#THANK YOU NEW FRIEND that's very kind
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☆2024 has been so difficult for me, and i want to end the year off on a high note by thanking everyone who’s been there for me through it.
☆thank you for talking to me. thank you for listening to me talk to you in return. thank you for staying on vc with me to play games or talk or draw or cry together. thank you for keeping my secrets. thank you for telling me yours. thank you for the gifts you’ve given me. thank you for the advice you’ve offered when i needed help. thank you for the silly messages you've sent me unprompted—it is so joyous to be remembered when i’m not around. thank you for making me feel safe. thank you for letting me stay by your side. thank you for staying by mine.
☆the passage of time is so scary to me, i think. once things are over you can never get them back—all you can do is move forward and hold the memories close to your heart. thank you for the memories you’ve given me, i will treasure them eternally. i am so happy that we get to keep moving forward together, from one year into the next.
☆to kia, diggs, casey, and everyone in sweaties gang; to wewa and rei; to lorel; to eliza and mitsu; to wiz and corbell; to alex, nash, geddon, and paperd; to worm and goldie; to candy and ashe; to haze, mono, benji, and chasm; to my partners (sasha, robin, and keith); to steel; to michael, and to collie;
i am so grateful i know you. i am so grateful we exist here, at the same time, together. thank you for everything. i love you, i love you, i love you.
@dreemurr-skelememer @digglesgiggles @megaloserrr @lollipopz-shop @popiplant @aoartmthebitxh @s3-izures @otterbup @kuvlarstuff @heartstitched @thiccsys @b0tanicalb00ba @popiplant @rushroulett3 @wewawoomp @dagwmeno @onlyplatonicirl @elizakai @swiftmitsu @wizb1z @calciumdreams @psycho-chair @nashdoesstuff @unknownarmageddon @canine-teethed-sheets @fishfrypi @candy-cryptid @narrators1and2 @hazerun3 @monolite001 @bonejello @chasmbreach @xyriscomplanata @livinganime14 @paddinglily @corvidmellow @lambradire-art @hackrusty
♡
#and to the rest of my tumblr followers & mutuals & friends; thank you. i appreciate you endlessly#thank you for the attention and support. thank you for being here. it means infinitely much to me.#through this difficult year art has been a huge help in getting me through to the other side;#i hope you have loved looking at mine as much as i loved making it.#thank you for sticking around in my corner of the internet to watch me flourish. i hope you stay a bit longer. ♡#and in case the very specific person i am thinking of is somehow reading this#i've been trying to figure out many things lately#one thing i am certain of now—even if i wasn't before—is that of all the wrong things going on in the world#ending an unconditionally loving friendship over a sans au ship you don't like is… silly. and chronically online.#but more importantly fickle. and cruel. i will not do that to these people; not for you. not for anyone else.#i will not judge the morals of those around me based off arbitrary (and in the long run meaningless) things we disagree on#but on the actions they take in the real world; the love and kindness i’ve always been shown unconditionally#not everyone is like the person who hurt me#the world is so full of light and love if you try to look for it#i wish you well too.#☆💬 / text#☆sunne friends#☆sunnesona#<- different from how i usually represent myself in my art but still me. perhaps even more so#alright enough chattering from me#good luck in the new year; i hope very much that we are all still here this time next year#thank you so much everyone. from the bottom of my heart.
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2024 Hungarian GP | x (edited)
#daniel ricciardo#autumn posts#the (edited) is quite unnecessary as it is most readily apparent lol but!!#I tried to rotate it 45 degrees ish and my lack of photo editing skills leaves much to be desired#anyways arm 😵💫❤️✨#I fear I'll be in a perpetual state of missing him#but I'll be savoring memories of him like light from a star still reaching earth years after its gone out 🌠#also that's overly dramatic hehe a new journey awaits!!! and I will be excited if he wants to share it with us!!!#until then I'll be blogging like its 2017 at times hehe#omg I was looking up top 2017 tracks and man there were some bangers that year 👏😎#okay nostalgia trip over I've been meaning to write but tbh I got myself all needlessly stressed!!#2025 is the year of not adding so much undue stress on myself - it's keeping me from flying!!!#also 2025 goals include drinking more water and less coffee 😒 sigh hehe#hope everyone has a very wonderful last day of the year!!!!#enjoying time with friends or fam or favorite hobbies ❤️#off to another chapter!! I hope good things are in store!!! 🎁🎉✨❤️#also if you read this far then hello and also my silliest yearning is Dan comes in to replace Liam in the summer#even tho RBR does Not deserve him and the stress of the sport with travel and media scrutiny are so much#retiring at 35? a dream!! but I do wonder what the vibe will be like after DTS drops#it feels like a proper goodbye had yet to come...idk#I'm still excited for Carlos and Max and Lewis and new faves too but#ahh I'm not saying anything that hasn't been said before#and he himself said he's done!!! so! c'est la vie#not goodbye but see ya later (in supercars or as a globetrotting dashing sponsor or just kickin it on the farm)#I'm at peace with all for the most part!!! but I'll be missing what could've been all the same#anyways I should go touch some grass! I'll be back soon!!#thank you everyone for all the kind tags my heart is like 💖💞💓💗💕!!!!#I appreciate this space and y'all so much ❤️❤️❤️ onto another year together!!#many more memories to make!!!
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also while we're here i would like to share the two iterations of tumblr user gorespawn that have existed since i abandoned this blog back in like early 2021. Who wants me
#i grew my hair out so i could twirl my hair while giggling about bald men#and also t.o.p of bigbang#and short men i see at the grocery store who honestly make me feel light-headed with raw and unbridled Want#but that's just a joke. i am. Lesbian#''no ur not'' I AM#anyway i used to be so ripped and hunky but now i am frail and sickly#what getting a job can do to a mf#thankfully i quit my job last week YIPPIIIEEEEEEE so now i will work towards becoming an absolute hunk again#wish me luck#ALSO#if anyone is obsessed with me and remembers all my lore i used to be transgender and i still am like lowkey on the down low#but in a new exciting way#anyway i used to be a gay man and then a stone butch dyke (as seen above) but now im practicing being a girl#it is very difficult but it is also fun. ive never been a girl before so it's a lot#anyway i bought two super cool sexy dresses yesterday for the first time ever in my life#sexy dresses meaning up to my neck and down to my feet and past my elbows. kind of like a wardrobe straight out of the handmaid's tale#from (to quote my friend) ''*The* old lady store'' thanks man. well i think theyre pretty and its v exciting bc ive never been a girl befor#anyway#who wants me#i still use the name emil online btw and i honestly always will i think it's just so me and also i do still answer to he/him dw#in a man way not in a he/him lesbian way#''he's LGBTQA+'' what. all at once?#yes.#i have mastered them all i have collected all the genders and all the sexualities and ive never been ''wrong''#it just keeps switching. which is fine. well im a girl now. in a detransitioning man way. who is insanely attracted to men#but you will have to tear this lesbian label out of my cold dead hands#''you can't call urself lesbian if u have sex w men'' well first of all fuck you and second of all i am celibate so you dont need to worry#''what the hell are you talking about'' nothing. now look how hot i am#im just joking around i hope that's fine w y'all
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happy birthday <3
Thank you so very much!! I'm having a great day thanks to my friends on Tumblr!! I'm sort of a hermit who hangs out with her dog. Ever since joining Tumblr, I've made new friends like you. I really enjoy sharing posts and talking to you and everyone else. You have made this a great birthday, and it's only 6 hours into it!! That's spectacular!! Have as great as day as I'm having, please. That'll make it a great day for me, too!! Thanks for the birthday wishes. I appreciate that very, very much!! 🎂 🥳 🎉 🎈 🎁 🎊
#it's my birthday#thank you my friend#it's a great birthday so far#I'm very happy#love#happiness#thank you#sharing#joy#new friends#pure joy#kindness#caring#I'm very lucky#smiling#i can't stop smiling#how cool is that#😁#spectacular#great people
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unfortunately i have the kind of autism that makes people have to explain things to me/i have to bounce my ideas around with people who know things before thoughts become anything for me
#when i did cape literature it was the first time i had actually read shakespeare in its like. original english dialect#and i would read the play on my own at home‚ not understand anything much less connect themes or anything#then go to school and sit in class while we read it and it would feel like i was reading it for the first time#much of my existing is masking like. pretending i know things i think i'm fr stupid at heart#<- i got away with a lot of this at school like i never spoke in patois i never wore braids my parents were still super helicopter-y#so i was generally unaware of like. school gossip or jamaican pop culture because at first i didn't have a phone and then later on#i straight up stopped caring about pretending to care about that stuff#i was pretty quiet but at the same time i had a lot of friends but didn't have a friend group etc etc#i Appeared like the perfect student so i got away w cheating on tests or not knowing stuff etc etc#especially towards the end of highschool when my depression got really bad and my overall average was in the 60s#very often i would submit assignments and tests thinking i got my point across perfectly or answered questions right according#to what i studied then id get the grades and commentary back and i fucking failed or something#so now whenever my profs or people in fandom r like you're so smart or you articulate your works very well i'm like What the fuck thank you#and it imprints in my brain forever because this is new to me#jamaican academia and jamaica in general is like so much about following roles than it is being a person#and when you're neglected and outcast and autistic it becomes impossible to be jamaican at all#and now people both here (jamaica) and in ghe us ask me shit like “wait you were born and puved in jamaica your whole life??”#it's. anyway#this post was originally about how i'm actually kind of stupid#*
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can you elaborate on gender with the twelfth doctor... im spinning she/her pronouns for twelve around in my head so much it gives me life. even if you dont feel like/dont have any further elaboration i want to thank you for introducing me to that concept
because she's a girl...? i don't understand the question she's just a girl
#i am being facetious; thank you very much for the kind ask!#real answer is that pronouns can be kind of an aesthetic choice#like a new outfit or haircut#and it's a choice i could see the doctor making#i think the doctor is always sort of apathetic about gender regardless of the body they're in#and will go by whatever pronouns people perceive them by because it saves time#and why waste time explaining their gender when they could be talking about the planets .#so calling themself a 'man' or a 'woman' is for the sake of not confusing their human companions who care more about that sort of thing#than they do rather than actually seeing themself that way#and i can also see them feeling a sort of joy if friends were to refer to them with pronouns that don't match their perceived gender#because it shows a deeper understanding of who they are#again i think this regardless of body; i think ten would happily respond to she/her pronouns or thirteen with he/him etc etc#but twelve sticks out to me so much a.) because she's my favorite#and b.) because i think she cares the least about what other people think of her#doctor who#delia.txt
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you guys won't believe this but y'all what a miracle..... God's grace always seems to come in floods when you least expect it. The boy problem is now resolved and at rest (well. somewhat.)
I somehow got around to talking to him yesterday about the disastrous conversation (the one where he went on at length about my age) and, God bless him, it was all ignorance rather than malice. He listened for a while, his face becoming more and more drawn and appalled as I explained how X thing came off, and at one point he just put his head on the table and was very, very upset because he hadn't thought about it from my perspective and hadn't realised the effects of his words. It was a surprisingly comfortable conversation (it is always easy to talk to him), and it was a relief to hear from his lips that he hadn't meant any of it in a hurtful way - he hadn't thought about how his words might sound at all.
#it was very sweet really and i am very glad that we are still friends. even better friends even because of this#he felt so badly that he actually wrote a long message apologizing again afterwards#anyway God bless him this is all very new to him!#and he's very conscientious and kind and thoughtful and i am glad that i was wrong about him meaning those things that way#it was a very sincere and honest conversation and i was grateful for it#God's grace abounds y'all a huge weight has been lifted off me and i am so so glad for it!!!#thank you for praying for me so much and for walking alongside me these past three months#it has not been agony the whole time! as i told him it was surprisingly joyful to fall in love with him. and i would go through it again#and i am glad that the end of this was not a careening dreadful painful agonizing end. praise God for that!!!!#the waiting room chapter
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When you split and gain a new fictive, and she's been great and really helpful. But you just know she's the type of character that the fandom just can't handle. Everyone wants complex and morally ambiguous or even outright evil characters and then go on a crusade the second there is even a hint of that actually happening. It sucks. I don't want to have to keep her in a boxed off safe space just to avoid walking into fandom drama. That's not fair to her, or to me. But it's whats happening because media literacy is dead and even liking villain characters apperently makes you a terrible person.
Also. Mod Party Cat. If this post is a bit too much, please feel free not to post it. I just, really need to get it out into the void either way. Thank you so much for your service running this place and I hope March treats you and yours well.
x
#fictionkinfessions#fictive#splitting cw#fandom issue#mod party cat#ur very kind anon thank you <3#much love to you and your new friend
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just wanna say im obsessed with your mind and i read your posts about kiryu like the morning paper. thank you for your service
(Sweats) e-even the ones about him laying eggs ?
#Thanks for the ask !#HIIIIII thank you for reading my posts im really a serial rambler so that is no easy feat. i just had a lowkey nightmare that was insect#based so its nice to think about different kinds of eggs once in a while. sorry for the eggs i just learned the word gravid and i cant stop#saying it !!! i literally opened tumblr to make another post about kiryu i was gonna say he was probably antisocial in his childhood which#is really a miracle any girls managed to notice him at all. and i believe that he was very dismissive of his clothing and appearance because#you know when youre young and trans and havent realised it but you just randomly hate everything about your appearance and dont even knowwhy#i think his hair was always too long and too shaggy and he would let nishiki comb it sometimes because he really could not stand his mane#and sometimes when it gets wayy too long and shitty the sunflower caretaker would drag him outside and just cut a chunk of it off with a#knife and kiryu would have shoulder length hair for a little while... anyway i need to give him a little girlfriend like how rikiya had one#when he was in school because all trans guys need a little girlfriend or an all girl group of friends to be his girlfriends when hes a kid#so he can carry their shopping bags and wait for them outside the changing room etc and kiryu cant resist a girl so he gets a letter from#nishiki and he tells him yeah this is probably a prank to have you wait there for hours or there might be guys waiting to ambush you and#beat the crap out of you. and kiryus like Nobody beats the crap out of me except our dad. and goes to meet this girl and he actually agrees#to go out with her and this is the thing that keeps him in school because otherwise he would literally not go. like hed walk with yumi and#nishiki and the rest of the kids at sunflower that he doesnt care about to remember the names of. and he would just wave them off at the#gate and wander the town in his school uniform and then after school he’ll meet nishiki and possibly yumi at the gate (yumi probably makes#other friends but its a Must to walk nishiki home because he’ll get lonely) and when kiryu starts going out with this girl hes obligated to#walk her home so he already broke rule one but nishikis like happy for him But he has to walk home with some other random guys now and#eventually theyll broach the topic of ‘his psycho sister’ and nishiki literally has to beat a few guys up to defend kiryus honour and when#he comes back with news of how unpopular kiryu is with the rest of the guys because he looks better with short hair than they do and has a#girlfriend whos super cute. kiryu is just like damn did you commit social suicide to protect my honour? youre my best friend. but whatever#kids get over it fast. but parents dont!! and kiryu walks his girlfriend right to her front door and soon enough her parents are going to#find out that the boyfriend she keeps gushing about is a girl and straight up take her out of school to make her stop being gay and kiryus#like but ... im a boy ... punches the ground and screams to the sky. anyway enough about dysphoria simulator im here to talk about this guy#when hes a bit older because im salivating and shaking over the thought of his bootyass rip kiryu you woulda loved thongs. i think hed hate#ripped jeans but only because he thinks theyre a waste of manufacturing. its literally better for the world that kiryu decided 2 transition#because can you imagine if she was a girl and needed to wear a bra? like she would literally have an itchy back all the time which would#give her a hair trigger temper which means kamurocho a&e room will be very healthily plush indeed. god my battery is dying i need to take a#shower noww anyway really thank you for the nice message you are so sweet ... hi ...
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✨💥
Fanfic Writer Ask Game
✨️ Out of the comments you’ve received on your fics, what are two or three of your favorites?
💀 i am so bad at remembering comments... i truly do appreciate every single one i get, but i'm very bad at remembering the specifics. i don't have a dedicated favourites list, and the only comment i can remember right now is the one i shared last time :')
so instead of struggling through searching all my comments, how about i share with you a (now deleted) bookmark that is permanently ingrained in my mind? this was left on "A Beginner's Guide To Breaking Your (Apparently Requited) Crush Out Of A Time Loop", and i. still lose my shit in the best way whenever i read it.
@ the bookmarker, i hope you're doing well (genuinely. this is one of my favourite bookmark/comment ever. i'm actually weirdly happy i touched them this deeply in this way, esp since i was tipsy while writing the fic)
💥 What is one canon thing that you wish you could change?
i am weirdly enough not so anal about canon that i think about changing it frequently. maybe it's because i'm so used to the freedom of just closing your eyes to canon and doing whatever the hell you want in au city.
that being said. (puts on warrior cats hat) i genuinely wish the new prophecies group, the remaining five of them, didn't split off and completely cut ties the way they did after they all arrived at the new lake territory. i think the new prophecy arc is best because it's this ragtag group of chosen warriors, travelling together, bonding together in spite of the clan lines dividing them. and then you're going to just. have them separate again? "it's the clan way" well MAYBE the clan way should change, and they should differ on the way they run things! yes, yes, clans should handle themselves, etc, it's the warrior way, but also. maybe a little bit more friendship? relaxed borders? MAYBE??? i miss my kids :(
#ask box#olivebranch311#thank you olive!!#disclaimer i dropped off from warriors midway through dawn of the clans (just kind of forgot to keep reading)#and i have not yet revisited beyond the new prophecy#which is still (and forever will be) my favourite arc#so like idk the current state of canon except theres like cat possession amogus now ???#and skyclan is back?? huh#i miss crowfeather :( hes still in canon i think i just miss my boy#also i should put a disclaimer i don't have strong opinions on kinning#i have old friends who do it and that's neat! very cool (genuine)#like theyre living their best lives#i just. ig the thing abt the bookmark comment was how gobsmacked i was#that someone read the thing i wrote while kinda drunk#and went oh my god. wait. this happened to me#i felt like a PROPHET. i felt POWERFUL.
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I am so so happy that the Dear Evan Hansen movie was laughably bad. I hated that show so fucking much, and the world would absolutely be a worse place if that movie was successful and inspired even MORE productions of the stage show. I mean I would have been seeing FAN ART of the movie if it had been competently made, and thank FUCK that didn't happen.
Here's the Jenny Nicholson review that I am currently watching for a second time, if you wanna see the one good thing to come from this horrible musical:
youtube
#original#dear evan hansen#dear evan hansen movie#Jenny Nicholson#i remember being 23 and suicidal and hearing the big hopeful song from that musical and being like...#is this? song about suicide prevention SUPPOSED to make me want to do it more?????#and while a friend tried to argue that it was intentionally made hollow i later found out that this was not the case#the musical is very earnest about its suicide prevention messaging in the song i had heard and it is NOT supposed to make folks crave death#who knew!!!#ME. I DID. I CALLED IT.#I KNEW.#Youtube#like can you IMAGINE a world where Evan was played by some teenage heart throb !#and if it had baseline competent direction??#all the depressed teen girls who would suddenly be vehemently and emotionally defending the film from any kind of criticism#and lashing out viciously at people on Twitter for pointing out how shitty and harmful the narrative is???#and all the HIGH SCHOOL PRODUCTIONS that would have happened and GENUINELY GIVEN KIDS THIS HORRIBLE HARMFUL SHIT directly!!!!!#thANK you ben platt for playing this role in this movie#and thank you whoever cut together this ghoulish little film#terrible job everyone but good news is that dear evan hansen is a terrible thing so you've done a net good.#bad art can sometimes save lives. [by mitigating some of the harm that it was and is already doing. but still.]#also if this story was a good thing in someone's life that is fine good for them but nothing will convince me that this show is a good thing
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hi! sorry about your work week, i had a bad week myself but hopefully it gets better for us! so anyway, sorry if youve been asked this so much but i was wondering if you do art anymore? I was an avid fan 2011-2015 and was obsessed with your speedpaints and i understand you stopped posting because art theft was RAMPANT back then on DA/FA. But then i kinda fell off the grid for a bit. Your yearly art dumps were, no joke, smth i looked forward to all year back then. Thanks for your time either way!
first week of april grumpy buddies 🤝 the art theft was definitely part of the reason i stopped posting but tbh mostly i just got really burnt out after i graduated college and then for a long while my mental health was mmmmm not great. i do art very, very seldom at this point, but it's actually something that the last few weeks i've really started to find myself wanting to pick back up again. plus last year i accidentally bricked my laptop that had my art programs on it, so i'm in the process of getting a new one once my tax return comes in. i'd really like to get back into making art, even if it's just a few finished pieces a year that'd still be more than what i'm doing now. i miss my art dumps too ;_; i was just looking through them recently and wondering if i had enough stuff from the past several years to cobble one more together. i'm glad someone else also remembers them fondly, that makes me very happy. i hope i have some new stuff to show to you soon!
#its like. definitely discouraging bc a lot of my art friends from back in the day are still very active#and have improved so much and are making wonderful art#and i feel ashamed of how much ive now fallen behind and havent improved in ~10 years#but in a way its also kind of motivating? like i GOTTA get back into it. i feel ready to again#and hopefully once i get my new laptop and get set up i can actually start the process of de-rusting that part of my brain#anyway whenever i get a message from someone who used to follow me on DA/FA i get very 🥺 bc thats so touching#so thank you for the motivation!
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Does it feel like life is permanently set to extreme hard mode and I still feel super crappy greater than 90% of the time? Yup. But! Emboldened by our relative success with last year's tomatoes, we have given it another go and have added a little pepper plant friend for them. :)
(It may look like the peppers aren't doing as well as the tomatoes, but it cannot be overstated just how bananas this plant's growth chart has been; it's determined to escape the confines of its basket-cage; it has to be constantly rotated so it doesn't completely lose the battle with gravity; I only took this picture the other day and it already looks SO outdated. Can't stop, WON'T STOP.)
#anyways the plan for today is to make some good headway on my 'correspondence' so I guess we'll see how that goes *sheepish laughter*#don't worry I'm not guilting myself over my ridiculously sporadic ability to socially engage -#(not much anyhow I swear!)#- it's just you guys have no idea how much I've MISSED y'all! how I've YEARNED to be able to geek out with you'uns over the blorbos and#their fictional worlds. Like. Please picture me gazing longingly into the middle distance while sorrowfully belting:#🎶 I wanna beeee where the (tumblr) people are. I wanna see... wanna see 'em meta-iiiing! 🎶#🎶 frolicking around in their - what're they called again? - oh right! plot bunnies! 🎶#🎶 incrementally crawling your way through your backlog of content to consume and unexpectedly stumbling your way#into a few new hyper-fixations while the already-there ones continue to rage on you don't get too far... 🎶#🎶 posts (and reblogs and messages and actually finishing a few of your fan creation projects and...) are required for jumping (into#fandoms); dancing (with your friends in gleeful delight over your shared headcanons)! 🎶#🎶 [...] up where they talk (to each other at normal intervals)! up where they (don't) run (out of energy so fast)! 🎶#🎶 up where they stay all day IN THE SUNNNNNNNNN 🎶#🎶 wandering free. wish I could be. PART OF THAT WOOOORLD 🎶#I could go on but I think you get the gist of it 😆#and I definitely know I'm not along in this feeling; at the very least I'm sure that is a familiar tune#in many contexts for anyone else struggling with chronic fatigue/illness among other things#I just wish I could find a better way to intermingle extending kindness and patience to myself and rolling around in fictional character#feelings /together/ with my friends without having to insert such long gaps in between you know?#okay woebegone rambling aside thanks guys for not forgetting about me while I've been gone <3#and let me assure you I haven't forgotten you all either 'cause boy do I need to SHARE SOME STUFF with you!#random musings of a personal nature#I JUST WANNA BE THRIVING HALF AS GOOD AS THOSE TOMATOES YA FEEL ME?
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hiii! 'tis me.
#i have returned from death (school). limbo‚ even.#i shall not describe it as hell thanks to my lovely Friend (trademark) whom lights up the entire room for me#despite probably darkening it for everyone else due to her apathetic and uncaring nature. oh she's perfect#ahem. not the point. and also very boring to the rest of you who do not know nor care about her#well! the day went fairly great. she (the Friend) seemed to really enjoy my gift and got embarrassed by it‚ which was my intention#she read through the notebook i prepared for her over the summer as a sort of diary directed at her and she really laughed at some parts#she seemed to like the keychain‚ i hope to see her use it#she also really liked the matching-with-mine astronaut that is both an eraser and a pencil sharpener and is already using it#and she ate the two chocolate bars (her favorites) i added into the box as extras.#she was also pretty impressed when i pointed out design choices i made for the inside of the box#so all in all. great day‚ amazing day‚ nearly perfect dare i say. god why does it rhyme. i hate it here#ahem anyway!#we also have new teachers that took the place of the old ones. of course many remain unchanged‚ but it didn't go without any new faces#notably‚ we have a new qur'an teacher‚ a new math teacher and a new literature teacher.#some other teachers were also changed but i have not met them yet so i do not know which#i am especially conflicted with the new literature teacher -#on one hand‚ he's great! very funny‚ very considerate‚ and quite a good teacher from what i've seen.#on the other hand i will also quite miss the old literature teacher.#she was nice! i hope i get to see her around the school#anywwy‚ i will also be missing the old qur'an teacher a lot. she was my favorite‚ and she is very kind-hearted#im fine with the math teacher i suppose. i liked the old one‚ and the new one seems a bit... extra? but i don't feel too strongly on it.#i heard the english teacher we had was replaced and the one we had left the school‚ so that's sad. i really liked her.#🌙rambling
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merry crisis
did you know i’m kissing you on your mouth in right here and now. did you know that. SMOOCH. 😘 💋
#MERRY CHRISTMAS MY DEARLY BELOVED FRIEND#you’re always my favorite person and you have once again done me a kindness by bringing one of my silly kids to life#thanks for picking my favorite one because i want her to take care of me#i love this very much 💜#i look forward to giving you your new years gift#c: maura foster
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Latest news in being a person with anxiety is wanting the same thing as someone else but being anxious about why they want it
#ven.txt#I’m just the hrggggggger yknow#snyway my beloved girlies who like hearing other people’s problems. this is for u#I’m like. idfk. romantically involved with a person in my friend group#and ostensibly there are no issues and in fact are quite a lot of. opposite of issues. very poggers#so we call each other cute pet names and one time he’s like. but I can’t call you that in group call#which yeah. that tells our friends that something is going on; which I also would feel weird about because it adds outside expectations#as well as the pressure to define a relationship in more specific terms and I just don’t know who that benefits#but I get anxious because like. well I know my thoughts but what are his motivations for not wanting to tell them?#any story you read online where a man wants to hide a relationship turns out terribly; but this is not really on that level.#like this is not a 3 year relationship being hidden from someone’s parents when they’re otherwise close like there are some key differences#but where my brain immediately jumps is. person is hiding something person is ashamed of me or embarrassed of me#and do I think any of those are reasonable? not really at all; no. do they appear anyway? yes#and like. you don’t tell people about stuff that’s New generally and also. as I’ve said. I also do not think there would be benefits#to saying anything!!!!!! especially when I would not be terribly comfortable being affectionate in front of other people like#there’s nothing to gain!!!!!!!!!!#anyway. the solution to this is obviously to talk about it with him and either I will or he’ll see this post in which case. hi :>#but I wanted to complain and vent before actually doing that#thanks for coming to my Ted talk everyone. yeah it was kind of a weird one I know
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