#THE WAY I'D LET THIS MAN BE MY MASTER
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WONWOO AS A VAMPIRE AJDNKAJDIANSKAJSIAJ

twisted fate
đ staring. Wonwoo x afab!Reader
đź preview. âHe deserved it,â Wonwoo assures you, reaching out to grab you by the back of the neck, pulling you closer. Heâs covered in blood, and he looks like a sexy, wild monster. But heâs your monster, and you canât help but react, leaning in- âJesus Christ,â you hear Jeonghan breathe, turning to give you and Wonwoo privacy while he presses his lips against yours hungrily. At first, you can try to ignore the wet liquid on your fingertips as you grab at his strong shoulders, but you canât ignore the taste on his tongue. Your body goes rigid and Wonwoo pulls back with a sigh, resting his forehead against yours. Itâs an oddly peaceful moment amongst the chaos.
tw/cw. murder/blood, dickhead vampire wonwoo, yandere subthemes, kidnapping?, biting, blood play, throat grabbing, manhandling, begging, controlling!wonwoo, praise, dirty talk, fingering, mean dom Wonwoo, multiple reader orgasms, finger-licking, choking, unprotected sex, big dick Wonwoo, size kink, slight dacryphilia, gentle spanking, dumbification, begging, hair pulling, etc⊠I pet names: (hers) darling, brat, pet, etc.
đč rating. 18+ explicit I wc. 14.3k
đ aus. vampire/vampire hunter au, soulmate au, enemies to lovers, etcâŠ
âïžÂ mlist + an. I guess for October I just put out bangers, this one has a lot of blood play cuz it's vampire wonwoo, so be warned
Thereâs something different about you, and Wonwoo notices the moment you step into the bar. He has his fair share of experience with places that cater to vampires, and after over a hundred years, he knows how to spot humans with an interest in his kind. Many of the women swarming around him have a certain look in their eye, their pulses racing with excitement, but you⊠well, thereâs something off about the way you hold yourself.
You certainly look the part of a fang bunny, your attire all black, but youâre dressed much more conservatively than the lingerie clad girls that normally frequent this place. Still, even with your form half hidden under a leather jacket, Wonwoo can tell he likes what he sees of you.Â
Some of his friends like the hunt. They have big egos and take pleasure in chasing their food down, but Wonwoo doesnât share in this thirst for a conquest. He wonât approach you, heâll simply watch. It will be amusing to see what you end up doing tonight if nothing else.
His eyes follow you as you head to the bar, leaning over the counter to talk with one of the human workers. From a distance, and with the bar practically full of noise, Wonwoo canât make out your words, but that doesnât really matter to him. Youâre interesting enough to watch, but Wonwooâs not sure heâd actually care for anything you have to say, especially not when he can stare at your ass instead.
The discussion is a short one, and Wonwoo catches the bartender nodding in his direction. This is new behaviour, but the vampire supposes he shouldnât be shocked at the loose lipped humans who work here. No one keeps a secret like a vampire, and as Wonwoo watches you slip a bill over the counter, heâs filled with annoyance at the money hunger of mere mortals.
You slip into the crowd again, and itâs clear youâre making your way over toward the elevated section of the club, where Wonwoo sits at a table drinking what appears to be red wine with two of his broodmates.Â
âWho are you watching?â Mingyu asks, leaning forward to get a better look.Â
âNo one important,â Wonwoo responds smoothly, swirling the blood in his wine glass before downing it. Heâs curious as to what will happen next, and if you are coming over in the hopes of being bitten, he wants to be satiated enough to not give into the temptation of draining you.Â
Vampire bars generally have a strict no killing policy. The underworld has few sanctuaries like this one, and they canât have human law enforcement going through their âwine barrelsâ if a murder takes place in or around the property.Â
Wonwooâs eyes find you again. Youâre much closer now, and your gaze is fixed on him. Youâre like a cute little butterfly heading straight for the spiderâs web, and it makes Wonwoo grin to himself.Â
He stands up from the booth when youâre a few feet away, and Wonwoo notes your pulse quicken, your steps faltering. To your credit, Wonwoo is much larger now than when he was sitting, and he has to lower his gaze to meet your own. âAre you lost?â he asks, taking in your outfit at a leisurely pace now that youâre right in front of him.
âNo, I-â You take a breath. âAre you Wonwoo?â
âDepends whoâs asking,â he muses.
âIâve been looking for you,â you try to explain, raising your voice over the noise of the bar.Â
Wonwoo can hear you perfectly fine, but he knows the noise must be difficult on your weak human ears. He leans forward. âSounds interesting. Letâs step outside to talk, itâs too loud in here.â
He watches the way you pause, considering the proposition.
Youâre definitely not a fang bunny. Any vampire lover would jump at the chance to get alone with him. Youâre much too guarded, and it intrigues him even more.
âOkay,â you nod.Â
Wonwoo steps closer, hand finding the small of your back as he begins to guide you through the club toward the back exit. You stiffen under his touch, and Wonwooâs fingers skim over the hilt of what he presumes to be a blade under your leather jacket.
He wonders how you got in with a badly concealed weapon, but he supposes the human bouncers can be just as susceptible to bribery as bartenders can. Heâll have to talk with the club owner about hiring vampire security, even if such jobs are âbelowâ his kind.Â
Your heart rate is increasing with each step, but youâre doing your best to breathe evenly, and Wonwoo is amused by it. Either you know heâs a vampire, in which case, you should know you canât fool him, or, maybe youâre just stupid, he canât quite tell.
Wonwooâs heart doesnât beat. It hasnât in too many years to count, but he gets that familiar tingle of excitement running along his skin as he gets closer to the door that will lead you behind the bar. Youâre not a sure catch, not what Mingyu would fondly call a âcute juicebox.â Wonwooâs always been curious, and his interest is peaked by the unknown outcome of this interaction.
As you make it to the exit, Wonwoo holds the door open for you. With one last pause, you walk through.Â
The vampire grins to himself, following you into the night.
The alleyway is deserted, the perfect spot for Wonwoo to figure you out.Â
His eyes follow you as you put a few feet of distance between him and yourself, running an anxious hand through your hair.Â
âYou were just about to tell me why youâre looking for me,â Wonwoo says, pretending to be helpful, when in reality, he only wants to satiate his own curiosity.  Â
âI heard you might know someone Iâve been trying to find, a Mister Sung.â
Wonwooâs throat tightens. He hasnât heard his makerâs name in many years. It frustrates him that it still has an effect on him, and Wonwooâs fist clenches at his side. âI donât know anyone by that name,â he lies.Â
âIâve been told you do,â you insist.
Heâs tired of you now, anger growing by the second inside of him.
âI donât know anyone by that name,â Wonwoo repeats, unable to say the name in question. He refuses to taste it on his lips again, and he can feel his fangs beginning to throb, his need to taste something sweeter growing as he stares you down.Â
You begin to reach for your jacket, but youâre much too slow for the older vampire, who immediately catches your wrist in a vice grip.Â
âDonât grab your weapon,â he warns. âIt will only make me harder on you.â
Your pulse is racing now. Wonwoo can see your carotid artery leaping against your skin. He holds back a groan, stepping closer.Â
You move away, back hitting the brick wall behind you.
âNowhere to run,â Wonwoo muses. âYouâre a vampire hunter, arenât you, darling? Shame. Iâve never seen a hunter move as slow as you do. But I guess these days there arenât many people who could teach you the craft, Iâve killed my share of them.â
Your pupils dilate with fear, and it makes Wonwooâs head spin. Heâs going to enjoy this.Â
The club might have a no killing humans policy, but vampire hunters are free game. Heâll be doing everyone a favour, and get his fill while doing it.Â
âStop-â You gasp, struggling against his grip, but Wonwooâs hands might as well be metal, as thereâs no way youâre breaking free of him.
Heâs grown tired of this. As a curious human who may have walked into the wrong bar, youâd been interesting, but as a vampire hunter with no skill, you mean nothing to him.Â
Heâs amused when you try to punch at him with your free hand, but that only leads to him grabbing it and pinning it with your other wrist, squeezing you tight enough to have you gasping again.Â
With both your wrists captured in one hand, heâs free to bring the other to your face, pinching your jaw. âDonât scream,â he warns you, âand donât struggle, youâll only make things worse.â
Wonwooâs gotten accustomed to staring into a personâs eyes as they realize theyâve just met death himself, and heâll never get tired of it. He licks his lips, able to taste your fear in the cold night air. His self control has worn thin, but Wonwooâs never been the type to hold himself back from an easy kill.Â
With one sharp motion, he pushes your head to the side, giving him full access to your neck. Your artery leaps, pressing against your skin, and Wonwoo lets out a groan of relief as he dives in, sharp fangs piercing you.
You release a muffled gasp, clawing at his forearm while you struggle against the wall. The taste that erupts across his tongue is unlike anything heâs ever had before. Itâs rich like fine red wine, but thereâs something else too, dark notes of cherry and pomegranate-Â
Suddenly, it feels like Wonwooâs been roughly punched in the chest. Itâs so startling that he pulls away from you, staggering back in confusion and releasing your wrists. Clearly you didnât punch him, so what was that-
You take the moment of confusion to whip your blade out of your jacket, holding one hand to your bleeding neck while you defend yourself with the other. âStay back!âÂ
But Wonwoo canât stay back, not now that youâre more intriguing than ever.
He stands, licking his lips. He can still taste you on his tongue, and itâs practically intoxicating.Â
Wonwooâs eyes shift to the weapon youâre holding. Itâs a black, triple bladed knife, used by vampire hunters and meant to emulate a stake. One good stab from that and thereâs no stitching it up, heâd be scarred forever, even with vampiric healing abilities. And if you actually hit his heart? Heâd simply be gone.
Maybe you have more bite than heâd given you credit for, but Wonwoo knows he can still best you in a fight, heâll just have to be a little more careful.
âI swear to God-â you warn him, waving the blade.
âDarling, thereâs no God here,â Wonwoo tells you simply, eyes assessing your every motion. Itâs clear which side of your body you favour, and with one hand still pressed to your bleeding neck, he has an easy opening.
When Wonwoo moves to the left, you turn your body to follow, and thatâs all he needs to abuse your weak point. With lightning fast speed, Wonwoo gives your abdomen a rough push, sending you careening back to the wall. Thereâs a harsh crack as your head hits brick, and you crumple to the ground, blade falling from your hand.
Maybe heâd pushed you too hard- he hadnât been trying to- but he can still hear your faint breaths. Youâre alive, and you might not be that way for long.
Wonwoo has never, in all his years of living, given another being his blood. Heâs never wished to. But staring down at you now, that all changes. He can hear your pulse getting weaker-
The vampire falls to his knees next to you, grabbing you by the back of your neck and pulling you closer. He brings his other wrist to his mouth, biting deep before holding it over your parted lips.Â
 Wonwoo watches the dark red substance speckle your tongue and he presses two fingers under your jaw, closing your mouth in the hopes it will help you swallow. His wrist wound is already healing, and soon, youâll heal as well.
Thereâs no medicine in the world quite like vampire blood, especially the blood of one as old as he. Wonwoo knows this. However, thereâs still something inside of him that begins to worry about you. Itâs a foreign emotion, worry, one heâs not had to deal with in a while, especially not in regard to a human.
Wonwoo grabs your blade off the ground, tucking it into his belt, then he adjusts you in his arms. Itâs easier to simply throw you over his shoulder, so thatâs what he does, standing up and looking toward the mouth of the alleyway. He canât risk any humans seeing this, so he pulls out his phone, calling Mingyu.
âBring the car to the back of the club,â Wonwoo instructs, leaving no room for argument as he hangs up.Â
Less than two minutes later, Mingyuâs familiar black jeep is rolling down the alleyway. The car comes to a stop and Mingyu exits it, staring at Wonwoo in shock. âWhat happened?â
âVampire hunter,â Wonwoo says simply, opening the door to the back of the jeep to set you inside.Â
âWhat are you going to do with her?â Mingyu asks, watching through the rearview mirror as Wonwoo gets in beside you.
The elder vampire is quiet for a long while. âIâm not sure.â
Wonwoo is sitting in a chair near the bed, playing with your knife and watching over you diligently. It takes hours before you finally begin to stir. When you wake, you bolt upright, gasping. Your hand flies to your neck, but the wounds are already closed, your skin washed away of blood.
Your eyes find him next, and Wonwoo canât help but be amused by the way you react, cowering away from him.
âSo sleeping beauty finally wakes up,â Wonwoo muses, tossing the blade in his hand and catching it by the hilt.
You donât say anything, but Wonwoo can see the cogs turning in your mind. âWhy⊠why am I alive?â
âThatâs a good question,â one he doesnât know the answer to yet.Â
âAm I a vampire?âÂ
Now Wonwoo is laughing. âNo. Can you feel your heart racing? Itâs a sign that youâre still human.â
You shift in his sheets. âWhat are you going to do to me?â
âIâm not sure yet,â he confesses. âFirst, Iâd like some answers.â
âIâm not telling you anything.â
âThen Iâll tell you what I know,â he suggests. âThis symbol on your blade, itâs a family crest. You belong to a line of vampire hunters.â You stay quiet, but to be fair, it hadnât been a question, not really. âI recougnize this particular crest. Itâs odd to see it again after so many years. I thought your line had been wiped out, but youâre still here, so I guess not.â
âJust kill me,â you state.
Your words cause an interesting feeling to bloom through Wonwooâs chest again, and he cocks his head. âIs that really what you want?â
You bite your lip, then let out a heavy sigh. âNo.â
The vampire stands from his chair. âAt least I know why you were looking for Mister Sung now,â he says. âHe killed your family, didnât he?â
You stay quiet, but Wonwoo notes the small tremble that erupts through your form and itâs confirmation enough.Â
âIf itâs any consolation,â Wonwoo continues, âthe vampire youâre looking for is dead. I killed him. Ten years ago.â
âHeâs dead?â you ask, clearly shocked.
âIt seems youâve been running a fool's errand, darling,â Wonwoo clicks his tongue. âAnd you nearly died for it. I donât think your parents would be too happy with you.â
Itâs a low blow, and it causes a reaction. Your fists bunch in the sheets and your eyes narrow. âWhat do you know about my parents?â you spit.Â
âI know they never got a chance to train you properly. I bet youâve never even killed a vampire.â
Your shoulders slump ever so slightly and Wonwoo knows heâs hit the nail on the head.
âA vampire hunter with no kills under her belt,â Wonwoo laughs, âitâs cute you thought you could actually get me to be your first.â
âIf you have everything figured out, what do you still need me for?â
âThereâs still one thing Iâm stuck on,â Wonwoo admits. âYou did something to me, when I bit you. There was this⊠feeling, in my chest.â
âI didnât do anything to you.â
He studies you for a moment. Itâs true he hadnât found any vampire repellents on you when heâd brought you back to his home. Heâd kind of been hoping youâd tell him youâre a witch, and in a last ditch effort to get him away from you in the alley youâd used a spell of some sort.Â
Wonwoo doesnât want to consider the other possibility, heâs been refusing to even think about it, but now that the witch angle is off the table, the worst case scenario is at the forefront of his thoughts.
âIâve got business to attend to,â he tells you simply, heading to the door. âYouâll be locked in this room until I figure out what Iâm going to do with you.â
âAnd when will that be?!â
Wonwoo can hear the panic in your voice, and in some form he can sympathize with it. Heâd been kept in a room for many years, under the command of a vampire sire heâd since revenged upon. âNot long,â Wonwoo promises, and itâs the most he can give you as reprieve before he shuts you into your fate.
âWhatâs so important we couldnât do this over the phone or at the club?â Jeonghan asks as Wonwoo pushes into his home.Â
âGive me a minute,â Wonwoo says, double-checking his friend's apartment for any fang bunnies or other vampires who could take what heâs about to say and use it against him.
âYouâre so paranoid,â Jeonghan rolls his eyes. âYou wanted us to be alone, so weâre alone.â
Wonwoo turns to face the vampire in front of him. âTell me about Luna.âÂ
âYou-â Jeonghan falters. âYou never want to hear about Luna.â
âBut I do now,â Wonwoo insists. âTell me.â
Jeonghan moves to sit on his couch, and Wonwoo can tell that the mere name of Jeonghanâs lost love is nearly too much for him to handle, even after so many years.
âWhat do you want to know?â Jeonghan asks finally.
âYou said she was your soulmate.â
âAnd you called me crazy for it, everyone did.â Perhaps this is another reason itâs such a sore subject.Â
âNot everyone,â Wonwoo points out. âSung didnât like it.âÂ
Jeonghan visibly flinches at the name of their old master, and itâs no wonder why. Sung had gone after anything his fledglings found beautiful, and much more. Itâs one of the many reasons Wonwoo had found a way to kill him, ending their eternal torment⊠but heâd been too late to save Luna, and itâs something heâs always regretted. Jeonghan is a shell of who he was before, and deep in Wonwooâs black twisted soul, he knows that the man he used to call one of his closest friends will never truly be whole again.Â
âShe was my soulmate,â Jeonghan says, but at this point, it almost sounds like heâs trying to convince himself of that fact.
âHow did you know?â Wonwoo presses.
âIt was a feeling, I canât really explain it.â
âTry.âÂ
Jeonghan lets out a deep sigh. âThere was something about Luna, I knew it the moment I first saw her. I couldnât describe it, especially not to any other vampires. She wasnât just prey, she was more than that.â
She was enough for Jeonghan to turn her into a vampire, intent on spending the rest of eternity with her, an eternity that never came, for one of them at least.
âThe first time I tasted her,â Jeonghan runs a hand through his hair. âShe was like citrus and sunshine, Iâd never experienced anything like her.â This is far off from the red wine and pomegranates Wonwoo had tasted when heâd had you. âIt was the oddest thing- there was this feeling, in my chest-â
âLike a punch,â Wonwoo suggests.
Jeonghanâs eyes shift to him, and then he nods. âYeah, like a punch.â
Wonwoo almost feels sick. âI still donât understand how this made you realize she was your soulmate.â
âI couldnât hurt her,â Jeonghan explains, âeven if Iâd wanted to. And when I tasted her again, when she let me drink from her, I realized what the feeling in my chest was.â
âWhat was it?âÂ
Jeonghan studies Wonwoo. âIt was my heart.â
âYour heart?âÂ
The long haired vampire nods. âAn echo. A memory of the life I once had. Luna made my heart beat again, if only when I was with her. She made me soft, like Iâd been when I was human, before Sung and the eternal night.â
Wonwoo sits on the couch across from Jeonghan, looking down at his hands.
This canât be true. Wonwoo had never believed it before- but now, well, now heâs experienced it for himself.Â
How can a vampireâs whole long life change in one chance meeting?
Except, it hadnât been chance, not really. Sung had ruined your life as heâd ruined Wonwooâs, and fate had inexplicably tied you together.Â
He truly canât believe it.
âWhy do you want to know all of this?â Jeonghan asks.
Wonwoo almost doesnât want to admit it, for Jeonghanâs sake as much as his own. So he lies. âNo reason.â
Jeonghan leans back, crossing his arms over his chest. âDonât tell me youâve found your own soulmate.â When Wonwoo remains silent, Jeonghan lets out a small laugh. âI feel sorry for any human unlucky enough to be tied to you.â
âI do too,â Wonwoo sighs. His indifference - and sometimes hatred - towards humans is well known in the vampire circles Wonwoo is a part of. Heâs generally cold, unfeeling, a true vampire, the way his master made him. In fact, out of all twelve of Wonwooâs broodmates, heâs likely the most successful by Sungâs measurements. Heâd surely been the most strategically blood thirsty, and it had cost their former master his life.Â
âYou wonât be able to kill her,â Jeonghan warns. âWonât be able to run away. If youâve tasted her blood, if youâve felt your heart, itâs only a matter of time until you give in again.â
Wonwoo hates that this is true. Youâve been on his mind the entire time heâs been away from you, and itâs already driving him insane. Heâs not used to thinking about another being for long periods of time, least of all a filthy little human who fancies herself a vampire hunter.
âYouâll end up turning her,â Jeonghan concludes. âItâs the only way. Humans are fragile, and I know how much you hate to see weakness.â
Youâve been trying to find a way out of the bedroom for ages. There are no clocks, nothing to tell you what time it is, but you know dawn is coming, you can see it through the large windows that make up an entire wall of the room.
Thereâs safety in sunshine, and youâre extremely hopeful that it comes before Wonwoo does.
But your luck is not your own today, as you hear something outside the door just as the morning rays begin to creep through the glass.Â
You make your way to the windows, pressing your body against them and waiting for the vampire to return. He takes his sweet time, and for that, youâre grateful. The room is half illuminated by the time Wonwoo opens the door, and he peers inside at you.
âWhat are you doing?â he asks, studying your seated form, back to the glass and morning sun.
âProtecting myself,â you fire back.
Wonwoo lets out a laugh, looking down where the sun reaches on the floor. Then, he steps into it. âDo you really think Iâd have a room without tinted glass? The sunlight canât touch me here. This is my safe haven, not yours.âÂ
Fuck.
âHave you decided what youâre going to do with me?â you ask, feeling defeated.
âIâll let you know when I do,â Wonwoo responds smoothly, walking over to the closet.Â
Heâs left the door wide open, and you eye it, wondering if you can make your escape.
âDonât even think about it,â the vampire warns. âYou wonât get far. Iâve installed an extra lock on my front door too, so even if you make it there, you have no way out.â
âHow many people have you killed here?â
âNone.â Wonwoo is looking through his clothing casually, back to you. Youâre not sure if you can believe him. âGo on, check the doors.â
You dart from the room, quickly getting your bearings in the small but luxurious apartment. When you make it to the front door, you find heâs not lying. Thereâs an extra deadbolt on it, and try as you might, you canât get it open.
You move to the kitchen next, looking for knives of any kind- but thereâs literally nothing to be found in any of the cabinets. You suppose a vampire has no use for utensils or food-Â
Instead, you unplug a lamp, picking it up to use as a bludgeoning weapon if the need arises. You stare toward Wonwooâs bedroom, and he crosses your line of sight. Heâs shirtless now, a pair of sweatpants low on his hips.
The sight is gone far too soon, and you wait, frozen with your lamp.Â
Wonwoo doesnât say anything. He doesnât come out of his room.
After a few minutes, you go to peek inside. The vampire is laying in his bed.
âWhat are you doing?â
âTrying to sleep,â he muses almost lazily. âItâs been a long night.â
Youâd heard rumours about vampires needing sleep, but you hadnât actually believed the tales.Â
âWhat am I supposed to do now?â you ask.
âGet comfortable,â Wonwoo sighs. âYouâre not going anywhere.â He opens his eyes when you stay standing in his doorway. âPut the lamp down.â
âNo.â
The vampire lets out a laugh. âSuit yourself.â
âIâll kill you in your sleep,â you warn him.
âNo you wonât.â Wonwoo rolls onto his side, facing away from you. The covers are around his hips, and you get a good view of his excessively broad shoulders. His skin is perfect, not a blemish in sight, only muscles for days.
You lower the lamp a little.Â
This man is crazy. Absolutely batshit insane.Â
You watch the vampire as he drifts to sleep, and as soon as you feel youâve waited a substantial amount of time, you begin to tiptoe to his closet. Your blade has to be somewhere.
Youâre hyper aware of the fact that at any moment, Wonwoo could wake up. You keep your noise level to a minimum, rifling through his things. Finally, after what feels like forever, you feel the tip of your blade under your fingers as you look through a folded pile of hoodies.Â
The twisted knife pulls out from the fabric and you have to fight the urge to cry out in happiness. When you look over your shoulder, you find the vampire still asleep. Heâs on his back now, and it would be the perfect opportunity to stake him.
Youâre aware that if you kill him, it will be much harder to leave the apartment, but youâre confident that if you bang on the front door long and loudly enough, someone will come save you.Â
You begin to tiptoe toward the bed, adjusting your grip on the knife.Â
If thereâs one thing you can say about vampires in general, itâs that theyâre beautiful. Wonwoo looks absolutely angelic, even while asleep. You falter at the edge of the mattress, simply watching him. If he hadnât nearly killed you last night, you might hesitate longer, but the memory brings your drive back, and you hold the blade over his chest.
But your hands canât bring it down. You canât pierce his skin the way heâd pierced your neck just hours ago.
Come on, you think to yourself. Just stake him.Â
Wonwooâs eyes open, and he simply stares at you for a moment. Then he grabs your hand, disarming the blade and tugging you roughly, sending you toppling onto the mattress next to him.Â
âFuck!â you scream, kicking and trashing against the vice grip he has on your wrist.
Wonwoo lets you go. âI would have been disappointed if you didnât try.â
âI hate you!â you yell, sitting up only to be tugged back down again.
âNo, you donât.â Wonwoo straddles you this time, grabbing both your wrists and pinning them above your head with one hand while the other continues to hold your family blade.Â
âI do!â
âI killed the vampire you were hunting, something you would have never been able to do. Some part of you must be grateful for that at least,â Wonwoo points out. âIâve saved you from becoming a killer. Trust me, itâs not a weight youâd be able to hold easily.â
His words make your skin cold, and you stop wiggling beneath him, staring up at the beautiful vampire.
âThere we go,â Wonwoo says, tone almost soothing. âIf youâre good and calm, Iâll give you some information. Although, you wonât like what youâre about to hear.â
âHave you decided to kill me yet?âÂ
Wonwoo quickly shakes his head, releasing your wrists so he can sit straighter, staring down at your form. âIâm not really sure how to tell you this.â
âJust spit it out!â
âImpatient little thing, arenât you?â Wonwoo grins, tracing the tip of the blade across your collar bone and making you freeze. Youâre breathing heavily, fighting every urge to try to push him off of you. âFine, maybe I wonât tell you.â
He gets off of you, rolling onto his back again. He begins to play with the knife, gently tracing one of its edges.
âTell me,â you press. âIâm being good.âÂ
Wonwoo laughs, and you hate how attracted you are to him when he smiles, his fangs all pointy and sharp.Â
âFate is like this blade,â he says finally.
âA killer?â you suggest after a moment of deliberation.
âTwisted,â Wonwoo corrects you.Â
âTwisted how?â
âSung. He ruined my life. Ruined yours. I killed him, thinking I knew everything there was to know, but there was still information he could have given me. Information that died with him, like the vampire hunter legacy that died with your parents. Now here we are, two remnants of the same past, our souls scarred, but entwined, twisted by fate.â
Youâd definitely not pegged this vampire as a poet, but thereâs something very genuine about the words leaving his pretty lips.
âWhat do you know of souls?â you ask, words dripping with vitriol. âYou donât have one.â
âIt would appear I do,â Wonwoo muses.Â
âThen what do you know about mine?âÂ
âEnough.âÂ
Heâs told you something without telling you anything, and itâs infuriating.
âWhen I bit you, I felt something,â Wonwoo says quietly.
âBesides hunger?â
He grins at your sarcasm. âYes, besides hunger.â
Wonwoo drags his finger across the blade again, but this time, it cuts him. You watch dark red blood bloom, and after a moment he brings it to his lips, licking it clean. By the time he pulls his hand away, you see the small cut has healed.
âWhen I bit you, my chest hurt.â
âWhat does that mean?âÂ
âI wasnât sure at the time,â he admits. âBut I know someone whoâd felt something similar, so I went to talk to him. Do you want to know what he said?â
The anticipation is nearly killing you. âYes.âÂ
âHe revealed to me that amidst a world of vampires, witches and werewolves, thereâs also such a thing as soulmates. And so, like this blade, fate is twisted.âÂ
You stare at the vampire, trying to process what heâs just said.Â
But it doesnât make sense to you.
âYou canât be saying that weâre soulmates-â
âThatâs exactly what Iâm saying.â Wonwoo shifts, holding the blade out to you. âHere, try to stake me again.â
After a moment of deliberation, you take the knife, lining it up with his throat. But try as you might, you canât bring yourself to kill him, canât even cut a tiny scratch against his perfect skin.
âThis doesnât prove anything,â you say finally, feeling completely defeated.
âSure it doesnât,â Wonwoo grins, but his smile tells you another story. âNow, if you donât mind, Iâd like to go back to sleep. Youâre free to join me if you want.â
You take the knife away from his neck, releasing a loud sigh. âJust donât bite me.â
âNo promises.â Wonwoo rolls on his side again, back to you.Â
You hate how calm heâs being about all of this, but you suppose thatâs what happens when youâre the one holding all the cards.Â
You canât hurt him, but youâre pretty sure he can still hurt you, if that bite from last night is anything to go on.Â
It takes an hour of letting him rest before you finally place the knife on the floor, settling into the bed with a huff. Your mind is completely full, but youâre exhausted too. Sleep finds you soon thereafter.Â
You wake up cold, and it only takes a moment for you to realize why. Thereâs a vampire attached to your back, his chest pressed tightly to your form, skin like ice.Â
You want to pull away, but you canât. Youâre stuck, trapped in his tight embrace.Â
There has to be a way out of this, not only his arms but his apartment too. Youâll find a way, there has to be a way-Â
With a few deep breaths, youâre finally able to get control of yourself, and you begin to shift away from Wonwoo- only for his grip to tighten on your body.Â
âWhere do you think youâre going?â he asks, voice groggy as if heâs just woken up.
âI have to get out of here,â you insist.
Wonwoo releases his hold on you, and you dart out of bed, looking around at the dark of the room. Itâs evening already? How long did you sleep? When you look outside, you see the sun has set, the sky a hazy purple.Â
âPeople will look for me,â you say, trying to reassure yourself.
âWhat people? Your family is dead.âÂ
Heâs such an asshole. He canât possibly be your soulmate, he canât be-
You turn to look at Wonwoo, only to find him standing right in front of you. Heâs so large, his chest perfectly muscled- and heâs staring at your neck.
âDonât even think about it,â you warn, clapping both hands over your throat.
He laughs. âBut Iâm thirsty.â
âHow very enticing,â you say sarcastically.Â
âIâve been thinking.â
âYou have?â you act shocked, picking up your blade.
âPut that down,â he tells you. âIâve been thinking about something my friend told me. He said Iâd have to turn you eventually.â
âNow Iâm definitely not putting this down!â You brandish the knife at him and it only makes his grin wider.Â
âYouâre cute,â the vampire muses. âI canât let you leave here while youâre human. Itâs a dangerous world out there. Turning you would give me⊠security.â
âIâd still run,â you insist.
âYou wouldnât be able to. Not if I told you that you canât.â
âIâd still try-â
Wonwoo bats the blade out of your hand, grabbing your wrists to pin them to your front while he steps closer. âYouâre not listening,â he tuts. âFledgelings canât disobey their masters, and if I turned you-â
âYouâll never be my master,â you spit.Â
âYou might not like me now, but youâll get over it,â Wonwoo assures you. âI canât say Iâm particularly fond of the fragility of your human body. I can turn you and youâll be much more powerful. Youâll stay beautiful and young, forever.â
Blood is thrumming through your body, and so is fear. Your pulse is practically racing as you stare up at the vampire who thinks youâre his soulmate.Â
How can he be so sure of this?
In the dark recesses of your mind, thereâs some pleasure in being wanted, maybe even needed- but you push the thought away, struggling in his grasp. âDonât do this.â
Wonwoo doesnât respond, he simply steps closer, causing you to move back until youâre pressed between him and the wall. He stares down at you, an intensity in his eyes.Â
âIâm going to ask you something, and Iâll be able to tell if youâre lying, so be a good girl and try to be honest, okay?âÂ
âScrew you!â
He places both your wrists in one hand, bringing the other up to cup your cheek. âWould you hate me if I kissed you?â
âYes!âÂ
âLie,â he grins, leaning even closer. âTell me you donât want me to kiss you.â
âI donât want you to kiss me.â
âAnother lie. Your heart jumped just now. Whether you want to admit it to yourself or not, your body always tells the truth.âÂ
Youâre speechless, staring up at him with wide eyes.
âIâm going to kiss you now,â the vampire warns you. âIt will be better if you try to enjoy yourself.âÂ
He gives you a moment to respond, but you canât. Thereâs nothing you can say as Wonwoo closes the distance between your lips. Itâs a soft kiss, much softer than youâd ever expected from him. Your body reacts, eyes closing, and you find yourself kissing him back.
Wonwoo grins, releasing your wrists in favour of grabbing your hip, pressing you harder against the wall. His tongue glides against your bottom lip and you canât help but open your mouth for him, fighting the moan that bubbles in your chest.Â
Thereâs something about this that feels electric, and after a mini battle with yourself, you give into the experience. Your hands grab at his strong shoulders, nails digging into his flesh as you kiss him back with more vigour, opening your mouth for him.
Wonwoo lets out a growl, deep in his chest, and the sound turns you on more than youâll ever admit. His hand is bruising on your hip now, groping at your skin and slipping under your shirt. You shift in his embrace, pulling him closer when you wrap your arms around the back of his neck.
His hand on your cheek moves down, gently latching around your throat. The motion makes you gasp, and Wonwoo pulls away from your lips, staring down at you. âThirsty.â
âYou fucker-â
âThirsty,â he repeats, pressing you against the wall and tightening his grip on your neck. You watch him drag his tongue across his sharp fangs. âJust say yes,â the vampire whispers. It almost sounds like heâs begging.Â
Youâre at war with yourself. Your body is clearly reacting to Wonwoo, but your mind still isnât there yet. Itâs almost torture, pressed to the wall by a man with a perfect body and power that practically thrums off of him.
You find yourself giving a small nod. âDonât hurt me,â you plead.
âNever,â he promises, kissing you softly one last time before he arches your jaw to the side. You grab at his shoulders, ready to dig your nails in when you feel his fangs-Â
His lips press to your throat and a shiver runs through your body. His tongue tastes your skin, drawing a circle that has you nearly dying with anticipation. When the bite finally comes, itâs not painful or sharp, it feels something like a hickey, and then it begins to throb.
A gasp tumbles out of you, and you cling to Wonwooâs broad shoulders, closing your eyes. The vampire releases a groan, reaching for your hand so he can intertwine your fingers, squeezing gently.Â
Youâve never felt close to someone like this, and the realization has your head spinning⊠or maybe thatâs the blood loss.Â
âWonwoo-â you whimper, starting to worry at how long heâs been sucking on your throat.
The throbbing stops, and you feel his tongue gliding over the bite mark, an attempt to soothe your skin. Then heâs pulling away, looking down at you as he licks his lips clean of your blood.
âGood girl,â he praises you, letting go of your hand. âYour turn.â You watch as he brings his thumb to his mouth, biting the tip before grabbing your jaw, pressing the digit into your mouth. âThis will heal the mark,â Wonwoo explains, watching as you begin to suck on his thumb.
He doesnât taste like blood. Instead, youâre reminded of strawberries and stone fruits. You swirl your tongue around his digit, sucking him deeper into your mouth-
âThatâs it,â the vampire groans, slowly pulling his thumb from you. He drags it across your lip. âAll better.â
When you touch your throat, you find only perfect skin. Thereâs nothing to suggest youâve just been bitten by a vampire.Â
âIf itâs any consolation,â Wonwoo leans down, his lips ghosting over your own, âyou taste delicious.â
âYou-â you swallow thickly, âyou do too.â
âYeah?â He grins.Â
You can only nod, leaning forward eagerly to capture him in a kiss again.Â
Youâre hungry for him, hungry in a way youâve never been before, hungry for more.
Wonwoo gives into your needs, working his lips against yours harder while his hands find your hips again. Your own fingers trace his broad shoulders, dipping down to tease over his chest before finding his abs-
âThatâs enough for tonight,â Wonwoo says suddenly, pulling away.
You realize youâd been about to grab his sweat pants, and you feel slightly embarrassed. Youâre not sure whatâs come over you-
âSorry-â
âAs much as Iâd love to give you everything you want, as a human, Iâd break you much too easily, darling.âÂ
Is he⊠is he going to withhold sex unless you become a vampire?
Jesus, are you actually considering this now?
What has this man done to you?
âIâm going out,â Wonwoo announces.
âWhere?â
âThe club. You were a tasty treat, but Iâll need more soon.â
For some reason, the thought of him biting anyone else makes you almost jealous. âTake me with you.â
âTo the vampire club?â Wonwoo laughs as he heads to his closet. âNo.â
âPlease?âÂ
âNo.â
âWhy not?â you ask.
âItâs too dangerous.â
âWhat if I stick to your side all night?âÂ
He turns to look at you, cocking a brow. âNot thinking of running anymore?â
You shake your head quickly.
âShame, a lie,â Wonwoo sighs. âBut I guess⊠anywhere you go, Iâll find you.â He reaches out, wrapping his hands around your throat and pulling you closer. âYouâre mine. If you run, the consequence will be a turning, does that sound fair?â
You feel like youâre gambling with fate, but you nod all the same.
âSay it,â the vampire tells you.Â
âIf⊠If I run, you can turn me.â
Wonwoo studies you for a moment, then he releases your throat. âFine. You can come to the club. Weâll get you food along the way if you promise to be good.â
Entering the club with Wonwoo is extremely different from entering alone. The bouncers seem to know the vampire with his hand firmly wrapped around your own, and although they give you odd looks, no one says anything.
The crowd parts for Wonwoo, and you feel eyes drilling into your form.Â
It had taken months to track down this specific club, there are few vampire safe havens like this one, and people tend to keep their mouth shut about this sort of thing. Yet, within the location itself, everyone seems to know whoâs vampire and whoâs human. Itâs an unspoken hierarchy, one youâre disturbing by being so close to Wonwoo while still owning a pulse.
Wonwoo leads you to the booth section youâd found him in last night. There are three vampires already sitting there, and they all stare as you approach. âShouldnât have brought you here,â Wonwoo sighs.
âWhy not?â
âTheyâre never going to let me live this down,â he explains. âIâve got a reputation to uphold.â
Itâs an interesting notion, the idea that youâre bringing down this asshole vampireâs street cred. But at the same time, you didnât force him to bring you here. Youâll never be able to force Wonwoo to do anything.
The vampire with the longest hair stands up from the booth as you approach, and youâre shocked when he smiles at you. âThis must be her,â he says, holding out a hand. When you take it, instead of shaking, the beautiful man leans down to kiss your knuckles.Â
âThis is Jeonghan,â Wonwoo tells you.
You give the vampire your own name, and when you hear Wonwoo whispering it behind you, you realize heâs yet to learn it. Had you really gone this long without introducing yourself to him properly? Had you let him bite you, and kiss you, and call you good girl, all without knowing your name?
âYouâre the vampire hunter,â comes the next voice, and the tallest vampire youâve ever seen stands to tower over you. âI thought youâd be dead by now.â
âMingyu,â Wonwoo warns, his hand moving to the small of your back in an almost protective gesture.
âVampire hunter?â The third man cocks his head. âI see youâve brought us a pretty little juice box.â
âJoshua,â now itâs Jeonghanâs turn to scold someone, and you realize through the long haired vampireâs behaviour that he must be the friend Wonwoo went to see about soulmates. Thereâs definitely a softness to him that the others donât have, an understanding.
âIs she not dinner?â Joshua simply blinks in confusion, unable to see what heâs done wrong.
âA fang bunny then, not dinner,â the final vampire suggests.
âExcuse Soonyoung and Joshua,â Jeonghan sighs, addressing you again, âlooks donât account for manners. How about I take you down to the bar for a drink and Wonwoo can explain to our friends whatâs going on,â he leans closer, lowering his voice, âWonwooâs never brought a girl home, Iâm sure you can understand the surprise.â
Youâd promised Wonwoo youâd stay by his side all night, and you canât help but look at him for permission to leave with Jeonghan. Your vampire mate meets your gaze with a steady look, and he gives you a quick nod before turning to his friends again.
Jeonghan takes your hand, pulling you away from the table and back toward the bar. âYou two look good together,â he muses. âFragility looks nice next to Wonwooâs controlled chaos, itâs a good balance.â
âWhatâs with you vampires and hating human fragility?â you ask.
âI canât speak for all vampires, but I can tell you itâs a trait of our fledgling group. Our old master was⊠brutal, to say the least. It left its scars.â Jeonghan looks down, and you can see an unreadable emotion cross his face. But heâs forcing a smile a moment later. âIt doesnât matter, Sung is gone, weâre free now.â
So Wonwoo hadnât only freed himself and you when heâd killed his maker. How many people had he saved? Youâd seen the act as something of a bloodthirsty move of defiance, but you hadnât been aware of the domino effect of it all, hadnât been aware that Sung had been cruel to humans and vampires alike, even his own spawn.Â
The bartender comes over with two glasses of red wine, and you reach for yours, only to have Jeonghanâs cold fingers latch around your wrist. âDonât drink that,â he warns you, eyes shifting to the human bartender. âSheâs not a red wine lover.â
âI can drink this-â
Jeonghan leans closer, voice lowering. âItâs blood, darling.â
Your eyes dip to the glass of red liquid and you pull your hand away, swallowing thickly. Something tells you this blood wouldnât taste like Wonwooâs had, thereâd be no strawberries and stone fruit, only harsh metalics.Â
âWhat would you like to drink?â Jeonghan asks.
You give your order and the bartender scurries away. Jeonghan moves both glasses of blood in front of himself, lifting one to his lips.Â
âStupid humans,â he mutters, only realizing his mistake a moment later. âNot you of course, as Wonwooâs soulmate, youâre an extension of us.â
Itâs very odd to be accepted like this. Youâve never met any vampires like these ones, and theyâre reshaping your view of things that go bump in the night.
Your gaze moves back to the table of vampires, and youâre shocked to find Wonwoo standing with a new person youâve not yet met. Theyâre comparable in size, and from your distance, it almost looks like theyâre arguing. Then you see Wonwoo motion, pointing toward the hallway that leads to the alley heâd taken you last night.
âJeonghan?â You tap on the manâs arm. âWhoâs that with Wonwoo?â
âShit,â Jeonghan cusses. âHeâs bad news.â
And here youâd thought Wonwoo was bad news, can this new man be even worse?
You watch the two heated vampires begin to head through the crowd, clearly intent on taking this outside. Mingyu, Joshua and Soonyoung watch from the booth, but they donât make a move to follow.Â
âDoes- does Wonwoo need backup?â you ask.
Jeonghan considers it for a moment. âDoubtful. Heâd probably be mad if we went out after him.â
As you watch Wonwoo disappear, your heart clenches in your chest. âI think we should follow.â
âHeâs fine,â Jeonghan assures you.
âI donât care.â
âWonwoo wouldnât want you there,â the vampire tries to convince you. âYouâre fragile, human, it would only make things worse.â
âScrew that.â
âYour drink isnât even here yet-â
But youâre already moving away from the bar, and Jeonghan scrambles to follow you, grabbing both glasses of wine. âThis is a bad idea,â he insists, but youâre done listening to him. âWonwoo can take care of himself.â
To be fair, that might be true. However, thereâs a pull, deep in your chest. Something tells you Wonwoo will need you soon, although youâre not quite sure in what capacity.Â
Your pace quickens as you head down the dark hallway, and you push open the exit door, quickly looking around.Â
Wonwoo has the other vampire pressed to the brick wall behind the bar, and theyâre grappling at each other, practically snarling. You have no clue whoâs the aggressor, but you know who the winner will be, and you reach into your jacket for your blade.
âWonwoo!â you scream, catching his attention for a moment, but itâs all you need to toss the weapon toward him. He catches it easily, driving the stake into the other man without a second thought.
A choked sound leaves you, and a hand covers your eyes. Jeonghan presses against your back, cradling you while you hear the sounds of your vampire mate eviscerating his opponent.Â
Jeonghan turns you in his arms. âDonât look,â he urges, removing his palm from your view. Heâs still holding a wine glass, and you see the other sitting on the garbage can a few feet away. The sight of the blood makes your stomach churn. You try to take deep breaths to calm yourself, but itâs difficult in a situation like this.
Something moves in the periphery of your vision and you turn your head to see Wonwoo standing there, reaching for the wine glass. His skin is marred with red, his hair a tangle of curls. Your mateâs eyes are dark, and he closes them as he downs the red liquid, tossing the glass to the side when heâs through with it. The cup shatters across the alleyway.Â
âWonwoo-â you breathe, reaching for him, needing to check if heâs hurt.
âWhy did you two come out here?â he asks, staring at Jeonghan.
âShe insisted.â
Oh, to be thrown under the bus by a vampire.
Wonwoo cracks a grin, gaze shifting to you. âBrat.âÂ
âKiller,â you retort.
âHe deserved it,â Wonwoo assures you, reaching out to grab you by the back of the neck, pulling you closer.Â
Heâs covered in blood and he looks like a sexy, wild monster. But heâs your monster, and you canât help but react, leaning in-
âJesus Christ,â you hear Jeonghan breathe, turning to give you and Wonwoo privacy while he presses his lips against yours hungrily.
At first, you can try to ignore the wet liquid on your fingertips as you grab at his strong shoulders, but you canât ignore the taste on his tongue. Your body goes rigid and Wonwoo pulls back with a sigh, resting his forehead against yours.Â
Itâs an oddly peaceful moment amongst the chaos.
Wonwoo lets you go, turning to his friend. âHelp me with the body,â he instructs.
âThe club owner isnât going to like this,â Jeonghan groans, although he does as heâs told, following Wonwoo toward the body crumpled by the wall.
The vampire has been practically torn to pieces- you shift your gaze again, wiping at your mouth just in case thereâs any blood on your skin.
âIâll explain what happened,â Wonwoo says.Â
âExplain it to me then.â
You focus on the ground, not wanting to look as you hear the two vampires open a large dumpster.Â
Wonwoo has lowered his voice to respond to his friend, but you hear the words soulmate and threatened.Â
Had this killing been over you? The thought makes your stomach tie into knots again.
âYou canât bring her here again, not while sheâs still human,â Jeonghan muses.
âYou think I donât know that?â Wonwoo snaps. âI didnât even want to bring her today!â
âThen why did you?â
âItâs hard to say no to her, something you should understand. Canât believe you let her come out here-â
âI didnât let her do anything,â Jeonghan insists. âThat soulmate of yours has a mind of her own. Besides, my hands were full.â
Your eyes shift to the glass of wine still sitting on a small trash can, and you move to retrieve it.Â
âYouâll get this properly cleaned up, wonât you?â Wonwoo asks.
âYeah, I got you,â Jeonghan sighs. âBut you owe me one.â
âIâd expect nothing less.âÂ
You hear them walking over again, and you turn to face the approaching vampires, holding out the âwineâ for Jeonghan.
âThank you, darling,â he offers you a smile, taking the glass.Â
You can only nod, gaze shifting to Wonwoo, who still looks gorgeous even while covered in blood.Â
He takes your hand gently. âCome on, brat, letâs get out of here.â
Mingyu had come around with his car to take you home, helping avoid any uber drivers who would take one look at Wonwooâs blood-speckled face and driven the other way. It had been a tense ten minutes, with hardly a word spoken.
Now, youâre in Wonwooâs bathroom, helping him take off his shirt so you can wash him clean.
He watches as you ring out a warm soapy cloth, bunching it up and bringing it toward his shoulders first. Itâs hard to focus with his intense gaze fixed on you, but you do your best, wiping away the blood from his throat.
âI have to turn you,â he says.
You sigh. âI know.â
âAre you upset with me?â
You shake your head, daring a look into his dark eyes.Â
The vampire cocks his head, hands finding your hips while he leans back against the sink. âIâll be gentle,â he promises. âOne bite, Iâll nearly drain you, and on the cusp between life or death, Iâll give you my own blood. Youâll probably pass out, for a little while, and when you wake up, youâll be like me.â
âExcept youâll be my master,â you point out, drawing the cloth across his bloody cheekbone.Â
âI wonât abuse that power.â
For some reason, you believe him.
Silence fills the bathroom while you continue to clean him, but your mind is very much active.Â
Youâve spent over ten years with one goal and one goal only, to avenge your parents. Youâd been told it was a fool's errand, so youâd never quite planned for what came next. Part of you had always expected to die young- and if youâd been at the house instead of with a friend the day Sung had come for your family, you would have.Â
The idea of living forever is a lot to grapple with, but Wonwooâs the one that makes it possible.
Heâd completed your life task, and now, heâs offering you a new path, one thatâs rich with shadows, but also love. In a way, maybe you canât ask for anything more than that.
âDo you think it will satisfy you?â you question. âHaving me when you know I canât refuse you?â
Wonwoo considers you for a moment, and his silence makes you anxious.
âI just meanâŠâ you bite at your lip, cleaning the last speckle of blood from his skin before tossing the cloth down. âWouldnât it be better to have me for the first time while Iâm still human? When you know Iâm saying yes out of my own free will?â
âDarling,â his fingers dig into your hips, âare you asking me to fuck you?â
âIâm just- I know I want you, I think that much is obvious. I just think that if I wait to have you until after Iâm a vampire, maybe there will always be a part of me that questions it. I want to experience you now, as I am, as a human.â
âItâs an interesting proposition,â Wonwoo admits.
âJust interesting?â you tease, wrapping your arms around his strong shoulders.
Wonwoo straightens. No longer leaning against the sink, he towers over you again, and it takes your anxieties away.Â
âIs this really what you want?â he asks.
You take a deep breath and nod.Â
âIâll be as gentle as I know how,â he reaches out, brushing his fingers along your arm, âbut I canât make any promises.â
âItâs okay,â you assure him, tongue darting out to wet your lips. âI like rough.â
âAre you sure about that, pretty girl?â Wonwoo grins, grabbing your hips and tugging you closer.Â
It feels amazing to be pressed against him now, your palms coming to rest on his broad chest. Heâs so beautiful, you can hardly control yourself around him anymore.Â
âI want you to ravage me,â you tell him. âAnd when we both finish, you can turn me. I think⊠I think Iâm ready for my life with you. Thereâs nothing for me with the old one anyways, not anymore.âÂ
The vampire studies you, and you avert your gaze, only for his fingers to find the bottom of your chin. He tilts your head up so youâre forced to meet his eyes. âIâm going to take care of you,â Wonwoo whispers, and then he leans in to press his lips against yours.
You melt against his chest, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck. Your mouth parts much too easily for Wonwoo, and he drags his tongue along yours, earning a sigh of relief from deep within you. Your brain has been so full since seeing Wonwoo eviscerate that rival vampire, itâs good to be in your body now, mind going numb from your soulmateâs touch.
In one easy motion, Wonwoo turns you so youâre the one with your back to the sink. He bends down, tearing your pants off before grabbing your thighs and lifting you onto the counter, slotting between your legs while he kisses you harder.Â
His hands find your shirt, and you break the kiss to tear it off, leaving you in your underwear. Wonwooâs lips find your neck, and you tangle your fingers in his hair, groaning. You throw your head back, wrapping your legs tighter around his hips. âBite me,â you urge him, missing the sensation.
The vampire grins against your throat, and you feel his fangs a moment later. He doesnât tease you with kisses or licking this time, he simply sinks his teeth into you. The throbbing feeling courses through you and you gasp, digging your nails into his shoulders while Wonwoo drinks from you.Â
Youâve never felt close to someone like this before. Wonwoo is grabbing your hips hard, leaning closer while he uses you for his own strength. He presses forward, allowing you to feel his cock growing in his jeans, denim catching against your panties. Then his hands slip behind you, and he undoes your bra, tearing it off.Â
Your nipples pebble in the cool of the bathroom, and Wonwooâs cold hands donât help any as they move up to cup your breasts. Your soulmate pulls away from your throat, releasing a groan.
Warm blood begins to drip down your skin, heâd bitten you harder than last time. As the track of red makes it to your nipple, Wonwoo bends down, capturing the sensitive bud in his mouth and licking roughly.Â
You whimper at the sensation, tangling your fingers in his hair as he drags his tongue up, collecting all the blood thatâs just spilt from your neck. The vampire groans when he makes it to your bite mark, and he adjusts slightly, biting his thumb before pressing it into your mouth. âNeed you healed or I might lose control,â he says, voice husky.
You can only suck in his digit, closing your eyes and enjoying the tingly feeling of your wound disappearing.Â
Your soulmate pulls his hand from your mouth, bringing his newly spit-covered fingers to your panty-clad core. He applies a good amount of pressure to your clit and you cry out, grabbing at his jaw to bring his lips back to yours.
The vampire rubs you teasingly, working you up until youâre practically rutting against his hand. âPlease,â you moan, feeling absolutely desperate now.
Wonwoo rewards you by pushing your panties to the side, sinking two fingers into your hot core while you groan into each otherâs mouths.Â
âAlready so wet for me,â Wonwoo muses. âIs this how you always react to vampires, darling?â
You shake your head, whimpering as he strokes your inner walls expertly. âJust you,â you tell him.
Wonwoo lets out a growl. With his free hand he grabs your wrist, bringing your palm to his chest. âCan you feel what youâre doing to me?â
At first, youâre confused, but then you feel something, a rough thumping, as if his heart is clawing to get out of his ribcage. âIâm doing this to you?â you ask in wonder.
âAnd this,â he guides your hand down further, so you can feel how hard he is in his jeans now.Â
âFuck, youâre big-â
Wonwoo laughs, working his fingers into you even harder. âThink youâll be able to make it fit?â
âUh huh,â you nod eagerly. âWeâll make it fit.âÂ
His digits crook up, stroking a spot that has your thighs quivering around his hips. You squeeze his cock through his jeans, hoping to drive Wonwoo even a fraction as wild as heâs driving you.
Your soulmate lets out a satisfied groan, and the sound goes straight to your core, which squelches around his fingers. âIâm close,â you warn him, nearly panting now as the orgasm builds in the pit of your stomach.
âYeah?â Wonwoo grinds his palm against your clit and youâre nearly seeing stars.Â
You let go of his cock, needing to anchor yourself on his strong shoulders as he leans in to kiss your throat. He focuses on the spot heâd bitten, and even though itâs healed, youâre still sensitive there, sending throbbing tingles through your form.
âFuck, Wonwoo-â You clench your eyes shut as you reach your high, your entire being now consumed with pleasure. Youâve never felt anything like this. Itâs almost an out of body experience, your cries leaving your lips as you dig your nails into his shoulders, throbbing ceaselessly with ecstasy.Â
âThatâs it, pet,â Wonwoo coos, fingers continuing to abuse your hole even as your walls contract around him. âWhoâs my good little human?â
âMe,â you whimper, threading your hand through his hair so you can keep him to your throat. You almost want to ask him to bite you again, but you hold yourself back, enjoying the last moments of your orgasm.
You finish with a gasp, breathing hard.Â
Wonwoo takes his hand from your core, pulling away from your neck. He watches you with dark eyes as he brings his fingers to his lips, licking them clean. The vampire lets out a groan. âEverything about you tastes so fucking sweet, darling.â
God. You need him like youâve never needed anyone in your whole life.
âPlease,â you moan.
âPlease, what?â he teases.
âTake me,â you whisper. âMake me yours.â
âDarling,â Wonwoo leans closer, his lips ghosting over your own, âI thought youâd never ask.â
He pulls you off the sink, tucking you close to his chest and carrying you back to the bedroom. The lights are off, and when he gently places you on the bed, his beautiful frame is illuminated from the glow of the bathroom.Â
You canât see his face, but you can see heâs smiling, and his fangs flash. His hands move to his belt and he undoes it. You bite at your lip, sitting up onto your elbows while you watch him.Â
He pushes his pants down, and you can just make out the impressive size of his cock. âWish I could see you,â you muse.
âI can see you,â he retorts. âWhen I turn you, youâll be able to see in the dark too.â
âAre you really going to make me wait?â
âYou wonât have to wait long,â Wonwoo reminds you. âYou can be patient for this first time, canât you, human? After tonight, weâll have forever.â
You canât even imagine what forever entails, and you distract yourself from it by pulling your panties down, tossing them to the floor. You spread your legs for the vampire at the foot of the bed and he releases a groan.
âYou are beautiful,â he admits.
âEven for a human?â
âEven for a vampire hunter,â Wonwoo presses a knee to the bed.
âThought you said I was a sorry excuse for a vampire hunter.âÂ
âI may have said something along those lines,â he grins.
âA vampire hunter with no kills under her belt-â
Wonwoo presses his hand to the bed next to your head, leaning over you while you wrap your legs around his hips. âAre you looking for an apology, darling?â
âIt would help,â you sigh, enjoying the way he ruts his cock against your hot core.
âIâm sorry I called you a filthy little human who fancies herself a vampire hunter,â Wonwoo smirks, âI was having a bad day, and I misspoke⊠youâre a darling little human whoâs about to become a vampire fucker.â
âWonwoo-â you push at his chest, hating how harsh his words sound.
âYouâre right,â your soulmate concedes, âyouâre not a vampire fucker, Iâm the one on top.â
âYouâre horrible!â you screech, but at the same time, youâre giggling now.
âTell me you love it,â he insists, leaning in to press his lips to your neck. âTell me you donât want me to fuck you stupid. That you donât want me to sink my fangs into this pretty throat and make you mine, my eternal mate, untouchable to anyone but me.â
It does sound nice, and you shiver as Wonwoo presses his cold body down against yours.
âIâll enjoy it once youâre turned,â Wonwoo breathes. âYou wonât be able to be bratty with me. Iâll ask you what's on your mind and youâll have to answer.â
âIâm just thinking how nice this is going to be,â you admit.
âNice?â He laughs, pulling away to look down at you.Â
âObviously it will be a lot to figure out,â you back pedal slightly, âbut⊠I donât know, you really are my soulmate, and I know youâll take care of me.â
The vampire simply blinks.Â
âWhat?â you ask, cupping his face.
âThis is the first time youâve admitted it,â Wonwoo points out.Â
âI wouldnât let you bite me if you werenât,â you remind him. âWouldnât let you fuck me-â
âI havenât fucked you yet,â your soulmate grins, pushing his hips so his cock brushes by your clit as if to prove his point.
âAnd Iâm devastated,â you say dramatically. âPlease, Wonwoo- just fuck me!â
Wonwoo presses his lips to yours, and you love that heâs smiling into the kiss. You tangle your fingers in his hair, hooking your legs tighter around his hips. Youâre still so wet from his fingers, and each small drag of his cock between your pussy lips feels like heaven.Â
Heâs such a tease, but you kind of love it.
The vampire adjusts slightly, reaching between your bodies, and then his cock slides into you. Itâs just the head at first, but itâs enough to have you gasping and clawing at him. He thrusts shallowly, pushing deeper and deeper until his hips are flush to your own and every impressive inch of him is stretching you open.
âFuck-â you whimper, toes curling from how full you feel.
Wonwoo collects one of your hands, linking your fingers and pressing it down against the pillow. âAre you sure youâre ready for this, my pretty human?â
âUh huh,â you nod, swallowing thickly. âI told you,â you lean up, letting your lips ghost past his while you stare into his eyes, âravage me.â
Your vampire lover groans, smashing his mouth to yours and squeezing your hand, then he begins to thrust into you and your mind goes completely blank. He fills you up perfectly- itâs like you were always meant to be full in this way.Â
Now that youâve tasted this, how can you ever get enough?
You can tell heâs holding back, can tell heâs still trying to be careful with your fragile form. You lock your legs tighter around his hips, a wordless encouragement to go harder. You wonder what itâs going to be like once youâre on his level, once youâre a vampire like him. If sex with him feels this good and heâs only at a fraction of his power, you bet undying fucking will kill you all over again.
Each snap of his hips presses his cock deep into your core, and your walls greedily eat him up. Youâre moaning desperately against his mouth, squeezing his hand while tangling your fingers through his hair with the other.Â
Wonwooâs fangs drag by your lip, teasing you just enough to be on the verge of painful.Â
Youâre so lost in him you donât even care, you bite him back, tugging on his curls and whimpering a sound of affirmation. This time, when his teeth make contact with your lip, itâs with enough force to pierce.Â
Wonwoo groans immediately, suckling on your lower lip. Itâs throbbing slightly, but unlike when he goes for your neck, his teeth arenât still inside of you. Heâs simply made a small incision, and now your vampire lover is making the most of it, kissing you so greedily that you canât even taste the metallic proof of what heâs just done.
He simply canât get enough of you, and you canât get enough of him. You push on the hand capturing yours to the bed and Wonwoo relents, allowing you to grab at his shoulder while he fucks you harder, pressing you into the mattress.
With his fingers now free, he shoves them between your bodies, rubbing your clit and making your legs shake around his hips.Â
With each lick and suck at your bleeding lip, heâs getting rougher with you. Your lifeâs blood is giving him strength, making him more feral, and youâre enjoying the show.Â
Your pussy is throbbing again, just like your lip, and you know youâre achingly close to another orgasm. When has cumming ever been this easy? Wonwoo feels like a dream, or perhaps a nightmare, youâre still not sure.
âClose, darling?â Wonwoo asks, dragging his tongue across your teeth. You taste something on him, and realize heâs bitten himself, allowing his blood to heal your lip wound just as suddenly as it had been given.Â
You nod, crying out as he rubs your clit harder. He stares down at you, in the dark there are angular shadows on his face, his pretty cheekbones all sharp-
âYou lookâŠâ he licks his lips, âbeautiful.â
âWonwoo-â you whimper, body shuddering at the praise, your core twisting and aching as he continues to fuck into you wildly.
âThatâs it,â the vampire coos, âcum on my cock, I need to feel you.â
You literally canât help yourself. His voice is too sexy, his cock is too big, and youâre way too deep into the kinkiness of bloodsharing vampire sex to refuse any command he gives you. You let out a cry of ecstasy as your second orgasm of the night slams into you, ravaging your form and making you see stars.
Wonwoo buries his face against your neck, teasing you with his teeth and tounge while he fucks you through his high. With each second of overstimulated pleasure, you hang on the edge of anticipation, wondering if heâs about to bite you-
But he doesnât. He simply works you through your orgasm until youâre a shaking mess.
You can feel tears in your eyes, but youâre not quite sure why theyâre there.
When Wonwoo looks down at you again, he notices your tears, his brows furrowing. But he doesnât question you on it, he simply brushes them away with his thumb while you shiver and recollect yourself after that mind numbing high.
You drag his face in for a kiss, pouring all your emotions into the merging of your lips. It must be clear to him that youâre okay, that youâre feeling just a little broken right now- but to be fair, you had asked him to ravage you.
There are underlying feelings being brought up, and in the periphery of your mind, youâre questioning your own mortality.
This is your last night on earth as a human, your last hour even- and although you know Wonwoo will take care of you, thereâs something scary about it.
Youâre diving into the deep, dark, unknown with your new soulmate, entrusting him as your guide after living an entire life without trusting anyone.
Trusting feels foreign to you, but you do trust Wonwoo, and thatâs a scary thought in and of itself.
âOkay,â you say, swallowing thickly and letting out a shaky breath, âIâm ready for more.â
âIâd almost worried Iâd broken you,â Wonwoo admits, pressing another soft kiss to your lips.
âIt was a good broken,â you tell him, heart swelling in your chest at the fact that heâd been concerned for you.Â
âAnd now my little human wants more,â Wonwoo muses. âYouâre not as fragile as you look, are you, darling?â
You shake your head.
âThink you can get on your knees for me?â the vampire asks, pushing his body weight off of you.
âUh huh,â you nod, whimpering a little at the loss of his cock from your core. You get into position, turning your back to him and adjusting on your knees, wiggling you ass gently to entice him.
âPretty human,â Wonwoo breathes, hands ghosting down your sides before taking two fistfuls of your bum and squeezing.Â
You feel his cock at your entrance again, and he pushes into you, making you both moan. In this position it almost feels like he hits deeper. You go fully doggy, resting your face against his pillows and arching your back.
âIâd tell you to be good for me, but Iâm pretty sure Iâve fucked the brat out of you already. Isnât that right, darling?â He lands a gentle smack to your ass that has you whimpering.Â
Heâs such a cocky asshole and it makes you groan. You can feel yourself throb around him at his words, betraying what you really think about the line heâs just used on you.
âThatâs what I thought.â You can practically hear him grinning, and his hands move to your waist. His touch is almost bruising, but it feels so good as he begins to thrust into you again. Each movement has his hips hitting your ass, and the sound of sex fills the room.
You love the noises heâs making, soft, breathy groans, and deep rumbles that border on growls. Thereâs no time for talking anymore, your mind is much more preoccupied in the pleasure building within you both.
Youâre still sensitive from two orgasms, so when you slip your hand under your body to rub your clit, your pussy immediately reacts. You clench tightly around Wonwoo, who lets out a moan at the sensation, fucking you even harder and faster.
Each thrust has you crying out now, whines of desperation slipping out of you while you rub your clit, eyes shut.Â
Suddenly, Wonwoo is wrapping a hand around the front of your throat, pulling you up onto your knees with your back to his chest. His lips ghost by your ear. âSo eager to cum again?â he asks.
You can only nod, grabbing at the forearm now pinned against your front while Wonwooâs other hand tightens around your neck. Heâs buried deep inside of you now, unmoving, and youâve never felt this full.
âYou know what happens when you cum, donât you, darling?âÂ
âI-â Youâre so delirious from his cock you canât even think.
ââWhen we cum, you can turn me,â thatâs what you said, wasnât it, pet?â Wonwoo lets out a chuckle. âAre you really that eager? Or just a little dim with my cock buried so deep in this perfect pussy of yours?â
âI remember,â you gasp, head beginning to swim with how hard heâs gripping your throat.
âSo you are eager,â the vampire confirms. âThatâs cute.âÂ
He lets go of you, pushing you down to the bed. His hand finds the back of your neck and he holds your face down, grabbing your hip with the other. âI guess you can cum as fast as you want, little pet. Iâd be happy to taste you again.â
Youâre gasping against the pillow, enjoying how rough heâs being with you now. Thereâs something about having his hand on your neck, keeping you down while he begins to fuck into you again.Â
âAre you close?â you ask, enjoying the groans leaving his own lips.
Wonwoo laughs. âWhen you cum, I cum.â
âLucky me,â you whisper, reaching for your clit again. Your pussy pulses with ecstasy as you begin to rub the sensitive nub, your eyes closing from the pleasure.Â
âNaughty human,â Wonwoo states, but thereâs something like pride in his tone. âI guess I havenât fucked the brat out of you just yet.â
âYou love that Iâm a brat,â you insist. âIt gives you something you want to control, and we both know how much you like control.â
Wonwooâs thrusts falter ever so slightly. âI didnât realize you knew me so well, little soulmate.â
âI do,â you groan. âJust like I know that if I start begging, youâll really lose your head.â
Wonwoo lets out a laugh, and you see it as a challenge.
âPlease,â you whimper, rubbing your clit harder and cutting off your soulmateâs laugh. âPlease, Wonwoo, Iâm so close-â
The vampire behind you lets out a growl, fucking you faster. His grip on your neck pushes you down against the bed more, but it does nothing to muffle the begging thatâs beginning to tumble past your lips.
âWant you to fill me up. Want you to make me see stars. Want you to bite me like only you can-â
âFuck-â Wonwoo groans.
Suddenly heâs letting go of your neck and flipping you over. Youâre not on your back for even a moment before heâs pushing into your core again, his lips eager against your own. His tongue invades your mouth, shutting up your begging while you tangle your fingers through his hair.
One of his hands is planted on the pillow next to you, and the other is on your hip, digging into your skin while he fucks you so hard the bed shakes.
âPlease,â you whimper, so close to the edge you can almost taste it again.
Wonwooâs mouth moves to your throat and your entire body tenses with anticipation, teetering on the edge of pleasure that you know is going to be nothing like anything youâve ever experienced before.
You drag your fingers against his scalp, panting hard. âBite me,â you beg. âBite me, please- Iâll cum so hard if you just bite me-â
The vampire lets out a primal groan, and then his teeth are sinking into your flesh. The throbbing sensation erupts through your entire body, going straight to your core, which clenches desperately around Wonwooâs cock.Â
A strangled cry leaves your lips as your orgasm overtakes you. Your grip tightens in Wonwooâs hair, holding him to your throat as you ascend to a height of pleasure that has you weak all over-Â
From the noises leaving your soulmate, you know heâs just cum too, and the thought makes your body tingle as he drinks steadily from your neck.Â
His thrusts begin to slow, but the speed to which heâs devouring you remains a constant. Suddenly, you realize that thereâs no coming back from cloud 9, youâre simply floating- floating, floating, with only his hair as your anchor, but soon, you begin to lose your grip on even that.
Your throat is really pulsing now, but itâs getting noticeably weaker, and the heat of the bite is dying down. Maybe itâs not the only thing dying, you realize, with your eyes closed and your lids too heavy to lift.
Something presses to your lips, filling your mouth with a familiar flavour.Â
Strawberries and stone fruits.
You do your best to swallow, but itâs kind of difficult. Youâre so tired, so very tired-
âDrink up, darling,â Wonwoo says. His voice feels far away. âCome back to me. Iâm not done with you yet.â
Part of you wishes you could simply drift off, but your soulmate's words are enticing. You push yourself to do as he says, drinking the sweet nectar and regaining your strength, drawing you back to him.Â
When youâre finally able to open your eyes, Wonwoo isnât on top of you anymore. Heâs laying in bed next to you, watching.Â
You roll onto your side, mirroring him. âDid I pass out?â
âI warned you that might happen,â he reminds you, reaching out to push a strand of hair away from your face.Â
His touch sends sparks through your body and you lick your lips, feeling pulled to the man in front of you. Thatâs when you realize, the lights are still off, but you can see Wonwoo perfectly. âIâm like you now,â you whisper.
âYouâre like me,â Wonwoo agrees. âDo you have any regrets?â
âNo,â you shake your head. âDo you?â
Heâs quiet for a moment. âJust one.â
âYeah?â You shift closer, palms flattening against his cold chest.Â
âAfter you passed out, I realized thereâs one thing I never said to you while you were human, not in so many words, at least.âÂ
âItâs not like youâve known me long,â you try to assure him.
âThat doesnât matter,â Wonwoo insists. âI still should have said it. Like you wanting to experience me while still human, I should have said it while you still had a heart that beats.â
âI hate to break it to you, mister vampire,â you grin, taking his hand and pressing it to your chest, âbut my dead heart is beating for you the same way yours beats for me. Just say it now.â
Wonwoo takes his hand from your chest, reaching up to cup your cheek. âI love you, even though I thought Iâd never love anyone. I thought Iâd be alone forever, but now⊠here you are. And I⊠I love you.âÂ
You grin at your vampire mate, adoring how vulnerable heâs being with you. âI also thought Iâd be alone forever,â you admit. âThought Iâd die young and bloody, which, I guess is kind of true, but youâve given me something new, something I could have never imagined, and I canât wait to explore this second life with you. I love you too, Wonwoo, as crazy as it sounds.â
Wonwoo grins, and you return the expression. His thumb moves up to drag past your teeth. âThe fangs suit you, my love,â he muses.
The petname makes you smile wider, shifting closer and wrapping your leg around his hip, mounting the pretty vampire. âHungry,â you whisper, leaning down to press your lips to his neck.
âWeâll have to go get you some food.â
âNot for that,â you laugh, licking his throat. âFor you.â
âAre you sure youâre strong enough, darling?â Wonwoo asks. âYouâve just been turned, maybe you should rest-â
âIâve got strength enough to have you again, that is⊠if you have the energy, my big, scary, vampire master.â
Now itâs his turn to moan at the new petname, even if it is said slightly in jest.
âStill a brat,â Wonwoo muses, fingers skimming down your sides.Â
âYouâll be entertained forever,â you insist.
âAnd what if master tells you to be a good girl and keep your pretty mouth shut?â
You laugh. âThen youâd miss me after a minute and ask me to start begging again.â
Wonwoo sighs in defeat, then heâs rolling the two of you so youâre on your back, pressed between him and the mattress. âI guess we might as well start your new life off with a bang, shouldnât we, my love?â
âIâd be mad if we didnât,â you admit.
Wonwoo only laughs, pressing his lips to yours. You might have forever with him, but right now, youâre as eager and needy as youâve ever been, and he doesnât mind catering to you, not one bit.Â
âïžÂ mlist + an. thank you for reading! Vampire Wonwoo just bites different- I know I say that about every new fic but for real, I'd initially planned on this being a more slow burn but Soulmate sexy vampire asshole Wonwoo? as if we all wouldn't be climbing that man like a tree
đ support me by. sending a tip here or here - or become a patron to access monthly bonus content and extensions for fics like this one :) find the Patreon teaser below!Â
đź preview. âTell me what you want.â You kind of hate it when he uses his vampire master abilities on you, but at the same time, it allows you to dish out your darkest fantasies with no fear of disapproval. âI want you to make me cum so hard I canât even think.â
cw/ tw. Oral (f receiving), blood play/vampiric drinking from each other, biting, roughhousing, fingering, orgasm control, orgasm denial, dacryphilia, overstim, man handling, pinning, unprotected sex, dirty talk, praise, size kink, soft dom wonwoo, mentions of wandering eyes, multiple reader orgasms, thigh grinding, hair pulling, etc⊠I pet names: (hers) brat, darling.
đč rating. 18+ explicit I wc. 2.8k I teaser wc. 300
đ staring. Wonwoo x afab!reader
bonus
âBratty baby is at it again,â Jeonghan says fondly, watching you saunter away from the table with Mingyu toward the bar. âServes you right for staring at that juice box.â
âYouâre not going to take my side on this one?â Wonwoo laughs, amused at the night's turn of events.
âNot a chance,â the long-haired vampire grins. âI donïżœïżœïżœt know why youâd even need to look at any of these fang bunnies with a soulmate like her.â
Wonwoo sighs, knowing his friend is right. He still canât help but defend himself. âA man gets thirsty.â
âThatâs what this is for,â Jeonghan retorts, swirling the liquid in his wine glass. âYou gave up fang bunnies and juice boxes the moment you met your soulmate, and we both know it.â
âYeah, yeah,â Wonwoo shakes his head, eyes shifting to you again. He supposes itâs only fair that you get to flirt with the bartender after heâd just been caught looking at a scantily clad woman, but the fairness of the situation does little to lessen the fire building inside of him.
You should know by now that he only has eyes for you⊠even if his gaze wanders from time to time. He canât help his predatory instincts, although, he should get more of a manage on them. In fact, he should stop bringing you to vampire bars altogether, but itâs difficult to resist a night out amongst his brood mates.Â
âWe all know this is a kink of theirs,â Joshua muses. âThey fight a little, piss each other off, and then they fuck in the back of Mingyuâs car while he drives them home like a chauffeur.â
âThatâs only happened twice,â Wonwoo insists.
Joshua scoffs loudly. âMingyu had to implement a no fucking in his jeep policy, it definitely happened more than twice.â
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J.R.R. Tolkien, The History of Middle-earth vol. 9: Sauron Defeated - âThe second version of the Epilogueâ (p. 127â128)
#PROFESSOR TOLKIEN I AM IN YOUR WALLS.#this entire epilogue is devastating (honorific)#âand it seemed to sam that the fire burned low at her goingâ#âlet them come! their time will soon be over. sam's coming back.â#âhe heard suddenly deep and unstilled the sigh and murmur of the sea upon the shores of middle-earthâ#weeping. rending my garments. if i had a physical copy of this i'd be flinging it across the room.#not pictured here but aragorn's letter also has me in tears. âhe's coming north again.â giving them all elvish names (nerd).#âmaster perhael who should be panthaelâ AUGH#jirt. jirt. jirt return my calls. pick up for god's sake man#lotr#samwise gamgee#elanor gardner#sauron defeated#quotes#j.r.r. tolkien#âi suppose we shall have to come back?â âyes and we shall want to in a wayâ
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The Eyes of Death.
This story is mostly inspired by Jaybirbie's prompt | Master post | Next?
"Hey, sweetheart?" Danny called, quickly jotting down the last sentence for his paper. He'd have to remember to go back and reread it and make sure he didn't trail off into another tangent. He swears he wasn't this bad at managing his ADHD back in Amity...
"Yes, Danny?" Damian asked, turning back from the door to face him as he scrolled further down the story he was reading. The familiar font of Gotham City's gazette blurred as a picture of Mr. Freeze and Penguin finally loaded. So that's what was going on. Danny should have known; the bats already dealt with the other usual rouges, and these two were next on the list.
"Can you walk with me? I just know Nancy and her boyfriend are out there, waiting. I really don't want to deal with them again... We could spend more time at my place? Tucker sent me another movie, and I'm unsure if I should watch it alone after last time." Danny pleaded, quickly shoving all of his papers into his bag. He'd deal with straightening them out later, it wasn't like his professors weren't used to his wrinkled essays at this point.
However, he should probably redo the blueprints for Workshop. Mr. Anthlow was a hardass, but nothing could compare to his anger when a student handed in wrinkled blueprints; he claimed he wasn't going to have another 'Tanner' incident on his watch, whatever the heck that meant.
He was not looking forward to whatever Nancy wanted to talk to him about, she looked excited. Which could only mean bad things for him; considering the last time she was excited, he ended up spending time with Bane of all people. And there was no way her boyfriend was just going to let Danny get away again.
Damian grimaces, finally looking up and away from his phone. "I'm sorry beloved..." he held up the device just in time to show an incoming text from his Father, "I promised Father I'd be home a while ago. And with what's happening down on-"
"It's ok, I'll just head out the back door," Danny cut in, seeing the start of guilt on his boyfriend's face. He knew how much Danny hated having to deal with those two, and the fact Damian hasn't been able to even introduce himself to them hasn't helped. With a smile, Danny scooped up his textbooks and made his way to stand in front of Damian, "They can't bother me if they don't see me!"
Unsurprisingly, Danny could feel the guilt grow and start to float around Damian as the boy glanced at his phone, the message tone sounding out again in warning.
Danny only met Damian's father once; it was just a simple shake of hands and sharing names before the man ran off, but it did leave an impression. The man felt tired and paranoid; like, to the point Danny kind of wanted to drag Jazz over and lock the two of them in a room, paranoid. (Danny wants to say he's never seen someone that paranoid, but he'd be lying. He looks in the mirror after all.)
The point is; Danny's only met the man once, but that was enough for him to know that the man would tear down the world if he thought for even a second that one of his kids was in danger. This meant, that if Damian didn't go and reassure his father that he was alive and safe within the next sixty or so seconds, then there was a possibility that there wouldn't be another date for at least another week.
And considering this "study date" was supposed to make up for the last one Damian had missed because of his Father? Yeah, Danny wasn't going to be happy if Damian got grounded or dragged into another 'surprise' family road trip because his father was convinced his children would be dead before the 'yearly' planned get-together in November.
They had a trip to the zoo planned for tomorrow, and Delilah was supposed to be allowed out with her kids. This would be Delilah's first public outing since her kids' birth. There's no way Danny was going to allow Damian to miss that. (he swears to the ancients, if there was a rouge attack he was going to kill someone, Dark Dan's future be damned.)
Lifting his heels off the ground so he could stand on his tiptoes, Danny snagged Damian's arm and pulled him down so he could kiss his cheek. "I'll get home safe, just focus on keeping your dad from going insane. We've got a date at the zoo tomorrow and we're not missing it even if your father becomes the next city rogue."
Damian wrapped his arms around Danny, trapping him in a hug as he sighed in fond frustration. "I promise I won't miss it, ok? I'll be there."
Danny rolled his eyes and pushed Damian back, dropping back to stand on the ground, "You better, 'cause hell hath no fury like a gorilla denied the chance to meet her human best friend's boyfriend."
Damian snorted, before looking away and pretending to cough. Danny moved his textbooks to rest more securely in one of his arms, so he could point at his boyfriend. "I'm not kidding, if I show up tomorrow and tell her all about my life and you're not there, she will break out and track you down. I won't stop her either, you'd deserve whatever she does to you."
"Alright, alright. I get it, and I already promised I'd be there didn't I?" Damian chuckled, raising his hands up in surrender. Which would have been cute if it wasn't for the fact that his phone went off again, this time in an insistent buzzing. His eldest brother's ringtone; which meant Damian was going to be busy for a while.
Cursing, Damian turned and answered, "I'm in the middle of something, this better be important Grayson," glancing back at Danny, he mouthed for him to wait a moment as his brother started talking.
Smiling, Danny shook his head, snatched Damian's jacket, and started making his way out the door. There was no way Damian would finish this phone call any time soon. Danny's learned not to wait after the last four times this happened. Damian turned back with betrayed eyes, but the urgent voice of his brother buzzing even louder held him back. Waving goodbye with a smile, Danny shut the door and started making his way down the hall.
He'd have to ask Damian what happened tomorrow, Grayson didn't usually call him, especially when he knew Damian was spending time with Danny. He said it had something to do with how it was sacrilege to interrupt time spent with a significant other. Danny had wanted to ask him more about it but hadn't gotten the chance when The Riddler crashed their spontaneous meeting.
Speaking of The Riddler, Danny's social science paper wasn't looking too hot right now. He'd have to block out a time for him to work on that at some point this week. He wasn't doing anything on Friday, well, besides his early morning classes. That should work...
"Hey, Danny!" someone called, pulling him out of his musing. Glancing up, Danny internally groaned when he noticed Nancy waving at him in sheer delight. Giving her a half-hearted wave, Danny sped up and continued making his way to the back of the library. If he was quick enough maybe he could-
To his dismay, Nancy's boyfriend stepped out from behind one of the shelves and latched onto his arm. Tightly.
Just great, this is exactly what he wanted to avoid. Curse his inability to pay attention when he got lost in thought. Damn ADHD. Blasted non-existent spatial awareness. This was what he got for relying on his ghost sense, he just knows it.
"She said hi, kind of rude of you to just keep walking, Kid." Wyatt huffed, roughly dragging Danny back and towards his girlfriend. Nancy smiled brightly as Wyatt let him go, allowing Nancy to weave her arm with Danny's and practically drag him toward the front of the building.
"There's this big party going on tonight, some Jr invited us. He said it was going to be a night to remember! You should totally come with us, Danny! My friend Shela said she was bringing her nerdy freshmen too! I just know you'd fit right in with them!" Nancy squealed excitedly, shaking Danny as they finally made it to the front doors.
One of the desk attendants rolled their eyes at them as Danny glanced over, hoping that Barbara might intervene. No such luck, she was nowhere in sight, probably off somewhere shelving books. So much for that plan.
"uh, thanks, but I already-" Danny tried, stopping when Nancy scoffed and yanked him out the door and into the frosty night. "Damn, it's cold!" Wyatt cursed, taking his jacket off and quickly handing it over to Nancy. She let go of Danny and pulled it on, then stared at Danny for a moment, "Put your coat on Danny, no way in hell am I letting my kid catch a cold!"
Rolling his eyes, Danny wrapped Damian's coat over his shoulders. He was too lazy to actually put it on, not when that meant handing his textbooks over. The last time he did that, Nancy got bored and started doodling all over them. (how she had managed to do that in the little time it took to put a hoodie on, Danny wasn't sure.)
"I just want to go home, Nancy. I'm not really a party person." Danny sighed, allowing Nancy to drag him down the dark streets. His apartment was in this general direction anyway. Nancy turned to her boyfriend with a huff, "Wyatt! make him come with us!"
"Let the nerd do what he wants, it's not like it affects us if he kicks the bucket all alone," Wyatt grumbled, rolling his eyes.
Ouch, but true. Please listen to your grumpy boyfriend, please listen to your grumpy boyfriend, please listen-
"But Shela said she was bringing Carly!" Nancy turned back to Danny, a pout clear on her face, "You two would be so cute together! she's nerdy just like you! And she's totally into all those murder mystery shows you watch!"
Damn it. Not this crap again.
"That's nice, Nancy, but I'm not interested. I already told you guys, I have a boyfriend," Danny sighed, trying to gently extract his arm from hers; for a human, Nancy sure had one heck of a grip.
"Yeah, right," Wyatt snorted, patting Danny's back, completely ignoring the fact that Danny was literally wearing someone else's jacket. "We'll believe you when you introduce us, until then. You're a virgin loser."
And there we go, people; the reason Danny wanted to crawl into the sewer and die whenever he saw these two. They were nice, don't get him wrong, but they were also stubborn idiots.
"Being a virgin has nothing to do with my relationship status, Wyatt. I'm ace. you've known this since the first time we talked." Danny grumbled, allowing Nancy to drag him down another street. He wasn't sure exactly where they were going now, but he was too tired to care at this point.
If these self-claimed 'Parents' of his wanted to drag him to this stupid party, then fine. Whatever. It's not like Danny had any other plans tonight anyway.
"Asexuality isn't a thing man," Wyatt huffed, speeding up so he could guide them in the right direction now that they were heading into a rougher patch of buildings. Danny could see the man was shivering, though trying to act tough in front of Nancy. Smirking, Danny sent a cold breeze his way. The man scowled up at the sky, cursing quietly.
"Yeah!" Nancy agreed, smiling brightly down at Danny without a care in the world. Like they didn't have this conversation every other week. "You just haven't met the right person yet, Danny! And I know how awkward it is to admit that you're staying celibate until marriage, but you don't have to hide it behind being ace."
Taking a deep breath, Danny closed his eyes and focused on not shouting out of frustration. The celibate comment was new, the acephobia, not so much. "Ok, first of all; Asexuality is a thing, which many people ARE. Literally, 1% of the world is ace. That's over 70 million people. Second of all, I'm not celibate, and I'm not sure if you even know what that means, considering you know I was raised Atheist."
"What does being an Atheist have to do with celibacy?" Nancy asked, tilting her head to look at him. Danny groaned, smacking his forehead against his textbooks. He was NOT going to explain this to them tonight.
"You know what, Nancy? It doesn't matter." Danny huffed, trying again to gently pry her hands off. He wanted to go home. He wanted to cuddle with his boyfriend. He wanted to go back to Amity. Maybe go to the realms and play with Cujo. He did NOT want to deal with these idiots.
Wyatt stopped walking and turned to face them, rolling his eyes as Nancy pouted at Danny. "Come on babe, let the loser go. He obviously doesn't appreciate your efforts."
"but who else is going to convince him to live a little? He's just going to go back to his apartment and sulk by himself!" Nancy cried, tightening her grip again.
"Who cares what the kid does, Nancy? let the dude die a virgin loser. Now let's go, we're already late as is."
"But I really want him to-," Nancy tried, cutting herself off, as both she and Danny spotted a cloaked person appear out of the shadows behind Wyatt.
Wyatt lifted his brow before slowly turning to see what the two of them were staring at. The cloaked figure suddenly whacked him over the head with a metal pole before he could fully turn around. Wyatt's body dropped to the ground with a heavy thump, making Nancy scream, "Wyatt!"
Shit, Danny stepped back, trying to pull Nancy with him as the cloak dude tossed the metal pole to the side with a loud clank. Which was confusing, why would he through away his weapon?
"Shut her up!" the cloak dude cried, bending down to grab Wyatt's arms. He better not be telling Danny to do that, because that would just be stupid and- Suddenly, a dozen more cloaked people flooded out of the darkness and surrounded them. That answered Danny's questions at least.
Danny tensed up as a couple of the people tried to grab onto him. Quickly pulling Nancy back, successfully this time, Danny glanced around to try and find an exit. He couldn't do anything crazy right now, not unless he wanted to give away his secret, but some self-defense should be fine.
Nancy suddenly let go of his arm and smacked one of the cloaked people in the face, "Don't you fucking dare touch me! Wyatt! Kid, get out of here!"
Danny turned to her in alarm, eyes wide in horror as she quickly disappeared into the cloaked crowd. Another cloaked person managed to latch onto Danny's shoulder, reminding him to focus on his situation. Quickly stepping back, he slammed into the man grabbing him, knocking his grip loose. Ducking under another attempt, Danny swung out his leg and tripped the dude into two others.
Twisting to try and make his way over to where he figured Nancy was, Danny dropped his textbooks and punched someone in the face. Damian's jacket was yanked off his shoulders, making him turn with a growl. Punching another person in the face, Danny lunged at the group.
"Hurry! before the bats find us!" the supposed leader cried, making even more cloaked people surround Danny. There was no way a normal civilian would be able to fight their way out of this, so Danny would have to allow himself to be caught soon. Only after biting and scratching the fuck out of them though. Just because he had to let them catch him, doesn't mean he has to make it easy.
~30 min later
Danny stared at the leader as the man droned on and on about needing the right sacrifice for the ritual to work. Nancy and Wyatt grumbled behind him, agreements from the other kidnapped victims filling Danny's ears like bees.
"The sacrifice shall be the one who treads the veil between life and death, the one who's beloved by the spirits as their own! He shall be pale as a corpse, his body kissed by death many times throughout his life. His hair as black as the sky on a moonless night, cradled by the moon since birth." Mr. totally-read-one-fake-ritual-book-when-he-was-a-teen-and-now-has-to-make-it-everyone's-problem droned on dramatically, reverently dragging his finger down the old dusty tome's page,
"so Mr. Wayne?" Nancy huffed, pressing her back into Danny's side. Wyatt chuckled, shoving his foot into Danny's knee, "No, it's totally Mr. Drake he's talking about. Have you seen that dude's eyebags? they make him look like a ghost."
One of the strangers leaned over, rolling their eyes, "No, it's got to be Mr. Dent. The dude's literally half living half not."
"No, Two-Face is half insane, half burnt chicken. Ain't nothing about him going to please ghosts. He was a fucking lawyer, for Christ shake." another guy added.
"the dude said 'he' which crossed out half of y'all," Danny added, glancing at the group around him. The women blinked and then rolled their eyes; only in Gotham would they get kidnapped and not actually be needed.
"Assholes," Nancy huffed, she glanced over her shoulder and down at him, her face set into a frown, "You good, kid? you're like freezing cold."
"I'm fine," Danny huffed, focusing back on the leader. He could just feel the old magic rolling off the book; this was something dangerous, especially in this dipshit's hands. Ancients, he was going to have to do everything he could to keep the man from actually doing the ritual or mess it up if the bats didn't get here in time.
One of the cloaked people suddenly dragged a camera out from a side room, grumbling about networks and livestreams being shit. Huh, well that would definitely help provide their location to the bats. They must be really inexperienced cultists then...
"The sacrifice shall fall into our hands by fate's design. The sacrifice is here and waiting for what his whole life was meant for. Now-"
"Elder!" one of the other cloaked figures cried, waving their phone in the air in excitement. Dread quickly filled Danny's stomach.
"All the bats and birds are busy dealing with those scoundrels they call rouges! If we hurry, we can complete the ritual before they can interfere!"
"Perfect!" Mr. 'Elder', cheered, slamming the tome closed and handing it off to one of the others. "So?" Mr. Elder started, turning to face them with a sharp grin, "Who's it going to be?"
Danny glanced at the group behind him, all of them having gone silent as the cloaked group started pulling out their ritual things, one of which was a very blood-stained knife.
Mr. Elder started circling them, humming and hawing as he studied each one of them. He stopped next to Wyatt, studying him intently.
Quickly weighing his options, Danny straightened up and glared at the man, "I'll be your sacrifice."
Immediately Nancy leaned away from him with a gasp, Wyatt's foot dropping to the floor with a thud. "Danny, no!" Nancy hissed, turning her body so she could face him. Danny didn't glance at her, just continued glaring at the cultist. The cult leader laughed, "Well then. So it shall be! You heard the sacrifice, tie him to the chair!"
With everyone watching, all Danny could do was tense as four of the followers walked over and pulled him up. "No!" Nancy shouted, leaning over and grabbing onto him. Wyatt reached out to Nancy, wanting to pull her back. The men tensed up, ready to interfere. Quickly pulling back, Danny frowned at Nancy and Wyatt, "I'll be ok, just don't do anything stupid!"
They harshly pulled him up and away again, before Nancy could reply. And because he was already pissed off, he made it as difficult for them as possible as they dragged him to the wooden chair. The camera person focused the lens on them, recording it as they shoved him down to sit and wrapped a bloody rope around his limbs.
So much for thinking they were inexperienced... They've done this before, he knows now. How many times? He wasn't sure, but if he had any say in it after tonight, they'd never do it again.
Once he was securely tied to the chair and gagged, because Danny couldn't help himself but insult them, the cultist started preparing the ritual. Why they hadn't done so beforehand, Danny wasn't sure; that is until one of them sliced a deep gash into his right arm and collected his blood into a bowl.
With a grimace, Danny watched as they mixed his blood with black paint and started drawing a circle around him. The camera dude stepped closer and practically shoved the camera into his face. leaning back, Danny glanced between the camera and the people drawing with his blood.
Suddenly, his arm tingled with ectoplasm, making him panic for a second. he can't heal the wound! not with all the people around him and being recorded! Shit, what had Vlad done last time?? Uh, right! core smothering. He could just smother his core to stop his body from healing. Man, acting like a civilian was a pain in the ass.
Glaring up at the camera now that he wasn't as panicked, Danny watched as the dude stepped back, pulled out a paper, and started reading out loud. "GOTHAM! tonight you shall join us as we summon the most powerful being in the world!"
Did he seriously need the paper just to remember that?
The leader stepped forward when the circle was complete, "Now!" His voice echoed around the silent warehouse, startling the other kidnapped victims. The cameraman turned and focused on him, stepping out of the circle altogether. Danny watched the kidnapped people out of the corner of his eye, wanting to make sure they weren't hurt during this whole fiasco.
"Let us begin!" the leader cheered, suddenly gripping Danny's shoulders tightly. "Join me as we summon our lord and savior! The great tyrant of the dead! The embodiment of war and bloodshed! The one named PARIAH DARK! THE HORRIFIC GHOST KING!!!!"
Immediately, Danny was both completely terrified and amused. He had been worried that they were going to try and summon some great evil demon, not the fucking old tyrant. He could fight Pariah any day of the week.
No, what terrified him was the fact that because Danny won the right to the crown by defeating Pariah the first time, he had no idea what this summoning was going to do. Was it going to work like they wanted and summon Pariah? cool, great even. He can deal with that, might have to reveal his ghost powers if the fight got dirty, but nothing too bad.
or was it going to summon him because he was the king, and if so? how? Would that even work considering he's the sacrifice? would he just disappear and reappear? This could lead to a lot of questions Danny was NOT ready to answer. Gaslighting everyone here into believing he could fight Pariah as a 'meta' human would be easy, convincing everyone that he's not the ghost king or a ghost AFTER getting summoned; not so easy.
The leader released Danny from his grip as he walked over and snatched the tome from one of his followers. Snapping the book open, the man started chanting without warning, pointing at random people to notify them when it was their turn to start.
It was like watching a school play; all the student's doing as they were taught as their teacher directed from the side. Cultist A slammed the bowl of leftover blood on the ground, splattering the black remnants all over Danny and the circle. Which was gross, Danny was going to have to burn this shirt, because there was no way he was going to get this stain out. Cultist B tossed salt at Danny a few minutes later, smacking him in the face with the small white crystals. Shaking his head, Danny glared at him. Cultist B threw the salt again.
The leader's smile grew as he continued chanting.
Seven other cultists joined in the chanting, waving their hands up and down as their voices echoed around them. Danny glanced nervously around the warehouse, hoping he'd spot one of the bats. This was being broadcast, they should be on their way at the very least.
After another minute of looking, Danny glanced back at the other kidnapped victims. Nancy was balling her eyes out, burying herself into her boyfriend's chest. Wyatt was staring at him with wide eyes, clearly unsure about what to do. Probably feeling guilty because they both knew the leader was going to choose him. A few others were looking away, clearly fearing for his life. The rest watched on, trying to show him through their actions that they were there with him till the end. (whether he 'died' or not)
It was weird, but Danny had to give it to them; Gothmites were badass. He doubted anyone in Amity besides his friends would have been brave enough to watch what was happening. Even if they didn't know if he would live or not.
His core crackled, making him choke a little as he finally felt the pull of the summoning. Well, that's just great. Shaking his head, Danny tried to clear his throat. The summoning was making him feel weird and he did not appreciate it.
The chanting got louder as one of the people walked up to him, holding the knife in a white-knuckled grasp. Danny eyed it wearily, glancing between it and the rafters above. Where the hell were the bats when he needed them???
The cultist kneeled before him and raised the blade, slamming it down into his chest right as the leader stopped chanting; Danny gasped, more out of surprise than pain as he stared at the knife. The dude gave him no warning that he was going to stab him. Usually, cultists slit people's throats, right? What the fuck was up with stabbing him???
His blood slowly bubbled up and around the knife, slowly staining his shirt red. Yeah, there was no way in the realms he was going to be able to save this shirt now. Man, he had liked this one too.
He could hear Nancy's sobs turn to wails as the cultist yanked out the knife and handed it to the leader, who Danny just now noticed had joined them in the circle. His blood started gushing down his chest with every beat of his heart, again he held back his core. (what does he do now??? faint? scream? how do normal people react to getting stabbed?????)
"Take this lowly sacrifice as a sign of our eternal loyalty, and grace us with your presence! Your humble servants plead that your godly ears hear our prayers! Join us in this mortal realm and bequeath us your power and name to rectify the sins of our brethren!"
Ok, first of all Danny was no where near lowly you piece of fuck-
Danny's core pulsed, sending out nauseating pain up and down his spine. Gasping, Danny leaned as far forward as he could, trying in vain to grasp at his chest without using his powers. His core crackled, striking a blinding flash through his brain. The echoes of his death crawled up his left arm, waking the old dead nerves into firing signals at his brain.
Danny couldn't help himself, he screamed as the pain grew worse and worse. His thoughts turned hazy, his body cold as his core pulsed again. His heart stuttered and then froze, his core flooding his body with freezing ecto not a moment later. Absently, he could feel the wash of ectoplasm crawl over his body, changing his body minutely. He didn't transform, but he definitely looked more ghostly than human.
All the pain disappeared a moment later, allowing Danny to slump forward, his head hanging low and blocking his face from view. His chest did not rise in ragged breaths, nor did his fingers twitch with life. His mind was still sluggish and clouded with something, making it nearly impossible to think. Squeezing his eyes shut, Danny tried to focus.
"Your Highness?" someone asked, their voice too loud as it rang in Danny's ears. His core pulsed, another flood of ectoplasm flooding his body. His eyes slid open again, allowing him to see the green glow lighting up his chest and lap as he stared down at them.
Slowly, Danny lifted his head, his bright green gaze locking with the man in front of him.
Next
#dpxdc#dcxdp#dp x dc#dc x dp#damian wayne#danny fenton#deadserious#mentioned#sam manson#tucker foley#everyone is confused#Danny is phantoms host#or so the JL and damian believe#danny accidently tricked them into thinking it#but it's such a good cover story that he's not sure if he should correct this mistake#danny phantom#part one#the eyes of death Au#tw: acephobia#it's there but not like the point of the story#it's for plot reasons#ignore how crappy i am at romance#it's not really my style#but i'm trying
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call me if you're lonelyâĄ
old man!logan howlett x phone sex hotline worker!reader
cw: dirty talk, mutual masturbation
author's note: very short. just an idea that came to mind.
masterlist


this is so desperate, logan thought to himself as he dialed the number written on the fourth page in the second column. in pretty cursive words it read, call me if you're lonely!
your number had been living in the back of his head for almost a month now but he never got this close to calling it. in the column, it's written that you are a college student working on your masters degree and that you are very popular within your profession as a phone sex hotline worker. honestly, logan didn't care if you just started yesterday. he's been so stressed and overworked lately that he needs a release soon. logan waited as the phone rang after entering his card information. he's sat up on the old mattress under him, waiting patiently to see if anyone answers.
on the third ring, someone picks up.
"thanks for calling, hush hotline." you say, giving him the typical welcome speech before jumping straight in. "what would ya' like me to call you tonight, sugar?"
the sweet tone in your voice made logan's boxers feel tighter. resting his hand on top of his heavy cock, squeezing lightly and slowly stroking himself over the thin material.
"james is fine, honey." logan mutters.
"i like the way you call me, honey." you purr, getting relaxed in bed.
you had a long day; woke up late, missed class, messed up during important meeting at work and needed to blow off some steam. normally, the people you talk to over the phone don't have an effect on you, instead opting to fake it and offer phony pornstar like moans but something made you want to give it another shot.
"is that so?"
the stranger's voice was rough around the edges. deep, cold, straight to the point. it sent a shiver up your spine. usually, your customers were weak. willing to give into your every word and fully submit to you.
"mhm," you hum, lightly running your fingers up and down your thigh. "so, what's gotcha call in tonight, james? rough day at work or you just wanna hear me touch myself for you?"
"bit of both." he was already lost in this little world between the two of you.
âaw, canât wait to make you feel good." you tell him, playing with the lace of your underwear. "wanna hear what i'm wearing right now?"
"mhm." he grunts.
"a white t-shirt and lacy blue underwear. wish you were here to take them off of me." you sigh, slipping your hand under the waistband.
"what would you do if i was there right now?"
"hmm, think i'd start by kissing you, making sure you get nice and hard for me then i would beg you to fuck my tight throat for hours. are you hard for me right now?"
"y-yes." logan sighs, trying to slow down a bit.
"that's sweet, james. got me blushing just thinkin' about it." you run your middle finger through your folds, gathering the slick and circling your button a couple times.
"just blushing?" he teases, catching you off guard.
"not 'just blushing'." you giggle softly. "you also got me r-reallyâah, fuck! really soaked."
logan could hear the obscene squeak of you dipping your fingers inside of yourself. his chest moves up and down at the same rhythm as his strokes. your pretty little gasps made it difficult for him not to release right away.
"s-shit, honey." he groans, listening to the small wet slaps of you fucking yourself. "wanna taste that pussy of yours. i'm sure it's as sweet as that fuckin' mouth you got on you, honey."
never have you actually gotten wet from the men that call you. most of them let you do all the talking, only offering moans and whimpers. you couldn't quite place a finger on it but something about james was doing it for you.
"w-wish it was you inside of me instead of my fingers." you whine, tickling the spot that makes your vision blur.
"bet you would look so pretty wrapped around my cock, honey."
"i would look even prettier with you dripping out of me." faintly, you can hear him shuffling around, trying to stifle his groans. "don't hide yourself, baby. wanna hear you."
like a rubber band, something snapped inside of logan. unable to control his noises anymore, he's fucking his fist faster than before, chasing after every little moan you let out.
you move to rubbing your button switching occasionally, picturing the man that you believe james to be. a little older and rugged. maybe even someone your father would be friends with. someone you would definitely have a secret crush on.
logan's hips thrusted with need. the louder you got, the faster his orgasm was approaching. he had to hold off, he thought to himself. hear you cum first. by the broken whines and little hiccups you let out, he could tell you were only moments away from your release.
"f-fuck, i'm so close." you squeal, legs shaking a little as you near your high.
"me too, honey."
within seconds, your head is thrown back against the silky pillow case. the sheets under you were drenched but you were too full of bliss to care. logan finally allowed himself to let go as well, pearly white spurts coating his lower stomach and even some landing on his tank top. it's quiet for a minute or so before your little giggles can be heard on the other end of the line.
"something funny?" he asks, confused.
"no, no, it's just..." you giggle again with a sigh. "ever since i started this job, no one's ever made me orgasm. at least not like that."
"hm.." logan couldn't fight off the smile creeping on his face. "might need to call more often then."
"i'll be looking forward to it."
#logan howlett x reader#wolverine x reader#logan howlett#james logan howlett#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#logan howlett smut#wolverine smut#hugh jackman wolverine#wolverine angst#logan howlett imagine#logan howlett fanfiction#logan x reader#logan howlett x you#logan wolverine#old man logan#old man logan x reader#old man!logan#wolverine fluff#wolverine one shot#wolverine x oc#marvel cinematic universe#marvel#mcu#marvel mcu#x men#x men comics#x men movies#x men wolverine#hugh jackman
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Logan is submissive like a dog is submissive to his master. He revels in the attention you give him, feeds off it. Greedy man he is, he'll take and take, and never will he be satisfied. Your love, your adoration, your infatuationâall fuel to add to the fire that is his devotion. You say jump, he says how high.
Of course you never know how good you've got him trained until it really counts.
The only thing standing between you and a group of men is all six feet of your boyfriend, leering at the assholes who were harassing you on your way homeâonly leering because your sonorous voice begs him not to hurt them.
Even the sight of their scared expressions isn't enough to satisfy him. True satisfaction would be him using the men as punching bags, but not if it would upset you; as much as he wanted to rip them apart, you were reason enough not to.
It was his fault in the first place, he should've been here to protect you. Your voice begs againâ "Don't do it, they're not worth it." And you make him believe it, teeth bared as a warning, but slowly backing away. "Get the fuck out of here before I change my mind," he growls, and they all scatter like mice. Your hands stroke his arm, not stopping until you see his shoulders slowly untense. He lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding, then looks at you. "I'm sorry," he says, pulling you close. "You have nothing to be sorry about," you say, and he can't bring himself to argue. Not when you look up at him like the sun. "For a second there I thought you were gonna take their heads off," you chuckle, leading him to the front door. "I was." "Stop joking Loganâ" "I'm not." Your eyebrow raises, having already stepped inside your shared apartment. Before you can protest he descends upon you, holding your neck as to deepen the kiss further. Your lungs burn, allowed a second of reprieve, then returns to kissing you again. "I'm not joking," he gasps. "Best thing in my life, I'd fuckin' kill for you." The way his lips leave you dizzy, you believe every word.
#robo writes#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#wolverine#wolverine x reader#a little bit of writing practice#as a treat#man this isnt smut but i was VERY tempted
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Beyond The Bat
(Neglected reader x Yandere batfam)
Chapter 1: In The Shadows
TW!!! Cursing !!Dark AU!!
Living in the Wayne manor isn't the sweet luxurious dream you'd think it'd be, reality is in fact much crueler. For as long as I could remember I had lived in this dreary mansion, but lived isn't the word I'd use. I was more trapped here if anything. My "family", if I could even call them that, are well respected people. They're highly skilled and talented people, someone like me could only dream to be like them. I tried so hard to get close to them, I really did try, but no matter what I did nothing worked. I did everything, gymnastics, martial arts, theater, art, music, coding, dance, volleyball, cheerleading, heck I was even in the honors society. Despite being an A+ student and a role model in high society they never once went to any of my recitals, games, or showcases. I went to galas all alone, I had to deal with the sneering faces and snide remarks of high class men and woman alone since I was 8. Not very safe for a child huh? I didn't think so either but my "father" doesn't seem to care.
Nevertheless, I have no choice in this matter and it's not like life here is unbearable. Sure I get beatings and tongue lashings every now and then, but for the most part everyone in the manor tends to forget me eventually and leave me alone. It's pretty isolating but I got used to it, after all I have duties to perform. I have my job as Student council president and I don't intend to slack off. I got that job with my own blood sweat and tears and I will not let all those sleepless nights go to waste. I don't have time to wallow in self pity I have countless of students looking up to me and counting on me to do my job.
"Young master, are you okay? You seem to be staring off into space."
I looked up to our old butler, his face jaded and littered with wrinkles that seemed to contort pathetically in worry. I knew better than to accept his pity. He seems to be a wise gentle man on the outside with his elegant wardrobe, worn old body, and soft spoken demeanor, but do not be fooled. In truth, Alfred Pennyworth was a foolish coward. This was the same man who abandoned his own daughter just like my idiot of a father. I gave him a chance, but nothing's been the same since the day he accidentally called me Julia. I was nothing but a stand in for him, someone to relieve his guilt with.
"I'm fine. Don't you have something better to do? I'm sure Bruce has some kind of task for you, no need to bother yourself with my problems"
"...Very well then...Take care of yourself young master."
He clearly had something more to say but he decided to do nothing and walk away. Like I said he's a coward. Still I'm not new to disappointment, whether it's the disappointment of missed birthdays or the way they all see me as the disappointment, it's nothing I haven't experienced before. I quickly packed up my things and headed to school. Sure riding to school on an old worn out bike isn't exactly ideal, but I have to deal with what I have. Although, I do have to take some back alleys to school since I don't want anyone seeing and starting a scandal. I can already see the blaring headlines, "Daughter of Gotham's richest man caught riding to school on a beat up bicycle!". What a bunch of nosy bastards.
"Good mornin' (Y/N)!"
I turned to face the sunny senior calling my name, his unadulterated joy making him stand out in the crowd of groggy gothamites.
"Good morning Cyrus."
My crisp responses never seems to deter the boy as he continues to walk beside me chattering endlessly.
"(Y/N) I got things you asked! It's super cool what you're doing for the school, I'm so happy I get to be apart of it! If you ever need help with anything please do ask me!"
I sighed, his joyful energy was contagious. I couldn't help but crack a smile. Though it quickly disappeared as I regained my composure, but obviously not fast enough since Cyrus' joy seems to only be growing.
"Ahhhhh (Y/N) just smiled! I made the student president smile! I'm so sigma"
Here he goes again with those weird words and that cocky grin. I sighed once again, I'm too tired for this.
"Yes thank you Cyrus get to class now, I'll pick up the things I asked for after school."
"Yes ma'am!"
I watched as he playfully saluted and ran to class almost bumping into several people along the way. I facepalmed, he was such a handful but strangely I don't really mind. It's probably the lack of sleep I'll make sure to go to bed early today, for now I have to get to class myself.
Author's note: Omg chapter one is finally out! This took me a lot longer than expected but I hope it's good I went through a tiny writer's blockđ
. I hope you guys like Cyrus I tried to make him a silly and sunny character but trust me he'll have lore and be a much deeper character. I also tried making (Y/N)'s backstory pretty vague since they're the narrator and I figured they wouldn't like talking about it, but their lore will be revealed more throughout future chapters. Anyways as always thank you all for reading and have a good day/night!
Credits to khaer for the dividers
@simpingpandas @rosalietodd013 @sirenetheblogger @cim0nnin @00hellohello00 @crazycaoticsimp @lovebug-apple @youdontknowshtaboutfk
#x reader#yandere batfam#batfam#neglected reader#yandere batboys#yandere batfam x neglected reader#yandere platonic#barbara gordon#batman#bruce wayne#dick grayson#jason todd#damian wayne#stephanie brown#cassandra cain#alfred pennyworth#tim drake
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âDisenshittify or Dieâ
youtube
I'm coming to BURNING MAN! On TUESDAY (Aug 27) at 1PM, I'm giving a talk called "DISENSHITTIFY OR DIE!" at PALENQUE NORTE (7&E). On WEDNESDAY (Aug 28) at NOON, I'm doing a "Talking Caterpillar" Q&A at LIMINAL LABS (830&C).
Last weekend, I traveled to Las Vegas for Defcon 32, where I had the immense privilege of giving a solo talk on Track 1, entitled "Disenshittify or die! How hackers can seize the means of computation and build a new, good internet that is hardened against our asshole bosses' insatiable horniness for enshittification":
https://info.defcon.org/event/?id=54861
This was a followup to last year's talk, "An Audacious Plan to Halt the Internet's Enshittification," a talk that kicked off a lot of international interest in my analysis of platform decay ("enshittification"):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rimtaSgGz_4
The Defcon organizers have earned a restful week or two, and that means that the video of my talk hasn't yet been posted to Defcon's Youtube channel, so in the meantime, I thought I'd post a lightly edited version of my speech crib. If you're headed to Burning Man, you can hear me reprise this talk at Palenque Norte (7&E); I'm kicking off their lecture series on Tuesday, Aug 27 at 1PM.
==
What the fuck happened to the old, good internet?
I mean, sure, our bosses were a little surveillance-happy, and they were usually up for sharing their data with the NSA, and whenever there was a tossup between user security and growth, it was always YOLO time.
But Google Search used to work. Facebook used to show you posts from people you followed. Uber used to be cheaper than a taxi and pay the driver more than a cabbie made. Amazon used to sell products, not Shein-grade self-destructing dropshipped garbage from all-consonant brands. Apple used to defend your privacy, rather than spying on you with your no-modifications-allowed Iphone.
There was a time when you searching for an album on Spotify would get you that album â not a playlist of insipid AI-generated covers with the same name and art.
Microsoft used to sell you software â sure, it was buggy â but now they just let you access apps in the cloud, so they can watch how you use those apps and strip the features you use the most out of the basic tier and turn them into an upcharge.
What â and I cannot stress this enough â the fuck happened?!
Iâm talking about enshittification.
Hereâs what enshittification looks like from the outside: First, you see a company thatâs being good to its end users. Google puts the best search results at the top; Facebook shows you a feed of posts from people and groups you followl; Uber charges small dollars for a cab; Amazon subsidizes goods and returns and shipping and puts the best match for your product search at the top of the page.
Thatâs stage one, being good to end users. But thereâs another part of this stage, call it stage 1a). Thatâs figuring out how to lock in those users.
Thereâs so many ways to lock in users.
If youâre Facebook, the users do it for you. You joined Facebook because there were people there you wanted to hang out with, and other people joined Facebook to hang out with you.
Thatâs the old ânetwork effectsâ in action, and with network effects come âthe collective action problem." Because you love your friends, but goddamn are they a pain in the ass! You all agree that FB sucks, sure, but can you all agree on when itâs time to leave?
No way.
Can you agree on where to go next?
Hell no.
Youâre there because thatâs where the support group for your rare disease hangs out, and your bestie is there because thatâs where they talk with the people in the country they moved away from, then thereâs that friend who coordinates their kidâs little league car pools on FB, and the best dungeon master you know isnât gonna leave FB because thatâs where her customers are.
So youâre stuck, because even though FB use comes at a high cost â your privacy, your dignity and your sanity â thatâs still less than the switching cost youâd have to bear if you left: namely, all those friends who have taken you hostage, and whom you are holding hostage
Now, sometimes companies lock you in with money, like Amazon getting you to prepay for a yearâs shipping with Prime, or to buy your Audible books on a monthly subscription, which virtually guarantees that every shopping search will start on Amazon, after all, youâve already paid for it.
Sometimes, they lock you in with DRM, like HP selling you a printer with four ink cartridges filled with fluid that retails for more than $10,000/gallon, and using DRM to stop you from refilling any of those ink carts or using a third-party cartridge. So when one cart runs dry, you have to refill it or throw away your investment in the remaining three cartridges and the printer itself.
Sometimes, itâs a grab bag:
You canât run your Ios apps without Apple hardware;
you canât run your Apple music, books and movies on anything except an Ios app;
your iPhone uses parts pairing â DRM handshakes between replacement parts and the main system â so you canât use third-party parts to fix it; and
every OEM iPhone part has a microscopic Apple logo engraved on it, so Apple can demand that the US Customs and Border Service seize any shipment of refurb Iphone parts as trademark violations.
Think Different, amirite?
Getting you locked in completes phase one of the enshittification cycle and signals the start of phase two: making things worse for you to make things better for business customers.
For example, a platform might poison its search results, like Google selling more and more of its results pages to ads that are identified with lighter and lighter tinier and tinier type.
Or Amazon selling off search results and calling it an âadâ business. They make $38b/year on this scam. The first result for your search is, on average, 29% more expensive than the best match for your search. The first row is 25% more expensive than the best match. On average, the best match for your search is likely to be found seventeen places down on the results page.
Other platforms sell off your feed, like Facebook, which started off showing you the things you asked to see, but now the quantum of content from the people you follow has dwindled to a homeopathic residue, leaving a void that Facebook fills with things that people pay to show you: boosted posts from publishers you havenât subscribed to, and, of course, ads.
Now at this point you might be thinking âsure, if youâre not paying for the product, youâre the product.'
Bullshit!
Bull.
Shit.
The people who buy those Google ads? They pay more every year for worse ad-targeting and more ad-fraud
Those publishers paying to nonconsensually cram their content into your Facebook feed? They have to do that because FB suppresses their ability to reach the people who actually subscribed to them
The Amazon sellers with the best match for your query have to outbid everyone else just to show up on the first page of results. It costs so much to sell on Amazon that between 45-51% of every dollar an independent seller brings in has to be kicked up to Don Bezos and the Amazon crime family. Those sellers donât have the kind of margins that let them pay 51% They have to raise prices in order to avoid losing money on every sale.
"But wait!" I hear you say!
[Come on, say it!]
"But wait! Things on Amazon arenât more expensive that things at Target, or Walmart, or at a mom and pop store, or direct from the manufacturer.
"How can sellers be raising prices on Amazon if the price at Amazon is the same as at is everywhere else?"
[Any guesses?!]
Thatâs right, they charge more everywhere. They have to. Amazon binds its sellers to a policy called âmost favored nation status,â which says they canât charge more on Amazon than they charge elsewhere, including direct from their own factory store.
So every seller that wants to sell on Amazon has to raise their prices everywhere else.
Now, these sellers are Amazonâs best customers. Theyâre paying for the product, and theyâre still getting screwed.
Paying for the product doesnât fill your vapid bossâs shriveled heart with so much joy that he decides to stop trying to think of ways to fuck you over.
Look at Apple. Remember when Apple offered every Ios user a one-click opt out for app-based surveillance? And 96% of users clicked that box?
(The other four percent were either drunk or Facebook employees or drunk Facebook employees.)
That cost Facebook at least ten billion dollars per year in lost surveillance revenue?
I mean, you love to see it.
But did you know that at the same time Apple started spying on Ios users in the same way that Facebook had been, for surveillance data to use to target users for its competing advertising product?
Your Iphone isnât an ad-supported gimme. You paid a thousand fucking dollars for that distraction rectangle in your pocket, and youâre still the product. Whatâs more, Apple has rigged Ios so that you canât mod the OS to block its spying.
If youâre not not paying for the product, youâre the product, and if you are paying for the product, youâre still the product.
Just ask the farmers who are expected to swap parts into their own busted half-million dollar, mission-critical tractors, but canât actually use those parts until a technician charges them $200 to drive out to the farm and type a parts pairing unlock code into their console.
John Deereâs not giving away tractors. Give John Deere a half mil for a tractor and you will be the product.
Please, my brothers and sisters in Christ. Please! Stop saying âif youâre not paying for the product, youâre the product.â
OK, OK, so thatâs phase two of enshittification.
Phase one: be good to users while locking them in.
Phase two: screw the users a little to you can good to business customers while locking them in.
Phase three: screw everybody and take all the value for yourself. Leave behind the absolute bare minimum of utility so that everyone stays locked into your pile of shit.
Enshittification: a tragedy in three acts.
Thatâs what enshittification looks like from the outside, but whatâs going on inside the company? What is the pathological mechanism? What sci-fi entropy ray converts the excellent and useful service into a pile of shit?
That mechanism is called twiddling. Twiddling is when someone alters the back end of a service to change how its business operates, changing prices, costs, search ranking, recommendation criteria and other foundational aspects of the system.
Digital platforms are a twiddlerâs utopia. A grocer would need an army of teenagers with pricing guns on rollerblades to reprice everything in the building when someone arrives whoâs extra hungry.
Whereas the McDonaldâs Investments portfolio company Plexure advertises that it can use surveillance data to predict when an app user has just gotten paid so the seller can tack an extra couple bucks onto the price of their breakfast sandwich.
And of course, as the prophet William Gibson warned us, âcyberspace is everting.' With digital shelf tags, grocers can change prices whenever they feel like, like the grocers in Norway, whose e-ink shelf tags change the prices 2,000 times per day.
Every Uber driver is offered a different wage for every job. If a driver has been picky lately, the job pays more. But if the driver has been desperate enough to grab every ride the app offers, the pay goes down, and down, and down.
The law professor Veena Dubal calls this âalgorithmic wage discrimination.' Itâs a prime example of twiddling.
Every youtuber knows what itâs like to be twiddled. You work for weeks or months, spend thousands of dollars to make a video, then the algorithm decides that no one â not your own subscribers, not searchers who type in the exact name of your video â will see it.
Why? Who knows? The algorithmâs rules are not public.
Because content moderation is the last redoubt of security through obscurit: they canât tell you what the como algorithm is downranking because then youâd cheat.
Youtube is the kind of shitty boss who docks every paycheck for all the rules youâve broken, but wonât tell you what those rules were, lest you figure out how to break those rules next time without your boss catching you.
Twiddling can also work in some usersâ favor, of course. Sometimes platforms twiddle to make things better for end users or business customers.
For example, Emily Baker-White from Forbes revealed the existence of a back-end feature that Tiktokâs management can access they call the âheating tool.â
When a manager applies the heating toll to a performerâs account, that performerâs videos are thrust into the feeds of millions of users, without regard to whether the recommendation algorithm predicts they will enjoy that video.
Why would they do this? Well, hereâs an analogy from my boyhood I used to go to this traveling fair that would come to Toronto at the end of every summer, the Canadian National Exhibition. If youâve been to a fair like the Ex, you know that you can always spot some guy lugging around a comedically huge teddy bear.
Nominally, you win that teddy bear by throwing five balls in a peach-basket, but to a first approximation, no one has ever gotten five balls to stay in that peach-basket.
That guy âwonâ the teddy bear when a carny on the midway singled him out and said, "fella, I like your face. Tell you what Iâm gonna do: You get just one ball in the basket and Iâll give you this keychain, and if you amass two keychains, Iâll let you trade them in for one of these galactic-scale teddy-bears."
Thatâs how the guy got his teddy bear, which he now has to drag up and down the midway for the rest of the day.
Why the hell did that carny give away the teddy bear? Because it turns the guy into a walking billboard for the midway games. If that dopey-looking Judas Goat can get five balls into a peach basket, then so can you.
Except you canât.
Tiktokâs heating tool is a way to give away tactical giant teddy bears. When someone in the TikTok brain trust decides they need more sports bros on the platform, they pick one bro out at random and make him king for the day, heating the shit out of his account.
That guy gets a bazillion views and he starts running around on all the sports bro forums trumpeting his success: *I am the Louis Pasteur of sports bro influencers!"
The other sports bros pile in and start retooling to make content that conforms to the idiosyncratic Tiktok format. When they fail to get giant teddy bears of their own, they assume that itâs because theyâre doing Tiktok wrong, because they donât know about the heating tool.
But then comes the day when the TikTok Star Chamber decides they need to lure in more astrologers, so they take the heat off that one lucky sports bro, and start heating up some lucky astrologer.
Giant teddy bears are all over the place: those Uber drivers who were boasting to the NYT ten years ago about earning $50/hour? The Substackers who were rolling in dough? Joe Rogan and his hundred million dollar Spotify payout? Those people are all the proud owners of giant teddy bears, and theyâre a steal.
Because every dollar they get from the platform turns into five dollars worth of free labor from suckers who think they just internetting wrong.
Giant teddy bears are just one way of twiddling. Platforms can play games with every part of their business logic, in highly automated ways, that allows them to quickly and efficiently siphon value from end users to business customers and back again, hiding the pea in a shell game conducted at machine speeds, until theyâve got everyone so turned around that they take all the value for themselves.
Thatâs the how: How the platforms do the trick where they are good to users, then lock users in, then maltreat users to be good to business customers, then lock in those business customers, then take all the value for themselves.
So now we know what is happening, and how it is happening, all thatâs left is why itâs happening.
Now, on the one hand, the why is pretty obvious. The less value that end-users and business customers capture, the more value there is left to divide up among the shareholders and the executives.
Thatâs why, but it doesnât tell you why now. Companies could have done this shit at any time in the past 20 years, but they didnât. Or at least, the successful ones didnât. The ones that turned themselves into piles of shit got treated like piles of shit. We avoided them and they died.
Remember Myspace? Yahoo Search? Livejournal? Sure, theyâre still serving some kind of AI slop or programmatic ad junk if you hit those domains, but theyâre gone.
And thereâs the clue: It used to be that if you enshittified your product, bad things happened to your company. Now, there are no consequences for enshittification, so everyoneâs doing it.
Letâs break that down: What stops a company from enshittifying?
There are four forces that discipline tech companies. The first one is, obviously, competition.
If your customers find it easy to leave, then you have to worry about them leaving
Many factors can contribute to how hard or easy it is to depart a platform, like the network effects that Facebook has going for it. But the most important factor is whether there is anywhere to go.
Back in 2012, Facebook bought Insta for a billion dollars. That may seem like chump-change in these days of eleven-digit Big Tech acquisitions, but that was a big sum in those innocent days, and it was an especially big sum to pay for Insta. The company only had 13 employees, and a mere 25 million registered users.
But what mattered to Zuckerberg wasnât how many users Insta had, it was where those users came from.
[Does anyone know where those Insta users came from?]
Thatâs right, they left Facebook and joined Insta. They were sick of FB, even though they liked the people there, they hated creepy Zuck, they hated the platform, so they left and they didnât come back.
So Zuck spent a cool billion to recapture them, A fact he put in writing in a midnight email to CFO David Ebersman, explaining that he was paying over the odds for Insta because his users hated him, and loved Insta. So even if they quit Facebook (the platform), they would still be captured Facebook (the company).
Now, on paper, Zuckâs Instagram acquisition is illegal, but normally, that would be hard to stop, because youâd have to prove that he bought Insta with the intention of curtailing competition.
But in this case, Zuck tripped over his own dick: he put it in writing.
But Obamaâs DoJ and FTC just let that one slide, following the pro-monopoly policies of Reagan, Bush I, Clinton and Bush II, and setting an example that Trump would follow, greenlighting gigamergers like the catastrophic, incestuous Warner-Discovery marriage.
Indeed, for 40 years, starting with Carter, and accelerating through Reagan, the US has encouraged monopoly formation, as an official policy, on the grounds that monopolies are âefficient.â
If everyone is using Google Search, thatâs something we should celebrate. It means theyâve got the very best search and wouldnât it be perverse to spend public funds to punish them for making the best product?
But as we all know, Google didnât maintain search dominance by being best. They did it by paying bribes. More than 20 billion per year to Apple alone to be the default Ios search, plus billions more to Samsung, Mozilla, and anyone else making a product or service with a search-box on it, ensuring that you never stumble on a search engine thatâs better than theirs.
Which, in turn, ensured that no one smart invested big in rival search engines, even if they were visibly, obviously superior. Why bother making something better if Googleâs buying up all the market oxygen before it can kindle your product to life?
Facebook, Google, Microsoft, Amazon â theyâre not âmaking thingsâ companies, theyâre âbuying thingsâ companies, taking advantage of official tolerance for anticompetitive acquisitions, predatory pricing, market distorting exclusivity deals and other acts specifically prohibited by existing antitrust law.
Their goal is to become too big to fail, because that makes them too big to jail, and that means they can be too big to care.
Which is why Google Search is a pile of shit and everything on Amazon is dropshipped garbage that instantly disintegrates in a cloud of offgassed volatile organic compounds when you open the box.
Once companies no longer fear losing your business to a competitor, itâs much easier for them to treat you badly, because whatâre you gonna do?
Remember Lily Tomlin as Ernestine the AT&T operator in those old SNL sketches? âWe donât care. We donât have to. Weâre the phone company.â
Competition is the first force that serves to discipline companies and the enshittificatory impulses of their leadership, and we just stopped enforcing competition law.
It takes a special kind of smooth-brained asshole â that is, an establishment economist â to insist that the collapse of every industry from eyeglasses to vitamin C into a cartel of five or fewer companies has nothing to do with policies that officially encouraged monopolization.
Itâs like we used to put down rat poison and we didnât have a rat problem. Then these dickheads convinced us that rats were good for us and we stopped putting down rat poison, and now rats are gnawing our faces off and theyâre all running around saying, "Whoâs to say where all these rats came from? Maybe it was that we stopped putting down poison, but maybe itâs just the Time of the Rats. The Great Forces of History bearing down on this moment to multiply rats beyond all measure!"
Antitrust didnât slip down that staircase and fall spine-first on that stiletto: they stabbed it in the back and then they pushed it.
And when they killed antitrust, they also killed regulation, the second force that disciplines companies. Regulation is possible, but only when the regulator is more powerful than the regulated entities. When a company is bigger than the government, it gets damned hard to credibly threaten to punish that company, no matter what its sins.
Thatâs what protected IBM for all those years when it had its boot on the throat of the American tech sector. Do you know, the DOJ fought to break up IBM in the courts from 1970-1982, and that every year, for 12 consecutive years, IBM spent more on lawyers to fight the USG than the DOJ Antitrust Division spent on all the lawyers fighting every antitrust case in the entire USA?
IBM outspent Uncle Sam for 12 years. People called it âAntitrustâs Vietnam.â All that money paid off, because by 1982, the president was Ronald Reagan, a man whose official policy was that monopolies were âefficient." So he dropped the case, and Big Blue wriggled off the hook.
Itâs hard to regulate a monopolist, and itâs hard to regulate a cartel. When a sector is composed of hundreds of competing companies, they compete. They genuinely fight with one another, trying to poach each othersâ customers and workers. They are at each othersâ throats.
Itâs hard enough for a couple hundred executives to agree on anything. But when theyâre legitimately competing with one another, really obsessing about how to eat each othersâ lunches, they canât agree on anything.
The instant one of them goes to their regulator with some bullshit story, about how itâs impossible to have a decent search engine without fine-grained commercial surveillance; or how itâs impossible to have a secure and easy to use mobile device without a total veto over which software can run on it; or how itâs impossible to administer an ISPâs network unless you can slow down connections to servers whose owners arenât paying bribes for âpremium carriage"; thereâs some *other company saying, âThatâs bullshitâ
âWeâve managed it! Hereâs our server logs, our quarterly financials and our customer testimonials to prove it.â
100 companies are a rabble, they're a mob. They canât agree on a lobbying position. Theyâre too busy eating each othersâ lunch to agree on how to cater a meeting to discuss it.
But let those hundred companies merge to monopoly, absorb one another in an incestuous orgy, turn into five giant companies, so inbred theyâve got a corporate Habsburg jaw, and they become a cartel.
Itâs easy for a cartel to agree on what bullshit theyâre all going to feed their regulator, and to mobilize some of the excess billions theyâve reaped through consolidation, which freed them from âwasteful competition," sp they can capture their regulators completely.
You know, Congress used to pass federal consumer privacy laws? Not anymore.
The last time Congress managed to pass a federal consumer privacy law was in 1988: The Video Privacy Protection Act. Thatâs a law that bans video-store clerks from telling newspapers what VHS cassettes you take home. In other words, it regulates three things that have effectively ceased to exist.
The threat of having your video rental history out there in the public eye was not the last or most urgent threat the American public faced, and yet, Congress is deadlocked on passing a privacy law.
Tech companiesâ regulatory capture involves a risible and transparent gambit, that is so stupid, itâs an insult to all the good hardworking risible transparent ruses out there.
Namely, they claim that when they violate your consumer, privacy or labor rights, Itâs not a crime, because they do it with an app.
Algorithmic wage discrimination isnât illegal wage theft: we do it with an app.
Spying on you from asshole to appetite isnât a privacy violation: we do it with an app.
And Amazonâs scam search tool that tricks you into paying 29% more than the best match for your query? Not a ripoff. We do it with an app.
Once we killed competition â stopped putting down rat poison â we got cartels â the rats ate our faces. And the cartels captured their regulators â the rats bought out the poison factory and shut it down.
So companies arenât constrained by competition or regulation.
But you know what? This is tech, and tech is different.IItâs different because itâs flexible. Because our computers are Turing-complete universal von Neumann machines. That means that any enshittificatory alteration to a program can be disenshittified with another program.
Every time HP jacks up the price of ink , they invite a competitor to market a refill kit or a compatible cartridge.
When Tesla installs code that says you have to pay an extra monthly fee to use your whole battery, they invite a modder to start selling a kit to jailbreak that battery and charge it all the way up.
Lemme take you through a little example of how that works: Imagine this is a product design meeting for our companyâs website, and the guy leading the meeting says âDudes, you know how our KPI is topline ad-revenue? Well, Iâve calculated that if we make the ads just 20% more invasive and obnoxious, weâll boost ad rev by 2%â
This is a good pitch. Hit that KPI and everyone gets a fat bonus. We can all take our families on a luxury ski vacation in Switzerland.
But hereâs the thing: someoneâs gonna stick their arm up â someone who doesnât give a shit about user well-being, and that person is gonna say, âI love how you think, Elon. But has it occurred to you that if we make the ads 20% more obnoxious, then 40% of our users will go to a search engine and type 'How do I block ads?'"
I mean, what a nightmare! Because once a user does that, the revenue from that user doesnât rise to 102%. It doesnât stay at 100% It falls to zero, forever.
[Any guesses why?]
Because no user ever went back to the search engine and typed, 'How do I start seeing ads again?'
Once the user jailbreaks their phone or discovers third party ink, or develops a relationship with an independent Tesla mechanic whoâll unlock all the DLC in their car, that user is gone, forever.
Interoperability â that latent property bequeathed to us courtesy of Herrs Turing and Von Neumann and their infinitely flexible, universal machines â that is a serious check on enshittification.
The fact that Congress hasnât passed a privacy law since 1988 Is countered, at least in part, by the fact that the majority of web users are now running ad-blockers, which are also tracker-blockers.
But no oneâs ever installed a tracker-blocker for an app. Because reverse engineering an app puts in you jeopardy of criminal and civil prosecution under Section 1201 of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act, with penalties of a 5-year prison sentence and a $500k fine for a first offense.
And violating its terms of service puts you in jeopardy under the Computer Fraud and Abuse Act of 1986, which is the law that Ronald Reagan signed in a panic after watching Wargames (seriously!).
Helping other users violate the terms of service can get you hit with a lawsuit for tortious interference with contract. And then thereâs trademark, copyright and patent.
All that nonsense we call âIP,â but which Jay Freeman of Cydia calls âFelony Contempt of Business Model."
So if weâre still at that product planning meeting and now itâs time to talk about our app, the guy leading the meeting says, âOK, so weâll make the ads in the app 20% more obnoxious to pull a 2% increase in topline ad rev?â
And that person who objected to making the website 20% worse? Their hand goes back up. Only this time they say âWhy donât we make the ads 100% more invasive and get a 10% increase in ad rev?"
Because it doesn't matter if a user goes to a search engine and types, âHow do I block ads in an app." The answer is: you can't. So YOLO, enshittify away.
âIPâ is just a euphemism for âany law that lets me reach outside my companyâs walls to exert coercive control over my critics, competitors and customers,â and âappâ is just a euphemism for âA web page skinned with the right IP so that protecting your privacy while you use it is a felony.â
Interop used to keep companies from enshittifying. If a company made its client suck, someone would roll out an alternative client, if they ripped a feature out and wanted to sell it back to you as a monthly subscription, someone would make a compatible plugin that restored it for a one-time fee, or for free.
To help people flee Myspace, FB gave them bots that youâd load with your login credentials. It would scrape your waiting Myspace messages and put âem in your FB inbox, and login to Myspace and paste your replies into your Myspace outbox. So you didnât have to choose between the people you loved on Myspace, and Facebook, which launched with a promise never to spy on you. Remember that?!
Thanks to the metastasis of IP, all that is off the table today. Apple owes its very existence to iWork Suite, whose Pages, Numbers and Keynote are file-compatible with Microsoftâs Word, Excel and Powerpoint. But make an IOS runtime thatâll play back the files you bought from Appleâs stores on other platforms, and theyâll nuke you til you glow.
FB wouldnât have had a hope of breaking Myspaceâs grip on social media without that scrape, but scrape FB today in support of an alternative client and their lawyers will bomb you til the rubble bounces.
Google scraped every website in the world to create its search index. Try and scrape Google and theyâll have your head on a pike.
When they did it, it was progress. When you do it to them, thatâs piracy. Every pirate wants to be an admiral.
Because this handful of companies has so thoroughly captured their regulators, they can wield the power of the state against you when you try to break their grip on power, even as their own flagrant violations of our rights go unpunished. Because they do them with an app.
Tech lost its fear of competitin it neutralized the threat from regulators, and then put them in harness to attack new startups that might do unto them as they did unto the companies that came before them.
But even so, there was a force that kept our bosses in check That force was us. Tech workers.
Tech workers have historically been in short supply, which gave us power, and our bosses knew it.
To get us to work crazy hours, they came up with a trick. They appealed to our love of technology, and told us that we were heroes of a digital revolution, who would âorganize the worldâs information and make it useful,â who would âbring the world closer together.â
They brought in expert set-dressers to turn our workplaces into whimsical campuses with free laundry, gourmet cafeterias, massages, and kombucha, and a surgeon on hand to freeze our eggs so that we could work through our fertile years.
They convinced us that we were being pampered, rather than being worked like government mules.
This trick has a name. Fobazi Ettarh, the librarian-theorist, calls it âvocational awe, and Elon Musk calls it being âextremely hardcore.â
This worked very well. Boy did we put in some long-ass hours!
But for our bosses, this trick failed badly. Because if you miss your motherâs funeral and to hit a deadline, and then your boss orders you to enshittify that product, you are gonna experience a profound moral injury, which you are absolutely gonna make your boss share.
Because what are they gonna do? Fire you? They canât hire someone else to do your job, and you can get a job thatâs even better at the shop across the street.
So workers held the line when competition, regulation and interop failed.
But eventually, supply caught up with demand. Tech laid off 260,000 of us last year, and another 100,000 in the first half of this year.
You canât tell your bosses to go fuck themselves, because theyâll fire your ass and give your job to someone whoâll be only too happy to enshittify that product you built.
Thatâs why this is all happening right now. Our bosses arenât different. They didnât catch a mind-virus that turned them into greedy assholes who donât care about our usersâ wellbeing or the quality of our products.
As far as our bosses have always been concerned, the point of the business was to charge the most, and deliver the least, while sharing as little as possible with suppliers, workers, users and customers. Theyâre not running charities.
Since day one, our bosses have shown up for work and yanked as hard as they can on the big ENSHITTIFICATION lever behind their desks, only that lever didnât move much. It was all gummed up by competition, regulation, interop and workers.
As those sources of friction melted away, the enshittification lever started moving very freely.
Which sucks, I know. But think about this for a sec: our bosses, despite being wildly imperfect vessels capable of rationalizing endless greed and cheating, nevertheless oversaw a series of actually great products and services.
Not because they used to be better people, but because they used to be subjected to discipline.
So it follows that if we want to end the enshittocene, dismantle the enshitternet, and build a new, good internet that our bosses canât wreck, we need to make sure that these constraints are durably installed on that internet, wound around its very roots and nerves. And we have to stand guard over it so that it canât be dismantled again.
A new, good internet is one that has the positive aspects of the old, good internet: an ethic of technological self-determination, where users of technology (and hackers, tinkerers, startups and others serving as their proxies) can reconfigure and mod the technology they use, so that it does what they need it to do, and so that it canât be used against them.
But the new, good internet will fix the defects of the old, good internet, the part that made it hard to use for anyone who wasnât us. And hell yeah we can do that. Tech bosses swear that itâs impossible, that you canât have a conversation friend without sharing it with Zuck; or search the web without letting Google scrape you down to the viscera; or have a phone that works reliably without giving Apple a veto over the software you install.
They claim that itâs a nonsense to even ponder this kind of thing. Itâs like making water thatâs not wet. But thatâs bullshit. We can have nice things. We can build for the people we love, and give them a place thatâs worth of their time and attention.
To do that, we have to install constraints.
The first constraint, remember, is competition. Weâre living through a epochal shift in competition policy. After 40 years with antitrust enforcement in an induced coma, a wave of antitrust vigor has swept through governments all over the world. Regulators are stepping in to ban monopolistic practices, open up walled gardens, block anticompetitive mergers, and even unwind corrupt mergers that were undertaken on false pretenses.
Normally this is the place in the speech where Iâd list out all the amazing things that have happened over the past four years. The enforcement actions that blocked companies from becoming too big to care, and that scared companies away from even trying.
Like Wiz, which just noped out of the largest acquisition offer in history, turning down Googleâs $23b cashout, and deciding to, you know, just be a fucking business that makes money by producing a product that people want and selling it at a competitive price.
Normally, Iâd be listing out FTC rulemakings that banned noncompetes nationwid. Or the new merger guidelines the FTC and DOJ cooked up, which â among other things â establish that the agencies should be considering whether a merger will negatively impact privacy.
I had a whole section of this stuff in my notes, a real victory lap, but I deleted it all this week.
[Can anyone guess why?]
Thatâs right! This week, Judge Amit Mehta, ruling for the DC Circuit of these United States of America, In the docket 20-3010 a case known as United States v. Google LLC, found that âGoogle is a monopolist, and it has acted as one to maintain its monopoly," and ordered Google and the DOJ to propose a schedule for a remedy, like breaking the company up.
So yeah, that was pretty fucking epic.
Now, this antitrust stuff is pretty esoteric, and I wonât gatekeep you or shame you if you wanna keep a little distance on this subject. Nearly everyone is an antitrust normie, and that's OK. But if youâre a normie, youâre probably only catching little bits and pieces of the narrative, and let me tell you, the monopolists know it and they are flooding the zone.
The Wall Street Journal has published over 100 editorials condemning FTC Chair Lina Khan, saying sheâs an ineffectual do-nothing, wasting public funds chasing doomed, quixotic adventures against poor, innocent businesses accomplishing nothing
[Does anyone out there know who owns the Wall Street Journal?]
Thatâs right, itâs Rupert Murdoch. Do you really think Rupert Murdoch pays his editorial board to write one hundred editorials about someone whoâs not getting anything done?
The reality is that in the USA, in the UK, in the EU, in Australia, in Canada, in Japan, in South Korea, even in China, we are seeing more antitrust action over the past four years than over the preceding forty years.
Remember, competition law is actually pretty robust. The problem isnât the law, Itâs the enforcement priorities. Reagan put antitrust in mothballs 40 years ago, but that elegant weapon from a more civilized age is now back in the hands of people who know how to use it, and theyâre swinging for the fences.
Next up: regulation.
As the seemingly inescapable power of the tech giants is revealed for the sham it always was, governments and regulators are finally gonna kill the âone weird trickâ of violating the law, and saying âIt doesnât count, we did it with an app.â
Like in the EU, theyâre rolling out the Digital Markets Act this year. Thatâs a law requiring dominant platforms to stand up APIs so that third parties can offer interoperable services.
So a co-op, a nonprofit, a hobbyist, a startup, or a local government agency wil eventuallyl be able to offer, say, a social media server that can interconnect with one of the dominant social media silos, and users who switch to that new platform will be able to continue to exchange messages with the users they follow and groups they belong to, so the switching costs will fall to damned near zero.
Thatâs a very cool rule, but whatâs even cooler is how itâs gonna be enforced. Previous EU tech rules were âregulationsâ as in the GDPR â the General Data Privacy Regulation. EU regs need to be âtransposedâ into laws in each of the 27 EU member states, so they become national laws that get enforced by national courts.
For Big Tech, that means all previous tech regulations are enforced in Ireland, because Ireland is a tax haven, and all the tech companies fly Irish flags of convenience.
Hereâs the thing: every tax haven is also a crime haven. After all, if Google can pretend itâs Irish this week, it can pretend to be Cypriot, or Maltese, or Luxembougeious next week. So Ireland has to keep these footloose criminal enterprises happy, or theyâll up sticks and go somewhere else.
This is why the GDPR is such a goddamned joke in practice. Big tech wipes its ass with the GDPR, and the only way to punish them starts with Irelandâs privacy commissioner, who barely bothers to get out of bed. This is an agency that spends most of its time watching cartoons on TV in its pajamas and eating breakfast cereal. So all of the big GDPR cases go to Ireland and they die there.
This is hardly a secret. The European Commission knows itâs going on. So with the DMA, the Commission has changed things up: The DMA is an âAct,â not a âRegulation.â Meaning it gets enforced in the EUâs federal courts, bypassing the national courts in crime-havens like Ireland.
In other words, the âwe violate privacy law, but we do it with an appâ gambit that worked on Irelandâs toothless privacy watchdog is now a dead letter, because EU federal judges have no reason to swallow that obvious bullshit.
Here in the US, the dam is breaking on federal consumer privacy law â at last!
Remember, our last privacy law was passed in 1988 to protect the sanctity of VHS rental history. It's been a minute.
And the thing is, there's a lot of people who are angry about stuff that has some nexus with America's piss-poor privacy landscape. Worried that Facebook turned grampy into a Qanon? That Insta made your teen anorexic? That TikTok is brainwashing millennials into quoting Osama Bin Laden? Or that cops are rolling up the identities of everyone at a Black Lives Matter protest or the Jan 6 riots by getting location data from Google? Or that Red State Attorneys General are tracking teen girls to out-of-state abortion clinics? Or that Black people are being discriminated against by online lending or hiring platforms? Or that someone is making AI deepfake porn of you?
A federal privacy law with a private right of action â which means that individuals can sue companies that violate their privacy â would go a long way to rectifying all of these problems
There's a pretty big coalition for that kind of privacy law! Which is why we have seen a procession of imperfect (but steadily improving) privacy laws working their way through Congress.
If you sign up for EFFâs mailing list at eff.org weâll send you an email when these come up, so you can call your Congressjerk or Senator and talk to them about it. Or better yet, make an appointment to drop by their offices when theyâre in their districts, and explain to them that youâre not just a registered voter from their district, youâre the kind of elite tech person who goes to Defcon, and then explain the bill to them. That stuff makes a difference.
What about self-help? How are we doing on making interoperability legal again, so hackers can just fix shit without waiting for Congress or a federal agency to act?
All the action here these day is in the state Right to Repair fight. Weâre getting state R2R bills, like the one that passed this year in Oregon that bans parts pairing, where DRM is used to keep a device from using a new part until it gets an authorized technicianâs unlock code.
These bills are pushed by a fantastic group of organizations called the Repair Coalition, at Repair.org, and theyâll email you when one of these laws is going through your statehouse, so you can meet with your state reps and explain to the JV squad the same thing you told your federal reps.
Repair.orgâs prime mover is Ifixit, who are genuine heroes of the repair revolution, and Ifixitâs founder, Kyle Wiens, is here at the con. When you see him, you can shake his hand and tell him thanks, and thatâll be even better if you tell him that youâve signed up to get alerts at repair.org!
Now, on to the final way that we reverse enhittification and build that new, good internet: you, the tech labor force.
For years, your bosses tricked you into thinking you were founders in waiting, temporarily embarrassed entrepreneurs who were only momentarily drawing a salary.
You certainly werenât workers. Your power came from your intrinsic virtue, not like those lazy slobs in unions who have to get their power through that kumbaya solidarity nonsense.
It was a trick. You were scammed. The power you had came from scarcity, and so when the scarcity ended, when the industry started ringing up six-figure annual layoffs, your power went away with it.
The only durable source of power for tech workers is as workers, in a union.
Think about Amazon. Warehouse workers have to piss in bottles and have the highest rate of on-the-job maimings of any competing business. Whereas Amazon coders get to show up for work with facial piercings, green mohawks, and black t-shirts that say things their bosses donât understand. They can piss whenever they want!
Thatâs not because Jeff Bezos or Andy Jassy loves you guys. Itâs because theyâre scared youâll quit and they donât know how to replace you.
Time for the second obligatory William Gibson quote: âThe future is here, itâs just not evenly distributed.â You know whoâs living in the future?. Those Amazon blue-collar workers. They are the bleeding edge.
Drivers whose eyeballs are monitored by AI cameras that do digital phrenology on their faces to figure out whether to dock their pay, warehouse workers whose bodies are ruined in just months.
As tech bosses beef up that reserve army of unemployed, skilled tech workers, then those tech workers â you all â will arrive at the same future as them.
Look, I know that youâve spent your careers explaining in words so small your boss could understand them that you refuse to enshittify the companyâs products, and I thank you for your service.
But if you want to go on fighting for the user, you need power thatâs more durable than scarcity. You need a union. Wanna learn how? Check out the Tech Workers Coalition and Tech Solidarity, and get organized.
Enshittification didnât arise because our bosses changed. They were always that guy.
They were always yankinâ on that enshittification lever in the C-suite.
What changed was the environment, everything that kept that switch from moving.
And thatâs good news, in a bankshot way, because it means we can make good services out of imperfect people. As a wildly imperfect person myself, I find this heartening.
The new good internet is in our grasp: an internet that has the technological self-determination of the old, good internet, and the greased-skids simplicity of Web 2.0 that let all our normie friends get in on the fun.
Tech bosses want you to think that good UX and enshittification canât ever be separated. Thatâs such a self-serving proposition you can spot it from orbit. We know it, 'cause we built the old good internet, and weâve been fighting a rear-guard action to preserve it for the past two decades.
Itâs time to stop playing defense. It's time to go on the offensive. To restore competition, regulation, interop and tech worker power so that we can create the new, good internet weâll need to fight fascism, the climate emergency, and genocide.
To build a digital nervous system for a 21st century in which our children can thrive and prosper.

Community voting for SXSW is live! If you wanna hear RIDA QADRI and me talk about how GIG WORKERS can DISENSHITTIFY their jobs with INTEROPERABILITY, VOTE FOR THIS ONE!
If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/08/17/hack-the-planet/#how-about-a-nice-game-of-chess
Image: https://twitter.com/igama/status/1822347578094043435/ (cropped)
@[email protected] (cropped)
https://mamot.fr/@[email protected]/112963252835869648
CC BY 4.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/deed.pt
#pluralistic#defcon#defcon 32#hackers#enshittification#speeches#transcripts#disenshittify or die#Youtube
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Your take of CĂrdan being an old man who enjoys pestering people is my absolute fave bc yeah if I was the oldest elf alive I'd be a little shit half the time too for funzies

( credits to the lovely @peregrintook for this beautiful gifset ! )
â” â WATER-DAMAGED!
summ. Elrond arrives at CĂrdanâs workshop. He finds his heart instead. or: The Herald and the Artisan fall in love. pairing. elrond peredhel / f!reader w.count. 1.2k (a lil baby!) a/n. set in s2e1, friends-to-lovers kinda , fluff galore , mutual pining , CĂrdan being a thirdwheel (but highkey enjoying it because heâs a little shit like that)
       YOUâRE QUICK TO attempt to bundle Elrond up like a child when heâd arrived.Â
Frantic, almost, at the sight of Lindonâs renowned Heraldâ drenched to the bone, head-to-toe, and dripping river water from his mess of curls, leaving puddles and a wet track wherever he went on the stone of the workshop.
âHeâs not here yet,â is what youâd said, when heâd urged you for Master CĂrdan. The shipwright had gone off to appraise proper timber for the frames of the vessels prepared for Valinor, now that High King Gil-Galad has decreed preparations to set sail.Â
âBut he should return by nightfall, latest. So will you please sit down, Elrââ
âI cannot,â he overrides, wholly unconvincing through the chatter of his teeth. âYouâll be at risk if I stay.â
You blink. ââŠFrom who?â
âIââ
In the distance, a horse whinnies.Â
Elrond tenses instantly.
ââŠAre youâ hiding?â you realise, as he springs to his feet to make headway for the sidedoors. âElrond, wait!â
âThank you, truly, for your kindness, but I cannot allow the Kingâs Guardââ
âThat was just Silef,â you say incredulously, muscling the door back shut and stubbornly standing in his way. âMy mare, remember? From the stables just uphill?âÂ
A pause.Â
He listens with pricked ears: gates of a stable door squeaking; hooves clopping from paddock ground onto pasture grass; the sound of grain and feed being chewed on, after a moment's pass. A notable absence of marching Elven armour and feet stamping its way downhill towards him.Â
Just Silef. Youâre right. Heâd been paranoid.Â
âĂ quildessĂ«, Elrond,â comes your quiet voice, gentler now as you chase to meet his anxious gaze. âI will make sure no one comes into this workshop, unless itâs Master CĂrdan himself,â you assure, resting your hands on his forearms. âJust please, sit down. Youâre shaking.âÂ
âŠHe is. He hadnât even realised.Â
It might have been adrenaline, or the bite of the cold from wind and waterâ but heâs trembling, nonetheless, like a leaf.Â
âIâm sorry,â he says, much, much later, when youâd stoked the coals of the workshop hearth to life, and set him upon a wooden seat beside it.
From the open foyer of the atelier, the sea-reflected hues of the setting sun does little to hide the tentative worry in your features. Your voice is as gentle as the lap of tidewater. âThereâs nothing to apologise for.â
âI shouldnât have⊠barged in.âÂ
I shouldnât have involved you in the first place, and put you at risk for treason for harboring a dissenter.
The firelight paints your face in soft, flickering licks of ochre as you tenderly dry off the dampness in his hair, the water trickling down his face. âYou were afraid,â you reason generously.
(You donât tell him that he looks adorably⊠pitiful. With eyes like that of a kicked puppy, almost. Even worse that he looks half-drowned.)
Elrond doesnât argue. Youâve always been a kind friend to him. So, so kind. Ever-ready and steadfast to extend an olive branch, impervious to tactlessness, or even offence, from the sheer tenacity of your patience. Elrond has always admired you for it. Elrond has alwaysâ
Liked you. Cared. Loved.
(Too much to allow himself to let you get caught in this tangle heâs been forced into.)
He lays a hand over yours, and you pause mid-wipe of a droplet down his lined jaw. His eyes are shut briefly, as if falling into the comfort of your touchâ candid indulgence. It makes your heart stutter.
That youâre allowed a quiet moment to admire him this close, so much so you can see the rings of sundering blue in his eyes; or to touch him this affectionately, so much so you could feel the very change of temperature on his skinâÂ
You think youâve been blessed with a handsome vision by the Valar themselves.
âYou must be curious,â he says, voice a low murmur. His palm swallows yours entirely. His fingers are warm by now. (You shouldnât notice such detailsâ but you do. Youâre an artisan, after all. Or perhaps hopeless romantic is a better suited term?) âBut this is beyond even me.â
He slides your hand down, much to your dismay, and uncurls the pouch heâs been clutching onto since he arrived. Now that itâs infront of you, thereâs a pull to it you canât quite understand.
You reach, almost too keenlyâÂ
âbut you close his fingers around it instead.
If Elrond had shown any surprise, you didnât notice.Â
âMust be why youâve sought out Master CĂrdan,â you muse, looking up at him. âIf itâs beyond you, itâs most certainly beyond me, a mere shipwrightâs apprentice.â
âItâs not that I donât trust you,â Elrond adds quickly, realising how he must have come across.Â
âI know,â you laugh, before he can take off into a tangent. (Itâs bright and musical to Elrondâs earsâ thinks if he could drown in its sound, he would have done so willingly.) âYou forget I know you.â
Not entirely, he doesnât say. You donât know how much my heart sings to be near you. How much your presenceâ or the very thought of you, evenâ have always brought comfort to me.Â
You donât know how much Iâve been resisting the urge to kiss you since you first sat me down by the fire.
He feels a little smile coming, the kind he couldnât help, that would light his whole face whenever he cast his gaze on you. âYou do, donât you?â he whispers, voice sinking into something almostâ nostalgic, at the sudden unravelling of old memories shared with you throughout the age.
âWell, when it comes to Kingdom politiciansâŠâ you shrug teasingly. âAs much as Iâm allowed to be privy to.â
He barely laughs, too busy looking at you with rapt, reverent attention. It curls a timidness in your heart. âYou are allowed all of me. Always.â
Something takes wing in your chest. Butterflies, maybe. Doves taking flight in your ribcage.Â
As are you, to me.
At least, that's what you wouldâve said, had your ears not caught the distant clop of hooves headed downwind towards the river edge. âMaster CĂrdan is here,â you say instead, diverted. You recognise the huff of his steed anywhere.
You watch Elrond perk up and tune into the approach: the rustle of saddle and stirrups, the shuffle of robes and footsteps. When the doors squeak open and shut, the Kingdomâs shipwright finds the Kingdomâs herald standing in the heart of his own workshop.
âElrond,â he says, by way of greeting. Thereâs naught a hint of surprise in his voiceâ CĂrdan had felt a call louder than the sea long before heâd arrived, and now he can understand itâs carried in the heraldâs charge. âHave you come to seek a certain apprentice of mine?â he asks, regardless.
Itâs playful. Knowing.
âHe seeks you, Master CĂrdan,â you answer politely, rounding from the corner where youâd grabbed your spare pelerine cloak to pass to Elrond. âHere, to keep warm.â
âThank you.â
You bow your head to them both. âI shall be at the lighthouse just across.â
Your fingertips brush against Elrondâs hand as you leave. It tarries; merely a millisecondâ enough, however, for CĂrdanâs keen eyes to catchâ before he watches you depart through the sidedoors to give them the privacy they needed.Â
Elrond's hand flexes reflexively. Longingly.
A beat passes.
ââŠAre you sure it is still me you seek?â CĂrdan muses, brows shot to his hairline.
The tips of Elrondâs ears burn.Â
#a lil bite of a fic!#CĂrdan liveslugging the entire darcy-coded-hand-reflex is sending me#probably has been trying to set the two up for AGES too#fluff galore HHHHH#why does mutual pining work SO well with Elrond#elrond#elrond peredhel#trop#the rings of power#rings of power#elrond imagine#elrond x you#elrond x reader#elrond x y/n#elrond peredhel x you#elrond peredhel x reader#elrond peredhel x y/n#trop imagine#lotr imagine#lotr#lord of the rings#the lord of the rings#water-damaged!
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Hello hello!! Just found your blog and Iâm absolutely in love with your writing. So if itâs ok I come with a bar order.. whiskey with lime in a tall glass please and thank you
thanks for the kind words :)
lando norris x bsf! reader
You are mine, end of discussion
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"Dude I am so fucking excited for today," you said to Lando as you guys walked into the paddock. He gave you a weird look.
"I mean I'm literally starting P15 but I really appreciate your faith in me," he replied scratching his head.
"I don't care about the race," you quickly said before correcting yourself. "I mean of course I care and you'll be amazing superstar but did you hear who is in the Alpine garage today?"
He shook his head at you frowning. You were busting at the seams with excitement.
"Joe Burrow!!!" You squealed. "Pierre said he would introduce me and I might die."
Even though you had moved from the States a couple of years ago you still avidly followed American Football. Now the Bengals weren't your team necessarily but Joe Burrow...that man had aura.
"Were you that excited to meet me the first time," Lando asked pouting.
"I didn't even know who you were," you replied laughing and Lando's frown deepened.
When you met Lando you had just moved to Monaco and had spent a lot of days working out of a coffee shop next to your building. On a busier day, he had asked if he could sit with you for a second as there weren't any seats open. You'd hit it off when he noticed that you were working but also had your phone set up to watch the Masters. He invited you to go golfing with his friend Max and a couple of others and you just fit in so effortlessly to the group. You definitely had a crush on him in the beginning but nothing had ever happened so you brushed it off.
"I have to go get ready now, but I'll see you after the race," he said shortly and walked off. Confused you watched him go, you'd definitely pissed him off but you weren't sure how.
Spotting Pierre, you rushed over to him as he was heading to the garage.
"Can't believe Lando is letting you loose to meet Joe Burrow," he said as you fell into step next to him.
"I didn't realize I had to get his permission to go anywhere," you said sweetly and he threw his hands up in mock defeat.
"I just know that if Kika was this excited to meet another man, I'd have a problem."
"You do realize that Lando is not my boyfriend."
"Mmhmm," he replied giving you a wink.
The two of you walked into the garage and you were growing more nervous, especially when you caught sight of Joe talking to Esteban. He waved at Pierre, shaking his hand and then his eyes fell to you, curious.
"This is y/n, she's a good friend of ours," Pierre introduced and Joe took your hand shaking it.
"She's also Lando's personal attack dog," Esteban joked and you laughed along with Joe.
"Nice to meet you, y/n," he said smiling. "It's good to find an American here holding down the fort."
"Yeah I couldn't weasel my way into the NFL so had to settle for second best," you joked and he laughed while Pierre and Esteban protested.
"You know it is taking a lot to be civil with you right now because you broke my heart in 2019," you said seriously and he smirked.
"Let me guess, Clemson or Oklahoma?"
"Oklahoma," you admitted looking away.
"I would say I'm sorry but I'm definitely not," he said teasing. "Even if it made a pretty girl like you turn against me."
You flushed and saw Pierre shoot Esteban a look who just laughed turning away.
"Are you watching in here?" Joe asked. "I'd love some good company."
"No, I'll be in McLaren," you told him. "Lando will throw a fit if I'm not there."
"Well I'd actually love to meet him, so I'll swing by later yeah?" You nodded bidding them all goodbye and heading back to the garage.
"Is she dating him or what?" You heard Joe ask and you slowed to hear Pierre respond.
"It's complicated."
His answer confused you but you brushed it off.
The race was amazing. You were so proud watching Lando fight his way to P4 and seeing Oscar take home the win. Finding him after the win, he swept you up into a big hug.
"I'm so proud of you buddy," you said grinning. "But you stink."
He laughed promising to take a shower before you guys left.
"Hey man, great race," you heard Joe say slapping Lando's hand.
"Thanks," he said politely. He had his arm around your shoulder and you moved to get out but his grip tightened, holding you there.
"Would love to see you at a Bengals game sometime, both of you," he said and you nodded brightly.
"I think we're good," Lando replied shortly and you elbowed him hard in his side giving him a look.
"Stop being so rude," you said annoyed but Joe just laughed.
"No worries, I'd act the same way if I were him," he said cockily.
"What's that supposed to mean?" You asked confused and he winked at you.
"He knows."
You could feel Lando steaming as you followed him into his driver's room, ready to lay into him.
"What on earth is wrong with you?" You questioned. "That was so fucking embarrassing."
"Oh I'm so sorry for ruining your chances with Joe Burrow," he said whirling on you. "I'm sure you it'll still work out though and you can start going to all his games, wear his merch, and wait for him outside the locker room."
"You are literally insane," you seethed and he laughed humorlessly stepping closer to you.
"Your place is not next to him," he said, voice rising. "It's right here in this room, next to me at every race and every day for that matter. You are mine, end of discussion."
You stood there gaping as he walked into the bathroom slamming the door. What the actual fuck? You were pissed. This whole time you had thought he hadn't felt the same way because he never said anything and it took Joe fucking Burrow to figure it out.
Ripping the door open you stormed into the bathroom, not caring about Lando being undressed in the shower. You yanked the shower door open stepping in, letting the water hit you as Lando stared at you with wide eyes. He started to say something but you cut him off, slamming your lips into his, pressing him against the wall.
He took over the kiss, moving aggressively while pulling you closer to him. You pulled back for air and he smiled softly at you.
"I love you," he said and your heart swelled.
"I love you too," you replied. "But I still want to go to a Bengals game."
He rolled his eyes, bringing you in for another kiss.
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Hello!!! This is my first time sending an ask, but have you thought of doing servant!Reader x Shamrock? (He is literally all over my head )
Oooo Yus! I had a lot of fun with this one! Thank you for the amazing ask! I hope I did it justice! â€ïžâ€ïž p.s. I characterized Sham a bit differently here than in my other works, but I hope you enjoyed!
Unwind
Pairings! Figarland Shamrock x Female Reader
Warnings! Cunnilingus, hand jobs, illusions to cock warming
Shamrock Masterlist-> HERE
You were nothing but a lowly servant to the household, but to Shamrock, you were everything. You were the one to tend to his rooms, to his laundry, even his daily meals, all of it done by you and you alone. He wouldn't have any other. Today, he had caught you in his study, duster in hand as you cleaned away the nonexistent buildup along his bookshelves. You froze when he opened the door, back tensing as you kept your face angled to the floor in respect to your master.
Shamrock was frustrated, brow furrowed in a nasty scowl as he sat in his chair, spinning around so that he could watch you carefully begin your duties again. Slowly, the tension in his body began to deflate, your presence alone a balm to his raging emotions. His father had berated him today, telling him that he wasn't doing enough to advance their plans. He had given his entire life to his father, but still, that just wasn't enough for Saint Figarland.
He needed to unwind, to get the rest of the tension out of his body before he had to confront his father again, and you were the perfect outlet. Shamrock pushes up from his chair, silently treading across the room until he stands behind you. He reaches out, one gloved hand curling around your hip, and he feels you freeze under his hand, back tense and head dropping to expose the back of your neck.
âDon't be afraid, darling. I could never hurt you,â Shamrock murmurs. He wished for you to believe him, for while he was a harsh man, he wanted to be kind to you. For the woman who made his life just a tiny bit easier, even if it was your duty.
âHow- how can I help you, Sir?â Your voice trembles. You knew that Shamrock preferred you to the other servant girls, but you weren't sure what made you special in his eyes. All you did was keep your head down and try your best to be good under their care.
Shamrock pulls you by the hip, spinning you around so that you can face him. His face was stoic like usual, but you could still see his frustration in the way his brow stayed furrowed. You want to reach out and smooth it away with your thumb, but you doubt your touch would be well received even if the holy knight liked you.
âYou do so much for me, don't you, girl? Going out of your way for me. I've seen it. I've been watching you for a long time,â He murmurs and one hand comes up to rest along your jaw, a gloved thumb sweeping back and forth, âSo I'd like for you to do something else for me. Think you can do that, darling?â
He feels you shiver at his touch, a pink tongue darting out to wet your lips before you daringly raise your head and meet his eyes. You look nervous, but there is a gleam of interest he can see shining dully, âI would like nothing more than to help you with anything you may need, Sir.â
Shamrock hums before he drops his hands from your body and steps away, walking back to his desk and sitting in his chair. He has a delightful idea, and the more he thinks about it, the more his cock hardens in his pants, straining at the seams to be let out. You turn and watch him, and Shamrock makes a show of shifting in his seat, hand smoothing down to trail his fingers over the obvious bulge tenting his slacks. You watch him, face turning hot, and you have an inkling of that he wants from you.
âCome here, darling. I think you deserve a reward for how well you take care of me, don't you think so?â He murmurs and drops his other hand, fingers making easy works of his belt, and then his zipper. A soft sigh leaves him when he works his cock out of his underwear, hand wrapping around the base and stroking upwards, thumb circling the head twice before he drops back down.
You walk forward automatically, eyes wide and mouth salivating at the sight before you. Figarland Shamrock is a beautiful being, and you feel honored to be one of the few to witness this side of him. You come and stand between his legs, desperately wanting to reach out and touch for yourself, but feeling too nervous to do so.
As if he can hear your thoughts, Shamrock snags your hand and pulls you forward, guiding your own hand down and wrapping your hand around his length, keeping your hand trapped with his own. He leads you in the way that he likes, a tight grip but a slow pace. Your hand is infinitely softer than his own, fingers uncalloused, and you are a quick learner, easily picking up what he enjoys. The redhead lets go of your hand, allowing you to take over.
You watch in fascination as precum bubbles up at the tip and stroke your hand up, thumb smoothing over his slit and gathering the sticky liquid. Shamrock watches you lift your hand and wrap your lips around your finger, tongue curling around and sucking it off with a hum. Arousal shoots down his spine at the sight, and Shamrock meets your wide eyes. However, as much as he would love for you to suck his cock, he still has something else in mind for you.
âGet on my desk,â He orders, voice and low husk, and you scramble to comply, carefully moving away any important looking documents before you hop up on his desk, legs clenched tight in anticipation. Shamrock rolls his chair forward, settling between your legs and shoving your skirts out of the way. He hooks his finger in your waistband and, with a little force, snaps the thin fabric with ease. Your panties get stuffed into a drawer on his desk, and then he focuses back on his prize.
Your cunt is a work of art. Pretty and pink, and already he can see your folds glistening with your arousal. With a burning need, Shamrock leans in and buries his face between your legs, hands gripping your hips when you gasp and bow off the desk, eyes going wide and hands landing in his long hair. Your fingers tangled and pulled, but Shamrock didn't mind.
He licks a stripe up your cunt, tongue wiggling through your folds and lips smacking and sucking. Sweet cream pools along his tongue, and he groans at the delightful taste, pushing forward and lifting your hips so that he could angle himself to plunge his tongue into you, seeking that unique taste that only came from you.
Shamrock works you until you quiver under him, fingers tightening in his hair as you come against his face, eyes squeezed shut as you breathe his name with a low whine. He doesn't stop until he is satisfied, pulling away to stare up at your flushed face, your eyes wide in wonder when you meet his own.
You watch him sit back in his seat, hand wrapping around his cock and stroking it twice before holding still. His head cocks to the side, and he beckons you closer with a crook of a gloved finger. You slide off the desk, legs feeling like jelly, and step closer. His free hand turns you so that you are facing away from him, and then you are being lifted like you weigh nothing. Shamrock sits you down on his lap, groaning when your cunt slides along his cock. It takes some adjusting, but soon he has your skirts gathered and holds you still, cockhead nudging against your folds before it catches and you begin to slowly sink down.
You grip his forearms, nails digging into the fabric of his shirt, brow furrowing as you try not to pull away. Despite coming from his tongue, Shamrock was thick, and the stretch wasn't pleasant. It feels like eons have passed before you are fully seated, pussy stuffed full as you shake and quiver in his lap. One arm curls around your hips, pulling you back to rest against his chest so that he can hook his chin over your shoulder.
âI'm going to keep you like this, darling. Stuffed full with my cock until I'm ready to come. You're going to stay right here while I get some work done.â
You drop your head back against his shoulder, lips brushing against his jaw, âYes, sir. As long as you need.â
#reader insert#one piece#one piece x reader#figarland shamrock x reader#figarland shamrock#shamrock one piece#shamrock x reader#one piece manga spoilers
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Widows rest
My take on a Black widow! Reader x Batman and Batfam but with a slight twist, reader doesn't know the Bats but they seem to know them...
Warning: contains avengers infinity war spoilers, black widow spoilers, mentions of injury, poor writing, ooc writing,
Part 15: skimming the surfaceâŠ
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âwhat happened.â
your voice nearly snaps out as you stare in at Bruce, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest Under the covers. Why is he here at his manor if he was in a car wreck?
Alfred shifts beside you, angling his head to stare at you with a morose expression, his eyes scarce meeting yours. âIt was a car accident, Master Wayne. Just as I explained on the way home.â
You glance at him with a raised brow, challenging his stare for once. âI know the why, I'm asking how the wreck happened. Driving under the influence? Texting and driving? Avoiding a jaywalker? Cars don't just wreck themselves, Alfred.â
He looks away, head tilting just slightly as his hands tuck behind his back and his stance squares, deceit? You sense a lie coming before he so much as opens his mouth.
âHe was on the way to a lunch break when his driver was cut off, apparently his executives wanted to continue their meeting over tea.â He meets your eye again, eyes narrowing as he studies you just as intently as you study him.
âConsidering the recent happenings, could it be targeted.â Your voice is steady as you speak, unblinking as he reacts, turning more fully to face you. âI doubt the attackers from last night are responsible for a little fender bender, what makes you say that?â
His expression relaxes a touch, brows raising in curiosity as he glances in at Bruce and back at you.
âthe timing is justâŠ. Odd. what are the odds of this happening the day after an attack, right when the CEO of a company leaving a meeting where there was concern about said company's property being targeted? I'd look into whoever the other party was if I were the investigator.â
You glance in at Bruce as well, watching him breathe deeply and slowly, whatever he's on seems to have him in a deep sleep, oblivious to the conversation happening in his doorway, unless he's just a heavy sleeper. The hint of bandages peeking out from under his gray tee confuses you, just why isn't he in a hospital?
ââŠ. You make a good enough case, I'll have a word with the insurance investigator about your concerns.â He nods to himself as if confirming something, he's slowly but surely letting his guard down around you. You're not sure how to feel about it. âGood, that'sâŠ.Good.â
You look away from them both before you say something foolish, are you so bored that you're giving yourself more paranoia? Looking for things to be wrong so you can rip everything apart at the seams, pretend you're not the only one hiding things?
Alfred nods his head as he gives Bruce a final glance, he straightens up and rests a hand on the doorknob, a silent end of the discussion for now. âYes, now I'm certain you're tired after therapy soâŠ. I'll call for you when dinners ready, master Wayne.â
And without waiting for a reply, he shuts the door with a soft click and turns away, shoulders sagging slightly as he shuffles off, he looks tired and wornâŠ
You take the hint and pad towards your own room, like hell you're just gonna sleep though.
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First thing that ticks you off is the lack of news, you lounge on top of the dark covers with the debugged phone in hand as you go through multiple media outlets, no news about Bruce Wayne, or Wayne enterprises, or anything about an unnamed rich man getting hit by a car. Even in the wake of last night's attack you know damn well that something like that would be reported on, especially mid day? Presumably in the city for anyone to see? People love to talk about the famous. Thrive on watching them through their screens. It makes you suspicious.
It takes a while to tap the GCPD police scanners, this phone is surprisingly hardy for all the programs you're shoving in it, still nothing. No reports or chatter about the billionaire at all, you knew Alfred was full of it, but making up a wreck? What's the old man playing at here.
You drop the phone on the pillow beside you and stare up at the ceiling, eyes narrowing as you ponder everything. The fires looked bad, too big and too quick to just have been normal alcohol fires. Maybe a fuel based starter? But who'd be stupid enough to put that in glass bottles and hold it in their hands? The kids were already squirrelly by the time you woke up, maybe afraid to go to school, but they should've been comfort seeking then. The body language was wrong there tooâŠ..how much do they know? Damn it all, too many theories and nothing to work with. you want answers and it seems youâre gonna have to work harder for them.
The kids are gone be the time dinners served, it's just you and Alfred again eating in tense silence while you both avoid the elephant in the room. he keeps his focus on his plate almost stubbornly so, body language closed off and uninviting.
âso where is everyone else tonight?â you give him a curious look as you set your fork down, trying to prompt him to answer as you casually lean forward on your elbows.
he sighs almost imperceptibly as he glances at you, picking up his teacup and slowly swirls the hot liquid inside. âthe same places they usually go, master wayne. the kids have practice, friends, responsibilities, and i believe you know where master bruce is.â he takes a long sip of his tea after speaking, glancing at you over his cup.
you tilt your head questioningly, brows raising as your fingers tap on the tabletop rhythmatically. âdo you think itâs safe?â he mimics your expression, confusion dancing across his face as he leans back in his chair. âhow do you mean?â
âi mean there was just an attack on the city, quick arrest or not i doubt itâs safe to be going out this late.â is this just an elite thing? surely bruce wouldnât let his underage kids out on the town right now of all times. right?
alfred gives you an odd look, looking you up and down scrutinizingly. ââŠ.youâre very paranoid about things today.â
âshould i not be.â your fingers pause, palm flattening against the table as you meet his stare.
an awkward silence stretches over the kitchenette, you and alfred staring at each other waiting for one to crack, the tension builds untilâŠthe notification system dings, someoneâs at the door.
alfred tenses and stands slowly, attention clearly shifting as he quietly excuses himself from the table. you want to bang your head on the table, why the hell is everyone so weird here? itâs like trying to wrestle information out of yelena.
youâre picking at your food when alfred shuffles back in the room, as soon as you glance at him you freeze, all the hair on your arms standing as air moves just behind you and you swing a butterknife on pure instinct.
your heart leaps up in your throat when something grabs you as soon as you even turned, what the fu-
âoop sorry about that! didnât mean to sneak up on ya.â a Midwestern accent apologizes beside you as the hand quickly loosens from your elbow, a dark haired man stands behind you with an apologetic expression on his face as he rubs at the back of his neck, heâs maybe Bruce's height, possibly a bit taller. broad as a barn and half as heavy. yet you didnât hear a single step, a single shift. itâs as if the big guy phased in the room behind you like vision.
trying to hide how startled you are you turn towards him and offer him a small smile. âwow youâre a quiet one, gonna give bat-man a run for his money haha.â you force a chuckle out, your heartbeat all the way in your throat, you havenât been snuck up on like that in a whileâŠ
âsorry, sorry. sometimes i forget how people donâtâŠanyways are you okay?â
his eyes flick to the butterknife in your grasp, you force yourself to quickly drop it on the table.
âiâm good, just a bit jumpy i guessâŠ.whoâre you?â his brows pinch together in confusion for a second before realization flicks across his face, he holds a hand out for you to shake. âwow i totally forgot about that, please forgive meâŠ.again, iâm clark. iâm bruce and yours friend.â you take his hand.
he smiles at you just as alfred shuffles over, extra teacup in hand and a confused look on his face as he glances between the both of you.
you ignore Alfred's judgement as your hand drops in your lap, this guy somehow avoided making a single sound with cleated boots on, even a widow would struggle on this flooring. something in the back of your mind is screaming at you to stay alert around him, like base animal instinct screaming thereâs a predator nearâŠhe also reminds you of captain rogers for some reason, the fidgeting of the hands and sincere whispered apologies reads just like the captain when he fucks up. you didnât think youâd miss the annoyingly endearing awkward politeness, but here you are.. âitâs fine iâm getting used to it, nice to meet you again clark.â
ânice to meet you again too, it's good to see you up and moving. I'm sorry I could only make it here when Bruce is down for the count. iâve been out of the country for a bitâŠâ Alfred clears his throat, interrupting your question before you could even ask, he moves to pull Clark aside, talking about refreshments and offering him a plate of food as if that was worth interrupting you for, even clark looks confused as the butler pulls him away, his eyes meeting yours for just a moment before the older man grabs his attention.
Frustration bubbles up on you once more when it feels like you're being kept out of the loop again, what does Clark know that you're not supposed to? Something akin to tempered rage clenches your fists and grinds your jaw like a spring pulled too hard, ready to snap back into place. When Alfred mentions taking a plate of food to Bruce you interrupt him.
âI'll bring it to him.â You're already standing up before you finish speaking, pushing your chair into the table as Alfred and Clark both glance at you with differing expressions.
âYou haven't finished your food yet, master WayneâŠ.â You don't even look at your plate as you step around the table, brushing past both men to grab the tray.
âI'm fine, my therapist said it's good for me to flex my motor skills as often as possible at home. I wanna check in on Bruce anyways, see how he's doing if he's up.â Alfred starts to speak but Clark drops a hand on his shoulder, giving him a small smile.
âI've been meaning to drop something off with you anyways AlfredâŠ.â
You miss the rest of his sentence as you stride out of the room, maybe it's time you question your husband.
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âyou awake?â
You rap your knuckles on the heavy door as you softly call out, the food tray balanced on one hand. For a moment you hear absolutely nothing within the room, maybe he's still passed out?
You're about knock again when the door pulls open, Bruce blinking blearily at you with a major case of bed head. You'd laugh if you weren't suddenly face to face with him, who's not wearing any pantsâŠ.
âHeyâŠ.â He mumbles dumbly, staring at you for a moment in a seeming daze. âHey. Can I come in?â You gesture to the food tray with your chin while shifting your hold on it.
âHmm?âŠ. Oh, yeah come onâŠ.â He steps aside as you wordlessly step in, casually kicking the door shut with your foot while he gives you a confused look. You'd like some privacy right now.
You set the tray down on the bedside table before turning your head to glance over at him.
âYou feeling okay? Heard you had a wild dayâŠâ that'd sound funny out of context, he just follows you to the bed and slowly sits on the edge with a grunt, eyes never quite leaving your form. ânot great, could be better I thinkâŠ. How long was I knocked out for?â he awkwardly runs a hand through his hair while shuffling closer to where your standing, you pass him a plate while trying to ignore his state of dress.
âdunno, how about you tell me.â Your hand grabs the edge of the table as you put on your most innocent look, you don't miss how he regards you when you lean down towards him a bit.
âWhat's that mean?â His eyes flick over you the briefest bit before he looks down at his plate, his Adams apple bobbing as he swallows.
ânothing, just wanted to know when you went down the stairs I guessâŠ.I think I've got the whole getting injured thing covered, you shouldn't try to give me a run for it.â You smile sweetly at him as you sit down beside him, his body language shifts again, leaning into you just slightly as you press close enough that your thighs touch. Just what you wanted.
âthis morning maybe? It's a bit of a blurâŠ. The kids thought it was so funny.â He sighs exasperatedly as he runs a hand through his hair again, messing up his bed head even more.
âi can see why.â When he gives you a sour look you snort, briefly leaning over him to grab at the thermos on the tray so you could steal some of his tea.
âoh you're so funny now, a real comedian.â He sounds exasperated but you're not fooled.
âMhmm, at least mine was better than tumbling down the stairs like a slinky.â
âThis isn't the pain Olympics you know, not my fault I'm very fragile.â He huffs again and turns his head to hide a small smile, then he slowly sets his hand just behind you on the bed, not quite pulling you in but definitely making moves to be close to you. Guess he likes being softcore bullied by you?
âwell you should still watch your damn step, there's enough brain damage going around as is.â You sneak a glance at the bandage under his sleeve, you're certain that's professionally applied. He rolls his eyes and chuckles quietly to himself while shaking his head.
âit's sweet how you're going soft on meâŠ..I missed seeing you like this.â
His tone gives you pause, that same saccharine tone full of affection just like in the hospital, it makes something resembling guilt curl behind your ribs and settle there. ââŠlike what?â
ââŠrelaxed. I know I kinda put you in an odd position when I brought you home to allâŠ. I'm just happy to see you laughing. Even if it's while mocking my pain.â he snorts at his own words and looks up at the ceiling, there's something kinda odd about seeing the reserved man act soâŠ. Light-hearted, you expected to have to work harder hereâŠ. Maybe it's the pain meds he's on?
Your take a long swig of the hot tea to give yourself a moments pause, how do you even respond to that? Even with all the deceit and close-door happenings his words and body language are honest. you've already confirmed what you wanted to know so why are you still here? âYourâŠour Friendâs here to see you.â
His eyes fall to meet yours again with no small amount of disappointment in them, he knows you're yet again denying an intimate moment, verbally retreating from him, he's slowly getting used to it.
âoh yeah?â the smile slowly returns as he tries to keep things light for you, even in his slightly dazed state heâs trying to be considerate of you, itâs uncomfortable.
You slowly stand up from the bed and stretch, looking away to hide a small smirk as you hand him the thermos that was technically supposed to be his. âMhmm, Clark's here. He said he's sorry you're so bad at walking on your own two feet.â
He scoffs loudly as he takes it from your grasp, eyes never leaving your form as he slowly raises it to his lips. âI have such a nice support system, I'm truly blessed. I'll hobble my way down there in a few.â
you nod as you glance around one last time, pretending not to notice the bottle of lidocaine gel on the dresser as you turn away and shuffle towards the door.
âOh, and one more thing Bruce?â you glance over your shoulder at him from the doorway, hand resting on the wood frame just above your head as you smile sweetly at his unsuspecting figure.
his eyes meet yours as he pauses eating, fork halfway to his mouth as he addresses you. âyes?â
âYou might wanna throw some pants on before you leave this room.â you have to suppress a snort as he quickly glances down at himself while you leave.
the smile slowly slips from your face as you stroll down the hallway towards your room instead of going back to the kitchenette, you know one thing without a doubt now, bruce and alfred are very good liars.
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M.list | prev | next
A/n: wow this one got away from me a bit, I think this is my longest chapter yet đ hope y'all like it and it was worth the wait. Hope y'all have an amazing day/night!
Taglist: @cxcilla @mercuryathens @dind1n @redsakura101 @ninihrtss @let-me-dance @ladykamos @one-piecelover @cuntiesweet @omnivirgo @shirp-collector-of-fixations @spidermanluvr444 @br33zy-blizzardz @4rachn3
#dc x y/n#dc x reader#batman x reader#batfamily x reader#batman fanfiction#bruce wayne x reader#batfam x reader#bruce wayne x gn!reader#bruce wayne x y/n#black widow reader
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"IN THE HEARTHFIRE'S EMBRACE"
a/n ; HALLOO:DD so, here's the first part of the "let the world burn" series inspired by the song of the same name from chris grey. more women will be added to the list as i go, so feel free to drop some suggestions which genshin women you think would be a great addition to the series. anywaay, thanks for readingg:))

-warning/s ; a bit of descriptive violence, mentions of blood and burning but not directed at the reader. -pairing/s ; arlecchino x fem!reader.
where in ; these women would go against every person in teyvat-- would even watch teyvat burn, all for your sake.
(men please dni utc!)
âLynette, whatever happens, keep your mother safe.â
The words rang in the little girlâs ears repeatedly as she held the older womanâs hands. They were not related by blood in any way, but this woman had taken care of her, raised her and nurtured her for as long as she could remember. So she keeps her fatherâs words, and protects the woman with what she has.
âThere they are! The wife of the Knave!!â
With an annoyed curse beneath a whisper, Lynette grabs onto your hand tightly, pulling you to run away as the spies have found you in your hiding spot. Tired, panting and breathless- your legs felt like it was about to give out, but thanks to the adrenaline spiking through your body, you just kept running, and running, and then finding yourself driven in a corner with nowhere to escape as the spies had surrounded you from all sides.
Despite being struck with fear, your motherly instincts came first as you held your precious daughter in your arms, wanting to protect her more than wanting to be protected by her.
âMother, I can⊠I can handle this!â Lynette exclaimed, but you knew better, it was two against half a dozen grown men and only Lynette was capable of fighting out of the two of you but her alone would not be enough to face them. âMy child, settle down, I'd rather die than witness you slain in front of me. Let me protect you, so hush.âÂ
You whispered, tears starting to form in the corner of your eyes as immense fear ran through your veins. You closed your eyes shut to brace yourself for impact, heart filled with dread as one of the men neared you with a blade of his own. He let out a sickly chuckle at your demise, the wife of the Knaveâs to be precise, then raising his arm up toâ
âFucking imbeciles.â
âto fall in front of you beheaded, with warm and thick blood splattered against you and the child in your arms. You opened your eyes to look up but you already knew who it was and to your horrific relief, it was your wife covered in blood who stood menacingly in the background. Her hand letting go of her scythe that she earlier held with a grip so tight, her hands trembled while she slayed the wretched men in blinded fury then she started to slowly walk towards you.
You gasped at the sight and immediately covered Lynette's eyes as she was no more than just a child who although you knew was no stranger to this kind of scenery, you still wanted to shield her from the gruesome sight. Nonetheless, still, you felt glee to see your wife.
As for said wife, Arlecchinoâs chest was heaving in pure, unfiltered wrath and with no remorse stepped upon the menâs lifeless bodies in a rather harsh manner. Her sharp, pointed heels stabbed itself into the flesh as she made her way towards you through the fire she had caused in the midst of tearing the men apart just a few moments ago.
â but as soon as she reached you, the look in her eyes softened and all hostility she held had instantly melted away. Replaced by a vulnerable and fragile display of guilt and fear as the apathetic mask sheâd mastered to put on for years straight had cracked for a brief moment out of fear for you. âMy beloved, I am deeply sorry for arriving so late...â she apologized and her tone sounded so different than how she insulted the man who almost killed you. She gently pulled you up into her arms and held you and her daughter with a relieved sigh.Â
âI didn't realize that a few had escaped and chased after you, my beloved. I am terribly, terribly sorry for making such a horrible mistake.â Her voice was shaky and you knew that behind the tough exterior she tried to put on, her heart was broken beyond a million pieces at the thought of almost losing you.Â
âMy dear, it is alright. Lynette kept me safe, and we are alive.â You tried to reassure her, but at the moment you had mentioned the word âaliveâ, the intense emotions kicked in as she was reminded of the fact that if she arrived just even a second late, you and her daughter wouldâve been dead along with the men that lay on the ground. The raging embers of fury ignited once more, so she separated for a moment to summon countless burning crimson blades in thin air one after another, embedding it into the lifeless bodies that lay on the ground. After her little outburst, she looked at the burning men with a glare and held you tightly to keep you safe and secure to provide you solace, amidst the burning chaos of flames that surrounded all three of you.
âMy beloved, if you were to die at the hands of such crooked men, tainted and ruined, I could never find it in my heart to watch the world prosper without you as itâd have no meaning at all.â
She spoke with such conviction that it felt like a comforting flame that soothed the fear in your heart but to those who dare lay a finger on you, this served as a threat as this same woman who held you and your child with such a gentle hold and looked at you with tender eyes swearing that she would be capable of attempting to kill the Tsaritsa with her bare hands in a heartbeatâ if it meant protecting you.
There is no sane bone in her body, that was indeed a fact, but if you were to be taken away from her then sheâd be willing to watch the world go poof, drowned in the flames of her agony of your loss if it were to ever happen.
#arlecchino x reader#arlecchino genshin impact#arlecchino x female reader#lilac writesđ#we all love arle in this blog
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Hey hey! Yeah ive noticed when it comes to actual toxic shadowvanilla (or even closer to cannon) they dont get in depth of it. It feels like theres something MISSING! Ackkkkkkk i am a beliver of them being mutually toxic to each other (especially tr) If TR did for some reason truly became a cookie of decite, it would not end well for either of them! Think about it, shadow milk wants someone who understands BUT how he wants Pure vanilla to be a cookie of decite. And and shadow milk so caught up in his joy didnt even notice the cannon betryal, then take that and up it with truthless recules. Tr would 100% be lying for his own gain, probably notice shadowmilks emotional weakness and twist it like a KNIFE! The roles would be reversed! Shadowmilk is the puppet now, yet he doesnt KNOW it! So blinded by his loneiess, and the need to have someone to understand him! That he allowed himself be used (quite ironic if you think about it) cuz PV normally is not one to show his emotions in his sprites (other than his staff and well shadowmilk meddling) AND HE ISNT A OWO MAN!!! Sick of the owo man treatment! TR is that but UPPED!! A cookie of decite who doesnt express his emotions, able to twist it however he likes. Like i can see this as a Sm thinks hes the puppet master, while being the puppet. Tr lets him think that!!! Its easier to maulipate someone if they think their in control. Its MESSY! (I cannot put into words how messed up this situation would be) shadow milk you FOOL! Youve created your own MONSTER! One who sees you as a means to a end, a PUPPET. False fluff, fapse happiness, false LOVE! What TR gives you is a LIE and even if theres truth in it YOU DONT KNOW IT, YOU COUNDNT EVEN TELL WHEN HE PULL OFF A LIE! (In cannon) YOU are now in the web of lies of your own creation, Tr is your spider!! Anyway uh thats a little bit of what this dymatic makes me go crazy over (i have more ideas....)
ANON YOU FUCKKING GET IT OH MY GOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS REAL!!!!!!! I LOVE TOXIC YAOIIII!!!!
I'm gonna fucking yap about PV characterization (AGAIN.) (I just love him so fucking much.)
Very Long LONG post. XP
I'm so happy right now because you UNDERSTAND that PV isn't just some fucking UwU bean guy. Like, this is why he's so fucking good at being a leader because of his EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE and that he DOESN'T get caught up by his emotions and focuses on the problems even if it's stressful. Like a scene in Odyssey where Dark Cacao gets MAD when Clotted Cream had the idea of wanting the powers of the Soul Jam but Pure Vanilla remained calm as ever(And all of the sprites used this scene have his eyes open. He is SERIOUS.) Out of the WHOLE Ancients, despite his youthful, brighter amd unchanging appearance (and that's why his Korean Va is a girl to convey his youthfulness) he is the nost mature because he tries to Understand the situation and not diving head first. He isn't a warrior, but he is skilled involving emotions BUT he keeps DOUBTING himself at first like "I can't believe I did that! But I'd do anything for my friends to protect them."
AND THEN SHADOW MILK COOKIE COMES IN!!!! Omg Shadow Milk Cookie, DO NOT unlock the full potential of that Skill Pure Vanilla- I man Truthless Recluse has(Emotional Intelligenceđ LEVEL UP! âĄïž Emotional Manipulationđ) that he made you look stupid by making YOU think that YOU are the one IN CONTROL!
LOOK AT HOW HE DOES IT BY MAKING SMILK THINK HE'S IN CONTROL!!




En got "You and I... were meant to be together."âïž The shadowvanilla shippers are really feeding on this line omg.
Kr got "I guess I have to accept you... Or become a part lf you."â
ïž THAT'S WHAT I WANTED TO SEE!!!! EMOTIONAL MANIPULATION AT IT FINEST BAYBEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! MAKE HIM THINK HE'S THE ONE PULLING YOUR STRINGS WHEN YOU'VE ALREADY SLITHERED YOUR WAY THROUGH HIS MASK!!!! UUUGGHH SMILK YOU MADE HIM BETTER THAN YOUUU
That's why I kept mentioning that PV is KIND, and not Nice and he is pretty much capable of incredible violence. Does anyone even REMEMBER PV having enough seeing his friends suffer when he was the last one standing that he tries TO KILL DARK ENCHANTRESS?? He does a lot of things that involves he SACRIFICING HIMSELF in the process. UGHHH!! FUCK!! PURE VANILLA COOKIE IS NOT NICE!! HE WANTED TO KILL SHADOW MILK COOKIE!!! Remember the "Crash Out" scene? That's his true emotions having throwing a suprise party. He had ENOUGH. Then the scenery changes that made him remember that he wasn't supposed to be a violent person. He's an angel! đđ Silly Vanillyyy, why would you say "I'M GOING TO DESTROY YOU!!" that isn't like you at all!! [sarcasm](He is literally holding back the rage every single fucking day of his life.)
As much as people love to draw PV hugging Smilk closing to the end of the Ep, he literally beats him up and people seem to forget that over thinking PV is nice Uwu It doesn't have to be this way Shadow Milk Cookie. Meanwhile in the Korean version, Awakened PV had a dialogue that went, "I like helping people but I had enough of your shit Shadow Milk Cookie.âșïž" Pure Vanilla Cookie said calmly. (Link to the video I made with this line.) And then made shooting stars of Truth descend from the sky to attack him. He did say he wanted Smilk to be his friend, but he wouldn't back down in a fight anymore. That's why his Awakened "Compassionate" or "Comprehender"(in Korean) form finally showing his real role that he is a MAGIC TYPE all along who has been disguised under the role of a HEALER.
Anyway TR â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€ SMILK. TOXIC YAOI REAL!! Two Cookies of Deceit. One emotional and one empty. Smilk may be the best at psychological warfare and torture, but he got himself an emotional manipulator. Tr easily takes advantage of his emotions because he acts like a child!! Just give him what he wants then he'll be satisfied in no time. Take it away from him, he's gonna have his tantrums again.
Noe I couldn't add more tbh. You explained it well and all I could do is smash the TRUE over and over.
Even with my interpretation of canon that Tr won't last long with Smilk because of the Friendship Gang and "the universe couldn't allow this! One of you turn "good" now!", I like to think the toxicity still lives through Awakened PV since he's both Truth AND Deceit. Like a bright star from light years away that's actually dead, he could still act as of he were still TR to make Smilk more paranoid and obsessed with him in a more fucked up secretive way that other people wouldn't even notice because PV is already good! He wouldn't do evil things again, right? Hehe.
Also sharing this twt post of Tr ripping Smilk's eye as well. đ„°đ„°đ„°
https://x.com/41n4v15/status/1896085874628087843
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SSR Idia Shroud - Room Relaxation Vignette
"Happy Birthday"
[Mister S's Mystery Shop]
Idia: âŠHrrm, I can't find the 15th Anniversary special Star Rogue diorama.
Idia: I told Sam-shi I'd look for it myself, so I wouldn't have to deal with him talking to me, but⊠There's way too much stuff here to look through!
Idia: And I came all this way 'cause I wasn't fast enough to get it online.
Idia: I can't go back empty-handed after telling Ortho that there's no way I wouldn't get my hands on one as a number one fanboy!
Idia: Oho? This shelf over here has a ton of specialty figures and other hobby stuff⊠EEHHHH!?
[products fall of shelf]
Idia: OUCH! OW OW OW!!
Jack: Woah!? That was close! Some of the falling goods almost scraped by my noseâŠ
Idia: I-I-I didn't do anything! They just fell off on their own since they were thrown haphazardly onto the shelf!!
[Idia runs away]
Jack: Huh? No one said it was your fault or nothin'âŠ
Jack: âŠWhat the, he's already gone! Idia-senpai⊠He looks slow and frail, but is he secretly actually pretty nimble?
Jack: Oh, man, and he just left everything on the ground. Ugh, I guess I'll have toâŠ
Jack: âŠHm? Isn't this box the one Ortho mentioned todayâŠ?
[Ignihyde Dorm â Idia's Room]
Idia: âŠHaah. And in the end, I just ran away⊠Without a Star Rogue dioramaâŠ
Idia: It's all because they sold it first-come-first-serve, instead of pre-order... Not my fault what happened earlierâŠ
Idia: If I went back now, that terrifying beast of a man from Savanaclaw might still be there. I'll try again tomorrowâŠ
Idia: K. Now that I've decide that, time to get all the annoying dorm work stuff done!
Idia: Uhhh, so, the notices I have to give the other dorm students are⊠Oh, right, the equipment replacement schedule, and the AC inspection time.
Idia: Just in case, I'll add "Important", "Good News", "Response Required", and "Read Immediately" to the subject⊠K, sent.
Idia: It sure is hard work bein' a Housewarden. Thought it's not that bad since I implemented a chat app once I became Housewarden.
Idia: Efficiency above all! No face-to-face meetings! Conserving my own energy is the best way to do things!
Idia: Finished all my Housewarden tasks, and even took a shower, as annoying as it is. I'm awesome. I'd give myself 100,000,000 points out of 100.
Idia: Nice, so⊠It's finally me time!
[Ignihyde Dorm â Idia's Room]
Idia: Ah, I got a message from Ortho⊠He's spending the night in the first year rooms, huh.
Idia: Then, I guess I can just game all night by myself! Fheeheehee!
 [beep, beep!]
Idia: Hm� What's with this reminder� Man, right when I was getting into things.
ăSurvey on Quality of Life Improvements for the Student Bodyă
Idia: Ugh.. Right, that was a thing. You don't really see paper surveys anymore. Let me think, it should be around⊠Yep, here it is.
Idia: Uhhh, so what, they want to know what I'd like improved? I mean, kinda late to ask a third-year, isn't it? I can't really think of anything.
Idia: Sides, there were stuff I used to not like about the dorm, but I already made upgrades to all that stuff.
Idia: We soundproofed the walls and floors, installed commercial-grade AC, and the dorm-wide servers are of my own technical specs.
Idia: To live the perfect shut-in life, we can't not have walls that can't take loud shouting, or ACs that can't keep overclocked PCs cool, soïœ
Idia: âŠAh, wait a mo'. I just thought of one issue I got. "There's not enough electrical outlets"!!
Idia: This kinda stuff needed specialized qualifications to do, so it's not like I coulda bought the parts and DIY it.
Idia: I'm using a power strip for now 'cause I have to, but I hate how the wiring just looks like spaghetti. Even a master wiring tech like myself can't stand a sight like that!
Idia: Oh, I just thought of one more thing. "I want to have the low-capacity breaker replaced"!
Idia: It's so weak that the breaker flips just 'cause I try to have 4 computers, the server, a 3D printer, microwave, and electric kettle all plugged in at once!
Idia: I mean, I'd set up a UPS (uninterruptible power supply) system in case of emergencies, so my computers and server was fine, but...
Idia: Because of that, my plan to add an AC unit and a refrigerator in my room went out the window. That was a nightmare. Oh, andâŠ
Idia: âŠDyehehe. I said I couldn't really think of any, but it's hilarious how the ideas keep flowin' out.
Idia: I'll attach some of the numbers we have on the cost of estimated damages by having Ignihyde students continue to use those useless breakers.
Idia: The Headmage is pretty much influenced by profits, so. If I explain how it's necessary to get better equipment, then he might listen to improvement suggestions.
Idia: Nice, mission clear. Time to watch some new anime episodes while grinding levels in my gams.
Idia: See, nothing beats watching anime while mindlessly leveling⊠Ooh, I pulled a rare one!
Idia: I thought I'd be bored of this anime 3 episodes in, too, but it's actually starting to get interesting!
Idia: Well, now that the mood's getting good, I just gotta let loose! TIME FOR A SNACK PARTY!!
Idia: âŠHuh? I'm out of my favorite snack. Ugh, I completely forgot to re-order some more when I ate all of it last time.
Idia: If only the Mystery Shop had 24-hour delivery service⊠Maybe I should add that to the survey?
Idia: Nah, nevermind, I should just focus on the anime. NOTHING'S GONNA BRING ME DOWN!
Idia: Woah, the animation's cleanâŠ! They're all movin' so smoothly⊠Maybe the production team changed this week?
Idia: I'm getting pretty into the main theme song, too! Heehee, fheeheeheeâŠ!
[Ignihyde Dorm â Idia's Room]
Idia: Urrghnn⊠AaarghhâŠ
[ïœâȘ]
Idia: Gah! Urgh, what's that noise� What time is it right now�
Idia: Urk! Everything's so bright, I can't see anything⊠How's it morning alreadyâŠ? Wait, before that, where'd that noise come fromâŠ!?
Idia: Huh� Ortho� Weren't you spending the night with the other first years� Oh wait, is this just a message�
Idia: "HAPPY BIRTHDAY"âŠ? Oh, right, today's my birthday! I completely forgot, since there wasn't anything to look forward toâŠ
Idia: I'll just write back⊠Thanks, Ortho.
Idia: UrpâŠ! But now I feel a bit sickâŠ! And my whole body hurtsâŠ!
Idia: I fell asleep running my games, and I'm just stiff all over. Can't I just go move to my bed and go back to sleep?
Idia: Nah, if I end up crashing and forget to login and get all the birthday login voice lines, I'll never recover. Gotta wash my face or somethingâŠ
Idia: Woah, I can see how crazy my bedhead is reflected in the monitor! I think this every time, but why does my hair end up this bad whenever I fall asleep at my desk?
Idia: Kinda looks punk, but that's totally a different vibe from my usual, lawl.
Idia: Meh, my hair can be whatever. Not like anyone looks at me, anyway.
Idia: It's a pain to go all the way to the washroom⊠I'll just use magic like I normally do. I'll chill the water, then.
[splash!]
Idia: WHEEEEW, THAT COLD WATER HITS JUST RIGHT!!
Idia: Normally, I'd just leave it here, but⊠My face feels so dry after pulling that all-nighter.
Idia: But I'm all good. I'm a functioning nerd, so I know how to fix it.
Idia: Ta-daïœ I don't really get it, but here I go with the number one most popular all-in-one creamïœ
Idia: Putting on lotion and moisturizer one at a time is a waste of time. Just plap it on, and ta-da, done. Next is my clothesâŠ
Idia: Nah, nevermind, I'm not gonna change. Now all I have to do is to jump into all my games and collect the birthday login voice lines. Fheeheehee.
Idia: Perf, I've gotten them all for now. âŠHuh? There's another message from OrthoâŠ
Idia: âŠHUH!? HE GOT THE 15TH ANNIVERSARY SPECIAL STAR ROGUE DIORAMA!? SERIOUSLY!?
Idia: "I was planning on picking it up in the Mystery Shop after classes, but if you can't wait, you can go pick it up whenever"�
Idia: Well, I gotta go right now, then! That means I have to finish getting ready.
Idia: I don't really wanna go outside, but⊠I can't keep my poor Star Rogue waiting! Hyah!
[Idia magics hair and clothes]
Idia: K, bedhead fixed. And now, onwards, to the Mystery Shop!!
[Main Street]
Idia: FheeheeheeâŠ! Look at this craftsmanshipâŠ! It looks just like the scene I imagined as a kid!
Idia: Ortho⊠Did you look for this Star Rogue diorama because you knew I was sad I didn't get it?
Idia: Wheewïœ The best thing in the world is a little brother who thinks the world of his older brother, and is really good at search functionsïœ!
Jack: Hm? Is that⊠Idia-senpai? Good morning.
Idia: GYAAAAAA!? J-Jack-shi� Why are we making contact two days in a row�
Jack: I mean, it's not really anything, but⊠I heard from Ortho yesterday that today was your birthday, is all.
[Idia runs away]
Jack: Happy Birthday. So, uh, did you get what you were lookingâŠ
Jack: Huh, he's already gone! Ugh, I don't get him at all.
Requested by @farfalla049.
#twisted wonderland#twst#idia shroud#jack howl#twst idia#twst jack#twst translation#twst birthday#mention: ortho#mention: crowley
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Student Teaching

Callie had transferred to the school I taught at for her senior year. As soon as she arrived there were rumors swirling about why she'd had to change schools. I tried to avoid that kind of stuff, though. It wouldn't be the first time a pretty girl who was confident in her self got tarred with a sexually explicit brush. Still, there was no avoiding the fact that she didn't act like any of the students I'd had before. There was really no better way to say it than that she was seductive. She seemed almost to want to be sexualized; being the object of public desire and resentment, having people whispering behind her back. It all seemed to make her more powerful. Soon she started amassing her little band of followers. Girls started blowing off lessons like she did, sitting in the back of the class gossiping. Makeup got heavier, outfits got skimpier. The atmosphere in the halls seemed to get more sexual. Soon the boys started changing to meet the girls new desires. The school jocks had always been a tame bunch, more known for being friendly if not enormously bright. As they fell under this new energy, however, they started to feel more like alpha males. Muscles swelled for purely aesthetic reasons. Aggressiveness levels rose. They acted possessive in the halls, arguing and even fighting each other for the attention of one barely legal tart or another.
It was hard to deny that these changes seemed to stem from Callie's arrival. Our school was becoming two, with super foxy girls and alpha male boys gliding above the forgotten rest, who faced increasing scorn. The whole atmosphere felt increasingly toxic, and Callie was right at home in this new world. She manipulated like a master, encouraging girls to worship her and pursue shallow, bitchy femininity, and pushing boys to compete for her attention by clashing with other alphas or bullying betas. Those betas she determined below her notice became the carriers of homework loads for popular students more interested in their own looks. I finally decided to speak to Callie. I knew it was slightly crazy to suspect a student of having so much influence on their peers, and definitely crazy to assume it to be nefarious rather than just a result of popular dynamics amplified by a girl so in control of herself.
Nevertheless, I found myself nervously approaching the clique of slutty brats that surrounded her at all times after a particularly disruptive class where only the first row could even hear me over their loud, bitchy gossiping and giggling. When Callie met my eye, the girls shifted away, reacting subconsciously to the desires of their leader. I could have sworn I even saw the spark of triumph in the girl's eyes. After I started dancing around the subject of changing behaviors at school she just smirked.
"Well I'm glad someone has noticed." My shock at her admission was immediately overtaken by the sudden realization of how sexy this girl was. Her looks had become even more dramatic since her arrival had upended the school culture. Her plump, pouty lips turned every comment into a provocation.
"You mean you admit there's been a change?"
"Well duh. When I got here everyone was totally lame. Now this place is fitting for a queen bee like me."
"What did you do?"
"I just brought out everyone's true selves. It turns out most people enjoy giving in to temptation if you let them." As she said this she came closer to me. I couldn't stop focusing on the curve of her breasts. I knew they would feel so good in my hands. I didn't even really notice stepping forward myself as she continued to talk, lowering her voice to a seductive whisper. "I think you're just jealous, aren't you sir? You think I'm a hot little piece of ass, and you're tired of not being able to say it. I know you're only in teaching for the easy access to hot, easy sluts. A big strong man like you, teaching math? It's a joke. You just use your position to encourage girls to become increasingly vapid, bitchy bimbos, and boys to become alpha studs like you. Anyone who can't measure up doesn't deserve the attention of people like us." As she spoke I felt her acrylic nails caressing my cock through my pants. I could have sworn my cock wasn't that big the last time it got hard, if I could still remember anything before this moment totally clearly. Everything she said made perfect sense though, and totally jelled with the fact that I was about to fuck this girl into oblivion. I love this school.
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hiii ^^ can u write ab how perverted each JJK man is? plz plz plz includ choso!!!!! i luv my little bbg
Dirty Little Pervert!
HOW PERVERTED ARE THEY?
[Gojo, Geto, Nanami, Choso, and Toji]

18+ viewer discretion is advised
fem!reader/JJK MEN Warnings: established relationship, fem!dom!reader [Gojo], sub!Gojo, anal fingering, dumbification, public sex, dub-con, exhibitionism, slave play, pet/master, hair pulling, degradation, spanking/flogging, bratty!reader [Nanami], brat taming, dacryphilia, daddy kink, mutual masturbation, sex toys, Choso's is really sweet, hunter/prey, consensual non-consensual [Toji] breeding kink, biting, blood play [blood drinking] Word count: 1941 DESC: How perverted are each JJK man on a scale from 1 to 5?
I actually had so much fun with this! I've never done a multi-fic before I'd love to do more!
This is not my most well written fic but hey it's something!
Satoru Gojo: â
â
â©â©â© Submissive/Dominant
Satoru Gojo was the most pathetic man you had ever been with. You had never heard a man cry and whimper more than him, which was strange because when you first met him you had him completely wrong. From the way he acted and from how he presented himself, you pegged him for a dominant guy who liked to fuck submissive girls. You initially thought it would be a problem, being a dom yourself. So it surprised you when you heard him casually admit to being a sub.Â
âI like a real dominant woman. Someone who can fuck my smug attitude outta me.â That was all he needed to say. Because soon thatâs exactly what you did.Â
You just used your fingers, pumping them in and out of his tight little hole. He was already so sensitive thatâs all he needed to become a slobbering and filthy mess. You watched as the boy you knew as cocky and conceded fall apart, whimpering and crying out that he wanted more.
âYou like that slut?â You smirked, arching your fingers to touch his sensitive prostate. Satoru moaned, nodding his head against the bed. Both of his hands were gripping the sheets and his back arched as he felt a wave of pleasure shoot through his cock. Heâd already cum several times, writhing around in it. But he still wanted more. And not to mention, you wouldnât let him leave until you milked him completely and utterly dry.Â
âM-mommy.. Please.. F-f.. mmm⊠shit.. Mm-fuck.. Fuck.. fuck me⊠p-please!â He sobbed into the cushion, jerking his hips to the sensation. It wasnât long before he felt it get too intense and he spilled out again onto the bed, screaming out with pleasure. He threw his head up and arched even more that he possibly could. All from your plush little fingers. You hadnât even begun to stroke his cock or fondle his balls and he was completely and utterly gone. He was in a haze, fucked dumb from your digits.Â
âMoreâŠâ he rasped, looking over at you with his tongue sticking out, âI want⊠more..â
Suguru Geto: â
â
â
â
â© Exhibitionist and slave play
Suguru wasnât one for hiding his perverted nature. You shouldnât have been surprised when you both came home from a late day at the office and he was beginning to pull down your pencil skirt. One hand pulled at the hem while the other used little force to push you stomach-first against the hood of his car. You let out a breathy gasp and turned back to him, trying to see what exactly he was doing.
âSuguru?â You asked, trying to get an idea as to what was about to happen. You didnât want to admit but you were already soaking wet. You knew with the nature of your relationship he didnât need to ask, if your master wanted to fuck you you knew to oblige. No matter where you two were.Â
He pressed his raging boner against your ass and let that speak volumes. He hadnât been able to concentrate without thinking about fucking you in public. He wanted everyone to hear you moan that he was yours and no one could ever fuck you like that. He wanted you to cry and choke on his cum as he pounded into from the back. Suguru wanted everyone to know who owned you.Â
Your skirt came off and fell down to your ankles, revealing your underwear. He inhaled sharply and pulled his cock out from his slacks, letting it hit your fat ass with a small noise. It was within seconds that he was inside you. You gasped and arched your back, feeling one of his hands on the small of your back and the other grabbing your hair, pulling you back to him.Â
âYou like that, huh? Whore? Little pathetic slut?â Suguru spat in your ear, making your pussy throb in between your legs. You were the most self-respectable girl, never letting anything get to you. But in your sex life⊠you were a different person. You were a total slut for your husband, doing anything and everything to please him.Â
Kento Nanami: â
â
â
â©â© Spanking and Brat taming
Kento wasnât a very perverted guy at all, heâd only ever really think about that stuff when he was with you. You never pegged him for the guy who was into going to fetish bars or doing ACID on a Tuesday night, and you were right. However, you didnât account for the fact he had his own kinks and ways of pleasuring himself. He never admitted but he enjoyed his fair share of BDSM, only with the right person of course. When you came in, with your bratty nature and your big innocent eyes⊠he wanted to corrupt you. He wanted to cum on your tits and force you to lick it off or give you a piece of his mind after a long day of work, fucking into you with no care for your own personal boundaries at all. But⊠he restrained himself enough to limit his kinks to a select few things.
So you found yourself, bent over on his lap with a flogger in his hand, while his other lifted up your pink skirt. Of course, you didnât wear underwear. He had gotten used to the fact you were the pervert in this relationship, doing everything to get a rise out of him. And it worked. You had been able to make him so sexually frustrated it was pissing him off. He needed to tame you and make you bend to his will over and over, and over again.Â
Of course, it would only make you behave for about a week before you started to test his patience again, and then the cycle would repeat. And god he loved it.
âOkay dirty girl,â he spoke gently, âRemember if you stop counting I start over,â and with one fell swoop the flogger smacked your ass. You let out a whimper and threw your head back, counting the first number.
After a few more spanks from the flogger you hazily looked over at him, drool pooling on your bottom lip and dripping onto the floor, âI.. mm.. I forgot⊠my place,â you let out a hiss as Kento frowned and raised his hand, slapping your ass with enough force to make you cry out. âMm! Iâm sorry!â You let out a sob before he smacked it again, âD-daddy Mm.. mm sorry!âÂ
âYouâre going to show me how sorry you really are, okay?â He raised an eyebrow as you, looking you over as your body shook. You didnât realize it but he was so incredibly hard it was becoming painful for him.
Choso Kamo: â
â©â©â©â© Mutual masturbation
Choso actually isnât that much of a pervert! Choso had never found himself interested in BDSM or crazy sex. He preferred the romantic aspect of a relationship over the sexual, which he was very glad you did too. There was nothing he really wanted to try or had a desire to do. All he really wanted was to be close to you in any way possible. So maybe there was one thing. He wanted to see how you pleasured yourself when you were all alone. He wanted to see how you touched yourself to the thought of him, and he wanted to show you how he touched himself to you.Â
When he suggested the idea you thought it was really sweet and agreed. It made him happy to think you wanted to be as close to him as he wanted to be with you. You watched as your boyfriend shyly peered over at your exposed pussy, glistening just for him. You placed your small vibrator over your clit, letting out a faint sigh at the new sensation. Just watching you begin to please yourself made a small jolt of electricity travel through his cock.
âBabyâŠâ You cooed, motioning for him to lay beside you. Choso nodded and laid back, resting his head against your shoulder, âYou wanna touch yourself too?âÂ
âMmhmâŠâ He nodded, looking down at his growing erection. It took a few seconds before he was freed from his pants and sopping wet from his precum. He shyly placed his hand around his shaft and stroked upwards, before focussing on his tip. You watched him with a curious expression, slowly rubbing circles around your clit with your bullet vibrator. You let out a small moan as you watched him massage the slit on his tip, before going back to stroking his length again. All the while, his eyes were on you. Your face and the cute expressions you were making.Â
This felt more intimate than sex. A way to be close to one another without truly touching each other. Even though he longed desperately to touch some part of you, thatâs why he was leaning his side against yours. Your warmth and your smell were so comforting, it was all he needed to masturbate near you. He really, really loved you.
Toji Zenin: â
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Hunter/prey and CNC
Toji wins. Toji fucking wins. Heâs the most perverted man youâve ever met. The first thing he asked you when you walked up to him at that bar was your bra size, and that same night he was taking it off with one hand. Your relationship was purely sexual from the moment it began and you both loved it. You would do any kink or any weird thing he suggested, as he would for you. As long as it meant he got to breed your pretty pussy in the end.Â
Today you both had decided on something⊠out of the norm. It was dead of night, maybe 3 AM? And you were in a lovely wooded area, running for your life. Behind you, you heard something chasing after you. Maybe it was a beast, maybe it was a man, you couldnât tell. Toji was supposed to be chasing you, but it had been so long since you had seen him that you werenât sure what was behind you anymore. You looked down at your surroundings but it was pitch black, the only thing you could see were a few branches in front of you. You still saw them yet you tripped.Â
You fell face-first into a pile of leaves, scrambling when you heard⊠growling. A large hand grabbed your shirt and you gasped, struggling against it. You could barely see, you didnât realize he had leaned down and began to bite you. You let out a cry, âAgh! S-stop!â You continued to struggle, whimpering when the man behind you broke skin and started to suck on the blood seeping from your neck.Â
âPretty thing. Shame⊠Mâ gonna fuck you so good,â Toji whispered, throwing you back into the ground. He was giving you a chance to run, to escape. But you didnât want to. It was so fun to role play, to pretend you were in any real danger. You knew even though your relationship was sexual heâd kill for you and your tight pussy.
âPleaseâŠâ You cried as you felt your pants rip from the top down, exposing your ass, âLeave me aloneâŠâ You buried your head into the leaves, a large hand grabbing your hair and pulling you up.Â
âI said Iâm gonna fuck you good. Now stay quiet you fucking brat,â Toji pushed you down, making you squeal in pain as he slapped your ass a few times. Your skin stung and you knew this was just the beginning of a long sexual experience with your lovely sneaky link, Toji.
#gojou satoru x reader#geto x reader#getou suguru x reader#choso kamo x reader#nanami x reader#toji x reader#x reader smut#x reader#jjk x you#jjk x reader#ryiju-muunie writing
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