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richincolor · 6 months

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Title: The Last Bloodcarver Author: Vanessa Le Genres: Fantasy, Science Fiction, Mystery Pages: 384 Publisher: Roaring Brook Press Review Copy: eARC provided via NetGalley Availability: Available now

Summary: Nhika is a bloodcarver. A coldhearted, ruthless being who can alter human biology with just a touch.

In the industrial city of Theumas, Nhika is seen not as a healer, but a monster that kills for pleasure. And in the city's criminal underbelly, the rarest of monsters are traded for gold. When Nhika is finally caught by the infamous Butchers, she's forced to heal the last witness to a high-profile murder.

As Nhika delves into the investigation, all signs point to Ven Kochin, an alluring yet entitled physician's aide. Despite his relentless attempts to push her out of his opulent world, something inexplicable draws Nhika to him. But when she discovers Kochin is not who he claims to be, Nhika will be faced with a greater, more terrifying evil lurking in the city's center...

Her only chance to survive lies in a terrible choice—become the dreaded monster the city fears, or risk jeopardizing the future of her kind.

Review: [The Last Bloodcarver includes a significant amount of body horror, from interacting with corpses to repeated references to medical experimentation by a colonial power. The book also includes animal death and extended scenes of characters seriously injured (stab/gunshot wounds).]

I absolutely adored Vanessa Le’s The Last Bloodcarver. Le’s debut novel is set in a complicated Vietnam-inspired fantasy (and science fiction) world, one where war has forced Nhika’s family out of Yarong and into the neutral city-state of Theumas. Even though Nhika has escaped into (currently) neutral territory, Daltanny’s occupation of Yarong still affects Nhika, from the proliferation of the term “bloodcarver” instead of “heartsooth” to the loss of cultural knowledge regarding heartsoothing after Nhika’s grandmother’s death.

That cultural disconnect and the loss of knowledge is something that haunts Nhika throughout the novel. She is keenly aware of her much she doesn’t know and has complicated feelings about how she uses her heartsoothing to survive when the previous generations could do it openly and were honored for it. Theumas might be better for Nhika than Yarong under Daltanny’s occupation, since she isn’t automatically slated for horrific medical “experiments”, but Theumas has its own problems. When the Butchers capture and arrange to sell Nhika, the prospective buyers range from people who think if they consume her heart, they will be cured of whatever ails them, to people who clearly want to use her as an assassin. Even when she is purchased by the Congmi family to try to heal a family friend (and promised freedom and payment even if she can’t help him), fear, suspicion, and hostility are close at hand.

So it’s wonderful whenever Nhika is able to make small connections to what she has lost. (There is a scene where she acquires some Yarongese items and is overwhelmed by what they represent that is just lovely.) Whenever Nhika made the choice to heal and to help, I was delighted by her determination to honor what her grandmother taught her. I appreciated the contrast Kochin represented to Nhika’s experience and the places where the two of them were aligned. Kochin was a character that I didn’t warm up to until after his reveal, but I think his character arc complemented Nhika’s very well.

The mystery of who killed Quan and seriously injured Hendon isn’t a complex one, but unraveling the mystery is far less important than Nhika learning why it happened. Once we have that information, the rest of the book falls into place beautifully. Le’s plotting and development of themes really shined in the second half and propelled the novel to an incredible final act that made me fervently hope there would be a sequel. (And there will be!)

Recommendation: Get it now, so long as you aren’t put off by body horror, medical experimentation, and some gore. Vanessa Le created a fascinating fantasy/sci-fi world in The Last Bloodcarver, and the impacts of war and colonialism on Nhika and her people are explored in interesting ways while a murder mystery unfolds in the foreground. Le’s medical-based magic system is fascinating, and Nhika’s character journey is compelling. I’m looking forward to the conclusion of this duology next year.

Extras: Author Chat w/ Vanessa Le | Books and Boba

Q&A: Vanessa Le, Author of ‘The Last Bloodcarver’

#the last bloodcarver #book reviews #vanessa le #fantasy #science fiction #mystery

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venticuliao · 1 year

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sumeru, capitalism and cultural hegemony

The first thing we learn about Sumeru is that knowledge is handled as a resource, that is to say, it serves both as social and economic capital that grants people different status. The more academic merit a person obtains, the more power and opportunities they’re handed.

The nation is ruled not by mora, but by knowledge. The equivalent to our capital irl (wealth) in Sumeru is knowledge or academic merit.

To put it simply, it works as an allegory for capitalism.

The sages, as the political class, hoard this capital from the lower and marginalized communities (working class and desert people) and distribute it unfairly through the Akasha system: Access to knowledge is restricted by each person’s academic merit, and those outside Akademiya are not granted further education than what their labor limits.

As such, the conventional idea of personal relationships within the Akademiya is transactional in nature, it’s based on creating bonds with the goal of producing academic (and therefore economic) value. These bonds are traditionally formed when the people involved share the same objectives and are able to cooperate in research, since that’s what their professional pursuits and livelihood depend on.

In the idealized perspective of academics and Akademiya culture, relationships only have justified purpose for the collective society if they produce academic (therefore economic) value. Not unlike the way capitalist society pushes the roles of traditional family, heterosexual and focused on parenthood, with the purpose of generating inheritance that will maintain and renew its system. (give it up for 4ggravate as local allegory for homosexuality on top of the regular yaoi)

Nilou's story quest, for instance, features a daughter alienated from her father who seeks to escape the burden of the Akademiya’s traditional concept of family. Her father, Sharif, pushes her for higher academic performance despite her attempts to please him and the ways in which she's tried to establish a bond through other alternative means. The purpose of having a daughter, of family, is entirely practical in this sense: it seeks to produce academic merit.

An allegory works as a symbol of sorts, it's not a 1:1 comparison you can make with the actual system, so let's not get caught up in meaningless details such as "Acshually, Sumeru is a noocracy" and the likes. It represents aspects it wants to address through symbols.

For example, the sages quite literally steal the citizen’s dreams —the personal experience and knowledge stored in their subconscious— to create an artificial god, the unlimited source of knowledge they wanted to replace their archon with.

This god is a projection of themselves in divine form, made not only of the capital of the nation that they control, but also of the forceful cooperation of the middle and working classes: an allegory for exploited labor that enriches the political class.

The experience and technical expertise of workers outside Akademiya is something that can only be acquired through labor, not from theory or the Akasha itself. The sages wouldn't have bothered taking dreams from them if such knowledge was worthless.

We know it is not a highly valued resource, however, since these workers in the public boards are struggling to get by:

Kaveh, bless his heart, tries to help them from his ideals of altruism, but while Alhaitham's disinterest in interfering with the status quo is reproachable, he is not wrong to call his attempt meaningless: there are more people in the same situation as these workers, and after they complete the job Kaveh gave up for them, they will still be in the same situation.

Change cannot be achieved with small, individual gestures of kindness; it's the (let's talk in tree terms) root cause of the issues that needs to be attacked.

(Let's cut feeble scholar some slack though, he's the one who achieved precisely this by overthrowing Azar and the political class, after all, the ones who upheld this system)

Nahida makes a distinction in how Alhaitham and Kaveh view society: she says Kaveh has an almost perfect grasp on what it means to be a nation of wisdom, and chastises Alhaitham for looking down on the "mediocre majority".

Kaveh’s altruism is genuine, if a little influenced by his compulsive guilt due to believing that he caused his own family’s demise. He grieves the losses he’s suffered and the loneliness left behind to such a degree that he can’t ignore those in need around him. He aims to help others in order to avoid guilt, yet he himself feels burdened by the weight of his reputation and can’t afford to ask the same from others.

In this sense, Kaveh himself is an element of change for his community: he aims to help people in need without asking anything in return; and since he is unable to ask for help, those around him (Alhaitham, Tighnari, Cyno, etc) must notice his weaknesses and spontaneously attend his needs. This creates a reciprocal community focused on collectivism.

On the other hand, Alhaitham had a recluse childhood. His parents died before he was old enough to remember them, and his grandmother allowed him to study at home instead of the Akademiya. As a result, he grew up without forming meaningful interpersonal bonds and to be self-sufficient and of independent thought.

He is a character who lives outside the borders of society, independent from his relationship to others. It is precisely for this reason that he’s able to detach himself from the Akademiya during the archon quest in order to overthrow Azar —even though, as we know, it was a selfish decision in nature, since he wanted to maintain his job as the Scribe (and therefore, the stability that Kaveh relied on to survive).

We’ve seen the problems that belonging to a community conveys in Nahida and Alhaitham’s story quests: the people who wanted to avoid grief by staying with the memories of their dead loved ones, and the scholars who felt ostracized from their community and organized into a hive mind to share their strengths (though at the same time sharing their weaknesses).

Though both gathered people with a unified interest that made the community function, the nature of this collective commitment was fragile and fated to fail. However, rather than focusing on individual faults, it’s important to note the characters who got involved in these communities were more a product of their environment and a victim to their own human vulnerabilities, whether grief, arrogance or loneliness.

Unlike Alhaitham, who has a comfortable job that pays well enough to spend on luxuries and doesn’t have any blood relatives to take care of or fulfill filial piety for, characters like Ilyas were burdened by these constraints, and the additional emotional need to belong in society.

(In Chinese, that final “us” is between quotes)

Interpreting this line in terms of how society is built, Nahida argues that there are common people who depend on the support of a community to survive and thrive (the “mediocre majority”), so naturally without them there is no nation (“us”).

Only focusing on people’s strengths while leaving their weaknesses unattended, like in the Hivemind from Alhaitham’s quest, makes the structure of the community frail and it will easily crumble.

Supplying a means to ignore people’s pains or vulnerabilities instead of actual support, like the illusion world created to avoid grief from Nahida’s story quest, only leads to stagnation.

A nation is not made of exceptional individuals only either, nor is it upheld only by those with more power. Everyone deserves to have their needs met, and everyone can contribute in their own ways.

A collective formed on the basis of collectivism and altruism is fated to succeed, Nahida is right to consider this in her concept of an ideal nation. However, Alhaitham is not blind to this fact either (or at the very least, the events of the archon quest and his collaboration with Cyno, Dehya and the traveler contribute in changing his mind).

He has an exceptional intellect, but that doesn’t mean he lacks emotional intelligence as it’s usually assumed. He may not share the pains of others like an empath, but the archon quest proved that emotion should be appreciated where it’s meant to be valued: this was precisely the key to fight the sages at the Akademiya when they used Cyno as an involuntary mole.

At the end of the Sumeru archon quest, Alhaitham says this about the Grand Bazaar during the toast of victory:

The Grand Bazaar that supports the theater is depicted as a small community that thrives on collectivism within the borders of the city in Nilou’s story quest and lore.

The locals are fine giving away their merch for free so that the goods won’t be wasted, that they welcome anyone who is willing to be part of them and protect each other fiercely, and that they share a bond that goes beyond just working for wages.

We're all like neighbors, so we're always helping each other out. It's easy to forget that everyone's running a business. That's why there's no need to stress over freebies. All of us replay others by helping them when they need it.

These bonds are not formed on the basis of academic pursuits, but on human connection. It is not measured by the results produced of joint collaboration, and whether there’s failure or success, they can still stand on their own and act as a support for both parties.

It’s only when the basis for a community centers around supporting and relying on each other beyond transactional or academic interests that a true, successful collective can be achieved.

We can observe this in the Akadmiya-independent micro-communities formed by Cyno, Tighnari and Collei; between Kaveh and Alhaitham who are cohabitating despite their intellectual differences in a house that Kaveh gave up ownership of; and by Alhaitham, Cyno, Kaveh and Tighnari, who we know have become friends despite not sharing any form of academic activity.

Now, that's nice and all, but we have the omnipresent problem of the Akademiya and the political class that rules the nation. Echoing Nahida's words about Kaveh's ideals: the truth as he understands it will never be accepted as the mainstream.

In Marxist philosophy, cultural hegemony is the dominance of a culturally diverse society by the ruling class who manipulate the culture of that society—the beliefs and explanations, perceptions, values, and mores—so that the worldview of the ruling class becomes the accepted cultural norm.

Marxist homeboy Antonio Gramsci proposed that cultural hegemony, the domination of one class over another, is supported by intellectuals, which he considered to be a role in society (rather than an adjective describing someone who devotes themselves to study or whatever), who safeguard the interests of their respective social class.

Sumeru doesn’t tackle issues of social class (I’m hoping because they saved it for Fontaine), but it does center its narrative around the institution of education, where the upper class intellectuals are traditionally formed.

Education in Gramsci's marxist theory is the supporting block of oppression and exploitation, as it serves to create intellectuals that only look after the interests of the political elite: lower classes and marginalized communities don't have direct access to them, and those who do join the system become intellectuals who serve the upper classes, not their own.

Cyno, as an agent of the state that keeps order and punishes those who defy the rules (alright he's a cop), and Setaria, a scholar working directly for Azar in their secret project, both are originally from the desert, but serve the interests of the ruling class. This is not meant to offend their pixel integrity (they are overseeing the projects of education in Aaru Village in the aftermath of the archon quest), but to point out the reality that the intellect of marginalized groups is "stolen" by the upper classes.

Their two minor character arcs in the archon quest revolve around confronting the guilt they feel and taking responsibility for their lack of defiance, and they're both key actors in overthrowing the political class.

The other major actor is Alhaitham, an intellectual that belongs to the upper class but separates himself from their interests and goals, as his grandmother raised him to live a simple life without ambitions.

Before Gramsci, Lenin proposed that change had to come from the top to the bottom: educated intellectuals had to give up the privileges of their social class and provide that education for lower classes. This is certainly an idealistic view, and I don't like it much for how unrealistic it is, but genshin's not the first nor the last to adhere to this perspective.

You can see this same narrative in the work of Bong Joonho, for example: the intellectual that pushes the ideas of revolution in Snowpiercer was originally from the front side of the train; and the family in Parasite is condemned to suffer through the system because they lack the element of the educated intellectual.

Alhaitham in the archon quest is the driving force in the plan to overthrow Azar, regardless of his motivations, and at no point is his privilege an obstacle for this purpose. It's not an unforgivable creative choice, but I was disappointed by it. I wished that at some point Dehya or Candace would be able to resolve something he couldn't precisely because of his limited understanding as a member of the upper class, but the closest we got was when Dehya proposed Raman to cut her arm.

She's a member of the marginalized community of the desert, yet not quite part of the working class since the eremites aren't regulated job within the system. But I'm glad at the very least she rejects Alhaitham's offer to join the Akademiya, so she doesn't become someone who upholds the values and interests of the elites.

Just as a sidenote, since this was discourse at some point, Alhaitham only asked her to join because he thinks she's a weirdo like him.

You can read into this narrative what you must, but the canon reason is that he sees himself in her, an equal, and he's against socializing so the only reason he could keep her in his life is within the workplace. Somebody teach this man to make friends, god.

Nilou is the only character that properly belongs to the working class of Sumeru (not a scholar, within the city, regulated by Akademiya) and her participation in the archon quest is rather on good faith, she trusts what Alhaitham, the intellectual, tells her. Which is not bad, realistically, change largely depends on the force of an uneducated working class that understands their own predicament and their suffering leads them to oppose the ruling class naturally.

And I mean the girl performed art as an act of political defiance, if you go to any protest you'll see art and performance that the community creates spontaneously. It's a form of expression that doesn't need academic background.

There's an extra layer, though.

Going back to Gramsci, in addition to traditional intellectuals, he thought there were also what he called organic intellectuals, those who fulfill this role with the expertise and knowledge acquired from their labor. Think, like, union leaders.

To put it simply, in her story quest, comrade Nilou unionizes the working class of her community (the Grand Bazaar) and fights for their rights as workers against the political class of the Akademiya. She rightfully becomes an organic intellectual that succeeds in protecting the rights and interests of her own social classs.

The theater, a community we saw earlier that functions on the basis of collectivism, is informed it will be demolished for not having academic (and therefore economic, since academic merit is the capital of the nation) value, and she gathers the collective experience and knowledge of the Grand Bazaar to participate in a debate against one of the Akademiya's representatives.

And they win!

Anti capitalism and pro communist narratives can either be approached in two believable ways in fiction: an allegory that encompasses the major issues and explores paths towards liberation, or a more down to earth depiction of a worker defending the rights of their small specific community.

genshin tried both in Sumeru, but personally I'm always going to find realistic stories about workers' right more meaningful, the rest just comes across as fantasy. But we need the fantasy too to believe in the possibility of liberation.

#genshin lore #genshin impact lore #sumeru lore #genshin analysis #if someone says something anti communist im going to kill myself in front of them to change the trajectory of their life #nilou #alhaitham #cyno #dehya

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tinydappledleaf · 9 months

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Title: Stay

Chapter: 5/6

Pairing: Ezra x f!Reader, Ezra x you (Reader is addressed by 'you' or nickname)

Rating: 18+, smut in chapter 6

Content: Situationship to romance, soft Ezra, intimacy, loss of limb (non-explicit), canon compliant

Summary: When you've almost given up waiting for him, a certain prospector returns to the Pug to call in a favor...

Ao3: complete fic

《 chaper 4 chapter 6 》

Chapter V

You won’t say it out loud, never are one to boast, but as the last screw seals the sleek outer case of Ezra's prosthesis seamlessly you feel awfully satisfied.

So is Cee, as she throws open the entrance door with a huge smile, a somewhat breathless Ezra in tow.

“I did it!” She exclaims and you nearly drop the whole arm in fright at the abrupt intrusion to your quiet moment. Gingerly disposing of it on your desktop, safe, you turn to face her. By now Cee stands amid the room, openly overjoyed with something you have not yet grasped, while Ezra drops onto the couch to catch his breath. The brisk walk home draws a cough from his battered lungs, but it doesn’t diminish the joy that twists the corners of his mouth upwards in a smirk.

Arm lazily thrown across the back of the couch, his grin rivals Cee's, despite the remaining rattle of each drawn breath. There’s something about his expression, that makes your heart skip a beat. A parental sort of proudness, revelling in his fosterling’s achievement. And Cee wastes no tick to let you in on what exactly the ruckus is about.

“I made it into the academy! They picked me for a scholarship for two whole seasons!”

“Never expected anything else, Birdie,” praises Ezra and winks at you from behind her back.

It doesn’t take more to infect you with their mutual excitement and you jump from your spot to spread your arms wide and envelop her in a big hug.

“Congratulations!” you cheer as you retreat a step, still trying to make heads or tails of the sudden but stunning information.

“How? I mean- They just do that? Give out scholarships?”

Puggart Bench’s academic complex is careful to pick they best they get. It might have nothing on all the luxuries the Ephrate offers, but education around here isn’t low-cost either. Most youths around do not receive any education whatsoever, learn solely what’s necessary to survive out in the Frontiers. Your own education consist merely of your own experience and whatever you'd picked up from the mechanics' proficieny when you'd helped out in repairshops as a teen.

But Cee is different. She deserves to thrive.

You know the academy does not throw out scholarships at random. They're sponsored by the Pug's big fish, seeking to pilfer the pool of graduates for the most promising alumni. The entry exams are tough, focused on fluid intelligence rather than factual knowledge, the base for quick and efficient tuition.

Her receiving scholarship means she has proven herself to the academy's Argus-eyed examiners.

But, even though you're very aware, you want the spotlight on her, want her to tell you herself about her success.

Eagerly she shakes her head 'no' to your question and fishes a signed letter from her bag. It’s a bit crooked and folded askew, but it is her proof. Her acquired treasure.

“I took a test, a few cycles ago, when I was out with Ez,” she hurriedly explains. The nickname makes you smile even wider. Tiny proof of the trust she's gained towards him and vice versa.

“I didn’t even think I could make it, that’s why I didn’t tell you, but they said I was in! I’m a bit late, so I need to catch up on a few things, but I can start as soon as I’ve packed my stuff!”

You take the letter she holds out to you and briefly study the summary of her result and, Kevva, are you impressed. You knew she was smart, never doubted her success from the tick she set foot into your life, but this is damn remarkable. And it grants her entrance to a life never available to most forlorn fringeborn kids.

“So, I take it you’re gonna leave soon?”

You hand the letter back to her and she nods fervently, as she shoves it into her satchel.

“Tomorrow morning,” she confirms and it makes you grow immediately wistful. Cee can be a handful, like each youth and some, but through cycles spent under one roof and around the same 'table', you’ve come to care more about her than you had initially expected. She reminds you of your kid sister, fierce and sharp, but just as kind, and never ever capitulating to whatever life throws at her feet. She’ll get far. And you dearly hope, you’ll be allowed to witness it.

“I guess I’m gonna go and... well, pack my stuff now,” says Cee, as the adrenalin of her glee slowly dwindles to a steady nervous bubble. Thumbing in your bedroom’s direction, she takes a few steps towards it. “Thank you… for letting me stay.”

You brush it off with a flick of your hand.

“You’re always welcome to visit.”

Which she will, you hope, on the occasional break of her studies.

Nodding gratefully, she retreats into what has become her room and you already feel the pull of her absence.

Settling one hand on your hip, you watch the door close until a soft clap prompts you to turn.

Ezra pats the cushion beside him and you gladly accept his invitation. You flop down and melt into his side until your cheek rests on his shoulder.

“You’re gonna miss her so dreadfully,” you mutter and Ezra gives a noncommittal hum. But you can feel the sigh he breathes in the rustle of your hair, the way he deflates beside you as he drops his head onto the backrest.

Closing your eyes, you enjoy the silence, the solidness of his body against your own. Just for a second, you'll allow yourself to enjoy his presence.

Until you remember your own little surprise.

Well, not much of a surprise since he's almost constantly been lurking around your space. But he does not yet know that you're finished.

Ezra grumbles as you sit up a little straighter, but doesn’t complain as you flip yourself over to face him. Both legs pulled up beneath yourself and tucked into tailor-fashion, you grin at him.

“I got somehting for you as well.”

“You do?” He quips and tilts his head to eye you, tired but smirking. You realize he's probably already noticed when you'd nearly dropped the prosthetic arm as Cee breezed in. Nonetheless you’re not inclined to cancel the revelation of your hard work.

Untangling your legs, you get up and retrieve the finished piece from your workbench. There’s no need for fancy wrapping or a box. He’s curiously observed you working on it for cycles on end. Seeing the finished thing is different, however, and it shows on his face.

Emotions flitter across his features as you settle back beside him like before, the prosthetic arm now displayed on your lap for him to see. There’s gratitude in his smile, wistfulness in the knitting of his brow and a hint of caution in the way his fingers gently trace its sturdy frame. You’ve built it to last and aid him in whatever future challenges life is about to set on his trail. Soft rubber fingertips and palm allow gentleness as much as a secure grip and, if he chooses to, a rudimentary sense of touch.

You watch him patiently as he places his flat hand against the one you created, each finger lining up against its artificial counterpart to near perfection. The sight mists your eyes and you need to blink a few times to clear your vision as Ezra speaks.

“You’ve outdone yourself, Patches," he starts haltingly. He looks almost torn. Unprepared to flip open this new chapter of his future and yet thrilled to.

"I couldn't possibly clothe my gratitude for this in words and I vow that I'll do my damnest to provide some compensation-"

He falls utterly silent as your hands raise to gently grasp his jaw and raise his head to face you. You feel him swallow harshly as you lean in, eyes closed, and touch your forehead to his, mute and soft, but all the same conveying that its okay. That he doesn't need to compensate for anything.

Its a bold move, but you can't help it. Cee's departure is a mere cycle away and if you aren't completely mistaken, he won't stick around much longer. Even with her scholarship, two seasons from now he'll have to fork out a hefty sum if he wants her to continue. And he does, you're certain of that.

He won't spent his time dawdling about with you if there's still a fortune to make, somewhere out there.

Ezra's your alley cat, after all.

He might return and stay a bit if you feed him. But other than that, he does whatever tickles his fancy.

Its nice, though, somehow. His skittish visits, the little feline presents he keeps dropping on your figurative doormat. A pretty rock. A beautiful flower. Or a forlorn little birdie.

But if he disappears on you again...

If he disappears on you again, you need him to know that you'll be waiting. That you'll patch him up each and every time he drags himself home to you.

"Promise me one thing?"

He hums his question, prompting you to go on, as you scooch closer and wrap your arms around his neck. Nose buried against his shoulder, you fumble for words that suddenly feel inappropriate. No strings attached, you remind yourself. As much as you yearn for one to tug on gently, signal him that you need him, wait for him to do the same.

"Nevermind," you mumble, but his low chuckle tells you he's long caught on anyway. His arm pulls you closer as he mirrors your affection and he's warm and close and its all so fucking unfair.

"I hereby vow," he begins solemnly and murmurs his promise right into your ear, "that I'll take more caution on any future endeavor. You hear me, Patches? I'll be careful and I'll be back home before you even notice me gone."

The latter is a blunt lie. As if his absence could ever go unnoticed. Nothing rings louder than the silence he leaves. Nonetheless, you grasp the sentiment. No detours, no gratuitous risk. Only then you fully comprehend his words.

Home. He considers this, you, home.

Ezra, wanderlust personified, the incorrigible scoundrel scouring the Frontiers for riches, thinks of you as his home. You've been his friend, his safe haven. But never before home. It constricts your throat, makes you curl into him. You've let yourself feel too much, as of late. You'll regret it when he sets out again, but at this moment, yu can't help it.

"Thank you," you mutter and sense him smile against your skin, his returning stubble a pleasant prickle.

Reluctantly you let go of him, slowly resume your initial position and rub the treacherous moisture from your eyes. If he does observe it, he doesn't comment on the brief crumble of your resilient facade.

"So," You clear your throat and he listens, patiently, "You wanna try it?"

"Why, yes." He says with such severity, it lures something between a chortle and a sniffle from you as he pulls his shirt over his head and discards it haphazardly somewhere on the couch behind.

"Ain't gonna let that work of yours go to waste. Show me what it's got."

Refusing to let yourself be distracted by his bareness, again, you slip into professionalism and carefully inspect his stump before you proceed. He shivers under your gentle touch, but keeps his mouth shut for once while you evaluate what you see. You've checked his wounds on a regular basis, satisfied with watching him heal under your care. The stitches in his abdomen have dissolved enough by now to be nearly gone and the remainder of his arm is free of infection, the laceration fully closed.

"If gets too uncomfortable or hurts, tell me right away," you instruct him.

"The area is most likely still tender, even though its healed pretty well. You're sure lucky Cee did manage such a clean cut, otherwise this might have gotten really ugly for you."

From the corner of your eye you see him pull a face that tells you its been nasty enough as is and you feel for him. But its the truth and you know he's truly more than grateful for her help, for granting him the chance to live and escape the purgatory that is the Green. Glum memories are swiftly wiped away when his attention shifts back to your doing.

Step by step you show him the process of attaching his artificial limb, patiently help him to adjust the gapped liner to ensure all electrodes sit in proper contact to his skin. It takes time and some frustration on his side until his stump sits snugly inside his brand-new limb. When it does, he watches almost reverently as you show him how to safely seal it through the press of a button. A quiet hiss of the remaining air being expelled securely attaches the artificial appendage to his remaining arm.

"All good? Nothing pinches?"

"Nope," he says, eyes still glued to his arm. "Snug as a bug in a rug."

Shaking your head at his antics, you inch a bit back to allow him some space.

"Go ahead, try it."

Your gentle encouragement relieves his momentary rigor and you observe him lift his arm from his lap, still held horizontal and otherwise unmoving. He halts, concentrated. Testing its weight maybe? You aim to keep it realistic, not too light, not too heavy. Still, it differs from what he's experienced ever since loosing the arm he was born with. You've often heard that it feels foreign or unpleasant, even. It takes some getting used to.

Before you can say anything, however, he seems to have arranged himself with it for the time being and your smile widens as he slowly unbends it at the elbow, then twists the wrist to point its palm downwards. Fingers jerkily curl, form a fist and uncurl with a little more grace.

A few practicing repeats of the motion smooth out the initial stutter.

You hear his held breath rush out in a soundless, incredulous laugh when he touches the rubbery pads of his fingers against his thumb, visibly stunned that he feels it. Its by far not like the real thing - more a general feedback of touch that grows with rising pressure. But its something. And suddenly its him who blinks back the mist in his eyes and it makes you want to hold him all over again.

The sound of your name interrupts your thoughts, albeit registers a little belated for the reason that it is your actual name instead of his beloved moniker for you.

You tear your eyes away from his arm to face him.

And two simple words, rough around the edges with raw emotion, carry more meaning than all of his impressive vocabulary ever could.

"Thank you."

#ezra prospect #ezra x reader #ezra x you #pedro pascal #prospect 2018 #prospect film #ao3 #ezra prospect fanfiction #f!reader #fluff #leaf writes

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user-needs-new-hyperfixation · 1 year

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Hi. First of all I love your writing. To me, all writers have like, a "texture" or a color or a smell I relate their writing to, and yours is like a warm fluffy blanket lol

Secong, Idk if you're still doing the answering thing, but if you are, do you think you could pull more sherliam-as-uncles headcanons out your sleeve? Whether it be to Johnmary's kid, Mycroft's kid or any kid really, it's my favourite thing in the world xd

Oh my goodness, thank you so much! The idea of my writing as a warm fluffy blanket is like a warm fluffy blanket wrapped around my own heart! 🥰

I would be absolutely over the moon if canon lets John and Mary have a baby at some point. Imagine this whole motley gang of a cast handling a baby! And since things have already changed in that Mary didn't die during the years Sherlock was gone like she did in ACD canon, there's a whole future opened up there.

I think Sherlock and William would be incredible uncles, while also absolute pains to the parents involved. Kids would just soak up knowledge from them: they would make learning SO. MUCH. FUN. Meanwhile John is just begging Sherlock to stop teaching his kids how to cause smelly and potentially explosive chemical reactions. This all kind of plays into my Sherlock and William start a school fantasy, because I think between the two of them they would make learning so accessible. Kids who have a hard time studying words on a page get to do hands-on experiments with Sherlock. Kids who struggle with math get William breaking it down into such small and precise pieces that it starts to make sense. Kids who need a gentle voice get William assuring them there are no stupid questions, and kids who thrive on being challenged get Sherlock affectionately prodding them and competing with them.

Everyone's kind of scared to let them babysit, because their kids might come home with dyed hair and inkstains on their clothes and a pet rat they acquired from who-knows-where. But the kids beg to go to their place, and they always come back beaming and with fifty new facts to rattle off excitedly.

As the kids get older, Sherliam are the uncles they can talk to about anything. Crushes and sex and drugs/alcohol and sexual identity and religion and morality and the fears and excitements of living in time of constant change. Even when they're rebellious teens and don't want to talk to their parents, they always feel like they can open up to Uncle Sherlock and Uncle Will.

As for Sherlock and William, they love kids, but aren't the sort to adopt themselves. They like to have their space, ultimately, and be free to easily travel and go on adventures without worrying about kids at home and like...bang in the kitchen without having to think about little eyes around. 😂 So it's a perfect fit for them to be uncles, and maybe teachers, and invest in the next generation while still being free to do their own thing too.

#moriarty the patriot #yuukoku no moriarty #sherliam #asks

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narcoticwriter · 1 year

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A Brief Speculation on 'Wisdom' and Those with an Affinity for Dendro

I know, it's under a cut and that I called this 'brief', but for me? Personally and consistently? This is brief.

Wisdom is defined as 'the ability or result of an ability to think and act utilizing knowledge, experience, understanding, common sense, and insight' (Dictionary.com). There is a distinct note to what types of things are utilized in wisdom considering this definition.

In the same way, the people who hold Dendro Visions all exhibit some facets of wisdom in this sense as well as others. Another trait that corresponds with this inquiry is that they are also quite principled in both word and practice, but are also not afraid to consider other points.

I believe this is what these individuals embody:

Tighnari - Practical Wisdom (Application)

Tighnari is one of the more well-rounded individuals when it comes to wisdom, specifically when he decided to step back from the Akademiya to practice his profession more freely.

He's an excellent mentor to Collei, teaches others what he has learned in his course of studies, and helps individuals with his specialized skillsets, further cementing this label.

However, I will also say that there is some evidence that he occasionally lacks some foresight, as he has tried going into the desert a multitude of times despite his condition.

It is not to be forgotten that even if he doesn't sound like it, he is earnest, cordial, and mostly tactful when it comes to his dealings with others.

Collei - Personal Wisdom (Growth)

While this may seem out of place, I argue that Collei has absolutely acquired wisdom in her own right due to her experiences and her drive to better her own station.

Although her circumstances are unique and she's grappling with them to this day, the steady commitment to becoming a Forest Ranger as well as learning how to read and write is commendable.

I will say that though she has acquired some knowledge already, she still has some way to go before being to where she wants to be, and she understands this to a certain degree.

She's also beginning to understand herself with how she interacts with others, tackles obstacles, and if her character story is anything to go by, relies more on what she's learned than not.

Nahida - Pure Wisdom (Holistic)

As the Dendro Archon as well as having the Irminsul as a source of information, it is no question that she would exhibit the most wisdom out of everyone in this listing.

However, it is also to note that there is a distinct lack of experience that she has with people and interacting with the world around her as she was essentially under house arrest for 500+ years.

This, however, does not at all understate the fact that she is trying to do so after the fact, which is a sort of wisdom in itself as you must try things to become proficient at them.

It's no mistake that Nahida was designed as if akin to a child as it is said that children have a sort of honest and forthright wisdom that is often lost as they grow up.

Al-Haitham - Logical Wisdom (Thinking)

Al-Haitham's wisdom is entirely practical and logical as well as extremely methodical in its approach and application to what he views as how his regular life should be.

It's not a question of if he's knowledgable or has common sense, but precisely who and what it affects, as many people praise this but are also put off by it.

One type of wisdom that Al-Haitham either lacks or chooses not to use is one of experience and understanding in the sense that while he could break it down, he himself has not been in it nor cares to empathize with it.

This is not to say that he lacks empathy in the sense that he won't do things for others if it benefits him or be able to methodically explain how others might feel about it, but he is not going to go out of his way to bring himself to the same level.

Yaoyao - Eager Wisdom (Openness)

Yaoyao is a unique individual when compared to some of the others, but as I've stated before, a child seeking out wisdom is profoundly open, forthright, obvious, fearless, and uninhibited.

As such, Yaoyao employs very much the same approach as she's mentored under Madame Ping, taught by the adepti, and interacting with Liyue Harbor and beyond.

Yaoyao is quite young, so she's not going to have much experience, understanding, or knowledge yet, but she displays a common sense and foresight not typically seen in others her age.

I would make the argument that she is well on her way to getting there as she continues to grow and take in everything there is to see and experience.

Baizhu - Selfless Wisdom (Altruism)

From his interactions with his patients to how he approaches his practice and medicine, it is no mistake that he displays some attributes of wisdom.

Being a doctor requires having extensive knowledge concerning the condition of the patient, experience on how to treat them, insight into the potential symptoms and effects of treatment, and understanding how the body works with all of the different factors involved.

I will say that while he does have common sense in terms of how to navigate life in his incapacitated state, I will also say that being in this state in the first place was a choice.

Regardless of his circumstances, he's actively searching for a way to rid himself and the world of his aliment even as it continues to devour him from the inside out, quite altruistic in that sense.

Kaveh - Empathic Wisdom (Ideals)

While it may seem that Kaveh having wisdom is more of a question than a certainty, the types that he displays have certain values that aren't measured by anything concrete.

Even though he is a genius in his own right and knowledgeable in what he does, he also has insight into what affects things in a wider, more complete sense.

This, unfortunately, is also used in the sense that he applies this to people, as his wisdom lies in the empathetic understanding and experience of where he's been in life as applied to others besides himself.

As a result of this skewed approach to life, Kaveh holds an idealized application of wisdom that - in his current state - is not obtainable given his lack of common sense and an insight toward himself that is virtually non-existent.

Kirara - Curious Wisdom (Learning)

While it could be a question of why a literal cat acquired a Vision, I believe that Kirara's becoming a nekomata in the first place exhibits a level of inherent curiosity that denotes wisdom.

As she eagerly picks up new skills and utilizes the ones she already has, she gains experience in how to interact with the world around her as well as becoming knowledgeable in human customs and routines.

However, Kirara also has the tendency to run headlong into some situations with more or less no idea what to expect, thinking on her toes like a cat would, so a lack of foresight could apply here.

Despite this, I would say that her enthusiasm and zeal for life demonstrate a wisdom that comes with not being afraid to fumble and fall, but also pulling yourself back up to try it again.

In summary, they may have a few stumbling blocks, but they're all wise in their own ways given their experiences and knowledge.

Final Notes: This is in no way a thorough and conclusive analysis as I mostly drew upon what I remembered and didn't go the length of meticulously combing the wiki, reading voice lines, watching videos, doing research, and other things like that. There's a high chance that someone out there has already done a much better job than me and this was mostly just me thinking a whole lot. Regardless, feel free to add your own thoughts and comments to this if you'd like.

Until next time, I'll see you when I see you.

#going ham #genshin impact #genshin analysis #genshin speculation #dendro #narky thinks #tighnari #collei #nahida #al haitham #yaoyao #baizhu #kaveh #kirara

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kiruuuuu · 1 year

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Sun's Out, Guns Out - Day 5!🌈

Hi all, this is your quarterly reminder that I'm not dead 😊 As always, @dualrainbow has organised a Pride event and I'm happy to participate! Give them a follow and check out the other entries 💖

Since I tend to resort to my favourites when I can't write what I want to write (motivation, thy name is fickleness), this one features Thatcher and Lesion trying to figure out a few things. Well, mostly Thatcher. Please enjoy!! (Rating G/T, fluff, ~3.3k words)

Mike Baker has always had a knack for teaching. Born from the addicting sensation of being smarter than everyone, he quickly realised there’s actual merit in passing on hard-earned knowledge founded on a mixture of theory and painful experience. It took him a while to suppress the resentment of witnessing others, armed with his wisdom, excel immediately where he had to struggle for much longer, but once he overcame that particular ego trip, he started receiving heartfelt compliments.

And, well, he likes those.

Suddenly, he played a part in many success stories, was cited as a major influence by skilled operators around the world, and shook hands with others whom he admired on equal footing. There are other advantages as well, like broadening his horizon through exchanges with young minds from vastly different cultures, many of which left him befuddled at first yet enriched in the long run. He’s often called old school, a term he wears with pride instead of embarrassment seeing as it stems from his conviction that advanced technology might be useful but ultimately a crutch. He’s opened many eyes to the old ways and no doubt saved countless lives by empowering others to acquire survival skills not reliant on newfangled tech.

This, too, he learnt the hard way. After the disaster in ‘92, he vowed never to allow something like it again.

Amidst the coaching, he endeavours to learn from his students just as they soak up his advice. Not always successful, he still tries to grasp their differing world views and outlooks, attempts to understand how they developed and why his own rarely match. Finding similarities is easy, there’s timeless topics such as cars, sports and physical fitness, and beyond that cyclical trends materialise and disappear over the course of a decade or two – whisky, gardening, woodworking, it all recurs.

But the longer Thatcher pushes his retirement, the more he perceives a rift forming between his generation and the younger ones. Not having any children himself (or any friends who do), he’s reliant on his work relationships to keep him up-to-date, and while there’s no shortage of sensible, eager young men in the SAS as a whole, Rainbow generally features established, well-adjusted operators who need little guidance.

So… maybe it’s the small sample size. In any case, Thatcher is increasingly perplexed when Mute mentions most of his friends don’t even own a car anymore. Or that they have no notion to buy a house and settle down – even Thatcher considers marriage optional, seeing as his own crashed and burned spectacularly, but not wanting to own property? And the absolutely disrespectful way Mute speaks of national treasures like the Queen and Thatcher’s namesake (which, alright, he’s had long discussions about this and maybe she wasn’t the progressive saint he once thought she was, but still – defacing her monument just isn’t funny).

At first he was filled with a giddy sort of glee when the taciturn, serious young Brit opened up to him, heeded his advice and even looked to him first when he was unsure about anything work-related, but the longer they spend conversing about their private lives, the more Thatcher wishes he’d never asked in the first place. He’s fairly sure he will never understand the point of ‘memes’, no matter how often Mute tries to explain.

And one day, a humid, muggy Friday in June, Mute approaches him with a problem for which Thatcher has no answer ready yet. So he does what he always does when he’s unable to process news or make his mind up: ask the one person for help to whom he’d entrust his life without a second thought.

~*~

“Mark thinks he’s gay”, says Thatcher, apropos nothing, as he turns the page from sports to local news. ‘Hotel California’is softly pouring out of the radio next to the toaster – the classic rock station isn’t his favourite but one meaningful glance over Simon & Garfunkel incentivised him to switch to it. He didn’t want to be accused of being a lonely old man again.

Across the table, Lesion visibly smothers his initial reaction, whichever it would’ve been; there’s an unnatural half-blink and an almost imperceptible pause in guiding the ham-topped croissant to his mouth. And Thatcher thinks: here we go.

They haven’t fought in a while. Not for the entire year, actually, if he discounts their usual bickering (and he’s inclined to, it barely counts despite the awkward atmosphere it forces bystanders to endure, which is incidentally Thatcher’s favourite part). He regrets having to sacrifice their harmonious breakfast which, apart from the at-times questionable songs wafting over, is nearly perfect where he’s concerned. Lesion bought fresh muffins for Thatcher and croissants for himself, Thatcher provides good-quality cold cuts, they share a pot of tea and discuss whatever is new either in their lives or the world. It’s idyllic.

Sadly, he’ll have to ruin it – for the greater good.

Could he introduce the topic in a less inflammatory way? Sure. Would it have the same result, i.e. a quietly destructive Lesion who chooses his words so carefully it’s hard to imagine he’s simultaneously holding himself back from throttling Thatcher? Absolutely not. And therefore this is the only option remaining.

Once Lesion has bought himself some time to process Thatcher’s remark by carefully chewing for an inordinately long time, he avoids his gaze and asks, very calm: “Did he drink too much and say a few things he now regrets?”

Deflection. With a joke, at least, Thatcher taught him that – when they first met, Lesion would raise his brows and change the topic when confronted with anything he did not want to comment on. Either he’s attempting to save the mood or his brain is working overtime to figure out how to respond. Good. So he doesn’t know what to think about this either.

“Nah. We both know the lad barely drinks.”

Lesion begins pushing the crumbs on his plate into a neat pile. “He does when James is around.”

And this is why Thatcher chooses him for any difficult topic. Lesion has mastered the art of being unobtrusive and inoffensive to the point where everyone around him either forgets his presence or believes him to be an accomplice of sorts, thus dropping all inhibitions. His skills in information gathering and observation are unparalleled and Thatcher enjoys making use of them, even if it’s for petty purposes.

Well. Especially for petty purposes.

He’s right, of course, he always is: Thatcher retroactively analyses Mute’s behaviour around his colleague and concludes that yes, Mute does indeed let Smoke be a bad influence on him.

“Tell me what happened.”

Somehow, the initial friction has disappeared and though Thatcher would prefer a sharper exchange of words, he plays along for now. “Julien dragged him to a Pride event last week and some bloke there talked Mark into believing he fancies James. He’s not fully sure, though, so he poured his little heart out to me.”

He spots the tell-tale crease between Lesion’s brow. He’s getting pissed – even though Thatcher isn’t entirely certain why. But that’s what he’s here to find out. “I have additional questions”, Lesion states after a moment, “but I think it’s best if you tell me your thought process first.”

“On what?”

“You seem to disagree with him. I’d like to hear why.”

“With whom?”

Lesion refuses to take the bait and get angry over stupid details. His patience is another virtue Thatcher admires greatly. “With Mark’s assessment of himself.”

“That he thinks he’s gay?”

“Yes.” He takes a sip of his tea. “That.”

Alright then. If this was anyone else, Thatcher would refrain from elaborating, wave it off and attribute it to personal differences rather than risk offending or coming across as ignorant. The two of them, however, have known each other for such a long time that no such anxieties remain: they’ve both made idiots of themselves in front of the other, have supported each other through various crises, have become such an important and fundamental part of each others’ lives that he discards any vanities in favour of personal growth.

Most of the time.

Which doesn’t contradict his urge to exasperate his best friend. It’s almost… charming? Endearing? He’s not sure of the correct term, but it does leave a deep, satisfying feeling in the low of his stomach to watch Lesion ruthlessly apply logic to try and change his mind, working himself up to unmerciful gentleness with which he both ensures victory and that Thatcher’s pride isn’t hurt. These days, he rarely allows himself any indulgences, yet Lesion’s cutting rhetoric is too addicting.

He’s not proven wrong often, but with this man, he almost enjoys it.

“We’ve talked about it before”, he starts, Lesion keeping up eye contact now as he finishes the other half of his croissant, “being gay isn’t a choice.”

An encouraging nod. So far, so good.

“Either you’re born gay or you’re not.”

The nodding fades. Surely, he can’t object this early.

“So either you know that you’re gay, or you don’t know, which means you’re not. And yeah, there’s the bisexuals and whatever, but they know who they are as well. Mark on the other hand said he never really had any interest in anyone until now – but if he was gay, that wouldn’t have happened.” He probably should stop talking. Lesion is looking at him, mid-chew, the same way he did when Thatcher ranted about poor people always buying poor quality products even though purchasing slightly more expensive, higher-quality ones would last much longer.

Which, alright. He conceded the point eventually.

Another sip of tea after the croissant has disappeared. Lesion adds more crumbs to his pile. “Is it too late then?”, he asks, curious. “For him to realise he fancies men.”

“Huh? No.” Ridiculous. As if there was some kind of cut-off point where lads had to live as heteros because they didn’t claim their gayness fast enough. “No, what I mean is… he’s just not gay. He’s found a kindred spirit in James, somehow, and I predict he’s going to turn into an annoying little gremlin under his supervision, but he’s confusing a serious, close friendship with, I don’t know, attraction? Romance?” The more he scrutinises it in his head, the more sense it makes. “Yeah. He never fancied anyone before. How would he know what it feels like? I have the impression he just never had a friendship like that before.”

Actually, this is obvious – he’s almost embarrassed he couldn’t come up with the same explanation when Mark sought him out. No wonder the poor lad is a little lost, a shithead like Smoke will do that to an innocent soul.

Lesion is starting to shift now, sharpen around the edges, weighs his words more deliberately before he allows them to escape his lips. It’s reminiscent of how he is on the job, competent, no-nonsense. He might crack jokes and wear a smile but Thatcher’s gaze penetrates the thin veneer of jovial gestures to reveal remorseless efficiency. And though he respects that part of Lesion deeply, he also savours how pliable, how… domestic they are around each other. Lesion has saved his life more than once, and he’s helped remodel Thatcher’s bathroom. He asked Thatcher to test drive a used car he considered buying, and he’s killed with a smile and a shrug.

If he’s honest, Thatcher prefers his softer side. There’s something peaceful in sitting in his garden and trying to spot birds, even if they’ve had to wash blood off their bodies more times than they care to count.

“How did he come to the conclusion that he likes James?” Gathering more necessary intel. Thatcher suppresses a grin.

“I can’t recall his exact words, it was surprisingly flowery. Maybe he dreamt about kissing him, felt like he was having butterflies in his stomach whenever James texted him, something along those lines. Typical shite, you know. But I mean, that’s normal.”

Lesion’s eyes snap up.

Oh? He’s picked up on something though Thatcher wouldn’t know what exactly. They’re still dancing around the issue, Lesion hasn’t formulated his point yet so it’s difficult to tell what he’s thinking. It’s no fight yet.

“Normal stuff”, Lesion repeats and it sounds very close to a question. He must know what Thatcher means.

“Aye. Everyone has these kinds of thoughts, even if there’s some kind of stigma on it since blokes barely talk about it. It’s curiosity, nothing more, the brain latches on to something and you can’t get it out of your head for a while. Like buying a new car, innit? A mate gets himself a brand new ride and suddenly, you want one too. It’s almost impossible to push that thought away.”

“… a new car.” It seems Lesion has resorted to parroting bits and pieces of Thatcher’s speech. Again, with anybody else, he’d be upset that he’s opening up about a topic rarely discussed between men and met with hesitant mockery, but this is Lesion. His best friend would rather jump out the window than hurt him deliberately.

“Not the best metaphor maybe, but you get the gist. He’ll just have to pull himself together and realise it’s perfectly normal to have these kinds of, I don’t know, intrusive thoughts, and move on.”

Lesion’s face evokes the image of an exhausted mum debating internally whether she should let her child eat the crayons just so she can have a bit of peace and quiet. He’s still not contributing to their conversation which is frankly worrisome – not that Thatcher is apprehensive about what might be going on in his head, but he knows the longer he talks the worse it gets. The two of them have a code word for ‘you should probably shut up now’ and there’s a reason Lesion is the only one who uses it regularly.

“Do you not agree? Just because you think like this doesn’t mean you’re queer. Hell, most of the blokes on this earth would’ve ended up married to another bloke if they followed that line of thinking. The two of us might as well have married.”

This shakes Lesion out of his stupor. “Might as well”, he repeats, sounding oddly entertained. It seems he’s about to add something but decides against it, shaking his head a little before he takes a deep breath and gets up to pour himself another cuppa. Buying more time. This is getting serious. “Want the rest?”

Thatcher hands him his Arsenal mug, mulling over the phrase which seems to have sparked amusement in his best friend. There’s worse fates in the world than being tied to this man, he supposes – they get along better than any married couple he knows. Most days, their schedules are intertwined, they give and take in equal measure and have found compromises for all their differences in taste. “Might as well”, Thatcher mutters without meaning to and accepts the tea-filled mug with an added ‘ta’.

Instead of sitting back down, Lesion leans against the counter, fingers wrapped around the Winnie the Pooh mug he used to pick as a joke (and now defends from other guests), steady gaze resting on Thatcher without the hint of reproach. There’s a warmth in it he’s accustomed to seeing when it’s late and they drank a little too much. Quiet anxiousness rises in Thatcher; he can deal with exasperation but doesn’t do well with vulnerable sincerity.

“You’ve not talked about this with anybody else, I assume?”, Lesion asks.

“Of course not. If they’re all too embarrassed to say it out loud, I’m not gonna be the first one.”

An eternity passes while Lesion stands there, eyes drifting aimlessly around the cosy kitchen, and contemplates how to reply. Thatcher’s uneasiness increases with every passing second yet he knows better than to interrupt the other man’s thoughts. Despite his growing desperation to interrupt his own.

He has a feeling he won’t like what he’ll hear next.

“I wouldn’t call it ‘normal’”, Lesion starts hesitantly. “I do believe it’s not unusual to be curious in one’s younger years, but… dreaming about kissing your mates when you’re in your fifties is, um.”

Thatcher’s cheeks begin to heat up. He hopes he hasn’t committed a grave mistake. “Oh come off it – don’t tell me you don’t think about those things.”

“Ah…” The corners of Lesion’s mouth lift into a sheepish smile. “I do.”

“See!”

“But, Mike. I’m gay.”

Uh.

Thatcher’s brain screeches to a halt. “What”, he says and can’t keep the hint of anger out of his voice. Strangely, he feels betrayed rather than surprised, and it’s a tad odd to realise he’s genuinely upset over the fact Lesion never told him. He cares not one bit about his sexuality, Lesion can do whatever he wants, but Thatcher needs to be in on it. Still, it helps to distract him from the fact that Lesion’s earlier words open up an entirely different can of worms.

Which is that apparently Thatcher’s mind has significant overlap with that of a gay man, at least where other men are concerned, and he is not prepared to face this particular revelation just yet.

Maybe I should’ve married him, he thinks and suppresses the sudden, absurd urge to laugh.

“Do you want to talk about this?”, Lesion offers, still smiling, and it’s eerie how well he knows him – when conflicted, Thatcher tends to withdraw unless assisted, yet is too prideful to ask.

He appreciates the suggestion but appearances force him to weakly object: “Don’t you have errands to run today?”

Lesion shrugs. “They can wait. I’d rather make sure you don’t end up brooding the whole weekend.”

A fair assessment. Thatcher nods and is flooded with relief over having someone in his life so willing to talk about everything and nothing, except… Suddenly, there’s something else besides gratitude as well.

~*~

“… so, in conclusion, it doesn’t matter what you identify as. Just do what you feel is right, use your common sense – and I know you have a lot of that. If you feel an attraction, there’s nothing wrong with pursuing it without worrying about labels for the moment. Alright, lad?”

Mute stares at him in much the same way Thatcher’s family did on their last reunion when he asked for extra vegetables. He adds a mental note to teach Mute how to control his expressions better and keep his composure even when confronted with the unimaginable.

“Do I have something on my face?”

“No, I just -” The lad blinks a few times before starting to nod. “I mean, yeah. Thanks. That’s actually really helpful. I was worried about some of it, but what you said just… some things clicked.”

Boy does Thatcher know how that feels. “Don’t mention it. You got your head on straight, lad, keep it that way.” He realises too late and hastens to correct himself: “I don’t mean – well, you know what I mean.”

His awkward floundering earns him a grin he much prefers over the troubled look which has recently dominated the young man’s features. “Yeah. No worries.”

“Good man.” Thatcher pats his back and gets up, relieved their talk went smoothly and confident he’ll be able to manoeuvre similar conversations in the future. Which is a relief, because based on Mute’s memes, the entire younger generation is some kind of queer or other and he’s had his suspicions about Dokkaebi for a while.

“Just one question though.”

He turns to Mute, expecting anything from mundane to profound and certain he will be able to advise. After all, it’s his job to guide and teach wherever he can.

The lad points to Thatcher’s neck. “… is that a hickey?”

Alright.

Well.

Time to make up an excuse and get the fuck out of here.

#rainbow six siege #fanfic #oneshot #thatcher #lesion #smoke #mute #thatcher/lesion #smoke/mute #event #I either want to write 100% smut or 100k fics and there's no in between #so please accept this as an offering instead #inspired by comments about people who are ACTUALLY like thatcher and everyone hopes they figure it out eventually #lesion is starting to give me big kim kitsuragi vibes

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stormbabylore · 8 months

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⬆⬆⬆ Perceive Aeryn's early-Stormblood black mage glam! ⬆⬆⬆

I'm still on my black mage AU kick, so I'm gonna ramble out some brainthoughts on my lore for this iteration of Aeryn's story.

Mostly generic, but there will be one StB BLM class quest spoiler below.

Aeryn does not handle the events of the Vault well in any universe, canonically or otherwise. In canon, grief drives her to pick up dragoon again as what I like to call her "rage" class. But in her black mage AU, she takes a different approach.

Aeryn feels her "magic block" has become a deadly hindrance, regardless of Hydaelyn's gifts (or lack thereof at that point in the story). If she's to protect herself and her allies from enemies capable of wounding them with un-healable dark magics, she wants the knowledge and skill to do the same. She approaches the thaumaturges of Ul'dah for assistance. Cocobuki and the others, recognizing Aeryn's potential (and her need), set about to understand the source of her magic block and a means of breaking it. They determine Aeryn cannot easily wield magic in Eorzea due to some other, foreign source of magic inside her - one that is intertwined with her soul in such a way that it seems to "shelter" her from most outside magics. Though they none of them fully understand the source of such power, they all agree that Aeryn will likely never be able to properly channel magic without first severing her connection to that inexplicable power within.

The brothers are concerned at the potential dangers of this process. There's a possibility her soul and the magic surrounding it are inextricably linked, and given the mysterious nature of its existence, they have no way of knowing how its removal might impact her. They warn her it might sever her connection with the Mother Crystal. (Aeryn argues she has already lost that connection.) They warn her she might die. (Midgardsormr again taunts her with threats that there will be further losses - greater sacrifices made.)

Aeryn, however, is determined.

I believe it would have been a brutally painful experience. The notion of ripping away a magic embedded in your soul doesn't sound pleasant.

But they succeed - and in doing so, Aeryn opens herself to a floodgate of new magic all at once. Further, the magic that had threaded itself through her soul does not immediately disperse upon removal. It lingers within her. The combination of so very much magic, and the sudden influx of new magics, are too much for her. Though it overwhelms all her senses, at first, she finds the one most challenging to adapt to is a new sight - the ability to see the use of aether with her naked eye. The brothers acquire enchanted cloth for her to cover her eyes, which helps dull the sight of it enough for her to get by.

I'm not sure if Aeryn will ever learn the whole truth of her existence and the magic she was "born" with. (I'm waiting out Endwalker to see if story canon gives me anything to work with, there, before I decide.) But in both canon and AU, Aeryn begins getting flashes of memory throughout Shadowbringers that might help her piece together the story: the magic that was fused with her soul was the remnant magic of her dying star (what I've lovingly been calling the Fourth, though I have no idea if future game canon will break that for me). Her connection to her lost world had, in essence, been blocking her all along from fully connecting to the magic of the Source, as it continues to do in her canon.

[Spoiler for the StB BLM class quests below!]

As mentioned, the remnant magic extricated from her soul does not disperse, and she progresses through the rest of HW and most of StB bound by a lingering connection with the stars from her past life. So in the StB class quests, she is in a unique position to also sense the nearing of the comet, though she of course can't fathom why. When there is concern in those pivotal final moments of its approach that their efforts have not worked to redirect the comet in time, Aeryn inherently uses that lingering power to connect with the comet and further divert its course.

This act expels the vast majority of remnant star magic within her. The yellow fades from her hair, and as the comet draws away, Aeryn senses a great change within her and reaches up to remove the cloth from her eyes. With much of the excess magic gone, she is able to see as normal once again.

(If I had a way to change Aeryn's hair color for just one glam, her black mage look would not have yellow highlights! Her star magic is what makes her hair turn yellow when cut, so as a black mage, post-Stormblood, her hair would be entirely brown.)

That's it. That's the AU. \o/

#aeryn stormwater #wol lore #ffxiv oc #ffxiv wol #ffxiv #ffxiv screenshots #final fantasy xiv #ffxiv glamour #ffxiv black mage #black mage au #ffxiv au #stormblood spoilers #stb spoilers #final fantasy 14 #black mage #ffxiv screenies #ffxiv screencaps

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blood-darkened-moon · 2 years

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It’s All Alexander’s Fault, or Is It? – An Analysis of Alfred and Alexia’s Backstory

The Ashford twins are fascinating characters. Their whole life was such a tragedy, which left them horribly misguided. Outwardly, they appear to be somewhat strange, cruel, and ruthless, even as children. They tortured insects and used other people, including their father, for experiments. Killing people wasn’t a taboo either. Despite this, they were awkwardly close to either other. However, considering the circumstances of how they grew up, these things aren’t surprising. Most of their issues are connected to their father, Alexander Ashford, and how he treated them. The twins only existed because of Alexander’s selfishness. He never wanted children to love and care. Alexander wanted someone who made up for his mistakes and became a counterbalance to Spencer. Thus, he took the DNA of his ancestor Veronica and modified it to increase the intelligence of the clone. The sole purpose of their existence was to restore the family's glory. Only Alexia, who possessed all the desired traits, was planned. Alfred, who was above-average intelligent but still nowhere near Alexia’s level, was just a byproduct.

So here are some aspects of their lives and how Alexander may or may not have affected these.

Childhood and Youth

Alexia never complained about her early life despite how messed up it was. Even as the most intelligent human on the planet, you need to acquire knowledge through learning. Without knowledge, intelligence alone isn’t that useful. Alexia graduated from university at the age of 10. The games don’t say anything about her having a doctorate (neither do they deny it), but the position as a head researcher usually requires such a degree. So I will assume she had one. A doctorate in a scientific field takes about three years on average. It also involves doing your own research and publishing your results. Since experiments will take a while, plus you need to reproduce the results, and not everything will work out (immediately), you can’t shorten these three years too much. Furthermore, Alexia finished her thesis in 1981. Writing on a computer wasn’t a thing back then, and correcting mistakes with a typewriter meant you had to rewrite the whole page, which added to the time she needed. But let’s say Alexia was lucky, everything went well, and she only needed two years, so she was 8 when she started. Before her doctorate, Alexia must have studied at a university. Let’s be generous again and say she needed 2 to 3 years for this. This makes her 5 to 6 at the beginning, an age when children usually start going to school. She must have learned everything you learn in school before that age, which means her education started as soon as she was physically capable of it. Most likely, the first ten years of her life were learning, day in and day out, plus research later on. (Two more years in case she didn’t have a doctorate would only have a minimal effect on her education schedule. It just shifts the duration of other parts a bit.) Afterward, she became a head researcher at the Antarctica Base. Alexia now concentrated on the development of the t-Veronica virus. Additionally, this position involves staff responsibilities, for example, coordinating other researchers in the facility. Thus, 10-year-old Alexia had a full-time job, overtime included. Except for very few moments, the girl was probably never allowed to be a child or have a real childhood.

In addition to this insane schedule, we have to take Alexia’s (and Alfred’s) surroundings into account. Alexia spent her early years in the Antarctica Base, far from any civilization. The isolation served multiple purposes. First, it was easier for Alexander to hide his experiments from Spencer, who would likely be interested, considering his own projects. Second, it made it easier to manipulate the twins. Without “normal” families around as a comparison, it is less likely that they will complain about their situation. Third, Alexia won’t get distracted and can fully concentrate on learning. Going outside and playing with other children, except for Alfred, was out of the question. And where should they go in this frozen wasteland anyway? Their entire world was limited to the mansion in the lower levels and maybe the outdoor area near the base for a limited time when the weather allowed it.

While in Alfred’s case, it is more obvious how poorly he treated his children, the immense workload and pressure he put on Alexia’s shoulders showed how little Alexander cared about her as a person. Alexia was forced to grow up as fast as possible. Her worth was only determined by her performance. She was a tool to him, not his daughter. Alexander pushed her in this direction for his very own ambitions, isolating her from the world and praising her for her achievements and intellect, while he emotionally neglected Alfred (her only comparison) enough to make a somewhat average childhood look undesirable. Now, Alexia wasn’t an average child, and her intellect would likely have affected her interactions with children her age. Maybe she would have chosen a similar path at some point, even under different circumstances. But she never had a choice in this regard.

What about Alfred’s childhood? Since Alexander never expected anything from him, presumably, he had a little more from being a child than his sister. But was it good or at least better? His situation was similar to Alexia’s. He grew up in the same secluded place. His only playmates were Alexander, the domestic workers (i. a. Scott Harman, the butler), and Alexia. Alexander had other things to do than playing with the child he didn’t even care for and likely ignored his emotional needs if possible. The domestic workers may have played with him now and then. But unless Alexander hired someone specifically for this task (which I doubt), they had other work to do as well. And Alexia was busy most of the time (see above). Alfred must have spent most of his time playing alone or joined Alexia learning due to the lack of other options. This doesn’t sound great either.

Alfred’s childhood and youth didn’t last long anyway. It ended shortly before his 13th birthday. Losing his family, Alexia, in particular, impacted his mental health severely in a negative way. Though, he didn’t have enough time to deal with the consequences. At the age of 13, Alfred became the head of the Ashford family and had to take on a lot of responsibilities. Most importantly, he had to keep Alexia safe for 15 years. And this only worked because Alfred kept the family business running. He couldn’t risk Umbrella gaining more control over the Antarctica Base because then they would have found Alexia sooner or later. This wasn’t an easy task, considering his age and that he had no friends among Umbrella’s elite. Umbrella didn’t have a problem removing and replacing unwanted/uncomfortable personnel either, regardless of their status (like James Marcus later on). Despite all the obstacles and mistakes he made, Alfred managed to stay in charge of the Antarctica Base until his death in 1998. In addition, he had to take care of Rockfort Island. Alfred became mayor of this island and commander of the Umbrella facilities there. Also, at the age of 22, he graduated from a university. Taking into account that Alfred was way too young to deal with so many responsibilities and his unstable mental state, his achievements weren’t bad after all. He probably even could have restored his family's reputation without Alexia if Alexander would have been more supportive and if Alfred would have had a bit more time to grow up.

Personality

The isolation of Alfred and Alexia’s home meant very little interaction with other people. They grew up without a maternal figure. Their “mother” was a surrogate mother, who apparently only stayed as long as necessary. Alexander only focused on Alexia’s performance. And while Alexander’s servants took care of the twins’ physical needs, they couldn’t replace real parents or contact with other children. The twins never had the opportunity to develop normal social skills or healthy relationships outside their family. This left their marks on both.

Alexia started to see every single human on Earth ("the ignorant masses") as inferior to her, which fueled her world domination plans. Alexia was a genius, superior in many regards, and able to do what others couldn’t. All people in the Antarctica Base stood below her. They were either her servants or, later on, her employees. Additionally, Alexander taught his daughter that only achievements matter. All of this wouldn’t have been a problem in itself, but Alexia extrapolated her experience and what was taught to her and concluded she should rule the world since she is better than everyone else. It would have been Alexander’s duty to ground her occasionally, teach her moral values before things took a turn for the worse, and give her the opportunity to interact with people on the same level. Also, show her that people have different strengths and weaknesses and that the worth of someone cannot only be determined by their intelligence. Maybe this even would have saved his life since then Alexia could have seen more in him than a “useless father”. Working at such a young age (10-12) in a high position, like a head researcher, may have contributed as well. Your expertise doesn’t really matter. When you’re three to four times younger than most of your employees (and a literal child), I doubt that many people will take you seriously. It doesn’t help that her father owned the facility and that her grandfather was one of the company’s founders. She likely had to be strict and unforgiving and create a steep power gap to keep her authority, which increased the detachment from regular people.

As for Alfred, due to the lack of human contact, he solely focused on Alexia in a clingy, somewhat unhealthy way. Alexander indirectly supported Alfred’s dependency and fixation on his sister with his neglectful behavior and the lack of other attachment figures. Alexia was the only human Alfred ever loved. Even after she went to her cryogenic sleep, Alfred was unable to get close to anyone else. With Alexia gone, Alfred almost lost his sanity and only recovered enough to be functional. Unable to form new bonds with other people, the only way to cope with his loneliness was to develop a dissociative identity disorder to be with “Alexia” again. He seemed to be more or less aware of his disease, though. Why else should he be so paranoid about keeping people away from his private residence despite its neglected state and prohibit any questions regarding “his sister”?

His inability to form relationships also may lead to Alfred partially losing touch with reality. His notes show how detached he was from human interactions outside of a work environment. (“Once that has been achieved, I'll build a palace where only nobles may gather. I cannot allow the unwashed to see my dear Alexia, to whom my life is devoted to.”). Here he is idealizing aristocrats in a rather naïve way, most likely based on fairy tales and his experience with his own family, not with actual people. It’s just wishful thinking that he will eventually find friends among his own kind and that these people are better than the ones who work for him. In reality, Alfred put himself above others and developed a general disregard for human life, as you can see in multiple of his actions. He treated his employees like shit (canceled their vacation, “He doesn't even treat us like human beings.”, “Work is extremely demanding, and there's nothing fun about it. I'd rather be dead!”), threw his sectary into prison for asking too many questions and killed him later on. Alfred also used the prisoners for construction work and executed them afterward to silence them. Plus, he hired and supported a schizophrenic anatomist who tortured and killed people for entertainment. And like in his sister's case, his young age when Alfred started working contributed to this. As I said above, he took care of the Antarctica Base after Alexia’s “death” with 13. While Alexia was at least a child prodigy, Alfred wasn’t and only got the position via family connections. The people working there likely took him even less seriously than his sister (an unqualified child becomes the boss of more experienced or even long-term employees), which forced him to treat them in the most authoritarian way possible to get at least some respect. Even when he grew older, Alfred never backed away from this direction and risked letting his guard down. Other humans were nothing but insignificant insects to him anyway.

Contrary to his interaction with other people, Alfred also had very low self-esteem when it came to Alexia. Though, he wasn’t unhappy with the power imbalance. All his actions were aimed at making her happy regardless of this causing him discomfort. He dedicated his life to her and saw himself as her servant. She was his queen, but he wasn’t equal to her, not a king or at least a prince, but a servant. Alexander had indoctrinated him with his behavior, achievement-orientated education and giving up on him right after birth for lacking the desired genetic traits. He made it clear to Alfred that he stood below his sister if he couldn’t keep up with her in terms of intellect. Even though Alfred spent more than 15 years without Alexander, he could never overcome this lesson. Finding out that he shouldn’t have existed in the first place and that he was, in fact, genetically inferior to his sister likely left some scars as well.

And then we have Alfred’s somewhat childish demeanor. There is this room filled with toys in his residence on Rockfort Island. He is 27 (23 when the mansion was built). Why does he need this? He is too old for teddy bears and children's carousels. As discussed above, Alfred’s childhood ended abruptly at 13. From this point on, he was forced to behave like an adult. There wasn’t a smooth progression through his teenage years. He had to work and take responsibility. Even before that, his early years were likely lonely and dull when Alexia was too busy to spend time with him. Alfred must have hoped that he could make up for the childhood he and Alexia (the real one and/or his alter ego) never really had, at least a little bit. For this reason, he collected all those toys. If he ever actually used them is another question. The dolls in the lower levels of his mansion seem to fulfill a different purpose, though. They likely belonged to "Alexia". The real Alexia apparently collected dolls. In her room are several dolls neatly arranged in a cabinet and don’t look used. Alfred based his Alexia-persona on his sister and just continued her hobby.

Alexia’s doll collection

Discovering the Truth

The event that changed everything was Alfred discovering the truth about his and Alexia’s origin. Before the said event, the Ashford family seemed to be in unhealthy yet stable conditions. Alexander favored Alexia over Alfred a lot. Though Alfred was never jealous of his sister, quite the contrary, he always admired and only wanted all the best for her. Up to this point, Alfred must have thought Alexia hit the jackpot in the genetic lottery. Not supporting her intellect in any way possible would have been a waste of potential. So enduring Alexander’s emotional absence for his sister’s sake was bearable.

Now the truth shed another light on the situation. Alexander’s documents revealed that Alexia wasn’t particularly lucky. She was planned, designed to be this way. On the other hand, Alfred was particularly unlucky for not inheriting the same genes. Not only that, he should have never existed in the first place. Alexander’s emotional neglect wasn’t just a result of concentrating on Alexia. He straight-up didn’t care about Alfred since he was not what he wanted. Alexander only kept him around because Alfred was the living proof of what he has done, and no one, especially not Spencer, should find out about his little secrets. Even after all those years, Alexander didn’t see Alfred as his son, he was still just the failed byproduct of an experiment. Alfred wrote that he hated Alexander and wanted him dead. You can also see an expression of Alfred’s hatred in the Antarctica Base, where he had destroyed Alexander’s portrait (who else had the motive to do this?).

Destroyed Painting

Being created unintentionally and less intelligent than your clone sister certainly sucks, but this shouldn’t matter if Alexander would have been a good father, regardless. Alfred wasn’t even angry because Alexia had something he didn’t have. Whether her intelligence was natural or artificially created didn’t downgrade her achievements and it certainy didn’t change his attitude toward her.

Discovering the truth was certainly harder for Alfred. And Alexia was smart enough that by this point, she must have figured out that Alexander was using her to do what he couldn’t. But realizing that your father only “loved” you because you were a successful experiment must still be hard to swallow. If Alexia would have been a failure as well, Alexander most likely would have adapted the procedure and repeated the experiment until he got what he wanted, a genetically advanced clone of Veronica. That’s how science works, after all. In that case, Alexia would have gotten the same treatment as Alfred, condemned to a life as laboratory waste.

I don’t think you can blame the twins for hating Alexander after all they have been through. They must have felt like they were Alexander’s lab rats rather than his children after learning the truth. Feeling used and lied to, Alexia turned the table around and gave Alexander a taste of his own medicine. He never cared about her or Alfred, at least not in a way a father should. Why should she care about him? What has he ever done for her? He leeched on her success. That’s it. He used her to achieve things out of his reach but didn’t contribute. Alexander was useless to her, according to the lessons he taught her. And, contrary to her brother, he didn’t even give Alexia emotional comfort. Using him as a test subject allowed her to hit two birds with one stone. She could give Alfred the revenge he wanted and test her virus.

Conclusion

Alexander contributed a lot to the situation escalating the way it did. He never intended to mistreat the twins, physically they got everything they needed, but he was too absorbed in his ambitions and forgot that the twins are human beings that need more than food, water, and a comfortable environment. If he just would have raised them more like normal children and been the father and moral guidance they needed, much pain could have been prevented. It’s not Alexia and Alfred’s fault what became of them. However, the twins are still responsible for their own deeds, especially Alfred. He lived alone for more than 15 years. During this time, at least he could have tried to get closer to others or show some empathy for other people. For example, Harman seemed to be genuinely concerned about him. He could have been something like a friend or fatherly figure for Alfred if he would have accepted it. Also, not everything is linked to Alexander, some issues are rather a result of the general circumstances.

#resident evil #resident evil code veronica #alexia ashford #alfred ashford #alexander ashford #ashford twins #meta #🩸🌙#i rewrote this 3 or 4 times and i’m still not happy with how it turned out #anyway i’m not going to rewrite it again #it's too long and the interest in this topic is rather limited

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suchine-toki · 2 years

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Gintsu Nightlife Event

Prompt: Sunrise - Sunset

Gintoki is reassured by the presence of Tsukuyo, who tells him about the events that took place in the last two years he was absent. Eventually he’s able to open up to her since they both went through similar experiences.

Tsukuyo had already accepted to just be his friend until Gintoki kisses her. She then finds out it was the second time they kissed, since when she was drunk she stole a kiss from Gintoki on another occasion, which made him reflect on how he felt and what he wanted to do.

Being their first formal relationship, both Gintoki and Tsukuyo make many mistakes at the beginning, such as not knowing how to handle jealousy (especially from Gintoki’s side) or be very distant (Tsukuyo). Over time they learn how to be together as a couple.

They realize they don’t have to belong to each other and that’s okay. They love each other, want to be together, and are willing to work through their problems, and that’s what’s important.

As each influences the other, Gintoki becomes more responsible and Tsukuyo more laid back.

In public they call each other by their names, but when they are alone, they call each other “honey” and “darling”.

When they went to bed for the first time, they were both nervous. Gintoki was afraid of being too rough, and Tsukuyo was embarrassed. Eventually they both let go.

As time went by, Tsukuyo felt more confident of herself in this aspect and then it was she who suggested things to Gintoki thanks to the knowledge she acquired from her friends in Yoshiwara. Although some suggestions took him out of his comfort zone, he was willing to try new things that he later found very pleasant lol.

Gintoki decides to propose to Tsukuyo in the middle of a battlefield, telling her that if they both come out alive, he wants her to marry him.

Gintoki and Tsukuyo wanted a private wedding with only their close friends as guests. However, due to their connections to Kabukicho and Yoshiwara, it ended up being a much bigger event than expected. At the end of the day Gintoki accepted it because more guests meant more envelopes with gift money.

They were living together in Yorozuya’s apartment for a while until Tsukuyo unexpectedly got pregnant. So, they were forced to buy a house. They looked for one that was at the same distance from both Kabukicho and Yoshiwara. Probably in the Bunkyo neighborhood, two-story and modest.

Meanwhile Gintoki kept renting the Yorozuya’s apartment, but sharing expenses with Kagura, who stayed living there.

Tsukuyo oversees the managing of the family budget.

Both Gintoki and Tsukuyo were very insecure at the beginning about becoming parents and wondered if they were ready for it, given the childhood they both had. They finally decide to go ahead and do it together.

Gintoki starts taking long, risky but well-paying jobs to make sure his children have what he and Tsukuyo didn’t have as kids, like toys and clean clothes.

They had fraternal twins, a girl and a boy. Gintoki chose the godfathers and Tsukuyo the godmothers.

They would probably adopt a cat as a pet for their children because they tend to be more independent.

Because Gintoki’s job is much more flexible than Tsukuyo’s, he does more of the parenting.

Gintoki is more fatherly than Tsukuyo, although she is still an excellent mother.

Gintoki would’ve liked to have more children, but for Tsukuyo two was enough. Also, they needed a lot of money to support all their expenses.

Their children probably received a much better and more advanced education than what they’d access to in their childhood.

Like any couple, they also face their marital crises (Gintoki due to his bad habits and Tsukuyo for being a workaholic). Although they’ve been on the verge of divorce on more than one occasion, they always overcome their problems.

As they got older, they began to travel more outside of Japan, both to the rest of the world and to other planets.

Gintoki is the first to die during the fall. He preferred it this way anyway, since it would be very painful to see the person he spent his life with go before him. He dies peacefully surrounded by his grandchildren.

Tsukuyo promises him that she will follow him soon, and so she does, a year later in the same season of the year.

Both are buried in the Sakata family tomb, next to a maple tree, where the breeze gracefully blows the autumn leaves to its base.

#Gintama #Sakata Gintoki #Dadtoki #Tsukuyo #gintsu #Gintsu family #nightlife2022 #銀月ナイトライフ2022 #Based on a fic idea I never wrote lol #Hope you like it!#text #Headcanon #my post

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muutosarchive · 1 year

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vanessa / interpretation of fnaf lore part 2. (therapy logs / Fazbear Funtime Service - transfer to mega pizzaplex & beyond)

Going back to Vanessa's time as a beta tester in FNAF VR: once she found out about the player character of the VR experience, she lied about her family history to her mandated therapists in preparation for the day she encounters Afton. She feeds a sad story to whoever would listen, about her evil father bill, & how he manipulated her into causing her mother's suicide. this way, once it's in the system - glitchtrap could access it, & assess her as the perfect 'target' for his manipulation. rebellious side, hidden to resemble his daughter more. to become a sympathetic guise for the evil afton to corrupt. But, little does she know... She's always wanted him in her head. She wants to help him, and she wants to be with him. She loves him.

Im not suggesting Afton hasn't, and will not continue to manipulate Vanessa. However, Afton's selective empathy locks onto Vanessa. She represents new life, and the rebirth of his dreams. That of bringing Fredbear to life. His creativity and drive, meeting the skills he's learned next to Henry's robotic creation. Those which couldn't hold a candle to the type of things William could craft. She means ending his suffering in the VR experience. It's clear William cared about his children, his former wife.. His creations, or the bonnie suit at the very least. He is not hollow, in fact it is grief that has warped his sense of self.

now to preface this, In the unused E-Mails, Vanessa was an employee of Fazbear Funtime Service. A Service she & Afton launched, as a better attempt to soften the old reputation of Fazbear Ent. This is where she and Afton began their plans, as her correspondences with Afton are clearly referenced during these therapist logs. She began to change. I can prove that she began to show proficient skills in things she shouldn't, which is supporting my theory that Afton is using her as a vessel, which will also bleed into her transfer to the pizzaplex. but I'll get into that later. I'm just trying to set-up my wish to prove that afton, without a shadow of a doubt, had reason and motive to be controlling Vanessa even into the events of Security Breach.

(following therapy sessions are all taking place during her time at Funtime, unless otherwise stated)

We get, rather early evidence of Vanessa's projection of her own manipulation, as she knows their logs will be public knowledge. She wants to have their sympathy. So, she appears mild mannered at first & cooperative in the mandated therapy. However, they also mention anxiety - which could appear aggravated from someone looking in from the outside. Especially considering her erratic behavior, but i'm getting ahead myself. This is the first time her conversations with Afton are referenced, while she's still working at Fazbear Funtime:

Bringing up these chat logs, or Afton, will prove to be a fatal mistake for her therapists. But we'll also get to that. She has about five during the course of the logs, and they switch near & around the time that they begin to discuss her personal activity during business hours.

This timeline aligns with my theory of their planning to acquire the land, & rebuild the plex atop of the old fazbear location while she bides her time working at the new, smaller company under the new Fazbear Entertainment LLC. All they needed was a cheap office space at first and enough animatronics to start rolling out the characters to events. also allowing Afton to collect more remnant from the children to experiment with animating the robots by injecting their circuitry with the living metal.

All the while, Afton has all public information still relevant to Fazbear entertainment, while they're using the Fazbear Funtime revenue to fund the plans for the pizzaplex. business is booming, so things are taking less time than either of them expected. First expanding the animatronic skin line for each of the core characters, before starting construction on the mall.

i also assume that the conversations are in code, which is a written code that appears to be one thing but really is another. easy for glitch to teach her, easy for them to talk through each other with no incoming source. evidence of that, later.

she's very defensive about who she's talking about despite having no reason to be as far as i'm concerned. there's nothing concerning yet, & besides -- she controls her fate at the company. but even if she didn't, there's no evidence of her doing anything. so, this just confirms it's Afton, as she would not feel the need to jump so quickly to anyone else's defense. Cagey in particular, because she knows how valuable Glitch's CPU would be in the wrong hands. she mentions a co-worker but that doesn't explain it away.

now, my next point is the clear evidence that William or Glitchtrap (Afton) is possessing her during some of these sessions. the ones she refuses to talk in, & is seemingly bothered by the simplest things. things that wouldn't make sense, nor will later. such as here: she'll appear to have an aversion to bright light... but later on, vanessa expresses that she likes the blue sky. whether afton is just more present WITH ness, or whether he's completely in control.. that's up for debate. though, i take it he's not in complete control as much as one might think, based on my theory.

mind you, i'm not cutting out v's lines. she only says No.

why would vanessa care about being in a cubby or a cave? she wouldn't. afton would. the man who spent up to 3 decades trapped in a suit, in a sealed off room that was invisible to even the robots. the VR experience... fazbear frights. the fact that he's not used to having human eyes, anymore. of course he has an aversion to light. of course he's more comfortable and happier in the darkness. because that's all he knows, now.

this same thing also happens with flowers, later on.

.... but later, she doesn't have the same aversion to those flowers. i'll get to that in part 2 because i ran out of photo posts!!

#vanessa * / headcanon #suicide mention tw #manipulation tw #i'm such a genius i'm such a genius

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letsgofoletsgo · 1 year

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Pacific Rim: Insurrection

I’ve made a rewrite of Uprising that I call Insurrection. I thought the idea of Newton being swayed by the Kaiju was in interesting idea, but felt that the way the movie handled it was a disservice to his character. I also learned of the existence of Kaiju-worshipping cults within Pacific Rim, which I found to be an interesting concept to explore, so I tooled with that. This is a rough synopsis of my version, hope you enjoy.

In 2030, Newton is approached by a man named Chen Yang who claims he is similar to him in his fascination with the Kaiju. He offers to show Newton around his research facility in New England, to which Newton accepts. Chen and his organization, Sunrise Inc, have amassed a large collection of Kaiju specimens, and recently have acquired a Kaiju brain. Chen tells Newton that he read about his experiences with drifting, and offers to have him drift with their brain for research purposes. Newton asks why he doesn’t do it himself, and Chen explains that he not only has attempted and found to be not compatible, but he wanted someone with prior experience to do the job. He also notes that he wants to learn as much as he can about them in case they attack again. Newton is slightly skeptical, but accepts, eager for knowledge himself. He successfully drifts with the brain, and while he’s not able to see much, feels a “high” afterwards. Chen says that he theorizes that it may take multiple drifts in order to see anything, and instructs him to return for further testing. Newton agrees, unaware of Chen’s true intentions.

Meanwhile, Newton is busy with his work at Shao Industries. He and Liwen are working on the remote piloted drones, which they hope to use as an alternative to Jaegers. As Newton undergoes more drifting in the passing months, an idea starts to come to him. Without Liwen’s knowledge, he begins building his own fleet drones, all without their initial programming. Newton’s reasoning is that they could be used as backups, or given alternate programming; but the Precursors have already begun to infect his mind while he is none the wiser.

As months turn into years, Newton and Chen continue their drift experiments. Newton initially felt a kinship with Chen, as they both felt like the odd one out in their lives, both regarding the Kaiju and otherwise. As time progresses however, he becomes more skeptical of his motives, as he can feel himself be altered by the drifting. He cannot bring himself to confront him though, as he lacks the evidence, and part of him doesn’t want to stop drifting regardless because of the rush.

In 2035, Newton reunites with Hermann in Sydney. They both spectate the conference, which Mako is alive for. However, the rogue Jaeger still attacks, and the conference is halted while it’s dealt with. Some time later, Mako’s vote is announced, and to much surprise she voted for the drones to be sent out. Jake questions why she chose so, and she states she was pressured to by her representatives, given the mass public panic caused by the attack. She then reveals the defunct Jaeger production facility in Siberia, theorizing that it may have connection to the rogue Jaeger.

Meanwhile, Chen arrives at Shao Industries to see Newton. He asks about his “progress”, and Newton finds himself explaining his plan with the drones, something he wasn’t intending to tell Chen. Chen is pleased, telling him that everything’s coming together. Later, when the drones are deployed and start opening breaches across the globe, Newton’s mind is fully swayed by the Precursors. Chen reveals to Hermann that he is actually the leader of a cult that worships the Kaiju, using the guise of a laboratory to cover up his true motives. He recruited Newton as a vessel to communicate with the Precursors, and with their knowledge, learned how to replicate Kaiju brains to put into the drones.

Liwen arrives, and is shocked to see Chen. She attempts to fire, but he and Newton escape. She tells Hermann that they used to be business partners many years ago, but after the Kaiju’s defeat in 2025, he vanished. She notes that he began to have something of an obsession with the Kaiju, and likely spiraled into his own insanity. The final battle then ensues, Chen and Newton observing. Despite the power of the Kaiju, the Jaegers reign victorious once again.

Chen is knocked out and Newton is restrained. Despite his arrest and subsequent downfall of his organization, Chen remains undeterred, confident that the Kaiju will one day stake their claim. Newton is placed in a medical facility while the drift effects wear off, which takes months. He goes through a period of mental turmoil, not only at the fading effects, but that he was being manipulated for so long, almost causing the end of the world. He does eventually recover, though the mental scars continue to haunt him.

#insurrection au #also as a potential threequel idea #maybe the surviving members of Chen's cult are the villains #and it focuses on them attempting to finish the job #and/or seeking revenge on K-science #because I for one would love to see that kind of concept explored further #pacific rim #pacific rim uprising #just something i wonder #under a rose tinted microscope

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razieltwelve · 1 year

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Visitor (Final Rose x Bleach)

“Hello, fellow humans!”

Masaki’s lips twitched. “I see you’ve decided to drop by.”

Diana smiled. “Well, of course. Dropping by for dinner is something that regular humans do all the time.”

This time, Masaki couldn’t stop herself from chuckling. “Yes, of course. We’re all humans here.”

Behind her, Isshin laughed and waved. “Hello, fellow human.”

“Come in,” Masaki said. “Dinner is just about ready.”

“Do you need any help in the kitchen?” Diana asked.

“No. It should be fine. Isshin, why don’t you keep Diana company for a bit?”

“Sure.”

In the years since they’d first met, Diana had continued to drop by. Funnily enough, Masaki would always get a text message beforehand, and the idea of Diana using a phone never failed to make her smile. Of course, Diana had demonstrated that she not only knew how to use a phone but was also more well versed in how human technology worked than anyone Masaki knew. How Diana had acquired that knowledge, Masaki had no idea, but Diana had happily used that knowledge multiple times to help out around the house.

X X X

“Nasty business with Rukia,” Diana drawled.

Isshin nodded. He wasn’t even going to question how Diana knew about the whole affair. He’d just accepted that she had her ways. She’d even used those ways to give Ichigo a bit of extra information, for which Isshin was very grateful. He’d been tempted to ask Diana to go and help his son rescue Rukia, but the image of Soul Society in flames while Diana devoured everything in her path had stayed his hand.

She might very well accept, and he still had friends there that he would prefer that Diana avoided. Frankly, he wasn’t sure if there was anyone outside of the Captain Commander who could face her, and who knew how much stronger she’d gotten? She was just so adept at hiding her true nature and power.

“I’m glad that things worked out,” Isshin said quietly. “Except for Aizen and his followers.” The ending to the whole affair had left a sour taste in Ichigo’s mouth, and Isshin couldn’t blame him. Aizen was out there, plotting and scheming. Who knew what he might do next?

“Ah. About that.” Diana smiled impishly. “Do I have your solemn word that what I’m about to tell you will not be shared with anyone except your wife and your son until I say otherwise?”

Isshin’s brows furrowed. “Hmm... very well. I give you my word.” If she had new information...

“You don’t have to worry about Aizen. I ate him.”

“...” Isshin blinked. “What?”

“I ate Aizen. He tasted pretty nice too.”

“Are you serious?”

“Yep.” Diana nodded. “He showed up in Hueco Mundo and tried to throw his weight around. He might have succeeded too if I wasn’t there. That zanpakuto of his had a very nasty power. But I was there, and he underestimated me. That was all it took.”

Isshin swallowed thickly. He and Masaki had discussed Diana many times over the years. He had a rough idea of what she was capable of. “Then... his powers?”

“They’re in better hands now,” Diana said. “Now, this all needs to be hush hush. I have projects going on that require Soul Society to continue to believe that Aizen is a threat. However, your family has a very personal stake in this matter. I’m sure you’ve been worried that Aizen and his followers might launch an attack on you here in the Human World, right?”

Isshin nodded slowly. That had been one of his worst fears. As he was now, he had no way of protecting his family from Aizen. Ichigo, for all that he’d become incredibly strong with remarkable speed, stood no chance against Aizen either. And his two daughters had only just been introduced to the true nature of the world after Ichigo had acquired his powers. They were learning quickly, but they lacked Ichigo’s raw power and had essentially none of his experience. A surgical strike from Aizen, hitting with enough speed and precision to avoid Soul Society’s forces... such a strike could easily end with his entire family dead or captured.

“Yes. That possibility had occurred to me.”

“Exactly. I just wanted to let you know that you don’t have to worry about.” Diana shrugged. “Plus, I do enjoy a home cooked human meal now and then. I don’t really need to eat human food, but it still tastes nice.”

Isshin took a deep breath and then bowed his head. “Thank you... for dealing with Aizen and for letting me know. How... how long must I keep this a secret?”

“No more than a month or two. That should be enough for my purposes. And relax. I know you still have buddies in Soul Society. Unless they come after me and mine, they’ve got nothing to worry about.”

“Ah. Thank you.”

Diana grinned. “You’re welcome.”

X X X

“Yo.”

Ichigo climbed up onto the roof and sat down next to Diana. “Dad told me what you did. Thanks.”

Diana patted him on the head. “Don’t mention it, kiddo. You did really well saving Rukia. You should be proud. But you don’t have to do everything yourself. Let us grownups pitch in every now and then.”

Ichigo grinned. “All the training paid off.” He scowled. “But you couldn’t have told us that Yoruichi could turn into a cat?”

“Heh. I was wondering when she’d let you guys know. Nah. I thought it would be funny. Did she ambush you while you were taking a bath or something?” Ichigo’s expression said it all. “So... you and the gang all okay?”

“Nothing that a bit of rest won’t fix,” Ichigo said. “But Aizen... he was strong. Way stronger than I expected. Way stronger than anyone expected.” He took a deep breath. “I want to be that strong. Seeing him do all that stuff and not being able to stop him...”

“It’s not a good feeling, is it?” Diana murmured. “Feeling helpless.”

“It sucks.”

“There’s more trouble brewing,” Diana said. “Quincy trouble.”

“Shit. Do my parents know?” Ichigo’s fists clenched. “I know mom can’t use her Quincy powers anymore, but...”

“They already know. Unfortunately, there’s still a lot that I don’t know, but I’ll have more eyes in Soul Society soon that might help. In any case, I just thought I’d let you know. You need to learn how to use your Quincy powers - and, yes, you do have some - as well as hone your skills. Right now, you’re like a sledgehammer, but that won’t work against someone who has the power to match you and the skill and experience to back it up.”

“Yeah.” Ichigo nodded firmly. “I’ll see what I can do. Can you help out with that?”

“Hmm...” Diana pursed her lips. “I’m going to be very busy, but I have a few subordinates who could help you.” She saw the look on his face and laughed. “Don’t worry. I’ll make sure they know that they’re not supposed to kill you or anything.”

“Yeah. I’d appreciate that.” Ichigo headed back into the house. “Rukia will be dropping by soon. Are you going to stick around, or...?”

“Nah. It’s probably better if I get going.”

X X X

Author’s Notes

Diana continues to plot and scheme. Gin’s really going to have to earn his pay cheque, but he might just stumble across the whole Quincy thing in time to warn Diana about it. And you can bet that if Soul Society gets attacked, Gin will be calling for backup. He’s confident, but he’s not stupid, and he’s not going to take any risks when it comes to Rangiku’s safety.

Ywach vs Yamamoto will be interesting this time around since Yamamoto has both his arms. Plus, you just know that Diana and some of her elites will show up to steal stuff, kill people, raid research facilities, and all that jazz. Plus, there are so many wonderful people to eat too.

#final rose #bleach #fanfiction #diana yun farron #masaki kurosaki #ichigo kurosaki #isshin kurosaki

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techtired · 2 months

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Bubble Bratz: Age, Height, Weight, Bio, Boyfriend, Family And Net Worth

Thanks to her magnetic personality and impressive talent, bubble Bratz is one of her generation's most beloved social media stars. Bubble Bratz, whose friends and family call her Maddie May, is an American girl who loves to have a good time. She is passionate about modeling and creating entertaining videos for the TikTok platform. You might have seen her before if you're into TikTok! Her ability to generate videos that make people laugh or happy is why she's famous. Her motivational path demonstrates that following one's passion and creativity can lead to great success. So be ready and start learning about her fantastic life by bucking back. 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