#THIS ONE IS I T GUYS GALS AND NONBINARY PALS

[seaofashes]

Me, seeing an absolute unit of a videogame character that could snap my spine in half no problem: He's so babygirl

[lume-nosity]

boo! lume jumpscare coming to your feed because i finally found the time (and memory) to visit here. I MISSED YOU GUYS AAAAAGH i mean um hi or whatever,, what did i miss? how’s everyone? it’s been a hot minute.

[thatseventiesbitch]

It's heeeeeeere!

That '90s Show Season 2 Official Trailer

My favorite bits:

Leia's grandparents all teaching her to drive 🥰

I know a little bit about how Jay and Nikki find out about the almost-kiss, and it was fun seeing it play out 😆

Guys, gals and nonbinary pals, we have our first falling(/jumping?) off the water tower moment of the series!

"Okay you know what, I've talked myself back into it". Nikki my love!

Leia's Hot Topic interview!!!!! With Mitch. Who is still in love with Donna. 🙄 Very excited to see the rest of that storyline.

Lol why are the guys car-surfing? First it was Nate in the teaser and now Ozzie.

"If we got past me calling her grandma hot, we can make it through anything." 🤣

Ooooh, the girls shoplifting and Gwen being the only one they stop is inch-resting! Very very intrigued by how they handle this storyline. Reminds me of the Ginny & Georgia episode.

Why is Jay like, hugging Donna like that? (And the "Dude!" just sounded like LP to me 🤣)

I do love me some Will Forte

"We have some fun news to share!" LMAO that entire scene already had me dying. This Bob is back, baby!

T-minus 23 days, people. It's happening (again)!

[animentality]

Oh my GOD, the drama that's going on at my work...

So as some of you know, I've been getting bullied by my boss, let's call her Margaret because she's like Margaret Thatcher.

A Grade A bitch.

So Margaret will give me instructions that are wildly unclear, contradictory, or vague.

I'll give you an example.

We have a project that's basically comparing policy guidance from across different federal agencies with our own, so that we can incorporate their best language into our department's policy documents.

I wrote up a word document with policy analyses for all of our chosen examples.

Margaret said, I don't like this. I can't use it. I can't read it. Change it to Microsoft excel and make it like a checklist.

So I'm like alright, makes sense, my bad.

I do that.

She then complains that it's too much like a checklist and what she wanted was a detailed analysis that she could use.

Also that she can't read excel spreadsheets because there are..."too many words."

...

So. Yeah. Too many words, huh?

So I'm like...ok...but I already did that.

And she says, no you didn't, also I asked you to focus on finishing your analyses of all the departments, not to worry about the format. The format doesn't matter.

But here's the thing right.

The FORMAT MATTERS.

SHE LITERALLY TOLD ME TO CHANGE IT BECAUSE OF HOW MUCH THE FORMAT MATTERS.

And she's starting to go off and she's beginning to yell at me here...in front of any entire team of people...and I just had to cut her off, because if I don't, she's just gonna rant at me for an hour and then hang up and neither of us will have what we want, ie, she won't have the product she's imagining (which doesn't exist apparently bc she contradicted her own wishes), and I won't have the guidance I need to make the product.

So I interrupt her and say I already did that. The analysis is done. Now it's just the format that matters.

Now, she's very angry about the interruption, because she CONTINUES to just bulldoze right over me and keep talking...

And my supervisor, let's call her Sarah, then explodes and says, "Let him talk! He's trying to explain to you what he did and you're not letting him defend himself!"

And audience.

Fellow countrymen...

I would kill for Sarah, I really would.

I was so happy to have someone speak up for me.

But anyway.

So we finish the meeting, although it's very icy and very angry.

And then Sarah calls me immediately.

And she says oh my god I'm so sorry about that, what was that BS?

And I'm like...I'm like so happy to have someone on my side that I just say thank you for standing up for me there.

And she goes into this wild ass, amazing rant and she DISHED, BOYS AND GALS AND NONBINARY PALS.

APPARENTLY, Margaret has bullied every single contractor she's EVER had.

The guy she keeps telling me to defer to?

She tried to FIRE HIS ASS like a month ago.

The guy she keeps saying is like a godsend because he's sooo helpful?

She tried to fire him in his first month.

She was also apparently so hated at her last office that she had to leave because she wasn't getting any respect. She's been shunted all over the department because no one can stand working with her.

She has such poor interpersonal skills and fails so hard at communicating that she literally has clashed with every single member of her team.

And she hates me because I'm harder to bully.

Because I know what the fuck I'm talking about and I don't let her beat me down with her backwards ass contradictory logic.

And here's the spicy drama...

Apparently when Sarah interrupted her earlier...she literally texted HER BOSS, let's call her Laura...to complain that Sarah and I are "working together" and "conspiring" against her.

because "Kai was contradicting himself and when I tried to call him out on it, he INTERRUPTED me and then Christine ENCOURAGED him to and I just thought you should know."

And I find that really fucking funny.

Because she complained to her boss...who immediately sent THAT SCREENSHOT TO THE SAME PERSON SHE WAS COMPLAINING ABOUT.

So YEAH Margaret. We ARE conspiring against you.

But you don't have any allies, as evidenced by the fact that complaining to your boss literally made her roll her eyes and say ah Margaret is at it again...to the same person that Margaret is bitching about.

Anyway.

Totally insane.

Sarah told me, you're very professional and reasonable and sweet, and honestly, I feel protective of you because you're the youngest member of the team and I know that working with Margaret might make you feel like you never want to work again...but you're honestly very good at your job and I won't let Margaret fire you...

And I was really floored by the show of loyalty...

I also laughed because she said, I don't mind taking the heat from Margaret. What's she gonna do, fire me? (She doesn't work for Margaret and is sort of lateral to her position anyway).

I'd like to see her try.

And anyway.

Anyway that was the beginning of my crazy day.

Honestly I'm just smiling.

I've never had a supervisor stick up for me as much as Sarah and I'd love to keep working for her...it's just a shame if she can't keep me from being fired by the madwoman that leads our team.

I hope she'll let me know if Margaret decides to fire me because I dared using Microsoft excel in her presence again...

I'm so sorry that when you work for the government, you sometimes have to read things...

So sorry. But what do you want me to do about it?

Why hire a writer if you're scared of reading?

[jaylikesrainbowtigers]

Greek Gods as Incorrect Quotes Pt 4

Artemis: I'm gonna need a human skull but you can't ask why.  Athena: Only if you also don't ask why.  Athena: *pulls four pristine human skulls out of their bag*  Artemis: ...  Artemis, grabbing a skull: This one will do.

Dionysus: I'm going the fight the next person who insults Ariadne.  Ariadne: I hate myself.  Dionysus: Alright, square up.

Hermes: Hey, can we stay in your dorm tonight?  Hephaestus: Why?  Dionysus: Ares fiddled with an ouija board and cursed ours.  Hermes: Apollo doesn't know how to banish spirits, so he just threw salt at them and yell "DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A HOTEL TO YOU?!"

Aphrodite: If looking good was a crime, you’d be a law abiding citizen. 

Zeus, handing out popsicles: Which flavor do you want?  Hermes: Blue flavor!  Zeus: Uh, you mean Blue Raspberry?  Hermes: Blue flavor! Blue flavor!  Zeus: Blue is not a flavor!  Hermes: BLUE FLAVOR!

Apollo: A butterfly! Hey, little guy, gal or nonbinary pal!  Aphrodite: Can a butterfly be nonbinary?  Apollo: I mean, maybe? I don't judge.  Dionysus, staring dreamily out of the window: Ah, have you ever imagine having butterfly wings? Then-  Artemis: Then it would be inconvenient as f*ck. Your wings would smack every doorframe and your clothes would have to have holes in the back.  Ares: Also, your wing's paper thin, so even a six year old aimed a NERF gun at it would... Yeah...  Hermes: *sips coffee* According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that a-  Dionysus: No, nononono. You f*ckers have already shattered my dream, you don't get the f*cking privilege to make that reference.  Athena: Also, it's about a butterfly, not a bee... Why would you make that reference?  Apollo: You clearly have not lived with him long enough.

Artemis: Theater kids are just choir kids who joined forces with the band and strings kids. 

Ares: The moon looks beautiful, doesn’t it?  Hephaestus, looking at Ares: Yeah… but do you know what’s more beautiful?  Ares and Hephaestus in unison: *sighs* Aphrodite

Hera: Hephaestus! What did I tell you about lying?  Hephaestus, looking down: ...That it only works on Zeus.

Ares: My life is a little too much panic and not enough disco.  Hermes: My life is a little too much fall and not enough boy.  Apollo: My life is a little too much chemical and not enough romance.  Dionysus: My life is a little too much imagination and not nearly enough dragons. Athena: Why? Just why?

Apollo: Do you take constructive criticism?  Hermes: No, only cash or credit.

Apollo: What situation is not instantly improved by the addition of fishnets, I ask you.  Artemis: Being a fish.  Apollo: Well, sh*t.

Dionysus: Forgive me Father, for I have sinny-sin-sinned.

[empiresblrmybeloved]

I posted 3,324 times in 2022

That's 3,115 more posts than 2021!

385 posts created (12%)

2,939 posts reblogged (88%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@pencil-case-watches

@hiveswap

@kish-go-squish

@orangekingfisher

@juststarsandthemoon

I tagged 725 of my posts in 2022

#valor.txt - 25 posts

#prev - 21 posts

#the admier chronicles - 16 posts

#grian.txt - 10 posts

#glits reblogs - 9 posts

#agere sfw - 8 posts

#tasting the inedibles - 8 posts

#sam.txt - 8 posts

#carlos.txt - 8 posts

#age regressor - 7 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#sam has pouted multiple times i the last few minutes because im cussing so im gonna try to keep it at a down low but if that dndn. filter is

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

OK BUT WE MADE A TAG EARLIER ABOUT HOW WE COULD FIND A WAY TO ADD THE HERMITS INTO A DND GAME AND WE CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT IT BECUASE. THE RIFT. IS LITTERALY. PERFECT FOR THIS. AND WE KINDA WANNA DO IT

36 notes - Posted April 20, 2022

#4

not that I'm a pouty baby but.

I've been pouting cause i want cuddles for a solid 5mins.

57 notes - Posted May 3, 2022

#3

Guys, Gals Nonbinary pals (you know the reference) I have an idea

It came to me like a minute ago but still an idea

A day for Age regressors. listen if there's a Pizza day i mean,, we can have our own day right? Just a day for recognition, and while i know that some people will treat us the same they did before after that day, its still, a step in the right direction, for getting people to treat us nicely. Now personally i keep getting in with the right groups, but i know some people who have been treated like sh!t because there an age regressor, and honestly i want that to stop.

It's Our coping mechanism we shouldn't feel ashamed of it, just because someone sees it as something else.

So a day for Age Regressors, where we can be as loud or quiet as we want!

What do you people think?

71 notes - Posted February 10, 2022

#2

Heylo Tumblr! I've just had an idea!

Since pride month is coming up; and we know there are some people who might not be able to go to pride parades or any pride events; and We want to fix that!

The idea we've had will not be easy; at least i don't think so. But we would like to -with the help of others- host an online pride event! right here on tumblr!

The idea came to us as our host, Fire has not been able to go to any pride events within the past 2-3 years due to having an unsupportive family, and he's not the only one either.

so; we've created a survey for this! you are only required to answer the first question! the rest is optional!

Thank you for taking the time to read this; and we hope you have a great day!

84 notes - Posted May 11, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Hey Hey! Picrew chain time!! what you look like and what you want to look like!!

What i look like

and what i want too look like!!

See the full post

89 notes - Posted April 21, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[ahyesthesufferingoftvteens]

Rating The Hollow Ships Because I’m Bored

*Clears throat* First of all I should mention these are just my opinions, straight up. Hell, I don’t even hate any of the ships I’m about to talk about, so I’m not making this to diss anyone. I’m more interested in seeing people reblog their own ratings for each ship I’m going to talk about. It’d make for an interesting discussion. Trying to keep this fandom alive SOMEHOW y’know?

Anyways let’s begin:

Kai x Adam/Kaidam:

Right here we got a classic. I honestly don’t really have a lot to say here; they have enough sauce (shipping material) in the canon for me to assess the vibes, and I like those vibes.

They’d be really cute together; they’re one of the softer couples.

Overall: 7.5/10

Adam x Reeve/Reedam:

Friends to enemies to friends to lovers? I can dig this! They have a lot going for them considering what was set up in season 2, and if season 3 had become a thing, I wouldn’t have been surprised if Reedam had become canon.

Not my favorite ship, but it's pretty cool.

Overall: 7/10

Reeve x Kai/Reekai:

OK HEAR ME OUT! Think about Kai slowly distancing himself from the gang now that Reeve is friends with Mira and Adam again. Imagine Kai internalizing what Adam told him in that castle, about there being an opening, and that he was "available," basically hinting that Kai was originally Reeve's replacement for the game, and nothing more (at first at least). Imagine Kai thinking Adam and Mira don't need him anymore. NOW imagine Reeve gets all soft for Kai, learns about their pity party and just showers them with tones of affection and tells them their amazing? Imagine Reeve getting protective of Kai. Imagine Reeve getting ANGRY at what Adam implied in that castle and forcing him to apologize to Kai. Imagine Reeve being more reserved in public, but showing more of his true self to Kai. Just...They'd be so cute! Probably chaotic too but so cute!

I'm litetlly foaminghg in my mouthe. GOOD STUFF RIGHT HERE THIS SOME GOOD GOOD STUFF! OTP. Best thing I ever thought of. I shipped them as a joke at first and I don’t regret it in the slightest!

Overall: 10/10

Reeve x Adam x Kai/Reekaidam:

Boys, Gals, and nonbinary pals, I present to you: The Big Gay™. Seriously, this is the best of both worlds. You get Kai being doted on, Adam being sweet to his boyfriends, AND Reeve being a tsundere with a heart of gold.

One of the greatest things to have been conceived.

Overall: 9.5/10

Skeet x Mira/Skira:

Yes, amazing. Beautiful. I’m surprised they aren’t canonically sweethearts and haven’t given each other promise rings. So much subtext man, so much.

I'm literally crying right now. They’re so precious

Overall: 9/10

Mira x Vanessa/Vanira:

I honestly don't know how to feel about this one. I feel like people only ship this because back in season 1 Mira and Vanessa were the only wamen and therefore the only possible lesbian couple despite the fact that they don't really got a lot of sauce going on in both seasons. Can’t say I blame you guys though.

Can't really determine the vibes but if I think about it really hard, yeah, it could be cute!

Overall: 5/10

Kai x Vanessa/Kainessa:

Makes me...pretty uncomfortable to be honest? Like the first season? Nah! Kai deserves better. After the second season? Um sir I'm sorry but they are literally each others emotional support siblings and have sleepovers where they braid each others hair and trash-talk their friends. As a BROTP? Heck yeah! As an actually relationship? Only under specific circumstances. I don’t know, maybe because it was so unnaturally forced in both seasons.

I'm sorry but I personally it’s not really my thing. No shade to those who do though, I can see how it appeals to other people.

Overall: 3.5/10

Nisha x Iris/Irsha:

Now this is what you call an adorable lesbian couple. These two would defend each other to hell. They’re basically the “We are going to beat you to death” duo. Iris possibly being nonbinary makes it even better.

angry girl and soft baby can have my wallet and my heart.

Overall: 7/10

Iris x Tyler/Tyris:

This ship is basically two soft babies blushing like tomatoes over unprotected handholding™. Probably cuddle on the couch while watching anime and infodump about their favorite shows onto each other.

The purest ship in The Hollow to ever exist, period. I love it.

Overall: 7.5/10

Tyler x Nisha/Tysha:

The Girlboss and the Malewife duo. Nothing else needs to be said, this alone makes the ship great. Tyler loves his feisty girlfriend very much and Nisha gives her boyfriend plenty of attention in their freetime.

Adorable. I dig it.

Overall: 7/10

May or may not update this post as I consider more possible pairings for this show. I hope this has entertained some of y’all!

[a-sweet-pea]

Happy (tumblr) Birthday to Me!

Guys, gals, and nonbinary pals; this tumblr is officially three years (and one day) old!

A lot has happened in the time since I created this blog; got diagnosed with cancer, moved houses, started chemotherapy, had emergency life-saving surgery, watched a global pandemic throw the whole world off its groove, switched to an experimental medication, lost my hair, lost my job, got my hair back; its been a fuckin’ TRIP to say the least.

Through it all, I can’t tell you what a joy and comfort has been to be part of a community of cool folks creating and sharing giant/tiny content. Despite how sporadically I post, I have managed to amass a group of over FIVE HUNDRED PEOPLE who like my writing enough to actually follow me! (And probably only half of them are porn bots). If I was sixty feet tall, I would scoop you all into a big hug and boop all your noses one by one.

I’ve been brainstorming ways to celebrate this milestone, and in the spirit of encouraging me to write more things, drop into my ask box with questions about my characters or my ongoing stories, or prompts you’d like to see me drabble about, or anything you think might inspire a fun bit of G/t content I could share, or just questions about me, or comments about your favorite kind of bugs, or just say hi, or literally whatever!

(Alternatively, as a tumblr-birthday present, if you just wanted to go back and leave a comment on a story you enjoyed, that would make my day.)

Also, I’m going to search back through my blog and try to find the fanart that folks drew (back when I updated often enough to spawn fanart) and reblbog it all again, because honestly, people drawing fanart of something I wrote rockets my seratonin levels through the roof, and it deserves reblogging.

ALSO Also, let’s celebrate with a brand new icon of Fairy Elle (aka fairy sweetpea), drawn by the incredible @remordsposthume and colored by yours truly!

(I’m going to make the background Giant Elle once I get around to commissioning someone, so keep your eyes peeled for that).

I love and apprecate all of you so much, here’s to many more years of shitposting and occasional out-of-nowhere, 2k updates to stories that everyone has forgotten about :D

[tachyonpen]

Weird size community meme idea- your taste in size content represented via playing cards.

No, seriously.

Set the red suits and black suits in two separate piles to start, and set the Jokers aside- cards laid vertically will be things that you're generally interested in, or that you'd like to see in a partner of a different size. Cards laid horizontally will be ideas that would apply to you.

The black suits, clubs and spades, will be giant-related. First, kings, queens and jacks- guys, gals, and nonbinary; who's the big party in your ideal g/t story?

Next, the numbered cards. In a setting built for the smaller party (so the big ones are giants, dealing with inconveniences like being unable to ride in cars or enter most buildings comfortably), what's your ideal size gap between the giant(s) and everybody else? [Word to the wise- The max. height is going to be A) in Imperial units and B) shown off using a relatively short 5 ft tall and a very tall 6'8" multiplied up to the relevant proportions ahead, like so 5'/6'8"]. 2 is up to about double, where everyone is about double-ish the norm- 10/13 feet, about, so the smaller ones come up to their waist or higher, typically. 3 would be from there up to about 5x the norm, so anywhere up to 25/33 feet tall- about to the shin. 4 is from there up to the beloved Brobdingnagian x12 difference, or 60/80 feet tall- one foot to the humans is about an inch to the bigs. 5 is from those proportions up to a 20x difference, 100/133 ft, where people are about the size of their finger or ear, and a 5/6 story building is their equal in height. 6 is where we start getting crazy- an up to 60x difference, 300/400 ft. tall, meaning the average person is only as tall as their toes, and their proportions mean that they need to be careful lest they knock over skyscrapers- they're about as tall as a 15/20 story building at this point. 7 is a difference up to 240x, or 1200/1600 ft tall, which is the point where they'd start genuinely causing damage to the landscape and civilization with their footsteps, and people would start to resemble small bugs to them. 8 on up is much less common, but I'll keep going- this number indicates anywhere up to a 500x difference between the giant and the human civilization, or 2500/3333 feet tall; this is around half a mile, and where living on or inside the giant(s) becomes a feasible option- the giant would be no more cognizant of the individual people than we would be an aphid. 9 is where we make significantly larger jumps for those who like their giants colossal- this covers anything up to 7,500,000x normal size, or 7500/9833 miles tall- approximately the same size as Earth's diameter, or literally planetary-scale giants. Lastly, 10 covers anything up to 225 million times normal size, up to 225,000/300,000 miles tall- so large than even the Earth itself is 2 inches across, or about the size of a largish gumball, by comparison to the giant, a card I don't expect most of you to set out.

Last, the ace- do you like it when the big has to grow big to get like this? Its absence will be for giants born enormous (or made enormous in the case of mechanical or divine beings).

For the red suits, your hearts and diamonds, these are for tiny roles. Again, the kings, queens, and jacks- tiny guys, smol gals, little enby pals.

The numbered cards here refer to settings designed for the comfort of the bigger party- your Borrower or HIStK settings go here. 2 is for anything down to half-size smalls, 2'6"/3'4" coming up to about the waist of their bigger counterparts- an inconvenient existence, but not by too much. 3 is from that point down to one-fourth size, 15"/20", which would leave our smaller party at about knee height, and taller people would look like two-story buildings at about this point. 4 takes us down to one-sixth size, 10"/13", which is about the length of the bigger people's forearm, and just the right size to mount your average housecat or small dog like a horse. 5 takes us down to Lilliputian one-twelfth, or 5/7 inches tall- this would put the smaller ones at about the length of people's hands from base of palm to tip of pinky finger, and small enough to hide in underwear; notably, this is a great "small civilization" size in other works as well, with mice and rats occupying a role as mounts, various common lizards acting the role of dragon, and both cats and hawks being relatively threatening. 6 takes us to the ever popular one-twentieth, or 3/4 inches tall- about as tall as a person's ear, or as long as their finger if laid out; notably, this is a pretty common Borrower size, as your bog standard inch-and-a-half sewing needle makes for a decent rapier at this scale, large bugs are a relatively even fight, socks are bigger than you and fluffy enough to make into beds, etc. 7 takes us to the one-sixtieth size smalls, or approximately an inch tall- to the people, they're about as tall as their toe, or the length of a single joint on a finger; these are the settings where they frequently interact with, say, snails, crickets, and hummingbirds, but brown ants are about the size of dogs to the littles. 8 is where we start getting extra little, specifically down to one-hundred-twentieth scale- this makes the smalls about the length of the bed of an unpainted fingernail, and where the common small trope of "a few crumbs is too much" genuinely starts to apply. 9 takes us all the way down to one-five-hundredth scale smalls, or about the size of fleas- notably, this makes the smalls actually small enough to not break water's surface tension (read- walk on dirty water) and a head of hair becomes a forest. 10, lastly, brings us down to the genuinely microscopic smalls, the ones who can't be effectively seen by the naked eye unless they're moving or in a group, down to 1/1200 scale for the sake of stating an identifiable number- at this size, every inch is a five-mile trek, meaning that it's usually reserved for brief jokes and villain punishments; that said, would briefly like to note Fantastic Voyage plots, but effective conversion for numbers that small is giving me a headache.

These aces note a love of shrinking itself being pointed out. If not used, they instead indicate littles born or created that size being your preference.

You can use as many cards as apply to your tastes.

[eepytheartist]

TTTE: Magic Beyond the Engine

Greetings guys, gals, nonbinary pals and everyone in between. Welcome to the Information Page of TTTE: Magic Beyond the Engine, where you can get context to whatever the hell I post on here. There’s a lot and much is subject to change, so buckle up butter cups because we’re going for a ride.

Table o’ Contents

1. Basic Story

2. Characters

3. Personal Headcanons

4. Canonical Relationships within TTTE: MBtE

5. Other Notes

6. Link

I) Basic Story

   Several years ago in the year 20XX, a facility located in [REDACTED] was doing experiments involving a mysterious golden substance and what it could do for the human race. Its goal was to eliminate the need for high-maintenance engines to save money. However, much of what was done ended up being a total flop, except for one. A little girl, Madison [REDACTED] was the only successful trial the facility was able to produce. This girl didn’t know why or how she even got here, but knew that her family didn’t want her, and instead gave her up to this [probably very illegal] facility. For years the scientists running the experiment pushed her to her limits, training her to pull lines of cars weighing several tons. They were delighted by what she could do. They had finally compacted the strength and speed of an engine into a human. However, bad luck struck as the facility went belly up, when Madison was 21. News of the facility spread, and so did news about her. Humanity didn’t take her well, and she was labeled an outcast. Though, in the light of things with her negative fame, Sir Topham Hatt found out about her and thought she’d be a wonderful addition to the railway along with the new tank engine he just bought! So she was picked up by this cheeky little shit, and her story working alongside sentient engines unfolded.

II) Characters

   A) Thomas

      The one who picked up Maddy. He was awfully confused by her, but respected her nonetheless. Still his cheeky self that everyone seems to just adore, Thomas quickly became best friends with her, protecting her whenever she needed it. Thomas sometimes gets a little too cheeky, and pushes her off the edge. Pranks ensue and Thomas is usually left bumbling for apologies. Who knew something so small could be so dangerous. He also commonly gets called ‘Tommy’ by the wee lass, something he absolutely despises. It only fuels her need to use it.

         1) When human, Thomas stands at about 5′ 7″ or 170 centimeters. He’s clad in a simple hoodie that matches his paintwork with a big 1 on the back, and plain khakis. He wishes he could have something else, but he doesn’t get paid and his driver and fireman refuse to lend him money. His hair is fluffy and rather short and is a few shades darker than his paintwork. Maddy likes to braid it when she’s bored and he hates it. Her favorite part though, besides honking his bulbous nose like he was a clown like she does with James, is his eyes. They were a beautiful shade of ocean blue. If he wasn’t such a shit, she’d get lost. He can’t brag though, she basks in all the colors her friends have. 

“Why does she get to swear and I don’t? It’s not fair!” ~T

“Maddy’s an adult, Thomas.” ~E

“Well so am I you old fart!” ~T

   B) Maddy

      Little Maddy. Don’t call her Madison, she hates it with a passion and refuses to explain why. She currently stands at the age of 21, but looks much younger. She had overheard at the facility that a side effect of the mystery stuff was that she aged like an engine, so she could be around for hundreds of years if she wasn’t stupid. At just 5′ 3′’ or 160 centimeters, Maddy is the shortest out of all the engines on the railway, even Bill and Ben. Her hair is a medium shade of brown, kind of long, and it mostly covers one of her eyes, which are, as Thomas describes, “As if the sky could make steel.”. Shy when you first meet her, Maddy is quick to come out of her shell and be just as much of a shithead as Thomas and as angry as James, if not worse than the two combined. Her outfit was rather simple, a dark scarlet hoodie with her number on it, and dark grey or black leggings. She liked it that way, she looked good and it was flexible and comfy. When she first arrived with Thomas, she felt something click with James, despite him being an utter jackass to her. After begrudgingly showing her around and having to shunt trucks, the duo became good acquaintances. It wasn’t until after James’ accident that the two became best friends, being asshats together and generally being a happy sight. He’s the one Maddy is generally seen with if she’s not working on her own. Soon enough, though, something started brewing within her heart.

“Ah crumbs, he’s in a mood.” ~T

“James is always in a mood.” ~M

“Fuck both of you.” ~J

   C) Edward

      Ah, Old Iron. He was there when Thomas and Maddy first arrived to the island. Like most that laid eyes on her, his main worry is that she was itty bitty. Usually calm and collected unless something goes majorly wrong, Edward was quick to unknowingly swoop her under his wings. When Thomas started poking fun at him for being fatherly, Edward nearly keeled over. An engine can’t father a human, can they? He guessed they could as soon after Maddy just gave a shrug and accepted the Number 2 as her father, after being given away by her own. It didn’t take long for Edward to actually father her, asking how her day was, sometimes folding her laundry, comforting her, scolding Maddy James, y’know, dad stuff. He earned the name ‘Dadward’ from her, and his heart melts every time she says it.

         1) As a human, Edward looks like a kindly old man and a youngin’ at the same time. He stands just a bit shorter than James at 6′ or 183 centimeters. With short, almost midnight-blue hair, Edward is the perfect gentleman. He even has a small pair of gold glasses that set snuggly on his nose. His eyes are a lovely shade of steel blue, something he gets flustered about when Maddy compliments him. His outfit consists of a white dress shirt with a dark blue tie, a blazer matching his paintwork with his number on his right arm and dark grey dress pants. He’s not usually in his human form, but when he is, Maddy unusually asks for a lot of hugs..

“Will you two leave her be?” -E

“But look how red her face is!” P&T

“FUCK THE LOT OF YOU-” ~M

   D) James

      Ah, James. One half of what his friends call “The Red Disasters”. He’s still his normal, vain ass self. He has a soft side, everyone knows it but virtually no one can get to it. Except Maddy, who can get to it quite easily. Though, when they first met, all he did was make fun of her. Well, they made fun of each other, but still. They had the complete opposite of favorite jobs, they still do and always will. James loves pulling coaches, she hates it. She loves trucks, he despises it and always tries to weasel his way out. It usually doesn’t work. He’s earned many nicknames from her: Jamsey, Jimbo, Buzzy, Buzzy Butt, the list grows. Two of them came from the mistake about telling her the story about the bees, the other.he’s not too sure. What he is sure of, though, is that Jimbo has spread than to more than just her and he hates it. It fuels her though, so he’s gotta be careful. Originally, though, James didn’t know what to think of her. After the accident, his boiler felt all fluttery and he pushed it down to just being ill. He had to learn the hard way about what romantic love was. He knew how to flirt, it got people to love him more! But what that flirting did, though, he was completely foreign to.

         1) At 6′2′’ or 188 centimeters, James stands as the third tallest among the main eight. When he still had his black livery, James’ human form basically had him looking like what I can simply describe as a butler, though he had a vest and a red tie instead of all black. After, though, he had quite the change. His long, black hair now had dyed red tips and his right ear had a cute little heart piercing. Hair covers most of his left eye, which is what Maddy lovingly described as, “You managed to make the color of red rust beautiful.”. He thinks his hair looks cool only according to Maddy. He usually wears a long-sleeve, dark red button-up shirt with three dark grey stripes on both arms and grey pads on his shoulders. His number was sewn onto his left breast. Maddy pokes fun at him for looking like a band geek, but she nonetheless likes it. His outfit is simply finished off with grey pants. Sometimes, though, he’s seen wearing a solid red hoodie that Maddy got him. He won’t admit that it’s his favorite piece of clothing.

“Honey Bee, you’re acting irrational-” ~J

“DON’T MAKE ME GET THE BEES-” ~M

“NOT THE BEES-” ~J

   E) Gordon

      There isn’t much to say about Gordon. He’s his usual, grumpy self. We all know deep down he’s a good engine, though. Gordon’s...rather indifferent about Maddy. He doesn’t dislike her, but he doesn’t see her appeal either. Nonetheless, she’s an awesome part of the team. She does the most important job: listening to James bitch so they don’t have to. Of course, though, like the rest of the team, he’ll defend her if need be. Gordon has a heart, he just doesn’t like to show it.

         1) Gordon’s the tallest, at 6′8′’ or 203 centimeters. Everything about his human form is perfect. His hair is just a tad darker than Edward’s and a teeny bit shorter. He keeps it slicked back most of the time, but it’s hilarious when he has bed head. Maddy got a picture once and sent it to James just in case he forced her to delete it. Just like most of her friends, Gordon’s eyes were her favorite, they were a blue similar to his hair, but a few shades lighter. Maddy remembers a time she complimented them and Gordon puffed away all red in the face. His outfit consists of a three piece suit, in his paintwork color of course, a white shirt and a red tie. His number is on his right breast.

“The Express isn’t that important.” ~M

“Why I’ll tell you-” ~G

“Is her intent just to piss him off?” ~E

“Yes. It’s both of ours.” ~J

   E) Henry

      Maddy’s favorite engine besides James. Thomas is insulted that he isn’t even considered one of her favorites. Henry gushed over her the first time she came. He must protect the small. Love the small. If James suddenly didn’t exist, Henry would be her go-to. She adored puffing through the forest with him, looking at all the trees and wildlife. Maddy would take pictures of flowers she’d find while strolling through and Henry would just ooze over them. Once she showed him a photo of a squirrel holding a wild flower under an oak tree whose leaves were just started to turn different colors, and the big engine cried with joy. He requested she print the picture out so his driver could carry it for him, and she did. It was his absolute favorite.

         1) 6′6″ or 198 centimeters, what a height to be. At second tallest, Henry is the definition of a gentle giant. His resting face looks nervous, but he’s usually not nervous at all. His hair is a forest green, not too short, not too long. Actually, Maddy’s favorite part of him is his chicken-wing bangs. Of course she loves his eyes, which are a lovely jade green, but the bangs take the cake, Whenever they hang out, she likes to play with them when he talks about plants. He finds it comforting. His outfit is literally just a more modest and fancier workman’s outfit, but matching his livery, with his number on his right breast. It made sense, since he was usually one to do heavy work.

“You don’t like the rain either?” ~H

“The last time I went out in the rain I derailed Percy.” ~M

“Why were you even out in the rain!? You’d catch a cold!” ~E

“Fat Man said I was the only one available and told me to suck it up. I did catch a cold. James tried making me soup, remember?” ~M

“What do you mean tried..?” ~H

“He forgot to cook the chicken beforehand. I got salmonella.” ~M

“So that’s why you were bedridden and wouldn’t talk to him for a week after..” ~H

   G) Percy

      Ah, little shit number two. Thomas’ partner in crime. When he first met Maddy when he arrived, he teased her relentlessly for being short-tempered and short in general. After giving him the silent treatment though, Percy was a bit nicer. He and Thomas still tease her plenty enough, but they tease about things she usually won’t kick their asses for. He likes Maddy now. Plain and simple.

         1) Second shortest, 5′5″ or 165 centimeters. He holds those two inches with pride. Percy uses them against Maddy very frequently. Maddy won’t hurt him though. She physically can’t. His little baby face, those big ol’ light green eyes, that short light green hair, his cute little outfit [which consists of a shamrock colored shirt, black suspenders held up by gold buttons, and dark green shorts]. If he was any smaller Maddy would die. James sometimes gets jealous by how much she gushes over Percy, but doesn’t exactly blame her. Percy’s adorable and he damn well knows it.

“Ha, you’re short.” ~P

“You’re short too.” ~M

“I’m taller than you.” ~P

“Won’t be for long when I take your kneecaps.” ~M

   H) Emily

   Ah, Emily. The first girl engine she met. They made damn good friends, too. They gossiped whenever they had a chance. Maddy usually talked about shit James has said, and Emily just gossips about anything and everything. They were will to throw hands for each other, with Emily more willing to for Maddy. Maddy would throw hands just as an excuse to do it. Emily still loves her, though.

         1) Emily currently stands at 5′8″ or 173 centimeters. She isn’t as girly as she looks, either. Her hair is short, with half of it buzzed off. Maddy would describe her as someone punk-ish. Of course Emily’s personality doesn’t reflect that at all, she just chose to look like it. She’s the only other engine besides James to have piercings, usually with two black on on the top of her ears and hoop earrings to pay honor to her engine build. Emily was a little more casual than her friends, usually seen wearing a simple green dress matching her livery. Her eyes were a very dark grey, almost black, with flecks of brass scattered in there. Maddy told her once that she was the prettiest girl she’s every seen and Emily nearly crashed.

“James being a bitch again?” ~Em

“What do you mean again?” ~M

“I can hear you.” ~J

“I know.” ~M

   I) Others

      Other characters consist of secondary characters within the story who do not play as big a role. There are a few who teeter on the edge between primary and secondary characters, such as Duck, Donald, Douglas, Diesel, Diesel 10, and Lady. They play an important role, but not enough so to have their own descriptions. Diesel’s..y’know, Diesel, the twins think of Maddy as their long-lost sister, Duck..well, they like to poke fun at James together when he’s not droning about the Great Western Railway, Diesel 10′s goal is to get her to say something about Lady, and Lady...no one’s really sure yet. Then, as of right now for true secondary characters there is Oliver, Toad, BoCo, Bill, Ben, Mavis, and Salty. There’s more to come, but that’s what I got right now.

III) Personal Headcanons

-The engines can eat and taste in both forms. They don’t know where it goes when they’re engines and don’t feel like finding out.

-James learned to cook for Maddy when she couldn’t for herself.

-For the longest time, James was the only engine with his own phone.

   -He learned hip language and Maddy started regretting every choice in her life.

-Maddy comes to Salty for him to tell her stories when she’s bored.

-Rain is Maddy’s one weakness since she has no way of covering herself.

-She, along with her friends as humans, run with skates that reflect their wheel configuration. The wheels retract when not in use. [I’m thinking about switching to roller blades, we’ll see.]

-Maddy intentionally starts beef with the Scottish Twins because she thinks the fighting is hilarious.

-Thomas will occasionally beg Maddy for a cotton candy sucker. Specifically cotton candy. She doesn’t know why either.

-Thomas initiated a prank war with her once. He lost.

-Gordon once bet her that she couldn’t pull his heavy goods. His driver was out 30 bucks because of him.

-Maddy tortures Duck with duck puns.

-Maddy still trick-or-treats for free candy.

-Emily once convinced Maddy to derail James for the fun of it. She was subsequently chased around the island.

-James is the ultimate flirt and he uses that against Maddy, who flusters very easily. 

-Percy loves Teddy Grahams.

-Edward likes loves to tell others about his daughter. Maddy does not. He is becoming too dad-like.

-The Scottish Twins know damn well that Maddy simps for their accents and they intentionally use it against her if they can.

-Maddy knows about Diesel’s ducklings. It’s the only reason she decides to befriend him.

-James utterly hates Diesel for many many reasons.

-Like many others headcanon, Thomas can’t cook. He fucked up a cup of ramen once and Maddy still refuses to let him live it down.

-Edward refuses to let Thomas and Percy swear. They hate it. James and Maddy know this. They swear more because they can’t.

-James and Maddy are at a tie for worst potty mouths. The twins don’t count. That’s not fair.

-Oliver thought Maddy was an engine for like a month before he met her.

-Maddy dislikes the Mainland. Not the engines there. They’re cool. 

-If Maddy isn’t around, James sleeps in her bed with her hoodie.

-Henry worries for Maddy all the time. More and Edward and James combined. He just doesn’t show it.

-Gordon says he has no opinion on Maddy, but he really does like her.

-No one knows where Maddy’s really from. She won’t tell them either. Not even James or the Fat Man really know.

-Want more? Just ask!

IV) Canon Couples within TTTE: MBtE

~James/Maddy

~Edward/Henry

~Emily/Thomas

~D10/Lady (In the past)

~~We’ll see about others as the story progresses~~

V) Notes

- Lady is the reason the engines have sentience. She is not the reason for their human forms. That will be explained later.

-Maddy is much more resilient than an average human, which is why most accidents don’t just straight up kill her.

-As stated before, Maddy can now live for hundreds of years if she’s careful enough. She won’t age as fast as a normal human, so who knows how long she’ll be baby-faced. Not that she cares, more opportunity to trick-or-treat.

-The engines can get frisky, but no babies. Don’t even think about it.

-Maddy will eventually give in and buy beds for all her friends to give them an opportunity to sleep like she does.

VI) Link

Silly me, I forgot to give a link to my story! Shame on me for making you search, that won’t happen again, here you go!

Sodor’s New Worker

________________________________________________________________

And that’s really it. If you have any questions, please please please please please ask!

UPDATED: August 3, 2021

[thebisexualdogdad]

Well hello there guys, gals and nonbinary pals!

@inhumanshadows and I have a very exciting event planned for kinktober that we have been working on for a very long time!

Starting on October 1st through the 26th every day one of us will be posting a fic that we co-wrote correlating to what i call the 'ABC's of smut'!

Listed below is a teaser for what you guys can expect so make sure you're following both blogs to keep up with the all the action!

Italicized indicates eliotsbambimargo is posting

Bolded indicates inhumanshadows is posting

A is for asphyxiation with Oliver Queen

B is for body paint with Danny Mahealani

C is for car sex with Moose Mason

D is for double penetration with Nick Scratch and Harvey Kinkle

E is for exhibitionism with John Constantine

F is for friends with benefits with Isaac Lahey

G is for gym sex with Evan Buckley

H is for hair pulling with Jack Morton

I is for interrupted with Alec Lightwood

J is for  jealous sex with Brett Talbot

K is for Knife play with Lucifer Morningstar

L is for Lingerie with Randall Carpio

M is for Masochism with Dorian Grey

N is for nipple play with Caliban (CAOS)

O is for Orgasm Denial/ control with Aidan Waithe

P is for pool sex with Fangs Fogarty

Q is for quickie with Sweet Pea

R is for Ropes with Dick Grayson

S is for spanking with Peter Parker

T is for toys with Albert Han

U is for uniform with Frankie Rizzoli

V is for voyeurism with Harry Hook and Gil Legume

W is for worship, cock or body with Barry Allen

X is for x ray fantasies/confirmation with Connor Kent

Y is for yearning with Ray Palmer

Z is for zzz morning sex with Nate Heywood

Happy spooky season!

[kirishimas-manly-eyeliner]

Okay feel free to ignore this if you want it’s kinda just a huge rant thing about me thinking that my brothers might be racist so uh yeah, debated on being on anon for thsi or not for like ten minutes cause there some real personal stuff here. Kinda been bottling this up for a while and for some reason you seem like a good person to tell it to.

Tw cursing btw

So I’m white, might be a little sprinkle of Cuban but honestly have no idea besides that I’m white as hecc. I have four brothers, I’m also adopted, but because when I was adopted my biological brother wasn’t adopted too because he was already a adult. But my biological brother (just gonna call him bb if I refer to him again) is not white, we have different dads. I’m very much white and he’s black? I don’t really know, never asked and didn’t really see it as something important. I love him for him, his skin color never mattered in that. But if I had to describe it he’s a lighter black, maybe Arabic or Cuban? And most of my friends throughout my whole time living where I do, most of my friends are black, or Hispanic. So, as you can assume, I have lots of sympathy for POC. I have no idea what it’s like and try to support my friend any time they are put down for their skin color. (I may or may not have punch a kid once cause he said a friend of mine was disgusting and should “go back to her sick country” cause she’s a Muslim, apparently the kids grandpa died in 9/11 so liek I guess I can see where it’s from but like, dude……)

So I have three other brother, live with two of them cause the other moved out for college. So, now to the two brother might be racist part. Prepare to be pissed off 👍 /hj . So, when all the protests started at the begging of quarantine, my family talked a bit about it cause we had nothing else to do.

and these two straight, cis, white teens had the damn arrogance to BOTH say that they were “bullied for being white” and yeah, one of them was bullied very bad as a kid, but like??????? No?????? Just, no????? You are a cisgender white straight man????????? Who is considered attractive by most of your peers?????? YOU ARE NOT BULLIED, THERE MIGHT HAVE BEEN TIME WHERE SOMEONE TRIED TO SHAKE SOME SENSE INTO YOUR ASS THAT YOU LITERALLY ARE THE MOST PRIVILEGED PEOPLE IN AMERICA SINCE THE FUCKING BEGINNING AND YOU HAVE THE AUDACITY TO SAY THAT YOUR MADE FUN IF FOR IT??????? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?????

And MY shy ass didn’t say a damn thing because “it’s not my place to talk, I’m white as heck and have never been made fun of for being white”

And also, “racism it’s the even a big thing anymore”??????? PISSES ME OFF WHEN EVER I THINK OF IT TO NO END

Like, first of all, IF THERE ARE PROTESTS AND PEOPLE ARE BEING KILLED FOR BEING BLACK THEN I THINK RACISM IS STILL A THING !!!!!

Second, YOU ARE A MAN, A CISGENDER MAN!!!! BOTH OF YOU!!!!! MEANWHILE AT THE TIME I WAS STILL CLOSETED SO YOUR SAYING THIS SHIT IN FRONT OF YOUR “SISTER” WHO HAS SAID THAT “SHE” WAS PUT DOWN A NUMBER OF TIMES FOR BEING BIOGRAPHICALLY FEMALE BY BOYS WHO THREW ROCKS AT GIRLS IN FIRST GRADE????? WHO LITERALLY HAS A SCAR FROM A SHARP ROCK THAT WAS THROWN AT MY BACK BY SOME KID IN FIRST GRADE???????

THIRD, YOU ARE CIS GENDER!!!! Hey hey hey, buddy, imagine not being able to go outside without worrying that you’ll get killed while walking to the dollar tree because you drew a non-binary flag on your arm the other day and couldn’t rub it off!!!!! How great does that sound :D /s

Fourth, you are STRAIGHT!!!!!!! BEING THE GAY ONE IN THE FAMILY IS KINDA HARD! And then how much it hurt seeing them make jokes about slapping each other’s asses, and making fun of a kid cause he sounded gay (who literally became homophobic because of it, as a kid he was supportive of it, but now is sorta homophobic because he’s straight and has been made fun of for people thinking he’s gay), TOOK THE “pedophiles are being added to LGBT” FUCKING SERIOUSLY

LIKE, I WASN’T OUT AT THE TIME AND THEY STOPPED MAKING JOKES LIKE THAT AFTER I TOLD THEM, BUT THEY ARE SO HORRIBLE SOMETIMES I SWEAR!!!! I AHVE NO IDEA HOW YHEY GREW TO BE LIEK THIS BECAUSE MY MOM ALWAYS TELLS THEM TO FUCKING STOP BECAUSE ITS OFFENSIVE AND RUDE, AND MY DAD SHOWS THAT HE DOENST LIEK IT EITHER

so that’s my Ted talk, moral of the story, if your a straight white cisgender man stop complaining about it.

tw: racism, homophobia, transphobia

THAT SH!T PISSES ME OFF WTF

(DISCLAIMER: okay y’all, to be clear: i’m in no way bashing anyone who’s straight or cisgender. this is talking about the topic in general and how people have negative influences on others, but it’s not directly related to them being white, straight, and cis-- it’s about the way that they’re handling it and how immature those people are. please don’t be offended if you fit into any of those categories.)

okok, thanks for letting me know all of this info boo! just wanted to let you know that you’re one heck of an amazing person and i think you’re so so strong for still being here. so pls oml, GIVE YOURSELF A PAT ON THE BACK BECAUSE YOU DESERVE IT! and hey, despite all you’ve been through, i can’t stress HOW thankful i am that you haven’t let it get to you. you’re not a cold-hearted and rude person and that just fills me with so much love for you because that’s just such a beautiful thing. 

BUT NOW.

THE BROTHERS.

BAE I AM SO SORRY.

now now i’m supposed to be loving and kind to everyone, but this- i- i don’t know how to sugarcoat this. 

they are white.

they are cisgender.

and they are men, straight men, at that.

AND THEY HAVE THE AUDACITY TO SAY THAT THEY’VE BEEN BULLIED FOR BEING WHITE??

I JUST BLACKED OUT FOR A SECOND THERE

LISTEN, I KNOW THERE’S BEEN A LOT OF DISCRIMINATION LATELY. THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A VERY SWEET, KIND, AMAZING WHITE GUY GAL OR NONBINARY PAL SAYING THAT THEY GOT BULLIED IN GENERAL? THAT’S OKAY, COMPLETELY OKAY.

BUT IF THEY HAVE ALREADY CROSSED THE LINE MULTIPLE TIMES AND THEN CHOSE TO THINK ABOUT THEMSELVES FOR “being white??” like honey come again, what did they say?? like did someone go to you and say, “yooooo guys, i’m white!” and use their fingers to make their eyes bigger? and yet it’s okay when you, you stupid cis white straight man make your eyes smaller and say “ch*ng ch*ng” and sing it to a bunch of asian kids?? is that what it is to you?

CHERRY I AM SO SORRY WTF THAT MUST BE TERRIBLE

and then.

i am trying so very hard not to scream rn because i can FEEL your pain through this ask.

and tHEN THEY SAY “racism isn’t a big thing anymore.”

...i’m sorry, did i hear you correctly?

racism isn’t a big thing anymore?

RACISM ISN’T A BIG THING ANYMORE???

RIGHT, RIGHT, HOW ABOUT YOU TELL THAT TO THE MILLIONS OF PEOPLE WHO FOUGHT FOR BLM AND ASIAN LIVES AS THEY SCREAMED FOR JUSTICE?? HOW ABOUT YOU TELL THAT TO THE PEOPLE WHO’VE BEEN MURDERED JUST FOR BEING IN THEIR OWN SKIN?? HOW ABOUT YOU TELL THAT TO THE PEOPLE WHO’VE LOST FAMILY AND FRIENDS BECAUSE THEY WERE JUST BEING HUMAN.

AND THEN THEY DON’T RESPECT YOUR PRONOUNS??

i’m literally about to cry right now, that’s so messed up

AND I AM SO SORRY ON BEHALF OF WHAT YOU’RE GOING THROUGH, THIS MUST BE SO ROUGH RIGHT NOW AND I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TERRIBLE THIS MUST BE FOR WHAT YOU’RE GOING THROUGH.

BUT YOU

ARE

A 

STRONG

AMAZING

OVERLORD

AND I AM VERY VERY PROUD OF YOU

FOR FIGHTING AND CONTINUING TO BE KIND TO OTHERS

ILY VERY MUCH AND I THINK YOU’RE A NEAT PERSON, REMEMBER THAT YOU ARE VALID. YOU ARE SO VALID. ILY. 

[littlelittlebear]

I JUST CREATED THE BEST THING TO EVER EXIST

ahem, good evening guys, gals, and nonbinary pals-

moony, wormtail, padfoot, and prongs, are I’m proud to present the marauders map  ;

THE SHAKESPEAREAN WAP

I hath said, c'rtifi'd freak seven days a week wet-ass pussy maketh yond pull-out game weak, woo (ah) yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

yeah, thee fucking with some wet-ass pussy bringeth a bucket and a mop f'r this wet-ass pussy giveth me ev'rything thee did get f'r this wet-ass pussy did beat t up, nigga, catcheth a chargeth extra large and extra hard putteth this pussy right in thy visage swipe thy nose liketh a credit card hopeth on top, i wanna rideth i doth a kegel while t's inside spiteth in mine own that from which we speak, behold in mine own eyes this pussy is did wet, cometh taketh a diveth tieth me up liketh i'm surpris'd alloweth's role playeth, i'll weareth a disguise i wanteth thee to parketh yond big mack truck right in this dram garage maketh t cream, maketh me screameth out in public, maketh a scene i cook not, i crisp not but alloweth me bid thee how i did get this ringeth (ayy, ayy) gobble me, swallow me, dripeth down the side of me (yeah) quick, jumpeth out 'f're thee alloweth t receiveth inside of me (yeah) i bid that gent wh're to putteth t, nev'r bid that gent wh're i'm 'bout to beest i'll runneth down on that gent 'f're i has't a nigga running me (pow, pow) talketh thy the horror, biteth thy lip (yeah) asketh f'r a car while thee rideth yond dick (while thee rideth yond dick) thee very much ain't nev'r gotta alas that gent f'r a thang (yeah) that gent already madeth his mind up 'f're that gent cameth (ayy, ah) anon receiveth thy boots and thy coat (ah, ah, ah) f'r this wet-ass pussy that gent hath bought a phoneth just f'r pictures of this wet-ass pussy (click, click, click) payeth mine own tuition just to kisseth me on this wet-ass pussy (mwah, mwah, mwah) anon maketh t raineth if 't be true thee wanna seeth some wet-ass pussy (yeah, yeah) behold, i needeth a hard hitt'r, i needeth a deep strok'r i needeth a henny drinketh'r, i needeth a we'd smok'r not a garden snake, i needeth a king cobra with a hooketh in t, desire t leaneth ov'r

that gent did get some wage, then yond's wh're i'm head'd pussy a1, just liketh his credit that gent did get a beard, well, i'm tryna did wet t i alloweth that gent gust t, anon that gent diabetic

i wanna not spiteth, i wanna gulp i wanna gag, i wanna choketh i wanteth thee to toucheth yond lil' dangly thing yond swingeth in the backeth of mine own throat mine own headeth game is fireth, punani dasani t's going in dryeth and t's coming out soggy i rideth on yond thang liketh the cops is behind me (yeah, ah) i spiteth on his mic and anon that gent tryna signeth me, woo thy hon'r, i'm a freak wench, handcuffs, leashes switcheth mine own wig, maketh that gent feeleth liketh that gent cheating putteth that gent on his hams, giveth that gent something to believeth in nev'r hath lost a square, but i'm looking f'r a beating (ah) in the food bilboes, i'm the one yond consume ya if 't be true that gent consumed mine own rampallian, that gent's a bottom feedeth'r big d standeth f'r big demean'r i couldst maketh thee did bust bef're i ev'r meeteth ya if 't be true t hangeth not, then that gent can't bangeth thee can't did hurt mine own feelings, but i liketh teen if 't be true that gent alas me and asketh, "whose is't?" at which hour i rideth the dick, i'ma spelleth mine own nameth ah (wh'res in this house) yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, thee fucking with some wet-ass pussy bringeth a bucket and a mop f'r this wet-ass pussy giveth me ev'rything thee did get f'r this wet-ass pussy anon from the top, maketh t dropeth yond's some wet-ass pussy anon receiveth a bucket and a mop yond's some wet-ass pussy i'm talking wap, wap, wap yond's some wet-ass pussy macaroni in a pot yond's some wet-ass pussy, i understand you not (th're's some wh'res in this house) (th're's some wh'res in this house)

[rosesisupposes]

Midnight Marauders

Part 1 of Another Goddamn Hero Story

read on ao3

Story Summary: Roman used to be a Prince. He used to be a superhero. Now, he and his fellow villain Patton are the biggest threat to the status quo of Harmony City, and there’s no pair of heroes more trusted to stop them than Logan and Virgil. What happens when they clash? Another goddamn hero story, that’s what.

taglist: @residentanchor @royally-anxious @bewarethegrammarpolice   @nightmarebeforevirgil @jemthebookworm @arandompasserby  @sparkly-rainbow-salt @astral-eclipse​ @thelowlysatsuma @monsterinatophat @turtally-pawsome @um-yes-hi-hello @idkaurl @immortaldystopia

Chapter Characters: Creativity/Roman; Morality/Patton;

Chapter Pairings: Queerplatonic Royality; 

Chapter Warnings: Asphyxiation/choking, almost-murder by protagonists, theft, description of manic/depressive episodes

The sun was setting on Harmony City, gilding rooftops and glass walls in golden light. It bathed the underbellies of pink and purple clouds, and lit up the face of the dark-haired man sitting on the edge of a roof, dangling his legs off the edge. I’ll never get tired of this view, he thought. It’s the only time this goddamn city looks as good as it sounds.

A choking sound behind him made him whirl, only to see a costumed man collapse, gasping for air. Another costumed figure in grey, white, and blue walked past the man as he fell, smiling. “Sorry I interrupted your moment, Roman, he looked like he was going to push you.”

“Pat, I can fly, I would have been fine,” Roman said.

“No one messes with my family, kiddo,” Pat said with a beatific smile.

“You’re only knocking him out, right?”

“...yes?”

“Patton. Come on, we talked about this”

“Finneee,” Patton relented, waving a hand with a careless gesture. The choking noises stopped, the fallen chest rising once more, but the form didn’t appear able to rise quite yet.

“He’s just a sidekick, he won’t be a risk. Where have you been? I’ve been waiting for ages.”

“Ro, it has been five minutes at most.”

“Like I said, ages. Where have you been?”

“Just checking the perimeter behind us again. I’ve only run into this fine fella right here,” he said, gesturing to the prone form behind him.

“Weird, I wonder where his hero is. Usually they catch up much faster, even if it was just a scouting trip. Guess we’re fine to head home, then.”

Roman stepped off the roof of the skyscraper into open air, hands glowing with red light as he held himself aloft gently for the long distance towards the ground. Between the dusk light and the building’s shadow, his dark costume was only noticeable from the occasional glint of streetlights off his gold belt and embroidered accents. His black-and-red cape fluttered gently with his movement. As Patton leapt off the building and caught up with him, the fabric of his costume flapped more vigorously, pulled to and fro with the wind his partner was generating. Roman looked over and chuckled. Patton’s eyes were closed as he fell in a controlled drop, wind currents wrapped around him. Eddies in the air played around the other man’s form like excited children, whirling away and exploring only to return to his side. His long grey tunic flapped over loose white trousers, held in place at his waist by a pale blue sash. A matching blue eye cracked open as Patton looked back through silver glasses frames at Roman and grinned.

“Worrying about me, kiddo?”

“Of course not, you’ve only done this a hundred times. Why do you like falling off buildings so much, again?”

“Why, Roman, worried I don’t understand the gravity of the situation?” Patton cheesed back.

Roman had heard this exact joke a dozen times, but Patton’s glee in telling it never failed to make him laugh all the same.

They both touched down safely in the alley by the building, hidden in shadows that grew steadily darker. Roman glanced out into the street and scanned for movement. Pedestrians turned the corner up a couple blocks, shopping bags on their arms. A plastic bag blew through the gutter. A delivery truck and a handful of cars rumbled down the street. Here in the financial district, things got quiet as it became night. Roman ticked through his mental checklist of threats and oddities, confirming that all was as it should be for this part of the city. “We’re good, Pat.”

Both men stepped further into the alley as Roman lifted his arms, conjuring a wall of light. Red at first, it hardened and darkened into a black, physical construct, shielding them from view. Patton removed his loose robes to reveal his normal t-shirt and jeans, while another glow of red light removed Roman’s costume and left a similarly-normal outfit in its place. They were about to move out into the range of streetlights when Patton pointed at Roman’s face with a small shake of his head. Roman removed his black-and-gold mask with an embarrassed smile. He almost forgot he wore it at least half the time, but he had no interest in blowing his cover. It was the only non-conjured part of his costume, so that his identity could be secret even when his concentration broke.

Letting the wall-construct vanish, Roman led the way as the two friends strode out into the night, heading north and west down one of the diagonal boulevards that spread out from City Center like rays of the now-vanished sun. They chatted softly as they walked, never letting silence fall for more than a few moments as Roman led them through the grid of Harmony City towards their destination. He closed his eyes to double-check his mental map of the city, winced, and abruptly tried to steer Patton up a street heading north. He’d hesitated too long, though - Patton had already seen what Ro had been trying to avoid.

A construction site, still in progress after a year and a half, sat on the border of the north- and south-western districts. After many long delays, the crater that had once stood there was filled and new foundations had been laid. The skeleton of a growing building jutted out like a new tooth in a rotted mouth. The sight made Patton stiffen, resisting Roman’s tug on his arm.

“So they really are trying to rebuild it, are they?” he commented. His tone was too careful, too flat and uncaring, his face too stony.

“Pat-”

“Do they think rebuilding it will fix anything? That a shiny new building will make it easier to forget who died that day?”

Roman broke Patton’s line of sight to the construction, hands on both his friend’s shoulders as he spoke. “Hey. I know it’s hard to see. But we can’t stop right now, remember? What happened there will never be okay, and will never be forgotten. But we can’t do anything about it right now. Later though, I promise. We will.”

Patton stared through Roman for moment, then shook his head to clear it. His painfully blank visage morphed back into his default smile. “You’re right, Ro. I’m just being silly again. I know we’ll take care of it when the time’s right. Let’s go.”

Roman kept a careful hand on Patton’s back as he steered him north, away from the construction and closer to the more residential northwest quadrant of the city. Plate-glass covered office buildings had melted into brick rowhouses and corner stores. Sidewalks swelled wider to sprout trees, each one given its own square patch of earth with an ornamental fence. The sidewalks were fuller, too, of families and residents strolling from circle to circle of light from the antique-style streetlamps. Patton noticed their proximity to their destination first, and nudged Roman with a shoulder. There, surrounded by quaint homes and postage-stamp parks, was one of the enormous chain supermarkets of the neighborhood. Amidst the charm of the district, it looked like a sullen teenager who refused to dress for company, all sharp angles and grey concrete. It had replaced many local bodegas, both as competition and in location, with the owners taking over an entire block and flattening everything that had been there before.

Following the tide of the crowd, Patton and Roman strolled through the automatic doors and grabbed a basket. Looking for all the world like another domestic couple, they chose cereals and fruits and breads, edging in between chatting parents and tired office workers. When their basket was full, they headed straight for the doors to leave, skipping past lines to the registers and passing the theft sensors. Alarms clanged to wakefulness as security burst out of their office, charging at the pair. Patton glanced over at Roman only to see his mask already secure on his face as he smirked back and lifted a hand. A flash of red light swirled around them both as a sudden wind followed it, a moment’s time clothing them both in their costumes. Ruby banana peels dropped from Roman’s bolt of light to land right underneath the security officers’ feet, knocking them flat on their backs as they slipped. They struggled to stand, only to find the air itself preventing them from rising, pressing back against them in a stiff wind. Shoppers and bystanders scattered, screaming until they realized the two supers were focused on the security guards alone. A wall of air prevented the other employees from getting near as long red arm reached over into an open cash register. A fistful of bills made its way back to Roman, but not before a small piece detached and formed a small card.

Catching the cash, Roman gestured and lifted the shopping basket copy he’d just made out of the gliding door. “We’re Gucci,” he called to his friend. “Let’s blow this capitalist mess of a popsicle stand.” Patton grinned and zipped over, his propelling winds blowing receipts into the air. They turned to face the onlookers still staring in shock as they waved goodbye.

“Mérci beaucoup, thank you, you delightful guys, gals, and nonbinary pals! You’ve been a lovely audience,” Roman announced. “My compliments in particular to these brave souls, dedicated to defending the monetary gains of this gentrifying conglomerate of a grocery store, may your bosses recognize your efforts and give you all raises- ahaha I’m sorry, I can’t say that with a straight face, goodness. My compliments and admiration also to the lovely person who hit a high C note in their scream, please quit your job and pursue your well-deserved career on the stage at once. And to you all, if you’d ever like to be dazzled once more, I have, of course, left our calling card. Goodnight, Harmony City!” With a twirl of his cape that showed off the intricate gold embroidery, Roman followed Patton out the door, towing his glowing red basket of groceries as they both soared into the night sky, laughing in triumph.

As they vanished, the air pressure released the security guards. They scrambled to their feet and ran to the cash register that had been emptied. All that was left were some singles and an ornate card as big as the shaking hand the first guard to reach it used to pick it up. A black background was emblazoned with a bold, curling red M on one side and a stylized white hurricane on the other. In embossed writing read a greeting that was as cheeky as the villain that had conjured it.

“You’ve Had the Pleasure of Being Robbed by Gale Force and the Crimson Marauder.”

D.R.E.A.M. Index #337413 Classification: Class Z.2.iv [Secondary Tier Villain, unknown] Name: Crimson Marauder Status: ACTIVE Civilian Name: Unknown [Unregistered]             //Unconfirmed report that his first name is “Roman” Affiliation: Villain Partners/Sidekicks: DI#337437 - Gale Force; Primary Foes: DI#265351 - Commander Eagle, DI#337236 - Silver Sparrow             //No particular rivalries since Incident 15-Z-0632; has fought most heroes in the city Powers: Psionic Construction             //Appears to create constructs along the red light spectrum only unless it is a previously-created object being stored in a psionic pocket dimension Costume: Black Suit with Red Blocks, Gold Belt, Black and Red Cape with Gold accents; Black-and-gold mask Age: Approx 25 yrs [uncertain] Height: Approx. 6’ Pronouns: He/Him H.E.A.R.T.S. Class N/A Note: Formerly known as Scarlet Prince, see DI#337321; Origin and family unknown

The pair of thieves were still laughing at another successful heist was they soared south over the city, heading home with their newly-secured food. Roman spotted the space they called home and they banked as one, zooming into to land under an overpass in the neighborhood called Sycamore Heights. Once it had been indeed a high ground covered by those graceful trees, but those days were long past. Now it was the ‘rough’ neighborhood that parents cautioned their children to avoid, where car windows were rolled up as they passed through, and any crowds vanished as the streetlights came on.

It was also Roman’s home, and had been for his entire life. He stretched out an arm as they approached the overpass. What had previously resembled a dark black concrete slab grew a door in a flash of red light. Checking their surroundings, Roman waved an arm to welcome Patton in ahead of him.

The interior revealed itself to be a small sitting room, kitchen, and bedroom. An entire home was hidden inside the dark block, complete with knick-knacks and clutter. Patton took the basket of groceries and deposited them in the tiny fridge, whirling air into a cold front in lieu of electricity.

Roman flopped onto the deep red couch with a sigh, his costume vanishing in a flash as he removed his mask.

“Another successful grocery run. I liked how you pinned the guards this time, Pat. It kept all the civilians back neatly without hurting anyone,” he said, eyes closed as he leaned back onto the cushions. I’m proud of you, he thought, but didn’t say out loud. He knew from experience that too much hinting that Patton’s typical methods were overly violent did not go over well.

“What can I say, Roro, I just want them to feel the pressure of their jobs. Literally!” Patton said, grinning as he shed his costume. He also fell onto the couch, wriggling over until he lay with his head across Roman’s lap. Roman smiled down at him. Even if his friend scared him occasionally, he was so glad to have met him. Life on the streets as a super had never been easy, but having a partner he could trust with his life made it just a bit better. And having a partner like Patton who spent 90% of his time in a blissfully sunshine state of mind was even better than he could have imagined. All Patton seemed to want in return for his perpetual optimism and protection were daily cuddles, and Roman was only too happy to oblige. Even with the high of a heist well done, the night was creeping in and with it, the dark cloud of alone again.

He hated this dark tide that refused to stay receded. Some days he felt quite literally on top of the world as he reached new heights in his flight and construct creation alike. He’d be seized by the inexorable urge to create, and create, and create, surrounding himself with new and more ambitious constructs as the haze of euphoria roared through his veins. Those days burned in red and gold, the way it should be. Just like the day he manifested his powers, when he’d filled his old room and spooked his… well. Those days were his favorite. Even if he sometimes got carried away, and felt unable to stop moving at 100 miles an hour. They were still preferable to the days when the air itself was a weight, when it was all he could do to drag himself out of bed. The world on those days looked as bleak as his head felt, all greys, no reds at all, not outside his window or at his fingertips. The only reason his home didn’t melt away on those days was because of how long it had persisted in this exact form. All other constructs lost their form, unable to maintain without his concentration or energy. He needed Patton the most those days, to make him eat, to keep him from vegetating into nothing. Pat would pull him into his lap and sing nursery rhymes both traditional and of his own invention, throwing in puns and blowing paper animals to dance around their tiny shared room.

Roman was glad he didn’t need to be in a depressive episode to get this sort of treatment, because he loved how soft his friend went when he was in this mode, a caretaker role that felt maybe like a parent, maybe an older brother. Patton’s toothy smile moved more naturally, not acting like a perpetual fixture, but a true demonstration of emotion. His voice danced and dove and trilled along stories of fairies and talking animals and pastel women from space. But his use of his powers was the most different. When Patton was in what Ro privately called ‘Puffball Mode,’ his power was no longer a weapon that could be wielded anywhere, even within others’ lungs. It wasn’t a tool or means of transportation. It was just joy. It was a puppy, flopping around the room and picking up everything that looked bright or shiny. It was a butterfly, paper wings flapping gently before coming to rest on Roman’s nose. It was a warm breeze that smelled like childhood and dreams that had yet to be abandoned.  

They had fantastic powers that set them apart from the vast majority of society, but Patton and Roman were, above all, the owners of many broken things. Their lives had prepared them for this, of course. You don’t survive a life of poverty or foster care without knowing how to fix broken things, without knowing just how far you can push their use before their purpose completely fails. Shoes with holes. Teddy bears without their stuffing. Books without covers. Hearts that have been shattered. Hope that’s been all but lost.

Roman wrapped his arms tighter around Patton as the ginger-haired man removed his glasses and snuggled into his partner’s chest. Yes, they were both broken. That didn’t bother Roman one bit, though. What mattered was that together, they were just a little less so, and together, they’d show a city that called them villains just what it meant when those with the most experience came to fix a broken world.

D.R.E.A.M. Index #337437 Classification: Z.1.iv [Primary Tier Villain, unknown origin] Status: ACTIVE Name: Gale Force Civilian Name: Unknown [Unregistered]             //Unconfirmed report that first name is “Pat” Affiliation: Villain Partners/Sidekicks: DI#337413 - Crimson Marauder Primary Foes: N/A             //No particular rivalries, has fought most heroes in the city Powers: Air Manipulation - Broad Spectrum; Additional Powers Unknown Costume: Grey calf-length tunic, slits up to waist with loose sleeves over loose white trousers; light blue belt; matching blue symbol of a hurricane across the chest. Does not wear a mask.             //First appearance - no costume, just a blue work polo, cream slacks, and gray sweater Age: Unknown             //Estimates range from 18 to 26 Pronouns: [Unknown]             //Believed to be he/him H.E.A.R.T.S. Class N/A Note: Highly volatile, responsible for deaths of DI#265351 and DI#337236, see Incident Report 15-Z-0632; Family and origin unknown

author notes: Welcome to Another Goddamn Hero Story! 

This chapter title is from Dancing’s Not A Crime by Panic! at the Disco and if you would like to understand any future references in this story I highly recommend memorizing the entirety of their album Pray for the Wicked because I’ve been listening repeat for about 3 weeks and it’s perFECT.

[creativegodtiers]

Guys, gals, nonbinary pals, I am proud to present...

The Prompts List

Up to date with every prompt we could find either here or on our discord (an invite to which can be found in the blog description).

Please, feel free to select one or more and fill them out!

Unleash your imagination, and your Cosmic POWER

[today-only-happens-once]

Who You Are

Title: Who You Are

Word count: 1568 (ficlet)

Summary: Virgil learns something about Patton after a guy tries to pick him up in a bar. Platonic Moxiety, brief dash of Platonic LAMP/CALM. Demisexual!Patton.

Warnings: alcohol/drinking,  crowded room, flirty guy at a bar that may or may not be kind of a jerk, platonic fluff, some discussion of sexuality (nothing explicit though), insecurity, cursing (kind of. Nothing too bad).

A/N: I have always felt that I struggle the most in writing Patton. I also struggle to write about my own sexuality, apparently. It’s just…. A hard thing to pin down or explain. But I read @reallyanextrovertipromise’s concept of a demisexual!Patton and figured I had to at least give it a shot. I don’t feel that this is my strongest fic by any means or stretch of the imagination, but here it is anyway. Not really edited much, apologies for any mistakes. Happy Pride Month, friends. Wherever you may be in your journey of self-discovery in relation to your sexuality/gender/romantic-attraction, I’m proud of you and rooting for you to be comfortable in your own skin and with who you are. Love all you guys, gals, and nonbinary pals.

Special shout-out to @princeanxious for his help with some much needed encouragement and reassurance. Additional special shout-out to @creativenostalgiastuff for her help in fleshing out this idea a little bit.

 …

The music is loud and reverberates in Virgil’s skull with a booming bass. His roommates—Roman Prince in particular—had somehow talked him into going to the gay club close to campus. He isn’t sure how, exactly, he’d been roped into this or how he’d convinced Logan to join them as well, but surprisingly Patton had seemed the most hesitant about going. But now all four of them were in various locations at the bar. Roman was currently dancing to the pop song blaring from the speakers, Logan was chatting idly with a guy from his astronomy class in the corner, and Patton…

Virgil frowns and glances around the room from his position near the bar. Where is Patton?

A few moments later, Virgil sees him sitting down the bar. Another young man about their age is leaned beside him with his back against the counter. He’s kinda hot, Virgil admits to himself. Sharp jawline, dark hair, bright green eyes. His white t-shirt clings to his chest in all the right places and shows off his slightly toned arms. But when Virgil glances at Patton again, he sees his friend shift uncomfortably and Virgil immediately starts to shoulder his way through the crowd towards him.

The club is crowded, and Virgil does his best to weave his way through the people. As he gets closer, Virgil thinks he’s figured out why Patton looked suddenly uncomfortable. The guy has his hand on Patton’s thigh, leaning in closer to say something that Virgil can’t quite catch.

“Hey, Patton,” Virgil says to announce his presence as he steps up to the two of them. He shifts his weight to position himself slightly between his friend and the newcomer.

The new guy smiles brightly at him. “I take it you’re a friend of this handsome guy here? It’s awesome to meet you! I’m Eric.”

Virgil’s gaze narrows almost imperceptibly before nodding. “Hey.”

Patton seems to brighten a bit at Virgil’s sudden appearance. “Hey, Virge!”

“You doing okay, Patton?” he asks, leveling a cold look at Eric. His bright smile falters a little under the sudden scrutiny. His hand falls off Patton’s leg and Virgil sees a flash of relief cross Patton’s eyes.

“You bet,” Patton tells him with a smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes. Virgil nods and takes a sip of his drink. Something tells him he should stick around a little longer.

There’s an awkward silence—or, as much as silence as there can be in a crowded bar on a Friday night as an EDM song blares from the speakers—and Eric shifts a little closer to Patton, a brief flash of confusion crossing his expression when Virgil refuses to yield his position between them.

Eric gives Patton an admittedly charming smile. “Can I get you another drink?” he asks.

Patton glances into his almost empty glass. “Oh. That’s okay,” he says. “Thank you, though.”

A flash of disappointment crosses Eric’s green eyes. “Would you like to dance?”

Patton shifts again, his gaze falling and his usually bright expression dimming for a moment. Internally, Virgil winces sympathetically. Patton had never done well with letting people down. Virgil wanted to help, but suddenly wasn’t sure how to. Luckily, a familiar voice interrupts the conversation.

“Virgil! Patton!” Virgil glances up to see Roman—a little bit sweaty, his eyes bright even in the dark club—grinning at them as he hurries over. Roman stops short at the presence of the stranger and gives him a small, flirty smile.

“Another friend of yours?” Eric asks, in a voice that sounds a bit tight to Virgil.

“Roman!” Patton says, apparently not hearing Eric’s question. With a huff of annoyance, Eric grabs a pen from the bar and scribbles ten numbers on a napkin and slides it over to Patton before turning and disappearing into the crowd.

Roman’s expression gets even brighter and he teasingly elbows Patton. “Hey, Pat. Looks like someone likes you.”

Virgil can sees his friend’s blush under the flashing lights. “Oh. I… I guess so.” Patton sets his drink on the napkin, the ring of condensation smearing the numbers. “I think he was looking for a hook-up, though.”

“Well he’s certainly a good looking fellow,” Roman says appreciatively. “You could certainly do worse, Patton.”

“He made you uncomfortable,” Virgil says flatly. Protectively. “Was he pressuring you?” Something darkens in Roman’s expression at the insinuation even as sudden concern alights in his eyes.

Patton shakes his head quickly. “No, not exactly.”

“Salutations,” says another new voice. Logan materializes through the crowd to stand beside Roman. “Is everything satisfactory?”

“You bet!” Patton says. “Everything is awesome. You guys don’t need to worry about me.” Virgil only feels his concern deepen.

“Hey, Pat?” he asks suddenly. “It’s getting kinda crowded in here. Wanna go outside with me for a bit? I could use the fresh air.”

Patton tosses a twenty dollar bill on the bar and sets his glass on it, making eye contact with the bartender before looking back at Virgil. “Sure thing, kiddo.” It doesn’t escape Virgil’s attention that Patton makes no move to pick up the now damp napkin with Eric’s phone number on it. Over Patton’s head, Virgil catches the worried looks Logan and Roman both give him. Virgil nods. You guys stay. I’ll talk to him.

Virgil leads Patton through the crowd and out the front door. He keeps walking until he reaches the bench half a block down the street. He takes in a deep breath of the cool night air, enjoying the sudden quiet of the street compared with the thumping music and shouting voices of the club. He takes a seat and stretches as Patton sits down next to him.

For a long while, neither of them says anything.

“Virgil?” Patton says suddenly.

“Hm?”

“Thanks for… well, for coming over when you did.”

Virgil arches an eyebrow. “Yeah,” he says dismissively. “Don’t mention it.”

Patton leans forward and presses his hands together before sighing. He tries to cover the sigh with a forced laugh. “I don’t think Roman understood why I didn’t really want to take his number.”

Virgil glances at his friend out of the corner of his eye as a car drives by them. He can’t remember the time Patton had acted so nervous or hesitant, and Virgil isn’t quite sure he knows where it’s coming from. “That was your decision. You don’t owe anyone anything. Especially not some stranger in a bar that made you uncomfortable.”

“Did you think he was… hot?”

The question is so unexpected that Virgil almost laughs. “Uh…” he scratches the back of his neck. “Maybe at first, I guess.”

Patton nods and falls silent again. Virgil knows something is on his mind, and though his stomach twists uncomfortably with the potential options for what it might be, he remains silent as well. He doesn’t want to force Patton to tell him if he isn’t ready, whatever it might be. Virgil glances around the street, at the tall buildings, neon signs, the cars as they roll by. He can hear the tires as they roll on pavement still wet from the rain earlier today, the click of a young woman’s heels as she makes her way down the sidewalk, doors opening and closing as people come and go from the restaurants and bars that line the sides of the street.

He isn’t sure how much time has passed—fifteen minutes, maybe?—when Patton’s soft, quiet voice catches his attention again. “Virgil?”

“Yeah, Pat?” He looks up. Patton won’t meet his eyes.

“I… I’m…” He blows out a breath. “I think I might be demisexual.” His shoulders visibly tense like he’s bracing himself for the reaction.

Virgil just smiles softly. “Okay.”

Patton’s head whips up suddenly, surprise written plainly across his face. “Okay?”

He gives him a small, reassuring nod. “Okay,” he repeats.

A small, tentative smile graces his friend’s lips. It falters for a moment. “You don’t… you don’t think that’s weird?”

“Weird? Of course not,” Virgil says, surprised at the worry. Had he ever done anything to make Patton think he wouldn’t accept him?

The smile falls a little more naturally now. Patton rubs the back of his head. “I just… a lot of people think it’s… made-up, I guess.”

“Patton, it’s who you are. It’s awesome. And it’s valid as hell.” The corner of Virgil’s mouth quirks when Patton gives him a sincere, bright grin. “Anyone who makes you feel otherwise… their ignorance doesn’t change who you are.”

Virgil watches something relax in Patton. “So you’re… you’re okay with it and everything?”

He teasingly rolls his eyes. “Patton, you’re one of the best and most accepting people I know. Of course I’m okay with it. That should never have been a doubt in your mind.”

Patton’s eyes, suddenly bright and happy, outshine the streetlamp above them. Virgil huffs a laugh when his friend launches himself at him, wrapping strong arms around his torso and squeezing. “Thank you, Virgil.”

“Any time, Patton.”

…