed worth his care (a sentiment given to him by Baghra). Despite everything she's tried to teach him about hiding and abandoning others and never caring and never doing anything to help or reach out or connect with people, Aleksander still continues to do so. It's likely because he never got it from Baghra growing up, and so is desperate for those emotional needs to be fulfilled elsewhere.

His turning point, when Baghra tells him it was understandable that those kids tried to kill him because the world is such a hard place for them - that's crucial. And the reason it's possible as a motivating factor is because of that idealism and that desire to help and that desire to be everything his mother isn't. Baghra tells him this trauma he just experienced was because of the oppression of his people, and instead of following her lead and accepting that, going into hiding and abandoning everybody to their misery, he goes I can do something about that. I can make it so this never happens again. Which is usually how trauma like that combines with one's core personality traits at a young age, especially when there's none of the essential support systems in place to aid in recovery (ie, the role Baghra should have been filling but wasn't, because she decided to exacerbate the problem instead).

And yeah, one of my biggest problems with the ham-fisted "beating you over the head with a sledgehammer of evil deeds" look-how-bad-this-character-is! portrayal of the Darkling in the later books comes from the impression I get that Bardugo doesn't trust her readers. She's so desperate to have us hate this character and think him an irredeemable villain, not trusting any of her readers to engage critically with a morally gray character, that it feels quite a bit like condescending fucking bullshit. Which ew, I know how to engage with literature, thanks.

She really does seem to look down on a large part of her fandom, and imo, the infantilization of the female characters in her books seems to carry over to her impression of most of her female readers as well. Which is why the Darkling's character arc gets fucking destroyed. But he's still a good cash grab, of course, so she'll shake his dead corpse in front of the fandom for money every time she wants something from it.

Also! Another reason I think her plotlines feel disconnected (I'm sorry Bardugo I respect you as a person, but shit-) is because the writing in SaB is just bad. I mean, nevermind the absolutely nauseating implications of the way she portrays the Grisha as a persecuted group who's situation is never actually fully addressed as it should be, considering Grisha rights is what her main villain is fighting for (imo for a series called the Grishaverse, LB seems to be pretty anti Grisha), but her characters and story alone are just wrong for each other. They don't fit together.

And the ending is one of the main pieces of evidence in that regard! You can’t say the ending where Alina isn’t Grisha anymore is her “going back to where she started” when she’s always been Grisha. She just didn’t know she was Grisha because she denied that part of herself that she was born with.

Alina is reluctant to move forward or change, she struggles with adapting, and she’s very set on the things she’s grown attached to throughout her life. She also has some latent prejudices against the Grisha, and so denies the possibility of being Grisha for those reasons as well.

Alina’s lack of powers in the beginning of her life because she willfully doesn’t learn about them to avoid change versus her lack of powers at the end of the book when she’s accepted them and then they’re stripped away from her by outer forces are two entirely separate circumstances. You can’t make a parallel about lost powers and lack of Grisha status bringing her back to the start when she was always Grisha and she always had powers and she simply refused to come to terms with it because of personal reasons.

The first situation is an internal conflict that indicates a story about growth and a journey of self acceptance. Denying herself the opportunity to learn about her heritage and to find acceptance with a group of people like her because she’s tied to the past and because of the way she was raised is the setup for a narrative that tackles unlearning prejudice and learning how to connect with a part of her identity that was denied her and learning how to grow independent and self assured. It’s the setup for a different story entirely. The second situation is an external conflict that centers around the ‘corrupting influence of power’... for some reason.

In a world where Grisha do not have social, political, or economic power and they are hunted, centering your heroine’s journey of self acceptance and growth around an external conflict about... the corrupting influence of power (in a group of people that don’t actually have any power?!) just doesn’t work. It is literally impossible to connect the two stories Bardugo is trying to push in Shadow and Bone without seriously damaging the main character’s developmental arc.

The only way a narrative like this would work, claiming that she has gone back to where she started, is either a) if the Grisha weren’t actually a persecuted group and instead were apart of the upper class, or b) if the one bad connection between the two instances is acknowledged - that Alina denied a part of herself crucial to self acceptance and growing up, and that losing her powers at the end has also denied her. It is a tragedy, not a happy ending.

Alina suffered because she didn’t use her powers. She grew sick. It was bad for her. This was not a resistance to 'the corruption of power and the burden of greed', it was her suffering because she couldn’t fully accept herself.

Framing the ending as a return to the beginning can’t be done if you don’t address how bad the beginning was for your main character. You brought her back to a bad point in her life. You regressed her. This should be a low point in her arc. It should be a problem that’s solved so she can finish developing organically or it should be something that is acknowledged as a tragedy in it’s own right, for the future the world (the writing) denied her.

This is a ramble and it makes no sense and I’m really sorry, but my point is that Bardugo put the wrong characters in the wrong story. The character arc required for organic development doesn’t match the story and intended message at all. The narrative doesn’t fit the cast. She's got two clashing stories attempting to work in tandem and she ends up with both conflicting messages that fans still can’t comprehend in her writing and an ending that doesn’t suit her main character to such an impossible degree that it’s almost laughable.

So yeah, there's a few reasons why I think the story and the plot feels so bad and disconnected. I hope you don't mind me making this answer so long! 😅 I was not expecting to write this much.

[sitp-recs]

Random ask:

Hi Liv! What really draws you to Drarry as a pairing and Harry and Draco as individual characters?

Personally I was always a fan of Draco (because of the whole bad boy rebel thing- I didn’t realise there was so, so much more to him than until I started getting obsessed with Drarry) but I actually never really liked Harry (except I always supported his decisions and loved his sass) all that much in the beginning until I joined the Drarry fandom and realised that in retrospect, he’s an incredible character and wasn’t done any justice at all in the series. I mean the turning point for me was revisiting the part where he tricked Ron into performing well by pretending to give him the Felix Felicis. Like this boy-

But what made me fall for Harry was The Ordeal of Being Known by @lou-isfake . That fic. Oh. My. Gosh. The amount they delved into Harry psyche and the extensive knowledge they had of that character, what he went through and how all of these experiences shaped his life later on; I’m a little suspicious of them actually being Harry’s actual creator and not the terfling (I personally think all rights of Harry Potter should go to them).

And Draco. What the fuck. He’s the most underrated character in the entire series because unlike how he was portrayed as a villain who ended up receiving no redemption arc, he was a victim of his own circumstance just like (his lover) Harry, and they were both very gay grey characters.

And the more fanfics I read, the more and more I fall in love with the millions of slightly altered versions of them both and honestly it’s criminal how little we really know about them. And well, Drarry. My obsession with these reading about these two idiots falling in love (which is canon in my mind) grows enormously every single day and I just pray for more opportunities to get involved within the fandom because I’d quite literally have lost my mind if it weren’t for Drarry.

But my thesis aside I really want to know what you feel about it as well (and your lovely followers too!).

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk x

Well this was one hell of a Ted Talk, I love it! It was really interesting to read your thoughts and insights about this. And TOOBK is an absolute masterpiece, @lou-isfake deserves all the love and praise for coming up with such a moving, thoughtful and emotionally complex story, honestly their mind!!!

As for me… I will admit that I haven’t revisited the books in ages, probably even before Cursed Child came out *hides* I found the increasing plot holes, lack of character depth and diversity issues very disappointing and since fic gave me everything I needed in terms of expanding the universe, I kinda let go of the books pretty early on. I moved abroad 4 years ago and didn’t even think of taking them with me lol for shame 💀

Which brings me to my second point: I’ve never felt particularly drawn to either Harry or Draco in the books. Great levels of sass aside, I found Harry boring, whiny and indolent, while Draco was confined to that one-dimensional bully arc that wasn’t really done in a clever or satisfying way, and didn’t deliver redemption or closure. I’ve never found them compelling as main character/antagonist, I didn’t even care enough to ship them. Now I understand my perception was shaped by young Liv’s limited mind and bad writing, I’d probably read Harry differently and be more compassionate towards him. Isn’t it great that good fic and growing up give us some perspective!

So to answer your main question, what drives me to them is a good “enemies to lovers” story because I freaking love these dynamics. I love the fire, the intensity, the inner conflict, the vulnerability, give me all the implications and complications. Fic makes it possible because it gives them emotional depth while exploring multiple post-war possibilities. There are so many ways to bring them together and pull them apart, and so many interesting ways to expand the universe and the magic lore while doing that. Like you said, it’s refreshing to see those slightly different versions of them finding each other and falling in love! At this point I feel like I’m more knowledgeable about fanon as the canon characterization becomes a distant memory in the depths of my mind. I love it that fics take time to properly explore their trauma and give them the room to process it and to do some self-discovery, whether it’s professional, sexual/romantic, in a found family scenario, etc. One fic that transformed the way I see Harry is Away Childish Things by lettered, it felt like a punch in the stomach but oh, it hurt so good!

I took many breaks from Drarry over the years but I keep coming back because we’re lucky to have SO MUCH top notch content. It blows my mind the amount of talented creators that keep joining the fandom, the superior quality of their works, the sense of community we all share. I haven’t found this anywhere else and it fuels my love for the ship which, let’s face it, might not have survived under other circumstances. I wondered if creating a blog would be a good idea because I didn’t plan on staying around for very long, yet here I am two years later nowhere close to leaving 😂

Wow this got really long and somehow I feel like this was an extremely vague and unsatisfactory answer, sorry anon. Thanks for the ask, I’d love to see other people’s thoughts on this too!

[yoontaethings]

normal kind of love — jjk (1)

pairing: jungkook x reader 

rating: explicit

word count: 2.5k

warnings: a lot of cussing and some teasing if you squint, but other than that none really (the warnings will come next chapter lmao)

you’re one half of hollywood’s on-screen it couple. the greatest chemistry known on-screen with the one and only, jeon jungkook, the bane of your existence.

a/n: this was supposed to be a longer chapter but i decided to split it in half to tease potential readers mwahaha btw this chapter is very very unedited, though i did postpone the upload because i had to remove some parts because i just thought the story didn’t need those bits anymore lol but the rest of this story i haven’t even read through yet, i just wrote and wrote and wrote so please excuse any errors (my tenses might also not be consistent but i’ll edit this soon)

taglist: @min-nicoleee @thisartemisnevermisses @ggukkieland @kokoandkookie @somelazysundays

There was no way.

There was no way in hell they were pairing you up with him. Again.

You were confirmed to be cast as the female lead in the movie before any other characters were casted. They should have chosen a different male lead for this romance film. Heck, even Kim Taehyung, a friend of yours, received an offer for the role and you were certain he planned to take it. Unfortunately for you, even if Taehyung wanted the role, he couldn’t accept it because of scheduling conflict with another film he’s already working on.

Jeon Jungkook, an actor you starred alongside in “Dangerous Illusion”, was just confirmed as the male lead of your upcoming movie “Chosen for Pleasure”. The same man who seemed to make it his life goal to ruin you. After Jungkook was confirmed to play the male lead in your upcoming movie, fans on Twitter have been blowing up about it and made you two a trending topic worldwide. Elated fans mentioned you in their tweets expressing how happy they were to see you two again together. You wish you could say you felt the same.

The previous movie you worked on was a thriller/mystery. You played the part of Jungkook's wife in the film. The film was a blockbuster hit, as a result of the well-thought storyline, yet additionally because of its leads. Fans adored the chemistry between you and Jungkook, regardless of not having a lot of romantic scenes in the film. There were a lot of fans who wanted to see you two on-screen once more, this time, in a romance focused film. Looks like their wishes were coming true.

To add insult to injury, your impending film was going to be an adult romance. It required some steamy scenes that normally didn't trouble you because you were a true professional, yet absolutely irritates you now since you need to do them with Jeon Jungkook.

The script reading was to be done today and your eyes opened an hour later than the time you set for your alarm because of the fucking snooze button. Seriously, why were snooze buttons even invented? They just allowed people to sleep through their alarms continuously.

Hand reaching for the phone on your nightstand, you knocked over a booklet that was over it. It was the script you spent hours reading to grab a sense of the character you were going to portray. Obviously, you already knew the basics about the part you were going to play, but knowing the entire story helped in portraying your character.

Your eyes squinted at the bright light of your phone that had the numbers 8:33 glaring at you, unlocking it to see a couple of texts and missed calls from your manager.

‘Are you awake yet?’

‘Please don’t tell me you forgot about the script reading today’

‘Ok I know you’re still asleep but just make sure you get ready on time, being late won’t do you and your image any favors’

‘I’ll pick you up at 9’

You rolled your eyes at his messages. You loved Hoseok and he was the best manager you could have been given from your agency, but he nagged too much. He was also your friend and his endless nags made you want to rip your eyeballs out sometimes because even when you’re supposed to unwind with him, he never forgets to remind you of your job.

‘I’m the fucking lead, Hobi, they’ll wait for me’

You slapped your phone back onto the nightstand and started going about with your morning routine. You didn’t have a lot of time, and even though you knew they would definitely wait for you, you hated being that bitch who made people wait so you took a quick shower and slapped on some sunscreen, powder, and finishing off with your go-to lipstick. You didn’t bother with makeup and dressing up. This was just going to be a script reading and sure, there were going to be photos taken but the thousands of dollars you’ve spent on facials and treatments already made sure your face was at least flawless despite the lack of effort.

Bringing only your phone, wallet and script, you exited your building and as usual, a shiny black van already awaited outside. Hoseok was leaning on it, scrolling through his phone when he sensed your presence and looked up.

“Oh, thank god you’re on time.” He exhaled in relief, pocketing his phone.

“I value sleep but you’re well aware I also value my career.”

Hoseok grinned. “Now there’s the y/n I know.” He then slid the van door open and you entered without another word.

The drive was pretty much uneventful, with you scrolling through your social media, seeing what fans have been tweeting about recently and with Hoseok humming along to the random pop music playing.

You longed for a distraction, something much more interesting than working your thumb throughout the drive because of the chasm that you were about to jump into when you arrived on set. You weren’t stupid enough to forget about the man who got the role of your romantic interest in the film. But you were wise enough to not let it haunt you for the past weeks. Now though, you can’t really avoid it anymore since you were supposed to be seeing him in person again after almost 2 years. You didn’t exactly leave on the best terms with Jungkook but who knows, maybe you’ll be able to act civil around each other.

At least you were sure you were going to act civil around him, already decided on taking the higher path. You’re not so sure about him, but fingers crossed he’ll at least be an adult about the situation and pretend he can stand being in the same room as you.

Soon enough, you were entering the room the script reading was to be held in. Bowing and greeting the actors and staff seated around the table as you passed by to get to the last vacant seat. You caught Jungkook’s eyes following your movements as you sat down. Luckily, he was seated across from you and it was easier to ignore his presence with the staff members greeting and coddling you.

As always, script reading began with actors introducing themselves and the role they’re going to play. As the female lead, you started off.

“Hello everyone. I’m y/n y/l/n and I’m going to take on the role of Yuri.” Hands clapped around you as you sat back down.

“Hello, I’m Jeon Jungkook and I’ll be playing Ryan.”

You didn’t bother clapping unlike the rest and avoided the eyes of the voice’s origin.

The script reading continued without a hitch– for the most part. The other cast members were very friendly, and laughter was exchanged during the read. The same couldn’t be said for you and Jungkook though.

When lines between your characters were exchanged, there was a weird tension in the room. It felt like everyone else were holding their breaths and waiting for either of you two explode and announce that you can’t do this film anymore. As dramatic as that would be, none of that happened. Instead, cheesy romantic lines sounded flat and bored from both you and Jungkook. The director made a tsk-ing sound whenever that happened.

“It’s always been you.” You read. The script said that Yuri and Ryan stared in adoration towards each other before Ryan uttered his next words.

“Marry me?” Jungkook asked.

You nodded your head as a wrap for the script reading. According to the script, there was supposed to be a kissing scene at the end, so you make ridiculous smooching noises. The cast burst into giggles before the director stood from his seat.

“…and that’s a wrap!” He clasped his hands together. “Hopefully when we start shooting things only look up from there.” He flitted his eyes between you and Jungkook.

Honestly, you wish that too but from yours and Jungkook’s history, you don’t really think that’s possible.

You were both professionals though and you’re sure you could at least count on him to make the on-screen romance feel real.

“I’m sorry.” Hoseok said with pity in his eyes.

“Wha- but… why?” You asked, confused with what was happening.

Your part in the new film ‘The Notebook: Remake’ has apparently been withdrawn. As one of the rising stars in Hollywood, this was a really great opportunity for you. It’s one of the most anticipated films and accepting the offer of being the female lead in the movie was a no-brainer. Anyone who refuses that role is just stupid.

But now they were apparently taking it back.

Hoseok sighed. “There were too many scandals surrounding you recently. It doesn’t matter if they’re true or not, but you’ve been seen in hotels that Jeon Jungkook has been in too, and in everyone’s eyes you’re now secretly seeing him.”

“But we’ve never even been seen together in any of those photos. Don’t people know the word fucking coincidence?” Your brows furrowed, fists clenching at your sides. “And what does this have to do with my role in the film?”

“It seems they wanted someone with a ‘cleaner image’ and someone who’ll get the film to be a hit. Apparently, the romance won't be convincing if the female lead is dating someone in real life.”

You stared at Hoseok. He stared back waiting for a lash out, an angry outburst, anything really, but you remained silent, eyes unmoving. Soon enough, the dam doors burst open and the tears suddenly came streaming down your face. Hoseok exhaled and wrapped his arms around you.

“Hobi what did I do so wrong to deserve this?” you sobbed into his chest.

“Shh, it’s not your fault they’re all dumbasses. But you know the industry, y/n. We’ll find better films for you, okay?”

“Why is Jeon Jungkook such a thorn on my side? Why is he always ruining everything for me?”

“We can’t blame him, honey. He’s probably a victim in this too because of those damn rumor outlets.” Hoseok rubbed his hands along your back.

“But I’m getting the short end of the stick! The rumor is probably just feeding his bad boy persona!”

“Life’s unfair, y/n. Surely by now you’re aware of that. Just remember, karma’s going to bite them in the ass someday, okay? For now, do you want to call it a day and go home? I’ll drive you back and I’ll just report to the agency that you’re not feeling well.”

You nod your head, too listless to bother answering with words because there was only one thing on your mind right now.

Fuck Jeon Jungkook and his good looks. He just ruined the best opportunity for you. You were going to get him back for this. Like Hoseok said, karma’s going to bite him in the ass someday. And that karma was going to be you.

You were supposed to be looking forward to filming one of your dream movies with your dream director. But all you felt was dread when you arrived on set. You promised yourself that you’d stay unaffected to Jeon Jungkook, but you couldn’t help the distaste for him to be left on your face while filming.

The scene you were shooting was when your characters first met and the first takes were a total disaster. You and Jungkook barely spared each other a glance, even when your character was supposed to be enticed by him, breaking down Yuri’s cold exterior. A break was called after the 6th take because the director was so frustrated that he looked like he was about to call the casting director and replace his two leads.

You sighed, not knowing what to do with yourself after the announcement of a break. Your feet led you to your dressing room, ready to pass out on the couch but before you could, someone barged in. Your head turned towards the door, expecting it to be your manager or the director or anyone really, just not the person who currently stood at the doorway.

“Can we talk?” Jungkook asked. Your eyes were suddenly drawn to his biceps which bulged from his shirt as he crossed his arms. The damn arms looked delicious. Too bad they belonged to someone you would never ever be attracted to.

“Sure.” You shrugged your shoulders. You were sure he came here to talk to you about filming and how to work out your indifferences and shit like that and honestly, you were so tired of hating him you’re ready to just go along with whatever. Hating someone actually takes a lot of effort, you realize.

Jungkook stepped towards you until he’s close enough that you had to tilt your head upwards to look at his eyes. His eyes locked on yours for a moment before his arms uncrossed and one of his hands landed on the wall behind you. He successfully caged you in with no way out. His lips part and your eyes are drawn to the movement, feeling his exhales on your nose. You swallowed nervously.

Good lord his breath smelled so good.

“Babe, I’m sure you’re just as thrilled as I am to be working with you again as you are with me, but let’s not mess this up okay? Let’s get this over with perfectly and quickly so we don’t have to deal with each other again after. Deal?” His eyebrows raised in question and you nodded dumbly, unable to form a coherent sentence with how close he was to you.

You felt a sudden rush of heat down there and was mentally cursing the man in front of you for how much he was affecting you. He tilted his head to the side and leaned in closer to your face as if he was about to kiss you then he suddenly stopped, his mouth forming a smirk, taunting you.

That smirk was all it took for you to snap back to reality. No, you were not going to let him take the upper hand here. A burst of confidence surged through you as you leaned closer to him too and allowed your lips to brush lightly against his cheek.

“Deal.”

You pulled away, satisfied with how his lips drooped apparently not expecting that. You looked down and there it was, the tenting of his pants that brought a coy smile to your lips. Ha, take that.

You glanced back up at him, your fingers trailing over his thighs. “Aw, didn’t realize you saw me that way Jeon.” You abruptly pulled away and walked out of the room without another word, leaving him hard and defeated.

This is the beginning of his karma, you thought as you grinned to yourself.

[starshipsofstarlord]

Hey if requests are open can I ask one?

Can you do a bucky or stephen strange x reader where the reader falls under the ace spectrum and they are terrified to tell him that they are ace.

I'm ace (on the spectrum) and I've been struggling with forming romantic attachments and not feeling like "complete" or "enough" so I just felt this would be nice💕

If its convenient for you then please do this request

Thank you!

On the spectrum

Pairing | Bucky Barnes x reader

Summary | based on the request. I kinda made a little twist to it, so I hope that you like it. I am in no way saying that asexual people can only be with asexual folk, but I thought this might be cute, so I wrote it like this xx

Warnings | erection, mentions of sex, ^^

Quick link to my masterlist, if you’re interested in reading more of my crap 😬

Jolting up from your rest, your eyes widened as you get your weight lounging upon Bucky, eyes wide as felt an appendage of his jolting stiffly upon your inner thigh. It was a surprise, the pair of you, through the expanse of your short term relationship, had never had the conversation of sex, and a part of you wanted to avoid it at all costs. There was something that you needed to inform Bucky about, but you were wary of what his reaction could be.

You weren’t sure that he would understand, after all, back in the 40s he was known for his womanising reputation, and whilst you knew that you weren’t another loose fling that had no attachments, it was still a big deal to share the truth with him. Not only would it impend and possibly affect his view of a future with you, but it would promote a new side to you, that you hadn’t told many people about.

Nat knew, but that was only because years back, you had confided in her, confused about your lack of sexual attraction to anyone. She had been supportive, and prompted you to research online, to see if you were as she suggested, asexual. There were many perceptions of the sexuality, some people would still do the deed to keep their partner happy, and others swore off the act altogether.

It wasn’t that the thought and idea of sex grossed you out, in fact, you could understand that people did it to feel amounts of pleasure that came from nothing else. But the rouse of body parts brushing against the other, and slipping inside was not something that ever appealed to yourself. And then you met Bucky, and your perception of the ordeal remained the same; you weren’t blind, you knew Bucky was extremely attractive, however, there still seemed to be no pulse in your veins that was prompting you to jump his bones.

It wasn’t him, it was you, and that was more okay. There was nothing wrong with not having a desire to perform erotic acts with any partner, and more so than his appearance, you had fallen for not only Bucky’s heavenly appearance, but his soul. He had an old soul, that was a given, with all things considered. And that was what had first made you step towards the man that liked to be alone, and change his perception of that fact.

He was new to the team, Tony enjoyed picking fun at the man, who as he liked to say ‘hadn’t got any in eighty years’. Bucky hardly responded to Iron Man’s nit picks, ignoring them instead to settle the conflict in his eyes. Berating with Tony was off the table, and so were snarky remarks, otherwise the billionaire would remind him of his sins against the Stark family, although in foresight, he had just been carrying out orders.

A groan relented from the man beneath you as you uncomfortably shuffled, his cock clearly rubbing against your thigh. His sleep dazed eyes slowly peeled open, revealing the blue globes beneath that stared up at you. A furrow endorsed his features, as he came to realisation of what had you so frozen; he was hard, nothing in particular had turned him on, it was just his body’s way of rousing him from slumber, and apparently it had extracted you from your rest also.

He released his arms from around you, watching as you shyly rolled to the side, and glanced at him from out of the corner of your eye. He released a small and sorrowful smile as he glanced down to where the covers had lightly raised from his manhood, feeling guilty for how his body had reacted by itself. “Doll face I’m sorry, I didn’t- it just- ugh.” The man groaned, rubbing his face with his prosthetic hand as he tried to rid the dust from out from the corner of his eyes.

“It’s okay.” Your voice came across as meek, small to the elephant in the room. “Just I- there is something I should tell you.” You twiddled with your fingers, picking nervously at the hanging skin that had chipped its way partially off on your latest mission, that had required you to furiously try and peel a jammed car door open to get the family out. Bucky now focused all his attention on you rather than the uninvited presence of his little friend in the bedroom, his pupils sending you signals of warmth as if to tell you that whatever you were going to tell him next, he would remain here for you.

“I’m asexual, and I get that you aren’t and you probably want all of nothing in this relationship but-” You spoke, but quickly paused when you saw Bucky tilted his head, a clear frown creating a thin line through the middle of his forehead. “What is it, do you not want me or-“ he stopped you from speaking, reaching out to hold your hands, giving them a light comforting squeeze, before he happened to open his mouth to speak.

“Doll face.” That name made you gulp, afraid that it would be the last time that he addressed you in such a way. And if it were, then that emotional connection that you felt to him would be unwound, and set out to sea to float and turn under the waves. “Asexual.” He tested the word on his tongue, as he lightly nodded, for some reason the phrase feeling right upon his tongue. “Can you explain it to me, I don’t know what it is?”

Of course, he wouldn’t know what it is! It made sense, he was from the forties, where various sexualities were not explored, all because straight white men thought their opinions were inferior. Well now, everyone had the freedom to be who they wanted to, and could be attracted to whomever they pleased, as things should have always been. Brushing your hand through your hair, thinking of holding onto the locks for dear life as you felt your nerves persevere, and spur in your membrane.

“It’s where someone does not experience sexual thoughts or feelings, towards anyone. Their thoughts are primarily romantic, and that’s how I feel. I do love you Buck, but I’m not sexually attracted to you, and I understand if that is a deal breaker for you. Not everyone wants to be put on a sex ban for the entirety of their relationship, but for me, it’s not like that at all, instead it’s more so I find the little moments to be more intimate than intercourse.”

“Y/n... I, not to jump the gun, but I’ve been feeling the same way.” Bucky slowly spoke, making your eyes dart up to his guilty expression. “I guess eighty years on ice will make you think about the things that are more important, and you are the most important person to me, and I guess if we neither of us have any desire to have sex, then me and you are supposed to work.”

It was surely a surprise, but he had contained his emotions, thinking that even when Tony pried at him for his lack of involved affections, he felt ashamed, as though there was something wrong with him. But it appeared as this day and age was far more fitting for this version of him, the one that had endured the battles against aliens and his own friends.

“I’m sure we’d have found a way to sort your needs out even if you weren’t asexual.” It felt strange for him to hear himself described with that word, but it felt right. “And look, it’s gone down.” You laughed lightly, resting against his chest once more as he let out a breathy laugh, and cuddled you to his chest. “I’m with you for you Buck, I love every part of you. And I think, maybe we should move out of the compound and get a place together, maybe downtown?”

“Really?” His eyes lit up like a Christmas tree, shining with festive luminescence. “You want that, with me?” You humbly nodded, pressing a kiss upon his cheek as you inhaled his scent. His hands dipped to your waist, holding you that bit tighter. He was never going to let you go, no matter who was what, or what was who. The two of you were y/n and Bucky, and you got through anything.

That way, leaving these Stark white four walls behind, Stark himself could not pry at the soldier, nor make jokes about his lack of sexual affection. The two of you were complete with the truth wading between you, there was to be no dwelling or worrying about the other thought, because you both understood.

[animeyanderelover]

Could I have headcanons for Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke sharing a darling?

This was actually part of a post I made a while ago. It was about sharing a darling pairs in which I was personally interested. Also, since I did already a Sakura and Naruto post and a modern reader post, I tried to summon the backstory shorter up and layed my focus on the dynamic of the relationship.

Tw: Yandere themes, possessiveness, obsessiveness, delusions, unhealthy relationship, unhealthy mindset, vicious behavior, harsh behavior, killing, manipulating, kidnapping

Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura sharing a darling

🍜💙🌸I can see you as a fellow classmate back in the academy days with Naruto having already a huge crush on you back then and going on small little dates with you. When the teams were made, he was definitely upset that he wasn’t part of your team, jealous of the classmates who were. With Sakura you developed a good friendship during these days since Naruto brought you over as often as possible since he wanted to introduce you to his new friends. She was just thankful that Naruto had someone, he could always count on. Sasuke was most likely annoyed by you at first because that blonde over there never stopped talking about you. I feel like that if you would excel in a special area, ninjutsu for example or would be a good strategist, he might be impressed. But he would definitely need to spend a lot of time with you. You might have helped him with new techniques for which he acknowledged you.

🍜💙🌸You could say that this was somewhat the start of it all, Naruto and Sasuke both being in love with you. It made the relationship a bit more complicated to say the least, both often arguing when it came to you. A lot of snarky and mean comments from Sasuke, poking fun at Naruto and saying he wouldn’t be strong enough and Naruto throwing childish tantrums. Sakura, knowing that both of them liked you, was of course saddened due to her crush on Sasuke back then. But she also knew that you couldn’t do anything about it and felt almost sorry for you, these two were much to take after all.

🍜💙🌸It came to the final showdown between Sasuke and Naruto after he had decided to leave the village, wanting to get stronger and feeling hatred for Naruto because that guy had gotten so strong and monopolized your time. It led to a much more intense fight between those two, Sasuke more aggressive because of all the anger inside of him which led him to yelling at Naruto that one day he would get you and then you would be his. Naruto on the other hand got terrified when hearing this, not willing to let you anywhere near Orochimaru and Sasuke, who was clearly not thinking, which also led him to pushing harder.

🍜💙🌸He was scared when he had to leave you alone, but also knew that this was a necessary step to get stronger. He made Tsunade, Sakura, Kakashi and everyone of his friends promise that they would protect you. He knew Sasuke was lurking somewhere outside there, waiting for his chance.

🍜💙🌸It was during this time that Sakura fell for you, spending everyday with you that at one point Tsunade just decided to train both of you together since you were always there. She just realized that you had been there for her all the time, always supported her and acted as the shoulder to cry on when she had needed one. She felt conflicted about this, knowing that Naruto and you were an unofficial couple which led her to some mood swings. She was either on cloud nine or somewhere deep underground.

🍜💙🌸When Naruto came back, she informed him about what had happened. He was at first a bit more iffy about how to feel, but him and Sakura shared a great trust after all, leading to both of them agreeing to share whilst also wanting to safe their teammate. Sasuke on the other hand had spent years training with Orochimaru and that guy had somehow found out about his pupil’s little obsession with you, daring to sometimes ask him about you which led to Sasuke aggressively reacting. Even the thought of Orochimaru anywhere near you was disgusting.

🍜💙🌸After he went rogue, he had originally planned to take you after defeating Itachi. You could have been in the search troupe together with Naruto, Sakura and all the others. Tsunade and Kakashi were aware that Sasuke was after you, so they most likely either made you pair up with Naruto or Sakura at that time. If Sasuke found out or not depends on whether he sensed you or not. If he did, there’s a chance he really went after you, only to be interrupted by all the other people searching for him which was quite frustrating. You were so close and he still couldn’t grab you.

🍜💙🌸He didn’t know about Sakura yet, Tobi probably told him about it, using it as a manipulation to make him distrust the village even more and bring him to joining the Akatsuki. And that made Sasuke snap. As if it wouldn’t have been enough that this blonde moron had fallen for you, Sakura too?! Was that guy kidding him! And when he found out that those two were even sharing, he honestly was irritated. The concept of sharing the person you love wasn’t exactly well known to him.

🍜💙🌸It was most likely after the war that those three finally came to the terms of sharing with each other. Of course Sasuke needed a lot of time to get convinced. It was most likely Sakura and maybe even the darling who suggested it. Naruto wasn’t exactly all that happy with it. He was a jealous boy after all and he knew that Sasuke wasn’t exactly...the nicest person. He was dubious about this whole thing and the only reason why he was willing to give it a shot in the first place was because Sasuke was his friend. And as a worshipper he refused to let you get yelled at. And Sasuke was conflicted about this. Sharing really isn’t his strength and whilst he did saw them as his teammates again, he was still pretty selfish about you. He shouldn’t have to share you with someone else. But he knew too well that Sakura and Naruto wouldn’t let you go. Neither would he. He needed most likely help and comfort from the darling during this time so he would come to the terms of sharing.

🍜💙🌸It is truly a thing to witness in here. Because whilst Sakura and Naruto worked together so well because they share a lot of Yandere types and has the same point of view about how to treat and share you, not to mention the same trust, Sasuke isn’t like those two. He’s more of a bastard who can lash out easily when the wrong buttons are pushed and also yell at his darling for it.

🍜💙🌸It’s also worth mentioning that whilst Naruto and Sakura do see Sasuke as their friend and teammate and trust him, they always hoped for him to come back, when it comes to their darling, both of them are a bit more distrusting and more on edge. They know Sasuke’s mood swings and whilst he definitely is a bit more nicer to you, he can just as well spit out some hurtful words. And that’s definitely anything, but fine with Naruto and Sakura.

🍜💙🌸The dynamic between Naruto and Sasuke could be described as shaky. They are literally back to how they used to act to each other when they were younger. That means Sasuke mocking his friend whilst Naruto throws childish tantrums. But both of them changed after all so it can go from just acting like children and teasing and yelling at each other quickly to actually throwing hands over you. And in this case Sakura and the s/o will have to step in so they don’t try to kill each other again. And whilst Sakura definitely always tries to solve this peacefully, the moment she loses her temper too or notices that both of them scare you with their behavior, she definitely isn’t above punching them and yelling at them to stop their stupid behavior since they scare you with it.

🍜💙🌸The dynamic between Sakura and Sasuke might be a bit more awkward given the fact that Sakura used to have a crush on Sasuke and he knows that too. But at least those two are a bit more polite with each other, most likely because most of the times she knows not to push his buttons and tries in general to always talk with them if they have a problem with each other. If we go from cannon logic and assume that both of them should still develop romantic feelings for each other later on, this would of course change a few things. Sasuke would just have an easier time sharing with someone if he loved that person as well. It would still be pretty turbulent though.

🍜💙🌸Time has to be developed carefully because once again, the dynamic with Sakura and Naruto might be great, but Sasuke doesn’t add up to it. Sakura and Naruto are used to sharing their darling and definitely spend a lot of time with them together. Whilst Naruto does need a bit more time alone with their darling than Sakura does, they managed to schedule the time. But with Sasuke in the picture things changed quite a bit. Sasuke is more of a loner and since he’s possessive, he needs a lot more time with his darling in comparison to many others. Another thing is that he needs the calmness and Naruto and Sakura tend to be a bit too loud for his taste. Not only that, but all three of them together with their darling can lead to a quick argument between Naruto and Sasuke and that’s when it really gets noisy.

🍜Naruto would grow most likely more clingy due to constantly being teased and poked fun at by Sasuke. From the three he is definitely the one who would smother you more than Sasuke. He isn’t exactly happy with having to share with the black-haired boy since Sasuke goes sometimes a bit too harsh on you. There is also this old competition from his younger days between him and Sasuke which still influences the way those two act with each other. He’s also a bit more protective over you than he usually would be, not wanting you to endure any of Sasuke’s mood swings alone. If he should find out that you always get scared when him and Sasuke are in another shouting session which is about to reach it’s climax, he would feel totally horrible afterwards, apologizing whilst suffocating you in even more affection. He would try afterwards to prevent himself from getting angered too much by Sasuke for your sake which isn’t very easy.

💙Sasuke is somewhat the more unpleasant counterpart of Sakura and Naruto. He isn’t the nicest person and he knows that too. He tends to often get all pent-up due to constantly throwing fits with Naruto. It makes him a bit more trigger-happy and so it definitely happens once in a while that he has to let his frustrations out, sometimes even on you. He does feel bad afterwards since he understands that this isn’t completely your fault. It’s just hard for him to endure Sakura and Naruto, who are very overbearing to say the least. He needs time alone with you to connect properly and that is hard with the other two constantly around. He isn’t exactly all that willing to make things up with Naruto since he possesses a huge amount of Uchiha pride. Sakura would honestly have to drag him by the collar to apologize to you and to make both of them apologize to each other.

🌸Sakura is the voice of reasoning between those two. She’s honestly the only reason they didn’t lose their other arm as well. She’s more reasonable with everything and acts somewhat as a messenger between those two since their pride often keeps them from talking to each other like a grownup does. She often talks with both of them as polite as she can, figures out the problems and talks to the other one, listening to his problems and trying to make him help to understand the point of view from the other guy a bit better. She’ll also there to comfort you when you had to witness yet another fight between those two. Whilst she is someone who tries to solve things in a non-violent way, she tends to lose her temper too, grabbing both of them by their collars and shaking them whilst shouting at them to stop acting like complete idiots. Does anyone of those want to make you feel scared of them? Good grief.

🍜💙🌸This will never be a picture-perfect relationship, not with Sasuke in here. It will get overtime better though since Naruto and Sasuke will somewhat learn to co-exist next to each other and share with each other which will have you and Sakura let a sigh of relief out. The only thing they have to work on now is somehow helping Naruto and Sasuke to not get a bit too messy. Sakura is due to being a medic not that willing to kill unless something serious happened. Naruto possesses a few boundaries, but it is still too easy to set him off. And Sasuke definitely earns the first place. He’s paranoid, even more since he has to share his darling already and doesn’t want any other trailing after them.

🍜💙🌸It also makes him want to isolate his darling a bit more which is not okay with the other two. Sasuke isn’t really comfortable with with going outside with his darling, he is more on edge, especially when in public. He doesn’t have anything against a short walk outside in nature, but when he has to go under humans he tends to keep his darling closer to him. This isn’t that terrible of a case with Naruto and Sakura. They are just on the jealous side, but not that paranoid like Sasuke is. In short, there will always be things that will require long discussions and fights until for the time being a solution is found.

[amuelia]

How do you think Roose will meet his demise? Or will he survive? What's your best Roose end game predictions?

Thank you for the question! This will be a long post under the readmore, going into my thoughts on the show ending and exploring what the books may have set up in regards to themes and characterization, as well as a bit of general analysis of Roose' story arc in a Dance with Dragons (and some speculation about Ramsay as well).

If you click on the readmore i will have divided the post into sections with bolded Headers, if you want to only read my specific endgame ideas you can skip ahead to the "His Endgame?" section.

In The Show

The show had him get killed by Ramsay in s6, which informs a lot of the fandom speculation about this storyline.

I am not a fan of the show's scenario as it was both similar to tywin and tyrion as well as a mirror of robb's death; it would also be offscreen in the books since neither of the characters are PoVs and Ramsay would need to do the act in secret. This would ultimately undercut Roose' role and impact, being a death scene that is not very unique and also isn't shown to the reader directly. Since no PoV is even in Winterfell currently, we would just hear of it from afar and not witness the consequences.

The show also has a different dynamic in the Bolton storyline, emphasizing Ramsay as the "main character" of this arc, and elevating him to the main villain for s5-6 to fill Joffrey's shoes as an evil character played by a very charismatic actor. Ramsay's show writing is informed by the needs of a TV setting that wants shocking moments and capitalizes on "fan favourite" actors; his rising importance in the show thus is not necessarily an indicator of his book importance. The show was also missing many central characters like the northern lords and the Frey men in Winterfell.

The show had a tendency to kill off characters early when they wanted to cull storylines or had no plans to adapt more of the character's story (like Stannis, Barristan, possibly the Tyrells...); In Mance Rayder we have the most obvious example, where they killed him off for real in a scene that in the book was a misdirection. We also have characters like Jorah where it appears the showrunners had their own choice of how they want his storyline to end, even if Grrm has his own ending in mind.

"For a long time we wanted Ser Jorah to be there at The Wall in the end," writer Dave Hill says. "The three coming out of the tunnel would be Jon and Jorah and Tormund. But [...] Jorah should have the noble death he craves defending the woman he loves." - Dave Hill for Entertainment Weekly

So a death in the show does not need to be an indicator that the books will feature an equivalent scene, even if it gives a hint as to what may happen. By s5 the show has become its own beast, and the butterfly effects from radical changes they made as well as the different characterizations results in the show having to cater to its own needs in many cases when it gets to resolving a plotline.

"We reconceived the role to make it worthy of the actor's talents." - Benioff and Weiss for the s5 DVD commentary, on Indira Varma's casting as Ellaria

In The Books

(Since this post was getting out of hand in length a lot of these arguments are a little shortened/not as in-depth as i'd like! Feel free to inquire more via ask if something is unclear or you disagree)

In the books i find it hard to make a concrete guess as to how it will end. Occam's razor would be to assume the show sort of got it right and that it will vaguely end the same, which could very well happen and i will not discount the possibility; Ramsay is cruel, desires the Dreadfort rule, and is a suspected kinslayer and has no qualms to commit immoral violence.

"Ramsay killed [his brother]. A sickness of the bowels, Maester Uthor says, but I say poison." - Reek III, aDwD

Reek saw the way Ramsay's mouth twisted, the spittle glistening between his lips. He feared he might leap the table with his dagger in his hand [to attack his father]. - Reek III, aDwD

Arguments against this or for a different endgame come down to interpretations of the themes in the story arc and opinions on dramatic structure/grrm's writing, and are thus very subjective.

The way the story currently is going, Ramsay killing Roose treats Roose almost as a plot device; his death brings no change or development to Ramsay's character as we already know his motivations and cruelty align with such an act, and we can assume that he would feel no remorse about it either. The results of such a scene would be firmly on a story level, as it brings political changes and moves the plot along into a specific direction. Roose himself cannot have any relevant character development about it as he does not have a PoV and we would not be able to witness his reaction from the outside.

“The only thing worth writing about is the human heart in conflict with itself.” - William Faulkner, often quoted by Grrm

Further, killing his father is very difficult to pull off in secret (Roose is frequently described as very cautious, and employs many guardsmen). And even if Ramsay pulls it off (people often interpret Ramsay as Roose' blind spot, assuming he might be caught by surprise, not expecting Ramsay would bite the hand that feeds him), Roose is the one that holds his entire alliance together; The Freys would be alienated by Ramsay who would antagonize Walda and her son as his rivals, The Ryswell bloc appears to dislike Ramsay (especially Barbrey), and the other northmen are implied to not even like Roose himself. Killing Roose would quickly combust the entire northern faction, and hinder Ramsay's further plans (another reason why I am not convinced of a book version of the "Battle of Bastards"). Though this might of course, if we look at it from the other side, be grrm's plan to quickly dissolve this plot and move the northern story forwards.

"Ramsay will kill [Walda's children], of course. [...] [She] will grieve to see them die, though." - Reek III, aDwD

"How many of our grudging friends do you imagine we'd retain if the truth were known? Only Lady Barbrey, whom you would turn into a pair of boots … inferior boots." - Reek III, aDwD

"Fear is what keeps a man alive in this world of treachery and deceit. Even here in Barrowton the crows are circling, waiting to feast upon our flesh. The Cerwyns and the Tallharts are not to be relied on, my fat friend Lord Wyman plots betrayal, and Whoresbane … the Umbers may seem simple, but they are not without a certain low cunning. Ramsay should fear them all, as I do." - Reek III, aDwD

Roose' death at Ramsay's hand also removes him thematically from the Red Wedding, as we can assume such a death might have happened regardless of his participation in the event (seeing as Ramsay is getting provoked by Roose constantly in normal dialogue, and has a general violent disposition). Roose already took Ramsay in before aGoT started, and married Walda very early in the war, which is already most of the buildup that the show's scenario had. It also has little to do with the The North Remembers plot except set dressing, since the northmen are presumably neither collaborating with/egging on Ramsay nor would they appreciate the development.

Themes: Ned Stark and the rule over the North

Roose is treated as a foil to Eddard; They are often contrasted in morals and ruling styles, while also having many superficial similarities that further connect them (they are seen as cold by people, grey eyed, patriarchs of rivalling northern houses, etc...).

Pale as morning mist, his eyes concealed more than they told. Jaime misliked those eyes. They reminded him of the day at King's Landing when Ned Stark had found him seated on the Iron Throne. - Jaime IV, aSoS

They both have a "bastard son" that they handle very differently; Roose treating Ramsay in the way that is seen as common in their society. Ramsay and Jon as a comparison are meant to show that Catelyn had a reason to see a bastard as a threat (since Domeric was antagonized by his bastard brother), but also shows that her suggested plan for Jon would not have stopped any danger either (as Ramsay being raised away from the castle didn't help).

And if his seed quickened, she expected he would see to the child's needs. He did more than that. The Starks were not like other men. Ned brought his bastard home with him, and called him "son" for all the north to see. - Catelyn II, aGoT

"Each year I sent the woman some piglets and chickens and a bag of stars, on the understanding that she was never to tell the boy who had fathered him. A peaceful land, a quiet people, that has always been my rule." - Reek III, aDwD

It appears to me that Roose' story functions in some ways as an inversion to Ned. He makes an attempt to grab a power he was not destined to (becoming warden of the north), where Ned did not want the responsiblity thrust upon him ("It was all meant for Brandon. [...] I never asked for this cup to pass to me." - Cat II, aGoT). Where Ned rules successfully and his northmen honor his legacy ("What do you think passes through their heads when they hear the new bride weeping? Valiant Ned's precious little girl." - The Turncloak, aDwD), the Boltons are largely hated and there are several plots conspiring against them ("Let me bathe in Bolton blood before I die." - The King's Prize, aDwD).

It seems possible to me that in terms of their family and legacy, Roose might also live through an inverted version of Ned's story; where Ned died first, leaving his family behind, Roose already lived to see the death of his wives and trueborn heir, and might thus also live to see Ramsay's death. Ned leaves behind well raised children and a North who still respects his name, and even though he dies it will presumably all be "in good hands" in the end (in broad strokes, obviously this is all much more morally complex). Roose however built up a bad and toxic legacy, and also built his way of life around evading consequences; it makes sense to me that he would be forced by the story to finally endure all the consequences of his actions and witness the fall of his house firsthand. After all we already have Tywin who fulfils the purpose of dying before his children while his legacy falls to ruins, and a Feast for Crows explores this aspect thoroughly.

Roose' arc in A Dance With Dragons

The story repeatedly builds up the situation unravelling around Roose, and him slowly losing a grip on it and becoming more stressed and anxious.

Reek wondered if Roose Bolton ever cried. If so, do the tears feel cold upon his cheeks? - Reek II, aDwD

Roose Bolton said nothing at all. But Theon Greyjoy saw a look in his pale eyes that he had never seen before—an uneasiness, even a hint of fear. [...] That night the new stable collapsed beneath the weight of the snow that had buried it. - a Ghost in Winterfell, aDwD

Lady Walda gave a shriek and clutched at her lord husband's arm. "Stop," Roose Bolton shouted. "Stop this madness." His own men rushed forward as the Manderlys vaulted over the benches to get at the Freys. - Theon I, aDwD

It also directly presents him as a parallel to Theon's rule in aCoK, who similarly experienced a very unpopular rule and his subjects slowly turning against him. Presumably, the point of this comparison will not just be "Ramsay comes in at the end and unexpectedly whacks them on the head". Both Theon and Roose invited Ramsay into their lives, giving him more power than he deserves, and causing Ramsay to make choices that increasingly alienate others from them (the death of the miller's boys for example has repercussions for both Theon and Roose). Grrm is likely steering this towards a difference in how they will deal with this situation.

It all seemed so familiar, like a mummer show that he had seen before. Only the mummers had changed. Roose Bolton was playing the part that Theon had played the last time round, and the dead men were playing the parts of Aggar, Gynir Rednose, and Gelmarr the Grim. Reek was there too, he remembered, but he was a different Reek, a Reek with bloody hands and lies dripping from his lips, sweet as honey. - a Ghost in Winterfell, aDwD

"Stark's little wolflings are dead," said Ramsay, sloshing some more ale into his cup, "and they'll stay dead. Let them show their ugly faces, and my girls will rip those wolves of theirs to pieces. The sooner they turn up, the sooner I kill them again." - The elder Bolton sighed. "Again? Surely you misspeak. You never slew Lord Eddard's sons, those two sweet boys we loved so well. That was Theon Turncloak's work, remember? How many of our grudging friends do you imagine we'd retain if the truth were known?" - Reek III, aDwD

Roose' arc is deeply connected to the relations he shares to the other northern lords, which has been heavily impacted by the Red Wedding. It stands to reason that they are going to be an important part of his downfall, and we see many hints of them plotting to betray him.

The north remembers, Lord Davos. The north remembers, and the mummer's farce is almost done. My son is home." - Davos IV, aDwD

Themes: Stannis and kinslaying

The books set up Roose and Stannis as foils as well; Both lack charisma and have trouble winnning the people's support, Stannis and Roose both parallel and contrast Ned, Stannis appears as a "lesser Robert" where Roose is a "lesser Ned", Stannis represents the fire where Roose represents the ice, both struggle over dominion in a land that doesnt particularly want either of them, etc... What i find interesting is how they are contrasted over kinslaying:

"Only Renly could vex me so with a piece of fruit. He brought his doom on himself with his treason, but I did love him, Davos. I know that now. I swear, I will go to my grave thinking of my brother's peach." - Davos II, aCoK

"I should've had the mother whipped and thrown her child down a well … but the babe did have my eyes." [...] "Now [Domeric's] bones lie beneath the Dreadfort with the bones of his brothers, who died still in the cradle, and I am left with Ramsay. Tell me, my lord … if the kinslayer is accursed, what is a father to do when one son slays another?" - Reek III, aCoK

Stannis is set up as someone who is very thorough and strict in following his own code and his "duty", even if he does not like what it forces him to do.

Stannis ground his teeth again. "I never asked for this crown. Gold is cold and heavy on the head, but so long as I am the king, I have a duty . . . If I must sacrifice one child to the flames to save a million from the dark . . . Sacrifice . . . is never easy, Davos. Or it is no true sacrifice. Tell him, my lady." - Davos IV, aSoS

The armorer considered that a moment. "Robert was the true steel. Stannis is pure iron, black and hard and strong, yes, but brittle, the way iron gets. He'll break before he bends." - Jon I, aCoK

Roose however is frequently characterized as someone who tries to get as much as he can while avoiding negative consequences, and who does not have a consistent moral code and instead bends rules to his benefit to be the most comfortable to him.

It is often theorized that Stannis will end up burning his daughter Shireen; the Ramsay issue might then serve to contrast the two men. If Grrm intends it to be compared by the reader, I can see it going two ways: Either Roose will be forced to finally act in a drastic way after avoiding his responsibility in regards to Ramsay and he will be forced to get rid of his son, making him break the only moral hurdle he has presented adhering to during the story (though analyzing his character, the kinslaying taboo is probably less a sign of moral fortitude and more him using the guise of morals to explain a selfish motivation). Or he might not act against Ramsay and suffer the consequences, presenting an interesting moral situation where some readers might consider his action "better" or more relatable than Stannis', breaking up the otherwise very black and white moral comparison between the two men. It serves as an interesting conflict of the morality of kinslaying compared to what readers might see as a moral obligation of getting rid of a monster such as Ramsay; contrasting Shireen whose death would not be seen as worth it by most. Ramsay as a bastard (who was almost killed at birth if he hadnt been able to prove his paternity) also makes for an interesting verbal parallel with the bastard Edric Storm, and might be used for a look at the utilitarian principle of killing a child (baby ramsay/edric) to save countless people from suffering that underpinned Edric's story.

"As Faulkner says, all of us have the capacity in us for great good and for great evil, for love but also for hate. I wanted to write those kinds of complex character in a fantasy, and not just have all the good people get together to fight the bad guy." - Grrm

"Robert, I ask you, what did we rise against Aerys Targaryen for, if not to put an end to the murder of children?" - Eddard VIII, aGoT

"If Joffrey should die . . . what is the life of one bastard boy against a kingdom?" - "Everything," said Davos, softly. - Davos V, aSoS

However Grrm decides to present these conflicts or which actions the characters will take in the end, it will result in interesting discussion and analysis for the readers.

His Endgame?

Looking at the trends of the past books, it is probably going to be hard to predict any specific outcome; every book introduces new characters and plot elements that were impossible to predict from the last book even if their thematic importance or setup was aptly foreshadowed.

Roose has a lot of plot importance and characterization that has, in my opinion, not yet been properly resolved in a way that would be unique and poignant to the specific purpose his character appears to fulfil. However I also have a bias in that i did not like the show's writing of that scene which makes me averse to see a version of it in the books, and i really like Roose as a character and want to see him have more scenes in the next book(s). This leads me to discount plot speculation that cuts his character arc short offscreen early. Roose is only a side character; however, i have trust in grrm's writing abilities and that he would give him a proper sendoff that feels satisfying to a fan of the character.

"…even the [characters] who are complete bastards, nasty, twisted, deeply flawed human beings with serious psychological problems… When I get inside their skin and look out through their eyes, I have to feel a certain — if not sympathy, certainly empathy for them. I have to try to perceive the world as they do, and that creates a certain amount of affection." — George Martin

Considering my earlier analyis, there is a case to be made for Roose killing Ramsay; however it appears grrm might have a different endgame in mind for Ramsay, foreshadowed in Chett's prologue:

There'd be no lord's life for the leechman's son, no keep to call his own, no wives nor crowns. Only a wildling's sword in his belly, and then an unmarked grave. The snow's taken it all from me . . . the bloody snow . . . - Chett, aSoS

I tend to think something might happen to Roose/the Bolton bloc later in the book that would cause Ramsay to attempt to flee the scene again like he did back in aCoK fleeing Rodrik's justice; perhaps Ramsay is sent out to battle but then flees it like a coward, or he sees his cause as lost. This time, the fleeing and potentially disguised Ramsay would not make it out to safety though, and get killed without being recognized as Ramsay, dying forgotten. This would serve as dramatic irony since Ramsay so strongly desired to be recognized and respected as a Lord of Bolton, without being too on the nose.

As for Roose, i could see him getting captured and somehow brought to justice (either when someone takes Winterfell or in some sort of battle). I see it unlikely that he will be backstabbed like Robb was, because it seems very "eye for an eye" and ultimately doesn't teach much of a lesson except "he had it coming"; But the various people conspiring against him could lead to his capture by betraying him (giving a payoff to the northern conspiracies and the red wedding). I would find a scene of him standing trial interesting since i believe we didn't have one of these for a true non-pov villain yet, and it would be an interesting confrontation that he cannot escape from (he also loves to talk so it would be a good read to see him make a case for himself).

I assume Roose will be out of the picture when the Other plot finally properly kicks into gear (whether dead or "in prison"). With Stannis as a false Azor Ahai and Roose as a false Other (with his pale, cold features), their struggle in the north seems to be a representation of the false "Game of Thrones" that distracts people from the "real threat" of the Others.

As always this is just my opinion, and it could all go very differently in the books! There could always be something that completely uproots my analysis and goes into a direction i did not expect from the material we had; But i have fate that Grrm as a writer will deliver and give me something i can be satisfied with.

[drwcn]

maybe after today’s acls training i can finally write that chengqing ER oneshot. 

— “Patient male, mid-twenties, motor vehicle collision, eta 3 mins” 

— “What no vitals? No GCS? ETA 3 mins? Who’s on the paramedic team?!” 

— “No one….Dr. Lu hit someone with her car on her way out of the hospital.” 

【A Midnight Conversation in Your Local ER】- Complete

[1] 

The night hunt had gone to shits.

That much was undeniable.

Jiang Cheng heard the panicked shout of his disciples just as he saw the array that he had stepped on.

Fuck.

The ghost of an once mediocre demonic cultivator wanna-be was going to bring Jiang Cheng, Jiang Wanyin - the Sandu Shengshou - to meet his maker. The irony of the situation would be laughable, if he wasn’t so irrevocably screwed.

That was his last thought before his entire body was engulfed by a blinding light and the world he knew disappeared.

The ground beneath his feet gave away, weightlessness paralyzing his body though he did not fall. He felt…launched, his body warping and squeezing and stretching, the air sucked from his lungs into the endless black vacuum.

But just like that it was over. Jiang Cheng barely had time to make peace with his death before his feet touch solid earth again.

Or at least….he thought it was earth, this black, tarry hard thing striped with yellow and white. He stared at it dumbly, breathless and disoriented, barely able to react when a loud blare assaulted his senses and his world went blindly bright yet again.

This time there was pain.

Jiang Cheng clutched Sandu, ready to fight, but then his head hit the ground and everything went dark. When he woke up again, an indeterminate amount of time later, he was in a small tube and had a distinct feeling he was not wearing pants, socks or shoes.

How the fuck do you ‘scan’ a cat???  

[2]

Method actor. The nurse, from the other side of the curtain, mouthed silently.

“Sir, can you tell me your name.”

“Jiang Cheng, Jiang Wangyin.”

The resident paused, awkwardly contemplating how to continue. “Uh…..which is it? Jiang Cheng or Jiang Wanyin?”

“Jiang Cheng, zi Wanyin.”

“Traditional parents?” The resident tried to crack a joke, but it fell flat. The strange man stared up at him with a blank look in his eyes and a frown that was rapidly deteriorating into a scowl. The resident cleared his throat and cast his eyes back onto his clipboard. “Uh, ahem, just the name on your ID please.”

“My what?" 

"Your personal ID….like a driver’s license?”

“Cultivators of the gentry fly on swords or ride horses. We do not rely on carriage valets.”

“Eh… right. Uhm, can you tell me how old you are and what year it is.”

“I’m 39, and the year is jiachen.”

Lu Qi frowned from where she stood by the door, arms crossed, watching her resident and medical student work. 39? He looks like a college student. But he also thinks he can fly, so I guess age is the least of our worries. 

“Jiachen.…?”

The M3 fished his phone out from his scrub pocket pocket and typed it in. “Sounds like the ganji system, like an old timey way to record year used in the past.” He whispers clandestinely to the resident.

“….Right. And uh, do you where you are?”

The man scowled at him. “Am I supposed to?” 

The resident scribbled something on the chart, and then looked up with a plastered awkward smile. “Well, thank you Mr. Jiang for your patience. Wang Fei here is the medical student on our team. He’s going to stay and ask you a couple more questions if you don’t mind. Afterwards we’ll confer with our attending and the team will be back to see you shortly.”

As he turned away, the R3 grimaced and shared a look with Lu Qi, who was the youngest attending physician in their ER, but was not technically working at the moment and so was not on the case. And technically, as the perpetrator who hit Jiang Cheng with her car, she had a severe conflict of interest.

At least this Jiang Cheng dude didn’t seem keen on pressing personal charges against her for MVA or suing the hospital in general… but that being said…

Yeah, they’re going to need a psych consult. 

Unless he’s on acid. 

Well… okay, psych consult either way. 

[3]

"It’s okay, you can relax.” Jiang Cheng said, waving dismissively at the woman standing by his bedside. “I’m not going to take you to the magistrate for hitting me with your carriage - car. You didn’t mean to, and I just came out of nowhere.” 

“....Thank you.” 

“You’re not Wen Qing. I know that now. Your name is Lu Qi. You can call off those psychia - psych - psychics - head healers - or whatever, I’m not crazy. It’s not my fault, you just… look so much like someone I used to know."

"Wen Qing.” Lu Qi echoed. 

“Yeah. Wen Qing. She was a healer - a doctor - like you, but different.” 

“I see. What happened to her?"

"She died. Almost twenty years ago."

"I'm sorry... that's awful.” Lu Qi’s response rolled off her tongue so well, because she had said those word a thousand times during her residency. So much so that it no longer had much meaning to her. Tonight however, she meant what she said. “Were you two close?"

"No, well…yes, maybe. No we weren’t exactly friends if that’s what you’re asking. She...operated on me. Without my consent or knowledge. Took my brother’s golden core and put it in me and then lied with my brother to my face about it. So no we weren’t “close”, but Wen Qing saved my life - well the purpose of it anyway. Saved me from a life of ordinariness.” 

Lu Qi did allow herself to dwell too much on what the fuck a “golden core” was, because her gut response was almost instantaneous. “That’s shitty of her.”

She clamped down on her tongue. 

God, why did I have to say that? To his face?! He was obviously in love with this Wen Qing person and they were encroaching on some dangerous emotional territories, but Lu Qi swallowed down her caution and plowed on nevertheless. There were things she felt she had to say, and since she’d already hit him with her car, how much worse could this shit get? “What I mean is she shouldn’t have. Not without telling you. Besides...there’s nothing wrong with ordinary.” 

Jiang Cheng chuckled bitterly. “Maybe you’re right. Still...she didn’t deserve to die. What her clan did was not her fault.” 

Now that threw Lu Qi off. Did this guy...kill her? 

Lu Qi half wondered if she stumbled upon a Yakuza-esque member whose psyche finally snapped after years of murder and violence. And yet, he seemed perfectly coherent, no flight of ideas, no tangential thought, no hallucations. Even his delusions seemed...logical. 

I must be the one losing, damnit.  

Jiang Cheng scratched a little at his chest, as if palpating for the “golden core” that he spoke of. "She saved my life, but when she needed help, I couldn't save her. But, if I were to go back… I can't say I'll choose differently. My clan needed me, my clan who was almost cleansed by hers. No, no I wouldn’t choose differently. I don’t regret my choices, but I am sorry. Sorry to her, sorry to my brother. I'll always be sorry that she died, and that I failed her when she needed me." 

Jiang Cheng had no idea why he was telling this stranger any of this, but maybe after twenty years, he was finally ready to address this guilt that he lived with. I mean who else was he supposed to tell? Jin Ling? It was nice, to have that face as an audience, receiving his words of confession. 

"She would forgive you." 

Lu Qi had no idea why she was offering absolution as if she had authority in this matter, but when she said it, the conviction she felt was so real, it was almost as though some external force was acting through her.

Which was ridiculous of course, but... 

"How do you know? You're not her." Jiang Cheng shook his head. “I wouldn’t forgive me.” 

"No, but you said she was a physician. So she should know, more than most, that sometimes there is no choosing who gets to live or die."

Jiang Cheng fell quiet at that, and his gaze grew distant. Lu Qi thought perhaps he was no longer seeing her as she was in front of him - white coat, scrubs, stethoscope -  but someone entirely different. The tension he held in his shoulders slowly eased, and he sighed. In the silence that stretched between them, Lu Qi hoped that this strange man with his strange past could find a sliver of peace. 

[4]

— Did you love her? 

— I thought so, foolishly, but maybe I didn’t. Even if I did, it was not well enough. 

— Do you love her still? 

— No... I don’t know. It’s been too long...but sometimes, late at night when Lotus Pier is quiet, I think I do. 

...

— Are you ashamed of it? 

...

— No. No I’m not. 

[5]

The patient known as Jiang Cheng left AMA, that is, against medical advice. It was the term they used sometimes for people who just up and leave without informing the team. 

Lu Qi had gone out to check on his labs, which came back with bonker numbers (I mean really, a hemoglobin of 455, sodium of 200, and a HCO3 of like...3?), but Jiang Cheng was gone from Bay 6 when she returned. The nurse made the overhead page, a code yellow was called, but four hours later, Lu Qi was ready to admit that she was never going to see this Jiang Cheng ever again. 

Somehow, she was okay with that. She had said what needed to be said.  

Her chief had given her a call on her cell and told her to go home and sleep. The guy didn’t look like he was gonna press charges, let’s count our blessings and move on. But the night had just been too damn strange that Lu Qi was all wired up from it and couldn’t possibly fall asleep. She had handover at 10 anyway. There was a change of clothes and toiletries in her bag. She could always take a shower in the anesthesia staff’s on call room and sleep until then. 

Dr. Sun was the anesthesia staff on-call tonight and was currently stuck in trauma OR. They were buddies since medschool; she’d understand.

Sighing, Lu Qi took a seat on the bench across from the bougie cafe in the lobby of the hospital. At this hour, it was the only one still open in the entire facility. The drinks they sold cost an arm and a leg, but Lu Qi needed the pick-me-up after the night she had. 

As she nursed the last bit of her matcha latte, two bickering voices pulled her attention to the front entrance. 

“Aiyo, A-Liang I already said I’m fine! I don’t need to be here!” 

“Fuck out of here with that bullshit, Chen Zhaoxi. You fell off the fucking roof! If Wu Kun hadn’t called me, you’d have gone on -”

It was him! Lu Qi shot up. It was Jiang Cheng! 

But no...no it wasn’t him. The well-dressed man dragging the second man (dressed in red pajamas) into the hospital was not Jiang Cheng. He had the same face - chiselled, handsome, scowling - but it wasn’t him. For one, his hair was trimmed short and neat, unlike Jiang Cheng who looked like he walked straight out of a BL xianxia tv drama. Secondly, his face was softer, eyes younger, and he couldn’t have been older than Lu Qi herself in her early thirties. 

“I was just trying to get to the litter of kittens trapped -”

“Yes, yes, and it was very heroic and I’m sure it would’ve made Wu Kun very horny, and you morons probably would’ve fucked once he got home had you not made a valiant attempt at breaking your neck -” 

“Excuse me,” the security guard manning the information desk chastised sharply. “It’s 4am. This is a hospital! Lower your voices, sirs.” 

“Sorry.” The men apologized sheepishly. 

Then, A-Liang, Jiang Cheng’s doubleganger asked, “Could you please direct us to the ER? This is my brother, he fell off a roof.” 

Lu Bin had no idea what possessed her to interject. “I can take you there.” 

All eyes fell on her. She walked towards them, heart pounding. 

This can’t be happening, this kind of thing just can’t happen... 

A-Liang’s face broke into a grateful smile. “Thank you, Miss -” Then his gaze trailed to her badge, and he corrected himself, “Dr. Lu. I’m Shen Liang. This is my brother Chen Zhaoxi. I think he fractured...well multiple things, please help him.” 

“Of course, come with me. Let’s get him a wheelchair. If he fractured is leg, he probably shouldn’t be walking.” 

“I didn’t fracture -” 

“You, you shut up.” Shen Liang rolled his eyes. “Don’t listen to him. He can lose three out of four limbs and say ‘ t’s but a flesh wound’.” 

Lu Qi couldn’t help but chuckle as she put an arm under the complaining Chen Zhaoxi and helped him towards the wheelchair. 

Shen Liang’s smile widened. 

[Extra]

“Holy shit, took you long enough!” 

When Jin Ling and Lan Sizhui finally dragged Jiang Cheng to their portal site, Jiang Cheng realized that the transportation talisman had created a channel through realities between what looked like two metal garbage dumpsters in a back alley behind a food establishment marked by giant yellow bunny ears.

Standing guard there, Lan Jingyi and Ouyang Zizhen were each munching on a strange layered bread and holding tall drinks contained in...what was it called again? Right. Styrofoam. 

“What is that?” Jin Ling wrinkled is nose at it. Brat. 

“It’s a Big Mac.” Replied Lan Jingyi as if Jin Ling was stupid. “And this is a milk shake.” 

Jin Ling scowled. “I said the bag of gold I gave you was for emergencies.” 

“Yeah but we were hungry.” Ouyang Zizhen defended. He neglected to tell them that the cashier had refused to accept the gold and instead asked for “cash” or “card”, neither of which they had, so Zizhen used a liiiiil confounding talisman he learned from Wei Wuxian. They did leave more than enough gold though...and that ought to cover the restaurant’s cost for their “burger”lary . Reaching into the brown paper bag he held under one arm, Zizhen pulled out a little box that opened to show pieces of... something. “These are chicken nuggets. They’re delicious! Try one! They’re really good with this sauce....hold on...” 

Lan Sizhui sighed. “We don’t have time for this. The portal will close soon. Let’s get Jiang-zongzhu home and we can sample these exotic food later.” 

The boys agreed. 

Jiang Cheng shook his head and huffed. 

[saturnsstufff]

The Empress- Darker the Weather // Better the Man

Warnings: topics from the empress, Violence

Sarah laid on the makeshift cot. Lately with how everything had been pulled out, the war seemed like it had no end. Her eyes danced dully well her fingers fiddled with the locket from her lovers. Tears easily welled her eyes at the thought of them waiting for her.

Distant, everything is scattered

She missed them, she missed them more than she thought she truly would. The way their fingers danced warmly around her locks. Or how mornings were spent wrapped up tightly within her wives arms, the cold artic air contrasting to the warm blankets. She just missed the softness of the lingering moments.

When your mind is shattered and torn apart

She knew the war wouldn't last forever, yet with every passing day, it seemed the ending was fading. Sarah knew she shouldn't be mad at Technoblade or (y/n), but she couldn't help it.

Maybe it started with (y/n), the way she clinged and lulled the grand emperor into a false sense of pride. She easily Loathed that. Everyone within the empire assumed the Emperor was in control, but Sarah- being the general, knew exactly who had the power.

In an instant, I can be indifferent

But could she really bring herself to hate her? After all she was pregnant with the Emperor's baby as of currently.

She knew she shouldn't, yet it was so easy...

When she walked into the tent to see the Grand Emperor packing his things- it left her seething. He was going to leave them- leave his troops- his people- people who gave so much in hopes to end the conflict quickly. Technoblade should have known others were missing important family events, yet here they stood, proudly serving under his name.

The blame is always shifted from the start

And it was all because She, called- begged, him to come home.

She couldn't linger about any longer, she needed to distract herself. So grabbing a cloak she left the base camp, although some of the men asked about where she was leaving too. Sarah simply wiped her eyes with pride and assured them of her return.

Leafless treetops in the snow

Views of death and bitter cold

The walk towards the nearby village was a bore. Due to the cold, barely any animals found home within the snow, anymore Sarah was starting to see the appeal of moving somewhere warmer.

Instead of visiting a bakery or a warm café, Sarah found herself wondering into a bar. Perusal, only the odd were within the warm walls. Brute men and sly women hogging up around the bar.

Without a step of hesitance she took her seat at the bar, the two brooding men beside her looked as if they should have scared her off. Yet when they tried to comment on Sarah's seat she simply sent a cold glare. Towards them, a wordless death threat of silence.

When the men backed off, they ultimately decided to move seats completely. In turn a younger gentleman took their seats.

Sarah didn't acknowledge him, something seemed off about it, yet she couldn't place her finger quite on it. The man took a glance to her, his fluffier Blonde hair radiating a familiar tone.

"You seemed troubled..." the man purred, sending Sarah into a eyeroll. Typical men. She thought, knowing exactly where this was leading.

"Don't think like that." The man said, his green eyes flashing slightly as a warning. "I'm only here to hear out a strangers problem... I'm hear to help." He mused.

Although Sarah was offset and held the high urge to not tell a thing to this man. Something told her it was worth it. She needed to get it off her chest.

So she did.

And through that, she felt her nerves lessen. With layer, and layer dropped about Technoblade, his wife, his family, everything. She felt a silver lining.

Something that should have stuck out to her however, was when she went on about Technoblade, the Man seemed to just know everything about him. Even things she didn't know- things that seemed future related. It was odd.

Yet here she found herself, drink in hand, explaining her problems to a lost man at a bar. Through the end of her rant, the only thing he had to say was "Men are hard, but im sure you've herd it before..." at the line she shrugged and looked to her glass.

The swirling bourbon within held her reflection, but something eerier about it, was when she glanced to the man inside the glass. The reflection, although looking exactly like the man beside her, when looking closer she saw halo's crossing over his face, Golden beams of bended light.

When she looked back to the man, he was looking at her unamused. "You know, there is a saying out there, that you may find, useful..." the man said.

You can take all you want, but not who I am

"What is the saying..." Sarah asked cautiously, now alarmed from the mans reflection. She watched the man take a drink before smiling- almost sinisterly.

"The Darker the Weather, the Better the Man" he said. Sarah gave a odd look to him, not understanding, but it didn't take long for the man to elaborate. "Say something hardens the man your talking about. Something that will truly drive him cold. He may turn out better than you expected. After all, weaklings rarely survive war." The man said casually.

The line rang around inside Sarah's mind, what could make techno so cold, that he refused to go home. The man watched her, trying his best to hide the wicked smile he held.

But the darker the weather, the better the man

And then it hit her. Almost like sheer brilliance, it hit her dead on.

You can take all you want, but not who I am

The letters to you.

You can't have my-

When Wilbur was tasked with waking you up, it was easy to say he was always overjoyed. With techno being absent from your side, Wil always tried his best to make you smile. Sometimes even Tommy would tag along.

Of course, Tommy didn't understand the severity of the moment how heartbroken and lost you felt, but he could easily tell you were sad at the least. So he also tried to cheer you up.

Sun shines through an open window

So on days he woke you, he would often run into Technoblade room, your silhouette laying within the oversized bed. He often viewed it as misplaced for how lonely your body looked.

But that didn't ever stop him from pulling the curtains open, the light rarely shined brightly through the glass, but in the end it did allow more light within. Well Wilbur pulled the curtains, tommy would often bounce on your bed, doing his best to make you smile.

Close the curtains real slow to hide the light

Although you would hide your face and try to hide, tommy wouldn't stop his smiling and joyful laugh. Yet Wilbur would always watch how your eyes would linger to techno's side of the bed. Wilbur hadn't seen the letters between you and techno, but he always saw how they tore you up. Whatever he was saying was hurting you, and Wilbur despised it.

But in time, maybe I can change it

At the least Wilbur was thankful you had Orion beside you, he was able to calm most of your haywire nerves. Of course, Wilbur never liked how close he was to you. But, he understood it was a time where you just needed someone.

We'll find someone who feels the same as me

Wilbur saw how you tried to hide your pain, your long nights spent crying, the days you refused to eat, the way you refused to acknowledge techno's lost presence. It was obvious who you were not on good terms.

Wilbur couldn't help his curiosity, he knew it was wrong, yet he did it anyway. When you had left your office for bed Wilbur snuck in, it was the first time he was in Technoblade office alone. The sword you made held high on the wall, truthfully it was poetic.

On a plaque underneath it, was lettering inscribed "the Empress" like the embodied empress, the sword similarly hung alone. With care he slid into your chair, slowly pulling the letters out to read.

You broke me down and stole my soul

And oh was his pissed. For good reason, he saw why everyone was so upset with him.

Left me vacant and all alone

Out of everyone, Orion was the one to see you at your worst. Never had he assumed he would have been so close to someone that he would have gave everything to take your pain away. It left his blood boiling to see you hurt the way you were.

Months of being alone, feeling lost, unloved, unwelcomed. It truly left him with a burning hate. Orion knew he could treat you so much better, that he could take care and provide for you and your infant child.

Over the time techno was gone, he felt he was the only commander to truly hate his leader. Hate what he puts others through, he hated the sorrow he brought along.

But the darker the weather, the better the man

But nothing compared to the pure rage Orion felt when he herd what techno did to you. When you all rested at Foolish's summer home, you didn't lay with techno right off the bat, instead you explained what happened between techno and you.

And Orion was livid.

Techno had put his hands on you- had put his hands on your throat. Orion felt every bone in his body scream to get even. No one raises a hand to those they love, it was just a unspoken law. Orion would have taken to Technoblade as well, only thing holding him back was your tender soft words.

"Please don't- please Orion... let it stay between us..." you begged to him. Soft doe eyes pleading to the Enderian.

You can take all you want, but not who I am

Although it gnawed at Orion’s heart, he respected your call and left it lie. But that didn't stop what fallowed.

With the Enderian's blood flowing strong with rage, emotion, and the urge to defend, he couldn't help the way his eyes slit with the dragons hue, the blood curdling purple that drove fear into those around him.

You were far down the hall, everyone was asleep, it was a perfect time to let everything go.

You can't have my

And go he did..

He had never felt it, even though his blood ran with the Enderian's, he had never felt his anger hit the point of breaking.

The point that others forewarned him about. The point where his jaw would dislocate and his skin would tear open to allow the canines of a monster to show.

It wasn't a side he thought he had.

You can't have my

Yet when the thought laced through his mind again. The thought of techno putting his hands on you, he felt the pop, and the blinding rage that fallowed. Throwing the nearest object as he let the curdling scream out.

You can't have my soul

When techno undressed for the night, he couldn't explain the shame and hurt that he felt. He couldn't meet his own gaze within the mirror. He knew you were willing to bathe with him again. Lay for the night and try and wish it to be what it once was.

But he knew he Hurt you. He knew it wasn't his direct doing, but he was involved- he took it too far.

He could still see the nail marks from where you grabbed his face, he hoped it wasn't the same for your neck.

He didn't deserve you.

He knew it. The way he lashed and you too willing asked him to bathe with you like it was over. You taking his hands, his face his body into your hands, you were truly too wonderful. To amazing for him.

But the darker the weather, the better the man

When you stepped into the bathroom he saw your tired eyes, your arms firmly around Thena. He saw how attached you were to her. She was your world, she was the world techno wanted to live with.

Techno knew he had no right to ask to hold her, not after what he had done to his tiny family. Yet he couldn't help but want to feel you and her in his arms. He wanted to redeem himself and show you he was worthy enough to protect you both.

You can take all you want, but not who I am

After all he was still your husband and her father in the end, it was his job, his one thing he cannot mess up. He knew others were on the line. Others more important than a endless battalion, you were his wife, his life, the mother of his daughter.

You were his world.

But the darker the weather, the better the man

So from that day, he swore. Dare anyone lay a hand on his wife, and daughter. He would raise hell upon them.

He would never loose you too like he almost did.

You can take all you want, but not who I am

[cienie-isengardu]

The Lin Kuei? As far as social dynamics and structure. You probably have a lot of these questions answered already, so you might just have to consolidate them... but what do think the Lin Kuei social structure is like?

I know there's the Grandmaster whose above everyone, and the Master Assassins (game characters we know about) and Sifu above everyone else, and rank is probably determined by skill less than birth. Sektor doesn't seem to get any special protection or treatment despite his family tree.

But what exactly is the hierarchy among the members? Who out ranks who? Both in teams, and as a group? What are the inter Lin Kuei relationships like, who feels what about who? What exactly is the qualifications? (Cyrax who I admittedly don't pay much attention to, for example confuses me, since he doesn't seem very impressive as a fighter?) How is rank maintained? I know they probably fight for it, but fighting constantly or to the point of death / serious injury seems counterproductive, even in mk? How is peace maintained? How is punishment dolled out, what constitutes punishment in a aggressively combative society like that, and in such a brutal environment, what is punishment?

If there's other things you think of to answer that I didn't ask, answer those too please. I love how much thought you put into these. Your the best. 🥰

"RELEASE THE RAMBLES!!!"

First off, sorry it took me so long to answer. Secondly, thank you very much for such a wonderful ask! Hope you will not regret once the rambles are set free, because there is a lot to talk about :D

The safest way to analyze Lin Kuei social structures would be to start with some basic question: what is a Lin Kuei? And the answer will be of course a clan, more precisely, a clan using assassins and thieves as its main source of income. But there is also another thing about Lin Kuei that will play an important role in creating and sustaining social structures - the strong independence streak and the pragmatism born from it.

Because the vital part of Lin Kuei is their loyalty to themselves. They work for those who can afford their service, but they aren’t bound to any earthrealm government or outworld ruler. I mean, Shang Tsung/Shao Kahn probably had a long-lived deal with Lin Kuei that benefited clan and in MK9 Lin Kuei offered the emperor their loyalty and service, but we also known that cyber Sektor refused to serve Quan Chi/Shinnok [MKX] once he decided the sorcerer had failed to fulfill his part of contract. Which means at the end of the day, the Lin Kuei benefit was the major goal to achieve. Even Kuai Liang’s reformed Lin Kuei shows this tendency - Sub-Zero will work with other Earthrealm Defenders but he isn’t blindly following anyone and is willing to go against fellow combatants (seen especially in banters with Raiden [MK11] where Sub-Zero questions god’s competence to protect the realm).

Interestingly, Shirai Ryu in the past did offer their service to various Japanese leaders / shoguns and who knows, even in modern days the clan still could have served the government as some special forces in time of need (and in return, have some protection and/or supplies from government?). In contrast, there is little to none information of Lin Kuei being loyal to one country - I mean, the sources usually call Lin Kuei warriors the “chinese ninjas” but we have never seen them showing any sign of national pride, haven’t we? Their only pride comes from belonging to Lin Kuei and their own skills. Another point against connection to any government is the fact that Lin Kuei are operating world-wide and collect people with special powers from over all world (Cyrax comes from Botswana [Southern Africa], Smoke/Tomas Vrbada from Prague [Czech Republic] and even Ice Bros were born in USA in old timeline). So, the fact that Lin Kuei warriors are diverse in terms of their powers and appearance/ethnicity will also affect the social structures.

So, the social structures on one hand must create a society that blindly follows Grandmaster’s will, on another be enough A) elastic to adapt a vast number of different people and B) solid to maintain the clan independence from others, Earthrealm and Outworld alike.

The problem with independence is that Lin Kuei works for the best price which also means constant danger. For warriors sent on missions to the safety of the whole clan. Without a clearly defined loyalty to anyone but themselves, Lin Kuei would be left on its own in case of enemy attack or any other potentially dangerous crisis. So the members of the clan must stick to each other because no one else would do that.

Regardless of type or date of source, the clan headquarters - one or many existing at the same time? - is usually presented as located in a naturally hard-to-reach, isolated place and with a clear defensive character, as can be seen below :

Lin Kuei for ages used naturally hard to invade / attack places like mountain peaks separated from the rest of the world by abyss with a bridge that can be easily destroyed and solid, thick walls to protect the clan. But here is a thing to think about - as much as there were a lot of strong, cunning and skilled warriors, Lin Kuei operated world-wide, taking jobs in various parts of Earthrealm and Outworld and some missions could take months if not years to finish and there was no guarantee that everyone would return. Which means the warriors couldn’t always be available in case of an enemy's attack or other serious crisis.

So, to maintain the defensive advantages, especially in a naturally harsh environment, there should be someone to control and if necessary take care of the state of walls, the bridge(s), residential buildings and so on. Which means Lin Kuei would need access to natural resources (wood, stone, metal) for expansion or repair but also for experienced craftsmen. There is also a matter of access to drinkable water and food supply, the most basic requirement for a clan to survive and thrive.

On one hand, warriors could fulfill such roles too, especially if we take into account a paragraph from Mortal Kombat novel by Jeff Rovin (1995):

They [Lin Kuei] would kidnap children when they were five or six and raise them in secret caves or woods to become superb athletes, great scholars, and unparalleled fighters, able to use all weapons and to improvise arms from common objects such as paper rolled to a knife-point or sand packed into a sock. They would train the children, boys and girls both, to be masters of many trades: carpenters, fishermen, priests, and even beggars, so they could blend in and make themselves useful in different towns as they traveled on missions for their lords.

Many young people died during training: some could not hold their breath for five minutes and drowned, others weren’t fast enough to avoid the weapons of the masters, some starved or froze or dehydrated when they were stranded, naked, in deserts or on mountaintops and told to make their way home. But those who survived were the Lin Kuei.

On the other hand, to become masters of the traders mentioned above, those children needed proper teachers. And yes, the already trained warriors could pass the knowledge to the younger generation but warriors first and foremost were responsible for earning money for the clan which is why personally teaching kids anything other than martial arts seems like wasting a time they could utilize in a better (more profitable) way.

This is why I suspect the social structures of Lin Kuei included various groups responsible for different needs of the clan.

The leader

So, we have a Grandmaster, the ruler. In modern times, pretenders for this title needed only to defeat and kill the current leader to take over the clan. Like Cyber Sektor and Kuai Liang did. But such practice may be just an exception to the long tradition, because Cyber Initiative was an extreme project that divided and ultimately destroyed the old version of clan. Killing the previous owner of the title may have some value (as in, eliminating any potential conflict of interest) but at the same time choosing and teaching a successor sounds much more practical. Because leading such a big clan is no easy feat thus any preparation would be useful and beneficial for the clan’s future. Not to mention the possibility of some secret knowledge that should be passed alongside.

Sadly, we don’t have much information about the inner politics of Lin Kuei. From the crumbs here and there, we know about Sub-Zero and past-Grandmasters that:

→ they could have offspring (example: Sektor).

However the sources don’t define if that was required from them in the form of a marriage or just as a way to secure the continuing inheritance of power (a tradition that Kuai Liang could simply ignore) or from their own choice or if the procreation of a child was unplanned and just happened. Whatever the truth was, in the case of Sektor, “it was never in question that he would join the Lin Kuei.”

The line from MK9 Sektor bio suggests that being a child of a warrior does not give immediate status as a member of the Lin Kuei. This in turn could suggest that not every child begotten by Lin Kuei warriors would be forced to join the clan. Sektor, as the son of the Grandmaster simply didn’t have a choice in the matter and who knows, maybe there is some premature qualification should the child be taken or not.

Another interesting part of Sektor’s BIO is this line: “Though this mission will put his clan in good standing with Shao Kahn, Sektor's ultimate goal is to supplant his father as Grand Master of the Lin Kuei." which may suggests that Sektor wasn’t the designated heir after all so plotted to overthrow his father?. I mean, he was sent to the Mortal Kombat Tournament as a participant and then cyborgized while the Grandmaster himself stayed human with a handful of other members of the clan. Then again, Sektor’s ending suggests that Grandmaster wasn’t surprised much by Sektor’s attempt to take over Lin Kuei, so maybe the killing of the previous leader was in fact a necessary part of rite of passage between old and new ruler?

→ it was against tradition for them to personally train new recruits

Stated in Deadly Alliance, in Frost’s Bio:

The winner was a mysterious female named Frost who seemed to have freezing abilities similar to those of Sub-Zero. Breaking with Lin Kuei tradition, the new Grand Master, Sub-Zero, took it upon himself to train this new recruit.

Interestingly, the Grandmaster was supposed to be the absolute ruler yet there were some traditions that actually regulated his or her participation in daily life of the clan. Kuai Liang simply ignored those and chose Frost as his apprentice, who at least in theory, became his appointed heir. By that logic, Sektor shouldn’t be trained by father, at least not before he gained the official status of Lin Kuei and proved himself worthy of Grandfather’s attention.

→ but it was their duty (choice?) to teach advanced arts to a few selected warriors.

This is mainly seen in Mortal Kombat Conquest TV series. The third episode (“Cold Reality”) gave us Shang Tsung’s explanation about clan and its warriors:

“The Lin Kuei, an ancient sect. Their training is the deepest secret as is their code. They are silent, swift and always lethal [...]. For some, a select few… the Lin Kuei Grand Masters will continue their education into darker areas. Then death comes in more interesting ways.”

Then, through this and another episode, the TV series shows that Grandmaster in fact personally oversees the training of Sub-Zero. So, the training of the new recruits may be against the tradition, but passing the advanced knowledge and the final trials seem to be not. Or at least the trials of the warrior with special (ancient) abilities.

This suggests the social status of a warrior - or any clan member - is affected by Grandmaster’s favor or lack thereof. Those chosen will advance, become more powerful and thus sent on more dangerous yet profitable missions. With a successful streak of missions, their notoriety will grow between prestige clients and the Lin Kuei community for good strengthening their social position. And who knows, one day they could take the place of (grand)masters in the inner circle serving closely the leader? On the other hand, those whose loyalty or skills get doubted by the Grandmaster are punished in several ways.

Inner Circle / Ancient (?) Masters

The same as with Grandmasters, there is little confirmed information about Lin Kuei masters. Bi-Han/elder Sub-Zero seemed to be favored by Grandmaster who called him the “our most cunning assassin and thief” (Mythologies: Sub-Zero) but it doesn’t sound like he was one of the inner circle.

In Mortal Kombat: Defenders of the Realm (episode 5, “Old Friends Never Die”), Kuai Liang mentioned “Ancient Masters” who decided to change warriors into cyborgs, while in the Mortal Kombat Conquest TV show we could see that Grandmaster keeps talking to some men about Sub-Zero’s training and powers. Interestingly, those men had uniforms looking more like his own than of any warrior.

(If Lin Kuei co-operated with Shang Tsung for ages, their life-span could be extended by sorcerer’s magic. Or, their own special abilities allow for such a long life. Thus the name of ancient masters?)

I think it is right to assume those masters formed an inner circle that advised the leader and helped in training the chosen warriors and most likely oversaw specific operations / aspects of the clan's life. Most likely with Grandmaster, they made the higher command and were the law.

Warriors

In the simplest way, this is the working class that earns money and builds the reputation of the clan. The warriors were the main source of incoming profit for the clan, but it wasn’t just material goods from assassinations and stealing but most likely also important intelligence data that Lin Kuei could use for its benefit or sell on. Thanks to them, Lin Kuei was also feared and respected in Earthrealm and Outworld alike.

So, on one hand, being a warrior in itself was a prestige rank that gave a chance to gain fame. The skilled and smart could advance into higher positions (the master assassins and thieves) and maybe even get Grandmaster’s attention. On another the life of a warrior was the most dangerous and hazardous occupation in the clan with little prospects for a long life. The victory was paid in warrior’s blood and pain while punishment for failure was severe and harsh.

The easiest way to classified them would be those two categories:

→ the common ones,

in games and comics looking alike, without distinctive features. It is hard to tell, if they possess any special abilities, if they were blood related to each other, what kind of missions they took.

→ the master assassins and thieves,

whose uniforms and weapons are modified to their personal taste and style of fighting and who have greater independence than warriors from the first category. I think it is right to assume that named warriors should be classified as such. So we have Sub-Zero/Bi-Han, Tundra/Kuai Liang, Smoke, Cyrax, Sektor, Frost, comics!Hydro.

Yet, this division may be in fact disastrous due to lack of enough sources. I mean, the lack of individuality does not necessarily imply a lack of appropriate abilities and for all we know, the “nameless” members just wear proper uniforms for their duties. Something that maybe even the named characters would wear if any source actually showed their downtime between missions. Frankly, the classic “ninja look” also makes everyone look alike, with only proper colors to distinguish between characters. Like the old comics version of Sub-Zero and Hydro - the main detail to tell them apart was the color of their eyes because both wore the typical Lin Kuei blue and dark uniform.

There is a lot to say about Lin Kuei warriors, so I will focus only on the aspects most vital to the subject and the role and effect it has on the Lin Kuei social structures.

→ armors, uniforms and their colors

Lin Kuei seems to have various uniforms, from those with plain (“classic”) look to very ornamented ones. Like I mentioned earlier, there may be an established type of clothes the warrior should wear on duty between missions while during the job the uniform was personalized due to the owner's skills and preferences. Some more advanced designs could be also a sign of personal achievements and were given / passed down (as family heirloom?) to said warriors.

The most noticeable thing however is the color. Since most clan members shared some kind of blood-ties (thus specific set of genes), the color may represent their connections to a specific branch of the clan. For example, blue was used by cryomancers and those warriors who had water-related powers. At the same time, blue seems like the most common color used by Lin Kuei. It makes sense for Kuai Liang’s warriors to use such tone, as to honor their leader and maybe even cut off from the dark past of the clan but frankly, Sub-Zero’s freezing power was called “ancient one” in Mortal Kombat Conquest TV series that alone was set ages before the last tenth Tournament happened, so maybe the ice/water always played a big role through the history and Lin Kuei simply adapted it for its common use? As to combine the reputation of the clan with the terrifying powers of cryomancers?

There is also grey color used by Smoke that fit well to his special power and yellow worn by Cyrax. Albeit if that has any connection to his unique genes or is just a color for a specific branch of clan or just esthetic, hard to tell.

Then we have a red color that most commonly is related to fire, something that Sektor frequently used at least in the new timeline. At the same time, various Grandmasters used red / reddish or burgundy colors (examples: [1] Mortal Kombat Conquest TV series, [2] Mythologies: Sub-Zero, [3] Sektor’s Ending in Mortal Kombat 9). So the red accents on Sektor’s uniform may in fact be a sign of his blood-ties to the leader (or leading family?).

Whatever true reasons lie behind the meaning of colors, Lin Kuei warriors seem to be segregated in certain smaller groups. Interestingly, even if Sektor’s red color in fact symbolised his connection to Grandmaster, this played little to none role in the MK9 game. Of course, the source did not show much inner dynamic between Bi-Han, Sektor and Cyrax but even with so limited space, Sub-Zero was the central figure in the group screen time which makes an impression he was in fact the leader. Then, the argument about the Cyber Initiative project happened only between Sektor and Cyrax, which could also imply Sub-Zero outranked them so they did not want to bring attention of their superior to their personal conflict. Especially since disobedience to Grandmaster was a serious crime.

→ codenames

Mortal Kombat X and 11 provided information that Shirai-Ruy does have some system of official ranks including the term Chujin that in general was a middle rank between ninjas (Takeda Takahashi is a known example). Lin Kuei has complex social structures but as far as we know, they do not use analogous to Japanese ninja system of ranks and yes, I know I categorized the named characters as the master assassins and thieves but frankly, I don’t remember other warriors to refer to them as such. The warriors just called each other by codename and various sources say the codename wasn’t something that permanently belonged to one individual. The name of “Sub-Zero” is the best example since it was used by many warriors through the course of a long period of time.

In both timelines, Bi-Han and Kuai Liang come from lineage of cryomancers serving Lin Kuei

and currently have ongoing conflict to whom the codename truly belongs. Because apparently, the name is passed to new generations once the younger cryomancer will prove their worth, most likely, by defeating the present champion. This does not mean that one must die because frankly, “retired” cryomancer still could teach adepts or serve the clan in a meaningful way. Also, which is very prominent with cryomancers, their mastery over ice grew stronger with passing years, so Bi-Han and Kuai Liang’s Grandfather in fact could be a pretty powerful warrior even as an old man.

The important thing however is that, the codenames may determine the position in clan hierarchy. We don’t have a way to analyze the subjection between codenames and social status of Sektor, Cyrax or Smoke but names used by cryomancers may define their level of mastery over ice. The title of Sub-Zero has existed for ages and I think it is right to assume this is a codename intended only for the best of the best. Sadly, we don’t know how high in the hierarchy was “Tundra” but we can’t cross the possibility that Bi-Han at some point in his career used that name too, before he managed to earn the mantle of Grandfather’s name.

So, Lin Kuei may not use typical ranks and instead stick to codenames passed from one generation to another. Thus no one is addressing Bi-Han as the master assassin and thief but everyone knows that the person using the codename “Sub-Zero” is one of top warriors in the service of the clan.

→ combat experiences, teachers and retirement

Combat experience is something that affects a warrior’s position in a clan because no amount of training (even as hellish as training of Lin Kuei adepts) will be the same as real life and death struggle. The more experienced a warrior is, the more valuable become to the clan. At the same time, old age will slow down even the best of the best fighters at some point. Surprisingly, the first game mentioned (hinted) the idea of retirement in Lin Kuei in Sub-Zero’s (Non-Canonical) Ending:

"After receiving the title of Grand Champion, Sub-Zero disappears back into the shadows from which he came. His only goal in the tournament was...the assassination of Shang Tsung. He was paid a large sum of money by one of Tsung's wealthy enemies. With his mission accomplished, Sub-Zero will collect his fortune and retire from his dangerous profession."

The original Sub-Zero was usually described as 32 years old. Which doesn’t sound old, but if we take into account the previously mentioned passage from the book, the teachings started at the age of 5 or 6 which could mean Bi-Han already survived two decades of harsh servitude to the clan (that abducted him and his younger brother). No one leaves Lin Kuei but there is a possibility that at some age the warrior may step down from the dangerous profession. Then, such a “retired” fighter could train adepts and young, less experienced members of the clan and maybe even start a family that will produce offspring - preferable with special powers - to supply the clan with new recruiters.

Because of that I assume that warriors in their prime were used mainly to do the dirty job and get as much money and valuable items as possible. Once they survived to a certain age, they shared the gained wisdom with less experienced fighters. We don’t know how students and teachers (“sifu”?) were assigned to each other; it may be related to their family ties or similars powers (cryomancers teaching cryomancers, like Kuai Liang and Frost) or the veterans picked youngsters for certain skills or traits that made them worth the time and effort. Anyway, veterans, as those who survived years of service, should be placed high in the hierarchy. Because their experiences and wisdom help to shape a new generation of warriors earning money and fame for the clan.

→ they work alone, in pairs or in bigger groups.

We rarely see the “nameless warriors” working alone - in case of danger or mission, they form a small army and do as they are commanded by Grandmaster (MKX) or one of master assassins, like Bi-Han (Mortal Kombat 2021). In contrast various sources show that named characters usually worked in pairs (Smoke & Tundra, Cyrax & Sektor, Sub-Zero/Bi-Han & Hydro) or alone (Bi-Han, Frost) and in some special cases, commanded larger groups of warriors.

This is an interesting detail, because all the named warriors seem to be to some degree familiar with each other even though it looks like they were permanently paired. Of course, training together will have this effect, but Lin Kuei operated world-wide and in different realms so it is not guaranteed that warriors had time to hang out between missions or to be at the same time in headquarters. If they possessed diverse, opposing elements, after passing the trials and earning the title of warrior, they could be trained separately. Thus again, a smaller chance to form (forbidden) friendship. Which is why I think there must be some exercises that force fighters to cooperate or test their skills in some sort of tournaments. Partially to see how well they fare in fight (thus judge their usefulness to clan), partially to establish hierarchy between them.

Who and how decides about pairing certain fighters is completely a mystery. On one hand, Hydro (water) and Sub-Zero (ice) were compatible and probably naturally increased their own powers. But we also have Kuai Liang (ice) and Tomas (smoke) whose elements seem like not the best combination since Smoke’s power should work better with fire (at least his battle cry, “Where there is Smoke, there is fire!” suggests that) and there is Cyrax and Sektor who powerwise may work well, but their mindsets are extremely different.

Are warriors forced into such partnerships by their superiors or were they allowed to find the right partner, sadly we do not know. On one hand, the dynamic between named characters makes an impression they are in fact an equal partners - Smoke joined Kuai Liang in his quest for revenge on his own (MK9), Sektor didn’t manage to force Cyrax into submission before the man left the clan. Comics!Sub-Zero and Hydro were so close that “Bi-Han” wasn’t afraid to admit his fears of undead Scorpion relentlessly haunting him and Hydro was supportive all the time (“Blood and Thunder”). On the other hand, partnership could provide additional safety and increase the chances of survival during missions and maybe even uphold an already earned social position, so the warriors may seek each other for solely pragmatic reasons, even more since friendship was seen as a weakness and forbidden. I also suspect that though partnership between two warriors was based on mutual benefits, there could be fierce competition between pairs.

Surprisingly, all known to us partnerships are between male characters. There is no gender-mixed duo as far as sources are concerned (unless comics!Hydro was female, trans- or agender person and frankly, for 4 comics issues only one narrator box used the pronunciation of “he” for Hydro, while Scorpion was constantly called by Lin Kuei, other characters or narratives as “he”, which always makes me wonder about Hydro’s gender. Or did comics!Lin Kuei warriors talk about themselves in third person to not betray their and their comrades true identity / gender?). Regardless of the nature of said partnership, those working together share a strong bond. Kuai Liang and Tomas outright considered themselves very close friends (family) despite clan rules that forbidden friendship. Bi-Han was willing to show his weakness / fear to Hydro who in return was very protective of him and even Sektor shows a pathological need to keep Cyrax at his side despite all the oblivious signs how unwise this decision is. Frost, sadly, didn’t have any named partner (what may be related to her role of chief between female Lin Kuei warriors) and if she was included in an important mission, she partnered Grandmaster (MK: Deadly Alliance). And their collaboration was based on a master-apprentice relationship, so it had none of the equality that characterizes the previously mentioned duos.

Of course, ultimately, the warrior who works alone does not need to share the fame (and earning?) with anyone. Bi-Han is the best example of that (Mythologies: Sub-Zero, Mortal Kombat novel (1995) or his bio from the original game). And yes, every warrior should be capable of completing the job, but though weak Lin Kuei fighters may look superhuman in Earthrealm they will not last long in Outworld.

And that brings us to another important matter:

→ the place of activity.

Because those who work frequently in Outworld by default should be considered better in the combat area. But at the same time, Lin Kuei must have a wide and well organized spy network, to keep track of all potential recruits (Smoke and Cyrax), access to science research and laboratories and so on. So, especially in modern times, combat skills may not be the most appreciated feature anymore and some Lin Kuei warriors, no matter how weak they are compared to others, will still have their special value to Grandmaster’s plans. Due to the nature of spying, they could also work alone or in small groups far from their homeland. Thus, operate outside the social hierarchy established between other warriors.

→ Punishments

A warrior could die on mission at any moment, but also could be killed for various offenses, such as:

Leaving the clan - punished by death and this seems to be a consistent punishment in all sources. Of course a determined warrior could manage to successfully run away (like Takeda, the founder of Shirai Ryu or Kuai Liang did) but Lin Kuei does not forget such crime and will hunt down the fugitive for years. The best example comes from the Mortal Kombat book, in which Sub-Zero spent two decades hunting down his own ex-partner in crime to kill him in a brutal way in front of the man's family.

So even if someone managed to run away and start a new life, there was no escape from the clan's wrath. In the modern time, Cyrax was captured and cyborgized - for him, it was fate worse than death. This actually brings the question, if there were warriors responsible for hunting down fugitives or was it the duty of those whose partners broke the sacred rule of “no one leaves Lin Kuei”?

Failure of mission - another known major crime punishable by death yet most likely not applies to Kuai LIang’s reformed clan.

In the Conquest TV series, by Grandmaster’s order two warriors that failed the mission were killed by then current Sub-Zero. This was as much public execution to show others what happens once you fail as presenting the ice powers of freshly promoted cryomancer:

“Before you stand two who have failed. For this there can be but one consequence and it must come from within, within us. Earth, wind, fire, water. To control one element of the four that make up life is power. A twist of nature, an aberration, one who brings forth true killing force. Before you stand one whose ancestors have passed on such power to us. Remember this well. Behold... Sub Zero. [Grandmaster’s speech, episode 3, “Cold Reality”]”

This is just one example from the distant past but it may also be a suggestion that warriors with special powers played the role of executors.

Another example, from Mythologies: Sub-Zero, thus relative modern times:

Scorpion: Yessss... I am Scorpion. You killed me in cold blood.

Sub-Zero: I had no choice. If I had not stolen that map I would be the dead one.

Frankly this attitude is both inhuman treatment of subordinates (failure in itself is just another source of experiences and sometimes failed mission wasn't the result of someone’s mistake or incompetence but of independent circumstances) and unpragmatic (losing manpower). We may only wonder if warriors were punished for failing all kinds of missions or just selected ones. At the same time, a fighter that survived to old age should be really respected - with such harsh laws, not many members live to old age and those who did through the decades failed little to no missions.

Lin Kuei punished also impostors:

which brings us back to the point about codenames and their relationship with social position (and hey, Noob’s complaints aren’t baseless). We don’t know though what kind of punishment was used for such an offense.

Disobeying Grandmaster was also a big deal. I suspect this could be punished by death too although rather not in Kuai Liang’s clan:

“When Sub-Zero made historic peace with his clan’s enemy, Scorpion, defiant Frost challenged her Grandmaster as unfit to lead. Sub-Zero defeated and banished Frost. [MK11]”

In general, Lin Kuei laws were harsh and cruel and it was really easy to lose such hard-earned privileges and positions.

Recruits

In ancient times, children were abducted at the age of 5 or 6 and forced into harh training. Some didn’t survive but those who did became fully pledged to Lin Kuei warriors. In modern times, it seems like most adepts have some blood-ties to other members of the clan and usually are “given” for training freely. There are exceptions to the rule, like Bi-Han and Kuai Liang, who were stolen from home at a young age. Finally, there are people who seem to join Lin Kuei on their own (or at least they think it was their choice), like Smoke, Cyrax and Frost.

(Tomas and Frost are confirmed users of special powers. Cyrax most likely possesses some unique genes too or at least is capable of well controlling his own energy (chi) during fight. Frankly, it looks like Sektor is the only one named Lin Kuei who does not utilize any special power. Ironically, considering how Grandmaster (Oniro) from Defenders of the Earthrealm was shapeshifter. Who knows, maybe Sektor didn’t inherited father’s unique skills?)

So even recruits are a diverse group to begin with and include people ethnically totally different from the majority(?) who needed to learn a new language(s) and culture from scratch. This alone gives a ground for potential conflicts though there is little to none examples of racism between Lin Kuei adult members? I mean, Lin Kuei used to look down on everyone who wasn’t one of them all the same, with special hatred for Shirai-Ryu - not for being Japanese (different ethinc group) but just for being Shirai-Ryu.

The adepts were trained by older warriors and looking at Sub-Zero’s origin (MK9), some adepts trained with family members (Kuai Liang and Bi-Han and maybe even under their Grandfather’s eye?) and teacher (Sifu?) could train more than one student at the same time.

In a way, those coming from the lineage of warriors could be from the start at better social standing than those who were “no ones” or came from far away lands and needed to earn respect of others. Those blood-related to clan members either developed specific powers during training or at least possesed special DNA that could be passed down to the next generation. So, even if those children weren’t the best of best fighters, they still have something valuable to the clan.

At the same time, again, Sektor doesn’t seem to have any special privileges, not once in game(s) called his father as anything other than Grandmaster and in general, he did not have much presence (respect?) between other warriors. I mean, he freely spoke only with Cyrax who in the end did not listen to him at all and almost always fell silent if there were more people around. So yeah, how big an impact on social dynamic between fighters had their blood-ties is not sure.

I’m not gonna talk much about the life of adepts (and there is a lot to say about potential pathologies and harm done to the kids), but they for sure were the lowest rank in (warrior) hierarchy, at least until they proved their worth.

So, the Lin Kuei warriors could be separated in three categories, from lower social rank to the highest:

adepts (in-training, maybe assisting in missions under the watchful eye of their superiors),

warriors (the one earning income),

veterans (teachers)

and the circle was completed.

(For some reason, the circle of Lin Kuei warrior life resembles the “Three-field system” but I have weird associations, I guess).

Household?

When we talk about the Lin Kuei clan, the first association that comes to mind is its warrior nature. But with such a large organisation, warriors are just one social class rather than the majority. Because someone needs to feed them, cloth, arm, heal, which seems logical to assume that there were other specializations that keep the clan running.

I mean, Lin Kuei is an independent faction that as far as we know, has no ties to any earthrealm government. This alone suggests to keep that independence the clan have to possess their own source of food, water, medical supplies and access to other necessary resources, so no enemy could besiege their strongholds and starve them and so on.

⇒ The medics will be for sure an appreciated branch of the clan. And yes, warriors to some degree must have medical knowledge (if not to save people then at least to know how to successfully kill them) but at the same, with so many specific genes and used in fight elements, some Lin Kuei members may have different medical needs than normal people.

⇒ Armorers (and smiths?) provide clan additional defensive equipment and weapons. And we know that even in modern times Lin Kuei barely used firearms and relied more on shurikens, knives and swords.

⇒ Scientists, computer experts and researchers, especially in modern times when C.I. Project became a thing, most likely playing a big role in the clan, fulfilling Grandmaster’s wish to change warriors into cyborgs. May not be liked by the traditionalist members of Lin Kuei, but favored by the leader (so be untouchable).

⇒ Farmers and craftsmen, providing the clan with the basic needs. I doubt they had much impact on social dynamics and may not even live on the grounds of the Lin Kuei Temple / Fortress. I imagine them living in the surrounding villages (or at the foot of the mountains?), giving the Lin Kuei food and handicrafts (and maybe even their own children?) as a tribute, and in return get protection.

My conclusion is that, Lin Kuei have pretty complex social structures in which Grandmaster and his closes circle administrate the whole system, warriors, depending on their age and expertises, are responsible for earning money and prepare the new generation to replace them, while household is there to keep previously mentioned groups alive and in the best condition. Everyone plays a role that helps to maintain Lin Kuei independence and reputation.

So, finally I get to the main part of the question about the dynamic between characters.

Who outrank who is a good question. The Grandmaster of course is above everyone else and so are the “ancient masters” / inner circle. Bi-Han seems to be one of the favored warriors by Grandmaster, the only(?) one confirmed to be the most cunning assassin and thief and the use of a codename associated with “ancient power” only adds to that impression. So, in regard to the named five characters (him, Kuai Liang, Smoke, Cyrax and Sektor) I would say Bi-Han outranked everyone. At the same time, he does not act arrogant against his fellow clansmen. Okay, to be honest, he seems to not interact much with anyone but that is rather the abrasive, asocial nature of cryomancer than anything else, really. And we have examples from various sources that Bi-Han wasn’t always rude to people around him. (Noob is another deal, but even then he has a more passive-aggressive attitude toward his brother than outright hate / arrogance).

Anyway, Bi-Han outranked the others. And yet, he does not seem to perform any special social functions - except maybe at Grandmaster’s command executing those who failed. In contrast, in MKX intro vs. Sonya, Frost was described by Kuai Liang as “chief among [female Lin Kuei]” which implies her high rank and responsible position in social structures.

One may wonder why Bi-Han most likely wasn’t given similar honor but to be an effective chief, the person must be available and close at hand. Going with Mythologies, the elder Sub-Zero barely came back from one mission (stealing map of elements) to be sent right away for another difficult task (stealing Shinnok amulet and side trip to Netherrealm) and then next one (Mortal Kombat Tournament). Of course, the game due to its limited time and space, won’t focus on realism such as making a proper preparation for the job but even if Bi-Han was allowed little rest between one and another mission, it really looks like he didn’t spend much time at Lin Kuei Temple. Thus there was no point in giving him any big group to oversee, if he wasn’t available to control what was going on between his subordinates. Also, he seems pretty familiar with Smoke and Kuai Liang’s close relationship but there are not many hints that he tried to do something about their breaking clan rules forbidding friendship.

Then again, there is a possibility that Kuai Liang, Smoke, Cyrax and Sektor did in fact belong to Bi-Han’s own “cohort” what could explain

A) why all the five characters are always so closely tied up to each other while the rest of clan members are just a background and

B) why with Sub-Zero’s death everything went to hell between them.

(And again, the amount of duties to female Lin Kuei could keep Frost from leaving headquarters too often, thus no need for partnership with anyone. Because of that, she grew angry at Kuai Liang for “holding her back” and at the same time not respecting enough to grant her the title of Sub-Zero).

Pragmatic resolution to solving inner conflict would be some kind of neutral judge (chief) and the fight for rank and position most likely happened under watch of superior(s). As in, official challenge, especially for top ranks like Sub-Zero. The official fight did not need to end with someone’s death but this could be one of rare situations when a warrior could kill the other fighter - or even the hated teacher / master? - without much consequence. Of course, Lin Kuei proved pragmatism is not always a priority but I strongly believe the clan structures were based on discipline and so arbitrary fights were also severely punished. What is the point of having warriors if they can’t be sent to earn money due to unnecessary injuries? Also, corporal punishment in itself shouldn’t be that big deal for society growing up in brutal ways since early childhood - which is why I suspect that the punishments were administered in public. As a form of humiliation, to force the guilty people to earn respect of fellow warriors again from scratch.

I suspect that warriors could be separated into smaller groups - basing on their special powers or family connection? - that competed with each other. Age could also regulate how one person should act around the others; for example, like youngling around veteran or fully trained fighter. Not sure how this rule could relate to those representing “household”. Were there laws protecting them or could they be bullied/killed on whim? Could warriors even be involved romantically with “servants” / lower class? The good thing from such affair could be the birth of children given to the clan once they were old enough and well, sex with “outsider” in itself can be a good way to relieve the warriors growing tension / stress resulting from living in a brutal environment without complicating things between companions. To be fair, some warriors could have romantic / intimate relationships with each other as well but most likely kept them secret to avoid punishment.

There is also a matter of who and how chose warriors to represent Lin Kuei at Mortal Kombat Tournament. I mean, Bi-Han was always the first choice, supported by the first game and Mythologies but did he choose Sektor and Cyrax as his companions or they naturally were chosen as part of his group or did Grandmaster assign them to Sub-Zero on his own? Dunno but keeping the five named Lin Kuei warriors together through the course of years really makes me think they came from the same, for a lack of better word, a cohort.

Cryomancers most likely stuck together (Bi-Han and Kuai Liang) and Smoke tagged along. Cyrax looks like an easy going type of person who isn't afraid to speak his mind so I wouldn’t be surprised if he were either on good terms with most clan members or pissing the rest while human Sektor, in contrast, is much more introverted, or even withdrawn from social interaction. This is of course only my subjective feeling, but he lacks a dominant presence to make a big impression. Not like the older Sub-Zero or Cyrax. Then we have Tundra!Kuai Liang whose loyalty belongs first and foremost to an older brother than the clan itself and to honor Bi-Han he will get into all sorts of dangerous problems and conflicts not caring for consequences at all. A behaviour that may not sit well with Sektor (even more, if he never had such a strong bond with own father/other people?). Sektor and Kuai Liang have a long history of ideological conflict and I suspect they truly could agree only about not giving up Cyrax’s remains to anyone and whatever was going on, protect the body at all cost.

Interestingly, as much as Kuai Liang and Tomas or Kuai Liang and Cyrax were close and on good terms (especially after the fiasco of C.I. project), Bi-Han and Sektor seem to be much closer to each other. If not in the stricte emotional sense, they at least share the pride in Lin Kuei and strive for perfection (manifesting itself in accepting their drastic changes for example). Even with limited sources, the storyline never(?) put Sektor and Bi-Han against each other, either as humans or cyborg and wraith and I strongly suspect there may be something much deeper about their relationship that lack of interaction on screen could suggest in the first place (x)(x).

Then we have tradition vs technology.

This most likely is a modern issue that could be the basis for serious inner conflicts between warriors. Those taking jobs in Outworld for sure must be powerful fighters, especially since technology is not something working well there. Bi-Han in most if not all sources was a traditionalist who didn’t use much or outright refused to use technology and I wouldn’t be surprised if he worked in Outworld frequently (especially Bi-Han in the newest movie was presented as a close associate of Shang Tsung). For the weaker warriors, advanced technology could be a life-saver. Then there is the whole Cyber Initiative that divided (and ultimately destroyed) Lin Kuei. For such a project, the clan either worked with independent / private researchers and cybernetic experts or actually had its own specialists (another possible social group?).

From MK9 we know Cyrax spoke in public against Grandmaster’s plan. In Defenders of the Realm, Smoke and Kuai Liang run from the clan at the first occasion to avoid such fate. Logically thinking, Sektor (supporter of the advanced technology) should not get along well with Bi-Han (stubborn traditionalist), the same as he fell out with Cyrax, Smoke and Kuai Liang. And yet there is not much evidence suggesting any big conflict between them. Of course, Sektor could simply not speak against his superior(?) the same as he argued with Cyrax but in all fairness, I doubt Bi-Han’s lack of use of technology was a secret not openly critiqued by others. I mean, even comics!Kuai Liang said about his brother that Bi-Han was “stubborn in many ways, refused to utilize modern technology on his missions. A shame, really. He was among the Lin Kuei’s finest --although fast becoming obsolete”. If Sektor and Bi-Han (and the rest of the group) worked together on joint missions, the issue of technology would come sooner than later. Though I suspect that no matter what Sektor would say, Bi-Han outstubborn him anyway. On other hand, it looks like only Sektor needed/chose to use advanced technology (flame thrower) while the rest relied on their special powers. In that case, being Sektor between gifted people for sure was a hard deal.

So, if I have to rank them I would say Bi-Han → Sektor & Cyrax who most likely were at least a bit higher than Kuai Liang (younger cryomancer) and Smoke. In case of conflict, I think as long as it was possible, they solved their problems among themselves. Bringing authority (Grandmaster, one of chiefs(?) or Bi-Han)’s attention was never a good idea because it could lead to public punishment / humiliation. Bi-Han may or may not knock some sense into others if the inner conflict gets out of hand or at least told them into face how idiotic they are (and he is pretty famous for insulting/mocking even those he shouldn’t. Like Quan Chi, a powerful client. Which is why I doubt he would tone down his natural abrasiveness. Especially not for an idiot that actually deserves it ).

And yet, whatever conflict was between those five characters, they still stayed loyal to each other. At least until someone outright broke one of the most punishable laws, like leaving the clan.

For example, Cyrax and Sektor argued about C.I. project - and most likely it was already an ongoing argument between them. Cyrax even was “among those speaking out against the Grand Master’s plan”. Not a good thing for their partnership yet Sektor still vouched for Cyrax when Shang Tsung had his doubts about the man. Or how Bi-Han changed sides during Tournament (MK9) - otherwise his fight against Scorpion would have zero sense - and maybe he did discuss the course of his action with his fellow clan members. But whatever he told or not what was going on, Cyrax was absolutely ready to kill Scorpion to avenge fallen cryomancer (“Scorpion will pay for this!”). Then we have Smoke not abandoning Kuai Liang even though he was already turned into Cyber Sub-Zero and attacked his friend and of course furious Tundra interrupting the Outworld Tournament and literally demanding from the Emperor to bring him Bi-Han’s murderer to kill. Hell, even Noob and Cyber Sektor stick to each other despite everything that happened.

Those five were a really loyal group, weren’t they?

So, in general:

the social structures of Lin Kuei were diverse and complex,

the punishment was harsh and deadly - in some cases, executed by a fellow warrior in public.

Bi-Han most likely had a high position in clan hierarchy but he wasn’t outright called a master

and there is possibility Sektor, Cyrax, Smoke and Kuai Liang worked under his command.

Most of the Lin Kuei members share blood ties to some degree but experiences and skills seem to outrank any family bond. In contrast to friendship, keeping touch with family (within the clan) is rather not forbidden. There may be a conflict between friendship (a choice) and family matters (a fate / tradition of serving Lin Kuei to uphold).

Kuai Liang and Smoke broke clan rules forbidding friendship (and Bi-Han did nothing about that?).

Cyrax most likely were familiar with Tundra and Smoke enough to like / respect each other. In the case of Tomas, the additional factor for keeping together could be the fact that both were born as outsiders (different ethnicity, lack of blood ties to clan).

Cyrax and Kuai Liang had ideological conflict with Sektor, who in turn seems to be on good terms with Bi-Han.

Bi-Han on the other hand seemed to not have any conflict with the four named warriors? Kuai Liang was his brother (and there is no example he was abused in any way by the older sibling, I think?), MK9!Smoke may not be on a first name basis with Bi-Han (didn’t call him in game as anything else than Sub-Zero or Kuai Liang’s brother) but he was accepted as Kuai Liang’s close friend. At the beggining of Tournament, Cyrax was seen on Sub-Zero’s right side and there is the scene-parallel (with Sektor cut off from the frame, the impression is that we were shown the honorable/”good” Lin Kuei) and he showed protectiveness toward Sub-Zero.Then there is Sektor who somehow get along with Bi-Han (and Noob) without any complaints or problems. Of course, Smoke, Cyrax and Sektor could be smart enough to not get in any open conflict with abrasive Bi-Han. Kuai Liang is a whole different matter, I guess.

The named characters in fact didn’t need to like each other but they were taught discipline and loyalty to the group from the start. Though it would be really hilarious if the most abrasive cryomancer with little to no social skills was in fact the one that keep them all together and was a bridge between strong-willed/hotheaded Kuai Liang & Smoke, independent Cyrax and blindly loyal, withdrawn Sektor.

I’m not sure if such a mix of strong personalities was the norm between warrior groups or was it just Bi-Han’s luck to get involved with duos of Tundra-Smoke and Sektor-Cyrax at some point. Anyway, this is my take on social structures and dynamics between Lin Kuei.

Hope it satisfies your curiosity!

[gryffindors-weasley]

Finding A Light

Ron Weasley x Fem!Reader

Summary: Ron was left broken in the aftermath of the wizarding war. In an attempt to build a better life, he feels he may have unknowingly met someone who could put those pieces back together.

Warnings: angst, mentions of death, grieving, fluff

A/N: Remus is very much alive in this series! This will be more than one part, I hope you enjoy!

Ron Weasley was a man of few words when presented the daunting task of expressing his emotions, preferring to stuff them down and deal with the consequences later. He never outright says what he’s feeling unless it’s pried from him, and in those times it’s usually expressed through anger. He isn’t great with his words either, so it didn’t come as a surprise to Harry and Hermione to see him so closed off after the war had concluded its disastrous rampage.

It was a battle that anyone and everyone involved was more than likely to never forget, the losses and hardships engraved in their minds as a permanent reminder should their memory allow it as they age. Some had come out on the other side more fortunate than others. Some had handled it far better than others. Ron was not one of those people.

His long awaited ambitions on becoming an Auror were rapidly diminished and pushed to the very back of his mind for a good while. He had wanted absolutely nothing to do with magic beyond that very day, thought that maybe if he hadn’t used it, it wouldn’t remind him of his tragedies. That maybe that part of his life would be forgotten in time if he tried hard enough. So, his wand, his robes, his Hogwarts letters and what was left of his sentimental wizarding memorabilia were hastily shoved into a cardboard box, taped shut and stuffed away to collect dust. Out of sight out of mind was his reasoning, though it didn’t quite work out that way.

The loss of his childhood home paired with the devastating loss of one of his older brothers had been a weight too heavy to bear, pressing down on his chest with each day that passed. He nearly lost two of his closest friends amidst the chaos the Dark Lord left in his wake. Such a lifetime of pain and loss was something he never anticipated to experience all by the young age of eighteen, and it left him feeling like a mere shell of the person he once used to be. As if the years of extraordinary magical endeavors prior to that day were completely erased and replaced with utter heartache.

It took him four years to bring himself out of the pit he found himself stuck in and find some semblance of strength, if only for his mother, and he wanted to build a better life for himself. One without so much sorrow written into his story. He wasn’t entirely sure how to go about doing so, knowing a return to a normal life simply wouldn’t be feasible. Not that his life had ever been considered normal per say.

The emotional scars were something that would never go away, he understood that, but he didn’t think he could go another day having the same mundane routine night and day. He felt ready for more.

Now, at the age of twenty-two coming up on twenty-three, he found himself returning to Hogwarts with hopes to become a professor. His heart nearly beat out of his chest when he arrived, sick to his stomach with nerves as he stopped and stood in the middle of the newly constructed stone bridge. His letter crinkled under the pressure of his tightly clenched hand, luggage in the other, eager students curving their stride to avoid running into him. The castle was more grand than he’d remembered it to be, perhaps they’d made it bigger to house more young witches and wizards, perhaps it wasn’t. Either way, against his instincts, he forced himself to swallow the lump in his throat and continue forward before he convinced himself to turn around and apparate home.

He quickly found that things had been kept fairly the same as he roamed the grand halls in curiosity, as similar to the school he’d grown up in as it could be. The wondrous ceiling of enchanted candles in the Great Hall was a detail that briefly gave him watery eyes; the varying hues of reds, oranges and yellows coloring the Gryffindor common room, down to the house flags pridefully ornamenting the new quidditch pitch. He found himself turning to express his awe to Harry or Hermione on more than one occasion, but was only met with the unfamiliar faces of new students. His shoulders would slump as he exhaled a deep sigh.

It had taken him nearly two months to fully adjust to his newfound routine, to come to terms with the memories that flashed in his mind of their own volition. Whether they be good or bad, they had a habit of making themselves known at the worst of times. Over the course of that time period crumpled pieces of parchment had accumulated around the desk in his room, unsent letters to his mother of his wishes to return home. All of which were written hastily in either frustration or tears, or a mixture of the two. And of the ones he had sent, they were promptly returned with enchanted letters vocally telling him with the utmost of love and sternness that he will be staying, he needs this. Those letters kept him going on those days.

Amongst those days and nights it was strange not having his two best friends there, loneliness still having its hold on him.

Remus Lupin had made his return all the more welcome though, himself and McGonagall being two of the only familiar faces that he’d truly connected with. He felt it was an honor to be taken under his wing and trained, he always had been Ron’s favorite instructor of Defense Against The Dark Arts. He’d even go so far as to say he’s the best if he was being honest.

Regardless, despite his own personal conflicts, he was beginning to feel more comfortable residing there than he had ever thought he would. It was as if the nagging rain cloud dumping over his head was starting to dissipate for the time being.

“You did very good today, Ron,” Lupin says once his final class of the day has left, “the teaching of boggarts is never easy I’ll say, and if I recall correctly it wasn’t your favorite lesson.”

Ron chuckles at the thought, pushing his chair in when he stood. “Not particularly. I still have a nightmare or two about that bloody spider.”

Lupin laughs, nodding at the pleasant memory. Things fall quiet for a few moments as Ron moves to sling his bag over his shoulder. “Off you go, Mr. Weasley, enjoy your weekend,” he urges, grabbing Ron’s attention again before he gets too far. “Here’s your weekly report. You’re becoming a fine up and coming professor I’d say. I have no doubt that I will be leaving my classroom in the best possible care.”

Ron nods with a soft laugh, cheeks flushing a pale crimson at the reassurance as he takes the parchment from him, tucking it into his bag to be read later. “Thank you, Professor Lupin, really. It means a lot to hear.”

He smiles appreciatively before making his way across the long classroom, stopping in his tracks. He takes a breath to gather his thoughts before spinning on his heel to face him again, returning to the desk he sat at. “Can I ask you a question?”

“I suppose.”

He offers Ron a smile upon seeing the clear hesitancy written all over his face. Ron gulps, fumbling with the strap of his bag that rested on his shoulder. He could practically see the gears turning in the ginger boy’s head if such a thing existed. “Was it…was it hard coming back here? After the war, I mean.”

Lupin huffs out a soft laugh at the sudden ask of such a deep question, though he can’t say he was surprised. “I was waiting for this question to arise,” he says, lifting a hand to stop Ron from apologizing. “To give a short answer, yes. It took great thought. To give a long answer, one you may not like but I’m sure you already know, there will always be bad days after experiencing such trauma. It is not easy being born into a life where magic is real and not just a trick of the eye. While it can be wonderful it also brings with it a great deal of damage.”

Ron nods as he listens to his words, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

“Despite all of it, Hogwarts is a place that can be good just as much as it can be bad. You just have to take it in your stride. You’re stronger than you think, Ron. If you really want to be here, I believe it is worth it to try.”

Ron exhales deeply, taking a moment to process his insightful words, a certain wisdom he appreciated. It left him feeling considerably lighter than he had before, like he was a bit more hopeful of a better experience here. “Thank you.”

That’s all he can manage to say.

The blue eyed man in front of him nods. “Go on now, you’ve had a long day, Weasley.”

—

Ron found himself to be rather excited for this weekend. It would be his first time making a trip to Hogsmeade in nearly five years, though he’d been putting it off because the experience wasn’t quite the same when doing it alone. Third years buzzed around him with the excitement of their newfound privileges and independence, bouncing from shop to shop to fully take in all that it had to offer.

He, however, walked at a leisurely pace amongst the students bustling around him, taking a moment to fully appreciate everything he hadn’t seen for so long. Catching details that otherwise went unnoticed like the chipping pink paint on the curved windowsills of Madam Puddifoot’s Tea Shop, and the happy young couples residing inside. The vibrant green moss that formed inbetween the crumbling cracks of the old cobblestone walkways. However, the sight of Zonko’s Joke Shop made his heart lurch in his chest the moment he saw it.

He averted his gaze immediately, swallowing thickly as he tugged at his shirt collar that suddenly felt a little too constricting. It had been Fred and George’s favorite shop to frequent, always buying new things to add to their inventory of pranks. But now that one half of the pair was missing it wasn’t such a fond memory anymore, moreso a taunting one.

The sound of a couple students joyously greeting with a chorus of ‘Hi Mr. Weasley!’ pulled him from his thoughts and he was quick to smile, giving them a half wave as they had already begun to walk away. He let his hand fall back to his side, huffing out a sigh as he continued to walk along the path towards the one place he looked forward to the most, Honeydukes.

The little bell overhead alerted his entrance as he opened the door, the air noticeably sweeter than outside. He found himself smiling as his gaze bounced around the near unchanged shop, any candy you could possibly think of lining almost every brightly painted wall. Though not every single one is a desireable find, he learned that one the hard way. He almost didn’t know where to begin, much like how he felt the first time he ever entered the place, and every time after that for that matter. So he perused the shop, something he’s never done by himself.

His eyes landed on familiar chocolates, and he was quick to grab a box for Hermione because he knows they’re her favorite. Despite such knowledge she still adamantly denies having a sweet tooth to this day. To go along with that, he snags one of the last chocolate frogs for Harry.

It was a fond memory when he thought of it, a tradition they’d had as young students. He’s still got the cards he’d collected from each frog, they were tucked away in that box filled with other things. Maybe when he returned home he’d have the courage to reopen it.

He continues to look around for a bit more, finding himself wishing he had the same sense of enjoyment and innocence as some of the younger students held. For they were fortunate enough to narrowly miss being involved with such negative events. He had to remind himself that it wasn’t looming over his head anymore, to let himself enjoy this very moment. So, he tried his best to clear his mind and bring himself back to his current situation in the middle of an aisle filled with hard candies.

When he had turned the corner of said aisle he collided with something, someone to be more specific, the box clutched in his hands opening on impact and sending the assortment of sweets clattering to the ground with the addition of others. The chocolate frog had fell from its decorative box and hopped out of sight before he could process it.

“I’m so sorry!” A soft voice sounds in front of him, a warm hand enveloping his wrist.

“It’s okay…” Ron trails off when he matches the voice to its owner, blinking slowly as his mouth hangs slightly agape. He found himself staring at the girl, he was quite sure he’d never seen someone so alluring, so captivating. He didn’t know if he could manage to stop gawking. “I-it’s okay.”

His cheeks redden when he realized he’s repeated himself, the fiery heat of embarrassment burning from the very tips of his ears down to his neck, leaving his pale skin flushed. You too came to the realization that you were still gripping his arm, quickly dropping it as you laughed softly to stave off any awkward silence. He averts his eyes momentarily, needing a moment to regain his composure and not make a complete fool of himself in front of the prettiest girl he’d ever seen. Though he’s quite sure he already has.

“I told Mr. Flume it shouldn’t be quite so cramped in here, but he never seems to listen,” you laugh, looking at the smattering of sweets scattered around the two of them. Ron was focused less on the mishap and more on the way you smiled brightly at him, knowing his cheeks were undoubtedly the same shade as his hair. “Give me just one moment, please!”

He nods just a little too late as you rush off around another corner and out of sight, leaving him to stand there awkwardly as students in the vicinity stared at the mess sprawled at his feet. Shortly, you indeed did come back, a new box of chocolates and what was now the last chocolate frog in your hands. You thrusted them in his direction with a warm smile, one that made his heart flip in his chest. “Take these, it’s on the house.”

“Oh I couldn’t do that,” Ron rushes.

“Please, it was my mistake. I insist.”

He laughs softly, nodding after a moment. “At least let me help you clean up?”

You nod up at him with a laugh of your own, “deal.”

He tries not to think about the way your fingers brush over his as they pick up chocolates from the checkered floor, tossing them into the nearby trash bin. And he tried not to think about the way you’d had his stomach twisting in knots as if he was a thirteen year old again experiencing his first crush.

“I’m Y/n, by the way.”

He scrambled to think of a response, seemingly forgetting his own name momentarily. It hadn’t gotten any better when you looked up at him politely as if waiting for a response. “I’m Ron…Ron Weasley.”

He could’ve kicked himself for being so awkward, knowing him stumbling over his words couldn’t possibly give off any sort of appeal. He brushed his hands off with a sigh as he stood to his feet. Though you didn’t seem to mind his nerves as you brushed your hands off on your jeans.

“Nice to meet you, Ron. I only wished it were on better circumstances.” The pale blush on your face deepened a shade.

“That’s quite alright,” he says with an airy laugh, brushing his hair out of his eyes. “It was nice meeting you too.”

That same silence took up the absence in conversation again as Ron tried desperately to think of something to say, not quite ready for the interaction to be over. You beat him to it.

“I hope to see you around here again, maybe without the mess,” you say with a soft smile, “and don’t forget your chocolates.”

He was confused for a moment, too caught up in the way your eyes sparkled as they looked at him, or the way your hair fell around your face before following where you’d been pointing. “Oh! Y-yeah…thank you,” He grabbed his sweets in his shaky hands, feeling rather bold suddenly, “I’ll see you around then, Y/n.”

He was sure your words were only friendly, something you probably said often as a kind gesture. Probably not because you actually wanted to see him again. But he let himself think otherwise if only for a moment.

You simply nod, your grin widening a fraction, “bye Ron.”

—

Ron’s lifted spirits did not go unnoticed, not by Mrs. McGonagall who made it a point to bring it up at dinner later that evening. He could tell she picked up on it, could tell by the very way she’d glanced at him frequently. Though he wasn’t sure he was hiding it very well. He pretended not to notice, focusing his gaze on the rows of tables occupied by dozens upon dozens of students seated at them, the hardwood adorned with some of the best food he’s ever eaten. Second only to his mother.

“Is there a particular reason you’re so cheery, Mr. Weasley?” She finally asks, and he sighs at the question.

“Not particularly,” he responds using her wording, glancing at her as a smile pulls at the left corner of his mouth. He watches as she raises a skeptical brow; he knows what’s coming.

“I haven’t seen you smile like that in a number of years, Ronald. I know when you’re lying,” she says with a soft laugh, though she doesn’t pry.

Ron chuckles down at his plate as he shakes his head, pushing his food around as he thought about her. The way she smiled at him, so brightly the corners of her eyes crinkled. It still felt as though those butterflies were still fluttering around in his stomach. He quickly found himself wanting to hear your voice again, or hear your laughter—

“I’ve met a wonderful person today, that’s all,” he blurts, looking to his side.

She gave him a fond yet knowing smile, nodding her head. “I know the look of young love when I see it.”

“I’m not in love, Mrs. McGonagall,” he urges almost immediately, cheeks reddening once more at her preposterous conclusion, “I’ve only just met her today.”

“If you insist, my dear.”

“I do insist.” He tries to be sure of himself despite his inability to get you off his mind, but he hides his smile behind his goblet as he takes a sip.

Later that night he went to bed with something other than sorrow clouding his thoughts, instead feeling rather optimistic about the week ahead. Or maybe it was the plans he’d had at the end of it that had him so eager, time feeling agonizingly slow. It was definitely that. He couldn’t wait to see you next Saturday.

—

[saphirered]

Heyy, is it alright to ask for a verin x reader, like where verin realizes he likes the reader, but is conflicted because the reader is a part of the mighty nein

Boyyyy this one turned out longer than I intended. No matter, here it is in all its fluff and glory. Hope you enjoy! 😘

-

You are funny, smart, a quick learner, an expert fighter. You are generous, gorgeous, fierce, loyal to the people you care about. You never claim to always know everything. You own up to your mistakes and seek to make right your own wrongs whenever you can. You consider others before you think of yourself. You show kindness and compassion to those who have not known it in a long time. Your smile, your laugh, the glint of mischievous amusement in your eyes whenever you’re plotting something, the adoration and approval to those you deem deserving of it, the affection in your eyes when-

Verin could go on and on but he shouldn’t. He can’t. It’s taken him a while to figure out this isn’t some simple attraction towards you. There’s already feelings involved, definitely from his side and he’s not foolish enough to downplay the gentle but obvious hints you’ve been dropping for him confirming in no uncertain terms this is not a one-sided infatuation. Neither of you have acted on it and he’s thankful for at least that because if he hadn’t stopped and thought for a moment he would have indulged himself in your affection should you have given it and he doesn’t know if he’d ever be able to let you go.

Leave it to your matchmaker friends to invite him and his brother to a dinner with the rest of the Nein and seating him right next to you. It’s not he doesn’t want to be at your side, quite the opposite actually. Verin would love spending more time with you. It’s simply the fact that at the end of the day you might be at opposing sides and he doesn’t know what he’d do if that situation arose. So rather he would avoid the possibility all together. You can’t lose what you never had. You can’t fail at something you never started.

So caught up in his own mind Verin misses your question directed at him until you nudge him and repeat it. As asked, he hands you the plate of roast allowing you to take a slice for yourself smiling in thanks and offer to plate him one too. It doesn’t go unnoticed to him, or anyone paying attention to your brief interaction for that matter, Verin is somewhat slow in his reply to take you up on your offer and the both of you return your attention to your food while you engage in the conversation among the table. Verin is somewhat aware of the subject of the conversation but pays too little attention to actively engage in it. He puts in his two copper at times just to pretend and pass through unnoticed but with the more perceptive ones in the group, not even his cocky confidence is enough to make him believe he’s succeeding.

“How have matters in Xhorhas been, Verin? They’re not giving you too much trouble, are they?” You ask keeping eye contact with the drow at your side as the conversation shifts, eyes on Verin awaiting his reply. Verin sets down his cutlery as you do, your meals finished and plates empty.

“Rather dull. The constant bickering politicians does little to calm one’s nerves. At least the fighting among troops and during training provided sufficient entertainment and distraction. Would it be wrong for me to say I prefer it to the halls of stone and thrones of pompous assholes?” Verin answers his eyes go across the company at the table gaging their responses as he’s grown accustomed to. His eyes stay on you longer than the others. He couldn’t help himself.

“Not at all.” You tell him with an understanding only you could embody.

“If you’re missing the fighting I’m sure our friend here would be happy to indulge you in some entertainment.” Beauregard looks over the edge of her wineglass as she takes a sip with a mischievous intent referring to you with a wave of her hand. The disapproving shake of the head from you silently telling her to cut it makes her shrug and roll her eyes.

“What? We’ve all seen it. You could cut this sexual tension with a knife-“ Beau slumps back in her seat as you slam your hand on the table with a glare leaning in and if looks could kill…

“That’s enough.” You demand with an authority that even the monk realises she may have gone too far. It’s exactly that commanding presence about you that has Verin admire you even more. You could charm the hearts of all you face or command them to your will in but a few words and a directed look in your eyes. Your expression softens as you turn to Verin and mutter an apology. Dinner continues and moves on as if the whole ordeal never happened yet Verin still feels the woman’s words burn within his chest. Was it really that obvious? Had he really done so terrible at hiding his affections for you? Or perhaps he had been the last to realise these affections? These questions swarm his mind for the rest of the evening until dinner is over.

It’s a habit to clean up together. Verin is not exempt from this. Each their own tasks Verin helps clearing the dirty plates, stack them and bring them to the kitchen where you’re washing them clean with Beauregard. You had insisted the monk join you and Verin can only assume you did so to keep her off his back and spare him the interrogation.

“-Come on, you just going to keep denying you want some of that hot drow ass?” Verin can practically hear you roll your eyes as the expositor nudges your shoulder taking the washed plate from you to dry it. When you don’t answer and after waiting a good few seconds Verin comes in and setting the stack of plates with the others before exiting again. He doesn’t return to the dining room but instead waits in the hallway near the kitchen out of sight but close enough to hear. He doesn’t know what made him think it is a good idea to eavesdrop, but he does.

“That is entirely inappropriate, Beau.” She snorts at your reply.

“That’s not an answer. Come on. He’s hot. You’re hot. You like him. He likes you.” You bite your tongue holding back a remark which only further encourages the woman who leans against the counter staring you down arms crossed. You’re not getting out of this one it seems to you let the plate sink into the soap water, dry your hands and mimic her position.

“Because, Beauregard, It can never happen.” The words are difficult to say out loud. As if speaking them makes them an undeniable truth. It’s a feeling both you and Verin can agree upon.

“Jeeze, I told you to fuck the guy. Not to marry him.” Beau jokes but quickly realises this is not the time to joke about these things. She mutters a genuine apology as you both turn back to work.

“Look, I know I’m not exactly an expert on feelings and shit but I don’t think it does either of you any good pretending there’s nothing going on between you two. Don’t come at me with the ‘it can’t happen’ bullshit because it can if you’re willing to put in the work and effort. At least talk it out, that’s what I’m saying. No need to both be miserable because you’re some kind of star-crossed lovers.” Beau dries the last plate and puts it on the stack carrying them back to the cabinet they belong in and leaves the kitchen. With a shake of your head you too clean up and leave. You need a drink and a strong one to deal with these conflicting feelings and thoughts.

By the time the others have retired, retreated or simply found entertainment through other means you’ve got the drawing room to yourself. Unceremoniously draped across one of the couches, glass of amber liquid filled beyond the appropriate amount held in your hand and bottle it came from on the low table you groan. Why, for once in your life can’t things just be easy? Why couldn’t you have fallen for some nice commoner with no affiliation to crown or country or the complications of politics and expectations? That's all you ask, just once, let it be easy.

‘It can never happen.’ The words have haunted Verin ever since they came from your lips. Maybe he shouldn’t have eavesdropped. That doesn’t make them any less true. It can never happen. No matter what petty affections he may hold for you or you for him, it can never happen. Your lives are not just your own and despite all you do to fight for your freedom, you’ll never be able to break those shackles without major consequences. Verin justifies not further indulging himself in his feelings of you with the ‘what if’s. What if it doesn’t work out? What if it falls apart? What if someone finds out? Why can things never be easy? Why couldn’t he just have fallen for some noble born from a respectable den like his mother would like him to have done? That’s all he asks, just for once, let it be easy.

Verin finds himself awake in his bed unable to sleep, plagued by these thoughts so instead he chooses to get up and go for a walk to ease his mind. Dressed, cloak draped across his shoulders he silently makes his way down the stairs. The house is quiet and he doesn’t want to wake anyone up but when he sees the faint ember glow from the drawing room his curiosity is peaked. Drawn to the room he eases closer and sees you sprawled out on a couch, eyes closed and glass dangling between your fingers. He assumes you’re asleep at first but when you steer, sit up and go to pour yourself another glass with a deep sigh he’s about to move back into the shadows and leave you to your night.

“I know you’re there. Lurking in the shadows is unbecoming of you.” There’s a hint of your smile in your voice that makes Verin’s lips curl up in response as he steps into the room. He sees you give him a once over and raise an eyebrow at his attire in silent question.

“I was going for a walk.” Verin explains. The look you give him makes him fear you know every thought going through his head.

“Seems like we’re both having a sleepless night. Unless you’d prefer to wander in the darkness of night on your own, you’re free to join me.” You say as you fill your glass again leaning back in the couch, making yourself comfortable. Verin hesitates so you hold your glass out to him.

“Don’t make me drink alone.” You give him a half smile and while he still hesitates, clear through his moment, Verin mentally hits himself for letting all his carefully built and practiced defences and composure crumble under your simply being there. He takes your glass and takes a sip, letting the harsh liquor’s familiar burn run down this throat. Maybe one drink won’t hurt. Verin hands you back your glass as you pull your legs aside and under you giving him space to sit down on the couch. He takes off his cloak and discards it over one of the nearby chairs in the room. Verin sits taking a glass from the tray on the table and filling it.

“To sleepless nights.” Verin toasts as you cling your glass with his.

“To sleepless nights.” You repeat as you enjoy your drink in comfortable silence allowing both of you to analyse the thoughts plaguing you. Neither of you get a single step further in your thought process and wether or not that is because the object of your inner turmoil is sitting right next to you or something else entirely, you’re not entirely sure.

“Will you be heading home again soon?” You ask leaning your cheek on your fist turning to face Verin. Home. He hadn’t thought of home outside of the context that you couldn’t be there with him. It doesn’t even feel like home anymore.

“I’m expected back in a few days.” He admits. “Why? Are you so keen to get rid of me already?” Verin jokes. Your laughter is stifled by the sip you just took and almost sends you in a coughing fit.

“If I was you would have known. But no, perhaps I’m just wondering if this will become even more of a habit than it already is.” You raise your glass making the liquid within swirl.

“I certainly don’t mind the company.” Verin states boldly. It’s not out of character for him to do so though he’d gotten more restrictive and watched his more open flirtations. This one slipped through, though he can’t find it within his heart to care it did when you tilt your head at him, a flirty smile gracing your lips as you bat your eyelashes and gasp.

“Verin! What would the people think?” It’s your turn to earn a laugh from him this time. Then the silence and unspoken words; it can never be, return.

“So how much did you hear?” You ask and Verin’s brow raises in confusion. “Don’t play dumb with me. I know you heard Beau and I in the kitchen. Some would consider eavesdropping rude.” You add the last part as a joke to alleviate some of the tension around your question.

“More than enough.” He admits. There’s no point in lying or dancing around the truth. You’re not the nobility of the Dynasty nor are you a soldier under his command he doesn’t need to explain himself to. You have every right to know the truth and he will tell it like it is. You’ve earned that much from him.

“At least we are on the same page.” Verin breathes. These words, they feel wrong to him so much it leaves him doubting them. This does not go over your head and you can’t help but feel the simmering embers of a hope for something that shouldn’t- no can’t be. Ever since Beau said what she did you’ve been questioning everything, your own feelings conflicted and by the looks of it Verin isn’t much different.

“Are we?” You question with a deep sigh, mimicked by the drow warrior.

“When did you realise?” Verin asks and you raise an eyebrow as if to say ‘you really expect me to answer that’ but the look he gives you is enough to say he does and you think. Ever since you were introduced you hadn’t been shy about the fact that he’s keen on the eyes. You’ve gushed about that with some of the others but all in fairness. It wasn’t love at first sight. Definitely not. A cocky attitude and relentless flirt and much less of socially constipated personality than his brother, the definition of tall, dark and handsome that has Jester swoon at secondhand romance that just never happened. But none of that is affection. Simply attraction. It doesn’t mean anything until someone acts upon it or it grows into something more. Has it grown into something more?

“A couple of months after our first meeting. When you started coming by more often and we got to know each other properly. I think it was when we went out for dinner together in that dingy back alley tavern. Those thugs were so rude. We taught them a good lesson.” You reminisce the fight that followed after some idiots made some rude comments looking for a fight. You gave them a fight and ended up running from the local guard. Perhaps not the best when you were quite literally dragging what some would consider an enemy of the crown through the streets by his hand.

“What about you? When did you realise you were completely and utterly in love with me?” You tease nudging Verin with your toes. He grabs your foot and yanks, pulling you from your seated position to instead lay flat on your back on the couch. You just barely managed to save your drink from spilling giving him a playful glare. This is exactly why you liked him so much, the dynamic between the two of you, playful and lighthearted. Around you it’s as if Verin has left all his responsibilities back in Rosohna and can just be himself.

“I wouldn’t want to inflate your ego. But if you must know, it was a rather recent revelation caused only by myself wilfully downplaying my own feelings.” You raise your glass in agreement and stretch out your legs across Verin’s lap, pulling a pillow from where you were previously seated and place it beneath your head.

“That’s not an answer to my question, Verin. Won’t you indulge me with a real answer or will you keep dancing around the truth to save yourself the embarrassment?” You continue your teasing.

“You sound like my brother.” Verin retorts taking your drink from you. You try to scramble to your knees to make up for the height difference but an arm holds your legs firmly where they are. Still you sit up reaching for the fine amber liquid. Your attempts are futile still. Plan B. You arch your legs, pushing your heels into the cushioning of the couch and leverage your heels against the outer side of Verin’s thigh, lean yourself over his arm holding your legs and instead reach for the glass in his hand leaning over the arm of the couch. He’s quick but you’re quicker and through his surprise you manage to take his drink from him, holding it out of his reach. He goes for it but the hand firmly pressed against his chest keeps him from doing so and you smirk.

“Come on, I answered you. It’s only fair you do the same.” You push playfully. Verin knows well enough you’d take no for an answer if he gave it but he finds himself willing to speak.

“If it means you’ll give me back my drink. It’s moments like these. Looking back it made me realise I don’t have this luxury with anyone else, the closest I get is with your friends but whenever we’re together there’s just something so uniquely you that gives me a sense of belonging I have not experienced in a long time. That’s what made me realise my affections run deeper than a simple attraction.” Verin’s confession brings a genuine warmth to your face and you, as promised hold his glass out for him as he returns yours. Neither of you take it yet.

“There there, was that so hard to say?” With that instead of handing you your drink, Verin brings your glass to his lips and downs the contents in one big gulp. In revenge you go to do the same but Verin grabs the glass and holds it beyond your grasp again. He’s forced to let go his grip on your legs so you swing around and reach over him to get to it. Your legs on either side of his you raise to your knees and this time you manage to grab your glass quickly taking it and draining the contents. With a grin of victory your flick his chin up.

“Ha! I win.” You cup Verin’s face as his fingers wrap around your wrists. He doesn’t remove your hands nor does he move to shift your current position, unbothered by the closeness.

“I’d call that a draw.” He argues but you don’t feel like relenting.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night.” You let your hands drop but his hold onto your wrists remains, a light caress running over your palms. The touch is so affectionate neither you nor Verin really know what to do with it. Neither of you do anything to stop it either and instead live in the moment.

“Maybe Beauregard is right…” Verin breathes and you snort.

“Don’t let her hear you say it.” You still agree with Verin, allowing your mind to wander in this brief moment of affection between just the two of you. You’ve both been holding back despite your feelings being the same for the sake of the politics neither of you wanted to let rule your lives. They have and still do. Maybe it’s time to break the circle.

“What’s the worst that could happen?” You ask and doomsday scenarios play through your respective minds you find it within yourselves to brush them away. Those are problems for another day. You’ve been living in fear of a future that hasn’t even happened and lost sight of the present.

“So many things.” Verin laughs as his hand moves to cup your cheek, feeling the muscle move beneath his fingertips as you return a chuckle of your own. “May I kiss you?”

“I’d be disappointed if you didn’t.” Verin shakes his head before he leans in and closes the distance taking what you willingly give. It’s not a kiss of Jester’s countless romance novels and smut books but it is filled with affection and passion no less. Deprived of this previously by your own choices to hold off, you fully indulge now. You’ll worry about the aftermath another time. For now you’ll stop being star-crossed lovers and instead just be. Be yourselves. Be happy. Be in love.