#Silence Montane

[cosmerelists]

If Cosmere Characters worked at a coffee shop...

[Spoilers for Rhythm of War & Mistborn Era 1, technically! All other references should be safe.]

Let’s say the Cosmere characters lived in our world and worked as baristas. What would they be like in that role?

1. Kaladin: Keeps trying (in vain) to unionize with the other employees

Kaladin: I really thought we had it, that time.

Kaladin: I can’t believe I’m the only one who didn’t get fired.

Kaladin: AGAIN

2. Shallan: Makes the most gorgeous latte art you’ve ever seen

Customer: H-How did you make the flower 3D? It’s just MILK

Shallan: I learned it from a book!

3. Sarene: Is the queen of malicious compliance and working to rule

Sarene: Manager got on my case because the customer said the coffee was weak.

Sarene: I am using this scale to measure out the proper coffee amounts to the gram.

Sarene: These tweezers help. 

4. Kelsier: The rumors of his firing were greatly exaggerated

Doug the normal barista: Uh, I’m pretty sure our new coworker Ty Decker is just Kelsier in a mustache.

Doug the other normal barista: Impossible! We saw him get fired!

Doug #1: I’m telling you, man! It’s like he can’t leave this coffeeshop!

“Ty” (to a customer): Hello would you like to join my secret club?

Doug #2 (whispering): And I’m pretty sure he’s in an MLM!

5. Adolin: Knows each customer by name (and flirts for tips)

Adolin: Janala! It’s so great to see you! You look gorgeous as always!

Janala: ...

Janala: Is our date going to be just hanging out at your coffeeshop while you’re working?

Adolin: I-It’ll be fun; you’ll see!

6. Lirin: Refuses to apply upcharges

Lirin: No one should have to pay EXTRA for oatmilk!

Lirin: I’m just going to give this to you for free.

7. Steris: Has the employee handbook memorized

Steris: Actually, it’s illegal to ask Doug to start the coffee before he clocks in.

Steris: Employee handbook Section 3.7a.

8. Lightsong: Refuses to believe that he is a god (of coffeemaking)

Lightsong: Ugh, WHY are we always so much busier when I’m working?

Lightsong: I’m not even that good at making coffee!

Llarimar: People believe your coffee is the best in town.

Lightsong: The coffee maker does all the work!

9. Lezian: Keeps forming grudges against coworkers

Lezian: Every time someone else gets chosen for Employee of the Month instead of me...

Lezian: I make it my mission to see them FIRED before the month is OVER!

Kaladin: But that’s...always.

Kaladin: You’re not very good at your job.

Lezian: THAT’S IT

Lezian: YOU’RE ON MY LIST

10. Tress: Really just loves the cups

Tress: Oh! I love your travel mug!

Tress: Where is it from?

11. Vivenna: Gradually has all of her coffeeshop illusions shattered

Vivenna: Man, I really thought people would come in, order off the menu, and then wait politely for their drink to be made and delivered.

Customer: NINE SHOTS OF ESPRESSO! WHIPPED CREAM!

Vivenna: I have seen the darkest parts of humanity.

12. Hoid: Is somehow everyone’s previous coworker

Shallan: Wait, didn’t we work for UberEats together? 

Kelsier: No, that’s the bastard who slapped me! In the middle of Walmart! While we were on the clock!

Kaladin: Huh? I think that’s the guy who always changed the radio station in the store I used to work at.

Steris: I think he did Lyft with my sister.

Vivenna: Are you sure? I thought he worked at a bookstore with MY sister.

Sarene: I think I recognize him from my last office job. He never really seemed to do anything.

Adolin: How old IS this guy??

13. Rock: Makes the coffee...very strong

Rock: This is how we drink it where I’m from!

Customer: M-My tongue is dissolving!

14. Jasnah: Doesn’t like coffee

Shallan: You don’t like coffee??

Jasnah: I do not.

Shallan: You work in a coffee shop!

Jasnah: I don’t try to convince others to dislike coffee. 

Jasnah: But I do believe that it is an unnecessary contrivance that people depend too much on.

Shallan: I thought you pulled, like, constant all-nighters!

Jasnah: That’s just sheer willpower. 

15. Silence: Takes safety rules very seriously

Silence: Hey!

Silence: Wash out that cut, put on a band-aid, and wear gloves! You can’t bleed around food!

Silence: T-turn off that stove! You shouldn’t leave an open flame if you’re not heating something up!

Silence: AND NO RUNNING!

[starling-illu]

cosmere inktober 17: forest

[obscuremilfoff]

[stardustravens]

Today’s entry for my fandom crossover bullshit:

Gertrude Robinson and Silence Montane

[supreme-leader-stoat]

Every now and then when I see someone trying to argue that Brandon Sanderson is this like, brazenly sexist Fridgewives Georg because of the times female characters die in his books, I get an itch to turn it around on them and argue that he actually really hates people's brothers, because I can think of a whole list of those that he's killed off. Just off the top of my head:

Vin lost Reen

Kelsier and Marsh is just a big two-way loss-fest

Honestly I don't think Zane really counts but he is in there technically

Llarimar lost Stenimar. Twice.

Kaladin lost Tien, natch

Shallan lost Heleran

Dalinar lost Gavilar

Jasnah lost Elhokar

[incorrectsanderversequotes]

Shallan: What's the scariest horror movie you've ever watched? Adolin: IT. Val: Annabelle. William Ann: Paranormal Activity. Kaladin: High School Musical. All throughout high school I was scared that everyone was gonna randomly get up and start singing and dancing, and I would be the only one who doesn't know the words.

[sgiandubh]

Anon rebelde.

Como siempre después de la tormenta en el vaso de agua del fandom llega la calma chicha.¿Tanta rasgadura de vestiduras por una supuesta campista que podía o no haber coincidido con Sam y muchos más campistas y ahora grillos? Montan el espectáculo y cuando tienen al público congregado, salen por la puerta de atrás. Si eso no es una estrategia para intentar mantener con vida unos blogs que agonizan a partes iguales por la incompetencia de sus responsables, prometiendo pero no dando y saturando de negatividad cualquier gesto o movimiento de Sam que me diga alguien que es porque lo que no es normal, a estas alturas de la película, es que la gente siga cayendo en el engaño barato de YO SE cuando lo único que saben es que su caída está anunciada. Y cuidado con agosto, suele ser mes problemático 🤣

Dear (returning) Anon Rebelde,

Y como siempre, un placer leerte. Sobre todo cuando consigues resumir de forma tan eficaz toda la locura del verano. Pero, como siempre, traducción primero:

'As always, the storm in the teacup of the fandom is followed by dead silence. So much fuss over a supposed camper who might or might not have coincided with Sam (and many more campers) and now - crickets? They put on the show and when the audience finally gathers, they leave through the back door. If that is not a strategy to try and keep alive some blogs that are dying, mainly because of their managers' incompetence, promising but not giving and saturating any gesture or movement of Sam with negativity, then I don't know what it is. Because what is not normal, at this stage, is that people continue to fall for the cheap deception of I KNOW when the only thing they know is that their downfall is announced. And watch out for August, it is usually a problematic month 🤣'

Snake oil sellers never say simple, common sense things like: ' I was wrong' or 'this post has been edited for accuracy' and, in the process, take no responsibility. Context is always scarce, which means zero arguments and (in some extreme cases) zero fucks are actively being given about plausibility.

I always found the most important (and difficult) side of my job as a diplomat was building trust and credibility, both with our counterparts of the host country and our ex-pat community. You can only achieve that if you consistently deliver exactly what you promised and do it at the right moment in time. Reputation is a bitch: it takes years to build and can be ruined in a fraction of a second.

I see no reason why I should suddenly start to be someone else, in here.

If other bloggers have different standards, that is not my problem. That being said, I found this comment absolutely sickening:

Finally a Freudian slip, acknowledging what we knew all along. To some, S is just a piece of meat. Nothing more.

I have no words.

[columbidae-creature]

mayhaps a mountain lion poem? I love poetry and making g poetry so i love seeing others doing it :333

here you go! this will be my last one for today cause I gotta write a paper but I'll get to the other requests soon enough! I'm very connected to cougars cause we have a lot where I live!

Cougar

Many named beast roams in montane solitude I shift between the trees There is the line of my tail, There is the line of horizon– It follows through me.

To be made for this, A dust-brown body weaving night-time forests I know the secret ways– I know the stars.

I’ll fold them up into my pelt, And never drop them, Too dexterous on the rock-sides to ever flinch. You would almost think I had stars in my eyes With how they glow

On roadside remote patrol I am singularity to deer– Unseen, I dress myself in the silence Of a moss-draped forest.

I rest my head upon the cold floor Of a sheltering cave, And sway to forest music Only cat ears can know.

[everrainrp]

I know their apps are a ways away but can you talk about mistshroud lore and beliefs please?

Hello!

Elevated up where the clouds reach down to touch the evergreens and where the air begins to thin, Mistshroud Clan resides in eerie silence and mystery. Founded by Shroudedcrawl in tandem with Russetthorn and Thornrush, Mistshroud Clan was the third Clan to be founded among the five. Shroudedcrawl sought a quiet place, one that would conceal their groups very presence from outside threats, a place where their kin would no longer be threatened and exploited. The place that was settled on is a montane cloud forest, constantly enshrouded in mists and fog, with deep ravines and rocky outcroppings as the territory ascends upwards. The overgrown stone quarry was the perfect place to seek the peace that was wanted, and was quickly established as the camp that has remained to the current day.

The cats of Mistshroud are a secretive and elusive bunch, scarcely having interactions with other Clans sans Thornrush, with whom they have a shared history. They have developed and perfected the art of living in constant concealment by using the mists as concealment and knowing their territory by the back of their paws. Their boundaries are watched closely, a sharp eye always kept on them to ensure no trespassers infringe on their safe haven. This careful watching is also in part due to the territory itself: the cats of Mistshroud know how to live and thrive in their own environment - other Clans do not. And a cat that falls down a ravine and becomes injured becomes Mistshroud's problem. Something they would like to avoid to begin with.

Naturally, their primary belief system is formed from within the mists themselves, being called 'The Veil'. Spirits reside within the mists of their home, guiding or misleading cats depending on the spirits temperament. There is a high level of spiritual phenomena that occur within their boundaries, whether it was always inherent to it or brought by the Clan is unknown. When a cat within the Clan passes, their spirit is said to join others beyond The Veil. In tandem with The Veil, the lack of visibility led to an interesting pantheon to be formed: The Cardinal Directions. These deities are responsible for guiding Mistshroud when any particular cat feels lost, physically or mentally, with each deity representing North, West, South, and East and each direction representing something different.

Overall, little is known about how much Mistshroud... Well, knows, about the other Clans. There always appears to be tabs kept on them during Gatherings and Festivals: just how close are they watching?

[dastardly-lemondrops]

Recently a trans woman and Montana state representative, Zooey Zephyr, has been silenced for trying to speak in defence of trans rights and trans youth. Those protesting her treatment have been arresting, so I'm sharing their bail fund. Maybe many people don't know much about Montana. It's not a very populous state. In a lot of ways, it's a holdout of progressive policies surrounded by states which are very much not, and all of that is being threatened now. It's one of the last states to not be right to work, the state constitution defends right to privacy (which contributes to abotion rights), and it's been a state with relatively easy to access care for trans people. And now all of that is under threat. I understand if people didn't know this because most people don't know much about Montana, but for those reasons, it's very scary and frustrating to see this kind of thing happening here. Fortunately, there are people fighting against all of that, so I ask that if you can support them and watch as this all unfolds, please do. Thank you.

[gal-palanaeum]

[ID: Cosmere sexywoman bracket, with five rounds as follows, two rounds per paragraph: Blushweaver vs Palona: Blushweaver won Jasnah vs Venli: Jasnah won Then Blushweaver vs Jasnah: Jasnah won

Shallan vs Vivenna: Vivenna won Navani vs [unreadable, I'm not sure]: Navani won Then Vivenna vs Navani: Navani won

Vin vs Laral: Vin won Sisirinah vs Marasi: Marasi won Then Vin vs Marasi: Vin won

MeLaan vs Lessie: MeLaan won Steris vs Evi: Steris won Then MeLaan vs Steris: MeLaan won

Sarene vs Allrianne: Sarene won Shan vs Cultivation: Cultivation won Then Sarene vs Cultivation: Sarene won

Raboniel vs Leshwi: Raboniel won Rysn vs Shai: Rysn won Then Raboniel vs Rysn: Raboniel won

Cord vs Silence Montane: Silence Montane won Hesina vs Aesudan: Hesina won Then Silence Montane vs Hesina: Hesina won

Edgli vs Shalash: Shalash won Eshonai vs Khriss: Khriss won Then Shalash vs Khriss: Khriss won

Eight contestants of winners started the next round:

Jasnah vs Navani: Jasnah won Vin vs MeLaan: MeLaan won Then Jasnah vs MeLaan: Jasnah won

Sarene vs Raboniel: Raboniel won Hesina vs Khriss: Khriss won Then Raboniel vs Khriss: Raboniel won

The final round was Jasnah vs Raboniel. A bordered area reads, "Champion: Jasnah!" End ID.]

Reflecting back on the Cosmere Sexywoman bracket, what did you find surprising? What characters do you think got knocked out too soon? Did the sexywoman you were rooting for win in the end?

Jeez wow that’s a look back. Honestly I thought it was going to be between either Jasnah and MeLann or Jasnah and one of the returned.

I think we were all sleeping on Shalash however, she deserved to go higher.

[obscuremilfoff]

[just-cosmere-fan]

Siri: who would want to hurt their own God?

[shouldprobablybereading]

Five minutes to midnight so I’m kinda late to it, but happy mothers day to the only surviving mothers in the cosmere.

May you not get killed by your husbands for another year