#TYPES OF CUT OF MEAT
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GASTRONOMIA: LAS CARNES
GASTRONOMY: MEATS Las carnes en la cocina han sido y seguirán siendo fundamentales, e independientemente de sus tipos. Son protagonistas de grandes propuestas culinarias al más alto nivel por tanto una condición indispensable de la cocina es conocerla, respetarla y ensalzarla. Es decir, saber elaborarla sin desvirtuar su exquisitez, y sus propiedades saludables. De hecho hoy por hoy grandes…
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#BEEF CUTTING CLASSES#CATEGORIES#COCINA#COOKING POINTS#COOKING TIPS#EXPERT RECOMMENDATIONS#GASTRONOMIA#GASTRONOMIC PLANET#HAY MUCHOS CORTES SEGUN LA CATEGORIA A LA QUE PERTENEZCA LA PIEZA DE CARNE#HAY MUCHOS MAS CORTES SEGUN EL ANIMAL#HAY MUCHOS MAS CORTES SEGUN EL PAIS#LAMB CUTS#LAS CARNES#lomasleido#MEAT PRESERVATION#NUTRICION#PORK CUTS#TIPOS DE CARNES#TIPOS DE CORTES DE CARNES#TYPES OF CUT OF MEAT#XPLORALYA
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More misc. daily life pictures and such
#image commentary in tags once again since they don't allow captions anymore and I feel weird using the alt text for that --#1 & 2 - Very bright pretty looking sky !#2. HUGE icicle that looked like you could kill someone with it or something.. Pulled from near a gutter on the side of a building#3. & 4 & 5 - various images from a silly party I had where I pretended to be some elf king turning like 204 years old lol (also not like#a REAL party. Only my roommates were there really and we're all in the same household bubble.#just to clarify. I would never dare have a large party anyway given#my hermitous nature but on top of that.. didn't want there to be some implication that I'm having a Party while covid is still ongoing lol.#NEVER.. But I do love dressing up as some fantasy character so much.. The only thing that could ever bring a true hermit wizard#to engage with others socially is the prospect of connecting it somehow to fantasy worlds and costumes lol. One must simply dress up#as a silly 200 year old man from time to time and pretend you've never seen a balloon before in your life. etc.#6. bapy boye... feets#7. The main food that I made for the elderly elf man 'party'. which was a Deconstructed Beef Wellington (kind of as ajoke since I watch s#o many silly cooking competition shows and they always make stuff 'deconstructed' at the last minute when under time limits or whatever.)#I've wanted to make beef wellington a few times but Ithink to do it well I'd need like..an actual kitchen and a lot of time and#an oven that fully works to bake things and etc. etc. So I thought this would be an easier method. A thick steak cut round to kind of mimi#c the round tenderloin or whatever it is in a wellington. instead of the puff pastry being wrapped around - I just did star shaped cut outs#of pastry and baked them and put them on top (to go with the star theme). instead of mushroom duxelles being wrapped around in pastry#its in a little circle under the steak. and instead of mustard being brushed onto the meat I made a mustard gravy sauce type of thing#Then of course asparagus on the side.. my favorite... Though I know some wellington#also has a layer of prosciutto I think. or I saw one person use crepes. I didn't feel it was necessary to incorporate that too lol#8. bapy son helping me do a giant puzzle that took me hours and I had no idea it was actually that large of a puzzle#until I started putting it together and for some reason it made me stressed by the end instead of relaxed lol.. puzzle fatigue#photo diary
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attack for @musimoni
#artfight#gore#durge#team stardust#my search history: worms. wigglign worm. worm in dirt#flesh. meat. meat closup. marblign meat#knife. knives. vintage knife. scary knife. bloody knife.#arms. half of arm. human arm cut off. mannequin arm. fake plastic arm.#and then like ten thousand different types of animal hearts bc the search engines are cowards#>mine_>art
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I'm sharing a traditional soup recipe with a friend so i figured I might as well make it into a post. Polish mutuals and non mutuals alike please weigh in.
I'll be describing how to make Rosół sometimes localized as golden soup. It holds for about 3 days without freezing. As a little bonus I'll also add in some dishes that use rosół as a base; mostly mentions tho as to not balloon the post. Rosół is a savory meat based broth like soup usually eaten with noodles, it is similar in composition to ramen but places less stress on additions and plating.
Prep time: 10-20 minutes (with great room to spare)
Cooking time: >4h (generally the longer the better)
You'll need: A rather large pot, a strainer (any size, optional), a source of continuous flame (either a gas stove or a candle tea heater both work well, a blowtorch or kitchen torch works in a pinch but I don't recommend it, don't bother with a lighter; it's not worth it, also optional but VERY strongly encouraged)
[recipe under the read more]
Rosół is cooked differently in each household; sometimes according to tradition but usually to taste so the ingredients I'm about to give are tentative and should be adjusted
Ingredients:
about 3lbs Meat
1 Onion (charred)
1 or 2 Parsley roots
1 Carrot
1 Celeriac / Celery Root (large)
1/2 a Leek or as much as will fit in the pot
1 bundle of Fresh Parsley
2-4 Celeriac Stems (optional)
12 whole grains of Peppercorn
1 whole grain of Allspice
1/2 a Bay Leaf
A lot of how the end result will taste depends on the meat used in cooking, that includes both animal and cuts. Traditionally rosół is made with beef cuts such as the shank (or flank) and brisket (you're looking for chewy cuts and ones with some fat on them, tho usually the cheaper the meat is, the better it will do) (as an aside, traditionally when an old dairy cow would die it's meat would be used for rosół among other things, so don't be concerned about the general quality and age of the meat you're using) and poultry wings (including wing tips) and necks such as chicken, duck, or goose. Something more controversial nowadays but still very traditional would be horse tail and horse meat, both it and oxtail is a really good choice if you can get them cheaply.
Beef adds a little bit of sourness to the broth so it should be balanced by either adding in a little bit more carrot or about 1/3 of it's weight in turkey. I'd advise against using only turkey as it makes the broth too sweet in my experience, but it remains a great addition for balancing. The gamyer the meat the more intense in flavor and light in feel the broth will be, so for special occasions getting a goose or duck can make for an amazing dish.
Preparation:
Peel and wash all the vegetables thoroughly, make sure to get the dirt from in between the leek leafs (I usually use a high pressure shower head but I'm sure a sink is sufficient), and to get all the nooks and crevices of the celeriac (tho don't cut off the knotted part it's not imperative you keep it but it is a bit wasteful to do so)
chop the root vegetables into thumb sized dice, this includes; the parsley roots, the celeriac, and the carrot. Do Not chop the onion.
Char the peeled onion! Set it onto a source of open flame so that it is touching the onion directly but is not engulfing the onion and wait about a minute or 5, then turn the onion over and repeat the process. Do not try to scrape off the char, it's supposed to stay. (skip this step if you don't have an open flame handy)
Tie the parsley into a knot so it will stay together while cooking.
Cooking:
Put all the meat into the largest pot you can muster, anything you could fit your head in (or maybe even a bit smaller) will work, and pour water into it so that it covers the raw meat completely. Add the peppercorns, allspice, bay, and the onion. Put the pot on high heat and bring it up to almost a gentle boil before cutting the heat completely. If you want to, you can strain the broth to get rid of the meat fuss, keeping all the spices and the onion, or just let the fuss settle to the bottom of the pot. I've also seen people use a smaller strainer to skim the fuss off the top. Put the pot on low heat and watch if it tries to boil, if it does, add a table spoon of cold water to quiet it down and lower the temperature, ideally your soup should be moving but not quite boiling, do not stir as it'll only damage the onion and redisperse the fuss. If at any point the onion begins to disintegrate simply pull it out so it doesn't make the soup cloudy, you can eat it as is or add it back later and have it with the soup. After at least an hour, or after the meat can be pierced with a meat fork, start putting in other ingredients in order of cook time: first the Parsley root, then the carrot, then the celeriac, the leek should get added at the very end with all the herbs (parsley and celeriac stems). I like to wait an hour between each ingredient but not everyone has 6 hours to make soup, even if you don't have to watch it, so ration your time accordingly. The soup is ready when the leak is cooked through or about half an hour to an hour after putting it in.
Plating and further processing:
Rosół is generally eaten with noodles, any size and shape will do but short thin strands are the most common. You can eat it as a 2 course meal with the broth and noodles as soup and the less chewy meat from it as the second course, my favorite way to eat it is with horseradish sauce made with the broth for which I will provide a recipe later!
Rosół is also a base for many different dishes. You can use the broth as a base for other soups like żurek, and the tougher, stringyer peaces of meat can be ground into pierogi filling, but one of the simplest ways to enhance another dish with it is using it in a horseradish sauce recipe:
ingredients: a table spoon of unsalted butter, a teaspoon of flour, 2 table spoons of rosół (substitutable with any kind of broth), horseradish paste (I use jarred, if you plan on grinding the horseradish yourself add a little bit of cream)
Into a very small pot on low to medium heat add the butter and melt it. Before it burns add the teaspoon of flour and wait for it to brown slightly, stir constantly to make sure it doesn't burn. Quench the rue with the broth, it should foam slightly so try not to spill any, and after it deflates a bit add the horseradish paste to taste. I tend to go for 2 table spoons (quite spicy) but make sure to make the sauce as spicy as you want it to be, the more horseradish the spicier it'll be.
Pour your sauce onto one of the tender peaces of meat extracted from your rosól and enjoy. This seemingly simple dish always fills me with great glee and a sense of accomplishment. There's nothing quite like a peace of meat with horseradish sauce, both a result of delicious soup.
#kuchnia#recipe#polblr#me posting#I'm bad at actual tags and this is me trying#I had so much more to say but I'm exhausted after writing all that#should probably keep it in drafts for 24 to look over for mistakes tomorrow but I just want to get it out there#I may or may not do an addition where I go over each ingredient and how they taste/ what they do for the soup#to make substituting easier for those that still wanna try it but can't get all the stuff#and also going over each meat type and cut that can go into rosół and what to do with it/ what soup you can expect#there is a lot to talk about when it comes to rosół#soup in general really#anyway; finch this is your fault
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FUCKED UPPPP that we havnt heard Shit nor Fuck about the convergence reboot. WHERE IS FERGUS!!!!! I WANT FERGUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#OUHHH CONVEGENCEEEE i remember that was my first time realizing WOW slimecicy is RLLY GOOD AT PLAYING OUT THE HORROR#that ssscene that SCENE w alastyr getting infected w the funny meat thing and kasper trying to dig it out of his arm MMMM YUMMMMYYYY YUMMY#first time seeing bizl play a Sweet Baby Boyy type character also. GREAT STUFF!! i love it when a little guy gets hhurt really really bad#i love it when a dude is short and a little pathetic and passes out from the pain ofhhis arm getting cut open#that scene altered smth in me. i gotta redraw that scene sometime....or atleast relisten to it#i wish i wsa fergus. who said that. what does that even mean#i wouldve also mentioned how much i miss Strangle Macock but i DONT bc hes real and im with him and we travel together n we're besties
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thinking again
#feel like i have become too complacent with watering myself down into an easily digestible identify for society#partially bc of my career is very conservative.. so#no piercings or tattoos. cut my long hair off to a mens hairstyle. i pass exclusively as a cis straight man as much as i can#especially around the old head bosses i meat#stopped learning japanese even though im mixed so i could learn French because its more useful where i live#i dont want to be useful and i dont want to be seen as some creature mimicking human anatomy like a robot i just want 2 be myself#but ive been doing this so long idk who myself would even be anymore#sometimes i get into old interests i had as a kid and i feel that spark like that 12 yr old didnt die on the inside but then its gone again#i wish a version of myself thats not palatable to my peers could exist#i want to relearn japanese and i want to ride motorcycles and i want to get into certain types of music or clothes#but it also feels like none of it really matters anymore at the same time#if i could be anything i would be a funeral director in nagoya but thats something that can never happen#i shove everything i like down so deep you have to reach to find it#this whole blog is an amalgamation of who i was and who i wished i could be#but being human we r just cursed with bodies that dont feel like our own and having to cut and shape them in a way#that u feel better but not enough so that the people around you are frightened#this is mostly the fact i have avoidant personality disorder and i know i can never be what normal is for most people#i want 2 be myself but myself died somewhere in a past life i think#i am not even human on the inside. half the time i joke w people that im an rpg slime or the human version of those sponge slimes#hence my nickname irl literally being gelo / jello / jelly#and if not that then black German shepherd dogs r also literally just me#but alas i am stuck in a human body#one thats too fat too hairy too sick too broken and i have to deal with it and rebuild myself everyday so people aren't uncomfortable#ANYWAY!!! maybe ill add onto this later ...idk.#to be born again.. sighs.
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@unladielike from here
Hearing that he gave Vivian dog person vibes made sense, but was a bit of a shock. How could she tell he was canine-inclined? Was it something he said or did? Even after living in the human world for a while, it was still difficult to mask the fact that he wasn't human. Had she picked up on it? Maybe he had forgotten to remove the wolf fur that shed on his uniform one morning.
"Oh...? That's funny. Well, you're not wrong," he shrugged, trying to keep himself from seeming too suspicious. More than anything, he was glad to have a change of subject when he went to grab the book. He wasn't exactly the best liar.
Whatever worries he had were quickly erased by Vivian's genuine happiness when he handed her the book. Someone like her couldn't possibly be a threat to him or his pack, right? Hiro was easily caught up in the joyous moment and smiled along with her. "No problem! I'm glad it didn't take too long to come in. Sometimes those manga venders take a while."
But what really excited him about their interaction was the offer to join her for dorayaki. As always, anything food related piqued his interest. "Of course, I'd love to!" He beamed back at her, scrambling to pull up the employee hours on his phone. "Hmm, looks like I'm off in about an hour an a half. I know that's a long time, but you're welcome to browse or read whatever you'd like while you wait! Is that okay?"
#unladielike#hiro;;threads—{my blood type is loyalty.}#//just creating a new post for this to cut out the ask#//my boy will ALWAYS go if it has something to do with food#//he looooves human cuisine#//much better than eating raw meat all the time :')
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Me: You don't need to do this much stuff for the party. It's just you and a couple friends.
Also me: GO BIG OR FUCK OFF, SELF.
#geeky talks#is two types of bread and 8 types of cracks and 5 different meats and 6 different cheeses that had to be cut by hand and homemade rolls#and fruit “salsa” with cinnamon pita chips and deviled eggs and marinated olvies and fancy butter and homemade fruit preserves#and a veggie platter and homemade sangria and cocktails and jello poke cake#is that too much?#(tumblr would say it as i had to split my list into three parts#because apparently you can only say so much in a tag before it makes you start a new one)#so anyway most of that is what i did today
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i think the ideal food is something i can make a big pot of and then eat out of whatever size bowl i want
#teaposts#which actually has more to do with me realizing why i have a bit of an aversion to making 'hunk of meat' type meals#if i'm staring down e.g. a chicken breast there's a silent expectation that i should be hungry enough to finish all of it#plus whatever side dishes i've prepared bc i like to have well balanced meals#and sometimes i'm just not that hungry. or sometimes i'm not consistently hungry enough to do that 4-6 times in a row#so even if i think it tastes good there's a stronger chance more food will go to waste#(like the other week when i had that lemon pepper chicken. i felt bad bc it was so good but i wasted like half of what i prepared)#whereas if i have e.g. a soup or stir fry i can decide exactly how much i want and that makes it easier to go back to during the week#also i don't really need elaborate side dishes bc those things usually have veggies proteins grains etc. all in the same bowl#so it occurred to me that it might help if i either start with cutting meats in bite-size pieces or chop them up after cooking#and give myself more freedom for the 'whatever bowl i want' criterion
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i hate that 8 frogs in total have been killed just bc my class could get the difference between central and peripheral nervous system. my friends say we're doing this in the name of science or whatever but girl... we know the results already, do we have to torture a poor animal to prove the basics again and again
#and this will happen every year in every faculty in every city of the world where there are people who study med.#i'm not denying the fact that our knowledge of biology has advanced majorly by the decease of millions of lives (be it human frog rat etc.)#be it post-mortum with consent or just downright unethical experiments. isn't it speciesism when you can casually cut a frog open and#not feel anything while doing the same to a cat or a dog would enrage and sadden us#and isn't it hypocritical when i type all this after having meat in dinner
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I will write this thought about Veganism and Classism in the USA in another post so as to not derail the other thread:
There are comments in the notes that say meat is only cheaper than plant based foods because of subsidies artificially lowering the price of meat in the United States. This is...part of the story but not all of it.
For my animal agriculture lab we went to a butcher shop and watched the butcher cut up a pig into various cuts of meat. I have had to study quite a bit about the meat industry in that class. This has been the first time I fully realized how strongly the meat on a single animal is divided up by socioeconomic class.
Like yes, meat cumulatively takes more natural resources to create and thus should be more expensive, but once that animal is cut apart, it is divided up between rich and poor based on how good to eat the parts are. I was really shocked at watching this process and seeing just how clean and crisp an indicator of class this is.
Specifically, the types of meat I'm most familiar with are traditionally "waste" parts left over once the desirable parts are gone. For example, beef brisket is the dangly, floppy bit on the front of a cow's neck. Pork spareribs are the part of the ribcage that's barely got anything on it.
And that stuff is a tier above the "meat" that is most of what poor people eat: sausage, hot dogs, bologna, other heavily processed meat products that are essentially made up of all the scraps from the carcass that can't go into the "cuts" of meat. Where my mom comes from in North Carolina, you can buy "livermush" which is a processed meat product made up of a mixture of liver and a bunch of random body parts ground up and congealed together. There's also "head cheese" (made of parts of the pig's head) and pickled pigs' feet and chitlin's (that's made of intestines iirc) and cracklin's (basically crispy fried pig skin) and probably a bunch of stuff i'm forgetting. A lot of traditional Southern cooking uses basically scraps of animal ingredients to stretch across multiple meals, like putting pork fat in beans or saving bacon grease for gravy or the like.
So another dysfunctional thing about our food system, is that instead of people of each socioeconomic class eating a certain number of animals, every individual animal is basically divided up along class lines, with the poorest people eating the scraps no one else will eat (oftentimes heavily processed in a way that makes it incredibly unhealthy).
Even the 70% lean ground beef is made by injecting extra leftover fat back into the ground-up meat because the extra fat is undesirable on the "better" cuts. (Gross!)
I've made, or eaten, many a recipe where the only thing that makes it non-vegan is the chicken broth. Chicken broth, just leftover chicken bones and cartilage rendered and boiled down in water? How much is that "driving demand" for meat, when it's basically a byproduct?
That class really made me twist my brain around about the idea of abstaining from animal products as a way to deprive the industry of profits. Nobody eats "X number of cows, pigs, chickens in a lifetime" because depending on the socioeconomic class, they're eating different parts of the animal, splitting it with someone richer or poorer than they are. If a bunch of people who only ate processed meats anyway abstained, that wouldn't equal "saving" X number of animals, it would just mean the scraps and byproducts from a bunch of people's steaks or pork chops would have something different happen to them.
The other major relevant conclusion I got from that class, was that animal agriculture is so dominant because of monoculture. People think it's animal agriculture vs. plant agriculture (or plants used for human consumption vs. using them to feed livestock), but from capitalism's point of view, feeding animals corn is just another way to use corn to generate profits.
People think we could feed the world by using the grain fed to animals to feed humans, but...the grain fed to animals, is not actually a viable diet for the human population, because it's literally just corn and soybean. Like animal agriculture is used to give some semblance of variety to the consumer's diet in a system that is almost totally dominated by like 3 monocrops.
Do y'all have any idea how much of the American diet is just corn?!?! Corn starch, corn syrup, corn this, corn that, processed into the appearance of variety. And chickens and pigs are just another way to process corn. That's basically why we have them, because they can eat our corn. It's a total disaster.
And it's even worse because almost all the USA's plant foods that aren't the giant industrial monocrops maintained by pesticides and machines, are harvested and cared for by undocumented migrant workers that get abused and mistreated and can't say anything because their boss will tattle on them to ICE.
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You know, at this point I'm highly skeptical of things where people have a single simple solution to large scale problems that just calls for doing exactly what they think needs to be done and then everything is fixed
#today this is about a graph I just saw showing how we'd barely have to use any land compared to what we use now#if we just all went vegan#not only would less land be used for grazing; but it would also take less land to grow all the food we need to eat than we're using now#(which now that I say that I realize that seems extra nutty)#ok... so here's the problem... when you present me that good of a solution with that kind of margins...#well I really start to doubt someone isn't fudging some numbers somewhere or making gross assumptions#and not to pull a whataboutism with this but like... for real... what about the people who physically can't eat a vegan diet?#and then the practical question of cool; you're magically right... how do we get this adopted?#and what about food prices; people can swear up and down all day it's cheaper to eat health vegan food#but I have trouble keeping the pantry stocked even with meat; and I find I need to eat more with vegetarian stuff#and I'll be blunt; I point blank refuse to go vegan cause while I could maybe cut out meat#we're not even talking me being sad or something; I straight up couldn't get enough to eat without eggs and dairy#and keep in mind; I pretty much never do fast food or anything; it's more or less all made from ingredients at home#so like... magic of your chart aside where I find it's suspect#do you have a plan to subsidize food prices so I can afford to eat vegetarian?#do you have plans in place for how to look after people who physically can't go vegan?#or do you just have a fuzzy feeling about making this happen and therefore it'll just work if we'd only do it#(I'll say it again; you want to stop animals from being slaughtered to be eaten; develop high quality lab grown meat)#(cause surely the problem with people eating meat is the land use and that something has to die)#(surely you're not just being smug about a type of food being morally wrong even if all suffering could be removed from it)#(and I will switch to lab grown meat in an instant if it's price competitive and... 80% as good as good quality meat is)#anyway... this is just one example; there's a lot of stuff where it's like...#you take a simplistic view of the world and say 'just conform to my ideals already'#but you refuse to address any of the root underlying causes while representing your position as the only morally right one#sorry; we live in the real world which often means complex systems are at work#and you can be as right as you want; it won't make things better unless you actually address the causes of why things are how they are#unless you address why people do stuff like eat meat (hungry)#and unless you acknowledge stuff like that US vegans have in the past outbid people in other countries for their staple crops#cause they wanted to feel good about it; but now it means these people are becoming food insecure#or shit like how agave is being over harvested cause people don't want to eat honey despite the bees being fine...
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Choking Safety
I've been seeing some kind of scare-mongering type posts going around about choking during sex, so I wanted to address how to approach choking in a safe way. Choking is not a 0 risk activity, but it is also not so dangerous that you will just randomly die either. Anyone who does martial arts will confirm that thousands of teenagers are being successfully trained to choke each other safely (for self defense) every day! There's no reason you can't learn to do it too.
First you should be familiar with some basic anatomy of the neck and throat:
The carotid veins on both sides of the neck and the trachea/windpipe in the center are the most important things to be aware of. If you want to enjoy the psychological element of having someone's hands around your neck with relatively little risk, you can do "choking" play that avoids putting any pressure on those arteries or the trachea. As with all choking play, safety is highest when both parties are fully sober. I'm not actually sure if there are people out there who are into having the windpipe or trachea blocked. This tends to hurt like fuck and cause an autonomic choking response. You'll know if you went too far center because generally the bottom will be like "WTH". I don't know if there is a way to do this play safely or not as I don't have experience with it. It probably carries some risk of the trachea collapsing which would be a hospital trip for sure. Most choking play is done with the intention of cutting off the blood supply to the brain by applying pressure to both the left and right carotid arteries. This type of choking is not really "breath play" because of the way it works (though many people refer to it that way.) This creates a pleasant light headed feeling, but is also where the higher risk comes in. It often doesn't take long for a person to lose consciousness once these arteries are blocked, often less than 10 seconds. Sometimes getting completely choked out is the goal, sometimes not. Either way, the top has to pay very very careful attention to every aspect of their bottom's body language. Once you realize that a person has lost consciousness, the choking must stop immediately. Because of this: the most dangerous way to do this kind of play is alone. (hence all the auto-erotic asphyxiation deaths you hear about) It goes without saying that intoxication also dramatically increases the risks. It's not recommended to lose consciousness this way on a regular basis. It's just not good for your brain to repeatedly go through, especially in rapid succession. Generally, the more time spaced out between this type of play: the better. Though some people may have medical conditions that make the risk higher, as long as you stop choking when you reach the desired headspace, this play is approachable. Anyone who's REALLY into the idea but feels unsure or scared, I highly recommend taking a few martial arts classes. MMA guys do this to each other all the time! For sports! The key is just stopping at the right time. There are two main ways to go about blocking the carotid arteries. The main one used in martial arts and self defense is the rear naked choke.
This type of choke is incredible effective at choking someone out quickly and easily. The forearm and the bicep are squeezing each artery until the desired effect is achieved. The risk here is how quickly it works in combination with not being able to have a visual on your bottom's facial response. When someone loses consciousness they will go limp and begin twitching somewhat. This is normal, and you should stop immediately if you notice those signs. The more common method of choking play during sex is what looks more like typical choking. Facing your partner, using both hands.
You want to find the arteries with both hands, and use the meat at the base of your thumbs to apply gradually increasing pressure upwards towards your partner's head. You can keep the thumbs tucked to avoid accidental pressure on the windpipe. (Though this is not required so long as you remember not to apply pressure to the windpipe.) This type of play has a few safety benefits. First, you can see your partner's face so it's more obvious when you can see they've hit a headspace that is desirable. Additionally, it's just a little more difficult to find the arteries and push up on them correctly. If your goal is to get a little light headed without losing consciousness, this is more easily accomplished with this type of choke. However, losing consciousness is still a risk and both partners being fully alert will ensure the lowest risk environment. I know choking play is incredibly popular, even 'vanilla' people participate in this type of play on a regular basis without really knowing the technical details. Most of them don't get seriously hurt...but knowing what you're actually doing with risky play is a base component of risk aware consensual kink. Anyway I hope people find this helpful! Happy choking!!
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SpaceDancer's request for parasitic roses and Camille Alexander's request for unicorn fops created Angelique.
i now present my newest Charming Little Freak ✨
Angelique is one of those beings that isn't cleanly classified as a fae or a demon. he/it/whatever (roses are perfect plants and so it mostly goes by the pronouns common for the additional sex of his host body in human society because they couldn't care less) is a Rampant. a type of sapient parasitic rose that, over time, transforms the body of their host from a simple quadruped beast to bipedal humanoid (kinda) monster. every Rampant seems to mold themselves into unique forms, and designs often carry over if they somehow manage to get "uprooted" without dying and have to start over with a new flesh body. if Rampants stay rooted then they're borderline immortal even though their hosts are...dead? it's unclear. the Rampant certainly carries memories of what it was like being an animal and their flesh and blood is altered, but alive. the body keeps the score whether they like it or not. but the beast itself, its mind, dies quickly after a Rampant takes root. either from the trauma from becoming a Flowerbed or from the Rampant purposefully putting a thorn through its brain. whether fae or demon, Rampants take. they do not possess. they do not imprison.
Angelique currently lives in a small dying village, spending his time checking in on the aging population as a kind of town housemaid/caretaker and tending to his flower shop/apothecary. most people would say that having a creature like him around isn't a great idea, but this eldritch horror has basically been adopted by every lonely old person in town so good luck getting rid of him.
Fun Facts:
he loves nice soft clothes, meat (blood sausage is his favorite), and (in spite of his goth everything all the time) sunlight.
buzzing sounds make him flustered while prolonged exposure to cut grass smells and cold weather make him anxious.
he's an scary good climber and will forgo a door if he knows someone is on a higher floor of a building and he sees an open window.
always well hydrated. carries around a flask of water at all times and likes to sit outside naked when it rains.
he has many little leafy assistants which are also just him. he's like an octopus. the people in the community assign them all little names and give them unique decorations and he thinks it's really cute.
what is he getting out of staying in this village? none of your business.
he's currently in a weird situationship with 2 local gravekeepers from rival graveyards/religions and the recently widowed agnostic town doctor. everyone in this polycule hates everyone else but him. he's also friends with benefits with my character Brooke, who finds all of this hilarious and is eager to hear about the latest disaster every time he passes through town.
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In the spirit of Dungeon Meshi I think that Muppets could be considered a type of monster in the dungeon and that Laios would absolutely try to eat felt stuffing and fabric. And it would taste horrible UNTIL they cut inside it deep enough past the felt to reach the puppeteer meat which I feel should look enough like a human hand to fuck with them but enough like a monster that they're like sure. why not.
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Slowpoke Tails - Shed vs Chopped
Okay, so there's something of a discrepancy between how Slowpoke tails are treated by the Pokémon franchise. Initially, it was understood that these are a tasty, unethical luxury item, starting in Gold/Silver/Crystal and mirrored in Heartgold/Soulsilver:
The whole plot here is that Team Rocket has taken the Slowpoke in the Azalea Slowpoke Well and chopped their tails off to sell on the black market. These run for a whopping 1,000,000 PD a pop ($10k in USD).
But then, in later generations, it's said that Slowpoke tails fall off naturally. In fact, they're a crucial part of both Alolan AND Galarian cuisine:
The curry ingredient even sells for a measly 2,200 PD ($22 USD).
So what gives? Why is it a Million-Poké black market item when you can get a package off your local hiker?
Easy. Sweetness.
Slowpoke use their tails to fish for food. Typically, they do this by dipping their tails into the water, then letting the current catch the sweet sap they give off and bring it to hungry Water-types.
When a Slowpoke sheds its tail, it's because the tail's ability to generate sap has dried up. It's no longer useful as fishing bait, so the Slowpoke has to either get rid of the tail, or starve.
Shed Slowpoke tails, the ones commonly available for cooking, aren't sweet in the slightest—they're more like heavily-marbled tuna steaks, somewhere between beef and fish with a lot of fat dripping from them, and a rich umami flavor.
Chopped Slowpoke tails, the kind you find on the black market, are a completely different experience. The meat is more tender, the flavor a lot more delicate, with a sweetness permeating it that's a lot like the honey glaze on a ham.
Naturally, chopped Slowpoke tail then becomes a novel experience. Because you have to take it from a Slowpoke, you can't just find it lying around.
So why, then, is it illegal enough for Rocket to move in on? Why is Slowpoke farming or hunting for those sweet tails not a thing? They still grow them back afterwards, so what's the deal?
The problem with chopping a Slowpoke's tail off is that, even though it regenerates, its body wasn't ready to do so. This can cause a whole lot of complications for the poor thing.
A tail doesn't regenerate from nothing, for starters: every time you cut a tail off unexpectedly, the Slowpoke's body rushes to make a replacement, using up its body's fat reserves. This causes VERY rapid and dangerous weight loss, and a frankly ridiculous amount of stress.
Incorrect cuts can cause deformities, like a tail growing back too short, not being able to make enough sweetness to bait fish Pokémon, or even Espeon-tail syndrome, where the tail splits into two at the end.
And, perhaps most egregiously of all, a cut too high might mean the Slowpoke never regrows its tail at all. If you cut into anything that's not specifically tail tissue, the body will begin the scarring process over the wound, removing the Pokémon's ability to fish and evolve. And while it can learn to survive by fishing manually, like its evolutionary counterpart is required to, oftentimes, Slowpoke will just sit by the water and starve, not realizing that they aren't getting a bite because there's just nothing to bite.
In short: Shed = ethical, chopped = unethical, possibly lethal.
Slowpoke responsibly, guys.
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