#THIS IS SO MUCH OF ME TALKING IM SORRY

[tojisun]

sun sun! can u give me some advice? IF NOT U CAN DISCARD THIS IGNORE IT AND ILL UNDERSTAND!!!

how do u meet people and talk to ppl and go on a date or something w them? i sound like im an alien but im literally too socially anxious (im sociable and get along well w ppl, but struggle heavily with approaching), self-conscious, n inexperienced to know what to do. i wanna make new friends and potentially date someone :<

(also did u get my last message in response to ur reply? or did tumblr eat it like a poopyhead?)

my love omg i have no game whatsoever so i cant *really* help u. my confidence is the size of an apple which is already a lot for me tbh bc it has to contend with my anxiety so my days are a cesspool of “i can do this… but what if i cant” energy LMFAO 🥲

AND IM LITERALLY LIKE THAT TOO OMG like im sociable bc i get adopted by extroverts but i cant approach on my own. and if i do, i find myself having so little i can even talk about past the surface level questions :((

to add, my prev partners were all my friends so i never really had the experience of asking out people and then going on dates to see if we’re gonna work out 😭

although i started mimicking my extroverted friends! theyre not extrovert in the archetype way wherein theyre bubbly or just so energetic? but theyre so proactive in making the conversation going and cementing a bond!

since i think you and i are alike (wherein our issue lies on the approaching part), id let u know what i do instead of what they do!

i started pretending to have confidence in what i say. for example in school? my current school friend and i started hanging out bc i went up to them and went “hey, just wondering if u read the readings yet?” (and then we snowballed there teehee they did actually read it so thats cool as we were able to have a discussion about the topic but even when they didnt, i just end up steering the conversation to something ik we both know—the lecture! it was what started our friendship, but we also began to talk about other things until we were sharing our interests with each other!)

work? same thing! i start with work related topics (i work at a firm so it usually is always our clients hehehe) and then i’d invite them for coffee or lunch! im blessed to have coworkers close to my age which makes it a lot easier to poke on interests. i asked her if she’s seen this video on tiktok (it was something about that love surge couple i think) and she did so we were also able to expand our conversation out of work!

the highlight is that i bullshitted my confidence until it eventually started feeling normal :’)

im sorry that this isnt a sound advice :((

of course its still so important to stay true to yourself and im not telling u to be fake and to not be urself! but faking confidence i think is different bc, for me, its grappling with the hurdle (my anxiety) and training myself until im eventually used to it! im still not 100% the one taking the first step but when i do, im glad that i did :’)

(now for relationships… yea that i got nothing 😭 im so sorry)

but um yea! im sorry for the rambling. it just made me realize how much more work i need to put into myself too!

take care my love and i wish you the best and kindest and loveliest ever!!!

-

(i just checked and i received ur other ask!! im sorry, im kinda swamped rn so my responses have been going down the drain dhejjd but i’ll reply to it too! thank u sm for ur kindness and love <333)

[inkskinned]

you know, you know. no gods, no masters, no kings on pedestals. everyone is fallible. death of the author. you know! you are balanced about your intake of media - you allow the wiggle room, the grace, the gratitude, the skepticism. nobody above criticism.

but still. a weird gut-punch feeling, something akin to betrayal. you read the article. surprise! an author you love is actually: a serial fucking predator.

well, shit. what now. no, you knew he was a person (all people are), but now you're wondering - what have i overlooked by accident? what messages have i internalized that are strange and cruel? and also, like, what the fuck?

his actions lay a thick glaze on top of everything. like each place is now ruined, opaque in a new way. but okay, fine, you've done this before. you knew better, right? you've been betrayed by many a cherished childhood author.

still, this stickiness. fuck. can you pick up that book again. will you read it to your children. you've recommended it to others - will you ever do that again? and of course, of course, no parasocial relationships. you were theoretically above this kind of sentiment. but the artist informs the art, right.

so it's not something as clear-cut as feeling he owed you, specifically (a stranger) better behavior - just that you kind of, in a distant and odd way... sort of trusted him to do better. it's not like a real trust or something speakable, just the faint hope that the product (good books) was a thin representation of the soul. now it feels like the product (good? books?) was a mask. in some small or insignificant way, your previous support of this person lent them power. your money and your time and your laughter.

and the thing is - you have this terrible, echoing sensation. how many times will this happen? over and over. you find out that the singer you love is actually a predator. you learn over drinks that your favorite high school english teacher is in jail for what he did to her. you listen to the news idly and suddenly discover that a woman you used to idolize has been abusing her kids for an actual eon.

what can you touch without the static melting off. you can't even really complain about it too much (you were supposed to know better, and besides, you don't want the same re-split "it's not your fault, love what you love" basic advice), but now it's here. somehow, it feels like - you let him into your life.

it's not that things need to be pure or an artist has to be like, endlessly perfect, mindful. demure. it's more just this terrible truth that has been replayed through your veins so often it feels criminally vain. power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely. did you want any one person to be worth that power?

it's just that he wrote books where he seemed to understand that. he seemed to know about hierarchies and unfair systems and bigotry and privilege. you thought they were books about what it means to struggle. you thought they were about having power and still using it for good rather than for control. he spooned you a narrative of being a good guy, a kind soul. you fucking bought what that fucking monster sold.

maybe that's why they were fantasies, after all.

[hinamie]

corvidae

[crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington]

multishipping

[scamperin-shroom]

Classic Zelda games: "So Link doesn't talk because he's meant to resemble you the player 🥰"

Echoes of Wisdom: "Link doesn't talk because his ability to speak was physically taken from him by a dark force"

(edit: since I need people to understand Link can't talk at all. It was forced out of him. It's not a choice. That part of him was consumed)

[stiffyck]

I WISH ARO HEADCANONS WERE MORE POPULAR IN FANDOMS

[skunkes]

[iooiu]

good to know all casey jones’ are the same

[napping-sapphic]

Good luck trying to casually cuddle with me if we date we’d lay down and get nice and cozy and then i would fall asleep in two seconds flat and trap you for four hours

[boygirlctommy]

i love the bit from oct 17 2020 when tommy and quackity trapped wilbur in a cobblestone box to keep him from pressing the button... wilbur punching through the blocks with his bare hand to try to get to the button... tommy frantically replacing the block in front of him yelling for quackity to do something... the moment when tommy stops, blocks the exit, and tells wilbur to do it. press the button. but then theyd die with him. quackitys like "wait, wait-" but tommy holds his ground and wilbur. ohh wilbur. "why'd you have to make it so hard?"

[babybinko]

A job will have you 50 with a 25 year old best friend like "damn where tf Goro at today??" 😂😂😂

[hinamie]

binding vow

[howlonomy]

Monster Clover, like this is so awesomecool.

They're such a little beast and it is amazing and please i need more, like written text even i just need the juicy lore and emotional moments that are circling in ur brain.

HAT: RETRIEVED!!

[lemongogo]

they should get to kill each other at least twice .i think

[crows-of-buckets]

Rook: I'm really worried about Davrin and Lucanis, they keep arguing with one another... Its very bad Varric, what if it effects them in battle?

Varric, remembering that one time Fenris broke Ander's nose then took a knife in the back for him in the same night: I'm sure they'll be fine kid. They're barely even arguing if you ask me

[ratatatastic]

vanha kauppahalli date but the dessert edition aka the more enjoyable edition if not because sasha has a sweet tooth so we can like these foods freely

sasha in the midst of eating merengue and almost choking to death because he thinks any comment out of maffhews mouth is funny maffhew sweetheart we have to think about the effect we have on the people around us for a single second here