#THE SWELLING IS GONNA BE SO BAD

[lunarflare64]

OUR KNEES ARE GETTING HOT AND WE RAN OUT OF ANTI-INFLAMMATORIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEESSSSSSSS

[yeyinde]

literally just got my medusa re-done and it might need to be surgically removed because the piercer used the smallest bar imaginable and put the ball on so crookedly that a grown ass adult couldn't take her off. even with pilers 🫠 y'all. if a sketchy uncle ever says "i know a guy" and that guy tells you he prefers smaller bars because he's too lazy to swap them out later on so just don't swell (A NATURAL BODILY REACTION TOTALLY UNCONTROLLABLE). run. don't walk. SPRINT!!!

[guess-i-do-art]

Time for my monthly Villain Lars AU hyperfixation :P

If anyone has any questions at all I’d be MORE than happy to answer them I am FrEaKiNg OuT over this loser rn

Tiny flowy fullbodies are fun to draw I recommend it :D

[hiddenbeks]

i love. having ibd

[pochapal]

before i put my foot in my mouth over the phone to the doctor i need to know if there's like. an agreed upon level of side effects you're expected to just put up with when taking longterm meds or if i have a legit grievance that is worth reassessing what i'm on because i feel like such a whiny fraud lol.....

[bobasnonbeliever]

only posting this here because i dont think anyone will see it. i need to get this out

im so fucking tired of my life. im tired of caring, like, in general. as stupid as it sounds, i was watching kitchen nightmares, and gordon said something about a chef or an owner, i dont remember exactly, he said; "losing hope is a scary thing to do, when theres just no more light at the end of the tunnel, it takes you down dark paths." or something like that. and ive been suicidal/depressed since i was 9, but i thought to myself "im not hopeless, am i?". the more i thought about it, the worse i felt because, god no, im not hopeless. im helpless, or maybe i wallow too much in my own self pity. i dont know the difference. every goddamn day feels like another waking nightmare, im sick of living with my mom, im sick of her not letting me get a job. i dont want my name on the damn electric bill because shes over $1,000 in debt to the power company anymore. shes already ruining my credit, and i dont even have a damn job! not to mention her fucking kid, her 5yo fucking kid, im taking care of. the product of the man who beat me over and over again, threatened to kill me, and then he took a greyhound bus out of our lives. why didnt she protect me? he never once hit her, or anyone else, why didnt mom help me? i was only 13 when he first pulled me by my hair and slammed me into the stairs because i let moms ice cream tub melt on the kitchen table for half an hour. it took him till my brother was 3 to leave. she valued him over me, and even now. im always taking care of my brother, even when he screams at me, cusses at me, throws things at me, spits on me, hits me, kicks me, claws me, bites me, and more. you get the point. she never even tells him to stop, she doesnt have to scream, or hurt him, or anything. just please, please tell them to stop hurting me. i still take care of him. i take care of him when she takes 20 fucking benadryl and passes out for the full time shes at home between shifts. i sacrificed my education to "help her" take care of him. and she gets mad at me when i parent him, when i tell him off, or even more mad when i have to cry and beg him to stop hurting me. she says "youre 22 years old, get a grip" when im covered in bruises from the 5 year old "hes five!" she will scream when i tell her he hurts me. "he is five, hes supposed to listen to you" i said once, and she just stared at me. im always fucking things up, she never fails to let me know, when she looks at me like that i know its my fault. i cant even begin on my relationship, i shouldnt, he might see this. i just want to give up, im so tired of caring, i want to let it all go. my dog died, i ruined him too, i couldnt take him to the vet i couldnt help him. hes gone because i failed. my baby, im not saying that in the cringy melinial way, he saved me from suicide. so many times, it was "hell be so confused why im gone..", "hes gonna miss me", "whos gonna take care of him?" but now hes gone and im still here. my baby, is gone and im so selfishly still here. why wouldnt she let me get a job? i couldve taken him, i couldve at least got him put down so he didnt have to suffer in his favourite spot on my bed till his kidneys put him down for us. if i didnt know, my boyfriend would kill himself too when he comes home from classes tomorrow, and i was dead, i would take the entire 160 count bottle of benadryl i stole from moms room. i want to see my baby, he never ever missed on helping me, i owe him my life and couldnt even give him that when he passed. but not for lack of trying.

but even so, i dont feel hopeless. maybe only yearning, but it feels enough like hope. when i use my right hand to stroke my left cheek and neck, it almost feels like someone else. i get a glimmer of a thought, "one day, i wont have to beg to be taken care of. someone will do it because they want to.", but still, it hurts worse. i dont know how i can possibly derive so much gut wrenching pain from that little bit of hope, but i do. and still, i cant help myself, i cant blame anyone else. i can only hope someone will come save me. if i could handle this all on my own, i wouldnt be here typing this.

i want to decompose.

writing this after that monster of a textblock in the tags, but if you were wondering. im not exaggerating about the mess, and i wouldnt normally judge. because i have had worse bedrooms, mental illness is a bitch. but its in the common area, and she absolutely does make the 5yo live in it. she moved out to the living room after their room was too trashed for her to even walk in, so she toated her 50" fucking tv right out there and hasnt moved, accept to go to work, since. everyone pray or cross your fingers or send me some good energy to hope she gets sliced into a million pieces at work instead of accidentally oding on bennies so i can raise my brother with her life insurance money.

[agayconcept]

.

[hikeyzz]

this is the first day i haven't woken up in absolutely unbearable pain 🥹 one week post-op just one more to go and hopefully i'll be fully recovered <3

[mashmouths]

posted my stupid presentation assignment a cute 7.5 hours late to a class discussion so everyone can see that i posted it 7.5 hours late <3 but one of the people who was also meant to post today hasn't yet so i guess i feel a smidge less nauseous

[blackbutler-readerinsertsandjunk]

it's time for another selfie-bomb! ... well, selfie, and my favorites of the newest crystals I bought

first up a pic of my new shirt and scarf; the picture doesn't do the scarf justice, it is SO shimmery and changes colors based on how the light hits it! and the shirt makes me feel like a Reaper who's undercover as a sexy maid XD

as for the crystals... bismuth first! the flash on the camera makes it look gold and almost pyrite-y, but that's just the flash being dumb, it is DEFINITELY bismuth

next is a UV-reactive crystal called yooperlite! before and after the black light shining on it. :D the picture also does not quite do the black light reveal justice... it's SO vibrant and neon under the black light, it looks like a Halloween rave!!

and, of course... my absolute FAVORITE of my new ones. the big boi. the king. the high exalted granddaddy. MY SELENITE SNAKE!!! guys this thing is gorgeous. it's also carved in such a way that I could actually use it as a charging/clearing stand for other crystals by resting them among the snake's coils. UGH I'm gonna be showing this bad boy off for months!!

I also took some pics a few days ago to post here, of me being silly with my fake 'pet' snake, so... I'll post those some other time.

today I just needed a pick me up after the last several bleh weeks, and these crystals and stuff were IT! <3 <3 <3

[bean-chaointe]

During a break in the storm.

Santa Cruz, California (1/5/23)

[robinsnest2111]

maybe compression leggings would fix me 🤔

[marsmalade]

i did NOT know rook piercings were little bitches

[bladeofthestars]

i wish it didn't take so long to get literally anything done in the american health care system

[exopelagic]

i can’t believe i managed to get fucking mono and didn’t even get it by doing anything fun

[makismei]

with your head shoved into the pillow, your hand reaches back, lightly pushing at his stomach.

“mmph—give me a second, ohh—”

eyes rolling back into your head, you hand drops as he swings his hips harder, relentlessly prodding at that one spot in your cunt.

“kento!” you squeal, voice muffled and legs shaking, “i’m gonna cum again!”

he shushes you softly, a hand running down the curve of your ass. “i know baby, it’s okay.”

you shake your head, “‘m gonna die, ken—”

he laughs, watching your body shake in tandem with your orgasm. he’s holding your hips in place and he continues, pace never faltering. “you’re okay, sweet girl. just focus on feeling good.”

nanami leans down, kissing your temple. feeling his weight on you makes you drool, the warmth of his body addicting.

“more, please,” you slur, body flattening on the mattress. kento pulls out momentarily, pushing your legs together and sliding a pillow under your tummy before pushing back in.

“fuck!” you cry, hands pulling at his sheets, “fuck you!”

his weight presses you into the mattress. his teeth biting lightly at your ear. “one more baby, come on.”

“cumming ‘m cummin’, you—fuuuckk—”

“yeah,” he groans, feeling your cunt clench around him. he thinks he’s gonna lose his mind. sloppily kissing your cheek, his hand reaches up to grab your jaw, “you’re gonna make me cum sweet girl—where do you want it?”

“inside, please, i need it so bad.” you whine, turning your head to kiss him.

“you’re gonna kill me,” he mumbles, thrusting with a different fervour before dropping most of his weight on you, groaning in your ear.

“take it, baby, ‘s all yours.” you moan as you feel him filling you up, eyes almost crossing at the feeling.

nanami rolls off you momentarily, tucking your hair behind your ear and watching you catch your breath. he breathes out a chuckle, “so dramatic, you asked for this, remember?”

you try faking a frown but fail, your lips forming into a smirk instead. “what if i ask for it again?”

a hand playfully swats the swell of your ass, “you don’t know what you’re asking for, beautiful.”